#ask: not worth saving
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((@storiedocs Erui for... who do you want?)) "i'm not worth saving. please."
A low growl was the only responss as deft hands quickly and carefully worked on her injuries. The man's face remained hidden in shadow, with the only clue of his identity being a lone yellow eye.
"And I'm not letting my son lose his partner."
The response was gruff. But he was still gentle as he picked the younger Ranger up and took her to his home, a old farm house.
@storiedocs
#storiedocs :: eruingil#~/ thorn hidden in scars and shadows \~ :: arathorn#ask: not worth saving#*|* scars show that you are a survivor *|* :: arathorn lives#*|* find the man you are/ meant to be *|* :: dúnedain chieftain#*|* my want to protect is stronger than sauron's will *|* :: werewolf thorn
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@storiedocs :: eruingil | reply to this ::
'Not the Chieftain any longer.'
A flash thought; quick to form and quick to fade. It was the truth though. He wasn't fit to lead the Northern Dúnedain anymore. Not since he became a part of the very darkness they fought on a daily basis, even if it had been done against his will. There was no way his former kin would accept or even want him as part of them now. Not since he had been turned into...
A werewolf.
Arathorn stood from where he was crouching to repair part of the wooden fence, running a hand through his shoulder length hair. He tilted his head for a moment at the sound of Eruingil stirring in the farrn house, debating momentarily whether to go in or not. It was the need to make sure his son's partner was healing that got him to move finally.
"Eruingil."
#storiedocs :: eruingil#~/ thorn hidden in scars and shadows \~ :: arathorn#ask: not worth saving#*|* scars show that you are a survivor *|* :: arathorn lives#*|* find the man you are/ meant to be *|* :: dúnedain chieftain#*|* my want to protect is stronger than sauron's will *|* :: werewolf thorn#*|* to walk among the shadows in order to protect those in the light *|* :: between the hobbit & lotr#*|* got lost along the old forest road *|* :: queue
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Why are your children bound by rules you will not follow?
Critical Role, Campaign 3, Downfall Parts 1-3 // Commandments of The Prime Deities according to the Tal'Dorei Campaign Setting Reborn
#you ever think about the ways the gods so often do and occasionally do not follow their own commandments? cause I do. too much#critical role#cr downfall#cr campaign 3#the lawbearer#the wildmother#the dawnfather#the arch heart#the everlight#the matron of ravens#the prime deities#underconsidered part of the 'rules you will not follow' is that celestials are a very unique being. they are not really mortals#and even mortals as we have seen in the campaigns are given much leeway with interpreting the commandments of their deities#i mean. deanna full stop asked the god who grants her power if he was worth saving and did not experience the fjord-like symptoms#of waking up powerless#the gods are like mortals#and like mortals cannot be contained absolutely by rules - no matter how much some of them like the lawbearer might wish that were not true#thats the tragedy. the gods treat their own commandments as mortals treat their commandments: ideals. things to strive for#but not always things to be reached :(#abubakar salim#noshir dalal#nick marini#taliesin jaffe#ashley johnson#laura bailey#brennan lee mulligan#web weaving#web weave#my post
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you were raised in comparison.
it wasn't always obvious (well. except for the times that it was), but you internalized it young. you had to eat what you didn't like, other people are going hungry, and you should be grateful. you had to suck it up and walk on the twisted ankle, it wasn't broken, you were just being a baby. you were never actually suffering, people obviously had it worse than you did.
you had a roof over your head - imagine! with the way you behaved, with how you talked back to your parents? you're lucky they didn't kick you out on your ass. they had friends who had to deal with that. hell, you have friends who had to deal with that. and how dare you imply your father isn't there for you - just because he doesn't ever actually talk to you and just because he's completely emotionally checked out of your life doesn't mean you're not fucking lucky. think about your cousins, who don't even get to speak to their dad. so what if yours has a mean streak; is aggressive and rude. at least you have a father to be rude to you.
you really think you're hurting? you were raised in a home! you had access to clean water! you never so much as came close to experiencing a real problem. sure, okay. you have this "mental illness" thing, but teenagers are always depressed, right. it's a phase, you'll move on with your life.
what do you mean you feel burnt out at work. what do you mean you mean you never "formed healthy coping mechanisms?" we raised you better than that. you were supposed to just shoulder through things. to hold yourself to high expectations. "burning out" is for people with real jobs and real stress. burnout is for people who have sick kids and people who have high-paying jobs and people who are actually experiencing something difficult. recently you almost cried because you couldn't find your fucking car keys. you just have lost your sense of gratitude, and honestly, we're kind of hurt. we tell you we love you, isn't that enough? if you want us to stick around, you need to be better about proving it. you need to shut up about how your mental health is ruined.
it could be worse! what if you were actually experiencing executive dysfunction. if you were really actually sick, would you even be able to look at things on the internet about it? you just spend too much time on webMD. you just like to freak yourself out and feel like you belong to something. you just like playing the victim. this is always how you have been - you've always been so fucking dramatic. you have no idea how good you have it - you're too fucking sensitive.
you were like, maybe too good of a kid. unwilling to make a real fuss. and the whole time - the little points, the little validations - they went unnoticed. it isn't that you were looking for love, specifically - more like you'd just wanted any one person to actually listen. that was all you'd really need. you just needed to be witnessed. it wasn't that you couldn't withstand the burden, but you did want to know that anyone was watching. these days, you are so accustomed to the idea of comparison - you don't even think you belong in your own communities. someone always fits better than you do. you're always the outlier. they made these places safe, and then you go in, and you are just not... quite the same way that would actually-fit.
you watch the little white ocean of your numbness lap at your ankles. the tide has been coming in for a while, you need to do something about it. what you want to do is take a nap. what you want to do is develop some kind of time machine - it's not like you want your life to stop, not completely, but it would really nice if you could just get everything to freeze, just for a little while, just until you're finished resting. but at least you're not the worst you've been. at least you have anything. you're so fucking lucky. do you have any concept of the amount of global suffering?
a little ant dies at the side of your kitchen sink. you look at its strange chitinous body and think - if you could just somehow convince yourself it is enough, it will finally be enough and you can be happy. no changes will have to be made. you just need to remember what you could lose. what is still precious to you.
you can't stop staring at the ant. you could be an ant instead of a person, that is how lucky you are. it's just - you didn't know the name of the ant, did you. it's just - ants spend their whole life working, and never complain. never pull the car over to weep.
it's just - when it died, it curled up into a tight little ball.
something kind of uncomfortable: you do that when you sleep.
#writeblr#warm up#my dad was actively doing bad shit to us and we STILL were told we were lucky . and to a point i do think im lucky#i just think also there's somethin to be said about like. how about we stop using comparison to dismiss ppls individual struggles#yes there are people who have no perspective. for the reference tho having perspective actually made me really unwilling to get help#for what was a serious and debilitating mental health issue. bc i thought i didnt DESERVE IT#and i would rather have 600 ppl who aren't THAT bad get help and get heard and get seen#than make any 1 kid. do the math that i did: look at the world that is dying and the people who are hurting and say#''oh. okay. others have it worse. they are probably better people than i am. i am being unreasonable. i cannot ask for help#i am not good. i am taking too much space. i am not worth saving.''#bc our WHOLE lives we are taught a scarcity mindset - that you can 'steal' from someone. so that instead of changing a system that doesn't#actually offer fair support to everyone#we put the impetus on the individual to just... demand less.#and here's something - there are probably ppl who think i DIDNT deserve to get help#bc i DID have it better than other people#and something about that is ... so sickening. bc i think all of us in some way at some point WILL need help.#we were supposed to make communities. we were supposed to offer our hands. we were supposed to raise the barn#instead we said: it could be worse. now handle it yourself
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happy 24th birthday, felix ♡
#stray kids#skz#skzco#felixleenet#staydaily#bystay#dancerachasource#hyunlixsource#felix#lee felix#mine*#mine: felix#dont ask me how long this took me#my photoshop crashed half way thru and i didnt save some things so i had to do them again#😫🫠#felix is 10000000% worth the effort so its okay#wishing the happiest of birthdays to my little guy 💗💗💗💗💗💗💗💗
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Hey Spamton, how are Pipis created?
#444 frames/layers for the speed and simple movement on this one is this what hell is like#the tab quite literally stops responding for a hot minute when i save it#aha anyways#[you've got mail!]#spamton#spamton g spamton#deltarune#deltarune spamton#deltarune chapter 2#sometimes god hates me and i cannot draw hands even if my life depended on it#pushing through was worth it yayyy woooo yayy i did it i did simple animation yayyy...#love making the eye movements more fluid than everything else to draw your attention to it#because hes not very “vocal” with the rest of his body language and his eyes are a big teller#not saying a lot about the ask in particular its time to use YOUR eyes and figure it out
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something something I turned them into creatures because I saw a few other people do it. I might make Alex and Brian later but I actually have more planned for Jessica and Amy. I guess this counts as an Au...? My brother helped me with Jays design so that was cool, shoutout to @rorystr 🫡
Scratches head, ig like the most I've got for this au is that most mythical creatures live amongst humans, disguised as them, and completely unaware of other creatures living amongst them. (which is too few anyway, they are mythical creatures after all not common creatures) It just turns out that by some insane coincidence, almost all of the cast of marble hornets are secretly dudes in disguise (loud vine-booms). Also the operator sickness is still a thing and the operator is still the same old entity of malice just more fantastical yk? Alright enough of my blabbering I'm sleepy… I want to rant sm about how I think angels and other types function in this au but not rn 💥💥
#marble hornets#marble hornets au#mh jay merrick#jay merrick#mh tim wright#tim wright#my bad for blabbering so much lol#Actually no#not my bad I love rambling on#Feel free to send asks about them… hint hint#Nudge nudge#So many notes on these designs but it's worth it#Jay is really not that good at pretending to be human despite doing it his whole life#Tim wright.. My silly.. Save me…#sol rambles#sol rants
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If when Megumi and Yuuji talk again Megumi asks why Yuuji insists on saving him, and we get a callback to "personal feelings/selfish, emotional decision" i will die. You'll never hear from me again
#itafushi#yuuji no longer thinks that you need a given role for your life to have meaning#and he knows that Megumi's life would have had worth even without a “dignified death”#this isn't about megumi asking to be saved. or dignified death. probably not even about what his grandpa told him about helping people#he wants to save megumi because he doesn't want him to die#akwjakka#idk what im talking about btw its 3am and i can't sleep#jjk manga#jjk manga spoilers#? in the tags lol#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#jujutsu kaisen
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r u chill w non transitioning ppl?
Why wouldn't I be? At one point, every trans person who is transitioning was once someone who wasn't (whether or not that was a choice or their need is a separate discussion).
Hatred of any kind of trans person is not a Righteous or Good Thing - every single trans person has their place, their entitlement to safety, community, and respect of who they are
#ask#anon#trans#transgender#lgbt#lgbtq#ftm#mtf#nonbinary#when i was a kid i cared way more about Earning a spot - about every trans person Proving ourselves#and then i grew up in many ways and experienced many unfortunate things - as a kid who couldn't transition nonetheless#that quickly sobered me to the reality that it doesn't matter what you do or don't do as a trans person#divided we fall. you canNOT give into the divide and conquer strategy - you will NEVER survive#the second you decide that some trans people are worth discarding entirely is the second you set a precedent#and that precedent will eventually choke you. that precedent WILL exclude you eventually#i think a lot of people end up in the place of You Have To Earn Your Spot because they think it will save them...#...those ridged requirements tell you what you need to do to Earn Being Alive...#...if there is no goal where you have earned unconditional respect and security what is there to do?#what would the point be? why should trans people even bother if we aren't guaranteed safety over all?#that misses the true foundation for so many of those requirements is control - not safety or respect#as i have transitioned medically i've learned so much about what the point is#in so many ways i have had really negative experiences because of transitioning - but the joy always outweighs the pain#that joy is what made it worth it
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Trademark: Top-tier Bucktommy writer + generally Cool + getting Buck pregnant
Thank you + thank you + thank you!
#i really do keep meaning to write some actual mpreg fic but it keeps getting swept away by other ideas#like the alien invasion fic i'm dying to write#where tommy gets called to fly against them while the lafd is busy on the ground trying to save lives amid the chaos#and they get word that the entire ragtag squadron of which tommy was a part gets wiped out#buck is so devastated he just shuts down and works himself nearly to death trying to save people trying to make tommy's sacrifice worth it#in a week LA is in ruins and the 118 is barely holding on when they get word that another wave of alien ships is headed their way#they know this is it and just as the ships crest the horizon -- there's one ship that suddenly breaks formation and turns on the others#completely stunned the 118 watches as the ship guns down half of the others then leads the rest on a wild chase#and then eddie shouts 'those are american military flight maneuvers! whoever's flying that thing is on our side!'#buck thinks about the first time he visited the harbor station and he'd jokingly asked everyone for dirt on tommy#and tommy's teammate nico was like 'i don't know about dirt but i can tell you right now: that guy can fly literally anything'#buck watches this one ship attempt the impossible while bobby's on the radio telling anyone who might be listening#that one of their own has commandeered an enemy ship and is holding off the next wave and needs immediate support#eventually the ship lands clumsily on a crumbling rooftop and buck runs up a hundred flights of stairs and bursts onto the roof#just in time to see tommy come stumbling out of the ship -- obviously having been through it and like missing an eye or something#and when tommy sees buck his face just crumbles and buck's already sobbing as they limp-run at each other#crashing together crying and laughing and buck slides to the ground clutching tommy while the rest of the 118 pile onto the roof#and they watch a squadron of f-15s descend from the clouds to take out the straggler ships and it feels like the tide is turning#yeah it's basically independence day but with 2000% more angst
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Been itching to redraw their fandesigns since their reveal in the V9 epilogue animatic 👀🌟 Bow down to the Crown 👑🙇
#rwby#rwby fanart#gillian asturias#jax asturias#rwby before the dawn#rwby before the dawn spoilers#greenlight volume 10#save rwby#dont ask me if gill's dress or jax's swirl pattern was harder#bc the answer is both!! fsdf#but worth the effort though! 😤🌟#asturias twins#the crown#if ya'll haven't read the novels than you better get to it!!!
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no siren like the sea
#animation#artists on tumblr#original character#comic#animating is so fun omg#i wish it was easy to have an art career :( but alas#oh i feel so pathetic bc my work crush never texted me and he doesnt care abt me lollll#my boss asked my today: why do you like him?#and im like girl yea#hes broke#he aint even that cute fr#annnndd#yeah not rly much redeeming qualities#just a nice vibe ig?? but thats it??#like p sure God be saving me from my own ignorance fr DSFGJDS#i kinda wanna try to dress up real cute next week and just idk#put it to rest#if he wont bite after that hes outta my braaainn#lol#why is it so hard to find good men these days#anyway i think i need to do more hobbies and do more fun stuff bc screw it#not worth fr
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Rey, who is in my very biased opinion, one of the funniest "girls" I have because she's just a guy, truly. Like Rey is just short for Reynold because he was recruited by a a goddess to help the hero she selected and the hero is conveniently Reynold's younger brother. So he agrees to help under the condition that the goddess gives him a female body for the other world. She's like "really odd flex but whatever" and gives him a female form and he's like "you know. I can't really blame anyone but myself for not specifying 'please don't turn me into a Lisa Frank personification'."
#my characters#ya know since i draw daily idk if ill do any challenges this month#i know theres a LOT of them out there but i might hold off and do huevember as a challenge and let this month just be chill#for what its worth he only asks for a female body because his baby brother (like 10 years younger than him)#commented ONE TIME ugh its so weird to have you dote on me like this#why couldnt you have been an older sister or look less suspicious#so when sent to help his brother hes like RIGHT GOT IT GIRL TIME LIKE THE MOST LOGIC COURSE OF ACTION#then does a really good job at helping the hero and then gets abducted by the demon army and#as rey keeps challenging the demons checking on him in the dungeon (who are all very kind?) to just interrogate him already#and they just ask why would they do that? they just wanted her outta the way for a bit#cause they dont actually want to hurt anyone and then the demon lord keeps personally visiting rey and continues#to point out how she gives him a headache and how the core is different than the shell#and so then he offers to revert rey back to his original form and reynold immediately accepts#and so now hes just a guy again surrounded by v nice demons#and hes like please just be mean ive been trained to handle violence you have to stop being nice#im not used to nice ok you have to be mean or else im going to develop stockholm syndrome#and the demons are just ?? we dont .... dont know.... what that is.......... what.....#then he gets engaged to the demon lord and all is well ! he becomes the trophy husband to the demon lord#and the world is saved (it was never at risk)#i have a lot of love for the idiots in this plot#because reynold and sascha are literal husbands thinking oh no my beloved husband is only married out of convenience to meeee#and solei is the goddess who recruited him and is so mad that reynold is more of a gremlin than sascha#like why is this mere mortal somehow worse than THE DEMON LORD how in the world#and reynold runs around just adopting all of the demon army and is like yeah#ill be the trophy husband with a hundred kids and a hot 7ft tall demon husband who can change into a huge dragon#and hes really content in this role!#but for a while he does appear as rey and hates how much of a highlighter he is
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I don't know especially with the lastest chapter (ch 265) this just feels so much like Yuuji.
Like especially in the first season people kept asking why he is doing all this, why he wants to save people, why he's beating himself up so much over people he barely knows. People kept wanting to know Yuuji's why and he couldn't explain it he was holding unto the promise he made to his granfther as an explanation but that wasnt really is.
And then you have Mahito who tried to force his own defintion of who yuuji was unto him and beat him down until Yuuji believed it too. He's just a machine killing curses because thats his nature vs Mahito killing humans cause thats his nature. They are beings of instinct slaves to their nature, cogs in the machine. And Yuuji internalizes that so much it weighs so heavily on him the idea that his job isnt to save people but kill curses doesn't sit right with him.
but then at what should be his lowest point he stares his biggest tormentor in the face and said you know what I don't particulalry care what you or anyone else thinks about my reasons. I don't think you have to have grand or innate reasons to do something. Sometimes you just do! and what yuuji wants, more than anything; more than killing curses more than keeping the "weak" safe, is to save his friends. And it's too late for a lot of them, Yuuji was too late but goddam it he won't be late for this. So fuck Sukuna he's bringing Megumi home.
#It's been a while since i did these because I've been off lately but hopefully will fall back into the rhytm of it or atleast once a week#It's also like you can see he has really interalized alot of the advice and love offered to him by Nanami and Higuruma#He'a not trying to kill himself in this fight#quoteoftheday#hell his plans seem to revolve around him making it out alive#Yuuji is finally learning that his life is worth saving and nothing not even Sukuna is worth throwing it away for.#Not when living means he can stick around and keep loving his friends#I mean I'm not even a#itafushi#shipper like that but I can't deny that they won that chapter#Megumi really bros last chance to prove that he can do more than put his friends in danger#Crazy that Yuuji literally started the culling game arc with megumi asking him to start by saving him and here he is starting#really about to be the only person yuuji saves how is that not a win#this latest chapter just relaly got to me it's been a while since I was geniunely excited for JJK.#the bi/weekly schedule really does not do these past final arc fights any favors#quote of the day#itadori yuuji#jjk yuuji#yuuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#jjk megumi#fushiguro megumi#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu sorcerer#sukuna#ryoumen sukuna#ch 265#jjk manga#jjk#dark academia
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can we please not instantly hate on the only other guy showing genuine interest in stolas and act as if he’s gonna end up being a terrible person that blitzø’s gonna “save” stolas from
#don’t get me wrong#i’m rooting for endgame stolitz#but they both need this#stolas needs to learn what it’s like to have people OPENLY want him in the way in he craves to be wanted#the guy didn’t ask for sex#he asked him to dance#and to have fun#kissing him doesn’t make him a bad guy 😭#also the assumption that blitz’s gonna ‘save stolas’ completely invalidates the entire point of this arc#it���d be a lot more interesting if this new guy was genuinely sweet and caring but stolas realizes that he’s still in love with blitz#meanwhile blitz is working on himself and learning to be the ‘better’ that he believes stolas deserves#also we don’t even know if he’ll appear again poor guy didn’t even get a name 😭#but regardless stolas needs to have open and freeing romantic love in order to realize he only wants that open and freeing love with *blitz*#and blitz needs to learn that he *is* worth loving in order to openly love stolas and feel free#helluva boss analysis#helluva boss spoilers#spoilers#stolitz#helluva stolitz#helluva blitzo#helluva stolas
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Why does aziraphale tells crowley he forgives him??? I literally just finished it and its driving me insane
hello anon! hope you're doing okay after that ending!
that's a hell of a question. there are a few different answers, and i think a lot was going on in aziraphale's head at that particular moment, but this is what I took from it:
-this is a dance aziraphale and crowley have been doing for a long time.
there's some sort of moral conflict. aziraphale repeats heaven's party line. crowley asks a bunch of uncomfortable questions. aziraphale doubles down. crowley calls him an idiot. aziraphale forgives him. crowley storms away. pretty much half of their relationship is built on these kinds of destructive patterns at this point--of course they'd fall back into it during the worst fight they've ever had.
-aziraphale is angry.
he's heartbroken, and he doesn't understand why crowley has decided to abandon him in what should be (from his perspective) the happiest moment of their lives since the fall. he's lashing out, and intentionally hurting crowley in the same way he's been hurt. he's not stupid, no matter how much miscommunication is happening in this scene--telling someone "i forgive you" after they've kissed you is going to hurt, and he knows that.
this reading comes mostly from michael's performance. several people have noted that in the moments immediately after the kiss, aziraphale says "I l--" and then cuts himself off. then he goes on a Michael Sheen Face Journey TM and ends up angry, and that's when we get "I forgive you." whatever else is going on with aziraphale in this moment, he's pissed.
-forgiveness is what aziraphale does.
in aziraphale's very first (modern day) scene of the season, we learn that forgiveness is "one of his favorite things." he forgives maggie's rent, and he forgives gabriel enough to shelter him from heaven and hell while he's vulnerable. it's an instinct for aziraphale, for better or worse, whether it's because it's something he thinks he SHOULD do or something intrinsic to him as a person who desperately wants to do good. occasionally, it's even something he does for his own gain. (see: forgiving maggie was a kind action, but he himself admits that part of his motivation was that she always knows how to find his music.) it makes sense that he would fall back on forgiveness as a framework for understanding a mess of complicated and painful emotions. it makes him feel better, forgiving people, and he needs the comfort of that here.
-he means it.
he forgives crowley for saying no. he forgives crowley for breaking his heart. he forgives crowley for always asking 'damn fool' questions. he forgives crowley for kissing him at the worst possible time. he forgives crowley for falling. he forgives crowley for making him doubt. he forgives crowley for being kind, and clever, and ridiculous, and special, and someone he couldn't help but fall in love with, no matter how much it hurts them both.
and unfortunately, forgiveness is the one thing that will always make crowley walk away.
#gos2 spoilers#good omens spoilers#good omens season 2#good omens meta#good omens#aziraphale#crowley#for what it's worth? crowley also meant to hurt aziraphale. that kiss was 40% hail mary temptation 10% a gesture of love and 50% 'fuck you'#and i love it like YES kiss him to hurt him YES tell him the worst thing he could possibly hear and then in 3 years save the world together#with the weight of everything said and unsaid between you!!! drama!!! i hate it here!!! (but i love it)#i hope any of this made sense. i have a lot of feelings about this moment and very few coherent thoughts#and i'll be the first to admit that i find it much easier to get into crowley's head than aziraphale's. i do love him though#asks
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