#autistic mc close to meltdown

[mystic-headcanons]

you, that one anon and I, are single handedly CARRYING the autistic Jumin headcanon.

If it's alright, what would happen if MC were to help Jumin through a meltdown and/or shutdown? Or her just telling Jumin that it's okay to be him, and that they can find out who he is behind the mask together :,]?

Man this makes me wanna *hits desk repeatedly*

FR THO i love my autistic king <3 i'm sorry for the delay! i've had a very. very. eventful couple of weeks T_T

letting himself feel his emotions was something jumin was still getting used to. before her, he always imagined his feelings as something to be locked away, never to be touched and opened. a pandora's box. there was a wall between himself and his emotions, and it was better for everyone that way. of course, he was only human, and sometimes his strongest emotions would slip through. sadness would creep its way out of the box every so often, catching him in her cruel grip. there was always affection whenever he spent time with elizabeth the third, but other than that, jumin never really let himself feel anything. he had always believed that emotions were a waste of time-- that it didn't matter what he felt, because people treated him the same no matter what. no one ever cared for his emotional needs, so why would he? of course, that all changed when he met her and fell in love for the first time. she was able to get him out of his own head, was able to slowly untangle the mess that was jumin han; while he seemed cold and aloof on the outside, he had been drowning under the surface. she had been his lifeline.

she opened his eyes to so much more than emotions, though. it was her that persuaded him to get an autism diagnosis, her that stuck by his side through the assessment and the waiting, and then the confirmation. the confirmation was both a relief and an anxiety- jumin was relieved to hear that there was a reason for the way that he was, and that he wasn't just some broken mess. anxiety had quickly overpowered the relief he felt, though, because...well, powerful people weren't autistic. in his high society, there was not a single person like that. while jumin was sure a lot of them had mental illnesses, it was something taboo among the elites. something that was spoken of behind closed doors and cupped hands, in whispers while you were passing by and words with double meanings. after the diagnosis, jumin began learning about autism- both through research and through firsthand experiences. something he had to learn firsthand was shutdowns and meltdowns.

there were different types, she had explained, and it's not always a visibly emotional breakdown. sometimes it's just completely shutting down, your body present but your mind somewhere far away where no one could reach. it's your senses becoming overwhelmed to the point where your conscious mind decides to take a step back. jumin didn't understand how that could happen until he had experienced it.

it had been a long, stressful day. there were stacks of paper to be signed, crowds of important businessmen and women to be met with, and an important client backed out of a deal at the last minute and left them all scrambling. jumin's entire routine had been thrown off, and he had to meet with his father and his father's new girlfriend; she was worse than the others, had come onto him when his father wasn't in the room and invaded his personal space. by the time jumin got home, he was barely holding himself together. he breezed by his cat and his wife without a word and made his way into the bedroom where he threw himself down onto the bed and stared blankly up at the ceiling. the longer he laid there, the more detached he became from reality until jumin was unseeing and unblinking. this comatose-like state was how she found him, and she was quiet and gentle when she shut the door behind her. not that it really mattered, because she was certain that the penthouse could burn down and jumin would still be none the wiser.

she sat next to him on the bed and repeatedly carded her fingers through his hair, content to do so until he came back to reality. it took a little while, but she could see the light slowly come back to his eyes. saw how he finally started to notice his surroundings, and then notice her. "when did you come in?" he asked, voice a little rough. "mmm about half an hour ago." she responded, stopping her motions in favor of leaning down to press a kiss to his forehead. "rough day?" she asked, and made a sympathetic noise when he nodded. "overwhelming." he said, letting out a sigh as he closed his eyes. "i'm sorry i went all..spacey like that."

"hey, don't apologize." she frowned, lightly tapping his forehead. "this kind of thing happens sometimes. do you want me to make an appointment with a therapist or anything?" that was a new thing, too. therapy. jumin still wasn't entirely comfortable with it, but he couldn't deny that it did help. learning more about his diagnosis and his feelings and how he felt things made it feel less lonely. like, he wasn't the only one who was messed up. jumin was about to deny her offer, but caught himself. it would always be hard to let other people in, to let them see all the mangled, messed up parts that made him, but he was trying.

there was a fear that jumin had of letting other people know of his diagnosis. other than the repercussions in his society, he feared that people would look at him and label him as autistic. like they wouldn't be able to see any other part of him. it was also the reason why he felt like he never really knew himself; he never knew where his mask ended and where he began, always too afraid to find out. he voiced this fear to her, and fell silent as she contemplated her response for a moment. "i think...the people who love you won't look at you and see your diagnosis, but rather look at it like one more piece to the puzzle. like something to help them understand you better." she said, her voice slow and clear. "as for who you are...well, i can sit here and tell you exactly who i think you are without your mask, but it's more important for you to figure that out...and i'll be right here by your side, of course." her words helped to quell the rising anxiety, and he couldn't be more grateful that someone so thoughtful and so calming was by his side. "thank you." he murmured, pressing a kiss to the side of her head. "i will....give the therapist a call myself. in a little while, though. i want to stay here with you for a moment."

[whatisreggieshortfor]

My Brother’s Keeper

Rohan x MC

Foster just wants to care for her autistic brother. Her parents are so sure she needs them to set her up to find someone that will love her that way. Too bad they don’t understand her or her brother.

@justtuesdays @csmicletters @rebelrayne

I hope I did this justice 😭

Foster had been described a lot of ways by people in her life.

Her mates described her as protective, softhearted, witty, sharp tongued. She was who they turned to when they needed someone to listen.

Her parents called her hardworking, social, driven, compassionate. She was who they turned to when they needed help.

Her exes complained she was closed off, too narrow focused, stubborn, a type A personality. They would say she never let herself rely on them.

Her exes and her parents had one thought in common- they believed she used her little brother as an excuse, a shield to keep away intimacy and vulnerability, a way to keep people- and romantic prospects- from getting too close.

Her mates had a different line of thinking. They believed that Stevie was more Foster’s final test for a companion. Not out of a place of malice, or even awareness. None of them thought Foster had any idea she did it, but if someone wanted to be in her life and they thought Stevie was a problem or obstacle in the way, then they were never around long enough to matter.

Because Stevie is autistic.

He had needs special to him that had to be met, and Foster was never nervous or agitated about meeting those needs. Their parents tried, they really did. But she was twelve when he was born and sort of just became his person. Like he was a baby duck and imprinted on her. When she was old enough and got a job that required her to relocate, her parents couldn’t handle the meltdowns he’d have not seeing her every day. So she offered, filed the paperwork when they agreed, and became his guardian.

Foster’s mates had been taken aback when they had visited her flat and her younger brother was suddenly taking up residence in the second bedroom, but her best mate wasn’t. Rohan had been the only one she told before the paperwork was filed, and he had volunteered to assist in moving Stevie’s belongings. None of them were bothered, they had met Stevie several times and adored him. Even when he struggled, they were understanding. Her mates understood that she was his lifeline, the only other person he was ever comfortable around was Rohan- they joked it was the hazard of knowing Foster as long as he had.

Their parents would visit, video call, phone them- they tried to make sure Stevie knew that he was still their son, whether they understood him or not. For him it was just part of the routine Foster helped him establish.

But their mum and dad were also convinced that she would never end up married if Stevie always depended on her- they didn’t pay attention to the fact that she didn’t care what they wanted for her. Convinced it was the only way she’d end up happy, her parents decided they needed to set her up. And what better place than their cousin’s wedding? He was a good man, marrying a well-to-do woman. They were sure that her friend would be perfect.

Foster hadn’t wanted to go. Not only did Stevie have trouble with traveling, but she didn’t care for their cousin.

Or more specifically, she didn’t care for his bride.

Lucas was a gentleman through and through, he never pressured her or got annoyed for choosing to care for Stevie and take his comfort into account rather than to go out and have fun. But his bride-to-be had always made it known that she didn’t care for children, especially those that could misbehave. Foster’s parents never saw an issue with her, only seeing her at family events where she had her best face on, but Hope never went near anyone under fifteen.

Where Lucas never flinched at hearing or seeing Stevie stim, Foster had seen his fiancé glare silently in her seat. She wasn’t sure what the woman would do if he couldn’t stay quiet during the big day. Regardless of her parents wishes, she was going to stay home. Lucas and Rohan had convinced her that it would be okay, Lucas would help her where he could, and Rohan would take care of things at home for them.

So she prepared. Stevie’s headphones were put in his bag, the spare set put in hers. Stevie rechecked the bags she packed three times, once each day leading to their departure. Foster watched as he did his best to remain calm as they started the drive, they had gone over everything they needed to know, and Rohan was taking care of the plants Stevie cared for every day.

Waking up at the hotel Lucas had booked for them, Foster sighed to herself. Stevie didn’t like new places- he had thrown the pillowcase off his pillow, he didn’t like the way it felt. His bag was emptied, his things set in the closest relative places they would be at home. But he was awake, he wasn’t unhappy, and he let her help him prepare for the wedding.

They sat near the back though they were early, she knew he didn’t appreciate crowds, and she would much rather be at home with Rohan than to watch her stuffy aunt and uncle parade her cousin around, but she didn’t get a choice. Nearly as soon as they sat down, a man occupied the seat next to her, essentially ignoring the large number of empty seats. “You must be Foster.”

She blinked, glad he at least chose to sit on her side away from her brother, but confused how he knew her name, “I am. If you’re looking for Lucas-“

“No,” the man grinned, he almost looked like it was the most natural thing in the world for him to do, but it was obviously strained after a moment when she didn’t seem to recognize him through his posturing, “I’m Reese. Your mum wanted us to meet.”

She cringed internally, remembering how her parents demanded she give him a better chance than she had her exes. They kept emphasizing she couldn’t stay single forever. If only they knew, “Right. Good to meet you.” As more people filled the room, she became more aware of Stevie shifting uncomfortably next to her, so she directed her attention to him. Ensuring his noise cancelling headphones were in place, she turned back but Reese was gone. She couldn’t dwell on it as the wedding began, she had to focus to keep him calm.

But the room was crowded.

Stevie’s clothes made him itchy.

The seven or eight year old girl of the couple next to him kept trying to take his comfort toy- a stuffed triceratops Foster had bought him as a toddler.

She tried to calm him down, muttering lowly as to not disturb the others in attendance as she helped him count out the windows, focus on the patterns he could observe as he usually did to relax-

But then the girl finally slipped his toy from his hands, and Stevie had let out an instinctual yell as it slid from his grasp.

Foster didn’t think twice, snatching the dinosaur back and letting him tug it into his chest, eyes narrowed when the couple tried to glare her way at the disturbance.

The minister had halted his speech, all eyes in the room shifting to look at the two of them and she wished they would stop. Stevie hated having eyes on him. Lucas, bless her cousin, cleared his throat and insisted that they continue, but his bride had other plans.

“Not until that’s over.” Hope snapped, sneering at the groom, “I told you I wasn’t a fan of kids attending fancy things, they don’t care.”

Lucas pulled back like she’d slapped him, repulsion clear on his face, “Stevie is doing his best.”

“Sure, whatever.” She pursed her lips, “You promised me this would go off without a hitch, it was the only reason I let you invite them.”

Several of the guests were still turning to look at Foster as Stevie began to rock in his seat, she finally got him to look at her, “Want to go outside? We can watch the clouds.”

He didn’t nod exactly, but he jumped to his feet with his toy still clutched to his chest, and she followed him out, shooting Lucas an apologetic look as they went.

She hadn’t been sure how the rest of the ceremony went, finding a field for Stevie to lie in with a clear view of the fluff drifting over their heads. Eventually people started drifting out of the church, some glaring at them as they went, but some seemed to be shooting grateful looks their way. She noticed the former must’ve been from Hope’s side, while the latter she recognized from Lucas’s side. Their parents emerged eventually, both nearly red faced as they started to stomp their way over, but Lucas flew past them and scooped Foster into a hug, “Bloody hell, thank you so much.”

She blinked, entirely unsure what she was being thanked for, “For interrupting your wedding?”

“For giving me the reason to cancel my wedding.”

“I’m sorry- what??” Her eyes widened, disbelief flooding her features as he smiled far too largely for the news he shared.

Lucas just shook his head, “You know I don’t want kids, neither does Hope, and I thought that was a good sign for us. But she actually just can’t stand to be around children- especially any like Stevie, and I love the little guy too much to marry someone that talks about him the way she was.”

She nodded, still not understanding exactly what happened, “So what now?”

Lucas shrugged, “Reception is still paid for. We go have a drink and dance- I’ve got a room set up for Stevie in the hall we rented. Standard things he likes- food specified for him, those history channel shows on the Telly he loves on dvd.”

Foster had just finished listening to a forty five minute ramble on the intricacies or pro wrestling when she felt a tug on her sleeve, turning to see Stevie, “Every day at three o clock.”

“What?” Reese cocked his head, somehow looking annoyed that someone was stealing his limelight, “What does he mean every day at three o clock?”

She shushed the man beside her, redirecting all her attention to her younger brother, “Were you supposed to do something today at three?”

“Every day at three o clock.” The boy fidgeted, glancing around like he was looking for something, “Every day at three o clock! It’s nearly three- I’m gonna be late!”

“I understand.” She offered firmly, but softly, understanding without the strength to scare him, “I know you don’t like questions, but you need to help me understand what happens every day at three o clock.” She had schedule memorized, but Lucas had talked her into a drink, and then she needed two or three more to deal with Reese’s non stop ego talk.

“Cat. Every day at three o clock. I need to feed the cat- the cat is always there! I need to feed the cat.”

She smiled, hands hovering in front of her to show she wouldn’t touch him, before she gave him a gentle reminder, “Someone is feeding the cat, remember? We wouldn’t let that poor stray starve just because you aren’t home.” Pulling out her phone, she realized the time was two fifty eight as she opened a video call, the flat they shared immediately coming into view, “Hey, Rohan! You know what time it is, right?”

The dark haired man’s beaming smile didn’t fade as he laughed at the check up call, “I am opening the cat food right this second,” he flipped the camera to show the can opener latched onto a half opened can of wet cat food, a familiar dish sitting next to it, “I have the bowl Stevie bought for him, I’m going to put it exactly two feet away from the wall centered behind the rubbish bin under the fire escape. Stevie, you are welcome to stay on the call and watch it happen.” He didn’t ask if he wanted to watch the simple action of a cat being fed. He gave him the option, open ended, and left it up to Stevie to decide.

Neither were surprised when he didn’t take the phone, but watched with an intensity as Rohan put the food into the bowl and began carrying it outside. She resisted the urge to reach out, as she would for anyone else, when his shoulders started to rock forward and back, the time was two fifty nine. At exactly three o clock, they watched as he set the bowl under the fire escape, centered behind the rubbish bin, measured and marked two feet from the wall. And they saw the stray cat edge out from behind forgotten scrap piles in the alley, cautiously approaching the man he didn’t know, before recognizing the bowl and hurrying forward. “Thanks, love.”

“Thank you.” Stevie echoed.

“No problem, little dude. Enjoy your day, if you want to call again at seven, I’ll be here to water the plants. Swear, I’m following the schedule to a T. You can catch me up on the big day.”

As soon as the call ended, Stevie was directing himself back out of the crowded room they were in, and she watched him meander down the corridor to the room Lucas had set up for him.

Only for an annoyed voice to cut into her attention, “Love?” Reese scoffed, “Bit familiar to address a friend, innit?”

Foster snorted, “Maybe, but how else do you address the person you’ve been dating for two years?”

Reese was gobsmacked, staring at her like she’d grown two heads, “Wha-“

She waved her hand, “Yeah, yeah, my parents wanted to set us up. But it’s not because of me being single, it’s because they refuse to acknowledge that my boyfriend understands my brother and loves him as much as I do. They think I need to find someone that loves me despite Stevie. Not including him. And that’s where we differ.” She shrugged stifling a laugh as the man stomped away. She didn’t feel the need to explain, even though she would when prompted. Lucas understood, because he loved Stevie just as much. Her mates understood, because again they loved Stevie just as much. But Rohan had always been her best mate. Despite the feelings she had spent years smothering inside, she never let them bubble to the surface until she had seen it one day.

Stevie had been having a terrible day. They needed to take the tram because her car had died, people kept getting too close and bumping into him, his dinosaur had gotten wet when someone spilled juice on it at the café they had stopped at for lunch, the waitress had given him mango slices instead of apple slices and he bit into it without looking as he counted the tiles in the ceiling. He hated the texture of mangos, too slimey. She wasn’t sure what she could do, what could be done.

And then Rohan had gotten the text about it, showing up at her flat without her ever uttering the request. He distracted Stevie with the DVR’d episodes of How the States Got Their Shapes he’d recorded for them to watch together, giving Foster time to wash his triceratops and prepare food that he would eat. And when she finally made it back to the living room, she saw Stevie- eyes still focused on the tv- reaching and gently resting his hand on top of Rohan’s. She had nearly dropped the plate, surprised to see him touching anyone else. Rohan had stiffened, imperceptible to Stevie, and glanced back at her with nearly teary eyes.

That was when she knew.

Because yes, admittedly she used Stevie’s attachment to her as a shield, a test, but not to keep people away.

But to keep him protected.

Foster always knew that she would go to the ends of the Earth for Stevie, so anyone that wanted to be in her life needed to be able to be in his.

Rohan had been in her life nearly as long as Stevie had, ten years compared to his twelve, and he treated her brother like his own. He helped her find everything she needed for guardianship, he would babysit during the seldom times she needed to go to the office for work, and he learned the boy’s schedule by heart so that he could help him get through the day.

So when he made a move that night, after Stevie had fallen asleep holding his hand, Rohan had originally only given her a hug and promised to always be there when she needed a shoulder to lean on.

Somehow the lines got blurred in that talk and they ended up confessing to each other in the same breath, but she would never look back.

Because Rohan was exactly what she wanted, exactly what her brother needed, and everything in between.

Masterlist

[queen-rainy-love]

Hi hope im not bothering you!!

Can you do a scenario of Gumball stealing Mint Choco’s violin? And Cherry says that he’s taking this “rivalry” too far (hc of mine lmao). He says its fine, and that its better than exploding his stage. Pancake agrees with Cherry and tells him that Avocado will get mad at him, and says he has seen Mint Choco being stressed out too much if he doesn’t have his violin. Gumball thinks about it, but shrugs it off and tells them he think MC can do fine without his “precious little violin.”

Annnd…then we see Mint Choco having an entire meltdown about his missing violin. He’s hitting his head with his hands and walking around in circles with his eyes closed, not responding to his friends (going nonverbal). Vampire, Herb, and Sparkling are trying to calm him down. Herb holds Mint’s hands and reassures him that Rye, CC, and Almond are finding his violin. Mint Choco cries and shakes his head trying to tell him “No they’re never gonna find my violin” but Vampire tells them they will. Sparkling also says that whoever took it will face the consequences.

Almond and Rye eventually finds Gumball with the violin. Clotted Cream demands Gumball to come with them. They all go to MC and Gumball sees Mint Choco’s hair disorganized, tear stains, and he looks a bit sweaty. Almond pushes Gumball gently towards MC, and Rye tells him what he wants to say to MC. He tells him sorry for messing with him and for stealing his violin, and gives him it back. Mint Choco stares at him but simply “Hmph!” And stomps away from him, of course harshly getting his violin back.

Vampire tells Gumball he’ll probably accept his apology but also says this: “You really should’ve done that, he’s autistic and he gets extremely overwhelmed.” Gumball asked him what does autistic mean. Everyone just sighs in disappointment, and CC and Herb explain it to him. Gumball says: “Oh…I really messed up, didn’t I?” Sparkling tells him that he did but says maybe this will teach you not to mess with anyone else. Almond also punishes him by making do community service for a week.

(fun fact: this happened to me in 3rd grade before I got diagnosed with autism 💀👍. Sorry for projecting my experience. Sorry for also bothering you—)

(Also this is a 1/2. Part 2 soon.)

Hello! This doesn't bother me! I don't mind writing this. Also, this will be the first time I've written a character with autism, so please let me know if I did anything wrong.

Let's go!

*The scene is set in the Parfait District of the Cookie Kingdom. We follow Gumball, Cherry, and Pancake sneaking around Sparkling's outdoor bar. Sitting right on the bar was a green violin case.*

Cherry: *concern* Are you sure this is a good idea? Don't you think this rivalry thing is going too far? Won't we get in trouble?

Gumball: Don't worry, cuz. It'll be fine. And besides, this is better than exploding his stage with paint. I'm not dealing with Aunt Avocado again.

Pancake: I agree with big sister Cherry. Mom will get mad at you if you do this. Plus...I've seen Mint Choco stressed out whenever he's away from his violin. I don't think you should do this prank.

*Gumball thought about his prank a bit more. But he brushes it off and grabs the violin case. He then runs off, with Cherry and Pancake running after him.*

Gumball: (I'm sure Mint Choco will be fine without his precious little violin.)

*Three minutes later, the scene changes to Mint Choco having a meltdown. He hits his head with his hands while walking in circles and his eyes closed to keep tears from falling. Vampire, Herb, and Sparkling tried to calm him down, trying to get a response from him, only to find out that Mint Choco has gone nonverbal.*

Herb: Mint Choco. *gently grabs Mint Choco's hands* Everything is going to be okay. Rye, Clotted Cream, and Almond are looking for whoever took your violin. Let's sit down and-

Mint Choco: N-no! *starts shaking his head* No! They're not gonna find it! Never gonna find it!

Vampire: Hey...it's okay. They will find it. They're the best searchers in the kingdom.

Sparkling: And those thieves will face consequences once they're caught. I'm sure of it.

Herb: Let's get you to sit down and we can get you something to drink. Would that be okay? *Mint Choco nods* Alright.

Sparkling: I'll get you some grape soda to drink.

*Meanwhile, Almond, Rye, and Clotted Cream were still searching for Mint Choco's violin. They looked around to find the green violin case.*

Clotted Cream: Where could it be?

Almond: It should be around here...*notices Gumball holding something familiar.* Hey Rye...

Rye: I see him. Oi! Boy! *Gumball flinches and turns his head around* Whatcha got there?

Gumball: N-nothing!

Almond: Really? Because I don't remember your cannon being that small and green.

Gumball: Um...

Clotted Cream: Save it. We already know. Go give Mint Choco his violin back. Now.

Gumball: And if I don't?

Clotted Cream: We'll tell Avocado about this prank.

Gumball:...Fine...

*The group walked all the way back to Sparkling's outdoor bar. Occupying there was Mint Choco, Vampire, Herb, and Sparkling, three of each were keeping an eye on Mint Choco and making sure he was alright. Gumball was shocked by what he saw. Mint Choco looked nothing like he usually looks like: his hair was disorganized, his face had tear stains running down his face, and sweat was dripping off his face.*

Almond: Go on. *gently nudges Gumball toward Mint Choco*

Rye: You better tell him you're sorry for all that you did.

*Gumball walked up to the older Cookie. He took a deep breath before speaking up.*

Gumball: Um...Mint Choco? *Mint Choco looks up and his eyes widen as Gumball hands over his violin case* I...I'm sorry for taking your violin. I was just pulling a prank. I didn't think it would go this far. I'm sorry.

*Mint Choco looks at his violin case, then at Gumball. Before Gumball could say anything else, Mint Choco harshly yanks the violin case away from Gumball.*

Mint Choco: Hmph! *stomps away*

*As everyone watches Mint Choco stomps away, Vampire flicks Gumball's forehead.*

Gumball: Ow!! I apologized! But he didn't accepted it!

Vampire: Oh don't get him wrong. He'll probably accept your apology but you really shouldn't have done that.

Gumball: How was I suppose to know that he'll react to like that?!

Vampire: Well, he's autistic! He gets extremely overwhelmed!

Gumball: ...What? Autistic? What is that?

*Everyone sighs, leaving Gumball feeling a bit dumb.*

Herb: You are a child...but you should still know about this. You see...Autism, and I'm simplifying this a lot, is where a Cookie has difficulty in social and communication skills.

Clotted Cream: Now, not every Cookie has the same symptoms for autism but there are some similarities that do contribute. Like a delay of spoken language, a.k.a. going nonverbal or being sensitive to loud sounds.

Herb: And Mint Choco will have his anxiety heightened if he gets triggered.

Gumball: Oh...I really messed up, didn't I?

Sparkling: You did, but hopefully, this will teach you to not cross a line with other Cookies. Pranks are only funny when everyone finds it funny, not just you.

Almond: That's a good lesson and I think you should also have a punishment to really let the lesson sink in. Community service for a week.

Gumball: ...That's fair.

[boxboysandotherwhump]

Monsters and mushrooms

Tags:  @salamancialilypad  @whumpfigure @albino-whumpee @comfy-whumpee  @ashintheairlikesnow   @haro-whumps   @moose-teeth @vickytokio​ @yet-another-heathen​ @orchidscript

A Nature fun fact: Bioluminescent mushrooms do exist actually and snails have the habit to foam when distressed in order to deter predators and protect their soft body from tiny satans like ants.

Chapter 4

CW: emotional overload, negative stimming, fear of abandonment, hints at past abusive parent

Sahar hasted up to the farm, stumbling on the crooked steps.

He knew he wasn’t supposed to cry but he’d forgotten how to stop and the world around him dissolved into a melted aquarelle painting of leaves and grass and roots as he stormed past the house. 

He wedged himself between the root and the old stump they chop firewood on, eyes fixed on the axe still rammed inside, his back hitting the root over and over and over again, while he purged all the unwanted feelings from his body through movement. 

There would be bruises tomorrow, Sahar thought when his violent rocking finally slowed into a gentle rhythm.

His lips trembled around one long shaky exhale and his tears finally subsided. Their tracks were only crusty streaks of salt water now, not overwhelming aches.

Sometimes, Sahar hated his body, hated it for being overwhelmed by the stupidest things, hated to have a brain full of misfiring neurons at war with themselves. A brain that made it unbelievably more difficult to exist, as what he was, in this world.

Maybe this was some kind of divine punishment.

But for what?

“Sahar?” Moira’s head peeked over the root and her worried face peered down at his cowering form. “There you are, sweetheart.”

He didn’t meet her eyes, only tugged his knees tight to his chest, ready to hide his face from whatever scolding was to come.

There had always been reprehension when he hadn’t been able to behave himself. Until all of his mother’s angry words hadn’t been enough and she’d abandoned him. At long last. 

Ugly icky fear gnawed away at his insides, a sharp toothed beast he desperately wanted to banish but couldn’t. He rocked up against the root once more. Let his shoulder blades collide with it until he  felt the scratch of rough bark through his grey linen shirt.  

Sometimes his thoughts paused, stayed on safe routes and away from the maelstroms of his ever racing mind when he rocked or tapped or hummed enough. But now was no such time. .

Sahar’s thoughts spun and spiraled. Crashed violently into one another on their collision curses.

Please don’t throw me out. Away. I can behave. I can be disciplined. I promise. I promise. I promise. Please!

The curtain closed and left the window dark.

“Sahar?”

Wait.

There were no curtains here.  And no city streets. No concrete roads or bleeding knees.

Only warm earth under his fingertips. 

A long grass blade brushed his calf and Sahar closed his eyes to focus on the barely there tickle against his skin. The expansion of his ribcage, how it filled with the lavender scented air, inherent to his home, on every inhale and his eyes fluttered open.

“Yeah. I’m here.”

Here. Here. Here. And I can stay.

Moira began to heave Asmodea over the root with a loud huff that had Sahar instantly uncurl and twist around to take the snail with a firm, gentle grip from her arms. The snail immediately clung onto him as best as her soft slimy body allowed, wiggling in exasperated little waves until Sahar finally sat back down and put her over his lap.

“There, there baby. There you you you, there you  go.”

He couldn’t help but smile as Asmodea draped herself flat over his legs, making no move to retreat into her shining shell. It’s brown and black stripes still shimmered from the shower Sahar had given her yesterday. 

“Sahar? Can you listen to me?”

Hunching protectively over Asmodea, he gave a hesitant nod.  “Yes.”

Moira didn’t like it when she had to repeat herself. It made her livid when he or Ansgar ended up absorbed in one-

Ansgar.

Something hot and heavy lodged itself in Sahar’s throat at the memory of his furious gaze. Ansgar had never looked at him like this, ever before, but Sahar realized why, now, after he had a moment to collect his racing thoughts, to calm his hammering heart.  He really had been bad. Immature, thoughtless, utterly ludicrous.

But even so he knew. God how he knew.

Even after everything-

“Ansgar and Eric persuaded the… headhunter, to try his luck up in Berlin.” Moira began, lips pursed in displeasure. “Your house arrest remains nevertheless. Don’t give me that look. You’ve been irresponsible and ill-mannered, young man. No matter how good a reason you may think you had, you have to control yourself.”

A protest burned on the tip of his tongue, but he swallowed the sizzle of anger down, buried it deep inside himself where all his other unsafe emotions were banished.

“I know. I I- I’m sorry.”

Moira shook her head with a sigh, grey curls swishing softly from side to side. “Just be better from now on and stay put for the next few days.  No strolling through the farm woods either.”

His fingers began to tap an anxious rhythm onto Asmodea’s shell, while her body pulsed in soothing waves over his thighs. One of her eyes gently nudged his forearm.

“What, uhm what, but if if if one of the snails, if one  gets lost and-“

Moira’s strict tone nipped his tender try at backtalk at the bud, rendering him silent for good.

“Ansgar and I will take care of that then. I have to go now. The others already left to check the InD-Unit’s for a possible breakthrough. I don’t trust one word out of this guy’s mouth, and I expect you to stay close to the house. Did I make myself clear?”

The scar on his arm stretched uncomfortably as he curled tighter around Asmodea, desperate for his friend’s silent support. Their soft body wiggled gently in response.

“Yes, ma’am.”

------------------------------------------------

“We gonna go pick glowy shrooms! Glowy shrooms! Glowy shrooms!”

Mara shrieked, running in circles around Charlotte, a woven basket clutched tightly in her small brown hands. Her yellow hairband fluttered and the ‘thud thud thud’ of her prosthetic leg got drowned out by the other children’s laughter, hot on her heels in a tumultuous chase for the basket.

A small pale boy broke out into a bright grin as he caught himself from stumbling over the hem of his pants, way too long for his small, stubby legs.

“Did Julian steal Hanne’s clothes again?” Kaja emerged from one of the orphanage’s many crooked entrances with a box of flashlights under one arm. A bag full of pocket knives dangled from the other as she dodged a low hanging wooden beam with practiced ease.

Charlotte took the box from her with an irritated sigh. “I’m glad he’s wearing clothes at all, this time.”

“Are you sure you can handle them on your own?”

Kajas cocky grin vanished under Charlotte icy glare. Blue eyes frosted over as she yanked the bag from Kajas hands and shouted: “Everyone who does not want to stay home lines up here now! You don’t lose your flashlight and when I see one pocket knife flicked open for anything other than picking mushrooms you celebrate the festival in your room. Am I clear?”

The children’s excited shrieks died in an instant as they hurried to get in line, waiting obediently for Charlotte to hand every one of them their items and making a show off storing them dutifully away in their pants pockets and backpacks.

The perfect picture of orderly compliance.

Everyone knew it would last for as long as it would take them to leave the orphanages grounds.

___

 The academy yard’s gravel crunched under Gideon’s boots as he snuck away from yet another disciplinary task. He had scrubbed all the bathrooms to shine in the past, had assisted in the kitchen more than once, and had sorted the trainings gear enough times to know it by heart.

Sometimes he even understood why it always ended up like this.

What he couldn’t understand, however, was having to clean up the entire two story training hall because that stupid farm boy provoked him. For once, he hadn’t even done anything. At least nothing that wouldn’t have been deserved.

Not that the little shit had been helpless.

“Where do you think you’re going?!”

Gideon nearly choked at his upperclassman’s call. His hands clutched the spear’s strap dangling from his shoulder tighter and  he turned to face the young man who had hurried over from their living quarters. His dark thick brows were harsh, frowning lines in a permanently stern face.

“Berkan.” The corners of Gideon’s mouth twitched. He was really in no mood to deal with this stuck-up right now. “Just out for some late night practice.”

It wasn’t even a lie. He did want to get some extra training in, only someplace where he had some damn peace for once. Who could have thought the countryside would be even more suffocating than a life under his father’s roof.

Turning around before Berkan opened his mouth in protest Gideon hurriedly added,“Just finished the cleaning ‘n shit. Go look for yourself if you want.” before he skidded down the large staircase leading down from the academy campus.

Even if Berkan decided to check up on his task Gideon would be already gone by the time the other boy realized he hadn’t done shit.

 ____

 Sahar rubbed slow circles over Asmodea’s head, right between her antennas. It was one of her favorite spots, right after the underside of her foot, when Sahar would gently wipe it clean with a fluffy towel whenever she’d managed to get something unpleasantly stuck to her body. Like the godforsaken acidic tree sap she had blindly glid through on their first forest excursion.

Asmodea carefully extended one eye, gently poking Sahar’s other hand while she began to softly nibble his leg. The raspy sandpaper-like sensation made him chuckle and his fingers began to tap over the warm earth. 

“Hey, hey hey. I’m fine. Don’t, don’t worry.”

Another enthusiastic nibble made him smile, bright and toothy for the first time on a day unpredictable like a summer monsoon.

Sahar was just about to coax Asmodea from his lap and get some strawberry, when a gut wrenching shriek pierced the evening air. 

Something rustled through the bushes.

He shouldered Asmodea and sprung to his feet in one fluid motion, eyes fixed on the timberline and heart stuck in his throat.

Don’t tell me?! Did something break through the border after all?

His pulse hammered in his ears as Sahar listened to the sound of snapping twigs, to the rapid ‘thud thud thud’  coming closer with every second ticking by. His thoughts raced. Would he be fast enough to hurl Asmodea over the root? To jump after? His eyes snapped to the axe. Could he run at all?

The bushes parted.

Sahar was about to throw his friend over the root, risking an injury to her precious shell, when he saw who had screamed. His body froze dead in its tracks and Asmodea fummed in paniked protest. 

Mara had burst out of the thick bushes, covered in scratches, her little face blotchy and tear crusted. The yellow hairband that had been seemingly fused to her head was nowhere to be found and the glittering drawings on her prosthetic leg were smeared over with dirt. Sahar was kneeling by her side in an instant.

“Hey hey hey hey what- what happened? Mara?”

Wiping at tears rolling in endless rivers down flushed chubby cheeks, Sahar scanned her shivering disheveled form for injuries that, to his immense relief, didn’t seem to exist.

“Hey hey hey, It’s fine. It’s fine now. I- I’m here. Every- everything’s fine, fine now.”

“Nonononono.” Her tiny hands fisted in his shirt as she pressed her forehead against his collarbone, shaking and rubbing her head into Sahars skin.

Her fluffy curls brushed his chin.

“Monster. A monster. Monster at the glowy clea- clealing!”

“Glowy- what what what do, what do you mean?”

His hands tapped a rapid-fire rhythm over her shaking shoulder blades as Sahar tried to make some sense of her choked-off babbling. 

Sobbing, Mara dug the remnants of a squashed luminescent mushroom out of her pocket. The glowing blue pulp dripped down her fingers and painted sparkling droplets of night sky onto the muddy earth.

“Oh. Oh! The the The clearing! I know, I know, know now. That that that’s close. Were, were were you, were you- were- fuck.” Balling his hands into fist tight enough to leave crescent indentations in the soft flesh of his palm, Sahar forced a long breath in through his nose and out of his uncooperative mouth.

Slow now, sweetheart. Don’t get too worked up again.

“Were you and the others pick- pick picking- for the fest?”

Burying herself back against Sahar’s chest with a frantic nod Mara howled: “The others- the monster, the monster trapped them!”

A breakthrough. Fuck, fuck. Fuck! There must have been one.

She trembled as he held her at arm’s length, meeting dark panic hazy eyes with a determination he thought had died that fateful autumn night eight years ago.

“Listen Mara. I, I I go to the clearing and and and you run to to to the, run to the tea house. Every- everyone’s gonna be, be there warming up for for for for tomorrow.”

He hastily wiped her cheeks before hoisting her over the root. Sahar flashed her a wry smile, trying to look braver than he felt.

“Everything’s gon- gon- gonna be fine.”

Sahar willed his hands not to shake as he tore the Axe from the cutting stump and vanished into the woods.

[read-weep-repeat]

Make it better

(A/N): A Drabble for the sugar baby! mc and soon to be series. 

Warnings: Ceo! Caregiver! Jimin x Autistic! Regressor! MC, (no regression in this Drabble, it’s just mentioned), mentioned ot7 x reader, autistic sensory overload, use of title “daddy”, fluff 

---

“Daddy, make it stop.” You whined, muffled sobs scratching at the back of your throat. Your red, puffy eyes looked up to observe his panicked movements; his shoulders and back nervously flexing under a pale blue button down as he ran to his desk. 

“Daddy’s got you, pumpkin.” Jimin mumbled, “Just one ‘sec”. His hands made quick work of his drawers, flinging them open for your items. He saw your normal regressive items like coloring books and crayons- not what he needed. His last drawer was tossed open haphazardly, throwing the contents around the wooden confines.

Noise Canceling Headphones and a small stack of clothing were pulled into his arms and laid onto the couch next to you. You were rocking back and forth with both of your knees drawn to your chest, and your palms held over your ears. Tears pricked and fell from the corners of your eyes, casting hot streaks down your cheeks. His heart tightened and his own eyes watered as you whimpered again. “C’mon.” He whispered, “Let daddy fix it.” 

Getting to your daddies office was normally quick, easy, and not overwhelming. Today was the opposite. You had opted out of taking a taxi, thinking you would enjoy the walk. You did not. Walking along city streets was torture for your autistic traits. The cars whizzing by felt like a drill being jammed into your ears, the heat of the sun bouncing off the concrete stung your skin, and the scratchy feeling of your new sweater was sandpaper being used like a pumice stone on the calloused foot that was now your back. 

Your meltdowns weren't as common anymore, now that you had boyfriends that took care of your sensory issues more than even you did, but they were never any less extreme. They always felt like an all consuming agony that ate away at you until the stimuli was completely gone. 

Now, Jimin was coaxing your hands away from your ears to slip on your headphones and planting firm kisses across your cheeks. The firmness of his touch in moments like these was grounding, reminding you of the stimuli that was present and safe. You nodded when he asked if that was better, closing your eyes as he removed the last of the torturous wool touch. 

“There you go, pumpkin.” He muttered, balling up the sweater and throwing it into the corner of his office. He made a mental reminder to check the tag. He’d need to add it to the running list of your texture aversions filling a certain file on his desktop. Your breathing steadied as he slipped one of his gym shirts over your form, fingers dancing happily across the satisfying fabric. God, he loved you in his clothes. He’s loved it since the first time he saw you curled up in his hoodie after a long date together, but it meant even more after you shared your diagnosis with him and his brothers. 

Even though it was coincidence, the fact that none of his clothes textures seemed to bother you made him cocky. It was as if that small alignment meant you were made for each other, or at least he was made to take care of you. Which he would happily do until his last day. He sat down next to you, his eyes still glued to your satisfied expression. 

“Thank you, daddy.” 

His train of thought left him abandoned at the station as he looked over to you. Your eyes were fluttering across his features, with a calm smile spread across your face. Your eyes were no longer red, and the puffiness was decreasing quickly as you finally settled comfortably into the couch. Your hands made small adjustments, twitching and twirling in your lap. It was a calm stim he had come to recognize in the beginning of your relationship. 

He smiled down at you. “Of course, pumpkin.” 

You faced front again and continued your stims. Jimin watched, his chin in the palm of his hand and his lips quirked in a smile as he zoned out to the methodical twitch of your fingers. Your voice brought him back to attention. 

“Can I tell you about the stegosaurus?” 

He laughed, leaning his head back. You were perfect. 

“Fuck yeah, pumpkin. Tell me all about it.” 

[princesscyr-fn]

Brothers x Autistic! MC Tidbits/Headcanons

I figured I’d do one as I’m autistic and I wanna be included in things. At the same time however, autism is a spectrum and each of us experience different behaviors and such. As such, each MC for each brother is different so everyone feels included! These are meant to be platonic but you can interpret this however you want. I’m asexual so writing actual romantic stuff makes me very uncomfortable lol.

|Masterlist is here|

MC is gender neutral, yall

Available on Ao3, Wattpad

Lucifer

♡ Clashing with one another from the get go. ♡ Lucifer tends to criticize you, and its mostly unintentional. He’s just looking out for you, though his pride prevents him from admitting that he cares about you. ♡ One day though, the usual comment that falls from his lips about you ends up making you snap. As a result, you are calling him every name under the blocked sun in the Devildom. (Satan LOVES this.) This is when Lucifer realizes he made a fucky wucky. (Thanks @error-code-606 lmao) ♡ Lucifer gets a super harsh reality check from Satan, reminding him that you are autistic and that constant put-downs is bad for a persons self-esteem/image issues. For once, pride feels guilt bubbling in his gut. ♡ From then on, Lucifer is more mindful of how he words his issues with you. (Still staying blunt, which you appreciate.) All the while he praises you from time to time for all the good stuff you’ve done thus far. ♡ Lucifer would keep mental notes of all your stims and triggers. ♡ Entertains stim toys and isn’t bothered by such as he tries to work. ♡ Lucifer would play soothing music for you, mostly classical or easy listening. Something to tingle your sensory. ♡ He stops your meltdowns before you could fully lose control of yourself. ♡ Soft hands are your weakness and Lucifer’s hands don’t disappoint. He’ll let you hold his hands anytime you desire. ♡ Lucifer's office is the best spot for you to have quiet time. ♡ You can talk his ear off and he would love every second of it, deep down.

Mammon

♡ He was quick to pick up on your behaviors before you could push him away. ♡ He is able to joke with you, both of you laughing like hyenas all the way. ♡ Mammon would never make fun of your stutter or mispronunciation of words. He’s patient and tries his best to help you. He absolutely hates when the other demons (not his brothers) make fun of you for something you have no control over. ♡ Both of you would find comfort in each other. ♡ You would absolutely adore his hair. Being a fan of bright colors and his hair being as white as angel wings. Bless his heart, he will allow you to play with it while denying how much he likes it. ♡ He knows the sound of coins is one of your favorite sounds sensory wise. He always makes sure to have some coins on him. ♡ Mammon would remember all of your fixations and then try to shower you in gifts relevant to your current likes. ♡ He loves music and will sing with you no matter how goofy you both sound. ♡ Late night Hell’s Kitchen runs are mandatory. ♡ You are the only person he would try so hard not to steal from. (He’d fail miserably and just keep your stuff instead of selling it.) ♡ Class would be hilarious with him, he’s a class clown. ♡ While he may be a class clown, I think he would somewhat try a bit harder on his work because you encourage him to do his best every single day.

Leviathan

♡ Things between the two of you are tense at first as both of you are socially awkward and standoffish. ♡ Though once you’re both comfortable, you will talk each others ears off about anime, video games, and everything under the blocked sun of the Devildom. ♡ You two will develop a secret language that the other brothers won’t understand. Imagine all that shit talk. ♡ You’re both stimmers! While Levi has physical and vocal stims, yours are mostly vocal with the occasional twitch and thigh slap. ♡ You both are major plushie enthusiasts. Prove me wrong. (You can’t.) ♡ Eye contact is difficult to maintain between the two of you, with both of you either yelping, blushing, and looking away while sputtering nonsense. ♡ Mention your love or interest in aquatic life or the sea and watch him fall in love with you, (he’s a sea monster, duh) though he will deny it smh. ♡ You both share a love for slime and will buy a lo of it on your trips to the human world. (When you two feel like doing things like that.) ♡ Levi will most certainly dress as a cat maid so long as you do it too. ♡ Stim games are 100% your favorite games to play with him. (Minecraft, Terraria, Fortnite, No Mans Sky...) ♡ Levi figures out that the sound of the ocean soothes you, and will imitate the sounds in his fish tanks to help you relax. ♡ You two make the best cosplay duo. No question about it.

Satan

♡ He is more understanding than you were led to believe. (Shame on you, Lucifer.) You avoided him at first until you found yourself in a heated debate with him regarding human world fauna kingdom. This conversation, though heated, gave you the chance to actually talk to him. It was then the realization hit that Lucifer intentionally kept you two apart. ♡ You two end up becoming close friends. ♡ You hate reading alone as its not engaging and gets boring quickly. So you tell Satan that you would like for him to read to you, which he’d accept without a second thought. ♡ He would remember your likes and dislikes. He would always encourage you to talk about your latest obsession. He’s always interested in hearing about what you have to say. ♡ Jingle cat ears. No explanation needed. (Might dress up as a cat maid with you and Levi, tho.) ♡ He would learn all your stims and triggers so he can help you when you need it. ♡ If you’re the artsy type, you bet he will learn all the crafts for you. ♡ The sound of turning pages satisfies your sound sensory. ♡ Nature walks, lots of them. Quiet moments together means the world to the two of you. ♡ Occasionally you fall asleep next to him as he reads to you. His voice is soothing enough to lull you to sleep. ♡ You two are so close in fact, he rubs it in Lucifer's face. ♡ Satan always finds himself holding your hand whenever you two go out to crowded public places.

Asmodeus

♡ Physical contact wasn’t your thing until you met the avatar of lust. ♡ He took it personally at first when you would stand awkwardly whenever he hugged you or how you would pull your hand away when he would try to hold it. ♡ Once you explain that you are autistic and physical contact was a weird subject for you, he is quick to understand. After all, he is all about consent and wanted to make sure you were comfortable. ♡ Friendship blossoms between the two of you quickly and smoothly. ♡ Asmo would help you with being more extroverted by inviting you to parties. ♡ He would make note of your stims and to satisfy your sensory, he would buy lotions and perfumes. ♡ Getting your nails done is fun and Asmo is perfect for that task. ♡ You have a best friend who will listen to you intently and give you good advice. ♡ Going shopping is less nerve wracking with him. Plus he would give you fashion tips so you can look and feel your best. ♡ The first time you gave him a hug on your own, he wept tears of joy. ♡ Spa days are mandatory. ♡ There is a love between the two of you that does not require a relationship to be valid.

Beelzebub

♡ Beel warmed up to you quickly, especially when he witnesses your appetite at dinner. ♡ He is always curious and asking you questions to better understand you. ♡ You are quick to share your food with him and vice versa. ♡ Eating competitions, though you would lose to him always, unless if he was going easy on you. (Good luck, chief) ♡ Playful and friendly flirting/banter. ♡ Beel would be interested in whatever you obsess with that week. ♡ He is patient with you and doesn’t judge you for things you have no control over. ♡ Includes you in all family activities because hes all about family first. ♡ You two will gush to each other about any and everything. ♡ Hell’s Kitchen dates? Fuck yeah. Those are mandatory. ♡ Though you are picky in terms of texture, Beel would gladly eat whatever food you won’t. ♡ You aren’t a very active person, but that will change with Beel. Eat first, then run it off, human.

Belphegor:

♡ Warmed up to you quickly despite killing you, mainly because you forgave him and still treated him with kindness despite the fact. (Simp *cough* *cough*) ♡ He is very understanding in regards to your sensory, stims, and meltdowns. ♡ Loves laying in silence with you (and vice versa) ♡ Belphie would show you constellations with his magic to help you sleep. ♡ Slime? You bet Belphie would be as entertained as you are on that subject. Cloud slime would be one of his favorites. ♡ You two communicate with each other better in silence. ♡ He would share his cow pillow with you. ♡ Your sensory craves anything that is soft. Belphie would be surprised at first when you mindlessly play with his hair as you lay together. ♡ Your troubling dreams became a little more peaceful with Belphie at your side. ♡ Both of you are big plushie enthusiasts and have a plushie club hangout spot with Levi. ♡ Belphies voice does satisfy your sensory. ♡ Tea time is a fun activity between the two of you. It leads to good naps as well.

[asmo-ds]

Hi, do you have any headcanons for an autistic MC?

with an autistic!MC

a/n: I am basing this off of a high-functioning MC and am not the most educated on autism so if I say something that offensive or just not right then pls message me, I will give u my address and you can come beat me up <3

- When they first arrive to the Devildom, the brothers are a bit nervous because Lucifer already informed them about MC and any health problems, hobbies, needs, etc.

- They have never had to interact with someone diagnosed with autism, as the last time they were in the human world it wasn’t common.

- When they get to know them though they are in love and feel the need to protect them and help them with everything

- if any of them hear someone calling MC a slur or making fun of them whether its behind their back or not, the bully is going to be tortured and/or slaughtered for their words

- Asmodeus and Mammon don't invite MC clubbing with them because they know MC has a hard time in loud crowded places, and the boys would rather stay home with them

- Satan is always interested in learning, so if there are any subjects or hobbies that MC is fixated on he will discuss it with them and learn about it so that he can talk to them 

- If MC is touch sensitive, the boys are always keeping a VERY close eye on them and if someone so much as even brushes up against them by mistake, they are over to MC checking in with them to make sure they are okay

- Lucifer also keeps an eye on any emotional triggers to make sure nothing affects them to the point of a meltdown

- Even though he so often loves seeing people suffer as a powerful demon, he cannot stand to see MC in pain and does everything to protect them from the world around them

- He definitely stays near MC the most and spent days studying everything about autism before MC arrived 

[asmolemmeeatyouout]

The Boys With an Autistic MC HC !! (SFW !)

(aka I’m projecting bc sad) (I also have adhd so there will be adhd moments)

Lucifer:

This boy has so much work yet he still find the time to help you put together a routine

WILL make sure you stick to it

He will rearrange the entire school if it will help you

If any demon and I mean ANY demon is even the slightest bit mean to you they go mysteriously missing the next day

Sometimes he infantilises you but he doesn’t mean to, tell him to cut it out and the shame will rip through him

In line with that you will probably find him cutting the crusts off your sandwiches and rearranging your stuffies, up to you if you want him to stop that (I hate crusts and my teddies deserve to be comfortable too)

Makes sure you’re accommodated everywhere in the devildom not just rad and and the hol

One day you realise his suit jacket? Perfect fabric for stimming

He starts dressing according to the fabrics you like

Let’s you hold his sleeve arm when talking bc it’s a good stim

Will put his jacket on you when you’re overwhelmed and need some familiarity

You start to associate his smell with safety

Mammon:

Pretends he doesn’t care

Treats you the most normal out of all the brothers

Has actually memorised your routine and knows your stressors/meltdown/shutdown triggers

White knights you very subtly

You think demons are very accepting in the devildom but in reality mammon does the same as luci but his approach is much more ‘stop it before it starts’

Buys you stimmies bc he loves the way you look when you’re happy stimming (yes BUYS not steals)

Too embarrassed to give you them so they just appear in your room

He’s just coincidentally in the hallway when you come rushing out to show people

You eventually realise it’s gotta be him bc he’s always there when you find em so you just start running directly to him

Loves it if you have echolalia

Tries to get you to repeat ‘the great mammon’ as much as possible

If he finds you repeating words/beeping at the microwave he will engage and do the same until you happy stim (then he will try get you to repeat ‘mc’s first man the great mammon’

If you start calling him that ?! The boy will melt. (I get intense echolalia with ‘mammonie’ and i think he would straight up die hearing mc go ‘mammonie mammonie mammonie’

After all it makes sense that the great mammon is constantly on your mind

Levithian:

Another nerd ?! Heck yeah!! !

Very glad you aren’t a normie

Perhaps relates the most to your experience against the allistics as ppl don’t like him bc he’s a ‘yucky okatu’

Loves when you talk about a special interest (SI) because you’re just as obsessive as he is

Will try and get you obsessed with anime and manga if you aren’t already

Is a shut in so he gets that people are overwhelming and scary at times

Is uncharacteristically vulnerable and open with you bc he feels like you understand his existence at a deeper level

If you like squishes (and show him first) he will start asking for the deep pressure hugs when he feels he needs them

But ofc bc you’re both you, the method for asking is just repeating the word squish over and over while you hug

Eye contact !? Oh hell no

Most of your conversations are done facing away from each other

Asmodeus:

Same clothes? Comfort items? No no no no no you gotta look beautiful like you are!

Does not entirely get it at first, how can anyone want to wear something more than once?

Once you explain it he will drag you shopping (to high end shops, using avoiding crowds as an excuse to pamper you) to find a signature, beautiful, comfortable and easy to put on outfit for you to wear

He will then buy 30 of them just in case you lose anything

He WILL give you presents randomly after you told him you like to wear clothing with emotional significance

Bonding time includes decorating your ear defenders and sunglasses

If your SI is anything to do with fashion or beauty or just asmo things in general this boy will NEVER leave your side. You become the only person he wants to talk to

If you excited stim by bouncing, hand flapping or squealing he is right there with you creating a feedback loop of excited stimming

When he finds out you like routine he will check you’re doing the beauty routine he made for you every night

If you’re too tired he will do it for you (or even if you just ask he loves being close to you)

If you’re touch repulsed he will ask every time before he even gets close to you (EVERY DAMN TIME ! This man understands consent and the fact that some days touch is too much others it’s not)

Satan:

Acts like lucifer visa the routine n rad but with no infantilising

Reads every study ever done on autism and neurodivergence ever

ANGOR at human world autism studies bc they’re dumb and there’s so much more interesting things to investigate to do with being autistic

He does go to the human world and he does stab a$$ and those involved

If you let him he will study you

Tracks your sleep, eating habits, and mood regulation (after he asks ofc)

Meltdowns? No that’s a regular day in Satan’s head

He lets you use his rage room (he definitely has a room exclusively for smashing stuff) if you feel even a little stressed

Likes talking about your SI’s with you bc it’s rare he finds someone so knowledgeable on a subject

Beelezebub:

The kindest most patient boy

Helps you find foods that don’t mess with your texture issues

Checks to make sure you’ve eaten in case you’ve been distracted and not realised you’re hungry

Doesn’t understand AFRID because food is good?? But is willing to help you with it (see previous points)

Stims with you because it makes you happy

Will let you info dump for hours even if he doesn’t get it

Is generally very warm so he makes the perfect person for squishes

Perfectly happy to just sit in silence and not talk or make eye contact

Belphagor:

Definitely understands the exhaustion that comes with being disabled

If you even look overstimulated he will kidnap you for a nap (whether than be physically or if you’re touch repulsed he will fake an emergency (the emergency is you being over stim Ed) just to get u out, it’s the only thing he puts effort into)

Shares his secret super soft blanket stash bc you are the only one who can appreciate how freaking soft the texture is

Best person to look after you in a shutdown bc he kinda gets it

Gets his own ear defenders and sunglasses so he can sleep in class (claims it’s solidarity with you)

Just enjoys your company like his bro so ditto on the silence thing

(There’s more I can think of but this is already really long, comment if u want part 2)

[faustonastring]

Can I request the main six with an autistic mc, and how they help them through overstimulation, shutdowns, and meltdowns? And how they react to them stimming happy, and anxious? Thank for reading this I love your writing so much

Thanks for requesting! Please just take into consideration that this is going to be super vague because autism is a spectrum with affects every one who has it diffrently, and also take into consideration, I don’t have autism so I’m writing this based on my knowledge and research of it, so take it all with a grain of salt

Also: I’m sorry this took so long to write, I’m like the last person you should ask about this,so I put it off till I was feeling good enough to make sure it’s a little bit accurate

Main six with an autistic Mc

Asra

He brings you home a shit ton of stimming toys when ever he comes back from his journeys/travels (some of which are unique to each place he visited) and he always makes sure there are some on the shop counter when he leaves, and on the night table or any odd place he knows you hang around so if you get anxious when he’s gone they’re will be so,etching for you to stim with easily accessible for you.

When ever you melt down all eyes are on you. Like more than usual which is saying something. If some one is at the shop at the time he politely asks them to leave, and lock the door on their way out. He’ll do anything in his power to make you feel better, wether that be holding you or giving you some space, he’s got you.

Nadia

Your going to have the most expensive collection of stimming toys know to man kind. The best part is: she pays attention to what you like and what works best for you, so she makes sure you have an over abundance of those. And of course the ones she made, especially for you. She also makes sure you have some on you when you go to a meeting, just to check in

When your having a melt down, she’ll swiftly wrap up what ever she was doing and come to your side in a matter of seconds. If she can, she’ll lead you to her room or to her tower, if not she’ll stay with you wherever you are until you calm down. And don’t worry the servants know better than barge in.

Julian

It’s canon that Julian will spoil you to the point of embarrassment so get ready to get spoiled to the max with diffrent stimming toys. He wants to make sure you have one for every occasion, and he finds it adorable when you get excited about something and start stimming with one of the toys he got you.

When your having a melt down he drops what ever he’s doing (or holding) to rush to your side. If your in public he’ll ignore anyone who tries to help, and if he can, he’ll carry you to an alley way, or even the docs or the secret garden, wherever you can ground your self, and he’ll hold your hand the entire time.

Portia

She thinks that when you stim because you’re excited is the cutest thing in the world, especially when your excitement has something to do with her, even if it’s small. It makes her feel loved and wanted.

When your having a meltdown she’s the best at comforting you. Especially if it’s in her cottage, because her cottage is flooded with blankets and pillows, and nice soft things (such as pepi) which are great at bringing her comfort, so they should atleast help you out a little bit. (She is also nice and soft)

Muriel

Like Nadia, he’ll make you fidget toys for you to stim with, and he has a lot of free time so expect a lot of toys. And his heart skips a beat every time he sees you using one of the toys he made for you (especially if your excited) he’s also really good at being able to see how your feeling by how you fidget.

On that note some times he can practically sense a meltdown coming, and he’s great at pulling you away to some where nice and secure, and most importantly safe, just in time. He has a lot of clearings in the woods protected with charms to help you ground yourself.

Lucio

Also like Nadia, you will have the most expensive collection of fidget toys known to man kind. Except while nadias are more thought out and meaningful, Lucios are more flashy and expensive. But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t listen, though, he knows what works best for you trust me.

The second you start to melt down he’s right by your side, shouting at anyone who dares come your way. He’ll listen to you, hold you, talk to you, play with your hair, anything that will get you to cheer up, even the dogs come in to help you if you don’t mind. If you do mind though, lucio will shoo them away, he doesn’t want to make anything worst.

I’m sorry this isn’t exactly what your wanted, and it might not even be accurate, it’s just really hard to be spefic with something like this because it affects so many people in so many diffrent ways, hopefully you can understand!

Masterlist

Request are closed

[apprenticeofcups]

Do you have any thoughts about the main six (or specifically Lucio/Muriel/Julian if you prefer) an autistic MC having a meltdown and the onset of self-consciousness after it’s over? Specifically ones that make them extra hard to communicate with like going nonverbal, just straight up frustration crying, or (my big one lmao) being “contrary” (Meaning that they don’t know what they want or need so they just say no to Everything)? (I can clarify if I didn’t make sense somewhere

🔥The Boys + Autistic MC’s Meltdown

💗Main 6 + Autistic MC

Julian

Figures out (mostly by trial and error) a way to communicate when you’re melting down, whether it’s by signing, squeezing his hand, tugging on his fingers, etc., so he doesn’t bombard you with questions

Uses whatever he has on him to help you ground however works best: smell? his coat is like leather and sea salt and muffles everything else; texture? run your hands over the filigree on the front of his late father’s pocket watch

If you need a sound to focus on, he’ll keep up a running commentary while he takes you somewhere quiet, or ushers people away to give you space - mindless things, really, just poems with pleasing rhymes or travel stories you’ve heard a thousand times

Crying doesn’t faze him - in fact, if crying is what happens, or you want to move a lot, or punch a pillow, he encourages it

He doesn’t get stern, exactly, but he won’t hear any talk of you putting yourself down in the aftermath - “You can’t argue with your body, my love - judging it only hurts you”

Muriel

Chances are, he saw the meltdown coming in the early stages - either he knows your signs for hitting your breaking point, or he recognized the trigger when it happened

Either way, he’s proactive about it; however he can make things safer and more sensory-friendly, he does

It’s incredible how quickly he can overcome his own social anxiety when you’re in panic-mode, ordering everyone out of the room if he has to (and when a guy that big gives an order, people tend to listen)

Communication isn’t a huge hurdle for him. He knows the signs, knows your patterns, and remembers what you need when (and if it’s pressure, dark, touch - good thing he keeps carting that huge cloak around)

As for feeling self-conscious, he usually recommends taking a break, just the two of you - it’s not that he’s going back to his old avoidant ways, but you deserve to take a rest, find a nice distraction, and not worry about people for a bit

Lucio

The first meltdown you had with him was a disaster. His knee-jerk reaction to Get Loud and Play Dumb (”how was I supposed to know-”) didn’t exactly help you feel less self-conscious afterward

Since then, he’s really stepped up his game, asking you what you need when you’re not overwhelmed so he can be good when you are

He’s a social mirror, and he knows if he doesn’t take charge, he’ll get sucked in and make you feel even worse with his own breakdown

When you start ramping up, he sits with you, quietly, keeps his breathing steady, closes the blinds or gives you his cape or whatever you need to keep you grounded, and rides it out

Afterward, the second he’s given the green light to touch you, he pulls you into his lap, kisses your hair, rubs your back, as much physical reassurance as he’s allowed to dish out

☕ Ko-Fi | My AO3 ☕

[watercolourferns]

oof can you do the main 6 with an autistic mc??? btw i love your headcanons and I hope you have a nice day

Hiii! OwO Awh, thank you. I hope you have a nice day, too, and that you like these HC’s. I hope they are well written. ^_^Julian

He’s very mushy and touchy feely and generally very sensory overwhelming.

If you recoil from him or shut off he will get confused and scared, seeing it as a rejection, but he will ask what’s wrong even so.

When you tell him you’re atypical he will research, even ask Nadia to let him use the Palace’s library. 

He wants to know everything about it, but he doesn’t want to pry because he doesn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable.

Once he has a decent grasp on what Autism is and how much of a spectrum it is he will start to shyly ask questions to get a good grasp on how you live it.

He will start to ask before touching you, speak in a softer voice, lower volume, will start to ask if it’s alright for you two to go to the Marketplace or the Red Market. 

He will be a bit mother hen in the beginning, but as he gets used to being around you and starts to memorise your routines and your needs he will ask less and less but you will see that the shop, his house, and the clinic will be a bit more tailored to your needs.

He will never try to “fix you” nor make fun of your stimming if you do stim and will shut down anyone who even tries to say something.

Will condition a whole room in his house for you, to unwind, to feel safe, some sensory items in there too if you need them.

Asra

He knows, he has always known, he just didn’t have a word for it.

He always have given you your space, and the shop has been conditioned for you.

That’s why the backroom is the way it is: a place for relaxation, where there’s not much noise, and there’s things that help you sensory-wise.

He will run the errands most of the time, but if you have to go out, or want to accompany him he will make sure it’s very early, when there’s very little people out and about.

He will be very alert when going out and at the first sign of a melt down he will gently guide you away and into a place where the meltdown can run it’s course with you safe.

He will use magic for this: cool down his hand a bit do he can place it on your forehead and nape to help with the heat and stress, he will use it to try and soothe you, maybe distract you a bit if you’re not having a meltdown but just overwhelmed.

If you don’t want being touched he will keep his distance until you tell him it’s ok.

He will teach you to meditate, since that has seemed to help you with being sensorially overwhelmed.

Nadia

She will call several doctors, but afterwards will realise that there’s nothing to really fix. She will apologise for her knee jerk reaction, though.

She likes time to herself, in the quiet and the peaceful privacy of her headquarters due to feeling overwhelmed with her migraines and the Courtiers, so she understands completely if you ask to be left alone due to feeling sensory overwhelmed. 

Your hyper fixation doesn’t bother her, she tends to do that as well.

If it applies, she will let you stack and count and order her tinkering things while she’s at her hobby if you need stimming.

 It will take time for her to know how to handle your meltdowns, but in the end she will be able to guide you back to your private rooms, reassure you that everything is going to be fine. She will make sure to have plenty of fresh water and soft cushions where to lie down and hide.

She doesn’t have much time during the day, so she will ask Portia to take care of you while she’s away.

But will clear her schedule if you require her. 

You will never have to sit in a meeting with Nadia and the courtiers if you don’t want to.

She will totally and completely shout at someone if they even try to comment on you being atypical.

Portia

She will ask Julian what Autism is and will bombard him with questions the moment you tell her

She’s very bubbly and can be overwhelming, but if you ask her to tone it down a bit she will. 

She will apologise, but if you explain that it’s not that you don’t like her bubbliness but it’s because you get overwhelmed she will go “OHHHHH!!!!” and try to keep that in check.

Her cottage is probably one of the most peaceful places in the palace to be, so that’s a good thing.

If she can keep her boisterous self in check well enough she will be your best ally sensory-wise. 

Any smell, texture, taste, etc, you like she will try to keep you well stocked on it.

Muriel 

People already speculate if Muriel might be on the spectrum due to his demeanor even when he was little.

From all the sic LI’s, it’s possible he will understand you the most because of this.

So he will know when you let you be, when to come close, when a meltdown is coming, etc.

His hut is PERFECT: warm cozy, makes you feel safe, it’s isolated.

He’s the one who least minds your lack of understanding of social queues.

Your bluntness will not bother him at all.

He might seem like the perfect partner for you, but it can also be a double edged sword.

Because you two will retrofeed your bad habits.

But don’t worry, Asra will be there to help the both of you out with socialising and other things that otherwise might be problematic.

So much alone together time!

And nature does help relax you a lot.

Stimming? Sure why not? He’s the last people on this earth that will judge you.

Hyperfixation? Have you been present when he talks about chickens? Hyperfixate and speak endless about anything you like, he will pay attention.

Lucio

Honestly I don’t have much headcanons here because I don’t think he would be a good partner for someone on the spectrum. He’s too flashy, too boisterous, too overwheling. x___x Maybe after his upright ending if there’s one? But right now as the character is? No, it would be a bit too much.Ok, so there you are. These things were written after speaking with one of my closest friends who is on the spectrum. I hope they are ok. x___x

[scriptautistic]

So um... It's a strange ask. So my MC who is autistic starts getting bullied at school because of a thing he cannot control and actually he feels pretty close to the bully (they were friends before it all started). My questions are: How would my MC feel? Will his meltdowns and shutdowns get more and more? How can someone help him? And because he feels like the fault is his - How can someone prove him it isn't? Sorry for my bad English!

Hello, thank you for the ask, and no worries; your English is just fine! This post will involve mentions of abuse like bullying and the emotional effects of said abuse.

The generic idea behind part of my answer will be more stress = more meltdowns/shutdowns. Bullying is a huge source of stress, especially given that rejection and isolation are some of the largest emotional threats to the mind. Bullying plays on both rejection and isolation from other people and targets the bullying victim. Autistic people are much more likely to be victims of bullying and other forms of abuse. Here is an article which goes into different types of bullying and how that may affect an autistic person.

How someone can help him is stop the bullying from happening and help him deal with the psychological fallout, which often manifests as low self-esteem and depression and/or anxiety (especially social anxiety). Therapy for any mental health issues is likely best route, and often people take medications for those mental illnesses to supplement therapy.

Unfortunately no one can prove to your MC that the bullying wasn’t his fault. To do so would be doing the work to raise your MC’s poor self-esteem for them, and that’s a years-long process which only someone can truly do for themselves. It’s a messy process. There is often a lot of shame associated with bullying, and bullies often make their targets feel as though it was their fault they were bullied, and the reason for bullying was some inherent flaw. This focus of bullies’ teasing and cruelty on a characteristic someone cannot easily change prompts a lot of shame, especially if the bullying is repetitive (Which it usually is). 

Your MC must truly feel in his heart it wasn’t his fault, and while others can try to teach him for him, it has to sink in for him, and this will take active work on his part. It’s no easy feat for someone to understand for themselves that someone repeatedly hurting them wasn’t their fault and may take significant amount of time and work to change. It likely won’t be a steady uphill climb, either; there may be really good days in recovering from something like that and there may be really bad days. 

But the most valuable thing to someone who has been bullied are people who are giving and supportive without trying to act like crutches. The people around him would be healthiest if they are consistent, reliable, and respectful of boundaries. If someone else is “supporting” your MC by doing all the work to bolster them, your MC isn’t growing out of a poor self-esteem, and can be very dependent on them. I’d advise learning about the therapy processes to help with depression, anxiety, low self-esteem, and/or suicidal thoughts or actions. You can also look not only into post-traumatic stress and post-traumatic growth. With this information, you can figure out what your MC’s journey to self-love is.

 - Mod Siena

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[scriptautistic]

Do autistic people react to death different than neurotypical people? One of my characters is autistic and he thinks his best friend is dead. And if the MC is revealed to have survived, would he be distrusting that it's actually my MC?

One of the problems I am having trying to answer this question is that, as far as I know, there isn’t a standard way for neurotypical people to react to death. People’s reactions to death, whether neurotypical or not, are very dependent on other factors like personality, relationship to the person who died, and previous experiences with death.

Similarly, there isn’t a standard way for autistic people to react to death. Some autistic people will react to death in a way that seems unusual to neurotypical people, but really this can be true of how a neurotypical person reacts to death too. We don’t speak much about death, at least in the West, but there is actually a very broad range of normal reactions to death.

One thing that you might think about is how death (as a concept) has been explained to the autistic character - if he has been infantilised by the people around him he may have never had the benefit of people discussing death and mortality with him in a meaningful way. If people have only ever spoken in terms of “grandpa has gone to sleep” or “Jonah has gone on a journey and he won’t be coming back but he loves you very much”, your character may lack the vocabulary to process death - he might still know about death, but understand it in a very different way to you. (Your character may have already addressed this himself by reading about death and mortality, even if people haven’t spoken to him about it - it depends on his literacy and cognitive abilities.)

Having said all that, being distrustful of the fact that his best friend is actually alive sounds pretty plausible to me, whether the character is autistic or not. I don’t know how long he has believed his friend to be dead, but it is hard to adjust to the someone dying, and I imagine that it would also be hard to adjust to finding out that they are not dead after all. Especially as generally speaking “dead” is a permanent condition.

-Mod Snail

A few more ideas:

The level of empathy of your character can come into play here. Not necessarly because they empathize with the dead person, though it could be possible depending on their perception of death (existence of an afterlife and so on), but because a person’s death often makes a lot of people sad (think funerals and so on), which might have a massive impact on your character if they have high levels of empathy. On the contrary, if they have low empathy and/or they don’t express their emotions in a typical way, they might be less affected, or at least be perceived as being less affected than most other people, though I would advise you against playing into the “autistic people don’t have feelings” stereotype. Alexythimia could also mean your character could have a hard time processing and identifying the emotions they are actually feeling.

A person’s death, especially if they were close to your character, can result in a massive disruption of routine, with any funeral ceremony (which will probably mean lots of people and is not something your character may be very used to, so it could be quite a distressing event) as well as simply not having the character around. For instance, if their routine used to be to text them every night before going to bed, or seeing them every saturday to hang out, these times in particular might be difficult to deal with for your character.

Even if the feelings are the same between an autistic and an allistic person, they will probably be expressed differently. Very intense negative feelings (or the aforementionned routine disruption or difficulty with big ceremonies) could well send the character into meltdown territory. They may also have specific stims for when they’re feeling bad or trying to soothe/ comfort themself, which is something a neurotypical probably won’t have. 

-Mod Cat

[scriptautistic]

This is something I've gone back and forth on, and I'd appreciate your input. My brother is autistic. I have wanted one of my teenage MCs to have an autistic brother, but not have that relationship be a major part of the story, to reflect that while an autistic sibling such as mine does make home life and sometimes social life quite different from those without autistic siblings, it doesn't totally define you. (Autistic sibling 1/2)

(Autistic sibling 2/2) My concern is that it will come across as trivializing autism, especially since the prospective MC isn’t the POV MC and will just mention her sibling offhand. On the other hand, I don’t want it to be a major element in the story. Do you have advice on how to proceed? Thank you!(And thank you for your insight on the blog. Autism is something very close to my heart, and I’m so glad that more people are being educated about it through this blog and others 😊 )

Hi, there! Thanks a lot for your question. I, for one, would be happy to see more (accurate, realistic, positive) autistic characters in literature. I’d like to see more main characters, but I’m also happy to see more side characters. I like the idea of a main character having someone autistic in their life, not brushing it under the rug, not hiding it, not embarrassed by it. 

Essentially, I’m all for the normalization of autism. Up until now, it’s been largely treated as a tragic disability (and burden on the family). Any story with someone autistic in it is almost always about autism. I would love it if more stories had an autistic character who was just there, not for any particular reason, but because autistic people exist in great numbers and deserve representation. I like the idea of someone saying “your brother is autistic? Oh, that’s so tragic” and your character showing them just how untrue that is.

Obviously I’m all for autistic heroes and villains and main characters, but that doesn’t mean every autistic character has to be the star of the show. Just having someone there is better than pretending autistic people don’t exist, or that if a story isn’t about autism, there aren’t any autistic people in it. And in your case, you are clearly far more qualified to write the perspective of the allistic sibling than the autistic one.

It’s great that you don’t want to trivialize it. Maybe try to find ways to have the autistic brother enter the story a few times, in small ways. There are plenty of options, depending on the type of story you’re writing. Maybe the autistic brother happens to be around and notices some small detail that solves a problem. Maybe a minor conflict happens over the brother stimming or even having a meltdown in public and passers-by gawking. Maybe everyone thinks the MC needs to protect the brother all the time, and at one point, the brother winds up protecting the MC instead. 

You’re already on the right track by showing that he’s not a burden. As long as you’re not using the brother as an accessory to liven up the MC’s backstory, you should be okay. Give him some kind of role. If you could completely remove him from the story without changing anything, maybe just let him be involve in one or two scenes, and not only to make the MC’s social life more complicated. It’s great if you can give him a positive role, let him use his perception of detail and patterns or logical thinking to show how valuable he is as a person.

If you have any more questions, don’t hesitate to send another ask. Happy writing!

-Mod Aira