#as much this past year
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i have notifications on for when you post but every time i see the notification pop up my immediate response is to think you are tumblr user/twitch streamer aimseytv
is it bc we're both short /J /SILLY kjdfjdf im honoured to be confused for them i love that guy
#ask#i need 2 watch them more.. my firefox twitch time tracker extention (i dont get paid to talk abt firefox but i really should)#oh mymgod i had to edit that tag and i thought i ciopied it but apparently i ddint cuz i copypasted mt entire psych assignment in here LMAO#ANYWAY WHAT I WWAS SAYING. i have spent 16total hours watching them according to my silly little twitch tracker#which is both lower and higher than i thought#my highest ones are ummmEmbarassing . especially considering ive onlyt had it for a year and i havent watched twitch streams nearly#as much this past year
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I think so many people are so deeply alienated from themselves that they have no clue how to exercise their free will and autonomy. For some, this alienation runs so deep that they are afraid of their own autonomy and humanity. It is completely understandable why one would have those feelings, but it can be worrisome.
I want to help others who feel this way, so here are small things I have done to exercise my free will:
Add "guilty pleasure" songs to playlists and actually listen to them (I have a ton of late 1990s-early 2000s music I listen to now proudly that I never listened to in the past out of shame)
Getting the décor item, bath set, bed spread, ect. in the patterns you like, even if it's "childish" (I got a dinosaur-themed wastebasket from the kids' décor section and I adore it)
Taking a new route to get to a place you go to often
Eat dessert first
Celebrate well, and often
Collect things that are "odd" or don't seem like an "acceptable" thing to collect (somebody on my "for you" page collects dandelion crayola crayons and it was so cool!!!!!!)
Incorporate one new piece in an outfit you wear frequently (e.g., a new chain, a necklace, ribbons, bracelets, ect.). Challenge yourself to add onto the outfits if you feel up for it.
Sing along to songs without worrying that you sound "good" or your intonation is completely accurate
Read a book from a genre you weren't allowed to read as a kid (comics, thrillers, mysteries, anything!)
Walk without having a specific destination or goal
Pick up a new craft without expecting yourself to master it or to ever be "good" enough. Get your hands messy.
I don't want to shame anybody for not feeling as though they have free will or that they are exempt from exercising it. However, I wanted to give ideas so that you might read this list and find your own ways to express your intrinsic autonomy and will. You deserve to be a person, to feel alive, not just living. That is what our lives are for.
#mental health#mental health support#positivity#if anybody has ideas of their own definitely include them!#i just think being stuck with this feeling that you don't have autonomy and that you ultimately aren't an equal person or a person at all..#...in comparison to other people can be a really troubling and dangerous place to be in...#...and that isn't the person's fault for feeling that way. they didn't pluck those thoughts out of thin air...#...like i have felt that exact way all my LIFE because i have been abused for. probably 2/3s of my life...#...only within these past few years have i even FELT alive. frankly it's going to take a while to repair what i have been left with...#...so i know the feeling and i want to help others feel even a LITTLE bit alive. you deserve it...#...you deserve to take in a deep breath before slowly realizing 'oh my gd this is what it feels like to be alive' and SMILE about it#i want that for you even if it is brief. even if it is small. even if it is a whisper. i want you to feel alive#unironically getting rid of the idea of 'guilty pleasures' has made my life SO much better
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Toothpaste companies must really hate people who are allergic to mint toothpaste, which a lot of people are! Apparently it's NOT supposed to burn like minty hellfire? (I'm fine with mint candy, it's only mint toothpaste that hurts)
I've been using Tom's fennel for years, but am now trying to find one with fluoride in it, and finding a toothpaste that is no mint and yes fluoride should not be such a huge and infuriating quest. still got some more grocery stores to search, but not even the children's toothpaste in the nearest one had any that were suitable.
Edit: Hey you don't need to keep copying out the tags, I wrote all the Minty Hellfire lyrics here. And then someone recorded them here.
Also, I think it might technically be a sensitivity rather than an allergy, but whatever it is, toothpaste is not supposed to hurt! If it's burning then that's bad and you should try to find a new one if possible!
#LIKE FIIIIRE! HELLFIIIIIRE! THIS FIRE ON MY TONGUE!#I therefooooore requiiiire a new paste tooooo cleeaaan gums#It's not my fault! I'm not to blame! it is the Colgate brand and Crest who've set this flame!#it's not my fault‚ if in their plans‚ they made the toothpaste so much stronger than a maaaaaaannnnnn#protect me‚ oh grocers! don't let the menthol touch my lips‚ don't let its fire sear my mouth and gums!#PROVIDE ME WITH FLUORIDE‚ but not mixed with the fires of Hell‚ and I'll keep all my teeth for years to cooooommeeee#HELLFIRE#MINT FIRE#IS ALL THAT I CAN FIND!#I may be! requiired! to order paaaaste oooonline!
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oc lineup for artfight 2024
#digital art#oc#art#oc art#main ocs taking a break cause they got so much love in years past#character design#ref sheet#doodle#artfight#artfight 2024
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pls assume i'm thinking about this moment 24/7 all week every week
#ahsjgdh i love the young xianle quartet sm they're almost barely not traumatized...kinda#they're very silly especially in retrospect#aaa i do also really want to draw young xie lian and mu qing but the idea of rendering that much gold detailing sounds like hell ywy#i'll do it but christ alive#my art#fanart#tgcf#tgcf fanart#tgcf spoilers#technically#also i haven't read past book 3 for now ywy#tian guan ci fu#heaven official's blessing#feng xin#hua cheng#...he gets one tag bc i'm not keeping track of all the aliases#every time i draw hc his hair gets worse and worse#my man has not seen a hairbrush in the past 800 or so years of his existence
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Doing this bc I’m scared to and won’t on my own
if this gets 5k notes by October 20th, I will tell my dad about my eating disorder and get help to recover + therapist
Rules:
No spamming
5 notes per person including likes
if either one of those is broken, I’m reducing the time limit, basically making it less likely to hit the goal on time
FOR CRYING OUT LOUD PLEASE STOP SPAMMING
tagging is okay
Might delete later(sorry!) because I’m scarrredddd, I don’t wanna tell my dad >:l
#Basically I’ve been trying for the past two weeks to recover on my own without having to tell anyone about it and bro I just cant#Jsbsjdhd#It will only be a temporary recovery though heads up#Because I’m not going to get away with this eating disorder for much longer#I’m going to get found out so this is just temporary until I’m an adult#Once I’m an adult I won’t have to worry about getting caught 😌#Ahhh I’ve had this disorder for like a year now I’m sick of it 😭#Okay maybe not temporary#Actually I wouldn’t mind recovering for good actually this sucks#Notes game#note game
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i can't wait to be 30+ and still in fandom and i can't wait to be 40+ and still in fandom and i can't wait to be 50+ and still in fandom and i can't wait to be 60+ and still in fandom and i can't wait to be 70+ and still in fandom and i can't wait to be 80+ and still in fandom and i can't wait to be 90+ and still in fandom and i can't wait to look back on my life and know that i loved things deeply and passionately and was inspired to create and was part of communities with incredible people from all over the world brought together by the stories that touched us
#and still be mad at shithead executives for unfairly cancelling my pirate show#also imagine what my ao3 word count will be like. gonna be writing my little fics in the nursing home#sometimes when i get frustrated over my writing i have to remember that i've only been doing it for a little over a year#and not in my native language#there is still so much time and so much to learn and try and discover and explore and i am EXCITED#there is something so ancient and beautiful about humans being brought together by stories#storytelling is what humans have always done and will always do and what will always connect us#to our past to the future to each other#sorry for the 1 am ramblings#fandom#🐭📓
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🌱✂️ (crop from this month's patreon piece)
twitter | ig | inprnt | patreon | store
#thanks to everyone who's supported me there over the past couple of years#i know i haven't posted much publicly#most of what i've done lately is only on there bc it's either hard to crop and share nicely#or it's just sketches#the past 2ish years have been the worst of my life so unfortunately that translates also to less art to share
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out of the frying pan and into the fire and into another frying pan that's also on fire
[id in alt text]
#dungeon meshi#dungeon meshi spoilers#dunmeshi#this past year i decided to get into some of the manga i hear people really rave about#and dunmeshi was the first one i read and i adore it so much i don't have the words#gosh ryoko kui is such a huge inspiration.. i hope i can save up and get physical copies of the manga some day#ohh and daydream hour if it ever releases in english...#and sorry toshiro doesn't have his armor. i always remember him in his disheveled casual arc#fan art#my art#i think i've just completely stopped trying to do a clean flat style... i've just started painting over my sketches now#it looks a little messy but it's so much more fun#this was the first time in awhile i looked forward to continuing a drawing
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the new jjk cafe fits have been living in my head . no thoughts except yuuji in a letterman
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#itafushi#fushiita#yuji itadori#fushiguro megumi#megumi fushiguro#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#havent had yuuji fight me this hard in a MINUTE omg far left took forever i redrew his face and hair like 10 times minimum#he looks good now but like rly yuuji i thought we were past this i thought we were cool :((((#i put Hand On Thigh and this is how u repay me.....#sighs#whatever this took a million years longer than it should but im finally happy with it im finally done ths all that matters#i dont know what yuuji's pants look like in the official art but i ripped them as a treat fr me :)#ik theyre probably just regular jeans but i think yuuji deserves to show a lil knee#real talk tho yuuji's fit is so so good i love it so much. megumi i am ehhhhhh but it's on brand fr him#plus i like that they dress him like he's canonically cold all the time lmao yuuji in a light sweater n megumi in a thermal and puffer coat#its what they deserve
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It's "bully Azul" time !!
(Og post here)
#(it pained me so much to draw Azul in the ugly Subway uniform)#you know#the more I think about it the more I realize I didn't grow past the 4 year old phase of bullying the kid you like#what do you mean 'I can't put snails on their head'?#how am I supposed to get their attention otherwise ?#that's me with my blorbos#I'm actually a 4 year old kid cosplaying as an adult#mello's drawings#twisted wonderland#twst#jamil viper#azul ashengrotto#twst mc#twst yuu#meme redraw#azujami#jamiazu#ashenviper#art#my art#oc x canon
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2.12 Chimney Begins - 2.09 Hen Begins - 2.16 Bobby Begins Again - 7.04 Buck, Bothered and Bewildered
Tommy's family arc
#911#911edit#911 abc#911 show#911 spoilers#911 season 7#tommy kinard#evan buckley#evan 'buck' buckley#kinley#bucktommy#kinkley#tevan#pick a ship name you guys and thanks for picking tevan the most correct name#anyway analysis time!#looking back with Modern Knowledge tm about why tommy acts the way he does in the past... babygirl you were so closeted I'm so proud#babygirl was back there getting into narnia#he was so resistant to letting go of the pseudo-family he'd found at the 118 in chimney begins#even tho it was a good old boys club that he knew he really didn't fit into he was making himself fit because at least it was something#but then he let chimney in and then hen came around and he saw a very queer person being openly queer and not giving a fuck what they think#and I think his behavior in that episode was trying to support hen as much as he could without outing himself#because like. how do you give up years of relative safety with people who do care about you they just won't like you anymore if you're *you#then he meets buck in s7 which is like 10-20 years later timeline is fake and he's like oh. this is what unconditional family is#and he's like oh. maybe I can come back. maybe I can be part of this again somehow. maybe we've both grown enough#or at the very least he'll be close to something he never believed would really happen for him#rant over tevan my beloved tim minear pillow cold both sides god bless#my edits
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Council of lovefools.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#jiang yanli#jiang cheng#They don't have an actual sleepover in this scene but the vibes were so sleepover coded...I had to get them cozied up.#Late night talks with friends and family are some of the best conversations.#My siblings and I used to have room sleepovers with each other (Actually an excuse to stay up and talk about runescape)#Currently my flatmates and I also have really great heart to hearts late into the night.#Pondering shit like 'What defines confidence?“ and ”Why are people terrified of letting themselves fall in love?"#All that aside; There is a really great conversation between JC and WWX here. They are so close and yet so far way from each other!#Fundamentally they *agree* about many things - but JC now has to play the role of someone more 'mature'.#His temper is reigned in and he had to take a more nuanced approach. Whereas WWX can be far more reactionary.#JC has changed to become someone more mature (or at least he is trying).#Contrast this attitude with the scene *right* after where WWX literally goes baby mode with JYL. Rolling around going “I'm Fwee years old”.#When children are hurt we comfort them with hugs and warm food and a laugh. It's not enough when you're an adult. It's not simple anymore.#WWX is stuck in the past when everyone else is shifting and moving on! It's a depression allegory (and just...actual depression)#But we also get to see how some things have stayed the same. They still bicker about soup. They still tease. They are still together.#They all care for each other very much but they are struggling against trauma and are not equipped to talk about it.#You can't really blame WWX for being so protective over JYL. But JC is right: “You don't have a say in who she likes.”#It may have started as an arranged marriage but *she* is *choosing* what her heart wants. JC sees that. WWX cannot.#The final act of love is letting go after all.
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They cured my art block <33
#shuggy#shanks x buggy#one piece#seriously I've had so much trouble enjoying drawing for the past ~7 years#idk how long this will carry on but I'm enjoying it while i can#betamins#fanartsu
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au where pit’s a trans girl who hasn’t figured it out yet and then the mirror of truth speedruns dp’s transition. and nothing else changes.
#kid icarus#kid icarus uprising#kiu#pit#dark pit#pittoo#pandora ki#palutena#fanart#sketch#comic#this based on my headcanon that the mirror of truth is gender affirming#which means i very much believe that pit is not transfem in canon. but BOY would it be funny if he were#the mirror of truth transing dp's gender is like trying to copy/paste an egg and ending up with a full-grown chicken#anyway. dp gets the magical miracle Instant HRT but pit has to do it the slow way. sad. many such cases each year
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hello cookierun nation here are all of the cookie cosplays i humbly offer to ye that ive done so far. love those lil dudes
#my cosplay#cookie run#cookie run kingdom#crk#cosplay#cookie run cosplay#i'd kiss the character designer for cookierun square on the lips they do such a good job of understanding the fundamentals of design#i mean obviously im not doing 1:1 translations on any of these but they provide a spectacular base from the official work#the fact that cookierun is the only series ive done multiple costumes for in the past few years#hopefully shows how fond i am of their design style#although to be fair the other series that ive done 2 costumes for lately is genshin impact and not to be negative#but i cannot stand genshin impacts character design approach it literally keeps me up at night how much i hate it
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