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borathae · 2 years

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↳ Index [Snippet #36 - Cocoa]

“When you lick warm cocoa off of Jungkook’s body.”

Genre: Smut, domestic Fluff, married life!AU

Warnings: sweet cuddles, walking down sweet memory lane, sub!Kook, soft Dom!Reader, Good Boy!Kook, Mistress as title, sex on the sofa, nipple play, nipple sucking, food play in the form of warm cocoa, she licks it off his body, edging, oral (f.receiving), temperature play, he warms up his mouth with the cocoa & then goes down on her, pussy fingering, choking (m.receiving), ownership kink, dirty talk, some foot action where she basically traces his cock with her foot for like two seconds, subby boy tears, he is such a whiney cutie, she rides him in Lotus Position, this is lovemaking, creampies but they are clean & on birth control, snuggly aftercare

Wordcount: 7.9k

a/n: someone sent in this prompt for Kinktober and as promised, I am here to deliver. I honestly fucking love writing for them, always will. They are my comfort couple and I want them to be happy always 🧡

You had a dream ever since you were fifteen and watched a documentary about polar lights. That dream involved you, a wooden cabin somewhere in Scandinavia, lots of snow and the polar lights. You forgot about that dream for a few years as life got busy and other dreams became more important. There was one person however, who never forgot about this dream. Your best friend for life. Jimin. And if there is one thing one needs to know about Jimin, it is that he doesn’t forget dreams and that he will surprise one with a present related to that dream even almost twenty years later after you first voiced it.

And he did. Park Jimin, your brilliant and amazing and wonderful best friend, surprised you with tickets to Rovaniemi and with reservations for a cabin somewhere in deepest Lapland. It was his birthday present to you and you hugged him in tears for a solid three minutes. This was your dream since childhood, so you told him and then hugged him even tighter. And then you asked him how he even managed to plan all that to which Jungkook confessed that he helped and that "our schedules are both free around that time. I cleaned them up". You then proceeded to hug both of them and threatened them to promise you that they will never ever stop being so amazing. They both chuckled and promised that they would.

And then the time came for your trip. You and Jungkook took Bam with you, even if he was terribly nervous on the plane. Jungkook tried to calm him down with pets while you napped with your head on Jungkook's shoulder because of exhaustion (you couldn’t sleep all night from excitement and it finally caught up with you on the plane). Jimin and Yoongi also came with you, taking Holly - their dog - with them. The three of them were sleeping for most of the flight. Jimin also asked the others if they wanted to come with you, but they were all busy or already had other winter holiday plans. Taehyung and Hoseok escaped the fresh temperatures of your hometown by visiting Australia for a few weeks. While Namjoon wanted to stay back to work on his newest book and Seokjin was currently freshly in love. The two lovebirds planned to go fishing for a few days. She makes him really happy.

So it was just the four of you, which was just perfect and amazing and you were so, so happy.

Jimin and Jungkook booked two small cabins next to each other with plains of snow surrounding them and dark conifer trees in the background. A small road lead to them. The park ranger of this cabin resort drove you to them in his perfectly equipped jeep while on the radio, Finnish rap was playing. Yoongi called it "amazing music with great flow" and then proceeded to chat about the artist with the ranger for the eternity of the drive.

You sat around the open fire that night, chatting about your lives together whilst eating the best roasted food ever, courtesy of grill master Yoongi. Bam and Holly already slept that night and woke up first the next morning.

For the next few days you didn’t do much except for walking, talking, eating and sightseeing. Except for that one day where Jimin booked a reindeer sleigh ride with picnic and ice skating on a lake. That day was amazing. Or the other day you went into the nearest town to get drunk on mulled wine only to leave again after two hours because Yoongi’s social battery ran out and you didn’t want to drag him along any longer. He told you that he could go home alone, but you proceeded to insist that you guys would stick together no matter what. Yoongi smiled and blushed because of it.

You haven’t seen the Northern Lights as of yet, however. The locals here told you that stuff like that can happen and sometimes tourists are just unlucky. You really, really hope that you weren’t one of those tourists.

Jimin and Yoongi were in their cabin tonight. They wanted to be alone and you respected that. Bam was already sleeping. The poor boy is utterly confused by the constant darkness and has been sleeping for most of his time here. Except for his snow walks including major zoomies of course. He really loved those. Holly not so much. He prefers to stay inside for most of the time, napping by the heater or atop Yoongi’s discarded sweater.

You were in your thickest sweater as well, bundled up in fluffy socks and thick flannel pants. You had some milk bubbling on the stove and ingredients for the yummiest hot cocoa waiting for you.

The door to outside slides open, the freezing cold enters the little cabin instantly. In steps Jungkook, wrapped up in thick outside clothes and with a few logs of wood under his arms.

"Done?" you ask him.

"Yeah, just gotta carry them inside. It’s so freaking cold, my nose is falling off", he tells you, placing the logs in their designated basket.

"Should I help?"

"No, I’m good. I only have four more", he assures you and stomps back outside. His steps are heavy because of his boots and the distinct sound of snow clothing rubbing together accompanies them. The door stays open as Jungkook placed the logs in a heap in front of it before opening it so getting them inside would be easier.

Once done, he closes the door again. He locks it and turns to you with a cute grin on his face. You can barely see it from all the clothing covering him, but you still know what he wants. He is waiting for you to praise him, you know him that well.

"You did amazing, sweetheart. You’re honestly so cool for knowing how to chop wood", you say, watching in delight how Jungkook wiggles happily.

"Yeah sure, no biggie. That’s what your hubby's for", dismisses you nonchalantly and then hurries away to change into his inside clothes. He does so with a giddy jump in his steps.

You chuckle. He is so cute.

Jungkook returns after a few minutes. He is wearing matching bottoms and socks, but wears a different jumper than you. Light brown and just tight enough that his arms look big and sculpted. He goes to you first, wrapping his arms around you from behind and nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck as he inhales deeply.

He has his eyes closed, enjoying your presence to its fullest.

"You smell like fresh air", you tell him. You enjoy his presence too. Jungkook gives the best backhugs.

"Mhm", he hums, letting his breath tickle your neck as he finally exhales. Then he presses an adoring kiss to it, breaking away afterwards to walk to the fireplace. He begins stacking the new pieces of wood, doing so on his knees. The fire is crackling just enough that it wraps up the logs after a few seconds. He blows into the flames a few times before deciding with a nod that it was finished.

"The cabin should be warmed up soon", he says, standing up and closing the door of the oven. Then he turns, "are you still cold?"

"Yeah a little. But I’ll be better soon", you say, lifting the mugs of cocoa, "the cocoa is finished."

"Ooh, I’m so excited", he says, meeting you halfway to take his cup, "wow, you made them look so pretty. Thank you so much", he gushes.

"I hope it’s yummy. I think I put too much cinnamon", you say as you and him get comfortable on the small yet cozy couch.

Jungkook places the woolen blanket over your bodies and you snuggle into him between his legs. Your head you rest on his chest while Jungkook places his arm over your tummy protectively. He runs his fingers up and down your stomach mindlessly, sending relaxing tingles over your skin.

"There is no such thing as too much cinnamon. I bet it's amazing", he says.

"Careful it’s-"

"Ah! Ouchies! My tongue", Jungkook gasps and whines, sticking out his freshly burned tongue.

"-hot", you finish your sentence, "Googie, it’s fresh from the stove, course it’s hot. Are you okay?"

"No?" he pouts, "I burned my tongue. Look", he whines, sticking out his tongue. It is a deep pink from getting burned. You crane your neck and move in, placing a kiss atop his tongue even if that makes him move away and chuckle.

"What was that for?"

"I kissed the pain away. Duh?"

He snorts, giving you a look.

"Thanks, I guess", he snickers, taking a sip of cocoa afterwards.

"Always happy to help", you joke, relaxing back into him. You finally take a sip as well, humming contently, "that’s so yummy. You were right, the cinnamon's just right."

"I think so too. It’s really good. You make the best hot choco", he says.

"Thank you", you say and close your eyes, "this is the best, seriously."

"Yeah", he agrees and relaxes with a content sigh.

You share silence with each other. It feels nice to share silence with him. It feels natural and safe.

"You know what this holiday reminds me of?" Jungkook asks.

"Up north?"

"Yeah exactly. How did you know?"

"Because I feel the same. Everything kinda makes me think of our cottage you know? Even the architecture's the same."

"Yeah and the snow. Although I feel like the snow here is even more snowy. You know?"

"Yeah", you chuckle, "I agree. Although we had awesome winters too. Remember the Christmas party we had?"

"Yeah I do. That’s one of my happiest memories."

"Yeah?" you ask him, looking up at him.

"Mhm yeah. I had so much fun."

"Me too."

You and him exchange a kiss because the moment felt right to do so. Afterwards you relax into his chest while Jungkook goes for another sip of chocolate. There is a moment of silence and then Jungkook announces that he wanted to say something by letting out a quick "hm". You focus on his voice, but stay relaxed otherwise.

"Question time. What are your top three memories?" he asks.

"My top three memories? Like in general or with you?"

Jungkook shrugs his shoulders, "can be both. But our wedding and engagement doesn’t count."

"Why?" you grin.

"Because they’re obviously both on first place."

He makes you chuckle fondly.

"Yeah that’s true. Fine, okay let me think."

"Okay, I’ll think of mine too."

The fire crackles. The wind picks up outside. Jungkook chews on a marshmallow. You sip on your cocoa. It is really hard to decide on a memory. You could fill entire libraries with all the memories you made with him over the past decade. Difficult ones, happy ones, funny and romantic, hot and sexy, comforting and all oh so precious. Choosing only three feels impossible to do.

"Oh yeah", Jungkook breaks the comfortable silence, "and when we got Bam doesn’t count either."

"Fine god", you groan, "that would have been my first one."

"Yeah same, but let's just say that wedding, engagement and Bam are invincible."

"Okay, okay."

"Do you have yours already?" he asks.

"Gimme a moment, there's too many."

"I have one already."

"Tell me."

"That one time I was at a tattoo convention ten hours away from you and you drove all the way there because I told you that morning that I was sad", he says.

"And then I surprised you with pizza and cuddles", you say and smile, "I remember. We weren’t even engaged back then."

"That’s the night I knew I gotta ask you."

"Really?"

Jungkook nods his head, "I always knew you’d be my wife one day, but that was the night I knew knew."

"I didn’t know that. Gosh Kookie", you say and pout, "I'm gonna cry. I love you so much."

"I love you too", Jungkook grins cutely, "your turn."

"My turn", you say, cuddling into him. You run your fingers up and down his arm. It is covered in the most beautiful tattoo sleeve these days, but you remember the days when it was still empty. Jungkook always talked to you about how he will get it inked up one day and that he hopes you'll be there to witness it. You still lived in motel rooms back then, Taehyung was still an addict and you were still struggling in keeping your little gang together. So much has changed for the better since then.

"That night we danced in the restaurant. Two failed attempts at purchasing a place and then it's the one right next to your studio", you laugh in sweet memory, "we were busy renovating the ugly counter and there were still no tables in there and it was already dark outside."

"And we listened to music and then I asked you for a dance and we used the entire room for it", Jungkook smiles, burying his nose in your hair, "I remember that night. I thought you looked so beautiful."

"Beautiful? I didn't wash my hair in ten days and was sweaty as fuck."

"Didn't matter. You smiled and that’s all that mattered."

You crane your neck to look at him. His warm eyes race between yours.

"You're so fucking adorable sometimes", you whisper, reaching up to cup his cheek, "tell me another memory."

"When I taught you how to drive a bike", he says and smiles, "I remember you screaming about it being so scary but then not wanting to stop."

"I almost crashed my clumsy ass though", you say, making Jungkook snicker.

"Yeah but you didn’t and then we drove to that hill and screamed. Remember?"

"I do", you smile, "I felt so fucking free that day. I never screamed with someone before."

"Yeah me neither. It was a religious experience", he says, making you chuckle.

"Yeah really?"

"Yeah", Jungkook says in a snicker.

"Now that I'm thinking about it. Wasn’t this also the night we had raw sex for the first time?" you ask him.

"It was. You felt so fucking good", Jungkook says, "for me at least."

You turn in his arms, getting on your knees between his legs and placing your hand on his chest. Jungkook touches your hip, massaging it slowly.

"It felt amazing for me too. Maybe it’s weird but I can still remember how it felt like to have you inside me for the first time. It’s weird cause we've done it a million times since then, but that first time is still so vivid in my mind."

"I get you. I remember it too. You were so warm and so wet. I seriously wasn’t ready for how wet you were. I knew I never wanted to go back to condoms again", he says, sending heat to your cheeks.

"You were the first I ever did that with", you confess even if he already knows.

"I know. You were my first too", Jungkook whispers, eyes flitting to your lips.

Yours do the same. Your heart flutters. Your stomach tingles.

You know that feeling. That electric tension between you and him, tugging you closer and closer. It has been there since day one and has been growing ever since.

You give in to the tug. Fingers fall to the back of his neck. Eyes flutter closed.

Jungkook cups your cheek instantly, sighing into the kiss with closed eyes and a racing heart.

The tension becomes unbearable, you tug each other closer to soothe some of it. It doesn’t help, only heightening your senses to each other. Oh, sometimes you wish that you could drown in him. He is so goddamn addicting.

The kiss breaks as air becomes sparse, but you stay close, rubbing your nose against his' softly.

"Fuck baby", he whispers, lips tingling from the kiss.

"Do you have another memory?" you ask him quietly, playing with his soft hair. It’s gotten so long again. You witnessed so many of his hairstyles, as he did yours and each time you thought that it was the best one he ever had. And you were right each and every time because Jungkook is the most handsome in every hairstyle. He thinks the same about you.

"I forgot everything", he whispers, chasing your lips with a tilt of his head, "kiss me again, please."

"The cocoa."

"Put them on the table."

You do. The table's not far away. You can reach it from your position. Jungkook holds your hips as support. He runs his hands up your sides once you return, stopping at your neck to pull you close.

Your lips meet, your fingers tighten on the other, moans leave the both of you. It feels so good to kiss. Talking about your past always leaves you feeling so goddamn much for him. Tonight is no different. Warm and cozy with snowfall outside and a fire burning inside, you feel even more for him.

"I'm so attracted to you", you whisper between kisses, making him chuckle softly.

"Me too baby, you drive me crazy", he breathes, "kiss me again, please."

"Kookie", you sigh, falling back into the kiss.

Fingers tangle in his soft hair. His do the same. Your chests touch as you press yourself against him, Jungkook groans in reaction.

"Can't you take your shirt off? Please?" he asks.

"Already?" you chuckle, "this wins quickest time you got horny."

"Hey", he pouts at you, "I'm not horny, I just wanna have your titties against mine."

"And that’s not horny?"

"Not yet at least."

You snort and chuckle.

"Fine doofus, I’m taking my shirt off if you’re doing it too."

"Already on it", he says, soon disappearing in the sweater as he takes it off.

You use the moment to take off your own, throwing it on the floor in sync with Jungkook.

Your eyes run over his body. His' do the same.

"You're so fucking beautiful", Jungkook says, shimmying on the couch needily, "your body's fucking perfect, seriously."

"Yours too. I seriously can’t get enough of it, baby", you say, seeking his closeness by scooting closer again.

"Ah. My cock, careful", he squeaks, having the honor of getting your knee to press against it harshly on your desperate attempt of kissing him again.

"Sorry, you okay?" you mumble, lips trailing kisses to his neck as apology, "sorry booboo. So sorry."

Jungkook tilts his head back, eyes closed and lips parting in a moan.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah…really okay", he sighs, "that’s amazing…"

You moan softly, sucking a hickey to his neck.

"Baby you're gon' make me horny if you do that", he whispers.

You snicker, lifting your head.

Jungkook peels one eye open, meeting your amused look.

"What?" he whines, opening both eyes and lifting his head, "I'm just saying, my neck's sensitive. And you're sexy, I can’t help it."

"You're so adorable", you chuckle and then reach for one of the cocoa mugs.

Jungkook watches you with curious eyes. You take a sip first, nodding your head in agreement.

"Why are you drinking choco right now?" he asks.

"I have an idea."

"Okay?"

You put your finger into the cocoa. It isn’t hot anymore, just very warm. It feels comfortable around your finger.

"What are you doing?" he asks, watching you stir your finger in the cocoa.

"I wanna try something. Relax, it'll feel good", you say, meeting his gaze, "do you trust me, Kookie?"

"Yeah, I trust you", he says, eyes following your finger.

You pull it out and guide it to his nipple. Jungkook gasps with the first contact, back arching into your touch and eyelids fluttering.

"That's so warm", he rasps, fingers squeezing the cushion once.

"Yeah? Do you like it?" you ask him, rolling your finger over his nipple slowly.

"Yeah, a lot."

You pull back, eyes racing over his chocolate covered nipple. There is a droplet of cocoa covering the silver ball of his piercing. You place your hand on his chest and lower yourself, tongue darting out to lick it off.

"Darling", Jungkook gasps, chest lifting in a deep breath, "oh god", he exhales, chest sinking again and hips squirming on the cushion.

He tastes so good. Like chocolate and slightly like metal and most of all like Jungkook. You suck his nipple between your lips, flicking your tongue over it quickly.

Jungkook laughs breathily, right hand coming to rest on the back of your head and thighs trying to squeeze together. He fails, obviously, and ends up squeezing you with them. That doesn’t stop him from continuing. He keeps rubbing his thighs against your body as his nipple tingles in pleasure.

You release him with a slurp, lifting your head even if that makes his hand slip to the back of your neck. You lick your lips for his viewing pleasure, giving him a flirty smirk afterwards.

"And?" you ask him, "how's that for an idea?"

"A million outta ten, please don’t stop", he says, chasing you with an arch of his back.

"That's my boy. I love this, darling", you say, dunking your finger back into the warm cocoa. You wiggle it a few times to really coat it, then pull it out. You connect it with the same nipple again, rubbing slow circles on it and listening to Jungkook’s blissed sigh.

You plan on getting this nipple sensitive to the point of Jungkook wanting to orgasm and only then you plan on moving on to the other side. Knowing Jungkook and his incredibly sensitive nipples, it sadly won’t take long, but you don’t mind. You just have to drag out the play. You’re good at that shit.

You flick your tongue over his chocolaty nipple, holding him right under his armpit. Jungkook moans oh so sweetly, heavy eyes glued to your face and tummy tensing in pleasure.

"So yummy", you whisper, lifting yourself again for another round of cocoa. You know that Jungkook expected you to suck his nipple like you did before, but you like to keep him on edge. Dragging out the play, remember? Your sweet man will learn soon enough what he'll get from being such a dream.

Jungkook gasps loudly with the third round of hot chocolate, hand slipping from your neck to hold your waist instead.

"Baby, it feels so good", he squeaks out, making you lift your gaze to meet his droopy eyes.

He looks so fucked. Eyelids barely open, cheeks flushed and lips parted in quick pants.

"Yeah? It’s nice that it’s a little hot, isn’t it?" you ask him, taking his nipple between your thumb and pointer finger to roll it slowly.

"Yeah", he squeaks, chasing you desperately, "oh god, baby."

"Mhm, such a good boy", you praise, lowering your mouth to his swollen nipple. You keep it pinched between your fingers, flicking your tongue over the very tip of it.

Jungkook tilts his head back and moans, thighs squeezing you oh so desperately and fingers digging into your softness.

"Good boy, you’re so sensitive", you coo, giving his nipple a little kiss before lifting yourself again.

Jungkook is desperate, looking at you with a pout. One you ignore to cover your finger again and then rub his nipple with it. You manage to accidentally put too much, resulting in the hot chocolate to run down his pec. It stops around three inches below his nipple in a small, round droplet.

"Oops, put too much", you say in a chuckle.

"Hah", Jungkook retorts the laugh, sounding completely and utterly out of breath doing it. He most definitely did not hear what you just told him. He only laughed because you did. This man is not thinking anything, except that his nipple feels sensitive.

You connect your tongue with the droplet, dragging it up his strong pec to clean off everything. Once you reach his nipple, you slow down, pressing the flat of your tongue against it to grind. It moves his piercing under your tongue, makes his nipple swell and causes Jungkook to moan squeakily.

To make matters even more difficult for him, you decide that it was finally time for you to take him back between your lips. You suck on his nipple, basking in the whole body squirm it forces out of him.

"I wanna cum", he croaks, arching his back repeatedly while his thighs almost crush you from pressing together desperately.

You purr, sending vibrations through his nipple.

"Please", Jungkook begs, head hitting the armrest of the couch and hips bucking up against your tummy. His cock is rock hard.

"Mhhm", you moan and slip off, placing your hand right under his nipple and watching in delight as Jungkook squirms in desperation.

"You're so cute", you laugh, making him whine oh so desperately.

"Why did you do that?" he whimpers, hand coming to touch his own nipple, "oh god I wanna- ah!"

You just slapped his hand away. Hard and demanding. Jungkook peels his eyes open, gawking at you with parted lips.

"No touching. That’s my job", you order with furrowed brows, "understood?"

"Y-yes ma'am", Jungkook stutters, nodding his head vigorously.

"Good boy", you say, giving him a smile, "you're so adorable."

You put your finger back into the cocoa, coating it thoroughly before connecting it with his other nipple. It is finally time.

Jungkook moans and closes his eyes again, head falling back against the armrest and hands coming to hold your waist.

"That's nice isn’t it?" you coo, wrapping your lips around him afterwards to suck off the cocoa.

"Don't stop", he sighs as an answer, feeling a constant stream of warm pleasure run through his body. If you were to touch his cock right now, he would orgasm instantly. He feels so fucking charged. His nipples are so goddamn sensitive. The cocoa is so warm, your touch so skilled, your mouth so wet. Jungkook swears that he will actually pass out from how good it feels.

You lift your mouth again, blowing on his wet nipple. Goosebumps cover his skin instantly, a shiver runs down his spine. He arches his back, squeezing your hips between his thighs. The air feels so cold.

"Pretty. You look so pretty", you praise, sparkly eyes glued to his hard nipple. It’s so fascinating just how reactive it is to whatever you do to it.

You connect your newly covered finger with it, forcing a shaky sigh and a little whimper out of him. He pulls his brows into a deep frown, pouts to the point where his lower lip trembles, then parts them in another whimper.

"That feels so good, doesn’t it?" you taunt in a lowered voice.

"Yeah", he keens, nodding his head vigorously.

"Of course it does", you whisper, lifting your finger again. You place your hand right under his armpit again and lower your head. With puckered lips, you blow again, basking in the desperate squirm he does because of it.

Jungkook feels charged. He has always been a sucker for different temperatures. Ice cubes on his tummy, hot wax on his skin, warm lips around his cock, cold water between your heated bodies. He's always fucking loved how temperatures make him feel. But to have warm cocoa followed by cold air on his nipples almost makes him want to cry.

"This is so much", he groans, throwing his head back to the point where you can watch his throat move as he moans.

"Yeah? Just say the word and I'll stop", you say.

"Don't stop", he begs in a squeaky keen, "pwease bwaby."

You snicker, "I see baby voice is the right option here", you say, rewarding his cute butt by covering him in a new layer of warm cocoa.

"Oh god, seriously", he moans, arching his back, "it's so fucking good."

You flick your finger then lower yourself. His nipple is so swollen between your lips, feeling oh so hot against your tongue. You moan deliciously, sucking on it while your tongue dances around his piercing.

"Can I cum?" Jungkook begs, "pwease just a liddol?"

You snort, lifting your head again.

"First of all, baby talk is not gonna work on me and second of all, how are you planning on cumming just a little?"

"Just like once, like pew", he thrusts his hips once, "like a gunshot."

You laugh, "no?" you say.

"Please?" he pouts.

"No."

You wipe off his cute pout instantly by connecting your fingers with his other nipple for a change. Still charged from before, your touch sends the hottest pleasure through his body.

Jungkook closes his eyes and tilts his head back, moaning unapologetically.

"You're seriously so adorable, Kookie", you say, covering him in new cocoa, "even if you talk complete shit sometimes."

"Hey, I'm not- ah", Jungkook forgets what he wanted to say, shivering deeply as you flick your tongue against his nipple to clean off the cocoa.

"What's wrong?" you taunt.

"Seriously please", he whines, "why are you stopping again?"

You rub his other nipple, watching how he tenses his tummy and chases you with a thrust. His cock is so hard, stretching the fabric of his sweats to its limits. You lower the mug to the very tip of his clothed cock. The temperature is low enough that it won’t burn him, but still high enough that he will feel the change in temperature.

"Mistress", the pet name slips from his lips in a squeaky keen, followed by a shaky moan.

You draw circles on his tip with the bottom of the mug, rolling his nipple between your fingers as you do.

"Your cock’s so hard, Kookie", you coo.

"Gonna cum", he confesses in a barely there whisper, "please Mistress."

"Too bad", you rasp, lifting with your hand and the mug, "I wanted to play longer."

"Oh my god, can I please cum?" he whines loudly, looking at you with glassy eyes, "why are you edging me? I didn't do anything."

"Yeah you did."

"What? No I didn’t."

"First of all, manners. Brat. And second of all, you are the cutest man in existence, that’s enough."

"Please baby", he laughs desperately, "just wanna cum, please."

"Not yet. Get naked first."

Jungkook follows instantly. He scurries off the couch to take off his sweats and briefs. You do the same when he isn’t looking. Jungkook turns, eyes widening upon seeing your naked body.

"Holy fuck", he whispers, cock twitching from the view.

"Do you like it?" you ask him, sitting back down.

Jungkook falls to his knees before you, pressing himself against your shins while his hands come to hold your hips.

"I'm your slut. Seriously", he croaks, hard cock rubbing against your skin and eyes watering in desperation.

You giggle, "you're so cute", you gush, "why are you so cute, Googie?"

"Why are you so perfect?" he throws back, burying his face between your thighs. He groans, moving his head left and right as he nuzzles you deeply, "baby you are so perfect. Why?" he whines into you, making you giggle happily.

"Cute", you say, reaching down to ruffle his hair.

Jungkook lifts his head, gazing at you in complete and utter awe.

"Can I eat your pussy?" he begs.

"Ask me properly and you can", you say.

"Can I please eat you out, Mistress?"

"There we go. Yes, you can", you say, propping your feet up on the couch.

"Fuck", Jungkook hisses, eyes running over your exposed pussy, "you're so beautiful. Holy shit."

"Can you see how wet you make me? Mhm?" you taunt, wiggling your hips.

"Yeah…holy fuck I wanna taste you so bad", he croaks.

"I'm not stopping you."

Jungkook however turns to get one of the cocoa mugs. He lifts it to his lips and takes a gracious sip, swirling the liquid in his mouth for a few seconds before swallowing it.

You watch with a racing heart. You know exactly what he is doing.

Jungkook closes the distance between his mouth and your pussy. He connects his tongue with you, grinding it up and down your soaked folds. He is looking up at you, wanting to see your reaction. The cocoa warmed him up which results in his normally already warm mouth to feel a hundred times hotter on your pussy.

You chase him with a roll of your hips, fingers gripping the edge of the sofa.

He lifts his mouth, licking his lips.

"How was that?" he asks.

"Amazing."

"Did you feel the difference?"

You nod your head, "do it again."

Jungkook nods his head and takes another sip. He swirls it around for a bit and swallows it. Then he lowers his hot lips to your clit, eyes glued to it with hunger burning in them. He sucks on it, swirling his hot tongue over it. Just the tip. He makes sure to trace the parts which are the most sensitive.

"Fuck baby", you sigh, tilting your head back in bliss, "that’s so good. Don’t stop."

"It's so good. You taste so good", Jungkook says, covering his mouth in new warmth to pleasure your clit with it. Slow licks, fast swirls and needy sucks. He makes the very best out of the few moments where his mouth feels like fire on your sensitive pussy.

"Baby…" you sigh. You love it so much when he plays with temperature. There was this one time where he licked an ice cube before sucking on your nipples. The way you shivered because of it is still haunting you. Another time he used hot wax to cover your entire body. He was so rough that night. You still have weak knees because of it. And now this. Mouth hot and oh so wet because of the cocoa. Fuck, Jungkook feels like fucking heaven.

He moans softly and lifts his mouth again, caressing your thighs when this makes you squirm desperately. He knows that he edged you, but he had to stop. His mouth wasn’t hot enough anymore.

"That's so good", he croaks, taking a sip of the cocoa. The mug is empty and so he discards it on the coffee table before finally swallowing the liquid and lowering his skilled mouth to your pussy, "is good", he lulls, guiding his tongue through your folds until he reaches your clit, “so good...”

"Keep going…"

Jungkook places his strong hands on your hips, moaning around your clit in a sweet promise that he won’t ever stop. His cock aches for release and his nipples still feel on fire, but that doesn’t stop him from giving you his all. You always make him feel so fucking good for no apparent reason and he wants to give back. You deserve to feel as best as you can because of how giddy you make him feel.

He comes up for air, making up for the loss of sensations by rubbing your clit with two of his fingers. He places kisses on your inner thighs, eyes closed in bliss.

You writhe because of the change in sensation, “good boy, my good boy”, you sigh.

Jungkook kisses his way back to your pussy. He keeps his fingers on your entrance, massaging it in circular motions and with just enough pressure to make you feel electric. And while he does that, he connects his tongue with your clit, licking her in upwards motions.

“Kookie baby”, you croak, lifting your head to look down at him. Your eyes are droopy and half-lidded, your lips are parted in shaky moans. His eyes are closed, giving his pretty face such a tranquil look to it.

Seeing how pretty he looks when he is between your legs, makes the sensations he gives you a hundred times more intense. You reach down, running your fingers through his incredibly soft hair. He whimpers because of it, pressing himself closer. His fingers slip inside to his very first knuckle, giving you such a nice stretch.

“Kookie”, you moan happily, tugging on his hair as gently as possible. He opens his eyes, flustering in a squirm when he realises that you are looking at him.

"You're doing such a good job", you lull, giving him a drunken smile.

Jungkook mewls and sucks on your clit before lifting his head, “you taste so good”, he says with his lips all puffy and wet.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

You smile, running your hand down to his cheek, “you’re so cute”, you whisper, tilting his head up just enough that you can trace his lips.

Jungkook chases your thumb, sucking on its tip before you pull away again. He mewls, making you smile because of how cute he is.

“My hubby”, you breathe, taking his chin between two of your fingers, “you’re so pretty, like seriously.”

"___", he croaks, "you literally own me. No fucking joke. You own me", he adds, making you smile.

"Come here", you order.

Jungkook lifts himself. He begins moving his fingers on your pussy again and straightens up until he is face to face with you.

"Closer."

Jungkook obeys.

You purr, placing your hand around his throat.

"Mistress“, he whimpers, gulping heavily and fingers stuttering on your clit.

"Say it again", you order in a rasp.

"Mistress", he mewls.

"Nono. The thing before that."

"You fucking own me", he croaks and gulps when that makes you smirk.

"Yeah I do", you rasp, "fuck baby, keep doing that. Love how you touch me."

"I wanna fucking cum", he whines, "this is so hot."

“Yeah? You love touching my pussy, don’t you?”

“Yeah love making you feel good”, he mewls, eyelids fluttering in bliss when you press down on his veins as a little reward, “Mistress” he moans breathily, “ugn god”, he gets out, gulping under your harsh grip and tilting his head back just enough that you can see more of his throat.

“Kookie your fingers. Keep them moving.”

“Sorry”, he lulls, fixing his faltering rhythm, “sorry ‘s so hard. Feels so good.”

“I know baby, but it’s not that hard. Make me feel good and I’ll make you feel good in return, yeah?”

Jungkook nods his head and whimpers, squeezing his eyes shut, “Mistress”, he gets out. He draws circles on your clit, adding soft massages back and forth every now and then. He parts your folds as he does, massaging your entrance before returning to your clit again.

“There you go. That’s my boy”, you praise him, running your hand up his tummy and chest, “such a good boy, keep going”, you add in a sweet moan, placing your fingers on his left nipple.

“That’s unfair, please don’t do that”, he whines, looking at you with glassy eyes, “please don’t do that”, he whispers.

“Why not? You make me feel good, so I do it to you too”, you taunt, pinching and rolling his terribly sensitive nipple.

“Wan’…cum”, he breathes, arching his back, “plea…”

“And how’s that my problem?”

“Please. Is really, really hard”, he lulls.

You sneak a glance at his cock. Tip all heated and wet and veins throbbing in desperation. You feel your pussy clench because of it. His touch feels like paradise because of it, sending constant bolts of warmth through your body.

“I can see that”, you tease, placing your foot on his cock to rub it, “you’re so hard, baby.”

“Please Mistress”, he begs.

You grind your foot into his cockhead, eliciting a squeaky moan from him. He flinches with his entire body, hips chasing the pressure shakily.

“Cute”, you giggle, “you’re so cute”, you say, running your foot down his shaft.

“I’m begging you”, he croaks, spilling tears onto your hand still around his throat. They hit your skin in two droplets of warmth, leaving behind a cool shiver.

“Don’t cry babyboy”, you coo, “come sit on the couch, lemme take care of you.”

Jungkook does so with wobbly knees, pulling his legs up on the couch to cross them. He makes grabby hands at you, pouting oh so sadly. You climb atop his crossed legs, laughing when Jungkook tugs you closer roughly the second you were on top of him. His hands grab your butt, his glassy eyes race over your face.

“I’m dizzy”, he keens, “it’s your fault.”

You grab his cheeks between your fingers and move in closer, “good”, you whisper, kissing him afterwards.

Jungkook moans, wrapping his arms around your waist to press you closer. You chase him with a smooth roll of your hips. Your tummy presses against his', your pussy grinds against his cock.

“Fuck”, he whimpers into the kiss, deepening his hug to the point where you wonder if he wanted to crush you. He dances his hands up and down your sides as he cradles you, sending the nicest shivers down your spine. His skin is heated, melting right against yours.

Your clit is so sensitive. Grinding against his cock is making you want to crumble into a million pieces. You lift yourself a little more so you can grind your entrance against him too.

“Please”, he begs, right hand dancing over your butt just to disappear between your legs. He presses his fingers against your wetness to massage you slowly, brushing against his frenulum as he does.

“Please what?” you ask him with your voice shaking just slightly.

“Sink down please.”

“Like that?” you ask him, sinking down just enough that his tip breaches you. You lift yourself again afterwards. "Like that, mhm?",

“No. More”, he whines, “please.”

“You’re so cute”, you giggle, lowering yourself again.

Jungkook moves, pushing his cock into you with his fingers wrapped around it and his thumb pressed against your hole. He makes you shiver and twist his hair at the back of his head.

“Shit. Kook”, you get out.

Jungkook tilts his head back, lips brushing against yours and eyes opening slowly. They stay half-lidded, racing between your hazy ones. Then he smiles. Completely and utterly droopy, but filled with so much adoration.

You retort it, abandoning his hair to instead cup his heated cheeks. He moves your hips, thumb rolling slow circles on your hole as he does.

“Baby”, you moan, “holy fuck, my baby”, you croak, pulling him into a sloppy kiss.

Jungkook kisses you back, wrapping his arms around your upper back in synch with you finally bottoming out. Like this his pierced nipples are rubbing against your chest and his tummy grinds on your clit with each movement.

“Baby”, the kiss breaks because you needed to gasp, “holy fuck, Kook.”

“Yeah”, he rasps, placing his hand at the back of your head as he tightens his hug, “please don’t stop.”

“Don’t wanna stop”, you say, rocking your hips on him in a slow rhythm. You twist his hair again, “now fucking kiss me like you mean it.”

Jungkook kisses you deeply, moaning against your lips as your tongues dance with each other and your bodies connect in slow movements. He has no idea how he is still able to hold back. His cock feels like its on the most amazing fire ever. His nipples are pulsating in sensitivity, grinding against you over and over again. All he can think about is letting go and filling you up. And still he hasn’t yet. He seriously has no idea how he is doing that. It feels so good to be with you. To have you sit in his lap and rock your hips on him as you kiss him. Jungkook whimpers, cradling you against his body. You are so warm and soft. He wants to merge with you. You are so warm and soft.

“Oh god”, he lets out and sobs softly, “my darling”, he whimpers, cupping your cheek with his left hand while his right hand feels up your side as he hugs you oh so tightly.

“I know darling, I know. I feel it too”, you sigh, “your cock’s so perfect. ‘s making me feel so good.”

Jungkook sobs, pulling your forehead against yours.

“Don’t cry”, you whisper, wiping his tears away.

“I love you”, he croaks and squeaks, “oh god I, I love y-you”, he stutters, thrusting into you as best as the position allows him too.

Warmth fills you up and drips out of you instantly.

“Are you-“

“Yeah”, he interrupts you, shaking under you, “oh god, oh god, oh god. ___”, he sobs and begins chanting your name, squeezing you against him as he fills you up with his high. He is shaking so much and tensing his stomach, rubbing your clit right against it.

You squeeze your eyes shut, dropping your head against him. He is holding you, hugging you, cradling you. While his cock is filling you up. Holy fuck this is too good.

“Kookie, you’re making me cum”, you whimper, crumbling into a million pieces afterwards. You meet him in sloppy bounces on his cock, chasing the friction his tummy gives you and riding on the fiery pleasure of his cock.

Jungkook holds you through your shakes, feeling dizzy in happiness. This is his heaven. He is in paradise. Your pussy is so warm and tight, now filled with his cum. Jungkook swears that he doesn’t know a better sensation than this right now.

You come down with a shudder, dropping against him in a huff of air. Jungkook buries his face in the crook of your neck instantly, sucking the gentlest of hickeys to your skin. It tingles so nicely, making you feel so good as you float on your afterglow.

You don’t slip off, keeping him inside just to keep that deep warmth going for longer. Jungkook loves that you do. He feels so goddamn complete when he is with you like that.

“How was that?” he asks you.

“Like heaven?” you say and giggle, making him giggle too, “for you?”

“Same”, he giggles, giving your waist a little squeeze, “I’m so dizzy now.”

“Yeah same”, you squeeze him, “and a little cold.”

“Wanna share a blanky?” he asks.

“Yeah, let’s share a blanket”, you agree, reaching to your side to grab the blanket which very convinietly lies right there.

You throw it over your shoulder and with Jungkook’s help tug it behind his back so the two of you are all cocooned in. You lean into his chest with a content sigh, closing your eyes when he places a loving kiss on the tip of your nose.

“This was amazing”, he says.

“Yeah”, you agree, rubbing the tip of your nose against his cheek, “you smell so good”, you whisper.

“You too, baby”, he says.

Bang!

You and Jungkook scream up at the sudden loud bang against your window. And scream up again when a distorted figure presses its head against the glass. Jimin. His features may be hidden in darkness and foggy glass, but it’s him. You’d recognize him anywhere.

“Are you guys finally done?” he screams, nose squished against the window, “hellooo can you hear me?” he coos loudly.

“What the hell? Did he watch us fuck?” you mumble, snuggling closer to Jungkook to hide away. Not that you feel any kind of shame in being naked in front of Jimin. That man once waxed your butthole when you wanted to try it out (you hated it. It hurt like hell).

“What are you doing, man?” Jungkook calls out, still clutching you safely to your chest from getting scared before.

“Come outside you two lovebirds. The polar lights are out!” Jimin tells you, knocking on the glass again, “helloo???”

“Oh my god the polar lights”, you gasp, looking at Jungkook.

His eyes are widened in surprise, “we gotta go outside, darling”, he says.

“Yes, oh my god I can’t believe this is happening”, you squeal and hit his chest softly, “we’re coming Jimin! Wait for us!”

“Oh heard me? Nice”, Jimin’s grin is distorted by the glass, “get dressed, we’re waiting for you!”

885 notes · View notes

batcadillac · 19 days

Text

Apparently I haven't introduced you guys to Riptide yet?? (Ofcourse I have like 25 OCs and haven't posted shit about most of them)

I'm not fully happy about the drawing but I am about his design.

More info about him underneath the cut.

**Ghoul information Card**

**General information**

Name: Riptide aka Rip

Pronouns: He/Him

Species: Ghoul

Element: Water

Sexuality: Demi/Pan

Period of arrival at Abbey: End Papa IV

Age: 178

Birthday: June 29

Zodiac: Cancer

Nationality/Origin: Australia

Part of the Pit: 2nd circle.

Languages/accents: Australian, Ghoulish, Infernal

Believes/religion: Satanist and worshipper of Leviathan

Occupation: Cook

Hobbies: Cooking, Fishing (specially catfish), Listening to music, playing electric guitar, games (from poker to videogames), swimming, going to the gym once in a while.

Specific Elemental powers: Fast swimmer, can hold water in his stomach and spit it out with quite a bit of force (waterblast), Camouflage himself, Can lure fish, Can communicate a little bit with large water mammals and sharks. Can stay underwater for unlimited time (2 sets of lungs)

Special abilities/skills: 2nd row of teeth (are slightly smaller than his front ones so not visible when he smiles, but are sharper to hold on prey)

Music taste: Death core, heavy metal, death metal, anything that sounds good to him.

Favourite food: Sushi, pokebowls and chicken parmi

Favourite drinks: Ginger beer and any soda really. (he enjoys the frizzy texture)

**Appearance**

Height: 193m

Hair color: Black and blue

Eye color: Blue and red

Skin color: Dark grey/black and white/light grey.

Spade shape: (still to be designed, but probably a bigger/thicker tail)

Special features: Fins on his arms, back (can fold down and are flexible), legs and ears. His "goatie" is also a fin.

Scars/marks: Scars on his arms from protecting his half sibling in the pit during a moon event.

Tattoo/Piercings/body mods: Septum, snakebites, tragus (both ears)

Accommodations/medical equipment: His skin/scales needs to be hydrated often or it cracks (doesn't have a mucus layer like it should), so carries a lotion, sunscreen and water bottle with him at work or if he goes out. His skin and scales are sensitive in general and can start to flake if not taken care off.

Scent: cocoa butter, coconut oil and a hint of jasmine

Clothing style: All his clothes are mostly black and wears bandshirts mostly.

Voiceclaim: nats whats i reckon

Other: He looks intimidating but is actually a cinnamon roll. Loves making people happy with his food, very protective.

#ghoul oc #nameless ghoul oc #ghost oc #the band ghost oc #riptide ghoul #Ghoul OC Riptide

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chickensarentcheap · 5 months

Text

In a Heartbeat- Chapter 7

Fandom: Extraction

PAIRING: TYLER RAKE AND ESME DRUMMOND (ESTABLISHED OFC. YOU DO NOT NEED TO READ THE OTHER STORIES TO UNDERSTAND THIS ONE)

SUMMARY: Dhaka nearly ended everything before it even began. In it’s aftermath and with Tyler’s life teetering on the threshold between life and death, Esme is about to realize just how strong she can be. And that love happens when it happens. There’s no rules. No rhyme or reason. No timeline.

WARNINGS: profanity, very brief mentions of spousal abuse and rape

TAGGING: @tragiclyhip @youflickedtooharddamnit @secretaryunpaid @thebejeweledwatercat @munstysmind

@asirensrage @residentdormouse @kmc1989 @karimac @arrthurpendragon

@fanficanatic-tw @ocappreciationtag @occommunity @ninjasawakenedmystar

@alisbackalleybbq

My tag list Is OPEN. Please just ask if you'd like to be added :)

Link to Ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/48691714/chapters/141050257

***

Esme lingers on the threshold between the living room and kitchen; perched on the edge of the dining table, a mug of hot chocolate clutched in both hands. Nursing her drink as she watches him sleep; sprawled out on the couch, a lightly snoring Lucy curled up at his feet and two newly acquired chickens snoozing between him and the back of the sofa: his battered, still healing body and his traumatized, haunted mind at rest. Feet peeking out from the bottom of the plaid blanket covering him and the hood of his sweatshirt pulled over his head; those large, strong hands -with their various scars and calluses- folded together and resting on his chest. Worn out from the day and desperately needing a late afternoon nap; pushing himself past the point of exhaustion in his first full day out of the hospital. Attempting to make up for lost time; stubbornly refusing to cut the day short, or even to take short breaks to rest and catch his breath.

She already knows him so well; fully aware of his reluctance to accept his limitations and the worry he harbours that he’s somehow ‘letting her down’. Afraid -despite the months of devotion she’d already shown by remaining by his side in the hospital, that her continued care of her would soon become taxing; burdened by the task of helping nurse him back to health both physically AND mentally. Despising the mere notion of appearing weak in front of her; he’d turned down all suggestions to sit and rest; ignoring the reminders that they had lots of time left together. There was no rush; there were many more hours -days, weeks, months, YEARS- ahead to enjoy the fresh and get ‘out and about’.

The first hour they’d spent wandering the outdoor market; picking out produce and eggs, various baked goods and freshly cut meats. Afterwards, they indulged in a filling lunch at one of the smaller restaurants. Tucked into a booth at the back of the quaint establishment; engaging in small talk interspersed with sexual innuendos and flirtatious comments while sipping lattes and cappuccinos, and sampling various Austrian foods and desserts. Ending the day by finding a home furnishing store and ordering the first items to personalize their house; a bigger fridge, a stove, a mixer for her baking and new pots and pans. Everything she’d need to make cakes, cookies, pies and other desserts. A brand new -and much more comfortable- bed, dressers, a desk and bookshelf.

They’d only returned to the cabin once a list was made of the other ‘wants and needs’; workout equipment, new laptops, a larger TV. Paint for the both master bath and the much smaller, main washroom, cupboards and countertops for the kitchen. While unsure of how long the Gmunden would be home, they’re determined to make their surroundings as cheerful and livable as possible; planning on keeping the place a ‘getaway’ when it was time to move on to something bigger. Whether it be in Australia or one of the half dozen European cities that had made a ‘shortlist’. Prague, Paris, Zurich, Amsterdam, Copenhagen.

She shivers; a chill setting in as the nearby fire begins to die. Setting her mug on the cluttered dining table, she moves towards the fireplace; adding a handful of dry wood and then using the poker to stoke it ‘alive’. She holds her hands out towards the flames, warming both front and back and rubbing vigorously at her upper arms. And when she hears a dull thud and glances over her shoulder; Lucy’s ears immediately perking up, dark eyes widening, head raising out of curiosity. Tyler’s bad leg -brace and all- now hanging over the side of the couch, foot on the floor as he continues to sleep.

Esme pads towards him; carefully picking up his leg and placing it back on the couch. Peeling the throw away from his body, she stretches it out; tucking it tightly around his sides, under both legs and over his feet. And when she attempts to step away, he grabs ahold of her wrist and pulls her closer; fingers gliding over the top of her hand before pushing their way through hers.

His eyes remain closed. Voice -heavy with sleep- resonating deep in his chest. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. Everything’s fine.”

“What’re you doing?”

“Babying you.”

Tyler scowls.

“I was making sure you were comfortable. Your bad leg was hanging off the couch; if I left it like that, you’d wake up in a world of hurt. Not to mention your big ass feet were poking out of the blanket. Don’t want you catching a cold.”

“My feet aren’t that big.”

“Your feet are massive, okay. You can house a family of four in each of your shoes.”

“Maybe your feet are just abnormally small. Like the rest of you.”

“You know, you’re lucky you’re cute. Especially when you're sleepy. You’re extra pouty when you’re sleepy.”

“I do NOT pout.”

“You most certainly do.”

He presses the heel of his palm into one eye, followed by the other, then squints up at her. “Everything alright? You okay?”

“Why wouldn’t I be? Did something happen? You have a dream where I got hurt or something? Not one of those Dhaka dreams, was it? Gaspar getting a hold of me and taking me to Asif and…”

“No. Thank god. I don’t want to go through that again. Even if it isn’t real. There was no dream. I guess you’re just beginning to rub off on me. I’m starting to worry all the time now.”

“There’s nothing for you to worry about. I’m fine. Everything’s good.” Leaning over the couch, she presses a chaste kiss to his lips. “Everything’s very good, actually.”

“Yeah…” As a slow grin spreads across his face, he reaches up to loop wayward strands of hair behind her ears. “...it is.”

“Try and get a little more sleep, alright? You overdid it, today. And I don’t want you to be paying the price tomorrow.”

“Something tells me that’s inevitable.”

“You need to know your limitations. And be okay with them. Slow and steady wins the race, right? I don’t want you pushing it and getting hurt. Pace yourself, babe. That’s the only way you’ll get back to a hundred percent.”

“I was never there to begin with.”

“Well, with all the repairing and fine-tuning they did in Dubai, you’ll probably end up being in even better shape than before. But that’s a long way away. And that’s perfectly fine. You know that, right? That you don’t have to rush things.”

“I just want to be who you need me to be. Who you deserve. I just want to make you happy.”

“You know what makes me happy? You taking care of yourself. And letting me help along the way. THAT’S what makes me happy.”

A grin tugs at the corners of his mouth. “Not just me in general?”

“I think that goes without saying. Now…” Pulling the throw up to his chin, she tucks it around his body and then combs her fingers through his hair. Lips warm and soft as they meet his brow. “...you get a little more sleep and I’ll figure something out for dinner.”

“Will it be edible?”

Smirking, she flicks the tip of his nose with her thumb and forefinger. “Fuck you, Tyler.”

Chuckling, he grabs hold of her sweatshirt and pulls her downwards. An arm circling her waist when she loses her balance; giving a small shriek of surprise and then giggling when she lands on top of him. He settles one palm in the middle of her spine and cradles the back of her with the other; fingers pushing through her hair and softly massaging her scalp.

Neither speak again. And she finds herself quickly and easily relaxed by the warmth radiating off his body, the sound of his heart beating within his chest, and the familiar smell that clings to his skin and clothes. She feels content and secure. Adored. Protected. And she basks in the moment. Enjoying the contact; remaining where she is until his breathing slows and softens and his arms fall limp at his sides.

*****

She takes Lucy for her nighttime walk while dinner finishes; soup simmering on the hot plate, a salad waiting in the fridge, garlic loaves keeping warm in the toaster oven. Bundled up in boots and parka, knit beanie and mittens, she trudges through the snow and down to the dock; enjoying the cold, crisp air and the blanket of stars that shimmer within a black velvet sky. She feels free for the first time in a LONG time; able to breathe without the fear of either the past or present breathing down her neck. At last content in her own skin and comfortable and relaxed in her surroundings. Finally able to shed the last of her baggage; the mountains of bad decisions, the trauma left behind from time with an unstable and horrifically abusive man, a child and teenagehood spent walking on eggshells. She had devoted years to driving herself to the brink of both mental and physical exhaustion; weary and worn trying to win the love and respect of the woman who’d given birth to her, but had hated her from the moment she took her first breath.

It seems easier to deal with now. The memories of cruel words and vicious hands, the agony of the wounds inflicted both internally and externally. She has a safe place to fall; someone she trusts with both life and heart. Who wants nothing more than to make her happy and keep her safe, secure, and protected.

Someone who will stop at nothing to make those things a reality.

For once in her life, love doesn’t hurt. It’s patience and it’s sacrifice. It’s caring more about your partner than you do about yourself. It’s feeling happy whenever they’re in the same room as you; enjoying the sound of their voice and laugh, their touch and the taste of their kiss. Never able to get enough of them; the conversations and the feel of their hand in yours. And the way your body not only easily melts into theirs, but is also capable of eagerly and hungrily responding.

They’re halfway back to the cabin when she sees the lights flicker on; followed by the TV and Tyler’s form passing by the living room window as he limps his way into the kitchen. This is her life now. Her home. It’s modest and simple, yet she doesn’t find herself craving more. It’s the most content and comfortable she’s been in a long time; finally ‘seen’ and understood by someone who doesn’t judge her based on her past or things she’d done to make money and survive. Who somehow doesn’t see the mountain of flaws and imperfections that she does. Carving out an existence together; optimistic about both the healing process and their future together.

She’s a foot from the door when her phone vibrates in her jacket pocket. Using her teeth to yank off her mittens, she fishes the cell from its hiding spot; frowning when she sees the name and number plastered across the screen.

It’s become far more than a once-daily experience. Over two dozen texts and voicemails left; ranging from sugary sweet requests for her to call back to annoyed sighs and questions of her whereabouts and her well-being, Culminating in the ranting and raving of a narcissist; attempts at gaslighting, vile name-calling, and threats to ‘track her down and beat her ass’ and ‘drag her back to where she belongs’. And she’s finally had enough; unwillingly to disrupt or sacrifice the peace, comfort, and happiness she’s finally submerged in.

“Hello?”

“So you ARE alive.”

“Is that disappointment in your voice?”

“Don’t start. I didn’t call for THIS.”

“What did you call for, mother? What HAVE you been calling for? Non-stop.”

“You’re my baby. My little girl. My only daughter. Have you ever thought that…”

Esme rolls her eyes. Instead of opening the door, she heads for the battered and weathered loveseat that resides on the porch; sighing heavily as she drops heavily onto it. Lucy dutifully follows behind; lying across her feet, head cocked to the side as she curiously watches her. “Have you been drinking?”

“No, I haven’t been drinking! Why would you…?”

“The only time you ever say anything remotely nice to me is when you’ve got a few in you. How much have you had? If you’re at this level of ass-kissing, it has to be at least a bottle of rye. Or two.”

“Like I told you, I haven’t been drinking. I…”

“You didn’t call to hear my bullshit, and I didn’t answer to hear yours.”

“Okay, so I may have had a couple of glasses of wine with dinner. But…”

“And likely half a dozen for dessert.”

“What is your problem? I call to check up on you and see how you’re doing and this is the treatment I get? For caring about my child? It’s been months since we’ve spoken. Since you’ve even attempted to touch base. I’ve left you all kinds of voicemails and text messages and.…”

“What is your sudden interest in my life? What do you suddenly care about how I’m doing and what I’m doing? If I wanted you to know, I would have talked to you a long time ago. I called you from Dubai. I let you know that I was alive and well, didn’t I?”

“That was almost ten months ago! Almost a full year. Despite what you think, I DO care about you, Esme. I DO love you.”

She gives a derisive snort.

“You were the one that pushed me away. Severed ties. When you decided to up and leave the Marine Corps and abandon your family. You just packed everything up and moved to New York City and…”

“My then-husband put me in the ICU. I left to get away from him. To start a life without him. I…”

“You could have worked things out. Instead of filing for divorce. You could have tried harder. Despite all of his issues and all of his anger, he’s a good man. And he WAS good to you. At times. You just choose to ignore that. If you were just honest with yourself…”

“Being honest with myself would have been knowing to leave YEARS ago. Not waiting until he nearly killed me.”

Her mother scoffs. “It wasn’t THAT bad. But you have always been a tad dramatic. Quite infamous when it comes to exaggeration. Now, I know things got a little…testy…at times, but…”

“A little testy? He used to beat the shit out of me, mom. If he didn’t like the food I made, he’d throw it on the floor, force me down on all fours, and make me eat it. Like I was a fucking animal. ‘Testy’ doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface.”

“I know Mark has his faults. I know he wasn’t perfect, but…”

“He used to rape me. When I’d say ‘no’. I was property to him. Something he owned. He said it was my ‘wifely duty’ to put out for him. And it was his duty to punish me when I didn’t. So yeah, he had his faults, alright.”

“You’re not exactly an easy person to live with, Esme. You’re not some angel yourself.”

“I don’t claim to be perfect. In way, shape, or form. But didn’t deserve any of the things he did to me. You have some hell of a nerve sticking up for him, you know that? Choosing him and his bullshit over your own daughter? But I guess I shouldn’t be surprised. I’ve always been lower than dirt to you.”

“You always have to be the victim, don’t you.”

“I WAS the victim. I was Mark’s, I was yours. But here I am, mom. Thriving. Making a life for myself. Being happy. All those you and Mark tried to kill inside of me? They’re still here. And you’ll never get close enough to hurt me ever again.”

“And just where ARE you making this wonderful, imaginary life for yourself? Where are you…?”

“It’s not imaginary. It’s very much real. And you know, it might not be all sunshine and roses. But it is wonderful. In a lot of ways.”

“Are you with him?”

“I am.”

“So it wasn’t just a passing thing. Like we’d all hoped. When you’d called to say that you’d met someone and were running away with them…”

“I didn’t run away. I didn’t have anything to run away from. I started over. Made a life for myself.”

“You had a life here. A mother, a stepfather, brothers, nieces, nephews…”

“I haven’t bothered with any of you…REALLY bothered with you…in years. I haven’t lived in Colorado in a long time.”

“When you abandoned your husband and your marriage and…”

“I saved myself. You can pretend that Mark is some sort of golden boy; that he’s God's gift to women and has never done anything wrong in his entire life. You can ignore all the evidence that’s been gathered against him; the police and hospital reports, the pictures of all the bumps and bruises and scratches and broken bones. You burying in the sand or up his ass doesn't change the fact that he’s a massive piece of shit.”

“You’re not exactly perfect yourself, Esme. I’ve lived with you. I know what kind of challenge you can be. You’re stubborn and high-strung and confrontational and…”

“And I didn’t deserve a damn thing that man did to me. Look, if you called just annoy the hell out of me, congratulations. You were successful. I’m going to hang up now. Because I don’t have the time or the tolerance for your bullshit. Goodbye, mother. Don’t…”

“Where are you?”

“Somewhere you won’t find me.”

“Are you back in the States?”

“No.”

“Well, I know you didn’t go back to Prague. Kyle showed up at your place a couple of weeks ago; the landlord told him that someone had come for your things and handled what was left on your lease. Paid off the final eight months. In cash.”

“Now you have Kyle doing your dirty work for you? When you say jump, does he ask ‘how high?’? You really will stop at nothing to weasel your way into my life. Stick your nose where it doesn’t belong.”

“You’re my daughter. My child. My…”

“No, mother. I’m a grown adult. Who is minding her own business and building a life for herself. Don’t start pretending to start giving a shit about me. It’s a little too late for that.”

“Am I at least allowed to know where you are?”

“I’m safe. That’s all that matters.”

“With him.”

“He has a name. I know you have this unhinged, bizarre hate towards him, but…”

“He took you away from me. From your family. He’s keeping you god knows where…”

“I’m here willingly. I’m here because I want to be. No one is keeping me under lock and key. Or holding a gun to my head. Why can’t that be enough for you? Knowing that I’m okay. That I’m safe and secure and protected. That I’m happy. Why…?”

“You barely know him. You…”

“Tyler, mom. His name is Tyler. Can’t you show him just that little bit of respect? He saved me. In every way a person CAN be saved. And we’re happy here. With each other. We’re making a life together. And I don’t want you or anyone else ruining that for us.”

“Where exactly is here? Australia? Did you go back there with him?”

“No. Not yet. We’ll get there, though. Eventually. Right now we’re just taking things easy. Lying low. Concentrating on each other. Getting to know one another.”

“And you can’t tell me where all of this is happening?”

“We’re in Europe.”

“Europe is a big place, Esme.”

“‘We’re in Austria.”

“Where in Austria?”

“Bergenz.” The lie rolls easily off her tongue. “A little place right near Lake Constance. It’s nice and quiet. Nothing fancy.”

“I can’t believe you’re doing this. Throwing your life away for some man. You barely know him; you went away on a business trip and ended up someone’s whore. You…”

“I love him. And he loves me. He…”

“You’re in love with what he can give you. How rich IS he?”

“What the hell kind of question is that? I’m not some gold digger, mother. I never have. But for your information, he’s just a regular guy. Strictly blue collar. He’s not a rich man by any stretch of the imagination. At least not when it comes to money, anyway.”

“What kind of blue-collar job puts someone in the hospital for months on end?”

“I already told you. He does private security. A job went south. He got hurt. Badly.”

“And you just somewhat randomly happened to meet him? While doing your own job? You do realize how suspicious that sounds, don’t you?”

“It’s what happened. We ended up in each other’s paths. It’s as simple as that.”

“The whole thing reeks, Esme. Your entire story. How you met him, what he does for a living, what happened to him in some shit hole, third world country. You must realize how lame this all sounds, don’t you? How pathetic? I know you’re hiding something.”

“I told you the basics. You don’t need to know anything else. What goes on between Tyler and me? That’s our business. Not yours. So you’ll just have to learn to accept it; the fact I met someone and I’m not coming home.”

“The hell I do.”

“Look, let’s just end things here, okay? You know I’m alive. You know I’m safe. That’s all that matters.”

“It’s only a matter of time. Before things go bad. It’s how things in your life are. It’s how YOU are.”

“Goodbye, mom.”

“Don’t think you can come crawling back here when he tosses you to the curb. When he finally grows tired of your bullshit and lashes out. Just like Mark did. Don’t you…”

“I said goodbye, mom.”

Ending the call before anything else can be said, she sits with her eyes closed as she attempts to regain her composure. She feels light-headed and nauseous; her chest is impossibly tight, her hands tremble violently as they tightly clutch the phone. And she doesn’t move until Lucy gives a pitiful whine and rests her head on her thigh.

“Everything’s okay,” she assures the dog. Managing a smile, she scratches under Lucy’s chin, strokes her ears and ruffles the fur at the nape of her neck. “I’m fine, sweet girl” Leaning down to place a kiss on the dog’s nose, she laughs when her face is bathed in kisses in response. “Best therapist ever,” she declares and stands. “Now let’s go and get some dinner”

*****

Tyler stands at the counter; briefly glancing over his shoulder when he hears the door open. Greeting her with a smile before returning to the task at hand; removing plates, cups, and cutlery from cupboards and drawers, stirring the pot of soup that simmers on the hot plate.

“I was starting to get worried. Thought maybe a coyote got you. Or that you decided to run away from home.”

“Was that wishful thinking on your part?” she teases, as she toes off her boots and yanks the knit beaning from her head. Smoothing a palm over her hair, then shoving the garment into one of the pockets on her coat. “Were you hoping I disappeared? Or that I ended up some tasty snack for the wildlife?”

“Yeah…right…” He uses a pair of metal tongs to scoop salad onto the empty plates “I can’t believe you’d even ask me that.”

“I have bad news for you, buddy…” Shrugging out of her coat, she places it over his as it hangs on a hook next to the door. “...you can’t get rid of me that easy.”

“Maybe I don’t want to get rid of you at all. Have you ever considered that?”

“Have you ever considered you’re a glutton for punishment? What’s the saying?” Wanders into the living room, she shoves her feet into a pair of Ugg slippers before joining him in the kitchen. “Be careful what you wish for?”

“If spending the next forty, fifty years with you is the worst that could happen to me, I’ll consider myself extremely lucky.”

“Jesus…” Desperately needing that closeness, connection and security that only he can provide, she steps behind him, wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her head against his back. “...maybe your brain injury IS worse than they thought.”

“This is probably the most coherent I’ve been thinking in years.” He gives her the time she needs; alternating between sipping a mug of coffee and repeatedly cleaning the same spot on the counter as she clings to him. Not moving or speaking until she pats her hands against his stomach, squeezes his hips, and steps back. Gulping down his drink before turning to face her. “Everything alright?”

“I finally got up the nerve to answer the phone. I wish I could say I’m pleasantly surprised about how things went…”

“That good, huh?”

“Not nearly as bad as I thought it would be, but still pretty goddamn awful.”

“I’m sorry. I never should have got on you about talking to her. I just thought the sooner you did, the sooner she’d just leave you the fuck alone.”

“It’s not your fault she’s a total cunt. And you were right; I did need to get my head out of my ass and deal with her. She would have just kept calling and leaving voice messages until I finally had a mental breakdown. Which…who knows…could be her end game.”

“What did she want?” Handing her a bowl of salad and a fork, he leans against the counter and digs into his own. “Just checking up on ya? Making sure I’m not holding you hostage? Putting drugs in your food? Forcing you to comply and stay in my…what did she call it…den of iniquity?”

“She’s a crazy bitch. She wanted to know when I was coming home. Colorado hasn’t been home in over a decade. I don’t know why the hell she thought I’d head there. Want to hear the most fucked up part? A total mommy dearest moment? She sent my brother Kyle to Prague. To my apartment. I guess she thought I was bullshitting about where I was. That I was merely locking myself in the house and ignoring everyone.”

“Must have been a hell of a shock when he found your place was empty.”

“Just a bit. I told her we were in Austria; just lying low, taking it easy and recuperating. I didn’t say EXACTLY where, though. The last thing we need is her sending a search party to Gmunden.”

“Isn’t the biggest place. They could probably just ask in town and then track us down.”

“It wouldn’t be too difficult. I mean, a six-foot-three Australian with a bad limp and a resting asshole face doesn’t exactly blend into the crowd.”

“You’re going to have to tell her eventually. The WHOLE truth. Because it WILL get out. Somehow. And not hearing it from you will cause a whole world of trouble.”

“It’s not an easy thing to tell people, you know? Would you want to hear it? That your kid was caught up in black ops? That she was selling people out to mercenaries? That she was making money lying about who she was and using and deceiving people?”

“It would be hard to hear. But, they’re still my kid and…”

“My mother is NOT like us. She doesn’t think the way we do. And she’s hardly a parent. At least she was never one to me.”

“Are you embarrassed? Of the truth?”

“What would I be embarrassed of? And please don’t say you, because that is the furthest thing from the truth.”

“I kill people for money. Or I used to, anyway.”

“We are not getting into that conversation. You know where I stand; how I feel about what you do…what you DID. And you’re not going to change my mind But for the record? No. I’m not embarrassed of you. I have no reason to be. I didn’t do anything wrong: I knew exactly who you were and what you did and I went into things willingly. And I STAY in them willingly. I’m not trying to hide you, Tyler.”

“I never said…”

“I’m trying to protect you. And I know what you’re going to say; you’re a big boy and can take care of yourself and you don’t need little old me doing it for you.”

“You are just putting all kinds of words in my mouth tonight.”

“And I don’t mean PHYSICALLY protect you. I mean, look at me. I’m all of five feet tall and a hundred pounds soaking wet. I wouldn’t do much damage even if I tried.”

“I don’t know, it’s the little ones you usually need to watch out for. They’re cagey fuckers.”

“I’m talking about protecting you…US…from them. I know what my family is like. Especially my mother. She’s already on the warpath; talking all kinds of bullshit and trying to make you sound like some horrible, controlling and abusive person. She finds out the truth? She will make things worse.”

“I don’t give a fuck what she thinks about me. You should know that by now.”

“But I care. It hurts, alright? Hearing her talking about you like that. Because I know who you are. I know what you’ve been through and how you almost didn’t make it out the other side. And because I love you. Who wants to hear mean shit about the person they love?”

“I just think you need to take it with a grain of salt. I don’t want you getting worked up over it. I’m not the only one that’s been through it. In the past ten months. You shouldn't have to go through THIS, too.”

“If I tell her everything, she will make it her mission to tear us apart. She will do whatever she can to come between us. And I know you think I’m brave and strong and…”

“You are. You’re the strongest person I’ve ever known.”

“...maybe I am. Most of the time. But I’m tired. I don’t have it in me to fight right now. I am so tired, Tyler. Is it really so wrong that I can’t do it right now? That I just want a fucking break?”

“No.” Plucking the bowl out of her hand, he sets it on the counter, then gathers her into his arms. Hands continuously running up and down her back as her arms circle his waist and her head rests against him. “It’s not wrong at all.”

“I just want it to be US. At least for a little while.”

“As long as you need it to be, okay? No rush.”

“I just can’t do it. I can’t deal with her. Not right now.”

“You don’t have to. She calls back, I’ll answer. You don’t need to worry about her. I’ll take care of things.”

She looks up at him, tears spilling down her cheeks. “What did I do wrong?”

“What do you mean? What…?”

“To make her hate me like she does. What did I do? To deserve it?”

“You didn’t do a goddamn thing. The way she is? It’s not about you. It’s about her. She’s a bitter, nasty old woman. She’s dead inside. She doesn’t give a fuck about anyone but herself.”

“But she’s only like that with me. She’s never loved me. She never even wanted me. Why? What did I ever do? If she’d just told me, I could have fixed things. I could have been better. I could have…”

“Esme…” Cradling her face in his palms, his thumbs swipe at the tears that glisten on her cheeks. “...it’s not about you. It never has been. You didn’t do anything wrong. And you didn’t deserve it. You still don’t.”

“I’m tired. I am so tired.”

“I know.” He presses a kiss to her brow, then gathers her even tighter into his chest. “It’s time to rest now, okay? You’ve fought enough. You don’t need to do it anymore. I’ve got just enough in me to do it for both of us.”

“I just want it to be us. No one else. Just us.”

“It will be,” he assures her, feeling her body tremble against his as she openly sobs. “There’s nothing for you to worry about. She can’t hurt you anymore. No one can.”

****

“When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up?”

They lay on the couch; caught up in a mess of naked limbs and tangled blankets. Basking in both the aftermath of their lovemaking and the warmth from the nearby fire.

His knuckles slide along the small of her back. “Where did that come from?”

“I know, totally random.” Esme laughs against the side of his neck. “Not the most romantic of pillow talk, huh?”

“And you say I’m terrible at it.”

“You talk about food and football and how long it’s going to take you to be ready to go again. Whispering sweet nothings is definitely NOT your forte.”

“Sweet nothings? Who are you trying to kid? You’re not into the shit. You like the absolute filth that comes out of my mouth. Don’t even try to deny it.”

“The filthier the better.” Spresses a series of kisses along his jaw, stopping at the corner of his mouth. “I don’t want you to change, though. I kinda like you the way you are. You’re perfect. At least for me, anyway.”

“Are you sure you’re not the one with the brain injury?”

“You’ll never see yourself the way I see you. I’ve relegated myself to that fact.” Rolling onto her stomach, she places her head on his chest. “I think talking to the wicked witch of the midwest brought some things up. About my childhood. And where I ended up compared to where I’d hoped I’d be.”

“Where DID you hope you’d be?”

“Not here, that’s for sure.”

“So but ass naked with a mercenary wasn’t high on your list of dream scenarios, I take it?”

“No. But that certainly turned out extremely well, didn’t it? Of all the things I have no complaints about, you’re at the top of the list. Well, I could do without your snoring and how you leave your dirty clothes in front of the hamper instead of putting them inside…”

“I’m working on it. I’ve lived alone for a long time. I haven’t had to worry about that kind of shit in a while.”

“As far as cohabiting goes, I’ve lived with A LOT worse. And you’re hot, so you tend to get away with a lot more than other mere mortals.”

“Yeah, you’re not hard to look at either. Which is why I don’t get on your case about squeezing the toothpaste tube in the middle. Or how you leave half-empty mugs of tea all over the goddamn place. That’s something I don’t get, actually.”

“What’s that?”

“How you always leave some behind when you make yourself a drink. But if I do it for you, you drink the whole thing. What’s up with that?”

“Because when you make it, it’s perfect. It tastes just right. Way better than when I do it myself.”

“I think that’s all in your head. How different could it be? It’s boiled water and a tea bag. A bit of milk.”

“I can’t explain it, alright. It’s just the way it is. It’s just so much better.”

“You know what I think? I think you’re spoiled. Or you like to be, anyway. All that independent woman stuff? That whole ‘I don’t need any man’ thing? I think deep down it’s all an act. That you like being taken care of. Probably because no one has ever done it.”

“Is that so wrong?” Raising her head from his chest, she smiles as he pushes a hand through her hair. Fingers slipping through the long, dark tresses; calloused tips brushing against the nape of her neck before travelling down the length of her spine. “If I DO like it?”

“Nothing wrong with it at all. I just wish I was better at it. Not really my strength, you know? Taking care of other people.”

“I don’t think you give yourself enough credit.”

“I think you give me too much. That, and my past kind of speaks for itself.”

“You’re not exactly the guy you were back then.”

“Maybe not. But I’m not even the guy I was when I met you. At least not physically. I can’t take care of you and protect you the way I could nine months ago.”

“Nine months ago, you were clinically dead. I think you’re allowed to be a little rusty. Besides, if you had to? If there was some kind of threat? If I was in danger? You’d find a way to protect me. Nothing would stop you. Not even a bad shoulder or a bum leg. It’s one thing I never worry about when I’m with you. If I’m safe or not.”

“I may not have all the right words, and I may not know how to handle things sometimes, but there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for you, Esme. To make you happy. Keep you safe. Even with my fucked up head. And body.”

“You’ve come a long way. In less than a year. And you’re not broken, Tyler. Mentally or physically. A little banged up and dented and tarnished, maybe. But not broken.”

“You have this uncanny ability of always seeing the best in people. Whether anything good exists in them or not.”

“A lot of good exists inside of you. I’ve never doubted that. I’ve always seen it. It was in your eyes; I saw it the second Nik introduced us. You had this kindness in them. This humanity. This sadness. You were carrying around all this baggage and all this pain, but it was still there. You weren’t like anyone I’d ever met on the job. In many ways.”

“Admit it, you were just thankful you didn’t end up having to be pretend married to some ugly, miserable old fuck,”

“Well, you certainly aren’t ugly. Or old.”

Tyler smirks. “You smart ass.”

“Before I met you, I’d never felt protected. Safe. I didn’t even realize I wanted…or needed… to feel those things.”

“I’m just sorry that everyone in your life has been such a fucking disappointment. Especially that dick head ex-husband of yours.”

“Falling for his bullshit was one of the biggest mistakes I’ve ever made. The only thing bigger? Staying with him. I always told myself I’d never be that type of woman; someone who would just roll over and take the abuse and hold onto this faint hope that I could change him. Talk about being a judgy bitch, huh? I never understood why women stuck around. How could they be so weak and pathetic? Why would they just sit back and ‘take it’? And then it happened to me and I realized it wasn’t easy. It wasn’t as simple as just walking away.”

“There’s nothing weak or pathetic about you. I learned that quickly. IN Dhaka. Never mind everything you put up with afterwards.”

“The saddest part of it all is that I started to believe every word that came out of his mouth. That he was the best I could do. I was lucky to have someone like him; he kept a roof over my head, food on the table, and clothes on my back. Even if I didn’t deserve those things. He always called it tough love; the beatings and the verbal abuse helped ‘toughen me up’. I was too sensitive. Too soft. Especially for someone who’d been in the Corps. He used to say I must have ‘slept my way’ through the system.”

“You know, the more you talk about him, the more homicidal I become.”

“As much as I appreciate you wanting to defend my honour and rip him from limb to limb, it’s not why I bring him up. I don’t do it to piss you off; I do it so you’ll know more about me. We didn’t get much time for that kind of thing, you know? We were only in Dhaka for five days and then you were unconscious for half a year after that. We didn’t get much of a chance, did we? To learn about one another.”

“Yeah, we have been sort of thrown to the wolves, haven’t we? Not that I’m complaining. It hasn’t been that bad.”

“Hasn’t been that bad, huh?” She laughs, and tugs playfully at one of his ears. “I know you’re just speaking for yourself when you say that. Because I swear, living with you sometimes…”

Grinning he brings a hand down on her ass in a playful slap, then lightly pinches the supple skin. “Why are you mean to me all the time? Why do you tease me so much?”

“Because it’s fun. And it’s not being mean, I promise, everything I say? I say out of love. And pure animalistic lust.”

“That’s my favourite kind.” His free hand gently gathers up her hair. Moving it away from her face and off her shoulder; palm smoothing down it as it lays on her back. The smile quickly fading, his eyes darkening. “You know it wasn’t your fault, yeah? All the things he said. The things he did. You didn’t deserve any of it.”

“I’m starting to realize that. It’s taking a lot longer than I thought; coming to terms with just how awful he was and what I allowed him to get away with. I thought it would be easier; I’d just be able to put it behind me as soon as I got away from him.”

“You need to stop blaming yourself. You didn’t do anything wrong. It was never about you, Esme. It was always about him.”

“When I finally left, I told myself I’d stay single forever. It just wasn’t worth putting myself out there; having to explain my past and defend the choices I made. And forget about trusting someone; every person I’d ever had any faith in turned out to be nothing but a fucking disappointment. How do you get close to someone after going through all that? How do you ever feel comfortable with anyone again? Let them even get remotely close?”

“Something must have went wrong, huh?” He chides, and tugs on a strand of her hair. ‘Cause here we are.”

“Before you, the only thing I ever knew…or thought I knew…about love was that it hurt. It was painful; physically AND mentally. Everyone I’d loved…who had claimed to love ME...destroyed me.”

“No. They didn’t. Because if you did, we wouldn’t be here right now. Talking about this. You wouldn’t have even looked at me twice, let alone given me a chance. They didn’t destroy you, Esme. They tried. But it didn’t work.”

“Everything changed when you came along. I changed. All those things Mark said to me? About how no one would ever want me? That I was too difficult to love and didn’t deserve to be? It took you less than a week to prove him wrong.”

“Don’t make me out to be some kind of prize, okay? I’ve got my own issues. Maybe not nearly as bad as his, but…”

“You never hid them from me, though. And you never used them to hurt me. You made me feel beautiful. You looked at me like I was the most incredible woman on earth. And that was only four days into things.”

“To me you were, You ARE.”

“You’re not the monster you think you are, Tyler. You’re a good man who has been through some bad shit. Who’s had to do some questionable things out of self-perseverance. And yeah, maybe you have made some bad decisions. But believe me, even with all your baggage? The drinking and the pain meds? You are nowhere near being like Mark.”

“I’m trying. I don’t want to be a mess forever. You deserve better than that.”

“For what it’s worth, you’re not as messy as you were. I think nearly dying had something to do with that; hard to be an alcoholic and a junkie when you’re in a coma for seven months.”

“I think rehab would have been slightly less painful. Than taking a bullet to the throat.”

“How quickly you forget the seven others they pulled from you.”

“Trust me, my body reminds me every day. The only thing I really hate? About how it went down? The fact that you had to see all of that. That you had to see me completely fucked up.”

“It wasn’t your fault. You didn’t know how bad things would go. And yeah, it’s going to stay with me. For quite a while. But I’ll deal. I’ll just take it one day at a time.”

“You know you don’t have to do that alone, yeah? Deal with it?”

Smiling, she presses a chaste kiss to his lips. “I know.”

Gathering up the edges of one of the blankets, she pulls it further up their naked bodies; tucking it under her chin as she once more lays her head upon his shoulder. Her breath is warm and sweet against the side of his neck as his fingers continuously glide up and down her spine; her own tracing the tattoo on his right rib cage and repeatedly combing through his longer strands of hair. He enjoys the closeness in a way he never had before; failing to remember the last time anyone had made him feel that relaxed and comfortable. This beautiful, impossibly tiny woman somehow his refuge. The one person that makes HIM feel safe and secure.

“You never did answer my question.”

He turns his face into hers, lips meeting her brow. “I forgot what it was.”

“When you were a little boy, what did you want to be when you grew up?”

“You mean other than as far away from my old man as possible?”

“What kind of things did you dream about? What did you hope to be doing as an adult?”

“I had a couple of things that were pretty far-fetched. Although when I was little, nothing seemed impossible.”

“What were they?”

“I wanted to be a professional surfer. Or a pro football player.”

“Honestly, I’m not surprised with either of those choices. You wanted to play for the Western Bulldogs, didn’t you.”

“Guilty as charged. They’ve always been my favourite. Which is weird, considering I was born and raised in the East. Once I got a bit older, I started thinking more realistically about things. Decided I wanted to be a firefighter. Or a cop.”

“Really?”

“You sound surprised.”

“I just can’t see you as a cop. I don’t know why. Definitely a firefighter, though. You’d look so hot in turn-out gear.”

“I didn’t think that kind of thing would turn you on. Not with your brother being one..”

“My brother is…I don’t know…my brother. Totally not in the same league as you. How come you never went in that direction? You would have passed all the training; you were athletic, you had the size, the strength. What made you choose the military?”

“My graduating year, they had one of those ‘career days’. You know where people from all different lines of work come and peddle what they do and try to drum up interest. There was a recruiter from the army there and I’m sure you know what they’re like; fatigues, boots all polished, overly cheerful and optimistic.”

“I was offered that job once. When I first joined the Corps. I was told it was a better choice for me; it suited my personality better.”

“What did you tell them? To go fuck themselves?”

“Basically, yeah.”

“I bet you were underestimated right from the day you were born.”

“I’ve always been a study in contraction. People expect meek and mild. I know you did.”

“I did. And man, did I ever find out the hard way. You didn’t waste your time telling me to get fucked.”

“And not in the fun, sexy way, either.”

“Nope. That came a few days later.”

She laughs against the side of his neck, then places a line of kisses along his jaw. “And when it did, it was very fun and very, very, VERY sexy.”

“I have no complaints.”

“So…” Lifting her head from its resting place, she uses two fingertips to clear strands of hair from his brow. “...this recruiter…”

“You’re nothing if not persistent.”

“I like to know things. About you. And I want to know ALL of them. All the things.”

“This guy knew how to sell things. He made it sound so awesome. I’d get to play with guns, learn how to drive a tank, jump out of airplanes. They’d even pay for it if I wanted to further my education; become an engineer or an instructor or just make my way up the food chain and be an officer.”

“Would you have wanted to be one? An officer?”

“I don’t think so. Being out there breaking a sweat and getting my hands dirty was always my thing. The idea of wearing a uniform, sitting behind a desk and getting old and fat doesn’t do it for me, you know? But you know what really sold it? I’d get to see the world. Travel to different places. On their dime.”

“Yeah, even in the States they try hard to sell that side of things.”

“I hadn’t even turned eighteen yet. I was desperate to escape; I wanted to be as far away from my dad as possible and being in the army made the most sense. But I was young and dumb; I never stopped to think that ‘seeing the world’ really meant going into war-torn places; displacing people even more, killing them, even.”

“That’s not ALL you did. You helped more people than you hurt. That’s something I’m sure of.”

“Isn’t helping what hurts them most of the time?”

“It’s easy to see it that way, I guess. Sometimes the road to helping others isn’t a pretty one. And war is ugly; you and I have seen that firsthand. But isn’t it sometimes beautiful, too? When the means lead to an incredible end? When you see just how much you’ve helped someone? How better their life becomes simply because you showed up in it?”

“I don’t know how you do it. See things…people…the way you do.”

“I learned a long time ago that if I didn’t find the good in everything and everyone, I wasn’t going to survive. Not mentally, anyway. I was there too; in the Middle East. And we may not have had the same job and the same responsibilities, but I saw just how awful things were. I heard the horror stories.”

“You of all people didn’t deserve to be there. Going through all that.”

“But I chose it. The poor people that lived there didn’t. And you know what? it’s so much easier to remember the bad stuff. One horrible thing can wipe out a hundred good things.”

“Every so often, that psychology degree of yours comes out to play.”

“It’s less what I learned in school and more I learned OUT of it. Not to mention PTSD is a monster. Sometimes it makes it pretty hard to see the good in anything.”

“Is there you start psychoanalyzing me? Do you charge by the hour or…?”

“It’s just the truth, unfortunately. And you DO have PTSD.”

“I’m not the only one in this room…this bed…that does.”

“Maybe…” (trails a nail along the length of his jaw, over the scar that mars the bottom of his chin). “...but you’re the only one officially diagnosed, so…”

He doesn’t push it; knowing she’s not in the right ‘headspace’ to confront her demons. That choosing to focus on his healing and his battles effectively -for now- silences and numbs her own.

“What about you?” His hand moves through her hair; dark, silky tresses slipping easily through his fingers, palm coming to rest in the middle of her back.

“What about me?”

“What were you like? When you were a little girl? Not that you ever grew… physically…past twelve.” Grinning, he places a kiss on her brow when she laughs. “What did a young Esme dream about? What did she want to be?”

“God, so many different things. I always had these lofty, little girl dreams; wild and crazy things that would never come true. Like marrying a Crown Prince or becoming a famous actress and winning a record number of Oscars. I even used to practice my acceptance speeches in the bathroom mirror. Or I’d write the next great American novel; it would top the charts around the world and I’d win a Pulitzer. I even once thought I’d invent a cure for cancer and win a Nobel.”

“I’m sure a couple of those weren’t too far out of reach. You could find a cure for cancer. Or write a novel. You’re still young.”

“The craziest thing I ever wanted to be? A fighter pilot. A female Maverick from Top Gun.”

“Now that I CAN’T see.”

“Once I realized I needed to concentrate on something a tad more realistic, I switched to teaching and nursing. I would have loved to have gotten into pediatrics. Or taught kindergarten kids. Catch them when they’re still so innocent and curious and so in love with the world and everyone in it.”

“You’d be amazing at both of those. I can see why kids would love you.”

“Why? Because I’m just as small as they are?”

“Well, THAT. But just the way you are. WHO you are. You see the good in the world. Everything you’ve been through…the things you’ve seen and heard and even DONE…you still find beauty in everything. Not to mention you have the patience of a saint, Look how long you’ve stuck around. Put up with my shit.”

“You’re not as difficult as you think you are.”

“But I AM difficult.”

“You have your moments.” She kisses him; signing into his mouth when he tangles his fingers in her hair and pulls her tighter against him.

“You know, you could still do one of those things. Teach or be a nurse. You’ve got a lot of years ahead of you still.”

“I’m going to have to figure out something. I can’t sit on my ass for the rest of my life.”

“It’s not like there’s a rush. We’re not exactly poor. We’re not going to run out of money anytime soon. And if you wanted to go back and work for Nik…”

“No. HELL NO. That ship has long sailed. You’re not the only one that’s retired. You know what I really want to do right now? Until it’s no longer financially possible or we drive each other crazy? Whichever comes first?”

“What’s that?”

“Just…live. With you. And without having to worry about what comes next. “ She once more settles her head on his chest; a hand on his shoulder, thumb continuously brushing against the Roman numeral tattoo that decorates the skin. “Do you want to know what I REALLY wanted to? When I was growing up? Something I still think about from time to time?”

“Of course I want to know.”

“I wanted to own a bookstore.”

“You know for some reason, that makes total sense with you.”

“I kept a journal for the longest time. Completely dedicated to the dream. I’d write down all my ideas, and even sketch things out. I had it all planned out. It would have snow-white walls, but I’d fill the place with tons of colourful furniture and decor and have neighbourhood kids submit artwork I’d frame and hang. And I have dedicated spaces for people to hang out; chess tables, comfy chairs to settle down and read a book in, a courtyard out back if they wanted fresh air. I’d even have drinks and treats. Coffee, tea, and juices, muffins and cookies and sandwiches.”

“Sounds like a pretty awesome place.”

“I’d have a dedicated kids' space; everything in primary colours, a little play area and craft station, a small party room where they could celebrate their birthday. There’d be fish tanks; a couple for turtles, even. And some cages for birds and a few hamsters. And there’d be a bookstore cat.”

“You had all this planned out?”

Esme nods enthusiastically. “I even had the name picked. Do you want to hear it?”

“You should know by now that you don’t need to ask if I want to hear things.”

“I wanted to call it Turn the Page.”

(smiling, he uses two fingers to loop strands of hair behind her ears) “That’s perfect. And you sometimes still think about it? Owning a place like that?”

“Sometimes. We all hold on to some little dream, don’t we? Something from our childhood that can’t seem to let go of?”

“I mean, it’s not like it’s impossible. If it’s something you really want to do…”

“It’s just a little something I like to think about from time to time. That dream of mine got me through some pretty rough shit growing up. I always could escape to it; when my mom was being extra horrible.”

“Would you WANT to do it? Is it something that would make you happy? Having your bookstore?”

“Right now, I have all I need to make me happy. All I want to concentrate on? Is you. Us.”

Pecking his ips, then moves onto her side; her back pressed against the rear cushions of the sofa, face nestled in the crook of his neck, Their eyes closed as his fingers continuously graze up and down her spine and they listen to the crackling of the fire and winter storm raging outside; the howling of the wind and the rattling of the windows and the patter of ice against the glass.

She yawns noisily, then rubs her cheek against him) “I love you, you know.”

“I know. And I love you. More than you’ll ever know.” He drops a kiss on the top of her head. “You make me want to be a better man.”

S raises her head to look at him, tears sparkling in her eyes. “What?”

“You do. I want to be better for you. I want to be the kind of man YOU want. That you can be proud of.”

“I DO want you. And I AM proud of you.”

“But I want it to stay that way. I don’t want to go back to who I was. I want to be better. Do better. Be what you need. And deserve. Hey….” (gives an awkward chuckle when the tears escape, quickly using his fingertips to swipe them off her cheeks) “...don’t do that. Don’t cry. I hate when you cry.”

“I think that’s the most beautiful thing anyone has ever said to me. It’s the best compliment I’ve EVER gotten.”

“It’s all true. It’s the way you make me feel. Not just wanting to BE better, but knowing I can get there.”

She kisses him; long and sweet and sweet; nuzzling her nose against his cheek and his ears and whispering words of adoring and affection that no one has ever bestowed upon him. And she once more tucks herself into his side; tighter than before, wanting, needing, and enjoying the protection only he can provide. Finding herself quickly lulled to sleep by his steady, rhythmic breathing, the stroking of her hair, and the warmth of his skin against hers.

#Tyler and Esme series #Tyler Rake #Tyler Rake fanfic #Tyler Rake fan fiction #Extraction #Extraction 2 #Extraction fanfic #Extraction fan fiction #Tyler Rake x OFC #Esme Drummond #Esme Rake #chris hemsworth

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cringycorruption · 8 months

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Hello everyone and welcome to my second day of blogging about Palestine

today i wanted to highlight some charities and foundations that you can financially support instead of big companies who are going to fund your money into guns and supplies for the Israel troops

1. Press - House Palestine

Press-house Palestine is a non-for-profit organisation which supports the journalists documenting the lives of people within Gaza. This organisation grants journalists with legal protection so that their experiences and freedom of speech can be presented online. ( they also have a instagram by the name @press_house_palestine ) This link provides articles about ongoing events within the country

2. Doctors Without Borders

i’m sure that there a high chance that you have heard about this one before, but ill mention it anyways since its a good charity. Doctors Without Borders is a organisation dedicated to supplying medical aid to places without proper access to it. what i have linked below is a donation link for their specific Gaza cause, which both implores for a ceasefire and provides Palestinians with medical equipment. you have the option to donate monthly or just one time

3. Islamic Relief Australia

this organisation is one that is located within Australia, but strives to provide food and water to the people. So far they have already given 16000+ people water and over 1 million ready-to-eat meals. They also have other donation links within the site that incudes to help rebuild infrastructure within Gaza and to help rehome palestinians to Australia. NOTE: There are other varients of this organisation within other countries such as the UK

4. Olive Kids

Olive kids is a foundation focused on supporting the children of Gaza. this includes education, medicine and food. This is another Australian-based foundation but that is because i live in australia. if you want to find region specific causes for your location then please google it yourself. Australian causes can be donated to by anyone anyways so you might aswell use this info anyways

5. Action Aid UK

this foundation focuses on providing Palestinians with the services that they do not have anymore, such as power and electricity. They do 90% immediately going towards the people of Gaza and 10% for future emergencies

I also want to stress two things. 1, if you arent in the right financial position to donate then dont, spreading the word does help aswell and 2, im not the excuse for you not to research yourself. all of these groups i found by myself via google, and as long as you have some media literacy, you too can find information. and you should find more than 5 and spread it around, i just wanted to highlight 1 from 5 different sections since i hadnt even heard about most of these until now.

more organisation/fundraisers here:

#palenstine #free gaza #gaza #gazaunderattack #free palestine #charities in support of palestine #kats social justice

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whenua-and-moana · 8 months

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Banaba

How the West Made an Island Unhabitable (and Consumed its People's Bones)

Banaba, aka Ocean Island, is a small island in Micronesia. It's legally part of Kiribati [kih-rih-bas] but geographically, culturally, and politically very distinct. At three hundred kilometres from its nearest neighbour, Banaba is one of the most isolated places on earth.

It is also among one of the most ecologically devastated.

In the 1900's, a UK / Aotearoa / Australian owned mining company dug up and shipped away huge amounts of Banaba's phosphate-rich soil for use as fertilizer. They grew rich and created Aotearoa's massive agricultural industry from literal stolen land.

More than just the physical earth was taken. Phosphate mining stripped the layers where Banabans had buried their dead for thousands of years. The dust of their bones fed the lands of the West, creating rich green fields that Banabans would never see the profits of.

When I say 'huge amounts' of earth; 90% of the island's surface was stripped away.

[Left image: an aerial view of Banaba showing a roughly oval island with no vegetation in the centre. The outside is ringed by a thin strip of forest. Right image: a photo of the edge of a mining area. In the background is a forest, but then the ground drops off sharply into irregular rocky terrain.]

The ancient sacred caves were destroyed. The island's only source of fresh water was irreversibly polluted and left it unusable to this day. The interior of Banaba became one great hollow of uneven rock, so full of dips and pillars that it is now almost completely impassable on foot. It was left a barren land.

Banaba is not the only Pacific island devastated by phosphate mining; most notably, its neighbour Nauru had 80% of its surface stripped away. But nowhere has been exploited to quite the same extent as Banaba.

There were further indignities and horrors inflicted on the Banaban people, including indescribable atrocities carried out by Japanese occupiers during WWII, and tbe Britain-led forceful relocation of Banabans to Rabi Island in Fiji. Many still live there today. Others have migrated away.

[Image: Banaban girls performing a traditional dance on Rabi Island.]

The traumatic experiences of Banabans, the mass murders and the separation from their ancestral land have all caused significant cultural loss. This includes the loss of the Banaban language.

Approximately three hundred Banabans have returned to their home island, surviving due to supplies shipped in every few months. The only freshwater source remains unusable and severe droughts strike Banaba every three to four years. Although a desalination plant exists there, the vulnerability of the island became all too clear in 2021 when the plant broke down in the middle of a drought. It took three months for repair equipment to arrive. During that time the residents had no fresh water. Their only food was fish because all of their crops had died. They survived by sucking the liquid from fish eyeballs.

And an Australian mining company wants to do it all again.

Part of the reason that people returned to Banaba, despite the difficulties of life there, was to protect it from further mining. But in August last year, the Australian mining company Centrex announced a plan to restart phosphate mining on Banaba. The plan has been paused due to protests from the Banaban people, but it could be restarted again at any time.

We cannot leave it here. If you want to do one small thing to help, you can sign this petition from Banaban community leaders to stop the proposed new phosphate mine. But more than that, Banabans have been campaigning for Australia and Aotearoa to fund ecological restoration projects, especially for the sacred caves that were once the island's source of fresh water. As Katerina Teiawa says:

"We need to move away from this same continuous narrative of ‘the poor Banaban people, who have no water, help them’ and move towards an approach that is actually finding a solution.

This whole thing is a series of crises. We can’t just keep telling the story of devastation and vulnerability over and over again. Where does the crisis end, if not with justice?"

#banaba #micronesia #pacific islands #colonisation #indigenous rights #my posts

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australiafoodequipment · 2 months

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Commercial Refrigeration | AustraliaFoodEquipment

When it comes to running a successful food service business, having reliable and efficient refrigeration is crucial. Commercial refrigeration systems play a vital role in preserving perishable goods, maintaining food safety standards, and ensuring smooth operations in restaurants, grocery stores, and other food-related establishments.

Point 1: Importance of Temperature Control

One of the primary functions of commercial refrigeration is to maintain consistent and safe temperatures for storing food items. Different foods require specific temperature ranges to prevent spoilage and ensure freshness. For example, meats and dairy products need colder temperatures compared to fruits and vegetables. Proper temperature control not only extends the shelf life of products but also prevents bacterial growth, reducing the risk of foodborne illnesses.

Point 2: Types of Commercial Refrigeration Systems

There are various types of Commercial Refrigeration systems tailored to different needs. Walk-in coolers and freezers are common in larger establishments, offering ample storage space and easy access for bulk items. Reach-in refrigerators and freezers are ideal for smaller spaces or front-of-house use, providing convenience and visibility of stored items. Display refrigerators are designed to showcase products attractively while keeping them chilled, perfect for bakeries, delis, and retail settings.

Point 3: Energy Efficiency and Sustainability

Modern commercial refrigeration systems emphasize energy efficiency to reduce operational costs and environmental impact. Energy-efficient compressors, LED lighting, and advanced insulation techniques help minimize electricity consumption without compromising performance. Additionally, some systems utilize eco-friendly refrigerants to comply with environmental regulations and promote sustainability in food service operations.

Point 4: Maintenance and Service

Regular maintenance is crucial for ensuring the longevity and efficiency of commercial refrigeration systems. Scheduled inspections, cleaning of condenser coils, and checking refrigerant levels are essential tasks to prevent breakdowns and maintain optimal performance. Timely repairs by qualified technicians help address minor issues before they escalate, minimizing downtime and potential loss of perishable inventory.

Conclusion

In conclusion, investing in quality commercial refrigeration is a cornerstone of successful food business operations. By prioritizing temperature control, choosing the right system for specific needs, embracing energy-efficient practices, and committing to regular maintenance, businesses can ensure food safety, reduce operating costs, and contribute to environmental sustainability. Understanding these essentials empowers food service professionals to make informed decisions that support their operational goals and enhance customer satisfaction.

For More:

Contact: +61 430 001 816

Email: [email protected]

Timings: Mon-Fri: 10 am – 5 pm

Visit Us: https://www.australiafoodequipment.com.au/

#commercial freezer #freezer #australia food equipment #island display freezer

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trills-n-clicks · 6 months

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Captain Trilps "Spider" Locket

Mainly going by Spider, but Trilps by close friends in private, she's the captain of TF Arach.

NONE OF THIS INFORMATION IS OF ACTUAL PEOPLE, SOME DETAILS ARE TAKEN FROM MYSELF BUT IT IS NOT BASED ON ME!!!

TF Arach Masterlist

DOB: August 27th, 1987. [36 years old]

Relationships: ↓

Livia Locket- Wife <alive> {Took Trilps last name}

Dorothy Locket- Mother <dead>

Anderson Millard- Father <dead>

/////// ///////- Uncle (Fathers side) <alive> {he's bed ridden :'(}

//////// Locket- Nephew (Mother's side) <alive>

Alice /////////- Niece (Fathers side) <alive>

Renee Locket-Millard- Brother <alive>

Sally Millard- Sister <alive>

Molly ////////- Goddaughter <dead>

Physical details: ↓

Head: Dark brown, collarbone height, kinda wavy (1C-2A) hair(she tucks he bangs behind her ears, otherwise they would be flat bangs hanging low). Dark indigo downturned and close-set eyes. Bulbous nose with a slight upturn. She has a heavy lower lip and a rounded square face shape.

Body: Mesomorphic, Apple shape. Large hips smaller bust, kinda like a Mama bod, my queen 🥺

Marks (scars, birthmarks, tattoos, missing limbs, etc.): Her left leg has a sleeve tattoo from half up thigh to ankle, designs are about flowers, chains, ice(trauma~~) and some little hints of hospital equipment used in a virus ward(gloves, goggles, hazard stuff etc.). She has no birthmark. She's got some scarring from cuts on her forearms and calves from interrogations and torture, Hypothermia scarring across her shoulder blades, down her back and bit and up her nape from her childhood(her mother was a bitch). A scar across her nose from a narrowly missed bullet. And a dot on her lower forehead(Taken from Chim in the LA 911 tv show) from a building collapse. Her only missing limb is a chunk of her right ear from bomb shrapnel. She has dimple piercings and a belly button ring.

Other (height & weight stuff, skintone, nationality, etc.): Her skintone is white with a slight tan, freckles and moles scattered about. She's Australian and has a strong origin in America, CA. He parents were from there and moved before she was conceived, so she was growing up in Australia. She is 6'1" (1.84m) and weighs 198lbs (89.8 kg). The only way I can describe her clothing style is simply grandma core, ugly sweaters, gardening cargo pants, and she loves her wood pendant jewelry. Keeps one on the chain with her dog tags.

Personality details: ↓

She's an open pansexual but is not on the ace or around spectrum. She is a cis woman, but struggles with gender dysphoria sometimes. She finds light purples like lavender quite pretty but will not admit that if there's a pretty red dress, she will try it on. Outside people describe her as passive aggressive, fast paced in both mind and body, and sweet. People she knows well however, describe her as snarky, a great topic changer, and loving. She is an ambivert, meaning basically that she needs interaction to function but needs isolation as well or else she begins disassociating and that never turns out well (haha trauma :') ). She's a bit of a picky eater and tends to herd towards fruity things like pies or fruit salad (her favorite food). She does have mental disorders, including PTSD and post-stockholm(?) basically she used to have Stockholm Syndrome but was saved and recovered (kinda).

And Military info!: ↓

She joined in 2005 at 18 years old, and was transferred to be in the SNS 5 years after joining. She has skills in Covert ops, Undercover missions, Hand to hand and knife combat, handgun techniques, and hostage rescue. But she has difficulties in longer range combat like sniper techniques, along with being a hostage, and trying to resist brainwashing if her captors know the techniques to use.

Basic picture using gacha (I use it to visualize what they will look like with color)

And I will insert a photo I drew below (it will not have color)

This is her second design as the first was not accurate to the way I saw her

I'm sorry if it's too long, read if you want but you really don't have to, she will be basically described in the fic.

#call of duty modern warfare #call of duty mwii #call of duty #call of duty oc #call of duty original character #cod mwii #cod mw2 #cod #cod oc art #cod ocs #cod original character #cod oc #mw2 oc #mw2 #mwii #mwii oc #Trill's OCs!

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bcofl0ve · 2 years

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what started in beautiful rooms pt.3 | an austin butler x priscilla actress!reader story ❀˖°

part 3/? • (part 2) | RATED M MINORS DNI

summary: “what happened between you and austin?” is a question you dread. it makes your gut twist, even if only proposed through a pointed look. the short answer is “a lot”. the long answer is more complicated.

word count: 3,420

warnings: implied past infidelity, age gap (reader is 21 when the story starts, austin is 28), unhealthy relationship dynamics, explicit smut, rough/angry sex, crying after sex

chapter summary: you knew acting out on him wouldn’t feel good in the morning, but certainly that was nothing you couldn’t retcon.

chapter soundtrack

i live for comments and love talking about my writing! pls feel free to come chat via anon (or off anon!) anytime. more than happy to share headcanons and what not (-:

xxx

January 5th, 2020 | Queensland, Australia

You’d almost forgotten what you did when you first woke up, until you turned your phone on to so many notifications it felt hot in your hand. There was a missed call from your manager, five texts from Bebe and four from Austin. You opened Bebe’s first, biting your lip as you read her encouragement not to dwell on what your Instagram comments were saying because she knew you’d crawl across broken glass before you helped someone cheat.

Right, Instagram. You opened the app before looking at the missed texts from Austin, holding your breath as you clicked onto the comment section. It was more or less what you’d expected, down to people saying crueler things about you than they were about Austin.

Speak of the devil, a fifth text came through from him before you could even open the others.

I get done at 9:00 tonight. Your place or mine but we need to talk and you can’t ignore me forever.

You clicked it open, reading the messages he’d sent last night and earlier in the morning.

Hey- not that you don’t look cute but I don’t think the photo in my shirt being up on your Instagram is a good idea.

I’m calling Vanessa first thing in the morning about a breakup statement, I promise.

??? Did you fall asleep?

Vanessa just ripped my fucking head off. Is your phone even on? Your manager is trying to get a hold of you too, called me and I told her I’m just as clueless here. What the fuck Y/N?

Squeezing your eyes shut and opening them again like it would make all of this magically go away, you opened Instagram back up and deleted the post. Tossing the phone off the side of your bed, you rolled back over and stuffed your head under your pillow.

You’d know what to do after a few more hours of sleep, surely.

---

Unfortunately three more hours of sleep didn’t magically equip you with an idea of what to do, or the guts to do anything short of ignoring everyone- save for shooting your manager a text about deleting the post.

You forced yourself out of bed to move into the living room, throwing on Netflix to distract from the notifications, grateful you hadn’t been needed at set today.

Austin called at 9:03, sounding almost a little surprised when you answered.

“Oh hey, not like I’ve been trying to get a hold of you all day or anything.” He said, voice tight. You bit back a sigh, poking at the box of takeout food you had sitting on your lap that you suddenly weren’t hungry for anymore. Austin kept talking even though you didn’t respond.

“I’m pullin’ out of the set lot right now, am I comin’ to yours?” He asked, and you bit the inside of your cheek for a second before giving him a half mumbled “Sure.”

He hung up after a clipped “Kay, bye.” and you tossed your phone down onto the couch, running a hand over your face.

Austin brushed past you without a greeting when he arrived, kicking off his shoes in the direction of the rack by the door, the boots landing against the floor with a thud. You had a half a mind to tell him not to stomp into your house like a pissed off toddler, but stopped short.

"I deleted the post." You said and Austin looked up, hand coming up to tug through his black locks, face hardened. "Coulda' done that last night instead of siccing my ex and everyone that's ever been a fan of her on my ass."

You hadn't poked around much for what anyone had been saying about Austin. And it wasn't that you didn't believe he was getting a tongue lashing, you just didn't have it in you to care. Turning to walk in the direction of the living room, you picked up the remote and turned the TV off, still holding it when you turned back to him to talk.

"You said that if something came out you could release a statement and it wouldn't be a problem."

Austin didn’t seem to like the sarcasm, rolling his eyes with a huff.

"Yeah- and that wasn't a free pass to go nuclear Y/N,” He replied, eyes wide as he gestured- talking with his hands. “Not just on me either, what you did was disrespectful to Vanessa and you know it."

His voice was bordering on a yell, and you were a combination of jarred by that, and pissed off about the deflecting.

"I disrespected Vanessa? You were her partner- you owed her your loyalty Austin, not me." You replied, matching his tone. "When she was ripping your head off- did you tell her about Novemberr?"

He seemed to deflate a bit at that, which answered your question before the flat "No,” he gave even left his mouth.

"Yeah- and I'm the one without respect." You scoffed, and Austin looked like he wanted to say something else but he just pressed his lips together in a tight line, arms folded. You quirked an eyebrow up at him.

"What? If you have something to say to me, let's hear it."

He shook his head, looking at you through narrowed eyes. “You’re a piece of work, you know that?’

Taking a step closer and uncrossing your arms, you looked at him squarely. You didn’t know if what you were about to do would translate, and it crossed your mind that it would be humiliating if it didn’t. But you were taking the shot while you had it.

"You have somewhere else to be, another secret girlfriend?" You asked, trying not to let the look that crossed his face steer you off path. "Or are you gonna stick around if I tell you you can take this," You continued, bringing a hand up to gesture at him. "Out on me."

Austin’s eyes widened for a moment, and he rubbed his chin- looking away for a second before he responded.

"I'm pissed- doesn't mean I wanna hurt you." He said cautiously, and if you weren’t after something here you probably would’ve found that sweet.

“'s okay, I think I earned it.” You tried. bobbing your head to the side as you softened your voice from the tone you’d just been taking with him.

His pupils darkened as he seemed to come around.

“You have the shirt around here somewhere?” He said, and you motioned to your bedroom with your head as you took a few slow steps backward in that direction, running a hand through your hair. He looked past you, voice low when he spoke again. “Put that on and nothin’ else, I’ll be there in a minute.”

---

You heard the bathroom door open and shut from your bedroom as you stripped down and grabbed his shirt from your laundry hamper, spritzing some of your perfume over it before you slipped it on and got into bed.

What felt like hours, but was probably closer to ten minutes, passed before Austin came into your room stripped down to his boxers, setting the rest of his folded up clothes on the dresser before you got a good look at him. His hard cock was pushing through the thin fabric of his Calvins, and you assumed he’d started without you when he was in the bathroom.

He swallowed thickly when he saw you sitting up against your headboard in just the Hawainn shirt, crossing the room and crowding into your space as he got in bed- pushing you down against the pillows.

“Who knew this shirt would cause all this trouble,” He whispered, rubbing the fabric between his fingers before he dove in to kiss you. He pushed your shirt open to grope your boobs as he tugged on your bottom lip with his teeth, his erection pressed against your thigh.

He pinched your nipple between two fingers, yanking his hand back abruptly when you whined into his mouth.

“You think you’ve earned that?”

You shook your head, Austin pulling back to tug down his boxers and discard them to the side. He stroked himself, smearing precum around with his fingers before bringing two of them up to your mouth, tapping on your bottom lip.

Opening your mouth just enough to suck on his fingers, you felt your sex throbbing as your gaze fell to where he was jacking himself off with his free hand, little breathy moans leaving his mouth as he watched you.

He pulled the digits out of your mouth when he was satisfied, trailing them down your body to your center, brushing over your clit enough to elicit a slurred “Aus,” before he pushed his index and middle finger into you. He was barely deep enough for you to clench around him, but just far enough that you writhed at the sensation when he gestured inside of you in a ‘come here’ motion.

When he pulled them out after a minute, he brought his hand up the base of your neck.

“All the prep you’re getting tonight, pretty girl, that okay?

So sweet even when you’d given him your blessing to be a dick, you thought absentmindedly.

“Said to take it out on me, I meant i-” You started, cut off by your own yelp when he pushed all the way inside with one swoop. It was overwhelming, bordering on painful, but you shifted your hips under him and tried to adjust. Inhaling sharply, you exhaled suddenly when he grabbed both of your wrists up in one hand and pinned them above your head.

He started to move without warning, his pace faster from the start than it normally was. You still felt impossibly tight as he drilled into your pussy relentlessly, grinding up against his pelvis, needing friction on your clit that wasn’t coming.

Austin chuckled, grabbing your chin with his hand that wasn’t occupied.

“You need something baby?” He muttered, slowing his thrusts enough to be able to talk, but slamming into you harder to make up for the change in pace. “Should’ve been good, good girls get their clit touched.”

You choked out an apology through moans as he fucked you into the matress, unable to keep from writhing underneath him- your body moving on it’s own accord.

“Stay fuckin still.” He muttered harshly, hand drifting down from where he’d been holding your face to your neck. And you tried your best to lay still, but even the slight pressure on your airway went straight to your arousal. Doing anything consciously, even willing yourself to not move- felt impossible.

You’d been expecting some reaction to that, and Austin pulled out, yanking you up by the wrists onto his lap as he sat back. He pushed you up so that you were on your knees straddling him, his own legs spread open.

“You wanna move?” He asked roughly, smacking the side of your hip. “Ride me then, show me how sorry you are for being a little brat.”

You squeezed your eyes shut as you sank onto him, your breath stuck in your throat as he pushed you down till you were filled to the hilt. He didn’t protest when your arms wrapped around his neck and for that much you were grateful, your grip on him tightening as you tried to readjust- and refind the angle he’d just been nailing you at.

He grabbed your hips to drive up into you and found it himself, groaning when your walls tightened around him as you started to move. Loud moans flew out of your mouth as you rode him- and you tried to grind your clit into his pubic bone.

Which took notice of that after only a few seconds, squeezing your hips so hard that his nails digging into your skin made you wince in pain. If he noticed, he didn't seem to care.

“Did I say you could get yourself off on me?” He huffed. “I’ll tell you when you can come doll.”

Swallowing, you tried to slow down your movements to keep yourself away from the edge. But how hard Austin was jackhammering up into you left no room for that- especially not when he brushed the pad of his thumb over your soaking clit.

He only stayed there for a few seconds before he yanked his hand back, wiping your arousal off on your cheek as he pulled you in by the neck to kiss him.

Growing overwhelmed, you paused to take a breath, about three seconds passing before Austin had his fingers wrapped around your throat, mumbling a harsh “Keep movin’” into your mouth. He pulled his hand away after a minute to kiss down your neck, grabbing a handful of your ass as he left a trail of marks you knew you’d have to put a pound of makeup on in the morning.

And you wanted to be good, wanted to wait until he gave you permission to come. But the combination of his dick pounding against your cervix and his fingers coming back down to circle your throbbing bundle of nerves made the coil in your stomach spring undone- completely out of your control.

“Fuck- Aus I can’t- ‘m- Oh,”

Your body shook as you climaxed, your release making a mess of the both of you as you moaned his name to your ceiling. Your walls hugged his cock and you heard him groan as he followed right after you, shooting off inside the condom with an animalistic growl.

Chest heaving, you almost flinched when he pulled his hand off your ass and grabbed your chin, turning it towards him- fingers pressing into your cheek.

“Dad- I told you to wait. You know how to listen?”

Managing a little nod, you felt tears pooling in your eyes, the grip he had on your face that was preventing you from looking away taking you from feeling bad to worse- and quickly.

You’d meant it when you asked him to take it out on you, but seeing him look at you with so much resentment now that you were starting to crash just made your chest tight.

“‘m sorry.” You croaked out and you saw realization- alongside guilt flash in Austin’s eyes before he dropped your chin like he'd been burned.

He moved back to pull out and you crawled off of him- swiping at your eyes.

“Shit- honey you should’ve told me if I was goin’ too far,” He said, looking almost scared to touch you.

“Austin I consented, I’m fine,” You started, taking a breath as you got out of bed and onto your feet. Austin let out a little sigh, scooting to the edge of your mattress, looking at you seriously. “You’re about to cry, you’re obviously not fine.”

You were touched that he cared- truly. But the longer he looked at you like a wounded baby deer the closer you got to really crying in front of him- something you still had enough shame to want to avoid.

“Just a little overwhelmed,” You said, grabbing your phone before taking a step closer to kiss him, nails coming up to lightly scratch at his cheek as you pulled away. “I promise.”

He didn’t look like he quite believed that. But you added something about wanting to shower and he let you grab pajamas out of your dresser and leave without protest, your head starting to hurt as you shut your bedroom door behind you.

You flicked the shower on the second you closed the bathroom door but didn’t get right in- taking a shaky breath and leaning against the sink counter as you looked at your phone. The first notification you saw was a text from Bebe, a follow up to missed call.

saw you deleted the post. everything okay? i’m in town for another few days if you want to come crash at mine and watch stupid movies and forget about austin while you still can. love you!

The notification under that was a DM message request from Instagram, the lump in your throat growing like a weed when you saw the username attached to it.

Vanessa.

The nausea that rolled through you was so strong it outweighed the curiosity in regards to what exactly she had to say to you and you swiped the notification away, putting your phone face down on the counter. You felt your chin wobbling as you got into the shower- and let a little sob escape into your hand as the water ran down your back.

It wasn’t that Austin had pushed too hard- if you were being completely honest you’d been into what you goaded him into, really into it.

It was that on top of the guilt about November you still hadn’t shaken, that had been inching it’s way to the front of your mind since Bebe told you to ignore your comments because she knew you’d never do that. On top of knowing Vanessa had been hurt enough to say God knows what directly to you. On top of your last few days of normalcy before Elvis really kicked into gear going to hell in a handbasket.

A part of you wished you could just will it all away, hop in a time machine and go back and stop yourself from auditioning- or even responding to the email from your manager about the casting notice.

But you couldn’t do that- or stay in the shower forever.

When you’d at least halfway collected yourself you got out and towel dried your hair before putting on the t-shirt and shorts you’d brought into the bathroom with you, glancing at your reflection in the mirror. Your eyes fell to the hickies littering the base of your neck and you ran your finger over them tenderly, your lips tugging into a bit of a smug smile. There was an upside to every down, afterall.

You padded back down the hallway to your room, and weren't exactly surprised to discover that Austin hadn’t left. In your absence he'd gotten redressed into the joggers and t-shirt he showed up, looking up from where he was scrolling on his phone when you came in.

"You can kick me out if you want. Just felt like it would be a douche move to leave when you were upset." He supplied, the anger that had been in his eyes just an hour ago replaced with something softer. You gave a little shake of your head, crawling into bed and sitting up next to him.

"I really am sorry- about the post." You started quietly, and he put his phone onto your nightstand as you talked. "Stupid of me to do something like that when I've been the one worrying so much about this," You gestured between the two of you. "screwing the movie over."

Austin nodded, waiting a second to make sure you were done before he spoke. “You’re not stupid,” He said softly, reaching out an arm to wrap it around your shoulders. You scooted a little closer to him on instinct, allowing your head to drop to his shoulder.

“And I'm sorry you felt like you had to do all that to get what you needed from me.” He continued, pressing a kiss to your hair as he squeezed your shoulder where his hand had come to rest.

“You’re my girl, don’t ever want you doubtin’ that.”

When the first three words left his mouth it felt familiar, and you realized after a moment it was because they echoed a scene in the movie, his voice slipping into a southern drawl that made it sound exactly like it had at the table read just a week ago.

And you weren’t sure how you felt about that. But it was sweet.

He was trying- and that’s what mattered. Mattered more than how the thought that he sounded more like Elvis Presley than the Austin you’d spent the last few months with made you feel.

You hummed an affirmative “Mhm,” into his skin as he reached around you to turn your bedside lamp off, laying all the way down and taking you with. Coming to rest with your head tucked into his neck, a leg wrapped around one of his, you closed your eyes as you listened to his heartbeat through his shirt- saying a silent prayer that the past day would be the closest you ever got to losing him.

xxx

tag list (tags don’t always work, i do my best!): @flwrs4aust @eliseinmemphis @burningpeacebasement @pennyroyalcreep @karamelcoveredolicity @gabrielajimenez @butlerslovebot @fallinlovewithurlove @l0v3lydes @slowsweetlove @houndogsblog

#me yelling dylan dylan no at my laptop at the end #this boy is going to be completely possessed by elvis at one point baby i'm so sorry #austin butler x reader #austin butler x priscilla actress reader #austin butler #olivia dejonge #austin butler fic #austin butler imagines #austin butler fanfic #austin butler headcanons

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