#autism parents

[catgirl-catboy]

Hate post for parents of autistic children who:

Don't try to take precautions to help their kid avoid meltdowns. Or really, do anything when their child is having a meltdown.

Force their kid to eat food that causes them sensory issues when you could be teaching them how to make healthy food that doesn't. (age appropriate cooking techniques ofc!)

Don't tell their kid about their diagnosis if the kid asking them why they don't fit in.

Don't use proper terminology when talking about their kid's meltdowns and shutdowns. It isn't a "temper tantrum", they literally can't control it.

Forbid their kids from stimming.

Try to shame kids for destructive stims instead of finding them better alternatives.

Disclose the child's status as autistic to total strangers without their permission.

Even think about enrolling their kid into ABA therapy.

You aren't preparing them for society. You aren't making them tougher. You're just making their lives harder for NO goddamn reason. I had parents like that, and I'm an adult now.

None of the fucked up "skills" they tried to teach me are of any use in real life. It was all pointless.

[capricorn-0mnikorn]

~Sigh~ here we go, again.

Here's a video that showed up in the recommendation sidebar of another video I was watching this morning. I don't follow People Magazine, nor am I particularly interested in celebrity news. I imagine the algorithm fed this to me because I've been recently looking for videos on Disability Pride.

Which this, clearly, is not:

More "Disability Parent" human interest stories. Based on his son's posture in that photo, it looks to me like he has cerebral palsy,* but it could be another condition that's adjacent.

Cerebral Palsy and Autism are different conditions. But I think where the Venn Diagram overlaps is the subculture of parents who frame their own identity around the fact that they are "burdened" with disabled kids.

("But, Ann," I anticipate some of you complaining, "you haven't watched the video. How can you tell that's Colin Farrell's attitude?" Whether that's his attitude or not, that how People Magazine has framed it, in order to get clicks, and from what I'm being shown, there's no sign that his son was included in the interview)

*I'm a believer in "Identity first" language. But I'm not sure what the adjective form of "Cerebral Palsy" is. "Cerebrally Palsied?"

[bookquotesfrombooks]

“As has been said over and over, by autistic people who have been advocating and educating for much longer than I have, there is no hating the autism and loving the child.”

Amethyst Schaber

“Unconventional” in Sincerely, Your Autistic Child

[foxglove-garden]

If anyone wonders what it's like to be a parent in 2024, I just had a special needs van driver tell me and my disabled 6 year old to "hurry the fuck up" getting him on the bus because he got excited/distracted by a fallen leaf in our yard for like 0.5 seconds.

[coven-of-genesis]

Affirmations for the parents of a child with autism

1. You are a loving and dedicated parent, doing your best to support your child's unique needs.

2. Your unwavering patience and understanding make a significant impact on your child's growth and development.

3. Each day, you're learning and growing alongside your child, creating a strong bond that will last a lifetime.

4. Your commitment to advocating for your child's needs demonstrates your exceptional parental love.

5. Your child's progress, no matter how small, is a testament to your consistent efforts and encouragement.

6. Remember that it's okay to take breaks and care for yourself too - self-compassion is essential in this journey.

7. Your unconditional love and acceptance create a safe and nurturing environment for your child to thrive.

8. Celebrate the small victories and milestones, knowing that every step forward is a significant achievement.

9. Embrace the uniqueness of your child and the joy they bring to your family.

10. You are not alone in this journey; there is a supportive community of parents and resources ready to assist you.

11. Trust your instincts as a parent, and know that you are making a positive difference in your child's life.

12. Your love and advocacy are helping to break down barriers and promote awareness about autism.

13. Embrace progress, even if it comes with challenges, and remember that growth takes time.

14. You have the strength to overcome obstacles and create a brighter future for your child.

15. Your dedication and love as a parent are making a lasting impact on your child's life and well-being.

[burnt-scone]

Parents of Autistic children will tell their children they did something wrong, won't tell the child what they did wrong or how it was wrong, then when the kid asks what they did and they tell the child they're being manipulative and that they're making excuses.

Usually, the kid did nothing and the parents projecting. And if the kid did do something, they'd never know how to do better because they were never told what was wrong, just that they did wrong.

[big-boah]

This is the kind of BS that makes me cringe.

STOP MAKING PARENTS THINK THEY CAN "CURE" THEIR KID'S AUTISM. Stop it.

(Image ID in alt text)

I have high support needs and went from an abusive/neglectful environment to a very supportive one about 10 years ago.

But did my autism change? No. Did my "challenging traits" change? NO. Actually that's a lie. They got "worse". More visible. Louder. Less speech, more AAC. More big stimming. It was because:

- I got older.

- New meds/changing medical challenges.

- I felt more comfortable expressing myself in my preferred style and I gave less fucks about what others thought of me.

- I became MORE COMFORTABLE in general.

This is the kind of shit we need to rally against. This is also why it's especially important to uplift voices of folks with higher support needs. We need to inform these "professionals" that, no, this isn't something that "goes away".

Seeing someone heal from environmental distress/trauma doesn't magically mean they're "cured" or even "getting better", it does not make "challenging traits" any LESS of a challenge for the AUTISTIC PERSON.

(And you know, eventually they need to update the diagnostic criteria to not just be based on little white boy science. Especially if it affects like 1-5% of the world population but that's a story for another day)

[thecanadianweeb]

HELP! I keep getting rashes for no reason at night and I’m not sure why.

I don’t think it’s an allergy cuz I’m able to breathe all of the time it happens, but I do get a feel of a rapid heartbeat even though it is a normal rate so it could be an allergy.

My dad thinks it’s a heat rash, but I’m not sweaty when it happens.

I honestly think it’s stress that’s causing it, as when I’m stressed, the rashes get worse and more severe.

I would go to a walk in but it’s closed right now.

I am also prone to panic attacks and I’m autistic, so I might not say the correct thing or know what’s up.

I also have to keep a doctor’s note with me wherever I go as people won’t understand that I’m autistic unless there’s proof.

And I’m still treated like a child when I have my meltdowns or panic attacks cuz apparently people might not take it seriously and make it worse.

It’s so bad that I’m failing my exams and classes in university and I don’t wanna pay extra money for an ambulance to take me anywhere if it gets really horrible.

I feel as I’m running out of time and might have to get my self institutionalized for my safety.

Idk what to do as chat spaces need cellular data and I don’t have that. Can’t use helplines either or my parents will dismiss it as a meltdown and turn off the phone.

I’m 18! I should be on my own, in my own house with access to all medical care FOR FREE!

But this damn country and cruel world made it that you have to pay for everything!!

[makiruz]

"You don't understand what it's like to have an autistic child who has a meltdown in the supermarket"

But why is your kid having a meltdown in the supermarket? I'm serious, what external or internal input is causing this and what can it be done to prevent it in the future?

[raging-guanche]

my mom just said for the 100th time she can have a life bcs of her disabled 17 yo son

like, sorry ig? you're not the victim here nor im guilty but whatever

[alexgrand1]

This Christmas is so peaceful and quiet.

I went no contact with several people (including family) and I filed a harassment order against my ex-husband who has been stalking me all year.

I look up and right next to me are my #autistic #nonverbal 6-year-old son and a year-old painting.

My son is starting to show more affection in his own words and not echolalia. He hugs and kisses me, saying, “I love you, Mommy.”

I find it very difficult to receive his affection. I dissociate a lot because my body has endured so much abuse and pain.

But this painting reminds me that I can feel grounded and connected. My body doesn’t have to always feel like a prison.

All year I have tried therapies--hypnosis, EMDR, talk therapy--to help with my nightmares, insomnia, PTSD, digestive issues…I mean the list could go on forever.

I drained all my savings to travel to Spain where I bought so much #crochet yarn and art supplies.

In this very moment I'm using those tools to keep myself grounded as I wish my son a Merry Christmas.

Creating is such a beautiful thing. Whether it’s creating life, creating boundaries, or a simple painting.

And sometimes just creating art for the sake of creating can be so healing!

I don't really post on here a lot but I want to try. I want to try connecting with people again--the right people for me. Setting boundaries is helping but closing myself off is not.

I want to find ways to ground myself and to be present.

Right now is such a gift.

Merry Christmas~

[notesbynor]

neurodivergent and queer people how are we feeling?

[bookquotesfrombooks]

“The autistic community generally agrees that ABA is an abusive practice, yet most of the energy is spent on shaming frightened parents rather than ending institutional practices that target children of color.”

Jules Edwards

I Will Die On This Hill

[makiruz]

Remembering the time I read a question at Yahoo Answers that was someone asking for advice to be a parent as an autistic adult; and the top response was like "as the (allistic) mother of an autistic child, my advice for you, the allistic parent of an autistic child is [x]"

I hate hate hate hate HATE that most of the time when I’m searching for info on autism the results always regard autistic children and are written by allistic adults for allistic parents who hate autistic children

Like I’m just going “hehe hey google do other autistic people sensory seek in carbonated drinks” and Google is like “DUMB STUPID LITTLE AUTISTIC BABIES REALLY LIKE DRINKING DUMB STUPID LITTLE AUTISTIC DRINKS LIKE SPRITE AND COKE BECAUSE THEY’RE DUMB STUPID LITTLE AUTISTIC BABIES!!!!!”

Best friend. The autistic kids you’re writing about so unkindly are going to become adults. And they’re going to be unhappy when they read that shit.

[bli-o]

hey autistic people who get overwhelmed by large groups or noise or conversation or etc etc etc you’re not evil for wanting to leave a family gathering. just so you know.

[mostly-funnytwittertweets]