#bbc saw the opportunity and took it

[alittlefruitcake]

[bbsmuts]

Field Trip Part 2: The Queen's Homecumming ft. BLACKPINK Jennie and Lisa

A/N: This is the continuation of Field Trip, which was something that was requested a lot back when I released the original. I've kept people waiting long enough, and I'm sure seeing that title made a lot of people excited. Field Trip remains my most popular smut, with over 900 notes, shoutout to my man @xiaoondc for pitching it. It's almost been a year in real time, so it'll be accurate.

-상훈

Length: 8.45k

Possible TW: Pretty much all of it

Tags: Domination, slave/master, choking, spanking, breeding, humiliation, whipping, gangbang, spitroasting, anal, throatfuck, bondage

WARNING: Intense and graphic sexual violence and degradation is depicted in this smut, much more than the original Field Trip. If you are easily triggered by or sensitive to such content, I strongly advise that you stop reading here.

Part 1: Field Trip

It had been nearly a year since Jennie's scandalous visit to Nairobi, and the time had come for her to return. At last.

Jennie had been waiting eagerly for a full year to go back to Kenya as she had promised, and now she had the opportunity. So it was with high spirits and high anticipation that she packed her things and headed to the airport. Only this time, there was a difference. She had decided to bring along a friend of hers who was relatively pure and innocent, Lisa. The two of them boarded the plane together, Lisa happily talking Jennie's ear off, having no idea what was in store for her. She was jittery the whole flight, anticipation and excitement flooding her. The thought of what was going to happen when she arrived...it made her want to finger herself right there with Lisa and the random-ass guy sitting in the seat next to her.

She disembarked the plane hastily with Lisa, waited very impatiently going through security, and took a cab to the familiar Radisson Blu hotel, where she settled down for a few hours of sleep before the morning.

...

The look of pure shock on Ngina's face when she saw Jennie, in her crop top and shorts, back on the bus was laughable, she stared for a moment and then recovered herself, going back to her clipboard to examine something. Jennie smirked and sat down near the front next to Lisa, watching the locals of Nairobi mill around by the bus stop. Once Ngina had counted her passengers and made sure everyone was there and that there were no stragglers, the bus engine started and they began moving. Jennie's excitement was reaching fever pitch, but she kept a calm outer demeanor. The scenery brought back vivid memories of her last visit, and as they pulled closer to the village, Jennie could see the massive Mugumo tree that had lead her and Somi into the trouble that had ultimately lead her to a Kenyan BBC addiction.

The village had run into some subtle improvements since Jennie had last been there; the houses and buildings had been renewed, the villagers clothes looked newer, and the architecture was slightly more modern and updated, and something that resembled an outmoded hotel was visible at the far end of the square. The massive baobab tree that Jennie and Somi had been tied to and whipped at last time was also clearly in sight, the thought sending a pang of anticipation through her body.

All the passengers disembarked the bus and entered the village, Ngina shaking hands with the leader, who looked mildly surprised to see Jennie back. The same could not be said for the other passersby, who stopped and openly stared in shock. Jennie approached the leader and extended her hand.

Taking her hand and shaking it, he said, "I never did catch your name, did I?"

"It's Jennie. You?"

"Jaali." He looked to Jennie's left and saw Lisa, who was standing there watching the exchange and had chosen to wear a very small and very tight white halter top and black shorts, which perfectly displayed her flawless figure. "I see you brought a spare."

"Indeed I did. This is Lisa." Lisa stepped forward and shook Jaali's hand, eyeing him and her surroundings very curiously.

Jaali stepped back, a cunning smirk on his face. "Very good. Well, have a look around, feel free to explore." His smirk widened. "I hear the Mugumo trees are very pretty this time of year."

"How funny, so did I." Jennie returned the devilish grin, both of them sharing a knowing smirk. "Be a shame if we didn't check them out."

He laughed. "Indeed. Well, I have matters to attend to, so I'd best be off. Enjoy yourselves."

Jennie and Lisa departed towards the large, open fields together. The word that Jennie was back spread very quickly, and various locals, especially the men, greeted Jennie as she passed and voiced how glad they were to see her again.

Jennie inwardly smirked and shook her head, since she knew well that everyone but Lisa knew what would be going on today. She wondered vaguely whether she and Lisa would be separated, or whether Lisa would consent to or enjoy what was bound to happen once they reached the Mugumo tree. The guard troop passed several times, each time a different member greeting Jennie and throwing a glance at her retreating form.

"Wow," commented Lisa the sixth time this happened, "you must be really popular down here. What, did you make friends with every person in Kenya?"

Jennie chuckled as they both sat down side by side on a large lakeside rock. "Sure I did. Plenty of guys, as well. You know me, you know I'm into black guys."

Lisa scoffed and laughed as well. "Of course you would."

They laughed together for a moment before Jennie spoke. "Hey, you never know what could go down."

Lisa's giggles came to a hushed silence. "You mean...with them?"

Jennie nodded, curious to see how Lisa felt about it. Lisa blinked a few times and then said, "Three letters. B. B. C!"

Jennie laughed again. "Shocking that you would think that way."

Lisa paused her giggling once more. "But seriously, did you actually?"

"Maybe. Maybe not."

"Sure then. Whatever you say."

Jennie scoffed and then glanced toward the bank opposite them, spotting the massive Mugumo tree, fully in bloom, and the altar below it. The scenery was really quite beautiful, but as the guard troop passed by again, she had other things on her mind.

"Say, Lisa," Jennie said, still observing the tree, "you ever seen a Mugumo tree up close before?"

"No."

"Well, why don't we go see that one?" Jennie nodded towards the other bank. Lisa looked over at it and hopped up.

"Sure, let's go."

A small and insignificant part of Jennie felt guilty for leading her friend into such a trap, knowing that the level of pain, shame, and humiliation would match if not exceed that of last time, but that small part of her was drowned by the other parts of her, particularly parts in her lower region, that had sworn loyalty and developed addiction to the cocks of the tribesmen.

They approached the tree, Lisa making comments on how nice the leaves looked, and sat down on another rock near it. Before long, the small body of guards started moving steadily in their direction.

"That's odd," Jennie commented, fighting hard to keep the smirk off her face and her excitement down. "I wonder why they're coming over here? There's no one but us."

"No idea." Lisa yawned. "God, I should have had some coffee, I was up all night."

Inwardly, Jennie speculated that once the guards finished their trip over here, Lisa would very quickly forget her tiredness. The guards marched their way all the way up to the rock, and their leader took another step forward.

"This is a forbidden area, you must not trespass here. Come with us now."

"Oop," said Lisa as they got off the rock and followed the guards back towards the village. "Guess we weren't supposed to be there. Well, we didn't know."

"Yup. We'll probably just go back to Ngina now." Jennie knew full well that the words coming out of her mouth were blatant lies, but she ignored it as they were led into the village. Her excitement was almost making her tremble, but she kept it in.

The guards then split them up, just like last time. Lisa's cries of "Hey, wait!" were ignored by Jennie and the tribesmen. Jennie was brought to the same hut as last time, with the clay floor and thick wood centerpost. The tribesmen shoved her inside and then took their places in a circle around the hut. She would have removed her own clothes, but she really enjoyed how rough they were with her. Two stepped forward and tore off her top, not bothering to be careful. Then one of them knelt, grabbed her shorts by the front, and ripped them in two. To her surprise, they left her bra and panties alone, perhaps at the order of Jaali, and tied her hands in front of her, leaving her kneeling half-naked on the floor.

Speak of the devil, Jaali himself walked into the hut, wearing only the loincloth that the other tribesmen wore, unlike his usual expensive manner of dress. Jennie surveyed his muscular and fit figure as he paced around the small hut, feeling heat grow between her legs, finding herself growing exceedingly horny just at the sight of him.

"So, Miss Jennie," he said, the same devious grin on his face as earlier, "you find yourself the same predicament as a year ago." He gave a theatrical sigh. "Of course, since you are now a repeat offender, your punishment for such a heinous crime will be significantly more severe than last time."

He stopped directly in front of Jennie, looking down at her and allowing her a glimpse under his loincloth, both the sight and his words spiking her arousal up. He chuckled at her expression and resumed his pacing.

"I must commend you, however, for the new addition to my harem. Lisa, her name was? Quite a beauty. And in no time she, like you, wil become a cockslave to me."

There was a short pause, in which he made a half revolution of the hut. "I notice, as well, that your friend from last time has foolishly chosen to ignore my warning and stay away. Very well. She will regret it."

"How will you bring her back?" Jennie asked.

"I will send my best men to South Korea and find her. They are skilled and they will track her down and drag her back by the hair if they have to."

Jennie considered this for a moment, then realized something.

"I mean no disrespect, sir, but wouldn't a bunch of massive, smelly, half-naked Kenyan tribesmen draw a lot of attention?"

He snorted and paused in front of her, raising his eyebrows. "Surely you are smarter than that, Miss Jennie. This may appear to be a rural, run down little village, my little slut, but believe me, we are not living in the stone age anymore. I have ample equipment to disguise my men and make them fit in."

He shouted something in Swahili to the men outside the hut, of which Jennie could piece together as him requesting a chair. A heavy scraping sound sounded outside and the door opened, allowing two guards to push in a large, fancy, luxurious throne-esque chair, which they pushed up against the pillar in the center of the hut. Jaali sat down on it, unsheathed a knife from a sheath on the underside of one of the chair's arms, and handed it to a guard behind Jennie, who slashed the straps on her bra and both sides of her thong's waistband, removing both and leaving Jennie naked, wet, and desperate. The guard handed the knife back to Jaali, who cut off the string holding his loincloth together, removing it.

Jennie could practically feel her mouth watering at the sight of his cock; even semi-hard he was packing at least 7 inches. She waited for his order.

"Now, my little slave," he said, tossing the parasol leaf loincloth aside and spreading his legs slightly more, "come here and suck my cock like you mean it. Show me how much you want it."

Jennie crawled forward, sopping like a Korean rainstorm, and took his hardening shaft in both hands, slowly pumping up and down, feeling her arousal soar. She took his head into her mouth, sucking lightly. She had planned on starting slow, and she was doing so, but Jaali had other plans.

He grabbed her hair into a rough ponytail and forced her head down, sending half his length into her mouth and throat. "No one ever taught you how to suck a dick, slave?"

She moaned lightly around his dick, closing her eyes and letting him take control. Independent of him, she pushed her own head further down, pushing more of him into her.

"That's a good girl," he groaned quietly, controlling her head and moving it up and down. "Guards! Mfunge mikono!"

She didn't need to understand him, as his instruction was followed through. She felt her hands being tied together behind her back, at the same time as Jaali pulled her head down to his base, making her gag and moan. She was absolutely in love with this life, eager to serve and eager to please. She gagged again and choked as he did not release her head, thrusting his hips up into her face and driving his cock, if possible, deeper into her throat. She pushed her tongue out and licked along his balls, thoroughly enjoying being treated rough. Jaali moaned again, waited a moment, and then released her. She pulled her head off his shaft and gasped in a breath, but her moment of peace was short lived. She was turned around and shoved down, her face pressing into the cool clay floor. Jennie's heart rate increased, as she knew what was coming. A moment later she gave a gasp and a broken moan as a large cock slid into her tight, wet pussy, filling her to the brim. She had never felt so stuffed before in her life, and the sensation of the tip of a cock against her cervix when he bottomed out made her moan louder.

"Fuck!" She cried. "You're so big...master..."

She could hear the smirk in his voice. "Seems she knows her place better than I thought."

No further words were exchanged as he started thrusting his hips, slow at first, but quickly getting much faster, and in a matter of seconds Jennie was shrieking in pleasure and her legs were trembling with the effort of supporting her pleasure-riddled body. The continued assault on her pussy drove her crazy.

"Oh, fuck! Yes, yes, oh my god, please keep going! Fuck, you're so big! Keep pounding me!"

He pushed on her head and grabbed her breast, squeezing tightly. Jennie felt herself rapidly careening into the first orgasm of many that day.

"You like that, huh? You fucking slut, all nice and wet for me."

"Yes, I love it..." Jennie whimpered softly, brow furrowing at his deep strokes. "I-I'm a slut for you, master..."

"Good girl." He kicked up his speed and fucked her faster, automatically increasing force. Jennie's "Ah!"s became exponentially louder and within seconds, she gave a wail of bliss and squirted hard on his cock, her cheeks growing hotter as well.

"Fuck, Jennie, I can see why you're a crowd favorite!" He groaned. "God, you're tight!"

He pulled out and yanked her upright, slapping her face with his dick. Immediate lay understanding, she dove forward and shoved him all the way down her throat, desperate to taste his cum in her mouth. She bobbed her head up and down very quickly, sounds of deepthroat reverberating in the timbers of the hut.

"I'm gonna cum in your mouth, slave. Are you ready?"

Jennie let out a muffled "Yes, master!" around his cock before slamming her head down again, driving every last millimeter of his length down her throat. She gagged hard and coughed muffledly, but kept herself there, throat squeezing him. He gave one final loud groan, grabbed her roughly by the hair, and pulled her into his crotch, before exploding in her throat, straight down into her stomach. She slid off him slowly, savoring the taste of his thick cum, while he sat panting on the chair. She over balanced and fell on her side, still breathing heavily.

Jaali stood up and then squatted down in front of her, turning her languid hesd towards him. "I expect a performance of that standard every single time I use you, is that clear?"

"Yes, master," said Jennie, practically seeing hearts, as she looked at him.

"I must now go and sort out your friend, who will submit to me soon enough. I will leave you to my men." He walked to the door, and as the tribesmen approached, he threw a smirk oved his shoulder. "Have fun."

Jennie wished she could see Lisa get dominated, but she had no time to think about that as the men approached. Loincloths were removed, and suddenly she was surrounded by 5 large dicks, all stiff and ready to pound her.

She was grabbed and raised to a kneeling position, in which the man with the biggest cock slid under her, and pushed into her still-wet pussy, making her gasp loudly and moan in both pleasure and slight pain. He was incredibly big inside her, stretching her out considerably. Another moved in front of her and she opened her mouth obediently, allowing him in. The shaft that entered her ass, thus completing the trio, brought back strong déja vu from a year back, and she moaned louder as all three started pumping fast and hard. This feeling of being completely full, it was what she had missed so bad, and now it caused her more pleasure than ever before.

"Fuck!" Jennie moaned around the cock in her mouth as the man fucking her ass reached around her and choked her, none too carefully or lightly. She gagged as the cock was thrust deeper into her throat, her eyes rolling as she stuck out her tongue and allowed t deeper still, until he bottomed out.

All three of them groaned, and one of the other two cut the ropes binding her hands, allowing her to stroke him and his counterpart. The six of them moaned and grunted in various languages, tumbling down towards the inevitable orgasm that awaited all of them. Jennie could understand a couple of them degrading her in Swahili, which only served to turn her on more, and she felt the familiar buildup going sky high as their thrusts increased in strength and speed.

Then the hand on her throat tightened considerably as the first orgasm of the group erupted in her ass; she moaned at the spurts of warmth flooding her suddenly, and the pulsing in her tight hole. Her continued deepthroat sounds were turning her on, making her wetter, and the man fucking her pussy got an ample dousing of organic lube. His thrusts became less inhibited, faster, more slick, and he finally buried himself deep inside her, and the first shot of cum deep inside her womb made her throw her head back, eyes wide and mouth open in a gasp, the sheer depth of it having her stunned and pleasured. The man in front of her grabbed her hair impatiently and shoved his cock back into her throat, and she gagged again, eyes rolling back as he bottomed out, groaning loudly.

Jennie closed her eyes and let the pleasure and arousal take over, allowing her submission to control her. She bobbed her head back and forth on the tribesman in front of her, driving him in and out of her throat, pushing him closer to his climax. Suddenly, the two others she had been stroking moved behind her, and she gasped, choked on the sudden inhale of saliva, and whipped her head around as the sensation of two cocks pressing against her asshole invaded her. She had never been double penetrated in one hole before, and she had the feeling it might not be as pleasurable as single anal penetration. With a fair amount of spit, they managed to push into her tight hole, causing her a great deal of pain and pleasure. She moaned out of both, but dutifully turned back to the other, jamming his cock back into her mouth. Both men behind her began furiously thrusting into her, seemingly enjoying her cries of both pleasure and pain. The guy in front then assumed a new position; one that benefitted all three remaining gangbangers. He lay down on his back, sliding his thick legs under her, so his cock was pointing straight up. She quickly brought her upper half down, so her ass was in the air, opening up her hole better, and brought her head down on the shaft hard, plunging it down her throat in one smooth motion. She furrowed her eyebrows in the effort of keeping it there; the new position allowed for better leverage and more penetration in her throat, it wasn't easy.

As her throat contracted around him and she massaged the underside with her tongue, he gave an almighty groan and grabbed her by the head, pulling her down still further as he blew his load in her throat, straight into her stomach, and her eyes rolled back once again as she struggled not to choke and spit his cum out. She pulled off him, swallowed with difficulty, then looked him in the eye, biting her lip in arousal.

Her seductive look was interrupted by a moan and her eyebrows arching upward as one of the two behind her started roughly fingering her clit, making her arch her back and buck her hips against them, crying out wildly at the sudden burst of pleasure. The other pushed her head into the ground, allowing him to see her side-profile moan. He leaned forward, putting more weight on her grounded face, railing her into the floor. Her entire body quaked under the force of the impacts, the strokes, rocking her prostrate form. Each and every blow to her ass made her tremble. She felt her limp hands being tied together again, something she didn't object to in the least. It made her feel controlled, helpless. And she loved it.

The man in front of her, now sitting comfortably on a wide pillow, grabbed her hair and yanked her face up, allowing him to see her pleasure-addled face. Her eyebrows were curved upwards, eyes closed, and she bit her lip at his roughness. She opened her unfocused eyes slightly and looked at him, letting out a small "ah" at a particularly hard thrust from behind her.

"You're a good obedient whore, hm?" He spoke in a thick accent, but not indecipherable. She didn't answer immediately, trying to think clearly past her haze of bliss. He slapped her roughly, making her yelp and give a quiet moan.

"Yes...master..." Jennie moaned out, giving a louder cry as three additional fingers were shoved into her pussy, adoring the roughness and the degradation. "I'm a...fuck...g-good little slut for you...master..."

He chuckled and let go of her hair, allowing her face to fall back into the floor. "Yes you are. Good girl."

Jennie moaned again. How could she ever go back to Korea? How in her right mind would she ever give this feeling up? As one of them behind her slapped her ass viciously, making her yelp louder, and she threw an arched-eyebrows lip bite over her shoulder, which earned her another slap on the ass. She moaned a vague plea for more, and the two kept up the spanks.

"Fuck..." She said softly, a small squeal escaping her lips at an especially hard spank. "I'm gonna cum..."

Her head was pulled up and she looked with hazy eyes into those of the man now relaxing on the pillow, who smirked. "You're going to what?"

"C-cum, master..." Jennie repeated, her voice trembling slightly, the pleasure reaching fever pitch inside her. "It's so good...so f-fucking good..."

He moved closer and pressed his cock against her lips, to which she gave a long lick, and then took it into her mouth, slowly moving back and forth. She moaned around his thickness, and with stifled groans, both men fucking her ass orgasmed simultaneously, sending another tirade of hot cum deep into her bowels. Her moans increased in volume dramatically, and she pulled off the cock in her mouth to vocalize her pleasure.

With a scream, she squirted intensely all over the thighs of the two behind her, yelling her lungs out as her world disappeared in a whirlpool of bliss. She was no longer aware of anything; all she knew was the pleasure of being the cockslave of this tribe. She panted heavily, slumping to the floor as all three men backed off. Faintly, she heard a very similar scream rent the air, and she immediately knew it was Lisa succumbing to the pleasure as well.

A sheen of sweat covered her entire body. She could feel cum starting to leak out of her ass and pussy, and as she returned to full consciousness, she heard footsteps approaching. Jaali entered the tent, a large and satisfied smile on his face, and she turned onto her back to see him.

"Did it work...master?" Jennie said breathlessly, chest heaving. She pulled herself upright as he approached.

"Very well, I'd say." He smiled wider. "She hasn't fully complied yet, and she's still acting a bit defiant, but that'll be fixed very soon. My men have done a good job so far. Soon enough she, too, will realize that she has no choice. The pleasure will get to her."

Jennie knew quite well what was coming next, and she was both excited and scared. It was quite painful last time, though she had enjoyed it in a way. But this time, he had said it would be more severe. She shivered, even though it was at least 40 degrees outside.

"So now," Jaali continued, "I believe you are aware of our next step?"

Jennie nodded, a small smirk tugging at her lips despite her fear of the possible intensity this time. The guards moved forward and grabbed her by the upper arms, pulling her upright. They marched her outside, where a crows had assimilated and she could see Lisa's slim naked form waiting by the huge baobab tree in the village square. Among the many emotions Jennie could see in Lisa's eyes, betrayal and hurt were not detectable. What was detectable was pleasure, adoration, slight confusion, and excitement. Despite having experienced this exact situation before, her modesty had been somewhat recovered during her year in back Seoul, and she felt her cheeks grow hot as her naked body was exposed to the crowd. However, she made no attempt to cover herself and allowed herself to be led up to the baobab tree. The guards lifted her onto the brick tree ring, and one climbed up after her. He tied another rope around the one binding her hands, fashioned the other end into a noose and threw it up over the branch of the tree, tightening it so she couldn't move her arms. Lisa's arms were also tied above her head, and as the guard retreated, she turned her head to look at Jennie.

The guard started professing their crime to the crowd gathered, and Lisa said three words to her.

"Did you know?"

Jennie was silent for a moment, considering whether or not she should tell the truth. Finally she looked at her and spoke.

"Yes, I did."

Lisa snorted. "So you led me into this on purpose?"

Jennie thought she was angry, but she then smiled. "Can't say I expected something like this to happen, but I like it."

"Wait - you're okay with this?"

Lisa smiled wider. "Didn't you hear me earlier? BBC! I wasn't talking about the news corporation, I knew we'd be doing that kinda stuff with them."

In spite of what she had just said, Jennie looked away. "I'm sorry."

"But why?" Lisa questioned. "We came here both knowing what would probably happen, you just knew more of it than me."

The voice of the guard and the usual angry shouts subsided from behind them, and Jennie looked over her shoulder. The box of whips and punishing tools was being brought out again, and Jennie could see a few cat-o-nine tails hanging over the edge of it. Jennie's heart skipped a beat; they had refrained from using the cat-o-nines last time, but since it would be more severe, would they this time? A cold sweat gathered at her hairline. She knew that, even though she would enjoy being punished with their other implements, she would not enjoy that.

Lisa looked around as well and her face went pale. "Wait...wait, they won't use the spiky ones on us, will they?"

Jennie breathed out a heavy exhale. "They won't use them on you. They might for me...since it's my second time doing this. I really hope not though..."

The two guards in charge of punishing them approached the box, dug around in it momentarily, and one pulled out the barbed whip. Jennie's eyes went wide and a stab of fear tore through her. But she experienced heavy relief as the other one grabbed his hand to stop him, shaking his head and irritatedly saying something in Swahili. The other protested, and the reasonable one raised his voice slightly, which allowed Jennie to hear and understand what he was saying.

"No, you sadistic idiot!" He said in impatient Swahili. "We're punishing the girls, not tearing them apart!"

The one holding the barbed whip put it back, looking sullen. The other one continued digging around, shaking his head and muttering incredulously. Jennie thought a silent blessing on him for his mercy and breathed a sigh of relief. Her heart rate jumped up drastically as they finally settled on a pair of flexible riding crops, pumping her excitement up. She was a pain slut and she knew it. They approached holding the tools, and Lisa whipped her head around to look at Jennie.

"How long do they do it?"

"Not long," Jennie replied, shifting into a comfortable position and preparing for her punishment. "Enough to hurt, though. But don't worry," she continued, smiling deviously, "you'll enjoy-"

Her sentence was interrupted by a vicious smack to her ass by the crop. She cried out loudly in the middle of her sentence and Lisa gave a small squeal at her first strike. And then the second stroke came. And the third. The fourth. The fifth. Jennie, through her haze of pain and pleasure, saw Jaali sitting on his chair by a different hut 10 yards away with his ankles crossed, a drink in his hand, observing the scene. He saw her looking at him and raised his glass mockingly, his smirk visible even from this distance.

She yelped louder at a particularly hard stroke. So far, she thought, this was not more severe than last time, in fact it was more mild. No sooner had she thought this than the crops were put away, and she caught a glimpse of the bullwhips from last time when she looked back. Lisa shot a glance over at her calm, composed demeanor.

"Well, you were right, it isn't as bad as I thought it would be. And I do kinda like it."

A loud, sharp crack cut through the air and Lisa shrieked in pain, eyes wide from the shock of such a drastic increase in intensity. A faint red streak was visible on her ass. A second later Jennie felt a stinging pain on her own ass, and she yelled out as well. Lisa got whipped again, and she gave another howl, eyes screwing up.

"Ow!" She cried, tears welling in her eyes. "It hurts!"

Jennie got her next lash, and she felt tears springing to her own eyes, purely from the pain of it. At a glance to her right, she saw Lisa's pained and tearful eyes looking back at her, her mouth opening in another cry at her next lash. They were each given 12 more lashes and then the bullwhips were put away. Behind her, Jennie heard a man's voice, shouting in Swahili.

"Turn around!"

Jennie turned to face the crowd obediently, but Lisa didn't move, not understanding the command. Jennie opened her mouth to tell Lisa what he'd said, then another crack sounded and Lisa wailed again.

"He says turn around, Lisa."

Lisa turned around hurriedly to face the crowd as well, and a pink tint appeared in her tear-streaked cheeks at the lecherous jeers of the onlookers. She crossed one thigh over her pussy a bit, in a minimal effort to decrease the humiliation, but a warning look from a guard was enough for her to put it back down. She let her leg relax, letting the crowd have an unadulterated view of her naked and abused body, hanging her head in shame. In a way Jennie felt sorry for her, but that thought was strangled by the sight of Jaali walking over from his chair. The guards stood at attention and bowed their heads respectfully, and he climbed up to where Jennie was, surveying with approval the marks left on her and Lisa's bodies. He stepped right in front of her and spoke into her ear, roughly grabbing her sore ass.

"Do you think we should bring out the kitties, little slut?"

Jennie could only assume he was referencing the tails, to which she frantically shook her head.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, master."

Jaali chuckled. "Very well."

He walked behind her, delivered a painful slap to both of their asses, and then walked back to his chair with a single shouted word.

"Kuanza!" ("Commence!")

While Jaali had been talking to Jennie, the guards had gotten out two thin wooden canes and were now preparing to strike. Jennie gulped and steeled herself as much as possible, and completely lost her composure as the first lash landed directly on her nipple.

"FUCK!" She screamed, jerking away as much as possible. It stung way worse than last time, and she had not been prepared for the level of agony it caused. Lisa spouted a similar shriek at her first hit.

And so it continued for dozens of lashes, each stroke becoming more agonizing, until they stopped, leaving the two girls panting heavily, moaning in pain and covered in red streaks. Despite the intense stinging pain she was feeling, Jennie couldn't deny that her pussy was absolutely drenched, and she found herself wanting more. Then she spotted her punisher eyeing her pussy as though about to hit it with the switch.

"Please..." Jennie said quietly, almost to herself, "No..."

Despite her arousal, she knew that being whipped there with that switch would be absolute hell. He seemed to consider it, but shook his head and put away the switch. This time around they used different tools. Perhaps since it was Lisa's first time, they went easier on her this round. Her punisher brought out a multi-tasseled leather flogger, and Jennie's retrieved an old-fashioned Russian knout, thankfully designed without wire. It was, Jennie thought, like a more intense version of Lisa's flogger.

The guards approached once more, holding their different implements of punishment. Jennie saw what was coming an instant before it did - the crowd gave a collective gasp as each of the two girls was struck violently in the pussy with their respective whips. But instead of a shriek of pain, both of them let out moans of pleasure.

"Ooooh..." Jennie moaned, as the guards drew their arms back once more. "Now you like it, huh, Lisa?"

Lisa gave a cute yelp as she was struck between her thighs again. "Mmm, yeah..."

The next upswing hit her directly in the clit, eliciting a high pitched "ahh" and upping her arousal. Lisa moaned again, a barely perceptible buck of her hips signaling her pleasure.

"Harder!" Jennie cried as she was whipped again, desperate for her release. "Fucking whip me harder!"

The guard didn't understand the words she said, but could clearly decipher her tone because his uppercuts increased in force and frequency. She felt herself drawing nearer to an orgasm from pain alone, though the strikes caused her intense pleasure from it. Lisa's cries also got louder as she too approached her orgasm.

"Fuck," Lisa gasped, chest heaving, "I'm gonna cum!"

Jennie only moaned in reply, giving a loud "ah" at her punisher's swing. But then there was a pause in the pleasure pain. Jaali had roused himself from his chair and was making his way through the crowd as Lisa's shouts continued, and after a quick word with Jennie's guard he took the knout from him and turned to face Jennie. There was a moment of silence, broken only by her counterpart's broken whimper, wherein Jaali and Jennie looked each other in the eye, and Jennie knew she was about to cum.

With a slight cock of his head, Jaali brought his hand down and then swung it up into her soaking wet pussy. Then again. And on the third strike, he calculated his movement, let his hand fall, and then brought up a stinging, painful, blissful strike into her. Every tassel of the ten-tail knout was felt, each landing an exquisite sting on a different spot. Her clit, her entrance, her lips, everything was hit in a magnificent blow. And this was what drove her over the edge.

With a final shriek, voicing her pleasure, she squirted explosively all over the place; droplets of her cum showered the tree ring and everything below her. It only took a few more strikes for Lisa to reach her orgasm as well; lithe body writhing, she squirted hard on the tree ring below her too. The two of them hung limp against their bonds, chests heaving.

Jaali climbed up to stand in front of the crowd, back to the two bound girls, and starting speaking loudly in Swahili to the audience.

"You see this?" He gestured at the two of them. "These two degenerate whores have just orgasmed before your eyes, from a public whipping! They are aroused by pain and humiliation! Now that you have seen with your own eyes the level of decadence these licentious sluts show, I leave them to you. I trust that you will handle them appropriately."

The crowd, especially the men, cheered at the last two sentences, and the mob converged. The rope on Jennie's hands was sawed off and she was dragged onto the ground with Lisa. Jennie felt a mass of hands groping and fingering her, to which she moaned quietly. She was pulled to a kneeling position, at which time someone tied a piece of cloth into her mouth, keeping her from talking. A hand grabbed her by the hair and yanked her head back, and a few more restrained her hands behind her back. She felt a lukewarm substance being daubed across her breasts and cleavage, but she couldn't decipher the words from feeling alone. The hand gripping her hair was pulling very hard, and Jennie gritted her teeth at the pain. Yet another hand grabbed her by the neck and tightened its grip until she was gasping, and several more slapped whatever parts of her were accessible. She felt blows land on her ass, pussy, breasts, face, thighs, and other spots. She managed to turn her head enough to see Lisa, who was being treated the same way, and black clay paint which had been roughly smeared across her breasts spelled "Kahaba" (Whore). An unknown someone slapped her face hard enough to knock her over, but she was steadied by the thirty hands grasping her.

Jennie's mind was a whirlwind of chaos and mixed emotions, and the only things that resonated with her brain were the pleasure of being caressed and fingered and the pain of being slapped, spanked, and abused. Bodies and noise pressed in on her. Her hair was released, and she looked down at her chest to see the same clay paint, which spelled "Malkia Kahaba" (Queen Whore). Her cheeks grew hot again, but that was nothing compared to Lisa's. Lisa's face could have been easily mistaken for a beetroot, it was so red.

The two were dragged onto their feet. Jennie's hands were tied behind her back, and she was pushed forward. She could't see where they were going, or where she was being led, but the crowd was marching her and Lisa somewhere, and by the noise of the crowd behind her, she could tell she was at the front of it. Gasps and shouts were heard from who was presumably villagers who hadn't been made aware of the situation. Blindfolded, gagged, tied, and naked, she was paraded through the village, shown to everyone who hadn't already been at the gathering. As humiliated and ashamed as she was, she couldn't ignore the heat building up between her legs again. Was she really being turned on by this?

Then someone in the lead of the crowd shouted in gleeful Swahili, something like "I got it!"

Jennie didn't know what he was talking about, but all the was concentrating on was keeping her arousal to a minimum, since her thighs were rubbing together a lot as she walked. But then, out of nowhere, something flat and something that stung hit her ass, and she gave a loud cry, not expecting the sudden pain. They had broken out the crops again, and Lisa let out a similar squeal a second after. Jennie's ass was already sore from its earlier abuse, and the sting was made much worse now. But each hit not only send a jolt of pain through her, but one of pleasure as well. She struggled to keep her moans at bay, and was battling to keep herself from cumming again. She was fighting on multiple fronts, including her own front, and soon enough the armies of pleasure would overtake her defense.

And sure enough, when the crop was brought up into her pussy, she folded. Her entire body shook with the effort of controlling itself, and she bit the cloth in her mouth hard to keep herself from yelling out. A stream of cum leaked out despite her best efforts. The leaders of the mob noticed her decrease in pace and pushed her to keep walking, thankfully not noticing her orgasm. Her whole body felt hot and shaky, whether that was from arousal or humiliation she didn't know.

Before she knew it, they had made a full circle of the village, and her blindfold and gag were removed. While they had been away, some remaining helpers had constructed two large structures that vaguely resembled spits for cooking meat, which were made up of two vertical wooden poles with an adjoining horizontal pole on top, both of which having been laid down on the ground. The crowd had assimilated more members on its tour of the village, and various members were shouting something Jennie couldn't understand over the noise. But she and Lisa were each forced onto one of the respective spits. Jennie's hands were tied to the top pole, and each of her feet was tied to the two outer poles, spread-eagling her across it. Then a rope was tied onto each of her thighs and then connected to the top pole, to support her and make sure she didn't fall. She looked to the side and saw Lisa in the same position, everything on display for the villagers. Tears were gathered in her eyes, but she didn't seem to be too opposed to her current situation.

The crowd left them alone momentarily while they held an internal discussion, no doubt debating how to humiliate the two girls further. They seemed to come to a unanimous conclusion, and the two were suddenly surrounded by men. Jennie got a brief glimpse of the surrounding houses before the mob of guys closed in. And in every direction, they all pulled out their cocks, and in every direction they started stroking their cocks.

Jennie understood their purpose now. She and Lisa would be covered in cum and raised on their spits to be displayed to all passersby. She was mortified at the idea of it, but the idea also sent a thrill of excitement through her and a fresh wave of slick to her lower region.

It was only a couple of minutes before the cum started flowing; Jennie gasped as the first spurt of cum landed directly on her hypersensitive pussy, and then the floodgates were opened and dozens more hit every part of her that was reachable. She closed her eyes and felt the warmth of each white spray covering her body. They focused much of it on her face, but eventually they covered her whole figure with streaks of white cum. A final spurt landed on her outstretched tongue, and then the men dispersed. Her spit was heaved and hoisted into a standing position, leaving her hanging naked about six feet above the ground, well in view of everyone.

And after a few minutes of jeers, ogling and shame, the crowd dispersed and Jennie found herself in a similar position to last time: naked, tied, abandoned, and humiliated. She looked over and locked eyes with Lisa to her left. Tear tracks adorned her beet-red cheeks.

"You okay?" Jennie asked in Korean, so the remaining locals and guards wouldn't understand.

"Yes," Lisa replied, giving a small struggle against her bonds, "I'm good. And you know what?"

"What?"

Lisa suddenly smiled. "You were right, I did like it."

Jennie raised her eyebrows in surprise. "Really? All that, and you enjoyed it?"

Lisa nodded. "But fuck - that hurt. A lot."

Jennie grinned. "That's what makes it good, isn't it?"

Lisa giggled. "You're a really big fucking slut, you know that?" She sighed. "How long do you think we'll be up here?"

Jennie shrugged, as much as was possible with her arms splayed out. "As long as it takes for the guards to get horny again."

Lisa shivered at the thought. "Damn, that felt amazing..."

"Yes, now you see why I was so eager to come back."

"So what happens next?"

"You'll probably be taken down, then fucked again, then the tribe leader will offer you the option of being this tribe's sex slave. You can go back to Korea with me as long as you come back with me every year."

"Not that I will, but if I refuse?" Lisa asked.

"Prison, in which case the same outcome happens."

"Well, even if I had a choice I would still become their slave. Because god...I can't resist that..."

Jennie laughed. "Now who's a slut?"

"Heyyy!" Lisa protested. "I'm not a slut, it's just...well..."

"Who said there's anything wrong with that?" Jennie chuckled.

Lisa blushed. "Ok fine...I'm a slut."

"That's better."

It was about half an hour more that they hung there, with the occasional goggling passerby, talking. But then a small body of guards approached and took the spits down, untying the two girls and dragging them to their feet. Then their hands were tied behind their backs again, and their blindfolds were replaced.

No fanfare was bothered with and no privacy was cared for as the guards removed their loincloths and bent the two over on their knees. Jennie had no time to react whatsoever before a thick, long, and hard cock entered her pussy from behind, and another pushed against her lips until she opened them, which she did, gladly welcoming the shaft into her mouth. Both dicks quickly reached their maximum depth and bottomed out, making Jennie moan and gag simultaneously. She was very sensitive everywhere from the day's abuse and manhandling, and the man fucking her pussy was taking no care to be gentle. Nor was the one in front, who was savagely fucking her throat with no consideration for her rapidly emptying lungs. She choked on the thick meat filling her throat, trying to draw breath, but to no avail. He thrusted his hips forward fully, shoving his entire cock into her throat, keeping her from inhaling anything but his precum. She gagged, trying to pull away, but he held her head there, making her eyes roll back. She choked again, inadvertently jerking, her throat being stretched out by his thick cock. She desperately coughed and choked, fearing that he would facefuck her to unconsciousness, but then he let her go, pulling out of her throat. She gasped in a breath, coughing and panting. He gave her a moment's rest before starting throatfucking her again, but he didn't hold her down. Quick, hard thrusts were given from both sides, and again she felt herself drawing nearer to a climax. She had lost count of how many she'd achieved, but the number, whatever it was, had left her very sensitive and very delicate, and she was loving being absolutely demolished by the tribesmen. They gave no regard for her sensitivity, uninhibitedly drilling her with relentless abandon. Similar noises came from Lisa to Jennie's right; her cute deepthroat sounds and moans could be heard even over Jennie's own.

Then she heard a groan from behind her and a moment later, a deluge of hot cum filled her pussy, shooting deep inside her. The sudden torrent of warmth triggered her oncoming peak as well, and a gush of cum streamed out of her. Her loud "ahhhhng" was muffled and absorbed by the cock in her throat, and its owner succumbed to the orgasmic pleasure Jennie's mouth gave him, and finally buried himself inside it, releasing his load deep down her throat.

The two were given a minute to recover, breathing heavily, until they were heaved to their bedraggled feet once more.

"Well, see you." Lisa called to Jennie in Korean, excitement easily distinguishable in her voice, and then they were led their separate ways. Jennie nodded at her and allowed herself to be steered away towards the sex hut. Jaali was waiting there, in his chair which was pushed against the center post. He gave a small smirk at the sight of her, cheeks flushed and red, naked, covered in semi-dry cum and whip marks, and pushed onto her knees.

"Enjoyed yourself, little slut?"

"Yes, I have, master."

"Last time, of course, you were offered a choice, which I will be giving to your friend once I'm done here. This time, you having already accepted the better option, you have another choice. You can, of course, return to Korea, and await this time next year. But," he continued, a small smirk curling his lips, "our hospitable village would be willing to play host to you and your friend, should you wish to stay a little bit longer to enjoy our...amenities."

Jennie was silent for a moment, and then smiled widely.

A/N: Jesus Christ, it's about time I put this out. It might've been a bit rushed. It's been pretty fun writing this series, and you know I can't leave it like that, so a part 3 will be in order in about...ten years. You're welcome.

[leah-lover]

Good chaos. Mary earps x pundit reader.

Mary spoils her relationship with reader on air.

Ever since you were a kid you loved talking. You started doing it from a very young age. 

you found your comfort in having conversations. Whether it was about the weather, a movie, gossip, or deep concepts you thrived. When you got older you discovered theater, and fell in love with the stage. Cameras and audiences never frightened you. 

Heading into college you chose media as a degree and you were expelled at it which landed you a job in the best company in British television, the BBC. of course your beauty helped in the process but they assured that they cared more about your thoughts and talent of capturing attention and holding meaningful conversation. You started your career by doing interviews on red carpets, and hosting a few talk shows. Your audience grew quickly and you found yourself a household name for half a year, which was unheard of. 

After a few years you grew tired of the facknes od the Hollywood scene but you still loved your job so you decided to change the scenery and go to sports. The change was radical and brought about many questions from your fans. But they stuck by you. You brought a new following to the sport you chose which was women’s football.

Women’s football was on the rise and you saw an opportunity to change the field. 

The WSL felt like the home you needed. The fans of the sport, the atmosphere and the message it transpired was very much up your alley. The thing that helped you feel more at home was the queerness of the game, and the acceptance of the people,  something you have been longing for.

It has now been 8 years since you joined BBC sports. Like many predicted you had a huge following across all the platfomùs, you have won awards and presented many to other people. 

Everybody loved to be interviewed by you. 

Tonight was a special night, it was the last leg of the Olympic qualifying. You as usual were a part of the team that covered the Lionesses games. 

The game was nothing short of exhilarating, after a tough 120 minutes the Egland girls made it to the olympics. Screams and cheers erupted as wembley. The most notable person people were cheering for was Mary Earps , the exceptional goalkeepers or as you have her in your contacts by, lovely girlfriend. 

Mary was protective, she wanted to keep your relationship a secret to protect your career and you as a person. 

You were beyond proud of her, and she was proud of herself too which you described in the sideline interview you did with her.

“ So Mary, that was a stunning performance by you , player of the match, tell me what you think.?” i asked 

“ I think the girls did a wonderful job, cheering the midfield for distributing good balls, the forwards did a fantastic job finishing, and obviously my defender who battled with me today. '' she replied shouting.

“ Well I am most excited for this years’ Olympic games. The competition is very heated. What are your thoughts about that?” 

“ i am looking forward to playing in the olympics, aiming for gold, and having you there as my good luck omen.” 

“ wheel I will make sure to be there all the way.” 

Before leaving she gave you a kiss on the cheek and her hand lingered a little too long on your ass. 

While Mary left to do press conference duties and leave for your home in Manchester, you stayed in London doing some post production work and you undecided to go party with your team after. 

The night was fun, you took a 4 Am flight after and opened your front door around  9 am. It was Mary and your off day so she decided to sleep in. 

“ Good morning my love.” you said kissing her temple, and passing your fingers along her face softly. Without hesitation she picked you up and threw you in the bed next to her. Giggling you kisses her softly again, and again, and again. 

“ So proud of you baby. I love you so much.” 

“ I missed you. I wanted to celebrate with you yesterday. I miss your beautiful body so much.”

“ and my ass.Speaking of my ass, I need to check mùy phone.” 

You moved from Mary’s group which earned you a groan. you then put your phone in the charger and set it on. 

Your phone almost exploded when you opened it. Your notifications were crazy. You Clicked on the first one which was tweet

“ holy shit Mary is for the girls, holy shit she is an ass girl.” under the tweet was snap pon the moment mary kissed you with her hand on your ass. 

“ holy fuck Mary, i think we have been exposed.” you say to here. 

You both looked at the tweets for a little bit. All of the ones you saw were positive and surprising. 

“ Well you have a very good ass baby.” she said. You smack her hand as a response. 

“It was time for people to know that you and your ass are mine now get back into bed so that you can reward me for yesterday.” she added.

“ I have to tweet This first.” you said

“ proud of my goalkeeper. Proud of my girlfriend.” you wrote. 

“ Now let the chaos begin while I create chaos between your legs,” you say to Mary. 

[stevesnightmares]

I don't understand how some people can watch BBC Merlin and, when they are done, complain that it didn't make sense because Merlin didn't fulfil the prophecy. You are the one who doesn't understand the story that is being told. This is not like in Percy Jackson, where we get prophecies and, by the end, we see them come true, even if in unexpected ways. Merlin created his own path with every choice that he made, with every action he took. He could've fulfilled his destiny, he could've saved Arthur and brought on the golden age of Albion, but by making certain choices he wasn't able to fulfil that destiny. He had the ability to do so, but didn't.

In season 1 episode 8, "The Beginning of the End" we are immediately told that Merlin will not fulfill his destiny, he will not protect Arthur and see him bring about the golden age of Albion.

KILGHARRAH If the boy lives, you cannot fulfil your destiny. MERLIN What's he got to do with my destiny? You said it's my destiny to protect Arthur. KILGHARRAH Then you have the answer you seek. MERLIN You're telling me that little boy is going to kill Arthur? KILGHARRAH It seems that is up to you. MERLIN No. You can't know that for certain. KILGHARRAH You have it in your power to prevent a great evil. MERLIN There must be another way! The future isn't set in stone! KILGHARRAH You must let the boy die.

By saving Mordred, Merlin sealed Arthur's fate and signed his death. He made a choice and that choice had its consequences.

Another clear example of Merlin's choices affecting, well, everything, is in season 2 episode 8, "Sins of the Father".

Merlin's goal is to make Arthur see that magic isn't all bad, to make the genocide of magic wielders stop, to bring magic back to Camelot so that he and every other magic person can live freely as themselves.

When meeting with Morgouse, Arthur begins to go towards the right path.

ARTHUR What if my father's attitude to magic is wrong? MERLIN You really think that?

ARTHUR Perhaps it's not as simple as he would have us believe. Morgause is a sorcerer, she has caused us no harm. Surely not everyone who practices magic can be evil.

He's starting to see that maybe not everyone who uses magic uses it for evil, that magic users can be good.

ARTHUR You speak of hunted her kind like animals! How many hundreds have you condemned to death to ease your guilt?

He's also seeing that Uther hates magic because of personal reasons and not because all magic is really bad.

This was the perfect opportunity, the perfect opening to bring Arthur on the right side. But what does Merlin do?

MERLIN Morgause is lying! She's an enchantress. She tricked you. That was not your mother you saw. That was an illusion. Everything...everything your mother said to you...those were Morgause's words. This has been her plan all along! To turn you against your father. And if you kill him, the kingdom will be destroyed! This is what she wants!

He tells Arthur that it's all a lie and that the sorcerer is evil, that once again those who use magic only want to see Camelot fall.

ARTHUR I am indebted to you, Merlin. I had become...confused. It is once again clear to me that those who practice magic are evil and dangerous. And that is thanks to you.

He solidified Arthur's belief that magic is evil and bad.

My point isn't to decide whether Merlin's choices were good or bad, right or wrong, we follow him, we see why he does what he does, how much he cares for Arthur and for others, we see his flaws and his shortcomings and we can't blame him for any of his choices because all of them, even the most misguided ones, were all done in good faith.

The point is that that's what the show is about: a young warlock in his quest to save Arthur and how his choices bring him to his failure. From season 1 he was doomed to fail because of his choices. At least that's how I see it. People were expecting to see Merlin fulfil the prophecy and some claim that he did, but imo the whole show is about how his choices doomed him and made him not fulfil his destiny.

UTHER You [Merlin] have proven yourself to be a trusted ally in the fight against magic.

[adeptune01]

Okay I have some bbc Merlin thoughts…

This is perhaps the most devastating end to a TV show of all time (and yes I watched the Supernatural finale but I stand by this).

Merlin’s ENTIRE purpose in life was to support the Once and Future King- Arthur. Every action he took kept that goal in mind and time and time again he risked his life to save Arthur’s. Every single character he came into contact with told him that Arthur wasn’t worth saving- that magic would never return until his death- and every time Merlin defended him. He did whatever he thought was best for Arthur- no matter the cost.

Because that was who he was.

If he didn’t constantly fight for Arthur he would no longer be himself. They were two sides of the same coin- fused together, inseparable, meaningless without the other. It was never an option to leave.

So the entire show was Merlin marching down the path of fate, knowing how it will end, and going anyways…holding on to that desperate hope that maybe this time it would be different. Maybe someday he will have done enough.

It’s that age old question of if you know the future do you truly have free will? If god has plans for you, does it mean you’re chosen or cursed?

And right at the end he was given hope! He saw the future! He could stop this! Stop everything! If only he could get there in time…but he was too late…and the universe let him have one last wild journey…but Arthur still died in his arms. His final words, ones Merlin needed and deserved to hear, gone with him.

The worst part is…we know he would do it all over, just for the opportunity to see him again. And who knows? Maybe this time he would do it right. This time he would save him.

And around and around it goes.

This and the show’s magic-queerness allegory, fantastical whimsy, beautiful relationships, impeccable sound production…I could go on and on

[yonderghostshistories]

HAPPY 13TH ANNIVERSARY TO “HOLY FLYING CIRCUS” (2011) 🥳🎉🎊🎂🎈

(Aka the best Monty Python biopic imho)

It’s been 13 BLOODY years since HFC aired on this day (19th October) at 9:00pm on BBC 4 in the year of our lord 2011, but it’s only been a few months since I (and many other of my mutuals) watched and rewatched it this year, and I will always treasure the times that I have seen this wonderful movie!

I remember when I was a newly fresh faced MP fan in 2023 and was slowly and gradually getting into them, and that I was wondering if there was ever a biopic made about Monty Python? I mean, it would be kinda weird that there wasn’t a biopic made about Monty Python, ya’know considering that they were very much influential in the world of comedy and beyond, that it would obviously be a missed opportunity to NOT make a biopic about them.

I then went and logged on into one of the school computers at my secondary school to look up if there was a Monty Python Biopic, in which I googled smth along the lines of “Monty Python Biopic”, and LO and behold, HFC was (iirc) the first result that came up!

I was IMMEDIATELY intrigued to see what HFC was all about, and so I looked at and read the plot synopsis for HFC on IMDb. At the time, it was honestly really cool and interesting fr! Then I looked at the cast and…well. I wasn’t immediately put off by the fact that the cast for the HFC Pythons weren’t exactly 100% identical to the irl Pythons, like they were similar to them but JUST different enough to have a sorta distinct, uncanny feeling to them. But ngl, at the time when I saw photos of the cast, I did have a feeling that was like “ughh….this is soooo obviously cheap, why couldn’t they have gotten a bigger budget for this?”, and now looking back, I do recognise that HFC was, well, made on a BBC 4 budget (aka a low budget, at least for BBC 4) and that the cast and crew had to work with what they had (both in terms costumes and hair) and tbh I was kinda a bit mean on them at that time and that do I regret it. I mean, I still don’t forgive some of the HFC Pythons’ hair cuz OMG Steve Punt/Eric and Phil Nichol/Terry G’s hair is still kinda not good lol 😂 but I do understand why it is what it is.

Anyway, I digress!

It was because of this (plus looking at some rather quite negative reviews of HFC) that I STILL wanted to check out HFC and see what it’s about, but I had INCREDIBLY low expectations for it. At best thinking that HFC would be at least kinda decent, but at worst thinking that it would be kinda mediocre and not the worst but definitely not the best. So, for Christmas 2023, I asked my Dad (iirc) to buy me the DVD for HFC (as well as some other DVDs, those being “A Liar’s Autobiography” the book, the animated film adaptation “A Liar’s Autobiography” (2012), “Remember Me” (2014) starring Michael Palin, “A Field in England” (2013) and “In the Earth” (2021), the latter 2 cuz I was really into the League of Gentlemen/Inside No. 9/Reece Shearsmith at the time and also cuz I love me a bit of horror!). Then came January/February 2024, and I got my DVDs by that time!

(Here’s a crappy looking (affectionate) picture I took of them back in February when I still used my Android phone to take pictures of stuff)

Then I…..didn’t watch them (and in this case HFC) for a couple months after I got them (mostly due to school and exams and shit which made me kinda exhausted and so I didn’t watch much stuff during that time cuz of it), BUT! BUT BUT BUT!!

It was on a somewhat regular day on the 20th of May 2024, when I finally, FINALLY AFTER ALL THIS TIME OF LAYING IT OFF AGAIN AND AGAIN (again due to the exams and studying for said exams and shit) that I decided to finally get the courage to watch HFC in its entirety!! Also cuz I needed to give myself a bit of stress relief and also a lil reward for studying too much lol.

I got the HFC DVD from my living room shelf, I took the HFC DVD out from the plastic cover, I then got my DVD player and carefully inserted the HFC DVD into the DVD player so as to NOT potentially break it, and then…..I finally watched it.

It was…..quite the experience (and I mean this in the most positive way ever!)

Watching the film for the first time genuinely, like GENUINELY, floored my previously low expectations of it. Like, fr IT WAS CRAZY. AND AMAZING. AND WONDERFUL. AND SURREAL. AND FUNNY. Like, it was honestly the best thing I ever watched at that time!!

The HFC Python cast, who I thought was not gonna be the best, was actually fr incredible! Not only did they all get their respective irl Pythons’ mannerisms and expressions on point, but their unique take on each Python was genuinely charming and interesting fr! Especially Charles Edwards/Michael and Darren Boyd/John and their relationship between each other in the film was indeed very captivating to watch (and a lil gay and fan service-y, to which I also love it for that <33).

Speaking of which, Charles Edwards as Michael Palin was unironically the best thing about this film, not only for his voice and mannerisms but his character as well!! Like fr CHARLIE EDWARDS FR LOOKS LIKE ACTUAL MICHAEL PALIN LIKE WHAT?!!?!!

Darren Boyd as John Cleese was also quite great too, like, even if he portrayed him as the “Basil Fawlty Persona” version of John, I felt like it was still pretty much like John’s character, and Darren Boyd/John does show little moments of genuine vulnerability, which make it really more profound imo!

Rufus Jones as Terry Jones, Phil Nichol as Terry Gilliam, Steve Punt as Eric Idle and Tom Fisher as Graham Chapman were also pretty great in this as well! But ESPECIALLY Tom Fisher/Gray as HE ABSOLUTELY STOLE THE SHOW IN THIS MOVIE FR, AND THAT HE ABSOLUTELY SLAYED AS GRAY AND I LOVE HIS JACKETS, HIS SEXINESS, HIS QUOTES, HIS GAYNESS, HIS WISENESS, HIS EVERYTHING AGHHHHH (also he’s really beautiful imo). Like with Charles Edwards/Michael and Darren Boyd/John, their performances as their each respective Python was really amazing, such as Phil Nichol exhibiting Terry G’s childlike craziness and goblin-like energy, to Rufus Jones/Jonesy also acting/double role-ing as Michael’s Wife (in a loving homage to Jonesy playing most of the female characters in MPFC and the films with absolute PERFECTION) to Steve Punt/Eric being very much onto the business side of Python (in which he’s referred to as a “money grabbing bastard”, which I almost quote all the time haha).

Also shoutout to the supporting cast of HFC, they also carried the movie too! My personal favourites being Jason Thorpe as the rude and annoying and obnoxious boss (and very funny) Alan Dick and the LoB obsessed but with good intentions Christian with a stutter Desmond Lovely, Simon Greenall as the Pythons’ Manager/Film Distributor Barry, Paul Chahidi as the meek and trying to make things go well Harry Balls, and Stephen Fry as God (cuz Stephen Fry is an absolute ⚡️✨ ICON ✨⚡️fr)!

Oh yeah, also, I LOVE THE ANIMATIONS AHHHH THEYRE SO AMAZEBALLS FRRR!!!! AND I ABSOLUTELY LOVE LOVE LOVE THE MUSIC TOOO!!!! SHOUTOUT TO THE ANIMATION TEAM AND MUSIC COMPOSER FOR HFC, THEY DESERVE IT FR AND DESERVE ALOT OF APPRECIATION!!!

Also, this movie is fr so funny frfr, have I mentioned that it’s really funny? Cuz it’s really funny! It’s also (like Holy Grail) very quotable indeed, and there’s a lot like ALOT of quotes from HFC that live in my head rent free! My personal favourites among them are:

-“It’s Half Logical, Half Silly!”

-“Eric is a Money Grabbing Bastard!”

-“Glass of Cordial? S P O T O F S O U P ?”

-“Are you Willy waving at Jesus?”

-“Well, I am Gay, I like Neeews, it’s very good for film reviieeewwws 😌😏”

The ways this movie have changed my life for the better (and for the sillier) is that I’ve gone through the rabbit hole and have discovered many, MANY amazing shows and films starring each of the HFC Python actors, for example; “Treacle Jr” (2010) and “The Nine Lives of Tomas Katz” (2000) (both films starring Tom Fisher) are genuinely pretty great and I do recommend you watch them if you can! Plus I bought them and other projects starring each HFC Python on DVD cuz it shows how much I’m THAT dedicated to this movie (HFC) fr, and that I’m fr grateful for discovering this little BBC 4 Pythonesque comedy drama from 2011, cuz if i hadn’t, I’d have missed out on some real great stuff!

I will always love “Holy Flying Circus” (2011) for the rest of my life, and I will always appreciate and treasure it with my entire heart 🫶❤️, and I will continue watching and rewatching it and continue fanning about it into the future! I’m very lucky that HFC came into my life and that I watched it, and that I don’t think I’d be quite the same if I hadn’t the courage to watch the film on the 20th May 2024.

It’ll soon be almost 1 hour to the time (that being 9:00pm) when HFC aired on the 19th of October in 2011 by the time I’m writing this, so I’d like to quickly wrap up by saying:

Thank you “Holy Flying Circus” (2011). Just, thank you ☺️🫶❤️…..

And remember:

“Eric is a Money Grabbing Bastard”.

[vandalyssm]

Theory: Merlin's Recent Publicity and its Correlation to a Possible Sequel/Revival/Reboot (+Eoin Macken's Pseudo Merlin Project)

'Ello. Fancied sharing my thoughts on recent developments regarding BBC's Merlin.

Fair, firm warning: I'm only sharing speculations and my personal opinions on the matter, and I do not advertise them as fact whatsoever. Consider them musings (or delusions, your choice). You can use this to further fuel your hope of the slim chance that this beloved show will see the light of day once again or maybe make theories of your own. Dispelling it is also an option, as I cannot assure my arguments would be free from flaws.

Right. Without further ado...

Revival of the Official Merlin Twitter Account

Let's put this into scenario.

Imagine a dated piece of media, previously well-known worldwide and had its own golden age for a time. This media launched the last of its contents over a decade ago, yet it gained a loyal, devoted following that persisted to grow and continued the legacy of the franchise over the years. Though there were highs and lows, the community remained alive for an impressive amount of time, steadily producing art, fiction, and creations dedicated to the media, despite not having anything new to work with. This devotion is acknowledged by those from an outsider's perspective, including the creators of this media (cast, staff, and distributors alike).

To put into context, the community was left unsatisfied with how the media ended, and many wished for the media to return. Articles were written, petitions were signed, comments left on the cast' social media accounts, and even questions were asked directly to them. Although different in wording, the inquired notion remained the same: Will there be a possibility of a sequel/revival/return/reboot? The answers range from a neutral, vague reply to a more resounding no.

This cycle persisted, but the people were immovable; they were visionaries and their dream lived on in their hearts. And this did not go unnoticed.

So it continued... until one of the media's social accounts made a sudden return. Out of nowhere, without a warning. They're back for good, the account announced. It sent the community into a frenzy. But if you took a step back from the excitement, you'd notice that it's strange. Why would a media ended over a decade ago suddenly be promoted again?

Now, I'm going to explore two possibilities; pragmatic and idealistic. The previous hypothetical scenario lays the general principal of Merlin's relevance (duh).

I'll make the pragmatic perspective brief. FremantleMedia saw the opportunity to make some bucks from Merlin because of the loyal fanbase, using a no-cost yet effective method to keep us tuned in; hoping. OMG, what does this mean? Does this mean they're going make a sequel?! Holy shit, they're teasing us, aren't they? I can't believe this is happening, it's a dream come true! And so on and so forth. Evidently, it works and numbers are growing. The official Merlin twitter account is racking up more followers and likes with each post. In this possibility, there's no such thing as a sequel/whatever it is the fanbase hopes for; just a reanimated corpse doing the same silly tap dance while we holler at it, dumbly hoping that they bust out new moves.

Now, the fun part. The idealistic version!

I'm going to use a real life example for my theory: the upcoming release of Dragon's Dogma 2. With a quick Google search, you can learn that Dragon's Dogma 2 is the highly awaited sequel for its well-liked predecessor, Dragon's Dogma.

For some time, Dragon's Dogma was on sale on Steam (with a decent cut too). This was done to gain the attention of...

1. those who haven't previously dived into the franchise. It's to make them think 'Wow! This game's so good. Oh, there's a sequel of it that's gonna be released soon? With even better graphics and gameplay? Sign me the fuck up!'. You liked Blueberry Cheesecake, so it'd make sense that you'd be more open to buying Double Blueberry Cheesecake, Premium Ingredients Addition, with 2 additional paid toppings.

2. Veterans and nostalgic fans. 'They're promoting the game I liked years ago... Oh, well, it won't hurt to play it again, just for the nostalgia. It never really left my mind anyway."

In other words: hype! hype! hype!

If using this principle, then the possibility of a sequel/revival/reboot/new content exists. It's either being processed (wishful thinking, not as likely) or being considered (more likely). If it's the latter, then they're testing the waters to see how much people still care/how much money they'll make. The more attention and hype it gets, the higher the likelihood.

Simplified:

P (old media pushed for publicity) -> Q (hype built)

Q (hype built) -> R (new content)

Eoin Macken's Pseudo Merlin Project

If I recall correctly, Eoin Macken first announced a pseudo Merlin project in late 2020. It's first teased to be released in 2021, but nothing came out of it so far (at the time of writing this) except if you count the small handful of times Macken hinted it over the ongoing four year period.

Now, I understand his position. First and foremost, he needs the legal rights to actually produce anything and it's no easy feat when you're dealing with a massive company. Then there's the issue of costumes, props, sets, and equipment. A lot to consider. To put it simply, he must offer the company something worth more than the show itself or contribute in their favor in some way. Macken seems like a charming and capable guy, so he can make it work. Probably.

I lean towards the spin-off theory because a cast reunion would not take four years. As far as I know, Macken is close with the knights and they could get together at any convenient time. If the project was a zoom call or a recorded get-together, it would've been released already. To compare, by using the average of 385,000 babies born each day during the last three years, we have 421,575,000 newborns before the Pseudo Merlin Project.

I want to tie this in with the previous theory, but eh. It can connect, but not really. I don't have any further explanation or evidence since Macken hasn't given any news.

---

Anyways. That's enough of this. I hope it made sense, at least it did to me. I'm entering my third year in the fandom, so I'm relatively new and still hopeful. (Though I try hard to keep my feet on the ground while I stare up at the clouds.)

To end this post, I'd like to say: keep hoping. Hope is such a stupidly beautiful thing, and it should be nurtured. Turn that feeling into art, into efforts.

There are franchises revived 2-3 decades after, and Merlin is no exception.

[timeagainreviews]

Bombastically Subtle: The Giggle

In my review for “The Power of the Doctor,” I talked about the power of lowering expectations. It’s good to approach Doctor Who with an open mind as it leaves room for being pleasantly surprised. One major truth for the Doctor Who fandom is how often we play ourselves with our expectations. We get it in our heads how something is supposed to be and we get mad that it isn’t that thing. That being said, there is a rational standard to be expected. Before “Journey to the Centre of the TARDIS,” aired, I had a small list of things I wanted to see in the TARDIS. Things which if included, would mean they didn’t waste the opportunity. I wanted to see a big gothic library. Check! I wanted to see the swimming pool. Check! I wanted to see a room that looked like the outdoors. Check! I wanted to see an M.C. Escher room like from “Castrovalva.” Well, three out of four ain’t bad. Speaking of three out of four, remember “The Celestial Toymaker”?

Of the 97 missing episodes of Doctor Who, three are from the four-part story “The Celestial Toymaker.” It would be four out of four, but the last episode “The Final Test,” was eventually returned to BBC in 1984 but wasn’t made available to the public until 1991. For years, all fans had left of this story was the Target novelisation and their imaginations. You could argue that “The Celestial Toymaker,” is a story which has benefitted from going missing. It enjoys a sort of mythic status no effects budget from 1966 could ever live up to. So when it was revealed that the Toymaker would be returning to Doctor Who in “The Giggle,”  I saw it as an opportunity for them to finally give us the episode that has existed in our collective imagination for decades. 

It makes sense that it took 57 years to return the Toymaker to the screen. It’s easier to write “The Doctor sees himself in puppet form,” than it is to film. Words may be the cheapest way to put big images in our heads, but we’ve got Disney money now. Doctor Who can finally afford to give the Toymaker the visuals he deserves. And the episode delivers on those visuals. It’s as mindbending and dazzling as you would expect for a trickster from the Island of Misfit Toys. Not only are the visuals impressive, but they’re also creative. That last bit is something people often forget. Style is everything. The Toymaker’s old-timey shop is beautiful and this design aesthetic carries over to visuals he produces. He feels appropriately out of time and timeless. I wanted to say this upfront because, honestly, there is so much more going on than stellar visuals.

One complaint I’ve seen consistently about the 60th Anniversary Specials is that they often seem like pale imitations of what came before. Just last week I compared “Wild Blue Yonder,” unfavourably to “Midnight,” but I had to concede to the fact that these specials are a bit of an homage to all of Doctor Who. Of course, there are similarities, it’s a celebration of 60 years of Doctor Who. That would be like complaining that they put a Santa robot in a Christmas episode. “The Star Beast,” harkens to alien invasion stories and evil dictators. “Wild Blue Yonder,” is like our “Midnight,” “The Edge of Destruction,” and “Heaven Sent,” type stories with a healthy dose of body horror. And “The Giggle,” is a bit more like “The Ultimate Foe,” “The Mind Robber,” or even “The Sound of Drums.” If these episodes are, as Russell T Davies said, the finale to the 2005 series, they’re a fitting send-off. 

Much like “Wild Blue Yonder,” I found the introduction to “The Giggle,” to be the weakest section of the episode. Something about both scenes in both episodes had unnatural dialogue and poor pacing. It feels almost as though the episodes are both trying their best to get going as fast as possible. It makes sense when you consider that a major plot point is that the Doctor doesn’t take time to rest. Also, there is a lot of information to be imparted within three episodes. Regardless, I got a little nervous by Neil Patrick Harris’ over-the-top German accent bouncing off of Charlie de Melo’s confused face. But when Banerjee says to the Toymaker that his accent was slipping, I relaxed a bit. It’s like when Dorothy Vallens tears her bad wig off in “Blue Velvet.” You think “Oh thank god, they realise it’s unrealistic.”

I love the inclusion of John Logie Baird into the story. Not only is he from Scotland (my newfound home), but an oft-overlooked person in history. Using the inventor of television to celebrate one of Britain’s oldest TV shows feels appropriate. RTD said in an interview that he started reading up on Baird while working on his miniseries “Nolly.” Initially, the only villain of the story was going to be the puppet, Stooky Bill, but Davies realised that might look a bit naff so he considered who might be the puppet master and the Toymaker was a natural fit. I love hearing how writers form stories from seemingly disparate elements. Had RTD never written “Nolly,” we would have probably not seen the Toymaker, which would have been a different 60th anniversary altogether.

Thanks to things like “Doctor Who Unleashed,” and the commentaries, we’ve been given some intriguing insights into Davies’ creative process. Initially, he worried that the Toymaker was too ancient a character for modern fans to care about, but that never stopped Steven Moffat from introducing a new generation of fans to the Great Intelligence. He also took time to discuss the Toymaker’s racist roots. While I’ve never once thought of the Toymaker as yellowface, I can see how their use of the word “celestial,” and his Chinese silks might send the wrong message in this day and age. It’s funny then that that is also the reason he decided to give the Toymaker various accents, as a call back to his problematic nature. He is a villain after all. But is it really racist to make fun of Germans? I prefer my friend Taryn’s explanation that the Toymaker changes his voice often because the Doctor originally beat him by impersonating his voice.

With London at each other’s throats, it’s easy to see why UNIT would be relieved to see the Doctor. I half-expected Kate Stewart to slap the Doctor, but instead, she greets him with a hug. In the words of the Doctor- “This is new!” Now it’s been said before, so I’ll just agree that yes UNIT HQ looks like Avengers tower. We’ve already established that RTD is taking a page out of the Marvel playbook, no need to belabour the point. Back at UNIT, the Doctor is reintroduced to some familiar faces. We see Kate Stewart, Shirley Bingham, but most excitingly, Mel Bush. That’s right, I said “excitingly,” and “Mel Bush,” in the same sentence. I once met Bonnie Langford at a convention and I feel like she could tell I was lying when I said “I liked you in Doctor Who,” because in all honesty, I didn’t. But after rewatching “Paradise Towers,” and admiring Mel’s individuality in the face of the mocking Kangs, I thought “Maybe Hughie Lewis was right, it is hip to be square.” Furthermore, I knew RTD would do her right.

Something I’ve really enjoyed about the RTD2 era is how he has somewhat elevated the role of companion. Too often in the show's history have the companions been forced into the role of audience surrogate, fit only to ask the Doctor what’s happening and to get captured. Both Mel and Donna are rocking shit at their computer consoles. Finally, a writer who remembered Mel is a computer wiz, go figure! And of course, the best temp in Chiswick is leading the attack. But beyond being useful, he’s allowing the companions to have actual depth of emotion. Mel’s life doesn’t feel like a sad sack existence that landed her in a support group. She had a fun life with Glitz. Furthermore, it was a life she chose. There’s no baggage between her and the Doctor, just delight.

The Doctor learns that it’s not just Londoners losing their minds, but the whole world. Even our beloved Trinity Wells has fallen prone to the vitriol on her Fox News-esque talk show. The source of this anger is an arpeggiated laugh over the image of the first-ever televised face- Stooky Bill. This of course is the aspect that reminded me most of the “Utopia/The Sound of Drums/Last of the Time Lords” three-parter. Like the rhythmic heartbeats of a Time Lord, this signal has laid dormant on every television, computer, tablet, and phone screen for years. This is, of course, Russell T Davies’ comment on the current state of discourse on the internet these days. And in another way, it’s his comment on the state of the Doctor Who fandom lately. He seems well aware of the divisions in the fandom and it’s nice to see that aside from the sexists, racists, and transphobes, he’s interested in bringing the rest of us together, but I digress.

In what may be one of the most effective scenes in the whole episode, Kate Stewart removes her Zeedex, a device invented by the mysterious Vlinx to inhibit the effects of the giggle signal. After removing it, we watch in horror as our beloved Kate Stewart devolves into a paranoid ableist bigot who hates gingers. Jemma Redgrave gives a chilling and vulnerable performance that was hard to watch. I found myself choked up seeing her in this state, and watching her profusely apologise to Shirley afterwards was heartbreaking. That said, I loved Shirley’s reaction. It’s nice that RTD in his desire to portray marginalised people hasn’t forgotten that we’re not all helpless. Shirley understood the situation and she’s strong enough to take it. Even more, I loved it when the Doctor snapped at her with a bit of sass. It’s good to see Davies treating this new diverse cast as flawed and vulnerable people. He’s not ticking boxes, these are real characters.

The Doctor begins to get an inkling as to who they are dealing with. The words “puppetmaster,” and “toying with,” begin entering his vocabulary. The hairs on the back of his neck stand on end as something deep inside him is screaming “Toymaker!” Having correlated the mass outbreak of violence with the launch of a South Korean satellite, Kate gets permission from the Doctor to take out the satellite with a Galvanic beam. I loved how it was the Doctor’s job as President of the World to give the command. He must have hated that. Eagle-eyed viewers will remember galvanic radiation as the poisonous light from the planet Midnight. Once again RTD calls back to one of his best stories. Meanwhile, Donna hits Kate up for a job at UNIT netting her six figures a year and five weeks of holiday. Go Donna! While all of this is happening, Shirley has traced the original Stooky Bill broadcast back to SoHo in 1925. The Doctor and Donna pile into the TARDIS to follow this lead which takes them to the Toymaker’s shopfront.

What I love most about including the Toymaker is that it has introduced magic into Doctor Who. The ‘70s gave us many occult storylines, but even then most of them could be explained with science. Seldom does Doctor Who give us a storyline where the Doctor is unable to explain what happened. We got the Beast in “The Impossible Planet/The Satan Pit,” and the haunted house from “The Chimes of Midnight,” but for the most part, magic has never been real in Doctor Who. Not even the Carrionites used actual magic in their word-based witchcraft. Perhaps RTD’s time working on “Wizards vs Aliens,” rubbed off on him. Either way, it’s an interesting way to breathe new life into Doctor Who. The Doctor hasn’t really ever dealt with actual magic and I am curious how it will affect him moving forward. Superman is one of the most powerful beings in DC comics, but along with Kryptonite, one of his greatest weaknesses is magic. Magic plays by its own rules.

As a being governed by magic, the Toymaker is bound to a set of rules. The Toymaker takes pride in his rules, so much so that when Donna implies he’ll cheat the Doctor, he looks genuinely offended. There is clear animosity between the Doctor and the Toymaker that is palpable throughout the story. The Doctor even antagonises the Toymaker by implying he is a slave to his rules of play. The Toymaker isn’t just interested in revenge, he wants to humiliate the Doctor in front of the person who loves him the most- Donna. He attempts to weaken her faith in the Doctor by illustrating the Doctor’s past failures to save his companions while highlighting the ways the Doctor justifies his failures. The one thing the Toymaker didn’t consider is that Donna knows this about the Doctor already. He can’t break her faith in a man she regularly puts in his place. This woman once called the Doctor “a thin line of alien nothing.” Do your worst, Toymaker, because Donna has already said it and more.

The real secret behind this episode’s success is in its subtlety, which is hard to imagine in a story where a man turns bullets into flowers while singing to the Spice Girls. Despite all of the big colourful chaos, the most effective moves are quiet. I mentioned in my review for “The Star Beast,” that Davies was more successful in his moments of subtlety than his big declarations, and here is no different. The Doctor and Toymaker play a simple card game. The Doctor loses this game but wins on the technicality that they are now even. There’s no way the Toymaker can allow for a tie, a winner must be decided. You can’t beat the Toymaker with bullets or Osterhagen Keys, but rather by playing his games. Underneath all of the expensive CGI and set design, it ultimately comes down to a game of wits. This is classic Doctor Who, “The Brain of Morbius” stuff.

That art of subtlety had seemed all but gone with the Chibnall era. I grew tired of the Doctor constantly knowing everything and never being out of her depth. It’s good to see the Doctor still has to solve things. It’s why I’ve enjoyed seeing Tennant skulking around being a detective. It’s why people always harp on about “show don’t tell.” It’s better to see how the Doctor slowly pieces things together than for the Doctor to tell us upfront. Knowing everything is not what makes the Doctor clever. Knowing nothing, having no plan, and discovering the path is far more gratifying to see. Ultimately it comes down to Davies having a better understanding of the Doctor as a character. The Doctor is flawed, vain, aloof, and prone to getting frazzled. Its his ability to soldier on that makes him special. The Doctor’s strength isn’t in knowing everything, it’s in knowing his limitations. You can’t learn if you have everything figured out.

While we’re on the subject of subtle changes and Chibnall, it might be worth it to discuss how this story addresses “The Timeless Children,” because I’ve seen zero people talking about it. When the Toymaker flashes the gold tooth in his disturbingly toothy grin, he tells us a little more than the Master’s fate. In a blink-and-you-miss-it line, he implies that he turned the Doctor’s timeline into a jigsaw puzzle. It’s such a subtle moment that it’s not surprising that most people missed it. But think for a moment- what recently turned the Doctor’s life into a convoluted mess? The Timeless Child storyline, of course. I love this line because it does two things. First, it allows the people who enjoyed “The Timeless Children,” to continue on in their enjoyment. Secondly, it allows those of us who disliked it to compartmentalise the storyline into something that finally made sense as a plan devised by a villain. If you ever wondered why the Timeless Child storyline was necessary, you now have a canon explanation- it wasn’t.

Unable to foresee the Doctor’s clever escape clause or Donna’s ability to bash a doll against a wall (love love loved that by the way), the Toymaker decides to change the playing field from his Toyshop to UNIT HQ. Neil Patrick Harris seems to be having the time of his life terrorising UNIT to the tune of “Spice Up Your Life.” At first you think “Oh how funny,” and then you see Mel take a tumble and you think “Woah man, that’s an elderly woman there!” As he gleefully turns two soldiers into a pile of colourful plastic balls, the act is no longer cute. The Toymaker is a horrifying monster with no conscience. Our lives are playthings in his hands and he must be stopped.

This scene illustrates beautifully the exciting possibilities of a magical Whoniverse. The Brigadier once famously quipped “You know, just once I'd like to meet an alien menace that wasn't immune to bullets.” Turning bullets into flowers certainly fits the bill, but it begs an even deeper question- how do you fight an enemy that is immune to science? Kate Stewart took great pride in reforming UNIT to be more science-based, but magic doesn’t care about facts. Magic rewrites reality. The Doctor tries to comfort Shirley by explaining that the Toymaker can change atomic matter with his mind, but admits that even that is a poor explanation. Both the Doctor and UNIT are in new territory. It really ups the danger and makes you wonder how the Doctor will adapt. I said in my review of “The Star Beast,” that the sonic screwdriver was like a magic wand and perhaps it may need to become one! Sorry, War Doctor, it’s no longer a scientific instrument.

Exasperated by the Doctor’s trickery, the Toymaker shocks by shooting the Doctor with the Galvanic beam, stating that he wants to play the final game with the next Doctor. This jumpstarts a new regeneration, but as we all know, it’s not your usual regeneration. But before we get into that, I would like to discuss the moments leading up to that infamous moment because some interesting stuff happens. Having Donna and Mel join the Doctor’s side was exciting because we’re so used to the Doctor regenerating in a blast of energy powerful enough to destroy TARDIS consoles and Dalek ships. It’s easy to forget that the Doctor used to regenerate surrounded by his friends. So there the Doctor stands, surrounded by what the Eleventh Doctor would refer to as “the ultimate ginge.” I think we all sort of expected to hear the Doctor say something like “I don’t want to go,” or “I’m ready to go,” and I applaud RTD for avoiding both in favour of a far more appropriate “Allons y!”

Now, if you’re a terminally online Doctor Who fan like myself, you’d probably read the leak about bi-generation and were therefore not surprised. I kind of regret it because it turned out to be true. I am so used to “leaks,” and “fan theories,” being wrong that I expected the same here. However, part of me is somewhat glad I read the leak as it gave me time to think about the concept. I had seen people immediately hate the idea, so I think a part of me decided to be fair. After all, if you read just the synopsis of any story, divorced of all context and tone, you might also say “That sounds terrible.” In context to the rest of this episode, and what came after, bi-geneation was an absolute joy to behold.

Usually when we get a regeneration, we get maybe 20 seconds to enjoy the new Doctor and then have to wait a few months to see more. But here we not only get to meet Ncuti Gatwa’s Fifteenth Doctor, we get to see him in a mult-Doctor episode with David Tennant! What a treat. Immediately I took to Ncuti as he tells the Fourteenth Doctor to push and then admits he doesn’t know that it will work. This is all new to him as well. I said above that I like when the Doctor is slightly out of his depth, and this is no exception. I will say it’s very lucky for both of them that one of them got the pants and the other got the trousers. Can you imagine that scene playing out with one of them having a Winnie the Pooh thing going on? However, they did miss a chance to call back to the Twelfth Doctor by not giving the Doctor question mark underpants. Oh well.

After watching this episode I asked Taryn what she thought about the Fifteenth Doctor and she told me that she felt it was too early to tell. I then pointed out that while we don’t fully know his personality yet, there was no point during which he didn’t feel like the Doctor. Ncuti takes to the role like a fish in water. He is the Doctor and I cannot wait to learn more about his personality. But first, we have a Toymaker to banish. Now I’ve seen people complain that a game of catch was a disappointing climax to the story, but I disagree. Both of the games the Doctor plays against the Toymaker are simple. Which card face is higher? Can you catch the ball without dropping? It’s nice to have a simple solution against a backdrop of heavy special effects. There are some comical moments such as when Fifteen throws the ball as if he’s trying to win against Fourteen. Also just seeing Ncuti run around in his pants was very funny. Ultimately it is the Toymaker who drops the ball. The Fourteenth Doctor takes his prize in the form of banishing him from our universe forever, but not before the Toymaker warns of his minions spilling into our reality. I was reminded of the “Babylon 5” spin-off “Crusade,” where the Shadows of B5 had been defeated, but their minions continued to plague the galaxy. Or if you’re a Tolkien nerd, it’s like when Sauron continued the work of Morgoth. It’s very exciting stuff.

They continue to set things up for future episodes. They call back to the salt thing from “Wild Blue Yonder,” when Kate orders her men to encase the Toymaker’s box in salt. They also give us a hint of future Master appearances when a mysterious hand with cherry red nail polish retrieves the Toymaker’s tooth. Is it just me or was that lady floating? Because I can’t tell where she would have been standing. But most exciting of all would be the implications of bi-generation and the Fifteenth Doctor’s prize of splitting the TARDIS. According to Davies, he sees this as something that happens across every regeneration. Now every Doctor goes on to have further adventures with their own TARDIS. I’ll be honest, I like this idea less, but that’s mostly just because it’s a bit messy. But why I like it is that it makes a case for its existence. Doctor Who has always been slightly metafictional. Do you need to replace an actor? Well, now the Doctor’s body can change. But this has also introduced a problem into the show which is that if an actor gets too old to play their Doctor, you have to come up with some weird excuse as to why they now look old and bald. But not anymore! While the concept of time streams would have been a cleaner and more wibbly wobbly way to approach this issue, I’m fine with this explanation. It serves a purpose and fixes one of the show’s oldest conundrums.

One aspect the fandom still seems a bit murky on is whether or not the Fourteenth Doctor will still go on to become the Fifteenth Doctor. I’ve seen some people wonder if the Fourteenth Doctor might go on to become the Currator. But I like to think it’s more like a Clara thing where he’ll eventually return to his original point of death to bi-generate into Ncuti Gatwa. One reason I think this is because the Fifteenth Doctor feels at peace with himself. I like to imagine this is due to living a life with the Noble-Temple-Mott family. Something inside the Doctor heals and he’s eventually ready to get back out there and travel like the good ol’ days. Truthfully though, neither scenario would really bother me. With Donna now working at UNIT and Fourteen sticking around I expect we’ll see them again, but at this point, I’m ready to watch Ncuti dazzle us for a bit. 

The epilogue with Donna’s family was such a nice and necessary scene. While Ncuti had since become the new Doctor, he wasn’t yet the current Doctor. We still needed to say goodbye to the Fourteenth Doctor. A good and proper goodbye. Earlier in the episode, Donna mentions to the Doctor that he never seems to rest, but here he seems at peace. It’s funny how it took 15 years to explore how the Tenth Doctor could have been “so much more,” but here it is. The real reason he came back was to retire, to have a family, to find peace. It’s as though every regeneration still swimming around in the Doctor’s mind is finally able to relax. We do however get a hint that it’s not all sunny days and lemonade. If you read Rose Noble’s Magic Card, it mentions she is ready for adventures in her own right. Seeing as she is known to have the occasional trip to Mars with Uncle Doctor, I suspect we’ll see her in the TARDIS sometime if not Big Finish. 

Back in his own fully accessible TARDIS, the Fifteenth Doctor is finally the current Doctor. He runs around his TARDIS consoles flipping switches and having the time of his life, ready to get out there and show the universe what he can do. And what a joy it is to see, is it not? I had been very nervous about this episode because I was worried about where Doctor Who would end up in the end. So much had changed during the Chibnall era and not all of it was for the better. The future of the show felt very shaky and uncertain. Ultimately I was hoping the show could once again find some sort of equilibrium and I feel it has. Doctor Who feels like it’s finally at a point where it can comfortably move forward. I can’t think of anything better to say now than “Allons y!”

[scotianostra]

On June 23rd 1927 the singer Kenneth McKellar was born.

One of the most accomplished classical tenors of his generation, Kenneth McKellar was born in Paisley, the son of a grocer his earliest musical experiences came from the family gramophone, but he was also taken toconcerts at St Andrew’s Halls, Glasgow.

Kenneth was soon entertaining family friends by impersonating his favourite singers. But his greatest pleasure in his early years was exploring the Scottish Highlands. The depletion of Scotland’s forest reserves during the World War II left him with a burning desire to help restore them, and after leaving the John Neilson school, Paisley,

Despite a keen interest in music, McKellar initially studied forestry at Aberdeen University. He also joined the university choir, where his vocal talent was apparent, and he received individual coaching from the university’s director of music. While still a student, McKellar made his first broadcast, from the BBC studios in Glasgow, after gaining his degree he joined the Scottish Forestry Commission. Over the next two years he took part in a research and survey programme on the woodlands travelling by horseback up and down the Scottish countryside.

After two years as a forester, McKellar decided to switch careers and take up a scholarship at the Royal College of Music in London. While still a student, he made a private recording in a booth at the HMV record shop in Oxford Street singing Roger Quilter’s O Mistress Mine and a few Scottish ballads. HMV sent the recording to Parlophone, which immediately gave him a recording contract. He recorded eight sides of songs and ballads on 78 rpm’s.

These records helped him to get a job in the chorus of the Carl Rosa opera company after graduation. There, he was given an opportunity to sing the opening aria from Rossini’s Barber of Seville so well that he was promoted to principal tenor.

After two years of touring, McKellar decided that a career in opera was “like living in a goldfish bowl, and I thought, I don’t need this. All I want to do is sing.” A few months after leaving, he signed a new recording contract with Decca, for whom he went on to make more than 30 LPs between the mid-1950s and the early 80s. These encompassed a huge range, from mainstream classical and religious songs through excerpts from Broadway musicals to the Scottish popular tradition of Robert Burns, Harry Lauder and well-known folk pieces.

With his 1960 album, Songs of Robert Burns, McKellar was among the first contemporary singers to revisit the poet’s whole body of work. He also recorded and performed more recent songs by Scottish composers, notably The Song of the Clyde by RY Bell and Ian Gourlay. If you have watched the 60’s film Billy Liar you will have heard Kenneth belting out Song of the Clyde at the start of the film! Another fact on this song is it was the very first record played on Scotland’s first commercial radio station on 31st December 1973.

McKellar occasionally wrote songs too, including the comic piece The Midges and the patriotic The Tartan, he was not averse to participating in the “tartanry” side of Scottish culture, which emphasised the more kitsch elements of national song, dance, dress and cuisine. With Jimmy Shand and his band plus the hosts Andy Stewart and Moira Anderson, he is indelibly associated with the White Heather Club, the BBC TV show that saw in the New Year in the late 1950s and 60s.

McKellar supported a number of charities, was an honorary president of Burns societies around the world and was a trustee of the Scottish International Education Trust.

As we await the crucial game tonight against Hungary it is only fitting I post this song......

[buttherainbowhasabeard]

Unpopular Opinion: David Tennant Should Never Have Returned To Doctor Who

When a teary eyed David Tennant as The Doctor uttered the words “I don’t want to go” in his 2010 generation scene, it was a heartbreaking moment for fans. Saying goodbye to such a universally loved incarnation would be hard, but this was Doctor Who. Change was inevitable, and often, exciting.

So when the BBC announced that Tennant would be returning to the iconic role 15 years on, as part of a series of 60th anniversary specials, I was sceptical. 

It looked like I was the only one though, as the internet erupted with anticipation and jubilation. I, however, thought the 14th Doctor reveal was a huge distraction that disrespected both the outgoing and the incoming actors.

Don’t get me wrong, Tennant is one of my favourite modern Doctor’s. His mid 2000s run as the 10th Doctor was funny, frightening, heartfelt and unforgettable. He had some of the best companions and villains, and some of the smartest and most compelling stories. But all good things come to an end, and now his emotional first exit felt a bit hollow. 

His return really took the shine off Jodie Whittaker’s finale. Yes, her years as the 13th Doctor were responsible for some of the worst Doctor Who storylines in recent memory. But this was hardly her fault, and instead of enjoying her last moments as The Doctor and reflecting on the good bits (the first female Doctor in the show’s history), fans were shouting at their screens for her to hurry up and regenerate so their favourite could return. It was almost like the show was doing a reset and hoping we’d forget about her.

It also meant that the now 15th Doctor (Ncuti Gawta, the first gay, black Doctor in the show’s history) had to wait a little longer to make his debut, which seemed on-the-nose too. 

The BBC were making it crystal clear who they thought their most popular Doctor was. Tennant has had more screen time than any other modern era Doctor, and now he’s the only one still alive and kicking post regeneration across all eras. Haven’t they ever heard of 'jumping the shark' or having too much of a good thing?!

He had four consecutive seasons from 2005-2008, with a fake regeneration at the end of Series 4 that saw him get cloned and live happily ever after with Rose Tyler on parallel earth. From 2008-2010 he travelled sans companion in a series of specials, before reluctantly regenerating into Matt Smith. In 2013, he made an appearance alongside Smith in the 50th anniversary special.

And now in 2023, he’s done three extra episodes alongside Catherine Tate reprising her role as his much loved Series 4 companion Donna Noble. These specials ended with him bi-generating (one Tennant Doctor, one Gatwa Doctor - don’t ask!) and continuing on as The Doctor, complete with his own TARDIS. He will, he says, stay put on earth to let Gatwa go off and have his own adventures. How generous of him! 

Firstly, Tennant’s latest run didn’t feel like a 60th anniversary either. Instead it felt like a very late follow up and conclusion (or even an alternative ending) to Series 4, so the opportunity to include other cameos and celebrate the show’s rich history was lost.

In ‘The Star Beast’, the monstrous Meep really just provided a reason for The Doctor to see Donna again. In ‘Wild Blue Yonder’, The Doctor and Donna fought creepy doppelgängers of themselves (again, talk about self-indulgent!), and in ‘The Giggle’, Neil Patrick Harris’ promising Celestial Toymaker did little more than put on a funny accent and do a funny dance.

Sure, it had some fun and heartfelt moments. I'm glad the DoctorDonna Human-Time Lord metacrisis has been resolved. The Doctor's tender moments with Donna were nice. His two redheaded companions (Donna and Mel) holding his hands as he "regenerated" was touching. Even Tennant and Gatwa's interactions were surprisingly sweet. However, the whole jaunt just felt like an excuse to reunite Tennant and Tate and capitalise on their lingering popularity. Which leads me to my second point… 

No other actor has been able to continue on as The Doctor, so the fact that this is the first exception to the rule shows that the studio is very obviously playing favourites. They are keeping Tennant’s sprightly sneaker wearing, pin stripe suited spaceman up their sleeves to roll out whenever they please. If the ratings plummet, they can bring Tennant back. If the fans want it, they can bring Tennant back. If Tennant wants it, they can bring Tennant back. Does anyone else smell a spin-off?

Thirdly, I don’t buy the idea that The Doctor can be - and wants to be - domesticated at all. Despite everyone telling him that he needs to stop and slow down, he has never once done so. In every incarnation, he/she is an energetic, chaotic and forever on-the-go entity that can’t stand waiting or having to sit idly by.

So, all of a sudden we're expected to believe that he’s going to stay with Donna and her family and just hang out on earth like a regular human? I doubt it. He even said it himself to Rose in Season 2, when trying to justify why he can’t settle down. "You can spend the rest of your life with me. But I can't spend the rest of mine with you." If bi-generation had have happened to Peter Capaldi’s 12th Doctor, I might have accepted it better because he said he wanted to rest. It would’ve made more sense there.

And lastly, but probably most importantly, everyone loves a bit of nostalgia, but bringing beloved characters back from the dead to get ratings up again isn’t a good enough reason. In reality, it just reeks of lazy writing or a lack of creativity, and in turn, a lack of closure. The whole point and poignancy of a show like Doctor Who is that The Doctor must change and move on, as we, the audience, have to move on.

When someone plays The Doctor, they do it for a limited time but they leave a lasting legacy. Having Tennant on standby undermines that. I want the writers to invest in their new actors and have faith in their new adventures instead of having earlier models waiting in the wings.

So for me, the best thing about these three specials and the finale wasn’t that Tennant didn't have to say goodbye this time. It was that Gatwa finally got to say hello...

[kierrasreads]

A Study in Scarlet (Sherlock Holmes #1) by Arthur Conan Doyle Review

Plot

Our first meeting with Sherlock Holmes. And John Watson's too! The young doctor is astonished by Holmes' many idiosyncrasies, including his talents on the violin.

But it's not long before Sherlock Holmes, with Watson in tow, is working with Scotland Yard investigating the murder of two Americans whose deaths have some mysterious connection to sinister groups gathering power in both Britain and America.

Here's where it all began, 'A Study in Scarlet.' Meet Sherlock Holmes, one of the world's leading consulting detectives - fictional of course!

Discussion

We meet again, Mr. Holmes! Like many fans of this iconic detective, my first introduction to him was through the BBC adaptation of the series, starring Benedict Cumberbatch. I was obsessed with this show! Then, my interests shifted and I left this British character in the past. My interest in the series got ignited again fairly recently. One day after work, I was browsing the Roku channel and saw that the platform had many Sherlock Holmes films from 1939, with Basil Rathbone portraying Sherlock Holmes and Nigel Bruce portraying Dr. John Watson (I believe all 14 films from this series are available on Roku). Anyway, the point is that I decided to read the Sherlock Holmes novels again and stick to them this time. This first Sherlock Holmes story totally captured my interest. The first part of this novel (Dr. Watson's reminiscences) proved to be fairly interesting and I was surprised at how fast Sherlock Holmes was able to solve the case.

The second part of the book focused on Jefferson Hope's past and took place in Utah (I'm sure some of you can see where this is going). I was utterly shocked at the portrayal of the Mormons, especially Brigham Young. I'll admit, I know next to nothing about Mormonism, its history, etc., but the whole second part of the novel read as..well..anti-Mormon. I couldn't help but wonder if Doyle had a grudge against the religion/group in general, or used this as an opportunity to let his grievances be known, but let's just say that I was relieved when Jefferson Hope finished his story and the focus shifted to the trail/conclusion. I'll have to research to see why he chose this particular lighting to portray the Mormons (of course, I realize that every story with revenge and murder must have a villain, otherwise it would be a completely different type of novel).

That's all I have to say about that! It was a good, brief read that got me back into the Sherlock Holmes fandom.

Rating

5/5

[topsyturvy-turtely]

Fluffbruary with turtely

(missed days edition)

Day 20

[day 19] [day 21]

prompts: will be listed at the A/N at the end (to not spoil my own story)

fandom: BBC Sherlock

will be uploaded to "That Stuff Called Fluff" on Ao3!

♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡

John was (almost) certain Sherlock wouldn't figure it out. Not because he wasn't smart enough (of course he was - it was hardly an unsolvable riddle), but because he wouldn't pay enough attention to it. So when John started with his little game at the first evening (he would give his hints only at evenings - to get some routine into it, to distinguish between his hints and his every day utterances), it was something unsuspicious, something Sherlock should be used to by now.

"You are fantastic", he said on Monday (at Scotland Yard, after his flatmate had deduced the murderer's motive in less than ten minutes). But still Sherlock gave him a side glance (which was slightly unbelieving) and started smiling (just a bit) when he saw John's big honest eyes.

Tuesday evening (when they sat across each other in their armchairs) John blurted, "You know, when you solved Greg's cold case the other day. That- you are..." John cleared his throat (awkwardly). "...amazing. Is all." Sherlock looked up, studied his face for a (-n intense) second and nodded. And then it (the intensity) was over.

John decided his hints needed to be more distinguished from his usual declarations (compliments). He wasn't sure why he had decided that: he was going to be sublte (but maybe he wanted to be busted?). This time (on Wednesday) he was not gonna say anything however. He grabbed a newspaper and a pen and circled four letters in the crossword puzzle. Ⓥariant, Ⓘllinois, Ⓟi. Then (hesitantly at first, determined at last) ⓊFO. He placed the newspaper beside him. He noticed Sherlock standing next to him at some point (tea mug in his hand) scanning the newspaper (for just a few seconds too long) then catching John's eyes. The doctor raised his eyebrows innocently. (He was being obvious wasn't he?) And they never exchanged a word about it.

When Sherlock wanted to leave their flat late Thursday afternoon to get cigarette patches (John had refused to get them for him), he was only wearing a dressing gown. John looked at him, mouth wide open. "Are you going like this?"

"I don't see why not.", the detective (manchild) replied.

"You truly are one-of-a-kind." (Fine, it might have been a compliment packed in an insult but John needed to be more subtle). Sherlock said, "You should know that by now.", and left (in dressing gown and dress shoes).

Friday night they walked home side by side (from a dinner, that would probably count as a date if they would want that), arms brushing (not so) accidentally. Sherlock looked up to the sky, at all those stars above them. "It's ravishing, isn't it?", he asked. And John stared at him with disbelief (love) in his eyes. Then he took the opportunity and whispered so quitely Sherlock (almost) couldn't hear, "So are you."

On Saturday they solved a case together (Anderson had sarcastically called them 'dream team'). And when they got home, already fallen into their respective armchairs, suddenly Sherlock started laughing loudly (unapologetically). And John (couldn't help but) join(ed). Getting more and more giggly every time Sherlock laughed (snorted with laughter). "You are intoxicating", John said when they have calmed down a bit. And together they exploded into another laughing fit.

On Sunday Sherlock had cooked something for them (it wasn't all that great, to be honest). And John (teasingly) grinned at him. "You are such a talented cook, Sherlock." And his flatmate grinned right back at him.

They ate their dinner together - in (comfortable) silence. Well, John tried to, Sherlock busied himself sorting his food ingredients next to each other by their colors and sizes. Then he dropped his fork suddenly (making a loud noise). "I figured it out."

John just raised his eyebrows at Sherlock. "What exactly are you talking about?"

"Your... your game. Your riddle. Whatever you wanna call it."

John (didn't know what to say or do so he just) continued looking at Sherlock.

"You were spelling a word. Each evening a new compliment, each somehow describing... personality traits."

John still didn't say anything so the genius continued, "Fantastic, amazing, VIP, one-of-a-kind, ravishing, intoxicating, talented. You were spelling favorite to me. Packed in a riddle."

John smiled at him. "Nice deduction, Sherlock."

Sherlock waved away his (additional) compliment. "Favorite... favorite... favorite WHAT, John?"

"Your genius brain hasn't figured it out yet?", John countered. "A four words sentence. The most important one was the riddle itself. Two were included in every presentation of a hint. Fourth needs to be filled by conclusion."

Knitted eyebrows soothed. "You are..."

John nodded. "The two words provided in the hints..."

Sherlock's eyes widened, "My... favorite?", he asked incredulously. "I am your favorite?"

"You are my favorite.", John nodded, a soft, loving smile on his face. He crossed a boundary he had never dared to cross before and reached his hand out to take Sherlock's in his.

"That- that's...", Sherlock rarely fought for words but John had an effect on him, that made him discover new things about himself every day. He glared at their hands, seemingly decided to focus on words instead, and whipped his gaze up, "What was the E gonna stand for?"

John looked at the floor, before he took a deep breath and stared directly into Sherlock's eyes. "Evermore. You are my favorite for evermore, Sherlock." He squeezed his hand three times (which means 'I love you') and Sherlock forgot how to speak, but squeezed John's hand three times back, because he knew it means 'I love you' and he did (undeniably) love John, too.

♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡♥︎♡

A/N: prompts: favourite | reveal | lounge by @fluffbruary <3

YES to feedback! 💚🐢💚🐢

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[retourne-toi-eurydice]

Ghost Death Theory Time!

I have basically no proof for any of this, it’s just for fun and I’m sure there’s going to be a line or detail I’ve missed as most of my Ghosts knowledge comes from Tumblr because I’m English and episodes are hard to find here.

Note: Trying to work out the cause of death for any of the ghosts (in either series) is difficult because by nature of being family-friendly(ish) shows they can’t go overboard on the body horror and also whatever makeup they do has to be cheap and efficient enough to do every day exactly the same, particularly for our main cast. So it’s not surprising that most of these theories centre on the idea of internal injuries. All that being said, I believe Hetty and Sass are the only true mysteries left so let’s get into it!

~Hetty~

Pushed: Much like her BBC counterpart I think it’s possible Hetty was murdered by someone she knew. However, if she were pushed out of a window like Lady Button I don’t see why they wouldn’t also carry over the joke about noisily reenacting her death every day. For some reason, my brain latched onto the idea that she was pushed out of a moving carriage. There was just something about everyone’s reactions when she got exorcised out of the car, I don’t know. For many reasons (clothes and hair in perfect order, no broken bones, it wouldn’t really make sense) I don’t think this is it. But I like it so it’s on the list.

Hoity toitied to death: Maybe something stressed her out so much, something was so contemptuous, someone so impertinent, that she had an aneurysm. Obviously, if she had had a stroke or something they couldn’t keep giving half her face muscle relaxant for shooting (yeah I don’t like that image either), so it would make sense if they were choosing to exercise creative license and have all the damage be out of sight. All that cocaine she took in life probably wouldn’t have helped, either. Speaking of…

Drug overdose: I think this is a popular theory but not one I particularly like because that would bring our count of drug-induced deaths up to three, and given that a house full of dead people is the perfect opportunity to get creative why wouldn’t the writers take it? However, I do think that their mutual love of drugs has probably been the topic of a pillow talk or two between her and Trevor- and who knows, maybe dying from the same thing is one of the reasons they bonded in the first place?

There isn’t really any one cause of death I’d bet on with Hetty, although the fact that we got the beheading, lightning strike, and mass disease deaths carried over from the original show makes me think a Grey Lady-style end is a very real possibility.

~Sass~

It is possible that Sass has a fatal injury somewhere under all his layers, though I’m not sure what the most prominent offensive weapons were in his lifetime so I can’t say how likely that is. I’m not sure whether that would be something he’d have disclosed by now either, albeit everyone else who died by another’s hand doesn’t half go on about it. Two things we do know about him are that he is very defensive and hates being embarrassed, so this leads me to think that perhaps his life was cut short by something comparatively pedestrian (and dare I say Isaac-like?). How about these:

Foodie misadventure: This tracks, right? He saw an unfamiliar berry or type of plant during his travels, it looked/smelt good, he ate it without due diligence and died either immediately or a short while after. Explains no physical indications for his death, his love of food, and why he might not want to advertise that he got taken out by a berry he should have known better not to eat. My money’s on this one.

Illness: Boring, but effective. He got sick with something only antibiotics could cure and he died young and unfulfilled *sad face*.

The elements: To be honest if one of the ghosts had frozen to death I like to think they'd be our Mary equivalent but with icicles clinging to them instead of smoke. That would be cool. I don’t have a lot to say about this one but it’s a possibility so it’s on the list.

I think that’s pretty much it for Sass theories- unless he’s got a stab wound hidden somewhere I do think that given his lifestyle and times he died of literal natural causes.

So what do you think, anything you agree with/disagree with? I honestly loved considering all these theories and I’m dying to hear everyone else’s ideas!

[deelaundry]

May Prompts #5 - Awkward

Continuing to update The Private Personal Blog of Dr. John H. Watson; this is Chapter 27 in the fic. For those who haven't read the prior chapters, Sherlock and John have a committed QPR. Claire is John's Sherlock-approved sex partner. Her background is pretty much the same as Mary's from the BBC show, although she never went rogue. She's on a six month sabbatical between assignments.

She's also aromantic, so nothing is happening with her and John on that front.

---

John had trotted down the stairs and was about to go out to his shift at Bart’s when the doorbell rang. A bit of frustration at the delay was pushed aside entirely when he saw Claire standing there; she looked as fit as ever.

“Hi, great to see you,” he said. “Sorry, I’m just about to go out; why were you stopping by?”

“Sherlock didn't tell you?” Claire tilted her head to the side, and smiled up at him. “Well, this is awkward.”

Sherlock suddenly appeared in the foyer, pulling his gloves on, and slipped past John to join Mary on the sidewalk. “Let’s go,” he said to her.

“Hang on,” John said at a slightly louder decibel level than was, strictly speaking, required. “What are the two of you doing?”

“Working, obviously,” Sherlock replied. “She’s better at this than you, actually.”

Claire sent a pleased, impish grin John’s way, but it didn’t mollify him one bit. Not one bit.

Sherlock continued, “So I texted her.”

“Claire’s better than me?” John couldn’t keep the emotion out of his voice, even though he wasn’t quite sure what the emotion was. As far as he could tell it was an odd melange of resentment, hurt, resignation, shame, jealousy, and a tiny smidgen of happiness that his partner was getting along with his… different kind of partner.

“Well, she is an on-leave super-[REDACTED] with a terrifying skill set. Of course she’s better.”

“Yeah, okay,” John replied. That at least made logical sense; the melange began to dissipate.

And, if nothing else, Sherlock’s words had put a sparkle in Claire’s eyes that was definitely alluring. Maybe by the time he got back from his shift, they’d both be in the lounge, flush with victory and high on adrenaline, and Sherlock would turn to his violin and Claire would turn to him…

“Nothing personal.”

He was startled out of his reverie. Sherlock was so close to him, hand on his wrist, and looking up at him, their heights reversed, and the look on Sherlock’s face… John took the opportunity to plant a kiss right on Sherlock’s forehead. “Have fun.”

“I always do.”

[thelostdreamsthings]

Today is June 4, the day of mourning for the CIA & capitalism. 1989 was the year when the USSR started to collapse. If only China could be swept under that wave, the globalists’ dream of world domination would come to fruition! Hence the Tiananmen Square protests!

Just like any Color Revolution, all the usual suspects were involved — George Soros, CIA, Western media propaganda, and some pro-US leadership within China. On the ground were mostly innocent students and workers, who had no idea what was happening. They wanted economic and political reforms but not Western-style democracy. They were mostly pro-Mao, pro-socialism, pro-police, pro-military etc. The police were unarmed -- didn't even have batons. Because nobody expected any trouble.

By the way, the gathering wouldn't even have happened. But fate would deal China a bad card. A famous reformer, Hu Yaobang -- Chairman & General Secretary of the CCP -- died on April 15, 1989. He was loved by young Chinese people, who then gathered at the Tiananmen Square to mourn his death. That was the perfect opportunity the USA was waiting for! Thus, on April 20, 1989 – five days after Yaobang’s death – James Lilley was appointed as the US Ambassador to China. He was a 30-year veteran from the CIA. But you can't start a revolution in a week. Since 1986, George Soros had already spent over $1 million cultivating a sizeable number of young radicals. Now, these useful idiots infiltrated the mourning crowd at the Tiananmen Square and transformed it into an American movement.

It took the Chinese government one month to realize that shenanigans were happening. For example, BBC and Voice of America (CIA outlet) were broadcasting all kinds of anti-communist propaganda from Taiwan and Hong Kong. So, a martial law was passed on May 20, asking the people to end the gathering. That's when the provocateurs started the violence. They kept escalating.

Armed with guns, Molotov cocktails etc., the saboteurs violently attacked and killed 100+ police and soldiers. Chinese police, at the time, had no crowd-control tools like tear gas. They didn't even have guns. Thus, the police got beaten up by the mobs. This is why Beijing had to send in military gear, whose sole purpose was to scare people. The military let the people destroy tanks, armored vehicles etc. If the communist party were so tyrannical, none of this would have happened.

Here is the crux of the matter: There was no "Tiananmen Square massacre"! All the Western Presstitutes who were later forced/bribed to lie had different narratives for a long time: Like, Miles from BBC, Kristof from the NY Times, and Roth from CBS News:

"I was one of the foreign journalists who witnessed the events that night. There was no massacre on Tiananmen Square" — BBC

"State television has even shown film of students marching peacefully away from the [Tiananmen] square shortly after dawn as proof that they [protesters] were not slaughtered” — NY Times

"The military came, negotiated with the students and made everyone (including himself) leave peacefully; and that nobody died in the square" — Reuters

"We saw no bodies, injured people, ambulances or medical personnel — in short, nothing to even suggest, let alone prove, that a “massacre” had occurred in Tiananmen Square" — CBS

And then the globalists who control all the Western media decided to rewrite the story to demonize China.

Did people die on the night of June 3? Yeah, absolutely. There was mayhem in parts of Beijing. Equal number of protesters & law enforcement died that night. Total deaths: 200-300. America's goal was a bloody massacre, which could be exploited for regime change in China. (Tiananmen Square on the morning of June 4)⬇️

When there was no bloodshed, the US invented a massacre. This is typical American atrocity propaganda. Crazy stories were made up: Like Chinese soldiers on top of buildings mowing down citizens with machine guns; or tanks deliberately crushing people in Tiananmen Square. Psychopaths of the United States of America. And all the young Chinese leaders (stooges) of the protests were able to escape China few days before June 4 and fly to the USA. This clandestine plan was called "Operation Yellowbird." Even the CIA operation had to have a racist overtone.

Like this crazy student leader -- Chai Ling -- who admitted in an interview: “I wanted to tell them [students] that we were expecting bloodshed, that it would take a massacre, which would spill blood like a river through Tiananmen Square, to awaken the people. But how could I tell them this? How could I tell them that their lives would have to be sacrificed in order to win?” She went to Princeton and Harvard... and even got nominated for Nobel prize!! of the American Empire.

But the United States of America is a big fukkking liar. Every Western narrative about China is a lie -- Tiananmen Square massacre, 60 million people killed by Mao's Great leap Forward, Uyghur genocide blah blah.. And there are so many sociopaths at all levels of the US establishment, they can't now figure out what's a woman or a man. The country has turned into the monster that it ascribed to its geopolitical competitors. This is the price you pay for imperialism and colonialism.

The famous "Tank Man" video was cut short by Western propagandists. Why? Because the man leaves unharmed. Doesn't quite fit the narrative of "brutal communist party." Also, it happened on June 4... AFTER the Tiananmen Square was evacuated and peace was restored.

Tiananmen Square “massacre” turned out to be a big flat lie.

[unitedbydevils]

Match Review: Aston Villa Women 1-2 Manchester United Women

The Womens Super League (WSL) season has finally begun, after a delayed start with a summer World Cup, but it got off to a flier for Mark Skinner's side with a scrappy win away at Aston Villa.

With a record WSL crowd for Villa Park of just over 12,500, the atmosphere was lively - and I did my part from the away end to help cheer on the Reds too.

United looked comfortable in possession in the first half but, like yesterday's men's game vs Palace, ultimately toothless. In contrast, Villa were a compact, disciplined unit. They moved well as a team and in a highly synchronised unison. This kept United out and allowed Villa - in particularly Rachel Daly - to threaten on the counter.

The second half saw more risk and energy from United as the rain fell on Birmingham, but the game took until the 74th minute to come to life. Ex-United winger Kirsty Hanson was sent off for a high foot, studs up challenge on Hayley Ladd, and United began to gamble.

This gave a sharper Villa a chance and England international Daly snapped it up, slotting past compatriot Mary Earps at her near post. United rallied and began to hold possession with much more assurance, and the hard work of Lucia Garcia paid off with a goal for the Spaniard just five minutes later.

Substitute Rachel Williams - no stranger to Birmingham having had two spells with the Blues - came on for the debutant Geyse da Silva Ferreira in the 66th minute and it was the veteran who clinched victory in stoppage time with a header in the 92nd minute. The nod wasn't that powerful and seemed to go past Van Domselaar in slow motion, and gave United a deserved three points to start the season.

Villa will feel hard done to given that they played a good game and showed excellent tactical discipline and coordination. Manager Carla Ward spoke to the BBC about the need for full time referees and assistants, rather than the current part-time system. Ward might have been alluding to some 'dark arts' mischief from United's star centre-back Maya Le Tissier (no relation) who body checked Ebony Salmon just outside the box and in front of the referee it appeared. Villa fans were outraged and demanding a red card, whilst United fans played the action down. The middle ground is that it was off-the-ball shithousery and deserved a yellow. It didn't stop a goal opportunity but it was unsporting and deliberate.

That said, Villa also had several occasions of play acting and feigning clips to the calves or ankles. Nothing as blatant as Maya's foul but food for thought.

We end though with Player of the Match Lucia Garcia. After running hard the whole 90 and getting a goal, she gave a rare interview to the BBC and whoops 😂

A United performance we can be proud of though. Up the reds.