#aside from Clarice. I liked her a lot

[superseal76]

It is not a weakness of character🥺 | MEDICI 3.06

[phantom-of-the-laboratory]

In case any of yall were wondering why my Clarice Starling interpretation has those big ol round glasses- it’s cuz of Anthy Himemiya.

From a (cinematic? Storytelling? Artistic?) standpoint, I really like the scenes where Anthy’s glasses are cleverly reflecting light in order to obscure her face.

Anthy is someone who has to cloak her emotions often, not allowed to express herself to her fullest. And that- at least to me- resonates a lot with how book Clarice has to push everything down and not react extremely to extreme things, (cuz of her job and also kind of because she’s a woman and thus will be even further judged for reacting) if any of that makes sense. And so I imagine in my head that her glasses do the Anthy thing in scenes where she’s doing this. Particularly in a certain scene in the book where she’s talking to Dr. Lecter.

In the scene, Lecter pushes a crucifixion watch design he made through the food tray in his cell, and then it’s revealed that he had drawn the crucified Jesus Christ of Nazareth with Clarice’s head. It’s a pretty bone chilling scene imo- but how Clarice reacts- or rather- how she doesn’t react is really interesting to me. She just continues on with the conversation. We don’t get to be told exactly how she felt in that moment. Just like how we aren’t explicitly told how Anthy feels in the scene pictured above, during her call with Akio (although the audience can infer how anthys feeling here.)

Pointless nonsense word salad rambling aside, In my head, in that scene where Clarice looks at that little napkin-sized drawing of her being literally crucified- her expression is kinda cloaked by her glasses.

Like the little artistic rendition pictured below

(I really hope this makes sense and isn’t like. An insane leap or a ridiculous comparison to make it’s 3:35 am cut me some slack)

[nekoannie-chan]

I won’t wait for you

Pairing: Steve Rogers X Reader (past).

Word count: 371 words.

Rating: Teen.

Summary: You don’t need Steve.

Major Tags: Angst, mention of cheating.

Additional tags: This is my entry to @caplanbuckybarnes Weekly Writing Challenge! #1 with the prompt:

"You don't get to leave and then come back after all this time and expect me to welcome you with open arms."

@saiyanprincessswannie

My native language is Spanish so I wanna improve my writing skills in English if you notice any mistakes, please let me know and I will correct them.

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You gave a biscuit to your daughter Sarah and another one to the puppy that was only a few weeks old that you had just adopted after the little one had been begging you for more than a month for a pet. You just couldn't say "no" to her; she actually looked a lot like Steve. Although that didn't bother you, you just kept pretending he didn't exist anymore.

You didn't notice that someone was watching them in the park; nothing seemed suspicious, not even when he started following you.

"Y/N, “Steve called out to you.

For a split second, you stopped but immediately kept walking, even though Steve caught up with them.

“Y/N, it's been a long time," Steve said.

“Who is he? “your daughter asked.

“An old work colleague," you replied. “I don't have anything to talk to you about," you mumbled quietly enough so your daughter wouldn't hear.

Steve turned to look at the girl, who looked a little dismayed, and then at the puppy. He stepped aside; it wasn't the time to talk.

You looked at the clock; it was eleven o'clock in the morning, and it wasn't time for Clarice to come home from school with your daughter. John and Clarice were busy taking all the children who were mutants back home after school.

You opened the door and closed it later, but Steve wouldn't allow it.

“Why didn't you tell me I have a daughter?“ Steve reproached you.

"You don't get to leave and then come back after all this time and expect me to welcome you with open arms."

“You just disappeared."

“I saw what you did with Sharon; I had planned that after you got Bucky to safety, I was going to tell you, you know, we don't need you; you'd better go," you said.

"Everything is all right?“ Lorna stepped in; you hadn't even realized when they'd arrived.

“I think you should leave, Rogers; you're not welcome here," Wanda said.

Steve looked down and turned to leave.

“I can still take Sarah for the ice cream I promised her, right?“ Wanda asked, not taking her eyes off the road.

“Sure, she hasn't stopped talking about it since you told her."

[claudeleine]

what would you say your favorite books are from this year? and you would recommend?

ooooo! i think i've read about 24 books this year, and rn i'm reading the vampire armand and the only good indians by stephen graham jones<3 liking both so far!

the hacienda by isabel canas - if you liked mexican gothic, this is a similar haunted house type story, and tbh i liked it more. also the author is a pnw local so <3 i also liked her book vampires of el norte, but i zoomedddd thru this one

the adventures of amina al-sirafi by shannon chakraborty - specifically the audio book though, there are a lot of asides where the narrators are speaking to ppl in the room with them, so it works better if it's like they're telling u the story rather than u reading what they wrote down if that makes sense. the narrators are also just phenomenal

martyr! by kaveh akbar - this book was just beautiful

near to the wild heart by clarice lispector - another beautiful book, i just love her writing style

legendborn and bloodmarked by tracy deonn - a phenomenal low fantasy book, and honestly if the publishing industry wasn't terrible to black women, especially in the fantasy genre, this could easily have been adjusted to be adult fiction/fantasy

starve acre by andrew michael hurley - we love gothic folk horror, it was like the prologue to a horror story but falls just between the chaos. it's a quick read, u could knock it out in a day probably

silver nitrate by silvia moreno-garcia - it takes a bit for the action to get going, but i really liked how well u get to know the two mcs and it really strengthened the story when shit starts hitting the fan. this is the 2nd or 3rd book i've read by this author and i'm not totally sure how i feel about her endings, but i did like this ending more than mexican gothic, which fully knocked that book down from 5 stars to 4 for me lol

carmilla by j. sheridan le fanu - but specifically only the version annotated by carmen maria machado

[saturnskyline]

top 10 female characters

tagged by @dummerjan, thank you!!! <3

rules: name favorite female characters from 10 different fandoms, then tag 10 people

this was unreasonably hard but that's what i get for watching so much bl gkshsjd. anyway this list is about to be wild but here's some of my faves 😄 (i say "some of" bc if i am asked to make a definitive list for anything i will literally die lol)

in no particular order:

1. clarice starling (the silence of the lambs)

not to be a filmbro on main but. i really do love this movie (certain trans stereotypes aside), and clarice is an absolute icon. jodie foster you will always be famous <3

2. tiffy (lovely writer)

she makes me absolutely feral at all times?? bisexual biker girl with the most beautiful smile in the world???? yeah we stan

3. yoon ji-woo (my name)

i'm just saying, i would not complain if she beat me up. in fact, i would thank her for the privilege!! on my knees for her any day, han so hee my beloved

4. toni shalifoe (the wilds)

mean lesbians deserve the world methinks :) love how strong and authentic she was, miss her every day 💔💔

5. shiv roy (succession)

she's a girlfailure, she's mother, she's the loml, she makes me blush whenever she's on my screen bc she's JUST TOO FINE! sarah snook the woman that you are!!

6. ink (bad buddy)

MY SUNSHINE GIRL MY EVERYTHING. love her so dearly, blowing lots of kisses to her at all times 🥰

7. amma crellin (sharp objects)

amma is so layered and compelling and just the best ngl. i've never seen a character like her and idk if i ever will again. legend

8. kate sharma (bridgerton)

i mean. she looks like she walked out of a fairy tale. how am i supposed to not fall in love with her. (answer: it's impossible, she is an angel)

9. fiona gallagher (shameless)

my queen. my ride or die. literally what didn't she do. increased my bisexuality by tenfold, i'll tell you that!

10. miw (3 will be free)

100/10 i would die for her!!!! and btw she has never done anything wrong in her entire life, which is so cool and valid of her

tagging @vegasandhishedgehog @leporschespam @stillqueerstillhere @negrowhat @askanis @waitforthestars @a-slut-for-vegaspete @i-got-the-feels @salamander89 @shesaboozle with zero pressure 💌💌

[akajustmerry]

What are other australian actors/tresses you like that you don't usually talk about?

hello! gonna keep the obvious big names rn (robbies, hemsworths, jackmans, snook) outta this list. stick with ppl i think deserve more hype!

steph tisdel! she's an Aboriginal comedian and her on-screen presence is utterly delightful. her comedy is so brilliantly observational, nerdy and human without being fatphobic. also, I need her and rob collins in a rom-com NOW their chemistry in season 2 of total control made me insane!!!!!

claudia doumit! one of the most beautiful women on earth. most people know her as victoria neuman in the boys and don't realise she's lebanese-australian. i think its really sad she couldn't book work here at home because she's so fucking good!

rebecca breeds! my girl becs was CRIMINALLY overlooked for an emmy a few years ago for her performance as clarice sterling in clarice!! she was so fucking good!!! aside from that, she's in one of my fave Australian comedy films three summers (2017). she has an insaneeeee range she deserves so much hype!

nakkiah lui! more a writer than an actor but if you haven't seen preppers 2021, go watch it now! she's a huge inspiration to me honestly! same for miranda tapsel!

keiynan lonsdale!! most ppl probs don't know that Bram from the love simon movie is Australian and they should because keiynan is bonkers multi-talented. dude makes drops bop after bop on spotify, dances like a maniac, and is such a warm unforgettable screen presence. i am once again begging people to watch my fake boyfriend 2022 on amazon

pallavi sharda! you just don't understand how much i need her to play chloe fraser in a proper uncharted film adaptation. also, pleaseeeeeeee watch wedding season 2022 on Netflix its such a sweet rom-com and i am in love with her

remy hii! another aus actor i just love seeing in things because he was INSANE RANGE. i've seen him thrive in rom-coms, period dramas, crime, whatever, he's a stand out. and he often does work at home too which i love! i got to see him on stage in sydney last year in the tenant of wildfell hall and he was so fun!

geraldine viswanathan! that's my wifeeeee. i know i mention her a lot already but you don't understand she's from the same city as me i love her and she's so talented and she means so much to me!

hunter paige-lochard! incredible Aboriginal actor who really shoulda blown up after leading 2 seasons of Cleverman. he's so handsome and i was ECSTATIC to see him in the newsreader season 2 trailer!

rob collins! i absolutely have talked about this man but you will hear it again!!! please watch firebite on SBS on Demand! but do not watch queen of oz!

i also have particular love in my heart for bigish name actors in a lot of stuff that aren't as well known like miranda otto, david wenham, noah taylor, eric bana, rose byrne, etc but they need no introductions!! also, please just watch Black Comedy on ABC and assume i stan every Blak actor in it because i do.

[peripumpernickel]

Rachel 🤝 Jason

I really like pitting these two against each other and comparing them like specimens in a glass jar because I remember someone said on here that a lot of Rachel’s character is built on her being... well, herself, Rachel King! In other words, a goddamn queen! Clarice even calls her ‘’your majesty” albeit sarcastically. She's strict, she's brave, she's good at her fucking job and that’s an undeniable fact. She keeps things to herself but gets shit done. Everyone knows who she is. Rachel who said “Do you think it bothers me what people call me (queen bitch)? I wear that shit like a badge of fucking honour!”

Bear with me cuz this is a glorified Jason appreciation post. But they also pointed out that Jason’s character, while overshadowed a lot by his ridiculous patriotism and funny accent, he is almost if not just as intelligent and pragmatic as Rachel is. I’m pretty sure he’s the only one in game that acknowledges that Rachel is highly skilled aside from Eric, her husband, so go figure. Merwin’s sexist, Joey died too early, Nick was pretty stupid about being into her, and that was it

And someone mentioned this once in another Tumblr post abt his character analysis (but I cannot for the life of me find it), Jason was at rock bottom and worked incredibly hard to get to his position as a first lieutenant (even with fuzzy intentions), which iirc, he got promoted quicker than most people would have

For such a high rank, he undoubtedly worked his ass off. During the cutscene at the end of the game with the agents in hazmat suits, they remark how Jason was the “best of the best” as a squad leader. I’ve seen lots of people who wonder just how it took Jason to get promoted so fast, w/ such an apparently great reputation? Well.. the answer is that he’s basically a copy of Rachel lol and I mean that in the most endearing way possible

Both of them are emotionally distant, practical, good in a pinch, among other things that just liken them to each other a lot. Ok... maybe they wouldn’t be the BEST of friends... I don’t know how good their friendship would be seeing as they both take their jobs deathly seriously, but hey, you always get on well with someone who’s just like you, right???

augh I don’t know how many times I've replayed hoa and I STILL have things to say about it

[minetteskvareninova]

Minette watches Medici, part 12 (Blood With Blood)

- I see the titles aren’t getting better... Then again, appropriate considering it’s an unofficial Twilight crossover. Yes, I know Volterra is a real city that just happened to be used by Stephenie Meyer as a seat of dark!Aziraphale and his possey. No, this does not ruin my unhinged headcannons in the slightest.

- The main plot of this episode was... A lot. For starters, rejoice, people, Lorenzo de’ Medici finally lost! Granted, it was because he is such a good boy who wouldn’t hurt a fly, but oh well. For real tho, Lorenzo’s actions having realistic (and tragic) consequences was pretty compelling. I completely understand Clarice’s need to give him a reassurance, however weak, and a hug. Hell, by the end of the episode, I wanted to give him a hug! Which is really saying something considering how little sympathy I felt for him before.

- On the other hand, the fact that Lorenzo is such a good boy who wouldn’t hurt a fly kinda makes his friendship with a violent thug like Francesco de’ Pazzi more confusing. Or vice versa, for that matter. Really, Francesco’s turn to the Medici side is justified not at all, and the stupid flashback whose only purpose seems to be to point at old Pazzi and go “look at this asshole, don’t you just hate him so much?” absolutely doesn’t help. Honestly if anything, it makes me hate the writers, not the old Pazzi. This douche really is what I was affraid Albizzi would end up being.

- On the OTHER other hand, however contrived the reasoning behind it was, I still liked to actually see them work together. Why, yes, Italian Ao3, they are pretty shippable. Man, can you believe this mess is the best subplot in this episode?!

- Francesco’s romance with Novella is nice in theory, but the little time alotted to it and Novella’s piss-poor acting kinda ruin in. Again, can you believe this mess is the best romantic subplot in this episode?! Well, that and me x Bianca’s wedding dress.

- Clarice/Lorenzo/Lucrezia D love triangle absolutely does not live up to its potential here, aside from Clarice’s Jolene moment, which I do appreciate, because I am fair like that. And maybe I am foolish, but I still want it to continue somehow, if for no other reason, then because I sincerely hope the writers do not expect us to believe Clarice’s limp comforting of Lorenzo was enough to turn him away from Lucrezia D.

- Giuliano officially earns the medal of the worst boy of this show, because what the fuck was that subplot?! Again, tsundere girl x presumptuous fuckboy is truly the inferior trope, and Giuliano truly is the worst of the fuckboys. Like, of course he had to undress in front of Simonetta for her to feel anything but disdain; like, there is just absolutely nothing good about this dude except his abs! Even then, he in turn doesn’t have Francesco’s cheekbones. Novella truly dodged a bullet here. Human mind cannot comprehend why would Simonetta feel literally anything when confronted with the possibility of Giuliano’s death, other than “huh, a waste of good abs”. Which could work as a motivation to fuck him after he comes from the battle, but I somehow doubt that’s what the writers had in mind.

- For what its worth, I appreciated the relatively realistic image of Early Modern warfare. Even the whole thing where the Florentine commander ordered an attack on a walled city because siege lasting a FEW DAYS would be too long for him could be explained by the dude being on Pazzi’s payroll or something.

[barbwillbrb]

whats something that gives either rackal or clarice the 'warm fuzzies'? just those things where they're very at ease and dare i say, happy?

1. On an extremely lighthearted but very serious/true note: Scratch. They are city kids and didn’t have a dog growing up, nor have either been in a position to have a pet since leaving their childhood home (their mom/dad kept cats and fed the neighborhood birds and Rackal/Clairice would catch/keep fish, snakes, and frogs [the latter two their mom would make them promptly put back outside]).

They now have dog. The world may be ending, they are traumatized, they’re tadpoled, but goddamnit they have a DOG.

This dog is keeping them hanging on by a thread. And then they get the owlbear too?! You know the world sucks but this ain’t so bad.

Scratch and Owlbear helping Rackal and Clairice against psychic damage.

2. Focusing more on people:

Trust/understanding means a lot to Rackal; being able to talk things through means a lot. He’s not one to open up outright about what’s bothering him (it’s easy for him to just push things aside; he doesn’t want to be a bother and thinks some most of his problems are really minuscule in the greater scheme of the mission), but will relent easily if just asked. He holds into a lot of stress, so being able to vent/talk to someone would really help and probably make him realize how tired he really is.

He’s happiest when at ease around those he cares about. I think as the Acts go on it’s not uncommon for him to konk out around the campfire while listening to his companions passively talk amongst each other.

I think Clairice gets thrown off when people very seriously, sternly care for her. She is openly reckless, prone to danger, and most leave her to her own devices (except for her mom and brother— mom at least is trying to stop it, Rackal fluctuates from stopping her to “sonabitch I’m IN”) . So anyone who makes her stay still for a moment, looks over/takes care for her, and is out to protect her— without looking for anything in return— would kinda make her evaluate many things like: “okay maybe this is kinda cool.”

Similarly, she’s happy when around friends/family, and enjoys performing for them. She also definitely tries to get the other companions to join in, and one night when everyones’ all a but tipsy they do grab instruments/play some songs together. It’s a ramshackle mix of awful and wonderful off pitch noise, but it’s one of her fave memories from the journey.

Finally: despite constant bickering, the twins are best friends/have each other’s backs from pregame-postgame. Unfortunately for their companions, their definition of bonding ranges from simply playing with Scratch/Owlbear and talking shit/ranting over a shared bottle of some scavenged booze to setting off explosive bar fights (their favorite forms of distraction involve a bit of drama/action) and blowing up factories.

[house-of-kolchek]

Dangerous Smiles

Clarice Stokes x Reader

Hello!! Here with an unedited Clarice fic based on this ask from @cherrypop-xoxo

Word Count: 1.5k

MASTERLIST

=============================================================

You were having a lot of trouble focusing. 

But she wasn’t making it any easier, in your defense. You’d just met Clarice maybe an hour prior, but already the woman was taking up 95% of your brain. She was just everything, with cool, good looks, a sassy attitude and a wit that could sweep you off your feet.

You watched from one side of the briefing room as she typed away on her computer, blowing a bubble of gum between her lips every few minutes. Of course, you could only focus on her lips, and the slight, confident curve in them as something crossed her mind.

Just go talk to her, damn it.

You were rather robotic in your movements, marching across the briefing room to stand against the table. Clearing your throat, you caught her attention, drawing her caramel gaze to you. She popped one more bubble with her teeth, forgoing the computer to lean on her forearms. Your face grew warm.

“Y’know, I didn’t catch your name earlier,” she hummed, looking up through her lashes towards you. With flushed cheeks, you set yourself on the table, absentmindedly clawing at the tops of your legs.

“(Last Name). (Name) (Last Name),” you offered, extending a hand. She took it without hesitation, and you nearly gasped at the sudden spark, and the warmth that spread through you at her touch. “It’s nice to formally meet you, Dr. Stokes.”

“For you? Clarice is more than okay,” she answered, drawing her hand back to rest on the table again. You took the opportunity to admire her up close, catching the thin ring hooked through her nose, and the floral tattoo across her forearm. They drew your attention for sure, giving her a cool, sexy aura. You gulped, trying to keep your smile as straight as possible.

“Clarice then. Has a nice ring to it.”

She offered you a sly grin, glancing back to her computer, before moving to hover her hands over the keys again. You watched, oddly fascinated by the focused twitch in her brow as she typed. Without breaking her concentration, she blew another bubble from her gum.

“So, what’s your job around here? Are you front lines or behind the scenes?”

“Please, as if I could make it on the front lines,” you huffed, leaning your weight back against your hands slightly. “I’m another weapons tech. They all come to me when their guns are jammed.”

Clarice let out a short chuckle, breaking her gaze from the computer screen once more. 

“It seems you know your way around a computer,” you observed, watching as she made her way into the system.

“Among other things,” she hummed, throwing you a sideways look, and sending your heart into overdrive yet again. “Your friend in the baseball cap was telling me that this place used to be a ballroom.”

Instinctively, your gaze hit Jason, who was being not at all inconspicuous as he stared you down and sent you a thumbs up. You rolled your eyes, though you were unable to hide the slight warmth in your cheeks, and the twitch in the corner of your lip.

“Yeah, I’ve always wanted to see a ballroom,” you mused, getting lost in your daydreams. “It just seems like it would be so magical.” 

Clarice glanced back to you, catching the wistful look behind your eyes, and the gentle smile tugging at your lips. She grinned, pushing the laptop aside and focusing her full attention on you. 

“You know, maybe after all this is done I’ll let you spin me around a little,” she hummed, and your gaze snapped down to the easy grin on her face. She chuckled as you brought a hand to your face, feebly masking the furious blush dancing across your cheeks. You slid off the table, back onto your feet before turning to face her. Clarice stood straight, doing nothing to hide the amusement in her expression.

You cleared your throat, pushing your pride aside and lowering your hand. You had to tilt your head just slightly upwards to meet her gaze, and another flush of heat crossed your face.

“Only if you’re prepared for me to step on your toes,” you teased, fighting to keep your voice steady. You were fully embodying the fake it till you make it mindset as you watched the beautiful woman smile at your comment. 

“I’ll wear my steel-toes,” she replied, offering you a wink before turning back to the new commanding officer. “Presentation’s ready.”

—

The briefing took much too long for your liking. You idly drowned out the arguments between the Colonel and Lieutenant, instead focusing your attention on the doctor standing just a few paces ahead of you. You admired the choker around her neck, and the short trims of her hair that just poked out from under her hat. Her attention drifted between the front of the room and something under one of her fingernails, as she picked the skin around her fingers, as if she had something better to be doing.

It only drew you in even more. 

“Be ready in one hour, dismissed!” As the Colonel ended the meeting, you wasted absolutely no time in evacuating the room. You slumped against the wall of a random hallway, digging the heels of your palms into your eyes. 

Your heart was kicking into overdrive, and your mind was spinning with thoughts about her. You couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like to hold her hand, to feel her arm around you, to feel her lips on yours…

You needed to focus.

“Damn, you’re quick!” You nearly jumped through the ceiling at Clarice’s voice, whirling around to just catch her form. She strode into the hall, with that ever-present grin on her face, though you noticed the slight furrow in her brows. “I didn’t scare you off, did I?”

There was a new twinge in your chest as she questioned you. Her tone was clipped, nearly sounding nervous.

“No!” you nearly shouted, before backpedaling. “No, not at all- I just- I- well.” you trailed off, huffing in a deep breath to calm your racing head. “Would you like a tour?”

Clarice smiled, huffing out a quick laugh. “I just had one, but-”

“Oh shit yeah,” you cursed, wishing nothing more than to disappear at that exact moment.

“But, I would like to hear it from you, too,” she finished, eyeing you with amusement, and… something else.

You glanced back to meet her gaze, masking your embarassment behind a small grin. Not trusting your words any more, you simply nodded, before directing her down the long, empty hallway.

You took Clarice through the base, pointing out interesting facts in the architecture, and voicing your ideas at what the place looked like before it was taken over.

“Hey, you think if Sadaam’s dance partner stepped on his foot, it’d be an instant “off with her head?” Clarice suddenly asked.

“Oh God, I hope not,” you answered quickly, shuddering at the idea. “But honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised.”

Clarice chuckled at that, brushing her shoulder against yours. You stiffened at the contact, the warmth that came from her skin. A blush danced across your cheeks as you glanced her way.

“Y’know, you do seem a little rigid,” she mused, with a short laugh. Your blush deepend. “I wonder if I could help with that.”

Now you were choking on your spit, halting in your steps and fighting your brain to perform a factory reset. Clarice turned to face you again, stepping closer than one would consider professional. Without even thinking, you opened your mouth.

“Well, what do you have in mind?” you asked, surprising both you and her at the smooth confidence behind your voice. Clarice’s grin widened, and she reached to brush a hand across your cheek. 

“Now you’re getting it.”

And then her hand was cupping your cheek and her lips were on yours. You stumbled into her chest, your hands instinctively finding purchase on the sides of her vest as you moved your lips against hers.

Clarice’s kiss was surprisingly soft, and gentle, as she brushed her fingers up your arm, and along the side of your neck. You let your hands wander, reaching to play with the hairs at the base of her neck. She hummed against your lips, sinking further into you and setting your heart on fire.

You parted from her lips, sucking in a breath between your teeth. When you glanced back up to Clarice, she was sporting a large, genuine grin, gazing right back at you with a gleam of affection.

“God, y’know, I could definitely do that again,” you hummed, still fiddling with the sides of her vest. She chuckled, dropping her head until the brim of her hat clipped against your forehead.

“I was hoping you might say that.”

Your eyelids fluttered, as her breath hit the side of her face - 

And then the warmth surrounnding you was gone, and you snapped your eyes open to see her back, a few paces ahead of you. She turned back, shooting you a teasing grin.

“I’ll see you in there, marine.”

You stood in place, stunned. Brushing your finger across your lower lip, you sucked in a deep breath. 

You didn’t know how, but that woman had an iron grip on your heart.

[raspberryfingers]

The Exercise Room (Pt. 5)

Warning: NSFW

“Welcome to the FBI, Officer Lecter.”

“Clarice-“

“Ah-ah, I’m your superior now. That’s no proper way to address me.”

“Special Agent Starling, this is fucking ridiculous.”

Clarice laughed, observing him in FBI gear she’d gotten from the lost and found.

It had been her idea, which he’d fully endorsed.

Now she was having a bit too much fun with it.

“Now, we need to go. Come on, quickly,” she said, grabbing his wrist to pull him. They were in a storage closet.

Hannibal overpowered her, pulling her back.

His hands came to her face, and he shocked her as he pulled her into a deep kiss.

Her hands instantly rested on his chest, and when they broke apart she saw tears in his eyes.

“Hannibal?”

“I might never see you again.”

Her lip quivered.

‘He’s been thinking about it too.’

She reached for his head, kissing him once more. It was deep, tender.

He could taste the raw emotion inside of her.

“But you will,” she whispered.

He wrapped Clarice in his arms, squeezing her tight against his slightly larger frame.

“I love you, my dear,” he said, inhaling her scent and burying deep within his memory palace.

“Oh Hannibal, I love you so much,” she muttered, holding him just as tight.

He ran his hand over her hair, sighing as he pulled away.

“We should go now, Clarice.”

She frowned, nodding.

She stepped out, making sure nobody was near the closet.

Motioning for him to follow, she kept walking.

Hannibal followed several feet behind, keeping his distance in case anything happened.

There were people in the halls, but they all seemed so caught up with their routines they didn’t even bother looking.

He was dressed like them, so why should they?

He kept his eyes focused on Clarice.

His beautiful, beautiful Clarice.

He liked her hair quite a lot.

Clarice rounded the corner, and saw the one person she really didn’t want to.

“Starling! Oh thank god, I’ve been looking all over for you,” Jack Crawford sighed out, embracing her.

Jealousy filled his insides.

He knew it wasn’t like that, but after teasing her the way he had, it still made him angry.

Hannibal needed to put it aside right now.

He didn’t turn the corner, but he pretended to fill a cup with water at the small station.

Clarice looked over for a moment, and he could see how terrified she was.

He gave a reassuring nod. Play along.

“Mr. Crawford? What’s happening?” She asked,

swallowing as he pulled away.

“Lecter, he’s escaped from Baltimore State. I want you to stick around for a little bit. Not sure I’d feel comfortable with you being home by yourself right now,” he said, rubbing the back of his head.

“I uh- I had plans tonight, Mr. Crawford. You don’t need to be worried, Doctor Lecter would never hurt me,” she said, smiling to lighten the mood.

“You’re so certain, Clarice. You don’t know what he’s capable of.”

“I know perfectly well what he’s capable of, Sir. But he said he’d never call on me, and he’s not a liar. If it makes you feel better, Ardelia’s gonna be home,” she reasoned, pressing her lips together.

Jack sighed and nodded.

“Alright, Starling. Well, lemme at least walk you out. Where’d you park?”

“Uh, come on, we’ll go ‘round this way,” she said, and they walked through a quieter hallway. A lot of the rooms this way were pretty empty until later in the day.

It was still only about 8:00.

Hannibal was less following now and more waiting til they turned corners to follow after. Clarice couldn’t even hear his footsteps, but she knew he was there.

“Say, Starling, I gave it some thought, and you know what? If you really love this guy, I say go for it, don’t let anybody else stand in the way,” he said, smiling at her.

She wanted to throw herself off a balcony. She was sure Hannibal was smiling.

“I wish it were that simple, sir,” she said, smiling and looking down.

They’d walked into a more open area, two large doors for an exit.

“I’m sure you’re overcomplicating it, Starling. In laws warm up eventually, and you’re a great kid, so-“

He turned to face her, and he felt his whole body go cold.

Hannibal was only a few feet behind her.

Crawford’s eyes went wide. Hannibal grinned at him. Nobody else was there.

The whole scene seemed to play in slow motion, and simultaneously it was the fastest few seconds of recognition.

Clarice could see the look on Jack’s face. She dreaded turning around, but she had to. She had to, because otherwise she’d seem too calm.

She turned, and as soon as she saw Hannibal, he quickly moved forward and Crawford pulled his gun.

Her eyes went wide.

‘No. I won’t let him.’

“NO!”

She immediately jumped between the two men. She couldn’t let Hannibal kill Jack, and she couldn’t let Jack kill Hannibal.

This was against the plan.

If he’d been spotted Clarice was supposed to do the exact opposite of this.

But she couldn’t.

Hannibal understood. He’d prepared.

In less than a second, she felt cold metal against her throat.

His harpy.

“Come on now, Jack. Let’s not be unreasonable, you don’t want me to slice up dear ol’ Clarice here, do you?” He grinned, and it sent shivers down her spine.

She nearly cried.

Hannibal was covering for her. A mistake in reflexes could be excused. If he hadn’t ‘threatened’ her then it would become clear she was protecting him.

She nearly wished he hadn’t.

Clarice needed Crawford to know.

“Lecter I swear to fucking god, get your hands off her,” Crawford held his gun steady.

“You wouldn’t want to lose her, like Bella, hm?” Hannibal laughed, playing the part.

Clarice didn’t have to pretend to look terrified.

She was so absolutely terrified that Crawford would shoot.

Jack swallowed.

“I’ll put a bullet in your head.”

“Not before I slit her throat. Drop the gun.”

Jack Crawford looked into Clarice’s eyes. He was afraid.

He began lowering it to the ground.

“Good boy. Go on, slide it over,” he instructed, watching him bend.

As he did, Hannibal took the chance.

“I’ll find you in a month, Clarice.”

It was only a whisper, and it took her a second to process.

She didn’t want to wait a month.

The gun slid across the floor.

“Thank you, Jack. See you around.”

Hannibal ran, and Clarice ran into Crawford’s arms.

Act distressed, don’t let him chase him.

She began to sob, and that was real. She’d never felt more scared in her life.

If Crawford had shot, Hannibal would’ve died immediately.

She could picture it so perfectly in her mind, his lifeless body spread on the ground.

There would be so much blood, she didn’t doubt she’d be covered in it.

She sobbed more, a weak feeling in her stomach.

She was so scared of losing the only person she had left.

“Oh Starling, I know, it’s alright, you’re safe now,” Jack said softly, kissing the top of her head.

She wished she could explain it wasn’t like that.

——

“Uh, here, this is the guest room.”

Clarice stood awkwardly in the doorway.

“Mr. Crawford you really don’t have to-“

“I’m scared, Starling. Can’t lose you kid, so just for the time being, a week or so,” he said, sighing. She could see the concern in his eyes was genuine.

“Doctor Lecter would never hurt me, Sir.”

“Starling he held a knife to your throat, he almost-“

“It was an act. I was his pawn, he didn’t want you to shoot,” she said, half telling the truth.

“He would’ve done it.”

“Respectfully sir, I disagree.”

“Lecter’s lied before, why do you think he gives a damn about you?”

Clarice inhaled and paused. Impulsive decisions had always been her specialty.

“Because he loves me.”

Jack turned to face her.

“You seem awfully sure, Starling. He’s only talked to you a few times.”

“He’s talked with me quite a lot, sir. To find Jame Gumb and when we needed information about Doctor Chilton. Six times in person… and uh, I’ve called him before,” she said, looking away and unbuttoning her jacket, trying to seem casual.

“You have? To talk about what?” He asked, furrowing his eyebrows.

“Whatever I feel like. He’s a good conversationalist,” she pointed out, looking back at Crawford.

“Clarice, I told you not to tell him anything and you’ve been calling him? How many times?”

“I’m sorry, sir. I lost count. Every week for quite a long time,” she said, tears swelling in her eyes.

“And you didn’t think to tell me?”

“I knew If I did you’d start taping calls, and it felt rude. Han- Doctor Lecter and I never discussed anything more than food, music, philosophy, human functioning, that sorta stuff. There wouldn’t have been a need to tape them,” she defended, crossing her arms.

“It’s a safety breech, Clarice. You know that. If you needed a pal you coulda found one that maybe wasn’t in prison for murder,” Jack said, sighing and rubbing his forehead.

She looked down.

“He’s different.”

“Clarice?”

It was only for a millisecond but he heard an unshakable softness in her voice.

She looked up.

“Mr. Crawford?”

“You said he loves you. How’s that?”

She swallowed.

“He’s told me, sir.”

Jack’s lips parted. Clarice, for the first time in her life, couldn’t read his face.

Instinctively, tears filled her eyes.

“When you asked me in the car- this guy you can’t be with- oh fuck, Starling.”

Jack Crawford was in utter shock. His legs nearly gave out, but Clarice rushed to help him sit down.

“Please, please tell me you didn’t help him escape.”

“I had no idea until this morning. He found me when I was alone near the showers,” she said, only twisting the story because she decided Jack Crawford didn’t need to know that they’d fucked in the shower.

She had already told him too much, but she felt a great relief.

“He was with you on the way out. You were sneaking him out, Starling.”

“If he was found he would’ve been shot on sight, Mr. Crawford. I couldn’t let that happen.”

Her voice was quivering, and a tear rolled down her cheek.

“And you love him too?”

She swallowed and nodded.

“I do, Jack. It wasn’t up to me. If I had the choice I woulda gotten with some stellar reputation agent. I can’t help it, Jack,” she said, tears beginning to stream. He hated seeing her this way.

“I should fire you right here and now, Starling.”

“Sir, I’m begging, please don’t. Don’t fire me. I’ll quit, I’ll do whatever, but I can’t take it,” she sobbed.

Clarice rarely cried, and when she did it wasn’t over stupid things like this, but the day had been so trying she couldn’t stop herself.

“What’s the difference, Clarice? Between you quitting and you getting fired?”

“If I quit I don’t gotta feel like you’re angry and disappointed, Mr. Crawford. I can’t stand letting people down,” she choked out.

His eyes softened, and he stood, taking her in his arms.

He squeezed tight, his own eyes watering.

“You’ll never disappoint or let me down, Starling. Certainly can’t be mad if you fell in love with someone you shouldn’t have. Not your fault,” he said, stroking her hair.

She wrapped her arms around him too, her tears falling on his shirt.

“What do I do, Sir?” She asked softly, hiccuping.

“I don’t know, Starling. But I can’t trust you with the sick bastard unless I really know you’re safe,” he said, sighing and looking at her.

She couldn’t even take offense to it.

“I’m safe, sir. He’ll kill to protect himself, but he’s not a danger anymore,” she said, looking down.

“You think you can change him?”

“Not what I said. He values his freedom too much now. Would you give up your job to have Bella back, all to yourself?”

A look of regret filled his face as he nodded.

“He’ll give up those impulses if it means freedom.”

“He better be damn careful if he ever wants to see you again.”

“Please don’t kill him, sir.”

“I can’t control other branches, Clarice. I’ll influence what I can, but you know the second someone turns up dead and eaten I’ll-“

“I know, sir. But as long as Doctor Lecter’s on his best behavior can you promise to stay away? For me, Mr. Crawford.”

He paused and nodded.

“I- I don’t trust Lecter, but I trust you. If you’re in love with him despite knowing what he’s done- I can’t say you don’t know what you’re signing up for,” he sighed, shaking his head and sitting back down.

Something came to mind.

“I’ll have to run, won’t I, Jack?”

He looked up at her with sad eyes.

“If you wanna be with him, yup. They’ll find him pretty quickly if he stays around. Your roomie, Mapp, would be terrified.”

“She found out first. Caught us on the phone.”

“How’d that go?”

“Got real scared for me, thought he’d manipulated me. Threatened to tell you,” she said, sighing. She hadn’t seen Delia since yesterday night.

“Did he manipulate you?”

“No. Never.”

“When did it start, Starling? The feelings?”

“They’d always been there, but I think I only realized after I went to talk to him about Chilton.”

“What happened?”

She paused, swallowing.

“I asked him for information about Chiltons death.”

“And?”

“And he gave it to me..”

She trailed off in a way that suggested a ‘but’ or a second part.

“But?”

“But uh- he wouldn’t tell me unless I uh- unless I-“

“Oh Christ, Starling. You sure didn’t include that in the transcript.”

“Didn’t think you’d appreciate it. I’m sorry, sir.”

“I know you’re grown, Starling. Just feels wrong to think about. You’re like my daughter. I oughta go chase Lecter off the lawn with a shotgun for pulling that.”

She smiled and laughed.

Her own father hadn’t seen her grow old enough to get the chance.

“I won’t talk about it anymore, sir, but it made me realize… I- well, you know,” she whispered, and they both looked down.

“Todays been an interesting day, kid.”

She laughed and nodded.

“You wanna go get ice cream? Or if that’s not your thing we can go get drinks.”

“Ice Cream sounds great, sir.”

——

“Crawford knows. I told him last week, while I was there.”

“How’d that go?”

“Went well. He wasn’t mad.”

Ardelia sighed.

“Clarice I just- I need you to explain it to me. Because I’m worried for your safety, but if you really love him, I wanna support you, because I’m still your best friend.”

“I love him, Delia. Honest to god, it’s nothing but love,” Clarice confessed, sitting down across from her in the living room.

Ardelia rubbed her forehead.

“You really know how to pull the short end of the stick, dontcha, Clarice?”

“Nothing short about that stick.”

They made eye contact, and immediately burst out laughing.

When they composed themselves, Clarice frowned.

“I know he’s done things that are horrible, and I know I should hate him for all the people he’s hurt, but when I- when I’m with him, when I’m talking to him, everything seems right. I should think he’s insane, a maniac, but when we talk it’s just like- like he seems so sane. When I first met him I was nervous, I was afraid, but over time he just- he kinda let down his walls. He was intrusive, he asked questions that fuck with your head, but it’s almost a defense. He needs the upper hand of screwing with your brain because it’s the only hand he’s got and he’s learned to play it well. But when we stopped playing that game, I could see the sadness in his eyes, the love. I expected him to be cold, but he’s so- so warm. I can’t explain anything, Delia, but he’s suffered. He says nothing happened to him but it’s so- so clear. He’s been hurt. And I guess I don’t mind too much about the killing because generally he doesn’t kill on impulse. It’s a choice, and he has murdered innocent people, but he’s also murdered Nazi’s and harmed pedophiles. There’s mixed feelings, but I can’t stop loving him,” she said, eyes watering.

Clarice wanted one thing, for Ardelia to understand. If she could have that, she’d feel at peace.

Ardelia came to sit beside her, and they hugged.

“I don’t understand it, Starling, and I’ll still be worried about your safety, but you’re a grown woman and you don’t make bad decisions. I trust you, girl,” she said, wiping a tear from her face.

Clarice smiled, nodding and sniffling.

“Thanks, Dee, I needed that.”

“You and me, always girl.”

——

It had been a month.

Clarice hardly slept.

She’d continued with regular life, her job was fine, and her relationships had even improved.

Her and Jack Crawford got lunch every weekend, sometimes they went out and sometimes she came to his house. He made Bella’s recipes.

Her and Ardelia spent a lot more time together, doing simple things like laundry, but they had fun.

But Clarice had been miserable the last week and a half.

“Dee, he said he’d see me in a month. He’s nowhere to be found and it’s making me nervous. What if something happened?”

“Clarice, if something happened it woulda been all over the news and Jack Crawford woulda called you. You’re overthinking, I’m sure you’ll see him soon.”

“But what if I don’t? Maybe he just wanted his freedom,” she whispered, voicing the concern.

“Then who cares, fuck him, he’s missing out. You need to stop mopping. Let’s go out tonight, dress all slutty and go clubbing,” Ardelia suggested, grinning.

“What if he shows up and I’m out?”

“I’m sure he’ll track you down. He’s not stupid, don’t worry,” she laughed, shaking her head.

Clarice sighed.

“I don’t think I even own anything ‘slutty,’ Delia.”

“Oh but guess what, I do.”

——

The club was loud, and Clarice felt out of place.

It was impossible to relax. Ardelia had instantly begun dancing with some guy, but Clarice stood on the outskirts.

She looked hot enough to drool over dressed the way that she was, but she felt as if she looked stupid.

She hadn’t shown this much cleavage since highschool.

She desperately needed a drink.

She approached the bar, sighing.

It didn’t take long.

“Hey, can I buy you a drink?”

A young guy stood beside her, smiling. He looked a bit stupid, but she’d never say no to a free drink. Free things are free.

“Sure, why not.”

“What do you want?”

“Whatever you’re gettin’.”

The guy smiled and gave the order to the bartender.

After further conversation, she learned his name was Chris.

She couldn’t have cared less, though.

Her mind was still on Hannibal.

Why couldn’t it have been him that offered her a drink?

She sighed again.

Her and Ardelia had very different definitions of relaxing.

And speaking of Ardelia.

She approached Clarice, arm hooked around some handsome guy.

“Hey Claire uh-, mind if I get out of here?”

Clarice smiled.

It seemed every time they tried to go clubbing together Ardelia always left halfway through to hook up with some new guy.

“Sure Delia, have fun, be safe.”

“Here, get a cab ok?”

She handed Clarice some cash, and she nodded.

Ardelia giggled and quickly pulled the guy off.

Watching them leave, Clarice sighed.

“Sorry about that, continue with what you were sayin’.”

“Oh, it’s just that I-“

Chris paused, noticing a detachment on Clarice’s face.

“I’m sorry, am I boring you? I didn’t mean to I just-“

She felt awful.

“You’re alright, Chris. It’s my bad. I’m honestly here tonight to get my mind off someone and it’s not workin’ too well,” she explained, looking off with a sort of despair in her eyes.

“Oh. I get it. Well, maybe dancing will help. You any good at dancing?”

“Not really, but fuck why not?”

“We oughta have a few more drinks first, makes it more fun.”

More than a few more drinks later, Clarice was on the dance floor. And she really was dancing.

Her hips were swinging, she wasn’t entirely sure who she was dancing with at this point.

None of the guys there were complaining.

And lots were certainly watching.

At this point Clarice was sure she was dancing with Chris.

He spun her around, and when she faced him, a brief soberness hit her.

“Hannibal?”

“I admit, Clarice, coming here to find you wasn’t ideal, and neither was watching you intoxicate yourself with that absolute idiot,” he said, placing his hands on her hips and moving into a natural rhythm with her. He didn’t want to get hit by anyone else dancing.

“Hannibal what are you- what are you doing here? Oh my god am I on drugs?” She slurred, hands on his shoulders.

“You are not on drugs, Clarice, though you are extremely drunk. I’m rather worried, but I suppose stepping in just now was beneficial, as I have been rather enjoying watching you dance,” he teased, smiling and pulling her closer.

Their hips moved naturally, and they made an extremely powerful couple with no effort at all.

The music was loud, and the lights made everyone in the room look colorful. Yet somehow it was simultaneously dark.

It set a mood, and pressed against Hannibal the way she was, Clarice wanted more.

Whatever cologne he was wearing smelled delicious.

“I wanna fuck you so bad right now,” she whispered, hips rolling against his.

“Of that I have no doubt, but I won’t allow it. You’re intoxicated.”

She felt disappointed.

“But I haven’t seen you in more than a month.”

He leaned into her ear, wanting to make sure nobody else heard, though he wouldn’t have cared If they did.

“I’m aware, and when you sober up tomorrow, Clarice, know that I’ll fuck you so hard you’ll see stars,” he hissed.

She shivered, closing her eyes and inhaling. He smiled.

“Can I kiss you?” She muttered.

“If you’d like, but that’s the most I’ll allow.”

She wasted no time grabbing his shirt and kissing him. He could taste the cheap alcohol on her lips, and was somewhat discouraged, but not enough to pull away.

“C’Mon, dance with me, Hannibal.”

Clarice turned herself so her back was facing him.

She lifted her arms, placing her hands on the back of his neck. He stood stiffly, unsure of what to do. Her hips began to sway and grind, and he couldn’t seem to choke out a single word besides her name.

“Clarice…”

“You’re not dancingg.”

Slowly, he moved to match her pace. It was sensual, delicious. Here in the dark club nobody would recognize either of them. They were free here.

He could hardly focus on anything besides her ass against his crotch.

And god, her dress was so short.

Why did it have to be so short?

He began kissing her shoulders as she swayed, which made her giggle.

He had self control, and he’d never ever have sex with a drunk woman, but he knew fully well even if she’d been sober, Clarice would’ve enjoyed provoking him this way.

They kept dancing, easily making the most attractive couple there. Not based on only looks, but pure attraction. There was a chemistry there obvious to everyone around them.

Chris had gone to get drinks when Hannibal had stepped in.

When he saw them dancing, he didn’t come back.

Clarice turned around again, facing him.

She looked so beautiful like this, and Hannibal wondered how much convincing it had taken for Ardelia to get her to wear it.

In all the time Hannibal had known her, she’d never been one for cleavage.

Though, perhaps it was because his interactions with her were limited to work.

Yet he had the general feeling Clarice was generally modest.

Seeing her in this dress made him wish she wasn’t.

Hannibal Lecter was no doubt a breast man.

Hannibal sighed. He began to feel guilty. Clarice was beyond drunk. He needed to get her home and put her to bed.

“Clarice, I ought to drive you home now.”

“But I’m having so much funnn,” she whined, laughing and kissing him again.

He did pull away this time.

“I know my dear, we’ll come back. You’ve had a long night, hm? Let’s get home.”

“You’re no fun.”

He put his arm around her, guiding her out.

Too many men were staring at her, and naturally feeling possessive, he placed his coat on her shoulders.

They could stare, but they couldn’t do much else.

Clarice was his.

Hannibal drove her home, and he made a sudden realization.

“Clarice, did you go with Ardelia?”

“Ahummm. She left with some other guy before I even started dancing. She told me and I said it was alright. She does that all the time, gives me some money for a cab,” she mumbled.

Hannibal sighed as he pulled into the driveway. He knew Ardelia meant the best, but if he hadn’t been there, he doubted Clarice would’ve been able to even call a cab.

But again, he also doubted Clarice ever got that drunk to begin with.

Hannibal helped her from the car, picking her up much like a bride.

The Bride of Frankenstein.

“Come, let’s get you to bed.”

He carried her inside, taking her up to her bedroom.

As he did, he realized it would probably be best to have her throw up first.

He helped her to the bathroom.

“Can you throw up, Clarice?” He asked softly.

She groaned. Having the toilet bowl available, it didn’t take long for her to empty her stomach. Being as drunk as she was, he assumed she must’ve been miserable. Ejecting all that garbage probably felt good.

Cleaning her up, he helped her change into her pjs, which was a tedious process. He would forever remember to never get her this drunk.

He placed her in bed, arranging the pillows and setting a bucket by the bed. He had to make sure she wouldn’t roll onto her back.

He tucked her in and went to leave. He’d planned to come back, he just wanted to get a book.

“Hannibal stayyyy.”

“I’m coming back my dear.”

“Come sleep next to me.”

“Will you sleep if I do?”

“Ahuh.”

“Very well.”

He turned off the light, undressing down to his boxers and getting in bed beside her. He’d originally planned to stay up, but it had been a long night and he found that he was rather tired as well.

They both drifted quickly.

Clarice groaned loudly after waking up.

She threw up again.

Hannibal was holding her hair back.

She hadn’t fully processed anybody beside her yet, only the sensation of her guts being emptied.

“Fuck.. I drank so much,” she muttered.

“You certainly did.”

She jumped, eyes widening.

Hannibal chuckled.

As memories came back, she sighed.

“That’s goddamn embarrassing. I’m so sorry, Hannibal.”

“Don’t be, my dear. I apologize. I realize it took me a bit longer than I’d planned. I never meant to scare you,” he said softly, holding her in his arms.

“I shoulda trusted you, I just got so upset. I missed you so much,” she said, head still throbbing.

“Do you have any Advil, Clarice?”

“Yeah, there’s a bunch of medicine in the middle drawer in my bathroom.”

Hannibal nodded, getting up and grabbing some water and medicine.

He decided Advil might not be the best option if her stomach was still weak.

“Here, drink. I’ll make you some breakfast. When do you expect Ardelia to be home?”

“Pretty soon unless she actually likes him. But most likely in an hour or so. She stays for breakfast and then never comes back,” she said, laughing.

“Well, maybe you ought to come with me then. I don’t want Miss Mapp to come home and scream at the sight of me,” he said, smiling.

Clarice rolled her eyes, following him to the kitchen. She had noticed her discarded dress.

Hannibal had put his pants and shirt back on, though he looked messier than usual when it wasn’t tucked in. She liked it.

“Hey Hannibal, we didn’t uhm- y’know…”

“No, we did not have sex, Clarice. Though you rather wanted to, I knew you wouldn’t appreciate it when you became sober, and I also have no interest in fucking someone who’s drunk, especially to the degree you were last night,” he explained, grinning at her.

She sighed, burying her face in her hands.

“I’m so sorry, Hannibal, honestly I-“

“You’ve been doing a lot of apologizing, Clarice. Do I need to therapize you?”

“Oh fuck off.”

“There she is.”

Clarice glared at him.

“Wipe that shit eating grin off your face.”

“If you wish,” he said, trying not to laugh.

Clarice smiled, shaking her head.

The meds had helped somewhat, but breakfast smelled delicious, and she wanted it desperately.

“Are you still nauseous, Clarice? Some people get extremely uneasy after vomiting.”

“Nah, I’m good. If I had a weak stomach I don’t think I’d be working in the line of work that I do,” she laughed, shaking her head.

“Yes, I figured as much.”

“Are you afraid of throwing up?”

“I’m a doctor, Clarice.”

“So? What’s that got to do with anything?”

“Come eat.”

That instantly silenced her.

She rose from the couch, joining him at the counter.

“You mind if we eat here?” She asked, smiling as he handed her a plate full of food.

“Considering the state your table is in, no, I do not mind,” he said, glancing at all the junk on her table.

She grinned.

“Well maybe If you’d told me you were comin’ I woulda cleaned up a bit,” she said, pointing her fork at him accusingly.

“Perhaps I like to see how you live. I imagine you more clearly when I’m gone that way,” he said, and she noticed a sadness in his eyes.

“Jack Crawford knows. He said he won’t do anything to actively look for you, but other departments are out of his control,” she explained.

“Jack Crawford doesn’t care that his prized student is fucking his mortal enemy?” Hannibal teased.

“He was uneasy at first, but you can’t help falling in love sometimes, and I think he got that,” she said, sighing.

“Well I’m glad he knows and understands. I know he’s like a father to you,” he said softly. She gave his hand a squeeze.

“I'm just- he said- he said I’d have to run. If I wanted to be with you we’d have to run,” she said softly.

“I don’t think the oath you took is applicable when you come home to a serial killer, Clarice.”

She sighed.

“I know, I know. Just- I don’t wanna leave Delia and Mr. Crawford,” she said softly.

“I know, Clarice.”

“Maybe if I- if I make it look like I’m just moving somewhere, I could still come back and visit them,” she said.

“We mustn't worry about it yet, Clarice. Not yet. You’ll see them again, I promise, my dear,” he said, looking over at her.

“Where would we go?”

“Argentina. They expect me to be in Europe, I imagine.”

“Argentina doesn’t sound awful,” she said, thinking about it. She knew a decent amount of Spanish, though her accent would undoubtedly be horrible.

“You’ll have to trust me, Clarice.”

“I do trust you.”

“Then we’ll be alright. I promise,” he said, standing from the seat. He kissed her sweetly.

She leaned into him, face buried in his chest. His breathing was so pleasant to listen to.

Something else from the previous night popped up.

“Hannibal, you said once I sobered up you’d-“

He chuckled.

“Yes I did.”

“Well I’m all sober now.”

“Ahuh, I’m sure. Wait until tonight, Special Agent Starling. We wouldn’t want Miss Mapp catching us in the act, would we?”

“Oh fuck Ardelia, I’ve walked in on her so many times she deserves it,” Clarice hissed, standing and kissing him eagerly.

Hannibal gripped her throat.

“Ah-ah, be a good girl, Clarice. Patience,” he whispered.

“All I did was kiss you,” she said, glaring.

“Ahum.”

He kissed her now, holding her face gently.

“Thank you for saving me, Clarice,” he whispered.

“You saved me first,” she mumbled, embracing him.

He lifted her, carrying her back to her room. It wasn’t lustful, it was gentle.

He sat on the bed, and she straddled him.

He held her so close she could feel his necessity to never lose her.

“It’s alright, Hannibal,” she said, stroking his hair.

“I will love you for the rest of my life, Clarice. Even if you decided I wasn’t the right man for you, and you moved on, I would never be able to let you go. I would love and protect you until I died. I will never let anything harm you,” he whispered, and her heart broke.

“I’ll never move on, Hannibal. I’m not letting anybody hurt you either, you know that,” she said, kissing his cheek sweetly. He leaned into her touch, taking in every little bit that he could.

He would never look at her from behind the glass again. He refused.

“Clarice, I love you so much, my dear.”

The way he said it was almost as if he was gasping for air. She was his oxygen.

She saw tears slip from his eyes.

“Oh Hannibal,” she kissed him, framing his face with both of her hands. He was immediately receptive, wanting her comfort. He wanted to join his soul with hers, to be inside of her.

“Don’t cry, Hannibal, don’t cry,” she said softly. This was the first- no, it was the second time she’d ever seen him cry.

The first was in Memphis.

She’d only seen the tears in his eyes for a second. The real empathy he felt for her, the pain of knowing he’d never see her after Chilton dragged her out.

Well, things had worked out, he supposed.

When Hannibal opened his eyes from their kiss, he could see Clarice crying too.

Immediately his embrace tightened.

All they could do was say each other’s names, body’s softly shaking as they cried into each other’s necks.

It felt so good like this.

They felt so free.

“Let’s- let’s go back to sleep, Hannibal,” she whispered, sniffling.

He nodded, placing her down on the bed. He closed the blinds and curtains, along with the door, and stripped down again.

Hannibal felt no need to ask why she wanted to sleep. He wanted to sleep too.

He softly closed the door and joined her in bed.

Clarice snuggled closer to him, and he held her.

They’d slept in the same bed last night, but they hadn’t slept together.

It would be their first time sleeping with each other.

He could smell her shampoo, and it warmed him completely. Her breathing was so soft.

Likewise, her head on his chest, she appreciated the rhythm of his breathing, and she could feel his heart.

“Are you alright?”

“I’m more than alright, Clarice.”

“Your heart is pounding a lot faster than 85.”

“So it is. Do you see the effect you have on me?” He said, smiling. She smiled too.

“I do.”

They slept until the afternoon.

When Ardelia still wasn’t home, Clarice found she’d left a voicemail on the phone.

“Don’t worry Clarice, I’m safe, I’m spending the day with the guy I left with last night. His name’s Logan, I really like him to be honest. Anyways, call if you need anything, bye.”

Clarice smiled. Good on Ardelia.

“Is she coming home?”

“No. She’s got herself a boyfriend apparently,” Clarice laughed, sitting on the couch.

“Unfortunate that she has one before you.”

Clarice looked over. Her heart sank.

“Hannibal?”

“You never agreed to be my significant other, Clarice. When I asked at the asylum,” he explained.

He seemed nervous, hopeful. Clarice now understood.

“You’ve been my boyfriend for quite some time now, Hannibal,” she said, watching him as he sat beside her. She placed her hand on his thigh, and they leaned closer to each other, naturally receptive to touch.

“Then I wonder if- if perhaps you’d marry me, Clarice. I would be so honored as your husband,” he whispered, shaking.

Her eyes lit up, and she kissed him.

“I would be so honored as your wife.”

He immediately kissed back, passion and love consuming him.

Ardelia wasn’t planning on coming home anytime soon.

He had no excuse now.

Hannibal pressed Clarice into the couch, getting on all fours above her.

She craved his touch, and as they engaged in a lustful, wet make out, she opened her legs, wrapping them around his waist.

She pulled down, pressing his crotch between her legs.

“Clarice..” he hissed at the contact, moving down and kissing her neck eagerly.

She grinded against his hips, and he inhaled sharply.

He left hickeys on her neck, and momentarily wondered why he’d bothered putting his clothes back on at all.

Maybe to make Clarice work a little more for it.

In a sudden, fluid movement, Clarice had somehow pushed him back instead.

She was straddling him now.

“I’m surprised, Hannibal. I didn’t think you’d let me get away with that.”

“I wasn’t sure what you were doing.”

She laughed softly, teasingly undoing the buttons on his shirt.

His hands moved slowly up and down her thighs, until they found a nice resting place underneath her oversized shirt.

The contact of his rough hands on her hips made her suck in a breath, and she pulled his shirt off completely.

She lowered herself down, kissing along his chest. She sucked at his collarbone, leaving a nice mark when she was finished.

Clarice continued this all the way down his chest. Hannibal guessed she felt the primal urge to mark what was hers.

She could feel the bulge in his pants between her legs, and she took advantage of it by tightening the grip her hips had around his waist.

He groaned softly, and she smiled.

“Hannibal, who would you say is the more dominant one?”

“We both have our moments, don’t we?”

She kissed him, and her tongue was in his mouth. He loved every second of it.

“And don’t go thinking that just because you’re on top right now means you’re in control,” he hissed, lifting a hand to her throat.

“I never said I was.”

“Good girl. Let’s move this to your bedroom, hm? I think I’m a bit tired of fucking you everywhere besides a bed,” he muttered.

“I’d greatly appreciate it.”

He chuckled, sitting up and wrapping his arms around her waist.

“Grip my hips like you’re trying to tease me, Clarice. There, good girl.”

He stood from the couch and carried her to the bedroom.

He gently placed her down, kissing her cheek as he did.

It was not their first time, and yet here, in the privacy of her bedroom, he felt so calm.

There was no worry of getting caught, no fear of her leaving. There would be no quick redressing when they finished.

It was not exclusively the orgasm Hannibal was chasing, it was being able to hold Clarice afterwards, naked and raw.

He again got on top of her, slowly kissing her.

Clarice’s hands moved into his hair, kissing back just as softly.

Nobody understood as well as she did that Hannibal Lecter could be an extremely emotional man, and those emotions needed to be nurtured when they did appear.

She too understood that for once there was no stress. The adrenaline of getting caught could be fun, but it wasn’t healthy.

They required real privacy, and they finally had it.

She slowly reached for his belt, and he kissed her neck as she removed it.

She tugged at his pants, and he quickly discarded them.

His boner was extremely obvious through his underwear.

He lifted her shirt over her head, and she was only in underwear underneath.

His head instantly fell to her breasts, taking her nipples into his mouth.

She gasped, holding his head there and arching her back.

“Hannibal… Hannibal take your boxers off,” she said, trying to reach for them.

He quickly did as she had asked, and she pulled him into the bed, positioning him so his head was on a pillow.

She was on all fours above him, and she reached for his erection, smiling and taking it into her mouth.

Hannibal groaned, placing his hands on her ass as she continued.

“Clarice… oh Clarice,” he gasped, legs spreading and tensing up in pleasure. She placed her hands on his thighs, holding him still.

Hannibal reflected that he must be the luckiest man in the world.

She was so focused she hardly noticed his removal of her underwear.

Clarice had him in her mouth, and meanwhile he got a perfect view of everything.

He pulled her body closer to his face, and she realized what he was about to do, an excited shiver running through her.

He gently pushed her legs apart, letting her body come lower.

Clarice gasped as she felt his warm, wet tongue against her clit.

She moaned, and then let her head go back down to him.

The couple was a mess as this mutual act of fellatio was performed, moans and groans muffled by each other’s bodies.

Hannibal suddenly moved his tongue up, pushing it inside of her.

She gasped, and he continued eagerly.

So did she.

Her tongue swirled just as it had their first time, and he shuddered.

“Clarice… Clarice, please, I’m going to- I’m going to-“ he was moaning out, and he tried to make her stop. He didn’t want to finish this way, but she wouldn’t relent.

She continued with more vigor, and she began to suck. The sensation ruined him, and he groaned loudly, gripping the sheets.

“Clarice! Clarice I’m so close, don’t- don’t…”

It was too late.

He could feel his orgasm shake his body, and there was relief.

Clarice had not removed her mouth. She had not removed it last time either.

It seemed his sweet girl was fond of swallowing his cum.

He shuddered, his release consuming him.

Clarice turned and faced him, smiling.

There was still cum on the corner of her mouth.

He went to wipe it with his thumb, and she gripped his hand, sucking it off his fingers.

Her eyes were so filled with lust that it nearly frightened him.

“Clarice?”

“Yes?”

“You’re going to ride my face now.”

“Am I?”

“Yes, you are.”

He pulled her hips up, and she was hesitant at first.

“I don’t want to suffocate you,” she said softly.

“You won’t. Though if you did I don’t think it should be such a bad way to die,” he teased, licking the inside of her thigh.

She shuddered, holding the headboard.

Clarice lowered her hips slightly, still hovering.

His tongue licked between her folds, and she gasped.

Hannibal’s hands went to her hips, pulling her down more until she truly was riding his face.

She moaned as his tongue worked against her clit, bucking her hips slightly. The friction felt so good.

Her knuckles went white on the headboard, pleasure consuming every thought in her head.

“Oh fuck.. Hannibal,” she moaned, legs shaking.

He chuckled, and it gave her a sensation beyond description.

It resulted in such a whine erupting from her throat it nearly shocked him.

Instead, it inspired him to continue with more passion.

She was shaking, feeling a pressure build inside of her.

“Just like that.. I’m s-so close,” she whined, hips rocking against his face.

He felt the primal instinct to thrust his own hips. He was so incredibly turned on that it was hard to contain himself.

“Fuck! I’m so close,” she gasped out again, one hand gripping his hair now.

“Hannibal… Hannibal! Fuck! Hannibal!” She cried out, orgasm shaking her entire core.

She moaned loudly, and Hannibal held her hips firm to his mouth.

His tongue never stopped, and she was so overwhelmed tears filled her eyes.

“Hannibal! Hannibal please!”

Either the last orgasm hadn’t ended or a new one had started, but she was an absolute mess.

He let her rest, slowing his tongue and allowing her to catch her breath.

After a moment, she slowly removed herself from his face and collapsed next to him on the bed, still out of breath.

He placed gentle, soft kisses along her body, wanting to comfort her.

“Beautiful Clarice…” he muttered, kissing her cheek.

She turned and kissed him. They could taste themselves in each other’s mouths, and it created a mixture of the two.

Hannibal moaned into her mouth, and she smiled.

“Do you want me to get on top?” She asked softly.

“No, my love. In fact, if you need some time to rest I can wait. I understand you’re quite overwhelmed right now,” he said, kissing her neck gently.

She held his face.

“We’re not finished here until you’ve cummed inside me twice,” she whispered, licking her lips.

He grinned.

That was what he liked to hear.

He got on top of her slowly, kissing her as he did. She held his face, love in her eyes as she gazed at him.

“We can take our time now, my dear.”

She smiled.

“I know. I know.”

He positioned himself at her entrance, slowly pushing in and watching her face as he did.

He pulled out after a moment to let her adjust, and then pushed in once more.

He repeated this twice more before pushing himself all the way in.

Clarice gasped out as he did, and he smiled. He loved feeling her body against his own.

He began with slow strokes, and she held his head, sighing out in pleasure.

“Oh Hannibal… I love you,” she whispered, tears in her eyes.

“Clarice?”

“We finally have peace, Hannibal. No more sneaking around,” she whispered, and he understood immediately.

Hannibal pressed his forehead against hers.

“No more sneaking around, my love.”

The strokes were slow, but they had passion, and so much love.

Tears came from their eyes as they made love. Tears of sweet relief.

They finally had privacy, and freedom.

Hannibal buried his face in her neck, and Clarice wrapped her legs around his waist as he thrusted.

He felt so good, and she could enjoy it more without being scared or worried.

She felt safe and protected the way he was covering her with his body.

“F-Faster, Hannibal,” she whispered after a moment.

He, of course, complied.

As he did, she moaned, and it moved him to kiss her.

She loved it when he was rough, but she truthfully loved this more, the slowly building sensation in her stomach.

She clenched around him, and he groaned.

“Clarice… oh Clarice,” he gasped, lifting his body to look at her. He was thrusting faster and harder now. But it wasn’t rough, just passionate.

She moaned, back arching as he hit her g-spot.

“Fuck! Right there, Hannibal,” she whined, holding the sheets.

He grabbed her wrists, holding them above her head.

“Be a good girl, Clarice,” he muttered, kissing her.

They both left their eyes open, watching each other’s every move.

Their breathing was heavy, and Hannibal moaned as he watched her. He was nearly overstimulated.

Clarice looked so beautiful underneath him like this.

Her breasts moved with each thrust, and it took everything inside him to not orgasm right then and there.

Clarice was close too.

The reality of Hannibal above her, thrusting inside her, hit like a train.

She could look down and see him between her legs, and the visual made her shake.

“Hannibal… Hannibal I’m so close,” she gasped, and he moaned, eyebrows raising in his pleasure.

“Good girl, good girl,” he muttered.

“Look at me, Hannibal, look me in the eyes,” she whispered, and he immediately looked at her. The desire and pleasure in his eyes set her off.

“Oh fuck,” she moaned, every muscle in her body tensing up.

By this point, he knew Clarice’s sexual tendencies fairly well, because not only had they engaged in plenty of sexual activity together, but each encounter had been replayed over and over in his head.

It had amazed him to discover those memories in his memory palace.

She was orgasming now, and he knew.

He continued with more vigor as she shook, and she nearly screamed.

“Hannibal! Hannibal! Oh- oh fuck! Hannibal…” she was crying out, gasping for air.

She’d never felt an orgasm like this before.

He let himself go, finishing inside of her.

The relief felt amazing.

He collapsed on top of her, and she leaned into his neck.

His weight felt comforting to her.

And thank god for birth control.

He pulled out after a moment, licking his lips and swallowing.

“One more round, Hannibal.”

“As you wish, my love. I’m at your disposal.”

“I want you to fuck me from behind, please.”

“Do you have preferences as to what position I put us in while doing that?”

Clarice thought about it for a moment.

“Here, lay next to me,” she said softly.

Hannibal did as she asked, laying on the left side of the bed.

He turned to face her, and she smiled.

Her body was facing away from him, but her head was turned over her shoulder to meet his eyes.

Hannibal gripped her hips, pulling her closer. She was incredibly turned on, and surprised that he still had the energy.

“We can take a break if you need to, Hannibal,” she offered.

“Do you need one?”

“No, not really. Do you?”

“No. I know I’m an older man, Clarice, but it’s quite hard to suppress my lust for you. I promised I would fuck you until you saw stars, didn’t I?” He explained, hissing the last part.

She shivered, and his hands worked up and down her body.

Clarice couldn’t answer, she was too excited.

Her skin was warm, and god she was beautiful.

He kissed her shoulder, and thought to himself for a moment.

“Do you mind that I’m an older man, Clarice?” He asked, hand moving down her thigh.

“No. Why would I?”

“I’m more than twice your age,” he noted.

“Then you can fuck me with more than twice the experience,” she whispered, smiling and leaning back to kiss him.

“I would venture to say you have more sexual experience between the two of us, Clarice.”

“Doesn’t matter. I like your maturity. You know what I want,” she said, kissing him again.

He kissed back quite passionately this time.

“And what is it you’d like right now, Clarice?”

“To be fucked.”

He chuckled, looking down at his erection. That had happened rather quickly. Clarice was truly special, he supposed.

“I think I’d rather make love to you, Clarice,” he said softly.

She kissed his cheek, and he reached to line himself up.

They held eye contact as he pushed himself in, and they both moaned softly.

It only hurts for a moment.

His strokes were slow, loving.

Clarice leaned her head back into his shoulder, and he kissed her cheek as he continued to thrust.

Hannibal let his hands roam her body, touching her breasts with eager excitement.

“You’re quite beautiful, Clarice,” he whispered, kissing her.

She smiled.

They stayed like that for a while, slow thrusts. It was not the orgasm they were chasing currently, but the love and the pleasure. It would not bring orgasm at this pace, but neither complained. The warmth of each other’s skin and the intimacy of physically being a part of each other was enough.

“Hannibal… you feel so good,” she whispered, voice quivering. He inhaled and let his hand go between her legs.

She sucked in a breath as he began to gently rub her clit.

“Christ…” she muttered, leaning back into him.

He grinned.

Her legs spread, giving him more access, and he eagerly complied.

His thrusts became faster, and he was obsessed with the way her body was rocking up against him.

There had been so much pain and suffering in his life, but if it had all led up to this, he supposed he didn’t mind it very much at all.

Though he had no doubt, even had none of it ever happened, he would’ve found Clarice. Soulmates meet one way or another.

Every thrust clouded her thoughts. She couldn’t think about anything but how good he felt.

Clarice Starling was certainly not a virgin, she’d had sex plenty of times with plenty of guys.

But this? This feeling?

It was only felt when Hannibal fucked her.

He didn’t have nearly as much experience, but his body worked so well with hers.

And perhaps it was because she loved him so much.

Hookups never feel as good as having sex with someone you love.

Perhaps Hannibal was right when he said they were making love.

He was so warm, his hands all over her.

It felt so good, having the sensation of his full attention.

Hannibal began to kiss her neck, and Clarice moaned in response.

“F-Faster,” she mumbled, and he moaned into her neck, thrusting faster and rubbing her clit with a bit more vigor. He didn’t press down or make it uncomfortable at all, and the sensation made her legs shake.

“F-Fuck! I’m gonna come…” she whined, grabbing the sheets.

“No… not yet,” he whispered, picking up pace.

He was hitting her g-spot, and she was a moaning mess.

“Fuck.. oh fuck, Hannibal. Hannibal!”

Clarice was gasping for air, pleasure consuming every nerve in her body.

She was shaking, and Hannibal held her close to him with his free hand.

“Good girl, Clarice. Such a good girl for daddy, aren’t you?” He moaned, feeling her clench around him.

“Hannibal… oh fuck.”

“I love you, Clarice. I love you so- so much,” he choked out.

Clarice moaned extremely loud, louder than he’d ever heard her moan before.

“Oh fuck.. Hannibal!”

Her body shook, and her vaginal walls caved in around him.

He groaned, feeling himself come inside her.

He bit into her shoulder, holding her close.

“Clarice… oh, Clarice…”

He was panting, and so was she.

Hannibal loved Clarice so much he couldn’t imagine living his life any other way.

Laying there besides her, naked and sweaty, they both understood that nothing would ever be easy for them, but that it was ok.

They’d get through it together, just like always.

[thelovelyghostwriter]

Ranking the HxH guys in my Simping Tier: Countdown

Note: This is just for fun and lame-ass humour. You are free to like anyone in hxh and this tier doesn’t reflect how great the character is. It’s just a ranking based on how much I simp for them. 

14. Meruem

Okay. There’s a reason why Meruem is at the last list. He’s an ant. He’s not even fully human FML. Can’t believe people wanna fuck this teenaged mutant ninja ant. Can’t even say those people are a furry because this ant has no fur. It’s a no for me. 

13. Illumi

The Illumi simps are gonna hack me for having him too low. I find him cute and has really nice hair that can be for shampoo ads... but his eyes... it covers 70% of his face. It’s guppy eyes. It’s like he wore those coloured contact lenses that enlarges the eyes. 

12. Shalnark

OKay. Shalnark is cute. He’s really one of the most good looking guys in the series. However, I don’t know why but his personality is kinda “ehh”. He’s a little psycho who controls people with his phone, but somehow his personality is overshadowed by a lot of extreme characters with Hisoka. Also, I try not to get too attached to him because of what happens in the current arc. 

11. Kite

Okay. This is weird but... I find Kite more attracted when he’s a red-headed female ant right now. Okay. I know I went all like “MERUEM ISNT EVEN HUMAN” but female Kite LOOKS human. She has freckles and all that. It’s real cute. But I’d say he’s a little lower because he doesn’t really have that “oomph” personality so-

10. Pariston

Now, talk about a character with FABULOUS presentation of himself. Pariston shows himself off with extravagance. NOW, that’s a personality. He’s like one of those celebs that are just so extra like Lady Gaga that it’s amazing. I know he’s underrated in the simping world, but he’s essentially kinda like Hisoka (who has a big simping fandom), only he prefers to play with people’s minds rather than fight people. 

9. Tserriednich

You might be wondering, why the fuck is he here? Okay, first of all, he reminds me of Hannibal who is by the way, charming. And yes I mean it in the Mads Mikkelsen AND the Anthony Hopkins way. Makes me wanna his Clarice but I’d rather have Theta have that spot. Secondly, he’s a prince so being his bride is literally a dream come true. Thirdly, yeh, Tserriednich is actually very handsome. Nice blond hair and that facial beard. 

8. Gon

He’s quite low on the tier because I had always seen him as a cute green mini-Ging. Personality-wise, he’s really sweet and I can see a lot of girls liking him because he knows how to treat women respectfully. He can even handle the crazy ones like Palm. His alpha side came out during the Chimera Ant arc and his adult form is hella attractive. 

Jokes aside, this character is really amazing as an MC. It’s sad that he gets overshadowed but I believe he’s a pretty unique shounen MC because most of the time, a shounen MC doesn’t kill or has a pretty much black-and-white morality. Gon Freecss breaks that stereotype and he’s truly appreciated. 

7. Leorio 

Listen to me. This man is supposed to be the type of man you’re supposed to marry. Doctor, loyal, caring and funny. This man is the total package. I think the reason why he’s a little lower in my simp tier is because well... he’s the type of guy that I will go for in reality. In fiction, that’s where all my crushes for crazy guys should be. My simp tier is based on my heart, not brain. 

6. Killua

Okay. I was down bad for Killua when I was younger. DOWN BAD. So down bad that it was scary. I sort of got over him now. But what can you do? Killua is simped by a lot of teenaged girls or women who had a crush on him since the beginning of time. He’s fiercely loyal, has white hair and pretty blue eyes, is a fun mixture of mischief and seriousness. He’s the type of guy you can count on to get out of trouble and one to always treasure you. I do think that if I ever meet Killua though, that he’d bully me to oblivion. 

Okay, we’re at the top 5. From here onwards, some real NSFW simping words.

5. Hisoka

I kinda do understand Hisoka stans, but at the same time, I do not get them. Like him or not, he’s a very flamboyant character. He stands out of the crowd and he just have that unexplained charisma. 

He’s actually a really well-written character. He’s the balancing factor in the narrative of HxH. He’s like the joker in the deck of cards. Back to my simp tier, he’s very attractive ESPECIALLY with his hair down. There’s a certain aura that is addictive about him that I can’t pin-point. And for that, he earns my top 5 spot.

4. Feitan

I swear. This simping phenomenon actually manifested from Hiei. Yes, Feitan’s character blueprint, Hiei from Yu Yu Hakusho. (The real OGs will know that Hiei is the character blueprint, not Levi). I know a lot of people compare him to Levi but let me explain why Levi and Feitan are alike: it’s because their character blueprint is Hiei. 

Anyway, Hiei is HOT. And to me, the hxh equivalent is Feitan, with a huge addition of sadism and emo-ness. Okay, that makes it even hotter. 

I have read some Feitan/Reader on AO3 and BOI. I enjoyed reading certain stuff that I never thought I would enjoy. I read a fic about Reader-chan getting whipped and basically all sorts of BDSM and OMG it’s heaven. 

“They say all good boys go to heaven, but bad boys bring heaven to you”

3. Chrollo

At first, I didn’t really care about Chrollo until he wore that tuxedo and let his hair down (Is it just me or a lot of hxh boys look good with their hair down?). HE LOOKS SO GODLY HOLY FUCK.

I’m 100% sure that his character blueprint for the hair-down is Koenma. He also gives me Tuxedo Mask vibes. Overall, such chivalry and handsomeness all in one man. Not to mention, that sexy sexy voice when he recites his fortune-telling. I would say he has the sexiest voice among all hxh guys. He is just that HOT and charismatic. I wanna see where he hid that Spider tattoo and scratch his back. 

2. Ging

Okay. Ging is hardly simp by girls. And I do not understand why?? He is motherfucking attractive. Even now. GAWD. I love him.

I think my attraction to him pre-started because he looks and acts SO much like my childhood crush Yusuke Urameshi from Yu Yu Hakusho. I know he’s an asshat but he’s a CHARMING asshat. Yeap, I said it. He is actually highly intelligent and just acts like a total haggard because he can. 

It’s not just when he’s young. I STILL think he’s hot even in his 30s. He’s not that old for me to me honest. I don’t care if he’s a decade older than me because I think that’s the appeal of it. I

It’s kinda sad that he’s not that popular because I need some Ging/Reader smut content. Like, I envisioned a smut fic where the reader is like in her 20s and is strangely attracted to Ging. He’s wildly confused over this but he’s seriously considering of tapping it because his old ass haven’t had any action lately. The other Zodiacs are also confused and are convinced that he must have given some sex pollen to the reader because who the hell is sane enough to be attracted to him? (But it’s just that you need some acquired taste to actually find this man alluring). He’s one of the most fuckable characters ahhh. 

And... for the last one...

Drumroll please....

1. Kurapika

Seriously, was there even a surprise. 

THIS MAN IS THE AKAKU GOD. He’s beautiful, he’s sexy and fucking dominant (yes, I say he’s domineering because do you see the way he throws a hot tantrum during the whole YorkNew arc, demanding shit from his enemies, taking charge of everything?) His chains drives me nuts. I love it when he gets angry. I know he’s kinky on the inside. When he wore that tuxedo... ooof. He looks hella fine. He’s the only guy in hxh that fulfills my ala Michael Corleone mafia boss kink. I want him to ^&*(%%%*%^ (to save myself from embarrassment, I self-censored) as we attempt to repopulate the clan and produce more scarlet eyed babies, as he whispers some real degrading and possessive shit in Kurta while he tells me what to do. AHHHHH. *bye gotta go write some kuraneon porn now byeee*

[thefanficmonster]

All Worth It

Jason Kolchek x Clarice Stokes (The Dark Pictures Anthology: House Of Ashes)

Warnings: Spoilers for the game House Of Ashes, Mentions of Death (Near-death experiences too), Injury, Blood, Bombs and Explosions, Swearing

Genre: Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Romance

Summary: She gets better, contrary to what everyone else was thinking. Everyone else but Jason who had faith and refused to leave her side. That much devotion is worth a spin, isn’t it?

Requested by Anon (dw your identity is safe with me :D ) Thank you so much for your request, dear! I honestly had a ton of fun writing your request cause this ship is super underrated (not saying Jalim doesn’t deserve the fame - it definitely does). Hope you enjoy what I’ve cooked up here for you! Love, Vy ❤

“Hey, hey, hey.“ The gentle shake on her almost startles her, momentarily forgetting where she is and who’s by her side, “What did we say about falling asleep on me?“

Clarice groans and coughs, going to move her arm and rest her hand on her forehead but the Lieutenant watching over her, who wouldn’t have been put up to such a high rank if he didn’t have fast reflexes, wraps his hand around her wrist, securing the arm in its place. “I get not falling asleep cause I might not wake up, but what is the problem with me moving my goddamn arm?“ She complains, wiggling it to set it free but doesn’t make another attempt at lifting it.

“No problem with moving your arm, Doctor Stokes, but moving that arm is gonna cause you some problems and we don’t want that, do we?“ The Southern drawl is so familiar and welcome to have talking to her, especially in that slightly hushed tone, she almost smiles, but instead chooses to open her eyes and look at the stoner-turned-soldier in front of her. The eye contact between the two only increases the population of butterflies in her stomach, forcing her to direct her look anywhere else for her own sake.

Little does she know it had the same effect on him too.

“You’re wasting your materials on nothing, I hope you know that.“ She comments bitterly as she looks up at the IV bag hanging above the makeshift bed where she’s lying. “As a Lieutenant you should know better than to allow this waste, Hotshot.“

Jason scoffs with a smile - an inevitable reaction reserved only for the instances when she uses that nickname for him. It came up out of the blue back at the mansion and perhaps stuck around. Bottom line, he doesn’t mind it. If anything, he likes it.

“And you should know better than to let your spirits get so low.“ He replies, giving her hand a little squeeze which she returns, “You should know better than to lose hope.“

“The whole mission can’t be put on pause because someone is hurt, can it? It’s marine work, people get hurt left and right.“ She stands her ground, gritting her teeth at the guilt that’s gnawing on her from the inside. Clarice is a smart, bright and quick girl, to be bedridden in a tent in the middle of a cave, right when she’s supposed to do the most she can for the people on her team, that’s her nightmare.

“Yes, you’re right, people get hurt all the time, but...“ he trails off, letting go of her hand to caress aside the stray strands of hair on her forehead, “Not a single one of them have been as important as you.“

One thing to keep in mind about these two - one of the several things they have in common - neither of them have had the time to think of establishing a romantic relationship with anyone in the past couple years. Jason’s been too busy pulling himself and getting his shit together to live up to the US Marine standard while Clarice has been perfecting her skills in the tech field. Never did she see herself using her knowledge to help the Marines but here she is and she can’t argue that it isn’t better than a typical desk job in a noisy office with people doing the exact same thing while her skill set is a lot higher and deserves to be used for something greater.

Well at least now she’s using it for something greater and won’t have to wonder ‘what if...’

Suddenly, a sharp pain cuts her body vertically in half, almost causing her to arch her back so far off the bed, the IV wouldn’t be the only thing causing her problems, seeing as how she’s hooked onto several things, none of them very familiar to Jason. If he had to do something right now, an adjustment necessary to save her life he wouldn’t be able to. But he’d be damned if he wouldn’t at least try.

He too freaks out, jumping to his feet as he watches her struggle, “What do I do?“, He murmurs, fingers shaking, head spinning as he tries to figure out the task he’d have to fulfill to make sure she doesn’t give up on him.

“Relax, Kolchek.“ Clarice sighs, relaxing her back slowly so it’s laying flat on the ‘bed’ again. “It’s a regular occurrence, nothing needs to be done.“ She taps his knee as a sign for him to sit down, “But you know what you can do?“ He nods immediately, “Distract me from the fact that I have only three options right now, two of them not so great. Just talk, about anything else but....all of this.“ She waves her unbound arm around, motioning to the whole cave, the temple, Iraq, all of it.

Jason has never been put in this position before and while he might not know how to handle it exactly, doesn’t mean he won’t try his best. “So you want me telling stories?“ His lips curve into a slight smile when he sees her own, almost childlike excitement to be given a break from this nightmare. “Well, what kind of marine would I be if I didn’t have good stories to tell.”

“I’m all ears, Lieutenant.” She replies, getting comfortable as she wait for him to begin.

He thinks for a moment, racking his brain for the best one, maybe one to even amuse her. “Ah, I got it!” He chuckles, “My first mission. That’s a story I don’t usually tell so it stays between us, copy?” 

“Copy.” Clarice nods with a mischievous glint in her eye, “I take it it’s embarrassing.” She smirks, emphasizing the last word of her statement.

Jason rolls his eyes, “You’d be surprised, but it’s actually not.” He readjusts his cap before starting to tell the story in question, “Ok so that was in my first year. I had dropped the smoking habit but I was still easily the weakest in the division. And the one everyone picked on. I wouldn’t call it bullying cause it was all in good fun and I frequently reciprocated too but it was difficult to keep my confidence up when everyone on my team sounded like and said the same things as that voice in my head that told me I wouldn’t make it. But, that all changed after the first mission I was taken on. The jury’s still out on whether things hanged for better or for worse but what mattered to me is that I gained their respect.” He sighs, practically transporting himself to that day. “A clan of drug lords we’d been tracing for a while took up residence in Uruguay. No one took a second to consider why had they brought themselves so close to us, no on thought it could be a trap. I did and I foolishly kept my mouth shut because my opinion wasn’t worth anything at the time.” He fails to notice how Clarice’s gaze changes, no longer seeing the soldier in him but instead imagining the boy who felt so out of place among the ‘big fish’ but had nowhere else to go. Reminds her a lot of herself when she joined the military as the Colonel’s assistant. Everyone did and still underestimate her because of her lack of expertise in guns and violence. It’s obvious they’d rather have a trained soldier in her place. But she’s learned how to live with it and as surprising as it is, one person with a high opinion of her is more than enough to encourage her further.

“Well, guess who noticed the bomb in the estate.” Jason says, almost as if to show off.

“Merwin?“ She teases, earning herself an eyeroll from the Lieutenant.

“The man was so awed by the mansion itself, las thing he would’ve seen is the bomb.” He laughs and, regardless of her ‘false‘ answer, continues towards the end of the story, “I radioed in a dead body in the side-yard and everyone was quick to rush out of the estate, far enough to not be hurt by the blast that occurred barely a minute later. It threw us a few feet like ragdolls but maybe half of the team wouldn’t have been alive had I not called them to get out.“

“I’m sorry,..” Clarice says as she sits up as much as she can while resting herself on one elbow, “but all the while you were talking about the explosion, I was only worried about the mansion, not you guys.“

Jason gives her a mock glare, causing her giggle before softening his gaze, “I see you have expensive taste, but don’t worry, it wasn’t lost. It got renovated into a fancy restaurant with the best food, wine and music in all of America. Makes sense why it has the biggest dancefloor too, the place was practically built for romantics.”

Clarice is not one to let opportunities slip her by, so she hurries to catch this one too, “Are you a romantic, Lieutenant?” The question very clearly catches him off-guard but she doesn’t give the gears in his head the time to turn, “Cause it sounds like one hell of a good place for a spin.”

A smile, a genuine one lights up his face as he looks at her, sincerity in his gaze, “Good point. And who knows, I might even overlook if you step on my toes.” He says charmingly, taking her hand in his, “But that’s not an invitation to purposely maul my foot.”

“I’m giving you a Marine Oath that I’d never do that.“ She smirks, saluting him with her free hand as the occupied one squeezes his hand right back.

Man, what a day to be a Lieutenant, He thinks to himself, looking at Clarice who, unbeknownst to him, is also thanking her lucky stars for having agreed to accompany Eric on the mission. All atrocities and misfortunes aside, this could potentially be worth it all.

@hopeveon  @artlovingbre  @megandaisy9  @sparrow-gg  @lavadoge  @nyctophiliiiiaaa  @squirreljoe

[masterswrd]

Hannibal Fashion Meta Pt. 3

Like our boy Will, this one took a while to come out and just like him, I’m valid.

So Will’s turn. I don’t what to talk as much about his clothes per say (yet), but more what he does with them. So I’m covering his person suit. Part 4 is going to melt better with the series and be closer to it’s usual comedic tone.

This one isn’t funny like the other ones because I made it to specifically stab people in the chest. I also got a brain so I put this one under a read more so the people who follow us won’t want to murder us.

Apéritif’s costuming gave us everything we need to know about Hannibal and it gave us everything we need to know about Will and I use a few episodes of season 3 to really twist the knife about it.

Will goes through life being deeply uncomfortable with who he is. Through this episode we see Hannibal slipping his person suit on and off while Will’s is slowly being pulled away by himself returning home to Wolf Trap.

Will Graham hates ties. He absolutely hates them. This is borderline canon, not my personal opinion. Ties can feel constricting and bothersome especially if you have sensory issues. As soon as class is dismissed he takes it off and aggressively shoves it in his bag. (He does this again in S1E7 Entree when he goes from class to his meeting with Freddie Lounds).

Alone in his car he takes off his sport coat, rolls ups his sleeves and undoes a few buttons, before taking the shirt off entirely and replacing it with one of his white t-shirts.

Will’s person suit for season one was very much making people think that he was just a loner and harmless and awkward. He doesn’t like to socialize so wants to be unapproachable.But this suit was also a form of armor. The more Will is uncomfortable in a scene, he usually wears glasses and more layers.

There’s plenty of evidence for Will using layers to shut people out. A great example is when Will is taking refuge in Maine during his marriage to Molly, who I can only assume he met on farmersonly dot com (did you know that’s a gay friendly site? neither did Will Graham. I think he might’ve tried talking a guy then went home and threw up and never tried again. Hannibal is kind of like how my sister ate a bad avocado and now insist she’s allergic to them. She isn’t and Will Graham is bisexual). After Jack comes, Will puts on an extra coat. I live in the northern united states and we rarely get a temperature drop so sudden that we need to put on an extra coat, especially with a hot cup of coffee and the sun shining.

Will also slips his person suit off when he doesn’t care what people think. People, being being Bedelia, of course. When he chat’s with her, he takes off his glasses and has open body language. He knows what she is and she knows what he is. No need to hide the fangs and claws when they’re bound to just get into a cat fight anyways. Will is an asshole, anybody who says otherwise is lying to themselves and unless your Molly Foster Graham trying to hold together your crumbling marriage, you have no reason not to accept that.

Person suits aside, Will is not going to wear things that make him uncomfortable unless it serves a specific purpose and love struck Hannibal won’t make him wear a tie to the opera. In their shared mind palace, Will is usually wearing the clothes he has on in real life, safe for the dressy little suit (no tie again take that). But this? That loving gaze? That’s nothing compared to Hannibal’s display of love in Digestivo.

In Thomas Harris’ Novel, Hannibal, our cannibal saves Clarice from Muskrat farms like Hannibal does with Will in the show. I don’t think I need to prove anything about Will being a stand-in for Clarice Starling unless you’re new here. When Clarice wakes up, she’s need stitched up, bullets removes, cleaned, she’s given pain medication that makes her physically weak. Hannibal dresses her in a fine black dressing gown and gives her a pair of heels to wear to eat dinner with him.

In Digestivo, Will is put under very similar circumstances. When he wakes up in his bed he struggled to lift himself and needs to sit up and lean against the wall so that he can look at Hannibal at eye-level. Hannibal dressed Will in his own clothes. A grey undershirt and a soft flannel. Will owns nice clothing befitting a fancy dinner, but this is what he wanted Will to wake up in.

Hannibal gave up trying to manipulate Will along the way is season two and Will never bothered putting up his walls since he knocked them down in season one, before he knew what Hannibal really was. There’s no point. He was already being seen.

After he tells Hannibal goodbye, he puts his armor back on for the rest of the world. Same flannel that Hannibal dressed him in, a sweater, a jacket, and his glasses. Keeping the love that Hannibal has for him kept out of sight from everyone and close to his chest.

Another worthy mention of Will’s layering is in the following episode when he takes Hannibal’s letter out of his dresser. Despite being in front of a roaring fire, Will puts on a sweater, feeling too vulnerable being in his sleepwear. Probably afraid of what would happen if Molly walked in.

When chooses to talk with Hannibal in the red dragon arc, like the entirety of the show, Will never wears his glasses. He makes a show to the viewer of taking them off when he approaches Hannibal’s cell.

Will removes another layer in Wrath of the Lamb, being his jacket. (This one probably doesn’t mean anything, they were inside for at least a few hours.) BUT! I see a lot of people write that Will found clothes that Hannibal bought for him when he thought Will would run away with him. That mirrors Clarice wearing clothes that Hannibal picked for her before running away with him.  I love to see it, but the last clothes we see Will in are canonically his clothes. The one’s he’d been wearing all day. Shirt unbuttoned, untucked, and very apologetically Will Graham. As much as I love reading about Hannibal dressing Will up like a ken doll, he’d never make this man wear a tie for him.

Will might not be consciously doing the things he’s doing when it comes to Hannibal, but he’s doing it. He has no control over how Hannibal makes him feel, but time and time again he will peel over his layers in his presence in a way that he doesn’t do with any other character in the show.

[dccomicrants]

The Spectre

Content Warning: Mentions of homophobia, the aids crisis, parental abuse

Summary: Jim Corrigan was the literal dead man walking of the JSA bound to an entity older than comprehension. A walking good cop bad cop who would judge the souls of others. That's one way to handle problems.

Comic Issues: The Spectre (1992- 1997)

James Brendan Corrigan is the Spectre, an agent of God’s Vengeance or Wrath (you can take your pick). He was the son of the fire and brimstone preacher Jebediah Corrigan, who was so abusive that Jim had the fear of God beaten out of him. He grew up traveling the country with his father, meaning he never really had friends growing up. The one friend he did have ended up dying in a storm because his father was having an affair with Rafe’s mother.

He would eventually go on to be a cop in New York City where he got engaged to Clarice Winston. Jim was a hardass who didn’t show mercy or compassion to anyone breaking the law.

In 1939, he and his fiancé were captured by “Gat” Benson. Benson killed him the way any good mobster would, he put Jim in a barrel filled with cement and then dumped him into the river. He was offered a chance to seek justice, which he took in a heartbeat, binding him to Spectre.

During World War 2, he was a member of the All-Star Squadron, the precursor to the Justice Society of America, and disappeared without a trace after the JSA temporarily disbanded in 1951.

Being dead wouldn’t stop Corrigan from being a detective, he continued his activities with NYPD, focusing more on earthly crimes as there were less cosmical threats for him to deal with after he defeated Azmodus. Jim went through a period of time where he couldn’t remember that he was the Spectre and continued to work as a detective. Eventually he would give up some of his power to Madame Xandu because it was overwhelming.

Jim would end up meeting and working with Detective Nate Kane and Amy Beitermann. Corrigan would find himself falling in love with Amy, only for her to be murdered by the man who she unknowingly infected. She and Corrigan would only be able to end up together through his eventual 'death'.

Jim Corrigan's an interesting character because he acts like a product of his time. What was really interesting was his 1992-1997 run where he does a lot but the big thing that happens is he goes to stop people from killing these two gay men and then when they ask him to do more, they rightfully accuse Jim of homophobia. So he talks to his buddy who at the time was still a catholic priest and the Priest asks him "what would you do if I told you I was gay?" Jim nopes out of there and has to wrestle with his homophobia.

I think it's interesting because out of all of the JSA members, Jim's comics are the only ones that reflect the time period in which Jim was initially created in and the period he was interacting with. Not only that but the whole point of his comics tends to be him wrestling with the problems of the day and the fact that he has to be involved in them.

Jim comes to term with his homophobia by setting it aside and that sets him off on a whole crisis of faith where he gets rightly accused of being self-absorbed because he is. Jim Corrigan quite literally didn’t trust God’s judgement (paraphrased quote) so he teamed up with the spirit of wrath to make sure punishment was dealt to the men who killed him. Then, during a crisis of faith, he wondered if maybe God was just a figment of his imagination.

Anyways, his comic run ends with him planning his own funeral so he could finally find rest, ending his time as the Spectre setting someone else up to be the host.

[xxgothchatonxx]

It’s pretty clear in the book that Clarice could have kept Buffalo Bill alive until the ambulances arrived to rescue him, but she preferred to watch him die. What do you think so? Someone said Clarice also has dark features. She’s not on Will Graham’s level (tv series), but she also has a pretty dark self. What do you think ?

Clarice Starling absolutely has a dark side, but you're right it's not on TV!Will Graham's level. I think (need to emphasise, this is just my interpretation) her 'dark side' is that she doesn't follow the rules. The fact that she was at Buffalo Bill's place at all is proof of that. She was not supposed to be there. She was removed from that case, and she was told to just go home and let the authorities deal with this. But her strong desire, her want, her need to save Catherine Martin and stop Buffalo Bill from continuing his crimes, pushed her towards breaking the rules.

And she had been doing that since she first met Hannibal. She was explicitly told "do not approach the glass' and "you're not to tell him anything about yourself... you don't want Hannibal Lecter inside your head". And she does both things. But that rule breaking helped her solve the case, save the day, and also helped her better herself. Clarice was basically supposed to just be a tool to help the FBI and she ended up being so much more than that. And for people like Paul Krendler, that's a terrifying notion: someone moving away from 'their place'.

But back to the first part of your question. So, I think the part you're talking about is this.

"Starling had to be positive he was dead."

Again, this separates her from the rest of the FBI. Because, granted I'm not exactly an expert, but I'm pretty sure the protocol is to make some attempt to keep the criminal alive, if it's possible. Clarice didn't do that. She had to be positive he was dead. She needed to make sure he could never EVER hurt anyone again. It's not exactly what we'd think of when we think of a traditional hero. "Okay, I've stopped the bad guy, now I'll just pass him off to the authorities-" no, Clarice understands that there's some people who can't and shouldn't have the easy way out. I should also point out that she only shot Bill out of self-defence. 

Speaking of which, let's look at her reaction (in the novel) to Paul Krendler being... well THAT. I've got two interpretations. 1. She is not stupid enough to try and convince Hannibal to not kill him. Taking words from the movie here, she doesn't want to "deny (Hannibal) his life", she doesn't want to change who he is anymore than he wants to change her. 2. She thought Paul Krendler was a morally bankrupt prick who had it coming.

And let's finally talk about what a lot of people think is the darkest part of Clarice's story. When she decided to run off with Hannibal at the end of the eponymous novel. So, we all know that it was her choice, he didn't force her, that conditioning attempt didn't work - she is still Clarice Starling. So, the fact that she has decided to leave the right side people who used her and threw her under the bus and run off with a dangerous psychopath the only man (aside from Barney) who really treated her with any respect... that's terrifying for a lot of people. A woman taking charge of her own life, and especially with it being a sexual ending - "oh no, a woman is being sexually active and it's not cos she's getting assaulted!1!' - is a horrifying concept.

So... in conclusion (if you can follow all of that, bravo, cos I don't think I've said this in a way that makes any damn sense 😂) Clarice Starling's "dark side" is that her perception of what is right and wrong is different from what she is expected to believe. She is still fundamentally a good person, she just goes a step beyond what a lot of us would do, and what she is "supposed" to do.