#avoids it - a.k.a someone comes in and interrupts

[berrythefish]

Me: uh I haven't animated in such a long time maybe I can do something small to get a feel again...

Me, later: wtf am I doing

[m00nkissedlover]

・｡the plan 💋

"i'm trying to kiss your lips for real" (inspred by the song "APT." by rosé and bruno mars)

regulus black x reader | word count: 1,348 words

summary: when you have a dream about regulus, dorcas and marlene work to make it a reality 💋

warnings: like one curse word. other than that, none! just fluff!

note: another regulus fic, yayyyy! (a.k.a: the reggie brainrot's really getting to me-) again, i apologize if this fic seems inaccurate. feel free to correct me on things or give feedback!

you were currently holed up on your dorm, covered in a bunch of blankets as you internally screamed and panicked. one would wonder, why were you in this state of hysteria? because you had a dream. but not just any dream. a dream about kissing someone. and that someone was...

"REGGIE?" dorcas yelled in disbelief, throwing her arms around the mound that was created by your body underneath the covers.

you mumbled something, but it was muffled by the blankets. "honey, we can't hear you." marlene said, sitting next to you.

you reluctantly poked your head out of the mound, immediately resting your head in her lap.

"what the hell am i supposed to do? i can't even look at regulus..." you repeated, your eyes fluttering shut as marlene gently played with your hair.

"oh, come on. yeah, it's embarrassing, but i bet it's not that bad." dorcas quipped, playfully poking your cheek.

"today, in potions class, he asked me to hand him a vial of something," you began, cringing at your actions.

"and?" marlene asked.

"i started coughing uncontrollably and pretended like i need to go to the infirmary. and when he offered to take me, i just....ran out of the room..." you admitted, covering your face with your hands.

"ooh, yeah, that's bad." dorcas said, earning herself a smack on the thigh from her girlfriend. "what? what did i say?"

"ignore dorcas. i'm sure if you just go and explain-!" you immediately cut marlene off, a slight look of horror forming on your face.

"you want ME to tell THE regulus black that i had a dream about kissing him? oh, yeah. 'hey reggie. sorry i've been so awkward around you lately. i just had a dream about sucking face and swapping spit with you.'" you said sarcastically. "do you know how embarrassing that would be?"

"if you would let me finish, bub," marlene said, glancing over at a giggling dorcas then back at you.

"obviously, you're not gonna tell him you dreamt about kissing him. just tell him....you've been having....thoughts about him." "that's even worse!" you exclaimed, sitting up out of her lap.

"then what do you suggest-" just then, a wicked little smirk found its way onto marlene's lips. you knew that look and you did not like it.

the blonde leaned over and whispered something into her girlfriend's ear, the two of them exchanging the same mischievous expression.

"whatever you two are planning, leave me out of it." "honey, you're the main character of what we're planning." dorcas giggled, making you curl up into your blanket mound once again.

it had been three days since your "talk" with dorcas and marlene. and things weren't getting even the slightest bit better. you were avoiding the poor boy like the plague. walking in the opposite direction when you saw him in the halls, making up excuses to leave early when you had to work together, even hiding behind a couch in the common room when he'd walk in. yet again, the girls tried to urge you to take some action, but you obviously refused. so, they had no choice but to take matters into their own hands.

it was a quiet afternoon and you were chilling with the others in the slytherin common room. barty and evan were lounging on the couch talking about god knows what, regulus looking up from his book to shoot them a judgmental side eye. dorcas and marlene were talking by the window and you sat with pandora and lily, complaining about whatever classes you had next.

your conversation was interrupted by marlene and dorcas walking over and taking lily's and pandora's hands into their own.

"sorry to interrupt, but it's time for us to go. we have things to do." marlene said, pulling lily along.

"what things?" pandora asked, earning herself a sharp look from dorcas.

"you know: the thing and that other thing." she said, sounding completely confident. it took a few seconds for pandora and lily to get the picture.

"ah, the thing! yeah, we gotta go do that! uh, barty, evan. could you two come help us?" lily asked, opening the door. the two boys were obviously in on whatever this was, giggling like little children as they followed the girls out.

"uh, regulus and i can help-!" "nope, no need! i mean, six people should be able to deal with it! byeeeee!" marlene yelled, slamming the door shut.

you were completely dumbfounded as you stared at the door, jumping out of your skin as you heard the dark haired slytherin speak behind you.

"i knew that lot of idiots was up to something." he sighed, sinking back into the couch. you bit back a laugh, trying to ignore your clammy palms and the ever growing knot in your stomach as you sat next to him, a few feet between you two.

"yeah, they're....always up to something...." you muttered, your heart hammering so loudly in your ears, you didn't even realize regulus had been telling you something till he nudged your arm.

"hm?" you muttered, widening your eyes a little to signal you were listening this time.

"what is going on with you? you've been acting strangely lately-" no, you did not want to have this conversation. you needed to get out of here. now.

"you know, they might need some help," you said, moving to get up. as you did, regulus caught your wrist, a frown on his lips.

"you're not going anywhere until you explain yourself. i know you've been avoiding me on purpose." ah, shit.

you reluctantly sat back down, fidgeting with your fingers as you avoided eye contact. "promise you won't think i'm weird?"

regulus raised an eyebrow, finally nodding his head and muttering a quick "promise."

"recently i had a dream-"

"so you've been avoiding me....because of a dream you had?" regulus cut you off and you could already see his ears turning red.

"w-wait, it's not like that!" you exclaimed, covering your face with your hands and groaning.

regulus blinked as he watched you crumble in embarrassment, a slight smile forming on his lips. "well....then what was the dream about?"

you took a breath, looking away from him, your hands now gripping the cushions of the couch. "it was about...us. we were....we were kissing, okay?"

there was a moment of silence between the two of you, regulus obviously taken aback. "kissing?"

"yeah. you...you leaned in and kissed me and...it felt so real. i almost wished it was." you admitted, finally turning your head to look him in the eyes. "i like you, regulus black. and i want to kiss you...for real."

regulus felt like his heart would burst, his eyes shaking a little as he coughed awkwardly, looking at his lap, then back at you. "you really want to kiss me?"

"right now....more than anything." before you could even get another breath out, regulus was in your space, hand cupping your cheek. the cold touch of his silver rings against your cheek made you shiver a little. your breath hitched, your eyes gazing into his pretty gray ones.

"glad to hear it. because i," he leaned in a bit closer, his lips hovering over yours. "want to kiss you too."

the kiss was short and sweet, lasting a few seconds before regulus pulled away, your eyes locking. you felt a warmth flood your heart, the way he looked at you making your lips curve up into a smile. you wordlessly leaned back in, your fingers knotting into his curly forest of hair. this time, the kiss was slow and slightly passionate, jolts of joy and pleasure running through your body.

when the two of you separated again, you were both smiling like idiots, a hue of pink coloring regulus's cheeks. "looks like their plan worked after all." you murmured, causing regulus to raise an eyebrow.

"what plan?" he mused as a bit of laughter left your lips.

"don't worry about it." you hummed, closing the gap between you two once more. you'd definitely have to thank dorcas and marlene later. 💋

© m00nkissedlover, 2024

[sapphirefallschronicles]

- ̥۪͙۪˚┊❛ Welcome to Sapphire Falls - chapter 24 ❜┊˚̥۪͙۪◌

Basketballer!Chris Evans x Abigail Syverson (plus size!ofc) & Farmer!Syverson x Livia Darmandi (Asian ofc)

Summary: Abigail and Chris finally talk, just like Sy and Livia have a heart to heart.

Word count: 2.9k

Warnings: None

The Advent Calendar (a.k.a. the masterlist)

After the debacle at the Christmas fair, I go straight to the place that brings me comfort. The demonic goats. It still baffles me how Sy thinks they are truly demonic, but that might be because I have set them up against him. I should start talking nice things about him to them, because they can’t give him a hard time once I leave this place. 

But first I need their advice. 

Once again.

‘Do you think Chris and I can be together one day?’ I ask as I scratch Honey behind her ears. She bleats loudly before jumping off to annoy her mother. ‘You’re no help,’ I tell her. ‘Why is the universe so set on ruining my chance to be with him? You’d think three times is a charm, but we have almost kissed three times now. And every time we got interrupted. Maybe we aren’t meant to be together after all. Maybe I should give up,’ I sigh. 

Honey comes rushing back, begging for more scratches. 

‘You think I should give him another chance? I don’t know if I can do that.’ Tears start to form in my eyes, and I feel like such an idiot. ‘What’s wrong with me? Why do I always have to be second best? I cannot live a life where I feel like the ex fiance is always around the corner.’

All of a sudden I hear someone scraping their throat behind me. Quickly I turn around, to see Chris. 

‘How long have you been standing there?’ I ask, wiping away the tears. Apparently I had not heard a thing in the last few minutes, because I see his truck parked in our driveway.

He walks closer to me, but I hold up my hand, needing space between us. I need room to think, but I can’t do that with him so close to me. 

‘Abi,’ Chris says, ‘that text, it was Bethany telling me she had cleared my house from her stuff.’

That was unexpected. ‘What?’

‘She’s gonna leave. I told her we’re never gonna work and that she needs to get her stuff out of my house.’ He smiles and says: ‘She’s blocked. She’s banned from my life. Forever.’

‘I don’t… I don’t get it.’ I’m having a hard time comprehending what is happening. Is he saying what I hope he is saying?

‘She is gone. She finally understood I don’t want her in my life, and she only texted me to tell me she had collected her stuff from my house and left the key.’ Chris slowly closes the gap between us, and I let him. 

‘Because all I need is you, Abigail Syverson.’

I have always hated crying in front of people, therefore avoiding it like hell, but I can’t help myself right now. Tears stream down my face, not sad tears, more like I-can’t-believe-this-is-happening-tears. 

‘Really?’ I choke out. Chris is now in front of me, only an inch between us. He gently removes my hands from my face, and takes them in his. 

‘Yeah,’ he says softly, placing his hand on my cheek, wiping the tears away. 

‘Why?’ 

He barks out a laugh, and pulls me even closer to him. ‘I confess my love to you, and you ask why?’

‘I mean, you can be with someone like Bethany, why would you want to be with me? I’m not her, I don’t even remotely look like her. I’m not in your world, I bet there are other girls who are. Who fit in.’ I see a look of hurt in Chris’ eyes, and while I don’t want to personally ruin the moment I have always dreamt of, I have to express my concerns. 

I have loved Chris Evans for so long, and now that I can get him, I start wondering what life with him would be like. I’d have to go with him, to Chicago, which I would love. But do I fit in that world full of superstars and supermodels?

‘Stop that,’ Chris says, he places his other hand on my face as well, and makes me meet his gaze. ‘You are nothing like her, because you are so much more. You are funny, kind, caring, sweet, talented. And you are so beautiful.’ He presses a kiss to my forehead. ‘Your smile lights up a room, your eyes are my favorite color.’ A kiss on my nose. ‘And I can talk for hours about what your body does to me,’ he ends, his voice darkening. 

He presses his forehead against mine, and we stand like that for a moment. My tears had stopped, and I wrap my arms around his neck. 

‘So, you think you like me back?’ Chris softly nudges his nose against mine. 

‘Ever since you held my hand in third grade,’ I chuckle and I close my eyes as he leans in, his lips hovering inches from mine. 

‘I’ve been wanting to do this for so long,’ he whispers, his voice low and husky.

‘Me too.’ My own voice barely above a whisper.

And finally we closed the gap between us. After all these years, after all these attempts, we finally kiss. It is everything I hoped for. My entire body is on fire, and I feel like I’m flying. 

Chris’ hands are everywhere, and so are mine. His hard body is flush against mine, and before I know it a moan escapes my mouth. 

And the sound he made following that, sent shivers down my spine. ‘‘Maybe we need to go somewhere, you know, private,’ I whisper in between our kisses. 

Chris hums in response, still pressing kisses on my jaw, neck, cheeks, lips. ‘Let’s go upstairs.’

I’m about to agree, when I suddenly realize something. ‘Fuck, no. Sy’s home, I think.’

Chris stops kissing my neck, and grabs my hand to pull me with him, out of the barn. ‘We’re going to my hotel. I mean, if you want to?’ He waits for my answer, and when I tell him yes, we make a run for his truck. 

●・○・●・○・●

A few hours later I wake up next to Chris. In his hotel room. In his bed. With my head on his naked chest. Am I dreaming? 

I realize I am not dreaming, but am wide awake. A grin as wide as possible forms on my face. If you’d told me a month ago that Chris Evans and I would express our love for each other, I would have laughed in your face. 

But now, I feel a happiness I never felt before. Slowly I draw circles with my finger over his tattooed chest. Mine. 

He stirs a little, and I feel him placing his hand on the swell of my back. The sun is slowly disappearing, painting orange and red strokes on the wall. 

‘Hi baby,’ he hums, pressing a kiss to my shoulder. He sits up a little bit, so we’re eye to eye again. I definitely can get used to this. 

A smile forms on my face, and without hesitation I lean forward to peck his lips. I never felt comfortable enough to do so with previous partners, but with Chris? It feels like it was meant to be. 

‘You look beautiful.’ He wraps me in his arms, and we lay like that in silence for a moment. 

‘Would you come to Chicago with me?’ Chris breaks the silence. 

‘Is it weird if I started packing my bags mentally already?’

‘Please tell me you’re not bringing all your plants with you,’ he laughs. ‘I doubt I have the space for that.’

I smile, but think about his question in the meanwhile. Yes, I want to go with him. Yes, I would love to go to Chicago. But what would that look like? Will I move in with him immediately? I don’t think I’m ready to go from nothing to basically married. 

‘Chris?’ I say.

‘Mhm?’

‘Can we take it slow?’

Chris props himself up on his elbow, to get a better look on my face. He smiles softly, and nods, encouraging me to elaborate. 

‘I just want us to take our time to get to know each other like this. Enjoy every step of this way.’ I place my hand on his face, and he presses a kiss to the palm of my hand. ‘I don’t want to rush into this.’

‘As long as I get to spend time with my favorite person, you. I will take all the time you, we, need, okay? There is no need to rush things. We have a lifetime ahead of us.’’ He pulls me in his arms, kisses me tenderly, and we won’t leave the bed till the sun rises again.

I don’t know how much time went by, but my arms feel sore by the time I actually take a break. Maybe I’m not fuming anymore, but damn I’m still pissed. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so angry. That idiot and my Liv left the bar.

There had been times where I was angry, maybe even jealous when someone else spoke to her, but I could be rational about it. But this is different. Fuck, this was totally different.

‘Is there a reason, Caleb Syverson, you’ve been ignoring my calls?’

Her voice. 

‘Sorry,’ I mutter, without looking up. 

Footsteps come closer and she stands in front me. Her black platform boots are covered in sand and a little bit of mud. ‘Are you okay?’

‘Do I look okay?’

‘Want an honest answer?’

I finally look up, only to see her looking serious and her default state of sadness still present. ‘Go for it.’

‘You look like shit,’ she tells me. ‘And for that I’m sorry. That was my fault, Ian’s fault.’

I stand up and tower over her, even with a few feet between us. ‘Why did you even go with him?’ I ask her, my tone a lot harsher than I intended. ‘You just told me he was your ex and all of the sudden you’re taking him to the doctor?’

Livia blinks her eyes, almost like she’s confused by what I said. ‘Well duh,’ she says. ‘Of course I had to check whether or not he had an internal bleeding. It’s you versus him, Sy. Do you really think I have to check on you, when you didn’t even have a scratch and I had no idea if he was vomiting blood or if it was his lip leaking?’

Okay, she makes an excellent point.

‘You know,’ she continues, ‘after I took him to the doctors and it turned out he was completely fine, just peachy, I told him we’re over. That he and I never worked and that nothing could ever change my mind.’ 

‘Oh.’

‘He understood and we’re over.’

We both don’t say a thing, however she’s the one who breaks the silence.

‘I wasn’t lying, you know,’ she continues. ‘I really wished we didn’t spend so long apart. I hate how you didn’t have me forever.’

I clench my jaw, but that’s mostly because I have know idea how to respond to this. Back at the bar I knew, I wanted to further elaborate once we were talking, but then Ian happened.

And now words just don’t flow. 

‘You know, I hate myself everyday for not coming back,’ Livia says. ‘Because while New York City was great for me and my writing career, I never was truly happy. I set foot in Sapphire Falls and I realize that you have always been my reason for happiness.’

My vocabulary has been reduced to zero percent, because I still have no clue what to say to her and this revelation of hers. 

‘It’s always been you, Sy,’ Livia says. ‘The reason I never said that to you, is because I didn’t want to lose the greatest friend I’ve ever had. The things you and I could discuss, that meant so much to me. I saw how my parents’ relationship barely worked and I was afraid I was too much of a Darmandi and would end up like them. That I would screw up whatever we had.’

‘Liv,’ I manage to say, finally finding my voice back, ‘you know you could never screw up. Come on, if someone had to do that, it would’ve been me. We’re talking about me.’ I rub my hand over my short hairs.

‘But don’t you see that I have always been the one to hold you at arm's length?’ Livia sighs and says: ‘We kissed, prom night happened and what not. I had a taste, but every time I thought about getting closer, developing a real relationship with the one I truly loved, I backed out. I was scared.’

Livia runs her fingers through her hair and I can see she’s gently pulling it, before she does that one thing that tells me how uncomfortable she is: she pats herself on the head again. 

I hate seeing her in distress like that. 

She chews on her bottom lip and whispers: ‘Sy, I’m so sorry.’

‘Why are you sorry?’

‘Because I yet again screwed up.’ 

I detect some tears collecting in her eyes. 

‘Come here,’ I say, pulling her gently in my arms. Livia, always our little and tiny Livia, buries her face in my chest and whispers soft apologies. ‘Stop that.’

‘What?’ she asks. ‘Stop crying? How do you think I can just do that?’

Realizing I phrased it wrong, I whisper: ‘No, stop apologizing. You have nothing to feel sorry about and there is no need to feel sad and cry. It’s always been you too, Liv. I… No woman is ever good enough, not when I know there is you.’

She places her chin on my chest and through her tears looks at me. ‘You waited eleven years for me?’ she asks. 

‘Yeah, I guess I did.’

‘Damn you, Sy, that’s the sweetest thing ever.’ She wiggles herself out of my arms and wipes away her tears. ‘How do I compete with that?’

‘It’s not a competition,’ I tell her. ‘Liv, know that we’re not competing for who is the most romantic. All I care about is that I never lose you again. Because I don’t know if I can handle that.’

She’s shaking and I feel so bad that all these emotions are coming out like this. All the anger I felt just minutes earlier dissolves like that. ‘Caleb Syverson,’ she whispers, ‘I love you so much.’

I never expected to hear those words from her ever again. Those important words coming from her lips. And yet, here it happens. ‘Livia Darmandi,’ I say, ‘I can safely say: I love you more.’

Despite her tears, she lets out a laugh. ‘Took me eleven fucking years to realize that.’

I take a step towards her, gently hold her face in my hands and use my thumb to wipe away the tears. I press a kiss on her forehead and she relaxes against me. ‘That’s okay,’ I whisper against her forehead.

‘Don’t ever let me go,’ she says in a pleading tone.

‘Of course not,’ I tell her. ‘How about you kiss me, Liv?’

She stands on her toes, fisting my lumberjack blouse in her hands before she presses her lips on mine. Eleven years passed, eleven years since our last kiss, but I finally get to kiss her again. I pick her up and gently place her on the nearby wooden fence, so she doesn’t crane her neck and I don’t turn into a hunchback. She locks me in between her legs and from her eagerness I can tell she doesn’t want to let go.

But neither do I.

I finally have her back. 

●・○・●・○・●

After we eventually managed to break apart our kisses, we took a bit of a walk, her hand securely in mine. We walked passed Sapphire Lake, all the barns we had and the stables, almost like I wanted to show every animal that this woman is mine now and that there is no way I would ever let her go.

We stop in front of the shed. In these last few years, I’ve taken good care of this place. Abigail often said I should rent it out, but I can’t. I can’t rent out the place with one of my most sacred memories. ‘Remember prom night?’

‘You think I could forget?’ I ask her. ‘You’re my first and the only one I care about.’

She leans against me and I press her a kiss on top of my head. I gently tug her with me, as I unlock the door. As she walks passed me, for a second I’m back years ago. Almost like she never left, as she makes herself comfortable on the bed. Smiling, at ease and so beautiful.

I plop next to her and she smiles. For the first time in forever, I don’t see her anguish, her sadness. 

She’s serene. 

‘Are you happy, Liv?’

‘Happiest I’ve ever been in my life. I realized I’ve done nothing but chase hopes and dreams, when all I had to do was to chase you.’

I give her a kiss on her forehead. ‘It was worth the wait,’ I tell her. 

‘Sy, can you promise me to never let me go?’ she asks in a soft tone, nuzzling her face in my chest. ‘There is a one hundred percent chance I can’t live without you.’

I shake my head, wrapping my arm tightly around her. ‘I’m never letting you go, ever again.’

●・○・●・○・●

[marjansmarwani]

safe place to land

4.7k || ao3 • Chapter 1/2

Carlos was having the day from hell and he just wanted to talk to his boyfriend about it. Unfortunately, said boyfriend was currently missing and all Carlos could do was worry about him, or find him. But it really wasn’t a choice: he would always come for TK, no matter what.

a.k.a Carlos and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day (a 2x08 coda)

Absolutely huge shout out to @officereyes who not only helped me come up with the idea but also helped me with a lot of the plot points. And also to max for talking me through the finer points of concussions, but that will be more relevant in chapter 2 (which will be up Friday, probably). 

Anyways, Carlos may have gotten the screen time he deserved in the last episode but I am still going to give him more anyways, because I can. Title is from “Honest Man” by Ben Platt. 

-----------

Carlos avoided eye contact with everyone as he exited the precinct. He could feel their stares: some sympathetic, some judgmental. He knows they all know. He knew that it had been the talk of the precinct in the hours he had been confined to the interrogation room. He knew they all had an opinion on it, and he was pretty sure he knew what most of them were saying. 

He didn’t have to guess what his father thought, at least. That was made perfectly clear. 

He stepped through the doors of the precinct with a sigh of relief, feeling like he had just run the gauntlet. The bright afternoon sunlight threw him even more, it should have been dark when he left today. It’s another reminder of how far from usual this all is, of how much his world has been rocked by one split-second decision. Of how much that one decision could cost him. 

He climbed into his car with a weary sigh, resting his head in his hands as he took a deep, measured breath. His world was falling apart around him; everything he had worked for was crumbling like dominos set off by one act of compassion. He just wanted to forget it all, but that wasn’t possible. He didn’t want to dwell on Mitchell’s outright disapproval or her cold silence on the way back to the precinct. He would give almost anything to never have to relive the stern looks of his superiors, the shame of being asked to hand over his badge and gun. Most of all he would give anything to forget the look of disappointment in his father’s eyes, so convinced that he had been right about his son, that Carlos needed saving now from himself.

He lifted his head and looked back at the precinct, the crushing feeling of shame pressing on him from all sides. He had possibly ruined everything all because he wanted to see the best in someone. He wanted to believe he hadn’t been taken advantage of, that he hadn’t been naive and fallen for a well-rehearsed sob story, but it was getting harder and harder to cling to that hope by the second. Maybe his dad was right. Maybe he had always been right. Maybe Carlos wasn’t cut out to be a cop after all. 

He was pulled out of his spiral by the feeling of his phone vibrating in his jacket pocket. He pulled it out to see a text from TK: a simple confirmation that he had made it to the station. Just that momentary distraction was enough to interrupt his cascading anxious thoughts, to pull him back to reality. Nothing had been decided yet, he reminded himself. It may not be as bad as it all seems. 

He wasn’t sure what was going to happen, but he did know who he needed to talk to. So he started his car and pulled out of the parking lot, heading to the firehouse and the one person who could always talk him out of his own head. 

------------

TK hadn’t been at the firehouse when Carlos arrived, which shouldn’t have surprised him as much as it did. Why should he have expected anything to go right today? 

Instead, he had had what was possibly his longest one-on-one conversation with his boyfriend’s father over green smoothies and had managed to spill all of his problems to the older man within a matter of minutes. He hadn’t really been meaning to tell him about getting suspended and he had definitely not intended to discuss his tense relationship with his father, but something had snapped in his mind it seemed and he no longer had the ability to keep these things bottled up. Maybe it was something about the firehouse — Carlos had always felt welcome there, comfortable even. Maybe that had been enough to lower his guard. Maybe it was simply the kind face of Owen Strand. For all the problems he knew TK had been having with his dad lately and for all the reservations Carlos personally had about the other man, there was no denying that Captain Strand was an empathetic soul, when he allowed himself to be. 

Maybe it was simply a matter of the walls of his mind being battered for too long — worn more and more with each passing day — that this newest addition to fears and insecurities he kept so fiercely guarded was one too many and had forced his defenses to finally break. If that was the case he supposed he should consider himself lucky. At least it had been with someone he knew and trusted instead of a random passerby or grocery store clerk.

Whatever the reason, it had helped. Owen’s words had helped to ease his worry and return some of his confidence to him. He had felt much better about it all, until his father had called. 

He had left the firehouse with a promise from Owen that he would tell TK he had stopped by before heading back to the precinct, once again ignoring the stares of his coworkers and trying to not feel affected by the indignity of needing an escort to head to the conference room. For a moment, he thought it would be alright. His dad was there and the man he had seen earlier was sitting on the other side of the glass. He had corroborated Carlos’s story, everything he had told them proved that Carlos’s instincts were correct and his actions justified. For a moment he thought everything was fine, but he was wrong. His dad still didn’t believe in him. He still thought that Carlos was a liability, that he was too soft to do the job. 

He didn’t say it, but Carlos had spent a lifetime reading between the lines of his dad’s words. 

Maybe it was exhaustion or frustration hitting the boiling point. Maybe he was bolstered by Owen’s words from early, by the unwavering faith his boyfriend’s father had in him that his own father couldn’t manage to replicate, but Carlos was done hiding things. He told his dad exactly what he thought, and then he left. He stormed out of the precinct and got right into his car before driving home. 

He barely wasted a moment when he stepped through his front door, only pausing long enough to shed his coat and drop his keys into the dish by the door before he entered his kitchen, pulling open cupboards in search of the ingredients he needed. Cooking had always calmed him, it had always been a way to manage his stress and ease his mind. He desperately needed some of that today. 

He paused for a moment before he made up his mind, crossing to the rarely used cupboard above the fridge. He opened it and pulled out the pasta press that lived there, always present but hardly ever used because while he may love the result of handmade pasta it took far more time than he usually had to spare. 

It seemed he had plenty of it today, however. Maybe even for the foreseeable future. Besides, he needed something to take his mind off everything that had happened today and desperate times called for desperate measures. 

He mixed the eggs, flour, oil, and salt together in a large bowl as he let his mind wander. He still needed to tell TK about all of this, he realized. In all of their ins and out today, they kept missing each other. It wasn’t something he wanted to do over a text or a phone call though, so it would have to wait until he was here. Carlos assumed he would come here after his shift — he did, more often than not — but he paused in his mixing long enough to grab his phone. Dinner tonight? he typed into their text thread, followed by the pasta emoji. He received a “sounds great!” and a thumbs up in return and felt a smile return to his face. At least with TK coming for dinner, he was guaranteed to have at least one good part of this day. 

He returned to the task at hand, pulling the beginnings of the dough out of the bowl and placing it on the counter where he started kneading it. He still couldn’t believe everything that had transpired today. When he had left this morning the possibility of running into a suspected bank robber strapped to a bomb and getting suspended had never even crossed his mind. Nor had getting the confirmation that his dad didn't believe in him, but here he was. 

He hit the dough a little harder, the look of grim acceptance in his father’s eyes flashing through his mind once again. He loved his father and he knew that his father loved him; that had never been a question. But there was a difference between loving someone and believing in them, and that was the gray area he and his father existed in. He had always known, deep down. He knew that his father thought he felt things too strongly, that he was too emotional to do the job. That he was a naive bleeding heart waiting for the next lost cause to come around the corner. The worst part was that in so many ways, he was right. Carlos did care too much, he did always strive to see the best in people. He had never seen that as a weakness. Clearly, his father felt otherwise. 

He finished kneading with a sigh, wrapping the dough up in plastic wrap and setting it to rest on the counter as he turned to the cutting board full of vegetables and herbs waiting to be chopped for the sauce. He picked up the knife and started in on the garlic, letting his mind wander once again. His father hadn’t been the only one to show outright disappointment in him today, but that had been less surprising. That didn't change the fact that it had stung. These were people he worked beside on a daily basis, some for years. They were the people he was supposed to trust with his life. 

Generally, he did. He didn’t think that they were bad people or that they would ever not have his back in the field. He had always known that in many cases, they saw the world around them in different ways, but he had never expected it to become a problem quite in the way it has. He couldn’t pretend that the look of disappointment from his Captain — someone he had admired for years — hadn’t stung. 

He was snapped back to the task at hand when his knife slipped and a curse was torn from his lips by the sharp pain of a cut across his thumb. He pulled his hand away quickly, placing his other hand under it to prevent the blood from dripping onto the food as he crossed to the sink. He ran it under water and examined it. It was long and crossed the knuckle which would make it hurt like hell, but it didn’t look too deep, thankfully. He would wrap it for now and TK could look at it when he got home. Which wasn’t strictly necessary, but he knew his boyfriend would insist. Becoming a paramedic had only increased that particular inclination. Not that Carlos could say he particularly minded; it made TK feel better and Carlos was never one to deny his boyfriend anything that would put his mind at ease. 

He made quick work of bandaging his hand before putting on some music and returning to the task at hand. He tossed the vegetables in the pan to simmer and begin to form a sauce while he turned his attention to the dough. He tried not to dwell on the disaster that today had been as he rolled it out. Instead, he tried to let himself get lost in the process, threading the dough through the press carefully and laying the fresh pasta on a paper towel next to the stove. He checked on the sauce next to find that it had come together nicely and lowered the burner to keep it warm while he waited. He busied himself setting the table, throwing himself into putting together a far more elaborate table than was necessary for a Monday night in the interest of giving himself something to do that would silence all the doubts and questions in his head. 

At one point he glanced at the clock on the stove and frowned. TK should have been here by now. He grabbed his phone and sent out a quick text before returning to his project. It wasn’t until he had done every single thing he could think of without hearing the familiar sound of keys in the door that he started to worry. He grabbed his phone again, leaning against the counter as he tapped the name at the top of his recent calls. It rang for what seemed like an eternity before TK’s voicemail answered. 

“Hey,” he said into the phone, “I was just wondering if you were on your way here. You’re running later than usual so I figured I’d check, but I guess you’re still on a call or something. Just give me a call when you get this, I guess?” 

He hung up the phone after that, settling at the counter with a glass of wine as he waited. He managed about 20 minutes before he tried calling again only to get his voicemail, again. It had been almost an hour and he was officially worried. He said as much in a text, anxiously staring at his phone hoping for those three dots to appear. They didn’t and Carlos finally caved, getting up from the counter and crossing over to the table where he blew out the candles before turning off the stove and grabbing his coat. 

The last thing his mind needed tonight was something else to worry about, but this was a fear that hit differently. This was one that no amount of pasta making could soothe away. So he grabbed his keys and stepped out into the night, heading off to find answers and hopefully his errant boyfriend. 

--------------

Just like that all the anxiety and fear he had felt since the call with the unwilling bank robber seemed so trivial, all it took was a few words from Grace and the sight of some bloody rags in a van. TK was in danger: real, horrifying, life or death danger, and not one of the things that had been weighing on him all day was enough to top that. All day he had felt weighed down with worry, had been dealing with his anxiety eating away at him. But this fear, this tangible threat to the person he loved more than anyone else engulfed him; constantly pressing on him from all sides. There was no escaping this one. No amount of cooking or wine would make this go away. The only thing that could make him feel better, that would let him breathe easier again would be finding TK safe and unharmed. 

Carlos could tell that Owen was having a similar dilemma beside him as they drove to the parking garage in tense silence. He wasn’t sure what had been worse: his own hesitant worry and the nagging feeling that something was wrong being confirmed, Owen’s typically ironclad composure slowly cracking before his eyes, or Gwyn’s outright fear. For some reason, he thought it was Gwyn.

He had gotten to know her well since her arrival in Austin: first as TK healed and she tended to him and then later as he spent time around the Strand house. He had come to know her as someone unflappable. He had seen her excuse herself in the middle of lunch to ream out the head of a major corporation over the phone about a stupid decision he had made that could put him in danger of breaching a contract and turn back to their previous conversation without missing a step. He had never imagined he would see her even close to losing her composure, ever. But he had almost seen it in the entryway to the house, her fear for her son and the guilt that she might have had a part in it pushing her towards the edge. She had seemed calmer when they left, closer to the steady woman Carlos had come to know, but she didn’t know what was really happening. If she did, he doubted she would be so calm.

TK needed to be okay, Carlos decided as he glanced back at Owen who was clutching the steering wheel far more tightly than necessary. His safety and well-being was far too important to too many people — Carlos included. Losing his job and disappointing his father was one thing, losing TK was entirely another, and it was something Carlos never wanted to face. Especially not like this. 

He anxiously ran his bandaged thumb over TK’s sobriety chip as they drove. He wondered how scared TK must have been to willingly part with it. It was a representation of everything he had worked for, it was something he was so proud of. For him to leave it as a breadcrumb, with no possible guarantee it would ever be found or that he would ever see it again, he must have been terrified and that thought more than anything else filled Carlos with dread. He wanted to say he was sure about this, but the reality was that he wasn't sure at all. It was merely a desperate hope, but if there was even a chance he could find TK he was going to take it.

The truck carried them closer and closer to their destination in complete silence as the two men sat engrossed in their own thoughts, but Carlos was pretty sure he knew what they both were thinking: TK needed to be okay. No other option was acceptable. 

---------------

TK had been whisked off for an exam and scans the moment the ambulance arrived, leaving Carlos in the waiting room. He had barely taken a seat before his phone had started ringing and it was at that moment that he realized the rest of the 126 crew had no idea that anything had even been wrong. Anxious calls from both Marjan and Paul later told him that the rest of the crew had no idea what had happened, until they saw it on the news. They had gotten the gist from the news report and had seen footage of TK being loaded into an ambulance and they were concerned, to say the least. 

Once Carlos had been allowed back to see him he snapped a photo of a miserable, bandaged TK trying for a smile as proof of life and put it in the group chat with a promise that once he was discharged and feeling a little more steady, they could come over and harass him for managing to find so much trouble. He read their responses to TK as they waited for the doctor to come by with the results of his scans, running a soothing hand up and down his arm the entire time. 

That’s how TK’s parents find them, arriving at the hospital after Owen went back to pick Gwyn up and actually explain to her what happened. Carlos is sure it had been a fun conversation, judging by the tense looks on both their faces when they entered the room, but any tension on Gwyn’s face melted the moment she saw her son.

“Oh, honey,” she said softly, eyes filling with tears as she crossed to the side of the bed. Carlos moved from his spot by TK without a word and slipped into the chair at the side of the room, giving TK’s parents some room to be with him. There were quiet words and whispered affections between mother and son as Owen hovered at the foot of the bed, watching them fondly. Eventually the dynamic shifted to something closer to their usual when Gwyn pulled a container out of her purse. 

“Really Mom?” TK asked with a dubious look, “where did you even get that?” 

“We stopped on the way,” Owen explained, “she insisted.” He must have caught Carlos’s puzzled look because he explained, “Matzo ball soup.” 

Carlos grinned even as TK tried to roll his eyes, but broke off with a hiss of pain. All eyes turned to him anxiously but he gave them a small smile, “I’m fine, I just tried to move my head too much.” 

“And I still fail to see how your soup is going to help heal that,” Owen quipped to Gwyn, who glared at him. The pair started into their usual banter as TK did his best to follow along while obediently eating the soup his mother had handed to him. Carlos watched the whole scene with a fond smile, even as he kept a watchful eye on TK. His boyfriend caught his eye at one point and gave him a soft smile before being pulled back into his parents’ conversation. Eventually, Owen and Gwyn left and it was just TK and Carlos again. 

“Why are you still over there?” TK asked him before the door had even fully closed behind his parents. “Don’t make me come to you.” 

Carlos chuckled and crossed the room, sliding back into his spot on the bed, and leaned down to press a soft kiss at the edge of the bandages, “Wouldn’t dream of it.” 

He leaned back then to study him more closely. His face was drawn and pale and there was no denying that he was in pain but considering everything, he looked okay. “How do you feel?” he asked him, resting a hand on his arm, “really?” 

“I am in a lot of pain, but I’m fine, really. It could have been much worse, considering everything.”

Carlos swallowed and the hand resting on TK’s arm squeezed tighter, “yeah, it could have been.” 

It was the thought that had kept him company in the waiting room as he had fielded calls from their friends and as he had sat off to the side as TK’s parents had had their time with him. It could have been so much worse, it nearly had been. From what he had heard at the scene and put together since there were a thousand ways it could have gone wrong and a hundred that could have taken TK away from him. He had known he loved the other man for months now, he had long since realized what an integral part of his life he had become. But never in any of that time had he come quite as close to the possibility of losing him for good as he had today and it terrified him. 

But TK didn’t need that on his mind so he said nothing. Instead, he asked, “Any word on how long you’ll have to be off work?” 

“No,” TK griped, “but I would imagine it would be at least a week or two.”

Carlos hummed sympathetically, “Well, if there was one good thing to come out of today it’s that I’ll at least have plenty of time to spend with you while they clear this whole suspension mess up.”

Now TK was looking at him sharply, “Suspension? What do you mean? Carlos, did you get suspended?” 

At his nod, TK’s eyes widened, “How? What happened?”  

“It wasn’t a big deal. Well, it isn’t anymore, I guess. Turns out those two guys that kidnapped you also kidnapped a man this morning and forced him to rob a bank with a bomb strapped to his neck for encouragement. And I let him go because he said they would kill him and I believed him.” 

“And you got suspended for that?” 

“Well I did let a man who had just robbed several thousand dollars from a bank go, TK.” 

“Still,” TK said petulantly and Carlos grinned at his unwavering defense of him.

“It’s okay,” he told him, “I think it’s going to be fine. It turns out I was right and your dad and I did help to find the bank robbers so my dad thinks…” 

“Wait, your dad was there?” 

“The bank robberies were his case. He was the one sent to investigate me too.” 

“Carlos, baby. That’s...so much,” TK gave him a sympathetic look and shifted their hands so he was squeezing Carlos’s. “Are you okay?” 

“I am,” he told him with more certainty than he had felt about anything all day, “because you’re safe and that is all I need. Everything else is just extra.” 

TK smiled at him but didn’t look convinced, “Are you sure?” 

“It was an awful day even before I knew you were missing,” he admitted. “Earlier today I thought I had ruined everything. But almost losing the person I love most put some things in perspective, I think. We’re together and as long as that’s true, I have faith that everything will work out one way or the other.” 

TK smiled at him and they lapsed into comfortable silence before Carlos realized he still had one more bit of news to share. 

“There’s something else we’re going to have to do too, when you’re feeling up to it,” Carlos told him.

“Are you going to be mysterious and make me guess with a severe concussion or…?” TK asked pointedly after a pause, and Carlos chuckled. 

“We’re going to have to find some time to go to my parents’ house for dinner,” he informed TK. “They want to meet you properly.” 

“Your parents,” TK began, eyes wide, “did you tell your dad about us?” 

“Actually, I didn’t have to. Apparently they have known about us since they ran into us at the market. But,” he admitted, “if they didn’t  know before they would have after tonight. I couldn’t take my eyes off you the whole time, even when talking to my dad. Guess I’m not exactly subtle when it comes to you. That and,” he paused, fishing around in his pocket before offering up TK’s one year chip, “I asked him if we could keep this out of evidence, as a favor for me.” 

TK took the chip reverently, turning it over slowly in his hands, “I can’t believe you actually found it,” he admitted, “I was hoping you would and I left it on the off chance, but I never actually thought…” he trailed off, raising his eyes to meet Carlos’s gaze, “you’re amazing, you know that?” 

“Not nearly as amazing as you,” he countered. “Have I told you yet today how proud I am of you?” 

TK smiled but any response was cut off by a yawn. “You need sleep,” Carlos reminded him, “we can talk about everything later.” 

He went to slide off the bed, but a hand on his wrist stopped him. He looked over at TK to see him looking at him incredulously, “Where you think you’re going, Carlos Reyes?” 

“Off your bed,” he replied, “so you can sleep?” 

“Not likely,” TK countered, “I have been kidnapped, held at gunpoint and pistol whipped today. I deserve to share a bed with my boyfriend at the very least.” 

“But,” Carlos spluttered, “you’re hurt, and the bed’s not really big and…” 

“All I’m hearing are excuses Carlos and excuses will not be tolerated. Get in here.” 

Carlos sighed but obeyed, kicking off his shoes and he carefully slid into the space TK had left open for him, “The nurses are going to be in to check on you throughout the night,” he reminded him, “we’re going to get in trouble.” 

“No we won’t,” TK assured him, “we’re too adorable.” 

“You are such a brat,” Carlos noted with a chuckle, placing a kiss on the top of his head as he got settled beside him. 

“And you love it.” 

“I do,” Carlos assured him softly, “and I will always come for you.” 

“I know you will,” TK responded even as his breathing evened and his eyes started to close, “and I never doubted it for a second.”

[don-blogco]

Don Broco MBTI analysis

From an MBTI enthusiast who also happens to be a Don Broco fan

Scroll to the end for a tl;dr

MBTI (Myers-Briggs Type Indicator) is a personality test that combines ‘functions’ into 16 personality types. I personally find it much better than other personality tests since it doesn’t try to separate people into vastly different categories that leave lots of room for debate or outliers. Instead it uses traits that everyone has at least a little bit of (eg. introvert and extravert, thinking and feeling) and the types are simply different combinations of those traits. 

I don’t claim that any of these are 100% accurate, they’re just my guesses. I also don’t claim that MBTI can substitute as an actual psychology analysis, so don’t even try that shit on me- 

Anyway, onto the types

Matt - ISFP 

I saw someone else type Matt as ISFP, and I didn’t agree at first but the more I think about it, the more it makes sense.

The ISFP, a.k.a the adventurer type, is known to be outgoing, artistic, and adaptable, all of which I see in Matt. He seems like he’s very much a ‘I’m happy if you’re happy’ kind of person, and if you watch him in interviews he always seems to be quietly observing the conversation and he finds the right time to make a relevant comment.

ISFPs are also most engaged by adventures and activities, they keep their options open, and are very aware of not upsetting the balance of people around them. The first thing that comes to my mind for Matt is in studio update 13 when he’s going between Rob and the studio and gathering all the options and opinions on what to record next. He’s so occupied and interested in making sure everyone is happy with the solution–which I find very cute. I feel like Matt would be the perfect little messenger in the studio.

He also seems a bit of a perfectionist, and pays attention to the details of things, like when he’s scoring Si’s meal in Come Dine With Broco ep.2 and talks about the little ways to improve. I think his Introverted Feeling is showing there too.

Being an introvert doesn’t mean he isn’t social–he seems to bond with people very well actually, and ISFPs tend to be good at befriending most types of people. I honestly can’t picture Matt arguing with anyone- but anyway, as an introvert, he probably looks to himself for his decisions and reactions to things. The ISFP’s dominant cognitive function is Introverted Feeling, a trait which we probably wouldn’t see often since it’s directed inwards. This means that he’s probably rather emotional, and his feelings tend to be prominent but private–which is probably why he seems so carefree at a first glance.

Rob - ESFP

Rob was more difficult to place, I was assuming he would be an extravert but was open to the alternative. When I assigned him as ESFP though, it started to come together, though I’m still not sure, since introverted cognitive functions can be difficult to figure out for people I’ve never even met. 

One of the main traits of an ESFP is being spontaneous, and we’ve seen in Come Dine With Broco how Rob can completely go off the plan (“a dollop of vegan mayo”, anyone?) and just wing it. I noticed when I was watching studio update 13 for Matt’s analysis that Rob wasn’t so much sticking to the plan of doing vocals that night, but was still going for a logical solution (bro, your Extraverted Thinking is showing) to avoid interrupting what he was doing then (this seems a little far-fetched, but asking someone for a plan or opinion is one of the best ways to see how they organise their thoughts, or for MBTI at least). 

Another thing that makes me think he’s an ESFP is the things he tends to write lyrics about. He really connects emotionally with other people’s stories, and on several occasions he’s written songs about the experiences of someone else (eg. Whole Truth, Tightrope) rather than himself, and yet he doesn’t seem to have a problem in creating the emotional effect as if it were his own story. 

Similar to Matt, he seems pretty bad at decision making, lmao. I know I keep referring back to studio update 13, but it’s a really good example of a dynamic between two types who are prone to compromise rather than immediate decisions. When you watch them talk with Si on other occasions, he seems to be the one who makes quick decisions, which can be pretty amusing when everyone else in the room is dawdling around a decision, except maybe Tom, but I’ll get into that later.

Si - ESTP 

I knew pretty early on that I was probably going to be choosing a type like this one for Si, I just wasn’t sure on the exact details; I’m not very knowledgeable on the sentinel and explorer MBTI categories. I guess I had this impression from the fact that I saw someone had voted INFP for Si and I couldn’t resist a giggle, but maybe that’s just because I’m an INFP and I think I’m pretty different from Si. 

ESTPs are bold, practical and realistic, which made sense for Si, but the thing that made this particular type click for me was the tendency to be highly observant and dramatic–which perfectly fits Si’s quick and practical sense of humour. 

ESTPs tend to be logical, and would rather deal with the truth than a softened version of it, as the latter can seem almost deceptive to them. This trait in particular was very obvious to me when I was watching studio updates, because as I mentioned earlier, while Matt and Rob can sometimes dance around a difficult decision or critique, Si will just say it–which is probably very useful when you really just need an honest and objective opinion. 

Being logical doesn’t make someone boring–which I thought was obvious, but MBTI is often misunderstood this way–since ESTPs are active and spontaneous. Si usually does seem full of energy, especially in a social setting.

Tom - INTJ

I knew from the beginning that I was probably going to type Tom as an Ni type (Introverted Intuition), just because he seems so interesting and thoughtful, but also very private–which is probably why it was so difficult for me to guess the rest of his type. Someone typed him as an ENTP and I laughed out loud, which I started to regret as I got further into this and realised I had no idea what I was doing. Nevertheless, I finally came to a conclusion. 

INTJs are thoughtful and analytical, which we honestly don’t see that often from Tom, but I think that’s just because he’s particularly quiet. Also, don’t forget he’s surrounded by Se types, which probably brings out his own Extroverted Sensing trait. But anyway, if you pay attention in studio updates, almost every time Tom speaks, it’s to contribute something clever, and even if it’s not serious, his comments are witty–though I do think his humour can go straight over some people’s heads. 

Tom seems very self-reliant, which is also a trait of INTJs. They often think they’re more efficient than most others, which is a pretty accurate assumption to make. I can imagine Tom does a lot of the planning, and we know that he’s efficient in working in the background, as the band are comfortable leaving him to his own devices. Just like most of the rest of the band, he can be a perfectionist–which I probably could have guessed by how good their music always turns out. 

Of course, just because INTJs are private and logical, doesn’t mean they can’t be emotional. However, Introverted Feeling is their tertiary function, not to mention the fact it’s an introverted trait that probably wouldn’t appear to an average viewer, so that explains why Tom seems so chilled out. INTJs have very active imaginations and are also good listeners, so even though most people probably won’t know much about Tom’s emotions, those close to him would have an insight into his inner world.

TL;DR

Matt - ISFP 

Rob - ESFP 

Si - ESTP 

Tom - INTJ 

All of the members are perfectionists of sorts. Matt and Rob are more adaptable and emotional, while Si and Tom are more decisive and witty. 

[iliumheightnights]

Remembrance | Robb Stark x Male Reader

Fandom: Game of Thrones

Pairing: Robb Stark x Male Reader

Summary: (M/N) finds Robb alive after thinking he was dead. 

A.K.A, an alternate universe where Robb survives the red wedding somehow.

…

“King Robb and Lady Catelyn are dead! Killed by the Frey’s at the twins!”

(M/N) stopped as he heard those words. Not just two days had passed since he had left his love to deal with Theon. He had been worried about leaving Robb, but the man assured him he would be okay. He should have trusted his instinct. Now Robb was dead and he wasn’t there to protect him...at the least to die with him.

When they arrived at Winterfell they found that the ironborn had all been killed or captured and the Boltons now held it as their keep. (M/N) couldn’t believe it, there was practically nothing left for the Starks. He knew that if he tried to retake Winterfell he and his forces would die. He ordered his forces to fall back and then disbanded the war party. “Return to your keeps, swear loyalty to the Boltons,when I find Bran,Rickon, Arya or Sansa...be prepared to retake Winterfell.”

…

It had been months since the events of the red wedding happened. (M/N) was haunted by the visions of Robb. He couldn’t remember if he told him that he loved him before he had left. That was the part that (M/N) worried about the most. He didn’t want the last thing he said to Robb to be awful or an argument.

It was a common occurrence for him to see Robb in his dreams whenever he went to sleep. Robb would be standing there like any other day and smile at him with that stupid grin. (M/N) would try to get to him but before he could reach him Robb would look like he had just been stabbed and would fall just out of (M/N)’s reach. And those were the good nights.

Sometimes when he would be travelling he would believe that he had seen his lover standing in the treeline, or sometimes he would think he was among the crowd of people. It was never true. He couldn’t seem to get it through his head that Robb was gone, the king of the north was dead. He thought about what Robb would say if he could see him now. He’d laugh at him for being so weak, for not being able to move on. 

No. Robb wouldn’t think that at all. Robb would apologize for worrying him, apologize for leaving so soon. He would tell him how much he loved him and how they’d meet again. (M/N) knew that's what Robb would really say. He saw how broken his love was after his father was killed in kings landing, he’d never judge (M/N) for grieving.

Sometimes (M/N) hated the fact that he was alive. Why was he still breathing when Robb and most of the Starks were dead or missing? Missing. He had to find the Stark kids, that’s the least he could do for Robb, Ned and Catelyn. So that became his next mission, he knew that Sansa was being held by the lannisters. Bran had been at Winterfell with Rickon if anything Osha and Hodor would protect them both. Arya was what concerned (M/N), the lannisters said they had her...but he knew they were lying. Arya couldn’t be captured by anyone.

So that’s what (M/N) had been doing now. Searching for the lost Stark Girl. He had looked everywhere, From king's landing to even casterly rock. Everywhere he looked he didn’t find her. His search finally brought him to one place he was hoping to avoid. The Twins. Of course, he couldn’t just go around asking for a missing Stark. They’d have his head before he even thought of escape. His best chance of finding out if she was here would be to sneak into the dungeons.

Sneaking into the dungeons was no easy feat, for some people. For (M/N) all he had to do was kill a guard and take their uniform. Maybe it wouldn’t work for say the Lannisters, but for the Frey’s they were too stuck up to truly notice that he didn’t belong. He approached the dungeon and spoke to the guard. “You lucky Bastard. Lord Frey says you get to go have fun with the others, I get stuck guarding the pigs tonight.” The guard laughed and handed him the keys before he started walking away. “Sucks for you! Imma go find a nice woman to bed.” (M/N) rolled his eyes and waited for the guard’s footsteps to quiet. Once the coast was clear, he turned and entered the dungeon.

The cells were mostly empty, probably because Walder Frey liked to execute his prisoners rather than waste food on them. The few cages that did have prisoners looked like they had been there for a while, but no sign of Arya so far. Then (M/N) caught his breath as he took in the sight of someone he didn’t think he’d see ever again. “No...it can’t be. Robb?” He stepped closer to the cell and the man inside looked up. The man’s eyes widened and quickly stood up rushing to him. “(M/N)! By the gods what are you doing here?” (M/N) felt Robb’s hands grab his own on the bars. He actually felt him. He was real, he was alive. He looked exactly like he had, but with more messy hair and beard. “How are you...nevermind. Let’s get you out of here.” (M/N) quickly unlocked the cell and was engulfed in a hug by Robb. “Oh gods...It’s so good to see you. I thought I’d never see you again.” (M/N) hugged him back but quickly let go. “I thought the same, we’ll talk later but now we have to go. Here.” He handed Robb a cloak from the wall. Must have been left by another guard. The man quickly put it on. “So what’s the plan?” Robb asked. “You follow my lead.” He gripped Robb’s shoulder and began walking out of the keep. (M/N) quickly checked the hallway and was glad to see it still empty. “We’ll go through the secret entrance. That’s how I got in here.” Getting out of the Twins was surprisingly just as easy as getting in. They never expected someone to come and steal the king in the north.

(M/N) and Robb made it back to where (M/N) had left his horse. “Okay you’re up first, we need to go.” (M/N) quickly undressed from the Frey uniform and got back into his regular outfit. He grinned as he caught Robb watching him. He helped Robb onto the horse and followed soon after. “Okay let’s get out of here before they realize you’re missing.” (M/N) wrapped his arms around Robb’s body and grabbed the reins. The two booked it as far from the Twins and the Freys as they could.

As they rode it seemed to be too quiet. “What happened to you? I thought you were dead?” Robb stiffed a bit. “I thought I was. I had been shot multiple times and stabbed, but somehow...not enough to kill me. Walder Frey wanted to use me as a hostage in case the North retaliated...but I can see that isn’t going to happen anytime soon.” (M/N) let out a huffed, forced laugh. “North’s in a large civil war right now. No one’s saving anyone anytime soon dear...I heard they sewed Grey wind’s head onto your body. I’m guessing it was some other poor sap?” Robb nodded. It got quiet again. “I’m sorry about your mom Robb. She was a strong woman and I’m sure she’s watching over you with your father right now.” Robb didn’t say anything but leaned back into (M/N). They were quiet the rest of the ride.

They rode on for another day and only stopped to rest when they were sure they were far enough not to be followed. They arrived at an old hut, it seemed to be worn down by the weather. “Here, this looks abandoned. We can rest in here for the night.” (M/N) jumped off the horse and helped Robb down. “I’m fine, I’m fine. You don’t need to coddle me.” (M/N) tied up the horse. “Oh I think I do. I thought you were dead for months. I don’t want you out of my sight again.”

The inside of the hut was at least still stable. The roof didn’t look like it was about to collapse so that was the most important thing. (M/N) started a small fire in the fireplace and pulled out his pack. He took out a knife and threw it towards Robb. “Here. Get yourself cleaned up. Looking more like a wildling now.” Robb laughed and took the knife. “You wish.” Robb was going to start but stopped as he had an idea. “Why don’t you help me?” He wiggled his eyebrows at his love.

(M/N) sighed but grabbed the knife and began shaving him. He kept his hands steady as he worked his magic. “I’ve missed this...well not shaving you but just getting to feel you. I never thought I’d get to do this again. Glad I was wrong.” Robb smiled and rubbed (M/N)’s arm. “I’m glad you were wrong too.” (M//N) finished shaving Robb and cut his hair down back to the length it was at before the red wedding. The two looked into each other's eyes and leaned in. (M/N) felt Robb’s lips on his and pressed deeper. It had been so long and he almost forgot what his love felt like. 

The two broke apart and cuddled together in front of the fireplace. “So what happens now? I can unite the houses and rally them against the Boltons and Freys.” Robb said but (M/N) only shook his head. “I can’t see that going well. The red wedding killed many of your loyal men and the survivors won’t easily come back just yet. Perhaps you and I should figure out how to save Sansa or to find Arya or Bran and Rickon.” Robb frowned. “We’ll find them, I want them to be safe. Protected. But I also want my family home back. Those Boltons-” (M/N) interrupted him. “Will pay for what they’ve done. But there’s nothing we can do right now. For now just try and relax and we’ll come up with a plan tomorrow. For now…” He let his fingers move across Robb’s chest. 

��Let’s make up for lost time.”

[annepikachu]

MORSE CODE AND CHICKEN DRUMSTICKS (EXO Xiumin × Reader)

(FANFIC)

- Anne (Pikachu)

Note: Reader= Yn (Your name) (female)

13 chapters. Fluff. Lots of beautiful smiles.

(Also, there’s a small reference to Taylor Swift's lyrics because I love her.)

Happy reading!

^_^ ^_^ ^_^

I

Yn sighed and plopped down on the seat in her favorite corner of the library. She has a painful assignment to complete. Yes painful because she has been procrastinating until the day before she has to hand over the assignment.

“Humm, lately this library has been bustling with so many visitors”, she observed. “What’s up? Are they giving out chicken drumsticks for free?” Her eyes wandered around trying to figure out the reason. “Aah, that must be it" as her gaze stopped and hovered over the librarian’s desk. There’s this unrealistically cute guy who joined the post of the librarian a few days back. His predecessor had retired. And since then the library is mostly housefull. “Okay Yn stop staring at him as if you’re looking at a pizza. You look like a creep right now. Do your homework”, she mentally slapped herself and put on her headphones, opened her favorite Playlist and focused on her assignment.

Kim Minseok was surprised at the drastic change in the number of visitors in the library since the third day of his joining. He had heard from his predecessor about the library being usually empty. He was actually relieved by this fact. He was happy to see that a puppy eyed guy and a Yoda eared guy who seem to be a couple, a guy who always wears a bear hoodie and sometimes accompanied by two toddlers, a pair of cute granny and grandpa, and a clumsy handsome young lady are the only daily visitors. But it seems that his relief was short-lived.

The library has turned into Dalian Beach these days. The girls come with the pretext of reading books here but end up gushing about how handsome he is. One of them didn’t even realize that she was ‘reading’ her book upside down and yet another straightaway came up and put a can of coke on his desk. But these don’t bother him much because he is used to the flood of compliments coming from people irrespective of gender and age. Thankfully the library gets quite empty an hour before closing.

“Oh that handsome girl is still writing. She must have a huge assignment. She usually reads some interesting books at this time of day”, he kept looking at her. “Later on I should suggest her some of my favorites as well". He resumed his work but was soon distracted by the sound of a continuous tapping. His eyes narrowed.

Yn was frustrated by the last portion of her assignment and soon found herself tapping her fingers to the beat of the music playing in her headphones. “Screw it, I give up.” She paused. “Oh well I’ll just do the rest after having my supper. Don’t wanna upset Professor Junmyeon.” She slammed shut her notebook and was startled to find the cute librarian standing right in front of her.

^_^ ^_^ ^_^

II

“Umm sorry for startling you, but I wanted to ask you something.”

“Yes?” Yn was confused. What could this cute guy possibly want to know?

“Did you miss your lunch? Or are you craving for chicken drumsticks just for the sake of chicken drumsticks?”

“Huh?”

“I mean I heard you saying ‘chicken drumsticks’ over and over just now, tapping, to be precise”

“I did not. Well I had thought about it a few hours ago but not now. What makes you think so?”

“Those tapping sounds you made just now. They kinda translated into ‘chicken drumsticks’ though.”

“Really? Are you talking about Morse code?” Yn replayed that portion of the song and tapped consciously, noting down the codes while Minseok looked at her with amusement. “Holy Guacamole!” She sprang up. “You are right. Wow this is amazing!”

“So you were just tapping to the beat that turned out to be saying chicken drumsticks?”

The next moment they collapsed on the floor laughing at this curious conversation.

^_^ ^_^ ^_^

III

Yn couldn’t spare time to go to the library for a week but finally she was back on her usual routine. She waved back at Minseok and broke into a giggle as she remembered the conversation about ‘chicken drumsticks’. After sometime she got up to search for another book and almost bumped into Minseok, shrieked and fell on her butt. She got back on her feet, “Whoa, you really do have a knack for scaring off people”.

“My bad. It was you who bolted in here though.” His pout made Yn's heart go UwU. “Anyway which book are you searching for?...This? Okay. Here you go"

Just as she turned and started walking back to her desk, Minseok suddenly asked “By the way Yn, you didn’t ask me my name yet".

“Oh right.” She proceeded towards him. “What is your name Mr Minseok Kim a.k.a Xiumin?”

“H-How did you know my name? Even Xiumin?” He stuttered.

“Doesn’t everyone in the college? You’re probably the only librarian who has a fan-page dedicated to him.” She chuckled in amusement.

“Wow, I had no idea", he whispered.

“They post your pictures from shooting range so I guess those are already pretty much on public domain. But you can check if they have posted any private picture of yours and maybe hit report", she suggested. “Anyway I’ll borrow this book for a week.”

“Huh? Oh right. I’ll issue it right away.” He was dazed from the information overload.

^_^ ^_^ ^_^

IV

“Earth to Minseok. What are you thinking about? And what’s with the occasional smile too? Did you inhale Nitrous Oxide?” Sehun asked puckering his brows.

“Uh just two weird conversations I had with a girl. By the way, do you know I apparently have a fan-page dedicated to me?”

“Really?” It was evident that Sehun was feeling nervous for some reason.

“It seems you know something about this. C’mon spill.” Minseok insisted.

“Err well it was I who created the fan-page. Because you’re undeniably the coolest one here in the range. I even added the tagline ‘that’s right, my type’!"

“You little rascal!” He flicked Sehun's forehead. “I had the shock of my life when I came to know about this!”

“But Xiu, who’s the girl you were talking about?” Sehun had a mischievous glint in his eye. “Is that why you were smiling just now? Tell me more about it!”

“Dude it’s not what you think! She is a regular visitor in the library and we had just two conversations. I was surprised that she knew my arcade name Xiumin. And it was she who told me about the fan-page.”

“You have a crush oh her, don’t you? How is she like? Did you ask her out?”

“Relax Hun. We just talked about Morse code.”

“Ugh that’s such a turn off.”

“But she’s quite interesting. She’s handsome yes. And cute too.”

“I knew it! You’re whipped for her! Ask her out.”

“Calm down Hun. I’m not sure about how I feel and I don’t even know if she has a lover. Or if she is at all interested in me.”

“Don’t you underestimate your charm Xiu. And she isn’t interested in you? You get so many love letters, did you forget that? She might be charmed by your smile but probably doesn’t show it. She has a set boundary maybe?”

“I don’t want to draw inferences” Minseok sighed. “But yes I’d love to keep talking to her.”

“Use Morse code.” Sehun chuckled.

^_^ ^_^ ^_^

V

Finally it’s FriYay night and Yn couldn’t be happier staying in her pajamas and being lazy for the next two days. But what the hell! She can’t find her headphones anywhere. And she doesn’t remember where she had last placed them. They were a gift from her cousin. Chanyeol would be upset. She will ask his boyfriend Baekhyun to calm him down and herself buy a new one in the meantime.

Her thoughts were interrupted by her phone ringing.

“Hey Yn, Minseok here. I got your number from the library register. Sorry to call your number without your permission but I just found your headphones in the library and thought I should inform you right then.” He sounded sheepish.

“Phew, I’m so relieved! I was searching for them everywhere and almost decided to buy a new one. Thank you Minseok! I’m glad that you found them.”

“Uh it’s okay. I’m relieved too. So do you need these urgently? Then I can wait in front of the library and hand them over to-"

“No no, I don’t need them right at this moment, but… Umm can you please keep them with you until Monday? I visit the library everyday anyway. I’m too lazy to step out now.”

“Hahaha, okay okay. Don’t worry about that. See you on Monday”

Yn rolled back on her bed smiling. “I’ll have to treat him to chicken drumsticks for real.”

^_^ ^_^ ^_^

VI

“Thanks a lot Minseok." Yn took back her headphones and smiled with her heart eyes now making Minseok's heart go UwU. “Even if it’s not a big deal for you, I am really grateful to you and so I got something for you as a token.” She then started tapping on the desk. Minseok looked at her inquiringly but soon started interpreting the codes as she tapped away. “Got a box of chicken drumsticks for you. Hope you like them.”

He looked at her in surprise. “Who does not like drumsticks? You did not really have to do this though. Thank you for this.”

“Bon Appétit”, she said as she gave him the box. “Well, I need to hurry now. See you later.”

“Why is she so adorable?” He wondered while staring at the box in his hands.

^_^ ^_^ ^_^

VII

Yn was having several bad days at a stretch now. She spent weeks without sleeping at night and watched FIFA world cup instead. Her favorite team was eliminated in the semifinals. And now the lack of sleep was taking a toll on her. She barely managed to complete all her pending assignments on time. Professor Junmyeon was still upset with her because she omitted a portion of her assignment carelessly. Her neighborhood cat disappeared without a trace. She avoided a freak accident but witnessed several persons getting severely injured. She has grown tired of her menstrual cramps which were being very cruel to her this time. And the last nail in the coffin: she had a quarrel with her bestfriend Jongdae today. Physically and mentally exhausted she placed her hand on her stomach and sat on a bench behind the canteen of the college and started sobbing silently.

Minseok was leaving early today because the library was practically empty today. Even Yn didn’t come. He suddenly spotted someone sitting hunched on a bench at a distance. It seemed that the person was hurt in the stomach. He rushed over there.

“Yn? What happened to you? What’s wrong? Why are you crying? Are you hurt somewhere? Tell me what’s wrong.” Minseok sat beside her worriedly, held her shoulders and turned her towards him. She buried her face in his chest and burst into loud sobs. He instantly engulfed her in his hug and patted her head. “It’s okay Yn. Let it out.” Over the months he grew close to her. They both had a lot of friendly banters and of course some crazy conversations through Morse code. Seeing her cry now tugged at his heartstrings. “Breathe Yn. Take deep breaths. Yes. Do you want to talk about it?”

“I hate crying. I-I don’t want to be like this.” Yn said between her sobs. “I had way too many bad days to handle and-" she paused abruptly. The cramps were back again. She curled up in pain.

“And you are having cramps?” He finished her sentence. “You’ll be fine. Yn. Just endure a bit, okay?” Still holding her tight in his hug he reached out for his bag and took out a heating pad. “Here, Yn. Take this.” He kept on stroking her head and occasionally rubbing her back while she tended to her cramps.

_

“You okay now?”

Yn pulled back from the hug when the cramps subsided. “Thank you Minseok. Yes, I feel better now.”

“I’m glad.” He handed her some tissue paper. “Now wipe your tears and come with me” He led her to the canteen.

“Here, have a cup of hot chocolate. You’ll get relief… That’s right yes. Drink slowly.” He sat beside her and stroked her head. “Done?... Okay"

Yn started sniffling. “Yn, is everything okay?” Minseok panicked.

She nodded her head. “I’m just touched by your gesture. Thanks for making me feel better.”

Minseok smiled. “That’s what friends do. Well, it’s pretty late now. Let me drop you off at your house. Let’s go.”

_

“I have an extra helmet and I drive pretty well and my bike is well maintained.”

“I didn’t say anything.” Yn giggled.

“Well I just made a declaration so you don’t feel threatened. Just don’t fall asleep that’s all.” He was relieved to hear her laugh again.

“Aye aye Master Xiu.”

^_^ ^_^ ^_^

VIII

Yn saw that Jongdae wasn’t present in the classroom. She decided she’d visit his house later today and sort out the misunderstanding. She walked out of the classroom during recess hour. Suddenly someone hugged her tight. She smiled and hugged him back. She knew it was Jongdae. “I’m sorry Yn. There was a misunderstanding. I shouldn’t have reacted that way. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“It’s okay Dae, I realized that. And I would have anyway barged into your house had you not come to college.”

“So, are we good now?”

“Of course!”

“Okay then pretty please! Help me pick out a pendant for my girlfriend. I’ve selected some of them but couldn’t finally decide among them. Come with me to the shop later today.”

Yn scowled. “This is why you rushed to patch it up with me huh?”

“Gosh! No no no that’s not it! I’ll treat you to ice cream. Okay?”

“Okay. Deal"

Jongdae sighed. “The way you react to food, I’m pretty sure you’ll drop me in a heartbeat if someone offers you food.”

Suddenly Ji-eun appeared out of nowhere and fake punched Jongdae's face. “How dare you make my Yn baby upset? Yes Yn drop him right away. I’ll treat you to a truckload of ice cream.”

“Guys!!” Jongin appeared and walked towards them making the corridor his runway.

Yn couldn’t deny once she had a tiny crush on him.

“Guess what? Kyungsoo cooked Spaghetti for us!” Jongin screamed. And the four of them dashed to the canteen.

^_^ ^_^ ^_^

IX

Yixing was already there with Kyungsoo when they reached the canteen. “Dig in guys", Kyungsoo said as they huddled around the table.

“Okay guys! I’ve some tea to spill", Ji-eun announced while looking at Yn intently.

“Spill! Spill! Spill!” They chanted in unison.

“Apparently Yn has gotten herself a boyfriend and decided to conceal the fact".

Yn almost choked. “Wha- when? Even I don’t know I have a boyfriend?”

“Oh yeah? I saw that cute librarian dropping you off at your house yesterday night. You turned to hug him but you seemed shy.” Ji-eun added with a glee “And friends don’t feel shy Yn.”

Yn protested. “I had my reasons. He’s not what you guys think.” She remembered that she hugged Minseok out of gratitude towards him for taking care of her. She had hesitated initially thinking whether it would be appropriate. But she hugged him anyway.

Suddenly someone put their chin on Yn’s left shoulder and yet another put their chin on her right shoulder and both said in unison, “Well well Yn, you never told us anything about this!”

Yn almost fell from her seat. She turned around to see Chanyeol and Baekhyun smiling mischievously at her.

“So is he or is he not-” Chanyeol said while taking a seat. “Your crush?”, added Baekhyun.

Yn shrugged. “I am not sure. I’ve way too many crushes at this point and you guys know that.”

“The most recent crush is our senior Jessi, right", Yixing asked.

“Well yes but I can only admire her from afar”, Yn replied dreamily.

“Anyway get to the point guys.” Chanyeol took the reins. “So apparently it seems he has a soft corner for Yn. I’ve noticed that. And now we must root for Yn and make sure they end up together. So whats our plan?”

“How about kidnapping him and threatening him to date Yn"? Kyungsoo asked excitedly.

“No way!” Jongin protested.

“You’re going to get all of us in trouble, Soo", Baekhyun chuckled.

“Isn’t that the easiest way out?”, Kyungsoo pouted.

“That’s not how things work, Kyungsoo-ah", Jongin said while poking at Kyungsoo's cheek.

Yn could sense that everyone noticed something was brewing between Jongin and Kyungsoo but unsurprisingly they chose to focus on Yn today.

“Well even I agree that’s the easiest way out but we don’t want to get in trouble.” Jongdae said seriously, “so Yn you better speed up and ask him out. And don’t deny that you don’t feel anything for him.”

Yn was again reminded about how she felt fuzzy while being engulfed in Minseok’s hug. He’s definitely a good friend. But she didn’t want to rush things up.

“And Yn if you want to daydream instead of eating that last spoonful of Spaghetti”, Yixing got up and snatched her spoon and finished off the remaining Spaghetti. “Let me have it.”

“I swear to God Yixing!” Yn sprang up. “I’m gonna train Inzaghi to chase you!”

“Now who’s Inzaghi?” Jongin asked suspiciously.

“It’s the Vincenzo effect.” Baekhyun explained. “It’s a neighborhood pigeon and the naming courtesy goes to Yn", Ji-eun added.

“Don’t you guys dare to give out spoilers, some of us are lagging behind an episode or two”, the rest of them warned.

^_^ ^_^ ^_^

X

Minseok was standing in the balcony of the library replaying in his head the events of yesterday. He didn’t expect Yn to hug him again and make his heart beat erratically. Sehun was right. He is falling for Yn gradually.

“Hey Minseok are you alright?” Minseok heard Yn’s voice and realized he had zoned out thinking of her. “You seem to have caught a cold.” Yn was worried.

“Oh yes it was raining in my area yesterday and I got drenched".

“Uh oh I’m so sorry. You wouldn’t have gotten drenched had you not accompanied me to drop me off.”

“Well it was raining for quite a long time and I’d have anyway gotten drenched even if I had reached my place earlier. So blame the clouds Yn.” Minseok chuckled making Yn giggle at his explanation.

“But seriously though, you don’t look good. I think you have a fever too.” Yn put her palm on his forehead. Minseok was flustered looking down at her worried face. Yn didn’t realize she was standing at almost zero distance from him. Before he could utter anything Yn grabbed his wrist. “You need to visit the doctor right now", Yn said dragging him downstairs towards the doctor’s room.

_

“He’s running a high fever. I’m giving some medicine.” The doctor took out a file of capsules. “And I think it’s better if you lie down and take rest in the sick room until your fever goes down.”

“But the libr-" Minseok tried to protest but was cut off by Yn’s stern glare.

“Library can wait. Health first Minseok". Yn crossed her arms.

“Tell your assistant about your situation. He can handle the library for sometime.” The doctor suggested.

_

“You should head back to library Yn. You went there to read, right? I’ll stay here until my fever goes down. Don’t worry I won’t run away from here.”

“I can read later. Now you close your eyes and take rest.” Yn said sitting on the chair beside the bed while stroking Minseok’s head absent-mindedly.

^_^ ^_^ ^_^

XI

Yn could sense that Minseok was staring at her for a long time. The library was crowded as usual. She mouthed “what happened?” but he just smiled and shook his head and resumed his work. He seemed tensed for some reason.

She heard him tapping on his desk when the crowd thinned. Her eyes grew wide. He- did he tap “will you go on a date with me?” She saw him walk towards her.

Minseok spoke hesitantly, “I know I asked you all of a sudden, but I like you. I’ve been debating whether I should tell you this for weeks but I couldn’t hold back any further. You don’t need to tell me right now about how you feel. Take your time. And it’s absolutely fine if you don’t feel the same way. But can we maybe go on a friend date atleast?”

Yn thought for a while. “Sure. Let’s have a friend date.” She smiled. “Where are we going then?”

“I was thinking of taking you to my shooting range. We can play some rounds and have snacks later on there. How about this Sunday afternoon?”

“Sounds great!” Her eyes lit up. “But! On one condition.”

“And what’s that?” He asked cautiously.

“Bring me a bouquet of chicken drumsticks that day.” Yn replied with a wide grin.

“As you wish.” He smiled widely as he touched her nose-tip with his forefinger.

^_^ ^_^ ^_^

XII

“This is such a cool place!” Yn ran around inside the shooting range, looking at everything in awe. Minseok watched her with an amused smile. Yn picked up a gun and aimed at the target.

“Wait.” Minseok came up behind her and held her arms. She felt her back against his chest. Her heart started thumping. “Focus Yn. Keep your arm straight while holding the gun. You don’t wanna hurt yourself when the gun recoils.” He adjusted her arms. “Now fire.” She hit the target.

Yn was ecstatic. “Minseok let’s play a round then. I’ll go first.”

He kept on smiling and hyped her up every time she aimed with the gun. She was just unbelievably adorable. And a sharpshooter too. She missed the target only once. He fell for her deeper every time she flashed an adorable smile at him after hitting the target.

“It’s my turn now. And I’m going to beat you in this round.” He winked at her.

Yn gaped at him while he shot the targets one by one. He looked darn sexy in that pose. He got ready for the last target and was just about to press the trigger. “I like you too, Minseok!” She blurted out. Minseok was shocked and turned his face towards Yn. The trigger went off and he missed the target.

“It’s a draw! It’s a draw! You didn’t beat me!” Yn jumped and danced gleefully around him.

“So, you- you said that just to make me miss my target? And nothing more?” Minseok looked at her sadly and turned his back to her.

“No! Oh no no you got the wrong idea.” She tugged at his sleeve. “I really meant it when I said I like you.” Minseok turned towards Yn in surprise. She went on, “I have been thinking about it ever since you told me about your feelings. I had already decided I’d tell you about my feelings today. But I couldn’t just suppress the urge to fool around a bit when I got the opportunity to.”

“You’re such a cheeky girl!” Minseok exclaimed and chased her.

“You won’t catch me that easily! I run fast.” Yn shouted while running ahead of him.

“Well not faster than I!” Minseok wrapped his arms around her waist, lifted her off the ground and spun round, making her blush.

_

“It’s getting late, Yn, let’s go now.” Minseok said tugging at her.

“I’m not able to handle this gun properly.” Yn pouted.

“It’s okay, I’ll show you how to. But later, okay? It’s getting really late now.” Minseok couldn’t stop chuckling at her antics.

_

Minseok and Yn bumped into Sehun outside the shooting range. “Yn, this is Sehun, one of my teammates in the shooting range. And a TMI, he’s the one who created that fan-page.” Minseok gave Sehun a fake glare. “And Sehun, this is Yn, my date.”

“Nice to meet you, Yn.” Sehun gave her a warm handshake. “Do you like this place and my bro here?”

“I love it here! I’m gonna come here often now.” Yn replied. “And yes I like him too.” She said looking at Minseok shyly.

Minseok blushed. “I’m dropping her off at her house. I’ll see you tomorrow Hun.”

Sehun smirked and managed to whisper into Minseok’s ear, “you are lucky that she’s into Morse code. So did you confess to her using Morse code?”

“Don’t give me that look you cheesy little brat.” Minseok whisper-yelled at him.

_

Yn stopped by her gate. “I really had a great time with you. Thank you for today Minseok.”

“I’m also glad to spend some time with you. See you tomorrow.” Minseok stopped before turning back to his bike. “So are we dating officially now Yn?”

“Yes. A thousand times yes.” Yn smiled.

He walked closer to her, leaned close to her lips and locked his eyes with hers seeking permission. She nodded nervously while standing on her tiptoes and placed her hands on his shoulders. Wrapping his arms around her he pulled her in and she was a little more brave. It’s the first kiss, it’s flawless, really something. It’s fearless. Yn didn’t care now if Ji-eun was sitting by her window and keeping an eye on her. Yn would tell her group of friends everything tomorrow.

But the thing is, Ji-eun really saw Yn with Minseok. She had a triumphant smile on her lips.

^_^ ^_^ ^_^

XIII

Yn saw that everyone in her squad was giving her a cheeky smile while swarming towards her. “Guys, I can explain. I wanted to tell everything face to face. That’s why I didn’t text anyone.”

“And I saw them kissing too!” Ji-eun said excitedly and made a kissing gesture towards Yn.

Yn had a flashback of yesterday. He was very gentle with her. She absolutely melted in his kiss.

“I bet Yn is having flashbacks of that moment.” Jongdae smirked. “Look at her. Her face is a beetroot now.”

“You guys!” Yn stomped her feet.

“Okay, okay calm down Yn. Let’s have a lunch together today, shall we? Tell Minseok to join us.” Chanyeol spoke.

“Yes, yes, yes, yes, call him.” Everyone shouted in unison.

“Okay. Okay. Chill.” Yn giggled while dialing Minseok’s number.

_

Minseok blended well with Yn’s noisy and cheeky friends. Yn was glad how things turned out.

“So, Yn and Minseok. Tell us how did you two end up together. What was the catalyst? The squad wants to know.” Yixing said holding up a spoon as if it were a mic.

The couple turned to each other and smiled. They both knew what they were about to say. Minseok and Yn turned again towards the squad and said, “not just one. There were two catalysts. Morse code and Chicken drumsticks.”

-----(The end)-----

_____________________________________________________________

P.S. Those who are wondering how did Minseok know Yn’s name (in chapter III), I leave it to your imagination. ;-)

He might have seen the library register, or might have noticed the name on her notebook when she shut it, or maybe her headphones were customised to bear her name on them and he noticed that. The choice is yours. And why did Yn not get surprised? Well she’s quick-witted too.

I hope this wasn’t too boring. This is my first time writing a story. Thank you for reading :-)

If you wish you can take a look at my fanart account on Instagram. Here's the link.

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Thank you Ayushee for hyping me up. She has written a fanfic too. Check it out.

[fantasticstoryteller]

New Dynasty Chapter 31

“Seriously?” Wade asked looking at the wheelchair.

[Just where did a wheelchair come from?]

{Forget the wheelchair. I wanna know where the fake legs came from.}

Tony sighed and Arachne, in Peter’s arms, flinched. She’d been twitchy around Tony since Wade made that comment about how Tony got a little too enthusiastic in training. She also hadn’t spoken since, and it worried him because he’d gotten used to the sound of her voice.

[Is she just not going to talk in front of Tony, or is she avoiding us as well?]

{Black Widow looks pissed as hell.}

Deadpool turned to see the Black Widow, a.k.a. Natasha Romanov behind him. She did not look pleased—but then she never did. “This was not her fault,” Natasha said coldly. “She was emotionally blackmailed into it.” She grimaced. “I’m trying to get them to understand why that’s wrong.”

“Well,” said Peter as he rolled the wheelchair over to Wade, “I’m sure none of us thought raising children would be easy.” He helped the grumbling mercenary into the chair.

[No, but it is scary as Hell.]

{Is she sucking her thumb again? Should we tell her to stop?}

Deadpool reached up and gently pat the girl’s leg. She looked down with wide, frightened amber eyes, eerily reminiscent of the time they saved her from the lab. “It’s okay,” he said vaguely.

[How are we supposed to comfort a frightened child?]

{It’s easier when what’s left of our bottom half doesn’t look like mangled meat from a grinder.}

“Please don’t forget to explain why it’s wrong to explore past locked doors in this Tower,” Peter added. She grimaced.

“I’d like someone to explain the purpose of these,” Deadpool growled as he glared at the fake legs.

“We don’t want to give random passers by a heart attack Deadpool,” Tony said firmly.

“If they don’t have a heart attack from Deadpool dancing in the middle of the street,” Wade grumbled, “then they shouldn’t at this.”

Tony opened his mouth, but Pepper interrupted. “We dug these out for you to go home—and yes, we want you to rest a few days as well Peter.” Tony made a noise and Pepper glared at him before turning back to Peter. “In the meantime, we would appreciate it if you kept these things in good shape Deadpool; we borrowed the legs from a medic training facility and they would like them back in one piece.”

[What about the wheelchair? Can we blow up the wheelchair?]

{Probably not. There’s a sad lack of things going boom here.}

“All right,” said Peter. He propped the fake legs into the footrests of the chair, covered the lap with a blanket, and then put Arachne on top of the whole thing. She was still sucking her thumb, and she clutched Wade like a lifeline.

[That was low, Peter. Real low.]

{How are we supposed to kick these things off the wheelchair in the middle of the street if she’s on top of them like this?}

I think that’s the point. It bothered Wade a little that Peter was willing to play along, but he could also sense the other man’s nervous energy and eagerness to leave. “All right children,” called Deadpool. “Toodles!” Peter firmly wheeled him out of the building, across the street, and into their condo. When they were inside the door the girl didn’t move and still sat there holding him as she shook.

[She’s CRYING!]

{Why isn’t she making any noise? That’s disturbing.}

[Forget that, she’s CRYING! We need to make her feel better NOW!]

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Wade asked as he gently pushed her away from his chest so that he could see her face. Tears fell in silent streams down her cheeks and Peter was crouching there next to the chair.

“You’re hurt,” she said.

“Yeah,” admitted Wade, “but I’ll heal.”

“But it still hurts,” she said, still crying.

[How is she doing that?]

{This seems deeper than us just being hurt.}

“And it’s all my fault!” she wailed.

[Wait—what?]

{How is this her fault? She wasn’t even there!}

Peter reached over and gently wiped the tears away. “Arachne,” he said gently, “why do you think it’s your fault Wade got hurt?”

“Be—because it—it’s al—always my fault,” she sobbed. “It was my fault back at the Bad Place, and I tried—tried to be good, but they were going to fail 27-IM, and I had—to—to try to save him!” she began sobbing incoherently and Deadpool hugged as Peter rubbed her back. The two looked at each other as they realized what she was saying.

Every time those bastards at the lab had thought that Arachne was “misbehaving” they’d torture one of the other children. Wade wanted to hunt them all down and kill them. Hell, he wanted to bring that bitch he did kill back to life so he could take her apart piece by piece.

[Do you think she thinks we got hurt because she helped the others break out of the floor Pepper left them on?]

{Oh, we’ve got to fix this! We can’t have her blaming herself every time we get hurt!}

[It happens way too much.]

“Hey,” Peter said softly as he pet the girl’s hair. “Listen, it’s not your fault that Wade got hurt.”

“Probably mine,” Wade said thoughtfully. “I did tell Rusty Iron to pull that stick out of his ass.”

“And no one was expecting the suit to malfunction,” Peter continued. “It’s not your fault.” She looked up and at Peter and Wade felt his heart start to break at the sight of the child’s face.

“And hey,” said Wade, “you know what?” She turned to look at him. “You did save him. You saved all of them.”

She shook her head. “No I didn’t,” she said softly. “You did. All of you did.”

“But if you hadn’t been there, in that elevator,” Peter added, “we never would have known about the lab downstairs. It never would have occurred to us to even look. You saved them.”

The tears, thankfully, stopped. “I saved them,” she repeated.

Peter smiled. “Yes you did. And you know what?” he asked as he wiped more tears off her face. “It doesn’t matter that they don’t realize that. What’s important is that you saved them.”

“I saved them,” she said wonderingly. She looked down at her hands, still holding the ball of webbing she’d pulled out of the valve. “I did.” She tossed the ball towards the garbage can only to have it bounce off the wall behind it and off another few surfaces before it rolled to a stop in the floor. “I didn’t know they could do that!” she said.

Peter and Wade laughed.

Later that night Wade stared at the ceiling from his bed. Hey author.

Yes Wade?

What would have happened to her in the other story you stole her from?

She would have escaped that night you found her, gotten taken in by a group of homeless people who took care of her until she was caught as a truant child at sixteen, placed in a home, and then drafted into the army to fight against the others in the lab that didn’t escape and were being used as emotionless soldiers.

Wade’s breath hitched at the bleak description.

She would have ended up in battle where she recognized one of the others as a child that she’d lived with, been unable to kill him, and been killed as the emotionless doll that used to be a person stepped over her corpse without recognition to continue his mission.

That’s horrible!

Yeah, I didn’t like it either. This story is much better.

[dionysins]

♡ our muses almost kiss, but are interrupted. a.k.a. the story of how they met. ||  august x cleo @polarisdreams

( tw for mild violence. )

even in his twenties, august has never made a habit of going to clubs, especially not ones like this. lights are dim, red and pink neon lights adorn the back rooms where he’s led away by andrea the manager once he tells her he’s samael’s newest recruit.

“they’re all still getting ready,” she says, uninterested, as she raps on the black door twice before pushing it open.

“everyone, this is — ” a pause, as though she’s trying to remember his name, “ —august. he’s replacing arnold starting today. don’t scare this one off, alright?”

there are scattered murmurs and giggles, nonchalant hellos as he stands awkwardly in the powder room, unsure if he should try to introduce himself better. before he can decide, someone walks up to him, gently touches his arm, and offers him a small smile that doesn’t quite reach his eyes.

“you don’t look like you belong here,” he murmurs, taking the fabric of his jacket between two fingers. “i’m cleo.”

cleo is — beautiful, for a lack of more poetic words. he can practically feel brown eyes scanning him up and down, and it makes him swallow. eventually, long fingers hang as the younger man offers his hand, and august takes it lightly, giving it a weak shake. cleo lets out a small laugh and he isn’t quite sure how to take that.

“don’t be a stranger, august.” he hums as he walks out of the room.

-

he does see cleo more often than not, but they rarely have time to speak more than a quick hello, and leave my bag in the back room, if you could, darling. in all his honesty, he’s not sure he really wants to get involved with what goes on behind closed doors. it’s not his job to know, after all.

but one night, cleo comes back to the club with a black eye. it’s maddening, the way everyone else seems to ignore it or worse, pretend they haven’t seen it in the first place, while he can’t take his eyes off of cleo.

and cleo, ever so perceptive, pulls august into one of the private rooms, almost angry.

“do you want to tell me why you’ve been staring at me all night? have i got something on my face?”

august stares, again. he’s expected this much, of course. samael had been realistic with him when they’d told him about what this job would involve, the things he might end up seeing. they’d even offered him a sprinkle of advice — don’t let your emotions guide you here.

“someone hit you.” is what comes out instead, successfully ignoring samael’s advice.

“no shit.”

august stands up. it’s cleo turn to stare at him now, slightly confused as he heads straight to the mini-fridge and dumps all the ice left in there into a plastic bag. a look of realization flashes across cleo’s face, and with brows still knitted, he takes off his heels and sits at the edge of the bed as august ties the top of the bag, then wraps the bag in a small tea towel before bringing it back.

not much is said between them when august gently presses the makeshift ice pack against cleo’s left eye.

“are you always this gentle?”

the question catches him off guard, a little. he’s sure he stammers out something incomprehensible, though in the end, he settles on pretending to be annoyed and avoiding the question altogether.

“i’m -- hold still,” august returns, shifting the ice a bit as though it might make up for the sudden discomfort he feels.

“it’s fine, really. it’s not the first time it’s happened.”

and that makes him lift his head and meet cleo’s unbruised eye. he can tell cleo’s not one to want pity and in his defense, it’s not pity that he feels. he can’t seem to stay still around cleo much and once more, he finds himself looking now at cleo’s cell phone sitting on the bed beside him. without asking, he takes the phone and holds it up to cleo, who seems more amused than anything as he plugs the passcode in for him.

“next time, call me right away. do these things have speed dial anymore?” august asks as he plugs in his number and lets the phone ring. he’s met with a laugh — this time freer than before.

“i’m serious,” august pushes, petulant. “even if it’s late, i’ll be there.”

“i know,” cleo’s voice is quieter than usual when he responds, and he lifts a hand to place over the hand august is using to hold the ice against his eye. slowly, he pushes the hand down, lifts his chin slightly as if to show august that there’s nothing to worry about.

“it’s still --”

“nothing a little bit of concealer can’t fix, august.”

august seems visibly frustrated, and the edge of cleo’s lips twitch into a small smile. “look,” he says, and takes august’s hand again and guides it to his face. he runs his thumb over cleo’s cheekbone.

and maybe he leans in first. maybe cleo does. he holds his breath and eyes flutter to a near close, ears ringing like a warning that he should leave now, leave all of this behind, never come back. cleo’s only inches away from him and it feels a little too warm, maybe a little too dangerous.

lips are barely touching and all he can think about it how hot his face feels and  —

“cleo!”

( he should’ve known then that this would never end well for them. )

“cleo, there’s someone here for you. says he’s in a hurry,” andrea yells over the closed door, and august, having jumped back ten feet, straightens out his shirt. for a moment, their eyes meet again, and there’s a word on the tip of his tongue, but it’s a word he knows he doesn’t have the right to say. they’re almost-strangers like this, after all. 

“be right there, andrea.” cleo finally calls back out, and for a moment, august thinks he might look a little sad. sad, tired, lost. he knows because he sees the same things in the mirror every morning. cleo stands and tucks his phone away. august stands after him, and quietly follows him out of the room.

[coronashmorona]

COVID-19 Isolation:

Day 0

For a day & a half, my husband (hereinafter “Hubs”) & I pondered (read: lowkey argued about) the boundaries & limitations we should be imposing on our selves & our kids given the increased prevalence of coronavirus in our area. Was avoiding everyone all weekend really necessary? Can we eat takeout food? Should our kids go to school on Monday? What about after-school activities? What about the fantasy baseball draft we were supposed to host next weekend? Or the slew of small children’s birthday parties scheduled for the coming weeks?

Hubs was already planning on working from home, which he does often the last few years after his firm moved to a “hoteling” style office. My work is very flexible part-time & gets done whenever I can fit it in around everyone else’s schedules, i.e. can also take place from home if needed. 

Then, today, we got word that all local schools will be closed for 2 weeks. So at least that’s settled. 

Now, we’re confronting the challenge of how to go about our daily lives under these strange new circumstances. Namely:

The need for some kind of scheduled routine. We have a first-grader & a preschooler. They are absolutely wonderful, but go entirely bonkers if we’re home without any structure. They’re also in completely different places as far as personality, temperament, & educational needs. 

First-grader (hereinafter “6yo”) is kind of a high-strung, type-A, preintellectual. She needs a full briefing about what’s happening every hour of every day. If plans change, she has a million questions about what the alteration entails. (If she’s conscious, she has a million questions, period.) She enjoys so many great activities - artistic pursuits, imaginative play, dancing, & really anything else that involves running around like a banshee - but constantly asks for TV time and/or a snack anyway. Historically, it’s been nearly impossible to set her up with an activity & walk away for more than 10 minutes; she’s just the sort of kid who needs/expects an adult caregiver to provide companionship, guidance, & answers at all times. I’m hoping that having an agenda mapped out for each day will remind her of school & she’ll be more amenable to doing things independently for a relatively short, set amount of time. I can also meet her halfway & do my work at the dining room table while she embarks on a quiet activity. Finally, it sounds like the school district is hatching a contingency plan for remote student learning, complete with daily homework posted online, which is comforting to say the least. 

Preschooler (”4yo”) is a rambunctious ball of energy, but tends to be pretty easygoing overall. If left to his own devices, he’ll wander over to his trains or his blocks or even a book & play on his own. The problem, of course, is that when left to his own devices for too long, he’s probably up to no good. His favorite pastime of late has been playing in Hubs’s office, using some old printers & other computer accessories to “build Robot Marty” (a.k.a. the robot that roams the aisles at Stop & Shop). This activity will be mostly off-limits while Hubs works from home - a deprivation that I’m sure will be ill-received & spawn all sorts of disruptive discovery missions, i.e. let’s see what happens when we stick the end of Mama’s headphones into the electrical outlet. Oyyy. My hope is that if I break out some toys he hasn’t used in a while, & a few shiny new (read: held in abeyance since his birthday) ones, he’ll amuse him accordingly while 6yo & I do our thing. 

Getting fed. I am really, really nervous about consuming commercially prepared food right now. The chances of contracting COVID-19 from it are small, but it doesn’t seem worth the risk. As it is, I’m a bit of a DIY food purist, frequently eschewing restaurant food for my own creations. I have a whole separate blog detailing my experiences with Whole30, in which I take my appreciation for clean-eating to the max in order to improve my health. Tl;dr I cook a lot of fresh veggies & lean meats & try to minimize the amount of processed foods in my diet. Doing this is hard enough under ~ordinary stressful circumstances, let alone a global pandemic. I’ve already slid into some unhealthy reflexive stress-eating that needs to be curtailed ASAP. 

The biggest point with this, I feel, is establishing a meal+snack schedule. Else, the kids will constantly be asking for things to eat, interrupting any hope of sticking to a playtime/learning/physical activity schedule. On certain days spent mostly at home, I feel like all I do is stand in the kitchen cutting fruit, & we will not survive the next few weeks if that’s how it’s gonna be. Granted, this is sometimes exacerbated by my own penchant to use a free minute here or there to chop & roast some Brussels sprouts or eggplant. But there has to be a point at which “oh look, Mom’s in the kitchen” doesn’t automatically translate to “let’s give her something else to do”.

A possible strategy to alleviate this involves cutting a bunch of fruit in advance, portioning it out, & storing it on a fridge shelf the kids can reach, so they can get it themselves. I don’t want to deprive them of food; we just feel that they shouldn’t be eating a constant stream of processed garbage. This is a particular risk for 6yo, who has the metabolism & appetite of a hummingbird & openly fixates on the constant quest for treats.

Dealing with life’s other extenuating circumstances. As others with young children can likely attest, our life is constantly in several different states of flux, limbo, and/or disarray. Some other things we’ve been dealing with lately and/or will be dealing with shortly:

Hubs’s dad is having a hip replacement tomorrow. Several people tried to talk him out of it, but he’s been having terrible sciatic pain for a long time & as long as the surgeon/hospital will have him he feels he needs to go ahead with it. Who will take care of him afterward, & whether/when we can visit, remain uncertain. LATE-BREAKING UPDATE: surgery cancelled. A relief insofar as one variable eliminated.

Last week I definitely herniated/tore something in my abdominal area while pulling the kids in a wagon, & need to see a doctor for that. I’m not thrilled with the idea of being in a highly-trafficked public place, but I also don’t want to put off getting myself looked at & aggravate the injury in the meantime. As it is, I’m trying not to lift heavy things (e.g., our 4-year-old) or spend too much time on my feet, but that in itself is a struggle. Right now my appointment is scheduled for a time at which Hubs has a very important (virtual) work meeting, so I need to reschedule it and/or find someone else who can watch the kids. I’m praying for the former outcome because it begs the question “Who should we be letting in the house?!”

We’re in the early stages of renovating our kitchen. This means that we’ve met with a few designers/contractors about possible layouts & options, inching towards finalizing a plan & selecting one of them to carry it out. It sounds like Hubs wants to move ahead with this process as before, but suffice to say my mental bandwidth is now sufficiently occupied with other shit. 

I’m always in the middle of 187 different things, & it feels like they’re all now on hold: purging the house of outgrown clothes & toys, organizing the basement, learning German, catching up on continuing legal education credits,

Processing the fear + existential woe. None of us have ever lived through anything like this. It is fucked up. I try to take comfort in the fact that the isolation protocols are empowering: by staying away from others who might be carrying the disease, we’re taking control of an uncertain situation. 

But there’s still so. much. uncertainty. Right now, the kids are scheduled to go back to school March 30th. Then their spring break will start on April 8th, to coincide with the start of Passover (as well as Holy Week & Easter). Last year, we hosted a seder for 18 people. Can we do that this time? I have tickets to one concert (locally) in late April, & to another (abroad) in early June - will either one actually be happening?!

These are, decidedly, #firstworldproblems. But I think I join the rest of humanity in being utterly pissed off & daunted by the whole ordeal. Until another few weeks pass, all we can do is wait. And wash our hands a lot. 🧼 💦 🙏🏼

[cdyssey]

Hadestown (7/14/19), Act II

The second half of my thoughts and incoherent rambling from Hadestown! Act I is here.

“Our Lady of the Underground” —

A.K.A. Again, and I cannot stress this enough, but Amber Gray is the love of my life.

She comes out with a flask in her hand, which she surreptitiously sticks into her bra, so she can dance, lololol.

Her energy and vitality are just so infectious. When she smiles, you can't help but smile. When she start giving shout-outs to the musicians, the rumble of pride in her voice echoes throughout Walter Kerr. 

Hermes escorts her at the beginning of the song and then stands off to the side as she sings. He eventually gives her her bouquet of flowers, and she gives him her flask.

“There’s a crack in the WALLLLLLLLLLLLL.” She lifts her flowers into the air as bright [sun]light shines down upon her. It’s an amazing, joyous moment.

“She’s right here waiting in my pay-per-view.” Smirking, Persephone taps her noggin.

“What the boss don’t know, the boss won’t mind.” Having retrieved her flask again, she takes a sip. I got major Prohibition vibes from this line, which is to say that as far as Persephone’s character development goes, you get the sense that she’s ready to rebel against her husband to help our heroes. It’s a big leap from Orpheus’s line about how Persephone is drowning in wine and oblivion.

“Way Down Hadestown (Reprise)” —

OH, this song. THIS SONG MADE ME WEEPY.

So in this one, Eurydice comes out of Hades’s office dressed in worker clothes. She watches in horror as the company workers toil around her, repeating the refrain, “Keep your head low.”

The dichotomy between Persephone looking up at the “crack in the wall,” and the workers keeping their heads low in order to avoid trouble is incredible. Their spirits have been entirely broken, and Eurydice is up next.

She tries to get the workers to acknowledge her, but the Fates mock her for the futility of the action. They’re obviously taking glee at Eurydice’s situation.

Another incredible dichotomy: the jauntiness of “Way Down Hadestown,” which Eurydice once smiled at, and the sinister spin the reprise puts on the chorus. Hermes and Persephone did try to warn her after all.

“Hades laid his hands on you and gave you everlasting life.” HOO BOY—this subversion of religious language was INCREDIBLE.

“Flowers” —

;-;

In “Flowers,” all of the workers except for Eurydice are collapsed on the ground, exhausted and dead to the world. She’s on floor as well, the lone figure lit by light.

“I remember someone / Someone by my side / Turned his face to mine / And then I turned away.” Okay, after I stopped tearing up over these lines, I immediately started tearing up again when I realized that Eurydice doesn’t remember Orpheus’s name.

She doesn’t even know her own.

“Papers” / “Nothing Changes” / “If It’s True”

“Papers” is Hades confronting Orpheus about sneaking into Hadestown. 

When Persephone tries to vouch for Orpheus and Hades tell her, “You stay out of this,” Patrick doesn’t say it as softly as he does on the OBC—he practically yells it at her, and she flinches into silence.

ALSO, GOD, Patrick’s EVIL ENERGY is wiiiiiiild in this one. I love him????

In the “Papers (Instrumental), Hades directs the workers to attack Orpheus, and they, like, beat him up. This is the scene where Timothy lifts him!!

At the end of “Papers,” Orpheus is collapsed on the ground holding his side. He stays like this through “Nothing Changes.”

“Nothing Changes” reminds me of how much the Fates sound like a choir. I love them.

Plot wise, it’s them sowing the first seeds of doubt and defeat into Orpheus’s head. While he initially overcomes their temptations, I think he’s never fully able to shake them away after this, a struggle which carries into “If It’s True.”

Ugh, another song I wish I had the OBC track to listen to for reference, but this one is largely Orpheus’s doubt and idealism warring against each other. If it’s true what the Fates and Hades are saying, he wants to leave, but he’s also not entirely ready to give up. I think this is also the one where he and Eurydice start to rouse the workers’ spirits, showing them that there is hope.

“How Long” —

I love “How Long” so, so much. It might be a contender for my favorite. 

Incredible and moving and vulnerable and tragic. Hades is. Persephone is. They are.

For large parts of the song, they stand on opposite sides of the elevator, which has been lowered so it looks like a pit, a chasm—obviously symbolic of the breach that divides them.

Again, for almost the entire song, Hades never takes his eyes off Persephone, while Persephone turns her head away from him after she’s done singing her verses. I’m so tender for them.

When Hades sings, the lighting changes into a fiery amber, while when Persephone sings, the lighting dulls to a cool blue. It’s an interesting dichotomy. Hades’s makes sense because of his anger and general association with the color red, but I took the blue to symbolize Persephone’s deep sadness. It seeps from her; it pervades the stage.

Lively and joyful she may be most of the time, but deep down on the inside, Persephone is sad.

At one point, they both make it to front stage and stand side by side. Watch their shadows on the floor at this point. It’s a marvelous effect. (Also, watch the shadows on the walls and floor in general! The workers circling the platform in “Chant” especially comes to mind. The lighting in this show is INSANE.)

When they share their final verse, half of the stage is orange, and the other half is blue.

I was emo, y’all.

“Chant” (Reprise) —

In “Chant II,” Hades realizes that Orpheus is rallying his workers. He pulls a lever or something, which signals that they should get back to work, and they do for a couple of “Keep your head lows” until they go into the new refrain of asking why people turn their backs on each other. 

GOD, what a joyous change. Orpheus and Eurydice’s light has given them the courage to question the system for themselves. “Why do we build a wall and then call it freedom?”

Hades grows increasingly angry throughout the reprise. You get the feeling that he’s losing control of his kingdom, and he not only knows it but fears it. He’s frantically trying to grasp onto whatever some semblance of authority he has left.

The thesis of this song is just powerful. If we raise our voices and raise our heads, we can effect change.

“I CONDUCT THE ELECTRIC CITY.” First of all, I LOVE PATRICK PAGE, AND HE ABSOLUTELY DID NOT HAVE TO GO THIS HARD, BUT HE DID BECAUSE HE’S AMAZING, AND DID I MENTION THAT I LOVE HIM??? Secondly, when he sings this line, the lights flash bright before flickering out for a couple of seconds.

While he’s counting down (1... 2... 3...), he angrily stomps down the staircase and crosses over to the side of the stage where Hermes gives him a barstool. He takes it and slams it on the ground to wait for “Epic III.”

“Epic III” —

Not 2 belabor the point, but this entire damn musical made me an emotional wreck, and “Epic III” was no exception. It was a religious experience, at once both simple and sublime.

Right before it starts, Hades slowly snaps his fingers twice in expectation.

Hades doesn't really react to the song until the moment Orpheus sings his first “la, la, las.” At those, he immediately gets up and crosses over to Orpheus, shocked and enraged, fully intending to interrupt him: “Where did you get(?) that melody?” Persephone stops him before he can do anything and implores him to let Orpheus finish.

Of course, he recognizes the melody because it used to be his and Persephone’s once upon a time.

(Hgjkahgjkskjnksjfkjhkashfkj—I was tender.)

Orpheus falters after the interruption, but Hermes, placing a hand on his shoulder, encourages him to keep going.

Anyway, REEVE CARNEY DESERVED A DAMN TONY, PART TWO.

If Hades was spellbound, then the entire theater was, too. A boy and a lyre and a song—it doesn’t seem like much, but it was quite literally everything.

Right before Hades echoes Orpheus, there’s a poignant pause in which Persephone turns to fully face him—she hadn’t quite been looking at him before.

Very softly, very gently, she extends her hands to him... and as soon as they touch, Hades finds his song again: “La la la la la la la.” 

My God, I cried.

At the end of Epic III, the carnation “appears” in Hades’s hand. (Holy hell—I don’t know how he did it; it was really quite like it magically appeared.) 

Persephone wipes tears from her eyes as she holds on to her husband, as they hold on to each other.

Also, this isn’t on the soundtrack, but there’s a brief instrumental between “Epic III” and “Promises” where Hades and Persephone dance. They hold each other so tenderly. Their eyes never leave each other’s faces. The flower is in Hades’s lapel.

It honest to God made me believe in love again. 

“Promises” / “Word to the Wise” / “His Kiss, The Riot”  —

This is awful, but unfortunately, I don’t remember that much of how “Promises” was staged. ;-; I was still being emo over Hades and Persephone because “Epic III” ruined me.

While Eurydice and Orpheus sing, they stand still on the corner of the stage holding each other, her head buried in his shoulder, and his head tucked against her neck. They don’t move. They never let each other go.

Towards the end of “Promises,” Orpheus or Eurydice one convince  the other that the king will let them go now that he’s rediscovered his love again, which takes us into “Word to the Wise.”

As soon as Hades admits that he doesn’t know whether he’ll let them go, Persephone violently parts from him, repulsed that he still hasn’t made up his mind in the right direction.

Just as the Fates had teased and mocked Eurydice during “When the Chips Are Down,” they do the same to Hades here. Their impartial wickedness is so good.

“Give him a rope, and he’ll hang himself.” This advice is definitely the seed for the compromise Hades ends up giving Orpheus. Also, ooooh, fun fact: in Greek mythology, death by hanging has metaphoric resonances of extinguishing one’s voice, which, of course, is a tragedy for a poet, a singer, an artist.

And in the end, he does just as the Fates predicted, doesn’t he?

Ugh, the dark orchestration for “His Kiss, The Riot” is chilling. That accordion??? Incredible.

After the brief instrumental section, he addresses Hermes and conveys his plan to him. This is why Hermes is the one who tells Orpheus, Eurydice, and the workers what’s up in “Wait For Me (Reprise)”.

“Nothing makes a man so bold as a woman’s smile and a hand to hold.” He glances over Persephone as he sings this. 

For the most part, Hades sits on his barstool for this one; it really reminded me of a Shakespearean soliloquy!

“Wait For Me (Reprise)” / “Doubt Comes In” — 

The intro to the reprise is so heavy. Hermes is just weary. He knows what Hades is up to. “Divide and conquer is what it’s called.”

“It’s a trap.” / “It’s a trial.” Orpheus’s newfound skepticism really makes itself apparent in this one. He thinks the world’s out to get him, he doesn’t particularly trust himself or Eurydice anymore. The writing’s on the wall, and Hermes knows it better than anyone: “The dog you really gotta dread is the one that howls inside your head.”

Eurydice and Orpheus singing the “Wait For Me” chorus together is so unbelievably powerful. God, I don’t think there was a dry eye in the house through these last few songs.

“Show the way so we can see. Show the way the world could be.” The company repeats this refrain because they’re literally following Orpheus and Eurydice, too. ;-; I didn’t realize this until I saw it staged.

“Wait for me.” / “I will.” Hades and Persephone stare at each other and grasp hands. He gives her the carnation, and for the rest of the reprise, she holds it up—a small beacon of hope, a vivid pop of color against a woman clothed in black. Bye. I’m crying again.

And then, when Eurydice ends “Wait For Me”—JESSIE SLAYED THESE VERSES—you can see the hope and belief in her face as she begins to follow Orpheus. She has no doubt that he’ll lead her home.

The light shines bright on Eurydice one last time before the entire stage is plunged into darkness for “Doubt Comes In.”

The staging for “Doubt Comes In” is absolutely incredible. Wow. So there are rings on the stage that rotate—various characters utilize them for walking during songs, and they’re used to brilliant effect here.

Orpheus walks along the outer ring in the darkness; it’s so dark that you can’t see Eurydice and the workers behind him, which adds to the notion that he’s alone, entirely alone. When Eurydice or the workers sing, they’re briefly illuminated only to be plunged into the darkness once again.

Orpheus tries to comfort himself by singing his song, but the doubt and the darkness are too much, too overwhelming. He makes it to the final staircase, and the light signifying the outside is the most vivid location onstage.

When the final note rings out, he turns around, and there Eurydice is. She was there all along.

The elevator takes her back to Hadestown as Orpheus collapses to his knees.

“Road to Hell (Reprise)” / Ovation / “We Raise Our Cups” —

You know how I mentioned that Hermes’s footsteps were the only sounds audible at the beginning of “Road to Hell”? The same holds true here as he walks back onto stage, slowly and wearily. He’s sung this song before, but by the gods, as this song tells us, he’ll sing it again and again.

I never realized that they did this until I saw it live, but as the music ascends into a more hopeful mood, the cast members reset the stage, so that it’s almost exactly as it was at the beginning of the musical. They even go through the same scene of Eurydice entering from the cold and lighting her candle. (OH, and I meant to mention this in my Act I write up, but right after Eurydice descends to Hadestown in “Gone, I’m Gone,” Hermes blows her candle out. 😭)

When the cast lined up on the stage for the bows, the whole theater stood up and clapped for at least ten minutes. I was so overwhelmed with pride and love for every single performer on that stage, that I couldn’t help but tear up.

And then, Persephone and Eurydice sing “We Raise Our Cups.” Orpheus is the only one who doesn’t join in, watching silently as the entirety of Hadestown raises their cups to him.

To the world we dream about and the world we live in... this musical was a life-changing experience, and I’m so thankful that I could inhabit Orpheus’s world, even if just for a brief fraction of this eternity.

Stagedoor: —

This was my first stagedoor, and it was so much fun!! The cast was so lovely and nice and obliging.

My friend and I got a picture with Reeve; he’s really good at stagedoor. He took his time with everyone and made sure everyone who wanted a signature or a picture got one!

I didn’t quite know what to say to anyone because I was just so in awe of them, but I had an amazing interaction with Kay! I told her that it was really important to me to see Asian representation on Broadway, and her face lit up! I love her.

[lestered]

nothing to gain

m, 2.4k

what if it only gets colder? would you still wrap me up and tell me that you think this was smart? cause lately i've been scared of even thinking 'bout where we are

a.k.a. hooking up is fun, except when it's for all the wrong reasons.

read on ao3

The time on his phone reads 1:38am by the time he finishes doing up his shoelaces.

He's not good with his laces on a normal day, so naturally he has an even harder time when his hands are shaking.

Yes, shaking. His hands are shaking and there's a lump in his throat and he can feel sweat beginning to prickle around his temples and at the back of his neck, because his entire body is flushed too warm for no reason other than he's nervous.

Nervous for a very stupid reason, at that. Phil's always been one to get nervous for regular hook-ups, but this... isn't a regular hook-up. There's no uncertainty for him to waffle over, no need to plan any moves in advance, no worry that there won't be any chemistry or that he'll underperform. He's done this before. He knows how it works. He knows what to do and how to do it well. Under these circumstances, he should be feeling pretty confident. And if this were a cut-and-dry hook-up, maybe he would.

It's not cut-and-dry though. Nothing with Dan ever is.

It's stressful. Phil's not usually one to overthink things, except for when it comes to Dan. Then he overthinks everything. Which sucks, because Dan is pretty much the only thing that he can't afford to overthink.  

He rubs his hand down over his face in frustration as he stands, pondering his reflection in the mirror. His hair's getting a bit bird-nesty, he could probably stand to cut it. His eyes look a bit bleary from having his contacts in too long. Biting his lip is a nervous habit of his, but he doesn't even realize he's been doing it until he sees how red and raw his bottom lip looks. He likes to tell himself that looks don't matter, but he feels oddly self-conscious right now.

He's considering changing into something a bit more flattering than his jeans and university hoodie when he feels his phone vibrate in his pocket.

dan [1:41am]:  hurry up i want you

There's a mostly pleasant swooping sensation in the pit of his stomach, and that's enough for him to start thinking with his dick again. For now.

He turns out the light and treads quietly out of his bedroom.

*

The third step up from the bottom of the stairs creaks, he reminds himself as he gingerly takes his first few steps down.

Not that it matters, probably. From up here he can tell that the drinking games are still going strong over in the lounge, and it's not like anyone's gonna be listening for him.

He skips over the step anyway.

Going out the front would entail passing through the lounge and all of his housemates, so he opts for the back door. He makes it as far as the darkened kitchen before the light switches on and there's a soft throat-clearing noise behind him.

"Right then, Lester, where're you off to?"

He doesn't have to stop. He could pretend he doesn't hear her, keep walking on out the door, and be chastised in the morning.

But he doesn't have the balls to do that, and they both know it. So he pauses and sighs and turns around.

Addy looks quite nice tonight. Her slim-fit navy dress really brings out the blue in her eyes, and her jet-black hair falls smoothly over her shoulders. They get mistaken for siblings sometimes, though Phil's quite sure that their resemblance doesn't extend anywhere beyond hair and eye color. And his hair isn't even natural.

It's the first that he's seen of her tonight. She must have just got back from her date, then.

She looks nice, but she also looks confused in spite of her mildly accusatory tone of voice.

"That's a pretty necklace." He says lamely, glancing down at the little silver pendant resting just below her collarbone as a convenient means of avoiding eye contact. "Did Sam give it to you? Happy anniversary by the way, how was dinner?"

"It was good. He's already starting to get pissed out there with the rest of them. Also, you're shit at deflecting. Tell me where you're going."

"Does it matter? I'm an adult." It's meant to be a joke, kind of, but it really just comes out sounding incredibly stupid, even for him. He shouldn't try to go on the defensive, like, ever. Especially with Addy. Even considering that she's his best friend, he still finds her ability to consistently see right through him a little unnerving.

"Maybe. Technically." She shrugs, and crosses her arms. She doesn't look mad or intimidating. Just... determined. "I'm just a bit surprised to see you headed out when everyone just told me that you'd gone up to bed for the night."

He's about to respond with some on-the-spot, half-assed lie before he's interrupted by another vibration in his pocket.

He's not the only one who notices. Her eyes flicker briefly to his pocket, and then back up at him again.

"You're going to see him." It's a statement, not a question. Her voice has gone a bit softer, and he hates that. Not because he hates softness in general, but he knows that she hasn't changed her tone to be gentle. She's changed it because she feels bad for him.

He sighs and deflates a little. "How do you know it's him? It could be someone else."

"I guess." She steps closer. Her heels make it so that she's much closer to eye level with him than usual. "I just don't know why you'd be sneaking out the back for anyone but him."

"We're good at fucking each other." He shrugs and shoves his hands into the pocket of his hoodie. Maybe the abrupt change of subject will throw her off. Just a little. Just for a minute. He needs to level the playing field somehow. "It's just sex. It's fun. No one's getting hurt."

"I don't believe that." Her reply is instantaneous. "And I don't think you do, either."

He's quiet for a moment and he wills his voice not to sound as pathetic as he feels when he speaks up again.

"Dan's not a bad person."

"I know he's not, babe." Another quick reply. He knows that she means it. She and Dan had gotten on quite well before the... unpleasantness.

They've had this talk a million times over the past month. It's not healthy, it's not healthy, it's not healthy. I know you still love him but it's not healthy. You'll never get over him if you keep having these backslides.

Maybe I don't want to get over him. He never actually says that bit out loud. Then he'd never hear the end of it.

"He broke your heart though, yeah?"

He didn't want to. But...

"...Yeah."

He doesn't say anything else. She doesn't either, for a while. He reckons she's resigned, which he can't help but feel bad about. Her heart's in the right place. He's just weak.

His hand twitches instinctively towards his pocket when he feels another vibration. Then, her hand comes to rest on his cheek.

"Just be safe, alright?"

He's ready to make some cheeky comment about Dan's impressive stash of free condoms from the student center in an attempt to break the tension or lighten the mood or something, but she cuts in before he can get a word out, like she's already read his mind.

"Not like that. I mean watch out for yourself. Think about what you're doing and make sure that you really believe that it's what's best for you. And for him."  

He stands still there for a minute after she walks out. He owes it to her to at least let her words sink in before reaching into his pocket to see what those two little vibrations were about.

dan [1:43am]:  i might just start without you if you don't get your ass over here soon :p

dan [1:45am]: phiiiiiiiiiilllllllllll :(

He does have a choice here, he knows that. But the undeniable ache in his chest makes him feel like he really, really doesn't.

*

The soft, pitchy breath that Dan stifles into his shoulder when he finally bottoms out, after an agonizing minute of working himself slowly down on Phil's cock, is objectively the best sound in the world. He soaks it up and holds onto it every single time, on the dreaded chance that he might never get to hear it again. The possibility is always there. It could happen any day.

"Fuck." Dan's nails dig deep into his shoulder blades. "Give me a sec. I swear your dick got bigger since last time."

"Last time was less than a week ago." Phil reminds him, deliberately letting his breath ghost over Dan's neck as he winds his arms securely around his waist. It has the desired effect; Dan shudders and relaxes a bit. "And it definitely didn't. You're just not prepped enough, you got impatient."

He receives only a delayed hmph in response, and he has to smirk. Because Dan doesn't want to admit that he's right, but it's kind of impossible for either of them to deny.

"Right, c'mere." His voice goes softer than intended and he slides one hand up to tangle into Dan's hair. Dan obliges and tilts his head before Phil can even tell him to. "Relax." He murmurs in between hot, wet kisses to Dan's neck, particularly all the sensitive spots that he's had memorized for what feels like ages. "You feel so fucking good."

He does. Dan's warmth clenching around him so tight that he can't move is actually bordering on too much. Bordering, because he doesn't think that 'too much' is really a part of his vocabulary when it comes to Dan. With Dan, he always wants more.

So he chases it.

Instant gratification, that's what this is. That's why they do this. That's what he tells himself when Dan starts rocking against him, that's what he tells himself when he grabs onto Dan's hips hard enough to bruise and guides him down harder and faster, that's what he tells himself when Dan's panting and moaning and begging for more, that's what he tells himself when he flips them over and pounds into him with total abandon because he knows they're right on the limit. That's what he tells himself when Dan's legs start to shake and his eyes flutter shut and he clenches around him, and that's what he tells himself when his hips stutter and he buries himself deep inside one last time and collapses almost before the relief of his orgasm finishes washing over him.

Then he rolls off, so they're laid side by side with their bodies limp and boneless and their chests flushed and hearts pounding. Phil lets his eyes fall shut, then, because this is the part where they stop bullshitting themselves.

"I love you." Dan whispers, and hands him a couple tissues.

He sighs, opens his eyes and hastily cleans off the mess of Dan's cum that's painted onto his chest and stomach.

"Yeah. I love you too."

*

The only light in the room now comes from the cheap fairy lights that Dan's strung up on the wall behind his bed. They cast a dim glow onto the bottle of Malibu that Dan's rolling in between his hands - the one he keeps by the side of his bed that makes him look like an alcoholic, though it's really just there to stay safe from his housemates given their tendency to steal any liquor they can get their hands on.

"You sure you don't want any?" Dan offers, and Phil just shakes his head and slides down under the covers. "Had enough earlier. Everyone kept fucking me over in Kings."

"Explains why it took you so fucking long to get here." Dan takes a decent pull from the bottle and then sets it down before joining him under the covers. He holds an arm out and Phil curls into him, head resting on Dan's shoulder.

"No, I tried to get here quick. Addy stopped me on the way out, though."

"Oh." Dan's body stills, and for a few moments the room lapses into a tense silence. "She told you not to come, I guess."

He doesn't deny it, because there's really no use. "I came anyway, though, didn't I?"

"She must fucking hate me now."

"She doesn't."

It's too dark to really read Dan's expression, but Phil can sense that he's being cast a very skeptical look.

"She doesn't." He repeats. "She's just worried. About both of us. 'Cause, you know..." He trails off. He doesn't need to say it; Dan knows.

"It's better this way." Dan mumbles. "I'm a shit boyfriend, Phil. I'm just like, a shit person altogether. I have no idea what I'm doing with my life, I've just as good as flunked out of law school. Some day I'm gonna start to drag you down too much, this way you're off the hook. You can just... leave. No strings."

Phil doesn't respond. This is another conversation he's had a million times. Another conversation that just goes around in circles. It doesn't seem to matter how many times he tells Dan that it's too late for no strings. That's not something that works retroactively. Not for him.

It seems to make sense to Dan that they still fuck basically every week, that they still say I love you, but they somehow can't be together. Phil's not sure if they broke up because Dan just doesn't care, or if Dan thinks that Phil doesn't care. Surely it can't be that. How many times has he told Dan that he loves him in spite of everything, that he wants him complete with all of his flaws? The same way that Dan wants him... or wanted him, at one point. He doesn't know anymore.

Because he knows Dan isn't the type to suddenly stop caring about something, or someone. Dan cares a whole fucking lot. But something gets in the way sometimes. Something unreadable, that makes the light go out in his eyes. Phil knows he can't replace that light, he's tried. But god damn, he at least wants to help find something that can.

"Does this feel like no strings to you?" Phil asks quietly. Maybe Dan will listen to himself, if he can't listen to Phil.

"No."

Phil waits a moment for him to elaborate, but he doesn't. "Me neither. What if it stays that way?"

Dan doesn't respond, but he does rest his cheek down on top of Phil's head when he scoots in closer.

They're both hanging onto something, surely. The question is whether they're hanging onto the same thing.

He's not so sure he wants to know.

*

for @phandomficfests shuffle mode; song prompt: waiting game by banks

[marjansmarwani]

all the difference in the world 

2.7k || ao3

Carlos and his partner Mya respond to the hostage situation call. --- A 2x05 coda (a.k.a if the writers won’t give Carlos scenes, I will.)

This was mostly written out of spite. Mostly beta’d by @officereyes, but any errors in the part I added after are on me and me alone. 

---------

“I’m just saying, I can’t believe you didn’t invite me to the roller derby.” 

“I’m sorry, I had no idea it would be your thing,” Carlos shot back defensively. 

His partner turned to look at him for the briefest of moments with an entirely unimpressed expression, “It’s badass women on roller skates, Reyes. What exactly about that sounds like ‘not my thing’?” 

Carlos rolled his eyes. “I’ll be sure to invite you next time, Esquilin,” he promised, “as long as you don’t mind hanging out with TK’s crew.” 

“I think the badass women on roller skates can balance out the company of firefighters,” she quipped, shooting Carlos a grin, “probably.” 

He rolled his eyes again, but his retort was interrupted when their radio sounded from the dashboard, “Be advised, all units: Code 3 at 235 Heyward St, unit 3F. Hostage situation, suspect is armed and dangerous.” 

Carlos shot Mya a look and she nodded, flipping on the lights and sirens as she took the next left, bringing them closer to the emergency in progress. 

“Dispatch, this is 363-H-20, responding. ETA 8 minutes,” he announced into the radio before replacing it on the dashboard, a grim set to his mouth as he stared out the window at the houses they sped by. 

“I hate domestic calls,” Mya eventually said into the silence and Carlos nodded grimly. They had both seen calls like this end badly, and he knew they were both desperately hoping to never have to see that again. “Where did they say she was?” 

“Third floor.” He glanced at his partner to see her biting her lip as she considered, “Why?” 

“I’m just trying to figure out how we can possibly get up there without tipping him off. Dispatch said he was armed, we don’t want him spooked. That’s not going to end well for anyone, especially not her.” 

Carlos nodded, trying to focus on the problem rather than the possible disastrous outcomes. He and Mya had responded to a similar call almost two years ago now and that one had not ended happily. It was one of his experiences on the force that had affected him most and one he still thought about from time to time, especially on bad days. But it was also an experience that didn’t help them now. If they wanted to make sure that didn’t happen again he needed to focus on the now. 

Which was all well and good, but he didn’t know they were supposed to get a victim out of a third-floor apartment before they breached without anyone getting caught in a crossfire. They didn’t have the time, resources, or training to scale the building to approach that way. The only way in was the stairs and the door. 

He looked over at Mya who met his gaze with an equally frustrated expression. Clearly, she had not come up with any brilliant ideas either. He sighed and leaned back in his seat. It’s not that he thought he and Mya were incapable of coming up with creative solutions. But after spending so much time about the 126 he had a new standard for “creative,” and honestly he could use some of that insanity he witnessed on a regular basis right now. 

“We just need a way to get her out,” Mya said eventually as they drew closer to their destination, “once she is safe we can handle the guy. I just don’t want to risk her getting caught in a possible crossfire.” 

Carlos nodded and opened his mouth to ask his partner if she had any brilliant ideas to make that happen when he froze, a half-formed thought popping into his head. Without saying a word to Mya he reached for the radio again, switching it on to call dispatch: “Dispatch, are there any available fire units in the area of the Code 3?” 

“The 226 is in the vicinity and available.” 

Carlos glanced over at Mya, who had pulled her eyes off the road long enough to give him a baffled look. He smiled at her before he spoke into the radio again, “Dispatch, can they respond to the address in question and deploy the rescue cushion?” 

He saw the dawning realization on his partner’s face as he waited. She beamed at him even as the voice of the dispatch supervisor sounded over the radio, “Affirmative, 363-H-20. The 226 is en route and will have the rescue cushion deployed in time for your ETA.” 

“10-4 dispatch, we’re about 4 minutes out now.” 

He replaced the radio and turned to look at his partner, who shot him a knowing grin, “Only someone who has spent a little too much time around firefighters could come up with an idea as crazy as that.” 

He scoffed at her, “Crazy enough that it might just work, you mean.” 

She shook her head, still grinning, and Carlos sighed and leaned back in his seat, grin fading. “I hope it does work,” he admitted more somberly. “I don’t want this to be a repeat of…” 

“There’s no point in thinking like that,” Mya interrupted sharply, “that was a long time ago. And there’s no saying this is going to turn out the same way. Not if we have any say in it. We’re already in better shape than we were then. We’re not going to make the same mistakes.”

Carlos nodded tightly and they continued their ride in silence. He knew Mya was right and that they had prepared in every possible way. They had done all they could, but there were still so many variables. There always were. Working with people in crisis was never an exact science and there was always a chance that nothing went according to plan. 

They arrived at the scene and Carlos was out of the vehicle before Mya had even brought it to a complete stop, rushing over to the team unfurling the rescue cushion. The captain looked up as Carlos approached, “We’re just about ready to give the go-ahead,” he called, “we’re all set on our end!”

Carlos nodded gratefully and turned on his heel, meeting Mya’s eyes and jerking his head towards the building. She followed without question, waving for the other officers who had just arrived to follow them. They headed up the stairs as quickly and quietly as possible and Carlos did his best to avoid the creeping feeling of dread. He knew they had done everything they could, but that didn’t stop the fear that it might somehow still end in tragedy.

They had just approached the last flight of stairs when the scream ripped through the air. They froze as one, all waiting to hear the outcome. Carlos was nearly toppled by the relief of hearing the voices of the firefighters drifting up, assuring her that she was safe now. He could feel Mya’s hand on his arm and glanced over his shoulder to give her a quick smile. The victim was safe. From here, it was all simple. 

He gave a nod to the other officers gathered behind him and they resumed their journey upwards, entering the hallway and barreling through the door. The man spun to face them from the railing, a look of shock covering his features. Carlos held his gaze as he ordered him to put his hands up, and he saw the moment he made a decision. Dispatch had mentioned that this was his third strike; he knew there was no happy ending in this for him. 

He lunged for the gun in the same moment that Carlos thrust himself fully into the room, grabbing him before he could achieve his goal, stopping his hands mere millimeters from the gun. He could feel the collective sigh of relief from his fellow officers, as well as his partner’s gaze on the back of his neck. He ignored it, for the moment, as he wrestled the man’s arms behind his back, slapping the cuffs on him as he read him his rights. He stood then, pulling the suspect up with him as Mya stepped further into the room. She glanced over at the two officers behind them before addressing the pair: “We’ll take this loser down and get him to the station, can you two do a quick sweep and make sure all’s good here?” 

They nodded and Mya gave them a quick thanks before taking the suspect from Carlos and guiding him towards the stairs. Carlos gave his own thanks to the other two officers and quickly followed. He could tell his partner had something on her mind, but he also knew she wouldn’t say anything about it until they had the suspect safely secured in the back of their squad car. They descended the stairs in silence before eventually exiting the building back into the parking lot where the 226 was in the process of packing up the rescue cushion and the victim was getting checked out by the paramedics. 

Upon seeing his ex their cuffed suspect made to lunge in her direction but Carlos stepped between them, blocking his line of sight and staring down at him coldly, “Don’t even think about it.” 

He deflated and Mya scoffed as she pulled him in the direction of the squad car, opening the door and guiding him inside without a word. Once the door was closed behind him she turned to face Carlos, eyebrows raised and an unimpressed look on her face, “You wanna talk about what happened up there?” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, we got the guy.” 

“Yes, we did. After you threw yourself in between him and his gun and our guns too, I might add.”

“Mya…” he began, but she held up her hand to stop him. 

“I’m not trying to scold you, Carlos, especially because I can’t say I wouldn’t have done the same thing. I’m just asking you to be a little bit more careful, okay? We take enough risks as it is, you really don’t need to go out of your way to create more. I kind of like you as a partner so I would appreciate it if you could manage to not get yourself shot if you don’t mind.” 

“Aw, you do care.” 

“I will deny that in a court of law,” she countered without missing a beat. 

He grinned at her and she sighed before shaking her head and walking back around to the driver’s side. “Just remember I’m not going to be the one to tell your boyfriend you got yourself shot,” she called over her shoulder, “so maybe avoid that if at all possible.” 

He chuckled, but her words also ignited a hint of anxiety in his chest. He had followed his instincts and he didn’t regret it, but now that the adrenaline was gone and he had the advantage of hindsight he could see how badly that could have gone. But he also knew that dwelling on it would accomplish nothing. He had spent a career trusting his instincts and he knew that was the best way to approach this. He knew that trusting himself was the best chance he had. 

That didn’t lessen the risks and the fact that he had so much more to lose now than he ever had before.  

As he opened the passenger door he glanced across the scene to see the woman sitting in the back of the ambulance, talking to another officer who was taking her statement. Her expression of relief was evident even from this distance, and Carlos smiled. This reality was better than any of the anxieties running through his head and he would focus on that. Today had been a win. They didn’t always get those, Carlos knew that all too well. They had to take the successes they could get, and savor those. Focusing on what-ifs never helped anybody. 

Today they had won and the would-be victim had her life back. Today they had managed to get the ex before the worst had happened and that made all the difference in the world. 

--------

Carlos looked up as his front door swung open, a smile spreading across his face when he saw his boyfriend and Paul crossing the threshold. TK met his eyes and matched his smile as he crossed the room towards him, “Hey, babe.” 

Carlos met him at the edge of the counter, pulling him into a kiss that lingered. When they finally pulled apart, he grinned at TK, “Hey yourself.” He looked over TK’s shoulder to Paul, “Hi Paul.” 

“What, no kiss for me Reyes?” 

Carlos rolled his eyes fondly as TK chuckled, setting the grocery bags he had brought on the counter to start unloading them. Carlos grabbed some of the groceries from him, stealing another quick kiss in the process before he glanced between the two firefighters, “No Mateo and Marjan tonight?”

“They’ll be here,” Paul explained, “they’re just handling a situation right now.” 

Carlos raised an eyebrow, “That sounds like a story.” 

“It is,” TK confirmed as he put the last of the groceries into the fridge, closing it behind him, “and we’ll tell you as soon as you tell me what you might know about the 226 having to deploy a rescue cushion under a third-floor balcony at the request of APD.” 

Carlos smiled sheepishly, “You heard about that, huh?” 

“Austin’s a small town, Carlos,” TK reminded him with a sly grin, “and the fire department is even smaller. There’s not much I don’t hear about.”

Carlos looked past TK to Paul who raised an eyebrow, settling onto the couch to watch them, “We’ll tell you ours after you tell us yours.”

Carlos made a face at him before turning back to meet TK’s expectant gaze, “It was nothing major. There was a hostage situation in a third-floor apartment and we just needed to make sure that she was safely out of the line of fire before we went to take down the guy.” 

TK moved closer to him, wrapping his arms around Carlos as he peered up into his eyes, “It sounds pretty major to me. Your idea probably saved her life, Carlos. She’s safe because of you.” 

Carlos shrugged self-consciously, “I wouldn’t say that. Grace did most of the work, figuring it all out and keeping her on the line.”

TK shook his head and removed one of his hands from Carlos’s waist to turn his face so their gazes met, “Grace is brilliant and certainly deserves a lot of credit, but you had a hand in it too babe, don’t sell yourself short.” 

Carlos studied TK’s eyes. They were sincere and full of love; so much it nearly overwhelmed him. His boyfriend meant every word he had said, and he was not about to let Carlos get away with arguing. The amount of faith TK had in him staggered him sometimes. He let himself smile and gave TK a nod. At his nod TK smiled wider, leaning in for another kiss before stepping away. 

Paul chuckled from the couch, “I’ve gotta hand it to you Carlos, that was pretty crafty. It definitely worked but it was also a little crazy. Almost like something a certain someone else I know might have tried.” 

Both Carlos and Paul’s gazes turned to TK, who looked at them indignantly, “What?” he demanded, but Paul just laughed. 

“I think he might be rubbing off on you,” he informed Carlos with a raised eyebrow. 

Carlos huffed a laugh in return but reached out an arm to wind around TK’s shoulders and pull him closer, placing a kiss on the inside of his neck. “Maybe,” he admitted, “but who’s to say that’s a bad thing?” 

Paul rolled his eyes and TK smiled smugly, twisting in Carlos’s grasp to face him, leaning forward to give him another kiss. When he pulled away his expression grew more serious as he studied Carlos’s expression intently. 

“Are you sure you’re okay?” he asked, “I know how you feel about domestic calls.” 

Carlos pulled him closer again, placing a light kiss on the top of his head, “I’m okay,” he assured him with a certainty that almost surprised him, “really.” 

TK grinned at him and Carlos smiled back, looking up and meeting Paul’s gaze as well and giving him a reassuring nod. Of course he was fine; he had everything he could possibly ever need right here in his arms. He was fine because despite it all today had been a good day, but he also because knew that even if it hadn’t been, he had a second family now and they would catch him should he fall.

[mikotyzini]

Beach Day

Pairing: White Rose Words: 2275

Another Patreon reward!  These prompts have been seriously cute so far.

“Alllllright!” Dropping her bag on the ground, Ruby extended both hands towards the expanse of blue in front of her.  “Team RWBY beach day!  A full day of fun and relaxing and soaking up the sun!”

“It’s really nice out, too,” Blake commented while laying her beach towel out on a patch of sand.  Yang did the same (right next to Blake’s, of course), before clapping her hands together once.

“I know what we should do first!” she said, grinning at what was probably an awesome idea.  “We should race to the buoy!”

“Yes!” Ruby instantly agreed, pumping one fist in the air at the suggestion.  She was already ready to race Yang to the waves, but stopped when she saw Weiss sit down on a towel instead of joining them in the fun.

“Weiss?” she asked, watching her partner unpack her beach bag - pulling out sunglasses and a bottle of water.  “Don’t you want to race with us?”

“No, thank you.”

“Aw come on!” Yang replied.  “It’ll be fun! Fair warning though - you’ll probably lose.”  

While Yang snickered at the boast, Ruby watched Weiss for an answer.

“l don’t want to,” she said, leveling Yang with a glare.  “Go ahead without me.”

“But it’s a competition!  You love competitions!”

“Not this one.”

“How is this one different?”

“It just is.”

“But -”

“No.”

While the two volleyed words back and forth, Ruby watched like someone sitting in the stands at a tennis match.  The contest ended in a weird stalemate that neither she nor Yang understood - because they loved racing to the buoy!  It was something they did every time they came to the beach, even though Yang always won.

Eventually, Yang gave up and shrugged - forfeiting the argument.  Meanwhile, Weiss huffed and pulled her scroll out of her bag.

The two of them had these mini-arguments pretty often, but this one felt different than the others.  Sure, Weiss could be difficult and stubborn, and she wouldn’t do anything she didn’t want to do, but her resistance this time was...weird.  That’s the only way Ruby could describe it.

“What do you think, Ruby?” Yang asked.  “Wanna race?”

When Weiss huffed again, voicing her displeasure about something, Ruby scrambled to think of an alternative plan for the day.  She wanted everyone to have a good time!  Which meant she needed to figure out why Weiss wasn’t having a good time.

Best Partner Duties coming right up!

“l wanna get a snowcone first!” she answered, spotting the cart nearby and pointing towards it.  “Then we’ll race!”

Glancing over her shoulder and spotting the snow cone cart, Yang shrugged again and grinned.  “Sounds good.  Get me an orange one?”

“Sure!  Blake - do you want one?”

Before answering, Blake looked at Yang - who nodded enthusiastically.

“Might as well try one,” she finally answered.  

“They’re great - I promise!” Ruby added for extra-convincing power.  “What flavor?  They have strawberry, watermelon, raspberry, blue raspberry - although I’m not sure how they taste different - regular melon, blueberry -”

“Orange,” Blake interrupted before Ruby could rattle off the entire list.  “I’ll try an orange one, too.”

Giving Blake a thumbs up, Ruby was silently grateful it was an easy order to remember.  Turning around, she smiled at Weiss.

“Can you come with me?” she asked.  “I can’t carry all those by myself.”

“Of course.”  

Immediately putting her scroll away, Weiss stood up and smiled.  

See?  This was what made Weiss’ earlier resistance so weird!  She was usually pretty willing to participate when Ruby asked.  So, like...why wouldn’t she race to the bouy?  That’s what Ruby was going to find out!  Because Weiss wouldn’t tell Yang, but she had to tell Ruby the truth - that was part of a promise she’d made.

“Are you excited for a day off?” Ruby asked, waiting for Weiss to reach her so they could walk side-by-side over to the snow cone vendor.

“Of course.  It’s nice to relax for a day.”

“Yeah, absolutely!”  Hopping with that answer, Ruby then settled into a normal walk and snuck a glance at Weiss as they joined the back of the line to order.

“So, uh...what do you have against racing to the buoy?”

Weiss sighed at the question.

“I’m guessing that if I try to avoid answering that, you’ll pout and point out the first rule of our ‘best partner’ agreement?”

“You know it!”

Weiss sighed again, but she didn’t seem too upset by the response.  This was why they’d made the Best Partner Agreement, after all!  For times like these - when one of them didn’t want to say something potentially embarrassing and the other really, really wanted to know.

And to grow closer as partners and stuff like that…

“Ok,” Weiss said, looking slightly hesitant.  “Can I tell you a secret?”

“Of course!”

Ruby loved Weiss’ secrets.  It made her feel so special that Weiss trusted her with such important information!  And boy did she have some humdingers!  Like how -

Well, those were secrets.  Ruby kept them locked away in a special vault in her mind, but she loved adding new ones!

“Ok, well...”

Pausing for a second, Weiss glanced around in search of anyone eavesdropping on their conversation.  Finding no one to be concerned about, she still dropped her voice to a whisper.

“I kind of...can’t swim.”

“You - what?  Really?”

Had Ruby heard that right?  Weiss Schnee - the girl who could do literally anything - couldn’t swim?  

“What’ll you two ladies have?” the snow cone man broke in, glancing between the two of them while waiting for their order.

“Oh, uhhh…”  Racking her brain, Ruby searched for what Blake and Yang had asked for.

“They both wanted orange,” Weiss gently reminded her.

“Right!  Two oranges and - can you make one that’s half raspberry and half blue-raspberry?”

When the man nodded, Ruby grinned and turned to the side so Weiss could order.

“I’m fine, thank you,” she replied, waving the man off but pulling a ten Lien note from her wallet.

“Aww Weiss!  You don’t have to pay!”

“I’d like to,” Weiss replied, leveling Ruby with an expression she hadn’t yet figured out a way to say ‘no’ to.

“Okk…” she said instead, then smiled when two orange piles of shaved ice appeared in the holding stand in front of them.  A half red, half blue snow cone appeared seconds later, which she picked up and took a big bite of while Weiss paid.

“They do taste different!” Ruby exclaimed, staring at the cone in her hand before taking another bite.

“Are you sure?”  Giving Ruby a teasing smile, Weiss picked up Blake and Yang’s to carry back to their teammates.

“Pretty sure!  The blue one is more...blue-y…”

Weiss’ musical laugh put a smile on Ruby’s face in a heartbeat.  And with a considerable amount of good cheer, Ruby decided she was getting to the bottom of Weiss’ unhappiness with the beach - and solving it!  

“So...about that swimming thing?”

“It never came up, so I never learned,” Weiss replied with a Yang-esque shrug.  “It’s not a huge deal.  Just...is.”

With that simple answer out in the open, Weiss walked over to their teammates and distributed the orange snow cones before sitting down on her towel.  Nearly finished with her own, Ruby watched Weiss’ demeanor and tried to figure out why she was still bothered by the situation even though she knew the answer.

Maybe it was because Weiss seemed...almost sad?  Embarrassed?  Disappointed? She was really hard on herself when she did something wrong - like missing a question on a test or missing one of their team moves.  Was she being hard on herself for not knowing how to swim?  

That was fixable!  Being a super team leader and partner-extraordinaire, Ruby could figure out a way to teach Weiss how to swim and keep her secret safe.  Right?  She totally could.

Turning in a slow circle, she searched the beach for ideas that could help her accomplish her goal.  There was a lot going on, so there had to be something she could use.  Snow cone man, joggers, sunbathers, umbrellas, surfers, two people carrying a kayak, some kids building a sand castle -

An idea popped into her mind - and it only took the rest of her snow cone for a plan to form.

“I’ll be right back!” she told her team before bounding over to the two kids playing in the wet sand near the waves.

“Hey guys!” she said, capturing the attentions of a little boy and girl who must be around seven - a.k.a. the best age to be.  “How’s it going?”

“Goooood!” they responded in near unison.

“I love your castle!” she added, pointing towards a big pile of sand without any smooth walls.  “It looks like an ant king lives here or something.”

“Yeah!” the little boy said, grinning at the idea.  “An ant king and his ant soldiers!”

“And a butterfly queen!” the little girl added with a smile.

Chuckling at the response, Ruby glanced at her teammates and found Weiss watching her.

“Uh, so I was wondering if you two could help me with something!” she said, smiling at the two eager kids in front of her.  “Do you know how to swim?”

When both of them nodded, she grinned.

“That’s great!  But can you pretend you don’t know how to swim for a little bit?  If you do, I’ll give you twenty Lien!”

From the way their eyes widened, she could’ve just offered them a million Lien.  She hadn’t, because she wasn’t rich.  But fortunately, their little kid minds readily agreed.

“Yeah?” she asked, getting several more enthusiastic nods.  “Ok, go tell your parents, then meet me by the water!”

Abandoning their plastic shovels and pails at the ant-castle, the two kids ran off to inform their parents while Ruby hurried back to her teammates.

“Hey guys!” she called out when she was within earshot.  “Come on!  You’ve gotta come with me!!”

“What?” Blake asked, marking her place in her book with one finger.  “Why?”

“I can’t tell you right now,” Ruby fibbed.  “But I have a great idea - I know you’ll like it!”

Blake narrowed her eyes - silently saying she didn’t quite believe those words - but her gaze drifted to the side when Yang popped to her feet.

“I’m in for the mystery challenge!” she said, raising her hand to give Ruby a high-five.

“Yes!” Ruby replied, slapping Yang’s hand and grinning at the current success of her plan.  With Yang’s agreement, Blake would agree next.  And Weiss wouldn’t want to be left out, so…

“I suppose I’ll join you,” Weiss said, pushing herself up from her beach towel.  “Where are we going?”

“To the water!” Ruby declared, pointing towards the ocean.  

Yang and Blake headed that way without a second thought, but Weiss grabbed Ruby’s elbow before she could follow.

“Ruby -”

“Don’t worry, Weiss,” Ruby replied, winking at her partner.  “Your secret’s safe with me!”

Weiss was reluctant, but she followed Ruby regardless.  Together, they met up with Yang and Blake at the edge of the beach - where the waves started washing over their ankles.  Turning to the side, Ruby grinned when she saw the two little kids racing down the sand to them.

“I had a great idea!” Ruby said while the kids careered to a stop by her side.  “I thought we’d teach these guys how to swim!  Right?”

When she looked down at her willing participants, they obediently nodded and smiled.

“That sounds like fun!” Yang replied, kneeling down in front of the kids.  “You guys want to be on Team Yang, right?  Cuz I’m the best swimmer.”

“Yeah!” both agreed, making Yang look up at Blake with a grin.

“You two help them,” Ruby directed, pointing between her teammates and the kids.  “Weiss and I will demonstrate!”

When everyone nodded in agreement, Ruby led them out in the shallows - where the water came up to about their stomachs and a little past the elbows of the kids.  

“Ok, so it’s real easy!” she said.  “We’ll hold you up in the water, and you move your arms like this -” she made a windmilling gesture with both arms.  “While kicking your feet up and down!  Watch!”

Motioning for Weiss to hold her arms out, Ruby leaned forward onto her partner’s outstretched arms, dunked her head into the water, then started rowing her arms and kicking her feet like she’d just shown them.  After doing that for a few moments, she stood up and wiped the water out of her eyes.

“Now you guys try!” she said, grinning at her enthusiastic disciples.

The little boy and girl practically dove into Blake and Yang’s arms before kicking up a storm - splashing water everywhere while Yang laughed and Blake smiled in amusement.  Meanwhile, Ruby held out her arms for Weiss.

“You too, Weiss!  You can’t make me do all the demonstrations by myself!”

When Weiss looked at her - clearly figuring out the entire plan at that moment - Ruby grinned.  Weiss smiled in return, then leaned forward and kissed Ruby on the cheek.

“You’re the best partner I could’ve asked for,” Weiss whispered before laying down in Ruby’s arms as instructed.

Stunned by the response, which was way more appreciative than Ruby had expected, she held Weiss steady while she kicked and rowed her arms.

Ruby was just doing what any good partner would do, so it was no big deal, really!  But good thing they were standing in water, because her cheeks were on fire.

[maybeformepersonally]

Fic: Coincidences mean you're on the right path

Title: Coincidences mean you're on the right path Author: maybeformepersonally Rating: G / General Audiences Summary: Dan had been watching Amazingphil since he was a teenager. He never thought they would actually meet, of course, and so he is understandably surprised when Phil walks into the room. Word Count: 4055 Author’s Note: Written for the Phandom Fic Fest Bingo, for the square “Fandom AU”. This is a canon divergence AU where they never met in 2009, and Dan never started making videos or became an internet cult leader. Now, it’s 2018 and they unexpectedly cross paths. Read on AO3

Dan’s had a stressful day at work, to say the least. This, coupled with staying up much later than he should have last night for an impromptu, ill-advised Netflix marathon is almost enough to tempt him into skipping the gym for the day. Almost, but not quite, as he knows he’ll struggle to fall asleep if he doesn’t tire himself out. It’s for a noble cause, he tells himself, and drags himself there, albeit grudgingly.

 He’s in a mood today. It’s the only reason why he’s dragging his feet, really. He knows he’ll get into it as soon as he starts, that’s what always happens. And he understands how crucial exercise is for his mental health. It really has helped a lot since he’d taken it up two years ago. He allows himself a pout and some internal grumbling about it anyway.

 Well, as it turns out, he will never be so grateful for his hard-earned discipline, for if he had caved to temptation, he would have missed out.

 He’s quite at home in the machine room, doing his own thing with headphones on, as usual, jogging on the treadmill, when none other than Phil Lester, a.k.a. Amazingphil, a.k.a. the star of an embarrassingly large amount of Dan’s teenage fantasies (and also an occasional star of a few current ones), struts into the machine room and sits down on the fucking Leg Press Machine directly in Dan’s line of sight.

 Dan barely avoids faceplanting on the treadmill in shock.

 The next thirty minutes are a test to his already frayed nerves that Dan wouldn’t have expected to pass, but somehow he managed to play it cool and he doesn’t stare too obviously (he hopes) nor does he make a complete fool of himself in front of his kind-of-celebrity crush (he thinks), dealing a fatal blow to his self-esteem and ruining one of his favourite places to unwind in one fell swoop.

 They’re both wearing headphones, and he’s still starstruck and a bit shocked that Amazingphil of all people just walked into his regular gym in a tight green t-shirt that brings out his eyes and tight black shorts that bring out… other assets, so he doesn’t even try to strike up a conversation. He’s too nervous, anyway, he’d probably embarrass himself, and then he’d be out of a gym because there is no way he’d come back here if that were to happen. He doesn’t want to have to scope out gyms again, that way lies madness.

 So Dan finishes his set, grabs his things, and he nods to Amazingphil as he leaves. And he doesn’t go hide in the bathroom for a little freak out; he can freak out at home, like a functional adult.

 Now, Dan isn’t the huge fan of youtube he used to be when he was a teenager, but he still follows a few channels religiously. Amazingphil and PhilGAMES are the only ones he has the notifications on for, because he may be a grown man and a professional these days, but Phil still holds a special place in his heart. (So what if he never got over his teenage crush, have you seen Phil’s smile? He’s only human, and there’s nothing wrong with a harmless crush on an unattainable sort-of-celebrity. Sue him.)

 ***

Phil came out officially a few years ago, but it’s been pretty obvious that he was bi from way back on his early days of youtube, so when he tries going to the gym and decides to make a video about what a disaster it was, he doesn’t think twice about going on a rant in the video about how as he was leaving, he saw the most gorgeous man working out and he may or may not have decided to get some exercise on the machines instead of running away because he wanted to stare at this earthly Adonis for a little while.

 “And that’s the story of how I went to the gym, almost died because I was too socially anxious to tell the instructor the workout was too intense for me, went to hide in the bathroom to catch my breath for 15 minutes, then went to run away without saying goodbye, saw the most beautiful man I’ve ever laid eyes on and felt compelled to man up, go back to tell Leon that it wasn’t working out for me and that I’d like to try the machines so that I could go at my own pace, then embarrassed myself by being the most unfit person in Britain in front of a fitness god with the face of an angel. But hey, I least I got some exercise in! Also, I may be going again just to see if I run into him again. Not to talk to him, or ask him out, I just want to bask in his beauty. What’s the bi equivalent of a useless lesbian? Because that’s me. Oh, I know! A disaster bi. I’m pretty sure I’ve read that somewhere,” he ends with a laugh.

 “That’s not creepy, right? Is that creepy?” he asks PJ later. PJ laughs at him, but reassures him that so long as he’s respectful and doesn’t stalk this guy or something, it’s fine. And really, Phil probably couldn’t be a creep if he tried. He’s too polite, and also too good a person to actually put his own selfish desires above someone else’s comfort.

 Slightly reassured, Phil goes back to the gym again to try his luck. He wasn’t completely serious in his video, he’s not going to keep going to the gym to stare longingly at this guy. He’s hoping to talk to him at some point, feel him out (metaphorically!) to see if he may be interested. He’s not going to just ask him out out of nowhere, but maybe, if he seems like he might be receptive to it…

***

Dan does have a little freakout as he goes back home, but then life goes on, and he doesn’t see Phil again in the gym for the rest of the week. He figures it’s probably a fluke. Phil has mentioned repeatedly in his videos that’s he’s terribly unfit and that he doesn’t enjoy working out at all, though he’s tried a few times to get into the swing of it. That’s probably what happened, he’s tried it again (it isn’t lost on Dan that it’s the middle of January, and Phil has joked that getting fit is always one of his New Year’s resolutions), but he’ll probably get bored soon.

 The big freakout comes four days after, when he gets a notification that Amazingphil has uploaded a video called “Why I should probably not go back to the gym… but will anyway”. He’s glad he waits until he’s home to watch it, because whatever he was expecting (oh god, will he mention the awkward nerd who almost fell off the treadmill when he walked in and kept sneaking looks at him? Shit, did I make him uncomfortable?), it was not this.

 Phil wasn’t even going to try the machines? He was walking past and saw Dan and stayed to stare at him?? He thought Dan was attractive? Very attractive even? He was thinking of coming back to stare at Dan some more?? Was this even real? Was he just building up a story to make an entertaining video? What was going on? Was this real life? Oh god, he actually goes on a minute-long rant about how gorgeous Dan is and he might have to go scream on a pillow, what is his life. Dan had looked in the mirror when he went home after the awkward gym kind-of-encounter that day; he’d finished an hour long session of exercise and he’d looked it. He was tired and sweaty and he’d worn his too big grey exercise t-shirt that day. He’d looked like the exhausted, emo-adjacent, sweaty rat that he was, what was Phil talking about?

 ***

The next time, Phil tries talking to him. Nothing too ambitious, just some small talk.

He takes his chance when the man stops the machine he’s on and steps away, pulling his headphones off and into his backpack.

“Hey, um, hi,” Phil says and gives a little wave. “Sorry to bother you, I just signed in last week and I was wondering if you’ve been coming here for long?”

 The man looks a bit surprised, but not bothered, to Phil’s relief.

 “Oh, hi. Yeah, a bit over a year?” His phone beeps and he looks at it distractedly, but he keeps talking. “Since I moved in to London, really.” He puts his phone back and turns his attention to Phil again. Phil beams at him.

 “Oh, that’s great!” he maybe sounds a bit too excited about that, but he’s a bit nervous and he’s glad the guy is volunteering information and seems to be okay talking to him. “I don’t know much about gyms, or exercise, as you can see,” Phil joked, waving his right arm to encompass himself, illustrating his unfit condition, “so I thought I’d ask someone for… suggestions, I guess? If that’s okay”.

 The man looks surprised again for a second, but then he looks him up and down appreciatively and once he’s made it all the way up to Phil’s eyes again, he declares, “I don’t know that you need any. I think you look great”.

 Phil is startled into a quiet laugh and he can feel the blush on his face, but he can’t be too bothered given the current situation.

 “I’m Dan,” the man smiles at him, and Phil suddenly feels like a deer in the headlights. Oh god, he has dimples. The humanity. He’s actually a thousand times more attractive when he smiles, how? Phil has the urge to do something stupid. He powers through it, but he’s taken a critical hit, and he probably comes off as extremely weird through the rest of the short conversation. Not that he isn’t weird. He’s made a whole series of youtube videos about it. It’s part of his core branding.

 “I’d be happy to give you some tips, or whatever it is you’re looking for,” Dan starts, then his phone beeps again, and he interrupts whatever he was going to say to check it, again, then sighs. “Sorry, I’d love to help you out right now, but I really need to go… deal with this client.” His phone makes another, different sound, and Phil can see Dan isn’t happy about it, but then he shoves the phone away and when he turns to Phil again, he has a small, shy-looking smile on his face. Phil is a goner.

 “If you want... I come here every day from six to seven or so, except Sundays. If you come around that time, I’d be happy to help you?” The words lift into a question, into an invitation that Phil can take or leave.

 Phil recognises that it’s a very open invitation. If he actually wants help and nothing else, Dan would probably indulge him. If Phil was uncomfortable and didn’t want to run into him again, he now knows what time Dan comes and can plan around it to avoid him. And if he wants something else, like, say, misuse his gym membership card to come flirt with a gorgeous guy he met in the machine room…

 Dan is picking up his stuff, conspicuously giving him some breathing room, and Phil realises he might have come off as uninterested, which is the opposite of what he wants to do now that Dan’s flirted with him first, so he smiles and brings out the bedroom eyes.

 “That’d be brilliant. I’ll definitely take you up on that.”

 Phil’s gratified to see Dan looks affected, if the searing look he throws his way is any indication, but after a few seconds, his phone beeps again and he’s moving to leave.

 “Good,” he says, his slightly crooked smile giving Phil ample incentive to stick to his New Year’s resolution for once. “I’ll see you around, then”.

 Now, because Phil is a useless bisexual, it is only at this point that he realises he’s never offered his name, and Dan is turning to leave, so he blurts it out.

 “My name’s Phil, by the way!”

 Dan stops, turns back to him and gives him another one of those devastating smiles, the kind that brings out his dimples, and Phil may be swooning.

 “Phil,” Dan says, less as if he’s trying out the word and more as if he’s relishing in it. “I look forward to seeing you again”. The he turns and actually leaves.

 Phil is left alone in the machine room, staring at the door Dan left through and smiling like a lunatic for the next couple of minutes.

 ***

“Okay, I have a confession to make,” Dan starts before they even open the menus.

 “Okay?”

 “Please don’t take this the wrong way. I just… feel like I need to tell you this if we’re actually going to do this.”

 Okay, now Phil is a little worried, but he’s open to hear Dan out on whatever it is. He really likes Dan an unreasonable amount for how recently they’ve met and how little time they’ve spent together. He’d like to think he’s an open-minded person, and so he quickly decides that he’ll be kind no matter what it is that’s making Dan look this nervous.

 “Okay. I’m listening.” Phil wants to hold Dan’s hand to maybe put him at ease, but he’s not sure if that would help or make things worse, so he refrains.

 “Right. Okay.” Dan takes a deep breath. ”Um. Okay. I… knew your name. That day we talked for the first time. And the time before that, really, when I first saw you in the gym.”

 “Okay?” He doesn’t know what Dan is hinting at.

 “I know who you are, I mean. I’ve known who you are since 2006, when I first became obsessed with Youtube.”

 Oh.

 “Oh.” Phil wasn’t expecting that, but he’s not sure why something like that would make Dan this nervous, so he figures there’s more. When Dan doesn’t elaborate, but rather keeps looking at him in silence, Phil tries to break the ice. “So, you used to watch my videos?”

 Dan relaxes a little as Phil smiles at him. “Yeah. I was a huge fan, actually.” He still looks nervous, so Phil decides to throw caution to the wind and move to hold his hand anyway. When he reaches out and threads their fingers together over the table, Dan gives him a questioning look, but he doesn’t move away. Instead, he moves his thumb to gently rub Phil’s hand, and manages a shaky smile.

 Did he think Phil was going to be upset that Dan liked his videos as a teenager? Or that Phil maybe wouldn’t want to date someone who used to be a viewer? That was crazy. This was actually great, as it meant Dan had to have some idea of what he was getting into, dating a youtuber. It also meant Phil wouldn’t have to explain Youtube to him, or his nosey audience, or why there was a good chance their dates would be interrupted by people asking for a picture with him. The only reason Phil had chosen this restaurant for their first proper date (flirting at the gym didn’t count as proper dates) and had gone for a private room was so that he could get the explanation out of the way before that happened.

 “I don’t mind, if that’s what you’re worried about,” he reassures Dan. “That’s actually really flattering. Though I wonder what I did to lose you as a viewer,” Phil jokes.

 Dan winces and says. “You didn’t.”

 Now Phil’s eyebrows shoot up, but he still doesn’t pull his hand away. It gives Dan the strength he couldn’t seem to gather before.

 “I started watching you early on, and watched you all through college. I used to watch a lot of youtube then. I gradually stopped watching Youtube as a whole when I graduated and got a job, as a result of a mixture of lack of time and waning interest, but there’s a few channels I still check out every once in a while. Yours is among them.”

 Phil squeezes his hand reassuringly, and grins. “Do you follow my social media accounts?”

 “Um. Yeah. Instagram.”

 Phil grinned warmly, “Really? So you like looking at me. Good to know.”

 Dan made an embarrassed little noise of protest, but he couldn’t really argue. “You’re nice to look at.” He was blushing a little, but he was also looking him in the eye now, shy but determined. Phil got distracted by the little rosy patch that formed right over his jaw.

 “Do you follow me on twitter? Or on Tumblr? Do you troll the IDB forums?” Phil is full on teasing him now. It seems highly unlikely that Dan is one of his most invested fans; in fact, the idea is kind of hilarious. And also kind of hot. He might revisit that idea later. In private.

 Dan laughs, “No, and no, and I don’t even know what that last one is, do I want to know?”

 “It’s a fan forum. It’s… very comprehensive. There’s a lot of information and speculation going on there. You know, actual fandom stuff.”

 Dan scoffs at that, but he’s still smiling, so Phil counts it as a win. “I’m not in the fandom. Ha, I wouldn’t have even had the time for it until recently, with the way I let work take over my life. Just… you know. I watch your videos.”

 “And you follow my Insta,” Phil reminded him.

 “Okay, that too.”

 “Is that why you watch my videos? Because you think I’m ‘nice to look at’?” Phil teases.

 “Well, I mean, that certainly helped,” Dan answers candidly, and damn it, now it’s Phil’s turn to blush. “But I wouldn’t have kept watching if you weren’t also hilarious. You’re just fun to watch, you know?”

 Phil is thinking this is all immensely cute when it dawns on him what his next to last video was. “Oh no. Oh no, god, you still watch my videos.” His hand is gripping Dan’s like a lifeline in mortification.

 “Yeah…?”

 “Mfph,” Phil says from behind his other hand. Which he is trying and failing to hide behind. His right hand hasn’t even tried to let go of Dan’s, so Dan doesn’t panic. Mostly.

 “You saw my video, didn’t you? The gym video? Where I go on and on about how fit you are?”

 “Yep;” Dan answered cheekily.

 Phil moaned in embarrassment behind his hand and Dan laughs. It sounds about as beautiful as he is, which is saying a lot. Okay, Phil may be a bit smitten, but he thinks he has reason to be, all things considered.

 “Instant favourite. How do you think I managed to find the guts to flirt with you?”

 At that, Phil peeks out of his hand.

 “I wasn’t sure if you even meant it, but. I mean, I know you must exaggerate or even make up part of your stories to make them entertaining for an audience. But. I mean, you did go on for about two minutes about how gorgeous I was, so,” Dan laughs a bit under his breath and Phil is so charmed he finally pulls his hand away from his face. “I figured I probably had a chance if you ever showed up in the gym again.”

 “I meant it,” Phil tells him. The way Dan is looking at him, joy and affection and attraction (a look that would later be dubbed ‘Heart Eyes Howell’ by Phil’s fans), prompts Phil to admit “...I actually had to reshoot that because I went on quite the lengthy rant about it the first time. And then I had to cut some of it from the take you did see, so that it wouldn’t jar the flow of the video.”

 Phil is blushing again, but Dan looks thrilled, so he doesn’t mind too much.

 ***

 Amazingphil posted “Life Update! Amazing Boyfriend? (Not Clickbait)”

 “Hi guys! So, a lot of people have been asking about this on twitter - *zoom in* and everywhere else *laughs, zoom out* so I thought I’d let you know what’s been going on in my life.

 Yes, I’m dating someone. Yes, it’s a guy. Yes, I’m very happy about it and you all should be grateful I have some self-control because if I had immediately given in to the urge to gush about him, you’d all be sick of it by now. *laughs*

 So, anyway! In this video, I’ll tell you a little about how we met, and I think some of you will be pleasantly surprised to find out that I’ve actually mentioned him before in a past video.

 Remember when I said this? [clip of the gym video where he talks about how his struggles in the gym led him to stumbling upon the Most Beautiful Man In The World.]

 Weeeell… *looks to the side*

 I did go back, as it turns out, and I didn’t see him again. But I was already there, so I might as well do some exercise, right? So I did, and nothing happened, and I came back home tired and sore and slightly disappointed.

 But then! The next time I went, I caught him just as he was finishing his, like, workout day, or whatever it is that people who exercise regularly call it, and I thought to myself, ‘Phil. This is your chance. Just talk to him. Make some small talk. No pressure, just some casual human interaction. Just a chill talk with the most attractive man you’ve ever seen in your life. Nothing to be nervous about! *laughs, closes his eyes and shakes his head at himself*

 So, I give myself a little pep talk, I pluck up my courage, and I. Go. Talk to him! *celebratory music*

 And what does he do? *Phil enunciates, giggly* What does he do as I start talking to him, just trying to set up a friendly, relaxed atmosphere? Just opening up the lines of communication, you know, some casual bants? Do you know what he does? He immediately, shamelessly, flirts with me. *Phil laughs again*

 I was… shook.

 So, we talked a little but then he had to go - which I was actually grateful for because by that time I was freaking out internally and I didn’t want to make a complete fool of myself - but! We arranged to meet again, in the gym.

 And the next time we did meet, I asked him out. On an actual date, not just… hanging out in the gym so that I had to awkwardly try not to embarrass myself as I work out in front of him even though I’m terrible at it.

 So, long story short, we’ve been dating since then. *celebratory music*

 So now you know. I am officially dating the Most Beautiful Man In The World.

*soft background music stops* Not even kidding, he’s the most attractive person I’ve seen in my life. It’s kind of surreal.

 *music resumes*

 So! I know some of you guys have been asking to meet him, as it were, and I have good news for you! I will be making a video with him soon, probably in the next week, so look out for that! Also, *zoom in* be nice to him, please, he’s wonderful and I’m really happy he’s in my life. Let’s not drive him away, yeah! *laughs*

 *zooms out* I’m kidding! He knows you’re all crazy, I told him all about you guys. And he seems ready to adopt you all anyway, so that’s alright. The poor bastard. 

 Anyway, that’s it for today! I hope you all have a great day! Please press like if you liked the video, I actually want to know if you guys enjoy this type of casual life update... talk-type thing and if I should make more of these. Click the subscribe button if you want to see more of me, and click the notification bell to be told when I post a new video! Check out my gaming channel! And I’ll see you guys soon! Byeee!”

[seenashwrite]

Nash Watches & Rates Cheesy Hallmark & Lifetime Winter Movies So You Don’t Have To

(a.k.a. -  Nash Records Her Viewings Of Hallmark & Lifetime Winter Movies, which are fanfic in visual form & are gold. And yes, it’s a apparently a legit sub-genre. Best I can tell, if it’s not Christmas or Valentines, and there’s snow, then it goes. Spoilers abound.)

ETA: This adventure is now moving to @seenashblog, so my SPN peeps can rest assured they’ll not be exposed to this any longer - I have a feeling I’ll not be done purging my soul for awhile yet #bless my heart

As per last time during the Christmas round-ups, 4 and 5 stars mean the best of the lot, 3 stars means it’s not necessarily a waste of your time, 2 stars is up to your discretion, and 1 star means it is time you will never get back.

Here we go.

Winter Castle (people you've never heard of - Hallmark)

Holy shit, cliché on parade and nobody can act?! Jack-friggin'-pot. Zero chemistry amongst anyone, from family to friendship to romance?! Hot damn.

So they're all at this place for a destination wedding (a.k.a, Selfish And Life-Disrupting And Huge Expense For Guests Thing And Oh Here’s Our Registry Too, come at me brah), and everyone is staying in a hotel. HA! KIDDING! They're all in this giant faux igloo, and by "faux" I mean there are these church-esque doors in what is, I guess, a specially-flown-in iceberg on land. Google tells me it’s an actual place. 

Anyway, through the doors you'll find hallways (that have people carved into them, not creepy at all) which are lined with rooms. Suites? I never saw a bathroom door, doesn't damn matter, nobody poos in Hallmark's world. Oh, also, for lighting, we have Target pillar candles, then everything's backlit in '80s neon:

Are they shitting me?

But that's beside the point. Point is, it may be pretty to look at but in execution, it's stupid. No way people haven’t had to peace out and find a new joint to stay in because of near or actual hypothermia. Based on the warm, cozy, wood-floored, windowed, staircase-and-balcony-having rehearsal dinner area in a large building with stone wall exterior, this hotel actually has some, y'know, hotel to it. Lodge? Who cares, but I bring it up because of the standard precocious child who is there to bring everybody together whilst turning into a popsicle.

The poor kid is bundled within an inch of her life, dumb bunny-eared toboggan to puffy jacket, and is burrito'd in a sleeping bag, with a quilt on this bed that looks to be carved out of ice, as well, and I say "as well" because our leading lady is shown frequently perched on what looks to be a chair carved out of ice (fur puffy thing for ass protection) with her laptop on a table carved out of ice when she's face-timing her Not Gay Male Best Friend in a bow-tie and sweater vest back home, and - bonus! - he doubles as The One Person Of Color. Now, if memory serves, legit igloos made by actual First Nation(s) folks (meaning both Canadian and American - specifically, Alaskan - and probs any groups that found themselves in the way-way-North in the way-back-when and had to come up with this genius or, you know, die) are actually pretty damn warm once the fire gets cranking. Not to say you don't keep some fierce socks and gloves on, that's plain smart, but enclosed space with heat is enclosed space with heat - just don't lick the walls. That's good advice, igloo or otherwise. 

On that topic, via the article linked above, says one of the actresses:

"It's like an igloo," Mullen told the Standard. "The further you go into the hotel, it gets colder and colder. As you walk down the hallway into the different rooms, it's just getting into your bones." She said every time they called "Cut!," everyone would put on jackets to warm up. 

She’s incorrect - that’s not like an igloo. It’s too big, that’s why it doesn’t stay warm. I have *zero* desire to go to this place. That sounds like Dante’s Frosty The Snowman circle of hell. I digress.

I say all that to say, this movie is straight dumb because the script is basic bitch, they were leaning on the location and hard. It gets a star because they tried in the sense that they did use a unique setting, but the rest was neglected (the story and the casting). Everything else was so blaaaaaand, and the acting was so stilted and unnatural, and they cast the mother with someone who looks the exact same age as the lead gal/her sister (the bride), and then there’s this one chick character who was so pathetically desperate, and the leading man was such a pussy who wouldn't make a fucking decision, and they had our leading lady be all *sniffle* and tolerating that shit AND SHE JUST MET HIM BY THE WAY, and I just.... ugh.

1/5 stars

.

Royal Matchmaker (Bethany Joy Lenz - Hallmark)

This isn't an "official" Winter '19 jam, google tells me it's from the '18 spring movies, but everybody's bundled up, so I'm calling bullshit. It ain't half-bad, despite the fact that it's a “royal” one, who’d-a-thunk? There was one over Christmas that got a 4 (see link up top), and I never would’ve predicted it. But that was an oldie-goldie, this is now. This one has the traditional royal romance beats and, no shit, the sidekick is the same one from another "royal", the absolutely horrid "Christmas At The Palace”, from Christmas ‘18. I cannot reiterate how bad that movie was - not "My Christmas Love" bad, but bad.

All right, so - she’s a matchmaker from NYC, which is at least a new take on what's coming next - and you guessed it, a prince HAS to get married or some reason, even though it's mentioned they are under a Parliamentary system and not a monarchy, but he still has to because it's the 17th century, oh wait no it’s not. The king, who is from a random made-up locale (*sigh*) has hired her (and said partner) to find a suitable wife for his son, who’s presented as the typical eligible rich bachelor, and “presented as” is the key phrase. It’s one of the things I like about this plot, but it doesn't outweigh the bleeeccchhh.

For one, it wears me out, the making-up of countries. It’s distracting. If you’re gonna do royalty, the right move is to have the royal not be a king/prince but make it a duke/duchess jam, refer to the locale vaguely as a duchy in England or Ireland or Scotland or Sweden or Norway or whatever Americans will fall for, 'cause as a rule, Americans aren't typically hip to other countries' jams. Hell, say someone is a prince/princess, but it’s more in inherited title only - that’s what the 4 from the Christmas list did right. Nobody called him “Prince Whatever”, he wasn’t presented as this hot commodity, it was a nothing burger, we didn’t even find out that he had the title til near the end of the movie. I’ve digressed, back to this flick.

I detest the royal garb they’ve got lead dude in at the conclusion, it looks like you or I waltzed into Party City and slapped down $30 and walked back to the set. It’s ill-tailored and in too-bright colors and is, again, something utterly distracting that could've been avoided, and same with the king’s, too-small jacket to too-long length of slacks. All the women, including our main gal, are in prom dresses straight off the rack from Sears and J.C. Penney’s. This is not praise. The men are all in identical rented tuxedos with clip bow-ties. Thanks, I hate it.

I mean, and I hate that there’s a ball at the end at all, but it goes hand-in-hand with the core premise, which is that they’re on a tight schedule - ol’ Bethany has 4 weeks. They, of course, fall in love with one another, and props to casting because these two look good together and have decent chemistry, but that could be because Lenz knocks these movies out of the park - this is the third... maybe the fourth... that I’ve seen with her - she elevates everything she’s in. When I mentioned her to a friend, I was told she also elevated some shitty TV show that I never watched, so perhaps you are already familiar with her.

Anyhow, once again there’s too much filler and the ending draaaaaaags and then BOOM it’s done in the last three minutes, which is standard for these movies (both Lifetime and Hallmark), I’d say, about 95% of the time. The story was good in that the prince wasn’t a typical playboy and he kept his philanthropic side a secret because he didn’t want press invading these small villages and whatever he was helping rebuild - he genuinely likes getting his hands dirty and he actually knows how to do shit, he fixes a radiator at a community center at one point. Eh. I dunno. It had such potential in the front half, then just shit the bed in the back half, so it was half of a waste of my time. But you may dig it. It's far from the worst of Hallmark's offerings but, again, I think it's because of Lenz, she's the only thing getting it up from a 1/5.

2/5 stars

.

Oh… oh mah… what the... we interrupt the winter fare for what looks like a rando that’s snuck in and christ on a cracker, no. No. No. NO. The summary:

A woman begins an online relationship with a famous photographer, not realizing that she is actually communicating with the man’s young son.

This caught my ear because as I was sitting here writing up the last movie, it came on, and I hear this woman’s voice, her typing (so it’s her voice in her mind), then a man’s voice (as she’s reading), and I looked up when the man’s voice started switching to a kid’s (boy’s) voice back and forth every sentence or so - and then I looked at that summary, and….

NO

"Chance at Romance", it's called –> 0/5 stars, I don’t even need to watch it, what a stupid garbage fucking premise, and it’s gross, and I hope that shit kid gets punished, like as in, no computer til he's old enough to own his own home and pay for his own internet, because scumbag kid. If he has the balls to pull this catfishing shitstorm on a fucking adult and gets away with it, what the fuck will he do to manipulate girls his own age? Gross. IT’S A GROSS PREMISE YOU GREETING CARD FUCKTARDS

.

Love On Ice (Andrew Walker, who's in every fourth movie, and  the lead chick's familiar her name is Julie Berman - Hallmark)

Former pro skater, now teaching - don't worry, it's not the aforementioned “Christmas At The Palace”, despite the similar M.O. - and decides to go for one last run at regionals because the new coach in town who's teaching the next big thing is like "You used to be the next big thing, why don't you undo eight years of not training aggressively in, like, a couple weeks and compete against the girl I've been hired to make a winner, and I'll coach you both, because I have a boner for you and your shitty blonde extensions! No, that's not what he says, but that's the deal, yo. The next-big-thing's got an overbearing mother and, once his boner gets found out, here comes a new coach that used to be the former-next-big-thing's coach, and she's a horrible actress, she can't play sneaky-evil to save her life. I liked the two leads, and they did a better job than the other ice skating scenes/movies with concealing the real skater actors, but overall this was as boring as watching paint dry, I just wanted it to be over.

1/5 stars

.

The Perfect Catch (Nikki DeLoach and... shock of all shocks, no not really... our old buddy, Andrew Walker - Hallmark)

I swear, I don't know if Andrew Walker is on some mission from god, or being punished by him. I'm in the same boat, so I empathize. At least I'm not contracted. I can't speak for him, but I remain happy for DHJ, that he's escaped this purgatory, and is safe on the shore... at least, at present.

In any event, this one doesn't seem like a "Winter official", but there were jackets and no definite spring or fall standards (pastels or orange leaves), and it's airing now, so here we are. It seems to be baseball season, so I know they mean for it to be spring, but they are wearing coat-coats, not it's-still-kinda-chilly light jackets. I don't fucking care, I watched it, so I’m reporting on it.

It ticks many boxes on the Winter Fanfic Bingo card (forthcoming), specifically the ones that are carryovers from Christmas and will be carried over to all the Hallmark/Lifetime movies regardless of time of year. Because being formulaic, when playing the long game, is cheap and efficient, and in the restaurant business, or products made on a factory line, or in healthcare standards, things of that ilk, you want streamlined coupled with the trieds-and-trues. In writing? Not-so-much. It's lazy.

And speaking of restaurants, that's the first box that got ticked - our leading lady owns a restaurant and, next box, it's in danger of being lost. Other boxes include: our leading man is famous; he's the character that comes back home, leaves/might leave, then changes mine/comes back, and it's to stay!; adorable child who ideally will bring everyone together; a character's parents are dead. Blah-blah. Blah-blah-blah. Blah-blaaaaah-blah-bleh. <---- that had more variety than this flick. I mean, there's nothing wrong with this movie. It's vanilla. It's white bread. It's mashed potatoes with no salt or a touch of sour cream mixed in, no loading with shredded sharp cheese and crumbled brown sugar-and-cracked-pepper bacon and the barest touch of chives. I'm hungry, shut up.

It doesn't just get 1 star because it's not bottom barrel - everyone's competent in their acting, there's nothing outlandishly stupid about the script, it's not shellacked in Velveeta. I will say that they pull a little teensy, micro-twist with how they resolve his balancing a primo offer that in no way should he pass on career-wise fairly realistically. The very last scene is, of course, stupid and embarrassing.

2/5 stars

The next movie has palm trees, so officially not Winter. But oof.... it's got Kelly Rutherford and Cameron Mathison, both of whom are ringers. Hmmm. Yeah, I still ain’t subjecting myself to more than needed for this adventure. Oh, and they continue to play the basic-basic-BAAAAASIC-boring "Hope At Christmas" on Hallmark Movies and Mysteries", if you’re interested. It is a mystery to me as to why they continue to do so. Anyhow, there's apparently 3 or 4 more brand spanking new offerings from Hallmark for the next several weeks. 

More to come. I’ll reblog this with every new entry added to the top, so you can always just keep this post URL bookmarked if you think you missed it. Tell me if you want to be tagged.