#availabilty

[birthdaykings]

Fruit Of Forest Cake @ ₹1,099.00. . . Book Now By Clicking The Link :- https://www.birthdaykings.com/product/fruit-of-forest-cake/

[shevr]

puttin my snacks in there to slow down my intake

[ornstein]

Everytime I count how many European countries I've been in I always forget mentioning Andorra 🫠

[bellaroles]

Choosing the next danmei to read based on..

☺️ the translators

✨ the authors

❌ the cover arts

🥲/😆 the reviews

[libberkib]

European Starling Gouache and Ballpoint Pen on 10 inch Wood Panel Painting no. 7 in the "In Bloom" series, availabilty TBA

Print Shop | Commissions | Tip/Donate

[lifeseriesincorrectquotes]

Joel: Etho, you know how much I love you… 

Etho: Whaddya want? 

Joel: A partner with some GODDAMN EMOTIONAL AVAILABILTY!

[draco-glacialis]

Rio: Agatha, you know how much I love you…

Agatha: Whaddya want?

Rio: A partner with some GODDAMN EMOTIONAL AVAILABILTY!

Agatha: I’m afraid my mother beat all the emotional availability out of me when I was a child.

Rio: … -_-

Rio: I’m going to put that woman in a toaster then smash it to bits. Then I’m going to drag her down to the deepest, darkest pit of Hell and request they give her the worst punishment x100.

[mamaspidershit]

Peter: Natasha, you know how much I love you… Natasha: Whaddya want? Peter: A friend with some GODDAMN EMOTIONAL AVAILABILTY!

[aludraslytherin]

Sirius: Remus, you know how much I love you… Remus: Whaddya want? Sirius: A partner with some GODDAMN EMOTIONAL AVAILABILTY!

[starsforbuckley]

INCORRECT 9-1-1 QUOTE

----

Buck: Tommy, you know how much I love you…

Tommy: Whaddya want?

Buck: A partner with some GODDAMN EMOTIONAL AVAILABILTY!

----

• fandom: 9-1-1

[eslypyiris]

°❈°Hazbin Gods AU Incorrect quotes°❈°

Lucifer: *About to cry* I miss my wife, Alastor.

Alastor: Well, I miss my clown and I'm not acting like a baby

═══════ ≪ °❈° ≫ ═══════

Alastor: When I first met you, I thought you were weird and annoying.

Vox: And?

Alastor: And you are.

═══════ ≪ °❈° ≫ ═══════

Vox: Are we fighting or flirting?

Alastor: I'm pinning you against a wall with my hand around your neck-

Vox: Your point?

═══════ ≪ °❈° ≫ ═══════

Vaggie: Can you recommend a book that'll make me cry?

Charlie: General Mathematics 8th Grade Edition.

═══════ ≪ °❈° ≫ ═══════

Angel Dust : Husk, you know how much I love you…

Husk: Whaddya want?

Angel Dust : A partner with some GODDAMN EMOTIONAL AVAILABILTY!

═══════ ≪ °❈° ≫ ═══════

Carmilla: Do you know why I called you in here?

Zestial: Because I accidentally ate your cat again?

Carmilla: *Starts pouring two glasses of wine.* Exactly.

═══════ ≪ °❈° ≫ ═══════

Sir Pentious: Crushes are the worst. Whenever I’m near mine, I start acting stupid.

Cherri: You always act stupid.

Cherri: ...

Cherri: Wait...

═══════ ≪ °❈° ≫ ═══════

Alastor: *Singing* He's making a list, checking it twice, gonna find out who's on thin fucking ice

Niffty: *Also singing* Santa Claus is calling you out!

═══════ ≪ °❈° ≫ ═══════

Rosie: *Watching Alastor manipulate Charlie to get Vox back* I'm a nice person, but I'm about to start throwing rocks at people.

═══════ ≪ °❈° ≫ ═══════

Emily: *Watching Sera singing in front of the fireplace like Frollo*

Emily: ...

Emily: I think it's time to book a therapy session.

[malottie]

after hinting in a conversation where polearms came up that i had a personnal ranking and obtaining no response, i've come to tumblr. tumblr has my back.

weapon side of tumblr; here we go

#5! : the Naginata

a very cool and classy weapon, however it looses point for being a 1-edged blade. not even 2 edges? not the best thrusting power either. slashing isn't great against armor, and though it can kill in a hit against bare skin, maybe even gambisons, it struggles against the most basic of chainmail. pierce and blunt superiority

contenders for 5th place were also the guan dao, the chinese version with sharp bits on the opposite edge, which should net it more offensive points but they make the weapon look less neat, and they barely add any functionnality

we also have the warscythe, inward-curving and lower-class cousin of these bad boys - a simple grass scythe with the blade turned for increased range, balance, slashing power and ease of use. while the wide availabilty and humble origins are great, i simply am not a fan of the design. notable though, for an improvised weapon, a farming tool, it works well, and is deadlier than it might look

#4! : the Partisan

a fairly straightforward polearm, barely upgraded from the base that is the spear/pike, with upward hooks on the sides to catch and deflect swords. perticularly good in defense, and just a neat shape

#3! : the Guisarme

often called Billhook because it's basically a billhook stuck on a spear, the guisarme is of this category of polearms i love called "more is better". to hit someone with that and not hurt them, you'd have to really try to. spikes everywhere isn't the cleverest design, but it's effective. the backwards-curving hook would have been used to dismount cavaliers off of horseback, although i like it best for the prospect of hooking on and pulling other weapons while clashing to try and disarm your opponent. notably though, said backwards hook makes for the perfect spot to be hooked and pulled on

#2! : the Halberd

yes, the classic, THE polearm, our beloved halberd. also a partisan of "more is better" (of which the Partisan is not) with its "axehead" and big spike, the halberd is more interesting than what its popularity might posit: as seen above, 'Halberd' describes a wider range of weapons than most terms. with or without a backspike, from a normal thrusting head spike to some of the longest ever seen on a weapon, from an almost Foulge aka a warcleaver, to basically a battleaxe on a stick, the halberd is an ol' reliable and has what you need, whatever it is. probably

#Honorable mentions!

i already mentionned the guan dao and warscythe, who didn't make it into the top 5, but how could i forget the most basic of polearms, forefather of our forefathers and original pokey stick;

apparently, whether it is named spear, lance or pike depends on its size and use. spear are for footsoldiers and can even be thrown like javelins in some circumstances, seeing how they're the lightest. lances are for horseback, while pikes, the longest, are used in tight formations to form a barrage of spikes, like against cavalry

finally, the closest thing to our top 1: the Lucerne hammer

used mainly for its hammerhead, the Lucerne is, for this reason and because of its less fancy, less french name, always in the shadow of my favorite polearm:

the Bec de Corbin

from the old french for "crow's beak", our beautiful corvid inspired weapon is used primarly with its sidespike, our namesake beak. an armor destroyer and danger from all sides, the bec de corbin can pierce and crush, with a thrust as deadly as its swipe. hack away at your foes in perfect serenity with the knowledge that a concussion and three broken bones is about the most unscathed you can get out of a confrontation with a bec de corbin. smash their helmet in with blunt force or pierce their chestplate with this XL warpick, the choice is yours. however, be mindfull of this heavy duty weapon, as its weight and force can be used against you, even moreso than with other polearms, with the thrusting spike the only part that remains deadly at close range

and that concludes this! please don't come for me. i am simply a weapons enthusiast and do not deserve to die for any mistakes, omissions or personnal opinions you don't agree with present in this post. please

[lifea16]

MORE OF THESE (I'm using text this time so I can chose who's who rather than shuffling indefinitely)

Blitz: If I die, you can have what little I own. Stolas: Wait. What do you mean "if" you die? Blitz: My unending existence is fuelled by pure spite, that of which the painful experiences of life have rendered me full. Stolas: Stolas: Sighs Let me call your therapist again.

--------------- *When Fizz and Blitz were kidnapped by Crimson* Fizz: We need to distract these guys. Blitz: Leave it to me. Blitz: Centaurs have six limbs and are therefore insects. Discuss. Everyone else in the mafia: immediately begin arguing

---------------- Millie, taping a knife onto a Roomba: Be free, my child. Moxxie, entering the room with a small cut on their ankle: Who the f-

----------------- Blitz: What can therapy do for me that screaming in my car for 30 minutes can’t?

---------------- Stolas: Blitz, you know how much I love you… Blitz: Whaddya want? Stolas: A partner with some GODDAMN EMOTIONAL AVAILABILTY!

[polinomnom]

A Kusahigu commission piece i made for @AloofAntagonist ♥️

I cannot tell you how happy i am that i get to make commissions of the things i love.

((I managed to post an earlier version on X, congrats me))

My commissions are still open, dm for availabilty and details ✨

[libberkib]

Bluejay Gouache and Ballpoint Pen on 12 inch Wood Panel Painting no. 8 in the "In Bloom" series, availabilty TBA

Print Shop | Commissions | Tip/Donate