#basically: i just have NO idea what to expect and that Stresses Me Out
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starbuck · 2 months ago
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keep stressing about the goats show tomorrow, but i just have to keep reminding myself that i already saw the best set of the tour (song-wise, anyway), so whatever they do tomorrow is just icing on the cake.
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gentlethorns · 2 years ago
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fuck dude i have got to find a job where i can be self-employed and creative. i cannot be in fucking retail hell anymore
#she bork#tbd#like now i don't deal w customers which is cool but now that i work at like a big retail store and not a little mall outlet the pressure is#insane. and i have bosses who never say good job or thank you and who have set me up to fail by throwing a department on me that i was not#hired to run or trained for and frankly don't have time to run properly either. so every week just starts w me in our weekly meeting being a#fucking piñata like 'why didn't you get this done đŸ€š you need to manage your time better đŸ€š you're losing sales đŸ€š' and i'm like i'm trying!!!!#what more can i do!!!!!! and then the side of it i actually kind of enjoy (which is what i was originally hired to do) is very very hard on#my body bc it's a very physical job (i run the team that unloads the trucks every day and like i'm usually helping unload bc i'm not just#gonna stand there and watch while my team busts their asses lol) and now i'm finding out that it's actually not normal to wake up every day#w your joints screaming and stiff and that i might have a chronic condition (doctor is thinking some sort of chronic inflammatory arthritis#but i won't know if my imaging and blood tests showed anything until like mid-june) and i'm like. so even the part of my job that i don't#mind as much is not good bc it's like actively destroying my body. okay sick đŸ€  and i don't wanna quit bc i've only been there for like#eight months and this job would be really valuable on a resume but i don't want it to look like i'm a job hopper or like i'm fickle or#unreliable. so i'm stuck here for a while i think. but the pressure is destroying me mentally and i know i need to find a position somewhere#else that is 1. not fucking goddamn retail bc retail will always be hell and 2. not management bc i don't see myself ever really getting#into upper management but lower/middle management gets shit on the most so if i go somewhere else and end up in middle management i'll be#right back to wanting to kill myself in a matter of months. basically i'm tired of expectations and pressure and stress and i'm tired of#waking up at fucking 2:30 every morning just to go in and get shit on and destroy my body all over something that in the end i do not fuckin#care about. i need to make art and be held accountable by only myself. idk i've been toying w the idea of learning how to tattoo and trying#to start establishing some artistic skill so maybe eventually i can do that? not now bc the economy sucks and that's scary lol and anyway i#have to give myself some time to actually learn the skill and perfect a style. but it makes decent money (at least before the expense of#supplies and taxes) and allows you to travel and still work and also it would be fun. and i could tattoo myself so it would cut some#expenses for me since i cannot stay away from the damn needle. idk lol i need to save some money before i buy a tattoo gun or anything but#i'm considering it bc i am going fucking crazy rn and ik this feeling will leave me eventually but i also know it will come back bc it#always does. and i'm tired of just surviving and just making it through every day and every week like i want to be happy and this is just#not doing it for me anymore#ugh fuck why couldn't i have been born w a brain that likes numbers and code and technology. i love being an artist but it makes finding a#sustainable career really difficult bc i feel so restless and miserable when i'm stuck in a passionless job but my passions are not#particularly profitable. hate it here why wasn't i born a capybara no job no responsibility just squint and squeak and sun
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opens-up-4-nobody · 2 years ago
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#looking at the notes ppl in the lab let me on my birthday card. it seems ppl think i should chill the fuck out lmao#a lot were like RELAX!!! and ya kno objectively theyre right but i refuse to listen bc theres something wrong in my head#sigh. i survived the day at least. the timed measurements r done on this experiment. thank christ. and my birthday gathering as so#i dont kno. it was kinda funny and kinda sad i guess. bc i knew it was gonna happen and i didnt want it to but i was like fine. ill meet#at 4. and i expected it to b in the conference room but they set up outside the lab around the corner. so they did kinda surprise me#location wise i guess. i cant imagine what expression i was making. it felt like a pained smile but idk. i had to go back to take#measurements every 4min so i was standing there with a plate full of ice creame cake. kinda away from everyone while they talked. staring#at my phone timer as it ticked down and abruptly leaving when i had to log a measurement. i was basically a non entity while there. which#was kinda idea bc i have too much hurt inside to talk to ppl right now. as evidence by my phone call with my parents when i got home. im#just kinda a bummer to exist around rn. idk maybe i should apologize to my boss bc i kno im not an easy person to do things for#and i really do appreciate the effort. its just hard when i kno how much stress its going to cause me for someone to attempt to do#something they think will b nice. so idk i just feel bad. but its over. and idk what ill do tomorrow. i should do stuff for when i move#like my dad was like: u should prioritize ur future stuff. and hes objectively right. they think i should get a studio apartment which#would b expensive as fuck but i will destroy myself if i have roommates. idk. theres lots still to do bc i have to get a ton of data#processed by the end of the week bc i have 8 days of measurement on another project that needs to get done by may 14th when i leave for#vacation. which my mom was like did u buy ur tickets for next month and i was like. hm how do i ask where im supposed to buy tickets to#without giving away that i dont kno what ur talking abt? bc apparently im going to a wedding? wtf do i wear to a wedding?#idk. i guess im just kinda sad bc this month has been really hard. i made it hard for no reason bc theres something wrong in my head and#that hurt has nowhere to go bc i cant even give anyone an honest account of how awful it was bc its like what r they gonna do abt it?#anything i say is just worrying bc i cant seem to stop myself who whats the point in talking abt it. but idk humans r social creatures so#when im in pain at least part of me wants someone to brush my hair and acknowledge my pain and tell me itll b ok#but idk. the idea of that happening is different from the reality where i seem to opperate at a different frequency to other people. we#just dont seem to properly connect. idk. idk what ill do tomorrow. im afraid to loosen my grip on my schedule bc i might fall to piece#pieces without the pressure. well see. lets home my 26th year is better than my 25th was. bc last year sucked#hope* lets hope that was my low point. bc that was not a fun time and im worry to take account of thr damage done#unrelated
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starryhyuck · 10 months ago
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pairing: prideandprejudice!jeno x afab!reader
words: 17.8k+
summary: lee jeno is the furthest idea of a possible suitor in your mind. yet somehow, fate continues to pair you together.
genre: fluff, angst, smut
warnings: loss of virginity, cunnilingus, penetrative sex, creampie, slight breeding kink
this is basically pride & prejudice (2005)
“You are behaving foolishly,” you comment as Minji runs around the room, encouraging your headache to grow. Jimin exhales from her spot next to you, hands folded in her lap like one of those formal ladies you used to make fun of when you were younger.
“Minji, please sit,” Jimin sighs exasperatedly. Minjeong giggles from her position on the opposite couch, slouching even though she’s not meant to look so unseemly.
Minji finally takes her seat and rolls her eyes at Jimin. “Sister, you must feel some ounce of joy. It’s our first time at a ball!”
It was true — your family had been all but shunned from any formal engagements due to your lack of wealth, but lately, your father has climbed up the ranks and gotten respect from some of the rich parties across town. His hard work resulted in you and your sisters being invited to your first ball, an elite event made up of high society members.
Your mother took this as a sign of a wedding on the horizon since none of your sisters have received formal proposals yet despite being of age. Minji is overjoyed, Jimin is stressing out, and Minjeong is displeased with the situation at hand. Minjeong has always been proud of your family, regardless of status, and she hates the social climbers that migrated around these parties.
You’re indifferent to tonight’s events, willing to tag along to whatever boisterous adventures you find.
Your mother comes frantically into the room just as Minji has finally calmed herself down, hair tied messily on top of her head and corset barely laced up.
“Girls, we must leave soon!” She declares, stroking her fingers through Minjeong’s hair to perfect it.
“Mother, you look unkempt,” Jimin scolds, standing from her spot to finish lacing up your mother’s corset and taming her unruly hair. Your mother profusely apologizes before shooing her away.
“This night is not about me. It’s about you girls. Now remember, Mr. Lee and Mr. Na will both be in attendance. They come from very affluent families, and it would be in your best interest to invest your time into them as they are the most desired bachelors of the season.”
Minjeong scoffs. “Mother, I highly doubt entertaining these men who deny our self-worth is in our best interest.”
Your mother’s mouth opens to scold Minjeong until the click of your father’s shoes come padding down the hall. In his old age, your father traditionally expects all of you to be married off before he passes. Otherwise, the estate transfers over to your cousin, Nakamoto Yuta, who has always been less than kind to your family. You know he would wed you and your sisters off to the first men he comes across just to keep your family’s earnings for himself.
“Are we ready to depart?” Your father asks, smiling proudly in his formal wear. All of your sisters rise from their seats, with Minji nearly jumping out of hers and Minjeong being heavily prodded by your mother.
It’s a long ride to the ball with your family’s estate being located further away from higher society. You and Minji play games on the journey as Minjeong sleeps and Jimin frets over what to say when you arrive.
Jimin has always been the more responsible one out of your sisters, and you understand she has a heavier burden on her shoulders to be married first. Luckily with you being one year younger, there wasn’t as much of an expectation for you to be wed so fast.
The arrival of your family is greeted with a hesitant welcome, most of the men smiling at your father and the women analyzing your sisters and your mother. You grip Minjeong’s arm for dear life, feeling a little more hesitant about the experience now that you have stepped foot on the grounds.
“This is absurd,” Minjeong whispers in your ear as you enter the expansive ballroom. People are gathered in some of their most formal outerwear with music echoing around the dance floor.
“Would you not enjoy a dance?” You ask your sister, heels clacking against the wood floors as you scurry your way through the crowd. You imagine dancing would be quite nice — you and your siblings have spent nights practicing in your rooms, hands joining together as you pretend that you all are actually on the dance floor. Tonight would be perfect to bring those memories to life, but Minjeong doesn’t seem very fond of the idea.
“Have you forgotten that we are not allowed to dance with one another? We must find a partner,” she reminds you, and your eyes flutter around the room to see the prospects.
You’ve seen most of these men in passing, like Lee Taeyong or Lee Mark. You have heard that the brothers are kinder than their appearance might make them seem and perhaps they would entertain you with a spin on the floor.
You suddenly feel Minji grip your arm and she squeals in your ear. “There they are! Lee Jeno and Na Jaemin!”
Your eyes turn to the entrance, where the men of the night are starting to flock in. Lee Jeno, a known affluent man, owns one of the largest estates in the country and has been one of the most desired bachelors for years now. His friend, Na Jaemin, has just moved to the country, making this ball his first public appearance. Similar to Jeno, Jaemin owns multiple estates with an abundant fortune sitting in his bank.
In this world, they are a girl’s one way ticket to safety.
You see Jimin’s back straighten in anticipation, and you know she has her eyes set on Jaemin.
Your mother approaches your side, squeezing your arm. “Behave now, girls.”
Your family gathers to present yourselves in front of Jeno and Jaemin, bowing and curtsying in respect. Jeno simply appears bored, eyes scanning the room in an air of confidence and arrogance. Jaemin immediately smiles at Jimin, who grows slightly bashful under his gaze.
“Mr. Na, it’s a pleasure to meet you,” your father greets first, shaking Jaemin’s hand with fervor.
“You as well, sir. I’m taken by the people’s hospitality to my arrival,” Jaemin remarks.
“It’s rare we get a new face in this town,” your mother replies happily. “And such a handsome one at that.”
Jaemin’s smile is blinding, basking in the compliments and attention. Jeno, on the other hand, looks like he wants to leave and never return.
The music suddenly changes to the tempo of the traditional dance, and Jaemin asks Jimin to join him on the floor. Your sister shyly accepts and you hear both your mother and Minji squeal to one another. Minjeong rolls her eyes and informs you she’s going to find some refreshments for herself.
She leaves you with Jeno, who still appears stiff and unapproachable. You decide to take the first leap into conversation.
“Do you like to dance, Mr. Lee?”
He blinks once, scanning you before answering. “Not if I can help it.”
You’re deterred by his answer until Minji tugs you forward, nudging you to join her on the dance floor. You’re paired with Taeyong, who politely bows to you.
You feel a pair of eyes follow you while you maneuver around bodies of the elite, and your mind lingers on the disdainful presence of Lee Jeno.
Once the music subsides, you take another politeful curtsy to Taeyong before sweeping the room for your fellow companion, An Yujin. Yujin, like your family, was not born into wealth and struggles in society as you do. However, because of her charisma, she is able to sneak her way into parties by charming some of the men for an invitation. You spot her in between a few other guests and eagerly pull her away.
“You did not tell me you were coming!” She exclaims, wrapping you up in a hug.
“We were not informed until earlier this week,” you share, walking along with her as you move your way through the crowd. “Is it not so lovely?”
“Very,” she giggles, her voice turning down when you spot Jeno and Jaemin walking very close to you two. They do not catch sight of you, speaking quietly to one another.
“What a splendid night, so many lovely women,” Jaemin chuckles.
Jeno replies in a bored tone. “You were dancing with the only lovely woman in this room.”
“Yes, she was quite a keeper, was she not?” Jaemin hums, and you and Yujin exchange a look. “I saw you speaking to her sister. She was quite admirable as well.”
Jeno scoffs. “Admirable? Barely tolerable, I would say.”
The conversation is cut short when Jaemin’s sister sweeps them away to meet another family. You huff at Jeno’s clear dislike of you and Yujin pats your hand in comfort when they disappear into the crowd.
“What a horrid man,” you comment.
“Do not fret,” Yujin smiles. “If he liked you, you would actually have to speak with him.”
You giggle in agreement. “Yes, imagine having to entertain a man like that.”
“Jimin looks rather happy, though,” Yujin remarks fondly. “She’s thoroughly taken by Mr. Na.”
You gaze over at your sister, who is happily chattering with Minji. “It seems so. I hope mother is taking her bearings and not placing too much pressure upon her shoulders.”
“I think it might be too late for that.”
Your mother has suddenly grouped Minji and Jimin into directly speaking with Jaemin and Jeno. You exchange a look with Yujin before walking over to save your sisters from this debacle. When you step into their circle, you hear Jaemin compliment Jimin’s dancing.
“She is quite the dancer, if I must say.”
“Yes, yes!” Your mother shouts. “She and her sisters practice all the time. My handsome Jimin, you see, is definitely the most well-rounded of all my daughters!”
“Mother!” You scold, trying to stop her as she continues to embarrass your sisters.
However, she ignores your protest and Jimin’s visible contempt. “Jimin’s always had a vast amount of suitors, you know. There was this one bewitching gentleman who I thought would propose to her last spring but alas, all the man did was write a few poems.”
“And that ended it completely,” you cut in, and Jimin throws you a grateful look. “Who ever decided that poetry was a suitable medium to a woman’s heart? Very poor choice, might I say.”
Your statement earns you a few laughs until a haughty voice interrupts.
“So what do you propose?” Jeno retorts, and it’s the most engaged he’s been with you all night. His eyes bore into yours with the most intense observance. “Poetry has been the love language for suitors across all ages. What do you propose is better to take its place?”
You smile mischievously. “Dancing, I believe. Even if one’s partner is barely tolerable.”
Jeno’s face morphs into a mix of understanding and discomfort at your recall. You smirk, offering him another curtsy before vanishing back into the crowd.
You feel the burn of his stare follow you.
—
“Shopping for such a simple piece of clothing must seem so benign, do you not think so?”
“Yes, it quite certainly is,” you reply, tugging Minjeong into a nearby fabric store. “But it is necessary in order to impress the likes of the Na family for Jimin’s best interest.”
You and your sisters have made a trip into town to purchase new dresses for another upcoming ball planned by Jaemin. Since your first encounter with him, he and Jimin have made slow strides into courting one another, and this dance may be an opportunity to make it more official. Therefore, you have taken the role of stringing your family into the best shape to appease high society.
Jimin is already browsing through a variety of pinks and blues, carefully explaining to the seamstress that she has no desire for lavish embellishments to her dress. Although she would never admit her nerves, you can detect it from the way she frantically combs her fingers through her hair.
“Play nice for once,” you say to Minjeong, stroking her arm in consolation. “This could mean wonders for Jimin.”
“I can play nice,” Minjeong agrees hesitantly, pretending to be interested in some of the frilly ribbon decorating the store.
The bell above the door rings, signaling another customer walking in. You all turn to see a gentleman come inside, and you curtsy to greet him.
“My apologies for the intrusion,” he smiles, and you take note how captivating he appears. “It’s pouring out there and I was hoping to take shelter in here.”
“Of course, Mr. Lee,” the seamstress nods, gesturing for him to walk about as he pleases.
His eyes zero in on you. He takes your hand and presses a kiss to your knuckles. You bow your head coyly.
“Lee Donghyuck, it’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance. Are you ladies also shielding yourselves from the horrid rain?”
You smile and return your hand to your side.
“In contrast, Mr. Lee, we are prolifically finding ourselves a manner of dress for the Na ball,” you share, and his eyes sparkle at your response.
“Ah, I see. It must be an extremely difficult decision for you then.”
You laugh. “Yes, it’s quite the hunt for us.”
Minjeong suddenly reappears next to you. “And what brings you to town this evening, Mr. Lee?”
He offers a nod to your sister. “Some of the men from our militia district are in town for our homecoming. We have gathered into town to see what we all have dearly missed from our time away.”
His eyes flit over to you once more, and you bashfully glance down at your feet.
“I must come and see what beholds the community of this ball,” he states, hands wringing together behind his back. “It looks to be an event of importance.”
As soon as Jimin finds the right fabric for her dress and you review the designs for the rest of your family, Donghyuck offers to walk you all back to your estate. Luckily, the weather clears by the time you finish shopping.
You speak with Donghyuck on the way home, with Minji throwing the two of you suggestive looks as you break off from the others.
“How long are you in town for then?”
“Another fortnight or two, dependent on the weather,” he replies, his shoulder brushing against yours as you stride along.
“It must be pleasant to be back home. I cannot imagine how much you have missed it,” you say, enjoying the warmth of his figure every time his arm presses against yours.
He opens his mouth to respond before Minji’s loud hollers interrupt him.
“Oh, Mr. Na! Mr. Na!”
Minji calls out to Jaemin across the river, who is riding horseback alongside Jeno. Your eyes narrow at Jeno’s appearance, still feeling offended from his malicious comments against you. He, in turn, returns your heated glare but to your surprise, it’s not directed at you. His focus is solely on the man beside you, and you notice how Donghyuck tenses at his presence.
“Mr. Na, we just came from the dress shop to look fitting for your ball!” Minji calls happily.
Jaemin gives a nod, his eyes floating to Jimin.
“I’m happy to hear of it!” He replies.
The conversation is cut short when Jeno suddenly instructs his horse to trot away. You observe his abrupt exit, with Jaemin promising to see your family at the ball before following his friend.
“Very ill-mannered, that one is,” Donghyuck comments, scoffing as Jeno’s figure disappears further and further in the distance.
You begin the trek home again as Minjeong speeds up her pace and Jimin tugs Minji along to keep up. You fall behind in order to uncover the deeper meaning of Donghyuck’s words.
“You seem to have an uncivil assumption of Mr. Lee,” you note to him, and he hums in agreement.
“Mr. Lee and I do not get along well.”
“May I inquire why?”
“I have known Mr. Lee since birth, you see. Our families were very close and I thought of his father as mine and he thought mine as his. When my father passed, I became closer to his own as a result. Eventually, when Jeno’s father grew sickly, he asked that the rights of the Lee estate be passed onto me. At that point, you must imagine, we were closer than he and his son ever were and it drove Jeno wild with jealousy.”
You can visualize Jeno as the epitome of bitterness, envy blazing his form as he watches Donghyuck grow closer to his father. You fail to realize how your bias towards disliking Jeno prevents you from questioning the truthfulness to Donghyuck’s story.
He continues. “After his father passed, Jeno willingly sought my demise by forcing me into the militia and preventing me from inheriting his estate. I hope you can see now why I do not enjoy entertaining his presence.”
“That is purely vengeful,” you say with sympathy, almost wishing to apologize on Jeno’s behalf. “It pains me to think you had to go through such a thing.”
He smiles and shrugs it off.
“It is in the past, and we must look towards the future. I shall be delighted to see you at the ball, miss.”
You curtsy and grin. “You as well, Mr. Lee.”
—
Donghyuck is the first person you search for when you arrive at the Na estate.
You spot Yujin in between bodies, tugging her along in your search. She laughs and follows you as you weave your way through the crowd.
“How handsome is he that has you so besotten?”
“He’s just wonderful, Yujin!” You exclaim passionately. “If you spoke to him as well, you would know!”
You pass by numerous familiar faces, asking them if they have seen Donghyuck lingering around. You disappointingly receive a resounding denial at the sight of his presence.
Jimin calls your name quietly when she approaches you and Yujin in the drawing room.
“I do not believe Mr. Lee is here. It seems he has been sent off.”
You frown. “Sent off? Oh, but he must be here!”
“There you are.”
All three of you jump at the sound of a male voice entering your conversation. You turn to see your cousin, Yuta, staring at you intimidatingly. You curtsy in respect.
“I was wondering if it would please you to join me.”
He gestures to the dance floor and you almost choke.
“Mr. Nakamoto, I did not know you danced.”
If you did not know any better, you would guess Yuta was glaring at you judging by the weight of his stare.
“I do not think it so inappropriate for a gentleman of my status to ask a woman for a dance. As much as I think it is not inappropriate for you to accept.”
You flounder. Your sisters had gossiped a few days ago about Yuta being in search of a wife, but you would have never guessed he had his sights set on you.
You nod timidly, trying your best to ignore Yujin and Jimin’s incredulity. He guides you to the floor and you make your best attempt at taking him seriously.
The dance is almost comical to you, suddenly burdened by Yuta’s intense gaze. He has never shown the slightest interest towards you until now, and his advances only bring you laughter.
As soon as the music ends, you grab Yujin’s arm and pull her away to avoid Yuta’s further questioning. The two of you giggle at the spectacle that just took place.
“Can you believe Mr. Nakamoto just-“
Your voice catches in your throat when you almost collide into someone’s chest. Your eyes drift up to catch the sight of Jeno.
He still has that same bored expression painting his face but you can see a hint of nervousness clouding his eyes.
“May I have the next dance?”
You are slightly startled by the question, but you manage to keep your decorum intact.
“You may.”
He offers you a nod before disappearing into the crowd once more. Yujin squeezes your arm.
“Did you agree to dance with Mr. Lee?”
“For heaven’s sake, I believe I have. I must be going mad, Yujin. He is the man I have sworn to hate,” you gasp.
She shakes you from your trance and guides you back to the dance floor, bringing you face to face with Jeno. He is a lot more restless than usual, bouncing on the balls of his feet as he avoids your gaze.
The dance begins with a respectful curtsy and bow. You begin to move to meet Jeno at the center and remark, “This is a beautiful dance.”
He curtly nods. “Yes, I think so.”
He is rather lucky you’re determined to be on your best behavior or else you would have rolled his eyes at the simple comment. You turn past Kang Seulgi’s figure and meet him again in the middle.
“It is your turn to make conversation, Mr. Lee. Usually, you would compliment the host of the gathering or comment on the people who have attended.”
“Is that so?” He muses, taking slow steps around Lee Mark to circle back to you. You join your hands in the middle and pace quietly to the hum of the violin playing. “Please do tell what invigorating subject you would like for me to focus on.”
You can tell he’s trying to push your buttons and you grit your teeth. “A lady must not lead the conversation so easily, Mr. Lee. It is your job to set the tone.”
You separate to continue the dance, rotating again around Seulgi and Mark’s figures.
“Do you and your sisters go shopping in town often?”
You hesitate, knowing he’s beginning to broach the subject of Donghyuck. You connect in the middle, the bottom of your dress skirting by him.
“Lately yes, we have. We find it a great opportunity to get out and meet new people. In fact, we had just met a lovely man that day you saw us by the river.”
His lips press into a thin line. “Lee Donghyuck is charming, indeed. His ability to win over women’s hearts is quite notable, but it does not fare in comparison to his ability to quickly lose that adoration.”
You bite back, dancing in another circle and attempting to keep your composure. “Yes, and it was so devastating to hear that he has lost that devotion from you. Quite irreversible, is it?”
“Indeed,” he nearly hisses, stopping in the middle to sneer at you. The dance continues but you hold your ground, staring at him with as much anger as you can muster. “Why do you ask such a question?”
“To inquire into your character, Mr. Lee.”
His eyes burn with an unanticipated flame. “And what did you discover?”
“Very little. I hear quite different stories about your character and it baffles me exceptionally.”
“My apologies,” he states, eyebrows furrowed in frustration. “I hope to clear your troubled thoughts going forward.”
You both resume the dance, but it somehow feels like the entire room has disappeared. The weight of your words builds the tension and you follow the steps of the dance you know by heart, but your eyes no longer drift to different parts of the room. They stay focused on Jeno, who is equally captured by you.
The two of you speak nothing more until you return to the same spots you started the dance in. The sound of applause jolts you out of your stupor and you take one last look at Jeno, offering him a polite curtsy before exiting the floor.
You’re startled when you nearly run into Yuta again on your way to the drawing room.
He says your name in a rigid tone. “You’re well acquainted with Mr. Lee?”
You almost stutter. “Not very well. I will admit, I’m surprised to see you at such an event, Mr. Nakamoto.”
“Are you? Your mother has brought it up to me on many occasions, especially noting that you would be in attendance.”
You clench a fist behind your back and silently curse your mother.
“Did she? I cannot imagine why she would think that would be of importance to you.”
“I am sure you have heard of my search for a companion to my estate. Lady Park has been stressing the issue and I am not one to avoid her suggestions,” he shares, taking a small step closer to you.
You take a step back. You and your sisters know all about Lady Park — the woman who financially supports Yuta until he gets a hold of your family’s fortune when you and your siblings are married off and your father has passed. She dictates every aspect of Yuta’s life and he must engage in her wishes to ensure his funds are properly taken care of.
“Mr. Nakamoto, I will save you the trouble. I have no desire to be married at this time, so whatever offer my mother promised you cannot be fulfilled on my account.”
He frowns. “Surely, a girl of your age understands the need for a husband in this economy. A comfortable life could save you the misfortune of attending these dances.”
“If you do not mind my candor, I do not believe a comfortable life for me would include you in it. I sincerely hope you are able to find a wife who is best suited to help you run your estate.”
You curtsy for him, ignoring the malicious sneer he throws your way. You scurry into the drawing room, searching for Yujin and finding her near the piano. Minji is playing to her heart’s content and it seems she has been doing so for hours, and your father walks over to tell her to be mindful of other people’s time.
You loop your arm around Yujin’s to get her attention.
“Oh, how was it?” She exclaims enthusiastically as you pull her away. “You did not look so pleased to be in Mr. Lee’s presence from what I could see.”
You huff. “Truly an understatement. And you will not believe the kind of proposal Mr. Nakamoto approached me with.”
She raises an eyebrow. “Do not tell me-“
“I denied it, of course. It would have been a loveless coupling, much to my mother’s chagrin.”
She frowns at your indifference. “You know, you are blissfully lucky to even have such an offer come across you. Your family has only been in high society for a few months yet you have already gotten a marriage proposal from a wealthy suitor.”
“Is that all you heard? A wealthy suitor,” you repeat with a scoff. “Yujin, Mr. Nakamoto has despised my family since Jimin came of age. I would like to think I should get a say in who I marry and not just because he is inheriting my father’s pocket.”
You brush off her continued sorrow over your situation. Your eyes scan the room, seeing your mother hang by the staircase with a glass of wine in her hands, loudly praising Jimin for catching the attention of Jaemin. Jimin, on the other hand, is conversing quietly with him a few feet away, awkwardly tucking her hair behind her ears and avoiding his gaze. Minji is tugging Minjeong along now that she is not berating a crowd with her piano playing, the both of them laughing at some of the guests around them.
“I believe my family is entertaining the masses well enough,” you muse.
She laughs and nods, sweeping your previous conversation about Yuta under the rug.
“The upside is that Mr. Na does not seem to mind,” she says, and the two of you watch him laugh at something Jimin has whispered.
“I think he is quite devoted to her.”
She hums. “But does she return his favor?”
You chuckle. “What are you on about? Of course she does! He’s all she ever thinks about.”
“All I am saying is that having a wonderful man like Mr. Na becoming smitten is a rare chance. However, if Jimin does not outwardly express her intentions, he could be deterred from continuing his advances.”
You shake your head. “She’s just shy, you know that. She is not the type to wear her heart on her sleeve like most other women.”
“But Mr. Na is not well acquainted with that fact. He does not know her as we do. She has to take advantage of his love before the clock runs out.”
You study your sister and her suitor, wondering if Yujin was right.
Your eyes drift over to catch Jeno’s, who is intently watching you from across the room. His hands are folded behind his back and despite the many women surrounding him, he only has his gaze directed at you. You interpret it in the wrong fashion, assuming he has once again taken on a mission to taunt you.
You hold your head high, hauling Yujin to the next room and disregarding the irritating presence of Lee Jeno.
—
It is weeks later when your family catches news that Jaemin is leaving the city.
Jimin is utterly distraught, ostracizing herself in her room while your mother frantically runs around the house, insisting the news cannot be true. You hesitantly approach Jimin as she is crying on her bed, curled up with her face stuffed in her pillow. You brush back her hair and sigh.
“Mr. Na is an idiot for leaving without proposing to you,” you say, trying your best to comfort her. “All of us could see he was so taken with you. I am sure he will return soon and bring you with him.”
“Do not bother,” she sniffles, wiping the tears falling down her cheeks. “I knew I could never be an acceptable fit for him. He saw our family and ran for the hills.”
“Stop putting yourself below him,” you scold. “You were a very acceptable match for him and it is his fault if he could not see how uniquely extraordinary you are. He will learn his regret soon.”
You leave her to wallow in her sadness, telling your mother to stop her fussing and leave Jimin alone. You catch some fresh air outside, basking in the sunlight before you hear the crunch of leaves from behind you.
You barely register Yujin’s form until she’s tackling you in a hug. You gasp and lock your arms tight around her.
“What on earth are you doing here?” You laugh, and she gives you another squeeze before pulling away. You take in the anxiety clouding her face.
“I have come to tell you the joyful news — Mr. Nakamoto and I are engaged.”
You take a step back, astonished by the reveal. You blink rapidly and stutter. “E-Engaged? To be wed?”
“Of course, silly. What other kind of engaged is there?” She drinks in your nauseated expression and sighs. “Do not give me that. You should be perfectly happy for me.”
“But he is ridiculous! And so much older than you. Yujin, you cannot possibly-“
“Yes, I can,” she replies in a stern tone. “Not all of us can afford to have choices. He is offering me a comfortable life and a beautiful home. And now, your family will no longer have to worry that some tyrant will swoop in and steal your father’s earnings.”
“But Yujin-“
She continues. “My father is very close to losing his job and my family is in danger of falling from high society. I do not have many prospects, and I am very thankful that Mr. Nakamoto approached me. I am terribly frightened, do you not see? So please, do not judge me.”
You embrace her. “I apologize, I did not realize how tough it must have been for you.”
She shakily returns your affection. “Promise me you will come visit when you can? Lady Park has a wonderful cottage that we will be staying in when we are married.”
You nod. “I most certainly will. I have to ensure you are being taken care of properly.”
She giggles. “I will miss you.”
After a tearful goodbye, you watch Yujin’s figure disappear into the horizon and return home. You feel a plethora of emotions swirling around your head from Yujin’s future — mainly concern but also a feeling of happiness for her safety. As much as you were not fond of Yuta, you know he would still treat her with respect.
You are taken aback when you enter your home to see your mother with a handful of garments in her arms. She rushes up the stairs with Minji following closely behind. You fume when you see her entering Jimin’s room.
“Mother, I told you to leave Jimin well enough alone!”
You ascend the staircase and follow them, confused when you see a suitcase splayed out on Jimin’s bed as your mother stuffs clothing into it as fast as she can.
“Oh, there you are!” Your mother exclaims at the sight of you. “Come here and help Jimin pack for her trip. Where in heavens did you disappear to?”
Your eldest sister is now up on her feet, looking slightly more lively. Minji is eagerly folding dresses for her.
You speak slowly. “I was out speaking with Yujin. She is betrothed to Mr. Nakamoto.”
They all pause at the news. Your mother is the most engaged, furious by the revelation.
“I told you! Mr. Nakamoto is a reputable man who could have brought you wonderful children.” You wince at the thought. “You should have accepted his proposal when he offered!”
“Oh mother,” Jimin interjects, coming to your defense. “The man did not even have the decency to ask father for permission.”
“What exactly are we packing for?” You ask, desperate to move the topic of conversation far from you.
Your mother immediately brightens, forgetting about nagging you for a second. “Jimin is going out of the city to stay with your aunt and uncle! She will remain for a visit until Mr. Na sees the error of his ways.”
You frown, approaching them as they continue to pack Jimin’s belongings.
“Are you sure this is what you want?”
“Of course it’s what she wants!”
You and Jimin ignore your mother’s enthusiasm. She nods at you, smiling softly.
“I think so. No, no, I believe so. I want to fight for him.”
You smile at the sparkle of determination in your sister’s eye. You happily help her fold the rest of her belongings.
Your mother has already called the carriage, with Minjeong holding the door open with a disinterested look on her face. Jimin envelops her in a hug as she passes and you see Minjeong’s hardened expression melt a little.
You all help Jimin into the carriage and wave her off, praying to the heavens that Na Jaemin will offer her a second chance.
—
You breathe in the smell of the quaint countryside, laughing when Yujin comes bursting out the front door of her cottage and embraces you tightly.
“I cannot believe you are finally here! I have waited so long for your arrival,” she says.
“I am delighted the weather was favorable enough for the trip,” you murmur, pulling away and smiling softly. “This is a lovely home, Yujin.”
“Oh please, you flatter me so. You have not yet seen the inside!”
She pulls you through the door, and you drink in the sight of the living room. It feels warm and cozy, which is exactly what you would expect from a home decorated by your friend.
Yuta comes walking down the long hallway, eyeing you.
“I see you have made a successful trip here.”
You curtsy. “Yes, Mr. Nakamoto. I am honored that you and Yujin have allowed me to stay for a short period.”
“You know you can stay for as long as you like!” Yujin exclaims. “I have missed your company a great many.”
She guides you into the room where you will take your stay. She helps you unpack your luggage, admiring the new dresses you have acquired in her absence.
“And how is Jimin? I was curious to know of her whereabouts since the last letter of yours arrived.”
You sigh. “It has been months since she left to stay with our aunt and uncle. No progress has been made for her and Mr. Na, and I fear for her heartbreak when she returns to us.”
Yujin frowns. “How dreadful. I do hope she is able to win his affections before it is too late.”
“Whatever the case may be, Mr. Na has surely lost a beautiful bride.”
She hums in agreement.
Yuta interrupts your conversation hours later, rushing into your room with a delighted expression.
“Yujin! Lady Park has asked us to come to supper,” he declares.
Yujin stands from her spot on your bed, clapping her hands in excitement.
“Oh, wonderful! That is absolutely delightful.” She turns to you, gripping your elbows. “You must come with us. Lady Park would be overjoyed to meet you.”
“O-Oh,” you stutter, unsure of what to say. “I haven’t got much to wear.”
Yuta brushes off your concern. “Lady Park is not averse to your manner of dress. Simply put on your best and you can accompany us.”
You join Yujin and Yuta that evening to meet Lady Park at her grand estate, which is merely a few miles away from their cottage. You hold your breath as you enter the grand drawing room, where Lady Park sits with her daughter, Chaeyoung.
You curtsy in respect alongside Yujin, and Lady Park eyes you warily.
“We are honored you have asked us to dine with you tonight, Lady Park,” Yujin says, hands folded neatly above her stomach.
You are about to voice your agreement until a creak in the hardwood distracts you. Your eyes flutter over to the doorway to catch the sight of Jeno entering.
“Mr. Lee,” you murmur in surprise. “I did not expect to see you here.”
The familiar burn of his stare welcomes you. He bows his head and you return the favor.
He says your name, and you feel a rush travel down your spine. You have not heard him speak since the night of the dance.
“I am a guest here,” he explains simply.
Lady Park stands from her seat on the chaise lounge.
“You are familiar with my nephew?”
You digest the information, storing away the fact that Yuta never mentioned Jeno was related to Lady Park.
“Yes, I had the privilege of meeting your nephew a few months ago, ma’am.”
You hear Jeno almost scoff at the suggestion of your encounter being anything but dreadful. You clench your fists behind your back to prevent an outburst.
“And this is my cousin,” Jeno introduces, stepping aside to allow another man to come into your line of vision. He smiles and bows. “Park Jisung.”
You pay your courtesy and Lady Park instructs the group to gather in the dining room for supper. You take a spot next to Jisung and across from Yujin.
Before you can get comfortable, Lady Park scolds Yuta. “Mr. Nakamoto, you cannot sit next to your wife and only converse with her. Switch with our guest.”
You awkwardly switch places with Yuta, now sitting next to Yujin and Jeno. Your shoulder brushes by his, and he instinctively leans closer to you. Your breath hitches slightly at the proximity.
With the seating arrangements in order, you all take your seats and begin dining into the feast.
Jeno clears his throat. “Has your family been faring well?”
It takes a moment for you to register that he is speaking to you. You glance at him, only to find him engrossed in his meal.
“They have been doing well, all things considered,” you reply. You cannot help but prod him for answers. “Jimin has actually gone to stay with our aunt and uncle, close to where Mr. Na is staying. Perhaps you have seen her.”
He looks at you. “I have not had the pleasure, no.”
You purse your lips. “What a shame. I know she would be delighted to have your company.”
He hums. “Is that so? Is she the only one who would enjoy my companionship at this time?”
Your mouth hangs open in surprise at his confidence. A sliver of his true personality shows, with the corner of his lips threatening to lift.
Lady Park interrupts your exchange as she calls your name.
“Do you play the piano?”
You shake your head, trying to disregard that Lee Jeno’s character seems to be more than that of a boring nobleman. “Not very well, ma’am. I’m afraid that is a talent reserved for my youngest sister.”
“And your sisters — how many of you are out in society?”
You smile as politely as you can. “All of us, ma’am.”
Lady Park is shocked by the revelation. “All of you? All at once? The youngest being out before the oldest ones are married? Why, that is unheard of.”
“I should not think to burden my younger sisters simply because the oldest ones are not yet wed. They deserve to have their fair share of enjoyment,” you voice, ignoring her continued surprise by your candor.
“You have a lot of opinions for a girl so young and still not in charge of her own household,” Lady Park sighs. “It would do you well to hold your tongue.”
Your fingers tighten around your spoon but you’re amazed when Jeno speaks up.
“I think she is very gifted for her age, considering her family was not born in the faces of high society. I do not think playing the piano would truly showcase the talent she encompasses.”
Lady Park’s lips dissolve into a thin line at her nephew’s impudence. You swallow the jarring emotions you feel at Jeno’s blatant defense of you.
“Well, I must be carrying the customs of my time then. However, I shall hear you play a piece for us after supper.”
“Ma’am, I stress to you that I do not lie when I say I play the piano poorly-“
Yuta hisses your name across the table, throwing you a stern glance. Yujin has a pleading look painting her own features.
“She would be happy to play for you,” Yuta says firmly, with no room for argument.
You swallow your dispute, looking back down at your bowl of soup as Lady Park scolds her daughter for her poor posture. In the corner of your eye, you see Jeno’s hand twitch.
Your head raises and you catch his stare — his eyes no longer holding the small glimmer of amusement you caught earlier.
The last thing you want is for Lee Jeno to feel sorry for you, so you return to finishing your meal, brushing off his concern.
After dinner, you go back to the drawing room and hesitantly take a seat at the grand piano in the corner of the room.
Your fingers clumsily press down on the keys, playing an off-tune version of the last piece you memorized. The group continues to chatter behind you as Lady Park invites Yujin to come visit whenever she pleases. Jeno slowly approaches you and you shake your head.
“There is no need to point out my terrible sense of musical inclination, Mr. Lee. It is a flaw I’m very well acquainted with.”
“I had no intention to do so,” he replies. “And no gentleman would ever raise attention to a fault a woman believes she has, even if he disagrees with her.”
You stop playing briefly to look up at him. He’s already staring back at you, his eyes now conveying an emotion you cannot recognize. You wonder what you would find if you peeled back a few layers of his hard exterior.
Jisung draws near, his hand cupping Jeno’s shoulder with familiarity.
“You must tell me how my dear cousin behaved when he was in your town.”
You laugh under your breath. “I must disappoint you, Mr. Park, as your cousin was very indifferent during his stay. Despite the many women begging for a dance and the lack of suitors on the floor, Mr. Lee still insisted on keeping to himself and refusing to make conversation with others.”
Jisung chuckles. “Truth be told, that sounds very akin to the cousin I know. I have never seen him dance with another woman willingly.”
You pause, remembering how Jeno asked you to dance the night of Jaemin’s ball. You recall how nervous he looked when he faced you, almost as if he was jumping out of his socks.
Jeno clenches his jaw. “Well, dear cousin, I am sure you understand how difficult it is for me to gab about with people I’m not familiar with. Dances are not something I take pleasure in.”
You interject. “Even if it is a woman’s choice of love language? A way you can show her your affection?”
The corner of his mouth twitches as he catches on to what you’re referring to.
“Perhaps then, there could be an exception.”
Lady Park admonishes you for not playing as instructed and you return to the piano, paying no heed to Jeno’s presence for the rest of the evening.
—
Your hand aches as you finish writing your letter to Jimin, sealing the envelope carefully.
You are anxious by the state of your sister’s duress, as it seems Mr. Na has still not come to visit her. Jimin is growing more and more disappointed by the day, feeling as if she has burdened your family with this ridiculous adventure. You wish you could see her and tell her that she would never be a burden to you, but writing a letter is the only communication you can give to her at this time while you continue your stay with Yujin and Yuta.
Just as you place the envelope back down on the table in your room, the door swings open.
You’re startled when Jeno walks through the door, his eyes frantic.
“Mr. Lee,” you say, failing to hide the surprise in your voice as you stand.
You both pay your respects and you wait for him to explain the meaning of his visit, as it has been a week since you saw him at Lady Park’s dinner festivities. However, the words seem to be caught in his throat because he says nothing to you, opening and closing his mouth furiously.
“Mr. and Mrs. Nakamoto went to the village,” you bring up, pondering if that was the reason he was here.
“Yes,” he clears his throat, fiddling with the sleeves of his coat. “Yes, it is a nice day to go to the village.”
You nod, still trying to decipher the reason why he’s here with no notice.
“This- This is a beautiful home,” he notes, bouncing from one foot to another.
It is the most disheveled you have ever seen him.
“Yes, I think so as well. Should I fetch us some tea?”
He immediately shakes his head. “No, no.”
You sit in an unpleasant silence for another few moments before you hear the front door open, signaling Yujin and Yuta’s return.
“Have a good day,” Jeno quickly says, walking swiftly down the hallway and out the cottage, not even bothering to acknowledge Yujin’s presence when he passes by.
Yujin stares incredulously after him, eyes darting over to you.
“What on earth have you done to poor Mr. Lee?”
You shake your head, puzzled by the odd interaction.
“I have no idea.”
—
“There are many conveniences which others may supply and which we cannot procure for ourselves
”
You fight the yawn threatening to come out as Yuta drones on in his sermon. One of the downsides of staying with Yujin and Yuta was the weekly attendance at the local church, where Yuta often read verses for the people. Yujin is always enthralled by her husband’s lectures, but you do not share her level of enthusiasm.
You lean over to whisper to Jisung, who is seated next to you.
“How much longer will you be in town, Mr. Park?”
“As long as my cousin needs,” he answers. “I am at his disposal.”
You scoff, imagining exactly how many people Jeno had at his disposal.
“I wonder why he does not marry so he can bring a woman alongside him instead of dragging you,” you quip.
Jisung laughs quietly. “If he did choose a woman, she would be very lucky. Jeno is a loyal man to both friends and family alike. I heard he recently helped save a friend from an unwise marriage.”
You frown. “Who was the friend?”
“One of his closest companions, Na Jaemin.”
Your features twist into a scowl, and you spot Jeno sitting across the church. Your chest fills with an indescribable rage.
“Did he explain why?” You ask Jisung.
“There were a lot of objections to the lady. I believe her family was not considered to be the right fit for a nobleman of his status.”
You could nearly feel the steam coming out of your ears. So this was the truth — Jeno found your family completely unruly and unfit for his standards and in return, he cut off Jimin’s chance of finding love. All of the pieces click into place and you clench your fists, wondering who gave him the right to dictate the fate of your family.
As soon as the sermon ends, you find the quickest exit, refusing to wait for Yujin and Yuta. You decide you must get back to their cottage to write to Jimin, insisting she come home and end her useless pining after Jaemin.
You gasp when you realize it’s raining, the heavy downpour soaking your dress. You waste no time, running as fast as you can until the church is no longer in sight.
After a mile, you see a nearby gazebo and decide to take shelter there to catch your breath. You place a hand on your chest, staring down at the hem of your dress, which is now covered in mud and dirt.
The call of your name causes you to gasp, and you look up to find the main character of your distress.
Jeno is also completely soaked from head to toe and offers you no time to say a word. “I have struggled in vain and I can bear it no longer. These past few months have been a torment. I came here with the sole purpose of seeing you and I must tell you how I am feeling. I am fighting against my family’s expectation and the inferiority of your birth because I am asking you to end my agony.”
You shake your head. “I do not understand-“
“I love you,” he confesses. You freeze, appalled by the revelation. “Most ardently. Please do me the honor by accepting my hand.”
You grit your teeth. “I apologize, Mr. Lee, for having caused you pain since our first meeting. I assure you it was not my intention.”
He raises an eyebrow. “Is this your reply?”
“Yes.”
“So it is a rejection?”
“Yes.”
He swallows. “May I ask why you are so quick to voice your refusal?”
You laugh. “Then may I ask why you think it is so brave of you to confess your love for me against your better judgment? I must be so uncouth for you to hold onto your feelings for so long instead of speaking them to me!”
“I did not mean-“
“And I am frankly horrified to think that you believe me to have no dignity that I would accept the hand in marriage of a man who has ruined the fate of my eldest sister, whom I admire with all of my heart!”
His expression falls at the mention of Jimin, and you laugh mockingly at catching his lie.
“Do you deny it, Mr. Lee? Breaking up a young couple in the height of their affection and forcing my sister to question her self-worth?”
“I do not deny it,” he replies sternly.
“What gave you the right-“
“I watched them out of respect for my friend and realized his attachment was deeper than hers,” he explains, but it only causes you to grow angrier.
“She’s shy! She has never been courted so seriously by another man before, especially not one that became so public,” you vouch for her.
He stands his ground. “Jaemin had realized she was not returning his affection with the same amount of passion-“
“Only after you suggested it!”
“I did it for his own good!”
“My sister rarely shows her true feelings to me,” you yell, and Jeno is taken aback. “You will never understand the burden an eldest sister has to face when there are no sons born to the family. You will never understand the weight on her shoulders when Mr. Nakamoto is knocking on the door, waiting to take away what little fortune your family possesses!”
He continues to defend himself. “There was a call into the character of your family and the suggestion of an advantageous marriage-“
You sneer. “How dare you assume Jimin would pursue such a thing!”
“It was not her, but your mother, on the other hand-“
You taunt him. “And what of Lee Donghyuck?”
He narrows his eyes and takes a step closer to you. “Lee Donghyuck?” He speaks the name as if someone poured acid on his tongue.
“What excuse could you possibly conjure of your behavior towards him?”
He purses his lips. “You take a great deal of interest in Donghyuck.”
“How can you defend the misfortunes you have put him in?”
He smiles mockingly. “Ah yes, I’m sure his misfortunes are vast in comparison to mine. I see that this is how you view me — a horrible villain who casts a dark shadow wherever he goes.”
“You are the one who has decided to insult the inferiority of my birth, which is beyond my own control! That arrogance and selfish disdain for the feelings of others is why I believe you are the last man in the world I would ever consider to marry!”
His expression crumbles. It is only now that you recognize how short the proximity between you two has gotten. He seems to have grasped the situation as well, eyes flickering downwards to stare at your lips. You swear that he begins to lean in before he stops himself.
You think you would let him kiss you, despite all signs pointing to it being a bad idea. The desire building in your stomach has you questioning your common sense.
There is no possible way you want Lee Jeno to kiss you, to mark you as his, to marry you in front of all those presumptuous nobles like Lady Park-
“Forgive me for taking up so much of your time.”
He turns and walks away, leaving you panting with a gaping hole in your chest.
—
Days pass before you hear from Jeno.
You contemplate returning home, but Yujin convinces you to stay for a little while longer. You write out a letter to Jimin to tell her everything, but for some reason, you never send it. You fear the gruesome picture you will paint of Jeno and consequently, Jimin’s feelings towards him. You somehow care for your sister’s approval for the rich nobleman although you turned down his proposal.
It’s another dreary night when Jeno shakes the cottage with his presence. You hear his blazing footsteps behind you but you refuse to look at him, staring at the wall in your room with your back turned to him.
He clears his throat. “I came to drop off this.”
You do not know what he has left, ignoring the miniscule part of your brain that screams at you to check.
You speculate on what he looks like — was he wearing that dreary trench coat he likes to walk around in? Was he wearing a mask of contempt at his behavior? Did he really mean what he said? Did he really love you?
“I shall not repeat the confessions that were so insulting to you, but if I may, I will address the two offenses you have laid against me,” he says.
You want to see him. You want to see if he has that stricken expression on his face, if he still has a hint of playfulness hidden in his eyes.
But when you turn around, he is gone. You would believe you had imagined him if not for the letter sitting neatly on the windowsill.
You swallow and open it, eyes scanning over his neat penmanship.
My father loved Donghyuck like a son. After his passing, my father left him a generous living, but Donghyuck made it clear that he would not be taking orders. He gambled away his living within weeks and demanded for more money from me, insisting it was what my father would have wanted. I refused, and he severed all acquaintance thereafter. He returned to us last summer in an attempt to court my sister, Jayoon, and convince her to elope with him. My sister is to inherit half of our estate. When it was made clear Donghyuck would not be receiving a penny of that inheritance, he disappeared once more. I will not try to explain the depth of Jayoon’s despair.
You gasp, eyes shuffling through the ink in disbelief. You could not comprehend the deceit and maliciousness Donghyuck possessed. The man you met was so poised and charismatic, but you suppose all the best con men were.
As for the matter of your sister and Jaemin, though the motives which governed me may to you appear insufficient, they were in the service of a friend.
Yujin’s voice pulls you out of your stupor. She enters your room, carrying a tray of your meal for the night. A worried look crosses her face at the sight of you, and that is when you realize you have started to cry. You wipe the tears falling down your cheeks.
“Are you okay?” Yujin asks, frantically coming over to you.
You hide Jeno’s letter behind your back, clutching onto it for dear life.
“I-I hardly think so.”
She lays her forehead on yours, understanding what you need.
“I believe it’s time for you to return home.”
—
“Honestly, if he passed by me in the street, I would hardly even recognize him.”
You brush off Jimin’s blatant lie and ignore the way she is combing her fingers through her hair as a nervous tick. She frowns at your faint smirk.
“It is true!” She claims, hitting your arm with mischief. “Anyway, what news comes from your visit with Mr. and Mrs. Nakamoto?”
You returned home shortly after Jeno delivered his letter. Yujin was sorrowful to see you go, but she recognized you needed to be with your family, no matter how loud and boisterous they could get. Jimin arrived a day before you, declaring her efforts worthless, much to your mother’s displeasure.
Jimin insists the experience was a pleasant one and that she learned a great many, and you would not dare refute her claims despite the numerous letters you received that say the opposite.
You smile at your sister’s question. “Nothing exciting.”
You had decided to keep the contents of Jeno’s letter for yourself, afraid to admit your blossoming feelings and ignorance at your accusations towards him. Considering Jimin is handling the loss of Jaemin better than expected, you also did not want to burden her with the truth.
The door to the drawing room bursts open and Minji comes parading through, screaming wildly.
“The heavens have truly blessed me!”
You raise an eyebrow at her as she collapses on the lounge, dress flowing across her hips in an improper fashion. Minjeong follows her into the room, looking cross with her hands folded across her chest.
“They are not sending you there because you are a suitable wife, they are sending you there because you are a disgrace to the family!”
“Minjeong!” You scold her, watching as Minji simply laughs at her sister’s insult. “What on earth are you two jabbering about?”
“Father is sending me to live with the Baek family,” Minji divulges, wiggling her feet in excitement.
Jimin stands, outraged by the information. “What? Minji, the Baek family live across town!”
“Yes, and is it not so delightful?” She giggles, ignoring you and Jimin’s worries. “There will be a handful of suitors there at my disposal!”
You and Jimin exchange a knowing glance before heading to your father’s office. He appears to be expecting your arrival, fingers pinching the bridge of his nose in anticipation of your anger.
“Father, you cannot send Minji away to the Baek family,” Jimin begins.
You continue. “She will make a fool out of herself and ridicule this family! She needs to be educated properly here, at home.”
Your father sighs. “Girls, you know I have tried with your sister, but she has become too complacent for my teachings. I trust Colonel Baek and his family to educate her about becoming well-behaved.”
“Father!” Jimin yells, utterly displeased. “Minji is not some farm animal you can dispose of as you please! She is part of this family, and her careless behavior is ours to own.”
“You cannot send her away or we might lose her forever.”
Your father shakes his head. “I’m sorry, girls, but my decision has been made. Minji will live with the Baek family and we will pray for success to come her way.”
You both scoff at him, infuriated by his carelessness. You leave his office and travel to the den in the kitchen, where your aunt and uncle are quietly eating. They have decided to stay for a while after dropping off Jimin.
Your aunt calls your name with joy. “Oh, you must join us this time out to the gardens in the district. It would do you well to take in some fresh air.”
You smile politely and take a seat on the bench across from your aunt. Your mind is still whirling at the thought of Minji, all alone, faring for herself at the countryside.
“I am satisfied staying here. I just returned from a trip to see a friend.”
Your uncle waves you off. “Come with us! There are many soldiers stationed in the area and plenty of suitors for your eyes to take in.”
“I have no desire to converse with them, uncle. Men are overtaken by their own arrogance or stupidity, and it would be a waste of my time to entertain them.”
Your aunt laughs mockingly at your pessimistic declaration.
“Well, what a voice of bitterness! My dear, do not allow your opinion of one man to cloud the wonderful soldiers who could bend and worship the ground you walk on,” your aunt advises.
You shake your head in disagreement.
“Men bring nothing but heartache.”
—
Much to your chagrin, your aunt and uncle convince you to travel with them through the district.
You are slightly grateful for their coercion as the breathtaking weather allows you to take a break from your resounding problems, albeit momentarily.
You stop in the middle of the journey as one of the wheels on your carriage is starting to lose its weight, and the coachman requires you to pull over so he can fix it. You lean on one of the nearby trees as your aunt and uncle sit beside you.
“Where exactly are we?” You ask, taking a look at your surroundings, yet all that encompasses you is trees.
“I believe we are close to the Lee estate.”
Your ears perk up. “Lee Jeno?”
“Yes, that’s the fellow,” your uncle murmurs. “I heard his estate is surrounded by a great lake. I have an immense desire to see it for myself.”
“Oh, let’s not,” you immediately object.
Your aunt and uncle turn to you with a raised eyebrow, curious about your swift rejection.
You clear your throat. “I mean, he is awfully busy, I am sure. We would not want to bother him.”
“Do not fret, dear,” your aunt assures. “Great men like him are usually never home.”
You swallow down your further protests, refusing to tell your aunt and uncle the real reason why you cannot see Jeno again.
Once the carriage is fixed, you travel to the Lee estate. As many have vouched, the estate expands beyond your wildest dreams. A large lake covers the entire front yard, with more windows and doors around the house than you could ever conjure up in your mind.
One of the maidens comes out to greet you. Your aunt and uncle are eager to receive a tour and you glance around, picturing the spots where Jeno would walk through, probably dragging that awful trench coat behind him. You giggle at the thought.
“Has something caught your interest, ma’am?” The maiden asks you and you jump, quickly wiping the smile off of your face.
“Oh, no, no. I was simply wondering if Mr. Lee’s sister was home.”
She nods. “Yes, the young girl is likely wrapped up in her piano lesson. You may go search for her while I show your aunt and uncle the gardens if you wish.”
Your aunt touches your arm fondly. “Meet us back at the lodging when you are finished.”
You faintly hear the sound of the piano drift from upstairs, and you follow the noise. You drink in your sights as you go, marveling at the expensive marble columns and gold accents of the house. You ponder over the idea of Jeno choosing the decorations himself.
You finally find the door to one of the drawing rooms, and you open it by a sliver. You catch a glimpse of Jayoon’s long hair with her back turned towards you, her fingers playing a melody as if she had memorized it from birth. You gape at the young girl’s talent.
Your heart beats wildly in your chest when Jeno’s frame comes into view, tapping Jayoon on the shoulder and surprising her. She gasps and jumps into his arms, clearly not expecting his presence.
You make the mistake of moving your foot, which causes the hard flooring to creak beneath your weight. The sound alerts Jeno and his head turns to the entrance of the doorway, where he catches your eye.
You wheeze, quickly spinning around and darting back down the stairs. You must look like a clumsy oaf but you do not care, trying your best at getting as far from the estate as possible. You manage to find yourself outside, but before you can descend down the back entryway, you hear Jeno calling your name.
You squeeze your eyes shut momentarily before slowly facing him.
“I-I apologize, I thought you were out of town.”
He swallows, his once confident stare now filled with nothing but anxiety.
“I came home a day early,” he explains.
He’s wearing that long trench coat again. You wonder if he ever takes it off.
“We wouldn’t have come if we had known you were here-“
“I had some business with my steward-“
You both pause when you realize you’re speaking over one another. His eyes soften at the sight of you.
You avoid his gaze.
“I’m visiting with my aunt and uncle.”
He nods. “And are you having a pleasant trip?”
You blink nervously. “Yes. Tomorrow we are heading to the district before going back home.”
“Tomorrow?” You swear you hear the disappointment in his voice, but it could be a figment of your imagination. “Are you staying nearby?”
You nod and tell him where you’ll be lodging. You place your hand over your chest in an attempt to control your frenzied heartbeat.
“I apologize again for intruding. They said the house was open for visitors and I had no idea you would be home-“
“You’re always welcome here,” he says, his voice filled with honesty. Goosebumps rise on your arms at his frank statement. “Shall I see you into town?”
“No, no,” you object, taking a step back. “I would much prefer to walk. I like to do that — to walk.”
You want to hit yourself over the head. You sound foolish.
Jeno just smiles, laughing to himself. You do not think you have ever seen him this way. Your stomach erupts with butterflies at the sight of his handsome grin.
“Yes, I’m well acquainted with that fact.”
You stare down at your feet, recalling the day you had run nearly three miles in the rain instead of waiting for Yujin and Yuta’s carriage. You’re curious if Jeno had to also run that far just to catch you. Did he catch a cold?
“I shall see myself off then. Goodbye, Mr. Lee.”
You curtsy, refusing to take another glance at him before fleeing the grounds of the estate.
You think about him on your walk back into the village. You envision him as a child, running through the gardens and playing games with the staff. You smile at the thought.
When you find the inn you’ll be staying at for the night, you inform your aunt and uncle of your return before slipping into your room. You decide to freshen up before supper, ridding your mind of any thoughts related to Jeno. You remind yourself that you will likely not see him again, so any of these confusing feelings that are rising need to be squashed.
Your aunt and uncle, however, have a different idea when you join them downstairs.
“My dear, Mr. Lee was just here!”
“What?”
“Yes!” Your uncle is overjoyed. “He invited us to dine with him tomorrow. You don’t mind delaying our journey another day, do you?”
“I-I suppose not.”
An ominous shiver runs down your spine.
—
A lively tune greets you at the Lee estate.
You pause when you see Jayoon playing at the keys with Jeno standing beside the piano to hear her. She stops when she sees you enter the drawing room, jumping up and running over to curtsy before you. She says your name with clear fondness.
You smile and return the curtsy, a little startled by her warmth towards you.
“My sister, Jayoon,ïżœïżœïżœ Jeno introduces, walking over. Your breath hitches at his presence.
“My brother has told me so much about you,” Jayoon beams. Your eyes flit to Jeno’s frame, and his head is bowed slightly in embarrassment. “I feel as if we are friends already.”
“It is an honor to finally meet you,” you say. “You play the piano beautifully.”
She bashfully stares down at her feet. “You flatter me so. My brother tells me you’re an exceptional player as well.”
You laugh. “Then he has uttered the most ridiculous lie.”
Jeno chuckles, staring yearningly at you.
“To be fair, I said you were a good player.”
“Ah, well good is not quite exceptional, now is it?”
He smiles at your jest. You both fail to notice how long you have been gazing at one another until Jayoon clears her throat. You divert your eyes and Jeno ignores how red his ears have gotten.
He addresses your aunt and uncle, who are standing behind you.
“I have heard your uncle is fond of fishing.”
“Yes, very much so,” your uncle replies with elation.
“I would be honored if you joined me out on the lake today,” Jeno invites, and your uncle nearly jumps for joy.
“And what about you?” Jayoon asks. “Do you play duets on the piano?”
You chuckle. “Not if I can help it.”
“Oh, brother, you must make her!” Jayoon says playfully.
Jeno looks at you. “She has quite the independent mind, dear sister. I am afraid I cannot make her do anything she does not wish.”
You do not return his stare, fearing you’ll get lost in his eyes.
Jeno and your uncle head to the lake to begin their fishing session while you and your aunt stay with Jayoon to chat and play the piano. You’re in the midst of drinking tea when Jayoon says something that nearly causes you to choke.
“My brother talks of you quite a lot,” Jayoon reveals with a knowing smile. Your aunt’s eyebrow ticks up. “He says you are different from the noblewomen we usually conversate with.”
“Yes, that sounds like something he would say,” you murmur, refusing to peer over at your aunt, who you know has a million questions to bombard you with. “I do not believe your brother chats with many noblewomen to begin with.”
Jayoon giggles. “You would fare on the correct side in relation to that guess. I have desired for him to find a lifelong partner but there has been no one who has peaked his interest until recently.”
You fiddle with your teacup, ignoring Jayoon’s smirk.
Your aunt’s puzzled tone speaks first. “How long has Mr. Lee been acquainted with my niece?”
“A few months only,” you answer before Jayoon can say something else that would embarrass you. “We met when Mr. Na first came into town.”
“Ah yes,” your aunt sighs, very familiar with Jaemin considering Jimin stayed in her home for weeks to capture his attention. “Does Mr. Na come to visit here often, Jayoon?”
She shakes her head. “Not as much lately. I believe he has been preoccupied for most of the season.”
Your aunt grumbles under her breath. You’re pleased by her disdain for Jaemin, understanding how tough this time has been for Jimin.
A maiden suddenly knocks on the door and Jayoon instructs her to enter. She says she has a letter for you and you furrow your eyebrows, taking the envelope from her hands. You recognize Jimin’s handwriting and rip open the letter immediately.
You gasp when you read its contents, placing Jayoon and your aunt on high alert.
“What is it, dear? What’s happened?”
You clutch your chest, heaving. “W-We must return home! At once!”
The two women try to stop you but you sprint out of the house and onto the lake, calling for your uncle with the most desperate voice you can muster. Jeno spots you first, quickly dropping his fishing rod and rushing over to you.
“What’s wrong? Are you injured?”
He clutches your elbows, scanning your figure for any visible wounds. You cannot stop the tears flowing down your face, your mind too overtaken with fear to think about how close Jeno is.
“It’s Minji,” you cry. “S-She has run away! With Lee Donghyuck!”
You crumble and he wraps his arms around you. Your uncle hurriedly comes to your side.
“What? When has this happened?”
“I do not know,” you choke back on your tears as Jeno gently wipes them away. “They do not know where she has gone! She has no money, no connections, no future!”
“This is my fault,” Jeno whispers. “I should have exposed Donghyuck.”
Your uncle gently takes the letter from your fingers, reading the words for himself. You hear Jayoon and your aunt approach, catching their breath from chasing you.
“What is it? What has her so enervated?” Your aunt questions.
Your uncle relays the message, including the part where your father has gone to the Baek family to search for Minji.
Jeno strokes your hair in comfort and you knock back your better judgment, digging your face into the collar of his trench coat.
“We must find Minji as soon as we can,” your aunt gasps. “If the news gets out, the family will be ruined!”
“I will fix it,” Jeno says with conviction.
You shake your head. “You can’t. This is my fault — I should have told my family the truth about Donghyuck or this wouldn’t have happened.”
“Do not blame yourself,” Jeno hisses, cupping his hands over your cheeks and forcing you to look at him. His eyes are filled with steadfast determination. “We will get this sorted.”
“I shall join your father in his search for Minji,” your uncle declares. “Mr. Lee, I ask for your favor in borrowing one of your carriages.”
“Of course,” Jeno agrees. “Jayoon, please show him the way.”
Jayoon casts another glance at you embraced in Jeno’s arms before guiding your uncle away.
“I will ask for our carriage to be prepared to take you home,” your aunt says, also leaving the two of you.
You sniffle, feeling shameful by your appearance in front of Jeno. He stares at you in distress.
“I apologize for my behavior-“
“I wish you would cease asking forgiveness in front of me. You never have to.”
Your breath hitches at his candor. Your bodies are as close to one another as the rainy day he first confessed to you. If you tilt your head forward a few inches, you could plant a kiss on his lips.
You compose yourself and take a step back.
“Mr. Lee, I-I should go.”
“Yes, yes,” he mumbles, clearly taken aback by his own actions. “I hope your family can remedy the situation.”
You turn to leave but he stutters out a request.
“And please, take care of yourself.”
You glance back at him, eyes welled with tears.
“You as well, Mr. Lee.”
—
When you return home, your mother is bedridden and wailing.
You and Jimin gather around her bed as she sobs. “Oh, what shall we do? You are all ruined. Who will wed you now with a fallen sister? And now your poor father will have to go off and fight Lee Donghyuck!”
You and Jimin exchange a glance. Jimin clears her throat.
“Father hasn’t even found Mr. Lee yet, mother.”
Your mother ignores her and continues. “And then Mr. Nakamoto will turn us out when your father is killed! Oh, Minji must know what this will do for my nerves. How can she vex her poor mother like this?”
You decide to head downstairs, agreeing that your mother’s avid concerns would not be subdued any time soon. You frown when you see Minjeong in the kitchen, holding a letter in her hands.
“What have you got there?”
Jimin snatches it out of Minjeong’s grasp and scans it herself. “It’s addressed to father. It’s in uncle’s writing.”
You hear the familiar sound of the carriage pulling up and you all dart outside, frantically waving the letter around.
“Father! Father!”
He groans, taking a step out of the carriage. “Let me get my bearings first.”
“It’s a letter for you! From uncle!” You say, thrusting it into his hands.
He opens it as he walks back to the house, dismissing your frantic jumping to read the contents.
“Well?” Minjeong says impatiently. “What does it say?”
“He’s found them.”
Jimin gasps. “Are they married?”
He squints. “I cannot make out the script-“
You seize it and read it for yourself. Jimin and Minjeong lurk over your shoulder.
“Are they married?” Jimin asks again.
You sigh. “They will be, under the condition that father pays Lee Donghyuck a small sum for Minji per year.”
Minjeong scoffs. “A small sum! How barbaric!”
“Well? Will you pay it, father?” Jimin questions. Minjeong takes the letter from you to read it again.
“Of course I will agree. The matter of the question is how much your uncle has already laid on this wretched man,” your father exhales, walking back into the house sluggishly.
You turn to Jimin. “What does he mean?”
She shrugs. “Uncle must have threatened Mr. Lee wickedly. For the situation, with the three of us still unmarried and the family’s reputation hanging by a thread, Mr. Lee would be foolish to only settle for a small sum.”
You scowl. “Heaven forbid the day we have to welcome that wretched man into the family.”
The day comes sooner than you think. Minji and Donghyuck arrive a few weeks later, with Minji beaming at her newfound status as a married woman. You roll your eyes at her airy nature at the dinner table.
“You must all visit the Baek family soon. That is the place to get husbands! I hope you have half of my good luck.”
“Good luck?” Minjeong scoffs. “You nearly ruined our family!”
Your mother scolds Minjeong for her outburst before turning to Minji with a smile.
“I want to hear every detail, my darling Minji.”
You and Jimin chuckle at your mother’s quick change in heart. She was out of bed and celebrating as soon as you told her the news of Minji getting married.
You exchange a look with Donghyuck across the table, and he appears remorseful. You mock him and laugh.
Minji rattles off the story about the last few weeks with Donghyuck and their wedding. You tell her you do not want to hear it but she ignores you.
“I wondered if my dear Donghyuck would be married in his blue coat, as I love the way he looks in it. And of course, because of the quick ceremony, I worried that uncle would not make it in time to be the best man. Luckily, he arrived on time or else I would’ve had to ask Mr. Lee Jeno but I don’t really like that man.”
You pause. “Lee Jeno?”
Minji gasps and covers her mouth, making sure no one else at the table heard her slip up. “Oh heavens, I forgot. I should not have said a word.”
You prod her further. “Mr. Lee was at your wedding?”
She lowers her voice into a whisper, and you realize she cannot help herself in dishing out the truth.
“He was the one who discovered us. He paid for everything — the wedding ceremony, Donghyuck’s sum, all of my new dresses, everything!” Her elated expression turns serious. “But do not say a word to anyone! He told me not to tell.”
You’re astounded by the secret. “M-Mr. Lee?” You clarify for your own sanity.
She shoots you a sour look. “Quit it!”
You sit back in your chair, feeling as if you need to catch your breath. You cannot believe Jeno went out of his way to save Minji and fix her horrid nuptials to Donghyuck. It’s no wonder that Donghyuck only asked for a small sum from your father as Jeno must have paid the rest.
You digest the information, wondering how it was possible for a man like Lee Jeno to exist and how it was possible that he so clearly loved a girl like you.
—
You hear rumors of Jaemin’s return to town, pushing Jimin to a state of disarray. She insists she does not care about his arrival, but when a local butcher tells you that he comes without a woman by his side, her interest is clearly piqued. You attempt to convince her to locate him, but she still persists she does not care about the origin of his visit.
You are lounging in the drawing room when Minjeong comes bursting through the door.
“He is here! Mr. Na is here!”
Her announcement sends the room into a frenzy, with your mother gasping and shooting out of her chair, nearly tripping over the furniture. Jimin is on her feet, combing her fingers through her hair and straightening her dress. You flee to the window, shocked when you see not only Jaemin approaching, but Jeno walking right beside him.
“Act natural, girls!” Your mother shouts, struggling to stand.
You quickly draw back from the window, hand over your heart. You are not thoroughly prepared to face Jeno again, especially now knowing how far he has gone to ensure your family wasn’t laid to ruin.
Your mother pushes Minjeong down into a seat and shoves some fabric into her hands to make it appear like she’s been embroidering. Jimin cries at you in despair and you help her tie a ribbon around her waist and brush her hair.
Your mother throws you a book and you all hurriedly sit in different areas of the room, looking as natural as you possibly can.
There is a knock on the door before one of your handmaidens enters.
“Mr. Na and Mr. Lee,” she introduces, stepping aside so the men can set foot in.
You all stand, curtsying as they bow. You beg your heart rate to stop thumping in your ears.
Jeno looks so attractive that it makes you want to curl into yourself and scream. He avoids your gaze, and you contemplate if he no longer wants to be with you because of Minji’s incident.
Jaemin opens his mouth to speak, but your mother beats him to it.
“How glad we are to see you again, Mr. Na! I am sure you have heard of my youngest getting married while you were away. We are very proud of her accomplishments.”
Jaemin smiles politely. “Yes, I heard the great news. I offer my congratulations.”
His eyes drift to Jimin’s form, and you see your sister smile timidly at him.
Your mother continues. “It is a shame that Mr. Lee Donghyuck lives so far. Having my youngest taken away at such an early age is no easy feat.”
You interrupt her, hoping to salvage the conversation for Jimin’s sake.
“How long are you in town for, Mr. Na?”
“Just a few weeks for the hunt.”
You forget that now is the best time for hunting season, and many men in town partake in the activity. Your eyes flit once again to Jeno’s form, and you catch him staring at you briefly before he looks away. The butterflies in your stomach will surely make you ill.
“Oh, Mr. Na, you must come here once you get bored of the game in town. My husband would love to oblige you,” your mother invites.
Jaemin’s smile never wavers. “Yes, that sounds splendid. Thank you.”
“How are you, Mr. Lee?” You ask.
You cannot help yourself. You have dreamed about him since you left the estate and he has to take accountability for your sleepless nights.
He momentarily glances at you. “I’m quite well, thank you.”
“I hope the weather is favorable when you go hunting,” you say.
He nods. “I return home tomorrow. I will not be participating in this year’s hunt.”
Your heart drops. “So soon?”
He refuses to look at you again.
“My Jimin looks beautiful, does she not?” Your mother questions Jaemin.
He stutters. “O-Oh yes, she does indeed.”
The room is filled with silence, and while you’re pleading for Jeno to look at you, Jimin is desperately wanting Jaemin to say more.
Jaemin swallows before clearing his throat. “W-Well, we must be going, I think. It was lovely to see you all again.”
“You must come visit,” your mother reminds him. “You promised last time you were in town that you would attend a family dinner.”
Jaemin awkwardly nods before scurrying out of the house. Jeno lingers, looking disappointed.
He bows his head. “Excuse me.”
The request for him to stay lays on the tip of your tongue but he exits before you can ask.
Once the two men are gone, you all collapse back in your seats. You rush to Jimin’s side as your mother voices, “How unusual!”
Your sister seems as optimistic as ever, despite the gloomy look in her eye.
“Perhaps that was for the best,” she hollowly laughs. “Now I will not have to go to bed wondering about my fate. He’s clearly moved on and is no longer interested.”
“Jimin,” you sigh, placing a hand over hers. “You do not have to fabricate your feelings to me. I may also be hiding some truths that I am not content with.”
Her head whips around. “Like what?”
Before you can finally tell her your secret, Minjeong’s voice screeches.
“He is back!”
“What?” Your mother screams, flinging her body at the window.
You catch the billowing of Jaemin’s coat before you’re being hauled up again by your mother. Jaemin enters the room in a more uncoordinated fashion, not even alerting the handmaiden so she can announce his presence. His hair is sticking up in random directions, indicating he was likely running his hands through it nervously.
“I apologize for my abrupt actions, but I would like to request an audience with Jimin if I may.”
All of your mouths drop open. Your mother speaks first.
“Everyone into the kitchen,” she instructs, and you nearly trip when she pushes you forward.
You grab Minjeong’s wrist and tug her with you. Your mother closes the door behind her and all three of you immediately press your ears against it to listen in.
“First, I must tell you that I have been a halfwitted and reckless fool,” you hear Jaemin start to say. You scoff, internally agreeing with him. Minjeong elbows you to be quiet. “And second, I want to atone for the months I have been away. My fair Jimin, I will wrong you no further. Would you do me the honor of accepting my hand in marriage?”
You all gasp.
Moments pass before Jimin’s shaky voice replies, “Yes, a thousand times yes!”
Your mother bursts open the door and screeches in delight.
“My heavens, I never believed the day would come!”
You hurry in to envelope Jimin in a hug and congratulate her. The embrace gives you a direct view of the window, where a stony Lee Jeno stands in a far distance. You hold your breath, hoping he would come inside as well and give his own second version of a proposal. You would not hesitate to accept this time.
However, he merely situates himself there for a few seconds longer before turning away and leaving. You shut your eyes, quelling the ache in your chest and pulling Jimin closer to congratulate her once again.
—
That night, you giggle as you lay in bed with your sister.
“A spring wedding!” She exclaims, and your heart is full at the sight of her happiness. “Oh, he just looked so nervous but he had no idea how my heart was pounding out of my chest, sister. I wish for you to be this happy one day.”
Unlike the way Minji declared it to demean you, Jimin says it with pure virtue.
You fake a smile, thinking about how you screwed up your chances of ever being with Jeno.
“Maybe Mr. Nakamoto has a friend.”
She bursts into laughter at your joke and you pretend to share her joy. Your satisfaction, however, is broken by the sound of a carriage pulling up outside.
You frown. “Do you hear that?”
It was already well past midnight, so if a visitor was approaching, it must have been with urgent news. You and Jimin hop out of bed and rush downstairs, where the rest of your family is also starting to gather.
There’s a knock at the door and your father wobbles over to answer it.
You gasp when you see who is behind it.
“L-Lady Park?”
The woman shuffles in haggardly, and you all curtsy and bow at her presence. She looks disturbed, mouth twisted into an angry frown.
Your father awkwardly talks first. “May I offer you a cup of tea, madam?”
“Absolutely not. I need to speak with your second oldest alone.”
All eyes turn to you. You swallow and step forward, gesturing to the drawing room and leading Lady Park inside. You shut the door, placing a candle on a nearby table to provide you some semblance of sight.
Your palms sweat at the thought of what Lady Park had to confront you with. Perhaps you should not have messed around with Jimin — maybe Lady Park really was here to marry you off to one of Mr. Nakamoto’s friends.
“I am sure you are not puzzled by the reasoning behind my visit.”
You blink. “You are mistaken, ma’am. I cannot conjure up why you have honored my family here tonight by your presence.”
She scowls. “I warn you, dear girl, I am not one to be trifled with. A message has reached me that my nephew, Mr. Lee, has intended to unite you in the union of marriage.” You freeze, your mind running through a myriad of scenarios. “I know this to be a scandalous falsehood, so I instantly traveled here to make my sentiments known.”
You narrow your eyes at her degrading tone. “If you had thought the rumor so impossible, I ponder why you decided to travel so far.”
She steps forward, her scowl transforming into an expression filled with more hatred.
“I came to hear it be contradicted.”
“Your appearance will only serve as a confirmation if indeed such a report exists,” you say.
“If?” She spits out bitterly. “Are you meaning to pretend to not know of it? Were you not the one who started such a malicious lie to bring down the reputation of my dear nephew?”
“I have never heard of it!” You defend yourself.
“So my nephew has not made you an offer of marriage?”
You raise your head high. “You are the one who has declared such a thing to be impossible.”
You can practically see her shake with rage. “Mr. Lee has been engaged to my daughter since their infancy. Now what have you to say?”
“If that is the case, then there is no reason Mr. Lee would make an offer to me.”
“You listen to me, you selfish girl — if you think a woman of inferior birth with a scandalous sister who married the first suitor she came across can come in and tarnish Mr. Lee’s reputation, I will surely prove you wrong. Now tell me the truth, are you engaged to him?”
You contain yourself. “I am not.”
“And do you promise to never enter such an engagement?”
You put your foot down. You refuse to allow this woman to come into your home, insult you, and forbid you from marrying the man you know you yearn for.
“I shall never promise such a thing. You have traveled here in the dead of night to offend me in every possible way and I will tolerate it no longer. I must ask you to leave.”
You swing open the door, exposing your entire family on the opposite side of it, who were likely listening in on your ordeal. Lady Park gives you one last glance, and if looks could kill, you would be six feet underground.
“I have never been so disrespected in my entire life!” Lady Park declares before taking her leave, shutting the front door with great force.
“My dear, what is going on?”
“Why does she think something is happening between you and Mr. Lee?”
“Did Mr. Lee propose to you?”
You flee from your family’s questioning, running up the stairs with tears in your eyes.
“For once in your life, leave me alone!”
—
It is the break of dawn when you decide to take a walk.
You could not sleep all night. Jimin slipped into your bed at one point and comforted you wordlessly, wrapping her arms around you. You thought about Jeno and Lady Park’s scornful words. If you had a little less dignity, you would have told her how her nephew proposed to you but in all your stupidity, you denied him. She would probably get a laugh out of that.
You stare down at your feet, kicking around the patches of weeds childishly. Your breath hitches when another pair of shoes land before you.
You raise your head to see Lee Jeno standing there in all of his glory.
You say the first thing that comes to mind.
“I couldn’t sleep.”
“Nor I.”
You nod, pulling your jacket tighter around your shoulders. “Your aunt was here-“
“I should make amends for such insolent behavior.”
You shake your head. “After everything you have done to save Minji and I suspect to help Jimin, I should be the one apologizing for my behavior.”
“I told you that you never have to apologize to me, didn’t I? You must know I did all of it for you.” He says, smiling. You wonder if you could ever be this infatuated with another human being. “I came here because I beg you not to trifle with me. My aunt’s visit has provided me hope — a feeling I thought had disappeared months ago. I plead with you to tell me if your affections have changed.”
He takes a step closer to you. His eyes melt with a familiar fondness.
“If they have changed, I must tell you that you have bewitched me, body and soul. I love you, and I wish to never be parted from you from this day forth.”
You can no longer hold back your grin. You close the distance, gently tugging on the lapels of his dreary trench coat. You press your lips to his and his control officially snaps, one hand wrapping around your middle and tugging you closer. He kisses you with fervor, as if it is the last thing on earth he will ever get to do.
You giggle and pull back to catch your breath.
“Tell me, please,” he whispers with desperation. “I can bear it no longer.”
“I love you,” you say, stroking your fingers through his hair. “I love, love, love you.”
He kisses you again, hand traveling to the back of your neck and pulling you as close as humanly possible. He kisses you like he is afraid that you will slip out of his grasp. Warmth pools at the bottom of your stomach at his obvious desire.
“W-We should speak to my father,” you pant against his mouth.
“Yes, yes,” he agrees, catching his own breath. “A spring wedding? Or we could get married now, I have no objection-“
You giggle. “Mr. Lee, don’t get too ahead of yourself.”
“I cannot help it. I have waited too long for you to be in my embrace.”
“Then we shall not wait a second longer.”
—
You marry Lee Jeno on a beautiful day in spring.
The ceremony is simple at your request, and your mother cries when you walk down the aisle. Yujin sobs when she sees you in a veil, joyful that you have finally found your happy ending.
Your father was initially confused when you came to his office hand in hand with your betrothed until you explained to him the true nature of your feelings and all of the actions Jeno had taken to save your family. Jimin and Minjeong demanded to know all of the details you kept from them, and Minji even traveled into town to also hear your side of events.
Jeno has the wedding planned faster than you can blink, stressing that he cannot endure another day without you as his wife.
You have awoken something primal in him, and it shows on your wedding night.
He nearly breaks open the bedroom door as he pushes you in, shutting it loudly and practically throwing you on the bed. You laugh when he hovers over you, pressing kisses down your neck.
“Jeno, Jeno,” you hum, smiling as he tugs your wedding dress up. “Slow down, my love.”
“I want to taste you,” he groans against your collarbone.
His deep voice sends a shiver down your spine. You have only heard stories about what happens between a husband and his wife in their bedroom. They were usually filled with salacious recountings from many of the schoolgirls around you growing up. You honestly have no idea what you’re in for tonight, but all you know is that you would let Jeno take you at his heart’s desire.
“Too many buttons,” he grumbles against your chest, and you gasp when he rips your dress clean down the middle.
“Jeno!” You begin to scold but it turns into a moan when his lips latch onto your left breast, tongue flicking at your nipple lewdly.
“You’re mine, are you not? My wife, my forever,” he mumbles, kissing down your stomach until he is face to face with your core.
You tense at the sight of him being so close to an intimate part of your body. He senses your nerves, looking up at you and interlacing his hands with yours.
“It is quite alright, Mrs. Lee,” he smirks at your new surname. “You can trust me.”
You take a deep breath and relax. “I trust you.”
The first swipe of his tongue against your core takes your breath away. Your spine arches at the exhilarating feeling. He moves your hand until it is resting on his hair, urging you to pull at the strands as you please.
He laps at your folds eagerly, lips mouthing over you passionately. You cry when he suddenly takes your clit in his mouth and sucks hard.
He unlocks a new type of pleasure you never believed was possible — tremors running down your body as you chase the high. You fail to realize your hips are moving on their own accord, twisting and riding his face.
When the pleasure begins to subside, Jeno pulls away and lets you catch your breath.
“What was that?” You wheeze.
He chuckles, hoisting himself up to kiss you. He trails kisses across your cheek.
“Did it feel good, my pearl?”
“I-I need to feel that again.”
His laughter is like music to your ears. He nuzzles his face into your neck.
“Would you like me to show you how much better I can make you feel?”
You nod and he raises his head to see you. “I love you,” he murmurs, leaning forward to kiss you again.
Since the day you confessed your feelings, he hasn’t failed to remind you of his love nearly every hour of every day.
“When this is over, will I bear your child?” You ask, genuinely curious about the answer.
He strokes your hair gently. “Is that something you want?”
You laugh and bob your head. “Of course. We simply cannot live in this grand house by ourselves. I fear I will go hysterical.”
“Then we will have as many children as you like, Mrs. Lee.”
He begins to undress and you eye him as respectfully as you can. You wish you had known Jeno was hiding his muscular glory underneath those boring trench coats. You likely would not have rejected him the first time if you were made aware.
“Please resist drooling.”
You narrow your eyes playfully. “You’re my husband. I may drool as I please.”
He grins and throws his coat and shirt to the side, slowly unbuttoning his pants. Your mouth waters when he finally takes off his undergarments.
His cock is beautiful, if you’re even allowed to say that. Pretty and pink and long. A bit of liquid leaks from the tip and you suddenly get a craving to taste it.
“We have all the time for you to do that later. I want to show you a good time now,” he says as if he can read your mind.
You smile and pull him close, pressing your lips together. You watch as he gives his cock a few tugs before lining it up to your entrance.
“This may hurt at first, but I promise it will feel satisfactory if you loosen your body,” he says, ensuring that you are listening carefully.
You nod, happy twinkle never disappearing from your eyes.
“I trust you.”
The first thrust is painful. You exhale, focusing on not tensing up your body too much as Jeno instructed. He soothes you, fingers running up and down your sides lightly.
“You are so perfect for me,” he hums. “I should have married you sooner.”
When he’s finally all the way inside, you take a deep breath. He rests his forehead on yours.
“Good?”
You stroke his cheek fondly. “Good, my love.”
He rolls his hips into yours and you groan. He picks up a steady beat until the furrow in your brow vanishes. A wave of pleasure shoots up your spine and you gasp, triggering Jeno to pick up his pace.
He grips the headboard tightly between his fingers, planting his knees on the mattress before driving into you.
“O-Oh!” You moan, not anticipating how intoxicating this would feel.
You raise your hips and subconsciously move to meet his thrusts. He groans at your effort, slowly losing it at how tight you feel around him.
“Here,” he says, moving one hand downwards to pinch your clit and roll it between his fingers.
“Ungh,” you wail, throwing your head back. “That’s so good, Jeno. Keep going.”
Vulgar sounds fill the bedroom with skin slapping skin and your moans mixed with his grunts. You probably look maniacal with the way you’re desperately chasing your high, but you have no care in the world right now.
Your mind is merely screaming Jeno’s name.
He collapses back on you, kissing you with an intensity you could not describe. You swear you see stars explode behind your eyes.
“May I try something?” He pants into your mouth.
You agree and he withdraws himself from you, nearly causing you to whimper at the loss. He grabs your hips and twists you around, taking off the scraps of your dress and flinging it to the floor. His hand pushes down your head and arches your back. You turn your head to the side and moan.
“Please, Jeno, please-“
He eases himself back inside, answering your pleas.
He breathes heavily, squeezing his eyes shut. “You are torturing me beyond no end.”
This position hits a different spot inside of you. You mewl, clawing at the sheets. You have never felt closer to Jeno until this moment with the way his cock fits so perfectly inside of you.
He leans down to press kisses to your shoulders.
“May I use you as I wish?”
The question almost has you whining.
“Whatever you like, my love. Please, use me for your pleasure.”
He drills into you, forcing his cock into your dripping hole until you weep for him. You bury your face into his pillow, preventing your screams from growing too loud when you ultimately fall into your second climax. It hits a lot harder than the first, especially since Jeno shows no signs of stopping.
You cry when he changes positions again, falling to his side and moving you to do the same, hiking up your leg until it’s wrapped around his hip. He angles himself so that he hits you deeper.
You wonder if you look like a woman vexed, completely overtaken by lust. He pounds into you to coax your third orgasm to come to bay.
You beg for him, unsure of what you’re pleading for.
“Please, please, please-“
His hand strikes at your clit, slapping it with an unexpected force. You dive headfirst into your peak, crying and whimpering until your throat is sore.
Your body tries to squirm away from Jeno’s sharp thrusts but he doesn’t let you, holding you down and turning you so that your stomach presses against the mattress again.
His cock beats into your soaking cunt before he reaches his own high, groaning loudly as he spills his seed deep into you. It is only then that he finally slows down, collapsing onto the bed and pulling you into his arms.
You both pant, trying to catch your breath as his cum leaks down your thighs.
“So we can do that all the time now?” You huff.
He laughs and kisses your forehead.
“Whenever you would like, Mrs. Lee.”
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uravitypng · 8 months ago
Text
𝐱'𝐩 đČđšđźđ«đŹ
pairing: bakusquad x chubby reader (katsuki bakugo + hanta sero + mina ashido + eijiro kirishima + denki kaminari)
word count: 4.4k words
a/n: definitely haven't been working on this for months <33 this turned out more fluffy than intended for a free use fic asdfghj. basically they all need to be dating!!! none of the bakusquad have any contact with each other... yet... idk i might make a part two where they're not just taking turns but all together with the reader
content warnings: free use, unprotected vaginal sex, oral (f!recieving & m!recieving), vaginal fingering, multiple orgasms, cockwarming, groping, biting, dumbification, slight breeding mention, somno, wlw, spanking, petnames - mdni (like my whole tumblr)
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when becoming friends and roommates with the bakusquad you didn't realise what it would exactly entail. becoming friends with five successful pro heroes while you're a civilian is something you would never expect, not in your wildest dreams, so it's not a surprise to you that your feelings for them grew with each day and after a particular turn of events you let them use you however they wanted. if they want to take out their frustrations of a stressful day by roughly fucking you than you're more than willing to oblige to their request or if they want to tenderly make love to you after an emotional and exhausting day you're more than willing to oblige- you're their toy after all.
they'll use you anywhere and anywhen, it doesn't matter if you're in public or if you're sleeping, you've given them your full consent.
the first time it happened was with katsuki. he was angry and annoyed and you didn't know what to do, you've never truly seen him like this before and you haven't been friends with him as long as the others have been friends with him, you didn't want to make it worse. ideally you would ask the others what you should do but they were all busy working.
you later found out a journalist cornered him after a minor rescuing incident and asked him more intrusive questions than normal and that day it got to him more than normal too. for some reason the press always seems to ask him more personal questions than other heroes you know and you can't figure out why but you have a few ideas: to see his reaction, to get more information about his private life from him because he's one of the more secretive heroes, or to see his 'real' personality wondering if everything they see in public is all just an image.
"i'm sorry katsuki. is there anything i can do to make you feel a bit better?" you ask him and in less then ten seconds he's pinned you against the wall and is biting your bottom lip making you moan, giving him the opportunity to move his tongue into your mouth, intertwining your tongues and muffling any surprised noises that threaten to come out of you. you feel his large callus palms run all over your body as he pushes up your shirt and touches every single part of his skin he can get his hands on, leaving bruises and pretty marks to decorate your equally pretty body.
katsuki shoves his hand underneath your underwear, not bothering to take off your clothes and fingers you until you start screaming his name and your vision begins to go blurry.
"holy shit katsuki. feel's so good." he pumps two of his thick fingers inside of you and his ego soars as he not only feels how wet you are but hears it too as your cunt squelches and you clench around his fingers. he smirks as you come undone on his fingers chanting his name over and over again, your fists gripping onto his shirt tightly.
"this'll make me feel better," he grunts and tries to press his body closer to yours than it already was, your tits now completely pressed against him. "god shitty woman how oblivious can ya be? swear you're useless sometimes. a fucking dumbass." if you were someone else you might have taken offence to him calling you shitty woman or useless especially in the position you're currently in but you're use to him calling you names by now knowing he doesn't mean them negatively, if anything they're affectionate, most of the time he'll call people extras and you're glad he doesn't see you as an extra.
"oblivious?"
katsuki grits his teeth, "shut up," he grunts and you feel his hardened cock against your thigh, he slams his lips against yours again and starts kissing you even more furiously, if you didn't know better you'd say passionately but you don't think he'd ever kiss you passionately.
he sees your eyes glazed over with a daze on your face and smirks. his hand goes behind you to cups the curve of your ass then slaps with the sound echoing against the walls, making you whine. you feel the humidity that's resting on his palms and your whole body tingles imaging him using his quirk (controlled) on you.
"no one else has made ya feel this good have they sweetheart?" he asks gruffly already knowing the answer.
"no, no one else 'suki. no one has ever made me ever feel this good!" you reply honestly, tears starting to fill your waterline.
he knows you're being honest and if anything you're being more forgiving of your previous sexual encounters and talking more favourable about your past sexual partners than they deserve. "fuckin' criminal."
after what happened with katsuki you sat down with your friends and told them that you give them your consent to use you whenever. katsuki looked so much calmer after and his body looked more relaxed, less tension. you couldn't help but think that your other friends would be the same.
you were bashful the whole time while speaking, mumbling and looking away, your whole face felt like it were on fire but you were offering to help them all, you knew how stressful their work is and you wanted to help.
you want them, you wouldn't tell them that part though, neither did you ever have to think hard on your proposal.
all of them loved the idea, why wouldn't they? they're madly in love with you. over time all of them fell in love with you but none of them would ever make a move on you not willing to lose or jeopardise the friendship they have with you nor are they willing to make a move while knowing how the others feel about you either. you're sweet, and kind, and beautiful, and brilliant, and a hundred million more things that make you special in their eyes.
none of them thought they would ever get the chance to be with you in any such way, romantic or sexual, and they were more then content with being your friend, strictly platonic, but now they get to be your friend and they get to sleep with you, they're ecstatic.
hanta likes cockwarming with you, every single chance he gets he pulls you onto his lap and onto his cock without warning and puts on a movie to watch as he watches you squirm and try to keep still but it's so hard keeping still when the longest dick you've ever seen is inside of you and you feel it throbbing.
hanta sees you struggling and grins as you shift around and whimper quietly. you're biting your hand to try to keep silent but it's ineffective. "hush princesa, i'm trying to watch the film." he says teasingly, holding onto your plush waist to keep you from moving and lifts up your top, caressing your soft skin making you get goosebumps from the sensation of his cold rings touching you.
occasionally he'll lazily thrust up into you, making you squeak, he'll chuckle at the noises you make and get off on how needy you are for him. "you look so beautiful sitting on my lap mi amor," your heart flutters and your face heats up whenever he calls you affectionate names in his first language and especially when he calls you my love, "but aren't you suppose to be pleasing me? you seem very needy and demanding for someone who has offered their body to me." you shudder as he speaks, still with his hand caressing your body.
you look at him and pout, causing his grin to widen. "not my fault, you feel really good."
hanta's voice drops lower and becomes husky while he leans closer to you, "yeah?"
you nod your head and try to wrap your arms around him, admittedly unsuccessfully from the position you're currently in as you're facing away from him to 'watch' the movie with him, making hanta chuckle. "yeah," you reply.
hanta smirks as he looks down at you over your shoulder and tenderly strokes your arm, "beg me to move." with no hesitation you beg.
with everyone else they'll take what they want from you and get you to come as many times as they want (if they do want you to cum) without you having to beg but hanta is different, he'll make you cry and beg for him. no matter how horny he is he'll wait for you to become putty in his hands as you cry buried in the crook of his neck, trying to grind against him and wetting his shoulder with your tears, pleading for anything he gives you. he loves seeing you cry for him and plead for his cock.
you're always so pliant for him and he likes to make you even more pliant. as your reward for listening to him he grabs your wide hips and starts to move you up and down, harshly, making the ability to breathe leave your body momentarily at the sudden movement all while cooing at you, albeit condescendingly. "awe does that feel good princesa? you finding it hard to take it all?" he grins as you tip your head back and rests it on his shoulder, your moans getting louder, unable to respond and form a coherent sentence.
you feel like you feel him all the way in throat, a completely impossible thought of course but it's hard to think otherwise with each time he slams you back down and your pelvis meets his it's making you lose every braincell you have with how good you feel and how good he fills you up.
"open up," you compliantly open your mouth still in a daze and hanta spits in your mouth, grinning as he watches you swallow it without any prior audible command to do so already knowing from previous liaisons.
his pace changes, every so often becoming quicker with shallow thrusts than back to a regular pace with deeper thrusts just to tease you and make you light headed, not knowing what to expect next. his groans become more audible and he grips onto you tighter, his blunt nails making a crescent imprint on your hips. "s-shit hanta i can't, too much."
"i thought you were my good girl. you were begging for me only awhile ago." he smirks, starting to get close.
"i am! i am your good girl, promise! just 's a lot."
he chuckles at your obedience, you really are his good girl, made for him- and the others.
but he does wonder if you're that obedient with them as you are with him.
he purposefully slows down his pace and wraps one arm around your supple middle keeping you bouncing and tilts your chin up to look at him with his other hand before placing a gentle chaste kiss on your lips.
mina seizes every opportunity to lay lingering wet kisses down your neck all the way to your chest. you get goosebumps as you feel her breath against your skin and feel the sticky lipgloss left over from her lips.
mina never wears lipstick but she's nearly always seen wearing lipgloss and they're always flavoured ones, enjoying the look of how the sticky remnant remains on your skin after being transferred from her lips and how you seemingly unconsciously swipe your tongue out over your own lips afterwards to taste the flavour that remains.
whenever a man comes onto her apparently not understanding the word 'no' she comes straight to you afterwards so she can feel you up and touch your soft body and curves. you're so much better than anyone else and she's so glad that you let her touch you however and whenever she wants.
beforehand when someone was so persisted that it grossed her out she still would come to see you, you were roommates and very close friends after all. mina would complain about them and you would listen and bash them because how dare they keep being so disrespectful, unable to be take a hint or handle rejection.
the entire time when mina used to talk about them she'd think about how soft your lips looked, how good her hand would look wrapped around your throat and how she wants to go down on you so bad that you pull her hair and more importantly squeeze your thighs together in between her head.
"such a sweet little thing for me," she tells you and kisses your ankle. you whimper and she opens up your thighs wider for now, wanting to get a good look at your pretty pussy. mina flicks her tongue up against your pussy lips making a shiver run down your spine before her tongue enters into your soaking hole, moaning at your taste and your aroma, making her dizzy in the process. you can't help but squeal and shudder at the sensation as her eyes gleam with every new noise you make. she removes her tongue from inside of you, the sweet taste still lingering on her tongue. she flicks her tongue up again, curling two fingers back into you and starts sucking on your clit.
the pleasure builds up inside of you with every curl of her fingers, "that's a good girl, come for me," mina mumbles against your clit and you squeeze your thighs with mina's head between them, not being able to stop yourself as you're about to come again for the third time in an hour.
"oh fuck, min-" the last syllable of mina's name is silenced in an inaudible groan as the coil in your stomach snapped and you unravelled where she helped to ride out your orgasm still between your doughy thighs.
now she gets her wish whenever she wants as she's able to look up to see how your voluptuous body shakes. she gets to feel how soft and warm your thick thighs feel wrapped around her head.
as you calm down from another intense orgasm you move to look at mina, "what about you?" hinting that you desperately want to return the favour.
she can see the neediness in your eyes and giggles. "i can't right now sweet pea, i've got to go to work."
"already?"
mina giggles again, "i'll be back soon babes then we can carry on from where we left off, okay?" she smiles brightly and takes her leave feeling equalling as needy as you but who can blame her when she spent the last hour pleasuring you and feeling your plump body underneath hers and getting you see your gorgeous face scrunched up in pleasure. mina doesn't mind the needy feeling though as the look on your face is worth it as she leaves because she knows when she comes back home you'll make her feel just as good as she made you feel.
eijiro works nights a lot of the time which means typically you get woken up by him. this means most nights you sleep with only a nightie on or a baggy pyjama shirt foregoing underwear or pyjama bottoms so eijiro doesn't have to worry about fiddling with any layers and pulling them down. the only exemptions about the clothes are when it's particularly cold that night.
after work he'll want to feel your soft body squish in between his fingers as he presses down on your malleable skin, groping you wherever he can get his hands on and pumping his girthy cock in his other hand a couple times, wanting to be buried in that sweet cunt that he loves so much so it's no surprise to you to be woken up to his grunts and gentle thrusts.
whenever you do wake up he feels guilty. he knows you need, and like your sleep and he never intended to wake you up so he strokes the sides of your body and softly tells you to go back to bed while kissing your temple.
sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't, but no matter the outcome of trying to get you to go back to sleep your body always has the same reaction, mewls and moans leaving your body involuntarily and you becoming more and more wet with each thrust that it's dripping down to your thick thighs.
the times when you don't fall back to sleep you don't move much, very much a pillow princess in those moments but that's what eijiro prefers. he likes looking after you and treating you like the princess you are. he enjoys doing all the work so when you do wake up all you can do is rub your eyes sleepily and moan louder while he tries to shush you because no doubt someone has to be up in a few hours for patrol.
"p-please," you whine but you don't know what you're begging for. eijiro knows though as he pushes the remaining inches of his cock inside of you, you both hiss, and he slowly and deeply starts moving in you. you grab hold of his muscular forearms and whine about the pleasurable stretch.
you turn your head to the side so your neck is bare. he knows what you want more than your tired words can mumble out so he turns your neck further to the side than you did to keep you still and bites down, not hard enough to cause serious pain and break your skin but enough to hurt slightly and cause you to gasp, your mind momentarily going blank and your hips to jerk up.
before you started sleeping with eijiro you didn't know you liked the sensation of getting bitten so much until he bit you to keep himself quiet while at a very lively party. normally he wouldn't mind people hearing how good he makes you feel and vise versa but there was a minority of people at that party who were all trying to make a new hero commission and he didn't want to to draw attention to you or him with those people, knowing what the last commission did. even though you are just a civilian he wants to make sure they stay well away from you but still that wasn't enough to drag you into an empty room and fuck you until you couldn't stand after seeing how beautiful you looked that night.
ever since then biting became involved in your sex life. eijiro knew he liked biting people before you, he enjoys the surprised gasps and how bodies move but with you it's completely different, it's on a whole new level with how plump your body is, it's like heaven. no matter where he bites you there's always some part he can sink his teeth into making your body beautifully buck up uncontrollably. the whole experience and sensation making him groan and the noises you always make in bed are like no over- ethereal, just like the rest of you.
when he hears the slapping sound of your two bodies making contact get louder and louder and sees the creamy ring left over from each thrust he has to hold onto you tighter, gripping hold of your love handles, enough to leave bruises, and looking up at the ceiling not wanting to cum yet. he knows as soon as he looks down at your cute face or perfect body he'll immediately orgasm so to try and make himself last longer he'll look up.
that on top of the quicker pace and him touching your clit, just the way you like it, makes you come. you clench around him and moan words incomprehensibly causing him to come too as he feels you get tighter around him.
"gonna clean you up in a second baby just let me stay inside you for awhile." at this point you're both falling asleep, he wraps his muscular arms around you tighter and manhandles your chubby body so you're laying on top of him, your arm on his chest and your face in his neck, the whole time making sure his dick doesn't accidentally slip out of you. even though you're semi conscious you know that you're going to be sleeping like this all night, both of you are too tired to move, with your last moments of consciousness being your slow blinks that you use to gaze up at eijiro admiring how handsome he is, you like when his hair is down after showering because without it being styled to be spiky you can see his roots coming through, red mixing with his natural black, even now when he's half asleep and ready for bed he looks just as handsome as he does at any fancy hero event he attends. "you feel too good to get up and leave and anyway i've got to plug you full, breed you properly to make sure it sticks." he mumbles against your forehead half asleep, drifting off only a minute or so after.
out of everyone denki is the one to touch you the most, if no one else is kissing you he's taking the opportunity to kiss you and hold you all over. he's the most emotional and vulnerable when it comes to sex too. he feels safe around you, to let his carefree persona down and to be sensitive and vulnerable, just staying fully in the moment with you.
the first time you slept together, you kissed his chest all the way to his hips making his hips buck up. he had wanted you so bad for so long and now he finally had you.
originally, you had stroked his cock for the first time and you heard a string of moans and it immediately turned you on more than you already were. as he got closer to his release he said breathy, "please don't stop, this will probably be the only chance i ever get to touch you." it had shocked you not realising that he felt that way but you didn't stop, doing what you were told, and knowing you were going to talk to him after.
not long after, he came and you threw your arms around him, arms wrapped around his neck and clinging onto him. he was still catching his breath, "do you really think this was a one time thing denki? i told you all before that i want to do this." he blushed and squished your cheeks, a habit he had picked up on doing recently at the time, you swat his hands away and giggle, denki smiles.
denki is also the most possessive which surprised you, if you thought anyone would be possessive your guess would be katsuki but it's really denki. he gets jealous when you spend more time with the others than you do with him and will want your attention. it's even more noticeable when it comes to other people who aren't in the bakusquad.
if you ever smile too cheerfully at someone, laugh too loudly at someone's jokes or if someone flirts with you he gets extremely jealous, you never flirt back though, you have everything you need and sometimes you don't even realise they were flirting in the first place.
at times like that denki is the most vulnerable. as soon as you both get home he's kissing you tenderly and holding you like fragile treasured glass in his arms. most of the time he takes you to the bedroom and lays you on the bed but this time he pushes your head down gently and you fall to you knees carefully. "do you need a cushion babe?"
your heart warms at how considerate he is. you look up at him and shake your head, "i'm okay," you smile up at him and you don't miss the way his cheeks are dusted pink. unzipping his jeans and pulling them down, along with his boxers that already are wet with precum leaking from his cock, you kiss his thigh and stare at his .
denki holds onto your head as you part your lips and open your mouth, taking him in your mouth. you hollow your cheeks and grab a hold of his thighs. he keeps his hips still no matter how much he wants to rut inside your wonderful wet and warm mouth. when his hips do occasionally buck it makes you gag before he corrects himself and pushes back against the wall trying to control himself not to pound up into you, he wants you to control the pace. the moans that he makes as you take him further only spur you on as your pace gets quicker and your nose presses against his lean stomach momentarily before having to leave and gasp for air. denki may not be as thick as eijiro or as long as hanta but he's still big, more than people would assume, he's bigger than average (only if slightly.) denki's arm rests of his head while he takes deep breaths.
"fuck babe that was-" you cut him off as you take him in your mouth again and wrap your lips around him and you hollow your cheeks once again. his moans and groans become more frequent and you can tell that he's about to come.
his grip get's tighter while resting on your head and his groans get deeper. "gonna come, you swallow alright babe." you hum in confirmation, "shit, shit, shit," his eyebrows pinch together and his hot cum sprays in ropes at the back of your throat and you mourn not being able to properly fully taste him. denki lifts you up by your elbows and when you come face-to-face you kiss his cheek, he's not satisfied with that though and he passionately makes out with you not caring that he just came in your mouth and is holding onto your plush waist while grinning against your lips. "bedroom." he whispers in your ear making you shudder at the demanding tone he used, not often does he use it but whenever he does... well it makes your whole body tingle.
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darnell-la · 3 months ago
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can we get some nsfw of logan heavily infantilizing reader? i know he's a mean mean man and i want him to make us cry đŸ„ș just wanna be doted on but also fucked like a beast
note: Logan is a very nasty individual in this story. He’s degrading, calls the reader out of her name many times, fucks rough, is manipulative, possessive, and more

having Logan Howlett claim you are one of the best-given things that could happen.
———
How do you guys feel about a x men story with reader? Logan being rude Logan at first, then slowly shows small affection towards the reader. Jealousy and things of that sort. They soon hit it off, and after Logan starts acting rude again, because he’s scared of the love he grew for her. It’ll be a long story, but something to read at night. ALL ON WATTPAD! Comment below, please!
———
“You’re so fuckin’ childish, y/n, do you know that!? So fuckin’ childish!” Logan shouted at the girl as he placed her into his passenger seat. The man slammed the door in her face before walking around to the car.
Y/m scoffed as she crossed her arms, knowing she was wrong for what she’d done tonight, but at least she had fun.
Logan treats y/n like she has no idea what the world is like. Wade speaks to him, telling him he should take it easy because is his friend. Not Logan’s.
“Well, if I’m gonna stay in an apartment with two kids, I expect them to have manners and respect. If not, then I’m out of here,” Logan threatened a few months ago when he first got here.
Y/n had come home drunk out of her mind at three in the morning after Logan and Wade had been worried all night.
Her phone had died. She explained that to them, and Wade understood, but when she came through that door smiling, laughing, and giggling with the friend who dropped her off, it triggered Logan.
“I know pay the bills, and the apartment is his, but I’ll kick you the fuck out, kid,” Logan threatened as he got into the car and started it up, ready to get home and rest without stressing about y/n.
“I’m a grown woman, Logan. If I wanna go out and get drunk with my friends, I can!” Y/n turned towards the man just to yell before turning back towards the door, looking out of the window.
“What kinda fun is that, y/n? You’re a college student, you’ve got classes in the afternoon, you need to study, but instead, you’re out almost every weekend, pissy drunk and begging for a man to touch you,”
“What!? I don’t even go out with men! I reject them all,” y/n said, confused about why he even cared about her getting with anyone.
“Sure you don’t. Every time I pick you up or you walk through that door, you’re dressed sluttier. Every fucking time!” Logan yelled, hands groping the wheel as he drove through the city to head home.
“At this point, you’re just stressing yourself out. Let me live my life like I let you, okay? Fuck!” Y/n complained.
“So slutting around is living life now? God, you kids are fucking dumb,” Logan shook his head. “I don’t slut around!” Y/n basically screamed at the man.
“Lower your fucking tone when you talk to me, young lady!” Logan looked her way. The anger in his voice made her back up, trying to keep a straight face, but it was hard.
“Always fuckin’ yellin'. Can you ever shut the fuck up for once? Just do better in life and shut the fuck up — Grow up! Because you’re a-fucking-nnoying,” the man got out.
Y/n looked out of the window in silence, holding back her tears as the man continued.
“Be a fuckin’ lady, and respect yourself for once. For once!” He hit the wheel, making the girl jump. “Respect me!” The man hit the wheel again, but harder.
Y/n wiped a tear from her cheek quickly so he wouldn’t notice, but he did. Once he did, the man laughed to himself. “Unbelievable,” the man shook his head, disappointed in her.
“You can yell at me, but when I start yellin’ and tellin’ you what you look like, you start carrying. Fucking pathetic. Seriously!”
Logan didn’t mean to hurt the girl's feelings. He was just angry. He hated seeing her out and doing things he didn’t want her to do. Why can’t she just listen to him? Why does she need other people to make her happy when she has Wade and him at home.
The rest of the car ride was silent. Y/n wouldn’t sniff here and there, but low so she wouldn’t start Logan up again. She was embarrassed and disappointed in herself.
Right as Logan parked the car, y/n pulled on the handle to get out, but he had locked the door before she could.
“Looks y/n-“ Logan went to say, but y/n cut him off. “Let me out,” y/n said with a stern voice. “Y/n, just hear me out-“ he tried to say again. “Let me out!” She yelled, not even looking at the man.
“Hey!” Logan reached for her arm and grabbed it tightly. Y/n tried yanking herself away, but he was stronger. “Let me go!” Y/n yelled, only angering the man further. He had become obvious to the strength he had.
“Ow, Logan!” Y/n shouted at the man, but all he did was grip harder. “Stay still, y/n!” Logan demanded. “You're hurting me!” She finally said as tears streamed from her eyes.
The way she looked at the man in pain, not just from his grip, but more so from his words. Looking into his eyes, he realized he had gone too far.
“Y/n,” Logan said low as she fought the man, slapping his hand, but he wouldn’t let go. He only loosened his grip. “Let me go!” She could barely yell, only cry.
Logan shifted his body and lifted his other hand to cup her cheek. When he did, she tried shaking her head to get him off, but it wouldn’t leave.
“Please!” She cried, but Logan didn’t let her leave. All he did was let her arm go, only to push her seat back and hover over her quickly, the other hand still on her cheek.
“Baby, don’t cry,” Logan said, but she couldn’t stop. She sobbed as she weakly slapped Logan’s body, telling him to leave her alone, but that was the last thing he was going to do.
“Baby, look at him — It’s okay, just look at me,” Logan said as he placed the other hand on her other cheek, forcing her to look at him.
“I’m sorry, y/n, okay? I’m sorry,” Logan spoke. That was when y/n cried harder with no words. “Aw, baby,” Logan said, trying to wipe her tears away, but they kept rolling.
“All I wanted was for you to be safe, baby. That it. It’s dangerous out here. You can’t just be goin’ out every night, looking the way you do. You just can’t,” Logan said.
“If you wanna drink, we got it at the house. You know that. No more goin’ out, and you won’t look like this anymore,” he said, hoping to manipulate her into staying in the house, and in his sight.
“Hey, hey, calm down,” Logan said and kept repeating until she ducked in her cries. It took her a while, but she managed.
“Please understand that I want you safe, y/n. Do you understand that?” Logan asked. Y/n slowly nodded her head with a sniff, making him smile slightly.
“That’s it, baby. All I want is for my baby to be safe — No more goin’ out after tonight. Maybe with me, but I have to be by your side. It’s too dangerous,” he said.
“B-But my friends,” y/n sniffed. “They’ll be fine, baby. They love you and will understand. You want me to trust you and not be stressed out, right? You want me to be? I’m gettin’ old, and ion needa be stressin’ about my girl,” Logan said.
Y/n nodded her head, halfway understanding what he wanted, but not fully. She didn’t ask though. She just knew by the way he always acted that he wanted her in sight and safe with no funny business.
“Good, baby, good,” Logan said, looking into the girl's eyes as she looked back up at him, eyes bloody and eyelashes batting.
“You’re too pretty to be seen without me, baby, and you know that, don’t you? Don’t you, baby?” Logan asked, making her nod again.
“That's right, and you're sorry for disobeying me, right?” He asked. The way he spoke to her, made her feel like she’s actually done something wrong.
“S-Sorry,” she said low. A groan slipped past the man’s lips at her words and voice. She was too sweet to believe she was real.
“Ah huh, and are you gonna show me just how sorry you are?” He asked. Y/n surprisingly nodded quickly, wanting him to know that she meant nothing personal by the way she lived.
“Good girl — Now turn around for me,” Logan said. Her mind wasn’t honking straight, but she did as told, apologizing for her body rubbing on his as she did so. “It’s okay, baby - You’re all good,”
“I’m just a little angry, and you understand that, right? It’s acceptable to why I am, right, baby?” He asked her, making her him with a nod.
“Ah huh, and you’re gonna help me relax, right, baby?” He asked and she repeated what she had done before, but more shaky. “That right,”
Logan began unbuckling his belt, watching the girl underneath him shiver from how drunk she was, the cold air coming through the cracked window, her crying session, and the confusion of this situation.
“Never listenin’ to me, baby. I don’t like that,” Logan said before giving y/n a hard slap on her ass that was covered in her tight thin dress. A whine had slipped from her mouth, only making the man groan.
“Yeah, and I’m gonna bring all this anger right out on and into you, baby,” Logan said as he pulled himself out. “And guess what you’re gonna do. You’re gonna lay here, and take it like the disrespectful little slut you are,”
Y/n whined at his words, feeling shitty for not being respectful towards the older man, but she’ll soon understand to listen.
“Every time I pick you up or watch you walk through those doors, you’re fuckin’ soaked. I just know you’re out and about, waiting for some random man to offer his cock,”
“I know you’re whore enough to take it too, now ain’t you?” Logan asked. “N-No,” y/n shook her head with a whine as he pulled her dress up, revealing her dark wet patch.
“Sure you’re not, baby. You know the drunk sluts always say that, right? Until they’re caught being stuffed and fucked in some bar bathroom,”
Y/n whined again at his comment about what he thought of her as his fingers hooked around her pants. The man pulled his fingers back, causing the panties to rip perfectly.
“You wanna be treated like some dirty slut at the bar?” Logan asked as he put his cock in his hand. “No,” y/n truly spoke, but he didn’t believe her.
The man grabbed a handful of her hair and then pushed her head into the seat. “Are you sure, baby? Because you’re gonna spreading in my passenger seat just like them club whores,”
Before y/n could say anything, the man laughed into her, forcing his huge length through her walls, knowing she would barely be able to take him.
“Logan!” Y/n cried out loud, voice crazy as she gripped and clawed at the seats. “Nah uh, you shut the fuck up!” Logan spat through his teeth as he leaned over and into the girl's ear.
“Pussy’s so fuckin’ wet, I know you want this. You always do. Comin’ back from the fuckin’ bar all soaked and full of attitude. I just know you rub that shit in my face,”
“I fuckin’ know you come through those doors wanting me to fuck your drunk ass through my mattress,” the man snapped his hips hard.
“Oh yeah? Can't take it?” Logan asked as the young girl cried in pain and pleasure. “S-Sorry, sorry,” she quickly whined as she back arched.
“No, you’re fucking not. You’re only sayin’ it now because I’m fucking this cunt dumb,” Logan growled in the girl's ear as he tugged on her hair.
“Slutty fuckin’ cunt - Grippin’ me like she ain’t been fucked in the club already,” Logan said, making the girl shake her head.
“N-No,” she managed to say. “Oh yeah? You’re tellin’ me no man has been in this cunt at the club? Fuckin’ you silly in the bathroom as you pass out from the liquor?” Logan asked.
He had already known the answer, but he was angry. He wanted to get everything out. If he could smell how wet she was every weekend, he could smell a man on her, and thankfully for her, he never has.
“N-No,” y/n whined as she came around him without warning. He hadn’t cared that she soaked his leather seats. All he cared about was how could he could fuck he’d. Maybe if he fucked he’d be good enough, she wouldn’t dare leave the apartment again.
“That’s what I fuckin’ thought. You don’t let another man touch you. Never!” He pounded, knowing the wind out of her with every thrust.
“I swear, if you do, baby, ima kill him. Ima fuckin’ kill him then lock your ass in my room,” Logan threatened, only making y/n moan.
“My fuckin’ cunt — Mine! All fuckin’ mine and you know it. You’ve been known it, Bub, and because you wanted to play games, I’m gonna teach you what the fuck happens when you do,”
Logan took the seatbelt to the car and tied it around her wrist after pulling them man. The man soon continued his anger by slamming into her until she cried, begging him to stop.
He was rough, but y/n knew deep down that she deserved it. She was disrespectful and didn’t listen to him. He should get what he wants.
“You're mine, right, baby? All mine to use like those I want at the bar and club?” Logan asked as y/n could barely keep herself conscious. “Y-Yes,” was all she could get out.
“That’s my girl,”
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dearhargrove · 9 months ago
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Heyyy!! I have another eddie diaz request if that's okay? This time Eddie is planning to propose to reader and is a bit nervous but possibly gets chris involved holding a sign and turns around to eddie on one knee? Or they're at home getting ready for bed and he just proposes there and then as he can't think of a more perfect time. The first idea could be at home or the firehouse? All cute adorable and fluffy. Thank you!
Proposal
summary You're scared when Eddie calls you and tells you to urgently come to the firehouse - turns out there's no reason to be scared.
word count 1170
tags just pure fluff, Chris is a precious angel and I'll fight for him w my life
a/n unsure about this but here we go!! Thanks for the request <3
masterlist
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You're preparing dinner when your phone rings - the ringtone you'd picked specifically for Eddie.
“What's up?” You ask, putting him on speaker so you can keep your focus on the vegetables you're chopping.
“Can you come over? To the station?” He doesn't sound relaxed - as you'd expected - but instead he sounds stressed and nervous, speaking hushed and fast. “Uhm, yeah. What's going on, Eddie?”
You hear him clearing his throat but he doesn't answer your question, “Just please come over.” Now you were actually freaked out. Wasn't he in the middle of a shift? Why would he need you to come over? Chris was at school and all of your mutual friends were with him.
Before you can try getting him to talk and explain what's going on he hangs up, leaving you in the dark.
You shove the vegetables into a Tupperware box and store them in the fridge before grabbing your keys and hurrying to your car.
When you arrive about ten minutes later you almost forget to lock your car, already calling for Eddie. Noting how instead of the usual buzzing around of several people, the firehouse seemed empty.
“Eddie?” You call out again, walking between the firetrucks with your phone clutched in your hand as you'd forgotten your purse in the hurry.
Huffing when you can't find him you stop walking and look around again, “Eddie! I came as quickly as I could, where are you and what was so urgent?” You hope he's the one hearing you and not some colleague you'd never met because that would just be embarrassing.
He looks over the railing of the loft, a pinched expression but otherwise fine expression on his face. He didn't seem to be in pain nor in any haste - you were getting gradually more annoyed by the fact you had sped here, expecting some grand emergency.
“Come up,” he says and licks his lips, a habit of his when he is nervous. You squint suspiciously and walk up the stairs.
When you do, he stands at the end of the stairs, blocking your vision from the rest of the loft.
“Eddie? What the hell is going on?”
He swallows and you can see some sweat beading on his forehead and temple. Worriedly you put the back of your hand against his forehead, not feeling any high temperature which simply confuses you more. He stares basically blankly at you before finally moving again.
“Baby,” he starts and at any other time you would've immediately smiled and melted into a puddle of adoration for this man, but right now you're slightly pissed he'd stressed you for seemingly no reason.
“We've been together for almost two years.” He keeps going and you nod slowly. What is he getting at?
“I love you. More than anything else.” You smile and chuckle a bit, “Excluding Chris
” He looks down with a short laugh and nod, “He loves you too.”
“Eddie, this is super cute and wholesome but why did you want me to come here for that? Any near death experiences I should know about that prompted this?”
He bites his lip and shakes his head. He slowly and gently intertwines his hand with yours and kisses the back of yours, holding eye contact. It makes you smile and fluster, looking to the side with a shy smile.
“There's no one in this world I could imagine being a better woman to me than you. You complete me and Chris. And I want to
 I want to ask you something.”
It feels so surreal what he's hinting at that you don't believe your own intuition, simply wiping your eyes, “Eddie, don't make me cry I'll look like a panda,” you warn for a lack of a reaction, hoping your mascara at least survived the first few tears.
He chuckles and then slowly gets on one knee, your hand still cradled in his. You can't contain your sob when he kneels, making it clear what he's going to ask you.
Instead of asking the question he looks over his shoulder where Chris starts walking your way, a sign in his hands with that exact question on it. When Chris stands next to Eddie and looks at you with that adorable smile you can't help but sob, quickly reaching out to pull him into your arms and kiss the top of his head.
Catching Eddie's gaze you nod your head and bury further into Chris, “Yes, yes, a thousand times yes!”
The boy in your arms giggles and drops the sign to wrap his arms around your waist. “Told you, dad!” He calls and you laugh tearily.
“Yeah, you did, bud.” Eddie smiles fondly and wraps his arms around both of you. You see Buck motioning Chris to come to him, which he gladly does, considering Buck is still Christophers hero, and you hide your face behind a hand as Eddie slowly slides a ring onto your left hand.
There's an applause behind you from the rest of your closest friends, Chris sitting on Bucks hip as he giggles.
However you're focused entirely on the man in front of you, his hazel eyes teary as well when he kisses your knuckle and leans his forehead against yours.
“Te amo mucho, mi amor,” he mumbles against your forehead and kisses it, making you laugh happily. He wipes the last of your tears tenderly and you look at him with pure adoration.
“I love you so much.” He smiles and someone yells - you're pretty sure it's Buck because a smaller, high pitched voice echoes the same word - ‘kiss!’.
You shake your head in amusement but are caught off guard when Eddie surges forward and passionately and deeply kisses you, one hand holding you by your neck and the other still holding your left hand.
“Ew,” Chris says loud enough for everyone to burst into laughter and you and your now fiancĂ© to laugh as well and break the kiss.
“What?” He asks offended when Buck pinches his side (though he looks like he could very well be the one to make Chris voice their shared distaste for the PDA).
You smile at the people you considered family, especially when Bobby clears his throat and points to the already set table, “Dinner’s ready, so let's eat!”
You sit between Eddie and Chris, the former's hand never leaving your thigh, yours laying on top.
“I just realized this means we're gonna have to deal with their PDA every day now
” Buck mentions, looking genuinely scared.
Hen seemingly kicks his shin under the table because he yelps and flinches before pouting and raising his hands in mock surrender. And wow, you couldn't be happier.
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pinkaditty · 29 days ago
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HI i love your works sm ,,, and i really love the way you write it just brings out soemtnhign in me ,,, but hear me out on leo kurosagi angst where leo keeps insulting pc and pc just took it well until he said something sensitive (maybe sth ab the way she eats? or sth abt her face etc etc) and hurt pc's feelings and he didnt feel bad when pc cried , but when he saw pc going over to sho and sho giving him dirty looks he feels remorseful but he didnt want his pride to crack so he blamed pc , and then when pc started avouding him he started mocking her but in the inside it hurt him and his pride slightly , afterwards he found out he actually has genuine feelings for pc but denies it , until he found out pc is now his bff's gf WOW i NEED him humbled đŸ€—đŸ€—đŸ€—
Pavlov's Ghoul (Leo Kurosagi x Reader x Sho Haizono; Tokyo Debunker)
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hey anon this existing is UR FAULT. (ilysm ty 4 the idea) and i hope u don't mind that I added my own little twist 2 it... hehe! even if u didn't expect me 2 write anything u can't drop a fresh, juicy steak of an idea like this and expect me not 2 salivate and tear it 2 shreds via writing it out.
OMG also TYYYYYYY IM SOSO GLAD U LIKE MY WRITING YIPPEE!!!!!!!!! i hope this is up 2 ur standards anon
a/n: why does this exist? blame anon and my inner need 4 a bitchy boy 2 be humbled amen! also i feel like i've completed my tokyo debunker rite of passage... ive finally written leo angst... nirvana at last.
summary: leo gets fuckin pavloved LMAO! considered calling this "ecstasy" or something bc of the pill line but ohh my god "pavlov's ghoul" hit too hard i fear.
cw: this isn't dark imo but be warned as this is just a little bit crazy, the most insane kind of yearning ive ever written maybe. implied sexual encounters, multiple sexual innuendos, and some odd behavior. MINORS DNI AS PER USUALLLLLL!
Looking for Part 2? Click here!
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Sho's kind, reasonably so. Leo knows this. Sho also has an infinite store of deeply repressed anger. Leo also knows this. It's the reason he's in Vagastrom, after all. A deep, roiling anger that seems to eat at him if he doesn't have an appropriate outlet to balance his mood. That's why he's such a good cook, why he's so good at fighting, why he's got an excellent sense of balance and rides his bike smoother than anyone else he knew. He's using these things as outlets for his anger. It's not Leo's fault that the occasional outing to trick and deceive another sexually repressed rich old man for money is something else Sho seems to derive stress relief from. And it's not Leo's fault that Sho continues to stick around with him after those jobs are done. It's never been a problem for either of them, as far as he can tell. At least, there were no problems until Little Miss Inspector showed up.
Suddenly, Sho didn't want to lie anymore. Suddenly, Sho wanted to go as far as to address you with the proper honorifics, ask for your help with setting up his food truck, and even generally spend time with you outside of that. And for what? Some trembling, scared, pathetic girl that knew nothing of the world of anomalies prior to her curse? Some girl doomed to "die" in less than one year, no less? He couldn't understand the kindness Sho showed you. It made no sense, nor any difference. You'd be dead soon, so what did it matter?
It's got to the point where he's begun to randomly put you down with petty insults and biting remarks. They usually consist of things like "Oh my god, even preschoolers know Anomalous Biological Basics! Come on Inspector, is your head screwed on right? Not even the Captain is this stupid." or "You remember your ability is useless when we need it, right? You'd be nothing more than a burden on missions if you can't even control this power. " or even "God, you're such a basic loser. Can't you find something else to do with your free time instead hang around Sho like a lovesick puppy? You're starting to look like that dog that's always around Kagami." and worse insults. He gets the occasional sidelong disapproving glance from Alan or even a slight furrowed brow from Sho, but it didn't matter to Leo. So long as he could slowly plant seeds of doubt in his fellow ghouls and put you down to satisfy his ego, even an odd look was negligible.
He couldn't even stand looking at you. The uniform they'd chosen for you was awful, didn't even highlight your curves. He hated the way you styled your hair, and always thought he could totally do it better. The way you seemed so relaxed around other ghouls pissed him off, why couldn't he be good company? He found you repulsive, unable to resist glaring at you from the corner of his eye whenever he could. He had to get rid of you somehow. He would never admit to feeling threatened by you; instead choosing to focus all that energy into believing you were simply throwing a wrench into his plans to live an easy, get-away-with-anything university life.
It's all come to a head today. Leo thinks he's had enough of seeing you at the food truck after hours, chatting it up with Sho. It's like he can't even catch this guy alone anymore. Before he knows it, he's made a beeline for the truck. His brand new shoes scuff on the brick path in his rush, and eventually begin to stain green on the grass, his brisk stride tearing through the verdant lawn. He tries not to let his anger show on his face, but it's evident in his posture and pace. He forcefully sidles himself into the conversation, leaning on the service counter next to you, not even waiting for you to finish speaking before he pipes up. "Wow, here again, huh? And here I thought a basic bitch like you would know her place! That mouth of yours must be good for something if he keeps a chatterbox like you around."
The chill settles into the air almost immediately despite his candid tone and relaxed, smug smile. He's so focused on your reaction that he hardly notices the look Sho gives him, twisted with displeasure and confusion. He watches as you visibly falter, your lopsided smile fading into a barely-there frown. He stares, unrepentant, laughing internally. This was the reaction he wanted.
He turns towards Sho and raises an eyebrow at his look. "What? She can take it." Sho's expression visibly wavers, and Leo fully expects him to back down, as he usually does. But instead, Sho turns to you and his face grows pale. Leo rolls his eyes, assuming Sho is totally overreacting, and turns to you. He stiffens at your visible tears. Okay, totally not what he expected, but come on. This was the insult that made you cry?
Leo notices Sho is at your side in record speed, wrapping an arm around your shoulders, and gently drawing your hunched form away, giving Leo a harsh look. Leo simply scoffs. As far as he was concerned, your reaction was pathetic. It wasn't going to stop him from having any fun.
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This. Under no circumstances should this hurt. At all.
Leo had noticed you'd been avoiding him. You would slink away if he so much as entered the same room as you. You wouldn't look him in the eyes if he approached, keeping your expression impassive. Sometimes you'd just outright ignore him. It was beginning to become a bit of a nuisance. He couldn't properly mock you if you weren't there to witness it happening, or didn't give him the reaction he wanted. It was odd. When he faced these feelings head-on, it almost felt like he wanted your attention somehow, even if he didn't quite want it to feel like that. A nagging feeling told him that maybe he went too far with his latest insult. He didn't want to admit that, but something told him he did. It was in the way both you and Sho acted around him.
Sho was missing a lot of Leo's calls lately, sometimes not even bothering to call back. Leo partially understood, what with the food truck business booming and all, but he didn't appreciate being made to wait for his own best friend who's usually at his beck and call. Not to mention the flat, terse responses he would get from Sho more often than not nowadays. Leo knew Sho was miffed with him from last week's incident, but as far as Leo was concerned, things still ended in his favor. He hadn't seen you around Sho much anymore, which means he could go back to how things were. No more pesky little honor student to reign upon his days any longer! Sure, there was the biting underlying feeling that maybe he'd screwed things up, but one ride on the back of Sho's motorcycle, going wherever Leo wanted as per usual, and he was living the dream again. No way everything would change over a silly, insignificant insult.
For a short while, he begins to get bolder, openly mocking you when he does come across you. His originally surface-level remarks become rather personal, even using your eventual death as a way to tease you. From "You know, I'm surprised you haven't done anything to change up that unflattering look, considering you're dying soon. Ever considered dressing up a little? You might get some attention before you die." to "Hey, Little Miss Inspector! With the number of men you talk to around campus, I'm surprised nobody's written you off as a whore yet!", and worse, of course. He continues to get no such reaction out of you, and it frustrates him to no end. Why couldn't you just frown? Shrink away? Or even retort something just as scathing back to him? Your lack of entertainment towards his endless ridicule reduced his motivation, and slowly, it ended up dying off. Soon, he left you alone altogether, not talking to you unless necessary, mimicking your actions. In a way, some part of him hopes maybe this will be what gets your attention. Even if he can't quite admit to himself that your attention, regardless of whether it's positive or negative, is what he wants.
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It's late, but Vagastrom students don't go to bed until far later. And Leo needs a favor.
His crushing lack of success in garnering any sort of attention or reaction or rise from you had driven him to a point. He didn't want to apologize to you or anything, but this new habit of you ignoring him was beginning to stoke his displeasure. In his pondering, he remembered how easily Sho captured your gaze and wondered if maybe he'd have any idea of what Leo could do to at least put an end to this stalemate.
Leo's reluctance shows in the way he drags his feet on the path to Sho's room, less than eager to confront him for his opinion on something so shamelessly trivial. Why was he wasting his time with this anyway? Surprisingly, the lack of a solid answer to that question did not stop his trek. A twinge in his chest told him he knew exactly why he was "wasting his time".
In the month it had been since he'd made you cry, the nagging feeling had only gotten harsher. His mind kept flickering back to the shock of your tears and how he'd not bothered to consider it much further. An uncomfortable guilt had made itself known starting then. He never really expected you to cry; he just wanted a mild reaction. He wanted your eyes on him, flashing with anger, just for a moment. Your ire was a saccharine pill laced with ecstasy that he'd gladly crush with his teeth to speed up his high. Maybe it'd be too much to say he got off on it, but he enjoyed the way you used to roll your eyes at any comments from him a little more than he cared to admit. Now, he wouldn't even get that. It'd be rare for you to so much as make fleeting eye contact with him, not that something as small as that would be enough for Leo. Part of him was willing to accept that maybe, he'd gone too far. Maybe. But how else was he supposed to monopolize your attention when you give that out so freely? To his best friend, even?
He didn't know it was possible to covet something so terribly. He found himself wondering why he couldn't catch your attention in the same way as the other ghouls? In his quest for the same attention you gave so freely to the kinder, softer ghouls, he found another version of your attention. It was negative, but it was attention nonetheless. Your sweet, honeyed rage seemed to fill his cravings and then some, so he continued to devour it under the guise of "chasing you away" or "putting you down" or "satisfying his ego". In truth, for whatever reason, there was a rather bothersome and persistent envious longing, a covet, for your attention. Leo wants to vomit. A part of him denies it still, pushing his needless feelings to the back of his brain. He had something to do, and he ought to focus on that. What good would mere wallowing do?
He makes it to Sho's room and almost considers turning back. He stares at the door, his expression morphing into a complicated look. He shifted his feet, his slippers sliding against the floor. It was quite clear he really did not want to do this. At all. He sighs and grumbles indignantly, putting his head in his hands in an attempt to gather some courage. This couldn't be that hard, right? Just in, ask Sho a question, get an answer, then out. The only reason this was easier said than done was just because it could potentially show Leo was capable of feeling remorse, which would make this conversation leagues harder than it needed to be. He shakes his head and straightens up, preparing to knock, when he notices something.
Sho's room was... unusually quiet. Usually, Leo almost always heard some loud music or a cooking show running in the background, but he couldn't hear anything this time. Sho couldn't possibly be asleep. As late as it was, the only person who Leo knew for a fact could stay up past him was Sho, regardless of how much sleep he had gotten. There was no chance Sho was asleep. Believe it or not, Leo doesn't like to spy on Sho. But curiosity overwhelms him. What could he possibly be doing that would render the whole room in silence?
"Haxs," he whispers, listening closely.
The first thing he hears is the cling-clanging of Alan hard at work on a car in the garage. Not the sound he was meant to be focusing on. Then he hears endless jeering and loud insults shouted, though they're all muffled like they're underground. Another pit fight? Still, not the sound he's looking for. He sifts through the sounds he hears before he settles on the one coming directly from Sho's room.
Voices. Groaning, strained voices. The sound of wet skin against wet skin. Panting. Sho's panting, specifically. He could tell by the slight nasally tone of it.
Leo felt his face gradually warm. Christ, of course it'd be this he'd be up to. Leo muffles a laugh into the collar of his pajamas, keeping his hand clamped over his mouth as his body shook with mirth. When he finally calms down, he slinks off to the corner down the hall, and hides himself there, shamelessly still listening to it. Sho's a sly dog. Leo certainly didn't expect him to be getting up to anything this soon. He leans his body against the wall, crossing his arms and drumming his fingers on his arm, waiting for Sho to finish. He smirks to himself, as though enjoying the vocal show.
...
He had to admit, whoever he was with had gorgeous moans. He'd have to ask Sho if he'd be willing to pass this girl's number. He could use a couple things to get his mind off of you.
...
Okay, he had to stop listening to this now. He lifts his stigma and holds his hands over his ears for good measure, partially trying to hide the furious red blush across his face. As pretty as that girl's moans were, he was not going to listen to his best friend's climax. No thanks. He huffs out an impatient breath as his cheeks cool down, leaning his back against the wall, leaning his head back until it hit the wall with a dull thump. Now he just had to wait it out. He knew damn well Sho would never let a girl stay over. He'd never hear the end of it from yours truly, Leo.
Leo's right. It isn't long before he hears the door to Sho's room click, and hears murmured voices travel down the hall. He smirks, rushing down the hall in the opposite way, so it doesn't look like he was listening the whole time. He listens, waiting for a cue of some sort.
"Shame you have to go, you know." Sho's voice. Laced with relief, pleasure, and a thick tiredness. Leo's skin crawled. He could practically feel the smile in Sho's voice.
"It's not so bad." The girl responded with a light and playful tone, her voice seemingly much more put together than Sho's despite all that moaning. The voice sounded oddly familiar, but Leo brushed it off. Must be someone he shares classes with. "I've got things to do anyway. But it was nice to spend some time with you, Sho." Eagh. Leo internally hopes this girl isn't the type to get easily attached.
"...Yeah. Same to you. Goodnight."
"Goodnight."
Finally, he heard the girl's footsteps trailing down the hall, heading in his direction. Leo hurriedly pulls his phone out of his pocket, making sure the screen was bright as he flipped through the latest trends. He made a point of not looking up until he heard the footsteps nearing him.
He looks up, prepared for a simple glance, but ends up being rooted to the spot.
It was you. Of course, it was you. Who else would be taunting enough?
Despite himself, his gaze remains glued to you, his head turning as you walk past him. For a moment, Leo thinks you're just going to ignore him again. Then, suddenly, your gaze meets his in a flash, and he stiffens, almost out of fear. The way your eyebrows crease and the way your lips twitch downward almost makes him salivate. You were clearly displeased to see him. Even so, he notices you don't slow down, continuing your way down the hall, not bothering to crane your neck to look at him.
Leo remains rooted to the spot, watching your figure as you leave. His jaw hangs open slightly, his chest heaving with shocked breaths. His eyes are wide open, pools of gold reflecting your retreating form. His hand trembles as he holds his phone, the latest trends left neglected in the wake of a single mean-spirited glance from you. He feels his heart pound mercilessly in his chest, as though confirming what he'd tried so desperately to deny.
All at once, anger and arousal seem to grip him simultaneously. Anger at himself for feeling arousal from a mere negative glance from you. He couldn't possibly have craved your attention so viscerally he'd happily accept mere scraps. And yet here he was, a lap dog, watching you as you leave as though silently begging for another glance, another chance to watch your eyes burn with that familiar, delicious anger, another meal to satisfy his starved heart.
For a moment, he would have gladly followed you, and pestered you to death, just to irk you and become a willing victim of your wrath. Anything... just for that attention.
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a/n: wow. no stop why am i kind of in shock at the poetic lines i kinda think i did a great job! but 4 whatever reason it's always the writing i think was total shit that does actual numbers *sob*
aghhhh in any case. no i don't have an excuse 4 this. my requests are still technically closed. i just... couldn't help myself... so consider this a freebie. regardless though if u like my writing feel free 2 fill the fuck out of my inbox idnc i love hearing from y'all.
also TUMBLR KEEPS TURNING OFF MY REBLOGS!!!! GRAH!!!!!! tumblr hates me y'all they keep catching on2 me 4 writing porn :( so please if u really wanna show appreciation and tumblr won't let u reblog, leave a comment! those make me happy :)
anyways. usual note that i adore likes, comments, and tagged reblogs!! please tell me how much you like my writing, i love to hear it and it keeps me going! until next timeeeeeeee!
EDIT: I FORGOTTT QUICK EXPLAINATION: im assuming everyone knows pavlov's dog and the whole classical conditioning theory. this story is basically that mixed with the mere-exposure effect.
neutral stimulus: mc's presence
natural response: leo's arousal/excitement
response-producing stimulus: mc's anger
mere-exposure effect: psychological effect in which a like or dislike of things is developed merely due 2 familiarity.
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funhouse-mirror-barbie · 26 days ago
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How I would re-write Stella Goetia, Backstory + Season 1
Probably my most popular posts on this blog are about Stella from Helluva Boss. I like to talk about her because I think she had the potential to be a really nuanced character, and I really would’ve loved to see her and Stolas have a more complicated relationship.
So I’d like to talk about the direction I would’ve taken her characterization and story in.
I do need to stress that this is NOT a writing “fix-it” post. Canon Stella may be an evil bitch, but she’s MY evil bitch and I LOVE HER. I’ve already talked quite at length about how her character and conflict with Stolas being purely black and white is not a bad story decision, but to me is less interesting than having a grey or nuanced conflict.
I just want to go over a rough outline of what I would’ve done with her as a character. Just because it’s different, doesn’t mean it’s better or is “fixing” the canon story. I also am not trying to make Stella inherently more sympathetic/likable/or “woobify” her—this is just a ROUGH outline of what I’d do to flesh Stella out as a person, and ideas I’ve had for her character that would make her (and her relationships with Stolas and Via) more appealing to me personally.
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I just really wish Stella had gotten more depth, and wanted to talk about it.
(LONG) Rewrite Summary below!!!
While I think there’s also an interesting re-write where Stella and Stolas are not in an arranged marriage, and may explore this idea as well, this time around I am going to be sticking with the canon background that their marriage was arranged.
Instead of having Stella be an evil heartless spoiled child who strangles puppies, I would give her a very strict upbringing where from birth she was groomed to be the “perfect noblewoman and wife”—I would base her upbringing and the expectations placed on her on what was expected of Regency noblewomen.
Basically, Stella would be raised to be able to run the house/estate when Stolas was away, be accomplished in the “domestic arts” (hosting events such as parties and balls, being able to do embroidery and other hobbies “befitting” of her class, and being involved in charitable efforts). She would be taught to be quiet, graceful, courteous, and to always anticipate the needs of her husband.
Stella’s “true” personality as a young child would be boisterous, loud, and precocious. Stella loved playing outside, singing loudly, and dancing.
She would have gotten in trouble with her parents often due to this (“Dancing for fun is what the poor do, Darling. You should only dance to find a suitable husband”) and would be punished by her Father by his ordering the rest of the family and their staff to ignore Stella completely and act like she didn’t exist. This would usually result in Stella acting out even more to try and MAKE everyone pay attention to her, until she’d get too tired to continue and start acting “proper” (I.e. quiet, not speaking too loud or speaking out of turn, being obedient, etc.)
Her relationship with Andrealphus would have been strained, as he would have been the “golden child” while Stella would be the scapegoat. I’d also like to give Stella magic fire powers. Because honestly why does Andre get Ice Magic and Stolas get space magic and Stella is the same type of demon as them apparently and gets nothing??? Boring.
Maybe this is basic, but honestly I love characters with fire powers who have to learn to control them. As child, Stella would have difficulty controlling her fire abilities, and would be not be taught how to use or maintain her powers, but would be taught to suppress them.
As an aside—again, I’m not giving Stella a traumatic childhood to make her more likable and more pitiable. I have two reasons I’m giving her this backstory—1) I believe that even people with great parents still end up with some childhood trauma, because being alive and growing up *is* traumatic. And 2) I think that there’s a lot of pretty good evidence that ROYAL upbringings, and the expectations and restrictions that come with them, are especially traumatic in a very particular and very intense way.
Doesn’t mean that they’re not extremely privileged, but that privilege also doesn’t take away that trauma.
I think it’s very realistic for both Stella AND Stolas, as children of royalty and nobility, to have a lot of childhood trauma surrounding their upbringings, and that’s something I really want to explore in my rewrite—how they cope with their traumas and how it impacts their relationship and their ability to raise their daughter and navigate conflict.
By an older teen to young adult, she would have learned how to behave as a “perfect noblewoman”. This is when she would meet Stolas for the first time (with a a Chaperone of course).
There would be a little bit of time shortly before and after their marriage where they would have their “honeymoon” period—both Stella and Stolas were very infatuated with each other and mistook that infatuation for “true love”.
This time where they were extremely infatuated with each other would last about a year, after which they would slowly begin to realize that the idealized images they had of one another was false. They would start to argue more, have a harder time compromising etc. until they finally realized they fell out of love, and maybe were never in love in the first place.
Even though the two of them would have come to this realization, it would be separately, and due to their upbringings (where you don’t really talk about your feelings and push them down) they would NOT talk to each other about it.
This would be the first big crack in their relationship, and they would both have a lot of guilt over it.
I like the idea of the two of them really, really want to stay in love with each other, but after they get to TRULY know each other they just
never fully “click”. They realize they don’t have the same interests, they can’t really find anything to talk about, and they just. They don’t stay in love.
Stella would be very in denial about her true feelings after this turning point, and would still try to convince herself that she really loves Stolas. She would have a lot of deeply buried guilt over not loving him, and see it as a failure of her “duties” as his wife.
After this, they would find a way to keep their relationship would be cordial and respectful, but it would always tinged by an unspoken awkwardness. It would be almost business-like in nature, and they would start spending more and more time apart.
To cope with this lackluster relationship that they were both now stuck in, Stolas would throw himself fully into his duties (which I would want to show a little more of
seriously what does
what does he do??? What does he use the grimoire for????) and Stella would do the same—throwing herself into her duties as the lady of the house and a Goetia Princess.
Stella would host parties and balls, she’d make sure manor was always clean and orderly, she’d become a patron of the arts.
The basis of their relationship would become one of them sticking to the roles that were thrust upon them since birth.
Things WOULD change for the better though after Octavia’s birth.
Because for a while, Stolas and Stella would have something, someone, that brought them together, that they both loved and cared for dearly.
Something that Stella and Stolas would have spoken about before having Octavia is that they did NOT, under any circumstance, want to raise Via like they were raised.
As I already went over, both Stella and Stolas would have dealt with abuse and neglect growing up—Stolas’ abuse stems from his parents being LARGELY absent in his life and him being very neglected as a child, while Stella’s stems from her parents being extremely controlling and giving her very little, if any, freedom.
They would firmly agree on letting Via be her own person, on making time for her, on not putting too many expectations on her.
And, in this rewrite, I would not have them be abusive or neglectful parents. But I would have them be very flawed parents, whose own traumatic upbringings negatively affect their ability to raise Via.
I would want to explore Stella and Stolas fighting to break the cycle of abuse they went through, but still struggling because they don’t have a good frame of reference for what being a good parent looks like.
Stolas doesn’t realize that he’s not always giving Octavia all the time with him she needs, because in his eyes he’s spending tons of time with her—it doesn’t occur to him that he’s actually being neglectful towards her, because to him, spending any long amount of time with her is more than he ever got from his father. He’ll spend time with her, and talk to her, but not really LISTEN to what she’s saying she needs, and doesn’t understand why she doesn’t like the things she used to, or is mad at him for not taking more time for her.
Stella doesn’t realize she’s still being controlling or pushing her expectations onto Octavia by making passive aggressive comments suggesting she wear more “appropriate” or “feminine” clothing, or take up a “nicer” hobby like needlepoint and drop taxidermy. She gives Via the freedom to choose what she wants to do, but doesn’t fully SUPPORT those choices, and doesn’t understand why that’s so important, since in the end Octavia is still enjoying freedoms that Stella only dreamed of as a child.
Still, they manage to be a fairly functional and loving family towards Octavia. And Stolas and Stella maintain their cordial and business like relationship for Octavia’s sake, and to keep up appearances.
During Octavia’s teen years, when she’s 14-17, is when more cracks begin to show—Stella and Stolas have been keeping their relationship together, but it’s stagnating more and more. Stolas throws himself even more into his duties with the stars (or whatever) and Stella begins to become gradually more and more concerned and anxious about making sure her family maintains a “perfect” reputation among the other royals of hell.
Stella begins to throw more balls and parties for Hell’s charities (if this version of hell has banks, and police and prisons, they can have charitable organizations, okay.) As her and Stolas’s anniversary starts to get closer, she begins planning a HUGE ball for Hell’s nobility to celebrate. It’s hugely important to her.
While she’s doing all of this, Stolas is beginning to have an early-to-mid-life crisis. His work and duties that used to be engaging and fun are feeling more and more like a chore, his relationship with Stella has stagnated and is purely for show, he’s getting more and more anxious about Octavia approaching adulthood, and his whole life is beginning to feel more and more claustrophobic.
So. Stolas decides to do something wild, spontaneous, and very selfish, before he loses it. On a night where Stella is attending an Opera, and Via is spending the night with friends from school*, Stolas dresses in clothes he assumes “the common folk” would wear, and goes to shady bar in IMP city, with the goal of meeting someone to hook up with.
This is where Stolas meets Blitzþ. (Sorry, I’m. I’m not doing the whole “paid childhood friends for one day” background.)
They have what both assume will be a one night stand at Blitzþ’s place. It goes. MUCH better than either of them would have expected sex-wise. The two start meeting up more and more when they’re able to. Stolas begins to open up more to Blitzþ, but it stays VERY sexual—eventually Stolas comes clean about who he is and they start to hook up at Stolas’ place whenever Stella is out. Stolas is very much infatuated with Blitzþ (and the sex they have). Blitzþ thinks they’re having non-complicated fun.
During AAALLL of this is when Blitzþ learns about the Grimoire, and asks if he can “borrow” it for I.M.P. Stolas is impressed with Blitzþ’s confidence and drive, and agrees to let Blitzþ use it anytime, with the one exception being the night of the full moon. There is no full moon “deal” beyond the agreement that Blitzþ cannot accept clients on the full moon because Stolas needs the book back that night.
During all of this is ALSO when Stella begins to notice Stolas acting differently, he’s slightly more energetic, he’s spending less and less time in his study and the manor in general, he doesn’t look her in the eyes when they do have time to chat briefly. It’s odd, and she’s suspicious of SOMETHING going on but she’s not sure what.
Stolas DOES feel guilty about cheating on Stella, but justifies it by telling himself that they’re not in a “true” marriage, and it’s “just sex”, so he’s not really cheating on Stella.
The night of Stella and Stolas’s anniversary ball arrives. To Stella, everything goes as expected, and it’s a huge success.
During the ball, though, we get the same scene we get in the Circus—Blitzþ gets caught trying to sneak into Stolas’ room. Instead of the guards bringing him into the party, they call Stolas outside privately to deal with it (because why would the disrupt the party by dragging a party-crasher through the middle of a fancy ball?? I didn’t really understand why they did that in the og episode)
Stolas dismisses the guards, and we learn that Blitzþ has been sneaking in (with Stolas’ permission+ knowledge) to get the grimoire after the full moon when he and Stolas don’t have time to meet up in person. Like tonight.
Instead of just handing off the grimoire like usual, Stolas and BlitzĂž end up hooking up (mutually and wholly consensually). Stolas does not return to the party.
Stella is really concerned about how Stolas’ absence looks, especially at a ball she planned with so many high profile demon lords present, but she’s able to wave it off as Stolas feeling a little tired and retiring early, due to it being the day after his full moon duties and all.
Instead of returning to their room, that night, Stella sleeps in one of the many guest rooms. She doesn’t know where Stolas is, but she’s mad at him for leaving early without saying anything on such an important night, and is hoping not coming to their bed will send a message—she’s tired anyway and doesn’t want to get in a big fight before bed that will tire her out more.
The next morning she has tea in the garden with some close friends. And this is where we get the infamous “Sorry, I fucked your husband!” scene.
After this, well. Stella kinda loses her shit. She had been pushing down all of her negative feelings and thoughts and frustrations surrounding her life and relationship for YEARS, because in her mind, as long as she was able to maintain the facade of having a “perfect” life, it would be worth it.
And now in a moment she’s lost the thing that, after her daughter, mattered to her the most.
She essentially explodes in fury in a way Stolas has never seen before—they get in a huge argument—Stella’s fire powers come out and burn down the manor’s garden, things just really get out of hand.
So. What would follow would be most of what we see of Stella in season 1 of HB—now that that floodgate has been opened, she finds she’s struggling to control her feelings, she’s mad and sad ALL THE TIME, and she’s deeply deeply hurt in a way she didn’t know she could be.
She can’t show her face in society, she doesn’t know WHAT to say to Octavia, she can’t believe Stolas could be SO SELFISH after EVERYTHING she had done to make sure their family was in high standing—and she can’t push down her feelings anymore. She’s never been so furious in her entire life.
And so she contacts a hitman, Striker.
I really like the old fan theory that Stella hired Striker in a moment of irrationality and anger because of how hurt she was—obviously her hurt does not justify trying to have her husband MURDERED, but I like the idea that she called the hit because she was deeply hurt and unable to cope with those feelings—not because she just hates him to the core of his being and has for their entire marriage. Her anger would be a coping mechanism, if she’s so busy feeling furious she doesn’t have to actually sit with her feelings of betrayal and sadness and hurt.
From here, the rest of season one would play out like in canon, we don’t see Stella in person again, just the apparition of her in Ozzie’s.
I’m going to stop here because this post is already way too long, it it’ll help me to think more if I split it up.
If you read this far please tell me what you think! I think I’d like overall for Stella and Stolas’ relationship to mirror Blitzþ and Verosika’s, or maybe become a foil to it. From here we could honestly go either way—either Stella becomes a true villain, or she becomes an antagonist turned hesitant ally like Fizz, Ozzie, and Verosika.
I can see both being interesting, so maybe I’ll do a rewrite for both. We’ll see I guess.
*it weirds me the FUCK out that we don’t know anything about what Hell’s kids do, like I assume schools exist but ???anyway in this rewrite Stella and Stolas send Octavia to a fancy private school—cause the thought of her having NO friends or social circle makes me so sad)
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bad-and-drawn-that-way · 10 months ago
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vox more than anything fic ending with fluffy makeup sex is all i need :,))) LET ME HOLD THAT TV MAN!!!
I didn't end up adding the spice because it didn't flow naturally with how this came out. I do headcanon that Vox would 100% try to initiate spicy times during a makeup because he wouldn't know how to handle the emotional vulnerability in any other way. Homeboy hasn't exactly had any healthy fight aftermaths. Hope yall are ready for the fluffy pain <3
Tag List: @luzzbuzz
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More Than Anything Part 3 [Vox x Reader]
Part 1
Part 2
Part 2.5 (Vox POV)
Things at the Vee's Tower seemed relatively normal when you stepped into the lobby. It felt a little weird if anything. When Vox was upset, it could shut down the entire tower for days on end if it was something more serious. You didn't hear the hum of the overbearing generators that would keep things running during his fits and your worry only grew as you stepped into the elevator. You swallowed down your anxiety as you scanned your badge that would let you onto the elite floor where the penthouses of the Vee's were at the top.
Did something happen to Vox? Was he not here for some reason? Where would he go? Did he... just not care?
Anxiety swirled in your mind as the elevator doors slid open. You saw Velvette on the couch scrolling through her phone and the young overlord perked up when she saw you.
"Bout fucking time," she groaned as she pocketed her phone and got off the couch. "Do you have any idea what a pain in the ass it's been to babysit the man-child?" Velvette poked at your chest and you couldn't help but notice the dark circles under her eyes as she frowned at you. "You owe me for this."
Ninety percent of hell didn't see past Velvette's tough-as-nails exterior and if it hadn't been for the time you'd spent with the Vee's due to your relationship with Vox, you doubt you would have ever seen through the cracks in her demeanor either. For all her bark and bite, you could tell she cared for Vox and Valentino deeply. She wouldn't look so damn exhausted right now if she didn't.
"I'll make it up to you," you sigh in relief as you drop your bag to the side. "Where is he?"
To say you were less than pleased when you saw the door held shut by the smokey chains of Valentino's magic was an understatement. You were pissed. While you still felt a semblance of gratitude for the other Vee's keeping Vox from doing anything rash, you were going to tear them both a new one for keeping him caged like a fucking animal.
Velvette lifted her hands and got the cue to leave as you triggered your demon form and slashed Valentino's magic to wispy shreds. You yanked open the door and your eyes searched the room for Vox maniacally. There we no cameras and the windows had been covered with some sort of blockers. It looked like the Vee's had the sense to leave him with some comfort items and non-tech-involved things to pass the time, but the only technology you saw was some ancient Nokia-looking phone lying by his foot that he wouldn't be able to use to teleport out of the room.
"Vox?" You breathed as you saw him curled up in a corner with his screen buried against his knees.
His head whipped up and he breathed your name, only to curse as his body glitched hard from the prolonged stress.
"Y̶o̞u̎ ̞c̶a̷m̎e̞ ̞b̶a̞c̞k̎?̷," he asks, and your heart aches as you watch him flinch at the static in his voice.
"Oh hun, come here," you sigh as you get down on your knees and pull his screen towards you. You didn't know much about tech, but his personal repair sinner had shown you some of the basics to take care of Vox if anything ever got out of hand.
You reached around the back of his head and did a hard reset for him, holding him close to you as he went limp against your chest. When Vox powered back up, he flinched hard and pushed himself away from you, backing up with wide eyes and frantic breathing before he processed it was you who had been holding him and not Valentino.
"Woah! Easy," you gasp, not expecting the sudden movement. You look over him and instantly regret leaving him for as long as you had. "What... What happened?"
Vox's heart was pounding rapidly in his chest as flashes of Valentino's manipulative words flitted through his mind. The promises of affection if he crawled back. The venom in his voice as he told Vox you'd never love him again. The back and forth between gentle lies and cold hard truths. The one time he almost, almost caved into Valentino's whims.
With a shaky breath, Vox stomped down on as much of his weakness as he could and turned away from you. "It's not important."
"Like hell, it's not," you frowned as you reached toward him, only to pause as he flinched at the tone in your voice.
It was obvious there was a whole new can of worms to handle and most likely a moth to strangle. But you steady yourself and take a deep breath, deciding to take things one step at a time.
"I'm sorry for leaving," you start slowly as you sit properly on the floor with Vox. "I was scared and angry and processing everything. I needed space. But I should have at least texted you back or checked in. I didn't..." your voice wavers. "I didn't think that..."
"It's fine," Vox sighed. "I get it. What I don't get is why you're here. Why did you come back?"
"I was always going to come back," you say as you reach towards him slowly. Your heart ached to know he had genuinely started to believe you'd just abandon him, but given the pieces of the unsettling image of what happened while you were gone, you understood where it was coming from.
Vox looks at you and hesitates before he leans into your touch and lets you cup the side of his face. "I was angry and hurt and scared," you admit. "I needed time to process my feelings. I didn't want to say something I'd regret."
You shake your head and chuckle, "I'd say I should have known better, but this is our first big fight now that I think about it. It's uncharted territory for us both."
Vox was silent as he slowly reached up and took your hand. He let out a shaky breath as he looked down. "I've... any connection I've had with someone. It's never... survived this sort of thing. Once shit hits the fan, that tends to be the end of it. I thought... I thought you were gone for good."
"I won't let you think that ever again," you say as you cup the other side of his face with your free hand. You make him look at you, but you're gentle. "We'll talk about this. I'm in this for the long run, you dorky TV man."
"But I tricked you," Vox shook. His face flickered between heartbreak and frustration. "I stole your soul. You have no reason to fucking t͍̔͌r̞̰̈u͉̔̍sÌžÍ›ÌŻẗ̶̫ me."
"I love you," you say without hesitation. Vox's eyebrows furrow and he opens his mouth to retort, but you shake your head and stop him. "You did a bad thing. You did break my trust. But I know why you did it. Loving you doesn't mean I'll forgive you every time you cross a major boundary, but it does mean that I will do whatever it takes to worth through the bullshit together," you say softly.
Your thumb swipes over Vox's screen as you feel him tremble in your hold. "You're worth that effort to me, Vox."
"Why?" Vox asked as his eyes darted over your face as if the answer to his confusion would be found there. He didn't understand. How could you come back? How could you want to forgive him? How could you be here in front of him, looking like he was the one who hung the stars in the sky rather than the one who drew souls to their doom like a siren song on a screen?
You kiss his forehead and pull him close as he shakes harder in your arms. "W̞̻͝hÌŽÌ’Í–y̞̔̍?̝̔̕"
His claws dig into the back of your shirt as he hangs onto you like a lifeline. "I̔ ̷d̎o̶n̔'̶t̶.̎.̶.̔," Vox growls in frustration at the emotion that sticks in his throat. "I can't... I don't d̷e̎s̶e̷r̷v̎e̷ this."
"Because loving you has never been about what either of us deserves," you sigh as you kiss his head. "It's because despite everything, I know I could never replace you. So I'm willing to put in the work if you are."
A broken sob ripped itself from Vox's chest unwillingly as he held you tighter. Your heart broke, knowing this very well could be the first time anyone had actually tried to stick around after any of his fuck-ups. You held him close, rubbing his back as he worked through his emotions. You were there for him as he glitched and let out an anguished scream as everything he'd been holding in for so long finally poured out.
You don't know how long it is before he finally calms down. He looks up at you and you know his eyes would be bloodshot from the breakdown if that was how his screen functioned. He let out a deep breath and you smiled softly as he cupped your cheek.
"This isn't the first time I've thought you didn't belong down here," Vox admitted. His voice was hoarse from exhaustion and the pure angst session some cruel fucker decided would be entertaining to put him through. If he ever found that bitch, he'd wrangle her neck.
You laugh as you feel tears prick the corner of your eyes as you finally see the familiar spark in his eyes for the first time since you'd come back. "Nah, you know heaven wouldn't know the first thing about how to put up with my shit."
Vox barked out a tired laugh. "Damn right, they wouldn't. You're a menace."
"Yeah," you giggle as you press a kiss to his cheek. "But I'm your menace."
Vox reached up, his fingers tangling softly in your hair as he brought you in for a proper kiss. "Yeah. You're my menace. And I love you, more than anything."
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obito-in-disguise · 3 months ago
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| Bedtime fluff with the jjk men |
Featuring: Satoru Gojo, Geto Suguru, and Nanami Kento.
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Satoru
You sighed as you pushed through your front door, trudging your tired body across the foyer into the living room. Work was tough today and you wanted nothing more than to hop into bed right now, preferably with your cuddly boyfriend, Satoru.
“Evening baby, what took you so long?” Satoru asks from his spot on the living room couch, his six eyes notifying him of your presence before you even stepped into the house. “Work was shit today, plus the bus was 15 minutes late” Satoru sighs, tugging you to sit on the couch before pulling you into his arms. You basically melt into his touch, his comforting warmth making the stress dissipate from your body like melting snow.
“You know, my offer to pick you up from work everyday still stands” Satoru hums as he rests his chin on the top of your head. His statement causes you to scrunch up your face, “you already have a lot on your plate Toru, I wouldn’t want to burden you” “nonsense! It would be fun, it’ll be like carpooling.” He explains animatedly, already excited about the idea. “oh and Suguru can come too!” “I’m pretty sure Suguru would rather die Satoru, but sure” you chuckle at his enthusiasm before patting his paintbrush like hair.
“Great! Let’s get you to bed then” He announces, scooping you up as he strides to the bedroom with his long limbs. “Gosh Satoru! A little warning would be nice first” you playfully glare at him as you clutch his clothes for dear life, your heart beating from his sudden actions. He merely laughs at you as he reaches the bedroom, setting you down and heading into his closet to find you something to wear to sleep.
You use the opportunity to freshen up in the bathroom, emerging a few minutes later wrapped in a fluffy towel. “thanks toru” you mumble as you change into the shirt he laid out for you, giggling when you catch him sneaking peeks at you as you change. “stop staring perv” “hey! You can’t do that in front of me and expect me not to look” he scoffs as he grabs your arm and tugs you onto the bed, wrapping his long limbs around you like a snake. You try to shove him away a little but eventually give up when he only tightens his hold in response. “sleep princess, I’ll be here when you wake up” he whispers uncharacteristically softly, that was all the charge you needed to doze off into dreamland, Satoru following after you not long after.
Suguru
“Just try it” “no” “please sugu!” “no Y/N” he mocks your whiny tone as he chuckles, watching you hold out a face mask you’ve been begging him to try on with you for the past eight minutes. “I thought you loved me” you scoff, folding your arms. “you’re going to question my love for you over a face mask?” “yes! Because if you truly loved me then you would do it” he rolls his eyes before grabbing the face mask from you hands and examining it skeptically “fine but no pictures” “aw but you look so cute in face masks” he scoffs and moves to drop the facemask back but you laugh and quickly grab his hands “ok ok deal”.
“how long do we have to keep it on” Suguru asks exasperatedly, his fingers prodding at the itchy mask as you two now sit on the bed tangled in each other’s limbs. You swat at his fingers to prevent him from messing up the mask which earns you a warning glare. “Just a couple more hours” “WHAT” “I’m only kidding Sugu, just thirty minutes more” “like that’s any better” he mumbles throwing his head back onto the pillow dramatically. A few minutes go by and while you’ve been mindlessly scrolling through your phone, Suguru has been tossing and turning dramatically, hoping to get your attention and make you feel bad for putting him in this predicament.
“Stop being such a baby suguru” you roll your eyes as you watch him turn childishly for the umpteenth time. “wow that’s your response to your husband being in pain?”
“he’s not in pain” you dismiss him, dropping your phone and untangling yourself from him to head to the bathroom. Suguru sits up and watches you curiously “where are you going Y/N” “To get something to take your mind of the mask” your muffled voice replies as you emerge a few seconds with his hair oiling kit.
You sit on the bed once more, your back resting against the headboard “sit” you tell him gesturing to between your legs. He grins as he happily obliges “now this is what I’m talking about” you chuckle at his insistent hate for the face mask as you watch him settle between your legs, his head resting against your torso and his palms gripping your thighs.
You begin oiling and massaging his scalp causing him to let out little hums and noises of satisfaction, not even minutes later the noises stop and his body grows slack. You chuckle as you lean over his head to see him fast asleep, you wait a couple minutes more before pulling the facemask off his face and gently dislodging yourself to lie beside him. You hold him in your arms as you reach over to turn the bedside lamp off, kissing his forehead as you bid him goodnight in an unheard whisper.
Kento
You lay sprawled out on Nanami’s body, your chin propped up on his chest as you observed him read his book which was his usual night time routine. Occasionally, Kento would glance at you and reach his hand out to stroke your cheek softly, his little way of making sure you weren’t bored. He did this even though you assured him multiple times that his handsome face was more than enough to entertain you.
“Ken” “Yes my love?” “I just realized
.” Kento raises his eyebrows as you trail off, dropping his book to give you his undivided attention. “you realized what sweetheart?” “I just realized you’re a blondie” you muse, your hands reaching up to feel his soft blonde hair.
He stares at you for a few seconds before shaking his head, laughing softly “that’s not a bad thing is it love?” “absolutely not, its adorable” he hums, his fingers reaching out to stroke your soft cheek again “well as long as you find it redeeming then I’m more than happy to be a ‘blondie’” You chuckle as your fingers begin to card through his hair in a rhythm now, stroking the soft locks that are usually pushed back during the day “we should get you pink hairclips to match the aesthetic” “of course sweetheart, you can use my card”.
You huff out a laughter as you retract your hands from his hair, resting your cheek against his chest now as your exhaustion began to catch up on you. “that easily?” kento pats your head before putting a bookmark in the page he was reading, deciding he was done for the night “there isn’t a lot I wouldn’t do for you my love” he whispers softly as he pulls you closer, his hands moving down to draw gentle patterns on your back.
Your eyes flutter open as you quickly respond sleepily “I would do a lot for you too ken” He chuckles at your barely coherent sleep laced sentence, his hands moving to slip under your shirt to enable him skin to skin contact. You hum appreciatively as you fall more and more asleep, his hands always knowing exactly what to do to lull you to sleep. He places a soft kiss in your hair before reaching over to turn off the light. “Goodnight sweetheart”.
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Am I the only one that loves reading fluff bedtime scenarios before I go to bed? Anyways, here is some jjk bedtime fluff while I write part two of my Itachi arranged marriage series. I will definitely do more scenarios in the future with more characters, the next one might be angst like an argument because I'm addicted to hurt to comfort, please send help.
Enjoyed the story? Check out more of my other Jujutsu Kaisen fics and more stories! Requests are open! and don't forget to leave a like, comment or reblog pookie♡
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callmelola111 · 1 year ago
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loser!ellie ♡ dating app headcanons
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synopsis: totally sfw hc’s of loser!ellie (modern au) on dating apps, including a cute little 1st date scenario. basically just pure fluff !!!
      | 𓆣 | pairing & wc: ellie williams x reader. wc: 1.4k
a/n: never written headcanons before, crazy ass shit. idk if i did it exactly right but i think it will be an entertaining read no matter what. i’ve recently caved and downloaded hinge which is what inspired this---but there’s only like 40 gay bitches on there and that’s it (also like no mascs?? i’m attracted to any kind of non-man but still,,, the shortage is real y’all). ALSO let me know if this is something you’d like a nsfw/smut part 2 of. much loveeee ♡~ lola
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| ❀ | loser!ellie who took weeks of convincing from dina and jesse to finally download hinge after she wouldn’t shut up about how she’s “never beating the loser lesbian allegations”. truly she could have any girl she wants but just doesn’t know how to speak to them in real life. they were so fed up with her bullshit.
| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who only has like 3 pictures of her actual face so the rest of the photos on her hinge profile are just art pics and gay memes
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| ❀ | loser!ellie who had to beg dina for help writing all the little prompts just to reject all her ideas because she’d “never say something like that!”
| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who started getting so cocky as soon as those likes began to roll in. saying some shit like “ooo i have rizz” in the cringiest way possible. jesse just says it’s cause there’s a masc lesbian shortage and of course she flips him off in response.
| ❀ | loser!ellie whose cockiness immediately leaves her body when she realizes she has to go through the likes and accept/reject every girl. eventually she just gave up and stopped looking because it felt “too mean” and like “too much work”.
| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who SUCKS at responding to messages and likes after she lost all interest about 2 days into having the app. that is until she stumbled upon your profile

✄ - - - -   ♡   - - - - 
| ❀ | loser!ellie whose glued to her notifications after she matched with you on hinge. at this point you’re her fixation, and every other message besides yours are going unanswered. as soon as she works up the courage to ask for your number, and you oblige, she immediately deletes the app.
| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who stares at her screen for like 5 minutes straight at the first text message she plans to send you, even though it was literally just “hey, is this y/n?”. she even googled the difference in connotations between hi, hey, and hello. it’s safe to say the girl is straight up mental about you.
| ❀ | loser!ellie who gets more and more unhinged as y’all get better acquainted with each other through texts. eventually she's spamming you with updates about her day, instagram memes that she thinks are funny, and an occasional flirty message—but of course, she’s waiting for that first date to really test the romantic waters. like yes she’s obsessed with you, but to the extent where she’s so scared to screw things up so every little move she makes is with caution and regard to your feelings and boundaries. it’s honestly super sweet.
| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who eventually asked you on a first date after you sent like 3 different flirty memes to get the point across that you like her a lot and wanna be taken out for real. you definitely were sending her some shit like this

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| ❀ | loser!ellie who planned out a whole agenda for y’alls first date so it would be absolutely perfect. she refused to tell you where she was taking you or what you guys would be doing because she thought it would be better as a surprise. and although you were kinda stressing about what to wear and what to expect, the element of mystery was kind of endearing.
✄ - - - -   ♡   - - - - 
| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who pulls up to your house in her little beat up sedan that she had cleaned for like the first time ever just before she came and picked you up. there was still clearly some reminisce of her mess as seen on the stained seats and crumbs on the floor, but you didn’t mind—yours was just as bad (probably worse).
| ❀ | loser!ellie who took you out for sushi as the first stop on your date, to which she graciously paid for even with you fighting to put your card down on the table first. she looked so adorable with her little california roll, and even cuter when she accidentally got too much wasabi in a bite and was fiending for water while simultaneously trying to play it cool in front of you. you just laughed which immediately made her feel better about the whole thing. 
| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who then took you to your town’s expansive park to walk the dirt trails and just talk. neither of you had ever gotten along with someone so well, the conversation was absolutely effortless. you talked about all your interests, funny life stories, your fears, and so much more. ellie listened attentively with nods and affirmations throughout which made you feel so cared for, something most girls on dating apps could never do. you extended the courtesy back and ellie told you all about her own stuff, including her obsession with space, to which she pulled out her favorite book on the topic to show you. space had never really piqued your interest before, but when it was coming out of the freckled girl's mouth, it seemed like the coolest thing in the world.
| ❀ | loser!ellie who sat next to you on one of the park’s wooden benches. time had flown by and neither of you had realized until your head was resting on her shoulder as the sun set in front of you. the orange cast hit her auburn hair just right and it looked like she was practically glowing. you couldn’t help but stare at her beauty which she noticed and with a concerned look questioned if she had anything on her face. you informed ellie of the trance she had put you in and she blushed the color of your pink nails just before leaning in to give you the most tender, loving kiss you’d ever received.
| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who couldn’t stop kissing you once she started. your lips remained locked with hers for a solid 5 minutes, lips puffy and saliva exchanging, until the sound of a dog barking a few feet away broke the exchange. the energy had shifted in the best way possible and the both of you quickly opened up about how much you liked one another. one thing lead to another and suddenly ellie has out her pocket knife and is carving an E + R (reader) into the wood of the park bench. how lesbian of you guys ♡
| ❀ | loser!ellie who didn’t want the date to end and you were right there with her, so you somehow found yourselves in an empty parking lot at 9:00pm, drinking slurpees while she tried to teach you how to skate. it started off as a real attempt with her teaching you the basics like where to put your feet and the importance of bending your knees. after about 4 different falls onto the dirty asphalt you gave up on your genuine pursuits. discouraged, you sat right down on the board, knees up, before ellie gave you a push and you rolled across the lot. she was laughing her ass off and you were too until you hit a bump and tumbled off. 
| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who bolted into the CVS the parking lot belonged to and bought a bunch of unnecessary first aid items for the small cut on your knee. she came back out of the sliding doors and you died of laughter as she pulled out a box of peppa pig bandaids for your skating “injury”. ellie insisted you needed to be taken care of though, so you let her do her thing and she finished it off with a small peck to the cap of your knee and one on your forehead.
| ❀ | loser!ellie who spent the trip back to your place with one hand on the wheel and the other on your thigh, driving you absolutely wild. you almost had to remind yourself that this was just the first date.
| 𓆣 | loser!ellie who had been parked in your driveway for 10 minutes already but continued to stall your departure with more of her shenanigans. soon she ran out of things to say though and leaned over to kiss you goodbye. this goodbye turned into more and you ended up in her lap before the night was over. it wasn’t until your back hit the steering wheel making the car honk that you finally exited the vehicle. 
| ❀ | loser!ellie who waited for you to completely make it inside before she drove home, giving you a final little wave as you opened the front door. after she was back at her place she instantly texted you about date 2 and thanked you for the best night of her life. in her eyes, you were a keeper!
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✄ - - - -   masterlist   - - - -   ♡
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taglist...
@endureher @gold-dustwomxn @alexpritch @4rt3m1ss @robinismywifee @sophlovesbooks @97cityy
(taglist is for all callmelola111 works, if you'd like to be removed just kindly lmk)
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bevy-obeyme · 6 months ago
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what if
here me out on this when the demon bros are having private time MC can feel it because of the pacts, like he can just feel basically everything the demon bros do and they take advantage of the fact that MC can feel what they do (bottom male mc if you write for male mc :3)
This is a very intriguing ask tbh!! And thank you for your ungodly patience.
(I realise it took me a whole week to get this done and I apologise. Please forgive me my beautifully amazing fans.)
{{NSFW - Sexual themes (nothing too bad though!!)}}
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When pent up stress needs to be relieved
Lucifer
- Realistically, Lucifer would already know exactly the effect it would have on you. And he had to admit, it thrilled him.
- He would take advantage of it even if he wasn’t aroused - just to see you squirm. Just to see your trousers grow a tent or the desperate messages that would ping on his phone begging for him to stop.
- He’d even dare do it whilst you were hanging out with his brothers to remind you that you were his.
- Oh how the sadistic bastard loved this game.
Mammon
- He would definitely be embarrassed after he wanked off for you to come into his room looking all needy and worked up.
- How was he supposed to explain himself here??
- But then, seeing the look of desire, that flush on your cheeks - well, it overpowered his embarrassment.
- He was always a bit cautious afterwards not to jerk off afterwards - he didn’t want you getting into too much trouble or worse, Lucifer spotting and understanding what happened.
- But, he wouldn’t deny you if you came onto him when he was hard. Oh no. You were in your first man’s arms now.
Leviathan
- Now, after he found out, he was extremely embarrassed and shy. Hell, he ignored you for hours out of shame. Why did he think of you like that?! What right did a dirty otaku like him have?
- But, at the same time, it was nice to see his desire reciprocated. To see you look back at him with the same needy look.
- He probably wouldn’t take advantage of it, but he wouldn’t be against getting you worked up with your consent.
Satan
- The blond would definitely use this as an advantage too. Although much more subtly than Lucifer.
- For example, he’d work himself up a bit but by the time you’d question him, he’d act all coy and have no idea what you’re on about, that polite smile never quite reaching his eyes.
- Overstimulation would definitely be something you should expect. He was a master of pushing boundaries but never breaking them.
Asmodeus
- He would definitely be excited. What else did you expect of the literal Avatar of Lust?
- He’d be down to try anything - hell, he’d probably have you jerk him off just to get yourself hard too. Any idea you proposed just made Asmodeus libido skyrocket.
- Asmo would probably become a lot clingier and whinier too, trying to convince you not to go to student council meetings and spend time with him.
- You met harsh reprimands from Lucifer each time but damn was it worth it.
Beelzebub
- Now, when Beel learned about how he was affecting you he genuinely felt horrible.
- He would get worried and ask about if you were uncomfortable with the thought or not and apologise bashfully for his urges.
- Even despite your reassurances and that you liked it, he always made sure to ask your consent beforehand. He never wanted to take advantage of you and probably never will.
Belphegor
- The sleepy demon would probably be too tired most of the time to take advantage of his effect.
- But, if the occasional mood did strike up, he would make sure you were in public or doing something every time. He just had to torture you with his own arousal and send you pounding up the attic stairs to him.
- Your needy expression and pouts never failed to make him grin. Oh how he did love having a pact with such a powerless human.
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livelaughlovesubs · 10 months ago
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Ermermerm soooo
 can u plz do a lil fic where like, reader is a hardworking person and is like working a 9 to 5 job or wtv and one day they get yelled at by their boss and since reader is pissed they come home and takes the frustration out on Kunikida by fucking him HARD and goes on multiple rounds ermmmm
. THIS IS SO BAD IM SORRY ïœĄïŸŸ(ïŸŸÂŽĐ”ïœ€ïŸŸ)ïŸŸïœĄ
Ur fics r my girl dinner. Anywayz
 luv u nini!! Thx 4 putting up with me ;3
- 🎀
No no no, it’s alright bae, I don’t mind. Your ideas are always so good too, I’ll work on the other ones soon, it might take a while but.. oh well
Dom!reader x sub!Kunikida
Reader is gender neutral
Warning: pegging (you can read it as strap or not, it’s not mentioned)
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“Ugh, who does he think he is?!” You vented, seemingly annoyed. “Screaming at me like that, son of a bitch. Hey, kunikida, the fuck are you doing?” Your grip on his waist tightened, basically pinching him. He arched his back and yelped a little, “ah..! What are you- mhm, doing.” The male was riding you while you held him by the hips, giving him instructions and commands. “You are doing a horrible job, fuck it, I’ll do it.” Without giving him any warnings, you changed positions and got up, caussing him to fall onto his back.
“Ah, y/n?! I- UgH-Hngnn!” Kunikida gasped, now in the mating press with your arms forcing his legs to be raised to his chest. “You see I didn’t have a great day.” He moaned as he felt you deeper inside him, all thanks to this new position. “And I really don’t have any patience now.” Right before you started moving, his reached out to you, his shaking hands gently grabbed your arms. “P-please.. it’s the third round, I can’t do anymore
!”
That was the truth, he’s been riding you for a while now. Though just because that needy whore’s been pleased, doesn’t mean you were satisfied with his performance. “I’ve expected more from you.” You admitted with a cold gaze. Kunikida flinched as he saw your expression, shyly avoiding eye contact. He did kind of expect it, but it still surprised him when you suddenly started moving. Since he was stretched already due to the previous rounds, you were able to move faster from the start. Snapping your hips against his while panting slightly, using your anger as energy and his body as stress relief. “Ah-ahHhAa!” The Blondie cried out, tears rolling down his pretty face and decorating those flushed cheeks. His glasses were placed away on the nightstand, at a save distance. There were times were they broke during your sessions.
His body trembled with each thrust, he bit his lip to suppress those deliciously embarrassing moans he’d make. It was of no use though, because the pleasure was too overwhelming, so much that he was losing his mind. “What’s the problem, kunikida? You are normally so cool headed after all~” you teased him, not stopping with your relentless pounding. Fuck, you just loved that humiliated face of his. The way he shook underneath you, eyes pleading for your mercy, it was absolutely stunning. Like a drug to which you got addicted, and you couldn’t get enough of it.
“Ah- uHhh..! Y/n, y-y/n, MHmmm!” The man whimpered through clenched teeth, you always had to embarrass him like this and he was never able to get used to it. What happened at your work this time? One day he was definitely going to kill that boss of yours. Since when you get furious over them, in the end, he’s always the one to suffer. “What are you thinking about, getting distracted like this?” Your question pulled him out of his day dream, startling him a little. He wasn’t even able to respond before you considered it unnecessary and moved even rougher. Taking away from the speed and instead focusing on reaching deep inside him.
Kunikida could swear he saw stars, the way his entire body tingled each time you touched him was rendering him to a mess. He was getting closer to the edge, his legs wrapped around your waist to keep you closer. You felt a shiver down your spine, he was too cute when like this. “Ah.. ughh, y/n..!” The male groaned again, he used all his strength to whisper a warning but the words didn’t want to come out, “I’m- mhHmm! C-close..” it was just too much for him to handle, he was already sensitive from the previous rounds. It’s not his fault you feel so good.
You didn’t slow down, there was no need for it. Watching him all twitchy and messed up like this was your favourite thing to do after all. He clenched around you as he came, leaking his cum all over his belly. It dripped down his shaft in an erotic way, all the way to his hole, soaking his thighs and the bed. “Uh..HhhMM.!! Ga-gahhhHh..” a chocked out moan slipped from him, lasting until he finished his load. Some tears rolled down the sides of his face, or maybe it was sweat? He looked at you with trembling eyes, a hint of need and undeniable ecstasy present. “Good job.” You praised him, before turning him around onto his belly, licking your lips as you did. “Let’s keep doing that until you forget my name~” Those desperate eyes turned into one of fear and curiosity soon, he just pressed his face against the pillow as he let you do whatever you wanted. What a good little stress relief~
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(Tag: @nvllxiety)
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owatazumi · 1 year ago
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hellooo could i request something like the enhypen members meeting rikis gf for the first time? snd the reader is like a very girly girl iykwim? and the members actually expected a tomboy? thanksss đŸ«¶đŸ«¶đŸ«¶
that’s my girl
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featuring nishimura riki and reader genre fluff warnings cursing and swearing. a/n sorry for the long wait everyone, i’m kinda busy and really stressed recently but just to let you know, i’m working on your requests from time to time !! forgive me for the inactivity:((
riki and you were together for almost a year now and for your anniversary he wanted to invite you over to the dorm to do a sleepover party with him yet what all of his members didn’t expect was that you weren’t like they imagined you to be

“hey, i’m yn” you send heeseung and jake a sweet smile as you hold onto rikis hand shyly while the other boys giggle into themselves from the living room. heeseung motions you to come in as jake makes room for you to walk past him so you could enter the living room. “ignore the mess yn, the boys aren’t very good when it comes to keeping their stuff clean and tidy” heeseung scratches the back of his head in an embarrassed way while sunghoon whispers to sunoo and jungwon, eyeing you a few times which riki obviously noticed.
“keep your eyes to yourself sunghoon— she’s mine.” niki glares at sunghoon as warning to show him that he should be careful about how and why he looks at you since you were his pretty and adorable girlfriend after all and not sunghoons or anybody elses.
“hi sunghoon” you give him an adorable smile as you send sunghoon a wave which he returns with a kind smile before niki tugs on your hand to signal you to not do that after he had just basically checked you out. “i just said hello, niki
”
—
“that’s your girl?” jay looks over at niki with a raised eyebrow as the corner of his lips is raised up in an amused grin. niki sends jay a warning glare as your head lays on your boyfriends lap, peacefully slumbering.
“why, got a problem with that?” he asks with a low voice to not wake you up or disturb his sleeping beauty. the rest of the boys chuckle quietly as niki caresses your hair in a sweet manner, a blanket covering your bottom half since you were wearing a skirt that may lift up accidentally when you move.
“never expected you to be with such an innocent angel, rik” sunghoon chimes in as he puts down a plate of chips on the coffee table in front of the couch before he takes a seat beside sunoo. a smile creeps up onto your boyfriends face as he listens to his friends assumptions and ideas that they had of you, saying that they thought you might have been a tough girl but instead you were the complete opposite of what they made up.
“you two fit together though, don’t take it the wrong way,” sunghoon chuckles once again as he looks at your sleeping figure before looking back at niki.
“she seems sweet, don’t fuck it up, niki.” sunghoon adds with raised eyebrow, giving his younger friend a piece of advice on his new relationship. all niki did was roll his eyes playfully as he mumbles out a quiet “i won’t” while continuing to stroke the strands of hair that fell in front of your eyes behind your ear.
he was so in love with you and the other boys could definitely tell even from miles away. the night passed by really quickly as the boys were just chilling and talking and niki was taking care of you on his lap, making sure you don’t wake up because of the noise his members were making so he carries you to his room, lays you down on his bed and tugs you under the blanket comfortably.
“i love you, baby
”
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<33
@j-wyoung @lacieeeeee00
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jester089 · 1 year ago
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Hey, hey! Listen, I had an idea.
have a theory in my head that all the characters are alive in the real life, which means they have a chance to get out. so, what would happen if the reader, for example, died in the real life (for example, put on a headset and... I don't know, shot themself..?Like, their body died, but their consciousness managed to end up in the circus), which means that they couldn't refuse the digital circus, because they simply don't have a physical body in the real world.
how would characters react(everyone decided to run away, but I would like to see the reaction of kinger , jax and pomni) if they managed to find a way out (exit), and when they were about to leave, their s/o said that they can't leave it and they have to stay here forever... like, just stay alone in an unknown place forever. but the reader says that everything is fine, and they will love and remember them all all the time? I just want it look little angst ykđŸ«ą ( I prefer romantic)
I can't speak English good, so sorry for translating Ad I done this with translations
Thank you!!
Left behind
I was going to go to bed but then I saw this request. And I just can't keep my lovely readers waiting. Thank you for the request! And don't worry about your English it was perfectly legible. Plus my friend on discord have made me good at deciphering the most unreadable of things. So while reading your request I had some personal ideas/additions. So I'll, write what you wanted with a little of my ideas. You requested from me so I'm going to put my spin on it.
Kinger
You had grown close with Kinger bonding over both being borderline insane, but not abstracted. When a way out was found he didn't want to leave you behind. NO, he wouldn't leave you behind. You had to force him out of the digital realm so that he could live his life. And it hurt, being trapped in this hollow and ghostly version of the place you knew so well. But at least he could move on with his life. Even if it's without you. When the way out was found Caine disappeared for some unknown reason. So you are well and truly alone. No way of escaping, or dying. The only real way to get away from it all is to lose your mind to the point where you basically aren't human anymore. Kinger missed you back in the real world. He tried to move on but it was hard, knowing that your still trapped in that circus. So he went back to put the headset on again. If their's a set way out now he could visit you! But it didn't work. The pc, the vr goggles, the headset. They were gone... You were gone. So no one's coming to help you.
Jax
When the exit was found he tried so hard to just force you through it. (Like that scene from wreck it ralph where he tries to get Penelope out.) But as to be expected it didn't work. He was so stressed, his mind going over so many different outcomes. "If I leave will they still be here?", "I can't just leave them. After all we've been through. Fuck that. HOLY SHIT! I CAN CURSE AGAIN!!." Surprisingly he stayed with you. He stayed for around a month. But the ghost town of a circus clearly started to get to you two. And after that amount of time he started to care less and less. So he left you a note, then left. Didn't even say it to your face. And back in the real world he'll think about you every now and again. But he made it out of that hell. It's not his fault you didn't.
Pomni
Their is a 100% chance she's going to have a breakdown. She stayed determined to find an exit the entire time she was there. And you supported her every step of the way! And she did it! SHE FOUND AN EXIT! And exit... you can't use... She would freak out and be torn between leaving and staying. She gives you one more hug and kiss and promises she'll be back for you. She'll find a way to get you out from the outside! You hold out hope knowing your lovely is going to get you out of this place. You start writing down the days you've lived in a diary till your S/O gets you out. First 6 months are boring but you hold out hope. You know she'll get you out. You trust her. It's been a year. Maybe time works differently in the digital circus and the real world. Two Years now. Still not gonna give up on her cause she isn't going to give up on me!
ËąÊ°á”‰'Ëą ⁿᔒᔗ á¶œá”’á”â±âżá” ᔇᔃᶜᔏ
᎔˹ ËąÊ°á”‰
(Sorry this is so short. I couldn't come up with much and I'm really tired. But I feel like I made at least some 5/10 angst. Hope you enjoyed it!)
xoxo, Jester
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