#bc everyone else feels too awkward LMAO

[alyimoss]

he would do this as in it fits his character, but he wouldnt do it in canon bc he literally would not get a chance to as xtale and the skelebros becoming his kids was basically an accident (or, rather, it was planned i think but the timing of when it happened wasnt?? and it caused some things like him being unable to see that frisk had given muffet a family and him just straight up forgetting to give monsters a history) BUT he would definitely monitor what is watched in his house to compensate.

hes shown in canon to have visions of his desired future that he uses to make decisions in the present that will lead him to it (biggest example i can think of is him ordering cross to get frisk down from a tree with his magic and then immediately stopping him from doing so as he saw that frisk getting down safely would somehow compromise that future. and then he immediately goes to blame it all on cross lmao father of the year) so i think part of the decision making process is. that. like yeah he wants to keep media like this out of the brothers reach for easier manipulation, but also if the visions tell him them seeing this movie is going to butterfly effect into the future he strives towards?? fuck it.

that being said cross definitely watches that movie at some point and does not get the point.

its suggested by killer as part of a movie night (he chooses all the disney princess movies. kind of as a joke. horror and dust dont care enough abt movie choice bc theyre gonna sleep thru that shit anyway and cross doesnt wanna be the one with a dissenting opinion so he doesnt say anything) and as hes watching he just keeps asking questions like "why are they painting the mother as a villain? shes being a good mother. this is what good parents do. rapunzel should feel lucky to have such a good mother" and the others are like "ohhh they done boinked you up at the boy factory.... your dad fucked you right up at the son factory huh."

xgaster the kind of dad to make sure the tangled movie doesn’t exist in his universe just in case his kids see it and realize something might be up with his choice in parenting style

[nobodybetterlookatme]

I've never heard of emts working only at events? What's that like for you if you don't mind my asking?

Yeah, there are ambulance companies that staff certain events, but there's some event specific companies out there lmao. For me specifically, it's almost entirely college events, whether it's happening on a campus or not. It's not great, usually pretty boring, but it's better than being on an ambulance or in a hospital. We do get actual emergencies sometimes, but usually it's just getting drunk people to the tent or giving out water and bandaids lmao. Again, boring as fuck, but I chose this over working on a 911 rig, so that's on me 😔 if I'm being so real tho, other than my coworkers, the best part of the job is the food lmaoooo it's so good and all the food trucks/food booths give discounts or free food to us depending on the location and event. And there's almost always a ton of downtime, so I basically just get paid to sit there and vibe for the most part

[vampiremourning]

.

[j-esbian]

i wish i knew. when it was my turn to talk about myself

[blockedbykei]

𝐒𝐖𝐄𝐄𝐓𝐄𝐒𝐓 𝐄𝐂𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐘 !!

— haikyuu men as your boyfriend (ft. tsukki, tobio, hinata, kuroo, osamu, oikawa, & ushijima)

— a/n: in the midst of writing another fic (spoiler alert: it's kageyama), i've decided to rest my brain and give you an insight as to how the haikyuu men will be your boyfriend lol (lets pretend i didn't just insert my boyfriend's attitude in some of these dudes bc he is as sassy as tsukki and as obsessed with vball as kageyama)

tsukishima kei

- the type of boyfriend to close his fist when you try to hold his hand

- pretends he doesn't know you when you do something embarrassing

- greets you like he's annoyed but he actually isn't, he'll give your forehead a kiss after

- he's very supportive of your clothing, wear a bra and an underwear wherever you go– he wouldn't care. but when he senses the crowd isn't safe, he would constantly remind you to put a hand on your chest when you bend, or put a hand on your knee when you sig

- he gets flustered easily when you giggle whenever you see him use his phone without glasses and look like this -.-

- everyone says he's shy when it comes to pda. and that is so true. he would hold your hand but most of the time, you wrap your hand around his fucking pinky. he would occasionally wrap an arm around your shoulders, or you'd wrap your hands around his arm. kisses in public are chastised into cheeks or temples

- whenever you fight and you go to your room to sulk alone, he walks in without knocking, scooches on the bed beside you, and spoons you. it hurts him to see you cry even if you don't see it in his face, and he'll hold you in silence until you've gathered the courage to face him and talk about it

- biggest gift giver EVER

- he would literally get you anything that you want. you send him a pic of a dress and tell him you want it? he'll buy it for you even if you don't tell him to

- remembers every date of a special occasion, like first kiss, when you said yes to being his boyfriend, all that stuff

- when you're together for a long time, you don't talk that much yet you do your hobbies together. not because nothing's new and fun anymore, but because you've gotten so used to each other that the silence between you was comforting and filled with so much love.

- when you do talk though, you'd think he wouldn't indulge in whatever topic you ensue, but he would actually talk to you like it is the hottest tea in the century

- is a small spoon when he's so needy

- because of his love for strawberry shortcake, he actually knows how to bake it. you have it every weekend. and if he isn't so busy, you'd have it everyday.

- he taught you how to bake it *swoons*

- he smells like strawberries because he uses your perfumes all the time

kageyama tobio

- he smells the ball from far away

- like when you're both on a date or just hanging out outside, the minute he hears that exact sound of a volleyball bouncing on the ground, he will snap his head towards that direction

- LIKE A DOG

- i hc that he knows how to play the piano, so he has one in his room. when you hang out, you lay on the bed and he plays whatever song that comes into his mind

- he's so awkward even if you guys have been together for a long time

- on the court he's all badass but he's actually a loser LMAO

- biggest loser ever but he's so cute though

- like when he asked you out on a date, he was bowing and yelling "PLEASE GO OUT WITH ME" like he's so desperate and pathetic it's so adorable

- he's a good bf tho even if sometimes he's too preoccupied with volleyball. it's you above everything else so if you called him in the middle of practice, best believe he's running to you in a minute

- he's such a heavy sleeper. he sleeps with his eyes open sometimes and it creeps you out to wake up in the middle of the night with him staring at you with half lidded eyes

- when you fight he sometimes cries and will ask u to hold him

- doesn't know social cues sometimes you feel like you're mothering him but in a good way

- awkward kisser too sometimes he forgets to close his eyes

- when he takes a shit, it's always hard. like his poop is hard, so you hear him grunting in the bathroom

- he smells like metal sometimes but when he's at home he smells like markers its kind of addicting

hinata shoyo

- fucking TONE DEAF

- sucks at cooking, prefers your food over anyone else's

- loves cuddling he's such a tiny clingy baby you just want to eat him up and keep him in your stomach

- when you're sad, he goes out of his way to make you smile, even if it includes him hetting hurt

- compliments you ALL the time like he's all "wow baby you're so good at this and that you're so amazing please marry me"

- sticks to your side at every social gathering and will hold your hand the whole time

- he will feel like a literal baby if you're taller than him, and he LOVES taller women i so believe that

- when a match lasts for more than 3 sets, hinata is extremely tired and will pass out the minute he steps foot into your home

- he smells really good, like his skin smells amazing

- will do skincare with u bc he's sometimes as overdramatic as you when he sees red bumps on his face

- loves to give and receive a massage

- he's so chronically online too bc he's influenced by kenma so he's always up to date with all the trends and music. but he's also incredibly stupid with technology

- his phone always overheats

- twitches randomly in his sleep and sometimes he's so messy in bed he ends up pushing you off

- loves to take baths with you and let you play with his hair hehe

- the softest boy ever too like you would both always have a kitten staying in your home until someone can foster or adopt them because there's always a lot of sick strays outside of your home

- has a sweet tooth. his favorite is cotton candy

kuroo tetsuro

- he's actually emo sometimes

- sometimes because not only with his stupid bangs, but because when you're not giving him attention, he will play loud music that will get your attention, sit on the couch, and cross his arms and pout until you look at him

- he's one of those people that will get mad when you touch his hair

- smells like soap

- he treats you like a princess though like when he brings you to his parties he will bring you EVERYWHERE

- like a bodyguard too, will bring all your stuff even if they're heavier than his gym bag

- you're the one to always patch things between him and kenma when they fight because they're like literal children

- asks for your help to get kenma to eat when he plays too much

- a whiny bitch too like he's the type of person that's actually so clean so when he encounters a room that's dirty or a bathroom he thinks is too wet or has too much grime in the tiles, he will gag and pinch his nose (same goes for tsukishima)

- has a good sense in fashion, he dresses you A LOT

- puts your bag on your shoulder and scolds you like a mom

- scared of cockroaches

- literally would climb up a wall and sob when he sees one

- and he's such a good captain too like sometimes you'd see him talking to his teammates and give them advice outside of volleyball. he's their big brother

- he's your study buddy all the time. when he's not too preoccupied with volleyball, you're both studying together

- he cherishes your accomplishments and is always present at your events

- he's close with your friends that sometimes you see him playfully hump your boy-space-friends and moan like he's riding them

- used to be kenma's discord kitten too

- one time, in his drunken state, he showed you a picture of him and kenma in maid outfits during one of kenma's gaming streams, because they were both drunk and in lock down

- whenever you see the matches or hinata, tsukki, or kageyama, kuroo feels proud and tears up at how much they've grown

- loves kids. wants to plant a baby in you.

miya osamu

- when you wake him up in the middle of the night and ask for food, he WILL cook for you

- smells like fried chicken but its alright it smells good either way

- when you go to work, he always packs your lunch

- when you fight, he knows just what to cook to cheer you up

- he loves food so much that you can't remember the last time you haven't eaten, because he ALWAYS feeds you

- when he cooks at home, he wears a pretty pink apron just for you

- listens to music when he cooks, and even when he showers too

- when you have a big social event, he'll volunteer to give a portion of food in your event or actually cater for them

- when he cooks something that you don't end up liking, he is DISTRAUGHT; will do anything for you to like it again because there's no way that he can't feed you something delicious

- sometimes, when atsumu comes over, they both play volleyball INSIDE the house and atsumu sometimes gets too much, but before you could scold him, osamu's already on his ass

- as aforementioned, always expect midnight snacks

- he's like that dude on tiktok who can make everything out of chocolate, except his is onigri. or, well, he can shape anything made out of rice

- one time, on your anniversary, you woke up to a rice shaped like a life-sized teddy bear and it was actually so cool

- you have your own spot in his shop

- and he actually let you design the blueprint for his shop because he wants it to be yours too :(

oikawa tooru

- sometimes you don't know if he's your boyfriend or an opponent at a beauty contest

- he values skincare more than you do like he's buying face masks and exfoliators and everything and you caught him one time sleeping in one of those peel off mask things

- and he cries when you take off those peel off masks

- smells like rich perfume that hurts your nose

- but oikawa takes volleyball seriously. when he lost to karasuno, you caught him sobbing in his bed when you came to check up on him, and he let you hold him until he fell asleep

- that was also when he fell in love with you lol

- before you guys dated, you two were so close that tne girls actually stopped approaching him one time because they thought you were officially his girlfriend after he held your hand during a field trip to the museum because you almost got lost

- sometimes oikawa doesn't know who he's more scared of: you or iwaizume? bc both of you are always on his ass making fun of him and scolding him

- but he cherishes you so much though like he's treating you like his certified baby girl all the time— you're getting fucking princess treatment every single day. you don't remember the feeling of a bag in your hand because he's always CARRYING it

- oikawa is proud to take up the role as your assistant

- and he's also just as sassy as you are

- he's also rich so like you're always on adventures and on dates outside. but sometimes he likes to stay at home and cook for you even if it tastes like shit

- a jealous bitch

- one time a guy asked you for directions and oikawa told him to "turn right and then you'll see a mirror that tells you you're a piece of shit"

- you scold him after that. he doesn't care

ushijima wakatoshi

- bad at social cues

- he's like an old man and you're his social media manager bc why is he texting everyone through EMAIL when sms exists already

- there was that time when he sent you a nude and it went "was thinking of you. I miss you — Ushijima Wakatoshi" AND LIKE??

- he's literally "i'm so happy for you" o_o

- and he is though its just that he's always so dazed sometimes you think he's a robot

- he's a living baby though like he's one to be honest about something that he doesn't realize what he says and you feel embarrassed for him too so you're just kind of like sweetly telling him that it's not nice to say that someone smells like cigarettes or that their breath stinks

- one time, when you and tendou surprise him, you're both caught off guard when he actually jumps– but the thing is that he accidentally hit you with his arm due to his reflexes and you swear you got a concussion after that

- he LOVES CUDDLES and he loves sniffing you and sometimes hes a sub

- smells like rich cologne that actually smells good

- takes you with him everywhere and he has to be with you all the time or else he'll cry his ass out

- decides to be matrilocal too and take your last name when you get married bc he just loves you so much

- before you guys got together, he was always so stoic and silent. and he's so silent that sometimes he suddenly appears in front of you and talks to you like he didn't just almost make you shit your pants

- he also doesnt switch out his phone so when you're in the year 2024, he still has an iphone 7 that's too big for his hand

- his bff is tendou so he's always at your home too and they're watching a bunch of animes and you're just sitting between wakatoshi's legs like you're his stuffed animal

[phagodyke]

one of my flatmates is soo messy like they're always leaving things unwashed + on surfaces in the kitchen + don't wash/dry stuff properly even when they do + never wipe stuff down even tho they bake a lot n make a lot of mess etc.. grrrrr

[hannieehaee]

can you pls do a ot13 reaction where they both have a crush on each other (y/n and member) so there’s kind of a tension between them ? ^^ thank you so much!!

having a mutual crush on each other

content: implied friendship, mutual crush, some embarrassment lol, etc.

wc: 796

a/n: hope u like it<33 love writing them with a crush its so cute</3

masterlist

seungcheol -

very bashful any time you're alone together. finds it impossible to look into your eyes without shyness overtaking him after finding out his crush was mutual. sometimes he'd have the courage to flirt with you, but he'd usually start blushing when you flirted back. the image of the two of you interacting would be sickening for the members to see as the two of you avoided eye contact and made pathetic attempts at hitting on the other.

jeonghan -

fully aware of your crush and just having fun with the whole 'will they wont they' of it all. will blatantly flirt with you at times or act overly soft at other times in order to make you as aware of his crush as possible. however! he would wait for you to take the first step, simply enjoying being chased after rather than doing the chasing itself.

joshua -

constant suggestive stares and comments that leave you blushy and breathless, making you shy away from even holding eye contact. he gets such a thrill from knowing you like him just as much as he does you, so he always creates this tension that has you looking forward to the next time you interact.

jun -

a little on the shyer side but still makes his crush clear with subtle affections. there's always this very sweet and subtle back and forth between you. not super outwardly spoken but still clear about his intentions through his loaded stares and shy touches of your hand. everyone around is aware and finds your interactions adorable.

soonyoung -

too shy to ever make a move so the only tension between you is him constantly running away from you whenever any sort of allusion towards your or his crush is brought up. cannot physically be in the room any time the two of you are alone because he has no control over his blush or the emptiness of his brain any time he sees himself having to interact with you one on one.

wonwoo -

contrary to popular belief, i think he'd be soooo flirty and engage in back and forth with you any time you interacted. upon realizing his crush was mutual, he'd always be seeking you out, flirting, bantering, and just always making conversation with you to keep himself as a constant presence in your life. sometimes intimate one on one's would even come up between you.

jihoon -

oh god so shy and kept to himself. even though he knows you like him back, he's still unsure on how to proceed, creating an awkward tension whenever he had to take the reigns in the conversation. would depend on you (or maybe the other members) to keep things going or else he'd malfunction.

seokmin -

he'd act just like a friend but in a very charming way, always opening doors for you, holding your hand, giving you friendly affection but with an edge of romance hidden in there. would be so easy for you two to fall into a 'when will they' situation bc everyone knows you're into each other and feeding into it way more than friends would.

mingyu -

constant tension between the two of you lmao. he'd be flirting with you nonstop, feeding into any reaction he got out of you. if you were shy and bashful, he'd flirt even more to get you blushing even more. if you flirted back, he'd match your energy and keep hitting on you until the two of you landed in an even more

minghao -

confident and a little cocky about his crush, always giving you these suggestive looks and soft touches to ensure you're very aware of his feelings for you. lives off your reactions and reciprocations to his affections, creating an intense aura whenever you two were near each other.

seungkwan -

despite his outgoing personality, he's still a little on the shyer side when it comes to expressing his interest in you. will sometimes get a surge of extra confidence and flirt with you, catching you off guard and feeding into a cocky side of himself that only ever came out when he noticed his effect on you.

vernon -

very chill and subtle about his interest but still making it quite obvious. knowing you like him back, he'd occasionally make very direct mentions of his feelings for you, loving how blunt he could be about it as you occasionally responded in a similar manner. would probably wait a while to ask you out officially, enjoying the subtle back and forth.

chan -

even though im a sub!chan and shy!chan enthusiast, i think he'd hit it off with someone he liked very easily. would be easygoing and smooth in showing his interest. would shamelessly flirt with you and always have the perfect response when you'd flirt back.

[yan-lorkai]

Hi!! I loved your hcs of the Octotrio with a yuu that seems to only have a talent in art. I related to it a lot because sometimes I feel like I’m not good at anything else other than drawing.

I was wondering if you could do the same prompt with Riddle, Ace, Deuce, Cater, Leona, Malleus & the Scarabia boys please? If that’s too many you can just do Leona, Malleus, & Scarabia. Thank you 😊

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ A/N: I guess everyone has one of those episodes, huh? I've been writing for more than 8 years now and sometimes I get hit by the "aa but I'm only good at writing, I should totally try something" and then I try something new and hate it bcs I really love to write and nothing can compare lmao. Anyway, I hope you like this darling, I did all the characters requested too btw ~

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Ace would be playful and encouraging, but his competitive nature would lead him to manipulate situations to keep you close. He’d play little tricks to make sure you stay dependent on him, offering "helpful" critiques that subtly undermine your confidence in anything but your art. His lighthearted facade would hide a deeper need to be the center of your attention, he is your muse, the one you use to practice, the who inspires you, making sure that you see him as the only one who truly understands and supports you, all while ensuring you don't realize how he’s subtly sabotaging any other talents you might want to try to explore, for he fears you will not want to spend more time with him anymore if that was the case.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Cater would use his social media prowess to make you art the talk of the school, ensuring your work — and by extension, his support — is always in the spotlight. However, his validation would come with a price, as he subtly isolates you from others, creating an environment where you feel your art is only appreciated by him and his curated audience. Cater’s charming persona would hide his darker intentions, as he manipulates your into believing that your worth is tied to the art you create under his influence, all while keeping you emotionally dependent on his constant praise. You're already good at other things, so surely you don't need to have another hobby, right?

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Deuce, unlike Ace, would be fiercely protective of your artistic talent. He’d encourage your art with an almost desperate intensity, pushing you to try different brushes and pens, different scenarios and things, but he'd also pressure you to stay focused on what your good at, ensuring you don’t waste time on things you never tried before. His possessiveness would manifest in his need to be your protector, to the point where he'd become intimidating towards anyone who tries to steer you away from your art, that does not apply to yourself, while he think your drawings / paintings are very beautiful, he would not force you to make it more if you're having an episode where you doubt your skills and think you are good only on the art field. If you want to explore new things, Deuce will be by your side the entire time.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Riddle would be intensely supportive yet controlling, pushing you to perfect your craft while ensuring you don't stray too far from his strict rules, even more if you are already his lover. His obsession with your success would become borderline suffocating, as he constantly monitors your progress and enforces discipline to keep you on the right path, nurturing your already beautiful talent. To Riddle, your art is flawless, it's personal and have a touch of you in every drawing, be it digital or traditional. When you come to tell him about your doubts, about how you're only good at art, Riddle promptly sooth you with gentle words, albeit he is a little awkward while talking. He offer to teach you about whatever you want to learn but be prepared because he is somewhat a strict teacher.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Leona would admire your dedication to your art, and he would ask questions about it too, learning as much as your interest as possible. However, his possessiveness would be almost primal, keeping you close under the guise of protection, ensuring you don’t waste time on anything — or anyone — else. Leona would be dismissive of your attempts to explore other talents, reinforcing that your art is the only thing that matters. His control would be subtle yet overpowering, as he ensures your world revolves around him and your art, leaving you with little room for anything else.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Malleus would shower you with endless admiration, captivated by your artistic talent, even more if you were influenced by an artistic movement. He'll notice all the little details, the subtle way the traces converge, how the color scheme is perfect, the way the shadows and the light reflect. He is your number 1 fan, so supportive of you. However, his intense fascination would drag you into his lonely world, where your art becomes your only outlet and he is your audience - though he has your drawings framed and hung on the walls of the castles, so everyone can look at it and admire. Malleus may not understand your struggles and why would you want to pursue another hobby, but he can arrange anything you may want to try at least once, from singing and dancing to sewing and knitting, even the art of potion making, archery or fencing. He just know you're going to find something you like as much as your art, and if you are happy so is he.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Jamil would secretly nurture your talent, subtly guiding your creativity while undermining any attempts you make to excel elsewhere, he sees your art as something free and with many meanings - it makes him relaxed in some sort of way and Jamil wants to be a little greedy here, he wants you to continue creating more pieces, always keeping you under his watchful eye as you started drawing / painting. There's just something so intimate, so calming about it he can't wrap his head around. He loves watching you creating your art, feeling is guard lowering just a little. If you ever approach him with your doubts, Jamil take you to the kitchen so he can teach you a few things about cooking. It's a different kind of art but when all is said and done, it's just as good as when you're creating and make you feeling accomplished.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Kalim would be so overwhelmingly supportive and enthusiastic about it, showering you with gifts and opportunities to nurture your artistic talent, buying everything you may need to create your art, a new software? Sure, no problem, he brought the most expensive one too. A few new pencils and pens? Right away. You need more frames and paints? It will be here in a couple of hours. However, his naivety mixed with possessiveness would lead to unintentional control over your life, as he tries to keep you happy and close by his side. Kalim’s well-meaning gestures would create a gilded cage, where your art flourishes but your freedom is slowly stripped away. He would be oblivious to the suffocating effect of his love, believing that as long as you're happy creating art with him, nothing else matters, leaving you feeling trapped and not knowing how to communicate with him. He have done so much for you already!

[crazilust]

My thoughts on these placements

based on my last lover. PSA: this might be biased. don’t take it TOO seriously, it’s mostly for me to purge this relationship. LETS GOOOOOOO !!

1. Gemini rising

Have you ever felt hella special to someone and then you see them interact with someone else and you’re like “oh. i’m… i’m just another one of their friends.” this is what it feels to be around a gemini rising sometimes. most of the ones I know, are either extremely popular, know alot of people or at the very least just hang out regularly with a bunch of people (might just be colleagues and not necessarily friends but they’re often surrounded). And they have this way of making you feel special, and funny and entertaining but most of the times, they’re the ones controlling the discussion and the flow of it.

when it came to my ex, he knew so many people and every person he was interacting with, he knew a little detail about them, and it made the person care so much about him. Even though he didn’t as much. Somewhat flimsy, it’s hard to know a Gemini rising’ true intentions with you.

2. Sagittarius sun

Sags don’t have the best reputation in my book, and he certainly didn’t help the stereotypes. The thing with Sags sun that I find hard to understand is the constant lie they have between who they truly are and who they want to be. It’s a constant battle of “don’t look too hard into my flaws bc soon enough I��ll be this grandiose super star and therefore you can forget about the awkward nerd you have in front of you.” Most of them are nerds, truly. But they hate it. As opposed to Aquarius sun’s desire to be different and their ability to stand on their two feet even tho they’re being outcast, a Sag sun’s deepest fear is to be seen as the weirdo they are. (that unfortunately they associated with being a loser)

If you’ve never been close with a Sag, you’ll be the first to deny this claim. “What?? The Sag I met was THE life of the party! No weirdo here.” or “The Sag I met was a boss ass btch, she had everything under control and very educated!!”

And that, my friends, is what we call a front. Sure, they can be the life of the party, usually very keen on getting their diplomas, but if you don’t know them, that’s the only part of them you’ll get to see cause it’s the part they deem acceptable.

I’m not even gonna comment on the commitment issues, cause yall… you know it already lmao.

3. Virgo moon

Nobody hates an underdeveloped virgo moon more than they hate themselves. So critical, judgemental and harsh. They notice absolutely everything that you do and instead of going to you and confront you about the issue, they’ll keep it in, and throw it back to your face the minute it’s convenient for them (when they effed up). Very hard to love because they simply can’t accept that you love and accept their own flaws. I remember my ex asking me litteraly all the time “How can you love me if I’m not as pretty as before” (it was in his head, he was just as cute) “How can you love me if I don’t have a job?” (He had lost his job for only 2 months at that point) No matter what I’d say, he couldn’t believe that I loved him wholeheartedly, no matter what.

Sometimes, when I look at a virgo moon, unevolved ofc, all I can see is pain. Virgo is an already hard sign to have imo (sorry!) but in the moon placement, it’s just sad. These natives are so harsh on themselves and accept no help whatsoever. And if you do try, they’ll do everything to push you away and trust me, one thing Virgos do is succeed.

4. Libra Mars

As a scorpio mars, libra mars is not my favorite placement. But as I checked my vedic chart and I do, in fact, have a libra mars, I hate that I understand why they act the way they do.

They care so much about everything being perfect, everyone getting along and most importantly being at peace with the ones they love. The cliches are true for a reason, they dislike conflict and yes, are passive agressive but it’s because they don’t want to lose the people they love with petty drama.

So they don’t say anything, and they accomodate even tho that one thing irritated them and then when you confront them about something, they bring you everything you’ve done wrong for the past six months. That’s the part I hate, ofc, but I also hate that I get it.

I get it. They’re the biggest people pleasers and when they don’t say anything about something that upsets them, they actually think they’re doing it for the greater good. They obviously analyse everything you’re doing wrong, but they don’t mind not saying it cause they’d rather be at peace with you. So how dare you don’t do the same for them?

That’s the mentality. Unfortunately for them, it brings bigger conflict because then you feel betrayed they never said anything to begin with. UGH.

SPEAK YOUR MIND, Libras of any placements actually <3

5. Sagittarius Mercury

If you consider yourself soft, delicate, sensitive, do not date a Sag mercury. These people are ruthless. As friends, I find them hilarious and fun to be around, but as lovers I would never do that to myself again. Just never <3. They are very blunt (which doesn’t mean they won’t lie! We’re talking about a Jupiter ruled sign here yall), but in a way that won’t make you feel good about yourself. They’ll often use humour to attack you and then use it as a shield the moment you call them out on it (i.e : It was just a jokeeeeee!)

Gives very good advice, I’ll give them that. I think sometimes I can have a little bit of tunnel vision and with Sag mercuries, they’re able to tap you on the shoulder and be like “Have you consider this tho?” in the most casual way and you’re like “oh.. no. yes. you’re right”

6. Aquarius Venus

If you love the friends to lovers trope, you’ll just love dating an Aquarius venus because that friendship-like relationship will be the foundation of your dynamic. Everything feels fun, the complicity is at an all time high.

But the commitment.

Now, I’ve read multiple times here that Aquarius venus is actually very committed to the person they love when they like you. Well, I guess I wasn’t his person cause I only felt the commitment phobia.

Anyways, I still loved the dynamic of the relationship, but I can’t lie, it didn’t feel serious at all.

•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~••~•~•~•~•~•

Well that’s all for me, today. Love yall!!

Remember, these are the big 6 of my ex so it is biased nothing to take too personal but if it applies and resonates, great💛

B.

[miniwheat77]

Awkward. (Gaz x Reader.)

!CW! NSFW, Smut, Virgin!reader, p in v sex, virginity loss, unprotected sex, awkward reader, mentions of reader being picky, violence, sorry if I missed any. This sat in my drafts forever lmao

(Lmao, it’s my time to shine bc I’m the most awkward bitch you’ll ever meet.)

Your face contorts in disgust as you look upon the contents of the MRE, you hated it. You’re carrying more than you should, trying to get to the mess hall. You lay them out on the countertop, going and sitting down. Pretty much the only thing you liked in this were the crackers. Soap sits down at your table, smile growing at his lips as he sees you eating the crackers. “Gross again?” He asks. “Always.” You mumble. When everyone else sits down at the table, you stand up to go get a water and Soap chuckles. “What’s funny?” Gaz asks. “She’s so awkward.” He mumbles. “Yeah, but she’s funny.” He shrugs. “Yeah, I like that she knows how awkward she is.”

“Do you remember when Captain Price put her on the spot in a meeting? She wanted to ring his neck.” Gaz laughs. Soap laughs too. “I don’t know, her awkwardness is cute.” Gaz shrugs. “Yeah it is, she just seems so…”

“Innocent? Oblivious? Yeah.”

You make your way back to the table, water bottle and crackers in hand. “You want my crackers too?” Gaz asks. “No, the smell of sin is making me nauseous,” you groan. “Sin?” Soap asks. “Yeah, the smell of whatever the fuck they put in those MRE’s is sin. You can’t change my mind.” You laugh. Gaz shakes his head. “How are you so picky?” He smiles. “Because, I hate everything.” You mumble. “Jeez, so uptight.” Soap mumbles. “Need to get laid little lady.” Soap tosses a packet of crackers your way, laughing as your cheeks heat up. You’re embarrassed and he can tell he’s struck a nerve. “Let’s not talk about who needs to get laid. You’re so touch starved, anything even mildly shaped like a woman turns you on.” You roll your eyes. “Hey, I never denied it.” He smiles. “Yeah, don’t go too crazy on the training mannequins.” You smirk, earning an eye roll from him.

—

“Hey Y/N.” Gaz smiles. You’re not expecting him and he startles you. You jump slightly, knocking over your capless water bottle and scrambling to pick it back up. “Oh shit!” You gasp. You stand up, trying to brush the water from your shirt. “H-hey Gaz. What’s up?” You ask. You hope he won’t be able to see your bright red cheeks but he can. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” He chuckles. He passes you a few napkins from a table next to you. “I was wondering if you’d be my spotter tomorrow morning when I work out. Soap usually does it but he’s not feeling very good.” He says. “Uh.. yeah sure- yeah.” You laugh awkwardly.

He reaches out, taking the cap to your water bottle and screwing it on before setting it back down. “Thank you.” You blush. He smiles.

Captain Price chuckles when Gaz comes back toward him. “For how awkward she is, she’s a real good soldier.” He laughs. “Yeah, it’s odd.” Gaz smiles. “She seems more awkward around you.” Captain Price points out. “You think so?” Gaz looks at him. “Yeah, maybe she has a crush on you.” Captain Price laughs. “I doubt it.”

—

“I’m going to scrape my eyes out with my fingernails.” You groan. “Y/N, you’re going to be fine.” Soap chuckles. “No, no I’m not, I hate this.” You sigh. “Why? What’s so bad?” He asks. “Soap. I joined the military, not the fucking royal family. I hate dresses. I hate dressing up.” You groan, tugging the dress down your thighs. You had to borrow it from another girl on base. “Plus this dress barely covers my ass.” You groan. “Yeah. You look a lot different.” He laughs. “Different how?” You ask. “Hey guys.” Gaz smiles. He’s dressed up really nice as well. “Hey. And also, you look like a girly girl.” Soap laughs. You roll your eyes. “Y/N is complaining once again.” Soap looks at Gaz. “Isn’t she always.” He sends you a wink, and you try to ignore it. “Yeah, because this is misery. I don’t wear dresses.” You groan. Gaz smiles. “You look really good though.” He smiles. “Liar.” You mumble. “I’m gonna go get wine drunk and try to pretend this night never happened.” You groan.

“Wonder why she’s so awkward.” Soap laughs. “I don’t know.” Gaz shrugs.

A few hours later, you’re a little tipsy. Captain Price has made a toast, he’s thanked everyone, you’ve met family members of fellow soldiers. It’s pretty fun even though you hate the way you’re dressed. You’re tipsy, sitting back in your chair. Smiling lightly at the story Gaz is telling. You really love them. They’re like your best friends. “You okay?” Gaz looks at you. You nod your head. “Just listening.” You smile. Something about the half-tipsy half-lazy smile you give him, sparks shoot right through him, chills going down his spine. He tries to shrug these feelings off. “You don’t seem as awkward when you’re drinking.” He laughs. “Liquid courage.” You smile, raising up the glass of wine. He smiles. “Alright, time for some fun.” Soap rubs his hands together. “You should tell us something cool about you.” He smiles. “Soap, she’s been drinking.” Gaz rolls his eyes. “So? She’d do it to me.” He laughs. “What do you want to know?” You look up at him, bringing your legs up onto the chair. “Why didn’t any of your family come here?” Soap asks. “Ah, I didn’t tell them about it.” You laugh. “Why not?”

You shrug. “They’re just.. it’s a long ways for them to come and I didn’t want to be disappointed when they told me they couldn’t make it.” You laugh. “Your boyfriend isn’t going to come?” He asks. You smile. “Boyfriend?” You giggle. “Yeah.”

“I don’t have a boyfriend. Never have.” Soap tilts his head. “What?” You giggle again. “Not exactly the dating type.” You roll your eyes. “So..” Gaz swallows a little harder than he intends. “How does that work? Like friends with benefits because you don’t date or..” this makes you laugh. Taking him off guard. “Oh god no. I’m too awkward for that.” Gaz and Soap exchange glances. “So.. have you never…” Soap trails off. “What?” You ask. “Have I ever had sex? No.” You roll your eyes. Taking another drink of wine. Gaz’s eyes widen. Soap and him exchanging glances. “Why not?” You raise an eyebrow. “Have you seen me?” You giggle. “If I have a crush on somebody, I keep that to myself. I am so awkward if anybody ever found out I liked them, I’d die of embarrassment.” You smile. “Huh. Do you like anybody on the task force?” He asks. Your cheeks turn a bright shade of red. “Oh you doooo. Who is it?”

“None of your business.” You roll your eyes. “We’ll find out sooner or later.” He smiles. You roll your eyes. “I’ll take it to my grave thank you very much.” You chuckle. You stand up. “I’m calling it a night,” you mumble. “Yeah, I’m going to go see what Simon is doing.” Soap stands up, walking off. “You need me to walk you back to your room?” Gaz asks. You smile. “You can if you want.” He stands up, pushing his chair in and walking along with you. Gaz liked you. He got along with you pretty well. He thought your awkwardness was funny and cute. He’s got his hands in his pockets as he walks beside you. “So.. where did the awkwardness start?” He asks. “I don’t know, it’s been that way forever.” You laugh. He nods his head. He’s smiling. When he reaches your room, he says his goodbyes, and for once you’re not too awkward, the wine most likely. Once he finishes up his goodbyes, he goes on to his own room.

The following morning, you’re a little hung over. But nonetheless you make your way out into the mess hall. “Ah. There she is.” Soap smirks. “What?” You mumble. “I don’t see any hickeys or bruises.” He crosses his arms. “What are you talking about?” You’re getting nervous. “We saw you and Garrick leaving together last night. Thought maybe you gave up your v-card.” He smiles. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, I don’t even remember last night.” Your cheeks are burning and you’re avoiding his gaze. “I forgot my belt.” You mumble, disappearing back down the hallway you came from. You rush down the corridor until you meet Gaz’s door. You knock a couple times before walking straight in. “Woah-“ he mumbles, spinning around. He’s just now getting dressed. He doesn’t have a shirt on and his pants are still unbuttoned. “Sorry- I just- did something happen last night?” You mumble. “What do you mean?” He asks. “I just.. Soap said he saw us leave together and I don’t remember anything- did- oh god.” You mumble.

“Did we have sex?” He asks as he crosses his arms. Your face is beat red and you look frustrated. “No. We didn’t have sex.” He laughs. “Oh thank god.” You mumble. “I- I mean. I didn’t mean it like that. I meant.. It’s not that I don’t want to have sex with you- I- just-“ your eyes are wide as the words leave your lips. He’s smirking at you, taking a step closer. Arms crossed over his chest. Your lips are parted, still in shock at what you’ve just admitted. The only thing you can think to do is leave. Hearing his laughter as you leave, closing the door behind you.

“Stupid- stupid.” You mumble, pacing back and fourth in your room. How the hell were you supposed to go out there after that? After admitting to him that you wanted to have sex with him? You chewed at your lip nervously. You hear your Captain call over the radio that everyone needed to meet in the mess hall. You groan in frustration. You make your way outside, staying completely emotionless as you make your way outside. You sit down at the table you usually sit at, looking over a magazine. You can feel eyes burning into you and you know for sure it’s Soap and Gaz. “We’re leaving on a mission in 15, make sure you have absolutely everything you need. This is an important mission.”

—

Gaz of course sat right next to you for the entire ride to the zone. “Y/N? Everything okay?” Soap asks, he’s got a smirk on his face. “Fine, just nervous.” You mumble. “Because Gaz is sitting next to you?” He teases. “Ha ha ha.” You roll your eyes. “Because we’re about to kill a bunch of assholes and put our lives on the line.” You mumble. “I didn’t think you still got nervous on these.”

He’s caught you in a lie. “Yeah well.. whatever.” You mumble. “You don’t do very good under pressure.”

“No I don’t, I lash out and get violent, why do you think I’m in the military.” You smile. He laughs. “I’m just pulling your leg. But ay, after the mission maybe if you ask him politely enough, Gaz will hit it again.” A snort leaves your lips. You roll your eyes. “After this mission maybe if you’re still alive, I’ll ring your neck and the enemy won’t have to.” You glare. Gaz places his hand on your thigh, your body going rigid immediately. “Relax, he’s just talking shit. It’s what he’s good at.” Soap notices the way you tense up, seeing you staring down at Kyle’s hand. You clamp your thighs together immediately. Hands clutching at the bench until your knuckles turn white. You’ve clearly got a crush. Soap shakes his head, smiling to himself. You’re so obvious.

The helicopter lands and everyone files out, taking direct orders from Captain Price and Ghost. Your demeanor changes from that of awkwardness to stealth. There’s no time for playing games, only time for war. “This is Capture or kill. We need the intel inside.” Ghost says to everyone. “We’re moving slow, staying with a partner. Keep focused.” He helps guide everyone and eventually everyone is splitting into groups.

“You know it’s you who she has a crush on, right?” Soap mumbles to Gaz. “I know.” He laughs. They’re taking post up in a building and watching over everyone below. “She came into my room this morning because she didn’t remember anything that happened last night-“ he pauses, taking a shot and hitting an enemy below. “Incriminated herself pretty bad, that’s why she’s so frustrated and snappy.” He smiles, one eye closed as he watches the area below. “You know if you fuck her the attitude will go away right?” Soap chuckles. Gaz rolls his eyes. “I know. Just waiting until the time is right.” He pulls the trigger again. Soap smiles. “Woah, what’s going on?” Soap calls into his radio. He sees you burst out of a building, firing your gun rapidly into the door. You’re limping. “They’ve got Myles inside.” He can hear you groan into the radio. “I’ve got him, just give me a minute.” You empty another full magazine into the bulky door. Kicking it open despite your injury. Gaz has moved his attention to you as well for backup. They hear more gunfire, your radio must’ve been damaged because they can hear everything but it’s a little muffled.

When you reappear you’re dragging the sergeant out and wrapping your shirt over his wound. “Think his femoral artery was grazed, he’s bleeding bad.”

“I’ll get medical out.” Ghost says into the radio.

“Just keep him safe.”

“No worries here.”

All you’ve got on now is a tank top and your vest. You’d used your shirt to bandage his wound. You’re kneeling by the edge of the brick wall, gun close in your hand as you wait patiently. “Lookin good Y/N.” Gaz mumbles into the radio. He just knows you’ve rolled your eyes at him. “Eyes on target Garrick.” You groan. You pass a water bottle to the injured man laying up against the wall.

“I’m gonna go help her out. You got it?” Gaz says to Soap nods his head. “Go help your girl, Garrick.” He chuckles, Gaz makes his way down the stairs in the watch tower, creeping his way over to you. Soap watches him close in on you. “Let’s carry him out. Medivac will be around where we came in.” You nod your head, picking up the man and helping Gaz carrying him out. Once he’s safe, you’re both waiting with him to keep him safe.

—

The mission was overall a success and once you’ve been bandaged up, you’re limping your way around the base. You’re getting a lot of stares because you aren’t wearing your normal attire. All you’ve got on now are some shorts and a t-shirt. You’re making your way back to your room with an MRE when Gaz approaches you. “Hey. I got you something.” He smiles. You look at him in confusion. “Can I come in?” He asks. You nod your head, pushing your door open and letting him in. He sits down on your bed, sliding an MRE from behind his back. “Here.” He holds it out, seeing your eyes light up. “No way! How did you get it?” You smile. “Found it when I was snooping through some stuff. Saved it for you.” He smiles. “Thank you Gaz.”

What he’s given you is the only kind of MRE you won’t complain about. “You did good out there today. Hope you didn’t get hurt too bad.” He smiles. “Oh no.. just tore a muscle I think.” You mumble. You clear your throat. “Look um.. about this morning.” You mumble. He laughs, looking down. “I.. I totally messed up what I was going to say. I just.. I don’t think that you would take advantage of me or anything- oh god I’m rambling.” You groan. He’s smiling at you as you fall further into the hole you’ve dug for yourself. He takes a step toward you, and you step back. You don’t even realize you do it, it’s how you react by nature. “It’s not that I wouldn’t want to-“

“Y/N.” He interrupts you. “Yeah?”

He cuts you off by kissing you, and he can feel your body tense up. Your eyes screw shut and it takes you a second before you kiss back. But when you do, he deepens the kiss, pushing you back into the wall behind you. A hiss leaves your lips when you step wrong and he smiles into your lips. “Sorry love.” He mumbles, pulling away. “It’s okay.” You mumble. Your lips are plump from his, slightly pinker than before. Your pupils are blown out. It’s quite the look on you. He likes it. He leans in and kisses you once more, feeling you melt into him. Giving into him completely. He glides his hand up onto your hip. Feeling you tense up into him. He takes your bottom lip between his teeth, he's showing you that he wants to take this further.

Your brain is a scrambled mess when he pulls away. Staring up at him as he smiles down at you. He licks his lips, taking in a deep breath. You're breathing so hard and he can't help but chuckle at you. "Hey. Relax." He rests his forearm on the wall above you. Pinning you into the wall. He's clearly overwhelming you, but he likes seeing how flustered you are. "You okay?" He asks. "Yes. Just.. feel weird." You breathe. "What, here?" He glides his fingertips over your clothed opening, feeling you jump away from his touch. He smiles at the way you shutter from it. A taunting laugh leaves his lips. You take in a deep breath, grasping his wrist. “Kyle..” the breathlessness is your voice shows him just how needy you are. You glance up at him. He leans into you. Lips right by yours once more. “You can stop me you know?” He breathes. Fingertips returning to your clothed opening. He rubs gentle circles over you. You pant, but you don’t move away from him. You close your eyes, taking in a breath. Pushing your hips into his hand. He smiles at this. You really want him this bad. He presses his lips to yours, putting a bit more pressure against you. He presses a kiss the corner of your lips, moving down to your neck. Sucking gently at the skin and nipping at you. You’re getting more and more needy as he touches you. The awkwardness slowly slipping away.

When he pulls away from you, he can’t help but smile. You’re a mess. “You look good like this.” He bites his lip.

“So.. do you really want to have sex with me, or were you just saying that?” He teases. “Yeah- yes. I do want to have sex with you.” You breathe. “Oh, those are fighting words sweetheart.” He smiles. “I’m serious.” You breathe. “I want you.” His smile starts to fade away, a laugh leaving his lips. He grasps the hem of his shirt, tugging it over his head. He reaches out, grasping your shirt and pulling it over your head, attaching his lips to yours again. Your cheeks are hot and he can tell you’re nervous.

Gaz isn’t usually one to take control like this but he knows you’re too nervous to.

And he can see that it’s working. “There’s no rush sweetheart. No need to be so nervous. If I do anything you don’t like, you can stop me.” He mutters the words right near your ear and you can feel the deep darkness of lust swallowing you up. How even when he’s got you right in the palm of his hand he’s still reassuring you, proving further the kind of man he is. He lowers his hand between your legs once more, gliding his fingertips over your opening. His light touch sends chills up your spine. The pleasure wraps itself around your spinal cord, you can feel yourself stiffening up at his touch. “Like it baby?” He breathes. You nod your head. “Yes.” You whine. He applies a little more pressure, circling right over your bundle of nerves and even through the fabric, his hands on you makes it more intense than it’s ever felt.

He’s just about to close the deal, but a knock at your door draws his away from you. “Fuck.” He groans. “Yeah?” You call. “Just checking on you, everything okay?” You hear your captain call through the door. “Yeah, I’m alright. Just sore.” You breathe. Gaz smirks as he watches you.

“Hope you’re not harassing her, Garrick.” Your cheeks turn a shade of crimson. “Just keeping her company old man, making sure she takes care of herself.”

You hear him laugh, his footsteps fading away. “Guess I should leave you alone before he comes back, hm?” Gaz laughs, moving closer to you and lifting his shirt up off of the floor, handing out yours as he does. He slips it back over himself. “I’ll be back.” Gaz laughs. He steps away from you. Because he knows if he doesn’t he’ll fuck you hard enough for the entire base to hear.

And he can’t have that.

—

“She’s a fucking brick of a woman.” He hears Soap laugh. “What makes you say that?” Gaz asks, turning away from his scope to look at Johnny.

“Because, last mission she drug a 6’2 200 pound man no problem. This time, maybe you should see for yourself.” He nods over. “Swap me.” He raises his sniper up, swapping with Soap. He lines up his scope, seeing you. You and Ghost are sneaking into the building, you’re clearing out the outside. They allegedly have hostages and you don’t need any murder suicides on your hands. So you’re taking it slow.

The men in this compound are fucking massive and Gaz watches you move up on each one of them. Taking them down with ease. “She is insane on the field.” Gaz laughs. He notices you struggling with one of them, lining up a shot. He’s worried for a second since the man gets himself on top of you, taking a swing at you. Gaz flinches as he connects with your face. But one hard kick to the chest has him flying back. You pin him down, knee right to his chest to restrict him. You draw back, fist knocking into his jaw, laying the man out cold. You reach into your side, raising your hand with a knife and bringing it down to his throat.

“You good Y/N? That was a hell of a hit.” Gaz asks. “What happened?” Soap asks.

“Nah, I’m good.” You sit up. Soap makes his way over, as Ghost is already inside and he can no longer see him. He notices through his scope that you’ve got blood rushing down your nose from where the man hit you. “He hit her fucking hard.” Gaz cringes. “Ah, she’s alright. I’ve seen her get hit way harder and not even flinch.” Soap mumbles. “Doesn’t look like it, Lass. You need help?” Soap asks. He hears you snort.

“I’ve fallen off of buildings, been blown up, have had more concussions than I can count on one hand and have enough shrapnel in my body for the 2 of you combined. I’m good.” You laugh.

“This is the military, not a walk in the park. One asshole hitting me is the least of my worries.” You mumble, walking up behind a man and stabbing him right in the throat.

“All clear on my end.” You call.

“Mine too. Hostages have to be somewhere else because they aren’t here.” Ghost calls back. “Watch for stragglers, I’m about to arm the bomb. After that we’ve got exactly three minutes to blow this popsicle stand.” You mumble. They watch you messing with something for a minute. “Armed. Get out of here!” You call.

Gaz and Soap arrive first. You close after, and than Ghost saunters up last. The building and everything inside explodes behind the four of you and you smile as the flames roar up. “I see what they were talking about.” Ghost laughs. “Looks like that bastard packed a punch.” He nudges you, seeing you smile. “Yeah well. He’s in the flames and I’m not so. I punch harder.” You laugh, walking up the ramp, into the helo. The three men follow you inside.

“Look, all I’m saying is, you better make a move before I do.”

Gaz rolls his eyes at Soap. “She’s off limits and you know it.” He laughs. It’s dinner time and you’re getting cleaned up. “Don’t get me wrong she’s awkward as hell but how badass she is just… had me rockin a semi through the entire mission.” Soap laughs. Gaz scrunches his face up. “Gross.”

“I’m serious Gaz. You better get in there and pop that-“

“Please don’t say Cherry.” You groan, making them turn toward you, eyes wide. Ghost laughs harder than he should at their shocked faces, caught red handed.

You sit down. “You good?” Gaz asks. “Yeah. Fucker broke my nose so they had to crack it back into place and pack it.” You groan. They can tell by the already forming bruising under your eyes that you’re probably hurting. You sit down, leaning back into your chair. “So. Other than Gaz ‘popping my cherry.’ What’s new?” You smirk, crossing your arms. Gaz and Soap can’t hide their pink cheeks. “Ah, Laswell has an idea of where the hostages are.” Ghost nods. “Cool, when do we fly out?”

He laughs. “No, you have healing to do and Garrick has to do his yearly physical tomorrow before he can go back out on the field.” Ghost takes a bite of the sandwich he’s eating. Mask still down around his nose. “No way, it’s a broken nose not a cracked femur. I’m fine.”

Ghost laughs. “Captains orders Y/N.”

You groan out.

—

The next day, you’re getting coffee in the mess hall. It’s quiet on base since there’s no one else here. They left a few minutes ago, leaving you alone. Gaz had his physical about an hour ago and sometimes they take a little longer than that. You head back to your room, opening up the door and stepping inside. You close your door behind you. Just as you’re about to raise the cup to your lips, you see Gaz sitting on your bed.

“Oh dear.” You mumble. He laughs. Standing up. “Don’t sound so excited to see me princess.” He smiles. You narrow your eyes. “Do not call me that.”

He raises his hands up in surrender. “Sorry baby, don’t stab me.” He smirks. Seeing your cheeks turn pink. He sits back down, spreading his legs slightly. Leaning back onto his hands. “I swear you look so sexy on the field. Get me so riled up watching you.” He smirks. Resting his hand over his jeans.

You set your cup down, crossing your arms. “What are you doing, Garrick?”

“Gonna finish what I started.” He breathes. He stands up, seeing your eyes rush to the ground. He knows you don’t do too well under pressure. Attention on you makes you nervous. He closes the distance between the two of you and lifts your chin up with his fingers. “You’re so pretty.”

You laugh, rolling your eyes. “Quit bullshitting Kyle, I look like I’ve got too much eye black on.” You laugh. He smiles. “Oh come on. Give yourself a break. You took a fucking hit.”

He moves closer, grasping your thighs and lifting you up, you gasp out as he pushes you back into the wall, his hips pressed up against yours. “Took it like a fucking champ.” He breathes. You can feel how hard he is against you. Not being able to control yourself as you let out a whine as he attacks your neck. He ruts his hips into yours and you gasp out. “Oh fuck-“ you gasp. Clutching onto his shirt. “Gaz…” you breathe. “What if someone hears?” You’re breathless and he gets even harder at the sound of desperation in your voice. “Only others here are training newbies. Nobody will hear baby.” He lowers his head to the crook of your neck, attacking your skin with his lips and teeth. Drawing his tongue over your pulse. You let out a deep breath, feeling him smile into your skin. He steps to the side, and you latch onto him like he’s going to drop you. No longer using the wall as support.

“Relax.” He smiles. “M’not gonna drop you.” He laughs, moving to the edge of the bed and laying you down on it. “You think you can stay quiet for me?” He asks. You look up at him, cheeks blushing. You nod your head. “Good girl.” He lowers himself slightly. Grasping your thighs and pulling you to the edge of the small cot with ease. He can hear your heart thumping in your chest from where he’s at. He reaches for your pants. Despite doing nothing you had still at least put on your uniform. He unbuttons them, tugging them down your thighs. Noticing the way you clench your thighs together the moment you’re exposed. You swallow hard. Hearing him chuckle. “You have to trust me.” He takes in a deep breath. Pushing your thighs open slightly. You’ve still got panties on.

You gulp, and his expression changes. He’s not playful anymore, he sees something he wants and he’s going to take it.

He grasps the hem of them, pulling them down your legs and discarding them along with your pants. Moving himself closer. He’s on his knees on the ground, at the edge of the bed. He’s got you pulled right up to the edge of it. Pushing your legs open. You swallow hard, avoiding eye contact with him. A gasp leaves your lips as he kisses down your thigh, moving closer to where you’re exposed to him. “Remember.. try to stay quiet for me.” He looks up at you, seeing you nod your head. He can still hear your heart thumping in your chest. When he kisses your opening your hips jump slightly, but he doesn’t waste a second to draw his tongue up your slit. When he starts to flick his tongue over you, sucking at your clit, your thighs start to shake.

You realize the situation you’ve gotten yourself into.

You grip the sheets, teeth gritted behind tight lips.

“Oh fuck..” your voice is soft and it’s just above a whisper. Low enough to where only he could hear it. He smiles into you. Knowing you like it only eggs him on. He’s hard, throbbing in his jeans. He’s turned on and all he wants to do is bury himself into you. But he knows you’re not ready for that just yet. He needs to open you up first. He keeps lapping at your clit, circling your opening with one of his fingers.

He doesn’t give you too much time to adjust before he’s sliding one of them into you. A gasp gets caught in your throat at the intrusion, how good he’s making you feel. It’s overwhelming and you can already feel it building in your lower stomach.

It approaches slow until he adds a second finger, pumping them into you, still tonguing your clit. Your thighs shake and he can tell you’re getting close. Sending you spiraling right into that sweet release. “Kyle-“ you whine. He laughs at how much your voice has changed. Your apprehension is gone, all that’s left is want. And you fucking want it.

Just when he’s about to give it to you, he pulls away. He can see tears gather at your waterline, frustration clouds your eyes. “If I make you cum, you’ll be too sensitive baby. You’re not ready for it yet.” You nod your head, but you want more. He can tell you’re trying to be patient despite how bad you want it. He stands up and unbuckles his belt. You swallow hard. When he exposes himself to you, you realize it’s going to hurt compared to his fingers. “Relax. You’re ready.” He breathes, moving himself between your legs. He kisses you, teasing your clit with the tip of his cock. You whine into his lips. The thought of him filling you up is like a dream.

He gathers your arousal on his tip and lines himself up with your entrance, pushing into you slow. You take a deep breath. “O-oh god.” You hesitate. It stings as he glides between your walls, stretching you further than you’ve ever been stretched before. You clench your eyes closed, hissing as he moves deeper.

“It’s okay. You’re doing so good.” He breathes. “S-so good for me.”

The tightness of you around him makes him shudder. “Shit.” He whines. You’ve never heard him like this. “You feel so fucking good.” He shakes his head. He’s got his eyes closed too. You wrap your legs around him and force him deeper, his eyes widening. “Shit!” He breathes. “Please-“ you mewl.

“Fuck- I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Please just, fuck me.” You look up at him. Eyes full of need. He holds onto your thighs, “just.. try to stay quiet. M’gonna be kinda rough baby.” You nod your head.

He takes a couple slow, deep thrusts. Until you’re shivering. You want more and he’s going to give it to you.

He takes a hard thrust, watching your lips part. Your mouth opens slightly. He raises your hips, sliding a pillow underneath you. He angles your hips up perfectly and when he buries himself into you, he drives himself right into that spot inside of you. You clamp a hand over your own mouth and he can’t help but laugh. He seems to know exactly what it takes to make you feel good. He keeps his bruising pace, giving you exactly what you’ve asked for. Even when he notices tears streaming from your eyes, he keeps going. He pins your wrists above your head, pressing his lips to yours. His tongue moves against yours and he tugs your bottom lip between his teeth, and you’re almost a goner. You’re not going to last long.

Your skin is flushed and warm. Your eyes look up at him lazily, you’re in another world as he works his hips into yours. You’re relaxed now, desperate for that high you know is coming quick. You struggle to keep your eyes open, trying hard to stay still but your body twitches as you get closer. Your thighs shake slightly but he keeps them open. You’re milking his cock. Tight and wet around him. He can barely take it, his breathing is starting to get uneven and his thrusts are getting sloppy. You’re both right up to the brink. You prop yourself up onto your elbows, looking up at him. Your eyes are dark, that lustful gaze nearly sends him right into his orgasm. “Kyle…” you breathe. “Y-yeah?”

“Want you to cum in me.” You breathe, looking up at him through your eyelashes. “I want to know what it feels like..”

“Shit- you didn’t have to ask.” He pushes you back, resting a bit of his weight on you as he rocks his hips into you. “I’m so close.” You mewl. “I know baby. Can feel you tightening around me.” He growls.

It only takes a couple more thrusts and he can tell by the cry you let out behind your own hand that you’re right there. “That’s right sweetheart, give it to me.” He breathes. “I’m gonna cum too- gonna fill this pretty pussy.” He grits his teeth. You cry out, and he doesn’t care who hears. He can feel you throbbing around him. Last minute, he pushes one of your thighs up, sliding even deeper. He intensifies your orgasm and clamps a hand over your mouth so that nobody can hear your cries. He bites his lip hard as he cums, cock twitching, his body tensing up. It’s by far the hardest he’s ever cum, chills rising up his spine. He relaxes into you. Breathing heavy as he comes down his high. You can hear his heart beating hard in his chest, blush rising up your cheeks at what you’ve just done.

He pulls out of you, zeroing in on the way his filth spills back out of you. He has to fight himself from getting hard again, knowing you’re probably sore. He stands up, adjusting his jeans. He notices the way you get uncomfortable at him redressing himself, probably worried about him leaving. You sit up and make a move to go clean yourself up but he stops you, smiling. “You’re so fucking awkward and it’s so cute.” He laughs. You roll your eyes. He sits down next to you, pinching your chin and turning your head to make you kiss him.

“You gonna leave me hanging hm?” He smiles. “What do you mean?”

“I just.. I didn’t really want this to be a one time thing. You gonna leave me here alone?” He laughs. You look down. “No.. I.. I wouldn’t do that to you I just.. no I didn’t want it to be a one time thing either, I’m sorry if-“ he kisses you again. Gripping your shirt tight in his hands. “Relax sweetheart.” He toys with your collar. “You’re mine and I think I’ve made that clear, right babe?” He smiles. Seeing crimson creep up your cheeks. “Go get cleaned up, I’ll go grab an ice pack for your face yeah?” He breathes. “Maybe we can sneak off base and go get something other than MRE’s to eat.”

“Kyle Garrick you’ve won my heart.” You laugh. “You’re so picky.” He rolls his eyes.

“You said it yourself, MRE’s suck!”

He shakes his head at you, seeing you disappear into the bathroom. He hopes whatever this is, doesn’t end anytime soon.

[whorefortheevans]

How The Evans React to you Having an Anxiety Attack

Since im having an anxiety attack rn i thought this would be a good way to get a quick post out lmfao

CW: not proofread, all lowercase, anxiety

Tate

tate's always with you, even if you cant see him

he also cares more about you than he has anyone else, so as soon as you start showing signs of anxiety, he knows right away

watches you like a hawk

the second your leg starts to bounce and your breathing becomes shallow, he walks right over to you

he's not great at talking through emotions, but he lays with you and lets you rest your head on his chest

wraps his arms around you tightly

kisses the top of your head

if you cry it'll make him cry too lmao

Kyle

if you're with him at the frat house, he'll take you upstairs to his room away from everyone else

if you're not with him, he answers your call at the first ring and will drive over to you even if its 3 in the morning

kyle is super emotionally available so its really easy to talk to him about what's making you anxious

he's very affectionate

rubs your arms, legs, and back

talks you through your anxiety and gets you a glass of water

i feel like he would be big on journaling, so he would buy you a little journal for when you get too anxious

Jimmy

i don't think jimmy is very familiar with what anxiety is

given the time period, jimmy thinks anyone with anxiety was automatically admitted to mental hospitals, so you had to explain to him what general anxiety is

he still didn't completely understand it, but he tries to be there for you when you get anxious

he sits with you and lets you talk

usually doesn't have much to say, so he just gives you lots of hugs

he offers to go on walks around the camp with you

sometimes he'll put you on the back of his motorcycle and drive you into town to help clear your mind

Pre-cult!Kai

kai's parents definitely didn't talk to him about mental health

so when you start getting anxious, he kind of freaks out thinking something is seriously wrong with you

he feels a little awkward talking about feelings, but he listens to you anyway

will awkwardly put his arm around you hoping its enough

he uses his free hand to send an SOS text to winter

Kai

i hate to say this bc i love him...but blue-haired kai would not put time into talking you through an anxiety attack

he would tell you to skip that day's meeting so you weren't a distraction to anyone

he lets you stay in his bed and checks up on you every now and then

if you want to talk with him, just forget about it because if you even start to explain to him what's bothering you he'll leave immediately

he might ask winter to spend some time with you so you're not completely alone

if he's in a good mood after his meeting, he'll sit with you in his bed and offer to get you food or water

[weebsinstash]

Ok but fuck the people who mentioned abo stuff and omega Miguel to me specifically because I'm over here trying to think of-of- of other ideas that have some meat in them and now I'm just thinking about him becoming absolutely baby crazy in the freaky primal way only omegaverse shit can provide

-normal ass Reader meeting ABO people in the Spider Society and you have no idea what the actual hell any of them are talking about half the time but wouldn't it suck if you still felt some sort of effects from them and affected them too. But. Alpha Miguel obviously 🤌 somehow you make him purr however briefly bc he'd probably get embarrassed and be a dork but you just hear that motor kick in and it's like '👀 oh yall ain't HUMAN human? Idk that's kinda scary but... hot too'. Next thing you know you're finding out about Alphas having knots and you're having inappropriate thoughts about your boss. Also, what if scenting isn't just rubbing necks and such, what if it could be done from smaller touches too, so, suddenly you're sitting there "oh was he scenting me when he touched me on the shoulder" and you may or may not remember how people would often be nervous or avoid you on those days, or be polite but servile, one could day non-threatening, no competition

Alpha Miguel hearing you don't want kids like "I can fix them uwu". One day you realize "oh is he like, courting me" and you're confronted with the terrifying mortality of "holy shit does he want to date/have babies, idk if im ready for something that serious 😳" and also just, him having all these biological advantages over you like he eventually figures out how to tell your emotions by your scent and things like that, you hug the wrong person and suddenly he's in a foul mood and "wanting to speak to them" because their scent transferred onto you

-normal Miguel finding out about an Omega Reader and "no, I'm just studying them for science though--" *suddenly has terabytes of notes about you, your biological aspects, info from your home dimension about Omegas, plenty of personally written 'research notes'* he's just utterly obsessed and fascinated. He learns you're just basically a guaranteed baby machine amd suddenly he's astral projecting himself into another reality, man reads a factoid on how Omega typically have 3 or even more babies and he's sitting there thinking about the two of you with four daughters. Maaaaybe one son but, he loves the idea of all girls, he's just baby crazy for a daughter specifically and he's like "but wait, I could have multiple". But papi, four quinces sounds expensive lmao, lucky he's got that CEO money

-But of course, I'm growing especially fonder of female Alpha Reader and Omega Miguel and like. You're both kind of socially awkward and feel 'out of place', and being atrracted to each other is weird because you both lowkey hate yourselves and aren't sure how you two would work out. What does it mean for you to be an Alpha? Isn't he more dominant than you? Should he... act more submsisive towards you, like, you're both so confused and not sure how to act and also kind of being social recluses. One day you have your whole aha moment where you realize it's kind of a perspective thing and suddenly you cant thinking about him holding a chunky little newborn or having a tea party with his daughters and how, oh wouldn't he be so cute with a baby on his hip

Alpha Reader "I want to see him holding my babies and i wanna love n support him" vs Omega Miguel "I want to cuddle and kiss her while she carries our babies and protect her and love her 🥰" like fjfjff the nuance is THERE

-then there's the juicy idea or "alpha Miguel from a dimension without really any Omegas meeting an Omega Reader for the first time" and he's just kind of head over heels for you (and so is everyone else really). He starts realizing how powerful your "abilities" are when one day you're called into his office to see him throwing things around and shouting about "another hole in the multiverse" and Peter B is like silently begging for you to try and calm him down and you just. Panic and hug him! And you're hugging him and he can get a whiff of your scent and you hit him with the boo boo eyes "It'll be ok, please don't be so stressed 🥺 I'm sure we can figure something out. You're strong, you'll get through this"

Peter B and Jess just like exchanging knowing glances as you get him to settle into a chair and he's still grumbling and irritated but like significantly calmer now and you're just rubbing his shoulders and offering to get him a coffee and giving him a little pep talk amd being very, you know, gentle and nurturing :) totally disarms him and calms him right down, he goes from a red faced screaming mess to purring in a chair as you force idle chit chat about "are you hungry? When did you eat last? Or sleep?" And suddenly he's imagining being at the breakfast table with you and the pups he can easily see you two having together and from then on, Peter B knows to keep you nearby at all times to help calm the big bad Alpha down next time he's about to get an ulcer from stress

[vampiremourning]

.

[lowkeyrobin]

hello

First of all I love your stories like Trevor Spengler is so goooood!

I was wondering I was scrolling through your posts and saw jaeden Martell as an actor one shot?

I was wondering if you could possibly do a headcannon what it would be like dating him please?

Like a sfw version and a NSFW version please

Absolutely no pressure.

And if you don't do that sort of thing I understand lol

Have a miraculous day lovely and keep up the good work ✌️😄

yeah of course!! and thank you so much, I'm glad you're enjoying them! ; also I did see your other thing about apologizing for the NSFW, and you're totally fine, no biggie! I wanted to put this here too bc idk if u saw me reply to it before I deleted it ; thanks for requesting and I hope you enjoy!

JAEDEN MARTELL ; dating shenanigans

summary ; dating stuff with jaeden

warnings ; language

word count ; 564

masterlist

literally a picture perfect duo

one because he's jaeden martell and two because you look so good together

both of your Instagram pages are filled with pictures of each other

honestly, yall don't have any haters, you worked on a few movies together, so people have been shipping you for YEARSSSS

every once in a while you scroll through tiktok and find a few handfuls of edits of you and jaeden + your characters

they're the cutest thing ever

you always like, repost and favorite them

it's so funny going back and seeing the ops reaction lmao

sometimes you do some cutesy photoshoots together cause like, why not?

always indulging into each other's interests

you two religiously go on picnic dates

always going on roadtrips to go see something new

you find all sorts of new little restaurants and places to go on Facebook (thank your parents for that one... it's an awful place but it's good for finding new things)

you guys met on the set of IT

it was so awkward at first with everyone meeting each other and whatnot

but after a day or two it was like you'd all known each other since forever

you quickly formed a special bond with jaeden, like just bonding over a lot of the same things and your feelings

people were shipping your characters but the interviews post it2017 and it2019 releases 😭 got the fans all over you two

you had a minor role in defending jacob but the edits of your characters went hard

same thing with metal lords, like 😭

you had about the same size role as hunter so pretty much a main character but your character barely talked to his outside of with hunter 😭

those editors were struggling but feeding

he was the first to confess, surprisingly

it was like a bit before he got the role for jacob barber

he took you out for coffee and a long walk through a park and stuff

thing like hozier vibes if that makes sense

bro became a poet talking to you like that

he couldn't look at you because he was embarrassed the whole time but you were staring at him while walking. like a mix of shock and happiness

you found a tree stump to place your coffee cup (he'd already finished his) placed it down, and just kissed him

cause wtf did he think was gonna happen? speaking all romantic like that like you wouldn't kiss him...

he's not a big pda person, maybe a 4/10

will happily hold your hand or give you small pecks on the cheek/hand/lips but nothing else

he's not jealous at all either so there's no reason for his pda level to just go from 2-10 at all

on the topic of jealousy, it's very rare for him to be jealous of you

he trusts you and it's not something he really worries about when it comes to other people

you're not that jealous over him either, yall got that healthy mutual trust

and finally, some songs that kind of sum up your little relationship 🙏❤️

cloudbusting ; kate bush

crush culture ; conan gray

bourgeoisieses ; conan gray

empire now ; hozier

wildflower and barely ; hozier & allison russell

too sweet ; hozier

lost it to trying paper towns mix ; son lux

thinking bout love ; wild rivers & wrabel

[julilovesyou444]

hey baee that last fic u did was so good i literally loved it tysm it was so cute!! i have another request - could you write smth where the reader is the 5th member of the band and tom has lit been in love w her since they were kids, and it’s only when they’re like 16/17 that he finally accepts it and confesses to the reader?? like it’s so unlike him to be all soppy and stuff so he didn’t wanna accept his feelings and he’s like super nervous bc he doesn’t wanna like ruin the friendship or anything but ofc the reader likes him back 😋😋 THAT WAS SO LONG LMAO and super specific again but anyways tysm 💗💗💗

i know you ~ tom kaulitz

ty for requesting bb! I’m so happy you liked the last one!! hopefully this one is okay too! enjoy💗💗 if anyone wants, feel free to request

warnings: swearing, yelling, drinking, partying, kissing, thats it i think ??

a/n~ thank you for 100 followers!! I sound stupid saying that but seriously the support means so much to me, gustav req coming soon!! stay tuned and enjoy this little piece for now💟 also thank you for all the comments and messages, I LOVE YOU GUYS🫶

(okay but angry love confessions >>>)

sorry for any grammar or spelling mistakes !!

~

“are we doing anything tonight?”, i asked, laying down on the tour bus’ couch. My legs were draped across bills, he had insisted. We had been on the schrei tour for about a month now. the change from regular life to tour life was insane. we were on the schrei tour, about a couple months or so in. We had a little trouble adjusting at first, we were all getting into a lot of arguments, but now we were fine. Bill and Tom still get into arguments a lot, though. Tom has been acting weirder than usual, and i kinda felt like most of this behavior was aimed at me. It felt like he was distant, and I couldn’t figure out why. I have had a crush on Tom for just about as long as I can remember, but I always pushed away those feelings because I loved our friendship too much, and I didn’t want to confess to him and for there to be a rift in between us. I knew for a fact he didn’t like me back. He had so many absolutely gorgeous fan girls who liked him, so there was no way he liked me. He was also kind of a player. That hurt a little at first, but just like the whole situation, I learned to live with it.

“Uhh, i dont think so. We could do something, though. I wouldn’t mind.”, Bill replied, typing something on his phone. The door to the bus opened, and Tom walked in. The smell of cigarettes followed him. We were waiting on Georg and Gustav to finish up the grocery shopping. I thought he was going to go sit down on his bed, but I was wrong. He was staring down at me.

“What?”, i asked.

“Sit up. I wanna sit on the couch too.”, he said flatly. I groaned and sat up for a second, my legs still over Bills. I looked back and saw that Tom was sat behind me, both of his arms resting on the top of the couch. I fell back onto his lap, my head resting on top of his legs. I felt him tense up under me. He raised his eyebrows at me in a judgy way and I rolled my eyes.

“Who said I’m allowing you to do that?”, he said in a bratty tone.

“Deal with it.”

“I guess I will because it doesn’t really seem like I have a choice.”, he huffed.

“Okay, I’m tired of your guys’ bickering, I’m going to go check on Gustav and Georg and see what is taking them so long. Hans is in the store too, I guess he got tired of sitting and driving all day. I’ll be back soon.”, Bill said, lifting my legs up and letting himself get up. Before either Tom or I could protest, he left.

The silence engulfed us. It felt awkward, and I hated it. I had known Tom since we were seven. He had always been a bit of an asshole, but he was nice too. Lately I had just been getting asshole Tom. He seemed somewhat normal with everyone else, except for me. I started to overthink. Did he find out I liked him? Was he uncomfortable around me now? Did he think I was weird?

“sorry for laying on you, I’ll get up.”, i quickly said as I began to sit up. Tom grabbed my shoulder and pushed me back down into his lap.

“No. You can stay. If you want.”, he said flatly.

“Oh… okay, yea.”

I looked up at him as he gazed back down at me. I couldn’t figure out what was going on with him. What had changed between us? When he was a kid, he would treat me just like he treated everyone else in the band.

“Is everything okay?”, i asked softly.

“What do you mean?”

I could tell he knew exactly what I meant.

“Oh, I don’t know, it’s stupid, nevermind.”, I looked away.

“No, tell me.”, he used his finger to direct my chin back toward him. His eyes were slightly narrowed.

“I don’t know, Tom, you just seem different, that’s all. I feel like you haven’t been yourself lately, but I’m probably just dumb and it’s all in my head.”

He didn’t say anything.

“I’m sorry.”, i immediately apologized in fear of making him angry.

“Why? You have no reason to be.”

Everything he did confused me.

“Okay, well, I just feel like you’ve been a little distant.”

“I haven’t been.”, he said. He sounded a little bit annoyed.

“Okay, sorry.”

“Will you stop saying sorry?”, he lashed out.

I froze. He usually never yelled at me. He knew I hated when people yelled at me. No matter what the situation was, if someone yelled at me, I would cry. He knew that. I sat up and he tried to get me to stay. I shrugged him off and stood up.

“Um, I think I’m gonna go take a nap in my bunk, I’m pretty tired.”, I mumbled.

“Just wait-“

“Leave it, Tom.”, i said quietly before walking away and over to my bunk. I heard Tom curse underneath his breath. I laid down, and about a minute after doing so, I heard everyone load back onto the bus.

“Okay, we have about two hours left in our drive to Dresden and then you guys can get checked into your hotel and do whatever you want for the rest of the day.”, Hans, our driver, announced. Everyone agreed.

“Where’s did she go?”, i heard Bill ask. He sounded confused.

“Her bed, she’s taking a nap.”, Tom replied.

“What did you do now?”, Bill teased.

“Fuck off.”, Tom said back.

“Calm down.”, Georg said.

“Can we just go?”, Tom yelled up to the front of the bus at Hans.

I felt the bus start to move. I got under the covers. I was still very in love with Tom, and the way he was acting towards me hurt me so much. I didn’t know what I did wrong. I missed the way things were. I silently cried for a minute, I felt so stupid. He shouldn’t have this kind of effect on me. I hated crying. I felt like a baby. I fell asleep within a few minutes, trying to forget about what was happening.

~

I felt the bus come to a sharp stop. I blinked my eyes open. I could hear Tom and Bill arguing. I couldn’t see them because I was in the back of the bus, but whatever they were talking about, sounded serious. I stood up and walked over to the cracked door. They couldn’t see me, and I could only see a sliver of them.

Bill was standing up, lecturing Tom about something.

“If you like her, why don’t you just tell her??? I don’t get it.”

“I don’t fucking like her, just fuck off.”, Tom spat back at him.

“Yes you do! It’s obvious! You have since, forever! We can all see that you do. We also all see you treat her like she’s nothing, don’t you think that hurts her?”

“It is kind of obvious.”, Gustav trailed off. They were probably talking about one of the many girls Tom was leading on. He always did this. It didn’t surprise me.

“Shut up, Gustav. And so what if I do like her? How is that any of your business? I’m not going to jeopardize the band or anything else for that matter for some silly crush.”

“It’s not a silly crush, Tom. You’re in love with her.”, Bill said. It was silent.

My stomach dropped. So that’s why he’s been acting all weird. He’s in love with another girl. I couldn’t listen anymore. I stepped out the door and stretched, acting like I heard nothing.

Everyone’s eyes darted to me.

“Good morning, everyone! We are here?”, i said as cheerfully as possible. I wanted to play it off like I was completely fine and like the boy I’ve been in love with since I was seven wasnt in love with some other girl I didn’t even know.

“You just woke up?”, Georg asked. Everyone looked a little worried.

“Yea! Your guys’ fucking yelling woke me up so I figured you were probably arguing over the set list, of course you were dicks are deciding without me so I wanted to come and help choose.”, I laughed. Acting skills, on point. The band looked relieved.

“Well, if that’s over then let’s go get settled into the hotel.”. I suggested. Everyone nodded.

Hans went into the hotel lobby and got us checked in while we unpacked all of our stuff onto caddys. He came back, handed us our keys and told us our floor and room numbers. Georg and Gustav shared a room, as well as Bill and Tom. I had a room to myself, it had always been that way.

We took our stuff inside and went up the elevators into our hotel rooms. I unpacked my stuff pretty quickly before going over to Bill’s room to try and make plans for tonight.

I knocked on their door. Tom cracked it open and squinted his eyes at me before opening it all the way. I pushed past him but he grabbed me and pulled me back.

I furrowed my brows at him and tried to continue walking, but he wouldn’t let me.

“Can you not be so stubborn and just hear me out?”, he said. I stopped trying to get out of his grasp and crossed my arms over my body. I widened my eyes and shook my head a little, giving him a cue to start talking.

“I didn’t mean to yell at you earlier. I’m sorry. I don’t know what’s with me lately, but you’re right, i havent really been myself.”

I sighed. I didn’t want him to feel bad, especially for loving another girl. It was rare that Tom genuinely liked someone, and I didn’t want to get in the way of that.

“I know why, Tom. Its okay, I understand now. I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable or something. I wont get so close to you anymore.”

He looked so confused.

“Wait what? What do you mean ‘uncomfortable’? And I never said I didn’t want you close to me? What are you talking about?”

“Tom, I know you. You’re like my bestfriend, its okay. You don’t have to keep secrets from me. And im not gonna be upset if you don’t want me to be as touchy and stuff with you. I wouldn’t want to do anything to affect your relationship or whatever you are deciding to call it.”

“What are you talking about?”, he asked. He was acting so shocked. Then Bill walked out of the bathroom. Since he clearly wasn’t comfortable with telling me about the girl he was in love with, I wasn’t going to push, so I changed the subject.

“Bill!”

“Oh, hi!”, he smiled, noticing me.

“I was thinking, what if we went to a club tonight?”

“OH MY GOSH, YES!!! please! I need to party, I’ve been so drained from always doing shows, that would be just what I need. you’d come too, right, Tom?”, Bill asked.

“Yea, I guess.”, Tom nonchalantly replied. He acted as if he was too good for that stuff.

“Go tell Georg and Gustav.”, Bill instructed.

“Why do I have to? Why can’t you?”, Tom complained.

“Because you know I take the longest to get ready! It’s getting late already so I’d like to leave sooner than later.”

“Ugh, fine.”, Tom said, rolling his eyes before leaving the room.

“What’s his deal?”, i asked.

Bill hesistated.

“Uhh, i dont know, he’s been weird. Tom will get over it soon though, don’t worry.”

“Oh, okay… it doesn’t have anything to do with me, right?”, i asked, trying to slyly investigate.

I saw Bill physically get taken aback.

“Uhhhhh no! No, I don’t think so. Why do you ask?”

“Uh i just feel like he’s been acting weird towards me I guess. We used to like jokingly flirt and be pretty close but we don’t ever really do that anymore and it feels kind of weird, but I think I know why.”

“Oh… and why is that?”

“He’s in love with somebody. I don’t know who, but it’s probably one of the girls he’s slept with. I think Tom just feels weird with me being how I used to be like with him because he is in love with her, y’know what I mean?”

“Wait-wait, where did you get this from?”, Bills mouth was agape.

“Don’t be mad but I heard you guys arguing on the bus. I heard only part of it. I don’t know why I didn’t say anything, but obviously the rest of the guys know and Tom is refusing to tell me too. He doesn’t know I already know, but I don’t really understand what is stopping him from telling me.”

“Oh… I see.”, Bill said, contemplating his next words.

“I think he will tell you when he’s ready, I think he just wants you to approve of him and he thinks highly of you. I also think you make him a little nervous.”, he finally added.

“Me? Make Tom nervous? Funny, but no way.”, I laughed. Bill made a face and shrugged.

“Okay, I’m gonna go get ready, I’ll see you in like 45.”, I said, turning for the door.

“Wait!”

“Hm?”

“I have a question, answer honestly, please.”

“What is it Bill?”

“Do you have feelings for Tom?”

I could feel myself immediately get flustered and my cheeks start to get red. Fuck fuck fuck.

“What?”, i laughed awkwardly.

“Please, I’m your bestfriend, you can tell me if you do.”

“Why do you even think that? Tom is my best friend just like you are.”

“You aren’t denying it.”

“Bill, please.”

“Do you?”, he asked again.

I gave him pleading eyes, asking him to leave it alone.

“Bill…”

“You can tell me anything. I wouldn’t judge you at all.”, he placed his hands on my shoulders.

I sighed again. Even if I said I didn’t, I knew Bill wouldn’t believe me.

“Maybe?”, i scrunched my face up a bit.

Bill smiled.

“Why are you so happy?”, i asked, unclear on whatever was going on in his head.

“No reason…”

“Please, Bill. Don’t say anything to Tom. I don’t want to ruin our friendship, he means too much to me. And I don’t want to get in the way of his relationship with this girl.”

Bill smiled at me again. He shook his head.

“I promise I won’t. And if I were you, I wouldn’t worry about another girl.”

“I thought he loves her though?”

“Just dont worry about it, go get ready!! And look hot! Not that you don’t already, but go get more hot!”, he said pushing me to the door, a smile permanently engraved on his face.

“Bill- wait Bill-“I stuttered as he pushed me out the door.

“Hm?”

“Please, I’m serious. Don’t say anything.”

“I won’t. Boyscouts honor.”, he held two fingers in the air before slamming the door in my face. I was greeted by Tom leaning against the wall. I flinched, I hadn’t seen him because he was standing behind the open door. His arms were crossed over his chest.

“Jesus, fuck! You scared me.”, i yelled.

“Don’t say anything about what? What were you guys talking about?”

“Nothing.”

“I hate when you keep secrets from me.”

“You’re one to talk.”, i replied, defensively.

“What? Was it about me? Are you embarrassed or something?”, he took a step closer to me, his face now adorned with a smug grin. I scoffed.

“Get over yourself, Tom. The world doesn’t revolve around you.”

“Maybe not, but sometimes I begin to think you do.”, he teased.

I rolled my eyes and turned around to go to my hotel.

“Be ready soon!”, he called after me as i slammed the door.

~

Bill banged on my door, for the third time in the last five minutes.

“HURRY UPPPPP”, he groaned. I finished zipping up my shoe before opening the door. Bill looked annoyed but as soon as he saw me, his face lit up.

“Oh. My. God.”, he said, looking me up and down.

“You like?”, i asked, already knowing the answer. I was wearing a denim mini skirt that was way too short, a black lacy top that had long belle sleeves with a pretty cleavagey v-neck. It was cropped perfectly to display my belly button ring. I of course had a ton of jewellry on too, with a bit of makeup as well. I wore platform black boots that went up part of my calf. They were leather and I had been gifted them, but I rarely got the chance to wear them.

“Obviously!”, bill exclaimed.

I walked out to see the rest of the band waiting in the hallway. They all looked a little shocked when they saw my outfit. I usually didn’t dress-up too much, mainly because I didn’t have the confidence to do so. I decided to just let go and have fun tonight.

I walked past them and they just stood there. I clicked the button for the elevator and looked back at them down the hallway.

“Are you guys coming or…?”

They scurried down the hallway and got into the lift with me. We decided to go to a club that was only two blocks away. It was a pretty popular club, and we usually got into most clubs that we tried to because of our status in Germany. The bouncer recognized us and let us skip the line. Perks of being semi-famous I guess.

The music was so loud I could barely hear my own thoughts. Bill grabbed my hand to pull me away and get drinks. I turned away and grabbed Tom’s hand, dragging him along with us. At first he just let me hold his hand, but then he held it back, letting Bill and I lead him through the crowd of drunk people.

Bill ordered us all shots. Tom watched as i downed mine, and drank his not long after. Bill snaked his arm around my waist and pulled me away to the dance floor. We danced for a little before some random girl took it upon herself to steal him away. I couldn’t really blame her though. I danced by myself for a little but got bored and decided I wanted another drink. I made my way over to the bar and ordered a drink I saw another girl have. I began to drink it slowly, looking around. I made eye contact with a guy. He was by himself, looking me up and down. He smiled and i smiled back. He had to be at least 22. He approached me and asked if he could buy me a drink, despite me not even being close to the one i just got myself. I told him that if he wanted to, he had to dance with me first. He agreed, and we went over to crowd of dancing bodies.

At first, it started pretty innocent. Just giggling, drinking, and dancing. He started to get touchy, putting his hands on my waist. He had them slowly go from my waist, downwards. I would pull away whenever he got to close to the one thing he wanted, but no matter how many times I pulled away, he would always try to do it again. I looked over and was met with Tom’s eyes. They were staring at me, a sort of gross look on his face. Was he really that disgusted by me?

“can I get you that drink now?”, he winked. I internally cringed but said yes. Free drinks? Fine by me. He ordered me something, but nothing for himself. As soon as the drink was in my hand, he was urging and pressuring me to drink if. I did. Another drink, same deal. I downed the drink, wanting him to just leave me alone about it. Even though I told him not to, he ordered another drink. I tried to push it away, but he kept pushing it towards me. Finally, he put the drink down. I tried to back up, but he pulled me into a sloppy kiss that I wanted no part of. I tried to push him off but he was too strong, or maybe I was just to tipsy.

“get off of me.”

“please, stop”

but he wouldn’t.

“I don’t want this-“, i started, yet another plea for him to stop. a pair of hands yanked me back. before i could even see who it was, I saw Tom step in front of me and push that guy into the bar counter.

“She told you to get off her you fucking pervert. Is getting girls drunk enough so they hook up with you your only hobby. Pathetic.”, he spat. The guy looked like he wanted to say something back, or fight Tom, but he just cursed under his breath and stumbled away. I felt embarrassed. I shouldn’t have let myself get in that situation.

“Thank you.”, i mumbled to Tom. He shook his head.

“Just stop. You’re really fucking stupid sometimes y’know? Putting yourself in dumb situations like that.”, he rolled his eyes as he walked away. I wasn’t going to let him be that rude and just walk away, so I followed him. I watched as he weaved through people. I followed hom, but not to closely. I saw him open a door and go in before practically slamming it. It was too loud for anyone to even notice. I waited a minute before going into the door as well. There were a few flight of stairs. I climbed up them. I had finally made it to the top. I opened the door. The roof.

The cold air hit my face as I stepped out, the smell of cigarette smoke filling my senses. I saw Tom, standing towards the edge of the building, smoking as he looked out at the city. I began to walk over to him. The gravel crunched underneath my boots, making him turn around.

“What the fuck is your problem to me? You’ve been such a dick and I haven’t even done anything. I just want for things to be normal.”, i said, angered.

“They aren’t normal.”, he said, taking a puff of his cig.

“And how is that in any way my fault? I haven’t done anything to you, yet you are treating me like shit. You loving some girl doesn’t mean you can act like that, it doesn’t have anything to do with me.”

“It has EVERYTHING to do with you!”, he shouted.

“What the fuck did I do?! I don’t understand what I did to make you despise me so much! Why do you hate me so much?!”, I yelled back.

“I don’t hate you, I’m in love with you, you fucking idiot!”, he yelled. His eyes widened at his own words.

I was so confused. It didn’t feel real. I could barely comprehend what he had just said.

“What?”, was all I could manage to say. He looked so nervous, his hands shaking.

“I’m fucking in love with you, okay?? I have been ever since I’ve known you. I’ve tried to push it away, I’ve always denied it, but i cant anymore. I’ve tried everything and I can’t! I’ve slept with countless girls but the only thing I’ve ever been able to think about is you. You’re always on my mind and no matter what I do, I can’t seem to get you out of my head. I’ve been being mean to try and distance you from me and make myself stop loving you but it’s fucking torture and it’s stupid and it hasn’t even worked in the slightest. Bill told me you heard us on the bus, it wasn’t some girl, we were talking about you. Its you, and it always has been. I feel sick when I see you with other guys, I get so jealous I can barely handle it. All I’ve ever wanted is you, and not having you is killing me. I’m sick and tired of pretending like I don’t love you because I do! Hate is the last thing on this earth that I feel about you. I love you so fucking much, and I’m sorry for treating you the way I have been.”, he yelled.

I could hardly believe anything I was hearing. Tom Kaulitz? In love with me? This is a prank, right? It felt like a dream.

“Are you serious?”, i asked.

“Really? After that long ass rant or about loving you, you don’t believe me?”, he dryly laughed.

“Tom, im serious, please…”

“Yes, I’ve never been more sure on something in my entire life.”

“Why now? Why haven’t you said anything?”, I asked, still unsure.

“I wanted to, but I didn’t know how to. We would flirt, but you always took it as a joke. I wasn’t joking. I loved you so much as a friend too, I was scared that if I told you, I would lose you. i also hate talking about my feelings and shit, i feel so stupid whenever I do.”

Part of me was still processing everything. Boy I had been in love with forever, loved me back. In the exact same way I loved him, he loved me. I couldn’t hold back anymore.

“fuck it, i love you too. I’ve been in love with you since we were like eight, and I never said anything because I thought I had no chance with you and I didn’t want to make things weird. The only thing I wanted was for you to stay my friend and for you to like me. When you started acting like you didn’t, I felt horrible and I felt like there was no hope for anything for us. I acted like I didn’t feel anything for you because all I’ve ever wanted is for you to be happy. Even if it meant you being with someone else. I love you, Tom.”, I rambled.

He closed the distance between us. He placed his hands on each side of my jaw, his thumbs slowly caressing my cheeks. I could feel myself get goosebumps, staring up into his dark eyes.

“you were going to let me be with someone else so I could be happy? even if it meant you weren’t?”, he softly asked. I nodded.

“what did I ever do to deserve someone so sweet liek you?”, he murmured. His eyes glanced down at my lips. He took one of his thumbs and pulled it across my bottom lip, tugging down at it gently.

“God, you don’t even know how long I’ve wanted to kiss you.”

“How long?”

He laughed.

“Forever. I want to kiss you now more than ever.”

“Prove it.”

He chuckled at my boldness. Tom leaned in, our noses brushing against each other. I couldn’t stand the teasing anymore, I had waited too long. I dipped his face and pulled him down. Tom, smiling into the kiss at my neediness. It was so passionate, I could kiss his mmm forever. Our lips fit together like puzzle pieces. I pulled him in more, unsure if he was even able to get any closer than he already was. he tasted like Marlboro Reds and liquor. I loved it, I couldn’t get enough of him. One of his hands found its way down to my waist, while the other one tangled itself in my hair. He tugged ever so slightly, earning a soft groan from me. Tom smiled at this, getting the exact reaction he wanted. He pulled away, our foreheads resting against each other.

“fuck, you look so pretty. I wanted to tell you how good you looked earlier tonight but i was too scared.”, he mumbled. I smiled, the sweetness that I had missed was returning to Tom. I pulled him back into another kiss, the first one being incredibly addicting. Our tongues fought for dominance, of course he won.

The door to the roof swung open, startling both Tom and I. We attempted to pull away, but I before I could even see who it was, I heard Bill’s voice.

“I was looking for you guy- OH MY GOD.”, he said, a little shocked. his face quickly turned into a smile.

“What took you guys so long?”, he teased.

“Oh shut up.”, Tom laughed, his hand now around my waist.

“Well, I ordered us some more shots, so… c’mon. you guys can finish whatever this is later.”, he smiled, waking back into the building.

“let’s go inside.”, i said.

Tom kissed me again, this time with the full intent of being sweet and gentle.

“it feels weird to say out loud now, but I love you.”, he said into my ear. I couldn’t stop myself from smiling. I looked back up to him, seeing the very boy that i fell in love with all those years ago.

“I love you, too.”

~

a/n #2 ~ THIS WAS SO LONG IM SORRY. also sorry for this taking so long the first one I wrote DELETED😕 I’m on vacation right now but I hope you guys enjoyed this long ass story.

[zhuoyichenpretty]

aww yeah ep 20 GOOD

I guess I do (very casual, broadstroke) episode commentaries now, halfway through the show lmao. Spoilers below!!

Bai Jiu BETRAYAL?

Wen Xiao WANTED?

Zhuo Yichen DETECTIVE-ING?

Ying Lei BACK?

*crowd cheers*

The dots are connecting like crazy with the big bad's whole inner core crusade and also with the simultaneous demon case like I did not recognize Ao Yin as the demon Li Lun first released eight years ago but oooh do I enjoy that minor payoff.

Love the repeated use of the demonic-spell-restraining sigils now that we've been introduced to them though I wonder why the Bureau doesn't ever seem to make use of them. Maybe they don't deal with enough powerful demons to need to paint those in their own (very empty) dungeon? Or perhaps just plot convenience. (edit: someone has pointed out the Bureau indeed uses them!! I'm just blind <3)

Anyway I kind of wish in the Chongwu Camp dungeon PSJ fought a little bc she's so cool in action and their bailing was a little abrupt, but it makes sense that they'd have an immediate getaway plan. Also this is an ep 19 comment but that line Mr. 3-Face Mask delivered about PSJ being fated to always be betrayed by her little brother(s) HURT. So good.

Back to the Bureau, I do love me a good framing, and I'm also happy to get a tiny bit of the episodic demon-murder-case style back. WX was v clever to hide out in Situ Mansion, and (small detail but) I appreciate that the others catch her up on the Bai Jiu thing onscreen. As an aside, I also like that the actress for WX got to be double-casted even just briefly. Seeing some of the actors get to play around with portraying various extremes in characterization and costuming is a ton of fun.

And then yay Bai Jiu backstory at last~! It's crazy how much that blood moon fucked up everyone's lives eight years ago huh.

Everything ZYC says to him is on point (and honestly, ZYC is really quite adept at comforting others, he just sucks utter ass at it when it's his fault and he has to apologize lmaooo) but of course my favorite scene in the whole episode is as follows:

The very slight shine in the waterline, the bittersweet smile/grimace as, deliberately or not, ZYC's words indirectly echo everything about the circumstances between the two of them right now??? Whew. They did that for me specifically.

Anyway, this was a good one to chew on for me, packed with plot movement enough that I didn't feel unsatisfied with just one episode. I'm glad that so far it seems like the release schedule bears in mind what episodes should be watched in pairs for maximum effect (eps 16/17, 18/19 specifically) and which ones are okay to stand alone for the day, but I also don't want to speak too soon haha. We'll see how ep 21 fares.

Also since this is a ZYC stan account (lmao) I have some obligatory ZYC thoughts that I haven't managed to fit anywhere else. I've been meaning to comment on this for a while now and was reminded by this episode: I love the fact that ZYC actually smiles quite often. I think it's a bit surprising every time he does because he so easily fits the archetype of stoic broody action hero, but it really is just an archetype he's fit himself into, and it's never clearer than when they flash back to smiley baby!ZYC (how freely and purely he used to give those smiles away...).

On the other side of this is also how caustic and biting he can be with his words, whether sarcastically or otherwise, and how clearly his face telegraphs his emotions in general. I love that he actually emotes quite a lot and isn't cold and unaffected in the least, just pouty frowny and awkward.

The last piece to this for me is probably his age (which I very much appreciated being established super early on) and how convincingly TJR portrays him as young and inexperienced and extremely earnest. He's so sincere in everything he does that it really doesn't take much to move him, which also (imo) makes his arc less overdone.

We all know from the start what direction his development will likely go, how he'll learn he's mistaken about ZYZ and how he'll grow to have a more nuanced view of the world as he creates more bonds with others. But he's so emotional and emotionally aware that it doesn't really take much push and pull to get him there. And actually, it's not untread ground to him—he is moreso thawing, in part returning to the open-hearted nature that he had to very abruptly shutter away rather than fundamentally changing as a person. I think to me, that makes his character more compelling to watch because his cynicism about the world is perhaps the least sincere thing about him. It's entirely learned, and not by choice. Relatable.