#bc come ON dad dont you get it??? i want to do all three!!

[mrs-mikko-rantanen]

My adhd is kicking my ass in a very "ohhhhhhhhhhh so thats what was wrong with me when I was a kid...." kinda way

[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for being Johnny Lawrence’s daughter

Johnny Lawrence x daughter!reader

warnings: alcohol, underage drinking, classic johnny sexism <3

a/n: WHAT! ME write a fic thats not gn, i know. im shocked too but its just bc i feel johnny is so gender-stereotypey that doing this gn wouldn’t work very well but very open to a son!r or nb!r if anyone is interested (bc seriously. johnny cannot help but bring up genders). also i just want to say that a lot of this (not all!) honestly reminds me of or are actual things that have happened w my dad bc johnny is literally my dad if my dad was like 8 years older i think also i wrote this all in one sitting ALSO NO COBRA KAI SEASON 6 SPOILERS

prompt:

GIRL DAD!

you always kinda just gravitated toward living with your dad

“y/n, i’m so proud of you. i never have to worry about you. you can take care of yourself. robby on the other hand, i worry about him. i think girls are just more self sufficient” -johnny, a little drunk

“thanks dad” -you, also a little drunk (hes a “cool dad”)

he was the type of parent that “prefers that if you’re gonna do something stupid at least do it while he’s around” aka underage drinking

whenever he stays out late you fall asleep in his bed. and lock him out

“y/n! open the door!” -johnny, banging on the door

“no! your bed is more comfortable” -you

he thought it was sweet honestly but he did want to sleep in his bed

sort of like a lesson not to come home late all drunk and gross

he was VERY against letting you drive his car

“dad, i need my license!” -you

“no woman is getting behind the wheel of my firebird” -johnny

“why do you have to make it about women? i’ll fight you” -you

“you’ll lose that fight” -johnny

“oh, so you’d fight a teenage girl? wow, real classy, dad” -you

“no, but i’d fight my teenage daughter. i brought you into this world and i’ll take you out” -johnny

you honestly had a great sense of humor with johnny, but you’d check him if he said anything too messed up

“dad, it’s not the 80’s anymore, you can’t say that” -you

“dont tell me what i can and cant say! the 80’s were awesome, i wish it was the 80’s again” -johnny

“so i’ve heard” -you

he helped you with your homework as a kid until like, 2nd grade when multiplication and division got involved

he did teach you karate growing up! but mostly the basics, for self defense purposes

“hey, never let any guy try to impress you with his karate skills. he’s probably a douche” -johnny, pausing “i sure was”

late night movie marathons (70s/80s classics for sure)

he took care of you during your first hangover (high school parties, ya know)

“didn’t i teach you better than to mix liquors” -johnny

“ugghhhh” -you

yes, you have heard about daniel larusso. enough said LMAO

robby and you had a kind of sweet but distant relationship

occasional check-in texts

robby: are you doing okay with dad? he’s actually buying food and shit?

you: yeah! he’s fine right now, how’s mom? new stepdad yet? is he rich?

robby: mom’s not going anywhere she’d find a rich guy, but keep dreaming

you wear a lot of your dad’s old t-shirts. usually band tee’s

oh and he made sure you got into the “right music”

he used to drive you around in the firebird when you were a SMALL CHILD (front seat, no car seat!) and blast his old cassettes

for YEARS he’d pull the “who is this” “what song is this” game with the reasoning:

“if you wear a band shirt and some asshole asks you to name three songs, i want you to name ten” -johnny

listen. you were still “daddy’s girl” or whatever used to be a cute little saying and is now ruined but whatever

“dad, can i have twenty bucks?” -you

“for what” -johnny

“for fun. pleaseeee” -you

*johnny pulls out his wallet and gives you $40*

could he afford it? no. can he say no? also no.

the absolute fear he felt when you got your first period

“it’s fine, i can call mom” -you

“no, it’s not fine! i’ve had girlfriends before, i got this. stay here, i’ll be back” -johnny

he went to the store and bought the most random assortment of period products and pain meds and snacks and a heating pad

A for effort

when the diaz family moved in across from you guys, miguel took one look at you and johnny said:

“stay away from my daughter”

when the karate fuss got started you tried to keep your distance but sooner or later you joined the dojo and proved to your dad just how “badass” you could be

“take notes everyone, y/n’s gonna be the next all valley champ!” -johnny

taglist: @ravenmoore14 // @retvenkos // @sweetheartlizzie07 // @an4aaa // @summersimmerus // @xoxobabydolls // @sapphireplums // @petersgroupie // @ravenhood2792 // @evilcr0ne // @thedarkqueenofavalon // @elenavampire21 // @elemental-of-magic //

[depresssant]

Shades of Cool

NEGLECTFUL!PLATONIC!YAN!batfam x GN!reader

synopsis : growing up with a shit mom and constant step-dads and mom's boyfriends, your view on life has grown pretty bleak. you just want to die, since it doesn't seem to get better than this. things can't get any worse, can they?

wsp guys. it's been pretty long, huh?... OK IM SORRY FOR NOT POSTING IT QUICKLY. here, damn 🙄. anyways, i hope yall enjoy n im glad u guys liked the first chapter. lets just hope this one lives up to yalls expectations 😭. follow me and repost this if u want a chapter three. also I NEED SOMEONE TO EDUCATE ME ABOUT SUNDAY FROM HSR BC I WANNA WRITE FICS ABOUT HIM SO BAD SO PLS SOMEONE EDUCATE ME N ALSO IF U KNOW LOVE AND DEEP SPACE??? PLS HIT ME UP AND EXPLAIN THIS LORE BC I WANNA WRITE YANDERE FICS FOR THEM SO BAD

“Why are balls called balls when testicles sounds hella fancier?”

At your friend’s bizarre question, the face of your other friend, Zarian, twinges in disgust. “Jayelene… why do you feel the need to put that out there?”

You huff in amusement, focusing on your pizza before what Jaylene says ruins your entire mood.

“I’m just saying! Testicles just seems more appropriate⏤the type of fancy shit drake and his family would say.”

Tim Drake Wayne…

Dinner with him and his freak-a-zoid family was like trying to make it past no-man’s land without any help to shield you from the straight up chilling vibes they gave off with their constant comments about bat facts. Bats. The atmosphere during the entire time you spent there was dreadful and quite literally heavy since Tim's youngest little brother wanted to sneak stares at you as if you wouldn’t notice his bug-looking eyes creeping into your soul.

Rich people really are weird, huh?

The Wayne family is nothing like how you expected them to be. They’re supposed to be cold, mysterious, and irresistibly enchanting, but all you’ve got are creepy vibes and a strong urge to stay away from them as much as possible. From the way Mr. Wayne made that weird comment about your father in the limo to how forcibly happy Richard or “Dick” was with you, you’ve come to an understanding that rich people are complete lunatics.

The Wayne family is full of a bunch of lunatics.

And you’re not afraid to voice that.

“There you go again,” Jaylene sighs when she notices the irritated expression on your face. “It’s never that serious, [Name]. You just hate everyone.”

“No, you don't get it! They were creepy as hell! Like… Like bats in dark caves coming at you all at once. They talk funny, they look funny⏤they act funny! What normal man name drops your mother’s name after knowing each other for about thirty minutes?”

Zarian huffs in amusement. “That’s the creepy part. How does Mr. Wayne know your name?”

“I dont know.” You run your fingers through your hair and lean back against the booth seat. “I don't want anything to do with them. Billionaire or not, how the hell does he know my mother’s name.”

It was perhaps towards the end of your stay at the Wayne’s manor for dinner, and you knew you had to go home, so you had largely hinted at leaving to Drake. Everything had gotten wrapped up, but when you were just about to leave, Mr. Wayne had told you, “make sure to tell [M/n] I said hi.”

You could only stare at him in shock as your body carried along, because how does a man as famous and wealthy as bruce wayne know your mother⏤your mother? He’s the chief executive officer of Wayne Enterprises yet mentions your mother?

That moment alone is enough to wave every red flag in your brain that screams at you, telling you something is up with these shady people. The only question is what? What can a billionaire possibly want from you? Out of everything the world has to offer, the most influential billionaire in America wants to target some meager high school kid?

What do these people want from you? Is it a rich people thing to play around with those below you? Well, you guess it probably is. Like, is Mr. Wayne gonna pop out with his soulless eyes and say, ‘you’re my long lost child?’ or something?

You still don’t know why you’re being a goat stuffed before slaughtering. These people want something from you, but you? You’ve got nothing to offer that they could want. Why the hell do they even bother? If there's one thing you really hate, it’s being left in the dark like this. Not knowing is terrifying. It's dangerous. Not knowing means not being prepared, and if you’re not prepared, you won’t make it out. Damn it, you should’ve booked it the moment Mr. Wayne mentioned your father in the limo. Movies and shows always display rich people as eccentric and psychopathic weirdos, and now you’re finally believing it.

Damn it.

You’re in danger. Okay.

Maybe that’s an exaggeration. But maybe it’s not.

You’ve watched enough true crime and have enough intuition and trust in your gut to know when something is wrong.

It’s not adding up.

You’re not dumb. You see all the warnings there, but what if you're exaggerating. What if this is just the nature of the Waynes, and you think you’re special enough to be noticed by them? Mr. Wayne is a damn billionaire! He’s got the money to do whatever he wants, so it’s only natural for him to do a background check on everybody that interacts with his sons, right?

It’s all in your head… It’s all in your head.

Sighing, you stare at the plate of food in front of you, appetite long gone. Still, you grab a fork and continue to eat as Zarian and Jaylene scream back and forth next to you. Drake, who had accompanied the three of you to the diner after practice, has left, thankfully. He left as soon as his food arrived while talking about some family emergency, and honestly, you’re pretty damn grateful for that.

Ever since dinner at his house, he’s surrounded you like a pillow smothering you, and you can’t do anything about it. He’s a billionaire’s son, for fuck’s sake.

It doesn’t take long for you and your friends to finish up, and you all part ways at the door of the diner before you clutch the straps of your backpack and walk around the city endlessly. This is a habit for you now⏤a way to put off going home as much as possible ever since you found out your mother’s boyfriend doesn’t come home until one or two in the morning.

That balding, ugly, sleazy piece of shit.

He’s as gross as every other man your mother’s brought home under the terribly veiled illusion that he’ll provide her a good life and treat her right. No matter how many times you try to tell that blind bitc… No. It's wrong. It’s not your mother’s fault.

But it sometimes feels like that, though.

Most mother’s destroy their own lives for their children, yet yours cannot even think about leaving the man that beats her child on a daily. Those types of mothers leave their spouses the second they see something wrong, while your mother treats those finger-print bruises around your neck like a necklace instead of abuse.

You’ve given up on her. You gave up on her back when you were eleven years old locked in a room with her boyfriend, and she didn’t listen. Or when you were twelve. Or thirteen. Or fourteen. Or fifteen. Or sixteen. Or seventeen. And now eighteen.

And each day feels like a repetition of the same. Wake up, go to school, practice, walk around, go home, get beat, and sleep like none of it all happens. It’s a routine you despise with every fiber of your being⏤makes you wanna jump over Gotham City Bridge before thinking about returning home because who would want to? Who wants this average life?

A life where you’re not happy enough, not sad enough. Not good enough, not bad enough. Not energized enough, not tired enough. You feel like a survivor of a plane crash floating on a raft at the center of the endless ocean with no way out. Everything just seems so vast, wide, and unreachable. How can you find the shore on a simple raft? How can you find a way out of inescapable misery if it’s not by drowning?

You’ve been waiting to find the shore, but it’s been a whole eighteen years since you’ve found yourself floating along the ocean.

That whole “it’ll get better” shit is a tragic lie.

Whatever.

It doesn’t matter⏤not anymore, at least. You’re going to get far away from this place and never look back. Never have to relieve this wretched city. Never have to be confined by chains again. You’ve only a few months left before you’re free.

Until then, you’ll have to be patient and go home because the sun has fully disappeared.

Nothing but satellites twinkle in the disgustingly polluted sky of Gotham City, and the streets have come to a staggering halt as you stroll about the sidewalks, trying to find the longest path to get home. One in the morning is always the perfect time in Gotham because it’s too late and too early to be outside, so it’s generally safe for a walk.

Of course, the universe likes to prove you wrong at every point.

The sound of a thud followed by a pained groan behind you has your legs locked and ready to run with your brain screaming alerts, but you take a deep breath and turn around. How bad can it get, anyways? The sight before you surprised you nonetheless. It’s… Nightwing, a Bludhaven hero, here in Gotham, just randomly popping up behind you?

With clear bleeding cuts and sprouting bruises across his body.

In the random alley you just happen to be in?

No. You’re looking into it too much.

His eyes lock onto and they make you freeze right then and there like he’s cast some spell upon you. But that’s for a cold, brief second before you’re hooking your thumbs under the straps of your backpacks and turning around hot on your heels, refusing to spare him a single second. 

You even hear him murmur a strained, “wait,” but you don't care. 

It’s rude, mean, cruel, and it’s also none of your business. All you simply do is walk ahead to your approaching doom with an pit of unease and bitter understanding of your helplessness in your stomach. You can already feel the soon-to-be new bruises blooming along your back.

You’re not a good person.

But, really, who is?

Smoking really does skill.

But now you know why people do it.

Each drag is more out of necessity than it is a choice ever since you’ve met your friend’s plug at the dumb age of sixteen, but it's a way to dull the harsh truth of reality. The world just fades into nothing but muted and mixed colors like the loud city underneath your balcony it blurs into a faint hum the longer you stare at the spiral puffs of smoke that disappear into the air. 

Everything’s bitter⏤the joint and you.

Really bitter at the blood semi-dried on your face and the dull ache along your back.

You’ve got about an hour and a half until you have to head out to school, so what other way is there to spend it than smoking away your brain? The joint’s a temporary escape, but it helps you stall whatever new feeling of despair you’ll feel for the day. Until you’re interrupted by your phone buzzing⏤the sound still a dull hum in your ears

“... Hello?”

“[Name]!”

Zarian’s voice?

“Where the hell are you? Hurry up and get to school or else you’re gonna get in trouble for not helping to set up the club fair, and coach will be on our ass! And don't forget to bring money for the tickets!”

Coach?... Club fair?... Club fair! Holy shit!

Your eyes shoot open, and you frantically scramble up, tossing the joint over the balcony railing before hectically staggering through the living room like a drunk man. Damn it, how could you be so clueless and forget such an important event? Especially one you need money for! Damn it⏤damnit! What do you do?

… Mom! She’s got a box of money somewhere in her closet, right? You’ve seen it before! It's just twenty dollars, and she wont notice. Okay… Okay. You’re quick to get ready. You wash away all the blood that’s dried on your face, brush your teeth, and change into baggy jeans and a clean shirt before storming into your mother’s bedroom and rummaging through her things. 

She’s off at work. Her bastard boyfriend doesn't come home until late at night, which means he’s probably already taken money for the day. Okay. That's fine. They won't notice.

But you can't find anything! What the hell? Where is that fucking box? You could’ve sworn it was there on the top shelf last night, but as you swipe your hands across everything on the shelf, you can’t find it. All of a sudden, something made of wood hits the top of your head and falls to the ground with a crack. You hiss, palm moving to cover where you got hit, but your eyes land on the box that now has money strewn all across the floor and a broken… false bottom?

What the fuck.

You pull away at the rest of the false bottom to only be met with countless photos of you as a child with your mother. Mom’s shit boyfriend had all the family photos taken down for some weird reason, so they’ve been here this entire time? All of these photos are full of you throughout every stage of your life, but some have different people in them as well. Their faces are either scratched out or they’re ripped out of the photo entirely.

From what you can gather, the figures are a man and what seems to be a teenage boy. The absurdity and even slight creepiness of the scratched out faces has you laughing, yet even with your now dulled senses, your eyes land on a photo you failed to notice earlier. Maybe you’re hallucinating. There must be something wrong with your brain. Or your eyes. The universe must be playing with you because is that a photo of you and a teenage-looking dick grayson?

Your eyes widen because it looks just like the strange man you had the unfortunate opportunity of having a conversation with during dinner with the Waynes. It’s him! More importantly, why the hell is he holding a ‘three year old’ you’s hand? You probably should be screaming. Yelling. Maybe panicking? But all you can do is shuffle through the rest of the box before your fingers graze against something metal that has your heart jumping.

It’s a small camera.

With a bat engraved on its side.

Ears ringing so loudly in your head you can't even think, you wipe your teary and red eyes hastily before grabbing a twenty dollar bill, putting everything except for the photo and camera in the box, set it back on the closet shelf, and hastily grab your backpack before making way to school.

The second you reach the damned place, you seek out your now three friends and drop into a seat with a heavy thud, sighing and meeting Tim's eyes with a burning gaze.

“You mean to tell me [Name] found the camera? And you decided to tell me after school?”

Time Drake Wayne sighs and runs his fingers through his black hair, shrugging apathetically while scrolling through every photo in his phone that he’s taken of you during the club fair. His brother, Richard, is pacing throughout his room anxiously as he rambles off about their latest fuckup. 

“Look, Bruce doesn't let any slip ups happen,” Tim murmurs in exasperation. “He wouldn't let this happen because [Name]’s mom and him talked this morning. Relax, he probably knows.”

It's not a lot, but it’s enough to calm Richard down. The man takes a deep breath but finds himself sitting down next to Tim, trying to get a good look at the pictures. “How mad was [Name]?”

“High, for starters, but clearly pissed off. Very observant, too.”

“Don’t tell anyone else. Not until Bruce gives us the okay.”

TAGLIST :

@ilovemyhusbandnanami (so real), @missikkj, @ferakillia, @darlinqvi, @soriansick, @sleepydhanie, @h0rr0r-10ver-69 (love ur blog aesthetic bae), @anuttellaa (OK WINX 😽), @feral-childs-word (love the pfp), @shycreatorreview, @friesandfixations, @stuff6969fuckyou, @babiebubsie, @jsprien213, @cattioo, @cherrydaisymanic (cheetah?leopard? printttt 😍), @00hellohello00, @princessloveweird, @amber-content, @idonthaveanameforthisacc, @f1lover4ever, @dreamsarenicer, @imaginarydreams, @solkara (love the calm aesthetic), @bobfood, @toast-on-dandelioms, @ijustfuckme, @cantfindmelol, @xx1shadow1xx, @azulawayne, @box-of-kinderjoy, @iamaunknownsecret, @missybabes, @phoenixgurl030, @couldeatthatgirlforlunch, @devils-blackrose, @arevvv, @freakthis, @yourhornysister, @kirahhhh, @perfectparadisegardener, @testishere, @spaceunicorn293, @vanilliona (love the pfpp), @uknowimdumb, @esposadomd, @dakotali, @lilyalone, @kore-of-the-underworld, @pix-stuff, @hellcatsworld, @chericia, @mspoisoncoil (love the bannnnerrr) , @devotedlyshamelessdetective, @cheeseburgercasserole (love the aesthetic), @twismare

so follow me n repost if u want part lll. and somebody pls explain hsr and love and deepspace lore to me. making a taglistttttt. if this post doesnt get as many likes as the first one, im deleting this series 😭. if u see a grammatical mistake, no u didnt 😃🔪

if anybody’s got requests about this series or in general, feel free to ask!!!

WAIT!! FOLLOW MY WATTPAD ACCOUNT : @depresssant. I JUS PUBLISHED A HISTORICAL YANDERE X READER STORY

[rookiesbookies]

Please I need more strength kink like you wrote for König but for the text of the COD men. Does Soap show off and lift heavier when he sees you saunter into the gym? Does Ghost try not to pay attention as you stare? I am down bad for these boys

So this is the most recent ask Ive gotten but dont fret my other requesters, yalls are taking more time bc they’re longer form pieces (I dont want to spoil but honeymoon/consummation night with Ghost (doing some research for this one), some Konig wifey bits (there’s two or three), and Ghost’s wife wearing his mask) Im so excited you all are interacting with me I just wanna say. I love you all *MUAH* big kiss.

Also I took Keegan off this one bc I don’t think I have a lot of Keegan fans reading? (ik I love him tho) so if anyone wants it just put a comment and I’ll write one and edit it so its in here.

Edit right here: I put Keegan down at the bottom. Dw Keegan girlies he’s here now.

Another edit: I put Krueger bc a reblog asked for it

Without much more here’s:

Strength Kink with the 141

Masterlist is pinned as always, also let me know if yall want any as full blown fics.

Price

Price is an “old dog” as he calls himself. He knows he’s getting softer, the wrinkles are setting in, he doesn't quite have the body he used to as a LT. Kinda got a dad bod after adopting 3 boys.

First time he sees you drool over him? He is down fucking bad. Will do anything to see his sweet lady all red in the face over him again.

Fucking saunters over to you, hits you with “you can feel if ya like, love. Go on.” just holds his arms away from his chest while he’s in his tank top.

If you take him up on this offer (and I assume yall are dating at this point) and even just grab at a peck, he is tense. His abs are tight, his butt is clenched, he is doing it all to seem like he still has his young and sharp LT body.

He knows you dont care and love his dad bod and all his soft pillowy goodness but sometimes he feels like the pillsbury dough boy.

Absolutely would pick you up and carry you bridal style at any chance.

Tells you he’s “just practicing” however he is very clearly showing off.

If you come find him at the gym to drool all over him, that max he was only supposed to do one of per set, he is not repping.

“John, are you sure- I’ve never seen you lift this much you look red-”

“I'm alright, love, just doing my reps trying to set a new pr.” Little do you know that by repping this, this is his new pr.

Gaz and Soap are sitting there mouth open because Price has never done that and not fallen over and now he just KEEPS. GOING.

And Price’s wife just keeps drooling over him as Simon spots the poor guy.

(This is what i mean btw)

Soap

The worst about it of them all.

I'm telling you right now, if you have an oral fixation on his muscles, he will mate for life like a swan. Because if you mark up his muscles he will do EVERY SINGLE WORK OUT shirtless until Ghost is like “Johnny. You look like a slut and smell like a whore with all that cologne. We’re in the bloody gym.”

He will walk around shirtless in the tightest sweatpants to show off his thighs and abs to you.

Will bench press you.

Put your weight on the hip thrust and will call you over or send videos of him doing it.

If you’re sitting somewhere he will just pick you up and move you for the hell of it under the excuse he wanted to sit there just to see you get red.

If you compliment his body once, I'M TELLING YOU ONE TIME, he will buy the TIGHTEST shirts imaginable around the house to show off his shoulders, back, pecs, biceps, and abs.

If you even mention having a bad day, your face is going between his pecs. He also absolutely can do the thing where he can flex them one at a time and he does it 24/7 for fun.

Catch him planking at the gym?

Feeling bold?Let’s shimmy under the poor bastard to look up at him.

“Do push ups.”

“Bonnie, the fuck you mean-”

“Come down, get a kiss, and go back up?”

“And if I fall? Which I won’t but I gotta ask.”

“Can’t feel any worse than when you dive onto the bed to wake me up in the mornings.”

He’s floored. Goes down, gets his kiss, comes up.

Price has watched Soap do more pushups than he ever has outside of a punishment when he was in basic training. Johnny has half the mind to let himself drop, smoother you in sweaty hugs and kisses. But he doesn’t. Not until he’s shown off. It’s embarrassing how much sweat is dripping from him though. He’ll just say you both need a shower.

Ghost

Totally doesn't flex when he hugs you.

Oh you think he does?

If you ask him, you’re wrong. Simon is the most casual of them all.

He’ll just randomly pick you up.

Like throw you over his shoulder, hold you like a koala, bridal style, you name it. Unlike Price, who is more careful about it, Simon has been doing exercises to work on his balance so he can safely carry you down a flight on stairs.

If he catches you staring, its over for him. He’s blushing under his lil mask, acting like he doesnt see you.

If you walk up and open your mouth to talk to him, he’s not listening to a word of that blabbery. He’s focused on the way you watch his legs while he’s in the leg press. How if he flexes a bit more you have the pause so you don’t choke on your words.

If you’re the bold on and you get down to the level of his head because he can’t easily escape this machine right now to say something. I'm thinking like a “Simon, I’m going to need a thigh riding session at 1800 hours. Put that on your damn schedule.” And just walk out. Don’t elaborate.

He’s struggling to get out of the machine, considering chasing after you, possibly having a stroke over it. He’s so flustered he’s down right gasping for air. If he didn’t have shit to do today he’d scoop you up and show you want all these muscles could do just to get you to feel like how flustered he is.

Konig

(see the fic about his wife seeing him lift, its on my masterlist (its pinned))

Gaz

By the time you’ve started dating, you know Gaz is jacked. Just look at him ffs. Anyone could see it.

So you do the only reasonable thing and insist on being his gym partner.

And in turn he will insist on spotting your squats.

If you get so nervous you fail a set his plan springs into action. Bro has it lifted in one hand. He doesn't care if it's a lot. He WILL be lifting it in one hand just so you can see how strong he is.

“Kiss for your savor?” He asks.

“Sure.” You reply, pecking his lips.

But no no no.

“Love, I meant you’re actual savor.” He’d say, flexing that one arm and pointing to it.

Just roll your eyes and do it. It’s easier.

He is GLOWING for the rest of the day. He will now take any and all opportunities to lift heavy things for you.

That big box? Lifted. Come kiss his muscles. Cuz if you don’t he's picking you up and putting you in air jail for being ungrateful.

I feel like because Gaz is so lean its kinda a sleeper build situation? Could be completely using that term wrong but IDC.

Lowkey loves nothing more than you feeling up his abs under his shirt when yall are going to bed. Like your hands feel so nice on them when he’s flexing extra hard so they’re rock solid for you.

First time yall cuddled he almost passed out because he was trying to keep his muscles flexed for so long.

Edit: here’s Keegan

Keegan

Keegan was always walking around the house in the sluttiest tank tops and the lowest waist line sweatpants you’ve ever seen.

He had been showing off since he first met you, so I’ll tell you how it happened.

What did he wear on your first date? Tight ass t shirt and a leather jacket with black jeans.

He essentially was giving a strip show when he slowly took off that jacket, made sure you were watching when he did it with a smug look.

“What wrong, doll? Distracted?” He was definitely flexing hard. Pecs and biceps on full display and don't get me started on how he was clenching to get his abs to show through.

He made sure to get real close to.

Oh dear is that a dirty puddle, let him just… yk… casually pick you up to carry you over the smallest puddle ever.

And when he’s at the gym? You are getting tons of selfies. Those videos of him curling weights that are slightly too heavy all because he knows you like the sound of the groans he makes as he struggles to lift it. Oh he is hip thrusting your weight and a half, so you know you’ll never be too heavy. There’s a video he sent that was 10+ minutes of just him thrusting your weight. You honestly thought it was looped.

Oh and he carries your weight when he runs on the treadmill so he knows he and run and keep you safe if need be.

Here’s Krueger (i got carried away, enjoy)

Krueger:

Sebstian knows he’s already strong.

Picking you up and benching you is his favorite hobby. The way you can't help but giggle and he has to scold you to stop wiggling.

He’s always throw around his weight with you. He knows he’s a big. He loves to lay on you to stop you from moving.

Loves to have you lay on his torso with the weight at his hips as he works on his hip thrusts. Got kicked out of a gym because it was dangerous so he got weights to do it at home. Will do it shirtless so you can trace his tattoos.

Definitely has never told you he committed murder because he doesn’t want you to stop looking at him like he’s your savior as you rub his sore muscles.

God he loves having you rub his muscles, he just tries not to drool as you rub his calves and biceps with all the force your hands can muster to gently rub the knots away. One time he felt so good he almost cried as you rubbed one out of the back of his neck, he got so bricked he couldnt help it he felt like he was gasping for air the pleasure was so intense.

He’d never tell you that tho, no he’d rather die and speak up and tell you how good it feels when your massage his muscles while planting small kisses after every knot you work out. Definitely going to keep asking you to work his aches away… wonder if he can convince you he has a knot in his dick, no no wouldn’t do that to you not yet.

[chrissdollie]

DAD!CHRIS BC THE MATT ONES WERE AMAZINGGGG

i think chris would have maybe three+ kids bc i feel like hed want an army lmao

yk how chris has a few betty boop tees? IMAGINE HIS DAUGHTER DRESSING UP AS BETTY BOOP FOR HALLOWEEN.

daddy daughter dates!! :( like going shopping, mini golfing, eating lunch, etc

hes buying them ice cream all the time

hes the type of dad to show his kids how to treat a woman. he's constantly buying u flowers and winking at the kids when u kiss him on the cheek to thank him

this also means that ur kids have grown accustomed to the constant kissing/pda and they really dont mind it after a while

and lets say they're all planning something devious or like a surprise or something, someone will suggest something involving u and another is like "nah, you know how dad is about her. he'll ground us all for life" which is obviously a joke because chris doesnt believe in grounding his kids

when there's babies, hes always making them giggle by doing silly things like pretending to be a rock star and play on his fake guitar (he makes the sounds with his mouth like a little kid)

u guys take ur kids out a lot. not a single one of em is/was an ipad kid

dancinggg always !!

u guys teach ur kids to cook and it always gets super messy LOL but its so fun

chris doesn't like taylor's swift music.. but his eldest daughter does. she is OBSESSED. she collects the vinyls and CDs and she's always making him listen to folklore's story, about taylor's exes, and her taylor's version predictions. he comes to kinda deal with hearing her music around the house and just comes to accept it lol

[mrstellmeafuckingsecret]

okay need to say that i'm addicted to your intro post.... sirius is brat & u get it. also rosebitchkiller?????? your mind. you've opened my eyes to something. pls yap on it

hi i literally love you youre so cool SO

this made me think bc i usually think of them in a au-ed world ? not a canon thing. but i like making canon things. sawr.

established rosekiller

rosekiller isnt exclusive exclusive . theyre like friends w benefits atp

evan's had a crush on sirius since he like saw him and it never went away

barty thought regulus was cool and when he met sirius he started harboring a small obsession over him

evan and barty are toxic and bad-with-feelings and just generally horrible people (x) and they fight a lot and break up a LOT

while the prank is happening in the marauders' pov, evan and barty break up

sirius comes home for christmas that year even though he usually spends it at hogwarts and barty is haha also there

-i feel like sirius def pities barty. i mean he does canonically yes, but in-school, he just sees a kid who fucking hates his stuck up dad with stupid high expectations who's never content? that w how he hates regulus and projects his worry for regulus onto barty is .

barty gets Attention from Cool Older Brother who's all suave and idgaf and mean and his little obsession turns bigger

sirius "ive never seen healthy forms of romantic love" black is . relishing in barty's obsession.

he hates barty obviously, because what's a good kid doing hanging out w dark art kids ?? but like also Mmm Attention <3

when he's not with his mother, he's with barty

they also like fuck btw like yuckily too bc theyre fucked up

(this all happens over the . like . two week? idk/ christmas break)

when they get back to hogwarts - that's when things get interesting

rosekiller get into a rather violent fight bc evan is like "not only did you commit to another person, its SIRIUS BLACK????"

(barty did not commit . but thats for the bitchkiller post.)

and while this little thing is going on the marauders have healed and sirius is like "bartemius who 💀💀"

uh barty is Angry and Evan is kind of jealous and kind of relieved and kind of horny

evan and barty competing w each other to get sirius' attention

(barty usually gets it, but like it's nothing special)

(the sexual tension is great on e&b's part sirius is just "what do these horny fucks want")at

uhh it turns into three-way flirting

also i didnt metnion but like all three of them HATE each other like evan finds barty obnoxious and sirius a faker (he loves them both) sirius finds evan ew because dark arts and barty a loser because... well. he is. and barty finds them both irritating but unfortunately the pinnacles of male beauty (hes really horny i fear)

uhh smoothly turns into a threesome by the very end of sirius' fifth year

sirius runs away over the summer

back at hogwarts, he doesnt really want to go back to that weird toxic-threesome-thing he had w rosekiller because, again, he doesnt really like them and they dont really like him and they dont even really like each other and maybe sirius likes someone else? remus or james or whoever? and sirius wants to build Healthy relationships?

sirius clings to james a more at the start of hogwarts (naturally) and barty is who sirius is more averse to talking to because he's usually harsher and gets angry easier and is less easier to intimidate

so evan and sirius talk a bit, for once, like have. real conversations. and get to know each other.

sirius has a buzzcut btw (i have STRONG feelings about this) so evan gets one too

evan is Weird and knows in detail about very obscure things and sirius is and always has been attracted to knowledge. while w barty it was more of a debate thing, w evan he can just spill information and listen to evan's too without it being competitive

also evan is more of a bitch so sirius doesnt deem him a threat to his mental health

ALSO !!! barty flips between hypersexual and sex repulsed like a light switch so evan and sirius are used to fucking, like just the two of them, a lot

but barty has fomo so they dont really hangout alone yk

oh and also barty and sirius dont really 'hangout' alone either because evan is very possessive

uhh but like yes they fuck again

its a not-really-friends with benefits situation

no feelings involved !! haha !!

till evan gets the dark mark :3

(barty does too, but sirius doesnt know)

umm !! big !! fight

theyre very violent i didnt mention this but rosekiller have BLOODY fights. sirius isnt very prone to throwing a punch, he usually does enough damage by his tongue alone, but like he gets dragged into it sometimes

(and then JAMES gets involved too because of course he does...)

but like this fight is final and sirius is like "why are you guys even upset were just fucking 💀💀"

and uh btw barty and evan litr never stopped being obsessed w sirius and are just now realizing that sirius just does not gaf like FR how down bad they are (sirius doesnt know theyre like fr in love but like it wouldnt make a difference sawr)

uhh yeah so sirius breaks it off

and barty and evan are like fuck him

but also like i miss fucking him 💔💔

wait a minute we could just ... fuck eachother

for ever

hence rosekiller is birthed

then sirius graduates and literally never thinks about them again

well maybe he does

but only like "god they fucked good i need dick rn" and "i still scars on my waist tf"

and barty and evan are like resentful but also like ugh he doesnt gaf... thats so hot... but also like they found someone who matched their freak (each other) so theyre content

yerp

i hope this makes sense ☹️💔

[ritzcuit]

PART 2 of "looking at all the times datz says something gay or familial that drives me crazy." i guess?! should look at part 1 if you havent yet

soj spoilers ahead obvs. part 1 here in case u missed it

i skipped A LOT between the last post and now, bc datz doesn't show up for. a while. Well like he does a little bit but it's not gay or anything. it doesn't matter. what matters is that we're back in khura'in now, we're apollo now, and athena is here

and um, dhurke is arrested for murder. lol. but talking to athena in one of those "what to do" segments gets this.......

which up until this point i haven't actually seen yet. the noise i made. DATZ HAVING A HEART ATTACK? IM GONNA HAVE A HEART ATTACK!!! WWAAAHHH!! :(!!!!! THINK ABOUT IT!! THINK ABOUT DATZ SCARED OUT OF HIS MIND FOR DHURKE'S SAFETY. THINK ABOUT IT RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!! i don't exactly know what "wanted datz to go to him" means exactly. go to dhurke? well it doesnt matter i guess. cus the way they know damn well datz would freak out and try to bust dhurke out of jail...Sniffle... Sob........ i love datz so much.... loyalest man alive fr dont play with me

and then a Lot more bullshit happens, but good news;

theyre at the defiant dragons hideout again ^_^ with the photos ^_^ if you investigate them, you get this! here comes datz jumping at the chance to talk abt his (friend's) family again. the day WEEEEEEEEEE all went out fishing. shut up. WE!!! i always knew datz was there, in my heart, taking the photo... earlier, dhurke says "the three of us [dhurke, aj, yuty] living in the mountains", but clearly datz came by often enough. WE! WE WENT FISHING! WEEE!!! its just so easy to imagine... datz insisting they take a photo .. i cant take it... how many times was datz there. fishing w them. helping cook dinner and dealing w two rambunctious boys...crying

he also takes the chance to be hurt over yuty again.. datz has a lot to say about nahyuta.

investigating the sign [sic] gives datz a chance to geek about how cool dhurke is. "his fame as a lawyer spread far and wide!" i'm sure that's how they intended for datz knows about dhurke's lawyer days, but again, i like to believe datz was his weirdgirl. he probably was the advertising campaign if we're honest 😭

now we're talking to datz directly again ^_^ asking him about the sahdmadhi law offices. "and i quote" is so annoying. i know he's doing a deep voiced impression of dhurke right there. Stop memorizing shit he says. Gay

then! he says dhurke mentioned he wants apollo to take over the offices one day...which cute and whatever, but this isnt abt dhurke's dadliness, this is about datz being such a FUCKING GEEK! he's talking to dhurke directly, right, so why are you gassing him up 😭😭 TO HIMSELF! HE'S DHURKE! "must've been because of you, dhurke!" he's too much of a good friend. he's convinced everyone thinks dhurke is as cool as He thinks dhurke is. it's insane. the fanboy behavior will never end

it's nice to see dhurke and datz interact too. we really don't see much of that in this game. dhurke always seems kind of understated with datz as compared to when he's being Boisterous Dad or Rebel Leader in public... how many quiet moments did they share together... just sharing news and shooting the shit...dhurke doesn't have to put on big leader charisma 'cause datz uplifts him no matter what. Gay

Why Do You Know That, Datz

well, it's obvious why he knows that. BC HE WAS THEEEERREEEEEE of course, as a friend of someone, you wouldn't be totally blind to how they raise their kids, but we KNOW datz was there running around! paying attention. noticing these things. crazy. knowing another man's parenting style is crazy. "that much i'm sure of" knowing another man's Thoughts is crazy. Gay

also just makes me emo :( datz rly got front row seats to dhurke's parental anguish. i can imagine a hundred convos just like the earlier one, where dhurke regrets it, and datz is trying to cheer him up, same as always ...

datz has a lot to say about nahyuta. (asking him about nahyuta obviously) actually it isnt that much. but it's so funny. him being a hypeman for both sahdmadhis is so cute... and also him seeming frustrated that he doesn't know Why yuty is acting this way...'cause he cares :( he cares for his yuty :( CAUSE HE HELPED RAISE THAT DAMN KID!

ill smack dhurke rn he pisses me off so bad sometimes. datz is out here worrying over YOUR CHILD! and you're leaving him out to dry :( datz really loves that family...thinking about him trying to nudge answers out of dhurke, but respecting his boundaries all the while...GRRRRRR he's too good for you dhurke. you need to treasure what you have

asking datz about apollo's biological father leads to another Datz Exposition Dump in which i lose my mind bc he remembers too much about this fucking family. it's almost like he cares for them or something. "dhurke's the kinda guy who can become%$^%&#$%^" THIS ISNT ABOUT DHURKE QUIT GUZZLING HIM FOR 5 SECONDS! STOP!

this part is key to me cause, again, WEEEEEEE. *WE!* it proves that datz had been friends with dhurke before anything happened... a lot of his Datz Yapping could have just been recited stories, stuff he knew secondhand, but being close enough with dhurke to help him look for an orphaned baby's mother While fending off accusations of terrorism..... it's key. real ones get it. it isnt just "oh datz is a family friend" it's "datz was there at the beginning of everything". before the dragons started at all! Gay

presenting dhurke's law book gets this. not explicitly dhurke guzzling rly but idgaf. I also refuse it being metaphorical. give datz a gay chest tattoo. COWARD! just imagine it. how intimate it would be... who was doing the tattoos for the dragons at that time anyway? a stick n poke by dhurke would be cool and badass, but then asking dhurke to do a whole chest piece on his best friend... dhurke's like, "are you sure? that's ... pretty intense," but datz's burning passion for the revolution is intense, isn't it? fellas is it gay to impart your personal symbol of revolution onto your best friend's chest by candlelight? because i'm making it by candlelight now? Hello

presenting amara's assassination file. "i got the whole thing memorized" i should smack him genuinely. ive had enough of this man for real. CUS WHY ARE YOU MEMORIZING THAT? his loyalty knows no bounds. also datz sad about yuty again.. omfg i know he is SO SAD about that boy

he is genuinely the sahdmadhi's number one fan. him being dhurke's boyfriend would be less gay than what he has going on now. like despite everything there's still Something to be proud of yuty for...even if it's being a turncoat enldkfngd ... datz cant help it...that's his lil baby 😭

there isn't a lot left in the way of like, anything, but there is this

datz coming in at the last second with Dhurke Can Do No Wrong again. not very gay but i do like them existing together :)

he's just so. ugh. i wonder what happened here so bad. how did dhurke and datz meet up at all? but dhurke asked datz to break him out and datz was like OKAY YAY ^_^ bc he probably was itchy about dhurke being in custody at all. sorry aj! objectively it looks bad but datz is, i think, incapable of seeing dhurke in a critical eye, so he just assumes dhurke's Got A Plan and he's totally coming back 'cause why wouldn't he :) he doesn't even think dhurke got caught again or anything. hes like. well surely dhurke did escape, because he's dhurke and he's the coolest most capable amazing perfect man in existence. Obviously

(those who know..)

:(

honestly, a little underwhelming all things considered, he bounces back immediately right after this because he is A Freak. well, no, it's bc he knows damn well it's what dhurke would have wanted, dragon yielding and whatnot. but seeing his sad little face devastates me. he tries to put on a determined face at first, only to revert back to this sad pensive sprite... datz... honey....

how freaky is it that datz was running around with the ghost of his bestie without even realizing it? well, that dhurke's been dead for so long... even "you're a sight for sore eyes" is with ghost dhurke, right?!

oh he got over it

"like how dhurke always wanted" WHAT ABOUT YOU. DATZ. YOU. AS A PERSON. YOU ALSO WANTED THIS. YOU COULDNT SAY "WE"? well it's in memory of dhurke, right? to honor his death? that makes sense. surely this is the last time he attributes something to dhurke specifically

STOP

and that, actually, is it. well roughly? considering i found a new section of dialogue that i totally missed up until this point, i wouldn't be surprised if something slipped my mind. I also have no idea if this was worth anyone's time, but i had fun with it anyway :3

if u read this far then cheers!! if u have any thoughts abt these specific morsels then tell me about them..!! again, like, i know it is Literally datz's purpose as a character to be the sahdmadhi lore dump in lieu of dhurke and yuty, but that just means they created an uncle who loves that family with all his heart. if we ever EVER!!!!! got any canon acknowledgement of khura'in again, which i doubt we will, i'd pray and beg for another crumb of datz content. please...

[pricesprettylittlehousewife]

somethin somethin, Price with a daughter.

this just hit me idk why or how. Kids be nice to your mom and dad-uhmm idk warnings: bad relestionship with kid, worse one with parent, single parent!Price, Daughter!Reader, SLIIIIGHT pricenik bc yes.

issue one: Vaping

"Give it-now."

Price held his hand out to her and she rolled her eyes.

"Why?"

Price gritted hi teeth. Of course his kid would be like him-just trendier and whatnot.

"Just a vape, dad. Not even anything bad."

"Just a vape?! Girl, it's nic-"

"Oh i don't care, Dad! Ugh, your just like Miss Jensen!"

Miss Jensen-her teacher? So she's been talked to before-and unnotified? ...Sketchy.

"Darling, please. Your far too young to be hitting that-your only fifteen, Love!"

"Dont pet name me, I ain't your dead wife!"

and she walked away. Taking her bag and the fucking vape with her.

"Fucking god, I hate him..."

Issue two: no manners

"Ha ha, noo! C'mon, Sal! He's cute an everythin' but he's older!"

she kept giggling and Price heard teh word "older" and walked into the room, only to find his daughter and some random boy flirting.

"Y/n-"

"Oh greeeeat, your home from work. Hi, John."

"Young lady-"

"Can you leave please? Thank you, ugh."

issue three: Jealousy

"Hey...Sweetie?"

"What now, Price?"

"...Do you...wanna go shopping?"

"So you want to spend time with me now? Pfft, fuck off, John."

"...just thought i'd ask before i went out tonight with Nik-"

"Your boyfirend? So Pizza for dinner again? Jeez, John...and you think I'd call you dad. HA!"

she got up, pushed past him and walked away.

Price siged and ran a hand through his hair.

"...This is all my fault."

issue four: Pettiness

"...So you Nik?"

Nikolai nodded.

"Da-err, yes."

"...Nice to meet you, I'll be in my room, dont come in."

"Y/n. Behave, please."

"Why? You brought him home to shag him, no? So i'll be in my room to let you. Headphones on and everything, bye."

"...is she always like this?"

"yes...ever since her mom died."

"how did he die?"

"...did it herself. Overdose...I was off with you and one four one on an Op."

"..."

"i get a call later that night, "Mom's dead, left a letter explaining why and your the fucking reason, Dad!" ...thats what she said."

"I'm sure-"

"My wife was petty in every way known to mankind."

"...Ahh."

idk what this was like i said before. I just wanted to make an oc for price, like his daughter but couldnt so i turned this into an x reader. your welcome.

[sobbingstars]

SEASON 4 UMBRELLA ACADEMY SPOILERS!!!

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Hi! WHAT THE FUCK! My hot takes on this latest season bc if I don’t say these I’m gonna go insane.

Luthor: becoming a dancer was really funny. It was also kinda nice bc he was so ashamed of his body b4 when he was part monkey, so it’s good to see him being more comfortable in his own skin. And speaking of him being part monkey, that had NOTHING TO DO WITH HIS POWERS. His powers are SUPER STRENGTH, his father INJECTED HIM WITH MONKEY DNA OR SMT TO SAVE HIS LIFE. Made NO SENSE!

Diego: Diego being an absent/emotionally neglectful/bad father made NO SENSE! We saw him with Stan, he learned to be a father. Plus, he had his own issues with his dad, of course he would mentally do everything he could to avoid being his father. And also, him and Lila being in an unhappy marriage was so weird. Like, man was literally obsessed w/ her in season 3. What???

Alison: So we decided to not address any of her wrongs and just forgive her. She ASSAULTED LUTHOR. She tried to KILL VICTOR. SHE KILLED HARLAN. SHR TEAMED UP WITH REGGIE. Nothing??? Just forgive her for reasons??? That being said, Claire bear you were STUNNING thank you for being here and thank you Millie Davis, you were my childhood. But also, girl??? Show some support for your uncle. He needs help sometimes, just bc he’s immortal doesn’t mean he doesn’t have feelings :(

Klaus: I actually think they didn’t go super wrong with Klaus. Him becoming super paranoid after losing his powers made sense bc he died like every other day and just didn’t notice bc he just kept coming back, so I’d be afraid of everything too. And I think him being scared to have his powers again bc he was afraid he’d relapse is honestly so in character. That being said, fake that he didn’t even consider talking to Dave once he was sober and had his powers and wasn’t actively trying to stop the end of the world. And yall don’t even know how upset I was when he started levitating with his SHOES ON. NOT COMIC ACCURATE.

Five: WORDS DONT DESCRIBE MY RAGE. BECOMING A CIA AGENT? WHEN THE WORLD WASN’T ACTIVELY ENDING AND HE COULD JUST RETIRE? YOU KNOW AT LEAST ON OF HIS SIBLINGS WOULD LET HIM STAY. AND FALLING IN LOVE WITH LILA?? IT MADE NO SENSE, WAS SO OUT OF CHARACTER EHRN HE LITERALLY WAS LIKE ‘Lila would be stupid to throw away her happy life’ AND PROCEEDED TO WRECK HER HAPPY LIFE? I GET THAT IT WAS SEVEN YEARS BUT GOD DAMN FIVE, YOU WERE MARRIED TO DOLORES FOR THIRTY! AND THEY DIDNT EVEN BRING HER UP! NOT ONCE! AND JUST GIVING UP AND LETTING THE WORLD END? FOR FUNSIES? ABANDONING HIS FAMILY? NOT GIVING TWO SHITS? MAN ENDED THE WORLD THREE TIMES TRYING TO SAVE HIS FAMILY! HIS FAMILY IS ONE OF THE ONLY THINGS HE CARES ABT AND HE WOULD NEVER EVEN CONSIDER GOING AFTER HIS BROTHERS WIFE! Five Hargreeves, they could never make me hate you, but what the FUCK!

Ben: So unrealistic that he didn’t break down any his siblings all being dead once. We deserved a heart between him and Five where Ben was like ‘All my family is dead’ and Fives like ‘I know how that feels’ bc his siblings were dead for 40+ years. Instead, he just had no character development at all and just died bc of a girl he met once. The only reason I was a little sad when he died was bc of season one and two Ben who was so sweet and amazing and season three Ben who just wanted to be loved and accepted. They didn’t even have any relationship development between him and Jennifer.

Victor: I’m sorry, he owns a BAR and was an awful boyfriend?? WHAT!? I was hoping we were gonna have this emotional scene where he plays the Violin again bc he hasn’t played it since he ENDED THE WORLD in season one, and he would be happy bc Violin was a genuine passion of his and he was gonna no longer be afraid. And being a bad boyfriend?? Unrealistic, he was so kind and good with kids??? Are you kidding??? That being said I really liked when he stood up to Reggie. That was rlly funny.

Lila: Yall know what I’m gonna say. You just KNOW. I GET that transitioning from full time assassin to full time mom would be a hard switch but you’re telling me she WOULDN’T have ANY sort of job? NONE??? With all her family being back in her life? She’d just sit in the house? And she wouldn’t sit in the house and be unhappy. She would absolutely call Diego out on his shit and complaining problem and he’d be like ‘Yes ma’am.’ Bc their relationship was so fun in season two and three and then they made it into a no-fun, unhappy marriage, and Lila just had so little of her original personality. And her liking Five was so weird. She sees him as a KID. He LOOKS like a kid. Made no sense.

Reggie: Actually wasn’t a total ass this season. Got into a malewife/girlboss relationship. Managed to actually have feelings. That being said, why how the fuck was he an ALIEN IN SEASON TWO??? I get that his wife was the one with the weird power things, but they just??? Never explained it??? What was going on??? I was so confused this ENTIRE SEASON.

[bigassbowlingballhead]

so we all know that my dreams are weirdly hyper realistic and plot driven so buckle the fuck up.

number one: everything (like, the rules of reality) was the same as real life except i guess my bf didnt exist (sad but necessary for the plot i suppose). im at thanksgiving at my parents house, which is a weekend long affair. tzp and redacted are married and also there bc they are my friends i guess. im definitely better friends w taylor than redacted but redacted and i get along and like each other. okay. the scene is set.

so, im preparing dinner with my dad and aunts like usual. taylor and redacted have slept in but taylor comes out to help eventually. he is fresh from a shower and wearing a very tight shirt. we talk while i cook and it’s clear that i need to fuck this man like, yesterday. within the dream logic, this is not the first time ive fucked around with him — this is a thing that we do. go me!

so we’re like okay, where can we go, bc i have a one story house and it’s full of family members at thanksgiving. i mean FULL. and redacted is sleeping so we dont wanna bother him, but there is literally nowhere that we can go that a family member wouldnt also be there and see us (damn you, open floor plans!!!) so what else can we do but go outside behind the pool shed, obviously.

now, it IS november in philadelphia, so it’s not WARM, but we’re making it work. i got this man bent over in a tiny corner of backyard, shirt fully off, making him see god. weve got our shoes on and mostly pants except for the important parts. hes not making as much noise as i want him to make (bc duh, we gotta be quiet), but im doing my damnedest to make him squeak, so im touching every inch of him that i can. i remember that i was thinking “i wish i had another hand to grab his hair, bc i already have one hand on his balls and the other on his dick and im not willing to give up on either of those for the sake of making him arch his back.” obviously this was a tough decision by me, but what are you gonna do. also at this point important to mention that i dont actually remember all the details, just flashes of stuff and general vibes. i was definitely like “hurry up and come man, we are on borrowed time here,” but taylor was apparently in no rush no matter how much i played with his dick. also at some point i put my hand on his stomach and could feel his abs and how he was moving every time i did and whew. that was hot.

so TRAGICALLY we were interrupted before the grand finale. i am not pleased but hey, if it’s time for dinner then it’s time for dinner. so i sit next to tzp at dinner and redacted sits on the other side and im TRYING to enjoy my MEAL but those two are definitely doing something under the table. whores.

things get a little weird and dreamscape-y here so i’ll skip most of dinner but the only relevant plot point that came up is i found out about something thats been seriously irritating me at work is happening again and so i was kinda pissed. but anyway.

so after dinner all the cousins decide to get in the pool which is insane to do bc it is NOVEMBER and my parents never even have the pool open at thanksgiving, but it’s my dream so fuck weather patterns in guess. so we’re all in the pool and taylor has clearly still not gotten off and redacted and i are having a good time messing with him, you know how it goes, standard pool shenanigans but nothing too bad bc my parents are RIGHT THERE so. keep it pg. but after we go inside?? oh all bets are OFF.

now here’s where things go bad for me. we go inside and we’re only in our towels and we’re all three looking for a place to fuck and we CANT FIND ONE. it’s only a three bedroom house and all three bedrooms are occupied. for some fucking reason we try my parents room first (which im glad was occupied bc i would not be down to fuck in my parents room, ick), but my little sister and my cousin are in there watching a movie with the little cousins, so thats a big fat no thank you. then we go to my sister’s room which yeah, i wouldnt feel GREAT about fucking in there, but it’s a redacteds threesome on the table and if i have to do it i will. but thats where my uncle and aunt are sleeping and hes in there napping after all the pie so thats another no go. so now im pretty pissed off bc of the work thing and also pls why cant we find a place to just FUCK.

so we go into my old bedroom and im thinking this will be fine, this is where redacted and taylor are sleeping anyway, (why didnt we go there first? whos to say) this will be open and we can get down. but we get in there and two people ive never met before are in the bed. what.

so my family tends to take in a lot of strays around the holidays. if you dont have a place to go for thanksgiving and you know a relative of mine, you are automatically invited to my parents house. theres always like 5-6 unrelated people at dinner just bc my uncle or cousin or whomever showed up and was like “i have extras!” and my mom is always like “dope! come in and eat!” it’s a lovely representation of the welcoming nature of my family and culture and it’s something that i always love to see around the holidays but it is also currently FUCKING ME OVER BC I JUST WANT TO BANG THESE MEN IN PEACE!!!

so im like “excuse me, with all due respect, who the fuck are you.” and the one guy was immediately rude (sir you are in MY BED) and was like “your mom said we could stay here so fuck off.” and im like??? YOU fuck off?? but then another part of me is like “no, your mother raised you better than that, you need to be welcoming to people so they dont feel unwanted.” the thing is that at this moment they are in fact VERY unwanted. so taylor is also pissed and redacted is trying to calm him down but keep in mind that taylor hasnt finished still so hes a bit bitchy. and redacted is like “what if we just went and got a hotel room somewhere,” and im like NO, we are in nothing but our bathing suits, we are all horny and ready to go, this is HAPPENING.

so i go back into my parents room and i ask my cousin hey have you seen my mom and also maybe you guys could watch the movie in the basement bc desperate times call for desperate measures and im not gonna fuck in my parents bed but maybe the floor would be fine. and shes like i think your mom is doing the dishes but why do you need a bedroom all to yourself? and i just gave her a look and i was like come on. why do you think. and she asked “ohh, okay, so wait, where do you see this going with taylor?” and i was like “oh it’s not going anywhere, he’s married to redacted, we just fuck around. it’s great, sometimes redacted joins, sometimes not, but it’s always a good time.” and she was somewhat scandalized and i was like oh right. within the context of my family that would be an objectively insane thing to just drop like that.

so anyway. after that the dream gets all weird and dreamy (there was some plotline with kamala harris i think? i think i worked for her? but she was actually also my irl boss interchangeably? idk). but thats the story of how i fucked taylor at thanksgiving in my subconscious. also i just remembered that while i was fucking him and had my hand on his stomach i could feel the outline of my strap through his abs. have a good day i love you 😘

the outline of your strap though his abs is CRAZY GIA. i love it.

also where'd the strap come from, was it stored behind the pool shed for safe keeping, are you just strapped at all times always ready to bend over a gay man? (me next)

[doyouevenshipbr0]

top 10 strongest airbenders

this list is tough. we don’t see many airbenders at all throughout the show. but ive ranked all the other elements, so here’s this list now!

let’s go

*gyatso*- i dont want to put a nunber next to his name because i have 0 concrete evidence as to where he would rank. if i had to guess i feel like he’d be 2-3? but i just can’t put him there based off vibes alone lol. with that being said, i still have to give him credit. there is no number 10 lol sorry.

9. bumi- yeah he kinda sucks as an airbender lmao. i loveeeee bumi and to be so honest i really really REALLY wish he had stayed a nonbender. it was such an important part of his character and what made him so interesting. but alas he has to be an airbender. boring lame boo!!!!! but he does do a few cool things. good job bumi.

8. opal- boringggg snoozeeeee. i don’t really like opal. but she airbends which is cool. i dont remember her doing anything significant at all as an airbender though lol. maybe that’s on me because i dont care about her character so i just forgot, but from what i remember she’s a good airbender, just nothing special.

7. kai- kind of a similar situation to opal where he doesn’t seem to be special but i will say i think him and airbending compliment each other very well. he naturally is able to utilize airbending which is honestly reminiscent of aang to me a tiny bit. obviously he’s not on his level at all but the vibes are still there! but yeah other than natural ability he doesn’t have anything else of note imo. it’s kinda like he just plateaus after the timeskip i feel like? idk i shoulve made these lists immediately after my most recent rewatch lol.

6. meelo- hate him HAHAHAHA sorryyyyyyy. his fart stuff is so annoying. however i think its obvious that all of tenzins kids are great airbenders and it comes pretty naturally to them. so yeah all three are excellent he is just the least impressive to me.

5. ikki- i loveeeeeeee ikki omg. but she’s very similar to meelo to me in that she is clearly naturally gifted and practically a master airbender but i don’t remember her doing anything really impressive that would make her any higher. she gets to be higher than meelo because i like her way more and she doesn’t fartbend. congrats ikki!

4. zaheer- im kind of annoyed that he’s this high. like he should not be that good of an airbender but here he is i guess. he gave almost everybodyyyyy a run for their money during his season and was kicking lots of ass. idk why he’s so good, i guess because he was spiritually connected to airbending before he became an airbender, but he definitely is amazing. mf can fly which no one else can do. also the way he killed the earth queen was awesomeeeee! wish more airbenders could be more unhinged. but yeah he can’t be higher bc he lacks a fuck ton of experience.

3. jinora- people argue she’s the best airbender in tlok and ok she mightttt beeeee because of her spiritual abilities, but i do think she lacks some combat skills and experience. with that being said though her spiritual abilities make her insanely op. im just saying like if u average out her impeccable spiritual skills with her just good combat skills, she gets number 3 imo. but she is obviously a master who earns her tattoos at such a young age so that’s why she’s here! also i think in her adulthood she will surpass her dad, but she aint there yet!

2. tenzin- gonna get his con out of the way first, he has little to no spiritual connection. which i dont think is a HUGE detriment but it is a detriment nonetheless and it’s why i also kinda flip flop between him and jinora and who i think is the better airbender. but today, for me, it’s tenzin. what he lacks in spiritual ability he makes for in strength, agility, technique, IQ, skill, utilization, and literally any other feat you could think of. remember when he was making zaheer look like an absolute amateur? that was awesome. yeah he is the best airbender that isn’t an avatar in the whole series.

1. aang- LOLLLL im not following my own rulessss butttttt idc. there arent many airbenders to choose from anyways and for a majority of the first book we really only know aang as an airbender anyway soooo im bending my rules lol. i dont feel any need to give a big fat response. he is not like any airbender we ever see throughout the entire show and it is not even close.

[taste-your-silhouette]

Hello, dove! how are you? I saw the "if not for you" work you did and loved it! i dont know if you are taking requests or not, but i was wondering if you could do some hcs or a small imagine where Damiano has a younger sister (23), and she follows him everywhere bc she hasnt seen him in a while and wants to tell him about a boy she likes and how to confront said boy. But then he gets mad at her by accident from stress and then it gets pretty angsty and ends with fluffyness! TYSM! take care <3

Hi, cutie! I'm doing great, how about you? I loved to know you loved "If not for you!! Thanks for your request, your idea was awesome, and I had a blast writing this fic, I hope you enjoy it 💙

Apri la vela, dai, viaggia leggera

Words: ~2161 The same A/N: Please, forgive me again if you come across any errors while reading. (y/d/n) your date's name. 

You had just arrived in Rome. After enduring 3 grueling years in Vancouver pursuing an extension course, you were finally back home, near your beloved family. Those 3 years would have been insufferable if it weren't for one extraordinary individual.

(y/d/n) and you crossed paths at the beginning of the course. During the first year, you were simply pals. You were still recovering from a platonic love, and although taking the course offered a great escape, it could be downright challenging at times. You longed for home constantly, especially for your brother Damiano. He was your favorite human being, your superhero, and being apart from him for these 3 years was incredibly tough. Not being able to chat with him before bedtime and share your daily experiences was difficult. With the remarkable success of Måneskin, you adore the band and words can't express how proud you are of Damiano, Vic, Ethan, and Thomas. Yet, there remains a twinge of sadness, knowing that your brother is not by your side to offer advice and fulfill his role as the older sibling.

As Damiano's schedule was hectic, and communication was challenging due to the tour and its finals, your parents played a vital role in ensuring your homecoming was flawless. With Damiano's return too, everything would be as if it were an ordinary day until you arrived back home.

I'm at the front entrance, could you kindly open it for me? You sent a text to your mom, and within moments, she and your dad were beaming with joy that you had arrived.

After numerous hugs and a few tears, his parents called out to Damiano, who was upstairs, enticing him with the best trick in the book: using pizza as a lure.

"Finally, I was famished," Damiano grumbled as he descended the stairs. And when you came into his line of sight of him, he let out a scream followed by an expletive.

He dashed towards you and scooped you up in a bear hug.

"How? When did you get here?" he inquired, stepping back slightly to get a better look at you. "Look at you, all grown up!" He embraced you tightly once again, holding on a little longer this time.

After Damiano, his parents, and you shared more hugs and the atmosphere settled, the four of you gathered around the table to indulge in the pizzas that had conveniently arrived just moments before you. As you enjoyed the meal, you caught up on various topics, skillfully avoiding the secret you had been keeping from Damiano.

"Damiano, how long are you planning to stay at home?" you inquired.

"I have this whole week off, but on Friday, we're flying to Barcelona. The tour is in Europe now," he replied, helping himself to another slice of pizza.

"Hmm, that sounds cool. Can I join you?"

He glanced at you suspiciously, trying to gauge whether you wanted to come along to simply enjoy the show or if there was something more to it. Eventually, he gave in to the idea of spending more time with you, making up for the three years apart and his absence.

//

The days until Friday flew by, and you had a great time with your family and made some new friends. Even Vic, Ethan, and Thomas came over to your place to throw a small, wild homecoming party.

On Friday, Damiano woke you up with a scream.

"Rise and shine! If you want to keep up with the pace around here, you'll need to get up before the sun," he shouted, bursting into laughter and tossing a teddy bear at you.

You despised waking up early. Why not just tell him about (y/d/n) and go back to sleep?

Ahhh, the temptation is strong, but NO!

You gather the essence of your love for (y/d/n). Take a refreshing shower and grab the bags you packed for a few days away.

Throughout these days, you and Damiano had incredible moments together. You played tons of video games, he took you on a shopping spree where you got a whole new wardrobe, you binge-watched the Harry Potter movies, and finally finished Game of Thrones (a series you started watching three years ago but didn't complete due to the events that unfolded in your lives). You cherished the shared experiences and wished for a chance to update Damiano about your journey with (y/d/n) over the past three years. You were certain Damiano would adore (y/d/n), but you also anticipated his reaction when he discovered you were dating someone, especially someone living in a different country.

You're at the airport, patiently waiting for the Barcelona flight to board. Meanwhile, Damiano is peacefully snoring on your shoulder while you're texting with (y/d/n). It's becoming increasingly challenging to find the right moment to tell Damiano about your relationship with (y/d/n). (y/d/n) is eagerly anticipating his reaction, and each day that passes without you revealing the truth feels like a strain on your connection. It weighs heavily on your heart, causing aching discomfort.

"Y/N, are you embarrassed by me or something? 'Cause I just don't get it..." This question has been lingering in your mind ever since your last phone call with (y/d/n)

on Wednesday morning.

Feeling frustrated with the whole situation, you put your phone aside and gaze ahead. Vic, who is sitting across from you, notices your distress and furrows her brow.

"Everything okay?" she asks, without the sound of her voice.

You simply shake your head and rest it against Damiano's head, closing your eyes.

//

When you arrive at the hotel where the five of you and the whole team will be staying, Vic informs the front desk that you and she will be sharing a room.

"No, she won't. She's my little sister, I've been away from her for 3 years, she's staying with me," Damiano argues.

"She can't stand being attached to you anymore, you're so annoying," Vic retorts.

Just as you were about to speak up, Vic stops you, grabbed your arm, and takes the room card.

"Next time, be quicker, dummy," she playfully taunts Damiano, laughing.

You both laughed as he playfully cursed at the two of you.

As you enter the room, you plop down on the bed and let out a sigh.

"Okay," Vic joins you, sitting next to you and looking at you, "spill the tea."

And that's exactly what you do.

//

"Y/N, you gotta tell to Damiano soon, I get that you might be scared of his reaction, but it's inevitable, you know? Carrying this secret around will only strain your relationship with (y/d/n) and fuck off Damiano, whether he likes it or not, you and (y/d/n) will live happily ever after," Vic advised, playfully running her fingers through your hair.

You chuckled and couldn't help but laugh at her candidness.

"Worst case scenario, I'm right here in your room," you responded, still giggling.

"Exactly! And we can hit up some awesome party too."

Both of you burst into laughter as you reminisced about the last wild party she and the boys threw to celebrate your homecoming.

"No way! So, I'm gonna go have a chat with Damiano."

You leave Vic by herself in the room and head to Damiano's room, but he's not there. So, as you make your way down to the hotel lounge, you call him, but he doesn't answer. Finally, you spot him at the hotel reception, near the exit.

"Hey, frate!" you shout at him, and he looks at you with an expression on his face that you couldn't decipher quickly enough, as it soon fades away.

You approach him, but before you can start talking, he interjects:

"What's up? Talk fast, I gotta sort some things out."

"Oh, nothing, I wanted to have a chat with you."

He's busy texting someone while you're trying to talk to him, but he glances up at you and responds:

"Can't right now, I'm heading out with Ethan, ciao."

Without another word, he turns his back on you and joins Ethan outside the hotel, and they leave without making much noise.

//

Hours passed quickly after you returned to the room frustrated for not being able to speak with Damiano. At least now you can talk to (y/d/n) who is trying to talk to Damiano about you guys but he's just too busy for that. That reason is better than having no reason to tell why you haven't talked to Damiano yet.

You're with Damiano in the dressing room, assisting him in getting dressed for the show. This would be the perfect moment to talk about (y/d/n) with him if he wasn't so annoyed. He's fed up with having to sing "Beggin" all the time when they have plenty of other songs they could perform, and he's griping about the in-ear headphones that are bothering his ear.

"You're tightening that ropes too much," he complains about the ropes you're fastening around his thigh.

"If I don't tighten it, your pants will come off during the show because it'll come undone," you retort.

"Like I've never gone pantless before. You're fucking squeezing me!" He screams the curse word, and you give up, leaving him alone in the dressing room.

You find Vic and Ethan making their way backstage, and you join them.

"I can't handle Damiano and his diva antics anymore," you roll your eyes.

Ethan and Vic burst into laughter, joining you in making fun of Damiano.

"Let him go pantless if he wants, he's into that," Ethan adds, concluding the joke as you reach backstage, where the sound of screaming fans grows louder.

This is the best part of tagging along to their shows—right before the performance, you can feel the anticipation and longing of so many fans. Damiano is fashionably late to the backstage scene, looking like a true rockstar.

He may be an idiot sometimes, but he's still your brother, and you can't help but feel a surge of pride in your heart for him.

As they make their way to the stage, Damiano catches your eye, winking and flashing you a smile, all set to rock the crowd.

When the gig wraps up and everyone changes their outfits, they suggest hitting up an Italian joint.

Damiano's annoyance has faded away, and the vibes are on point. The four of you are buzzing with energy, enjoying each other's company after an amazing performance. Yet, deep down, the knowledge that you're keeping something from Damiano and the fear that (y/d/n) might think you're ashamed of them is truly heart-wrenching.

"Y/N!" Damiano shouts your name. "Are you deaf? I've been calling you forever!"

"What's up? I was lost in thought, and you interrupted my flow," you grumble.

He casually drapes his arm over your shoulders as you stroll together. The restaurant is just up ahead, and little do you know, it's bustling with life and radiating vibrant energy. That's your destination.

"I've got a question for you, sis," Damiano murmurs in your ear. "Do you know that jerk?"

He points at some random dude near the restaurant, except it's not just any random dude—it's your special someone. IT'S (y/d/n) !!

"What the hell? How is this even possible?" you blurt out, not waiting for Damiano's response.

You sprint towards (y/d/n) and wrap him in a tight embrace.

"I've missed you," he whispers in your ear as you hold each other close.

"I’ve missed you so much! How did you...?" You're cut off by Damiano, who has caught up with the two of you.

"Y/N, you've got plenty of great qualities, but being discreet and cautious isn't one of them. I noticed you chatting with him all the damn time, and you never mentioned a relationship until things got messy and I got pissed off."

"He slid into my DMs on Instagram," (y/d/n) chimes in, his arms still wrapped around you. "It all happened so fast. He even bought me a plane ticket to come here."

Damiano nods in understanding and adds:

"Since you didn't spill the beans, Vic provided me with some juicy details, like his name and the fact that he's your boyfriend, isn't he? Don't underestimate my stalking skills. And I needed to know who treated you so damn well while I was out."

You can't help but burst into laughter. This all feels like a crazy dream!

"I thought you'd lose your shit when I told you," you admit.

Damiano raises an eyebrow and responds, "Yeah, I had a little freakout, but Mom and Dad talked some sense into me. It's all good. I just want you to be happy, Y/N."

You grinned and embraced Damiano tightly, giving him a big hug.

"You're the absolute coolest brother ever! Love you, bro!"

Damiano burst into a boisterous laugh, his signature trademark.

"Love you too! Now let's head inside and grab some grub. I'm starving, and I want to hear the whole story of you two."

[valscodblog]

"Trick Or Treat!" Simon Riley x Oc

SO IT'S SPOOKY SEASON Y'ALL AND I LOVE ME SOME SPOOKY SEASON FUN SO HERE'S A HALLOWEEN FIC FOR Y'ALL!!

I SUMMON: @needa-sum-luvn @thebunnednun @skauni @staytrueblue (dk if you even want a tag on my fics that dont have price but oh well) @seconds-on-the-clock @writing-with-moss

Warnings: Maybe possibly ooc simon?..I just write him happier that he has a family-okay?!nothing else ,It's just some good ol' fluff bc they have kids here. SUCKY ASS ENDING BC I GOT TIRED AND I HAVN'T SLEPT IN LIKE-TWO DAYS OKAY??? IM SORRYYYYYY :(

"Mom! Get ready! We're all all ready!" James shouted, running into his mother's bedroom. Ruby and Simon were putting on each other's pumpkin heads and Ruby laughed. "We are getting ready, James. Calm down. Trick or treating starts in thirty minuets. We have time, Amor." Simon just chuckled and grabbed his pumpkin head. He put it on himself and smiled when it was on. "Damn...when was the last time i hid my face around the house, Lovie?" directing the question to Ruby, who sighed and shook her head. "Years...and this better be the last time!" "Yes ma'am."

Ruby nodded and said, "Jeez...how do you see out of these?" as she looked around in her pumpkin head. "I dunno, Ma," James said, shrugging. The ten year old then ran out of the room to see if his sisters were ready or not. "HEY! SISSIES! YOU READY-?"

"GET OU', JAMES!" "MUMMY! JAMES DIDN'T KNOCK!"

Oh dear lord....Ruby walked out of her room and sighed. "James..." "I said sorry, mom!" "Okay. Girls, he's said sorry. And are you two ready?" Both the girls nodded. "I'm mike!" "And I'm Sully!"

Simon poked his head into the rooms and his daughters screamed. "MOM-BEHIND YOU!" Ruby laughed and said, "It's your dad, kids. Calm down." Sapphire blinked and then asked, "Is it, Mum?" Ghost took of his mask and said, "Aye, Saphhie. Jus' me." Saphhire giggled and said, "Dad, mum said you were gonna be a ghost!" Simon huffed, "No-I'm the pumpkin king. Mum's the queen of the patch." Ruby rolled her eyes. "Oh, you kiss ass." "You love it." "Mhh, debatable." "How? I gave you three kids-four if you count me knowin' Jay since 'e was a lil' bloke." Ruby sighed softly and said, "Yeah..okay. You win, Mi Amor." and she went over and rubbed his left arm gently. Simon put his pumpkin head back on and said, "Now, if ya lot are ready, lessgo get sum candy, yeah?" and just then Jason waddled in and shouted, "Sugar!" with his hands up. He was in a matching air force costume with his older brother.

James ran over to him and said, "Hats on backwards, dude. Lemme help you, ha ha!" and he grabbed his brother's hat and put it on the right way. Jason laughed and said, "Mate, your fifteen. You should not be this excited over Halloween." James quirked a brow up. "Oh, no? Well too bad, little man. Unlike some of us I want to enjoy my youth." "Oh SHUT IT! Just because i wore ONE pair of air forces!" Daisy shouted, storming out of the room. James laughed and said, "That, Lad, is how you take the piss." Jason laughed too-before Ruby hit them both round the head. "GO! say your sorry, Ninos!"

James ran downstairs shouting out the words, "I'm sorry, Day! Please come out and gimme a hug so ma don't kill me!" Daisy shouted back, "DONT BRING MUM OVER HERE-" James found his sister eating the cupcakes that were meant for her and Sapphire's birthday party. "...If you let me have some of the frosting i won't say anything at all." "Oh, piss off!" "MMMHHH-" "Okay! Okay! Here!" Daisy shoved a cupcake towards him and he took it. "Thanks, sis." "Whatever, James." "Ey-no. That's a big no-no. I'm not James to you, Kid. I'm 'Jamie'." Daisy groaned. "Why are you like this?" "Cuase. I can be. Hey, don't get so worked up, yeah?" "...You sound like Tio Rudy." "Muy bueno. I admire Tio Rudy y Alejandro." "...Yo tambien." "So you do know Spanish?"

Daisy and James froze. Uh oh..."Heyyy, Mum! What brings you here, aye?" "Daisy. Kate. Riley." James paled along with his sister. "It was me, Mom. I told her she could have a few before we left." Ruby looked her son over and said, "Your a bad liar, Son. Never make it in the force like that." James sighed and said, "I don't wanna go into the Air Force, Ma! I wanna go into the SEALs." Ruby shook her head. "Diffrant names, same concept...You kow, I dont-" "Ma. Not now. You were about to give James the beating of his life."

Ruby turned around and saw Sapphire there, holding her dad's hand. He shrugged. "I dunno wot's goin' on but I wanna see," Simon said. Ruby slowly turned around and then she laughed. "Simon, baby...why the fuck-" Simon shut her up by throwing a bag full of fake cobwebs at her. "RUN KIDS-"

and cue the kids running out the back door and into the backyard. "QUICK-THE WOODS!" Jason shouted, running up and tree. James copied and helped the girls up into the thick oak tree's branches. Ruby ran out after her husband and he threw off his pumpkin head but tripped over his untied shoelace. "Fu-" "Gotcha!" Ruby shouted, trapping her husband under him. He took off her pumpkin head and kissed her. "Sorry?" Ruby gave him a once over and then broke out a smile. "...Fine. Your lucky I love you, Amor." "Very lucky otherwise I'd be six feet unda right about now, aye?" "Yeah."

and James gagged. "BLEUGH! Gross, you two! Hey-UNCLE ALEJANDRO!" James shouted, jumping down from his branch. He landed on his butt but recovered quickly and ran over to his uncle. Alejandro was dressed up as Dracula and his husband, Rudy was Frankenstein. "Hols, Tio!" "Eyy, Mi hombre! Que paso?" "Ehh, same old, same old." Ruby walked over and smiled. "Hola, Tio. Thanks for making it down for the girls' birthdays." "Ahh, no problem, Mi Corazon! I love my girls, just as much as they boys, don't worry, Jaunito." James groaned. "Tiooo, it's James, not Juanito!" "Your middle name is Juan, no?" "...damn it, Ma!" "Ale, Mi amor, dont provoke him."

So he talks. "Hello, Rudy," James said, not even looking at him. Rudy sighed. "I tell him one war story and he's salty three years later," Rudy mumbled. James turned and looked at Rudy dead in the eyes. "You betrayed Mi Mama...you think I'm going to forgive that, Pen-" "James Juan Alejandro Riley!" And James shut up. But he still glared at Rudy and Rudy looked at Ruby and asked, "You did for give me, right?" Ruby smiled and said, "Yes I did. There, you heard it James, and that was when I was known as Delta twelve. Long before I was Jewel."

James said, "But Ma, dad says-" "And your father wasn't even thought of, nor heard of, at this time James, so it doesn't matter. Besides! It taught my ass a lesson." James huffed and said, "Fine." Simon walked over and loomed over his son. James felt a shiver go down his spine and his heart picked up pace. "I-I uhm, I mean, yeah okay! It's forgiven!" Rudy looked at Simon and asked, "...Que paso con su esposo, Rubia?" Ruby's eye twitched. "Just because he's called Ghost don't mean you get to-" "Ey. answer me." "...Nada."

````````````````````````````````

"Trick or treat!" Jason held up his candy bag and Anna filled it, "Your brother's s'cute, Jay!" Anna said as she gave James a small kiss on the cheek-which he wiped off. "An!" James groaned through his teeth. She laughed and said, "Sorry. I'm French! It's custom!" James sighed and said, "It's fine just-my uncles are right there!" "Aww, Okay! Here, take an extra twix." James starred as she put in a party sized twix bar into his candy bag. "...How many kids?" Anna blinked, "Huh?" James grabbed her shoulders and grinned. "I swear im gonna marry you so long as you provide me with chocolate. So how many babies?" Anna blushed and said, "James!" He laughed and kissed her cheek.

"See ya 'round, Love!" Anna huffed, "this is why England and France went to war..." James just waved her goodbye and sped off to the next house. Jason's feet were getting tired and he was wondering where his mom and dad had gone off to. "Jay. Where's mum and pa?" James shrugged as they walked. "I think in the house, why?" "Cos..." "You miss 'em? Wanna find the girls and Rudy and go back?" "Yeah-I'm tired." James nodded. "Oye, Tio Ale! We're done here, bags are full and everything." Alejandro nodded. "To the jeep!"

Jason must've lied when he said he was tired because that boy took off towards the car. "Wha-Hey! You said you were tired, the hell, kid!?" James shouted as he ran after him, his long legs catching up to his brother easily. Jason giggled and touched the car first. "I win!" "No fair, you didn't call the race, boy!" "You didn't call it last time, so-" and Jason stuck out his tongue. James rolled his eyes. "Fine. You get front seat." Alejandro shook his head. "You kids are somthin' else...kinda like your mom and her siblings."

"...Mom has siblings?" Alejandro gulped. "Used to...one sister. and one step brother." "What happened?" "brother died and sister moved away and cut off coms-err connections with us." James sighed. "I miss auntie Reina." "I miss her too." and the Jeep started. They all drove in silence until they reached the house. The girls were on the porch, eating and talking with their friends. They waved to the boys walking up to them. "Party's starting now that your here, guys!"

Alejandro nodded and walked inside to allow the kids to talk. However, James didn't want to talk. After hearing about his aunt again, he felt...odd. Ah, it was his sisters birthdays! This was a worry for another day. He forced a smile onto his face and said, "Race you lot into the house!" and started running. His little sisters caught up fairly quickly, "Where to?" Daisy panted out, just like her father would've. "Kitchen counter-" and off she sped.

Daisy slapped the counted and then stood straight up. "Dang-I'm fast!" she shouted, throwing her arms up happily.

Ruby took a look at her kids and sighed softly, wearing her pumpkin head. "...I dont know what im going to do with you kids." Simon laughed silently and whispered, "Love them until we die?" Ruby shook her head, "Love them even after we die."

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

k, m, n, t for pd and/or suck!!! >:33333

K - What character has your favorite development arc/the best development arc?

-> you know i gotta say wiwi. i have to. that character was Made For Me i swear to GOD . genuinely i cannot think about prime defenders season 2 episode 39 without feeling physically sick bc i love it so much. its the only one i havent relistened to since i heard it the first time. i KNOW its gonna make me cry again so i genuienly have not touched it even though theres things in there i need to hear again for character research. his arc is so like. narratively satisfying in a way that hits me so fucking deep to my core in an extremely personal way. and like. there were definitely some Decisions that i was REALLY ANNOYING about hating when they were brought up because im used to media with bad storytelling/creators that do not care about their characters but. looking back on it i would not change a single thing about it. i love you wiwi so much.

-> FOR SUCK.... its not over yet. so i cannot definitively say. campaign finale comes out tomorrow so my answer may change depending on that but for right now i think i gotta say arthur. i joke a lot about hating arthur for no real reason in particular but. man his story is just REALLY good. not going 2 give you suck spoilers (hehe) but i also really like how shilo has grown through the campaign. hes my little guy :]

M - Name a character that you’d like to have for a friend.

-> TIDE. TIDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TIDE TIDE TIDE I LOVE TIDE SO MUCH. thats my dad thats my best friend i love tide so much dude. every time he is mentioned or on screen i am just like :D HI TIDE I LOVE YOU TIDE

-> grefgore :] light of my life this is how i feel anytime i think about grefgore

N - Name three things you wish you saw more or in your main fandom (or a fandom of choice).

-> CHARACTER STUDIES. PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. I LIKE A GOOD SHIPPING FIC AS MUCH AS THE NEXT GUY BUT PLEASE GOD WRITE THEM IN CHARACTER. EXPLORE THEIR THOUGHTS AND EMOTIONS AND WHY THEY MAKE CERTAIN DECISIONS THE WAY THEY DO. this doesnt even go for just pd and suck this is like. true for every single fandom ive ever fucking been in. do you know how hard it is to find character studies in the danny phantom tag on ao3. nobody has even fucking watched the show how are they going to write character studies they just want (<< i cannot legally finish this sentence without getting in so much trouble) I HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING MY FUCKING SELF AROUND HERE. ALL I EVER WRITE ARE CHARACTER STUDIES BC THATS THE WAY I THINK ABOUT CHARACTERS. I LOVE THEIR MOTIVATIONS I LOVE TO GET INSIDE THEIR BRAINS LIKE A LITTLE PARASITE AND IT IS ALWAYS SURPRISING TO ME WHEN OTHER PEOPLE DO NOT THINK LIKE THIS. (edit im just now reading through this and realized the question says three things. i did not process that. my three things are all more character studies please)

T - Do you have any hard and fast headcanons that you will die defending? 

-> oh dude i have so many hmmmmmmm how to choose just one. i have a LOT of feelings about wiwis original death and i might write something about that when i can get over my shrimp emotions about him. dakota cole audhd truther but that ones pretty much canon anyway so i dont think it counts. vyncent and his relationship with growing up in fantasy world and then being thrown into prime and how he adjusted to that. I think he really lies shitty syfy channel type horror movies that are so stupidly bad. and also plays a lot of video games but again i think thats mostly canon already. i think tide listens to dad rock but also like. ocean man by ween. you already know about my william and ashe being each others emotional support at concerts. i think william and ashe should hang out and do emo kid things more. i also have a lot of feelings about ashe and coping with the crippling loneliness of basically growing up alone and how the pd becoming like INSTANT best friends was so much for him in sooo many ways. you already know how i feel about mark i am in the middle of dissecting him like im in a high school biology class as we speak. uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh i know im gonna think of something really good after i hit the post button so stay tuned

[hostilemuppet]

So the first piece of art of yours that I saw was the comic where two of Bruce’s kids came out has trans to him and Branch tells him he’s a good dad and Bruce said he wishes their parents were supportive of him.

After that I came upon the one where JD decides to pierce his ear. And ends up with a date with a trucker.

And after that it was your first Floyd/Creek comics where Creek thinks he’s tricking Floyd but Floyd his aware and using him to get expensive stuff!!! It was between those three that I started following you.

While your style has changed since those little comics, I’ve always found your art amazing!!! And funny!!!

I keep coming back for more art and comics. I don’t read most of the asks you get so what ever happens on chapter 14 will probably be a complete surprise for me.

I do have a few questions from those first comics, have you ever considered drawing Bruce before he came out has trans? Maybe a little comic flashback of him coming out to his family? Also why was Branch so surprised? Didn’t he know Bruce was trans? And or was he… wait is Branch a he or a she? I forgot to ask before I didn’t understand in the story, if Branch came out has a boy or a girl. What I was going to say was Branch surprised that he wasn’t the only trans in the family?

As for the JD comic, have you ever considered drawing that date JD had with the trucker troll?

Also I think I once saw a Spotify playlist for Fleek with a cover of Floyd eating sushi from Creek’s back? Did I imagine that? Cause I can’t find that art on either of your twitter accounts.

Speaking of Creek’s back, what does he’s tramp stamp look like?

first of all tysm! thats very kind of you 😊 ill go through em point by point:

1- the comic where branch finds out bruce is trans wasnt related to the tdau at all, it was based on actual canon, so that version of branch wasnt intended to be a trans he/him butch he was just a cis dude. branch didnt know bruce was trans bc he wasnt even a year old at the point of the breakup and bruce had been living solely as a man for years, maybe as young as 13? (he wouldve just decided "can you call me a he? and grandma can you start buying me boy clothes at pop troll walmart?" i dont think he wouldve had the resources available to know what transgender even meant at that point) and never ended up telling branch before the breakup bc... well hes like 6 months old. and he doesnt need to know anything about "spruce"s body. and over the years bruce just kinda forgot that branch didnt know, which is why he mentioned it so casually

2- i did actually draw the troll jd had a date with! his name is clyde (although i think calling him clyde S.D. ale would be cute. like clydesdale, and also ale like the alcohol). this art is old atp so maybe ill give him a fresher coat of paint, just like im planning for jds manic pixie dream rock troll girlfriends who hate him

3- i. yes. yes i did draw floyd eating sushi off creeks back and ass before 😭 based off a very good screenshot from captain laserhawk with rayman eating sushi off a cow woman. i drew it twice in fact, with the second being a redraw. here are both of them

i considered redrawing it a third time bc i massively overhauled how i drew trolls but i think if i keep doing it itll stop being funny

4- creeks (NON CANON) tramp stamp, i think would be ocean themed with seashells and waves. maybe ill design creeks tramp stamp today, but again its NOT CANON its not actually a thing in the tdau. unless alex wants it to be

[henriiiii-1001old]

tmc fairy tale au!!!

SO this is actually a concept i had a few months ago that i never rly expanded upon.

first, let me explain the basics:

i assigned different tmc characters to different fairy tales, but they all exist in the same universe.

Adam - Rapunzel Evelin - Snow White/Flynn Rider Jonah - Little Mermaid Sarah - Gretel/Daughter from The Juniper Tree Mark - Hansel/Stepson from The Juniper Tree Cesar - Frog Prince Thatcher - Lumberjack guy from Red Riding Hood Ruth - Red Riding Hood Dave - Father from The Juniper Tree Six - Gothel Gabriel - Stepmother from The Juniper Tree Preacher - The Sea Witch Stanley - The Candy Witch Alt!Thatch - Big Bad Wolf

next, some art i made for the au!!!

and now, huge lore dump! >:)c its gonna be long so buckle your seatbelts LMAO

so, the main plot of this au is basically that adam has been stuck in a tower in the middle of nowhere for almost 21 years. he had been raised by six, who is actually a witch set on taking over the kingdoms that surround the nearby areas (aka the counties). one day, six it out doing stuff, and while he's gone prince evelin (yes she's a prince bc fuck it) ends up finding the tower. she decides to climb it out of curiosity.

she ends up in a standoff against adam, but to try to deescalate things, they introduce themselves to each other. all of a sudden before they could talk more, adam hears six coming back and hides evelin in a nearby closet. evelin sees adam and six get into a fight abt adam wanting to go out into the world for once, but six is all "you're not ready" and it just gets really bad. all until six lovebombs adam and leaves again to get something for adam's upcoming 21st birthday.

evelin had exited the closet as six left, and she's like "you let him do that to you?" adam is like "uh yeah? he always does? i dont see them problem" and evie starts making adam question everything. she promises to take adam into the world but return him by night in case six came back. they'd also stay near the tower just in case as well.

cut to jonah's pov! he's a simple merman wanting to be a part of the human world! he sees evie and adam having a lot of fun and wishes he could join them. his dad (yes, if jonah is the little mermaid, the fucking mervin marshall is the king by proxy DCFVGBHNJ) is all like "nuh uh too dangerous, especially with most of the witches residing on land anyway" and jonah is like "FUCKING BET!"

he goes to the sea witch, preacher, and asks for legs and talks about seeing adam and evie hanging out! and preacher is like "im sorry WHO????" bc she knows that adam shouldnt be out and about. she makes jonah promise that as part of the deal, he must return adam to six in three days time, otherwise he'll turn back into a merman. he quickly agrees, and the whole deal is made. preacher does go tell six about this, and while he freaks out at first, preacher is like "it's ok dude i got this. i got a client to promise to return him home as part of our deal. you're fine m'dude."

jonah ends up on land and tries teaching himself how to talk while finding a cloth to barely dress himself with. adam and evie do eventually see him and they're like "yo who tf are you?" and while jonah cant talk, they do find a way to write to each other and they become friends!!!!

they do also eventually meet sarah at some point, and oh b o y does she have a backstory.

SO, in order to explain her backstory, let me explain the story of "the juniper tree" (copy pasted from discord LMAO)

"so a mother is peeling apples under a juniper tree and accidentally cuts her finger. the blood drips onto the snow on the ground, and that (somehow) grants the woman's wish to have a child as white as snow and as red as blood. she dies after giving birth to her perfect child, and the father soon remarries, having a daughter of her own.

she loved her daughter but hated her stepson and abused him every day and is all "i want my daughter to inherit your father's money." she then leads her children to a chest of apples one day. she lets her daughter pick an apple from the chest, but when her stepson came to pick one, she slammed the chest on his head and decapitated him.

she then set it up to where the same thing would happen again but the daughter would be there to witness it all, and her mother would gaslight her into thinking that she murdered her own brother. she then literally turned her stepson into soup and fed him to her husband. the daughter was so grossed out and distraught the entire time, but she couldn't rat her mother out. she ended up burying her brother's bones under the juniper tree.

then, he reincarnated as a bird and sung a song to some townspeople to convince them to help him get revenge on his stepmother. he gathered a golden chain for his father, red shoes for his sister, and a millstone to crush his stepmother. he reveals himself to his family and they live happily ever after."

here's the changes i made to the original story:

instead of just the mother dying, both of mark and sarah's prents die, and now they are in the sole custody of dave

instead of having the caretaker marry someone, dave asks his friend "o'brien" to help raise mark and sarah

instead of the stepmother dying, it is revealed that o'brien was actually the great mage gabriel trying to steal something important to their plans that dave just so happens to have

and thats it CFVGBHNJM. gabriel does try and come back every once in a while to coax gabe into either letting them come back or trying to make dave give himself up for sarah's sake.

cesar's story is also p cool imo! he is the prince of bythorne and evelin's cousin! they got along great when evelin was younger, but that stopped once cesar disappeared.

this was caused by him saving mark and sarah from the candy witch, stanley, who had lured them in to specifically kill mark. cesar saw what was going on and saved the two of them before it was too late.

later that night, stanley decided to be a petty bitch and curse cesar into being a frog so he wouldn't be able to save anyone else from her or her sisters' (in which six is her like. brother but i'll explain why later LMAO) plans. cesar hid in the shadows of mandela kingdom's palace for years since then.

since cesar's disappearance, evelin had wanted to take the role of prince to honor him. she also used it as a way to not have to be trapped inside the palace walls and coddled. she ended up still feeling stuck anyway, which led to her sneaking out to travel through the woods, which ofc led her one day to find adam's tower.

at some point (if anything this would be after evie and adam meet and stuff), evelin finds cesar in his frog form on the windowsill of the guest room he would regularly stay in whenever he would come to mandela to visit. he finds that she isnt revolted by his new appearance and is actually willing to help him out!

he explains that he learned that most curses can be cured by "true love's kiss", which in storybooks was always seen as romantic. he had always viewed evelin like a little sister, so he felt that he was hopeless.

that was until evelin thought of a loophole, since the stories never explicitly said that it was romantic, she would try to break the curse purely through the love she has for him as her cousin. she kisses the top of cesar's head, and cesar has returned to his human form!!!

...well, somewhat. the curse had altered his human form due to it not being broken for years on end, so cesar came back deformed. his limbs were too long and half of his face was always covered by a dark shadow. cesar did freak out about this, but evelin assured him that he'll always be her cesar, no matter what he looked like.

evelin and cesar explained the situation and cesar was finally returned to bythorne. he did write a letter a bit after wards telling her that he has resigned from his princely duties to become a princess! maybe it would help him not have to struggle with the expectations of needing to be brave and bold, and it would be a thank you to evelin for taking his role as a prince!!!

speaking of evelin, let's go back to her for a minute. so, i had also put her as snow white, but we haven't really seen her fulfill that role yet. weeelllll...

at some point in the story, six finds evelin alone in the forest and offers her to take a bite of an apple in exchange for knowledge about adam and his past. the thing is, evelin HATES fruit so she's like "ewww do i have tooo" and six is like "if you really wanna know, then you gotta."

evelin agrees and bites into the apple. it tastes so fucking gross, but she feels like she was to swallow it to finish her end of the deal. once she swallows, the pieces suddenly cling onto her throat, choking her in the process. as she struggles to breathe, six begins to tell her who adam truly is.

adam is a regular boy who six took as part of a deal made by his parents. lynn had been getting pregnancy cravings and wanting the rapunzel frm the neighbor's garden. she made jude retrieve them for her, but it wasn't enough. eventually, jude got caught by six and agreed to give up their firstborn child in exchange to continue taking the flowers.

once adam was born, lynn and jude were killed by six, and he took adam away to raise him as his prodigy. as a catalyst for the witches' plans.

as six is explaining all of this to evelin, she is trying her hardest to take him down with her. fuck the info he's giving her, he tricked her, and now he has to pay. she swings with all her might but falls in vain. her vision goes black as six walks away from her dying body...

there's probably a "mother knows best reprise" moment here and six is all like "oh you might wanna go save your friend if you care about her so much" and adam freaks tf out. she's desperately trying to think of something to help evelin.

eventually, the group remember's cesar's story with "true love's kiss" and they're like "fuck it let's try that". adam, while literally sobbing, plants a small kiss on her forehead and prays for her to wake up.

while this is all happening, evelin ets visited by mark's spirit. he basically hypes her up and is like "you got this girlie!!!" and she wakes up after adam plants his kiss on her. she starts to choke again, but adam helps her with it and heimlichs the apple out of her throat. she's finally able to breathe, and the group celebrates.

however, the happy moment doesn't last for too long. jonah does eventually return adam to six behind evelin and sarah's backs, but afterward he feels so guilty for it. they literally sacrificed one of the first human friends he's ever made for legs. how stupid is that? they eventually go to sarah and evelin and they quickly figured out what happened. while evelin goes to the tower to save adam (with help from a certain spirit), sarah and jonah confront preacher.

there is gonna be a plot abt preacher almost taking over the seas, but jonah and sarah do eventually take her down and retrieve jonah's voice. and yes, sarah gets to see that jonah is a merman and she's actually like "YO WAIT YOU GUYS ARE REAL???" and jonah is like "UH YEAH?????"

and yes, adam does eventually escape as well, but i dont have those details either so ye :')

that's the main plot at least! i do have a subplot for thatcher's pov tho! more copy paste from discord

"thatcher and ruth are friends and live nearby each other. ruth usually helps out w raising mark and sarah, though mark by this point is dead so dave DEFINITELY needs help. he and sarah havent been taking his death well, especially since dave literally ate mark’s remains without knowing. and sarah feels guilty enough for being gaslit into believing that she killed mark.

so ruth is about to go to dave’s place and has to walk through the forest to get there. she eventually meets what seems to be a very friendly wolf. she is a little weirded out by it, but she eventually tells it how dave lost mark and that she’s helping out! and the wolf is like “oh thats cool! i wish you luck on your journey. though i must say, these flowers smell beautiful! maybe you should pick some and take them to your dear friend!” and as ruth collects flowers as the wolf suggested, it found thatcher nearby and took his appearance to take a visit to a particular dave lee." ...

"she gets to dave's place who has been escorted out by the wolf/alt thatcher, right? so he's like "dear friend, why don't you rest! you've spent all day walking here, and you should be able to rest" aaaaand he tries to turn her into a werewolf but then thatcher comes in and is like "AYO TF YOU DOING TO MY BESTIE????" and he and the wolf fight. thatcher ends up getting bitten but is able to ward him off with his axe that was laced with silver just in case. so ruth is saved, but overtime thatcher feels more pain surge throughout his body and just kinda. turns one night.

unfortunately, he ends up killing ruth. alt thatcher tries to take this as an opportunity to maybe make him join the witches, but thatcher ofc refuses and makes a break towards dave's house. thatcher ends up telling dave what happened, and dave is okay with helping him hide it as well as hiding his newfound lycanthropy

sarah overhears this convo and becomes EXTREMELY angry at thatcher bc ruth was helping dave raise her after mark died. she was basically the mother figure sarah had always wanted, and thatcher took that away from her."

that's it for plot!!! now for some witch shenanigans >:)

so the witches are basically all the alts who usually practice shapeshifting magic to like. deceive others and all that jazz. ive made it a running joke that six is technically the only guy there FVGBHNJ

like, stanley is fem, preacher is female, alt!thatcher is copying thatcher who is transfem in this au, and gabriel dresses fem. six (and by proxy adam) is literally the only guy there DCFVGBHNJ

i am. running out of energy but i think that's everything for rn. hope you enjoy this au though!!!! ive put a lot into it <33333