#as in recovery

[leadendeath]

positive But hints of previous bad things that happened and bad things that i made NOT happen

not gonna go into detail too much but the 29th is when i:

escaped one of the most horrible, soul-crushingly bad situations ive ever been through

got approved for medication (i asked for this one in particular after doing tons of research because generally side effects are so often fuckin awful. it was instant approval, on the day when i contacted my doctor, things were that bad. usually it takes weeks to get an appointment and i never go docs when i really should for anything, but it was either get help or disappear if you know what i mean, that's how bad it was at the time. no i wasn't brutally honest like that in the conversation lol i don't suggest doing that. didn't cry on the phone win! i did the "smile so your 'phone voice' sounds better" thing though... which mustve sounded really mentally ill of me in retrospect oh my god... my doc happens to be on the same thing as me so that was lucky and she's nice to me anyway :)

found out i have ocd and started the process of getting better.

ive come a very long way and recovery isn’t linear. i truly know what that means now. but i am turning into who i want to be. and that’s something to commemorate.

it’s kinda awesome that this date coincides with me taking myself on vacation. funny how things play out innit

[gentleaffirmations]

Even if you were a difficult child, you didn't deserve to be hurt.

[compassionatereminders]

It's a lot healthier to go for a daily walk than to sign up for a gym membership you won't be using because you hate that kind of exercise. It's a lot healthier to eat a frozen meal than to skip a meal because you were too tired to cook something healthy. It's a lot healthier to take a quick shower than to procrastinate an elaborate routine for days. Don't aim so high that you won't be hitting anything!

[lotuspositivity]

You don't have to force yourself to bounce back so quickly. I read something recently that said "when you come in from a rainstorm, you don't expect yourself to be dry and warm right away", and it really resonated with me. It's okay to take time to dry off and warm up. Take the time you need to process what happened to you.

[worthless-mess]

"Are you ok?" I'm actually tired bro. From the bottom of my heart I'm tired

[recomvery]

One of the most dangerous things in the world is not being able to say no to people because you don't want to upset them or dissapoint them. This will completely ruin your life in every way possible, at work, in your private life, your sex life and your friendships. It's a way of removing your own consent in your own decisions and go against your wishes, it is always a crime against yourself. Let yourself have a say. Upsetting people is better than traumatizing yourself.

[ilikeit-art]

Have you ever wondered how tech technicians recover data from faulty flash and memory whose data cannot be recovered by normal methods.

[recoverr]

i don't know who needs to hear this, but guilt, self-hatred and shame are not sustainable sources of growth and healing. you can't hate yourself into feeling better, or being better. you can't repeatedly punish yourself for your flawed humanity and expect wholesome results.

[chronicsymptomsyndrome]

*displays textbook symptomatic behavior of my own disorder that I am well educated on* what’s my deal why am I like this

[curingourhearts]

It's okay to 'grieve' things that aren't just death. I've allowed myself to grieve a friendship ending, a situationship, losing something important to me, etc. It's okay to give yourself time to process the loss of something. Grief looks different for everyone, try to find a way that works for you to help make it easier for you.

[ed-recoverry]

I love you everyone in red states right now.

I love you everyone who has family that is/will celebrate a Trump victory.

I love you everyone surrounded by loved ones actively voting against your rights.

If you voted for Kamala, you did everything you could and you should be proud.

All of your frustration and anger is justified, understandable, and fair.

I’m sending you all love and peace.

[compassionatereminders]

"No one remembered my birthday-" Well, but did YOU tell anyone it was coming up and you wanted to celebrate it with them?

"I wish someone would see through it when I tell people I'm fine-" Well, but have YOU considered not lying when people ask you how you're doing?

"I am so resentful of my friend because they keep doing this thing that really bothers me-" Well, but have YOU directly communicated that the thing is bothering you?

"I am burning out because my friend keeps expecting me to help them with serious struggles-" Well, but have YOU tried to establish the boundaries you need to feel okay?

"No one ever asks me about this thing I really care about-" Well, but have YOU brought it up yourself?

"I miss my friend but they haven't texted me-" Well, but have YOU been reaching out to them?

Sometimes people are mean, uncaring assholes, in which case you get to be mad. But sometimes you just need to communicate better. Try communication before you assume someone doesn't care!

[felineandhustle]

[worthless-mess]

"You’re so polite" thanks i was raised in constant fear of upsetting people.

[recomvery]

It's ok to want money. It's ok to be upset that you're poor and wishing to be rich. I understand. People who say that money doesn't buy happiness have never eaten pasta every day because it's 50 cents at the grocery store or been short on money for christmas presents. Constantly scraping by makes people miserable and depressed and of course you're gonna dream about money, about being happy and priviledged. That's not greedy or horrible, that's life. It's ok.