#as someone who’s considered multiple times if i should stop sharing my writing it’s things like this that keep me going <3< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[the-travelling-witch]

HELLO I just came to say that I'm hooked on your twst writings LMAO YOU ARE VERY TALENTED never stop writing, you really have talent! thank you very much for publishing your writings and have a nice day <3

omg hi, thank you so much!! reading this made me literally so happy!! i don’t think it’s a secret but i doubt myself a lot, so hearing this means so much 🥺💕

in return for your super kind words, have a little snippet of the twst fic that’s currently occupying my brain and my drafts (hopefully this is also motivation for me to finish it ^^;)

ace is just so best friend coded, the urge to tease him is too strong

[yujinnieswifeu]

Birthday Party~

a/n: this is the official longest story i have written, i’m so sorry it took me 2 whole ass days to write this 😫, and Yujin’s birthday has passed waaa, please forgive me i’m rlly still a Yujin’s enthusiast😣, anyws enjoy this really wholesome one💕

pairings: fem!reader x birthday!girl Yujin🐶

warnings: smut, tribbing (pussy on pussy), thats about it, just really soft sex uwu

———————————————————————

It was the day of Yujin’s birthday, and you were preparing to go for the party she invited you and some other close friends of hers. You were deciding which dress to wear, not wanting to look too over since the attention should be on Yujin, but not too under too. After a long while, you decided to go with a cute pastel blue dress that showed off your shoulder blades. You quickly gathered your things, rushing out of the house to her place, not forgetting to take her present of course.

。。。

When reaching her place, you rang the doorbell, and after a few seconds, Yujin opens the door for you. Her face lit up at the sight of you, the whole day, she felt as if someone was missing, her mood was a little gloomy other than the fact that you wished her happy birthday when the clock strike 12 and when you told her you were on the way to her place. “Y/n…you’re here, finally.” She pouts, you giggle slightly, finding her pout cute, almost puppy like and pinched her cheek. “Were you all sad because i’m not here?” You tease, and her heart race. It was times like this that she wondered if she was being obvious with her feelings towards you, or that you were just oblivious to it all. Either way, she needs to set that aside if not she would confess everything out and embarrass herself. “You’re my bestie, of course i would be sad.” Your heart clenches at the title she refers you too, forcing a smile instead before stepping inside her apartment.

“Happy birthday Yujinnie~” you ignored her words instead, passing her the gift that you got for her, watching how her face lit up again, the previous convo long forgotten as she looks inside but you were quick cover the top of the bag. “Uh uh, only later remember?” She groans, a pout forming on her face again which you chuckle at. “Come on silly, let’s put that with the other presents.” You hold her hand, feeling how she wraps her fingers over yours, it makes you squeal inside, your heart racing, and you hope your palm was not sweaty. As you walked into the shared space, multiple faces greets you, seeing the usual clique, Wonyoung, Rei, Leeseo, Gaeul and Liz already conversing with one another. When they see you two walk in, they say their hi’s, letting you put down your things first and the present you got for Yujin.

“Y/n unnie! Yujin couldn’t stop asking where you were!” Leeseo came rushing to your side, and you raise a brow at her and Yujin. “Did she? I guessed someone really missed me that much huh?” You smirk, teasing Yujin further as she rolls her eyes, her cheeks were turning red and she excuses herself to the kitchen instead. You and Leeseo chuckle at her reaction, before going to the others. “Ahh, this outfit looks so good on you Y/n!” Wonyoung squeals, she just realised you came in, and she goes to hug you. You thanked her, telling her that her outfit was nice too before pulling away. You two started catching up, since it has been awhile since you have seen Wonyoung.

Yujin was watching from the sides as she makes you a drink, it was always the usual, Iced matcha, according to you, it was the best drink you ever drank. Reminiscing at the thought, she smiles to herself, as she mixes the powder with the milk. “Why you smiling all giddily Yuj?” It was Rei who walks in, she already knew that there was something up with you and Yujin, either of you wanting to admit it. Rei was also considered Yujin’s second closest friend, since she knew about her big fat crush on you. “I-i’m not!” Yujin quickly defends herself, and Rei just smirks. “Lier, you probably thought about her again.” She says rather loudly, and Yujin immediately shushes her up, giving her a glare.

“You know, you should really try to make a move, i really think Y/n likes you as well.” Rei comes closer this time to say, and Yujin could feel her heart pounding in her chest, should she really give it a try? But what if you didn’t like her back? Won’t that change everything? “I…i can’t. I’m scared.” Yujin says quietly, as she continues to stir the matcha drink, the colour turning green. “Trust me, i can see the look she gives you Yujin, it’s different.” Rei pats Yujin’s shoulder, before going back to the shared space. Yujin sighs, the thought lingering in her mind before she hears her name being called.

。。。

It was now almost 6 and you were all seated at the table eating dinner together, passing each other food since the table was rather long. You had sat next to Yujin, and she took some tteokbokki with her chopsticks onto your plate. You hummed a thank you, cheeks stuffed with food. She chuckles, finding how your cheeks looked cute in that moment, and places her hand on your kneecap. It makes your heart race again, trying to focus on the food instead of her hand there. Sure, it was normal between you two, but whenever it happens, you just couldn’t help but think if it was really normal, do best friends touch each other this way?

“Oh, you have some sauce on your cheek.” She says, going to take a tissue from the tissue box in the middle of the table before helping you wipe it off. “Stay still.” You were frozen at this point, breath hitching as she was close to your face, wiping away the sauce on your cheeks. You could hear giggling as well, it was at that moment that you realised everyone else was staring, and your cheeks turn red. “W-what?” You swallow your food to say, and Wonyoung moves both her brow up and down teasingly.

You swear you wanted to throw something their way at this point, but kept it to yourself as you all continue to eat at the table. At times when Yujin would put her hand at your thighs, you would play with her fingers, chewing the food in your mouth. Other times, you would take her hand in yours to play with them, and it makes Yujin go all mushy inside, feeling the butterflies in her tummy. You just looked so cute when playing with her fingers, and it just felt so nice to feel your fingers over hers. “I need to go the restroom for a while.” You suddenly excused yourself, undoing your hand with hers before standing up. “Don’t take too long.” Yujin says, she was pouting on the inside and you just squish her cheeks. “Yes birthday girl.” You tease, and the others laugh when they saw how it affected Yujin. You looked to your other friends, signalling them you were going to take the cake in and Wonyoung winks in the process.

Yujin saw this, and she could feel her heart aching, why did Wonyoung just winked to you? Was she trying to flirt with you? Did you like it? So many thoughts were in her head, and that was when you started singing happy birthday then did she snap out of her thoughts, her face lighting up at the sight of her favourite cake. It was a strawberry cake, the words on the cake were ‘Happy birthday Yujin!’ with a puppy face next to it. She almost teared at the sight, suddenly feeling so lucky to have friends to celebrate her birthday with her. “You guys didn’t have to!”

“Oh shut up.” Rei exclaims and the room erupts with laughter. You all crowded around Yujin as she makes a wish, your heart was fluttering at the sight of the short haired girl making her wish, she just looks so peaceful. So cute…so puppy like…you wanted to just hide in a corner and kick your legs. When she opened her eyes, she catches your stare and smiles at you, and you could have sworn you were beet red by now. She proceeds to blow the candles out, and everyone erupts in cheers. “Let’s play truth or dare after this girlies!” Wonyoung squeals out, which everyone cheers to even louder.

。。。

“Truth or dare!” Gaeul asks Liz and Liz replies with a dare. “I dare you to call someone from work and tell them that you are interested in them.” Liz was groaning at the dare, everyone else was chuckling, not expecting her to go with it but she swiped out her phone. “Oh my god. This is going to be insane!” Wonyoung covers her mouth with her hand when Liz rings up her manager, placing the call on speaker. After what felt like a minute when it has only been seconds, there was a click, and Liz was regretting her decision immediately.

“Hello?” It was a female voice, and everyone stayed silent. “H-hi Sajang-nim, i need to tell you something.” Liz was struggling to get her words out, her face red as she was glaring at Gaeul for asking her this question. Gaeul just shrugs her shoulders, smirking deviously back and Liz rolls her eyes. “Sure, what is it Liz?” “I…i uh..i like you Sajang-nim.” Liz was now biting down on her lips nervously, the tension in the air palpable as silence took over. “Are you drunk?” Everyone was trying not to laugh, you grabbed Yujin’s hand, feeling nervous for Liz as you watch the scene unfolding. The Yujin who was once focusing now only looks to you, you hadn’t notice her staring, too immersed into Liz and the phone call conversation to notice as you played with Yujin’s fingers nervously.

“Maybe we can talk about this tomorrow, but don’t overthink it yeah?” Liz looked as if she was going to burst, her hands were fidgeting at this point. “Yeah, then..u-uh..see you tomorrow.” With that, the call ends with a click and everyone was in disbelief. “She likes you too?” Now it was Wonyoung who exclaims and Liz just groans, having had a big time crush on her manager. “I don’t know! I think i’m going to stop here guys.” Liz says, standing up and you all did not stop her, agreeing she needed some time alone to think. Leeseo stands up too, stretching herself as she gathers her things. “You too?” “I have a class tomorrow sadly, so yeah.” Leeseo answers, saying bye to the rest before she and Liz leaves. The room was now left with Wonyoung, Gaeul, Rei, you and Yujin.

“Okay, truth or dare.” Rei asks you, and you pretended to think, before replying with a truth. “Is someone you like here in this room?” Rei smirks, and suddenly you felt nervous. You were still holding Yujin’s hand in yours, not realising it until now as you untwine her fingers to go for the drink, feeling the burning sensation down your throat instead. The others just groans, wanting to know as well. But this only makes Yujin think, if they weren’t in this room, didn’t it mean that you would have said so? Doesn’t this mean that it could be someone in this room?

She was brought out of thoughts when it was Wonyoung’s turn to ask, the question directing to Yujin this time. “Truth or dare?” “Dare.” Yujin says without any hesitation, and you saw how the 3 were suddenly discussing without you. “Hey! How about me?” You pout, wanting to be in on this, and Yujin giggles. “They don’t want you anymore.” You gave her a small punch on her shoulder, watching as she fake a wince, pouting cutely at you. The three were giving each other looks, a smirk appearing on Wonyoung face. “Yujin, i dare you to kiss someone in this room.” Yujin could feel herself tense at the question, her mind was thinking if she should just go for the drink or just go to kiss you.

When her eyes locked on yours, something in you just flipped, maybe it was the alcohol in your system, but you were unable to tear yourself away as you watch her scoot closer to you. Yujin brings her hand up over your cheek as she brushes the soft skin, your heart was racing at this point as her face inches closer to yours. The room suddenly felt like there were only you two as you stare deeply into her eyes, your eyes travels down to the outline of her lips, staring at how kissable they looked and back up, you watch how Yujin’s eyes got slightly darker than usual, and before you know it, you felt soft lips on yours.

She strokes your cheeks comfortingly as she kisses you softly, you almost wanted to moan if not for the other three in the room, your hands sliding into her hair to bring her closer to you. It starts to get hard to breath, but neither of you wanted the kissing to stop, it was only when you hear someone faking a cough that Yujin quickly pulls away, you bit your bottom lip, suddenly finding your lap to be the most interesting thing in the room. Rei was giving Yujin a look, one that said to go for it. And Yujin would be dumb if she did not, at this point, she wanted you and she had a feeling you felt the same way with how you looked at her.

“That was…awkward.” Wonyoung mutters, and Gaeul can’t stop the laugh that comes out of her mouth. You and Yujin glared at her, which she only bites her bottom lip. “Well, i think, we three need to leave, what do you think?” Gaeul looks to the other two, and they both nodded in agreement. Whispers could be heard as they got their things, quickly getting out of Yujin’s apartment. “Text me tomorrow on how it went!” Rei shouts to Yujin before you could hear the door shut close, Yujin’s face was red at this point, not expecting Rei to say something like that.

“What was that?” You finally broke the silence, and Yujin bit her bottom lip nervously. “She’s just being irritating.” It was quiet again, the air was thick with tension before you suddenly started laughing. Yujin was looking at you weirdly, not understanding how all this was funny. “I-i’m sorry…it’s just…why are things so hard now.” You sigh instead, fingers brushing your hair back. “Can i ask you something?” Yujin’s question catches you off guard, her tone serious as she locks her eyes with yours. You were playing with your fingers again, feeling nervous at what she was going to ask.

“Did you…like the kiss?” Her eyes drops down your lips for a good second, before staring right back into your eyes, and you knew you had to feel those lips on yours again. You wasted no time this time, pushing her down onto the floor as you press your lips onto her soft and plump ones, hearing her groan softly into the kiss, her hands behind your back as it travels down to your waist, gripping your hips. You moan softly into the kiss as you grind your front against hers, feeling her lips part as you shove your tongue past her lips, feeling her tongue against yours which makes you throb.

You pull away, your head against her shoulders this time as you catch your breath, you could feel her hand that was on your hips now sliding up your back into your hair as you let out a whimper. “You have no idea..how much i have been waiting for this.” She completes her sentence after a pause, your heart was beating like crazy, and you were sure she could feel it against her own front, she just drove you this crazy. “Me too..every time i see you, all i want to do is to just call you mine, when i saw others touching you, like the other day, it makes me sad, i-i..i really like you Yujin.” You finally confess, your hands at the sides of her face trapping her, your face inches away from hers again as you spilled your heart out.

“Kiss me again.” She mutters, and you did just that. This time it was filled with electricity, she kissed you like she was going to devour you, and you the same. She had her hands sliding down your back to your ass, squeezing your asscheeks in her palms which has you gasping, pulling away to stare down at her, your hair messy as your eyes clouded with lust. To Yujin, you looked perfect like this. “I want you.” Her voice was laced with need, her eyes puppy like, begging you to say it back to her, and how could you refuse given those puppy eyes. “Fuck, come on.” You stood up, holding out a hand for her which she takes, and she pulls you to her room, pushing you down on the bed as a squeal escapes your lips.

“C-can i really?” She was acting all cute and puppy like, her eyes shining so brightly like she just won an award, it was making you melt all inside. Instead, you part your thighs tempting her, watching how her walls of self-control was slowly crumbling down, before she settles between your legs, her hand pausing at the back of your zip. “Can i remove this?” She asks, which makes you want to squeal from how cute she was being, nodding your head as you smile shyly. She quickly unzips your dress, undressing you and your hands make its way to Yujin’s dress as well. She attaches her lips to yours again, as you both clumsily undress each other.

She pulls away, her eyes was dark with lust as she stares down your body, it suddenly has you feeling vulnerable, until her hands were cupping your breasts, her head dropping down to catch one of them between her lips, rolling her tongue over the hardened bud and sucking on it. “A-ahh Yujin..y-yes ohhh.” Your eyes roll as she teases her way down, pulling moans and whimpers from you, the sound music to her ears. When she nears your core, she teases you, her tongue striping along your inner thigh, you thighs wanting to close but she spreads them apart instead. She watches how you squirm for her, her eyes landing on your wetness, and she almost moans herself from how wet you were for her.

“P-please..Yujin, want it please.” You begged, and she wished she could tease you longer, but she really wanted to taste you, her tongue sticks out to take a long stripe of your wetness, moaning at how you taste as she eats you out like a starved person. Your hips were moving with her tongue, your hands fondling your own breasts as you watch her eat you out, the scene was making you even more wetter, her eyes locking on yours as she moans against your folds, the vibrations running through your whole body and you were close. Hips buckling against her, Yujin holds you in place, spreading your thighs wider for her as she licks even faster, she has one hand down to your entrance, entering two fingers inside of you as you moan loudly at the stretch.

She groans at how tight you were around her fingers, moving them the same speed as her tongue that was flicking over your bundle of nerves. “F-fuck Yujin i’m going to cum!” You cry out, body shuddering as waves of pleasure washes over you, your thighs closing around her head, trapping her between your legs as she helps you through your high.

When your body relaxes, she spreads your thighs again, her body hovers over yours as she places the fingers that was now coated with your juices into your mouth, watching how you eagerly clean her fingers, the sight makes her breathing heavy, as she starts to grind her wetness over yours. You moan softly around her digits, eyes closing as you focus on the pleasure. You could feel her speeding up her movements, pulling her fingers away from your mouth to replace with her own lips, feeling how her hardened nipples brushes against yours which adds to the pleasure.

Yujin moans against your lips, her hand sliding into your hair as she pulls at your scalp, hearing you whimper for her. She pulls away, her hungry eyes looking down at your fucked out state, moving her hips faster as your clit bumps repeatedly against hers, she moans loudly, her high reaching and so was yours as your legs wrap around her, your hands finding her breasts as you fondle with them, eyes locked onto hers as you both admired how each other looked in that moment.

“I..i’m so close Y/n, come with me.” She struggles out, her forehead goes to connect yours as your breaths mingled. “F-fuck yes, don’t stop please!” You let out, feeling her hips moving even faster as she chases her own orgasm. “O-oh fuck, y-yes let go for me baby.” Her voice was desperate, watching how your eyes roll to the back, lips parting as you cum underneath her, it makes her let go as well, cumming together with you. Yujin’s body spasms a little, and she rides out you two’s shared orgasm, you could feel her wetness gushing out against yours, sliding down to the area between your asscheeks and against her sheets.

When she pulls herself away from you and roll to lie her back against her bed, you giggle at her, the other Yujin was back, and you scoot your body into hers, feeling her arms wrap around you in a protective manner, spooning you. “Does this mean…we’re official now?” She breaks the silence, and you lock your forehead with hers, breath fanning against hers. “Well…can you be my girlfriend?” You saw how she pouted , instead pushing your back into the mattress as her figure hovers yours.

“I wanted for me to ask you that, not you.” You giggle, rolling your eyes as you wait for her to ask you the question. “Can you be mine? My girlfriend, my person to wake up to every morning? Maybe hm, to make me pancakes.” You swore you wanted to push her off and punch her, but she was being so cute about this. “Yes, i can, minus the pancake part, you know i can’t cook.” She groans, her head against your neck instead as she whiffs a scent of you, pulling away again. “Regardless, i’ll teach you how to cook.” She smiles widely, her pearly whites showing and you place a kiss on her nose. “I’ll love that.”

[cipheress-to-k-pop]

the little princess (g.l.)

Pairing: Garfield Logan x Tamaranean!Fem!Reader

Warnings: None i think

Word Count: 3.1k

Summary: If the Titans had a nickel for every time one of Kori's sister's, that she apparently had a very bad relationship with, landed on Earth, they'd have two nickels. Which isn't much but it's weird that it happened twice.

A/N: This is just a little ode to the Starfire that was in the OG Teen Titans show because I just love her so much. She's just a little cutie patootie and I loved all of her quirks and antics. I wanted to make the oneshot a little longer and end with both Gar and her getting together but I realized that it would've been far too long and I didn't want to write all that in the same one-shot.

It was in Dick's poor judgment to listen to the police radio while they were taking the cross-country road trip while getting back to San Francisco. Well, if we're debating Dick's poor judgment, he really should have taken the jet but not like the team could do anything about it now.

They were in Nevada, near Las Vegas when the chatter on the radio went wild. He spared a glance at Starfire, wondering if they should respond but she shook her head. So far, all alerts on the police radio had been insignificant things like disruption of business or public intoxication. Nothing that required their intervention.

So, Dick didn't bother to turn his indicator on for the exit from the highway. That was until they heard something cut through the static, clear as day, "Attention all units, need immediate backup! There's some sort of human flame thrower here! Like that superhero chick!"

They shared a glance and Dick swerved off the road and into the exit, nearly hitting another car in his hurry.

It took longer than it should have to get there, considering Starfire was driving while Dick changed into his Nightwing suit in the bathroom. To say that LVMPD were surprised when an RV rolled up with five superheroes inside was an understatement.

They directed them to the building, the perimeter heavily guarded by multiple officers, all armed.

Once they entered the building, everyone froze, noting how the girl on fire in the middle of the room looked much like the one standing beside them. Her hair was glowing and floating along with her body as she clenched her molten fists.

This never would have happened if they just took the jet.

Before any of them could even come up with a game plan, their target noticed just who was standing there and stopped. When the flames and the nearly blinding glow had subsided, they noticed all that was remaining was a young girl.

"Kori?" She asked curiously, wondering if that was really Starfire or just someone who looked exactly like her. After all, it was a new planet, she didn't know much about the inhabitants here.

"(Y/N)?" Kori breathed out, equal parts shocked and relieved.

The girl's face crumpled, and she broke out into sobs before flying right into her arms, "Kori!"

It was kind of amusing to see Kori attempt to hug you back, considering that you were floating off the ground but once you were consoled, she let you go, and you remained floating a couple feet off the floor at her side.

Kori gestured to the rest of them, and you bashfully hid behind her, scared of the newcomers. Ever since you landed on this planet, they had been nothing but cruel to you. All you had done was use your powers to reheat the tea you were served and suddenly there were men who had pointed weapons at you.

You looked at Nightwing's escrima sticks apprehensively before tucking yourself further behind her back. She spared you a glance before turning to her teammates with a tolerating smile.

"Guys, meet my sister."

"Another sister? Is she gonna try and kill us too?"

"You know Komander?" You asked curiously, floating a bit higher so that your head peeked over Kori's.

"Vaguely." Conner answered and you tilted your head, watching him with a deliberating pout. He seemed a little uncomfortable by your piercing stare, so you averted your gaze before whispering in your sister's ear.

"Are they holding you hostage?"

She chuckled and shook her head before introducing all of them to you by name. You listened attentively, noticing how neither of them bothered to give you smiles aside from the youngest girl and boy named Rachel and Gar.

They had pretty hair. You liked them already.

***

"Another sister you didn't tell us about?" Dick pressed, leaning over the centre console and Kori sighed, running a hand down her face. You were floating in the back of the RV, listening intently to Tim's conspiracies about aliens and attempting to explain your history and more to him.

"I didn't think I had to. I never thought we'd actually have to run into her." She explained and he gave her a hard gaze.

"Yes, but a little heads up would have been nice."

"Well, I didn't know she was going to be here, now did I?!" She snapped and the RV was immediately silenced. She sighed and turned to give the rest of you a reassuring smile and you reluctantly went back to your conversations.

When she was sure they weren't listening, she turned back to Dick, "She's the youngest. After Komander was born without powers, the public and nobles pressed for my parents to have another child. She was born with powers and also the first one in like 5 generations to be born with the power of flight. She's considered a gem in the public eye. She can do no wrong. And she's too young to assume the throne so she's never pressured like Komander, and I were. I'm surprised they even let her off the planet."

Dick cast an uncertain eye on the woman beside him. It was obvious that she had some unresolved issues with you, although he couldn't exactly put his finger on why. From what he gathered, you were pretty delightful and made a cute first impression, unlike the time he met Jason.

"What's this?" You asked loudly, pointing to a hole in their table.

"Um, it's a sink." Gar answered, flustered that you didn't know about its existence, "It's where we wash our hands and dishes and things."

Your face scrunched up, "Well that sounds unhygienic. Can't you just acquire new ones?"

Kori rolled her eyes.

"What are you doing here, (Y/N)?" She asked, finally acknowledging you now that she had wrapped her head around it.

Your brows furrowed at her tone as you flew closer to her, "Maybe I'm assuming but are you perhaps angry with me?"

She scoffed. Of course, you didn't even know when you upset someone. People back home usually jump through hoops for you, so it was no wonder that you had absolutely no idea of other people's feelings or thought that you could do any wrong.

"Yes! What the hell are you doing here?! You can't just come to a planet like Earth and then go around causing trouble!"

"Excuse me?" You asked cautiously, trying to reason with her. You had come here to find your older sister because you thought she would know what to do. The more you spoke with her, the less she seemed like the rightful ruler and more like Komander, "What was I meant to do, Kori'Ander? Our parents were murdered, the crown princess disappeared. People began looking toward me for an answer. What was I meant to tell them?"

She scoffed once again and you were starting to get very irritated by the sound, "Of course, couldn't even run a kingdom for a while."

This struck the wrong chord. You were never quite close with your older sisters; they both considered you the runt of the family and frequently made comments about how you were too young to join them on their excursions. Kori would seem like the doting older sister to the public, but you never really connected.

And Komander hated you since birth.

It was undeniable that your parents treasured you. I mean, how could they not when you constantly strived for their attention. You didn't have any friends growing up and your sisters scorned you when you did nothing wrong, so you depended on your parents for intimacy and connection.

It wasn't rare for you to be floating around the throne room, giggling when your father teased you by attempting to catch you, even though you were way out of his reach.

The people treasured you as well, you realized that very early, when you were first introduced to them as a young girl. You had been hiding behind your mother's gown, intimidated by the sheer amount of people and held her skirt in a tight fist.

You remember your parents cooing at you as they slowly revealed you to the rest of them and then the deafening sound of the crowd cheering. Your parents watched with pride as you began flying to try and see just how many people were there and they cheered louder.

You were adored.

And even though you did want to spend time with your sisters and play with them, you were eventually steered away from them by your parents after you had returned to their room in tears and inconsolable when your sisters had slammed their door in your face when you had just asked to play.

"I'm not the one meant to be running the kingdom, Kori. You are the crown princess. It was your duty to be take over the throne or officially abdicate it. Not mine." You explained, not quite understanding why she was being so negative. This had been her birth right and her path, way before you were even born.

You didn't realize it when you were younger but as you came of age, you understood that your role in the royal family wasn't one of politics or even running the kingdom. You were nothing more than a symbol to the people. Of purity, peace, and hope.

That had been made clear, so why was she suddenly expecting you to take over?

Everyone stared out the window, trying extremely hard to blend into the surroundings. While all of them respected Kori a lot, they all knew that she was impulsive and often said things without thinking them through. While Kori was excellent at giving advice, she herself was awful at controlling her emotions and lashed out often.

Tim began making prayers that they would make it through without something catching on fire.

"I realize that (Y/N)! But you're still the princess in our absence! You should have done something instead of running away and make someone solve your problems for you!"

You gasped, "My problems?! The kingdom that you're the ruler of is my problem? I'm the one who's running away? You're the one who ran so far that you went to a completely different planet! You—You zarbnarf!"

Kori froze, watching as your eyes glassed over with furious tears. Immediately, she regretted speaking to you that way, feeling panic build in her system. It was probably because growing up, she had learnt to grow terrified whenever you began crying around her.

Because you were the golden child. The fragile flower among molten rocks and you were treasured by your parents beyond anything. If either Kori or Komander had made you cry, they usually faced a punishment. That was something that you took advantage of, as an immature, mischievous child. When had you grown up so much?

She wanted to apologize, take it back but her pride was swelling so big in her chest that it clogged her throat. She was still angry and humiliated and all the things she felt as a child began coming back to her.

How could she be so immature? She had no idea what happened on Tamaran, and she had been foolish to think it was still the place she considered home. But it was inevitable for the people to ask about their ruler. She had been running away from the thought for too long.

She had completely forgotten that you were left behind in the chaos.

"You abandoned our family! Our people! And for what? A servant’s quarters on wheels?" You spat, turning away from her. She expected you to throw open the door and fly out but instead you stomped over to the seat beside Gar, not noticing the way he began scrambling to wiggly himself out of the booth and away from you.

He was too slow, and you ended up plopping down onto the seat beside him and he stared apprehensively at you from the corner of his eye.

Kori scoffed, "Why don't you just leave?!"

You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms, "I'm done with this conversation but not with you. If your first response to confrontation is to run away, then I can see why you weren't gifted with the power of flight in the first place."

She swelled, puffing out her chest, "You know what—?!"

When Kori realized that you weren't in the mood to talk anymore, she returned to her seat even though she wanted to keep yelling at you. Why did you get to decide when the argument was over? You both weren't on Tamaran anymore and your parents weren't around anymore to scold her for picking a fight with someone so much younger but still, she fumed silently in her seat.

You turned to Gar with an apologetic pout, "I apologize for calling this a servant's quarters. You have a lovely home."

He chuckled at your guilty face, "Yeah, this isn't where we live, we're just using it to get back home."

You gave him a smile, "So you're not feeling hard with me?"

He blushed furiously, ignoring Conner as he laughed quietly into his hand, "Yeah, no hard feelings here."

***

Since you were an "unwelcome" guest in Kori's eyes, you were confined to the couch when you reached the tower. She was expecting you to throw a fit or whine about having to sleep like a servant, but you didn't mind, didn't complain, didn't say anything as you sat silently on the couch.

They didn't know what caused the sudden damp in your mood, you had been smiling the entire trip back, asking questions and making conversation but it was like everything vanished the second you entered their home.

Gar came out of his room in the middle of the night for a snack when he saw you sitting up on the couch, knees pulled to your chest. He thought he would just grab whatever he needed and leave quickly but he heard you sniffle.

"You okay?"

You looked up at him startled, and quickly wiped away your tears before plastering a fake smile on your face, "I am fine. Thank you for asking."

He should have just nodded, giving you an awkward smile before retreating back to his bedroom but he seemed unable to get the apathetic words out at the site of you hiding your faltering smile behind your pink hair.

Superman had kryptonite. He had pretty girls.

"Would you like some ice cream?"

Your brows furrowed in confusion, "Iced screams? What is that?"

He chuckled, finding the way your nose scrunched up absolutely adorable, "Not 'iced screams'. Ice cream."

"Like cold milk?"

"Cold, sweet, hard milk."

You looked mildly repulsed, "I shall decline. Thank you for the offer."

He just breathed out a laugh, sitting next to you with a bowl of cookie dough and two spoons, "Just try it."

You kept giving him cautious glances all while lifting the spoon of the sugary treat to your mouth, watching as he nodded encouragingly and tentatively took a tiny taste (wow alliteration).

Gar had the absolute pleasure of watching your face scrunch up immediately, not expecting it to be that cold but it slowly faded into a small smile at the flavour.

When you had taken another spoon, he glanced at you and noticed your swollen eyes and red nose, "Is everything okay?"

You gave him a small smile and nodded, "I am merely just sick of your home."

He froze in disbelief before reminding himself that you were a literal princess. You were probably very used to luxury and had a literal castle to yourself.

And you're Komander's sister. That part explains a lot.

He shook the thoughts from his head before smiling politely and taking a spoon of ice cream himself when he didn't know how to respond. Luckily, he didn't have to because you continued.

"I know I have been here only a short time, but I miss Tamaran deeply."

The tension in his spine melted away and he slouched with a sigh of relief, "Oh, you're homesick."

You gave him a refined smile, "Yes, I just mentioned about the home-sickness."

"It's not exactly--nevermind."

There was a moment of silence while you quietly ate a couple more spoonfuls of ice cream before Gar spoke again, "No offense but if you miss it so much, why don't you just go back?"

You bit your lip, "My planet is in political instability. I'm unfit to take the throne. So, I vowed to bring the true heir back home."

His brows furrowed, "Why are you unfit to take the throne? You seem smart and powerful."

His compliment had heat raising to your cheeks and you felt a small smile grow on your face before it was dampened by the heavy topic and you sighed, resting your head against the back of the couch.

"My people wish that I take the throne because they see me as a beacon of hope but that is the very reason I am unable. My gift of flight has made me different from the rest of the Tamaraneans, so in a political sense, I have become a figurehead for nobility, equality and neutrality."

He nodded even though he wasn't quite understanding where this was headed.

"Because of this I have been trusted to be a mediator between my planet and others. I am but a symbol of peace. The rulers of other planets trust me because I am not part of the political party on Tamaran. I have never even made my debut into noble society. If I take my place as the ruler, those alliances could fall apart. The common people couldn't possibly understand that."

"So, you're supposed to be this unbiased figurehead but if you acquire any actual power, you think your alliances with other planets will fall apart?" He summarized, wanting to make sure that he actually understood, and you nodded.

"Well, why don't you just tell Kori that? I'm sure she'd understand."

Your eyes drifted to your feet that were folded up onto the sofa, "I was going to, but I lost my temper when she accused me of not taking initiative. She never acknowledged the work I did for my people. I suppose I got defensive."

He placed a gentle hand on your shoulder, giving you a comforting squeeze, "It's alright. Second time's the charm."

Your face scrunched up in confusion and he laughed quietly, "I mean, you should try again tomorrow. Maybe it'll go better this time."

"Ah."

"Hey (Y/N)?"

"Yes, Garfield?"

He offered you a small smile, "If it makes any difference, I really do believe that you did the right thing."

You felt the corners of your mouth tug up, "Thank you, Garfield."

***

Forever Taglist:

@simonsbluee

@haniscrying

@superheroesaremyjam113263

@writers-whirlwind

DC Taglist:

@emmacata

@p--e--a--c--h--e--s

@sometimeseverythingsucks

@sokkas-honour

@unstable1902

@lostgirlheart

@missdisapear

@tadpole-san

@isawachickeninatree

@uxavity

@battlenix

@capricorn-stark

@evermoore580

@dumbbitchgalore

@fuckingjinkies

@some-lovely-day

[sophieinwonderland]

The Plurality of... Bill Cipher (The Book of Bill)

Spoiler Warning for Gravity Falls, The Book of Bill, and the nature of reality as you know it

Hello dear reader.

I recently found in my possession a strange book with no explanation as to how it got there. A bizarre tome known only as The Book of Bill.

I recognized the name and imagery from someone else's memories. Bill Cipher, a character from Alex Hirsch's hit series Gravity Falls.

It honestly seemed too perfect. I've been doing this "Plurality of..." series where I look at plurality in media. And an important part of Bill's shtick was possession.

It seemed simple enough. I can read the book, learn a bit about Bill and his possession, and then write an article about his plurality. But the reality was anything by simple, with far more than I bargained for.

And by the end of this post, this book will have driven me to break a fundamental rule I've held sacred through my "Plurality Of..." series.

What is Plurality?

Before we begin, I should explain what plurality is for anyone new here. Plurality is a term for being multiple in one body in some way.

We call the body's occupants "headmates". These can be anything from alters in dissociative disorders to spirit guides bound to a mortal, to... yes... even literal demonic possession.

Yeah, even being possessed by a demonic triangle from a 2-dimensional universe is a type of plurality. If there are multiple self-conscious agents of some kind there, it's plural!

Time To Get Weird!

(Art by magentasnail)

Let's catch you up on the basics real quick. Again, there will be huge Gravity Falls spoilers.

In Gravity Falls, Bill Cipher is a yellow a 2-dimensional triangle demon bent on causing chaos.

Through the series, Bill makes deals with multiple characters to possess their bodies. This includes both gaining full control over the body of protagonist Dipper Pines for an episode, and more interestingly, sharing control over the body of Stanford Pines for an extended period of time.

Bill's possession of Dipper left Dipper outside his body like a ghost. But his deal with Stanford is much more plural in nature, where they shared control, with Bill only controlling the body in his sleep.

Obviously real plural systems don't have headmates controlling their body while they sleep like this, but the experience can be seen as analogous to dissociative identity disorder, where it's common to experience blackouts and "wake up" in situations unsure how you got there.

That's all you really need to know about Bill for the time being.

With that out of the way, it's time get weird and dive straight into the Book of Bill!

The Book of Bills

As I begin reading the Book of Bill, I'm given a warning from Stanford Pines that the book will rewrite itself based on the mind of the reader. This seems silly, and I of course dismiss the idea out of hand. Surely there's no way a book could change itself based on who's reading it.

As I venture further into this tome, I find the occasional point of interest. References to Bill living in people's brain, him being an idea, etc.

I stop briefly to ponder that. Why does Bill refer to himself as an idea? Isn't he canonically a being from a physical 2-dimensional world? Him being described as an idea is peculiar, but something I tuck away for the future.

The first thing I find that really piques my interest in regards to plurality is the multiple times that it's just referenced that there are multiple Bills in Bill's head. Such as when Bill refers to "the voices in his head" teaming up.

In the plural community, there's a concept known as median system.

A median system is typically a system which has separate parts that are less distinct from each other. There's a pretty solid case that Bill, having a bunch of Bills in his head, could be considered a median system on his own.

In fact, the book itself actually depicts communication between multiple Bills, in the form of an interview.

And throughout the interview, there are times where the Prime Bill seemingly gets annoyed at the interviewer's questions. As if they are actually different people. While this could be Bill simply duplicating himself and pretending for comedic effect, it could just as easily be that both Bills are headmates in Bill's system.

Bill being a median system is a pretty interesting direction.

As I read on though, the book dragged me down yet another rabbit hole, and raised an important question.

Does Bill Have A Dissociative Disorder???

Let's talk about dissociative identity disorder. There are two main criteria for DID. Criterion A is the presence of two or more distinct personality states. You know, like those Bills in Bill's head.

The second is memory loss.

Recurrent gaps in the recall of everyday events, important personal information, and/or traumatic events.

This is what was on my mind when Bill was describing how he was uniquely gifted with the ability to see into the third dimension, and wanted to teach others this same skill.

But when he tries to recount it... this happened...

To me, this sounds exactly what was described in criterion B. This is also called dissociative amnesia.

And it's not just this one-off example. Bill actually references later that he dissociates (his words) and "wakes up" later after a conquest.

With everything we know, it seems incredibly likely that Bill has DID, or at least a related disorder.

Bill is what he eats

Okay... wait...

So Bill can ALSO imprison the souls of those he eats inside himself, and they can apparently take over Bill's body too???

What actually is going on here? Is this one of Bill's powers? He can just eat entire universes and then whatever he consumes becomes a part of him? Or maybe it's something else...

Maybe if we looked at this less literally and consider the previous hints of Bill having a dissociative disorder then perhaps what is going on is that Bill is introjecting these people.

Maybe whenever he enters somebody's mind, some piece of them remains...

I would love to speculate more on this... But this is the only mention of it in the entire book!

At this point, I begin to reflect on the words at the beginning. Maybe it was true that the book was changing itself to give me what I wanted. Little hints of plurality to keep me reading, to ensnare me in its vicious trap and ultimately drive me to madness.

And the worst part was, I was falling into it anyway. Because I had to know, even if this was a trap, I was in it to the very end. My thirst for knowledge and understanding unquenchable.

Even if I knew I should stop here, there was no going back.

Stanford Pines, Bill's Perfect Host

At last, beyond all of the misdirects that were put in my way, I arrived at the reason that I started on this journey.

Stanford Pines.

I need to say that when I started this journey, planning to delve into what the plurality of Bill and Ford might be like, I never imagined that it would be handled so... Beautifully.

I mean that genuinely!

I love the relationship of these two characters in the book!

They are both very out of place in their own ways. Both are aware of things in their world that are denied by others, leaving them ridiculed and ostracized for it. They manage to form a genuine friendship. Even if Bill was using Stanford the whole time to achieve his Weirdmageddon.

The two compliment each other surprisingly well. Bill provides Stanford with a friend who can get him out of his comfort zone, which is something that I think Stanford really needed.

There's a really fun part of the book where Bill just gets Stanford mind-drunk, which is apparently something he can do.

Bill fills a role in Stanford's life that nobody had since he lost contact with his brother. While Stanford had friend in with Fiddleford, his lab partner, and we do get to see parts of that friendship in the book, they are more like work acquaintances.

Alas, it wasn't meant to be. Because in the end, Bill is still an evil demon who was bent on bringing about the Weirdmageddon and was manipulating Ford the whole time.

And when Stanford found out, he tried to shut Bill out. This led to Bill trying to communicate through sticky notes to get Ford to stop ignoring him. He would front in the body at night while Ford slept, and they carried on a conversation through these sticky notes.

Wait... Sticky notes?

This is such an interesting choice for the character! Especially after so many hints of Bill Cipher having some sort of dissociative disorder.

Why?

Because sticky notes are an actual method that real DID systems use to communicate with their alters, as seen in this post from the NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) website.

It's fascinating how, if you were to try to depict how headmates with strong dissociative barriers might communicate, this is one of the ways you would want to do that!

Is this coincidental? Maybe. But the talk of dissociation earlier suggests the author also has at least some basic knowledge of dissociation and how it works. And, perhaps, plurality as well?

Overall, this whole section with Bill and Ford was fantastic, and it was well-worth the read for that on its own.

The End?

I suppose this is the end. I found what I wanted. I got the content I was after. A cool plural story of a guy and his headmate from another dimension who wants to take over the world.

Through all the strange distractions and hints of Bill himself having headmates that seemingly went nowhere, I got more plurality in the book than I expected.

And yet, as I turn the final page of the book, I feel unsatisfied. Unsettled.

"Is that it?" I think to myself.

This is Gravity Falls, a show built on mysteries, and looking deeper than the surface. Surely there has to be more. Right?

What if... all the plurality in this book, is obscuring something deeper? Or maybe hinting at something deeper...

And then... I see it!

After the final page, I come to the About the Author section.

Which means it's time to talk about...

The Plurality of... Bill Cipher Alex Hirsch

Yes, I am going there!

In the beginning, I promised that this post will require me to break a rule I've held sacred through these posts.

That rule... is to never speculate on the plurality of the author.

But, Alex Hirsch, at least in a fictional sense, hasn't exactly shied away from the idea of being "possessed" by Bill. This dates back at least a decade, with him making Tweets like this one.

"Bill Cipher" even did an AMA on Reddit through Alex, playing it off as Bill possessing Hirsch while he slept.

It's a pretty open secret in the Gravity Falls community that Alex Hirsch is "possessed" by Bill. At least in some meta-fiction way that may not be canon to Gravity Falls but isn't quite real either.

And were my analysis to stop here, I wouldn't really be saying anything new or valuable. A lot of this was covered by MatPat on Film Theory.

But there's something I want to go back to that confuses me in this book.

That Bill Cipher... is an idea?

Let's bring this full circle, back to the beginning of the book where Bill mentions that he's imaginary and describes himself as an idea.

These are such weird lines because Bill didn't seem to have originated from people's minds within the narrative of Gravity Falls.

His story is of being a being from a literal flat world. So why then, does he describe himself as an idea? Why does he describe himself as imaginary???

Bill Cipher as Alex Hirsch's Tulpa

While Bill being an idea doesn't make sense if he's speaking as a being from a 2-dimensional world that's real to him, it does make sense if we consider that the Bill talking to us, who wrote the Book of Bill, is a tulpa sharing the body of its creator.

Before going on though, we need to answer an important question. What is a tulpa? The r/tulpas subreddit gives its own answer to this in its FAQ.

The simplest way to describe a tulpa is simply another person who was created intentionally/unintentionally through repeated interaction and shares a body and mind with their creator. A more complicated definition can go as follows: A tulpa is believed to be an autonomous consciousness coinhabiting a brain with their creator, often with a form of their creator's initial choice and design. A tulpa is entirely sentient and in control of their opinions, feelings, form and movement. They are willingly created via a number of techniques to act as companions, muses, and advisers. Tulpa forms can either be visualized in the mind's eye, or, with practice, seen as a hallucinatory figure using a technique called imposition.

And let's stop there on the line about being created as muses, because this is something that's found repeated throughout both The Book of Bill and Journal 3, with Stanford referring to Bill as his "muse."

It's a curious term that doesn't appear in the show, but was added to the lore in these two supplemental books.

The FAQ goes on to explain that while tulpas are often considered to be intentionally created, there are also accidental tulpas that can arise through imaginary friends or from writing characters.

Is it possible to accidentally make a tulpa? Yes - many people join the community after realizing they have had tulpas all their lives, but without knowing what they were called. These "accidental" tulpas often arise from imaginary friends and writing/roleplay characters.

On the point of roleplay characters, something I also haven't mentioned yet is that Alex Hirsch didn't just write the character of Bill Cipher. He WAS Bill Cipher. In the show, Bill is one of the characters Hirsch voices along with Grunkle Stan and Soos.

Writing tulpas and how they come about are discussed a bit more below:

Is this a new phenomena? No, it's a practice that goes back in recorded history at least as far as the Greek philosophers. The present name of the phenomenon is derived from the word used by Tibetan monks in the early 20th century. There's also evidence to suggest dedicated prayer can lead to the development of 'religious tulpas' in the minds of the particularly devout, and on the secular end, writing techniques similar to tulpa development techniques can and have resulted in writers creating accidental tulpas from their characters. Having a tulpa is nothing new, although it's gone by many names throughout the course of history and does so even today. However, we believe we are one of the first groups to address this practice as a psychological phenomena rather than a magical, occult or divine experience.

Tulpamancy and Attention

There was another passage from the book that I found noteworthy.

At the end, Stanford describes what truly sustains Bill isn't power, but attention, which Stanford describes as Bill's "lifeblood."

It's even underlined for emphasis.

Why is this important? Well first, this line goes back to the weird lines earlier suggesting Bill is an idea.

But more importantly, feeding on attention is something which is actually a pretty popular philosophy in tulpamancy. That tulpas feed on and are sustained by the attention of their hosts.

How do I give my tulpa energy? Tulpas are sustained by attention, and energy is a convenient metaphor for this. So, you can give your tulpa energy by interacting with them. It is also possible, through no shortage of work and time on the part of host and tulpa alike, for a tulpa to grow beyond this need and to learn how to sustain themselves.

How much attention/energy/interaction does my tulpa need? During the creation process you should aim to interact with your tulpa daily, anywhere from a few minutes up to a few hours, and narrating to them as and when you can. After they're fully vocal and active, the bare minimum is just acknowledging their existence, but spending time talking to them and interacting with them is very much the point of bringing them into existence. Just don't ignore them, and you'll both be fine.

On Parallels in Writing

Adding another layer, it's likely that Stanford Pines is at least partially based on Alex Hirsch himself.

One point of trivia is that Alex Hirsch has a twin sister, and Gravity Falls was inspired by vacations they would take as children. Dipper and Mabel being based on Alex and his sister is pretty well-known. But towards the end of season 2, it's revealed that their Grunkle Stan is a twin himself, with his brother being Stanford Pines, the author of the journals.

During this part of the story, it starts creating a parallel between the relationships of the younger and older twins, with Dipper (who is based on Alex) bonding with Stanford over how much they have in common. Both are nerds who are into writing and science and uncovering the mysteries of the world. Both are a bit socially awkward as well.

And while not much attention is drawn to this particular connection, both had experiences of making deals with Bill that let Bill takeover their bodies at different points.

Based on the parallels between Dipper and Stanford, one might speculate that Alex based Dipper on his younger self, while Stanford was loosely based on himself as an adult.

The personalities of these two characters are also the most likely to create a tulpa based on the psychological profiles of most tulpamancers.

In 2016, Dr. Samuel Veissiere, a psychiatry professor at McGill University, found the following in his study of tulpamancers:

From coding of qualitative interviews collected in large surveys, the most common tulpamancer profile to emerge is one of a highly cerebral, imaginative, highly articulate, upper-middle class, formally educated person with many consistently pursued interests, talents, and hobbies, but limited channels of physical social interaction. Typical tulpamancers are confident about their talents, but are quite modest and socially shy. They possess – or have cultivated – a high propensity for concentration, absorption, hypnotisability, and non-psychotic sensory hallucinations.

The psychological profile of tulpamancers fits both Dipper and Stanford to a t. And many of these same traits could just as easily be true for Alex Hirsch if these characters were meant to be stand-ins for himself.

Is Alex Hirsch trying to tell us that he's plural?

In the end, this is just a theory. And it's one that I feel nervous making because plurality is so deep and personal. That's why I've avoided speculating on the plurality authors in the past. Even when the writing feels so true to the plural experience that it's hard to imagine that someone who isn't plural wrote it.

So why am I making an exception with this one?

Well, in this particular case, I think that the breadcrumbs are being left intentionally, and if he is plural, then he expects somebody to follow them. I'm not worried that I would be outing somebody who didn't want others to find out.

With Alex Hirsch's love of codes and clues and mysteries, if he were plural, I have to imagine that the hints weren't accidental and he would be wondering if anybody would follow them.

And if I am completely off base and he's not plural, I think that he would still appreciate the theorizing anyway. 🤷‍♀️

But if these are intentional clues that were left behind to hint at a real life plurality, one might ask why.

Why would he want people to know about it, and hint at it in this way?

Well, I think the Book of Bill might have an answer to that too.

Shame is a powerful emotion. But it grows in the dark. The more I've tried to hide my past with Bill, the more hold it's had over me.

Perhaps this line is meant to reflect Alex Hirsch's own feelings. Because many plural systems have felt this same way about their plurality, having hide their relationships to their headmates.

The actual end now

Finally, we come to the real ending of this.

This is, again, just a theory. I don't want anyone taking it as fact. I admit that I could be completely wrong about everything that I've said here.

But if nothing else, it's at least fun to imagine that Alex Hirsch does have a Bill Cipher tulpa in his head that has been acting as his muse this whole time. And it would give a new meaning to the gag of the Weirdmageddon intro saying Gravity Falls was "created by Bill Cipher" all those years ago.

Thanks for reading, and if you have your own muse that you think might be more than a simple muse, be sure to read my guide on how to know if your imaginary friend is sentient.

And if you like this post and want to see more like it, you may want to check out The Plurality of… Avatar: The Last Airbender or The Plurality of… IF

[obsidianpen]

PSA: if you are not interested in reading about ‘fandom drama’, please skip this post. You are responsible for your internet experience. If, however, you care about exposing bullies and POS in fandom spaces (specifically the tomione fandom in this case), carry on.

I’m posting a document here that was recently shared with me. It’s about Greyana (if you don’t already know who this is, you’re not missing out, and I encourage you to ignore this post). Specifically, it’s about what a horrible person Greyana is in the fandom. I did not write it. I didn’t know about most of this until it was shared with me, including the parts where she attacked me specifically. I won’t go into all the details of what’s in this, but the short version is: Greyana has a history of harassing other writers, using alt accounts across multiple platforms to promote her work, employing bots to promote her work, using generative AI to write as much as she has in the first place (which means she has stolen from other writers to do so), and more. There is a reason she exists (as herself, anyway) only on specific platforms. Tumblr users didn’t put up with her shit and called her out, so she left. I therefore know I’m sort of speaking to the choir here, but I wanted to put this document out there. I probably should have shared it sooner, I just really didn’t want to get involved because she doesn’t deserve my attention. Now, however, I am, and I’m giving it to her… because this is about more than that.

I don’t like bullies. I don’t like malicious hypocrites, I don’t like liars, I don't like thieves, I don’t like people in fandom spaces tearing others down when we should be building each up and supporting each other, and I don’t like when it is painfully obvious that someone only cares about stats, about being ‘the best’ and about monetizing fanfiction in whatever way they can get away with (such as via TikTok). This isn’t about ‘fandom drama’ at this point. It’s about setting the precedent that this kind of deplorable behavior isn’t acceptable anywhere; that being abusive, deceptive, and malicious because ‘it’s only fanfiction’ does not make it tolerable.

The point in sharing this is simply to let people know. I’m not asking or telling anyone to do anything specific, although I encourage you strongly to not support her and people like her. These are the types of people who ruin fandom spaces. Who make other writers stop writing and feel good about themselves when they succeed in doing so. Actually, here’s something I’ll ask: if you like Voldemort/Hermione as a pairing and have considered writing it, now would be a great time! Because she has recently started spamming her volmione fic as though it is the only one worth reading, as though there simply aren’t any good ones out there (this is going to shock you, but there are), slamming those other fics, etc. 

Here is the link to the document again. It’s also posted below. It’s public. And keep in mind, this is only the shit that people thought to capture in screenshots before she deleted things. 

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Y4v_kUHBapUyqUqc4yOkD1TjduIO8pBk/view?usp=drive_link

[holly-louisexox]

Saviour II X Andy Biersack- Part 2

Masterlist

(Sequel to Ribcage)

Andy and Delia had finally found their happy ending in each other, Delia was living in LA with Andy and things could not be better.

With the group reuniting to complete a UK and Europe tour, some challenges threaten to tear Andy and Delia apart. Can Andy continue to try his hardest to be what Delia made, or will the couple drift apart from each other?

"So how excited are you for the UK?" Shevy asks through the phone as she and Delia discussed things via video call. "Honestly I cannot wait to take you to Gregg's and let you experience the greatness of their sausage rolls!"

"We're still on about the sausage rolls." Delia laughs shaking her head slightly. "Honestly I'm just hoping the Starbucks there is as good as the ones here in the States, you know what I'm like with my coffee."

"Starbucks is still pretty good in the UK don't worry." Shevy laughs "Oh, I just remembered as well, you've gone vegan recently haven't you?"

"Yeah." Delia nods "I mean it wasn't too much of a change considering I rarely ate meat anyway, but it just makes the food shop for me and Andy so much easier."

"Well, not to worry, Gregg's also do vegan sausage rolls which I imagine are still nice, I've never had one myself." Shevy explains before she's cut off.

"I can confirm they are nice." Andy chimes in as he climbs into bed next to Delia before placing his 'sacred' notepad on the bedside table; he had yet to show Delia what he was working on. "Hey Shevy."

"Hey Andy!" Shevy smiles "Have you come to steal my best friend away from me?"

"If anything I think you're going to be the one stealing my girlfriend away from me on this tour, so I've been savouring the time alone with Delia." Andy jokes making Shevy laugh.

"I'm sure we can share." Shevy jokes back.

"I am right here you know?" Delia pipes up joining in on the joke "Maybe I won't hang out with either of you this tour, I have been missing my second best friend Lonny after all."

"We need to remember Lonny's birthday this tour too." Andy announces suddenly which makes Delia look at him with a questioning glance.

"Andy, Lonny's birthday was 5 months ago." Delia is puzzled by Andy's comment.

"We should still celebrate it on tour, he can be like the old Queen of England and have multiple birthday celebrations." Andy laughs "Come on, it'll be a fun prank to pull on him randomly one show."

"Andy, is a prank war really a good idea?" Shevy rolls her eyes slightly "You know it's myself and Delia who will have to do the round of cleaning up and trying to control you and the band from doing anything too reckless."

"Shevy don't be such a buzz kill." Andy grins.

"Okay, just this one prank please." Shevy shakes her head slightly whilst smiling "Anyway I have a slightly earlier flight than you two so I need to sleep. I'll see you both in Norwich. Goodnight."

"Night Shevy." Andy and Delia speak in unison before the call ends; Delia then plugs her phone in to charge and places it on her bedside table before snuggling into Andy's side and looking up at him "So how was your evening? When are you going to show me what you're writing in that journal of yours?"

"Not yet. Honestly I don't even know if it's going to go anywhere." Andy shrugs slightly before wrapping his arms around Delia.

"You need to stop being so hard on yourself all the time Andy." Delia frowns slightly.

"I'm trying babe, I really am. I'm still not used to the idea of someone not wanting to criticise me all the time and judge my work." Andy sighs slightly before placing a soft kiss to Delia's forehead "I'm also worried that people will judge the songs I write for the band if it's obvious I'm a love sick puppy for you."

"Sometimes vulnerability is the best story." Delia tries to ease his mind "Look at how the fans react to Lost It All for example, they love seeing the vulnerable side, why not show them a happier vulnerability?"

"This is why you are the best thing in my life Delia Vincent." Andy smirks at her idea, it made sense, her ideas always did make sense. "I love you."

"I love you too." Delia grins back before pressing her lips to Andy's.

In the perfect world, Andy and Delia would have been very professional and would have gone straight to sleep and gotten an early night ready for their flight to the UK. However, the way that the two of them were enamoured with each other, that simply was not the case. Instead, they would be met the next morning with clothes thrown across the floor that they would have to rush to tidy away before leaving the house and heading to the airport.

----------------------------

"Delia!" Shevy screams excitedly as she sees Delia and Andy walk through the lobby of the hotel they were staying in.

"Shevy!" Delia screams back as she sees Shevy running to approach them before pulling Delia into a tight hug "It's so nice to see you again, I was just saying to Andy, once the others arrive I vote we all go out for food and catch up."

"I'm so down!" Shevy grins pulling away from the hug to look towards Andy teasingly "Hey love bug."

"Please do not start calling me that Shevy." Andy chuckles softly whilst shaking his head.

"Hey, I much prefer the smitten Andy to Moody Biersack." Shevy laughs before hugging Andy "It's good to see you happy still."

"That's fair, it's nice to feel happy." Andy speaks as Shevy once again pulls out of the hug.

"D, how's your dad doing?" Shevy then asks looking at Delia with sympathy in her eyes; only Andy and Shevy knew about Nick's cancer, she didn't really want to make it a big announcement in fear of it effecting her job, plus she was never one for sympathy and pity.

"Yeah, he's doing well, we spoke to him at the airport whilst we were waiting for our flight. Obviously he has the fatigue, nausea and his hair is thinning but he's managing." Delia nods sadly; yes her dad was doing well but it was still scary that he was having to go through treatment again, especially since she so nearly lost him the last time he had cancer.

"I'm glad to hear he's doing well honey, you're so brave for still wanting to do this tour." Shevy smiles placing a hand on her shoulder for comfort.

"I would love to be with him right now but he didn't want me to fuss over him." Delia continues to nod "Sadly dad is stubborn, more so than me."

"The others don't know either, we thought about telling them about Nick but decided against it. We just want to survive this tour and then we're going to visit our families after." Andy explains which makes Shevy nod.

"Okay, but D, you know if you need me you can always come find me. We can get coffee or something and just chat." Shevy smiles. "I know you have Andy but let's be real, sisters before misters aye?"

"Thanks Shevy." Delia smiles back "We should get checked in, we'll meet you down here in a bit? When the others get here let them know about food plans yeah?"

"On it." Shevy grins.

--------------------------------------

"There's our golden couple!" CC grins as he spots the 2 remaining group members making their way over. "This meal was your idea yet we were waiting on you. I don't want to know what you kids were doing."

"I don't know what you mean CC, I am a child of God." Delia jokes sending him a smirk; in reality, she and Andy had actually spoken to Tamara and Nick to let them know they had arrived safely. No one would admit it, but the circle was more fragile than they let off. Tamara and Nick were constantly worried about Delia and her safety since Seattle, although they trusted Andy to the fullest, and Delia and Andy were growing more and more concerned for Nick and his health, chemotherapy was not being kind to him.

"Yeah and I'm a virgin." CC shoots back making everyone in the group burst into laughter from the jokes of the two of them.

"It's good to see you looking well Delia." Lonny smiles.

"Lonny, thank goodness you're here! Andy and Shevy have been fighting over me so I'm hanging out with you." Delia explains as she walks over to Lonny and gives him a hug.

"As glad as I am to see you D, I'd rather not get in the middle of this in case Andy gets moody with me." Lonny laughs hugging her back whilst looking at Andy to really wind him up.

"Oh fuck you Lonny." Andy laughs shaking his head at his fellow band member.

"I'm just saying." Lonny laughs alongside him as he and Delia break from the hug.

"Have you guys seen her?" Andy's mood suddenly drops as he instantly takes a hold of Delia's hand as soon as she is standing back next to him; it was almost an instinct, as if he was trying to ground himself or make sure he didn't lose Delia.

"No we haven't. I don't even know if she's here yet or if she's going to be arriving later, but management would tell us if she wasn't coming surely." Jake explains.

"Honestly I'd rather just avoid her." Andy sighs which makes Delia squeeze his hand to try and comfort him.

"She won't do anything Andy, even if she tries to we're all gonna be around so it'll be her word against ours." Jinxx explains which makes Andy nod anxiously.

"Yeah, yeah you're right." Andy agrees before looking at Delia "I just hope she doesn't try to mess anything up."

"She won't Andy." Delia smiles at him "We're both happy, she can't take that away from us, right?"

"Yeah, right." Andy smiles before kissing Delia's forehead.

"Can we go get food now? I'm hungry." Lonny groans breaking the moment between Andy And Delia.

"Yeah, I'd rather not lose my appetite from you two love sick puppies." CC pretends to vomit whilst holding back a laugh from his own joke.

"Lonny when are you not hungry?" Delia rolls her eyes whilst completely ignoring CC and his comment.

"Hey, I'm not always hungry!" Lonny defends himself.

"Yet you're the one who will just sit there and eat straight up bread from his bag." Andy teases Lonny.

"Right yeah, it was one time. You're never going to let me live that down are you?" Lonny sighs whilst trying his hardest not to laugh.

"Nope, you and your weird snacks will always be one of us." Shevy laughs. "Now come on, let's get food I'm starving."

It was refreshing for Delia to be back with the group and despite everything, the dynamic had not changed one bit. She just prayed that it would remain this way. She could sense Andy's anxiety without him having to verbalise it, she knew he did not want to face Juliet and she couldn't blame him after what had happened. As much as Delia trusted Andy, the idea of Juliet being here did bring her own anxieties to surface. The last thing she wanted was to lose Andy because of her, plus she was extremely worried to face this woman. Yes she is very pretty, but that is not her worry. Her worry was linked to the abuse and manipulation Juliet had projected onto Andy in the past, Juliet completely broke him and ruined him until he was nothing and could trust no one. Andy had just become whole again and Delia would hate to see him return to that, she was unsure if even she could save him from that if he returned to that state of mind again.

...All of these wild thoughts were just anxieties and Delia's overthinking, right?

[onlyhereforangst]

I don’t go here but you’ve mentioned chenford isn’t great. Do I know what Chenford is? No. Do I still know they broke up? Yes.

Pls share the fandom lore and ur thots 🎤

ok so.

chenford, or lucy chen & tim bradford- former rookie & training officer, respectively. the actual characters have been written so fucking phenomenally i barely have words (she says as if she isn’t about to just. go off). they have managed to truly incorporate authentic human flaws and emotions and decision-making into these characters which have, across six seasons, played out for gorgeous individual & paired character arcs. like they are GREAT are they in a great spot? no. but they are FANTASTIC.

now.

if you were to ask the fandom that same question. excuse me while i die laughing 💀 unfortunately the strikes really helped a large majority of the chenford fandom to twist canon into barely recognizable fanon and now that canon is back and progressing as it absolutely narratively should people are losing their gd minds. deactivating accounts, claiming their done with the show, touting that they’ve been manipulated a bold face lie if you have critical thinking skills but i digress. there’s a select few of us having the time of our damn lives, feeling blessed to have such good writing on a procedural????? of all things. unheard of. truly.

so yeah the fandom is Something because who doesn't enjoy a feast of delicious angst? i mean lucy cannot stop inserting herself into every situation, even her boyfriend who has repeatedly asked her to not because he is trying to protect her (this is it's own separate problem) but literally flinging yourself around outright screaming at your significant other is just. not it. i speak from experience 💀 this is not how you get someone to healthily tell you what's bothering them to the point of tears multiple times. its like if lucy isn't the default hero she just cannot handle? its insane and beautiful because its her tragic flaw coming to a glorious, screeching climax. AND meanwhile??? so is tim's!!!! his loyalty to a tragic fault got him in a bind and he doesn't know what to do and can't handle and thinks protecting the one he loves by shutting her out is the way to be most loyal to HER because suddenly he doesn't feel he deserves her so he's going to break his own heart since lucy was too polite to do it.

anyways this storyline has been blessedly built up with undertones and crumbs since literally the end of season 4 and the fandom acts like it was a total blindside. lmao honeys. have you watched the show??? plus its been teased in interviews for over a year i can't 😭

both characters have a LOT of growing and self-discovery to happen individually before they can even begin to consider being in a relationship. not when that relationship had been built on a foundation of subordinate-superior. that *shockingly* doesn't equate to a romantic relationship of equals and guess what?! it had its ramifications!!! miscommunication trope my beloved you slayed.

ok that was surely more than you wanted seek but a million voice notes to the like 2 people that have been calling this storyline with me since the beginning and the vibrating still isn't out of my system!!! cheers to the hate anons i'm sure to get if anyone takes the time to read this 🍻

[zot3-flopped]

https://www.tumblr.com/zot3-flopped/763101878717399040/from-someone-who-saw-them-backstage-at-an-awards

This is one of the best examples of “Harry and Louis are reduced to fan fiction characters” out there

I’ve read my fair share of Larry fanfic back in the day before I saw the light. I was a typical Larrie - depressed, lonely, and naive during the pandemic - for about 5 months I read everything I could about this conspiracy theory, fanfic included, and it’s unreal how many fanfic conventions have bled into what larries consider as real life stories. Thankfully for me, some medication, a return to the real world after quarantine and some socialization that didn’t involve my IPad, and I can’t even imagine how I believed all that non sense, and all that left of it for me is that I love Harry, which isn’t such a bad thing! But the effect of fanfic in keeping this all going is huge in my opinion

And this “receipt” is one of the most common tropes in Larry fanfic. Louis is loud and annoying and unable to control himself and only Harry can calm him. Whether it’s them as band mates or just in AU stories, even Niall, Liam and Zayn look to Harry to “control” Louis. Lots of dom/sub BDSM undertones, some more explicit then others.

This isn’t a “receipt”, it’s fan fiction put on top of real people lives and it’s so sad. Someday, someone will write a book about how Larry fanfic kept this stupid theory going long after it should have been shut down.

So pleased your time in Larrie Land didn't last long. I've seen multiple ex Larries who got on medication for depression or psychosis and gradually stopped believing in Larry. It really is a mental illness - a form of erotomania.

Agree with what you say about the trope of wild Louis who needs to be controlled and dominated by Harry. Alpha/Omega fics are now far and away the most popular Larry fics, and in all of them Louis is a tiny, naughty, disruptive omega who only calms down and becomes docile when he goes into heat and has sex with gigantic Alpha Harry.

[nightmare-dreamt]

heya! idk if you're doing matchups anymore but if you are can you please tell me who I'll match up with!!!

To talk about my personality, I'm 19 F (She/her), I am also a psych undergrad. I love learning, reading, writing, films, painting, dancing (anything art related tbh). And I'm actually kinda mediocre at all of them.....I also love to hang out with people, oh if it helps I'm an ENFJ, also a Sagittarius Sun.

I'm pansexual so anyone's fine, but they should be an adult preferably older than me.....

I dislike rude people, close-minded people, and coconuts lol......

My dream is to be a filmmaker and also a writer.......

Thank you!!! i really love your writing!!! Have a nice week!!!

Matchup for Anon!

AOT: Zeke

He seems like someone who would be into psycology and the aspects around it. He would have a bunch of books on psychology and all of them are read and written in with his own personal notes. Mention something to him and he knows everything about it and is also willing to help with your homework or projects if needed.

Idk man, he gives major supportive boyfriend vibes. Like when he heard you wanted to major in psychology he was all for it ready to be there when you were in need of it. He's also there when you have a bad day, ready to comfort and do whatever you're in need of or want to do. He'll support all of your choices and goals, refusing to let you give up on your dreams.

MHA: Aizawa

Learning is a big part of his life, considering he's a teacher and deals with it everyday of his life almost. When you're ever in need of some help he's right there with a warm cup of whatever drink you like.

Stealing clothes occurs often in your gusy relationship. You're Isually seen wearing one of his shirts or pants that are way too big for you normally being a little big on him. When going to sleep, you make sure to have one of his shirts on enjoying the comfortable feeling that it gives. He doesn't understand it, but he's not going to stop you thinking that you look cute in his clothes.

Haikyuu: Oikawa

You're no longer surprised when hearing a knock at your door and he's there causing trouble acting like a total goofball. He'll play some music on his phone and then grab your hand bringing you close just so the two of you could dance together like an old married couple. It's gotten to the point where the two of you have a shared playlist of music that the two of you dance to whether it be slow or some upbeat song that doesn't make sense.

It's seen multiple times throughout that Oikawa has a fan base and it can be difficult sometimes, especially with your guy's relationship. One thing he won't ever allow from his fans, is someone disrespecting you in any sort of way. When it does happen, that person will receive the nastiest look of their life. One time, someone caught a fight about to break out between him and a fan who said something rude to you and from that day on no one ever commented badly on his s/o.

[mysumeow]

Hello!! I've been a huge fan of your work for some time now, actually. I actually like your writing style because it's neat and somehow appealing to my eyes, from one writer to another! I'd like to try this matchup game and this is also my first time as well😭😭 I hope I'm doing this right. I'd like a genshin matchup please and thank you!!!

For appearance, I have long hair and I work out from time to time. I'm skinny with a slight curve!!! Working on that. I do dancing but never singing because many of the people I know express their distaste for my voice😭 Point is, I do exercise and dance a lot. (Im a girl btw!!! don't know where I should slip this in)

I'm not really smart, I consider myself to be quite dull but not at the same time. I have amazing grades and sometimes get into the top 5 but I get distracted too easily, especially the day before exams(somehow I still pass.) When I'm with the people I like, I get extremely comfortable no matter where the both of us are. There are multiple times where I almost got hit by a vehicle because of how carefree I am around my friends.

I'm a people person, talkative extrovert 100%!! I love people and everyone I meet, I wave at strangers who wave at me and I strike up a conversation whoever is next to me anywhere, anytime. There was this one time I talked to this cute mom outside of a mall because I was bored, I also remember getting scolded a LOT by my friends because why do I even talk to strangers willingly? I don't know. It's just who I am, really.

I have a strong distaste for shameless and loud people, I don't usually mind the most of them but when they are in front of me or during an important event where everyone is supposed to be quiet, my head just hurts. I also engage in gossip from time to time, but not those who bring people down. Just the sharing of opinions. I also don't like fish. a lot.

For my bigger flaws, I have a highly anxious avoidment attachment style and I apply it to everyone I meet. I am also very prone to overthinking and daydreaming, a day cannot pass without both of these happening. I'm not proud at ALL. All of this happened because of something that happened in the past, I constantly look for the same feeling the person gave me in everyone I meet, and feel disappointed when I don't find it at all. BUT I DONT LEAVE WHEN I DONT. I like people. But I'd like it better if they gave me the same warmth she did in the past.

Oh this is getting really long I gotta stop ramblingAAAHHH. So my hobbies are writing and gaming. I have great pride over what I write and I never doubt my plots. I also love animals except those that are taller than me(doesn't apply to dogs). I like eating. I eat four times a day and I don't even get breakfast.

OKAY I think that's all, sorry for the ramble!! 😭😭 Thank you for reading this, and wow this feels like a Twitter profile thread. Only thing missing is the More About Me ↓

. . . ꒰ MATCHUP II

A/N: A fellow writer!  Hahaha don’t worry anon, I like reading these submissions! Also, I think it’s the first time someone has described my writing like that, so it was a bit surprising for me :OOOOO  Thank you! <33

I match you with Kazuha! He finds it endearing how genuine you are and your knack of opening a conversation. Even as a wandering samurai, it’s few the amount of people he has met like you, and your friendly demeanor captures his heart with ease. When you ramble on about your day or anything you want to speak about with him, he looks at you with fondness. He pays attention to everything you say and remembers important details, without interrupting or feeling bored about hearing you speak.

He has a scarily excellent memory. He’ll ask you about how’s it going with the last story you were writing like, months ago—after you had spoken to him about it once…

He doesn’t scold you when you get distracted, instead opting for redirecting your attention or guiding you back into safety while keeping the conversation with you. If it’s a life-or-death situation, he’ll grab you by the arm and pull you away from the danger, while apologizing for taking such an abrupt decision but letting you know there was peril awaiting you.

Thanks to Kazuha’s patience and forgiving nature, he sees beauty in your amiability and in your whims. He does get extra vigilant when you get distracted or opts to choose safer routes within his means whenever the two of you are strolling around or traveling.

If you travel in the Crux Fleet, there’s plenty of gossip going around, even during your brief stay. Kazuha isn’t one for seeking gossip, but without putting any effort into it, they make their way into his knowledge. You’ll have lots of conversation with him.

Likewise, Kazuha likes to daydream. He enjoys the moments of silence too, and you’ll often find him daydreaming while looking at the sea or writing a haiku. He’ll recite it to you if he sees you’re curious about it.

Kazuha deals well with your attachment style. Even if your absence isn’t pleasant to him because he really enjoys your company, he’s understanding and won’t hold a grudge for it. He’ll wait for you to come back and welcome you.

Honorable mentions for this matchup: Thoma and Kaveh.

Very broad explanation: As long as you’re not causing any trouble to the Kamisato Clan, Thoma’s a people person too. Kaveh loves to talk. He’d match your energy when you want to chat with him.

[wxlfbites]

Yeah no offense but you don’t need to be griping about the quality of taxidermy from this person to all of tumblr. Taxidermy scraps (regardless of quality) can range anywhere from $15-50 US dollars, depending on the kind of scrap or tail, and the seller. Bitching about it on tumblr (and frankly in the otherkin tags, that has nothing to do with this??) seems petty and very rude. Unless someone is actively assaulting, harming, or grooming people, you don’t need to be doxxing.

1.) How is this doxxing? Nowhere in that post did I mention the persons legal name, their address (let alone even their state), or any identifying information other than their public Etsy shop name. Stop using buzzwords you don’t even understand.

2.) The problem is that she’s very very intentionally trying to sell scrap quality tails as high quality, spiritual taxidermy when it’s anything but. To quote some things directly from her shop:

“”My experiences range from the cerebral (a Master's degree in counseling psychology emphasizing ecopsychology) to the spiritual (over a decade's practice in neopaganism and neoshamanism).

“”Since 1998, I've been working with hides, bones, beads, and other such things in my artwork. I've created ritual tools, sacred costumery, jewelry and other devotional objects.

“” I began this work almost fifteen years ago as a way to honor the animals who once wore these skins and bones. I wanted them to have a better "afterlife" than being a trophy on someone's wall or a coat in a closet. The artistic and spiritual are very deeply entwined in my work, and every creation, no matter how simple, is a devotional to these sacred remains.

“”I've shared more about what I do and how others can take part through my writings. I have several books in print, including "Skin Spirits", a how-to book on the spiritual as well as practical end of working with animal parts and "Skull Scrying", a booklet on using animal skulls in divination. My latest book is "Nature Spirituality From the Ground Up: Connect With Totems In Your Ecosystem" from Llewellyn Publications.

“”I offer years of experience and finely-honed creativity in my work, and a strong spiritual component to my creations.

“”The majority of the animal parts and other components are secondhand or salvaged, either from old fur coats and the like, or discarded from the fur coat industry, or old jewelry and other found objects, though be aware there are some newer/not recycled remains incorporated in some projects as well.

So she’s been in the business for well over two decades, which means not only should she have the skill, but the knowledge, to distinguish between what kind of tail is considered scrap and what isn’t. Nowhere in any of her taxidermy listings does she specify that they are scraps. She is selling them as whole items that are of high quality.

She specifically mentions her spirituality being part of her work multiple times, even including her personal beliefs (not just general “please respect this tail” stuff) on how to care for the animal spirit that is attached to the tail. Now, don’t get me wrong, I personally believe taxidermy can retain spirits, but to quote the letter she included with my tail:

“You can connect with the spirit of the tail itself” […] “Before you put the tail on to wear it, ask the spirit of the tail for permission”.

This to me, even as a pagan myself, seems inappropriate to ask of someone who bought something from you over the internet.

I’ve literally been buying tails from Etsy shops since 2012, this is the most expensive tail I’ve ever bought, and never once have I seen a tail in such poor condition. If I’m paying almost $50 for something I am being told is high quality, by someone who claims to have over 20 years of experience, I expect that! And so should everyone else. I also recently started doing taxidermy myself. I work with bones and I just finished my first preserved rabbit foot. Even my rabbit foot, on my first try, is better quality than Lupa’s tail and if I sold him I’d only ask $15 max! $47 for something I’ve seen done better at my local renaissance fairs by people who only just started working with animals and going for $20 is outrageous.

Finally, you don’t know how reviews work, clearly. Just because I’m not kissing the feet of the seller and spouting on about how much I love being ripped off, doesn’t mean I’m bitching. I’m giving my honest opinion and review on a shop to inform others what to expect if they purchase it. I didn’t tell anyone not to buy from her, I didn’t say she was a piece of shit, I didn’t disrespect her in anyway. I gave facts about the quality of the tail and my opinions about whether I thought it was worth it. Which it isn’t.

Ya’ll kids be getting soft in the head if you can’t even read a review without whining about doxxing and bitching and being a bully.

(Also side note, I put it in the otherkin tags and shit because if you took 5 seconds to look at my account, you’d know I’m nonhuman so I’m posting in nonhuman tags. And if you took another 5 seconds to look up the seller, she also at one point identified as otherkin, has marketed her taxidermy and books to otherkin and has written books specifically about otherkin, making her a prominent figure in otherkin spaces.)

[koraki-pharmakis]

10 Myths About Hellenismos

Today, let's address some popular myths (and the truths) about Hellenismos and its deities. Not very surprisingly, most of these things come from Wicca or Christian colonization. You can believe these things if you want, they just aren't from the religion.

Myth 1: Deity work is dangerous

Truth: Deity work, in Hellenismos, isn't any more dangerous than worshiping the Christian god is supposed to be. This notion didn't originate in Hellenismos, and is also a largely neopagan idea. Our theoi aren't monsters or aggressive. They won't kill you over tiny mistakes. Just respect them, do what you can, and you'll be fine.

Remember that even in the mythos, people aren't smited for the wrong offering. They're smited for blatant and deliberate disrespect, which by nature can't be done accidentally.

Our deities genuinely aren't easily angered. They wont be mad if you reach out to them, if you confuse them for something else, if you give them the wrong offering, etc.

Myth 2: You need to look out for entities impersonating deities

Truth: Again, this isn't remotely from Hellenismos. Our gods cannot be impersonated by evil entities. Frankly, we don't really have entities with that desire or power in the religion. If you're contacting a Hellenic deity, and you get an affirmative response, you contacted them. The idea you didn't, or that something else is lying to you, is from outside the religion. Our deities are more powerful than random ghosts, and our religion doesn't have that concept.

Myth 3: Hekate is a moon goddess/crone

Truth: Hekate is associated with the moon, but she is not a goddess of the moon. She is the goddess of one lunar phase--the dark moon, which is on the eve of Hekate's Deipnon. She is also not a crone goddess outside of neopaganism and Wicca. Historically, she was depicted as a maiden. Her triple form was also not maiden/mother/crone, simply a triple maiden-esque figure.

Myth 4: Hestia gave her seat to Dionysos/Apollon took Helios's chariot

Truth: Honestly, it's just a difference in counting. Some deities were and weren't Olympians depending on time, culture, and locations. No seats on Olympos were "given up," it's just that sometimes one is there and sometimes the other isn't.

As for the chariot, no. Apollon didn't replace Helios. They were synchronized, but Apollon didn't "take" the chariot, and Helios was never removed. Helios is still the sun--his name is literally "sun."

Myth 5: The myths are history/Hellenic Polytheists believe in the myths

Truth: The characters in myths are real to us, and some myths are literal, but in general, Hellenic mythology is not meant to be taken fully literally. Most of it is symbolic. Additionally, a lot of the r*pe in the mythos is translation errors. We believe in our heroes and our gods, and we believe there is truth in the myths, but no, our mythology isn't like Christian mythology--it's not expected or really encouraged to believe the myths are strictly true history. The myths aren't even consistent over time and location, so it's simply impossible to believe in all of them at once. But no, our gods do not act the way they do in mythology. Myths are by and for mortals, and do not capture the divine.

Myth 6: It's disrespectful to dress up as or write fiction about the gods

Truth: This is just ridiculous and ahistoric. The majority of Ancient Greek theater was deity cosplay and fanfiction. I said what I said.

This can definitely be done disrespectfully, but isn't inherently disrespectful. You also aren't required to represent the theoi fully accurately in this.

Myth 6: X god is Y orientation/gender

Truth: While you can certainly theorize our theoi's sexuality, and none of our gods are cishet by modern standards, none of the gods can only be interpreted as one gender or orientation. The terms we ascribe to them are based on mythos, portrayals, and modern interpretation of historic social roles.

The most common of these theories are maiden goddesses as aroace (ie. Hestia, Athena, Artemis), erastes (top) gods as bi men (ie. Zeus, Apollon, Patroklos), eromenos (bottom) gods as gay men (ie. Ganymedes, Hyakinthos, Akhilleus), and Artemis as a lesbian.

None of these are wrong, to be clear. It's just not as simple as using our modern labels for them. Erastes and eromenos were both considered straight in Ancient Greece; being a 'virgin' didn't always mean celibate; Artemis can be interpreted as bi, lesbian, and/or aroace based on her myths. You can interpret them however you like--I certainly interpret my gods as queer--but there is no single right answer.

Myth 7: You need a patron or to be devoted to someone, or can only have one patron/be devoted to one god, & devotion is an oath

Truth: Patron deities are more of a principle in neopaganism and Wicca than in Hellenismos. Worshiping the theoi does not require you to find a patron or devote to a deity, ever. Patronage is not particularly important or common, unless you are thinking of a patron god of a trade (ie. if you're a blacksmith your patron is Hephaistos).

Devotion is also not exclusive, and never requires an oath. Oaths in Hellenismos are extremely serious, and should never be taken without extreme caution. If you aren't willing to die if you break the oath, don't make it--find something else. You probably wont die, but that's the necessary level of certainty. Devotion, while serious, is not as serious as being oath-bound. You can be devoted to multiple deities, and devotion can be called off if needed. You can't really call off an oath.

Myth 8: X god is a r*pist!

Truth: Please stop it. Just stop it. No. Especially if you're basing that on Lore Olympus. The mythology isn't fact, weird inaccurate mythology fanfic written by someone who doesn't know anything about the myths isn't fact.

The mythology isn't straight up history. The myths were often mistranslated (the Greek word for r*pe didn't just mean r*pe) and they aren't facts. They were also products of their culture. So. No. They are not. And their worshipers aren't r*pe apologists.

Myth 9: Titans are evil and/or Olympians hate titans

Truth: Titans are fine. Really. They're not evil, they're not going to hurt you. They're just another kind of Theoi. Many of them were actually a large part of the historic religion. Hekate's Deipnon was a monthly festival, after all. And no, Olympians don't hate titans. Remember the point about myths not being literal.

Myth 10: The gods are jealous

Truth: No, the gods will not be jealous if you worship another god. They wont be jealous if you worship another pantheon, or if you need a break. If you're a god consort, they won't be jealous if you're interested in other mortals or deities. If you're a devotee, they won't be upset if you devote to other deities.

The most jealous a god gets is upset if you break an oath, promise, or agreement with them. If you promised them a daily libation but skipped it for another deity without permission, they may get upset. But even then, that's not really jealousy.

Myth 11: If you work with X deity, you can't work with Y

Truth: This is usually based on rivalry in mythology, and isn't true at all. Related to the above jealousy point, no deity in real life hates another deity, especially not enough that if you worship both they'll be upset. You can worship Aphrodite and Persephone. You can honor Hera and Leto.

Most of these gods are actually happy if you honor other theoi. Many of them are family, or share domains.

If enough people are interested, I might make a part two, because this is barely the tip of the iceberg. RBs welcome from pagans and non-pagans alike.

[livebloggingmydescentintomadness]

Hi Momdad, I'm not entirely sure how to word this, so I'm sorry if I ramble. (Honestly feel free to ignore this if you don't have time/spoons, it's not pressing.) I've been struggling recently with questions concerning purity culture ish and critical thinking skills in regards to reading and media consumption. I have friends that tend to "vet" their authors, looking up on Twitter or Google if an author has had any scandals or has been known to have homophobic, transphobic, etc. views—(1/4)

or write -phobic portrayals into their work, and if they find stuff like that, they'll tend to decide against reading the book. And I tend not to pay attention so much to what authors do or discourse on Twitter. I just read books that interest me. But it makes me question like... is it wrong to consume works written by people who are known to be [insert]-phobic here or having poor takes, or have portrayed certain demographics poorly in their writing? (2/4)

I don't have great critical thinking skills (which makes me feel dumb because I feel like I just... never learned it well in school—live in US and mid-20s, for reference) but would it not be okay to... to read things, keeping in mind potentially poor takes the author has, or has written into their work, and see how it affects the work itself? Is it bad to still enjoy a work knowing the author's a not great person (either in views or just like, bad behavior online or to fans or whatever)? (3/4)

Like I stopped having anything to do with Harry Potter outside of fanfic due to JKR, but most authors... don't have her level of reach and power and sway, I feel? I don't know. I feel silly for struggling with these questions but they always come to mind whenever my friends share the latest ish with authors and whatnot. I'm sorry for such a long ask. x_x; I hope you're doing all right, and thank you for always being such a comforting presence online here. (4/4)

hello, dear! i think this is an issue that a lot of people are questioning right now, and i'd like to compliment you on, in fact, having the critical thinking skills to question whether this is the right thing to do and ask someone else their opinion instead of mindlessly following everyone else. the fact that you want to consider this topic carefully reflects well on you, i think.

so, i have strong feelings about purity culture, largely because i was raised as a homeschooled conservative in texas, and i spent my adolescence in the baptist church. i signed a purity pledge and wore a purity ring, the whole nine yards. having broken out of that mind-prison, i have absolutely no patience for anyone trying to talk me back into it.

BUT, i think this topic does, in fact, have nuance, as almost everything does, and there is no one-size-fits-all answer to every piece of media, so we need to keep considering this from multiple angles.

i know i'm going to have a lot to say here and this post is already long, so i'm going to break them down into separate chunks for ease of my writing and your reading.

EDIT: i tried to put this as bullets with spaces between them, but posting removed the spaces, making it harder to read. i’m going to replace the bullets with an emoji symbol.

🔸 first off, we have to understand and accept that there is no such thing as "moral purity" or "unproblematic media", much less unproblematic humans. humans are inherently flawed. humans make mistakes. humans commit selfish acts. humans fuck up and do the wrong thing, even if they don't mean to. most people have bad opinions about something, if you ask long enough. i'm certainly not morally pure, and you should NEVER trust someone who claims that THEY are.

🔸 part of the issue with purity culture, in this context, is the way it flattens everything to issues of black and white, so that everything Bad becomes equally bad by virtue of being ~problematic~. thereby, an active nazi can be on the same list as someone who said something homophobic ten years ago. these things are not the fucking same.

🔸 the true difference, in my opinion, is someone who means active harm and someone who commits harm unintentionally. jk rowling means active harm to trans people, and she uses the revenue from her media to fund her campaign against trans people. THAT'S why you boycott her, not simply because she has bad opinions. if you were to come across another author who portrayed trans people negatively in their work, look them up online and find that they've realized they were wrong and have apologized for it, that's perfectly fine. we all have to learn and grow, and unfortunately sometimes your old Bad Opinions exist out in the world where you can't change them.

🔸 now you might go online and look up the author who wrote something transphobic and find that they haven't said anything one way or another about trans people. they've neither apologized nor gone all in on trans hate. (or any other form of bigotry.) at that point, it's your call. it's 100% up to you whether you enjoy the media enough that you want to keep going anyway, or if the content makes you too uncomfortable to continue.

🔸 since nothing is 100% pure and unproblematic, it's about what we personally can tolerate and what makes us most uncomfortable. some people have thick skins, some people don't. that's okay.

🔸 now, even though i say that, i think it's also a mistake to surround ourselves entirely with media that makes us comfortable 100% of the time. art doesn't exist just to be Good and Pure, it also exists to express dark emotions, give catharsis, push us, make us think, make us grow, open our minds to new experiences and new truths. a piece of media can contain absolute heinous depictions of bigotry for many purposes other than to say that bigotry is good. bigotry exists, trauma induced by bigotry exists, and we can't just bury it under pretty and nice stories and act like it doesn't.

🔸 part of learning to think critically is exposing yourself to things you don't agree with and coming to understand why you don't agree with them. if you support trans people but don't know WHY you support trans people, do you even support trans people? you shouldn't believe what you believe just because people tell you it's the right thing to believe. you need to understand why it's right, or else you're in serious danger of someone skilled at manipulation convincing you to believe whatever they want you to believe.

🔸 we have to relearn that consuming media doesn't inherently mean endorsing all of its messages. reading a book does not mean you approve of everything it says or everything the author has ever done, even if you enjoy the book. you do not somehow become responsible for the author's flaws just because you took enjoyment from a story they told. that is a simply preposterous concept. no art in the world could be consumed if we were all held accountable for anything the artist had ever done wrong, because we have ALL done things wrong.

🔸 there are a lot of "problematic" things that are problematic only in some people's opinions. some people might look at shows like our flag means death, what we do in the shadows, hannibal, and interview with a vampire and say that it's homophobic to represent queer people as murderers who kill without remorse. some people say "queer people can have a little murder, as a treat." one person's problematic is another person's playground.

🔸 don't trust people who tell you that you aren't allowed to read certain books. seriously.

🔸 now, on the other hand, there are some pieces of media that are made as deliberate propaganda. brooklyn nine-nine is a great example, because it's a hilarious show with fantastic characters, but it's also police propaganda. it's made to make young people - the sort who don't watch law and order or blue bloods - believe that there are good cops fighting against discrimination from the inside. it teaches you that a gay black cop is a good cop, that a bisexual latina cop is a good cop. they're not. there are no good cops. so while it's not that you shouldn't be "allowed" to watch b99, i think that you should only watch it if you're capable of watching it fully aware that its goal is to feed you propaganda. you definitely should not recommend it to people like it's a harmless sitcom.

🔸 i don't think it can ever be morally wrong to simply read a book or enjoy a story, and at the same time, you can never assure yourself that what you're consuming is 100% free from any form of bigotry. i'm not saying you need to write an essay deconstructing every piece of media you ever consume, but you also can't do a quick google, find no dirt on an author, and assure yourself that everything you're about to read is good and correct. there's nothing wrong with wanting to just turn your brain off for a while and read a damn story, but you still need to have enough wits about you think, "hold on, describing a fat person as a slob and a pig and a mean, selfish bully with many degrading descriptions of their fatness used to emphasize how they're a bad person isn't okay." (which is, you know, another problem with the harry potter books.) you can relax and read a story but also keep watch for bullshit.

🔸 in my opinion, most of this stuff about obsessing over which authors and artists and other creators are Bad has absolutely nothing to do with morality and everything with wanting to feel superior. it's like a godless religion, as there are many religious people out there who only go to church so they can be seen going to church, so they can assure themselves they're better than people who don't go to church. since most of the youth aren't religious, they're finding new ways to feel morally superior to others, and instead of righteous vs sinful, it's pure vs problematic. and just the same, they find ways to justify the things they like as righteous, while always maintaining superiority over people who enjoy the sinful things they don't like.

🔸 bottom line: read whatever the hell you want, but keep your eyes open.

if you'd like to read more, check out my purity culture tag.

[xxwritemeastoryxx]

Hidden Marks

Author: xxwritemeastoryxx

Pairings: Elijah Mikaelson x Reader

Request:  Hii! If you still taking request I want ask for an soulmate au with Elijah, where which one of them have the same mark. He and his soulmate are very good friends for a long time and never have thought about this, but someday he see her mark and find out about this but don't tell her for being afraid of hurting her because of his family -Anon

Word Count: 1.6K

Warnings: Tad bit of angst, mentions of blood, but that's canon at this point.

Author’s Note: I apologize that this wasn't out earlier today. But there was some things in it that were bugging me and I just couldn't let it post without fixing it! It's still the 7th for me so this is your fic for the day! I hope you guys enjoy it!

Feedback gives me life and motivation for future things. ♥

“Oh come on,” Y/N said as she turned and faced Elijah as a smile pulled at her lips. “Are you really telling me that you’ve given up on looking?”

Elijah shook his head slightly as he let a huff of air past his lips. “For as many times as you’ve tried to persuade me to find who my soulmate is, my answer has remained the same.”

“Deep down I don’t think you mean it.” Y/N said with a slight tilt of her head. “You give the advice of your best friend ‘needing’ to find who she is ‘destined’ to be with, but you wont take your own advice or mine for that matter.”

When Elijah was younger, he believed that Soulmates finding each other was something magical. He may have lived with his mother who was a witch, and even a few of his brothers, but this was different. Elijah could remember the stories some of the villagers told him about how they found their soulmates. That the marks they were born with would match the person they were meant to be with.

Elijah had hoped that his soulmate would come along and he’d get to experience that kind of magic that he witnessed. He wondered who his soulmate was. How he would meet them and when they would realize who they were to each other. But when Henrik died, Elijah had felt his opportunity to meet his soulmate had been lost the moment he became a vampire.

The magical feeling he once believed in had been diminished over time. As the centuries had passed Elijah had never once met someone who he would ever be his soulmate. That there was no longer someone out there that would share the same mark as he did. As the years passed, the thoughts of a soulmate had all but diminished.

Elijah’s mark had been just below his left clavicle. The mark is a few shades darker than his skin tone. An intricate design of three circles intertwined in a horizontal line. His clothing always covering the mark from everyone around him. So long as it was covered, he wouldn’t be asked about it.

At least that was until Y/N came into his life. The vampire may have been several centuries younger than him, but they had become close friends over the past century. Elijah had met her during his time away from Klaus. The need to be away from his brother for a while had proved to be much needed. And when he met Y/N there didn’t seem to be anyone else better to spend his time with.

But during that time, he never mentioned what his mark looked like, let alone asked her what her mark looked like. Y/N was like Elijah in some ways. She once believed that soulmates were like fairytales. But when she turned, the notion of having her soulmate found had diminished.

“Was it not just a few hours ago that you reminded me that you’d rather not find them?” Elijah asked as he watched her.

The smile she had on her face faded slightly. “I have my reasons.” she shrugged slightly. “I may change my mind if I see you find yours.”

A light chuckle passed Elijah’s lips as he began walking down the pathway they stopped in moments before. “I wouldn’t hold your breath.”

There were several more conversations similar to that between them. But no matter how many times each of them brought it up, they both believed that they didn’t want to know who their soulmate was. They were content with their lives and it avoided the disappointment if their soulmates were human and lost some time ago. This way, there wouldn’t be heartache.

_____

“Elijah?” Y/N called out as she struggled to keep herself steady as she walked into the compound. She hadn’t ever expected to go to Elijah when she had been injured. But she needed help this time. Someone had attempted to shoot a wooden bullet at her and it was currently lodged in her back.

In a blink of an eye, Elijah was in front of her taking in her appearance. His eyes had widened as he helped her over to a seat in the courtyard. “What happened.” He asked as he took note of the current bullet holes in her shirt.

“Oh you know, failed attempt at making friends.” She tried to brush off the pain that was currently radiating through her. “ I just need you to help take one of them out. The others were easy to do. But this one is lodged in there.”

Elijah moved behind her as came to take note of where she had been speaking about. There had been a tear in her shirt from the attempt to make the bullet hole bigger to get the wooden bullet out. He could see the healed spots from the others that she had been able to take out.

It was as he moved the fabric aside to begin pulling the bullet out that he noticed the mark right above it. He stopped for a moment as he took in the horizontal circles that were intertwined. For as many times as he had seen his own mark, it was replicated on Y/N’s skin.

Y/N could feel how he hesitated; she looked over her shoulder at him. “What is it?”

Elijah shook his head slightly. “I believe that is the first time I’ve seen your mark.” He said before he began to poke and prod at the bullet hole.

She hissed as she felt him digging into her skin and muscle. “There’s a first for everything.”

Y/N knew that while they had joked and pressed the other to go in search of their soulmates, they never once actually saw each other’s mark. For the century and a half that she had known Elijah, she had never once seen Elijah’s mark, just as he hadn’t seen hers until this moment.

Elijah hadn’t said anything in response. If anything he was letting his mind go over everything the last several centuries had shown him. He had been at his lowest, the lowest that he could be as a Vampire, when Y/N had entered his life. They had gotten along so well during that time that Elijah just considered it them having a lot in common.

“I take it now that you’ve seen it, you’re going to go on a mission to find my soulmate for me?” She asked a moment later, hoping to fill the air with voices instead of the sound of blood and muscle being messed with.

“I thought you disagreed with that plan.” Elijah tried to keep his voice normal as he talked with her.

As much as seeing the mark should have made him happy, that he should have stopped right then and there and told her what it was that he realized, he couldn’t bring himself to do it. It had nothing to do with the bullet that he was now pulling out from her back. If that had been the case, he’d tell her the moment he watched her skin begin to heal before his eyes.

“Oh, I do.” Said with a nod as rolled her shoulders, stretching out the muscles of her back where the bullet had been moments before. “That doesn’t mean it will stop you from doing it.”

Her words had caused him to chuckle as he pulled out his handkerchief and began cleaning his hands of her blood. She turned towards him in her seat, watching as he tossed the bullet onto the table a moment later.

“I have no intentions of seeking someone out that you do not wish to meet.” He noted with a nod of his head as he looked over at her. Even after getting into some trouble, she still looked as if she could still take on the world.

There was something in her eyes that changed a moment after his words had pierced the air. “Would you tell me if you saw the mark on someone else?”

“Of course.” He said even though it had been a lie. He knew he wasn’t going to speak of the very mark that was on his chest.

As much as Elijah wanted to express every thought he was having at the moment, he couldn’t allow himself too. Not with the past that he had. Not when there were multiple reasons why he didn’t want her to know.

Not to mention the track record he had with the women in his life. While one would argue that it was all meant to lead up to him meeting Y/N, Elijah knew that even she wasn’t immune to the darkest parts of his family or even himself.

He watched as she stood up from her seat. “Thank you for helping me with that.” She gestured to the bullet. “Would I be able to interest you in a little night hunt?”

There was a smirk pulling at her lips, one that Elijah couldn’t stop one from forming on his own. She was offering him a night of catching those that attempted to harm her. Between the two of them, the sport of keeping each other and his family had been a game of keeping score. His head nodded in agreement at the thought of helping her.

He always promised to help keep her safe. And it was as they began leaving the compound that Elijah realized in order to do so, he was going to have to keep his mark hidden from her.

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[young-dumb-and-vaccinated]

The Sommelier (Hannigram x Female!Reader) pt. 15

Hannibal gives y/n an idea and y/n negotiates.

@viviace @deadman-inc-bikeshop @dovahdokren

Trigger warnings: graphic descriptions of violence

Aftercare was Hannibal's favorite part of the evening. He loved to spend long, indulgent hours pampering his darlings. But usually, there was only one. And that was Will. And Hannibal's clawfoot bathtub, although beautiful, was not big enough for both of you at the same time. Meaning, you had to take turns.

You and Will argued back and forth about who was in more desperate need of aftercare; each advocating for the other, of course. That was Hannibal's fault, really. He should have known better than to ask you to make a decision.

Hannibal emerged from the bathroom, sleeves rolled up and arms soaked to the elbow. "Who is first?"

Before you could speak, Will shoved you forward. "She is."

Hannibal knew better than to let the argument go on, and so did you. You followed him into the bathroom, the smell of lavender bath salts filling the air.

He removed your fluffy robe and watched you step into the warm bath. The water was just hot enough to soothe the aches in your muscles. Hannibal took his seat at the end of the tub where you rested your head. You leaned back and submerged your whole body. 

“You have such soft hair.” Hannibal said, pouring a bit of expensive-smelling shampoo in his palm. 

“Thanks, I use fabric softener and tumble dry it on low heat.” You answered. 

“You have a hard time accepting compliments, don’t you?” He probed, beginning to lather the shampoo into your hair. “Between that and the self-deprecation, I’d say you suffer from low self-esteem.” 

You felt yourself melting into him. The hypnotic motions of his hands chipped away at your defenses. “Is that really that surprising?” 

“For such an intelligent, sophisticated young beauty?” Hannibal chuckled. “I am surprised you don’t understand your worth.” 

“If it makes you feel any better,” You offered. “The fact that a psychotic cokehead fundamentalist Christian cult leader wants me dead tells me I’m doing something right.” 

“You are a force of nature, my indulgence.” Hannibal assured you, still massaging your head. “But you don’t need me to tell you that. You already know your power.” 

That got you thinking. Would it be so bad to just find a hunting rifle and blow Chase Mulvaney’s head off? What was stopping you? It certainly wasn’t your conscious. All your remaining moral fiber had been ripped to shreds over the course of the last month. 

“Tell me something about yourself, Hannibal.” You said, leaning back.

“What would you like to know?” He asked, retracting his hands. He cupped his hands in the water and poured some over your hair. 

“Do you ever think about morality?” You said, bluntly. 

The question pleasantly surprised him. “Quite a bit, actually. I like to think of myself as a student of philosophy, which deals heavily with the subject of ethics, human behavior, and yes, morality.” 

“Do you believe morality is subjective?” you tilted your head. 

“There’s not a doubt in my mind about it.” Hannibal smiled. “Those who think otherwise usually exemplify some of the best arguments for subjective morality.” 

“Religious nuts like Chase Mulvaney.” You said. “He and millions of others believe in objective morality, but can’t even keep it consistent among themselves.” 

“Darling,” Hannibal whispered. “You don’t have to wait for aftercare to talk philosophy with me. I would be happy to do so anytime.” 

You spent a half hour in the bath, Hannibal stroking, kissing and cuddling you. As much as you wanted to enjoy the affection, your mind was elsewhere. Perhaps it was just a hyperfixation, or post-multiple-orgasm clarity, but the only thought in your head was that Chase Mulvaney had to die. 

Your train of thought was chugging along smoothly until it was derailed by the violent buzzing of your phone against the tile floor. You leaned over the side of the tub, trying to make out the contact name from across the room. 

Hannibal dried his hands on a nearby towel and picked the phone up from the ground. 

“Who is it?” You asked. 

“This number is logged into your phone as just a picture of a...red demon?” Hannibal answered. 

“Oh, yeah.” You dropped your head. “I’ll call her back, just let it ring out.” 

“Who’s the demon?” Hannibal chuckled. 

You stepped out of the bathtub and reached for a towel. “Just somebody I know from work. Probably calling about covering a shift or something.” 

“Would that be the same person who believed I was the devil?” Hannibal raised an eyebrow, watching you wrap the towel around yourself.

You were about to say yes, but caught yourself. “No. Just some lady I work with who always refused to share her tips with the buses. Super entitled, total pain in the ass. I’ve been looking for an excuse to tell her off.” 

“Well, we can’t keep you from that, now can we.” Hannibal cupped your cheek in his hand and looked at your face admiringly. “There should be a clean nightgown for you on the bed. Please tell Will I’ll be ready for him in a couple minutes.” 

“Wow, you really did think of everything.” You rocked back on your heels and swung to your tip toes to give him a kiss on the cheek. “I’ll let him know.” 

He kissed you back. “Thank you, my indulgence.” 

“Just one more thing.” You stopped in the threshold. “Could I please use your computer?” 

“I don’t see why not.” Hannibal looked up from the quickly draining tub. “By all means, what’s mine is yours.” 

You smiled and blew him a kiss before absconding into the bedroom. 

The nightgown he’d laid out for you had far more ruffles and lace than you’d consider appropriate for sleepwear, but it was comfortable and fit you well. 

You passed the message along to Will, but hurriedly. You were in a rush to be alone. You had some business to attend to.

You sat at Hannibal's desk, turned on his lamp and logged into your google drive on his computer. While you waited for the content to fully load, you scrolled through your contacts. When you found the demon, you pressed the green dial button.

It didn't take her long to pick up. "[F/N]! Finally, I've been trying to call you all night."

"Yeah, I know." You rolled your eyes. "Some of us have lives to live. Not that you'd know anything about that."

"No need to be snippy." She scolded. "I have an offer for you."

"If it doesn't involve a portion of ad revenue, I'm not interested." You shook your head. "I'm not settling for a flat fee while you make the real money off my experience. My goddamn trauma."

"Sounds like we woke up and chose bitchy today." She teased. "You're not even going to hear me out?"

"Freddie," you began, pulling up a document on the computer. "I happen to have a four-page, comprehensive statement of what happened that night right here. Half of it was cut out for the FBI report."

You could practically hear Freddie drooling already. "And?"

"I won't accept anything under $1200 for it." You finished. "Or 30% of all ad revenue on this article."

"That's not fair." She protested. "Best I can do is $750."

"You made ten times that off my first article." You leaned back in the chair. "Don't try to lowball me, Lounds, I can do this all night."

"Since when were you the assertive type?" She asked, deflecting the conversation.

"Remember when you told me my fifteen minutes of fame was running out and you were my only option to get my story out there?" You recalled.

"At the time, I was right." Freddie contested.

"That was before Chase went from a cokehead to a domestic terrorist." You said. "Now I actually can take it to a more reputable outlet."

"But here you are anyway." She said. "Extorting a small, woman-owned independent news site just for the hell of it. I've got bills to pay, y'know."

"With gaslighting like that, I'm sure they're astronomical." You rolled your eyes. Sighing, you propped your knees against the desk. "Look, I don't hate you, Freddie."

"I don't hate you either." She agreed. "I thought trashing each other was just our mutual love language."

"The only reason I'm considering TattleCrime at all is you." You admitted. "You're loud and unapologetic and it makes people listen to you. I need someone who can take the heat."

"Because you know that mainstream news outlets are going to cut your writing down to maintain the status quo." Freddie finished your thought.

You pursed your lips. "Exactly. You're the only one who's got the cajones to run the whole story."

"I'm flattered." She said, then paused. "If I move some things around, I can probably get you $1000."

You opened a new tab and typed some words into the search bar. You scrolled through the results, leaving Freddie without an answer.

"Hello?" She said. "[F/N]? Did I lose you?"

"How soon can you pay?" You asked.

Your phone buzzed. You had a notification from paypal. A thousand dollars from Fredrica Lounds.

"Right fucking now." She answered.

"You've got yourself a deal." You said, firmly. You typed out Freddie's email address and pushed send. "It's all yours."

[coweydoesdrawing]

This is not going to be a fun post. I’m going to be sharing something VERY personal. But it needs to be said.

TW: DISCUSSION OF ABUSE, MANIPULATION, AND POTENTIAL GROOMING

I was abused by someone in the Markiplier fandom.

To some of you, this is of no surprise.

If you know me well enough, you know of my previous “best friend”, who stopped speaking with me a few months ago.

What you may not have known, is that this “best friend” of mine (user @/tentacleheadcold) is an adult. An adult in his mid-twenties.

I am a minor.

When I first started speaking to him, he disclosed his age upfront, and I didn’t mind because I felt I was “mature enough” to be friends with him. I never gave it a second thought.

However, looking back on it, I realize that the way he treated me was…Not the proper way for an adult to treat a child. We became fast friends. Close friends. We confided in each other. I considered him a best friend long before he considered me one, and I blame my attachment issues for that.

But he did some really terrible, horrible shit.

He forced me to push all my friends away - judging them harshly, making me feel as if they didn’t deserve me, like he was the only one that truly cared for me.

He was obsessive - texting me daily, and becoming “concerned” when I didn’t text back in time (aka spam texting me when I didn’t respond in a matter of hours).

He was manipulative - using his mental health as some sort of anchor to keep me attached to him, threatening his own life multiple times, to the point that even joking about it made me worried for his safety.

He used me as a therapist. Constantly. I was the one that he came to with all his problems. When I didn’t know how to solve something, it ended in a fight.

The fights were the worst. He made me feel so horrible, like I was useless, like I couldn’t do anything right, simply because I didn’t know how to help him.

He complained about how nobody would listen to him, about how nobody truly loved him, while I was desperately proclaiming my love for him daily.

Whenever I made a mistake - such as mentioning a potentially triggering topic without truly understanding it’s effects - he would bash me for it. He would say that he didn’t believe I cared for him, that if I truly knew and understood him, I wouldn’t have hurt him at all.

He always took his words back in the end. But they still left me scarred.

He tore my mental health apart. I pushed everyone away. I only spoke to him, and the group of friends he “approved”. If I made a mistake, I would beat myself up over it for days, weeks, months, even.

I couldn’t stand being in a relationship, because it felt like a betrayal to him. Despite the fact that we weren’t romantically involved - and he claimed he had no interest in me in that way - I felt as if we were. Like going out with someone was somehow going to destroy our friendship. Like I would lose him if I tried to be with anyone else.

That’s not even mentioning the NSFW roleplay we participated in as Dark and Wilford, which went into explicit detail. Like, horribly explicit detail. Though prompts like that originated from my own somewhat NSFW headcanons, I still don’t think it was okay to write about those things with an adult. I feel as though he should have stopped it at the source, but instead, he knew that he was doing wrong and continued anyway - he even went as far as to beg my friends not to report him to the police.

Eventually we grew apart.

I became interested in someone, I found a lovely partner whom I spent a lot of time with, and that - mixed with the horrific toll he had on my mental health - forced me to stop talking with him as much as I did previously. That made him very angry.

The messages escalated from “I’m worried about you because we haven’t talked in a while” to “You don’t love me, you don’t care about me, if you cared about me you would talk to me” (paraphrasing, I don’t have the old messages, otherwise I would quote directly). When I asked for a break from these messages, and a break from talking with him in general, he hated that even more. A short break from chatting was to insulting to him.

He blocked me only a day or so after agreeing to give me the space I needed. Then, he posted all over his social media about how I was the bad guy for breaking his heart and “using” him. I was to scared to stand up for myself.

I am no longer scared.

I write this post as a warning.

I don’t want anyone going through what I went through.

I don’t want to see that man interact with a minor ever again.

I don’t know exactly what he’s up to, but I do know that he has a new Wilford to interact with on his roleplay account (fromthedeskof-darkiplier) who may or may not be a minor.

If you are a minor reading this, and you are friends or mutuals with him, please, for your own safety, do not interact.

If anyone is aware of any “friends” of his that are minors, please keep them as far away from him as possible.

I don’t want anyone else getting hurt.

Thank you for reading, I hope you understand.