#basically lives in his studio

[lock-my-feelings-in-a-jar]

Russ Ballard

[psychopomp-namine]

I finally saw that cooking poll... cxs should've been SWEEPING that poll hello?????

[foxmulderautism]

the wham! and george michael hyperfixation honestly could have faded away like a month ago if i didn’t keep finding this bitch and the other guy in the wild like it’s a challenge for me now how much of a collection can i build without buying online 😹 anyway freedom 12” single i am looking FOR YOU

[lollixp0p]

The Video (18+)

Pairing: Best friend!Hwang Hyunjin x afab!reader

Genre: Smut (MDNI), bit of feelings

Word count: just under 3k!

Warnings: Idol!au, subby!Hyunjin, slightly perv!reader, recording, (maybe a bit dub con because he doesn't mean to send it but reader watches it anyway), mommy kink, masturbation (both but separately), Hyunjin fantasizes about reader, reader fantasizes about Hyunjin, lmk if I missed anything!!

Summary: Hyunjin finally gets some alone time after weeks of hard work and decides to use his time to... relax. The next day he ends up sending you something on accident that sets off a big change in your lives, with or without either of you really realising.

Note: My first ever fic!! :3 Inspired by a video I saw on phub. (@cbini (Ems isn't on Tumblr rn she still wanted to be tagged so I hope it's ok), @comet-falls, @hyunsvngs, @mnwrld and @skz-hell lmao hello everyone, writing blog reveal!!😁 here's this fic I've mention to all of you as an anon<3 (depending on who you are I'm either ❄️anon, 🐾anon or sounding anon😳)). To anyone reading this please give me literally any feedback (comment, reblog, anything!), I want to know if this is good or not since it's my first fic🙏😣

Please do not under any circumstance copy, translate, or repost my works!

It's been exactly three weeks since Hyunjin's had any time for just himself, though it feels like months at this point.

Recently everyone's been running around like headless chickens and between vocal trainings, dance practices and the studio, there hasn't been much time to just relax and recharge. Preparing for a new album really is the busiest time of an idols life.

There hasn't even been time to see family or friends, which is common during busy spells like this, but always dissapointing to think about. Now even more so, with how much he's been wishing to spend time with you, one of his closest friends... who also happens to be his crush. Not that he'd ever let you know though, not in a very long time.

It feels almost like a blessing, getting back to the dorms from practice late in the evening and realising... he's got the place all for himself, at least until his roommates get back from the studio.

Changbin had messaged him earlier, telling him that they'd probably be there well past midnight, so there was no use waiting up for them. To him though, this was the very opposite of an issue. With that much free time, he'd definitely be able to... make himself comfortable, so to speak.

See, not having time to relax also means he'd basically had no time to get off. The best he'd been able to do had been quick little sessions barely once a week in the shower right before passing out on his bed from the exhaustion of working hard.

The realisation that he'd be able to do anything he wants during his time alone is enough to get his dick twitching in his jeans and he decides the shower can wait until later.

Hyunjin goes to his room and locks the door after himself even though he's alone, it's just become a habit after so many years living with his members. He sets his bag down next to his bed and thinks through his plan.

Hyunjin has a little secret, which is that he loves recording himself do dirty things that range from more vanilla to much less vanilla. Something about the thrill of being recorded even if no one will ever see it just... makes him so fucking horny.

He opens the camera of his phone, puts it to video mode and presses record. Moving his hand off the lense and setting it down where he normally sets it, on the carefully placed pile of books on his desk, he sits down on his bed.

"Hmm... I hope the angle's good... It's been so long since I've had time for this", Hyunjin sighs with a pout and brushes his hair out of his eyes. He knows the camera won't see it though because he's made sure the stand, his pile of books, is at a level that cuts off his head perfectly.

Hyunjins hands run down his body slowly and he exhales deeply, just loud enough to get picked up by his phone. Once they reach his jeans he unbuttons them, unzips the zipper, then pulls the jeans down just enough to expose his underwear. Hyunjin pulls his shirt up over his stomach to be held in place under his chin, rubs his hand over his bulge and hums.

It's been so long since the last time he's been able to take his time making himself feel good. It's almost embarrassing how quickly he's getting hard.

He takes his dick out his boxers and then spits on the palm of his right hand. It's dirty and wet but it just turns him on even more. He grabs his dick with the hand and slowly moves his fist up and down, to spread the saliva and precum all over his dick to make the slide easier and wetter but to also get himself to full hardness.

"A-ah, ohh... that's so good... Feels-fuck, feels so good", Hyunjin sighs. It really won't take him too long to cum, he just knows it. He's been pent up for far too long.

He tries to think of something to help his issue and immediately thinks of you, no matter how embarrassed or dirty it makes him feel.

When you first started showing up in the dirtiest corners of his mind he felt so ashamed. Now it doesn't matter to him anymore. You'll never find out so why feel bad?

He continues to move his hand on his dick while thinking of you. The last time the two of you had time to hang out together you'd worn the lowest cut shirt he'd ever seen on you. He had tried so hard to act normal around you but whenever you bent down he'd been able to see into your shirt.

"Haah, fuck..." , he squeezes himself a little harder at the memory. Everytime you moved he could see your bra poking out from the top, black and lacy. The entire time he'd been doing his best to not bust in his pants. Oh, what he'd give to be able to see your tits. They always looked so soft and they'd probably fit perfectly into his palms.

Whenever the both of you would hang out at yours, watching movies and just hanging out, you never bothered to wear a bra. Why would you? It is your house where you want to be as comfortable as possible.

The feeling of laying down on your couch watching a movie with you on top of him, in just a t-shirt, will end up driving him mad one day. Everytime he'd felt your nipples poking into him he'd almost moaned out loud.

"Hngh... Oh my god, please... m-mommy!", he lets out pathetically, moving his fist faster. God he just wants you to use him, to do anything you want to him. The thought makes him whine desperately.

One of the most common fantasies for him is you on top of him using him to get off, not caring about if he's close or not. You'd sit on his face and ride it until you cum. He could probably cum untouched like that. All he'd need was tasting you and seeing you cum, just for him.

All the sudden he remembers the phone recording him and he shudders. He imagines what your reaction would be to seeing him like this. Would you be disgusted or delighted? Would you tell him what to do and how to touch himself? Maybe you'd touch him... He hopes you would.

"Mommy... please touch me, aah- oh!", he runs his thumb over the head of his cock just right and his thighs twitch but he keeps them open, in perfect view to the camera.

Throwing his head back he imagines you riding him. You'd be so tight and wet around him. Maybe you'd tie his hands behind his back so he wouldn't be able to touch you... he'd really like that. You'd feel godly around him, Hyunjin thinks.

"Fuck, oh fuck! Mommy I'm-haah, I'm so close, please!", his dick twitches desperately. You're so gorgeous, to him you're the sexiest person he's ever seen. He feels himself getting so close that tears spring to his eyes.

"Ah- 'm gonna... mommy, gonna cum...!", he whines out long and loud. It takes Hyunjin two more strokes to let go and he cums the hardest he's cum in weeks. He doesn't even register whispering your name. Hyunjin leans back on his left hand and keeps stroking himself through it.

The feeling is overwhelming, so much so that his thighs start twitching pathetically and the tears in the corners of his eyes fall. He's getting incredibly overstimulated but he keeps going, wanting to keep enjoying the feeling, just a bit more.

He squeezes himself one last time and suddenly everything on him feels gross and dirty. He's just had the best orgasm in weeks so it's no surprise that he came a lot, everywhere. He even managed to get some on his chin.

"Fuuck... Did you-haah... did you enjoy that?", he chuckles to the phone. It takes a while for him to come down from the high, the twitchiness and the feeling of euphoria lingering in his body. Once he's capable of standing up again he stops the video.

With his body feeling like jelly, he takes off all his clothes, drops them into his hamper and prepares to shower, at last.

Hyunjin wakes up to his alarm the next day feeling more refreshed than he's felt in weeks. He shuts off the still ringing alarm and quickly gets up from his bed to get dressed and go eat breakfast.

Checking the calendar on his phone to make sure he knows his schedule for today, he makes a note of one thing; he'd have a lot of time alone at the dorms today too, since he's only got a dance practice and a recording session today, which obviously means 3racha will stay behind to stress about their songs while Hyunjin can return early. Maybe this time he should continue the latest piece of art he's been working on after he gets back?

Hyunjin gets through the day well enough.

After eating breakfast he messages you a "Good morning pretty <3 please remember to drink water!" like every morning when he has time for it. He gets to the practice room only five minutes late, which is a record this early in the morning, because usually he ends up sleeping in at least ten minutes (which makes Chan scold him for being such a heavy sleeper).

He does well at practice, even though he ends up a little exhausted. That's nothing new though, with how hard they always work to be the best they can be.

The rest of the members leave to take a break but Hyunjin decides to stay behind to film the solo choreography he's been working on for fun. Once he's happy with how it's turned out, it's time for him to go record his lines.

The recording session goes smoothly, without hundreds of retakes and everyone's satisfied with the result. Afterwards they decide to order some take-out, as a reward for a job well done... and also because they're all feeling too lazy to even think about going to the dorms to cook.

While eating Hyunjin finally realises to check his phone again. "Good morning, take care of yourself too!! :)" is your response to what he sent earlier. It's nothing more than a kind response but it makes him grin to himself like the fool in love he is.

"Yaaah!! Hyunjinnieee, what's making you smile so beautifully?", Changbin leans towards him with his signature flirting-with-Hyunjin grin, mouth half full of rice.

"It's nothing," Hyunjin responds back to him cheeks red, "and don't talk with your mouth full hyung... Do you not have any respect?"

Changbin decides to drop it in favor of eating more delicious food.

"Oh come on... we wanna know!!", Han pouts at him from his seat on the couch in the room. Hyunjin shoves another mouthful of food in his mouth to avoid the embarrassement of explaining how a single text messaged from you manages to make his heart beat out of his chest.

Once Hyunjin's done eating he's free to go back to the dorms and just like he suspected the rest of his dormmates stay behind to work some more, although they all whine at him to stay to explain the previous mystery. He declines and they all keep their sad puppydog eyes on him until he's out the door.

He keeps texting you during his ride, all the way to the dorms. Once he's in his room Hyunjin decides to just change into some clean clothes. He's too excited to talk to you and get to painting, he can wash up later.

He lays in his bed to keep texting you and at some point your conversation changes from how your day's been going to talking about dancing and he mentions how he just today filmed a new choreography bit he's made for fun.

❣️:

Can I see what you've been working on? :)

I'm sure it's really good, you always are!!

Jinnie:

Well... since you asked so nicely😉

[video sent]

Quickly sending the video Hyunjin exits out the messaging app, feeling so giddy he can't help but squirm around on his bed. He still can't believe someone like you could be interested in seeing him dance.

It might seem like a small thing for most but he feels himself turning red just thinking about the way you look at him while he talks about something so important to him. It makes the butterflies in his stomach every time you're near go crazy. It's so attentive, like you actually care and are interested in his interests... and maybe even...?

'No' , he thinks to himself. There's probably no way you could ever actually be interested in him, not in the same way he's interested in you at least.

He leaves his phone charging and finally gets out of bed to go to the kitchen for a cup of coffee. He'd need it if he wanted to stay up late to work on his newest art piece.

Hearing the familiar 'ping' notification of receiving a message makes you open your phone again and just like you thought, Hyunjin had sent you the video of his latest masterpiece of a choreography. Not waiting a second you press the video just to see.... Hyunjin take his hand off the camera and set the phone down on the desk in his room he draws on. He sits down on the edge of his bed and says something, you aren't really sure what, because the volume's too low. In confusion you turn it up more.

Hyunjin sighs and reaches up to move his hair out his face, probably. You can't see it though, because the camera cuts his face perfectly off frame. Suddenly his hands run down his body to the button on his jeans. He opens it and starts undoing the zipper next. You just look at the video in shock. 'He isn't about to... to take them off is he?', you think to yourself, just as he pulls the jeans down enough to expose his white boxers and then palms his bulge.

Should you stop watching? Keep watching? How long has it even been playing? How long does it keep playing? While you wonder this you almost miss Hyunjin pull his hard dick out of his underwear and spit on his palm and... Oh God...

You've now done something you can never take back. The downright sinful view of his cock is something you don't think you're ever going to be able to forget. How do you even face him after this? After watching him grasp his dick in his hand and pump it a couple of times to spread the spit and precum around.

You exit the video, panting and absolutely soaking through your underwear. Your other hand rushes to your face to feel your cheeks. They're burning and feel like you've been standing out in the sun for hours, when in reality all you've done is accidentally watch your best friend play with himself.

You struggle to decide what to do with the video and in the end save the video without much thinking, then delete the message of it and decide to notify him of his mistake. As long as he doesn't know you saved it, it should be fine, right?

It takes Hyunjin less than 10 minutes to make and get the coffee. He returns to his room humming the tune of a song he's had on repeat recently. Setting the coffee down on the desk and taking his phone off from the charger he notices new messages from you.

❣️:

Uhm...😕

Hyunjin, I don't think you meant to send that.

He looks at his screen confused. What did you mean by that? He...

Oh God.

Did he send the wrong video?

Frantically opening the video he sent earlier he sees himself, in video, move his hand off the phone camera and set it down the desk near his bed and sit down. Oh no...

"Hmm... I hope the angle's good... It's been so long since I've had time for this", video Hyunjin sighs and reaches up to move his hair from his eyes. His head may be out of frame but he clearly remembers pouting while saying this. He watches himself slowly unbutton and unzip his pants, adjusting them so that his boxers are clearly visible in frame. In the video his hand drifts towards his crotch slowly, teasingly.

He quickly exits the video and promptly shoves his head under his pillow and yells. He'd accidentally sent the wrong video while hurrying to get a cup of coffee. How could he have messed up this bad? In his panic, it takes him a moment to respond.

Jinnie:

Oh god

I'm so sorry!!

Please don't watch that!

❣️:

Don't worry!!!

I stopped watching the moment you started unzipping your pants😖

I saw nothing, promise!🙏 It's been deleted already!! 

Little does he know though, you'd kept the video. You're not really sure why, but subconciously your brain keeps screaming' to finish it later, of course'.

...

Fuck it, you don't think you can wait until later.

Taking a deep breath, you open your gallery to find the video he sent you. You hesitate for a second but press play anyway. You can feel how you're already soaking through your underwear but pay no mind to it yet.

You watch him do the things you've seen already, all the way until he spits in his hand... and you pause the video. 'Is it right to watch this? I mean, he didn't mean to even send it...', you think to yourself.

But the thought of seeing him touch himself, to hear him make the sweetest noises you could ever in your wildest dreams imagine him making drives you on.

Pressing play again you dip your fingers into your pants. You rub yourself over your underwear and oh my god... you can't believe the wetness you feel after less than a minute of watching the video. You focus on the phone you're holding in your other hand and finally move your fingers into your underwear to directly touch your pussy.

On your screen you see Hyunjin start to stroke himself faster, the head of his dick a dark pink, you can feel his desperation through the screen. Without thinking you move your fingers to your clit and start rubbing it in circles, aided by the wetness of your leaking pussy.

He moans out loud and even though you can't hear it through the fog in your head, you know he's desperate. You move your fingers down to your hole and dip two of them in. You're so wet you barely need to even stretch yourself out and then he does it.

"Hngh... Oh my god, please... m-mommy!"

You push your fingers deeper and your pussy lets out he lewdest squelch which in turn makes you close your eyes desperately in pleasure. 'Mommy? When he masturbates he calls out for mommy??', the thought makes you lose your mind. You think about what it would be like if he called you mommy in the throes of pleasure.

You want to make him follow every command you give him. The way he'd look up at you on his knees with you standing above him. Maybe you could make him suck on a strap? He'd look so ridiculously delicious with his mouth full, drool dripping down his cheeks.

You add another finger and start rubbing at your clit with your thumb at the same time. The feeling makes you whimper and imagine his hands on you, teaching him how to touch you perfectly. You're getting so close and you remember to focus your screen again.

Hyunjin looks absolutely disheveled. His dick is red and throbbing, you can tell he's getting close. His voice is another thing that gives him away. He's whiny and his voice keeps cracking every time he opens his mouth. Hyunjin bucks into his hand and moans.

"... mommy, gonna cum...!", he strokes himself twice more and then finally cums. You're so close it's maddening. All the sudden you hear him... whisper your name?

It makes you go off the edge and your entire body clenches and seizes while you silently cry out from all the pleasure you're feeling. Your walls suck in your fingers with how you're clenching around them. On the screen Hyunjin twitches violently, working himself through the end of his orgasm.

You pull your fingers out of yourself and slump down on your bed exhausted, but the last 20 seconds of the video that's now over haunts you. Did you hear him right?

You gather strength to pick up your phone again and rewind the video to the part where he cums and turn the volume almost all the way up. Admittedly you end up fixating on the way his dick looks and face twists in pleasure when he cums and then he says, or more like whisper your name. Your brain blanks.

"Fuuck... Did you-haah... did you enjoy that?", he chuckles to the phone, sits in place for a bit to properly come down and then gets up to stop the video.

You're wet, confused and you can feel your heart beat out of your chest. What do you do now? How can you ever face him normally after that... Does he feel the same way you do? Is he sure he didn't mean to send it?

It's all too much to think about, so you decide that instead of thinking about it you'll clean yourself up and... crawl into a hole where no one will ever find you. Probably. The only thing you know for sure is you definitely won't be sleeping tonight.

© lollixp0p 2024 | please do not under any circumstance copy, translate, or repost my works

[natalicss]

Like We Were In Paris

kwon ji-yong x american pop star!reader

part two

summary: you and ji-yong have been dating for a couple years, keeping it under the radar the entire time. you’re both invited to the gala de pièces juanes 2025, and it’s the first time you get to see him perform live

warnings: not proofread at all, celeb!reader, implied age gap (reader is like…mid twenties?), whole lot of fluff, basically ji-yong being a simp, taeyang & rosé being captains of the ship, use of y/n, i don’t use tumblr so bare with me while i figure this out. i tried to keep descriptions of the readers outfit vague so you could imagine it to your liking!

word count: 4.1K

nat’s notes: hey y’all! i was convinced into writing a g-dragon fic (by like 3 people). i’m kinda obsessed with this. i had so many ideas while writing it & so im kind of tempted to write more of these two, but i don’t know!! this is my first like… irl person x reader (ive only written one other fic on here lmao) & i am new to g-dragon, bigbang, all that so i kept it pretty current. to me these two are very dancing with our hands tied by taylor swift coded (or just reputation coded), i cant explain why it just makes sense. the divider right below is from enchanthings here on tumblr, and the other one later on….idk its for my wattpad LMAO. anyways i hope you enjoy, and im sorry in advance if you hate it. toodles!

You still remember the first time you met Ji-yong.

You were in need of some inspiration. Working on your fourth album, the intense gaze of your record label, your management, your fans, and your musically gifted peers was crushing you. It seemed to do more harm than good. For weeks, you stared at notebooks and computers and instruments. Your manager tried to get you with various song writers. Nothing worked. So, after some persuasion from your best friend (who knew you better than anyone, having been your best friend since you were kids), you decided to do a vacation. Just you and some required security (per compromise with your team). You decided to go to Seoul, having loved it in the few times you’ve passed through on a tour. The fans there were great; always warm and welcoming and always one of your loudest shows. The culture was breathtaking. It felt like the perfect opportunity.

Your team had found a studio for you to work in. You were only there for a few weeks, but they wanted some hope that you’d come back to America with something. It was week two when you met him. You were walking towards your studio, he was walking out of his. The two of you made eye contact, and you were instantly swarmed with warmth. You didn’t believe in love at first sight (neither did he, to be fair), but you started to question it as you walked past him.

From then on, each of you seemed nosy about the other. He asked his friends who the girl was in the other studio. “Oh! The American! That’s Y/N,” He recognized your name, and now your face. He hadn’t seen you outside of a red carpet or a concert venue photo, so he didn’t recognize you with little-to-no makeup and comfortable clothes. But once it clicked, it clicked. You had asked someone working at the studio about him. They mentioned his name, Kwon Ji-Yong, and you googled him that night in your rental house.

You knew about G-Dragon, the impact he had on K-Pop and the music industry. You had heard a song here and there, but you had never seen him. Not til that day in the studio.

It was a few days until you saw him again. Your schedules just missing each other. Then, one day, your producer was running freakishly late to your meeting time, and Ji-yong was walking out of his own studio. You stood there, more like paced there, tapping wildly on your phone trying to get in contact with your producer, whispering to yourself in frustration.

Ji-yong had the courage to speak up, say hello, and the rest is history. Stories for another time, maybe. 

Your friendship eventually blossomed into a relationship, defying all cliches of long distance and the terrors that often comes with it. It helped that he was on hiatus and you had became a professional of staying out of the public eye. You both wanted to keep what you had to yourself. Your teams did, too, but they got less strict as two months eventually became two years. It was on your terms now, when you'd let everyone know about your status, but neither of you had felt ready to let the world in on something so…yours. So peaceful, so effortless, so pure. It was easy, the two of you traveling between South Korea and America to spend time together, or going on vacations together, or just taking quiet retreats into each others homes. 

Nobody ever thought of it, either. There was no reason to. Unless they’d been in the studio that day, the media had no way to expect any crossover of America’s Princess and the King of K-Pop. The media would rather gossip about you in relationships with the usual Hollywood celebrities, some of whom were just friends, some you’d never met. Neither of you mind rumors, it kept the media out of your relationship and sometimes they were hilariously ridiculous. So, you let the press talk their talk. You and Ji-yong kept to yourselves, careful on your information you’d share with friends (it was easy for things to be leaked, these days).

When Ji-yong told you he was officially making his comeback to the industry, you were ecstatic for him. You knew how much he loved making music and performing. You also knew, though he’d never admit it, sometimes when he’d sneak to join you on tour, he got a bit jealous watching you sing and dance on stage. He’d watched you collab with numerous artists, tasting just about every genre you could before eventually finding your new sound. It made him sad, some nights, missing that glow you often had instead. But most nights? Most nights he was beaming from behind the stage, watching you do what you loved most. Most people sink in this world, but you? You swam, no, you effortlessly floated in the sea of fame. And it was obvious to anyone around you. Part of what he loved most about you was your creative drive, something he shared. It inspired him, more than you’d ever know. 

Ji-yong's comeback had been more than successful, as expected. Throughout your relationship, the two of you had fumbled with varying songs and styles for each other. Oftentimes more playful than not. You guys fueled each other in the best ways. You released your newest album in 2024, and you were about to start your world tour in the early months of 2025. Ji-yong would follow suit, his first solo album in years coming out soon and then starting his own tour. 

Both of you were wracked with nerves, spending days in rehearsals, wardrobe tests, photo shoots, traveling all over for various projects. It had been weeks since you’d seen each other. After the holidays you were swimming in press for your new tour. He had been equally busy, filming his show, performing at various shows. You both loved it. You loved your jobs and you loved each others jobs. But even you two would struggle on the days where it’d been long, exhausting, and mentally draining; wanting nothing more than each other’s warmth.

The Gala des Pièces Jaunes, a show that helps collect donations for charity in Paris, had invited both of you to perform, along with other various stars. Little did they know, they had invited the world's most popular secret couple. You had been ecstatic. Not only did you love the message the event had, but you loved the idea of sharing the stage with so many extremely talented artists. Including, your boyfriend. 

The night before the show, you had inconspicuously snuck your way towards Ji-yong’s room. You had wanted to get a hotel room together, but knew that you had to be careful with the amount of eyes on both of you this weekend. Still, that didn’t stop you from wondering around until you ended up at his door. With your special knock– each knock a syllable in your names –you waited patiently for him to open up the door to you. His eyes were sparkly, even in the shitty lighting. They always seemed to do that with you. 

“Finally,” He breathed, pulling you into the room quickly. You giggled as he used your body to shut the door, his arms around you tightly. You had seen each other, earlier in the day during rehearsals. Pretending like it was your first time meeting him and Taeyang was hell. Pretending you didn’t know their names, pretending Ji-yong didn’t pick out your outfit on FaceTime, and pretending you didn’t want to latch on to him and never let go. 

The only people who knew about you two were Young-bae, of course. He and Daesung had known about you for a while now, teasing their friend and bandmate for not telling them right away. The other person was Rosé, who’d been your friend for years and one of your closest friends in the celebrity world, both of you having blown up in popularity around the same time. Both of them seemed equally amused, watching you and Ji-yong try to act nonchalant around the other. Young-bae chuckling as Ji-yong watched your rehearsals in a stunned silence. He knew every song of yours by heart (even the ones from before he met you), and even when trying to act like he didn’t he could feel himself mouthing the words as he watched you and your dancers on the stage. Rosé would wink at you when she’d walk past you, and everytime you almost missed it cause you were too busy watching Ji-yong talking with his team.

But now, the two of you didn’t have to act. You couldn’t stop laughing in awe, Ji-yong smothering your face in feather-light kisses. You held on to him, your face turning pink as he continued his full-blown kiss attack. “I missed you, jagiya, so much.” He muttered against your skin. Finally, he pulled back to look over your face, pressing another kiss to your lips. You melted into his arms, your mind momentarily fuzzy. There was nothing else but him. His hands on your waist, his shirt clutched in your hands, his scent that had became your favorite. Him. Him. Him. It was always him. 

“I missed you more,” You whispered, running your fingers through his minty-colored hair. He closed his eyes softly, as if soaking in your touch. Your heart swelled, as it always seemed to do with him. You had never felt this way, not in any of your previous relationships. You had been positive for a while now, Ji-yong was it for you. “Are you excited?” You asked him, tilting your head in curiosity.

He slowly opened his eyes, meeting your soft expression. He loved how you looked at him. It was something you couldn’t hide, not even at rehearsals. He sighed, pulling you by your hand further into the hotel room. “Yes. Nervous, too.” He added. You nod in understanding, he had only performed a few times since the comeback. He loved it after, always, but the nerves had been hard to shake off, even still.

“I’m excited to see you,” You beam, still keeping your fingers interlocked. You hadn’t seen him live, not yet. You had been back in America finishing up your album and starting a press tour at the time, but you always called him right before he went on to give him a final good luck, and you always snuck onto a live stream to watch. 

He rolled his eyes shyly, leaning his head into your neck. “Young-bae is going to make so much fun of me.”

“Why?”

“Cause I’m more nervous for you to see my performance than I was at MAMA.” 

You laughed at that, bringing his face into your hands and looking at him. “You’re going to be amazing. More than amazing. You’re going to be perfect.” You reassure him, leaning in to kiss his lips softly. “And I am not afraid to bully Young-bae,” He laughed at this, throwing his head back slightly. He knew it was true, your friendship with Taeyang almost too sibling-like, to the point you two teased each other about everything. 

“Are you nervous at all?” He asks you, looking over your expression, as if he’s trying to find your answer in your gaze. He did this a lot, knowing you for so long he began to pick up on things, even before you did.

“I am, but only a little,” You decide finally. It was a short set, only a few songs to perform. You had picked your most popular hits and your newest single for the setlist. And your outfit was your favorite part, matching your dancers whilst still making sure you stood out and felt confident. “Oh! I have to tell you about this thing I saw.” You pulled out of his arms, suddenly distracted by something you wanted to tell him about when you were in your room. 

Ji-yong watched you quietly. His eyes filled with a lightness and admiration. He listened to you talk as you grabbed a water, waving your arms wildly to dramatize the story. He smiled, leaning against the couch in his room as he thought about how much he loved you. He loved everything about you. From the way you talked about your passions to the way you scrunched your face when you ate something you didn’t like. He loved the way you danced in the car when your favorite song came on. He loved the way you loved the people around you. He loved the way you waltzed into his heart like it was your home, and wrapped your arms around him like you were his home. You are his home, he’s sure of that. Even now, as you ramble into near nonsense about something he has no understanding of. He still watched you like you had been the most beautiful work of art he’d discovered. He was certain that was true.

Le Gala des Pièces was in full swing. Everything was going well, perfect, all of it. And you were backstage, getting your makeup touched up as you saw someone walk past your open door. You recognized him instantly, you always did. And part of you couldn’t let him go on stage without a final goodbye.  “I’ll be right back!” You pushed yourself out of your chair, rushing after him. You could see him walking through the hall, too busy with his own thoughts to notice you coming to grab his wrist.

Ji-yong felt your touch, his head moving so fast he swore he heard a crack. His eyes met yours instantly, then looked you over in surprise. He hadn’t seen your outfit yet. It complimented his, something he wasn’t sure if you had done on purpose or not. A black and red outfit, the red the exact same shade as his tie. As he looked you over, you could see the different emotions flicker on his face. Admiration, lust, maybe hunger, and love. He looked up at your face again, smiling, “Hi, Y/N,” His name feels unfamiliar on his tongue, now. Over the years, nicknames had become your normal. Another thing to add to the list of things you hated about pretending you didn’t know him.

Your mouth hung open for a moment as you looked at him. You hadn’t been sure if you’d see him before he went on, so you hadn’t exactly planned your choice of words. “I wanted to wish you luck,” You stuttered out, suddenly aware of how many eyes could be on the two of you.

Ji-yong’s eyes were laced with amusement, seeing your cheeks turned pink. “I have to grab something to drink, come with me?” He asked, playing it as cool and casual as humanly possible. You itched to reach for his hand, but kept to yourself as you followed him. 

As soon as you were in a dark corner, away from prying eyes, he was on you. The two of you pressed your lips together like perfect puzzle pieces. Your hands roamed his chest as his roamed your waist. You hummed happily, wishing this moment with him would never end. Adrenaline, nerves, excitement all were running high. From the show, from being around each other, from sneaking around. You felt his hands squeeze your hips, the two of you forcing yourselves to pull away. You smiled up at him, almost dizzy from him simply being in front of you. “Good luck,” You beamed.

“Is that how you wish everybody good luck?” He asks playfully. You rolled your eyes, smacking his chest as you adjusted yourselves. “I’ll see you as soon as I’m done,” He leans to kiss you again, “I love you,”

“I love you more,” You winked as he sauntered off towards where his team was waiting for him. You stayed back a moment, blushing wildly and hopping in place happily before rushing back to your own people.

You watched from backstage, wrapping yourself in a black robe to hide yourself as much as you could from the crew around you. You had passed Taeyang, who gave you a subtle handshake as he passed by for his cue. You watched in awe, seeing Ji-yong, no, G-Dragon on that stage. Seeing him do it all in person…it was ethereal. The way he moved through the stage and carried himself with this aura. He was almost mesmerizing, distracting you from the chaos backstage and your own nerves. It didn’t shock you, you’d known forever how talented he was. You’d seen videos of him from before you met, you’d seen him work for hours upon hours in studios, and you’d seen him on set for his music videos. But this was different. This was really him. This was what he was born to do, if destiny and fate were real. This was exactly that.

“Hey, pretty,” You turned your head to Rosé, Rosie, who only smiled knowingly. She linked her arm with yours, leaning into you. “You happy?”

“Happiest,” You answered, “He’s so good.”

“He is.” Rosie agreed. She giggled at your face. The two of you had met years ago, you had blown up in the music scene shortly after Blackpink. The two of you crossed paths at an event, not knowing anyone else there, and you two stuck by each others sides much like you were now. You two had been closest friends. When you told her about your first date with Ji-yong, she was ecstatic. She knew Ji-yong, and she knew that he’d be good to you. She wanted you to be happy, and that's what you were. Always when it came to Ji-yong, you were the happiest person she'd seen.

You watched the rest of his set. You smiled giddily as he and Taeyang performed together. You bit your thumb nail as you watched him move around the stage in the second outfit with the sparkling black jacket. Rosie nudging you every time she noticed you blush. 

When he was off the stage, he had found you waiting for him amidst the crowd of people. He smiled happily, reaching you without much thought about anyone else. His arms swooped you in, hugging you tightly. You laughed, hugging him back. “That was amazing!” You beamed. For a moment, the two of you forgot where you were. Forgetting the curious eyes who thought you barely knew each other. When your senses kicked in, he was quick to put you back at a friendly distance. Your gaze moved to Taeyang, “You guys are phenomenal!” You hugged Young-bae too, hoping that if you acted friendly with everyone it wouldn’t cause more suspicion. “Thank you,” Ji-yong muttered, suddenly shy again. He bowed quickly at you, trying to play it off. In moments, you were hearing your name called, and his own team was surrounding him. You smiled warmly, disappearing in the crowd of crew and stars. 

Ji-yong wanted to keep close to you. He wanted to wrap you up in his arms until the very moment you were on stage, but that was impossible. You were back in your greenroom, getting makeup and hair touched up, and then you were taking photos with crew members and doing more vocal warm ups. You were being whisked around every which way. He and Young-bae were staying close together, feeling the most comfortable with each other as they simply watched the show continue.

Young-bae was smiling to himself. He had been so happy for Ji-yong when he introduced you to him and Daesung. It was blatantly obvious to see how happy you made him. You made Ji-yong smile at every moment, you'd giggle at his jokes (even if Young-bae didn't think they were that funny), you would help him if you noticed his hesitation. You encouraged him. You built him up. You even started secretly learning Korean, calling Young-bae for help every now and again. The next time you visited Ji-yong, you had managed to say your first sentence in Korean, and it was actually good. You were this ray of sunshine. Anyone who knew the two of you knew that. He was honored to be in on your guys’s little secret. Otherwise, he’d feel cheated out of watching two people he cared about falling in love. 

Unfortunately, Ji-yong didn’t get a chance to see you before you were whisked away under the stage to make your entrance. Still, he watched quietly from backstage. He clasped his hands together, watching the crowd scream with anticipation as your intro started. Fog began to cover the stage, the lights flashing every which way with the music. Your dancers surrounded the area you’d rise from. Once you did, you immediately went into the first song, dancing on every note. The crowd was wild. Ji-yong smiled proudly. On stage you were someone else entirely. You were confident, you moved with ease and exact precision. Your body moved with your dancers, most you’ve known for years. Their hands grazing your hips as you all moved together in sync. Ji-yong never got jealous, knowing how these things worked. He was no stranger to any of it. 

He’d seen you perform, maybe a hundred times now, and yet it never got old. As the song transitioned to another popular track, the crowd somehow getting even louder, he thought about how you might’ve looked earlier. Standing in the same spot, only a short time ago. He could only assume you looked much like he did now. Body swaying to the familiar music, mouthing the words, eyes sparkling at him like he had hung the moon and the stars only for you. He wasn’t sure what he did to get so lucky.

He clapped as the crowd did. You were at the far end of the stage now, dancing with another male dancer to the third song. The song had been written for him, though not many people knew that other than you and him. A romantically charged song. It was one of his favorites. He remembered the day you showed it to him, all shy and quiet, which was unusual for you. You had told him you had a song to show him, wanting to release it as a single in the future. When you played it, you only stared at his face while he stared at the computer screen. He considered marrying you right there. 

As you performed your fourth and final song, he found his way to where you’d end up off stage. He played with his sleeves, smiling shyly as people greeted him as they passed by. He wanted to see you. No, he needed to see you. 

And he did. You came off the stage, glistening from glitter and sweat. You hugged your dancers and thanked them, high-fiving other members of your crew. As your eyes met his, he could see them light up. But you stayed put, not wanting to make another scene. He winked at you, moving in the direction of your greenroom.

It took you a couple minutes to get your micpack off and head towards your dressing room to change. Once you did, you smiled wide at the man waiting inside. “We did it!” You beamed as you jumped at him. He caught you easily, swinging you loosely in his arms as you pressed your lips against his. It wasn’t rushed or adrenaline-filled like before. This was softer, still full of energy, but only relief, love, and pure joy. “We fucking nailed it, baby,” You said as you looked up at him. He swore he might die from the way you love him.

“You were beautiful,” He hummed, leaning into your hair. He hummed, squeezing you tighter. “I love you. So fucking much.”

You closed your eyes, taking in the moment as best as you could. There was no place on this planet you loved more than being in his embrace. You could be anywhere, at any time, anything could be happening, and all you’d want is him. That’s all you’d ever need, The lazy mornings in your LA home where you’d surprise him with breakfast in bed. The romantic nights in Seoul where he’d take you out to dinner at your favorite place. The bustling mornings when one of you had a meeting to get to. One of you having a mouth full of toast trying to run out the door, only to scramble back to give the other a kiss. Late nights in studios, falling asleep in random spots as you tried to come up with new lyrics and beats. Your favorites were the quiet nights, the two of you tangled in bed sheets as he stared at each other, talking about whatever came to mind as one of you played with the others hair, or traced shapes on bare skin. Gentle kisses passed back and forth. Life was perfect, and he was perfect. 

“I love you, Ji,” You whispered, kissing him again. He hummed into it, smiling. You looked him over appreciatively, fiddling with his outfit. “I need to change, wanna pick my outfit out for me?” You asked, raising a brow. His eyes flicked with mischief as he looked back at the rack of clothes you had. He looked back at you, pulling you back into him again.

[jisungiesvzz]

Give Into Me

Hyunjin x fem!reader

Warnings: angst (if u squint), kissing, kind of public touching (no one sees), possibility of being heard (you were), fingering (f receiving), oral (f receiving), getting interrupted/caught, hint of Minsung’s whatevership :)

Word Count: 2.5k (ish)

P.S. first time writing smth like this so bear with me

Y’all already know the drill: this isn’t proofread so lmk if I’ve missed any warnings or need to fix any grammar/spellings ;)

Versions: Hyunjin // Han // Jeongin //

—————

It was close to midnight when you and the other members finally arrived back at the dorms after a long day at the studio. Once you stepped inside the dorm, you took off your shoes and immediately  headed down the hallway to your room. You stopped in your tracks and turned around as you heard Felix call out to you.

“Y/n-ah, are you gonna hang out here with us?”

“Uh, let me put on some lounge clothes first.” You replied, sounding more drained than you intended.

Felix nodded and you continued your short journey to your room. You quickly changed into a grey hoodie and black sweatpants and slid your favorite white fluffy socks on. 

You exited your room and sat down on the edge of the empty couch, seeing that the other members hadn’t finished changing yet. 

A couple minutes went by as you absentmindedly scrolled through a random social media app on your phone. Your scrolling was interrupted when someone slumped onto the cushion next to you. You averted your eyes from your phone to see that Hyunjin was now taking up the rest of the couch. His eyes were glued on you.

“You do realize that seven more people have to sit here right?” You let out a soft giggle.

Hyunjin playfully rolled his eyes, “well they aren’t here right now.”

You gave him a look and he sighed sitting up and resting his head on your shoulder. Your heart swarmed with butterflies at his close proximity.

You’ve always had lingering feelings for Hyunijn but never said anything in fear of messing up your friendship and the groups dynamic.

“What are you watching?”

“Uh- I’m just scrolling through random stuff,” you stammered.

Hyunjin let out a soft laugh at your sudden nervousness.

“Let me see,” he said, leaning impossibly closer to you.

One of his legs was now draping over your lap and his head was basically on your chest. His hand touched yours as he turned your phone towards him slightly. Your mind was in a whole other world as you tried to register all of the sudden physical contact. You were immediately brought back to reality as you felt him staring at you. 

The moment you made eye contact with Hyunjin, he spoke in a low whisper. 

“Do I make you nervous?”

The question caught you off guard as it was so straight forward. You started tripping over your words.

“W-what? Why would you think t-that?”

Hyunjin smirks and leans closer to your face, leaving barely any space between your lips. His eyes flicker to your lips as he places his hand on your chest.

“Your heart beat’s giving you away,” he murmured.

You swallowed hard not knowing what to do. Your heart was beating a thousand miles per hour and you had the sudden urge to smash your lips against his.

Hyunjin seemed to have read your mind because within seconds, he had his lips attached to yours in a slow, sensual kiss. You reciprocated the kiss, melting into in his touch when he moved his hand to your cheek to deepen the kiss. He swiped his tongue along your bottom lip, asking for permission and you open your mouth to let him in. 

Before the kiss could get any more heated, you heard one of the members doors open. You hesitantly pulled back from the kiss but Hyunjin chased after your lips. 

You could hear Felix and Seungmin’s voices getting closer to the living room. You placed your hand on Hyunjin’s chest, applying some pressure to break him from your lips.

“Jinnie… they’re gonna see us,” you said out of breath.

Hyunjin stayed close to your face for a moment before untangling from you, a mischievous smirk on his face. 

“Oh my god today wiped me out,” Felix said exhausted as he slumped down on the opposite end of the couch. Seungmin sat down in the middle only letting out a quiet sigh of relief as he made contact with the couch.

The air around you felt thick as Hyunjin was still shoulder to shoulder with you. There was tension in the air between you and him but the other two didn’t seem to notice. You shuffled in your seat which caught Felix’s attention.

“Y/n-ah you alright? You seem kinda off ever since we got back,” Felix inquired.

“Uh… y-yeah no, like you said, you know today was… a lot,” you stuttered out, doing your best not to seem flustered.

You looked at Seungmin who had his eyebrow raised and was side-eyeing you and Hyunjin. Felix just hummed in acknowledgment, trying to put the pieces together but eventually shrugged off any suspicions. 

You heard the doors to the other members rooms opening and closing and soon enough, everyone came piling in.

 Jisung and Minho laid down next to each other by your feet on the floor. Bangchan had his back on the couch between Felix’s legs and was back hugging Jeongin while Changbin had wedged himself between Hyunjin and Seungmin.

“Yah! Binnie hyung could you be ANY closer?” Seungmin complained.

“You’re the one in the middle of the couch!” Changbin complained back.

“Yah! Both of you be quiet!” Bangchan intervened.

The two boys went back and forth until Bangchan grabbed a pillow and threw it at them.

“Seungmin scoot over and be quiet.”

Seungmin obliged and scooted over, giving Changbin a massive side-eye.

During the chaos, Jeongin had picked up the TV remote and picked out a movie to watch. The TV was at a steady volume as everyone settled down. Hyunjin had put a blanket over the two of you and laid his head on your chest again.

He was acting so innocent after basically swallowing you whole not too long ago.

How is he so calm?

Your heart skipped a beat as you felt a hand on your thigh. You looked down and saw the outline of Hyunjins hand under the blanket. You felt him massage your thigh and you shuffled from your position on the couch accidentally bumping Jisung on the ground. He turned around to look up at you and you whispered a strained ‘sorry’. He shrugged and turned back around, luckily not noticing where Hyunjin’s hand was placed.

He continued riding his hand up your thigh and stopped at your clothed heat, applying slight pressure. You leaned your head back, breath hitching as you bit your lip, biting back a whimper. Your head shot back up as you felt a hand wrap lightly around your ankle.

You looked down to see Jisung looking up at you again.

“Are you okay?” He mouthed, his boba eyes softening.

You nodded your head, giving the best reassuring smile you could. His eyes narrowed as if he wanted to believe you but Minho pulled his attention away by rolling on top of him and burying his face in Jisung’s neck. 

Hyunjin started rubbing circles on your clit and you cleared your throat.

“Guys I’m actually gonna head off to bed, I’m dozing off,” you said more calmly than you expected.

“What? Already?” Jeongin whined.

“One more episode? Pleasee.” Felix begged.

You removed Hyunjin’s hand from your heat and sighed, “I really want to but I can’t keep my eyes open.”

You got up from the couch, hoping that you sounded believable. You dashed to your room and shut the door letting out a relieved sigh when you heard the door click shut. You were so unbelievably aroused and shocked by what just happened. 

Hyunjin kissed me. And touched me. Fuck.

You went to go lay down in your bed when you heard your door creak open and click shut again. You already knew who it was.

You stood in the middle of the room, back to the door. Slow footsteps approached you as your breathing sped up. The footsteps stopped directly behind you and you could feel his breath on your neck.

Two hands grabbed your waist and spun you around. You gasped when you were met face to face with Hyunjin. His lips so close to yours, his gaze was desperate, filled with want and need.

“Why’d you run off?” he whispered.

“I uh- I couldn’t… you-”

You were cut off when he cupped your cheeks and pulled you into a hot and hungry kiss. You hesitantly melted into him once more and wrapped your hands around his biceps. He walked you back into the bed, never faltering from the kiss until you were laying flat on the bed.

His hands traveled across your body. He tugged at the bottom of your shirt asking for permission. You nodded your head and he wasted no time in pulling it over your head.

He started kissing and sucking on your neck and you let out a soft moan at the sensation. He left unmistakable marks along your neck. His kisses traveled down between your breasts and down to your stomach where he tugged at the waistband of your pajama pants.

“Wait- Hyunjin,” you whimpered.

Hyunjin kept kissing your stomach, lingering above your waistband. His fingers traced under your waistband and wrapped around your underwear. 

He looked up at you through his eyelashes, “Use your words, sweetheart.”

“The m-members are in the other room,” you said breathlessly.

Hyunjin removed his hand from your underwear and dragged his hands back up to your stomach, holding your waist. He leaned back up to your face leaving quick kitten licks up your body. 

He leaned down to your ear grazing his lips against it, “So what?”

You opened your mouth to respond but Hyunijn suddenly pulled your pants off causing you to gasp. He sucked at your neck again ripping a moan from your throat and you quickly covered your mouth with your hand. He pulled your hand away from your mouth.

“Jinnie they’re g-gonna hear,” you let out a muffled moan from biting your lip.

“Let them,” he said a bit quiet from his face being buried in your neck, “You know you like this.”

He broke away from your neck and took off his shirt, throwing it to a corner of the room. He kissed you passionately as his hands traveled down to your underwear again and pushed them aside. You gasped into his mouth at the feeling of the cool air on your heat. His fingers slid up and down your wet folds and he smirked into the kiss.

“You’re already so wet for me.”

He pushed two fingers into you causing you to moan into the kiss and he took the opportunity to  slide his tongue into your mouth. The kiss became wet and sloppy as he began pumping his fingers in and out of you at a steady but agonizing pace.

“Mmmh, faster Jinnie,” you whined, placing your hands on his chest and arching your hips into his hand. He placed his hand on your abdomen forcing your hips back down so he was in complete control. He dragged his lips down to your heat and sucked on your clit. You moaned loudly at the sensations he was giving you, hands flying to his hair to hold onto something - anything. You felt the familiar knot in your stomach and your walls started clenching around his fingers. He knew you were close and sucked your clit harder, pumping his fingers into you faster and deeper hitting your g-spot effortlessly. 

“Aah- I’m close Jinnie, I’m gonna-” your words became incoherent as Hyunjin flicked your clit with his tongue bringing you over the edge and releasing around his fingers. He detached from your clit, massaging it with his thumb to ride out your high. Hyunjin leaned back up to your face and attached his lips to yours, allowing his tongue to slip into your mouth. You moaned into his mouth again, tasting yourself on his lips and tongue.

You broke away from the kiss breathless, your forehead pressing against his.

 “That was… so fucking hot,” Hyunjin teased, looking down at your pussy that was leaking some of your release.

“Can I touch you?” you pleaded, a sudden urge to feel him washing over you as you eye the rock hard bulge in his pants. Hyunjin was taken aback by your sudden confidence boost but melted into you when you placed your hand on his bulge, slowly massaging it.

“Fuck Y/n, d-don’t do that,” he tried muffling his whimpers by kissing you but you knew the effect you were starting to have on him. He continued slowly kissing you as you undid his belt with one hand and massaging is dick in the other. 

You jumped when you heard a knock on the door, immediately  breaking away from Hyunjin making him groan at the loss of contact.

“Are you okay in there y/n?” you heard Felix call out.

“Y-yeah I’m fine!” You tried to sound believable but you were still aroused and out of breath. Hyunjin snickered at your fucked out state.

“You sure? You were making some… questionable noises.” It sounded like Felix regretted saying that the moment the words left his mouth. With that, Hyunjin let out a laugh but quickly covered his mouth. You stared at him in shock and smacked his arm.

“Was that…? Y/n is Hyunjin in there with you?”

You immediately shoved Hyunjin off you when you heard the door slowly open. 

“Wait- Felix don't!" you exclaimed as Hyunjin tried covering your body with a blanket.

Felix walked in and immediately yelped when he saw you two shuffling to hide under the sheets.

“Oh my god!!”

“Dude, get out!” Hyunjin threw a pillow at Felix which he successfully dodged by slightly closing the door.

You heard various foot steps coming towards your room along with muffled voices and your began to race as you reached for your clothes.

“Yah! What’s all the fuss about?” Bangchan said from down the hall.

“Nothing!” You and Hyunjin yelled out as Hyunjin leapt up to shove Felix out of the room, seeing as he had more clothes in than you. Once Felix was fully out the room, Hyunjin shut the door turning and leaning his back on the door. You were to shocked by what just happened to comprehend what the boys outside the door were gossiping about.

Hyunjin let out a shaky sigh then burst out laughing. You cocked a brow at him.

“What could possibly be so funny at a moment like this?”

“Sorry, sorry it’s just- you’re cute when you’re flustered that’s all.” He said between a shaky laugh.

You dramatically sigh pulling the blanket over your head with a groan. You suddenly feel the bed dip beside you and you gasp when two legs hover over you. Hyunjin pulls the blanket away from your face to reveal your flushed state.

“Don’t get shy on me now,” he teased. “We were just getting started.”

[handweavers]

something that comes up for me over and over is a deep frustration with academics who write about and study craft but have little hands-on experience with working with that craft, because it leads to them making mistakes in their analysis and even labelling of objects and techniques incorrectly. i see this from something as simple as textiles on display in museums being labelled with techniques that are very obviously wrong (claiming something is knit when it's clearly crochet, woven when that technique could only be done as embroidery applied to cloth off-loom) to articles and books written about the history of various aspects of textiles making considerable errors when trying to describe basic aspects of textile craft-knowledge (ex. a book i read recently that tried to say that dyeing cotton is far easier than dyeing wool because cotton takes colour more easily than wool, and used that as part of an argument as to why cotton became so prominent in the industrial revolution, which is so blatantly incorrect to any dyer that it seriously harms the argument being made even if the overall point is ultimately correct)

the thing is that craft is a language, an embodied knowledge that crosses the boundaries of spoken communication into a physical understanding. craft has theory, but it is not theoretical: there is a necessary physicality to our work, to our knowledge, that cannot be substituted. two artisans who share a craft share a language, even if that language is not verbal. when you understand how a material functions and behaves without deliberate thought, when the material knowledge becomes instinct, when your hands know these things just as well if not better than your conscious mind does, new avenues of communication are opened. an embodied knowledge of a craft is its own language that is able to be communicated across time, and one easily misunderstood by those without that fluency. an academic whose knowledge is entirely theoretical may look at a piece of metalwork from the 3rd century and struggle to understand the function or intent of it, but if you were to show the same piece to a living blacksmith they would likely be able to tell you with startling accuracy what their ancient colleague was trying to do.

a more elaborate example: when i was in residence at a dye studio on bali, the dyer who mentored me showed me a bowl of shimmering grey mud, and explained in bahasa that they harvest the mud several feet under the roots of certain species of mangroves. once the mud is cleaned and strained, it's mixed with bran water and left to ferment for weeks to months.  he noted that the mud cannot be used until the fermentation process has left a glittering sheen to its surface. when layered over a fermented dye containing the flowers from a tree, the cloth turns grey, and repeated dippings in the flower-liquid and mud vats deepen this colour until it's a warm black. 

he didn't explain why this works, and he did not have to. his methods are different from mine, but the same chemical processes are occurring. tannins always turn grey when they interact with iron and they don't react to other additives the same way, so tannins (polyphenols) and iron must be fundamental parts of this process. many types of earthen clay contain a type of bacteria that creates biogenic iron as a byproduct, and mixing bran water with this mud would give the bacteria sugars to feast upon, multiplying, and producing more of this biogenic iron. when the iron content is high enough that the mud shimmers, applying this fermented mixture to cloth soaked in tannins would cause the iron to react with the tannin and finally, miraculously: a deep, living grey-black cloth.

in my dye studio i have dissolved iron sulphide ii in boiling water and submerged cloth soaked in tannin extract in this iron water, and watched it emerge, chemically altered, now deep and living grey-black just like the cloth my mentor on bali dyed. when i watched him dip cloth in this brown bath of fermented flower-water, and then into the shimmering mud and witness the cloth emerge this same shade of grey, i understand exactly what he was doing and why. embodied craft knowledge is its own language, and if you're going to dedicate your life to writing about a craft it would be of great benefit to actually "speak" that language, or you're likely to make serious errors.

the arrogance is not that different from a historian or anthropologist who tries to study a culture or people without understanding their written or spoken tongue, and then makes mistakes in their analysis because they are fundamentally disconnected from the way the people they are talking about communicate. the voyeuristic academic desire to observe and analyse the world at a distance, without participating in it. how often academics will write about social movements, political theory and philosophy and never actually get involved in any of these movements while they're happening. my issue with the way they interact with craft is less serious than the others i mentioned, but one that constantly bothers me when coming into contact with the divide between "those who make a living writing about a subject" and "those who make a living doing that subject"

[cherry-hulu]

greetings...i respectfully would like to place down my 2 cents for diamond life

reader is hard at work under the desk in woozi's studio, whenever a member-specifically shua and minghao or honestly whichever member wants to blow off some steam while recording, all woozi has to do is pull them off him, hold them by the hair and let said member go nuts...the sadists that they are 🤐

— Accelerando!

Warnings: woozi x free use!reader x joshua x the8, cockwarming, oral (m receiving), tears, gagging, lots of cum, voyeurism, filming

More like this... Diamond Life : The Series

Recordings can either be the smoothest sailing days or the harshest battles against the flow. Sometimes it would be over in a few hours, sometimes it could take up the whole day.

When the members said Woozi practically lived in his Universe Factory, they meant in. He even had his own foldable bed in it and everything. All his amenities at one place for his comfort.

Out of all the members, Woozi would argue that he benefited from you the most. He had always loved the idea of cockwarming, especially while he worked on his chair. The idea of someone keeping his cock warm and hard while he made music was magical.

You sat under his desk, legs crossed, eyes closed, head resting on his hard muscle packed thigh, mouth occupied with his heavy thick dick in your mouth. You may seem at rest but your tongue definitely wasn't. Occasionally moving, licking the veins from the sides of his cock. Throat constricting at carefully calculated times.

"Lets do one more run towards the end. I wasn't satisfied with the last part, I think both of you can do more." Woozi spoke, his fingers pressing on the button talking to Joshua and Minghao who was in the booth recording for a duet.

Minghao sighed and nodded, Joshua just held his headphones in understanding. The two calmest members of the group, but the last person they'd want to piss off. An enigma of the saying 'The calm before the storm.'

The two went for a few more rounds in the studio, before slowly, the frustration started creeping in, tension building up in the booth until it was showing in their voices.

Truth is, Woozi was doing this on purpose, he believes that there's no better view than you choking and crying on a dick. He would always do it to you, loving the bulge his cock would imprint on your throat, the way your glassy eyes look up at him showing no signs of thinking, completely dumb and cock drunk.

As much as he loves seeing it in first person, he can't help but wonder what it'd look like in second. The boys really have spending alot more time together, Seungkwan's enthusiasm over exhibitionism was starting to get to him.

"Hyung.. I don't think I can do it anymore, it's getting overwhelming. We've been here for hours repeating the same line over and over again. I need a break." Minghao complained, ever so well thought out and collected, but his body language says otherwise. He looked stiff, eyes tired and basically begging for rest.

"I agree, I think it would be better for us to have a break and recollect ourselves, maybe it's the exhaustion that's causing the bad outcomes." Joshua nodded, looking back and forth between his friends.

You open your eyes at the sound of their voice, looking up to Woozi with a hopeful look. He told you of his plans asking for consent, and you eagerly nodded not even a second after the words left his mouth making him chuckle and call you a slut.. which you ultimately got heated up over, and no, you didn't beat him to death, but your pussy may say otherwise.

The pale man was silent for a minute as if he was thinking, before ultimately agreeing and letting the boys out. As the duo leave the booth, Woozi pulls his dick out of your mouth making your saliva drip all over the floor and off his dick.

Rolling his chair to the side, he reveals you to the boys, looking pretty all wet and open wide for the two. "It would be better for you two to release your frustrations rather than have them bottled up, 'no?" Woozi said, dick standing up and and as proud as himself for his plan execution.

"Yeah, definitely." Joshua sighed, pulling his dick out of his pants, getting harder and harder each passing second as you crawl on your fours to get to him. He gives his dick a few strokes before shoving himself in all the way in your mouth.

Joshua, Seventeen's Gentleman, was nothing like the man the public perceives of him. He was anything but gentle, always leaving you bruised and nearly unconscious after fucking you. Cuffing you down, pressing you hard against the bed, everything but being gentle.

Minghao was silent, but he wasn't non threatening, situating himself behind you, his focus immediately zeroed in on your exposed cunt. You were wearing only a thin oversized shirt — probably from Mingyu — and nothing else. What was the point of wearing under wear when it's just gonna be put aside anyways?

The chinese man was known for his relentless and often unfiltered mouth. He wasn't any different in sex, seemingly having developed an oral fixation on your pussy, always eating you out whenever given the chance to. He usually starts off slow, before adding his fingers, and going feral using you.

Your whimpers were muffled by the dick inside your mouth, heavy and big. Joshua surprisingly was starting off slow as well, probably due to the younger kneeling behind you. But his pace doesn't stop him from going rough. Giving you deep, hard thrusts, that have your eyes rolling to the back of your head.

Tears were already rolling of your face, muted gagging sounds emmited from you as he sensually fucked your mouth as if it was your cunt.

Woozi felt like he was in a real life porno. Sitting like a king in his chair with his legs in a manspread, slowly jerking off his hard on. From his perspective, the bulge on your mouth was extremely evident. Him and Joshua were pretty similar in girth, having only an inch difference in length.

From behind you, Minghao was finally starting to quicken his pace. Slender fingers now toying with your cunt, tongue lapping and licking all over you resulting in nasty slurping sounds. He didn't knew whose cum was mixxed with yours, but whoever it was, his diet must be healthy for it to taste this good. Or maybe it was just your magic.

His tongue slides in and out of you, practically cleaning you up to get you ready for a fresh new batch of cum inside of you.

Joshua was now collecting your hair and putting it up in a pony tail, his big hands giving him no struggle with the task. You mentally prepare yourself as this was his ritual before losing all his mercy on you. He groaned as he gives you a deep hard thrust, before pulling out and pushing back in, this time with a much faster, deeper, pace.

Minghao moves his face away from your cunt, opting to finger you instead. His dick was getting painfully hard, having been ignored for too long. His patience runs thin when he's horny.

Finally taking his dick out, he pushes in inside of you, immediately matching with his hyungs pace in a way that he was in fucking into you at the same time Joshua was. Two dicks pressing deeply inside of you at the same time, at the same intervals.

You sounded and looked like a mess. Torn between gagging and moaning. Your face was flushed, full on crying now. Had it not been for Joshua in front of you, your face would be on the floor planted flat right now.

Woozi was shamelessly jerking off while watching the whole thing. His mind has orchestrated alot of masterpieces throughout his life, this was no doubt one of them.

"Agh.. fuck." Joshua strangled out as he came in your mouth, forcing your face into his dick, nose pressing against his pelvis. He was a heavy heavy cummer, emphasize on heavy if it hadn't been yet. Always leaving you full or choking even more on his cum, not just his dick.

Sweat was dripping of his forehead as he look down on you, panting with veins visible all over his arms and face. "Good girl, good job. Take it all. All of it." Joshua praised in a husky voice, clearly worn out from todays activities. But no matter how tired he was, he would never pass out on your hole.

Minghao followed soon after, filling up your other hole with his own cum. He rocks his hip back and forth into you creating a ring of cum around his dick. "Hyung.. look at this." Minghao called out, eyes focused on where the two of you connect.

It was all Woozi needed for him to cum as well. Cursing under his breath as a string of cum spurts out his dick, landing all over his chair, shirt, and even on the floor.

Joshua reached out to his back pocket for his phone. Opening the camera, he hit the record button making surs to catch your face in the frame.

Slowly, he pulled his dick out of you, a flow of his cum dripping out of your mouth. You were panting like a dog, eyes blown out, all fucked out to realize that there was a camera in front of you. Joshua pressed a thumb on your tongue, prompting you to open up more.

He dragged his thumb from your tongue to your lip, spreading cum all over. Angling his phone to where it catches the both of you, he pulled you into a kiss, tasting and cleaning his cum from your mouth. Tongues lapping all over each other, dirty sounds coming from the two of you. Alternating between open mouth kisses to French kissing.

"Fuck, hyung." Minghao whispered when he felt his dick getting hard again. Looks like it won't be just the three of them who'll be working hard in the studio today.

[niresenrab]

The 141 after retirement (Soap lives AU)

Price realized 37 years in that he's been all over the world, but he hasn't actually seen much of it. He wants to travel the world. Go hiking in the mountains just to enjoy the view without being shot at. Go to a cafe and savor his coffee without scouting out a target. Look out during a flight just to enjoy the sight of the clouds below him without thinking about RPGs. He wants to curl up in bed with Nikolai and just enjoy his company without a transaction. He decides to take his big Russian husband to travel the world with him. Price starts a travel blog to keep his boys updated on their trips.

Ghost is struggling to adapt to retirement. He's not used to having free time, always going on missions or training recruits. Something. Anyways, he gets really into sculpting. He already has experience with mask making, and this isn't much different. He'll use any kind of material. Wood? Widdling is basically sculpture. Clay? A bit frail, but he can work with this. Stone? They now have a massive statue in the front lawn. Ghost can also fuck it up with paper mache. He is on pinata duty for forever, and he'll make them of anything. One of Gaz's kids is really into sea bears? He can work with that.

Gaz has three kids, a wife, and a chunky cat that he takes on trips with a backpack. He hosts monthly dinners for the team to catch up. One of his kids called Ghost "Uncle Goose", and now all of the Garrick kids call Ghost "Goose". Farah gets to be the cool aunt that teaches the kids things that she shouldn't be teaching them. Price definitely takes the role of the dad that sits in the armchair and takes loud open mouthed naps during their gatherings. Gaz wonders why he keeps hosting these dinners.

Soap and Ghost got married shortly after Ghost retired. Johnny was not expecting to come home to a house full of new sculptures, but he completely accepted the change. He helped Ghost renovate the guest room into an art studio with his drawing stuff on one side and Ghost's sculpting stuff on another. A few of their pieces even made it into galleries.

Nikolai, obviously, retired the second Price did. He travels with Price regularly, but likes to teach a mechanics class at the local community college in his free time. Of course he shows off his black hawk to the students, but they can only tinker with the cheaper aircrafts (as if any of them cost less than a million). His classes fill up fast and he has the reputation for the cool teacher.

[joooooniecore]

Dior's beloved prince

mingyuxfem!reader, rivals to lovers, Reader as a designer, Mingyu as the brand ambassador of Dior and a model, Mingyu is the biggest flirt, Mingyu has a nickname for reader.

PLOT: When Mingyu was chosen as the brand ambassador of Dior, you couldn't help but sigh annoyingly. It got worse when you were asked to design an outfit for him for the upcoming fashion show. Will you be able to do it without any issues? Or will old grudges resurface?

WARNINGS: smut, explicit scenes, foul language, minors dni, smut scene has been marked, skip if uncomfortable

You have been in the fashion industry for quite a long time. From time consuming projects to extensive runway shows, you have done it all. You have devoted your entire life to make a name out of your talents. You are currently working under Dior as one of their main designers. Your team makes sure that every piece that comes out with the tag of Dior gets its deserved attention and love. You love your job and most importantly you love being able to creatively think and make designs that are appreciated by millions. You have always wanted to be a famous fashion designer and now being at such a peak, you are nothing but grateful.

The only thing or rather you say person who makes you dread fashion weeks is Kim Mingyu, the most famous brand model and also ambassador of Dior.

Mingyu has been with the brand for years now, working side by side with you for several fashion weeks. He is everything that annoys you. He is tall, handsome, flirtatious and extremely cocky. He knows that he can make heads turn whenever he enters the room. Kim Mingyu has been a bane to your existence since years now. He openly flirts with you and annoys you with his infinite confidence.

If he toned down his cockiness a bit, then he would not have been on your hit list. He looks exactly like the man you ever dreamed of. He is sweet to everyone, has dashing looks and is very tall, above six feet if you dare notice. He towers over you by a lot and it sometimes causes a funny feeling in your stomach. You are no doubt attracted to him but you will never confess that. He doesn’t need any more assurance that he is desired by everyone. You are basically the only person who seems immune to his charms and you would love to maintain that personality.

It was a fine day in the Dior building, you were in your studio working on some new men’s fashion pieces. The fashion show was in a few months and the hectic schedule was basically locking you and your fellow designers in the office for several hours. You have finalized a few designs but most of them needed some alterations before they could be shown on the runway.

The first and only obstacle came in the form of Mingyu himself. He was asked to come in and see some of the latest collection clothing and that meant you have to tolerate him for a few hours. You could tell when he walked in through the door of the studio as everyone working turned their heads to get a glimpse of him. Mingyu had that aura. He was extremely charismatic and kind and everyone loved getting attention from him. He would stare at you as if you have hung stars in the sky. And somehow despite being such a sweet person, he never failed to annoy the living shit out of you.

“Hello Miss ____. It’s always a pleasure to work with you.”, Mingyu said with a smirk and stood in front of you, bowing ninety degrees.

You bowed back and said through gritted teeth, “Same goes for you too.”

Mingyu smirks as he takes the seat beside you while you ask your assistants to arrange the designs he needs to look into. You got busy with other work but you could constantly feel him watching your every move. Your entire body felt squirmy as you could feel his hot gaze following you. This is the kind of effect that Mingyu had on you. It infuriated you. You have been known as a very work-oriented person and you never waste your time casually dating or even one-night stands. You don’t easily get attracted to anyone in particular and you are sure that Mingyu is to blame for that. You have never felt your heart beat so fast for someone before him.

“Do you need anything?”, you finally ask, unable to ignore his constant stares.

“Huh? No.”, said Mingyu as he slowly smiled.

“Then why are you staring at me?”, you snap back.

“Don’t flatter yourself. I was just interested in seeing your designs.”, Mingyu replied with a smirk as he scooted closer and took a hold of one of the numerous sheets of paper that were scattered across your desk.

You slightly tilted your head to see the one he was looking at and got back to work, mentally promising yourself to not get effected by his presence. A few minutes later, Mingyu was called in to see into the different designs and you sighed in relief as he walked away. He was supposed to see few designs from each of the designers and choose one from among them for the day of the fashion show.

You waited impatiently as he skimmed through the pages, and discussed with his manager. You stood their silently as you tried to peek at every outfit he looked at. Mingyu would have looked good in every single outfit and honestly it kind of annoyed you. At last, he stopped on a page as his eyes twinkled. You couldn’t decipher if it was interest or mischief.

“I think these designs are great. I like the embroidery used in them.”, Mingyu explained in a serious tone.

Your heart started beating fast after hearing the decision. No matter how much you hate Mingyu, you knew he was extremely famous and if he were to wear an outfit designed by you then it will only boost your popularity. But this comes with another terrifying truth. You are hit with that reality. Choosing your design means you have to work close to him. The fashion show was a month away and you were now supposed to work with him for most of it.

The thought made you sigh exasperatedly. Mingyu was a perfectionist and it would have been an owner for any designer to work with him. Not for you. You and Mingyu go way back in college. You both knew each other’s everything. You both weren’t friends, but more like academic companions. Since college, you both were at each other’s throats and you have no idea how that seeped into your work life.

When Mingyu became famous, you were somewhat proud. Even though you both fought for marks and good grades in college, you knew he was hardworking. Hence you even decided to congratulate him by sending him some flowers which were blatantly ignored by him. At first you thought maybe he didn’t recognize your message so you decided to text him but he never responded. Slowly you realized how the popularity might have gotten into his head and you never tried again. Until now. Until the day he became the brand ambassador of Dior and your life turned upside down.

___________

You still remember the day he first came to meet the designers and how his eyes landed on you and he followed through with a smooth smile and a wink.

“Long time no see firecracker.”, Mingyu whispered low so that only you could hear it.

You have always hated that nickname he used.

“This is disastrous.”, you said through gritted teeth as a smile was plastered on your face.

“You two know each other?”, your fellow staff members asked and all you could was awkwardly nod.

___________

Coming out of your thoughts, you saw Mingyu approaching you with a knowing smile. You immediately knew that he chose the designs willingly. He knew they were made by you. Obviously. He has seen you for so long that he was accustomed to the way you made your designs and it has always given you the ick. You hated how well he knew you.

“We will make a great team.”, Mingyu’s smooth voice brought you out of your thoughts as you looked up to him and found him smirking.

You rolled your eyes and replied, “You better behave.”

“Of course, sweetheart.”, Mingyu teases before he walks up to his manager.

As soon as Mingyu is out of the warehouse, the other designers surround you. They congratulate you for getting such a big deal. Most of them were elated by this news as they laughed and gushed about how you were lucky to bag Kim Mingyu. Some of them were salty as they scurried away to their own cubes and started working, completely ignoring your presence.

You awkwardly thanked everyone as you collected your sample designs and sat down on your chair to fix the schedule before mailing it to his manager for him to cross check and let you know about his free slots.

The main plan was to get his measurements and then tailor the outfit. Try them on him and make alterations as required. Mostly it was your work, while he would just come in once in a while to give his views. You took a deep breath as you jotted down the design details in your writing pad before designing them on your tablet. With quick strokes and a little splash of colors, you created the rough draft for the designs. They looked great but you knew Mingyu didn’t want great. He wants perfection and you were not willing to allow him to disrespect you.

The first day of the meeting and dress trial was fixed. You sat in the room, prim and proper, waiting for Mingyu to arrive.

You were actually a bit nervous about your designs. You were a very confident designer but sometimes doubts clog up your mind and it becomes hard. You never really understood how Mingyu was so rude for the initial years of your career, not responding to you and now being extremely friendly. It made your blood boil. He was so nonchalant and you just couldn’t help but feel the anger.

“Are you plotting a murder?”, Mingyu’s playful voice brought you out of your thoughts.

You looked up to him and scowled. “I might.”, you said through gritted teeth.

“Oh, come on. I am too handsome to die.”, Mingyu dramatically commented.

You rolled your eyes and guided him to the dressing room and handed him the outfit.

“This is the shirt and these are the pants. I am yet to decide on a blazer so you need to try these first.”, you explained as you handed the sample garments in his hands.

He quietly took everything and with a wink and a finger salute he was inside the dressing room.

You patiently waited outside as you heard him hum a song and change. You were actually getting anxious by how much time it took him to wear a shirt and pants.

“Are you done?”, you asked finally.

“Almost. Wait.”, his muffled voice was heard.

“Come on. If you don’t come out within five minutes then I will get in.”, you warned not sure if you will actually do that.

“Wanna see me naked so quick?”, Mingyu’s teasing voice made you roll your eyes for the umpteenth time.

Finally, after what felt like hours, Mingyu came out wearing the outfit you provided.

“This feels a little bland in my opinion.”, commented Mingyu as soon as he was out of the dressing room.

“I think so too, yeah.”, you subconsciously said as you jotted down changes in the outfit.

You were at first asked to put some embroidery on the collars only but it seemed to ruin the balance of the outfit. He was extremely tall and well built. Against his looks, his outfit seemed of extremely poor taste. You couldn’t exactly change the style because it followed the current theme of the fashion show so you needed to make minor changes that would look good but not ruin the overall vibe of the outfit.

“Wow you are agreeing with me? A miracle.”, Mingyu said in a high-pitched voice.

“Don’t get used to it Kim.”, you said and before you could realize that you used the nickname you used in college, he caught on it.

“Are we back in our college era?”, Mingyu smirked.

“Shut up.”, you grumbled and went back to mark down the points in your laptop.

Mingyu came up to you and stood behind you as he bends down against you to look at the designs. His hot breath fanned against your ear and neck as he scrutinized the designs. The warmth that radiated through his body made you feel all hot and bothered. Your fingers trembled a bit as you typed away your ideas.

“Why are you on my head?”, you finally asked.

“Already wanting me on you I see.”, Mingyu huskily whispered which caused a shiver run down your spine.

“Shut up and move Kim.”, you retorted.

“I am just watching the way you work.”, Mingyu stood up straight and answered.

“I don’t want your scrutiny. Our meeting time is over anyways. Don’t you have other things to do?”, you interrogated.

“I do but I love seeing you.”, he said and you just pushed him away. He gladly allowed you to push him as he picked up his bag and was out of your office.

You exhaled a sigh you didn’t know you were holding as you got back to work. You hated how much your body reacted to his closeness. Mingyu knew he had an effect on you and you won’t allow that weakness to become his advantage.

___________

The next few days went by in a blur. You were extremely busy in monitoring the designs that were getting ready for the fashion show. You had several board meetings decided the time and sequence in which the designs would be shown. The meetings were held at odd hours as you worked hard in making this show a successful one.

And as for Mingyu’s outfit, you decided to take the matter in your hands. The main tailoring was obviously done by your staff but you decided to do the embroidery by yourself because you trusted none. Only you knew what kind of design you want and you were going to perfect it.

You altered the design a bit and decided upon adding jewels to the pattern. It was a last-minute decision and your fellow designers approved it for you. You were a bit skeptical with how it might turn out but your colleagues supported you.

The days leading up to the fashion week were hectic. You didn’t get enough time to schedule a meeting with Mingyu so you asked your staff members to look into it and make sure he likes the design.

“Hello miss ___.”, a smooth voice came through the phone as soon as you picked it.

You were currently at home, resting for a bit before you have to rush again for work.

“What is it, Kim?”, you answered without even double checking.

“How did you know it was me?”, he asked in a surprised tone.

“I can recognize your annoying voice anywhere.”, you boringly replied back.

“Aww you love my voice so much?”, Mingyu replied in a teasing voice.

“Do you have selective hearing? I said annoying.”, you snarled and all you could hear was his deep chuckle.

“How do you even have my number?”, you finally asked.

“Got it from your staff to discuss some important matters.”, Mingyu said in a serious tone.

“What is it? Is the outfit not satisfactory? Are any alterations required? Wait let me grab my notepa-”, before you could finish the sentence, Mingyu spoke.

“No need. I just wanted to let you know one thing.”, Mingyu said cutting through your blabbering.

It made you panic more. He is never this serious when it comes to talking with you. The way he sounded so professional somehow caused you to blush. His voice was commanding and deeper than usual and it created some kind of reaction in your body.

“I didn’t like that you weren’t present at the dress trial meeting.”, Mingyu finally spoke in the same light hearted voice.

“Goddamit. I actually expected you to say something important!”, you sighed loudly as Mingyu doubled up in laughter.

“Come on. I can never not annoy you.”, Mingyu said and all you could do was roll your eyes.

“But honestly, why weren’t you there?”, Mingyu asked in a soft voice.

“I have been busy. With the fashion show happening soon, I have to make sure that everything is perfect and I also needed some rest so I let my staffs take on the meeting.”, you didn’t know why but you thought he deserved this explanation.

The rest of the days went by and the tension just simply increased. You hated Mingyu’s guts. He would randomly text you or call you or even come to your office to meet you. Annoying remarks, accidental touches and stern gazes just got all bundled up in your head. You were hot and bothered but still not ready to back down. You were never going to let Mingyu win this game.

So, you decided to dress to impress. The fashion show went by in a glimpse but the main event for the ambassadors and designers was the after party. You have decided upon a dress designed by your friend. She was extremely happy when you asked her about it. It was a strapless black short dress with the white underskirt visible only at the hem. The dress had intricate designs that subtly covered the entirety of the bodice. It was perfect, elegant and flattering.

___________

As you got ready for the afterparty, you scrolled through your social media and it was full of pictures of Mingyu. He was looking extremely handsome. His looks did justice to the outfit. It was a simple fit but him being the one wearing it made it look even better. You couldn’t help but deny the way the shirt fitted him like a glove. His strong biceps straining the material to its farthest limit when he raised his hand in the pictures. Even through the blazer, you could trace his muscles perfectly. He looked mouth watering and you allowed yourself to fantasize him for a bit.

After applying a subtle makeup along with a bold lip combo, you decided to blowout your hair for it to form the desired waves you wanted. The face framing layers made your face look exactly like you wanted it to look. You smiled looking at the mirror and after taking your purse, you were off to the party.

The moment you entered the party; you could feel someone’s gaze on you. You turned to see Mingyu intently watching and you mentally congratulated yourself for choosing this dress. You decided to ignore him as you walked up to your colleagues and gave them a greeting smile.

“You look gorgeous!”, your friend gushed as you gave her a twirl.

“You did justice to this dress.”, she complimented.

“No. You made me look pretty.”, you said back as you both giggled.

You weren’t exactly planning to drink much so you took a glass of champagne and decided to nurture it for the rest of the night.

Halfway through the party you saw Mingyu approaching you. You acted nonchalant as you sipped your drink.

“Did you see my pictures?”, Mingyu asked as soon as he sat beside you.

“Why would I?”, you asked back.

“Oh, come on I know you did and you liked it.”, Mingyu said with a smirk as he scooted closer to you. His hand resting on the backrest of your bar stool as he brought his face closer to your ear to speak.

“As if. It was my design which made you look good.”, you answered looking straight into his eyes with a smirk.

“So, I did look good!”, Mingyu triumphantly announced as he gave you his famous lopsided smile that proudly showed his canines.

You sighed loudly and decided to ignore him. You thought if you ignored him enough, he would get bored and leave you alone but alas. The alcohol was slowly affecting you and you were feeling all warm and mushy.

Before Mingyu could say another word, your colleagues pulled you to the dance floor which you gladly allowed. You started to feel the rhythm seep through your body as you swayed your hips from side to side. You felt a presence behind you as you turned to see a guy trying to hold your hips.

The audacity?

Even though it was a respected party, men still had the audacity to make a woman feel uncomfortable. You tried to move away but he wasn’t giving up. You knew this was going to get annoying soon and you weren’t ready to cause chaos. You knew the man by face as he seemed like one of the models who were invited. You noted his face and then scanned the place to find Mingyu standing only a few hands away from you.

You swiftly passed through the two or three people that separated you from him and held his hand. Firmly.

“Missed me?”, Mingyu said with a smirk.

“Shut up and play along.”, you said as you guided his hands to grab your waist.

“Why?”, he asked, clearly amused rather than shocked but then he noticed the man and you could visibly see his face turn into a stern gaze.

“Did he touch you?”, he asked, voice husky and low. It held so much malice that it caused a shiver down your spine.

“He didn’t. Don’t cause a scene. I will report it later. I know his face.”, you softly explained as you looked at him with pleading eyes.

“Fucking shit. Fine. Guess we will be playing along firecracker.”, Mingyu said with a smirk and pulled you into his arms in one swift motion.

He kept his hands firm on your hips as he made you sway. You felt the blood rush from your head to regions you are ashamed to describe. The way he gently but firmly held you, made you feel so safe. You felt so hot and bothered.

You made the wrong decision to look up to meet his eyes and got lost in the intensity of it. He was looking at you with a look that simply was nothing you have seen before. It was full of intentions which you don’t want to imagine.

“Want to get out of here?”, Mingyu said close to your ear in almost a desperate voice.

“Yes.”, was all you could say as you were pulled away from the crowd and out of the arena.

Mingyu ordered his driver to drive the both of you to his house. He lives in the nearby area. You entered his house and stared at the interior in awe. You have had seen prettier houses but his house screamed Kim Mingyu. It was definitely designed by him. Mingyu has always loved interior designing and it was quite evident in the way his house looked so pleasant.

“Have a seat ___.”, Mingyu’s calm voice brought you out of your thoughts.

“Oh. Yeah thanks.”, you dumbly replied as you settled on the nearby sofa. Mingyu brought a glass of water and settled it on the coffee table before sitting beside you.

You drank the entire glass in one go and it made Mingyu chuckle.

“Easy there firecracker.”, he said while he grazed his fingers on your forearm.

“Nice house Kim.”, you finally said, trying to act unbothered.

“Seriously? Is that what you say after gawking at my house for ten minutes.”, he laughs.

“Not trying to boast your ego here.”, you said as you raised your hands in surrender and saw Mingyu’s eyes trace your neckline.

“Why do you think I have an ego?”, Mingyu asked.

“Hah! You do have. I have first hand experience of it.”, you debated.

“Never have I ever spoken rudely to you.”, Mingyu retorted.

“Not in recent years but in the past yes.”, you explained and you saw Mingyu’s puzzled expression as if he was trying to remember it.

“Remember when you got your first breakthrough in modelling career?”, you asked and saw his face twinkle in recognition.

“Yeah. I sent you flowers and even later texted you but you never responded.”, you said and almost felt shy for holding a grudge for this for so long.

“You were the one who sent me flowers?”, Mingyu asked in a surprised tone.

“Huh? Why? I clearly wrote a letter along with it.”, you answered dumbfoundedly.

“Letter? What letter? I never received- oh.”, Mingyu seemed to grimace a little as he looked at you guiltily.

“What is it, Kim? Spit it out.”, you said clearly feeling frustrated.

“I- okay so I was dating this girl then. She was kind of toxic okay and uhm she told me that the flowers are from her and maybe she threw the letter. She knew about you.”, he explained without maintaining eye contact with you.

“I- wow. I didn’t know that. But your number-”, you couldn’t finish the sentence when Mingyu spoke again “Yeah I changed numbers right after college for a fresh start.”

It all made sense to you. You were just holding an immature grudge against him for all these years and now you felt ashamed.

“Then why do you tease me always?”, you finally asked.

“Because I love the way your cheeks flush red.”, Mingyu answered with a smirk.

“W-What?”, you said as blush again crept up your neck.

“Yes, just like that. I love the effect I have on you, my firecracker.”, Mingyu smirked as he inched forward.

“Don’t you feel it?”, Mingyu said as he grazed your waist.

You couldn’t help but melt in the touch. You have tried to control this feeling for so long. The grudge was the only thing that helped you keep your feelings at bay and now the dam was broken. The gush of water was let loose as you gazed up to him with nothing but lust.

!!SMUT WARNING!!

“Fuck you are so gorgeous.”, Mingyu whispered before he held the back of your neck firmly and pulled your face closer to his. His lips inches away as if he was testing the waters.

“Please…”, you whispered and he slammed his lips against you. It wasn’t a sweet kiss. This kiss was all teeth. It was a storm after the eerie calmness. It was like a tsunami caused by the uprooting of a dam that was holding in the water for so long. His tongue played like waves inside your mouth as his hands grazed over every part of your body, as if memorizing you.

You groaned in his mouth as you placed yourself on his lap, kissing him with more hunger in your lips. His hands grazed up and down your entire body as if trying to memorize the softness of your skin, the curve of your waist. His hands gripped on your exposed thighs, elucidating a groan from your throat.

“This dress has been driving me insane all night.”, Mingyu groaned as he firmly gripped your hips and made you grind on his lap. You moaned in response as your slowly moved your hips in a rhythmic motion.

“The moment I saw you, I wanted to slam you against a wall and kiss you dumb.”, said Mingyu as he stared at your eyes with nothing but lust.

Mingyu found the chain of the dress and slowly pulled it down as it bundled up around your waist.

“Fuck.”, Mingyu whispered as he saw the lingerie you were wearing.

“Please tell me that it is a matching set.”, he pleaded and you nodded shyly.

“Did you wear this for me?”, Mingyu smirked.

“Of course not.”, you snarled back and he smirked before cupping your clothed breast and taking one in his mouth. With the material still in between his tongue and your breast, it created a delicious friction that made you grind your hips more.

“Fuck I will go crazy. You are so responsive baby.”, He whispered against your skin as he picked you up along with him.

“Mingyu...”, you moaned.

“What is it darling?”

“Please Mingyu.”, you had no idea what you were begging for.

“What do you want?”, he smirked as he picked you up and threw you on the bed before hovering over you.

“Take it off please. Take your shirt off.”, you begged.

“Patience my firecracker.”, Mingyu said as he effortlessly lifted you and took you to his bedroom. He slammed you against the soft mattress and then in a painfully slow pace, unbuttoned his shirt before throwing it aside. You were welcomed with his toned chest. You audibly moaned and that seemed to boast Mingyu’s ego.

“Loving the view?”, he teased

“Of course.”, you said as you did a come-hither motion to which he complied.

He dipped his head and trailed kisses down your chest. Starting from your neck, he marked every inch of your skin as you writhed under him. With an agonizing slow pace his mouth finally hovered over your core, which earned a moan from you.

“Please. Mingyu, please.”, you moaned.

Mingyu chuckled and finally teased your core with his tongue which slowly turned into more aggressive licks as he devoured you. All you could do was moan and writhe which also got restricted when he used his left hand to hold your hips down with one strong grip.

Soon you were coming undone on his tongue, as your body shook and all you could do was moan his name.

“I love when you moan my name.”, Mingyu said as he looked at you, his chin glistening with your juices which made you even more aroused.

Mingyu kissed you again as you could taste yourself on his tongue. You shamelessly moaned as Mingyu gripped both your hands over your head with his one large palm while the other traced line against your naked skin.

“I like the way you react to me.”, Mingyu whispered as the trail of his fingers left behind goosebumps adorning your skin.

Suddenly he got down from the bed as you groaned at the loss of his body pressed against yours. You looked up to him as he motioned you to kneel down on the carpeted floor. You complied. You kneeled and looked up at him with lust filled eyes before unbuckling his belt and rubbing his throbbing member over the fabric of his underwear. He let out a guttural moan and you smirked in victory. Having such a big strong man moan for you felt so good that you almost got wet again.

“Don’t tease me love.”, Mingyu groaned and who were you to deny him.

You quickly dragged his pants and underwear down in one go and his dick sprang up, standing proud and thick.

“Fuck you are big.”, you moaned as you moved your palm up and down the length before giving the tip kitten licks.

You took his whole dick in and bobbed your head while consecutively using your hand to create more friction. Mingyu’s fingers went through your hair before gripping it tight to control the bobbing of your head, fucking your mouth deep. Your eyes glistened with tears as you moaned at the feeling of being used by him.

“Fuck baby. You take me so well.”, moaned Mingyu before picking you up in one go and throwing you on the bed again.

“So wet from just sucking me?”, Mingyu teased before sinking two of his fingers in.

“Mingyu, please fuck me. I don’t need your fingers right now.”, you moaned and Mingyu obliged.

“Let me get the condom love.”, Mingyu smirked while watching you being impatient.

“I don’t fucking care. I am on birth control and clean. Just fuck me.”, you said to which he led out a guttural moan and kissed you. Hard.

He slammed his dick in you as your body jolted and you moaned shamelessly.

“Fuck you are so tight.”, he groaned, his eyebrows furrowing as he let out a disgruntled sigh.

“M-Min-gyu…”, you moaned his name as you supported yourself by holding his biceps.

“Keep saying my name.”, Mingyu demanded and you moaned his name loud.

You closed your eyes to feel it more but that wasn’t doing it for Mingyu it seemed. He grabbed your neck, gently chocking you as you looked at him with dazed eyes.

“Look at me when I fuck you right.”, Mingyu said as he slammed into you with more intensity.

“Gyu fuck.”, you screamed as you moaned and groaned.

“That’s it. Baby, cum for me. Cum all over my cock. Cream me fuck.”, Mingyu whimpered as he kept his pace steady and firm.

Within seconds you were reaching your high again as you creamed his cock. Mingyu pace didn’t slow as he kept pounding into you, making a mess out of you. Your juices were everywhere as sweat formed on your forehead.

Mingyu dipped his head, as your foreheads were against each other and whispered, “I am gonna cum baby.”

“Look at me as I fill you up.”, Mingyu groaned.

“Yes please. Fill me up.”, you said in a lust laden voice and that was Mingyu’s undoing as he came inside you.

!!SMUT ENDED!!

After catching his breath, he lied down beside you for a bit before getting up to bring a warm water-soaked towel to clean you and then clean himself. After showering, you wore Mingyu’s shirt and lied down on the soft bed. Mingyu joined you as he pulled your back against his chest and nuzzled into the crook of your neck.

“So?”, Mingyu asked as he propped beside you.

“What?”, you asked as you snuggled against his chest.

“Since we have fixed the grudge part, can I ask you out for a date?”, Mingyu softly asked as he played with your hair.

“I think we did it in the wrong order.”, you chuckled as you looked up to him.

“Well, it was your fault to look that good in a goddamn dress.”, Mingyu grumbled and you found it cute.

“Okay! Okay! I would love to go on a date with you.”, you said with a smile as Mingyu softly kissed you.

Maybe loving him will be better than hating him, right? But did you actually ever hate him? You smile as you find yourself going into deep slumber.

___________________________________

Author's note: Got caught up in work so was not able to deliver this on time. Please ignore any kind of grammatical mistakes, I literally rushed to finish this. I hope I was able to meet the expectations. Do suggest me plots for future stories!

Tag list: @gyuguys @arusio

[sunrizef1]

Silence

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x reader, ex!lewis Hamilton x reader

Warnings: Cheating

A/N: this took too long 😭

_________________________

INSTAGRAM

yourusername

liked by charlesleclerc taylorswift and 15,088,017 others

yourusername I’m not the only “friend” you’ve lost lately

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user1 MOTHER

user2 NEW MUSIC?????

user3 BAD BITCH ALBUM BAD BITCH ALBUM

user4 I LOVE HER

user5 🖕LEWIS

taylorswift 💋

liked by yourusername

user6 hot 😩

user7 PLEASE NEW ALBUM

theweeknd 🔥

↳ yourusername 😘

↳ user8 ???

carlosainz welcome back cariño

liked by yourusername

user9 AHHHHH

y/nupdates

liked by user1 user2 and 200,404 others

y/nupdates y/n was spotted entering a recording studio in LA today!

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user10 YESSSSSS

user11 NEW MUSIC

user12 MOTHER

user13 did y’all see the photos of a man walking in with her… 👀

↳ user14 wait what???

↳ user15 yeah there’s a clip of some guy following her into the studio

↳ user16 was it just her producer???

↳ user17 they were holding hands…

user18 I love her

user19 watch her release it on Lewis’ birthday lmao

↳ user20 girl I hope not I can’t wait until January

↳ user21 it’s already October you’ll survive miss girl

yourusername

liked by taylorswift badgalriri and 41,003,876 others

yourusername silence (the album) out now 🖤

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user22 YEAHHHHH

user23 FINALLYYYYY

user24 this isn’t a breakup album…..

taylorswift 🖤

↳ yourusername 🖤

user25 who is that man????

user26 these are love songs!!!

user27 claiming stargirl

theweeknd ⭐️👧

liked by yourusername

landonorris 🔥

↳ yourusername 😁

user28 who is this about????

↳ user29 probably the man she was seen at the studio with

↳ user30 did anyone figure out who that was?

↳ user31 I don’t think so

↳ user32 plot twist: it’s a driver

↳ user33 lets get back to bed grandma

TWITTER - OCTOBER 16

GRAMMYS NIGHT - 4 MONTHS LATER

INSTAGRAM

charles_leclerc

liked by killatrav landonorris and 4,008,302 others

charles_leclerc you’re the only friend I need ⭐️

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user34 ❤️❤️❤️

user35 love them

user36 my parents

carlossainz congratulation y/n

liked by charles_leclerc

user37 Lewis Hamilton found dead

user38 the fact that y/n said that Charles basically wrote all of me completely on his own 😭

user39 the only thing I've gathered from this is that y/n calls Charles babydoll

user40 quoting ribs in the caption 😭😭😭

landonorris 🥳🥳🥳

↳ charles_leclerc thank mate

↳ landonorris ofc, tell the grammy winner I love her

↳ charles_leclerc no

↳ landonorris 😿

user41 I live for them

yourusername

liked by taylorswift honeymoon and 21,002,387 others

yourusername sharing beds like little kids

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taylorswift ❤️

liked by yourusername

user42 the matching captions I'm weak

user43 they're adorable

user44 aoty ik thats right 😛

theweeknd ✨✨✨

↳ yourusername 💫

user45 have Abel and y/n ever said actual words to each other

user46 I'm so glad she found love after Lewis

landonorris I love you

↳ yourusername thanks bud

↳ landonorris say it back

↳ yourusername love you too

↳ landonorris 😌

user47 I'm so happy for her

charles_leclerc ❤️

↳ yourusername ❤️

[madewithangst]

svt + soft italicized 'oh' moment

PAIRING: seventeen (ot13) x gn!reader FORMAT: drabble/headcanon WARNINGS: a few swear words and cheesy terms of endearment NOTES:

🍒Seungcheol

It isn't a secret to everyone that Choi Seungcheol is an alpha. Along with being an alpha comes the excessive spoiling to his S/O. Sometimes his own band members would get a little concerned about the amount of love aggression he's been giving you. One day, probably just a few weeks of you dating, they were locked in the studio to finish an album that was on a deadline. You surprised him with his favourite food and flowers. FLOWERS. This man has never felt butterflies in his stomach until that day. Basically, he just wanted to be babygirl-ed too, despite his strong demeanor.

😇Jeonghan

Yoon Jeonghan wanted to come home. He hadn't seen the sun all day, and now it had already set. They had been doing a photoshoot for a PR campaign since 2am that it had gotten to a point where smiling was now painful and he's pretty sure his face was bruised up from all the makeup touch-ups. The sun has hidden away from the world again and all he's been thinking about was his shared bed with you. Your limbs all tangled in the warmest and coziest sheet. Just thinking about you helped him relax. Oh.

🦌Joshua

Joshua and you have a shared passion for travelling. He'd shown you LA, Italy, Australia, Africa, and basically the whole of Southeast Asia. So when you got sick on your birthday, he was so devastated not only because you're actually sick, but also the fact that your travel plans had to be postponed. You were lying on the couch wrapped in a thick comforter like a burrito (Joshua's idea) while he made you soup. When he finished, he sat in front of you on the floor and replaced the wet cloth on your forehead. You managed to free your hand from the tightly secured comforter and opened the TV. Despite Joshua's protests, you were able to show him a video. You know those youtube LIVE videos where it's CCTV footage or a person walking around touring the place? That's it. And Joshua realizes now what you're doing. He can't help but think 'I'm so going to marry you.'

😺Jun

He hates when this happens. There are days when a recording of his part wasn't "perfect," to say the least. There would be days when he was sleeping and a phone call would wake him up in the middle of the night to record his part again. Days when he's in the middle of finishing his favorite Netflix series. Or days like when he’s in the middle of a date. He hates when it happens, but when it does, he falls deeper in love with you. You’re so selfless in his eyes that even when you’re about to watch a movie you both have been waiting to see together, you’re still there for him. Waiting and watching as he perfects his solo part of that one song. As he sings, he can't tear his eyes away from you, you were looking back at him with equal amount of adoration.

🐯Hoshi

Kwon Soonyoung, now this man couldn't leave without you by his side. Call him clingy, call him a slug, call him a koala, he doesn't mind all that as long as he's holding you, especially your hands. So on every tour, as long as you're free, he manages to bring you everywhere he go. So one day, while you were touring Europe, your company called you to let you know about a disaster that was going on in the office. Of course, Soonyoung was devastated but understood the situation right away. As he was walking the streets with seokmin and mingyu, he couldn't imagine that he'd feel a physical itch to hold your hand. He almost grabbed Seokmin's while walking. It dawned on him. Oh.

🐈‍⬛Wonwoo

This might sound cheesy, but what better scenario to give to Wonwoo than him gaming? But seriously, you have zero knowledge of what game he's playing right now. You don't even know who the characters are, the mechanics of the game, or how it's even played. And yes, Wonwoo is aware of that all too well. And he knows another thing too: that in the middle of him ranting to you about another player who, quote and quote, "is a fucking menace to society! I would be ashamed if I was their mother. Such a disgrace child," he couldn't help but feel so supported and understood because you were there. Eagerly listening to him. Your evident expressions changed depending on Wonwoo's story. With that, he felt it.

🍚Woozi

It's no secret that Jihoon is a great music prod. It's also no secret that he basically lives in his studio now. Having a S/O was even a fantasy to think about but here you are. They thought that Woozi found a low-maintenance partner, but deep down, you just truly love and support him in whatever he does. That's why you were there for him on the night he was locked in to finish a song that was due the next day. Jihoon was basically done with all his to-do list, but something just wasn't sitting right for him. So, when he played you the songs while you both ate your Chinese takeaway, you suggested a lyric change. He thought his love for you was at its peak already, but being able to help him and achieve the satisfaction he's been longing for in the song, he's even more deeply in love with you (and also the other members because you helped make the song sound so much better).

⚔️Dokyeom

Lee Seokmin is an angel. Everyone knows that. This man always has surprises up his sleeve. He thinks you might get tired of his gestures with how long you two have been together. He just loves love-bombing you all the time, and he shows you that by surprising you. Surprising you with flowers, showing up at your office at random times, food deliveries at ungodly hours, surprise trips—anything you could think of, Seokmin has already given you. But every time he’s running out of ideas, he falls even deeper in love. Because with the effort he puts into his surprises, your reactions are always worth it. You would practically jump into his arms, cry out loud, take a picture of it, and hang it on your wall. So every time he looks at your “wall of Seokmin’s gifts,” he’s reminded that someone loves him just as much as he loves them. And that warms his heart.

🐶Mingyu

He's a photographer, director, filmmaker, and video editor. His favorite subject? You. As he was looking through his files one night, he couldn't help but notice (I mean it wasn't hard to notice at all) that every clip and every photo he had was mostly of you. Of course, some of them were of the boys, but they were either casual shots or social media posts. But yours? He couldn't help but look at his shots as masterpieces. His creativity soared through the roof. Kim Mingyu thinks he should he should be working a different career because of how great these are. There was one shot where he was the focus. You were in the background, watching him with a look that made his heart skip a beat. It was a look he knew well, one he often gave you.

🐸The8

Between you and Xu Minghao, let's admit it: He's the better cook. Not a single dish gets repeated in the household because of his culinary knowledge. So obviously, the way to his heart is a good meal. They just came back from tour. He chose to go straight home instead of attending the after-party, knowing you weren't there. He chose to be hidden in your arms and order some Chinese takeout instead. But that wasn't what surprised him when he arrived home. Instead, there was a full meal on the table, candlelit and mood lights, the finest china and tablecloth in sight. But something was missing, you. He saw you sleeping on your arm in the bar stool, your arm was probably numb by now. But you did all this for him. You'd gone to so much trouble for him, and it meant the world. Oh.

🍊Seungkwan

Everyone knows Boo Seungkwan's insecurities. Immature people would criticize him for this and that (but we all know it's not just Seungkwan who suffers from this). Even his members understand him. They would support and defend him in any way they can. But you, you were gentle and kind, and you know the truth. But once a comment really presses on an "issue" that isn't really in there, you would defend the fuck out of Seungkwan. And that's what he loves you the most. He would bet his life when someone dear to him was hurt, but when he's hurting, he forgets to fight back. "You don't need to change your nose, your laugh, your teeth. You don't need to change a thing, Boo," you'd assure him, your voice a soothing balm for him. "You're enough, just the way you are." And in that moment, he felt it.

🐼Vernon

Vernon is a simple man. Mans just want his sleep and jam. (Un)fortunately for him, you weren't simple. The way you would take care of him and make him feel loved was always extravagant. I think his "Oh" moment was seeing you asleep on his side of the bed. Coming home earlier than expected was supposed to be a surprise. He was probably the one caught off guard now. Not only were you sleeping on his side, but you were also wearing his favorite basketball shorts and sweatshirt. He was a simple man, and a simple gesture like that melted his heart.

🦦Dino

Lee Chan has maknae privileges in Seventeen. But when he’s home with you, he’s back to being the mature, caring, and fatherly (to your cat and dog) Lee Chan. He loves wrapping you in his arms, tangling you in his legs. His best days are just cuddling on the couch all day. You were both watching a drama on TV, lying on the couch in Chan’s arms. You were drifting in and out of sleep but really trying to stay awake because you knew how much Dino had been waiting for this episode to come out and he liked to watch it with you. He looked down at you, a soft smile playing on his lips. Your effort, though small, meant the world to him. Oh.

[chahnniesroom]

some loves

pairing: bang chan x female reader

summary: some loves are too hard to bear. years after being trainees together, chan still thinks of you all the time. he has no idea that a collaboration would lead him back to you.

word count: 6.9k

tags/warnings: reader is an independent singer/songwriter, hurt/comfort, angst, mentions of past injuries, a little bit of jealousy, i am still in denial that chan doesn't do lives anymore, hongjoong from ateez is in this fic

read it on ao3 | masterlist

a/n: once again, sorry for the long time between posts. disclaimer that i do not know much about how the music/idol industry works and i did not really do much research. also i'm not an atiny so sorry if my portrayal of hongjoong is not realistic at all. also also i did a lot of the writing on a new tablet doing handwriting with a stylus to text so please forgive any typos or weird formatting! i didn't have a chance to edit much so i may have missed some things.

Chan’s in his studio when he gets the call. At first, he doesn’t even realise his phone is ringing. It’s 2am on a weekday and he’s been working away for a few hours so the rest of the world has just about faded into the background.

He’s both surprised and intrigued when he looks at the caller ID and sees Hongjoong’s name. Chan would consider Hongjoong to be a friend, but they’re not particularly close and he can’t think of a reason that would warrant this late night call.

“Hey hyung,” Hongjoong greets him briefly before getting straight to the point. “What’s your schedule like in the next few months?”

“It’s actually not too bad,” Chan replies after a moment of thought. “We’re just finalising all the music for the next album so it’ll be a bit of time before we get busy with recording and filming for the comeback. What’s up?”

“You don’t have the answer now and I don’t want you to feel any pressure at all, but would you be interested in doing a collab together?”

“A collab?” Chan repeats. “Like, ATEEZ and Stray Kids?”

“We could,” Hongjoong says reluctantly. “But actually, if you’re up for it then I was thinking more like just you and me. I have a couple tracks that we could work off of and I’ve roped in someone to help me with recording, engineering, and production.”

“Who?” Chan asks, interest piqued.

“Not sure if you’ve heard of them, they go by the name HALLA.”

Chan recognises the name instantly. When Chan had first stumbled upon HALLA one late night scrolling and listening to different independent artists, they seemed relatively unknown. However, a little research revealed that they had KOMCA credits on a number of songs for idol groups, some of which had become widely popular. Their personal work was a variety of genres and a majority of the tracks didn’t have vocals, but the ones that did had clever or thoughtful lyrics. There were a couple of different voices featured in the original songs, both of which were smooth and melodic. HALLA has a style that Chan thinks would complement Stray Kids and he’s considered reaching out to them a few times, but was always held back by something.

There was little about HALLA posted on the internet and while Chan definitely appreciates their privacy, he’s curious to meet the person behind all the songs that he enjoyed. There’s just something familiar about all their music that he can’t quite place, something that he wants more of.

“I’m in,” Chan agrees.

“You can take some time to think about it, talk to JYPE to see what their thoughts are too.”

“No need, I’m interested and I know I can convince management to support this.”

“Well that was easy,” Hongjoong says and Chan can basically hear him grinning through the phone. “And for my own pride, I’m going to pretend that you said yes the second I suggested the collab instead of when I mentioned HALLA-ssi.” Chan instantly flushes and is glad that Hongjoong can’t see him over the phone.

“It wasn’t-” Chan begins to protest.

“It’s okay,” Hongjoong interrupts. “I’m also pretty thrilled to get to work with them, so I understand. Didn’t realise you were familiar with their work, but I guess a hidden gem like them can’t stay hidden for long. I’ll send some files over to you and we can organise a time to work.”

—

Chan finds it easy to work with Hongjoong and they make quick progress on the song, writing lyrics and creating a guide within a couple of weeks. Before he knows it, they’ve scheduled a time for Chan to visit KQ Entertainment to record vocals. Hongjoong knows that Chan is keen to be involved in the production and arrangement of the song too, so they also have a couple sessions booked for that, although Hongjoong teases him relentlessly about just wanting to work with HALLA. The worst part is that Chan can’t even deny it.

Hongjoong meets him at the entrance of KQ Entertainment and quickly takes him through security.

“HALLA-ssi is already in the studio,” Hongjoong explains as they wait for the elevator to arrive. “I was getting input on a track that’s been killing me for the past few days.”

“Did they help?” Chan asks, a little surprised that HALLA is involved in more than just this collaboration. He still hasn't had a chance to connect with them other than quick introductions through text a couple of days ago and he's just as excited to meet them as initially.

“Yeah!” Hongjoong grins, eyes curving into little crescents. “HALLA-ssi is amazing. She only had listen to it a couple times before she came up with suggestions on a few different ways to fix the part that I hated. I left her to finish cleaning the song up and then it’s basically ready for review.”

“How did you start working with HALLA-ssi? I’ve been meaning to try to connect with her.”

“It was actually a friend that suggested working with her. For someone who isn’t signed with a label- which I don’t know how nobody has signed her yet- she’s surprisingly well connected within the industry. I’m sure that KQ would be more than happy to have her work with us, but when I hinted at that, she didn’t seem interested.”

“Really?” Although KQ Entertainment is still one of the smaller companies in the industry, most unsigned artists would still jump at the chance to work there since they have a good reputation, especially due to ATEEZ’s popularity.

“I haven’t poked too much, it’s not really my business. I thought I might as well try. I just know that she’s amazing at her job and I’m grateful that I get to work with her at all.”

They turn the corner to the hallway that leads to the recording studio. The door is ajar and Hongjoong opens it, waving his arm forward to allow Chan to walk through first, before following closely behind.

HALLA’s sitting at the desk and the second Chan sees her face, he stops in his tracks.

“Y/n,” Chan breathes.

You look up, startled, and your eyes connect for a split second before Hongjoong crashes into Chan, sending them both tumbling to the ground.

“Hyung,” Hongjoong complains, unaware of Chan’s inner turmoil. “Why’d you stop?”

Chan lets out an apologetic wheeze from where he’s now trapped under Hongjoong, before resting his forehead against the ground. He needs a second to recover.

It feels like a punch to the gut to see you in front of the recording studio’s computer, fiddling with a track. You look different, but somehow it feels like Chan has been transported right back to his trainee days and all that time that the two of you had spent side by side.

It has been years since Chan last saw you. He had found out that you had left JYPE just months after Stray Kids officially debuted, but all efforts to track you down had been futile. You had changed your number and broken contact with all the other trainees. He had asked around a little bit, but everyone he talked to had been unusually cagey about the subject.

Suddenly, everything makes more sense, especially the little that he knows about HALLA.

As trainees, Chan’s favourite moments had been when you had regaled him with stories of growing up on Jeju Island. The two of you had connected early on through your shared love of the ocean. You had promised him that if he ever went to visit in his free time, you would take him on the best trails up to the Hallasan, the shield volcano, and show him incredible views from the highest point on the island. Occasionally, your parents would send you care packages and the two of you would open them hidden away in one of the vocal practice rooms, the sweet citrus of hallabong exploding in your mouths.

You had always spoken about Jeju Island so fondly, of course you would find a way to indirectly pay homage through the stage name that you chose.

“Oppa,” your voice rings out in the silence of the room. Now, Chan knows why the female voice on some of HALLA’s songs had always seemed hauntingly familiar. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” both Chan and Hongjoong say at the same time, then make eye contact with identical confused expressions.

“Hongjoong-ssi, you didn’t mention that the person you wanted to feature on the track was Channie-oppa,” you say, making it clear who you were addressing your concern to earlier.

“It was supposed to be a surprise!” Hongjoong gets up slowly, dusting off his clothes and scratching at the back of his head, still looking bewildered. “I had no idea that you two knew each other, hyung mentioned he hadn’t worked with you before.”

Chan stays quiet, not sure how much you’re willing to share. Hongjoong must not know about your time with JYPE if he can’t piece together how the two of you could have met.

“Oh- I used to- We trained together back in the day,” you explain sheepishly. “I was with JYPE for a little while and all the trainees knew who Channie-oppa was. That was a long time ago though, I didn’t use the name HALLA back then.”

The five years that you trained at JYPE are more than a little while, but Chan forces himself to bite his tongue at your deliberate understatement. You don’t elaborate further and while it’s obvious that Hongjoong isn’t satisfied with your answer, he’s willing to drop the topic for now. You look relieved when he switches the subject to the song.

The three of you finish recording quickly. It shouldn’t be a surprise, the work so far with Hongjoong has been smooth so adding you to the mix has just made things easier, but Chan knows he’s a perfectionist and it often takes him an almost embarrassing number of takes before he’s satisfied. The only delay comes when Hongjoong decides he wants you to sing some of the backing vocals and resorts to actually getting on his knees and begging. Chan doesn’t go so far, but he can’t help but agree that your voice blends with the song perfectly. Of course, he also just wants to hear you sing.

You relent when Chan quietly voices his agreement and it really shouldn't make Chan feel as smug as it does.

It’s not even early enough for dinner when things are wrapped up. Chan is usually eager to finish a schedule early, but he’s reluctant to leave, taking his time packing up his belongings.

Finally, he doesn’t have a reason to stay any longer so he musters up the courage to ask.

“Do you guys want to go grab some coffee or something to eat?”

You and Hongjoong make eye contact before turning to look at Chan guiltily. His stomach churns for some reason.

“I’m sorry,” you wince. “I actually promised to help Hongjoong-ssi with an ATEEZ song and we need to go over the edits that I made before his meeting with the company later today.”

“Oh,” Chan replies, feeling a little relieved. “Right, no yeah I get it. Hongjoong actually mentioned that earlier, but I forgot. My bad.”

You offer an apologetic smile before turning to the computer, opening up a file.

“I’ll see you guys next time, then,” Chan says, starting to back out of the room.

“Of course! Thank you for your hard work and good job today!” you say brightly. Looking distracted, Hongjoong mumbles an agreement and waves goodbye. Unlike you, he’s not staring at the computer monitor though. Instead, his focus is solely on you. Even from his side profile, Chan can tell that he’s enamoured.

Honestly, Chan can’t really blame him, you look comfortable and confident, swallowed up in an oversized hoodie as you start explaining the alterations that you made to the track. Your voice is calm, but warm and you’re careful to start off by complimenting the work that Hongjoong had done previously.

Chan leaves, resolutely ignoring the twisted feeling that’s back with a vengeance and any thoughts of what the cause might be.

—

Chan can’t sleep. His thoughts are all about you, what you’ve been doing the past few years, what happened to you at JYPE that made you leave, and mostly trying to remember how and why your relationship with him slowly fell apart.

That’s the hardest part. In the darkest time of his life, when Chan had been discouraged and disheartened, you had joined JYPE with a brightness and enthusiasm that gave Chan the motivation to continue being a trainee. He had adored you. He still does.

In those last few months before the survival show had been filmed, Chan’s relationship with you had gone from being everything to nothing. It happened in the blink of an eye, and Chan had never understood what caused you to withdraw so quickly and thoroughly. The two of you had gone from spending almost all of your free time together to you avoiding him at the company, pretending not to hear when he called out your name or tried to get your attention.

The regret of letting you slip away has always eaten away at him, but now more than ever.

Of course, at the time it hadn’t felt so simple. The survival show was Chan’s first serious chance to debut, and not just that, but the weight of having eight other people’s careers depending on his leadership took a toll on all his other relationships. Your absence in his life still hurt, but Chan had lots of practice losing people. He had coped in the way that worked best in the past, throwing himself headlong into producing, training, anything to keep himself from wallowing in his feelings.

Chan doesn’t have any schedules for today, but he still heads to the company. He knows this isn’t the healthiest way to deal with things, but he doesn’t know anything else.

When he arrives, Chan just barely manages to catch a glimpse of a few familiar faces. He calls out before he can think better of it, jogging slightly to catch up. Sana, Momo, and Mina watch curiously as he approaches. He knows that Twice also aren’t in a busy period of the year, so he doesn’t feel guilty delaying them.

“Sorry to bother you all. Sana-noona, I was just wondering if we could chat?”

Sana makes brief eye contact with the rest of the girls before agreeing and waving them to go ahead of her. She follows behind Chan as he leads them into his studio, clearly interested in determining the reason behind this atypical meet up.

“What’s up, Channie?” she asks once the door is closed behind them.

Chan tries to think of the best way to start, not wanting to just outright ask, but not knowing how to subtly steer the conversation into the right direction. Finally, he abandons trying to be casual and just blurts out, “Do you remember Y/n?”

“Of course I do,” Sana says, sounding amused at the sudden mention of you. “You both had reputations for being veteran trainees. I mean, other than Jihyo.”

“I was always surprised that she never debuted,” Chan admits. “I just thought it would happen eventually and I was so shocked to find out that she had left. I didn’t- I don’t understand why she gave up on something she wanted so badly.”

“Give up?” Sana asks, sounding like she’s offended on your behalf. “Why would you say it like that?”

“What do you mean? It was like she was there one day and gone the next, I just assumed that she had enough and quit. Nobody seemed to know anything about it. I never found out why and it’s been kind of killing me.”

“You didn’t hear what happened?”

“What- something happened? To her?” Chan swallows hard, suddenly feeling unwell.

“It- I thought that you of all people would know-”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing, but- you never talked to her about it? You knew her better than any of us.”

“Noona, I didn’t know that she was gone until months later. She obviously didn’t want to talk about it to me, I never reached out at first. When I finally did, her number had been changed. What was I supposed to do?”

“I- It’s better if you were to hear it from her. I don’t know the full story and you know how things can be distorted through gossip. And you especially must know how dangerous that can be.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You really have no clue? The two of you were inseparable…”

“Please,” Chan pleads.

“You know how it is in the industry, you were so close, of course there were rumours…”

It suddenly clicks.

“But we were just friends! And the dating ban-”

“Chan, you know nobody actually sticks to those, right?”

“But really, we were never-”

“I believe you,” Sana says, carefully. “But you know that to management that it doesn’t really matter whether or not anything was actually going on. To them it’s all about the optics. A perceived relationship is just as dangerous as an actual one.”

“Management…” Chan repeats, his mind racing. “They never mentioned anything to me though.”

“You never found it suspicious? You two are extremely close and out of the blue she suddenly stops talking to you, then right after the two of you stop hanging out, you’re chosen for the survival show? Someone must have talked to her at some point. Maybe not management, but for sure someone.”

“You think that’s why it took so long for me to debut?” Chan asks, even though he already knows the answer.

“It was a liability,” Sana explains. “To have a dating scandal so early on? Neither of your careers would survive. It’s painful and a terrible part of the industry but it’s true.”

“And.. Why she left, you know about that too?” Chan pleads.

“I think I’ve said too much already. I know that it’s hard, but some things are really personal.” She pauses for a moment. “What brought this on, anyway? You haven’t mentioned Y/nnie in years.”

“I can’t say much, but I- I saw her today, got to talk to her, found out what she’s been up to.” Sana gasps. Chan continues. “It was so weird to see her after so long. In the back of my mind, I had always wondered, but…”

“I’m glad that you two got to reconnect,” Sana says gently. “The two of you cared about each other a lot, that much was obvious. Talk to her, I think at the very least you’ll be able to find peace about what happened.”

“Noona-” Chan reaches out and pulls Sana into a tight hug. “Thank you for telling me. I appreciate it.”

“Of course. I’m sorry that it took so long for you to find out.”

—

A few days later, Hongjoong schedules another session to work on the song. Leading up to it, Chan is both looking forward to it and nervous, not sure what to expect. Although he still really wants to know what happened to you all those years ago, he’s scared about what he might learn and any part he might have had in it.

After a sleepless night, he ends up arriving almost 15 minutes early. This time, Hongjoong isn’t waiting at the building’s entrance. Instead he had let him know a few days before that Chan could just sign himself in and had sent him the name and location of the studio that was booked. When Chan reaches it, he can make out conversation from inside.

“HALLA,” Hongjoong can be heard through the studio doors, which aren’t fully shut. His tone is petulant and much more casual than it was previously. Chan wonders how much time the two of you have spent together between then and now and he almost misses the next thing that Hongjoong says. “You never told me that you were a trainee before.”

That stops Chan in his tracks, interested in how you’ll respond.

“It was a long time ago.” Your voice is faint. You’re still nice, but Chan can tell that your voice is stiffer than usual. “It doesn’t really matter now.”

This time, Hongjoong doesn’t let it go.

“What happened?” he prods.

“Just drop it,” you warn him. “It’s the past, forget I told you in the first place. Nothing ever came of it anyway.”

“Y/n-” Hongjoong changes tactics, the nagging tone replaced with a quieter, more serious one. You sigh.

“It didn’t work out. Obviously. I’m just not idol material.”

“Oh come on, I don’t believe that for a second. Your producing is good enough that I know for sure you’ve been getting offers to work with more companies than just KQ. When you direct during recording, you can hit every note without any warm up or practice. And I’ve heard your original songs, you must have been considered for both the position of lead rapper and lead singer as a trainee because there’s no way that anybody would let your talent go to waste.” Hongjoong is breathing hard by the end of his rant and Chan can see that this is something that has been bothering him for a while.

“It’s okay, Hongjoong-oppa.” Your voice is gentle, like you’re trying to comfort him. “I’m happy with what I have right now. Really. I’m grateful for all the freedom I have. Getting to work on any project I want and experiment with my music without having to deal with the bureaucracy and politics of the industry? Having that independence is precious to me. I wanted to be an idol for a long long time. But even though that specific plan I had didn’t work out, it doesn’t mean I’m not happy with what I’m doing.”

Hongjoong stays quiet for a while.

“Do you think that if you had the opportunity to debut as an idol now, you would?” he finally asks.

“Oppa, it’s not possible. I can’t dance, I’m too old-” you protest.

“No no, just hypothetically. Like if someone walked into the room and handed you a contract and said that if you signed it in an hour then you’d be able to debut.”

“I- I don’t know.”

“What’s your gut feeling?”

“I think I left that dream behind, I don’t know if I want to go down that path again. I don’t think I have it in me.”

“I’m sorry,” Hongjoong says after another pause. “I shouldn’t have questioned you so much, you shouldn’t have to justify your decisions to me.”

“No, it’s fine. It seems strange, right? For me to be an artist in Seoul and not want to get signed, it's only natural for you to be curious. But I learned a lot when I was a trainee and I learned even more after that and I can say with certainty that this is what I want.”

Chan takes that opportunity to knock on the studio door and push it open.

“Hey, hope I’m not interrupting,” he says, as if he wasn’t just eavesdropping on their conversation and purposely chose when to cut in. “Sorry, I’m a little bit late.”

“Hey, no problem man,” Hongjoong says. “We haven’t had a chance to do anything yet, so you’re right on time.”

“Good to see you,” you chime in. “I think this should be pretty quick so let’s get started!”

As you predicted, it doesn’t take long before a majority of the song is finished. Normally, Chan would be keen to stay involved until the very last detail is finalised, but he trusts you and at the end of this day, it’s Hongjoong’s song so he’s happy to give him the final say.

At the end of the session, Chan once again uses the opportunity to try to catch you alone. The two of you are side by side, packing your bags and Chan asks if you have any plans for the rest of the day. You confirm that you're available and Chan is about to suggest that the two of you take the time to catch up when Hongjoong interrupts.

“Oh, Y/n-ah,” he says. “I was actually hoping to get your input on something and I didn’t have a chance to ask you earlier. Can you please stick around for a bit? Sorry, hyung.”

Hongjoong sounds so sincere that Chan almost doesn’t feel annoyed that he’s stealing all of your time and attention. Almost, because at the end of the day, Chan’s only human. Even though he knows he has no right to feel possessive over you, he can’t stop the petty jealousy that bubbles up inside of him. At this point, there’s no denying the emotion.

Just like the previous session, he leaves alone, heading directly to the studio. Hours later, his breath catches when he checks his phone and sees that you’ve texted him.

[Received - 8:04pm]

Channie-oppa~

[Received - 8:04pm]

This is Y/nnie

[Received - 8:05pm]

Sorry about earlier, I have a contract with KQ Entertainment and work comes first :/

[Received - 8:09pm]

But I’m free now! You still interested in catching up?

Chan stares at the messages until it feels like they’re burned into his retinas. Logically, he knew that you had his number, the two of you were in a group chat that Hongjoong had set up, but this was your first time messaging him privately. The first time you had reached out in years. A precious opportunity that he never thought that he would have. He doesn’t want to mess this up.

He’s also shocked to see you texting so casually. Although the two of you have been comfortable in person, he wasn’t sure that it would translate to one-on-one conversation.

[Sent - 8:10pm]

Hey Y/n!

[Sent - 8:11pm]

No worries at all, I understand. I’m the same way too

[Sent - 8:13pm]

I still wanna meet up… but I’m all the way back in Gangdong-gu 😅 It’d be a bit of a trek for you if you're still at KQ

[Received - 8:13pm]

Gangdong-gu?

[Received - 8:14pm]

Ohh JYPE

[Received - 8:14pm]

My bad, forgot that you guys moved

[Sent - 8:15pm]

Yeahhh

[Sent - 8:15pm]

Headed straight back to the company after we were done, sorry

[Received - 8:18pm]

Well… If you’re willing to wait then I don’t mind. KQ is close to a metro station anyway

[Sent - 8:18pm]

Wait, really?

[Sent - 8:18pm]

No no no, don’t take the subway

[Sent - 8:18pm]

I’ll send a driver. They’re gonna pick you up in 20 min

[Received - 8:19pm]

Wowow

[Received - 8:19pm]

Private driver?

[Received - 8:20pm]

You’re a real superstar now haha

[Sent - 8:21pm]

alsfjshkafs noooooooo

[Sent - 8:21pm]

It’s just faster

[Sent - 8:21pm]

and safer

[Received - 8:22pm]

I’m not complaining

[Received - 8:22pm]

but I’m going to get your autograph when I see you

[Received - 8:23pm]

If I sell it then I can probably afford my own private driver 🤭

[Sent - 8:24pm]

Knew it

[Sent - 8:25pm]

You’re just using me for my fame

[Received - 8:26pm]

Ah you got me this time

[Received - 8:26pm]

*Your fame, your talent, and your good looks

[Received - 8:27pm]

Even tho you were the one that said you wanted to meet up

[Received - 8:27pm]

Hmmm maybe you’re the one using me?

Chan listens to his phone as it continues to vibrate from where it’s lodged in between two of the couch cushions after he threw it across to the opposite side of the room. His face is buried in his hands and flaming red. He feels both giddy and terribly embarrassed.

Chan’s no stranger to flirting, he’s experienced his fair share being on either side through interactions with the members and with Stay, but he forgot how flustered he was being on the receiving end of your teasing. The part he never understood is that your playful tone always gave way to sincerity. Even when the two of you would joke around, he could always tell that you meant every comment that you made about Chan being talented or attractive and that flattered him almost as much as it baffled him.

[Received - 8:32pm]

?? Speechless that I caught on?

[Received - 8:36pm]

I think your driver has arrived… Otherwise I’m being kidnapped

[Received - 8:40pm]

Don’t think I would survive a horror film… I got into the car with no questions asked

[Received - 8:42pm]

It was nice knowing you I guess

When he realises how much time has passed, Chan grabs his phone and runs down to the back entrance of the company. Luckily you haven’t arrived yet and he takes the time to reply to your messages.

[Sent - 8:53pm]

Sorry, lost track of time

[Sent - 8:53pm]

They’ll drop you off at the back door, I’ll meet you there so you don’t have to get signed in or anything

[Received - 8:54pm]

Don’t think you’re getting away with ignoring my other texts

[Received - 8:55pm]

But thanks

[Received - 8:55pm]

Is this back door, the famous one that only allows in authorised people?

[Received - 8:55pm]

I’m honoured

Chan rolls his eyes at your cheesy reference and is in the middle of typing up a response when he sees the car pull up. You step out cautiously, then brighten when you see where Chan’s propping up the door.

“Hey,” Chan greets you. “Glad that you made it safely.”

“Thanks for the ride,” you say, looking around curiously as Chan leads you to an elevator that takes you to the rest of the building. “So this is the new and improved JYP Entertainment. I’d say that it looks the same as before, but I never got the chance to come in.”

“Yeah,” Chan says, rubbing a hand against the back of his neck as he walks. “I mean it’s pretty nice, but at the end of the day a practice room is a practice room and that’s where we spend most of our time.”

“Hmm I think we might have to agree to disagree on that one. You have your own studio don’t you?”

“Ah, kind of. It’s technically a shared one, but practically I’m the only one that uses it unless we’re out of the country for a long time,” Chan confirms.

“Seems a lot better than what we used to have! Do you remember when we used to cram ourselves into that tiny room that barely even fit two chairs and a table?”

“I almost forgot about that, it was so terrible! In the summer it would get so hot that we’d keep the door open-”

“And then someone would come yell at us because we’d be playing music too loud-”

“I remember begging management to install a portable air conditioner on multiple occasions, but they always refused.”

“Of course! Even if they weren’t so stingy, there weren’t any windows leading outside in there, how could they install it?”

“Is that why? I always thought they just wanted us to suffer.”

“That too,” you giggle for a moment, before your smile fades. “But they weren’t totally unreasonable. Management has a different perspective than us, sometimes they know better than us because of their understanding of the industry. They can see things that we don’t.”

It’s clear that you’re no longer talking about air conditioning anymore. A lump seems to have formed in Chan’s throat when he recalls his conversation with Sana. Luckily, the two of you have just arrived and Chan forces himself to smile.

“We’re here,” he says, opening the door and motioning for you to enter ahead of him. “Welcome to Channie’s Room!”

“It’s cute!” you say as you step in. “Very… neat. It’s actually more spacious than it looks.”

“Oh,” Chan says, faltering in his steps for a second. “You- you’ve seen my studio?”

“In case you didn’t realise, you go live every week from said studio. I think at this point everyone in the K-pop industry and every K-pop fan has seen it,” you tease.

“Right, yeah. I didn’t- I wasn’t sure how much you kept up with that kind of stuff,” Chan stammers.

“K-pop or do you mean specifically Stray Kids?” you ask, tilting your head slightly.

“Either I guess," Chan shrugs.

"I will admit that it took me a while to get back into it," you say slowly. "I wasn't... in the best mindset after I left." Chan stays quiet, sensing that you're not quite finished. "I know that I disappeared and I am sorry for not reaching out. I wanted to, but I also didn't know how. I know that I hurt you. That it was cruel to avoid you, not reply to your messages, ignore your calls. I had my reasons why, but it doesn't excuse the pain that I caused, and I'm sorry for that too."

“I think,” Chan swallows hard. “I think that the most difficult part was that for the longest time, I didn’t know why. I didn’t know what I did wrong. I asked Sana about it finally, after I saw you again. And I just felt so stupid to realise that it was obvious to everyone except me."

“I’m sorry,” you say again. “I wanted to tell you, of course I wanted to. But I also knew you. If I had told you that us being together was preventing your debut-”

“I wouldn’t have cared,” Chan finishes your sentence for you, starting to understand. “I would have done anything to keep you by my side.”

"Even if it meant throwing away your career," you say softly. "I couldn't let you do that to yourself. You worked so hard, how could I live with being the reason that you were stuck in the training rooms? You belong on stage, making music.”

"The part that I still don’t get though is why you left? You should have been able to debut as well, I know it."

“Ah,” you say wistfully. You look around and grab onto the pillow that’s on the couch beside you, fidgeting with it as you figure out what to say next. “You know, I actually was supposed to debut.”

“What? How come I never heard about it?” Chan feels a pang in his chest. All these years ago, the two of you had promised that the other would be the first person that they would tell if they ever found out that they had the chance to debut. It seemed that neither of them had kept their promise.

“It was supposed to be a secret project. JYP wanted to see how successful a surprise debut announcement would be. You should have seen the NDAs that they made us sign.” You shake your head, letting out a huff of air. “It turned out to be a good decision because it meant they could cancel it without anyone knowing that we existed in the first place.”

"Who was in the group?" Chan asks.

"There were five of us. I think you know all of them, Sumin, Ryujin, Sojin, and Hyowon," you list. You're right, Chan is either familiar with or has heard of all the girls that you mention. It doesn't make sense though, the group was filled with talented individuals and Chan can't think of any reason strong enough to lead to disbandment. Even more baffling is that of the five of you, only Ryujin ended up staying at the company long enough to join the lineup for another group.

"And they just cancelled it out of nowhere?"

“No... It was- I know that for any idol, preparing for debut is tough, but I think that in some ways, it’s especially brutal for the girl groups," you say instead. Chan doesn't question you further, knowing that you must have a point that you're trying to make.

“How so?” Chan has an idea, he’s seen what the female trainees went through, the differences in how they were evaluated and criticised. But he wants to hear it from you, wants to understand what you’ve been through.

“The visual aspect feels like it’s more heavily emphasised than our talent or skills. We were measured for our music video outfits the second they finalised the concept. It was really early on, but at the time I thought it was so exciting and fun that I didn’t question it. I think that all of us were so thrilled by the thought of debuting that we didn't think anything of it. We did our final fittings for it a few weeks before filming and they had made them all a size too small, everything was just a little bit too tight. They didn’t outright say it, but it was implied that they weren’t going to alter them. It was a choice to lose weight or our chance to debut was gone. We were devastated and angry and eventually just resigned. If that's what it took then I would do it. We dieted like crazy for the time leading up to filming,” you laugh, but it's in disbelief, the sound is hollow.

Paired with what you’re saying, it makes Chan want to burn the whole world down. He doesn't say anything, not sure if he can even open his mouth without letting his rage escape, something that you don't deserve.

“We were practising, like always," you continue. "There was a tricky step that needed to be fixed by the next day when we’d be recording, a flip that we hadn't quite mastered. I was the smallest one on the team, so I was the one being flipped. It must have been like 3 or 4 in the morning, we were all tired, hungry, and nervous about filming. Honestly, I don't quite remember what happened, it was all a blur. There was just this feeling that something went wrong and then pain."

You roll up the pants on your left leg and show off the skin there. Chan has to hold back a gasp at the sight. Even though it’s long healed, the scarring is extensive and obvious. Chan can't imagine how much it must have hurt.

“I broke my ankle in two places and sprained my wrist. I couldn't believe it, five years of my life just gone in an instant. It took months before I could walk and even longer before I could dance again. Even now, I can't dance anywhere close to the way that I used to," you say with a watery smile. “Sojinnie had a concussion from the fall and Suminnie dislocated her shoulder, I must have knocked into them or fallen onto them or something. What could we do? Three out of the five of us were out of commission, there was no time and no budget for a group that hadn’t even debuted to find replacements or re-record and re-film everything. I woke up after surgery and they told me that they were sorry, but my contract with the company was over. That someone had helped me pack up all my things in the dorm. I went back to Jeju-do as soon as I was released from the hospital.”

"I- I'm sorry that I didn't know," Chan says, clearing his throat roughly when his voice breaks partway through the sentence. " I wish that I could have been there, to help or comfort you. I should have-"

"Oppa," you respond gently. "It's okay. I didn't tell anybody what happened and the company also kept things quiet. I'm glad you didn't find out at the time. You had other, more important things to focus on, I didn't want to distract you from that."

"You're not a distraction," Chan says incredulously. "You're important to me, I would have dropped everything to be with you in such a difficult time."

"And that's exactly why I couldn't tell you. You've always been too good to me, Channie-oppa," you sniffle. "Look at you now! I'm so always proud when I think of how far you've come."

Chan lifts a trembling hand and carefully cups your face, using his thumb to wipe away a tear that has started making its way down your cheek. He hears your breathing hitch, but you don't object to his touch. If anything, you melt into it.

Chan takes the opportunity to wrap his arms around you, bringing you close. The gesture breaks the dam of tears that you must have been holding back. Chan rocks the two of you back and forth gently, just letting you cry and trying to surreptitiously wipe away his own tears. It takes a few minutes before you calm, taking huge shuddering breaths that break Chan's heart almost as much as your sobs had.

"I'm sorry," you say with a voice thick with emotion.

"Hey, no," Chan reassures you. "There's no need to apologise. Are you feeling better now?"

You nod slowly, head still pressed against Chan's chest.

"I think- I think I just missed you. I always thought it would get easier, not having you in my life, but it never did."

At your words, Chan can't help his arms from tightening, squeezing you close.

"I finally found you again," he says. "And this time, I promise that I won't ever let you go."

read it on ao3 | masterlist

[buckyalpine]

Hello Shay ! I’ve been loving the civilian!reader fics, and I had an idea for a fic like that, but with a twist 🫣 reader is bucky’s sweet civilian gf, literal definition of sunshine, basically a lover, not a fighter. She’s a ballet teacher at a local studio (hint hint wink wink). And she lives with him and the team at the tower. One night, while the team is out on a mission, Hydra ambushes the tower and tries to take the reader hostage. And when they learn about it, they rush back home in order to save her. Meanwhile, Bucky and Tony check the footage just to see his precious sweet girl absolutely kicking ass. And I mean hardcore, like she even does the entire widow thigh-neck move. And everyone is like??? And Bucky’s just absolutely fucking HORNY bc “hell I’ve been in between those thighs so many times, you’re telling me I could’ve DIED???”

okay YESSSSS we live for a badass gf who appears to be nothing but sweet sunshine and killer on the inside. Fluffy fluffy and smutty smutty

-

"Be back soon, darling" Bucky cooed, kissing you again and again while everyone boarded the jet, getting in a few more pecks before having to leave on a mission.

"C'mon lover boy, the faster we get going, the faster you get back to your sweetheart!" Tony yelled, shaking his head watching Bucky look a you with puppy eyes, not wanting to leave his sunshine behind. "He's so down bad, I swear"

"Can you blame him, she's so cute" Sam smiled, watching the two of you cling onto each other for a few extra seconds, your form hidden, engulphed in Bucky's thick arms. "Look, you can't even see her when tin man hugs her"

"I'll miss you baby" you kissed Bucky's pouty lips, caressing his scruffy cheek before letting him run off, your cheeks heating up when he blew you another kiss before the doors closed.

"You're a little sap" Nat teased while Bucky blushed, strapping on his gear as the engine roared to life, rumbling as they took off. Bucky had 0 shame in everyone knowing how much he loved you and it started from the day he met you. He got called out immediately, questioned over the dopey smile he had on his face, the blush on his cheeks instantly giving him away.

Soon after you'd started dating, Bucky wanted you closer to him and he didn't have to ask Tony twice; his room was moved to a floor above so you'd have more space to live together. The last thing Bucky wanted was for you to get hurt because of his job. He felt more relaxed knowing you were in he safety of the compound on days where he was away.

"Who would've thought Bucky would be the romantic type"

"I did" Steve groaned, having seen Bucky's flirty side for years but he knew this was different. He hadn't seen his bestfriend like this before, clearly in utterly and desperately in love with you.

"It's adorable" Sam laughed while Bucky continued to smile, scrolling through his phone looking at pictures of you. His camera rolled was filled with various images of you baking, cuddling, sleeping, doing the most mundane things in the world, each making his heart flutter. He felt a pang in his chest, momentarily worried about if you were safe without him, the same anxiety he always felt whenever he had to leave you.

-

You stretched across the sofa, sipping on some hot chocolate and putting on your favorite comfort movie, deciding to have a relaxing night to yourself since the compound was empty. You didn't like when Bucky had to leave but you knew it was part of his job, slipping the fuzzy throw blanket over you shoulders before hitting play.

It had hardly been a few minutes before the screen went black making you blink, wondering if you'd sat on the remote by accident. Suddenly the rest of the lights turned off, a blasting sound coming from the entrance before you heard rushed footsteps nearing you.

Your heart started to race, having no time to hide or think, coming face to face with a number of masked men all towering over you. One grabbed you, pulling out a camera and hitting record, shoving it close to your face with a sinister smile.

"Look who we have, soldat"

-

The jet hadn't been flying for long, a sudden beeping alarm from the security system alerting Tony to check the cameras. His eyes grew wide, seeing the Hydra logo take over the screen before switching the live footage from the hacked system.

"Guys! There's been an attack on the compound!" Tony shouted from the computer, everyone rushing to see what came on screen, billows of smoke emitting from the main wing. Suddenly the screen went black, replaced with a man swearing a black mask, walking around the common room.

"Welcome Mr. Stark" His voice was thick with a Russian accent, the video panning to show the other agents infiltrating the tower. "Where is our soldat"

"You stay the fuck away from my girl" Bucky growled, his heart hammering in his chest, nearly crying when he saw someone grab you and shove you into a chair.

"She's precious to you, isn't she. We'll see you soon" he laughed, before the stream cut off leaving Bucky wanting to scream in frustrating, anxiety clouding all his thoughts, just wanting to get back to you to protect you.

"We have to go help her!" Bucky paced up and down while Tony rerouted the jet, speeding back to save you. "How the fuck do I know what's going on, there has to be something" He pleaded, hating that he no longer had eyes on you.

"Hold on, let me get into the back up feed" Tony tapped away at different keys, getting into the security system, selecting the camera for the common room where you were being held. "Here, I got it! I-Holy shit..."

The sound of screaming screeched through the speaker but it wasn't coming from you.

No.

"B-Barnes, you're girl just killed someone with her thighs" Tony stared at the footage with wide eyes while Bucky and the others watching in awe as your legs wrapped around one of the agents' heads, snapping his neck before flipping over and attacking another one of your assailants.

Bucky nearly choked, watching the men drop to the floor like flies, your arms and legs holding onto the men with a vice like grip until they fell, hardly breaking a sweat each time.

"Do you understand how many time's I've been in between those thighs, you're telling me she could've killed me?!!" Bucky practically moaned, seeing you fight, all his anxiety melting into lust, his cock straining against the thick material of his tac suit.

"Jesus Bucky, you're gonna poke an eye out" Sam's face scrunched up while Bucky adjusted himself, biting his lip to keep from making a sound, his tip leaking, breathing out a sigh of relief seeing you perfectly safe.

"Can't help me, look at her. Better count me out for movie night, m'gonna spent the whole night fuckin'-

"Okay, got it, you're a ridiculous, horny, pervert, and y/n probably won't walk for a week, will you please put that away" Sam shook his head, walking away when he tent in Bucky's pants got worse.

"I'm sorry, we've been housing a Hydra killer all this time?" Tony shook his head as the jet landed, still in disbelief over what everyone had just seen, both impressed and 100% scared of what else you were capable of. "You sure know how to pick em' Barnes"

As soon as the jet hit the floor, Bucky was sprinting off into he compound, running to find you, relief flooding his veins when he saw you sipping on your tea, seated on the couch again. You jumped up from your spot, jumping into your boyfriends arms, clinging onto him while the others also entered, glad to see you were okay. They got to work, clearing up the room, rounding up the few agents that were knocked out for questioning while also giving you and Bucky some privacy.

"Babygirl" Bucky hugged you tightly in his arms, burying his face into your neck, inhaling your soft scent, hoisting you up so your legs were wrapped around his waist. "Are you okay doll, are you hurt?"

"I'm fine Bucky" you reassured him, pecking his soft lips, letting him check you over before feeling satisfied you were okay, not finding a scratch on your body.

"Everything okay Buck?" you cocked your head noticing your boyfriends shift in demeanor, his soft baby blue eyes darkening into something else, biting his lip.

"Baby, I had to hold back from pulling my cock out on the jet and touching myself, you know how much that hurt? How hard I was the entire time, struggling not to jet my dick off watching how sexy you looked" He walked you up to your shared bedroom, his erection shamelessly pushing against your clothed core, not bothering to hide it one bit. "Where have you been hiding all that princess"

"Not hiding Bucky, just-never needed to do that" You shrugged shyly, squeezing your thigs around his waist playfully, making him groan as he dropped you on the bed.

"Can't wait to keep my face between these pretty legs that could kill me" He groaned, slicing your clothes off with his pocket knife before diving in without a care in the world, eating you like a man starved, tapping your thighs to wrap around his head.

"C'mon doll, squeeze em'" he moaned, humping against the bed feeling your muscles flex, his eyes rolling back, nearly cumming against the mattress at the strength he could feel, knowing you were holding back from hurting him.

you could kill him if you want.

Fuck, he was going to cum so fast.

-

"Oh god! Bucky!! PLease! D-DOn't STOP"

"That's it gorgeous, so good to me, so fuckin' pretty. won't last baby, gonna cum for you!"

"They're going at it like rabbits, didn't you sound proof their room after the first incident?"

"I did. This is after the sound proofing"

"Gonna fuck your thighs next baby, you got my cock so hard, almost creamed my pants like a teenager watching, you, oh shit-shit-m'so sensitive, keep clenching around my dick, that's it-fuckkk"

"Jesus christ, it's been an hour"

"Did you forget he has the super soldier serum? They're not gonna stop any time soon"

"I'M CUMMING JAMES"

"Gonna fucking cum for you y/n, OH FUCK YESSS you're so sexy when you fight baby, m'gonna fuckin' cum again, I can't stop"

"He's really gonna go all night, isn't he"

"Can you blame him?"

[mashtatosworld]

HII HII can u please do a gd x world-famed kpop idol?? like blackpink-famous iykwim!! and maybe reader being a "junior" in the industry? (eg. them coming from 3rd gen era like bp or basically js young) they met for the very first time at an event, and reader being his junior went excited "omg g dragon?? the G DRAGON???" basically.

idk where to go after that point but perhapss (an idea, take it with a grain of salt lolol) gd was actually lowkey a fan of her instead? like reader was a breathe of fresh air, very talented, on the rise in the industry (did a hollywood thing) or something !!! i hope this part isnt too OOC but UH basically do your magic author!! im going to love anything you write either wayyy xxxxx🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶

only girl

summary: in which you're both pretty in pink

You had to physically stop yourself from bouncing on the couch.

The air was thick with the scent of expensive cologne and faint cigarette smoke, a combination that somehow smelled exactly like you imagined he would.

Even after two weeks of your evenings spent here, sitting in G-Dragon’s studio still felt like a fever dream.

Your hands clenched into fists in your lap, trying to keep your excitement contained as Jiyong sat across from you, casually scrolling through his laptop as if this wasn’t the biggest moment of your career.

“This is the track,” he finally said, pressing play.

A deep bassline rumbled through the speakers, followed by a hypnotic melody. The beat was dark and sultry, unmistakably his sound, but then - your voice.

Your breath hitched.

He had already layered your demo vocals onto the song.

You glanced at him in disbelief, but Jiyong was watching you intently, one hand resting lazily against his lips.

“You like it?”

“Are you serious?” Your voice cracked slightly, betraying your nerves. “This is - this is insane. It’s so good.”

He smirked, pleased.

“I'm glad you agreed to work with me. I’ve been a fan of yours for a while,” he admitted casually, as if he hadn’t just shattered your entire perception of reality.

Your brain short-circuited.

“I- wait, really?”

Jiyong chuckled at your reaction. “You have this energy- ” he gestured vaguely, “- that the industry needs. It's addictive. This is your first solo project, right?”

You nodded, still processing the fact that he admitted to liking your music. You were a part of a girl group that were on the rise to success with a couple of hit songs.

The girls were currently on hiatus as they worked on their individual careers and this was the first time you'd worked on something without them. It was surreal that he chose you to feature on his comeback album after his years away from the spotlight.

“Well,” he leaned forward, eyes glinting, “let’s hope this is just the beginning.”

𓆩♡𓆪 𓆩♡𓆪 𓆩♡𓆪 Six months later, 2024 MAMA Awards:

You were trying very hard to keep a straight face.

Which was difficult, considering G-Dragon was standing directly in front of you, smiling that slow, knowing smile like he knew a secret no one else in the room did.

Because he did.

Your bandmates, however, were completely oblivious, practically vibrating as they struggled to remain composed. You were nearly hit in the face with a light stick.

“Holy shit, it’s actually him,” one of them whispered.

Your leader was the first to recover. “Ah! Sunbaenim! It’s an honour to meet you!”

Jiyong chuckled, bowing respectfully. “I’ve been meaning to say hello.”

As he rose, his eyes flickered to yours, just for a second.

No one else noticed, but you did.

That subtle flicker of amusement, that unspoken acknowledgment.

You had seen each other just last night.

And yet, here you were, pretending this was your first interaction.

“I’m a huge fan,” your youngest member gushed. “Like, actually. Huge.”

Jiyong smirked. “Oh?”

Your bandmate nodded rapidly. “We were literally just talking about your performance.”

Which was true.

Jiyong had just stepped off the stage after his first live performance in years, wearing a custom pink ensemble that had the entire room of idols buzzing.

And coincidentally…

You were wearing pink too.

Your stylist had handed you this dress earlier today, saying it would be “perfect for the show.” But you knew better.

This wasn’t a coincidence.

Jiyong planned this.

It was a silent, unspoken statement - one only the two of you understood.

Your bandmates, still too distracted by his presence, completely missed the way his fingers briefly grazed yours when he moved past you.

A touch so fleeting it almost didn’t happen.

Almost.

And then, just as quickly as he appeared, he was gone.

Your bandmate immediately turned to you, shaking your arm.

“Hello?! You love G-Dragon. Why aren't you screaming right now?!”

You blinked innocently.

“Oh, trust me,” you said, lips curling into a secretive smile.

“I was dying on the inside.”

𓆩♡𓆪 𓆩♡𓆪 𓆩♡𓆪

Your back hit the hotel suite’s wall with a soft thud, Jiyong’s mouth already on yours before the door had even clicked shut.

His hands found your waist, fingers pressing into the silky fabric of your dress - the pink dress - bunching it slightly as he pulled you closer.

“You looked so good tonight,” he murmured against your lips, voice husky.

You smiled into the kiss, fingers tangling in his pink hair.

“You planned it.”

Jiyong pulled back slightly, cocking a brow. “Planned what?”

You scoffed. “The outfits. You knew I’d match you.”

He grinned, shameless. “Maybe.”

You swatted his arm, but he caught your wrist, pressing a slow kiss to your palm before lacing his fingers with yours.

“You should’ve seen your face,” he mused, smirking. “Trying so hard to act normal.”

“You weren’t exactly subtle either,” you shot back. “The lingering looks? The hand touch? Jiyong, come on.”

He hummed in amusement, resting his forehead against yours.

“We’ve been careful for six months,” he murmured, thumb stroking the inside of your wrist. “You really think people are starting to notice?”

“Not yet,” you admitted. “But if you keep showing up to award shows looking like my soulmate, they might.”

Jiyong chuckled.

Then, softly - softer than you’d ever heard him - he murmured,

“Would that be so bad, Jagiya?”

Your breath caught.

This wasn’t just a secret fling anymore.

It was something else entirely.

𓆩♡𓆪 𓆩♡𓆪 𓆩♡𓆪

double dropping in one day? oops. im becoming consumed by tumblr 🤭

taglist: @petersasteria, @mirahyun , @allthoughtsmindfull , @gdinthehouseee , @infinetlyforgotten , @redhoodedtoad

[meanbossart]

Drizzt Do’Urden s basically a thing from the podcast/live dnd thing that Astarion's player/Voice actor made. Drizzt is a hella famous Drow singer/bard that Astarion is a huge fan boy of and made fanfiction for

EDIT: I know that Drizzt Do'Urden wasn't created for the podcast. I know that he's a ranger. I know that there are 80 books written about him. Good lord.

Was scrolling down my inbox (I'm still taking a little blog break until the new year, I appreciate everyone's patience) but I won't lie this one has been on my mind ever since the topic came up. Do I think the live DnD games are canonical? No, of course not. Neil isn't Astarion's writer and his knowledge about the character is limited to his interactions with said writer in the studio, and otherwise pretty much as valid as anyone else's whos played the game... HOWEVER.

Astarion did have 200 years worth of down-time whenever he wasn't seducing drunks at the pub or getting skinned and prodded on the dungeon floor. I doubt that the guy had the opportunity to hone in crafts or enjoy his hobbies, but Cazador couldn't keep all of them occupied 24 hours a day EVERY day. Astarion was exposed to common culture through the people he interacted with at the bars, he obviously knows who Drizzt Do'Urden is, as showcased in the game itself (he runs a dumb Drizzt joke through himself like a crazy person if you click his portrait enough.)

Anyway, my point is; either before, after, or throughout the process of working through the God's catalogue and begging salvation to each and every one, would Astarion indulge in a little escapism? News, books, folk tales, heroic figures...? Probably. I think most people would. And while he doesn't reveal much about his personal taste in partners, drow seems to be a race that he's fond of, at least aesthetically. He's also mentioned prince-like figures and youth.

I'm just picturing a poor, downtrodden Astarion collapsed in his stinky bunk-bed at night and fantasizing about a deep-voiced, charismatic drow and his big cat, who somehow hear word of the horrific injustices taking place inside a gothic abomination of a palace in the high-town of Baldur's Gate shortly before breaking through Cazador's stained-glass windows, lacerating him in ways far too gory to be in the man's character, before shortly sweeping him off his feet once taken by his unspeakable beauty. I don't think he imagines much of what happens past that point, I doubt Astarion finds himself and Drizzt Do'Urden to have much in common... But he sure has heard that he's handsome.

Would he have run this scenario - however thinly-veiled as a joke - through Dalyria in a particularly slow night, fully expecting her to laugh it off so he could continue saving face, only to instead be met to the most accidentally-patronizing little coo and "You know it's good to stay hopeful!" out of her that made Astarion want to wrap his hands around her throat and strangle her in the middle of that pub? Probably. Did she casually try opening up conversation with him about Drizzt' antics whenever she heard something new about the folk hero? Occasionally. Is it cute? Only as much as it's horrifically sad, LOL.

Anyway. I bet she had a laugh after he brought Do'Urden's juiced up cousin home to meet the family. He's going to hear about this for the rest of eternity.

DU drow gets the "It's just an inside joke that got out of hand" version of the story, and he believes it! Because what about Drizzt Do'Urden could POSSIBLY appeal to his lover, after all.