#atwq theory

[fifireadingcorner]

I feel like if we could pick out a candidate for the Kind Editor from the characters of All The Wrong Questions, it should be the Bellerophon brothers. After all, it is canon that atwq is a series of accounts that Lemony sent to them.

Why Is This Night Different from All Other Nights?, Front Page/Chapter Thirteen

They have been trusted by Lemony to keep important documents safe even before then, as with the papers in Colonel Collophon’s room in When Did You See Her Last?, and swapping out the books in the library in Shouldn’t You Be in School?

Another thing is that Lemony is also known to send his editor(s) through wild goose chases to find his work on the Baudelaires in various different locations, something which is normally not on an editor’s work requirements (unless of course, they’re a VFD associate or smth). Pip and Squeak, of course, are taxi drivers, and with them being the only source of public transport in the town since a young age, l could imagine that those skills could be put to good use in retrieving things in unconventional places.

TLDR: Pip and Squeak are two sub-(sub?) librarians who love to read, and also has the means of travelling while being trustworthy of holding confidential information, as well as a history of helping Lemony Snicket with such tasks, thus making them likely to be the Kind Editor if we were to refer to the characters of All The Wrong Questions.

[ven10]

What if Pip+Squeak crashed their dad’s taxi into the police car in ATWQ?? (Or maybe it was their dad who crashed and the injury he sustained in said crash is what he’s recovering from?) I am saying this bc both vehicles are dented so maybe they were damaged in the same accident…

[‘Evidence’ from ATWQ book 1 ‘Who Could That Be at This Hour?’]

[unfortunatetheorist]

Why would Lemony make Beatrice II trace the events of A Series of Unfortunate Events?

I was looking back at my theory that Beatrice II is Lemony's Kind Editor...

...then I thought: Beatrice is only 10 when she meets Lemony; if she really is the Kind Editor, why would Lemony put her through the undoubtedly excruciating pain of retracing the Baudelaires' steps?

This makes even less sense when one realises that Lemony is still on the run when he meets his niece Beatrice, and is using her to help clear his name, as well as those of the Baudelaires.

Well, quite simply, Lemony put Beatrice through (what is essentially a 're-enactment' of) the Baudelaires' steps of ASOUE for one reason: to expose her to the truth as early/as quickly as possible.

The reasoning is this:

1. Beatrice II asked for direct help, and Lemony is giving her just that, because she gives him a purpose in life. With Beatrice II, there is a reason for both him and his Baudelaire investigation to continue.

In this scenario, Lemony basically says to Beatrice II, "Here's what I've got so far; let's continue with what we have".

2. Beatrice II asking Lemony for help gives Lemony a chance to try and make up for all the wrong he has done/feels he has done. It provides him with an opportunity to make things right, to be a free man who helped reunite (and clear the names of!) his ex-fiancé's children and his niece.

It also gives him a chance to get one Beatrice that's dear to him to trust him - there is no doubt Beatrice II would've been investigating for a while before stumbling upon Lemony Snicket (her uncle) as part of her research. This makes one thing clear to Lemony: she has been looking for answers but no-one has been willing to give her the truth. Therefore, it's Lemony's job to provide her with the tragic details of what happened to the Baudelaires between their orphaning (wait, is that even a word?) and her birth, sparing none of the gory details. It's also entirely possible that Lemony sees Beatrice II as a either a female version of his younger - ATWQ - self, or a similar-acting replica of Moxie Mallahan.

With all due respect,

~ Th3r3534rch1ngr4ph, Unfortunate Theorist/Snicketologist

[library-child]

How Armstrong Feint became Hangfire

Re-reading ATWQ fueled my brainrot concerning the radicalization of Armstrong Feint. How did a loving father become a terrorist hell-bent on slaughtering children? So I did some research on common risk factors that can make people susceptible to terrorism and checked how they apply to Armstrong. Needless to say, this only made my brainrot worse. Anyway, here are the results.

Social isolation ☑️

The first risk factor is the lack of reliable social connections. You may be all alone or unable to open up emotionally to the people close to you. You might even have trouble interacting with other people in the first place. This can result in feeling alienated. There also is no one to support you when you are hurting or interfere when you start radicalizing.

While having only Ellington's limited and likely romanticized perspective on her life with her father, there are some hints Armstrong may have been lonely. He was a single parent who spent most of his time working alone in the wild. Ellington does say she contacted people who knew him, but she never mentions anyone but her father when talking about her past. This could imply they led a very isolated life. Also, Armstrong's enthusiasm about nature could have something to do with his having trouble getting along with other people. At least, he seemed to prefer plants and animals over people.

Hardship ���

Intense suffering makes you vulnerable in many ways. If you experience hardship and don't get support, you might become more susceptible to radical views/groups. That's what's so seductive about things like cults or terror organizations, after all: They promise you a community, a sense of belonging, and an easy solution for your problems.

Again, we don't know enough about Armstrong's past. He certainly must have been stressed out by being a single parent and the only bread-earner of the family. And he must have gotten into this position somehow. We never learn why Ellington's mother has never been in the picture. Furthermore, as a nature-loving person, he must have felt extreme anguish at the destruction of his home region caused by the flood. Not to mention the destruction of his hometown and the life he had built for himself.

There is also one intriguing aspect that doesn't get explored in the books, so it's purely speculative: the war that made Colonel Colophon a hero. We don't know when exactly this war happened or how involved the Snicket country was, but it does open the possibility that Armstrong's generation had to fight as soldiers.

Lack of perspective ❓

You're in a bad place and don't see a way out. You don't see the point anymore and don't know how you want to go on. Another allure of terrorism is providing you with a 'meaningful life'.

This one is tricky. Armstrong did have a purpose in the form of a young daughter whom he undoubtedly loved with all his heart. We don't know if or how he intended to reunite with her had he succeeded. We can only speculate if he fell into resignation. Perhaps he was shaken by the futility of his life's work after one tycoon's decision had undone it. Perhaps he realized Ellington was growing up and wouldn't need him in a few years.

Powerlessness and injustice ✅

This is relevant both on a social and individual level. When you live under corruption, tyranny, etc without a way to defend yourself, you're more likely to resort to terrorism. It's also relevant if you personally feel you're being treated unfairly and there's nothing you can do about it.

The social injustice is blatantly clear: Ink Inc. was allowed to destroy Killdeer Fields for profit, and its inhabitants could not prevent it. The flooding must have started several years before the beginning of ATWQ. Who knows what Armstrong and the rest of the town did to fight it, all in vain? We also see how corrupt and incompetent the institutions, such as the police, the official fire department, the press, and the legal system, are in the Snicketverse. This might have been a reason the V.F.D. became successful in the first place: They fixed the failed state.

Armstrong's individual perception is more obscure. He certainly realized he was a victim and probably became increasingly obsessed over this. He may have started out being rightfully outraged by the injustice done to him by Stain'd-by-the-Sea and shaken by his own helplessness. But eventually, he got stuck in this state of mind until he forgot he still had agency and responsibilities.

Over-simplified worldview ✅

You tend to view the world in clear black-and-white categories: You are always the hero, and the others are the villains. You're always the victim, the others the oppressors. You're never responsible for your actions; it's everyone else's fault. You lose touch with reality as you sink deeper into a super simple, convenient narrative of how the world works, and spreading terror and violence is the only right to do.

Hangfire displays this attitude during his conversation with Lemony in book 4. He only points out Stain'd-by-the-Sea's crimes without taking ownership of his own. He equates humanity to beasts trying to survive. There are no morals; every act of violence is just self-preservation. It's kill or be killed, meaning kill the children of Stain'd before they can repeat their parents' mistakes.

Conclusion

What can I say? These books have messed up my brain.

[somewhat-bored]

After the events of atwq, Ellington vowed to ruin Lemony’s life through destroying the only thing he deemed incorruptible, untainted by the treachery surrounding every aspect of his life, the only thing that made him happy:

Rootbeer floats.

She put an absurd amount of effort into this.  The diner Lemony goes to solely for the rootbeer?  She shut it down after anonymously reporting several health code violations.  Every rootbeer bottle Lemony gets from the store?  Thoroughly shaken by Ellington.  His ice cream?  She takes it out of the freezer and lets it melt, or if she’s feeling particularly evil she eats all of it and sticks it back into the fridge.

Lemony thinks that this is the behavior of other volunteers, ones who have no regard for the possessions of others.  It’s not until the Baudelaire mansion burns to the ground that Ellington reveals herself.

“Snicket.”

“Feint.”

“Your suffering brings me great joy.”

“You... you killed Beatrice?  You left their home in ashes just to get back at me.”

“What?  No, who are you even talking about?  I’ve been preventing you from having decent rootbeer floats for the past fifteen years.”

“...”

“If I was going to kill someone, it would be you.”

“My rootbeer... how could you?!”

“You don’t deserve rootbeer!”

“Ellington, that’s like saying you don’t deserve coffee!”

They proceed to have one of the most petty arguments recorded in history.

“And you know what?!  Your sister’s been helping me get my revenge the whole time!”

“Just because I killed your father?!  Does that warrant such atrocities?!  What did my rootbeer ever do to you?!”

[snicketstrange]

Untie My Silence Knot Chapter 6 - L, you're so clueless

I should have asked L those 13 questions directly when we met. I tried to convince myself several times that I had forgotten to ask. Then I tried to convince myself several times that this was no longer important. Then I tried to convince myself that it was better not to know the answers. After all, if he didn't answer me there must be a reason. Maybe he just ripped my letter up in an impulse of anger … But I can't imagine L doing such a thing. But I also can't imagine him not answering that letter. And after that, still having the courage to show up here … How could he have had the courage to do that without answering those questions?

I went back to the library and got my copy of Ivan Lachrymose - Lake Explorer. I opened it between pages 302 and 303 and took out a card that L had given me. I never really understood what L had done while in Stain'd-By-The-Sea. But whatever it was, now it was time to collect some favors in his name.

I didn't find B at the mansion for the rest of the afternoon. The children were busy with their affairs, and it was soon dark. B must have left, as I didn't even see him in his room. I checked if he was in the secret tunnel, and not. The car was still in the garage. If he had left, it must have been on foot, by rental carriage, or by taxi. That was awful. I couldn't go out and leave the children alone.

I decided to call Violetta.

I talked to her about the plant I had found.

Do you have the antidote at the hospital? - I asked.

Yes, we do. Are you sure you want to continue with this?

Yes, I am. It is now or never.

Then, I decided to call the Royal Gardens, since I couldn't go there at the moment. The woman I needed to speak with would be finishing work soon. I asked the operator to call Miss K., chief scientist at the Royal Gardens.

Miss K?

Yes. It's her. But K is my maiden name. I got married recently.

I'm calling to ask a very important favor.

Who is talking?

Unfortunately I can't identify myself. But we have a mutual friend named L.

And what might his last name be?

Snicket.

I'm sorry. I don't trust phone calls.

C, I have a card that L gave me. L told me that if I gave you the card, you could do me a favor.

What kind of favor would you want me to do?

I need you to find a certain plant there for me.

Which plant?

Conium Maculatum.

This plant is in the Poisonous Pavilion .. No sample of the plant can leave here.

If this plant could be legally removed I would not need to be charging you a favor in the name of L.

Bring the card here. If it's really true, I'll help you. But I want you to know that L is helping you to commit a crime, whoever you are.

I heard the noise of B coming.

I have to turn off. Please wait for me at the entrance around 10:30 pm. Tonight.

B came into the house. I went to greet him.

Where have you been, dear? I was worried about you…

Are the kids in their rooms?

Yes, they are. Way?

I don't want them to see their mother making up a lot of lies to justify that.

He brought a file of letters. It was the file of letters L had sent me.

So you went to E.'s house. I don't understand … He promised that he would never show this file to anyone but me.

It seems that your brother also breaks the trust that others have in him. It must be a family problem.

I am not going to lie B. I couldn't get rid of these letters. You know L and I had a history together. As much as you want to undo this story, you can't go back in time and erase what I lived with him.

I'm not talking about the past, B. If you love me, burn those letters in the fireplace now, in front of me.

I will not do it. But that doesn't mean that I don't love you!

Some things in an actress's life are difficult to understand unless you're an actress, an actor, or you live in constant disguise. My secret was to write about it. I hate to write that it didn't work for me. I no longer knew what was pretend and what was real. But I knew that the tears that started to fall in an amazing volume of my eyes were real. I wanted to shout something but I didn't know what words to shout! From the bottom of my heart a feeling gradually materialized in the form of words. The words were "Forgive Me, please". I started to sob. Who was I trying to apologize to? To B? To L? To my children? To O's Father? To my parents? To myself?

I never wanted a hug as much as I did in that moment. But nobody came to hug me. L was not there, as I did not marry him. My parents were not there because they had died. My kids were sleeping, because I couldn't be honest with them about how I really felt or what my life was like. My friends were scattered around the world on dangerous missions. And my husband … My husband didn't come to hug me even though he was in front of me.

I wish my parents were alive so I could call them to ask for help in my marriage. I didn't want them to have been murdered for being involved in VFD. I wish I had spent time with them and not gone far, and not even being able to say goodbye to them. I wanted to go to a normal school, fall in love with normal schoolmates, and be disappointed like any normal girl. I wanted to choose who to marry, and I wanted to have a normal marriage. I wanted to have normal fights with my husband. I came to the library, got my commonplace book from the secret drawer. I came to the tunnel and recorded these latest events. I'll call a taxi and meet Miss K. I'll leave it behind this brick, which is a secret compartment in the tunnel. I don't know if anyone will ever find what I wrote here, but I hope so. My life has become a tangled knot. Now I'm going to control something for myself.

__________________________

Confidential.

Note to the Archive: Please add this writing to the Snicket File.

Preferably on page 9.

J.

[library-child]

Wow! Excellent thoughts!

Thought: Maybe the main reason so much tragedy happened in Lemony's life was because he and Jacques were on drastically different sides of the Schism and nobody really realized it. Also, Lemony put that lock on the door to VFD headquarters as a way to sabotage VFD by making sure nobody could use the training facility (which would mean they would call off the kidnapping.)

Last part first: I assume you mean the Vernacularly Fastened Door to the Headquarters in the Mortmain Mountains? That doesn't make any sense.

Here is how Quigley initially explains the door:

“That's what I read,” the scout confirmed looking at a page in his notebook. “You're supposed to type in three specific phrases in a row. The phrases change every season, so volunteers need to have a lot of information at their fingertips to use this door. The first is the name of the scientist most widely credited with the discovery of gravity.”

Though I think there is a lot of evidence towards Quigley not being terribly well informed about VFD, and specific bits of his information being wrong (especially around the surviver of the fire), there's no reason for Lemony to be concealing his motives at this point in the story if he was trying to sabotage volunteer training, and Vernacularly Fastened Door seem to be a fairly common VFD security measure as Volunteers are expected to know a wide variety of trivia relative to Fire Starters and the general public and be able to use informal information networks to have the information to open the doors, so one wouldn't use a Vernacularly Fastened Door to keep Volunteers away from something.

But since it's my blog, I'm going to take the opportunity to talk about something mostly related to the first part of your ask: where does Jacques fall relative to his siblings in the VFD schisms?

So, to start with, it's really common fanon that Jacques Snicket is the most loyal to VFD, and the one who most needs to rationalize VFD's more shady practices. He is also deeply invested in protecting his siblings at the expense of practically anything else. The second part is pretty inarguable fact, but I think the first part may not be the most compelling interpretation of the facts.

I think this assessment of J comes primarily from two pieces of information: (1) L explains in his assessment of the Snicket Lad that J said they were allowed to finish their tea first, and (2) J feels a need to point out that VFD "asks first" before taking children from their homes. But, I think these are both just statements of fact. VFD does ask first. It does matter. I think it's very important to him to separate anti-VFD propaganda from the very real danger VFD puts it's members in.

A better assessment of J's character is that he is just about solely focused on protecting other people. This usually dovetails with VFD's mission statement and what the organization asks of him. But I think he might be the most clear headed about the reality of VFD--in both the good and bad that it does. He is trying to protect Jerome and his siblings from the downsides of being involved with VFD.

The things we really know about J's VFD related behavior is that he is trying to get information from Olivia about where is brother is, he arranges for L to escape after the debacle following his theatrical review and seems to be serving as a go between for L and VFD and the Daily Punctillio, he was investigating the fire at the Royal Gardens (probably to try and clear L's name, as referenced in the footnotes of the Rare Addition of the Bad Beginning), he was following Count Olaf to VFD (almost certainly for the same reason), and he writes a wildly inaccurate article about the Antwhistle Aquatics fire (which I realized while thinking about what I wanted to say in this post) likely motivated to protect K from consequences of her involvement.

So, J is motivated by protecting people, especially his siblings. And his desire to protect them from VFD is something he's aware of, and not a source of internal conflict. J's side of the schism is "I must protect my siblings and clean up their messes", while K and L are driving forces in the sugar bowl plot with R, B, and B. Likely, this grew out of the subsection of Volunteers who wanted to reform VFD, which does not include J--not because he is a loyalist to the organization but because he is, in a lot of ways, risk adverse and has a very narrow view of how much good you can do before the negative and unattended consequences of your actions come back to bite you.

So, yes, J and L are sort of on different sides of the internal to the Volunteers schisms, but I don't think that has much, or really anything, to do with the tragedies that L experiences.

[eyesteeth]

Time for another ATWQ theory. This theory contains MAJOR SPOILERS for the entirety of the fourth volume, so tread with caution. Content warnings for semi-graphic discussions of violence. Long post. I cannot stress how long this post is.

I think Ellington killed Qwerty.

Qwerty’s death is perplexing. His neck wound has thrown me off for years. It’s deep and it’s prominent enough to produce a “terrible stain“. And yet, we’re told the weapon that did him in was a poison dart, shot by Stew Mitchum. I don’t believe this. I believe Qwerty was as good as dead before Stew even had the chance to shoot.

The order of events

Let's break the scene down.

More murmuring, more rattling. “… a good evaluation,” Theodora finished, in the same voice she’d used to make me go to bed early. “You haven’t earned a good evaluation,” Qwerty said sharply. “I’ll tell you what I’ve earned,” Theodora said, and then she said something else I couldn’t hear, in the quiet tone. Qwerty heard it, though. The librarian now sounded less steady and precise and more frightened and anxious, or perhaps I was hearing my own fright and anxiety. “What are you doing?” he cried, and then there was a loud, shattering noise that sounded so close I thought the bottle had broken against my ear. Qwerty screamed, a wild, loud sound he never would have allowed in his library, and then I don’t know exactly what happened next because I dropped the bottle. “What is it?” Moxie asked me. “What’s going on?” “Let’s find out,” I said, moving to the door. “I can’t,” Moxie said. “I need to lie low, remember?” I remembered and said so, then hurried out of the compartment and found myself in a narrow corridor, clattering with the noise of the train and full of nobody but me. (ATWQ4, Chapter 4)

So, in order:

Qwerty exclaims "What are you doing?"

The window breaks

Qwerty screams

Lemony drops the bottle

Lemony enters the room several seconds later

This is very interesting to me, especially because Qwerty asks his question before the window breaks. I'd imagine that the window would break first, then he'd ask the question, and then he'd scream.

Qwerty's exclamation

“What are you doing” is an odd thing to say when a child comes in through your window. To me, it would make far more sense to say something like “What is he doing here” or simply “What the hell”. “What are you doing” is a phrase that seems directed at someone in the room, someone who Qwerty could see and could hear him. Taking context into account, this sounds directed at Theodora - she tells him something in a low voice, he reacts with fear, he is found dead. But I believe this to be a red herring. Because, as we find out later, there was someone else in the room - Ellington.

That's not how poison darts work

“I saw S. Theodora Markson shoot Dashiell Qwerty with a poison dart.” “You did no such thing,” I said. (ATWQ Chapter 6)

“Hangfire lurks in the background,” I reminded her, “imitating people’s voices and making mysterious phone calls. He doesn’t do anything himself.” Ellington poured the coffee. “Well, this time he did,” she said. “He shot Qwerty with a poison dart and threw the weapon out the window. Then he slipped into a nearby compartment and frightened the librarians into serving as false witnesses.” (ATWQ Chapter 8)

“I’m sure it was heartbreaking,” I said, “for the law to do something so lawless. But they were protecting someone important to them—their darling little boy. It was Stew Mitchum who clung to the railings of The Thistle of the Valley, shot Dashiell Qwerty with a poison dart, and then escaped into a compartment full of librarians scared into hiding the truth.” (ATWQ Chapter 11)

Over and over, when it comes to the murder, everyone agrees that it was a poison dart.

We all love our poison darts. A major reveal in TPP, and now they’ve come back again, like history rhyming. But a poison dart should not leave a neck wound like that. In the Netflix adaptation of TPP, there’s a small prick, and then Olaf’s father falls over. There is no blood involved.

Poison darts also have a very small tip. Even if Stew had missed his shot and the dart had run across Qwerty’s throat instead of hitting the side, I don’t think the wound would have been deep enough to kill. It would have bled if the angle was right, but what Qwerty’s death is described as sounds much more like a throat slash than a dart shot. 

Imagine a throwing dart. Imagine throwing that dart to a dartboard. Now imagine how precisely someone would have to stand between you and the dartboard in order to have it run the length of their throat but not get stuck in the side. Now imagine trying to do that in a moving train car, with you on the outside of the train. Not only is it a highly improbable (if not outwardly impossible) shot, even a poison dart shot from a dart gun would not be able to go that deep.

Your honor, that was not the murder weapon.

Even if it was I don't think Stew couldve made that shot anyway

I read for quite some time before I was distracted by a noise that sounded like a rock being thrown against the wall, just above my head. I looked up in time to see a small object fall to the table. It was a rock, which had been thrown against the wall, just above my head. It would be nice to think of something clever to say when something like that happens, but I always ended up saying the same thing. “Hey,” I said. “Hey,” repeated a mocking voice, and a boy about my age stuck his head out from behind a shelf. He looked like the child of a man and a log, with a big, thick neck and hair that looked like a bowl turned upside down. He had a slingshot tucked into his pocket and a nasty look tucked into his eyes. “You almost hit me,” I said. “I’m trying to get better,” he said, stepping closer. He wanted to tower over me, but he wasn’t tall enough. “I can’t be expected to hit my target every time.” (ATWQ1, Chapter 4)

While Stew may be morally capable of shooting a man (we see him go from firing rocks at birds to physically beating Lemony in the span of a few months), he may not be physically capable. Standing still, Stew Mitchum failed to shoot Lemony with a slingshot. And given that Stew was supposedly climbing on the outside of a moving train before swinging in through a window and taking the shot, I call bullshit. This would require an insane amount of coordination and skill, which Stew does not have.

Putting it all together

So, if it wasn't Stew, then it was either Ellington or S. I already believe S didn't do it. She wanted something from Qwerty, and killing him was only going to make her evaluation worse. She wasn't above threatening him, but I believe she was above killing him.

“Ellington Feint and Dashiell Qwerty shared Cell One,” Moxie said, typing it as she realized it, and then she stopped and looked at me. “She must have killed him.” I thought of Ellington dangling out the window of the train, and shook my head. “I know how you feel about Feint,” Cleo said to me. “We all do, Snicket. But if Theodora is not the murderer, then Ellington Feint must be. There was no one else in the compartment.” (ATWQ4 Chapter 11)

So it comes back to this. If it wasn't Stew from outdoors, and it wasn't Theodora from inside, it has to have been Ellington. And I believe I have the motive.

I sat up in bed and quickly turned the light on. I knelt beside the old-fashioned phonograph and looked carefully at it. It could be anybody’s, I told myself. It looks like Ellington Feint’s, but that doesn’t mean it is. I picked it up and turned it over and then saw a word, just one word stamped into the machine, right where the arm with the needle lay waiting to make the music play. It was the wrong word. It made me take three steps back. (ATWQ3, Chapter 5)

“I believe Hangfire would kill Ellington Feint if he could,” I said with a shiver, “and Ellington knows it.” (ATWQ4, Chapter 11)

Ellington likely knows Hangfire is her father, she just doesn't want to admit it to herself. She uses the phonograph far more than Lemony does, and if he knows, so does she. And if she also knows that he could kill her without much hesitation, then that gives her reason to get into his good graces.

And then there’s the one, I thought, who has stolen more sleep from you than all the rest. Ellington Feint, like me, was somewhat new in town, having come to rescue her father from Hangfire’s clutches. She’d told me that she would do “anything and everything” to rescue him, and “anything and everything” turned out to be a phrase which meant “a number of terrible crimes.” (ATWQ4, Chapter 1)

Who's to say she didn't work her way up to murder?

A hypothetical scene

So, Ellington and Qwerty are in the same cell. Kit is in the other cell. S is talking to Qwerty. The Mitchums are present. Here's what I think could have happened.

While Qwerty and S are talking, Ellington comes at him. He yells "What are you doing?", a statement directed at the person sitting next to him, and not someone coming through the window. Stew comes in, ready to attack, but this serves more as distraction than anything. Ellington, with a weapon actually meant to cut a throat, gets at Qwerty and he screams. Outside, Lemony drops the bottle, avoiding the sound of Qwerty's death gurgles.

Then, Ellington's deal with the Mitchums becomes silence about Stew's involvement as opposed to Stew murdering someone. She leaves, and likely discards the weapon out the window like everyone assumed Stew did with the darts. Stew does his threatening and Ellington slinks off, leaving Theodora, the Mitchums, and Kit in the room. Theodora is too stunned to speak, possibly rethinking her choices up to this point, the Mitchums are kept silent by their son, and Kit does not have anything to say.

Events on the train carry out as they do, the second conspiracy unfolds, Hangfire is revealed and then subsequently killed, and then eventually Kit and Ellington wind up in the same cell, shaking hands, two orphans who have been taught to kill.

How it works thematically

ASOUE and ATWQ both convey unreliable narration in different ways. ASOUE is a man reconstructing events he was not present for, and ATWQ is a man looking back on one of the most traumatic events of his childhood. He’s bound to get things wrong in both, and I believe that he is wrong about this scene because he’s falling into the biases he had when he was young.

It would be easy for him to assume that Stew killed Qwerty. It's easy for the audience to assume it, too. We know Stew's history of violence and his hatred towards Qwerty. It makes sense if you don't look too deep into it. The whole event was incredibly stressful, and Lemony was still so very young. Even if he had come to a different conclusion, he may not have wanted to consider it. It’s possible that these inconsistencies are the result of him wanting to tell the facts of what happened while also not wanting to acknowledge that Ellington killed Qwerty.

Or maybe I’m just overthinking things :]

[beatricebidelaire]

i do not ship lemony with ellington but i do frequently think about that post that was like, with atwq we see that as much as lemony loves beatrice, the way we see in asoue, as if she's his whole life, one true love, the only one ever, we see in atwq that there was once upon a time someone else. and to some degree i really get it. it's also, a bit like the rest of the atwq tone, of how it's bigger than what we originally see. the world is bigger than vfd, with other troubles to solve. there are other people than the volunteers and firestarters with their problems they're battling. lemony snicket and his associates outside of the vfd. before this one true love there was some teenage crush, someone else. everything's bigger and more, it's not just what we saw in asoue. if that makes sense. it's also why even though i like the moxie as editor theory, i also like it if she's not. because the thing about atwq is that the world is bigger than that.

[afterthegreatunknown]

random but do you have any headcanons/theories about gifford and ghede?

I don't mind the randomness, anon! I like getting asks!

Gifford and Ghede are some of the characters in the series (ASOUE and ATWQ combine) I don't think much of. To me, because they were introduced as a duo, I see them as a 'two-in-one' deal of a character. So the headcanons I have of them is...short. Really short:

Almost never seen without one another in public. You think Gifford is alone eating lunch on a bench? Surprise! Ghede shows up with her lunch to join him. You certain Ghede is watching television by herself? Nope! Gifford jumps over the sofa to sit beside her.

Gifford takes very good care of his mustache (thanks ATWQ illustrations), and keeps a spare mustache comb on hand.

Ghede loves the hear the drama going on among associates. She's a nosy sorts; if it's drama about her least associates, she shares it.

Unknown to the organization, Gifford and Ghede know they're thought of as the worst volunteers of their generation, but they really do try their damn best to be volunteers of the organization.

I don't have any theories about them, honestly. I don't vibe with the theory that they're possibly TMWBBNH and TWWHBNB, even though I get the logic behind. Really I think Ghede and Gifford by ASOUE are in a nice little 'retirement' together because if they're to be lazying around with someone, they do it with their partner of many years (romantically? platonically? I haven't decide yet).

Thank you so much for the ask, anon! Do drop in whenever you feel like it!

[fifireadingcorner]

Hello! So, do you personally have any theories about asoue, or do you believe in any peculiar ones?

Oh, my first ask-

Well I'm not really much of a theorist and I'm more of a theory reader than a maker. I also just got back into reading Lemony Snicket stuff again since I was busy with my studies previously. I did make this one post on how the editor that helps Lemony in asoue are Pip and Squeak from atwq though.

[just-an-enby-lemon]

I always always always wanted to read all snicketverse books in order (and in english because while the portuguese traslantion did it's best they gen couodn't keep some puns and codes andbsecret meanings also not all snicketverse books even got translated) at once so I would feel confident enough about writing a fic about the famous theory that says the winter trip Lemony remembers was Jacob and E. Snicket trying to rescue their kids from VFD except this fic is an AU they managed and are raising their kids on the run.

(Also a shcicharoo because I do think the Snickets would fare better in ASOUE and the Baudelaires would have made the right questions in ATWQ [and more important the Baudelaires would never ever have the misscomunication sibbling problem the Snickets had, this kids talk to each other!]).

[unfortunatetheorist]

Could the 'S' stand for Sugar?

To parody Olivia Caliban - "I've been doing some thinking"

The theories among the fandom surrounding S. Theodora Markson have been logical, but in this theory, I'm going to drop a new [what I'm quite sure is a] bombshell, in answer to 'What does the 'S' stand for?' - the S might stand for Sugar.

Of course, as mentioned, I respect and understand the reasoning behind the alternative theories, such as 'Sunny' and 'Sensible', but there is a link that I seem to have found, which MIGHT run across the Snicket-verse [one that, I feel, seems to have been a little bit overlooked]:

Sugar is an incredibly delicate subject to come up in A Series of Unfortunate Events.

This is CLEARLY seen in 2 main instances:

The Waitress is a woman who was employed in The Penultimate Peril, who had a customer that requested sugar in their coffee before she threw him onto the ground so she could see if he had a tattoo on his ankle. Much like last time (referring to her employment at Café Salmonella), she discovers that the customer had no such tattoo so she then apologized for her actions and offered a free slice of rhubarb pie for all his trouble. Her fate after the incident remains unknown, though even if she was the same waitress from Café Salmonella, her employment at both eateries were most likely terminated nevertheless.

(from the Snicket Fandom Wiki, under 'The Waitress' page)

“What is this?” Count Olaf said suspiciously, peering into his coffee cup. “It looks like coffee, but it’s freezing cold!” “And what is this orange stuff?” Esmé asked suspiciously. “I want fashionable, in food, not a handful of ice!” Colette picked up a piece of the bread and stared at it suspiciously. “This toast feels raw,” she said. “Is it safe to eat raw toast?” “Of course not,” Hugo said. “I bet that baby is trying to poison us.” “Actually, the coffee isn’t bad,” one of the white-faced women said, “even if it is a little bitter. Could someone pass the sugar, please?” “Sugar?” shrieked Count Olaf, erupting in anger. He stood up, grabbed one end of the blanket, and pulled as hard as he could, scattering all of Sunny’s hard work. Food, beverages, and dishes fell everywhere, and Sunny had to duck to avoid getting hit on the head with a flying fork. “All the sugar in the world couldn’t save this terrible breakfast!” he roared, and then leaned down so that his shiny, shiny eyes stared right into Sunny’s. “I told you to make a nice, hot breakfast, and you gave me cold, disgusting nonsense!” he said, his smelly breath making a cloud in the chilly air. “Don’t you see how high up we are, you sabertoothed papoose? If I threw you off Mount Fraught, you’d never survive!”

(An extract from The Slippery Slope, Ch 6)

Given the sheer force with which people [volunteers (the waitress) and villains (Olaf) alike] in the series (ASOUE) respond to any mention of sugar, who's to say that the people of All The Wrong Questions take any reference to sugar in the same manner (i.e. flip out like ASOUE people)?

Of course, this is axiomatic (a word which here means: we're assuming this to be true) but if it is, it could be the reason why Theodora is so very secretive about her initial - maybe it stands for Sugar, and she doesn't want to run the risk of anyone knowing; the recipient of the information may be a villain... OR, seeing as she's 52nd out of 52 chaperones (or something like that, it has been a while since I've read ATWQ), if she tells V.F.D. her name is Sugar, she's BOUND to get kicked out of the organisation.

¬ Th3r3534rch1ngr4ph, Unfortunate Theorist/Snicketologist

P.S. I did get it right: On the list of chaperones, she is ranked 52nd of 52, though she believed she was ranked tenth

(Snicket Wiki)

[library-child]

ATWQ suggests Kit has become a parental figure for Lemony from a very young age. This may have influenced her inability to look after herself or to know her limits, always making sure everyone and everything around her is doing well. She has taken a role she couldn't possibly live up to because there was no reliable adult parent figure around.

[echoesagain]

#7

Here we go again! I’m finding myself bouncing between here and Reddit more and more these days. I can tell because I now know more about ASOUE and ATWQ than I ever thought possible. And I know even more about ASOUE theories than either of those (thanks SnicketSleuth). But damn, Handler knew what he was doing when he wrote those, the massive plot is insane. I might have to go re-read the unauthorised biography again for the umpteenth time…

Anyway, back to my life, because we all like to hear about an extremely self-centred, cynical 18 year old who has a compulsion to change the world. Be it through good or bad means, I don’t particularly care, I just want to make an impact and for it to be felt. I want to be somebody, somebody who is known. Self-centred, I know, I already said that. The problem is, it’s difficult to do. I could write the most amazing book ever, paint the greatest portrait or say the most amazing speech but still no one would know who I am because half of everything is being in the right place at the right time. That’s the key to success, knowing exactly where you fit in and when you should go for it. Opportunity knocks and you have to be there when it does. Or create another one, whichever’s easier. Anyway, that’s all the incredible, ground-breaking wisdom for today, now it’s time for the angst. Today’s topic- sexuality (or lack of). Basically, I had my first sexual encounter the other day and now I really don’t want anything like that to ever happen again. It’s possible that the fact I wasn’t attracted to him may have skewed my opinion but still, I really don’t want to do it again. Maybe I’m not attracted to guys after all, maybe I’m ace, maybe I haven’t found the right person yet or maybe I’m anhedonic. Who knows and who cares? Well me, obviously but I doubt anyone else does so I’ll end the angst there and move onto finishing thoughts.

So that was number 7, written while listening to a depressing playlist, featuring Motion Picture Soundtrack, O Children and The Beauty Regime. Some very depressing songs and one with a slightly uplifting ending. Still, I’m not stopping this blog anytime soon. I’ll either end it at #231, when I die or when I finally find happiness. Whichever happens first, I have no idea. Adios!