#at least keep it consistent man
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wanting to talk about my favorite food but not being able to write it in english but ik for a fact that however google translate is transliterating it is definitely wayyyy off
#like what happened to the “guh” and where tf did the “ka” come from??#also why isn't the pronunciation of it also the transliteration or translation or wtvr it is#either way it's not right but still??#at least keep it consistent man#i can never talk to my friends about my fav foods bc of that#just say some random thing that americans know#cuz then i don't have to worry about typing it or explaining what it its#but it's delicious ughhh#screw translation apps that suck at arabic#this is specifically about them#☆— yapping
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I'm always a little weirded out by just how much both the movies and the fandom gloss over how utterly uncomfortable Padme was with being around Anakin in the beginning of AotC. Like, this is a woman who grew up under a microscope from the time she was 14, but she still goes so far as to cover all the cameras in her room, knowing that a bounty hunter is after her and just murdered one of her handmaidens, because Anakin watching her creeps her out so much.
And yeah, most of that is because the movies forget about it too in favor of reducing her character to "girl in forbidden love", but still. It's so deeply clear in the first half of the movie just how much Anakin makes Padme uncomfortable. Like. to wild degrees.
#reason 13543 why I have to believe there was at least SOME mental influence going on to get her to ignore that many red flags#at least if we're trying to keep her characterization at all consistent with tpm#kat rants#idk man it just always stands out to me so starkly#maybe because i've been that uncomfortable around people before and ended up in bad relationships when i didn't listen to my instincts#it resonates#padme amidala#star wars#anti anidala
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i feel extra awful today n weak and i went downstairs n both my mom and my sister the first thing they said when they saw me was that i look pale o(-< whihc i dont even know how they can tell when i am literally always some form of purple
#but man i wish someone would hit me w a tranq shot#i just want out for a bit#pushed myself a lil too hard yesterday i think#but ive honestly been feeling worse lately for a long time#i say like i dont feel consistently worse . literally Always#my wisdom tooth still harms me everyday#i cant open my mouth barely at all#and my whole jaw is so tense 24/7 i feel like its draining my power#it's me fnaf keeping the doors down#also tw sh#but i have multiple open wounds that i have to pick dirt out of by hand everyday#because i dont have anything to use as a bandage#and they hurt so bad because i for some reason made the choice to do them on both legs#trying 2 sleep is a nightmare#i just want them to get scabs already but theyre taking so long#they refuse theyre just staying open#one of the slightly smaller ones did and honestly now it hurts more JHBJH.. because it's so tight any movement pulls on it'#and its so inflamed because of that#but at least it is better than just Ravine
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In case it's hard to read/understand: "If I had a nickel for every time I had a story with a blonde girl named after a plant, who has a German father and a French mother but absolutely hates said mom, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice."
weird, extremely-specific tropes in my stories: pt 1
#oc liveblogging#ughhhhhhh i really CANNOT afford to be procrastinating rn but i know this happens when im extremelyyyyyy fucking stressed.#creative/art related classes always get me for this reason bc ill use 'wait but i need to find inspiration!' as an excuse to procrastinate.#fuckkkkkkkkkk. UGH IM NOT EVEN WRITING SOMETHING FROM SCRATCH ITS JUST A FINAL REVISION BUT IM CONVINCED IT SUCKS#the worst part is hkjhkjGHKJ I HAVE TO PRESENT SOME OF THIS SHIT AT AN. INTERNATIONAL FUCKING CONFERENCE GUYS. GUYSYSSSS#anyways this post is sadly not related to that. nothing im presenting is related to my ocs [un]fortunately lmao#ive just been thinking rotating various oc stories around in my head again ourgghhhh.#and i realized this LMAO. i mean maybe technically not 2 separate stories anymore because im recycling a lot from one for the other?#one of these was already established lowkey and the other was something i made for an assignment for a class like 2 years ago#i actually don't know if petunie will be blonde in her final incarnation?? ive always imagined her as silvery blonde ig but idk#if ill keep that. she doesnt have proper colors like colin but at least colin has his design set more straight somewhat.#and all the recent petunie development is lowkey really fucking funny to think abt. i girlbossed with her character development so#hard that she really replaced lucian as a protagonist HAHAJSDHKGJ. ok well not 100% kamille's story is a shoot-off#of lucian's technically? i guess? it started becoming that and now its solidified as that lowkey bc same town same place time period people#but man if im not careful i might accidentally make kamille/petunie's arc THE default one and lucian's main one the offshoot instead#a lot remains to be seen. but also yeah the other one who's story is mostly getting recycled (myrtille) actually ALSO HAD HER MOM#COME FROM THIS SAME FUCKING PLACE BASICALLY. a few decades later but still bruh given developments for lucian's story too its just like#at this point im noticing a pattern man wtf is wrong w/ women who come from this town specifically lol. 😔🥴#this town in general is just fucking cursed though i think ahkjshkg. i mean that jokingly and literally lolololl i gotta. work on it. but y#I HATE IT HERE WHY ARE WEIRD LITTLE FUCKING TOWNS WHERE BAD SHIT HAPPENS ALWAYS A CONSISTENT TROPE IN MY STORIES /silly#I DONT EVEN COME FROM A WEIRD LITTLE TOWN MY HOMETOWN IS LIKE. AVERAGE NORMALISH NOT SUPER LARGE??? IDFK?????#haaaaaaa fuck i need to finish this by the end of TODAY I S2G!!! SO I CAN MOVE ON TO ALL THE OTHER SHIT I OWE FUCKKKK
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God, this is fucking crazy
So i only have 3 more classes to take, but it'll cost the same to take 3 classes as 4 classes. So I've been thinking about taking a 4th class just for the hell of it. Something fun and/or easy.
Out of curiosity, I looked up orchestras. I was in it in my first year, but I haven't consistently played since 2016. But I still dream about being in an orchestra again. I *miss it*. So I was like. Well, what if *that* was my 4th class next semester? What If?
I looked it up. This week is the last week they're doing auditions for it. There was only one more spot free after today. And that's *tomorrow evening*.
I haven't really played my violin much in YEARS. I'm so out of practice. But apparently they don't reject anyone outright. Auditions are just for placement. So worst case scenario, I get placed in an orchestra at a lower skill level than I was at my prime. It'd still be an orchestra.
It's crazy short notice, but I don't think I'd forgive myself if I passed it up. Bc I have just one more semester before I graduate. One last opportunity to be in a school orchestra. And if I didn't do this, I'd be left with that What If forever.
So. Crazy short notice, but I have a violin audition tomorrow!!! Hahahaha
#speculation nation#im literally shaking with nerves rn but i want this so so so badly#i remember. how to play. my arms are just so much stiffer than they used to be. and my nails. man im gonna have to trim my fucking nails#at least my left hand. kinda sucks bc i like the polish i have on rn but u cant have any long nail at all for violin.#i need to play two scales of my choosing. ascending and descending in three octaves.#recommended for violin is A C or E-flat major. of course i know A and C but i'd have to look up E-flat. never did much with flats in school#then again i have that One Two Three and a Half rhythm Down. thats how id often warm myself up.#start with the base G string and just do a scale up and down (one octave). go up to the next note. do it again.#again and again until i started running out of room on the E string. & if i was Real motivated maybe id start shifting to continue.#so all id need to do is find the E flat and id be good. it all follows the same pattern.#the harder challenge will be the solo or etude. 2-3 minutes in length. only *one day* to prepare.#i have NO IDEA what id even play. i'll look in my old sheet music to see if theres anything that might work#simple enough for me to relearn on such short notice. and interesting enough to be played solo#(since i was always in orchestras it's not always the best for solo playing. tho i was also first violin section a lot#which is Basically the same as playing solo lmaooo)#if i cant find anything i do have a few sheet music books i could look in. id hate to play smth too simple#but better simple and Right than trying to do something above my current skill level.#which IRKS ME bc once upon a time i was the 4th best violinist in my high school. out of nearly 2k students.#but thats what happens when u go years without consistent practice :p ur arm gets Stiff.#im. still nervous but also thinking about the music is making me EXCITED.#it's going to be a wild time prepping for this thing but itll be over in like 5 mins and i dont even have to worry about Passing#so long as i *do it* i should get into something. i just need to push myself. do it. get out there. *play your violin*#i already cried in a public bathroom for 10 mins today and im feeling emotional Again.#not quite crying emotional tho thankfully. just. i feel like i need to climb onto a rooftop and SCREAM!!!! but like in a good way.#so so so nervous but itll be so so so worth it. i could be in an orchestra again. finally. finally finally finally.#and i STILL NEED TO FINISH THIS ASSIGNMENT.....!!!! hfkahfks today has been. a DAY.#just. keeps going through my head. i could be in an orchestra again. i could be in an orchestra again. at least one more time.
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i just don’t understand. why say ur ready to talk if you aren’t?
can u believe this post is what got me to reach tag limit
#vaugepostimg on main about an irl don’t mind me#i just. am feeling sad bcus i have been trying to keep my distance and respect the space they said they needed. and then they reached out to#me for their book club and said we should chat and i got excited! i miss my friend of course i got excited#still let them take the lead. i want them to be comfortable. they said they’d lmk what day they were free#and then proceeded to ghost me for like. almost two weeks??#(it was 10 days but !!! still!!! almost 2 weeks from them suggesting i come to book club which would’ve inherently necessitated an irl talk#and then after all that yesterday said they actually weren’t ready which. hurted#tbf i knew something was up after like 2 days of them not replying so it’s not like i was fully caught off guard it just really hurt#and like i feel weird bcus our social circles are really overlapped and i spent a lot of time with them last winter and i had thought#that would happen again this winter. we would swim together a lot and i consistently went to their house dinners#bcus if i care about you i show up! and i’m understanding ! bcus i am patient and kind person and as a triple taurus i’m not tryna rush ever#especially when it comes to people’s emotions ??? especially if someone has told me i hurt them???? like ik im an autistic lesbian but#despite popular conceptions on that particular identity. im not fucking evil ????? if you ask for space i will give you space !!!!!#and like when it comes to emotions and conflict i’m blunt but i’m caring and it takes a lot for me to be disinfranchised by people#or relationships. so i’m not saying i don’t want to still be her friend#i’m just. noticing behaviors#they did tell me that they were very avoidant in conflict and i told them i’m very much not and like. now that i’m on the receiving end of i#idk what to do!! i’m not gonna chase her down like they’re grown!! and again!!! if you ask for space i’m going to respect that!!!#and like honestly. i’m happy she at least gave me the curtesy of saying they weren’t ready to talk even if it took her mad long to do it#so like. who tf knows when we’ll talk. if ever. probably when she wants the validation of our friendship if it even happens at all#bcus again. she reached out not to reconnect and clear the air but to check if i still wanted to come to her club she was starting#ik in earlier conversations she was worried no one would come but ig she found people. which like good for her tbh but to be honest i feel#discarded?? i’m feeling like i’m failing to not project too much so i gotta stop but idk man i’m just feeling weird about it all#and then i had the thought today of like. is this what i want in a friendship? someone who goes back and forth abt whether or not i’m worth#which again. kinda wasn’t expecting that bcus we spent so much time together last autumn/winter/spring like. many times per week!!!#so the idea of not being her friend all of a sudden?? feels fucjing weird to think about#but like? i don’t want to feel this way this is what i hate about west coast/white people conflict resolution!! there fucking isn’t any!!!#and i can’t deal with that! i can’t spend my life with people who aren’t going to engage with me as a person who cares about them#humans are fallible creatures and were only here on earth for so long so why are we wasting time here? what is the point of all this ???????#but then the guilt and shame say i deserve it all and at that point i just need to stop so. i’m gonna stop now lol
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I literally can't believe you do not get a one-on-one section or conversation with estinien until the VERY END OF THE GODDAMN EXPAC
#saint.txt#spoilers#major spoilers#estinienposting#YOU KNOW? THE NEWEST GUY HERE WE KNOW THE LEAST?#WHO'S CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT HAPPENED OFFSCREEN?#DEVELOPMENT THAT HAS COMPLETELY CHANGED HIM AS A PERSON SO WE CAN'T COAST OFF HIS HW CHARACTERIZATION?#WHO NEEDED THE MOST HELP BC OF HIS INHERITED WRITING PROBLEMS FROM HW?#(yes I know they wrote a short story abt him. my rule is that I am fairly harsh on important character details and lore that is not#communicated in the primary medium. ie. if I have to go somewhere else to learn core character lore it should be in-game.)#but no. he's just here to be vr.tra's hype man. and I like vr.tra but goddamn.#like no wonder he feels like a side character just tacked onto the scions bc he's consistently treated as one by both them and the narrativ#and nothing is ever really done with that bc it COULD be a genuine conversation on the insularity of the scions and their work#and his perspective as an outsider with a completely different background and history and experiences could be a genuinely interesting#addition to the group dynamic as a shakeup but no!!! he's just here to be funny bc man stupid and nothing else happens!!!#he could comment on how genuinely uncomfortable his joining was (where he was basically press-ganged into it) and how he's been treated#re: the failure to keep him in the loop and the rough way he slots into the group dynamic and the pure fact that he is an outsider#to a years-long established group of friends and unintentionally or otherwise treated as an intruder / obviously doesn't feel comfortable#hanging out with his colleagues bc he passes up every opportunity to do so and how his position here is still 'mercenary'#and not 'friend and ally' AND how he's one of the few ppl here who can genuinely connect w/ the wol re: the lightwarden thing#sorry I'm ranting again but this man's writing is all over the goddamn place and I really do not get the sense that his promotion#to main character status was like. planned out in advance. bc nothing is really done with it other than hey vr.tra here's your dude.
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what's a really unfortunate discovery in my life in the last two years is that my boss told me i was racing against my beeper counting seconds last year and confiscated it (secret skill unlocked: can count to fifteen seconds in your head with extreme accuracy) and i'm like he cannot be for real with this, how do you Race Time. and then i play guitar against a metronome and You'll Never Fucking Guess What My Fatal Flaw Is
#'roo are you subconciously racing the metronome' YES I AM AND I'M BAFFLED#HOW did this man watch a horse gallop through a pair of binoculars and know that i am locked in mortal combat with the passage of time#truly insane#anyway we're uh. gonna get better at yknow. letting beats pass.#i think as with horse riding i play music more accurately without the metronome#or possibly i just do whatever i like#i distinctly remember my violin teacher never being able to change the way the uhhhhhh what do you call ems#the one concerto i had i just decided how it sounded and that's how it was and were my notes all a consistent length? pfff no#it sounds good though#oh that's the other thing i never got to do like level testing or whatever for any instrument ever?#but i randomly found out last year that i was at least like intermediate like halfway through the levels or whatever for violin?#false advertising i keep telling people i learnt nothing in eight years#but also can i technically pull off a 3 page concerto? yes. do my hands shake so much my bow sometimes jumps on the strings? yes.#anyway this seemed like a funny story for the masses#get to know you time with roo
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i’m sorry did they actually just say “lmao ash can’t possibly be wanting to actually use oshawott in this league battle, i bet it’s his throwaway for this round” as a quick gag. damn the anime really did shit all over team oshawott while it was airing
#snivy: got a really good personality and is consistently shown to be one of the better battlers while also being a good character#and its evolutions are also shown to be extremely competent and terrifying in the anime#tepig: got a really good abandonment trauma story (if rehashed) that was consistently handled well and is considered to be#one of ash's best pokemon in this gen#oshawott: lmao this thing fucking sucks. imagine ash actually using it and it being good. cringe.#isnt it also hilarious when we show it being beat up all the time. isnt it funny that its like a romancer and it starts all the conflicts#and the pokemon consistently agree its the most annoying and worst team member and make it the butt of every joke#even when we set it up to have some sort of good payoff we rarely actually do that bc we gotta keep the Funny (not funny)#also we're gonna debut samurott late in the anime and it's going to one of the worst recieved characters#im a little annoyed can you tell.#also im just realizing that they maybe added palpitoad so ash would have a ''legitimate'' water type to use this gen#i dont exactly have proof for that but suddenly im getting that vibe. suddenly i like that palpitad even less#echoed voice#pokeani lb#even as a kid i remember the way they treated oshawott upsetting me. especially in decolore they basically just make it piplup 2.0#where the joke is ''ha ha we beat up the small blue thing all the time and its funny bc its small and cute and its edgy to do that''#au where oshawott like. actually had that arc in operation tempest that i mentioned earlier#i like all thte unova starters im glad the other two at least got decent rep in the anime but the way they treated oshawott#literally like inspired ppl to say i was stupid for picking oshawott bc ''its weak and dumb in the anime''#like. man justice for oshawott
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man i havent posted art at all this month havent i. i promise art post(s) tomorrow :)
#as for now... goodnight dear followers :)#chris noises#misc#i like keeping the tradition of posting art at Least once a month#i wanna make sure im not too . whats the word#missing in action? maybe#eh. i just like it. keeps me in check.#i wanna be consistent in at least one thing#man i need to sit my ass down and finally start animating. been too long overdue. im just a pussy about it#ok its way past midnight im falling asleep while typing#gnnn !!
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Crochet Update
I'm making the fluffiest afghan in existence.
This is what the pattern's image is lol. I'm working on the middle rn. It is so fucking fluffy.
Also I don't think I showed the finished scarf I was making 🤔
This lil guy. Yes. It was very good practice.
I've also been working on a double crochet scarf (?) with yarn thats so small it might as well be thread hfkshfkd. It has a rly nice texture & I'm enjoying the pattern that's showing on it. Nice and crisp. Very different from the undefined fluffiness of the WIP afghan lol, though they both use double stich crochet. The afghan is turning the double stitches into V stitches though, so there are holes in it. Such is the way of an afghan, I suppose 🤔
Everywhere I've seen has cautioned against using dark yarn as a beginner bc it's hard to see your stitches with it. And Yeah, it sure fuckin is, but I've been getting by through sheer stubbornness bc I Love the color black. So I am Making black things. As is my RIGHT!!!!
#speculation nation#crochet shit#i bought like a shit ton of yarn yesterday. including 8 skeins of this 'super bulky' yarn for the afghan#it uses a 10mm hook man it's wild#but the yarn is so nice. it doesnt SPLIT so i can just go fuckin wild with it.#though it's harder to keep the yarn tension consistent. everything being jumbo makes that. Hard.#meanwhile the tiny thread is very easy to keep the tension but it splits like CRAZY#so i have to be very careful with it. & often have to repeat stitches several times.#slow going...😔#but yeah me struggling through my first crochet design!!! they write these shits in fucking CODE!!!!!#thank god for crochet friends for helping me make sense of it hfkshfksbxm#i think im doing pretty well now at least hehe#continuing to very much enjoy my crochet adventures. man why didnt anyone tell me this shit was so fun#having the time of my life !!!!!!!
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I was looking back on the time lapses for the og batch of eternal gales references and it's so crazy to me how many of them I just went in fully raw without referencing any previous drawings of them at all. Like it makes sense since most of them were originally just random designs I doodled during school and I never needed reference to draw them before and like I still don't technically need references for anything but colors for them but still it feels so strange to me. Like what do you mean I didn't always slap like 5 reference images on every canvas before doodling a character who's design I have memorized who is this
#rat rambles#oc posting#eternal gales#tbf their designs Were inconsistent at the time but thats mostly because they were all originally random doodle designs that were still#being developed as designs and as characters#it would take years for them to gain some real consistency in how I draw them#anyways this post is me stalling going to bed because my knee hurts and I was kinda hoping it'd stop hurting before I went to bed rip#its not even my usual bad knee this time cmon dude dont break on me too other knee#man why did I have to treat my knees so badly as a kid this shit is just gonna keep getting worse I know it 😔#I dont actually mind that much but it does become an issue when Im trying to sleep#and I've been sleeping poorly lately so yknow. not great.#idk maybe I should look into doing smth more abt that but its never rly hurt that much just enough to keep me from sleeping well#which now that Im saying it like that definitely qualifies as enough to look into but eh. Im lazy.#honestly its a mieacle that its mostly just my knees that are fucked my back should by all means be worse#I used to have horrible back and shoulder pain as a teenager but I escaped backpack hell#anyways enough stalling I need to at least try to sleep. gn gamers
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Just Confess Already!
A collection of drabbles about how your man's closest companions help him overcome his fears and finally confess his feelings for you.
Characters: Wriothesley, Neuvillette, Kaveh, Tighnari, Lyney, Itto, Childe, and Baizhu.
Now proofread.
Wriothesley:
🐺 Ever since Sigewinne saw you and Wriothesley in each other’s company, she instantly figured out you two liked each other. She knew you had feelings for the Duke because she has exceptional people-reading skills and could see right through you. You tried to hide your feelings from Wriothesley, but Sigewinne could tell how your heart raced when in his presence, the subtle heat in your cheeks and the secret glances you threw his way when you thought he wasn’t looking. Honestly, she might have thought you had a fever at first if these symptoms didn’t occur only when the Lord of the Fortress of Meropide was around. Since you hid your feelings, Sigewinne assumed that you weren’t certain if Wriothesley liked you back, to which the Fortress’s nurse could only shake her head because how can you not see he likes you?
🐺 Wriothesley knows your favorite tea blend like the back of his hand, and yet he constantly invites you to try out a new blend he made that he thinks you’ll like. Everyone knows how much the Duke loves tea, but surely you can tell that he uses the tea as an excuse to get you to stay longer and spend more time with him? Moreover, Wriothesley shows off more in front of you, trying to impress you with his extensive tea collection intellect, hospitality, physique—anything, really. Sigewinne could tell how his body language shifted to appear more confident, how his voice pitched a little lower to an almost sultry timbre, and yet despite his laidback smile, the micro-expressions on his face told her clear as day that he was nervous about interacting with you. Much like you, he hid his feelings because he wasn’t sure if you liked him. Even when Sigewinne tells him that you do like him back, the Duke doesn’t fully believe her, the idiot.
🐺 Once she gets fed up with watching the two of you pussyfoot around each other, Sigewinne comes up with a covert plan on how to get at least one of you to confess their feelings. She comes up with excuses to send you over to see Wriothesley (and as expected, he keeps you around longer than you intend), finds out what foods and flowers you like to pass that information to Wriothesley in a casual conversation (and suddenly you find your favorite snacks or flowers delivered to you from an unknown sender), and consistently eavesdrops on your pair to make sure things were going smoothly. As expected, her plan works like a charm and it doesn’t take long for Wriothesley to confess to you, much to the Melusine’s delight. Later on when she and the Duke have lunch together, she’ll congratulate him on his new relationship before smugly saying “I told you Y/N liked you too.”
Neuvillette:
⚖️ Neuvillette’s emotions were generally a mystery to most people, even to the Melusines working under him. However, all it took was for one Melusine to see the soft and tender look in the Chief Justice’s eyes when he gazed at you during one of your outings, and before long, every Melusine in Fontaine heard the news that their beloved Monsieur Neuvillette found a human to love. At first they were just rumors, but a few Melusines working at Palais Mermonia confirmed that the reclusive Iudex did indeed make time in his busy schedule to see you regularly. The evidence all pointed to the idea that Neuvillette and you must be lovers, because why else would the Chief Justice give you such special treatment compared to most other humans? Their assumption was almost correct. Neuvillette did indeed love you, but the two of you weren’t a couple.
⚖️ With this revelation, the Melusines begin approaching you more frequently than before, many of them greeting and congratulating you. When you ask them what they were congratulating you for, they only reply with “Why, on your engagement of course!” before skipping away to carry out their duties without giving you a chance to ask who you were supposedly engaged to. Your puzzlement persists until one day, when you were having your regular meeting with Neuvillette to relax over a cup of water tea, a Melusine approached your pair to congratulate you on your engagement to each other. You almost spat out your drink as the puzzle pieces fell into place, and could only watch with wide eyes as Neuvillette gently corrected the Melusine, telling her that you weren’t engaged before patting her head in comfort. Though he appeared his usual composed self, internally he was as flustered as you. Understanding her mistake, the Melusine sheepishly apologized before leaving to tell her sisters the truth behind your relationship.
⚖️ The news sadden the Melusines, but they figure that if the two of you aren’t together, then they can help you! In their eyes, both you and Neuvillette really liked each other based on how each of you behaved around the other. A few of them take it upon themselves to give you a little push by telling you all about how kind, gracious, just, and reliable Neuvillette is. He’s so amazing, surely you want to spend your life with a man like him by your side, right? As for Neuvillette, though Melusines aren’t experts on human courtship, they observed enough human couples to give the Iudex suggestions on how to court you. One Melusine recommends he give you flowers, and Neuvillette doesn’t have the heart to disappoint her, so one day he gifts you a bouquet of flowers while awkwardly avoiding your gaze. The process of getting you two together is a slow one, but once you finally become a couple after a long period of pining, the Melusines celebrate and congratulate you (this time for good reason), overjoyed to have helped bring your hearts together.
Kaveh:
🍷 Mehrak may be an artificial life form, but it can tell that its owner likes you. Like, really likes you to the point of doodling your image in his sketchbook, saving up as much money as he can to take you out to eat, and taking a ridiculous amount of time getting ready when he has plans to meet up with you. He has to look perfect for you, or so Kaveh told Mehrak. Having seen how infatuated it’s owner is with you, and also seen the lovestruck gaze you give the architect every time you two meet, Mehrak concludes that Kaveh and you must be a loving couple with how you pine for one another. But as time passes, Mehrak realizes that you two aren’t holding hands, hugging, or kissing like the couples it has seen do, and the sentient suitcase becomes confused. In its mind, you two are already together, so why aren’t you being as affectionate as it knows you want to be? Perhaps you two need a little push to get closer, it thinks, before it comes up with things it could do to help.
🍷 From there, whenever Kaveh designs new buildings, Mehrak will do its best to incorporate design elements it knows you like into Kaveh’s sketches. Kaveh knows what you like too, and easily recognizes your favorite flowers in the garden blueprints, fountains in the courtyard (because you said you like them), as well as your favorite vases and rugs in the interior blueprints. They’re not what Kaveh was planning, and he scolds Mehrak for deviating from his vision, but the little suitcase doesn’t stop. When it sees items or foods you like on display in the street stalls, it will fly over to them and give a cheerful chirp as if signaling Kaveh to buy them to give you as a gift. But out of everything Mehrak does, what flusters Kaveh the most is when it drags him to you. When Mehrak spots you in the distance, it grows excited and flies over to greet you thereby yanking the poor architect with it who can do nothing but hold onto his creation for dear life.
🍷 Mehrak’s efforts eventually pay off because there comes a point where Kaveh can’t stop thinking about you. He already thought about you a lot as evident by his sketches of you in his private notebook, but Mehrak’s actions served to constantly remind the architect of you and made him fall even more in love with you. It’s at this point that Kaveh gathers up the courage to finally confess to you. Mehrak couldn’t be happier to see the two of you together once you accept Kaveh’s feelings, even doing a little happy dance in celebration of completing its mission.
Tighnari:
🍄 Collei won’t know that her teacher likes you until one fateful evening when she heads toward Tighnari’s living quarters to ask him a question, and accidentally overhears him and Cyno talking about Tighnari’s romantic feelings for you. It comes as a surprise to her because she genuinely had no idea her teacher loved you. He didn’t seem to treat you any differently from anyone else, but that’s only because Tighnari does a really good job at keeping his feelings on the down low. Now that she knew, suddenly everything made sense. All the times Tighnari freed up his busy schedule to provide you help when you asked for it, the way he attentively listened to you and was the first to help if you got injured, his many gifts of various potions and plants that were good for your health, and even the fact that he frequently let you touch his ears and tail were all subtle signs of his affection for you!
🍄 With this new knowledge in hand, Collei schedules a day to hang out with you. Her main goal was to get your help with some of her reading materials since you often helped her when Tighnari was too busy, but her second reason was to ask you about your feelings for her teacher. When she works up the courage to breach the question, she gets the best answer she could have hoped for. You told her you really liked Tighnari, and Collei’s eyes practically sparkle in excitement. She respects your request to not tell Tighnari about your feelings, but unfortunately ends up breaking that promise, but not of her own free will.
🍄 When she tried subtly pushing Tighnari into courting you, she wasn’t as slick about it as she thought because her teacher is too perceptive, and Tighnari quickly found out what she was planning. The forest ranger confronted her about her strange behaviour, and Collei felt pressured to tell him everything. She tells him all about the conversation she overheard between him and Cyno, how his feelings for you were mutual, and about her good intentions to help you and him get together. Tighnari isn’t mad at her. If anything, he might thank her later for giving him this information, but not before giving her a talking-to about messing in other people’s business. Though her plans didn’t go as expected and she had to reveal your secret, in the end, things still worked out the way she hoped. After that fateful conversation, Tighnari sought you out to finally make his feelings for you clear, and Collei felt a sense of accomplishment at having done something good for the people she cared about.
Lyney:
🎩 Lynette knows pretty quickly when her brother develops a crush on you. The way he ekes out time out of his schedule to visit you regularly and his constant flirting are some of his tells. And if that wasn’t obvious enough, then the silly grin he wears while talking about you, and the magic tricks he designs and practices for hours on end just to impress you with are all Lynette needs to know that Lyney is down bad for you. Knowing about her brother’s romantic feelings, Lynette will tag along with him during some of his meetings with you to observe and get to know you better. She is pleasantly surprised to learn that you like Lyney back, and finds some amusement in watching the two of you grow flustered with each other’s flirting. Even so, she honestly would much rather not witness her brother flirting and trying to court the object of his affection since she finds it icky and feels like a third wheel.
🎩 Despite her reservations, Lynette does her best to support Lyney’s love life since she wants him to be happy. She watches Lyney’s feelings grow from a crush to full-fledged love over the passage of time, and the growing nervousness and anxiety that comes with it. Lyney spends a lot of time coming up with magic tricks to impress you with and practices them until they’re polished and come like second nature to him. Even so, he still gets really nervous about performing them for you, even doubting whether you’ll like them. That’s when Lynette comes in with words of encouragement and support to try and ease his nerves. If that doesn’t work, she tells Lyney point blank that you like him back. Had these words come from anyone else, Lyney wouldn’t have believed them. However, because it’s Lynette whom he knows is really good at reading people, Lyney believes her, albeit with a great deal of questions about how she can be so sure about her deduction.
🎩 Even now knowing you like him back, Lyney is still too nervous to confess, so Lynette changes tactics. She tries to give you hints about Lyney’s feelings for you, calling out his behaviour right in front of you by saying things like “You’ve never given me any Rainbow Roses, and yet give Y/N a whole bunch of them!” or “Lyney pulled a lot of all-nighters to try and perfect this trick just to show you”, much to Lyney’s dismay. Lynette does this in part because she likes to tease her brother, but also because she hopes you’ll get the hint and maybe confess your feelings first if Lyney won’t. Regardless of who confesses first, the end result will still be Lyney and you becoming lovers because Lynette can be a surprisingly good wingwoman. It brings a small smile to her lips to see the two of you happy in each other’s company now that your feelings are out in the open. All she wants is for her brother to be happy, and she’s glad that he can find that happiness with you.
Itto:
🐂 The Arataki gang had long been aware of Itto’s feelings for you, what with how frequently Itto talks about you and how he turns into an awkward, blushing mess when you’re around. Genta, Mamoru, and Akira decide to team up to concoct a series of plans on how to finally get you and Itto together, and agree that first Itto should try to court you to win your heart. They recommend Itto a bunch of romantic and affordable gifts he could give you, street stalls to take you to for delicious (and cheap) food, as well as the type of compliments Itto should say to flatter you (though all Itto can manage is “You have, uh… really nice hair!”). It's a whole operation the gang affectionately calls Operation: Helping Boss win Y/N’s heart. Shinobu has to keep a watchful eye on the proceedings of said operation lest her friends get carried away and start planning an expensive wedding before you and Itto even become a couple.
🐂 When Itto feels like it’s time for him to confess his feelings to you, he invites you to meet under a large sakura tree. The Arataki gang come along with him and sit in the nearby bushes to spy on the two of you. You’ll hear hushed “You can do it, boss! We believe in you!” from the bushes as the gang members encourage Itto and give him thumbs up. As much as Itto appreciates his boys’ support, now is not the time, he thinks as he looks at you with flushed cheeks, flustered by his group’s antics. Shinobu facepalms off to the side before dragging Mamoru, Akira, and Genta away to give you and Itto some privacy, but silently wishes him luck with his confession before leaving.
🐂 The gang eagerly awaits the results of the confession, feeling just as nervous as Itto. However, they don’t have to wait long because Itto’s loud whoop of joy soon reverberates through the area, indicating that you accepted his feelings. A little while later, the boys will throw a party to celebrate the occasion, splurging on some tasty food and drink, and congratulate Itto on finding love. Though they want to find love themselves, they’re still incredibly proud of their boss because they know the effort it took him to get to this point. Even Shinobu offers Itto a couple of words of congratulations. From then on, the gang will work hard to welcome you into their group and give you as much respect as they give Itto due to your status as his lover.
Childe:
🐋 From the way Childe talked about you in his letters, his younger siblings were convinced that you and him were already dating. Wanting to meet the person special to their big brother’s heart, they begged and pleaded with him to invite you over to introduce you to them. Once Ajax relents and brings you to meet his family, his younger siblings swarm you with questions about yourself and their brother, before Teucer enthusiastically asks when you’ll be marrying Ajax. You exchange awkward glances with Childe, and before the Harbinger can even attempt to resolve the misunderstanding, with a heavy heart you explain to Teucer that you and Ajax are not even dating (hearing that kind of hurts Childe, he won’t lie).
🐋 The expressions of shock and disappointment that Teucer and the rest of the younger siblings give you is honestly heart-wrenching and makes you feel a little guilty. “So, you don’t like big brother?” Teucer asks sadly. You correct him and admit that you do like Ajax, but you don’t specify exactly how. The children will pester you to tell them what kind of “like” you mean, but thankfully Ajax saves you from their badgering. Only Tonia figures out that your “like” is more of a “love”, but she is smart enough to not blab about your feelings to Teucer and Anton.
🐋 Despite their earlier disappointment, the children take a liking to you and constantly ask Ajax to bring you along on their family adventures or simply invite you to play games with them. During your hangouts, the children tell you about how Childe talks about you in his letters, basically ratting out his feelings for you much to Childe’s mortification. They also try to convince you to date their brother because, in their eyes, you two make a cute couple and Ajax looks really happy when next to you. The children won’t know if their words managed to convince you until the night when you and Childe were preparing dinner in their kitchen. Tonia and her brothers had a question they wanted to ask you, however as they approached the kitchen, Tonia overheard you and her older brother discussing your feelings for one another. With a smile, she quietly lead Anton and Teucer away to give you two some time to sort out your feelings, though she’s confident that by tomorrow you will be an honorary addition to their family, and perhaps a real member sometime in the near future.
Baizhu:
🐍 Changsheng can easily tell that Baizhu likes you. The doctor is always polite and cordial, but with you he acts especially sweet and takes time to have a casual chat with you when you come to pick up your medicine. Fed up with constantly seeing him giving you pining glances, Changsheng asks why he won’t just confess to you and get this pining over with, to which Baizhu retorts that he’s too busy to manage a proper relationship. He worries he would be too busy to give those he loves enough time and attention, but he also fears that you don’t feel the same way. His response and stubbornness frustrate Changsheng.
🐍 Her frustration continues to grow when she observes you and notices that telltale nervous and bashful behaviour of yours whenever you talk to Baizhu. You don’t behave that way when talking to Qiqi or Gui, and you also inquire about Baizhu’s health often, clearly worried about him. Clearly, you like him more than just as your doctor. Changsheng feels like screaming when the three of you are in the same room together, forced to endure watching both Baizhu and you pining for one another, yet not making a move.
🐍 One day, after seeing yet another exchange between you and Baizhu that’s full of hidden longing yet leads nowhere, her patience finally snaps. “Ugh, I can’t take it anymore! Why won’t the two of you confess that you both love each other? It’s so obvious!” she exclaims and slithers out of the room with a huff to cool off her temper. She caught brief snippets of you asking Baizhu if what she said is true, before going out of earshot. She fumes for a little while, grumbling about how foolish you’re both behaving before making her way back. To her delight, she glimpses your rosy cheeks and happy grin, as well as Baizhu’s relieved expression from behind the doorway, and realizes you two finally confessed. At long last, after all this time she thinks and sighs in relief. Changsheng decides to extend her break and come back later, wanting to give you and Baizhu a chance to properly sort out your newfound relationship. She hopes Baizhu is prepared for the long talking-to shell give him about dragging out this situation for so long, but until then, she’ll guard the entrance to the room to make sure no one interrupts you.
#genshin impact x reader#genshin x reader#wriothesley x reader#neuvillette x reader#kaveh x reader#tighnari x reader#lyney x reader#arataki itto x reader#itto arataki x reader#itto x reader#childe x reader#tartaglia x reader#baizhu x reader
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It irks me the way that the fight scene in Per Haskell's bar makes little sense in the show because they decided to for some reason forgo Per Haskell and Kaz's real relationship even though his assent through the ranks of the Dregs and the blood, sweat, and tears he put in into making the Dregs into an actually reputable gang is a big part of his journey into who he is today. He put everything into that gang because he had always intended to get to the point where he could come and collect on his hard work when the time came for him to stake his claim as the real leader of the Dregs that they are today because Per Haskell was not that by a long shot. Why they decided to omit that I'll never understand.
#it was so well built on the books but the series does not deliver on setting it up at alL#if we get the ice heist/crooked kingdom; im rearranging the scenes on my head to make it fit to that rather than the show lmao#it was probably having to do with not wanting to have to go through the effort of creating scenes to showcase that but honestly would've#been worth it ; kaz needed that desire to become the real leader of dregs as part of his motivation to take risky af jobs man#reason number 22191939 why they should've kept the two book series separate aH#honestly i just don't understand live action adaptions at all i think 'cause for me ; i want them to be accurate to the source material#but ever adaption we get always has to subvert or change things or screw with the timeline of the original so they can say they're making i#~their own~ i don't want your version of the thing; i want the actual version ; i know you can't do it verbatim obviously; but#they can at least keep it consistent with the source material smhhhh#like it's not like this is some retelling numner 28292 of some snow white that you need to give a spin on because there are already so many#live action versions ; most of the book/tv show adaptations are the first of their series so you just need to bring it to life on screen
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pairing: logan howlett x afab!reader. 18+, minors dni. angst; smut (p in v unprotected sex; handjob - logan receiving; oral - reader & logan receiving). canonically bisexual reader. mentions of pregnancy attempts. dp+w movie spoilers.
synopsis: in the Void, after leaving the other dead in your own timelines, you and Logan are reunited.
words: 8.5k.
notes: this was inspired by not your man by @studioghibelli and the worst logan by @coweye! please go and read both these fics and show their authors some love, they are both incredibly talented writers who deserve it! dividers by @saradika-graphics 💕
The past couple of days have been a lot.
To be honest, anything that isn’t sitting at a bar drinking the place dry is a lot to Logan nowadays. He’s used to low lights, rumbling conversation around him, the fuzzier end of consciousness. Even now he aches for a drink, knowing he’ll have to wake up sober next to the asshole in red he spent the night putting down in that fucking minivan.
He hopes, at least, he has been met with all the surprises that this place can afford him.
Ah. But that’d be too fucking easy, right?
That Cajun bastard’s liquor sits comfortably in the cradle of his palm and he chases away lucidity one swig at a time. Tries to block out the half-baked plan Wade is concocting with the other poor bastards who have been stuck here, even if it’s all probably pointless. He only chimes in to laugh at their hope.
Then Elektra turns, withering pity in her eyes, and seems to properly assess him for the first time.
“They’re gonna be so disappointed when they see you.”
“Who?” he snorts, past the point of caring that he’d disappoint anyone. It’s then that Elektra hits him like a fucking freight train with just one word spilling from her lips: your name.
Logan feels a flood of memories come back to him. Ones he’s spent too long trying to drink away. The early morning when you’d hide under the blankets together, your hand cradling his face and letting the whole world consist of just the two of you. The stolen kisses in quiet corridors so the students at the mansion wouldn’t catch you and start silly little rumours.
Him holding your lifeless body in his arms surrounded by the rubble of what used to be your bedroom, your powers unable to save you.
He doesn’t have anything to say, merely spitting vitriol to anyone who tries to speak to him, even that damn kid who still prefers the other dead Logan to him. Why wouldn’t she? He’s a fucking mess, worth less than nothing, and that Logan was a hero.
He retreats in the evening to lick his wounds or, hopefully, drown them. People keep trying to fucking talk to him and he does not want it. Yet they’re fucking relentless, like the Void is perfect at creating gut punch after gut punch for him. Laura walks away into the darkness after successfully making him feel like shit - not that it’s difficult these days - and when he hears more footsteps he assumes it’s Wade coming to harass him about tomorrow.
“Oh, will you fuck off - ?” he snarls, but the sight of you there, half lit by a dying fire with orange dancing on your skin, oh, it just kills any venom he can muster dead in his throat.
Logan is looking at a ghost and he has never been less prepared for anything in his long, long life.
Your mouth has fallen open into a soft “o” as you look at him, brows knitted together as you take in every imperfect aspect of his being.
“Lo?” you whisper. Your voice hasn’t changed.
“Logan,” he replies, gruff, unsure if he’s confirming or correcting. But fuck does it sound good to hear his name out of your mouth again, even if it’s just a syllable.
You tuck a lock of hair behind your ear and take a seat on one of the logs which has been pulled up as a makeshift bench. He tries not to watch the way the fire lights up your eyes. There’s an agonisingly long pause before you finally attempt conversation.
“Long time no see, huh?” you ask with a weak grin. Fuck. It’s like a dagger. Your humour was always something which endeared you to him. Unlike Wade you never took it too far, cultivating your sincerity with your silliness in order to grow yourself into peoples’ hearts.
His heart especially, and now it aches.
He grunts, because he can’t bring himself to actually say anything. Can barely look at you. You keep talking, either not noticing or barrelling on regardless.
“You know, when the gang said that you were here… I didn’t believe it. Thought there was no way a fucking Wolverine would fall into this place.”
“Let me guess,” he sneers, taking another long drag of bourbon, “I’m not what you expected.”
You laugh, an easy little thing, and part of him hates you for it. For reminding him of how it sounds.
“I mean, you’re not. But not because of what you’re thinking.”
“How do you know what I’m thinking?” It comes out as a snap, lip curling back over his teeth in disgust. You do not look bothered in the least, just crossing one leg over the other and leaning back.
“Because I know you, Logan. Knew my Logan too. Bet you’re spiralling, making yourself out to be some kinda disappointment. Well you’re not. You could never be.”
He desperately wants to argue but he simply doesn’t have the gumption. Besides, it’s nice to hear someone say something kind about him after all these years.
“So,” you say after another one of those painful pauses, “considering every time you look my way you wince, you have a me in your timeline?”
He laughs without any humour in it, stares into the flames for so long they start to hurt his eyes.
“Yeah. I did.”
“Ahh. ‘Did’. I died, then?”
You say it so flippantly, he can’t fucking stand it.
“Mmm.”
“Makes sense. Don’t think I’d leave you in any timeline, so the only way I could see us ending would be if I wasn’t there any more.” You sigh, stretching your legs out to warm them. “Can I ask how it happened? Call it morbid curiosity.”
He absolutely does not want to talk about this. But, also… it’s you. Maybe not the you that was his, exactly, but it is you. Perhaps you deserve to know. He tries to stay dispassionate, as if he is a doctor quietly recounting the facts of death to a family member.
“Mansion was attacked. Everyone died, including you. I wasn’t there. We’d had a fight, I went out drinking. When I got back you were gone.” He flexes his fist around the neck of the bottle, trying to avoid shattering it, but desperately needing to hold onto something.
“Oh.” The fire crackles loudly. “What did we fight about?”
This will kill him. He will die in this Void.
“You wanted to do another round of IVF. I didn’t want to be disappointed again.”
The words settle like a cloud of choking ash over the two of you. He takes a long drink. What a fucking failure he is, couldn’t even knock you up properly.
“Fuck, Logan. I’m so sorry.”
“Yeah.”
“Does it help if I tell you I probably wasn’t that mad? I’ve never been really angry with you, you know. My Logan… we used to bicker a lot, we both had short fuses, but it never meant anything in the long run.”
He doesn’t know if it does help or not. Is it better to know that you died hating him, making it easier? Or that you were snuffed out while loving him the whole time?
“Your turn,” he says, because he can’t bear to continue this particular line of conversation, but for some reason he wants to keep talking to you. Your voice is a comfort he thought he’d long since lost.
“You wanna see a picture?” you ask, a grin pulling at the sides of your mouth. No, he doesn’t, but when you reach into your jacket to grab the photograph, he finds himself holding his hand out to take it. You slowly float it over, telekinesis absolutely unnecessary - but you always did use it to make the little things easier.
It’s old. Frayed and disintegrating at the edges, a thing which has been held and looked at over and over again. Faded slightly despite the fact that you clearly try to take good care of it.
“Oh,” he says, eyes widening. You chuckle.
“I know.”
Because, despite the lack of facial hair and addition of a decent rack, the woman with her arm around you in the photo is him.
The Logan in the picture is about as butch as they come, decked out in a Wolverine’s trademark flannel and leather. One of her arms is wrapped around you to keep you close against her, the other playfully flipping the camera off with a middle claw, and she’s laughing with a joy he hasn’t seen on his own face for years. You’re pressing a kiss into her cheek and hanging onto one of her thick biceps. The two of you exude happiness.
“She was the best thing that ever happened to me. She could be a mean cunt sometimes, smoked like a chimney, drank like a fish, but fuck we were the centres of each other’s world.” You let out a long sigh and hold your hand out - Logan goes to give you the photo but instead you gesture for the bourbon. He passes it and you and you drink deeply, gratefully. “I’d been in a string of bad relationships. Guys who took me for granted, women who were toxic but I didn’t realise until I was in too deep. Then she came along and well… she was a fucking angel in plaid.”
Logan’s thumb absentmindedly strokes the photo. He’s pretty sure there’s a near-identical one back in his timeline.
“Our mansion was attacked too. She died getting the kids out.”
Fuck. Fuck. No, he can’t do this. He can’t face the way he should have died. He really is the fucking worst Wolverine. He snatches the bottle back from you, you give no resistance, and he polishes it off. The photo flutters to the ground.
“I think it’s time you fucked off,” he growls out. You roll your eyes, fucking roll your eyes at him, something his version of you did on pretty much a daily basis, and the knife in his heart twists further.
“Well, Logan, I’m not gonna do that. Because this conversation is the most whole I’ve felt in a long time, and I’m pretty sure you feel the same way.”
He doesn’t. He does. He wants you to disappear forever. He wants to hold you close and kiss you, beg you never to leave again. He hates you. He loves you so, so much.
He’s such a ruined man that it is laughable.
“So what, I come along and just replace your little girlfriend? First Wolverine that you manage to get your hands on; is that what you’re hoping for?”
You bark out a laugh. It echoes around the trees. There are tears in your eyes when he turns to look.
“Girlfriend? Logan, you were my fucking wife!”
It’s such a ridiculous thing to say that the laughter engulfs you, peals of giggles that double you over. You hold your head in your hands and it soon turns to bitter sobs. He wants to reach out and hold you, apologise for ever making you sad. He tries to get any lingering drops from the bourbon instead.
“We got married at the mansion. Charles officiated. The kids made us cards. We didn’t get a honeymoon because we didn’t have the fucking time. We had five years. Five really happy years and you know what? We wanted a baby too. We were getting a donor lined up! And then when the attack happened you were the one getting all the kids out I begged you to come with us but you were too fucking good, you had to stay behind and make sure nobody followed us. And it cost you your fucking life. They ripped you apart Logan. I know because all I found of you was your head and your wedding ring. I didn’t even get time to mourn because I had a dozen children to fucking take care of! And I did because I knew that’s what you’d want me to do. It’s what you died for. So I lived in the fucking woods with all of them for years, and they were my family, and I made sure they were as safe and happy as I could make them. And you know what happened then? When they were all grown? A fucking TVA agent appears out of nowhere and tells me, ‘oops! Sorry! Your Logan wasn’t supposed to die, it was meant to be you!’ So they fucking throw me in this hellhole to rot away into nothing and I’m sorry, Logan, I’m sorry that when I heard you were here I got my fucking hopes up that you might be happy to see me, because if there was one person who understood all of the shit I’m going through then it might be you.” You throw your head back up to stare him dead in the eyes. “And it’s pathetic because you know what? Even after all this? I’m still not angry with you. I’m still happy you’re here. Because seeing you makes me feel better, despite everything.”
It’s a long-ass rant, and your words hang in the air after you’re done. He doesn’t know what to say. What can he say? He opens his mouth to apologise but the words just won’t come out. Because, yeah, if he really dissects himself and looks at the parts laid bare, he’s glad you’re here too.
He reaches down to rescue the photo before an ember lands on it, gingerly extending into you. When you take it back his fingers brush yours. He wishes he wasn’t wearing gloves.
“Who was the donor?” he asks eventually. That does a lot to alleviate the mood, and you smile through tear-streaked cheeks.
“You might not like the answer.”
“Oh, for fuck’s sake, don’t tell me it was Scott.”
“The two of you got on okay! Butted heads a lot but he was always a good friend to us. Plus it was cheaper than going through an agency.”
He growls to himself and it makes you laugh, but properly this time. Things have started to soften and it’s… nice. To be like this with you again. You pause for a moment, stuck on whether to ask a question; hesitate over whether it’s a good idea, then barrel on regardless.
“Can I ask a weird question?”
“You’re dangerously close to sounding like Wade,” he replies. You groan at that idea.
“Ugh. Fucking Deadpools, man. We get one come along every now and then and trash the place before fucking off again. Apparently there’s like, a tribe of them out there somewhere.” You give a full-body shudder. “Imagine. No, it’s nothing like that, I guess. Can you… can you take off your glove? Left one.”
He has a horrible feeling about this but when you ask so nicely, that air of vulnerability around you, well it just seeps into his fractures and breaks him open. It takes a moment but he does, flexing his bare hand in the cool air.
You reach around your neck and pull at a thin chain he’d barely noticed. The ring at the end slides up from where it’s been resting on your sternum under your shirt, glinting as you remove it.
“Give me your hand.”
This is a bad idea.
He does anyway.
You slip the ring on his fourth finger, softly twisting it to fit over his knuckle as you go. It is the perfect size.
“Will you look at that,” you mumble, not releasing your grip on him. “She… you always told me your hands were kinda big because of the claws. Like I cared. One of my favourite parts about you.”
Your fingers trace along his, finding the spaces between them and gently slotting your hands together. Logan isn’t sure if he’s the one who closes the grasp or if it’s you, but a beat passes and suddenly you’re holding hands.
He’s not done this with you for so fucking long. An age of aching which is relieved at the feeling of your palm up against his.
“So now what?” he eventually has to ask. You smile.
“Well, I mean, your Deadpool is probably gonna get us all killed tomorrow…”
“Ugh. Don’t call him ‘my Deadpool’.”
“… so I’d quite like to just spend tonight holding your hand, if that’s okay. Seems like a pretty nice final night to me.”
When you hit him with those soft eyes, what other fucking choice does he have?
You don’t speak much for the rest of the night. Eventually the fire dies out. Laura comes to seek you out the next morning, and is surprised to find you lying side by side with this other Logan, the most deeply asleep she’s ever seen you, fingers laced together so tightly with his it looks like it might hurt.
He comes to the fight, of course; dredging up what little courage he has left in him in order to prove he’s not totally pathetic. You catch his eye and smile so wide that he feels likes he’s done at least one good fucking thing in his life. He hears the sound of you ripping into people with an enthusiasm he hasn’t witnessed for years. The last glimpse of you he gets before he jumps through the portal is you using your telekinesis to tear a man’s head off and he does not want to examine himself too closely when it sends a jolt of arousal down his spine.
They leave you all there to face the end, but everyone knew that’s what you were all getting into. There has been a net gain and loss of nil. He never had you again. Not really. Not for anything longer than a night, and maybe that will be enough.
Yes. That’s enough. It has to be.
When he tells Wade he’ll go into that room, when he volunteers to die, he does it with the knowledge he’ll be doing something good, finally. Something you’d be proud of him for doing. And with you waiting for him on the other end of oblivion it really doesn’t seem too bad a fate.
But then Wade does what he always does and fucks up his perfectly meticulous plan, and they both make it through, so he has to keep going.
When Wade asks the TVA agent to help the group of you they left behind, Logan is sure to add on that people should get the opportunity to go back to their timelines - surely it’s what you’d want (this oddly selfless request has Wade raising an eyebrow which he ignores). After all, why wouldn’t you want to go back? It’s where you belong. Where you’ll be happiest. Putting things nice and neatly back into their place after this whole fucked-up venture.
He doesn’t have you, but he’s still alive and wants to be, and that’s something. A lot more than he’s had for a long time now to be honest.
His life becomes this strange little thing that’s wrapped up with Wade’s. He sleeps on his pull-out sofa until he has somewhere proper to put down his roots. Tries to lay off the booze as much as he can even if each day is a fucking struggle. Makes steps towards finding a proper place for himself; even gets a job on the door at the bar across the street. It’s okay. One step at a time. He can put himself back together like that.
Imagine his surprise, then, when a week later there’s a knock at the door.
He assumes it’s Al who’s forgotten her keys, or is too drunk to fish them out of her purse after bingo, so opens it without really thinking.
The second time you’ve nearly stopped his heart in seven days.
“Hey,” you say.
“Oh,” is what he can manage. You tuck a lock of hair behind your ear. Your go-to.
“Yeah. Sorry. I uh, followed you back, I suppose. The TVA were gonna send me home but I asked where you were and when the answer was ‘here’, well… didn’t make sense for me to be any place else.”
He blinks at you. After a beat of silence he can tell you hate, no doubt wondering if your choice was the wrong one, he lifts his hand to cup your face. You stiffen for a second and then nestle into his palm.
“You’re real,” he states. You press your hand to his.
“I am.”
He pulls you into his chest and you are more than willing to come. He feels the way you bury yourself into him, nose first, remembering what he smells like. Your arms wrap around him so tight it’s like you’re scared he will disappear when it should be the other way round: if anyone is dreaming it’s him. You bothered coming here for him. You uprooted your whole life for it.
He could hold you forever but the neighbours are nosy and the apartment is a mess. He presses his mouth close to your ear.
“Wanna get a coffee?”
You pull back to meet his gaze.
“I’d love that.” Your eyes drop and you pull a face. “Oh, uhh, you might wanna get changed first, though.”
He looks down and realises what shirt he’s wearing before letting out a groan, which gets you chuckling.
“Wilson’s letting me borrow his shirts until my first paycheck comes in. Just to slum around the apartment.”
“Oh, so you’re not ‘employee of the month at the dick sucking factory’?” You ask, reading the slogan on his tee.
“No. Looks like Wilson won out over me.”
The fact he’s made a joke hangs in the air for a moment and you burst into laughter, real actual laughter, and it’s the most beautiful fucking thing he’s ever heard.
He grabs the only plain shirt Wade has left out, slices off the sleeves just because, and grabs twenty dollars from his roommate’s wallet. Soon enough you’re sitting in the little café near his building. The sky is grey and overcast, just threatening to rain but not quite bothering, and the two of you are tucked away in a corner table while Taylor Swift plays over the sound system.
Logan does not like that he knows it’s Taylor Swift. This is what living with Wade has done to him.
You watch him with affectionate eyes across the table, making sure nobody is paying close attention before using your telekinesis to stir the little metal spoon around in your latte. You nod at his mug.
“You take coffee the same way as she did. Boring and black.”
Logan’s nostrils flare a little in a laugh.
“Yeah, and you take yours the same way too. So fucking dense with syrup that it’s not coffee at all.”
“Oh you were always such a coffee snob! ‘Babe you gotta try it plain first so you can appreciate the aroma’,” you say, putting on a gruff affectation as a parody of his voice.
“You do need to try it plain f—”
He’s interrupted when a sugar lump floats into the air from the pot in the middle of the table and launches itself at him, bouncing off of his pectoral. He cocks an eyebrow.
“Real mature, bub.”
“Grouch.”
“Contrarian.”
“I’m not a—” you pause, realising there’s no way to win against that accusation, and grin at him instead.
“Where are you staying?” he asks after a long drink. It’s not booze. He kinda wishes it was booze. But also, he knows it’s best not to go down that path again, for everyone’s sake.
“The mansion. Turns out I died in this timeline too, so you and I are two for two here” - there’s a hint of a smile at your own macabre observation - “but they were using my room for storage so they just let me have it back.” You grimace a little. “It’s been weird. It’s my space but it’s not, y’know?”
“I get that.”
He probably gets it better than anybody. Nice to have someone to share this strange, singular feeling with.
“You should come around. Laura’s there too, I know she’d be glad to see you too.”
“She settling in okay?”
“Yeah. It’ll take a while, but everyone has been really understanding and kind. I think she’ll thrive here.”
“I’m glad to hear that.”
You give him a smile that lets him know you believe it. Your eyes cast over him, taking in this new, slightly more settled Logan, falling still when you see what’s pressed against his fourth knuckle.
“You’re still wearing the ring.”
“Oh,” he replies, surprised. Flexes his fingers as he looks at it. It’s been so comfortable there, so utterly unobtrusive and right, he hasn’t even noticed. “You want it back?”
A beat passes as you consider the question. Coffee is sipped. Another sugar added and stirred, perhaps just for show.
“I don’t know,” you settle on. “I kinda like seeing you wear it but… if you were gonna have my ring, I’d want it to be one that was meant for you.”
He lets that idea settle between the two of you. Suddenly, slowly, you’re reaching forward, laying your smaller hand over his thick, rough one.
“Logan. I want to be with you. In every way you’ll have me, all of it. I don’t know if it was fate or god or plain luck that threw us back together but I’m certain I don’t wanna waste this opportunity. I’d love you in every lifetime, in every timeline. I can’t be without you ever again, I think it would just kill me - and if I know you, you feel the same.”
He doesn’t even bother arguing because he does. When you turned up on his doorstep a scant couple of hours ago a part of his soul had been healed; your existence like kintsugi to piece him back together. A man made of adamantium and gold.
“I’d like that,” he manages.
“Yeah?” Your eyes glimmer with a hope which he’s not been privy to for a long time now.
“Yeah.”
“Well, okay then,” you say with a smile, and drink your coffee.
The two of you do not take it slow. How does one take it slow when your soulmate comes back into your life? You are not exactly the same person he once knew, but you understand each other in every way which matters. Your souls fit together like puzzle pieces. The two of you are whole again.
Then again, perhaps he doesn’t need the version of you he used to have. Maybe, now, he needs this you - rougher around the edges, a little older and more wary, a fit which is better for him. Someone who can put up with his bullshit as Al once bluntly put it.
You barely spend a night apart. You stay over with him on Wade’s pullout (inciting an input of, “something the two of you had better do, we can’t afford a kid on my income—!” before Logan had hurled a water bottle at him) meeting up with him after his shift is done in the small hours, getting something to eat at one of the greasy spoons which remain open. He devours full plates of fatty food; you stick to slices of pie which you feed him bites of from your fork. When you get back to the apartment you cuddle up on the uncomfortable mattress which folds from the sofa and fall asleep in each other’s arms.
He sleeps pretty well nowadays.
The two of you only realise you haven’t kissed yet when you do it for the first time. You’re making a coffee run, tugging on his jacket because you like the smell of cigar smoke and it’s thicker than yours. A little act of intimacy which has become commonplace.
“Same as usual?”
“Mm-hm.”
“Boring,” you make an exaggeration of a sigh, before leaning over the back of the sofa to press your lips to his. He automatically leans into it, tilting his head up so that he can meet you; it’s a chaste little thing, a peck between two people who will only be parted for a moment, but you pull back in surprise when you realise what’s just happened.
“Oh!” you say with delight, eyes sparkling.
Your hand slips around his neck to cradle him, fingers playing with the hair at his nape. You gently pull him back for another. Longer this time. Lips slip together, moving carefully in something a little deeper. When you break for a moment it’s Logan who pulls you back. This third kiss is on the brink of hungry. He slides his tongue to swipe against your mouth and you let out a happy little hum at the intrusion.
His arm curls around your back. With a little tug he pulls you over the back of the sofa and into his lap, making you yelp with glee. His mouth returns to yours, crushing, greedy for any little noises you’re able to make. You relax into it and are happy to take whatever he gives you.
Wade finds you making out on the couch like a pair of teenagers, coffee forgotten. He does not let Logan live it down for a week.
The apartment is fine, but not a long term solution. Wade and Al are constant presences that stops the two of you being fully at ease together. Logan knows that invitation to go to the mansion is always there, but it’s a while before he takes it - he really isn’t sure what he’ll feel, being back at a place he last saw burned to the ground because of his pigheadedness. Might just break him all over again.
But ah, when you nock your fingers in the spaces between his, he can face anything.
One night, exhausted and full of diner food, he agrees to go back to yours - the two of you have had a late night coffee meaning you’re still a tiny bit buzzed, a little too much to fall asleep on the pullout. Instead you get a taxi to yours, near enough, tipping the driver well when he drops you in the middle of a random street and choosing to walk the last minutes hand-in-hand.
The mansion is quiet. Everyone is mostly asleep. And Logan does feel strange being back here, but it isn’t a bad strange. Just another aspect of this new life he has to compartmentalise.
You drag him through low-lit halls, confident in the steps which will lead you back to your room; he recalls a similar journey from his own timeline in the night you first hooked up, smuggling him to your bed down the corridors all wandering hands and breathless kisses and giddy giggles; but there’s no part about you that wants to hide this.
You’d show your Logan off to the world.
You’ve tried to make the room your own, he can tell. It’s pretty big and spacious. Good view. Has an ensuite which he plans on monopolising. He shucks off his clothes and sleeps in just his boxers, arms holding you to him so he can feel every part of your body against his. His chest hair bristles between your shoulder blades and you hum contentedly.
He agrees to come to breakfast the next morning and, to their credit, people are good at not staring. The members of the team he recognises from his past keep their distance unless he seeks to close it. Hank gives him a smile.
“Good to see you, Logan.”
“Mmm,” he manages. Laura comes down to grab something to eat and lights up when she sees him. She gives him a hug which skews on the side of awkward but he’s grateful to receive it, and he can see how pleased you are watching this development.
He comes around more and more often.
Less time spent at the apartment with Wade - who constantly complains about the fact and Logan cannot tell if he’s sincere or not - more living in the pocket of you. He helps you sort out the furniture in the room so that there’s more space; you’re moving a chest of drawers to another corner together when a photo falls out from behind them. Trapped against the wall for years. Long forgotten.
“Oh,” you say, lifting it up and bringing it to your hand with a wave. Your face twists into something strange and bittersweet, a mask Logan isn’t quite sure how to comprehend, but he quickly understands why when he joins you.
It’s a picture of the two of you.
Not exactly the two of you, of course; the ones of you who lived in this timeline. Logan is posing on the back of his Harley, you’re propped up on the seat next to him with your head thrown back in laughter. The two of you look… young. This must have been taken when you first started going out.
Your thumb caresses the photo in a movement he’s familiar with.
“Huh. Looks like we were together here, too. Who’da thunk it,” you mutter.
He slips an arm around you then because he’s feeling oddly sentimental. It’s reassuring. No matter what timeline it is, there’s a you who loves him and a him who loves you. A simple and irrefutable truth, like the fact that the sun rises every day or the moon moves the tides.
“Apparently Magneto got me in the late noughties. Feels like a bit of a pathetic way to go, but diverging timelines, I guess.”
Logan knows that in this timeline, he stuck around for a while after. Poor bastard, he thinks. Having to live those years without you. That’s a misery he understands all too fucking well.
But not any more.
You leave the photo on your dresser, loathe to throw it away, and continue moving furniture to make room for the TV you just bought. Logan hates sharing the one in the living room, especially when the hockey’s on.
Eventually Logan is spending so much time with you he’s barely living at Wade’s any more. You’ve suggested they’d be happy to have him back in the mansion for a “teaching job” like you have, though he knows there’s never much teaching involved, more helping kids learn to defend themselves without too much collateral damage. Still it’s a fair chunk of change better than his current miserable doorman’s salary and it means he’d be living at more sociable hours.
Plus he’d get to move in with you, an idea you’re both secretly happy about.
So he hands in his notice at the bar and packs the scant few belongings he has at Wilson’s into a cardboard box from Bad Dragon, which is strangely the only one Wade could find him (“god Peanut that’s so weird, oh well!”). Looks around the apartment he’s called home for some time, feels not entirely pleased to be leaving it.
“And remember sweetie, if it all goes incredibly wrong and you realise the place you’ve belonged the whole time is on my undoubtedly piss-soaked pull out sofa bed, Al and I will be happy to have you back with minimal taunting.”
Logan fixes him with a look.
“Wilson?”
“Yeah?”
“Thanks.” The word is odd coming from his mouth but not insincere. Wade goes to say something that’s no doubt stupid and inappropriate, however he softens at the last moment.
“Any time. Go get ‘em, tiger, I’m rooting for you.”
You’ve moved your stuff so he can have a side of the closet, and drawers in the dresser, and he resumes his life with you.
It takes only a couple of days for him to settle and realise how much he prefers this. Living with you properly. How, really, he couldn’t stand to be apart from you. How he wants to be there for every second, hear every laugh which drips from you, comfort you whenever something threatens to ruin your happiness.
He falls asleep with you wrapped in his arms every night. Wakes up with you there. Pretty fucking perfect if you ask him.
There’s nothing special about the morning when you first make love except for the fact it’s the morning when you first make love. It’s a border the two of you haven’t quite crossed yet. Almost as if you’re both afraid to make the commitment, like it may break you apart; there’s perhaps an underlying fear that you’re being unfaithful to your partners from your own timelines. That being together like that dishonours their memory.
It’s a salve, then, that the longer you’ve been together the more you realise that you don’t love each other as a stand-in for the ones who died, but entirely on each other’s own merits. He doesn’t look at you and see the body he held in the manor. He sees someone who he’d protect, give his life to, become a dog for because he’s utterly in love with this you, the one who was so happy to find him in the Void, the one who patched him back together when he was at his most broken.
There’s nothing to second guess in this relationship. It is the most solid foundation he’s ever had, and from the way you look at him every morning as if he’s hung the stars, you feel the same.
That morning he’s holding you particularly tight. It’s a Sunday, the quietest day at the mansion, and the two of you are in bed later than you’d usually be. You’re both awake because you’re pressing more and more into each other’s bodies, nestling together like nesting dolls. His arm slung around your waist, hips against the swell of your ass.
You shift slightly and he feels his cock harden in interest. Why wouldn’t it? Most beautiful person in the whole world right here in his bed. He might be old but he’s not a fool.
He’s aware your hips are moving again, pressing yourself into him harder. He lets out a quiet, gruff laugh.
“You’re doing that on purpose.”
“Mmm, maybe I am, Howlett. What are you gonna do about it?”
You squeak with laughter as he surges upwards, pinning your hands to the mattress either side of your head so that he can look down at you. Such a pretty picture beneath him. Hair all fanned out, eyes sleepy and sexy, ready to take in the syrupy-slow pace of the morning.
His lips press into yours softly but firm. You hum into the kiss, slipping your wrists from his grasp so that you can wrap your arms around his broad neck and tug him closer. Your legs slowly match pace, looping at his waist. His cock is free to press against your clothed core now and he doesn’t waste a second of the opportunity; he grinds down, never letting it distract from the kiss for a second, even smiling into it when he can feel the blunt head of his dick catch your clit. You gasp.
“Logan…”
Oh yes, that’s it. That’s the voice. He could listen to you say his name a million times and it would still be the sweetest sound in the whole fucking universe.
He kisses you again and again, getting more fierce now. Tongues slide together and you moan into his mouth. Teeth clack with the force of it. He wants every sense to be drowned in you. Your smell, your taste, your touch. You’re holding him so tightly it’s like you’re worried you’ll just float away from the bliss of it all.
He’d never let that happen. He’ll keep you right here in this bed, forever, if you’d let him.
With a display of telekinesis he’s not expecting, Logan finds himself on his back. You stare down at him with wide, hungry eyes, and he’s never been more turned on in his entire life.
“Can I suck your cock?” you ask breathlessly, and he finds himself huffing out a laugh because fuck, as if you’d ever have to ask. You take his meaning and giggle before you start to make your way down the plain of his chest. A kiss dropped on the top of his pectoral, followed by you moving that sweet mouth around one of his nipples to play with it. Logan huffs and arches into your touch like a schoolgirl. You use your teeth to continue the trail, tracing around his abs - which have become less pronounced ever since he started eating right, and you’ve often expressed your pleasure at this fact - mouthing at where his muscles shape his Apollo’s belt.
Your hand goes to palm his cock through his boxers and he has to make a concentrated effort not to come. It’s been a while since he was touched properly like this, and though he used to be able to go all night when he was a younger man, he truly doesn’t know if he has it in him today.
You seem delighted by this development though. Holding his gaze you slowly drag his waistband down to his thighs, watching in delight as his cock bobs up, half-hard. You take him in hand and pump him lazily, languidly, enjoying every stroke which makes him firmer. You prop yourself up on your free arm, elbow on the mattress and palm cradling your jaw, eyes on him like he’s the show of the century.
“Handsome, handsome, handsome man,” you sigh, dreamily.
“Old man,” he chuckles.
“Not mutually exclusive.”
He has to concede that with the way you’re looking at him like you might eat him alive.
When he feels your mouth around his cock his brain almost short-circuits. It’s warm and wet and willing, your tongue gliding along the thick vein you find there before caressing his head. Logan grunts, fisting the blankets, and a familiar snik has you looking up. You grin around his shaft when you see his claws have popped out from the intensity of his gripping hands.
Pleased, you continue with your work. You bob up and down as the fire builds in his belly, a low heat which is soon bubbling over when he feels you press the tip of your tongue into his slit, humming with pleasure as the taste of his pre floods you. Logan is aware he’s beginning to tighten in a way which suggests that if you don’t stop now things will be over entirely too soon.
Claws retracting, his hand comes to grab your hair. His cock is enveloped in the sweet velvet of your throat, in fact he can feel himself brush against your uvula, and when you look up at him like that he almost gives up completely. He powers through though, carefully guiding you up and off. You wipe your spit-soaked mouth with the back of your hand.
“Oh… was it not…?” you don’t voice the word ‘good’ but it hangs there anyway. Logan rumbles with a laugh.
“Fuck, it was the best thing I’ve felt in years. Wanna fuck you properly, though. Come up here and sit on my face, baby. Need to taste you.”
Your eyes go wide. Like he’s come up with the idea of the century.
“Fuck. Yeah, okay.”
There is nothing elegant about the way you pull yourself up the length of his body, but it is filled with a primal need which is far more sexy. You pause at his abdomen in order to rub your soaked cunt across his abs a couple of times. Fucking the muscles there. You throw your head back in gratification and continue up along his chest before a strong thigh is planted either side of his face.
Looking up at you from his back is his favourite view. Logan wastes no time in clamping an arm around either one of your legs and pulling you cunt-first onto his tongue, you gasp and writhe in delight.
“Oh fuck, Logan!” you hiss. Yeah, that’s it. That’s the voice he wants to hear. All strung out with sex and pleasure because of him. He fucking buries himself in you. Kisses your pussy sloppily, changing his attention from between your clit and your folds, no rhythm to his need. When your fingers scratch his scalp in your need to grab a fistful of hair he thinks he might be in heaven. His hips buck into the air, imagining the action of taking you before he’s even properly started. You start to fuck yourself on his face. Hips grinding down onto his beard, groaning at the stubble there which prickles and pleases.
“I’m gonna--”
“Fuckin’ do it,” he mumbles from between your legs. You cum in his hot, wanting mouth; all the furniture in the room rattles as you let out a little involuntary telekinetic jolt.
You are not done. This was the appetiser. Eyes still ravenous you peel your pussy off of his face, sweeping down to kiss him so you can taste yourself there. Moaning in delight at the musk.
“Wanna ride you…”
“Anything,” he breathes because, yeah. He will do anything you ask, anything you want. He’s a loyal hound at your heel.
When you take his cock it’s with less teasing this time, more intent. Spreading your legs wide you line him up with your entrance and slowly sink down. He wants to grab. Your flesh, the blankets, anything. Sensing his desperation you hold out your hands when he’s far enough inside you and he meets them in midair, pressing his fingers between yours, knuckles white from the effort.
Hips nestle against his. You begin to move.
“Logan…”
Your name leaves his lips in a similar whisper, dragged out through his throat from his very heart. You look down at him, eyes clear and wide and lucid despite the heady pleasure.
“Logan. I love you. I love you.”
Yes, you love this him. Not as a stand in for the Logan you lost, not as some sort of idol on a pedestal, but because you’ve fallen for him just like he’s fallen for you. He is worth loving. He is. He is worthy of you. It is a realisation which hits him with the force of a bomb. He grips you tighter.
“I love you too,” he confesses. He feels his pulse sync with yours from where he’s sheathed inside you, grips your hands tighter because he knows you can take it; you hold him back just as hard. Your hips rock in a wild rhythm as he brings his own up to meet them. It’s hard to know who’s fucking who, it’s wild and desperate and raw, but you keep chanting those words as a manta.
Logan. I love you. Logan. I love you.
He only lets go of one of your hands when he can feel he’s about to finish, dropping it to your clit in order to press rough circles there. You come messily over his cock and he spills inside you, pumping you full of him. Marking you as his.
You collapse into his arms, sweaty and spent. He holds you with arms like iron. Cock still inside, softening now, but he doesn’t want to to break the contact.
You pull back after a moment of breathing together, propping your elbow on his chest.
“Hey.”
He smiles back, a real smile, something he’s not been truly able to produce for years.
“Hey.”
“I meant it, you know. I love you,” you trace a pattern on his collarbone, silly and intimate.
“I know. So did I.”
“Mmm, okay, good.” You kiss him and hum into it. “We should get up.”
“Probably.”
“But let’s not.”
“Sounds fuckin’ good to me.”
You laugh, and oh you are the sunlight.
The summer heat is cloying but Wade has set up some parasols on the top of his building to hide under, he did not specify where he got them but a few local restaurants seemed to be without on the journey back to the apartment. The group of you are definitely not meant to be up here, but with the weather so hot, nobody cares enough to cause a fuss.
It’s a small gathering. Logan stands at the grill because it’s where he’s most comfortable, supervising the chaos. That awful mutt of Wade’s is looking up at him with expectant eyes and, when he’s sure nobody is watching, he throws her a hamburger which she goes crazy for.
And it’s… nice. He didn’t even complain when Wade put on the 1989 album. A few of his old roommate’s friends, a couple of them now mutual - Piotr is a pretty relaxed guy to be in the mansion with, and the two teens who Wade somehow befriended get along with Laura. You’re talking with Peter who for some reason is always at these gatherings but he’s probably the least offensive person here.
He says something which makes you laugh, and you look over to Logan as you both settle. You gesture at the bottle of soda in your hand, an invitation; he nods.
You stand, rummage in the cooler, and close the gap. He eyes the glass bottle of Dr Pepper with disapproval; you give him a playful shove.
“C’mon, be good. You just got your one month chip. Keep it up, we’re proud of you.”
He grumbles his acceptance and takes it. It is pretty refreshing to be fair. He settled the hand he’s not using on the grill around your waist, pulling you so that you settle nice and snug against his flank. You grin up at him, pleased with the show of affection.
“Hey handsome,” you chuckle.
“Hey gorgeous.”
“You make me the happiest I’ve ever been, you know that?”
Day by day he’s letting himself believe it. That he’s the kind of man who could make someone as amazing as you happy, as over-the-moon with joy as you make him.
Before he can answer Yukio appears by the grill, pointing a Polaroid camera in your faces.
“Smile!” she says, and the two of you do, because she’s a nice kid and you don’t wanna let her down. She snaps a photo and watches it quickly develop, shaking it loudly in the air before admiring her work.
“Awww, cute! I hope me and Ellie are like you guys when we’re your age. Here ya go!”
She passes over the photo before skipping away to find her next victim. Logan has to try and hide a laugh at the indignant splutters that are escaping you.
“Our age…?!” you mutter, but soften when you look down at the picture. It’s nice. The two of you make a good-looking pair that’s for damn sure, he can almost understand Wade’s insistence of “letting him watch one night”. But most importantly, the two of you look… happy. With each other. With this slice of life.
“This is a great one,” you declare.
“Yeah,” he says, but he’s looking at you.
When you get home tonight, late by the time you pull up to the mansion, you’ll toe off your shoes as you walk in through the door like you always do, but this time you’ll pause to put this photo in front of the one you found behind the chest of drawers, and Logan will feel content that he never has to be without you again.
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Lucifer Morningstar X Fallen Exorcist Reader
Ever since his split from Lilith Lucifer has been a reck feeling like no one can love him, need him, or understand him again
You have been an exorcist for a couple of thousand years now being one of the best exorcists Heaven could ever ask for
But deep down you always felt bad for those you had killed feeling like yes Hell is for those who have done wrong but what about those who did the wrong things for the right reasons
So on the next extermination day you tried to run away from it all but when Adam found out he took it upon himself to kill you
You were able to get away before Adam could finish you off but nothing could prepare you for meeting Lucifer himself
For some reason Lucifer took you in and helped you out and yes you did come out to him about you being a “fallen angel” and your ideals on heaven, earth, and hell
Lucifer just sat there and listened and for the first time since Lilith someone understood him
Now at first you two became roommates in a way, mostly helping him out with his work, giving him duck ideas, being his bodyguard and secretary, and you did try to push him into talking to Charlie more but you understood on why he couldn’t do it himself
You did face palm as when he called her all he did was tell her to have that meeting with Adam, at least it’s a start
Charlie dose know of you but saw you more as her fathers secretary or his best friend, like an aunt, she is happy how you think there is a way to get sinners in to heaven and how you told her if she ever needs help or to talk to someone you are just quick call
Lilith dose know of you and you may have never seen her face to face she is happy someone is keeping her ex happy
Now if you ever get together it would be the best for the both of you cause I’m sure you would want to confess first but with the thoughts of you killing his people and Lilith, it just made you hesitant but with a simple duck jester (making a duck quack an “I love you”) Lucifer confessed his feelings to you
Charlie I think would be happy for her dad to have found someone and yes at first she did see you as her aunt but she is happy to call you her step parent sand she isn’t afraid of telling everyone that either
That’s one of the major reason on why Lucifer likes you, his daughter loves you like a parental figure
This Lucifer is just a sad boy so if you just sit there and cuddle him he would love you forever and if add words of praise he is just melting
Definitely will vent to you cause he is that comfortable around you and he is happy that you feel the same way when you vent
You always support his duck creations and yes late nights would consist of you two role playing with the ducks, when you two started dating he made three duck versions of you, him, and Charlie all matching clothes sitting next to each other, this man had a whole collection of duck versions of you and he was embarrassed when you found out but you called it cute
When extermination day hits he could see how tense you get and when you told him on what happened before he found you he couldn’t help but hate Adam more and so every Extermination day Lucifer would hold your hand and comfort you may even play a little music and it just grew more loving when you two started dating
You do help out with Lu Lu World as it’s one of Lucifer’s passion projects and no one could believe how upset you were when Mammon created Loo Loo land, you almost put your exterminator skills to use but Lucifer stopped you and let Mammon have his way cause he didn’t want to argue with Mammon so you just had to let it go
You both do play music together as when you were both angels all you did was play music, duets and you can’t tell me you, Lucifer, and Charlie didn’t sing together once
You remember seeing Lucifer’s wings for the first time and how amazed you were as you kept complementing him and that just made his face all red and what made you stop was when he commented o how your wings could have been more pretty then his, you just smile at him
Now here you two have more of a bodyguard/ secretary and famous person kind of relationship even though he may not need it he likes keeping you around and that just help made his feelings grow for you
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