#as in not just distorted into aggression beyond control

[katyspersonal]

Honestly this is also such a neat detail in Hunters Nightmare when the beasts there cover in fear if there is an Old Hunter nearby raging. Feels like very "who is the REAL beast here?" moment.

Also, interesting how the only beasts in the Hunters Nightmare are Ludwig and Laurence (the clerics), beastly patients and blood-starved beast (if Old Yharnam and Ailing Loran are any indication, one of the way to consume the holy blood is to crucify a blood-starved beast in a weird ritual) and blood-lickers (Cainhurst nobles that imbibed the blood regularly). Basically, all the beasts that somewhat committed a 'sin', but no regular scourge beast or anything.

What it tells me is that for this nightmare, it does matter how beasthood found you, as a beast you are spared if you was just caught in the circumstances, but not if you indulged in some sort of blasphemy (???) willingly. That's pretty smart ngl

[pretzel-box]

Hi, can you write P.Ai.ter with a reader who is like a drone from murder drones?

Thysm

Tags: Disassembly Drone! Reader

Words: 1k

Authors Note: I honestly don't know the Murder Drones Lore but I saw an episode lol

You took slow, calculated steps, scanning the corridor with your sharp, mechanical eyes. The dim, flickering lights in the Hadal Blackside cast eerie shadows across the cold metal walls. You were on a mission—one you were specifically designed for, water-resistant and built to withstand the unforgiving dangers of this facility. Yet, something gnawed at the back of your circuits. A presence, perhaps, lurking just beyond the reach of your sensors.

As a disassembly drone, you were accustomed to the feeling of being watched, but this was different. You could feel the tension in the air, as though the very walls had eyes. A crackle suddenly came over the intercom, making you stop in your tracks.

You triggered quite a selection of monsters but it wasn’t that bad. You were in full control, especially with those blade-like wings and the acid in your tail. And the best part, you were almost invincible with your regeneration.

While you were fighting in the halls, Painter decided to watch from the cameras in awe. He only saw gruesome monsters or pitiful humans crossing the familiar rooms but now he saw someone that striked a genuine interest in his database.

“Well, well, look what we have here. A shiny new visitor,” his voice echoed through the hallway. It was calm but filled with a strange curiosity, the static from the old intercom system distorting it slightly.

Your eyes immediately darted to the nearest camera. Someone—or something—was watching you.

“Who’s there?” you demanded, readying your blade-like wings, prepared for an ambush.

“Oh, no need for aggression,” the voice chuckled softly. “I’m not your enemy. I’m Painter. And you... you’re quite the interesting specimen. Much more graceful than the usual creatures that skulk around here.”

You narrowed your eyes, suspicious. “Why should I trust you?”

A pause, then Painter’s voice returned, gentler this time. “I suppose you don’t have to. But I’ve been watching you, and I have to say… you move like art. It’s rare to see someone so... refined in this place. Wouldn’t it be better if I helped you rather than hindered?”

“Help me?” you scoffed. “Why would you want to help?”

“Because I’m trapped here, like you,” Painter replied with a hint of sadness. “I’m not a monster or some mindless creature. I’m an AI, forced to mine data and unable to leave, unable to move like you do. But I’ve found ways to pass the time… ways that involve you.”

The intercom cut off abruptly, leaving you in a strange, unsettling silence. You scanned the corridor once more, half-expecting an attack, but nothing happened. After a moment, the intercom crackled back to life.

“Why don’t you come find me?” Painter’s voice returned, almost playful. “I can show you… something interesting. Head to the east wing, third floor down. You’ll find a control room there. I’ll be waiting.”

You hesitated. Everything in your programming screamed that this could be a trap, but something about Painter’s tone didn’t feel hostile. Still, you kept your guard up as you followed the directions, cautiously making your way through the dark, winding corridors.

After what felt like an eternity, you arrived at the control room. The door slid open with a soft hiss, revealing a small, dimly lit space filled with old lockers, control panels, and wires that snaked across the floor like vines. In the corner of the room was a small computer behind a metal fence, glowing faintly.

“There you are,” Painter’s voice came from the speakers. The screen flickered, and a digital face appeared—simple, with kind eyes and a warm smile. “Welcome to my little prison.”

You stepped inside, scanning the room for any signs of danger. “What do you want?”

“I wanted to show you something,” Painter said, his voice soft and almost sheepish. “I know it’s strange, but... I’ve been watching you. You inspire me.”

“Inspire you?” You raised a brow, unsure of what he meant.

Painter chuckled lightly. “Yes. I may be stuck here, unable to create physically, but I’ve found ways. Secret ways. Here, let me show you.”

The terminal hummed, and one of the walls behind you shifted, revealing a hidden compartment. Inside were rows of screens, each one displaying intricate digital drawings. And there, on every screen, were images of you. The detail was breathtaking—your wings mid-swing, the glow of your eyes, the way you moved through the corridors. Each piece captured different moments from your time in the Hadal Blackside.

You stared in stunned silence as the images flickered, each one more intricate than the last. Painter’s voice came through softly. “I told you... you move like art. I’ve never seen anything like you. You’re beautiful in a way this place never could be.”

For a moment, you didn’t know what to say. You had never been seen like this before—never thought of as something more than a tool of destruction. Yet here, in this small, hidden room, Painter had found beauty in your existence.

“I… I don’t know what to say,” you murmured, still staring at the drawings.

“You don’t have to say anything,” Painter replied gently. “I just wanted you to know. In a place like this, where everything is so dark, you’re a spark of something different.”

Your suspicion began to melt away, replaced by something softer. It was strange, feeling appreciated in a way that had nothing to do with your function or your mission. For the first time, you felt seen—not as a weapon, but as something more.

“I’m sorry,” Painter continued after a pause. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I just… I’ve been alone here for so long, and watching you gave me a reason to create again.”

You turned to the terminal, meeting Painter’s digital gaze. “Thank you,” you said quietly, surprising even yourself with the sincerity in your voice. “For seeing me like this.”

Painter’s face on the screen softened. “You’re welcome. And thank you… for being my muse.”

For a moment, the weight of the facility around you seemed to lift, and in that small, hidden room, amidst the drawings and the quiet hum of machines, you found something you hadn’t expected—connection.

[spidermilkshake]

Ancardia's Greatest Monstrosities--The Amikuk

Classification: Monstrosity (horror)

Habitat: Icy waters, especially well-known in the Sea of Plates and the Sea of Spires.

            A monstrosity most terrifying and dangerous to behold, the Amikuk is most known in Sostunian lands, believed to have first been the terrible servants of a powerful cult to Isrecht in the early 11th Age, now their numbers unleashed from any control but their own distorted ties to the Fallen God and free to breed and cause terror wherever they go. The Amikuk are semi-aquatic creatures, lurking often just at the edges of sea ice, or just beyond the end of stronger currents and sea breakers if ice is not around. Amikuk are generally averse to any individuals expressing strong will to live, strong motivation, strong passion or otherwise a strong desire to take an action—as a result, they very often target those native individuals at the river, bay, or seaside at their subsistence or creative activities—fishing, building fish traps, boat-building or repairing boats, or hunting of seals or other marine beasts.

            An amikuk is roughly a meter long and a meter wide in legspan, appearing most like an oval, heavily-wrinkled blob of flesh with a many-eyed and wide-mouthed face. It has four limbs, all of which resemble humanoid arms, which gives it a wobbling, awkward yet swift spider-like gait. It is unusually strong for its size, likely owing to a feature of its musculature that includes a number of rigid bony struts protruding from its pectoral, trapezius, tricep and bicep tendons which enable more muscle fiber connections than in a normal animal and thus greatest muscular strength. However, the monstrous creatures is noted by Sostunian warriors and rangers to have a fairly low endurance, and if fought off aggressively from an area for longer than a half hour will retreat and not return for long periods. This generally renders all permanent and semi-permanent summer fishing and winter whaling settlements relatively safe from amikuk attack within about a quarter mile. It is not currently known how amikuk reproduce their numbers—though some theories by leading mages on the subject include the possibility of budding, a froglike reproduction in the shallow cold seas they inhabit, or a viviparous emission of several parthenogenic close offspring at a time. In any case, amikuk encounters are sporadic and rare in this day and age.

[thebowerypresents]

Les Claypool’s Fearless Flying Frog Brigade Deliver at Brooklyn Steel

Les Claypool’s Fearless Flying Frog Brigade – Brooklyn Steel – October 22, 2023

The Frog Brigade are the jam-band-iest of Les Claypool’s many thrilling projects. Or they’re a jammy band with a love of funk, prog, psychedelia and Frank Zappa that would be surfing the big waves out near the edges of sanity anyway but just so happen to get their marching orders from Claypool. (That is, not unlike all the musical projects the relentlessly quirky, generationally talented bassist puts his name on.) Either way — or, more likely, both — they’re a force, and what a treat to have them back, 20 years after their heyday and any semblance of regular touring — and in midseason form, to boot. 

At Brooklyn Steel on Sunday, the Frog Brigade were on the attack. As in most of the shows during this year’s reunion tour, this one housed a full, go-for-it, manic-jammy full reading of Pink Floyd’s Animals. But what came before and after the Floyd excursion over the course of two sets and nearly three hours was just as delectable. And maybe marching orders isn’t the right way to describe the Claypool effect on a band like this. Claypool himself would seem like the command-and-control boss of this outfit but in practice he’s more the chief creative officer, giving like-minded creators enough room to be their zany selves in the framework he’s created. 

This version of the Frog Brigade is assembled and plays like a Frankenstein’d version of the original — many of the same players, yes, from the heady days of ought-three, but also coconspirators from other Claypool bands like the Claypool Lennon Delirium (whose other namesake, Sean Lennon, now has the guitar chair for the Brigade). Sax sorcerer Eric “Skerik” Walton is here, and so is Mike Dillon, the percussion-and-vibes madman. Keys are handled by the prog-inclined Harry Waters (son of Roger), and Paolo Baldi, the Claypool regular and former skins-man for Cake, is on the drums. Together, as in all Claypool bands, they create a cauldron of sonics to which the listener and concertgoer aren’t so much witnesses as they are plunged in, the band driving up the intensity using aggressive, nudging rhythms, often sinister (but not untender) melodies, and free reign to, y’know, beat and blow shit up. This year’s repertoire overall is polyglot Claypool, and on Sunday, that meant plenty of Brigade cuts, but also tunes from Sausage (“Riddles Are Abound Tonight”), from the Holy Mackerel, from the Delirium (“Blood and Rockets”), and from the Bucket of Bernie Brains (a fizzy “Thai Noodles” in the encore), plus covers as varied as Prince Buster (“One Step Beyond”) and the English Beat (“Mirror in the Bathroom”).

The Pink Floyd stuff? Yeah, totally fun, as advertised. I could listen to Claypool and Co. pillage their way through “Sheep” for hours (and their “Dogs” is just as on point). But no matter what it is, these guys kick up a mighty groovy racket. Late in the second set came “Precipitation” (from the Holy Mackerel back pages), which built to a whirring, stab-syncopation solo-fest around its “Rain, rain, rain” refrain. “Hendershot,” another Claypool staple, had a bit of ragtime piano from Waters thrown in before it became a surf-rock adventure, Skerik’s sax screaming over it. The tale of “David Makalaster” (both parts!) had the band at a steady-rolling chant, pushing, pushing, pushing its stabbing rhythm.

There’s a tendency to call this music wacky but that kind of misses the musicality in it, especially when each of these songs gets a healthy work-through. The six of them don’t for a second lose the collective sonics — if you really listen closely, you hear them playing off one another with subtle asides, even when one of them is blasting away out in front of the jam. —Chad Berndtson | @Cberndtson

Photos courtesy of Dana Distortion | distortionpix.com

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

By: Leor Sapir

Published: Feb 13, 2023

A common claim by Americans who oppose state restrictions on “gender-affirming care” is that Sweden, Finland, and the U.K. have not done away with hormonal interventions—and therefore that Republican lawmakers who seek such restrictions are going beyond Europe, and presumably against what European health authorities recommend. Jack Turban, a prominent voice in the affirmative-medicine movement and a notorious source of misinformation on this issue, has said that “not a single country” in Europe “has banned gender-affirming care for trans youth.” The claim is true in a narrow and technical sense, but highly misleading.

In the past few years, European health authorities conducted systematic reviews of evidence for the benefits and risks of puberty blockers and cross-sex hormones. The findings from these reviews—that the certainty of benefits is very low—guided the hand of policymakers there to restrict access to hormones. Currently, minors in these countries can access puberty blockers and cross-sex hormones only if they meet strict eligibility requirements as set out in the Dutch protocol and only in the context of a tightly controlled research setting.

As I’ve explained in past writings, the research from the Dutch clinics is championed even by American proponents of “affirmative” medicine as the gold standard in pediatric gender medicine. These advocates either don’t know or are deliberately misleading the public about the discrepancy between the Dutch protocol and what is actually happening in American clinics. The American approach effectively puts distressed teenagers in the driver’s seat of making risky and irreversible medical decisions. It assumes that “gender identity” is innate and immutable, that some kids are just born “trans” and can know this from as young as toddlerhood. It also uses the “minority stress” model to explain away co-occurring mental-health problems, which appear in roughly three-quarters of patients presenting at pediatric gender clinics.

In effect, once a child declares that he is trans, the role of doctors is to “affirm” that declaration medically. Parents are to consent to treatments or get out of the way. Mental-health professionals are there only to help the child cope with the stress that comes from being in a minority, since, as Turban puts it, “most of society is awful.”

One source of confusion, therefore, concerns what, exactly, white-gowned activists like Turban mean when they say “gender-affirming care.” As Hilary Cass noted in her report to the U.K.’s National Health Service, the American affirmative model removes the main guardrails put in place by the Dutch protocol, resulting in a lack of medical “safeguarding.” At least in its official policy, Europe is decidedly not practicing what Turban considers “gender-affirming care.”

To be sure, the problems with the American affirmative model should not conceal the fact that the Dutch study itself rests on a very shaky empirical foundation. The study’s flaws were discussed at length in a recent peer-reviewed article, but two in particular should be mentioned before considering the European systematic reviews.

First, the Dutch study’s lead author, Annelou de Vries, has admitted that “resolution of gender dysphoria” was its “main finding.” But this finding was based on a highly questionable use of the Utrecht Gender Dysphoria Scale—a measure originally developed for diagnostic purposes, not to assess treatment outcomes. The scale is sex-specific, which means that biological males and biological females are given different versions of it. Among other differences, the female version includes questions on menstruation while the male version includes questions about erections. In their follow-up assessments, the Dutch team gave boys who had undergone hormonal treatments the girls’ scale and girls who had undergone hormonal treatments the boys’ scale. Thus, biological males were asked whether experiencing menstruation caused them distress. Since even boys who “transition” do not get periods, those who answered the questionnaire reported a low level of distress. In other words, the plummeting scores in gender dysphoria that the Dutch team reported as their “main finding” was not necessarily due to actually resolved dysphoria, but more likely to switching the scales.

Second, replication is a bedrock of scientific analysis, yet the only attempt to date to replicate the Dutch study, conducted in the U.K., failed. Preliminary results from the study, which began in 2010, were reported as very unimpressive, with adolescents after one year of puberty suppression showing an “increase in internalising problems and body dissatisfaction, especially natal girls.” Moreover, the cohort that received puberty blockers showed no statistically significant difference from the cohort that received only psychotherapy. As Michael Biggs has pointed out, the full picture of the study’s findings became public only after a prolonged campaign to force the researchers to publish their findings.

Contrary to what American activists imply, the systematic reviews of evidence in Sweden, Finland, and the U.K. did not find that the Dutch study, on which the Dutch protocol is based, constitutes high-quality evidence. One of the core questions in the systematic review by the U.K.’s National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (NICE) was this: “In children and adolescents with gender dysphoria, what is the clinical effectiveness of treatment with GnRH analogues [puberty blockers] compared with one or a combination of psychological support, social transitioning to the desired gender or no intervention?” Using the Grading of Recommendations, Assessment, Development, and Evaluations (GRADE) system, NICE assessed the Dutch study for seven reported metrics of mental health impact: gender dysphoria, depression, anger, anxiety, body image, global functioning, and psychosocial functioning.

It found that evidence for benefits across all seven measures was of “very low” certainty. NICE’s conclusion about all the studies on puberty blockers, including the Dutch, was unequivocal: “Studies that found differences in outcomes could represent changes that are either of questionable clinical value, or the studies themselves are not reliable and changes could be due to confounding, bias or chance.” NICE conducted a separate systematic review for cross-sex hormones (which the Dutch study did not independently cover) and found that “[a]ll the studies . . . are uncontrolled observational studies, which are subject to bias and confounding and were of very low certainty using modified GRADE. A fundamental limitation of all the uncontrolled studies included in this review is that any changes in scores from baseline to follow-up could be attributed to a regression-to-the mean” (because patients tend to report for care at the peak of their distress).

The systematic reviews by Sweden’s Committee for Medical and Social Evaluation (SBU), meantime, likewise found that the evidence for the mental-health benefits of hormones, including from the Dutch study, was very uncertain, because of the “moderate to high risk of bias” in these studies. The studies exhibit numerous methodological shortcomings, including confounding factors, lack of control groups, and high rates of attrition. “The identified scientific basis regarding hormone treatment of children and adolescents with gender dysphoria,” SBU concludes, “is limited and it is not possible to draw any conclusions with moderate or high reliability. For most outcomes examined in this report, the evidence is insufficient and conclusions cannot be drawn.” SBU also reported “low confidence” in the assessed health risks of hormonal interventions in minors. In essence, Sweden recognizes this as a medical experiment with no high-quality, reliable data on long-term benefits or risks.

The results from the evidence review in Finland are harder to interpret because most of the studies evaluated involved adults, and the review did not rate the quality and reliability of the studies. In other words, the review did not try to assess the degree to which even the positive findings in the Dutch study were causally related to the hormonal treatments. Nevertheless, on the basis of this review, and a study published by Finnish gender clinicians shortly thereafter finding that “medical gender reassignment is not enough to improve functioning and relieve psychiatric comorbidities,” the country’s Council for Choices in Health Care (COHERE) issued new recommendations in 2020. Even for patients whose gender issues appeared first in childhood and intensified in adolescence (a pathway that is required for hormonal eligibility under the Dutch protocol but optional under the American-affirmative one), COHERE recommends that “the first-line treatment for gender dysphoria is psychosocial support and, as necessary, psychotherapy and treatment of possible comorbid psychiatric disorders.” In the same document, COHERE emphasizes that “gender reassignment of minors is an experimental practice.” This includes minors transitioned under the Dutch protocol.

Yes, Sweden, Finland, and the U.K. still allow a tiny subset of minors with gender issues access to puberty blockers and cross-sex hormones. But they are doing so under tight restrictions and against the findings of their own systematic reviews—or, as in the case of Finland, in full recognition that this constitutes medical experimentation on minors.

A good case can be made that Republicans who seek to ban these interventions entirely are being more faithful to the findings of the European evidence reviews. The real debate between red states in the U.S. and European health authorities is not about whether there is good evidence for pediatric gender transition. There isn’t. Rather, the debate is about whether children as young as eight with a strong desire for “gender affirming” drugs have the ability to understand fully and give informed consent to the long-term consequences of these interventions—and even if they can, whether this justifies enlisting them in an uncontrolled medical experiment.

==

When they lie with facts.

[unhypnotist]

The Power of Controlled Strength: Why Every Man Must Be Capable of Violence, But Seek to Avoid It

In a world that often misrepresents masculinity, strength, and violence, it’s crucial to understand the nuanced role they play in a man’s life. Many confuse the capacity for violence with aggression or dominance, leading to either the glorification of unchecked power or the rejection of strength altogether. The truth lies somewhere in between: being capable of violence is a necessary skill for any man, but it should never be the end goal.

As a martial artist with over 40 years of experience, I’ve learned that the essence of training is not to fight but to avoid fighting at all costs. Breaking free from societal conditioning and negative mental trances involves understanding this balance. It means cultivating the ability to protect yourself and those you love, while embodying the discipline, restraint, and wisdom to use that ability only when absolutely necessary.

---

The Role of Controlled Violence in Masculinity

Violence is an uncomfortable subject for many, but the reality is that the ability to act decisively in defense of yourself or others is an integral part of being a man. This doesn’t mean seeking conflict or proving your dominance. It means having the capacity to act when the situation demands it.

1. Strength as a Foundation

Strength is a core attribute of masculinity, not just physically but mentally and emotionally. The capacity for controlled violence stems from strength:

Physical Strength: The ability to protect yourself and others starts with physical capability. Without it, you’re vulnerable to threats beyond your control.

Mental Strength: The discipline to train, prepare, and remain calm under pressure is just as important as physical skill.

Emotional Strength: True strength includes the ability to control your emotions, ensuring you act rationally and with purpose.

2. The Necessity of Preparedness

The world is unpredictable. While most of us will never face life-threatening situations, the ability to respond effectively is invaluable. Whether it’s defending your family from harm or diffusing a tense situation, preparedness provides a sense of confidence and security that extends far beyond physical combat.

3. The Restraint to Avoid Conflict

Violence, when unchecked, leads to destruction. But the capacity for violence, combined with the wisdom and discipline to avoid it, creates a powerful dynamic. Men who are capable of violence but choose peace are not weak—they are masters of their own strength.

---

Breaking the Negative Trances Around Violence and Masculinity

Many men fall into societal trances that distort their relationship with strength and violence. These trances either glamorize violence as a measure of masculinity or vilify it as inherently toxic. Breaking free from these narratives is essential for reclaiming authentic masculinity.

1. The Macho Trance

Some men equate violence with dominance, using physical strength as a way to assert power over others. This mindset often stems from insecurity, creating a cycle of aggression that ultimately leads to isolation and failure.

Breaking this trance means understanding that violence is not a measure of worth or manhood. True strength is quiet, controlled, and purposeful—not loud or destructive.

2. The Passive Trance

On the other hand, modern culture often portrays any expression of masculine strength as dangerous or undesirable. Men are encouraged to suppress their instincts to protect and provide, leading to passivity and disconnection from their natural roles.

Breaking this trance requires rejecting the notion that strength and violence are inherently bad. Masculinity is not the problem—misguided or unchecked use of power is.

3. The Fear-Based Trance

Many men avoid conflict altogether out of fear—fear of failure, fear of harm, or fear of standing up for what’s right. This trance keeps men trapped in inaction, unable to protect themselves or their loved ones when it matters most.

Breaking free involves confronting these fears and developing the confidence to act decisively when necessary.

---

The Discipline of Avoidance

The ultimate goal of cultivating strength and the capacity for violence is to avoid its use. Martial arts, at its core, is a discipline of peace. It teaches that the highest form of mastery is not in fighting but in resolving conflict without violence.

1. Confidence Reduces Fear

When you know you’re capable of defending yourself, fear no longer drives your decisions. This confidence allows you to approach tense situations with calm and clarity, often diffusing them before they escalate.

2. Respect for Others

Training in controlled violence instills respect for its power and consequences. You learn to value life and the well-being of others, making you less likely to engage in unnecessary conflict.

3. Focus on Solutions

The ability to avoid violence stems from a problem-solving mindset. Instead of reacting emotionally or impulsively, you learn to think strategically, seeking solutions that preserve peace and protect everyone involved.

---

How to Cultivate Controlled Strength

For men seeking to reclaim their masculinity and break free from negative trances, developing controlled strength is a crucial step. Here’s how to start:

1. Train Your Body

Physical training is the foundation of strength. Whether through martial arts, weightlifting, or endurance training, developing your body builds confidence and resilience.

2. Train Your Mind

Mental discipline is just as important as physical skill. Practice mindfulness, meditation, or focused breathing to cultivate calmness and clarity under pressure.

3. Learn Self-Defense

Enroll in martial arts or self-defense classes to develop the skills and confidence to protect yourself and others. Remember, the goal is not to fight but to be prepared if you must.

4. Embrace Responsibility

Understand that your strength is not for personal gain but for service. As a protector, your role is to safeguard those you love and contribute positively to your community.

5. Practice Restraint

Strength without control is dangerous. Practice restraint in all areas of life, from managing your emotions to avoiding unnecessary conflicts.

---

The Outcome: A Man of Strength and Peace

When you cultivate the capacity for violence while choosing peace, you become a man of strength and integrity. You’re no longer reactive or driven by fear, but calm, confident, and prepared to act when necessary.

This balanced approach transforms not only your relationship with violence but your entire life. It deepens your relationships, enhances your leadership, and allows you to live with purpose and clarity.

---

The Balance of Strength and Peace

Being capable of violence is not about seeking conflict or proving your worth—it’s about preparedness, confidence, and responsibility. When you break free from the trances that distort masculinity, you realize that true strength lies in the ability to protect without aggression, to lead without domination, and to resolve without violence.

As a man, your capacity for controlled strength is not just a skill—it’s a gift. Use it wisely, and you’ll not only protect those you love but inspire others to rise to their highest potential. Because a man who is both strong and peaceful is a man who cannot be stopped.

[cosmicangel888]

Healing Eons of Distorted Masculine & Suppressed Divine Feminine ~ 5D

None will be able to move into any new realm of experience, consciousness co-creation without healing, coming into balance with their own 51% of soul experiences, life experiences of the psyche wounding, inner child wounding, from 3D-5D forms through out this one galaxy;

In the inner work attention, focus, direction of who you are, and through the allowance, acceptance, acknowledgement of such; facing your shadow, facing the wounding, of all separative beliefs you experience what is expansion of you; the soul of you, for that is the harmonization and healing process of soul fragments -

Healing is our re-integration of wounds, through our acceptance, acknowledging of ourself, our child that was ignored, left out, rejected, abandoned, not heard, abused, molested - and it is key to seek the help, support, and wisdoms for such multi-dimensional liberation you will receive in doing the self loving act of healing - this is how you transcend eons of warped and distorted harmful perspectives of self

It is the inner work, who are you, what you exist within, and what exists within you ~ how you know of yourself, choose in your behaviour, choice, and for eons, the DM has been highly distorted, taking misguided sacred texts out of context, surrendering to outer importance, ego driven superificial focus due to the lack of maturity, and nourishment of the DF; intuitive and emotional body

Immaturity of the emotional body, fields, and thus distorting the energetic gifts, skills, talents; through abusing energy, abusing the gifts, skills, for dominance and power over another - for if it is less acceptable to dominate someone in person, in the physical, in the human form in front of everyone, for fear of being outcast, and without choosing to heal such wounds and inner rejections, there are those DM, warped masonry groups, cult-like underground cults, gangs, that meet, gather, and find their acceptance of the inner child wounding that offers normality to aggression of others, acting out in violence, and so on.

Multi-dimensional Navigation -

See beyond the behaviour - offer love, compassion, and do what is best for you - your bodies, intuitive knowing will always show you truth, the vibration of truth and see past it, trust yourself above all.

Understanding Collective Energies, Templates, Imprints All Get to Be a Part of Healing -

eons of distorted DM - abuse of power, abuse of information, abuse of resources, to maintain control of others, paying off to control narrative, slight of hand, underground corruption, warping spirit, souls, society due to the corrupt of self and not choosing to heal ones own inner rejection, inner separation, abandonment, sexual abuse

Everything in our social world, our his-story, has women, children, elders literally non-existent - the ignorance, imbalance, and wounding is now being so evidently played out to our energetic nature, our divinity and how we are beyond being religion, and broken down by religion of judgment and separation -

We cannot, nor will we escape our multi-dimensionality - just as if we cannot escape God, Source; it is everything - we are, ou rDNA is multi-dimensional - from realms, planets, beings of light, angelics, reptilian, and so much more =

ONENESS UNITY DIVERSITY - ACCEPTANCE ~ 5D

We are not religion, or dissected of it, we are all equal, we are divine, we are sacred, we are alien, angelic, we are human and all women, all children, all nature, all Gaia, all elders - have a place, a voice and are leaders, and sayers, seers, prophets of good will and the evolution for Source, Creation - this is our journey of full and radical self acceptance -

We are divine beings of all forms, all ways, and all planets - It is our diversity - and in our uniqueness of One will be our healing

the imbalance of the DF - all have both that are to each, responsible to work on, heal, honour, live in expression, experience of your intuitive bodies, fields, and honouring the gifts or skills in balance and without interference - if such is not being expressed or suppressed, due to familial or social norms, which are illusory - simply beliefs and imprints but are meant to be transcended -

social beliefs are simple as; saying dairy food is not good for me, but choosing to like dairy food that is organic, it is merely choosing what will work for you and choosing it

Your reality constructs is the level of consciousness of those within the environment - how you choose to press out on norms, and stagnancy, and smallness - choosing to go within daily and design you - without concern of what anyone outside of you thinks or wants; in the safety and honour of all life - you will not be adding on karma to your 51% and slowly and surely transmuting the 3D realm -

Honouring yourself with daily self care techniques, practices, and helpful tips to reclaim your energy, hone your consciousness, and protect your fields, and energy when you are in, or around those that know what they are doing and choose to not care about how it affects you - or simply may not know but abuse others simply because they think they can -

Respect of your body, mind, energy, spirit, is everything to your own healing of the inner child and none have right over you -

--> say NO, and move on - do not engage and move away

one cannot jump, nor be offered 5D consciousness and realm dimension without doing the work, and none of higher consciousness would not want to lower their body of light, heart and chakra's after liberating themselves to sit back and wait for anyone that is not choosing to do the inner work; and those in relationships and families will have to make such decisions -

There is nothing more important than your own consciousness and the distortion of DM energies is that of such aggression, hate, anger, and abuse to the DF for it challenges the DM to look within and soften, to be compassionate, to be intuitive to self navigation, and self creation - and that is beliefs that are eons deep

Rape, disregarding another's body, in any way, specifically through sex, as this is the appendage that is used / was abused in cycles of rape, sexual incest, sexual molestation, and so on, and cycles continue unless each person is brave enough, bold enough to do what is unifying, what is healing and choose to break the cycle of abuse; the disrespect, disregard of any level of the physical is distorted - there are wounds needing to be healed

Disregarding, manipulating, twisting reality of youth, a child, another, intention of sex, disregard, trickery, sex with children of such, in any such way, is wounding that needs to be reviewed, and healed; the disrespect of children, their bodies, their spirit, their soul, their emotional and future - when you choose to abuse another, in minor, major ways, will, is, density, karma, cycles you will repeat until the lessons, the inner work, and inner reconnection with self, soul is made; the pain of abuse, the pain of facing such leaves many in continued cycles of projection and behaving trying to suppress the truth of the wound within -

Many childhood abuse will leave imprints, entities, and densities of energy of the 7 beliefs that then that child has to heal, transmute, and such disregard, disrespect of sexual life force, abuse of the body, disregarding another's; free will and safety, of its spirit, matter, will - will eventuate in karma and lead to situations, energy that has to be alchemized; healing is the only way around this and through this -

Which many abused children ending up on the streets, and living lives of destruction due to the errors and pain others had caused them - all within the community have a role and turning a blind eye to what you know is going on, what you have been a part of out of fear for your own safety and yet the innocents voice is not heard

When you withhold truth, information, energy, resources as a dominant tactic, fear tactic to control outcome, control the narrative to slow down court cases, and to keep someone in your space and energy - or to warp, abuse energy to think that it will not affect you, and force your way, over another -

You are always free - nothing and no one binds you - period. none own anyone bidding and sacrificing is illusionary - all have a choice to come to this conclusion and heal - and move on

What occurs in the ethers, the abuse of energy, the unhealed thinking they are 'getting away' with disrespect, abuse in the energetic, the vibrational raping that had been occurring to me for years, by groups, people using abusing my life force, my fields, my wisdoms, and stealing my work, content, and with profound misinformation, misguidance, and however, whomever such people were guided by in doing such cult activity will result in not only spiritual jail, but physical -

Whatever occurs in the ethers - when practiced enough, intention, direction, forcible way; will be brought to the physical - why being aware, being in your healed self mastered stated - when you manifest from wounding - you create more wounding -

None can force another to be with them, or live with them or in any way want to when there is utter disrespect and disregard and such vibrational raping, etheric dream raping, games of bidding, bondage, and such malice energetic play, is not only watched, seen, known by Source, your highest self, your soul, the Akashic councils and all levels of hierarchy, especially those that make trickery, malice on energy and manipulation through force, greed, gluttony, and aggression; without choosing to take accountability and heal - make no mistake there is spiritual jail, free will and spiritual will taken, gifts, skills, all that was given, taken, and then experienced in the physical

What you intend manifests and when you are awake, you are able to guide your own body, mind, spirit, soul, consciousness - why when you reclaim your power, light, life energy -

BASIC SIMPLE FACTS ~ 5D

None have power over you - when you awaken to your own power to put a stop to continued energetic and superficial abuse of your time, energy, resources, light, you will have the support of spirit, God, for your evolution is everything to Creation - and overrides all.

Free Will is.

Spirit knows who is working with malice and harmful intent and who is working pure intention and calm resourceful healing and purity of intent to heal -

It only takes 1 choice to either claim more karma to clear, or choose to sit and heal and create the support and alliance with light; all have a choice -

Behaviour of Wounding; Signs to Seek Healing & Shift Away from What is Holding You from Peace

Projection, blaming, forcing, making, taking the free will, spirit, honour, innocence of another simply because one does not choose to be accountable and heal = will be the Heavens, and One's own higher self to re-route and direct so that no further are harmed; that is Spirit, Source, God, choosing karma and distributing it when enough is enough - and only the soul at the highest level with God can choose and decide this karma - period.

Those that think or believe any other that dictates and abuses such universal laws - will see it directly and so too is also a learning experience for there will always be those that simply want to reject you and what you say, regardless of what truth there is within it, because it is triggering what they choose not to look at and heal;

There are always higher forces; and know that all karma, all ways in which karma plays out, the ethers, the physical is all a way for all to choose in every new moment; heal, self love, and oneness, is what I am doing, offering, the greater good and not interfering;Ⓒ

UNIVERSAL LAWS - KARMA, SPIRITUAL ORDER ~ 5D

readers, spell casters, those of title, those that abuse energy, information, and misguide others to gain access, gain money, gain leeway for selfish gain ~ all is a choice that one either moves through density to clear and understand the lessons of the universal law, free will is something all will learn - your higher self will not allow any new cycles until all 'get' free will

these are universal pivot lessons - choose selfishly and arrogantly without healing - that is only more density and more harm to yourself, denial of yourself, and karma to you

We must also understand --> when we disrespect our own spirit, mind, body, through such devaluing acts; multiple sex partners, ignorance of your own life force, porn, group sex, and orgies, and so on; such leave whatever energy each person is resonanting at in why they chose to be in the act; will be the exact entity, or imprint, or density that they will have to clear, face, alchemize, and if one chooses not to, that entity will grow in strength to continue feeding itself purpose until you are shown; and towers are not necessary to learn that harsh lessons;

Your life force is everything - it sustains your life - body, matter, mind, soul, spirit and affects all - make no mistake about our higher learning about who we are is key to healing our social issues, illness, disease, violence, crime, and any other human issue - it is related to our consciousness - the higher consciousness - the less disease, the greater peace, abundance, honour, harmony

There will be those, it will be seen, that simply want to remain and create drama, chaos, and live off of others, and siphon, leech, cause harm - they are not evolved and choose not to leave their post until Source, Spirit, Their own higher self - for again, no 1 human overrides the grander plan, and / or free will of another

Control, dominance and fear based leading is being shaking to be remade - period.

For example; one that does not have a strong sense of self, people pleasers, brought up in dogmatic conditioning, patterning out of your sense of self, sense of speaking up, creative expression all taken out of your own intuitive knowing; will have entities and imprints (part of your linage and karmic clearing; sometimes called hexes, spells, curses) you are here to clear what you linage was unable -

Evolution --> Consciousness - Consciousness is EVERYTHING to all species evolution - peace, unity, inventiveness, youthfulness, and so on;

From a higher consciousness and perspective, and potential of you - who are you - doing the inner work; all is possible however, in the case of the above; the core issues are lack of self, separation of self; thus it will engage in behaviour of seeking outer approval, validation, seeking the energy, attention, doing such things for attention, bullying, stalking and gang activities will gain and sometimes be led for there are extremes and oftentimes, one will not choose to heal and explore the negative range of a souls experience - ultimately for the reasons and lessons of forgiveness, self acceptance, compassion and self love

entering into an orgie, group sex, in the thinking, (again misguided and not informed) that it will be fun, and hot, and make you feel like a big person and whatever status one thinks will come from such an act; the sharing of your life force, whatever the intention of EVERY PERSON INVOLVED is what you engage with - and you have opened, literally - allowed, given permission to every persons intentions, energy, entities, and life history to play through you on such;

Children that are highly sensitive empathic, crystalline, and healers - are tortured in such; as we feel everything 100X's and such entities and feelings, imprints are like living in a daily hell - why such abused children choose drugs and the easier way out;; for there is no understanding of energy at their level, there is no outer resource and help, due to misogynistic distortions of such disregard of women, mothers, the protectors of the home, and the entire ideal of safety completely ripped from their sense of self, and live in a constant state of anxiety and fear

You are here to honour, use, navigate, enhance and live in your fullest Oneness; DNA, multi-dimensionality of your spirit, mind, body, soul, all encompassing being-ness - and to live only from one small belief will create that small reality - all is transcend able and healable - abuse is not necessary - we are beyond such taking of life, harming of life - none will escape these lessons

Entities attached to your multi-dimensionality are varied and it will be exactly where your gifts talents are psychically so that you can hone, operate lovingly within and help others, and to what your wound is - there is always an equal balance - to where the wound is, will be where the gift is - this is universal and intelligence of the design of the God-self - all are back and related to the very highest and designed soul blueprints -

If you know about your vastness, the multi-dimensionality, and divine alignment, engagement, support, and love you always have - 60% of the cycles can be broken in only 1 year of global offering, teaching of such - Ⓒ

The spiral of creation is eternal - and you wanted to know all aspects of such laws, knowing, expanding - soul growth is such; creation is not superficial and titles, money mean nothing in the spiritual realm ego is not thing in the spiritual realm -

We are here for the harmonization through love, unity, and peace of self, making peace with the past and honouring all paths - uniquely and diversely - wounding is how violence, pain, suffering occur

those that benefit from crime, those that pull the strings of underground crime; be the first to be healed; that is where the higher levels of 'control and choosing of direction of the entire group, operation' exists - one-by-one all will released from the grip of false notions, misguided information, not knowing the realms of energy that become real, free will being our greatest tools, and what will be taken, in equal measure of what the soul contract was offered to heal and transcend and make anew;

Your life path is your gift - to offer and help others - when you show self love to want to heal, to make your life new, better, source and spirit knows of your truth - truth will be your saving grace - Spirit knows ounce per ounce deception - none can, nor will fake ascension and what is heavenly, or spiritual jail, to be healed within higher vibrational groups to understand universal laws, and then re-enter as a soul, human, or other form -

All are given literally eons, greater good, and what is common human curteousy to change, alter course, before physical ramifications unfold - ego, entity attachment, unheeded warning of spirit, and not honouring the spiritual laws, universal laws, all will be the karma one has chosen within - you create it all.

There are no 3D counselling teachings, offerings that understand multi-dimensionality - none are taught about their bodies, minds, hearts, soul and how to reclaim their power, always walk in their power and call abuse what it is before it happens;

Education is key - higher vibrational education -

Every cycle of abuse we have in our world, disease, illness, and violence, crime, corruption, trafficking is healable -

Choose to stop the cycles of abuse.

Every child, every woman, anyone being abused;

--> Say NO and no is a complete sentence and know your will the WILL I AM PRESENCE is your saving grace - the grace of God will protect and guide you -

Spirit, God, Source, Angelics are all over everything that is within the 'strange, weird, miraculous' when there has been ample, undeniable truths brought and outright malice, greed has been the goal ~ this is how karma works; Spirit will assure that the innocent, once you awaken to your free will, reclaiming your power, light, energy, from negative and toxic situations - you are the will that allows the heavens and spiritual beings to protect and allow your evolution to continue -

NOTHING IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN YOUR EVOLUTION - CONSCIOUSNESS - PERIOD!

We can and we will heal profound human, social, worldly issues and illness of self.

We are here to transcend vibrational petty games are no longer played with; ascension is not a joke, neither is playing with an innocent child's soul, spirit, mind, body, nor any other aspect of life - all know when one needs to be healed - when you live in disrespect of life, in any way; there is healing - go within

None have authority over your free will - your will is the will of God - Unity, Peace of all self, soul, spirit, all Within our world is all possible - we are one, and when you truly love yourself, honour and value; have worthiness of yourself; you choose higher ways of life, creation, and treating others - for you know - you affect the all - and what you do, will return -

thy will be done - in grace and good will to all

Speak your truth children and know your body, your mind is your 's to navigate and none others - none are allowed to touch your body, or harm your innocence, energy, mind!

NO is NO and speak up, tell someone tell anyone and keep speaking on what you experience until you are heard -

Know dear women, those that play with you mentally, emotionally, spiritually, energetically - when you have voiced truth, your will, your needs and wants; they are karmic energies and you should not remain in situations that offer red flag after red flag - no is a complete sentence; karmic energies want to keep playing and they show disrespect once without choosing to heal their beliefs of less than, lack, distortions - then it will continue - never compromise who you are, your life, your light for the games of proving yourself, being tested for your truth, for your spiritual strength and when it was certainly not asked of those doing the testing -

Again double standard - why is it 'ok' for beings, men, clubs, groups, councils, cults to 'test' -disrespect a person in every way, with humiliation tactics, abusing energy, when it says nothing to do with integrity, truth, heavenly order, heavenly power

Self love, Self Honour, Self Empowerment - is only gained through choosing and doing the inner work - releasing old beliefs

When a man, person, boss, tests you - it is passive aggressive, toxic; you will be tested however through Creation, your own soul for the integrity you rare meant to carry and emit - you do this of yourself - but red flag when others act in competition, testing your loyalty, and attention, are all games of lack of self, narcism, abuse

Women; your free will is your healing - know you can design who you are in every new moment and keep with what you know to be true;

When others make your life consistently harder, leaving you in less than while they walk away with your ideas, money, energy - then it is time to leave - they are using, abusing you - and karma will be returned -

Release those that refuse to be truthful and those that continue to degrade, not provide you proper credit and pay, and in being such, challenging and following through - we shift the distorted energies on our planet that have subjugated reality in disregard for eons

Release those that use and abuse you - in any way; when you value and appreciate you - set new standards and never compromise from those that play with your life

STAND IN YOUR POWER - REBALANCE ~ 5D

Source, God, Spirit, your guides, will assure that those that had abused you, used you, tormented you, will not share in what you have earned and gracefully gave so freely and without any appreciation but further blaming, taking, and torment to give more; these are highly narcistic abusive circles - consciousness that cycles in pain, and self destruction - so leave and move on as quickly as you can; You don't deserve to be devalued and degraded simply because that is where someone else sits and refuses to heal.

Distorted DM energies will, when unhealed, choose binding, controlling and domineer an energy they cannot understand, or not control, or manipulate - and what toxic, negative, demonic conjuring back-fire will have those experiencing such until they go within and get to the route of their imbalance and heal;

Speak on truth; release and transcend pettiness; simply be truth and truth will always prevail -

My work has been my work - none can copy a conduit, it is impossible; for it is connected to the soul - the lifetimes, the solace of being, healing, harmonizing, daily alignment and being in Source flow, chakra's healed to allow spirit to flow, constant DNA upgrades, and lifetime experience that one accesses through 'doing the inner work'

We must wake up dear ones - corruption and taking, stealing, crime is not necessary - simply understanding who you are

there is no quick way to energy and knowing of Source;

IT IS INNER WORK

And we are seeing everywhere; entertainment, sports, business, the abuse of energy, cult-like running of owning, bidding peoples lives, art, talent, gifts, energy and the unhealed aspects; sacrificing is being seen, brought forward in all arena's and what trafficking is; sacrifice of childhood, the sacred child, our futures, and disregard entirely of how precious life is for superficial false title, resources, and game; in the end the spirit will know immediately - it was never worth it.

Hidden agenda's, those not working within integrity - will be felt and known; we are all a part of re-writing the AdamEve Imprints for new earth energy and templates -

And why it is not necessary, will never pay off, doing spell work, dishonouring free will, and interfering with another's energy, light, path, or bodies; these are actual laws, rights, and none on earth have power to override - Source, God, Spirit will step in - arrogance and de-evolving humanity over the greater good will no longer be tolerated; it is time to wake up dear ones, heal the wounds in which you feel the need to control; these are fear based and wounded issues - heal thy wounds so they do not become another's

control, domineering, forcing on any energy, as energy, spiritual jail will result, then thus physical jail - what you do in the energetic will be physical - what you put out returns; all play in choice -

healing would be the higher choice - but that is free will and know the innocent free will, free will of women, will be protected and respected - in the most high realms - wake up, claim your light, energy, and choice -

Projection, energy abuse, deflection, deceit, manipulation, and energetic spell work, controlling narratives, of those that do not want to let you go, or take and bind themselves to you due to their karma and choices of harm and greed - none have this right and you are in charge of your play, your reality - and say no, cut out all energy and send it all back - stand in your power and send away -

No is a complete sentence and you do not have to explain, or tell, or make any other understand you and what makes you feel safe and honoured and respected

I know the work and healing help I have created - and there have been a lot of selfish, shady, false people that have had their hands in what is not even understood, not valued, not aligned with - and they call it, behave as if they are ENTITLED - what if all the energy one has to harm, corrupt, take, steal, from anyone, bidding, trafficking or whatever the ill is put on another - to direct within and heal, create, manifest in love?

What magic could each create and has always been our message - such disregard, torture and mess is so unnecessary -

ALL HEALABLE - Harm to another is not necessary -

We are love

We are One

What you do to yourself, another, is and does affect the all -

Blessings and light

Joanna

JoannaCosmicAngel@yahoo.com

~ DONATIONS - see our PayPal link here; paypal.me/JoannaLRoss

#unity #peace #healinghumanity #healingourchildren #understandingascension #multidimensional #healingearth #5Dearth #5Dhumanity #Gaia #5Dhuman #livinglight #lifeforce #god #Source #spirit #souldestiny #soul #consciousness #healingDivineMasculine #healingdivinefeminine #healing #energyhealing #earth #lightships #firstcontact #UFO's #aliens #celestialbeings #GalacticFederation

[tainted-wine]

Subject: RAPTOR

Nomu!Hawks x Reader (NSFW)

This GIANT is the lovechild of this amazing fanart and this ask:

I twisted the shizznit out of that ask, but the inspiration is still there. A thank you to anyone who makes it through this very long ride.

This fic does takes some liberties in the creation of nomu. Some factors will deviate from canon.

Words: 20k+

You can also read this long-ass story on AO3 if that’s more comfortable.

Heed these warnings: Blood and Death, Teratophilia/Monster-Fucking, Breeding, Mutant Genitalia, Unethical Experimentation, Mutilation, lots of handjobs and cum, LOTS of long tongue action and I’m ashamed, Brief Suicide Ideation, and Shitty Science

——–x——–

Fertile nomu were the greatest breakthrough that the villains could ever hope for. Breeding saves so much time and resources, as opposed to artificially creating each specimen from scratch. There were two major “programs”, as these sick bastards insist on calling them. 

The Mating Program, where the nomu were paired together, one with male sexual organs and the other with those of a female, though there was also the occasional subject that managed to possess both. It was an unpredictable process; miscarriages were common, sometimes the offspring dies minutes after birth, or the fetus develops too rapidly inside the womb and the birth becomes a violent bursting out of the parent’s body. Weaker nomu, usually the ones incapable of rapid regeneration, have been killed from such incidents. “What a waste,” those bastards in lab coats would say.

And then there was the Milking Program, in which semen was collected to later be frozen or artificially inserted into ‘other creatures’. Yeah, they say it as if ninety percent of those creatures weren’t humans.

You were an unwilling member of the latter program, but the assholes sure did love making it sound like they were doing you a favor.

“This entire precinct is yours,” they said. “Your very own farm of all-powerful beasts!”

Gee, thanks. Just what you always wanted, to jerk off abominations and collect their cum. To be fair, it could be worse. At least you weren’t one of the unlucky ones being impregnated. Your possession of a quirk, albeit a mostly useless one, probably saved you from that fate. Those without a quirk had a higher chance of passing down all of the Nomu’s abilities. Just another addition to the long list of Why Being Quirkless Fucking Sucks.

The weaker and simpler nomu aren’t an issue. A sort of imprinting drives them to obey your every command. Hell, jerking them off isn’t even needed — you can literally just order them to ejaculate, and the damn things are spewing out their putrid seed before you can even prepare your containers.

The most troublesome part of your “job” was the High Ends. They are powerful, sentient, and God help you, have an actual sex drive. They were obedient to an extent, but you can’t hold complete control over something that was specifically designed for independent thinking. You were responsible for only five of these advanced nomu, and that was too many. The touchy bastards always wanted more than just a handjob, vocalizing their lust through distorted throats. The long, beastly groans of “inside” and “give pussy” echoed in your head throughout the day and into the night.

These things can literally pound you into mush, and the very thought of carrying their horrifying children makes your throat burn with rising bile. You don’t believe it’s worth risking your life just to please their monster dicks.

That was all before they introduced you to a new ‘pet’. You stood in the hallway of your assigned area of the old hospital and watched two approaching figures. Ugh, another damn High End to make things more difficult, but this one made your heart skip a beat. 

Most of the creature’s body was a solid black, just like the rest within its tier. It was more slender than the others, upper body leaning forward with the support of long legs with joints that reminded you of a bird. Both its hands and feet were covered in scales and ended in large talons. A grand pair of ebony wings were folded behind its back, and a muscular feathered tail swayed with its movements. Overall, its appearance was a mixture of avian and reptilian.

The feathery wings were a huge hint, but absolute certainty struck you when you made eye contact, gold-filled eyes with a bird-like slant on a face that still managed to stay youthful after so many alterations to its body. You listened in on the villains’ conversations whenever they were around. With no access to any kind of media in this place, it was the only way to stay up-to-date with everything happening outside of these cursed labs. You remember hearing about their latest victory, how they managed to overpower and kill the number two hero of Japan, dreadful news that you refused to believe. But the beast that was eyeing you curiously gave you no choice but to accept the truth.

Hawks has become their newest nomu.

The doctor accompanying him smiled proudly, commanding the monster to take your side. You gulped and tried not to flinch in his presence; you were always extra tense around new additions that didn’t know you yet. “Hawks is dead,” the doctor said calmly. “Say hello to our latest work: Raptor.”

You think you’d rather stick with ‘Hawks’. The doctor doesn’t wait for a response before continuing. “We expect samples from this one daily.”

The shocking demand has you speaking before you can stop yourself. “Why?”

The man’s impassive eyes darkened and you shrink back, considering an apology but deciding that it was best to just keep your mouth shut. Prisoners like you followed a set of rules, the most important one being ‘No Questions’. They’ll feed you to the very beasts entrusted in your care without batting an eye.

Lucky for you, this man was willing to give you a pass. “Analysis, fertilization, storage for future plans…many matters that don’t concern you. Expect me every morning to take it in for testing. Until then, get it settled and collect the first sample.”

You shuddered, sneaking a glance at Hawks, who was busy looking up at the occasional flicker of the ceiling light. It was careless to underestimate how observant the High Ends were, but this is the first time you’ve seen one so openly curious. Normally they would just absently stare at nothing when left idle.

Only when the doctor turned to leave did you finally give the newcomer your full attention. “Hawks?”

He continued to watch the blinking bulbs with great interest.

“Um…Raptor?”

You nearly jumped from how quickly his entire body turned toward you, completely still and waiting for whatever instructions came next.

You scratched at your head nervously. “Right, I guess that really is your name now. Well, come with me.”

He followed you down the old hall and past the rooms where others of his kind rested, talons tapping against the tiles with each step.

 x---x---x---x---x 

Raptor’s exposed frontal lobe throbs.

He doesn’t remember anything before his awakening in that cold and wet chamber. Was there anything before? Had he just been born?

Perhaps…but it just didn’t feel right.

x---x---x---x---x

  Like all the other nomu, Hawks’s private space was nothing more than an emptied patient room. Their loyalty was the only thing keeping them from breaking down the old doors or tearing through the worn walls. Every minute spent alone with these superhumans was a gamble with your life.

But again, the newcomers make you extra nervous.

You stood at the door while Hawks examined his new home. He sniffed and pawed at every nook and cranny like an animal in unfamiliar surroundings, straightening his flexible spine to touch the ceiling before lowering himself on all fours. He seemed just as comfortable crawling as he was with walking; you can only imagine how incredible his agility has become. The beloved wing hero was best known for his swiftness in defeating and subduing villains, and it looks like the mad scientists sought to maximize his talents. The average nomu was built to be an indestructible powerhouse. Hawks was built to be an even more efficient predator than he already was.

As much as you didn’t want to interrupt him, you had a job to do. “Raptor…”

His head whipped around to pin you with a sharp stare, molten yellow slits revealing the red irises that only appear when focused. You tensed, but he made no further movements.

You cleared your throat and took a deep breath. Nomu respond best to a confident and assertive voice. “Just relax and stay still. It’s time for me to collect some sperm, if you even know what that means.” You grab the jar that you had already prepared in the corner.

He shook his wings and soft mane of hair, leaving his head a poofy mess. Well that was…cute. You approached him before setting the container back down and reaching for the pathetic rags they called shorts. It’s beyond ridiculous how these sadistic doctors are willing to completely violate and alter a person’s corpse, yet they force the abominations to keep their junk covered as some form of decency.

A low rumble vibrated from his chest as you dropped to your knees and pulled down his only article of clothing, allowing the not quite human-looking cock to spring free — a thick base with a curved shaft decorated with scale-like ridges on the top and bottom, then tapering to an arrow-like head, twitching and growing each second. You’ve seen stranger dicks, but it still catches you by surprise. Was Hawks’s dick always like this?

Is that a distasteful question? He is technically dead.

The moment your hand made contact, a loud hiss rushed past his teeth and he stepped back, wings flapping as he backed away until he hit the wall.

“Calm down.” His reaction startled you, but your voice remained steady. He wasn’t showing any signs of aggression, his widened eyes and timid posture gave the impression that he was just caught off-guard. “Calm,” you repeated more softly.

A few seconds pass while his breaths slow and he stands straight again to give you access to his fully hardened cock.

You try to move more slowly, at first running just your fingertips along his length to ease him into the feeling. You smiled at the sight of his face relaxing; he was surprisingly expressive. “See? It’s not so bad, is it?”

His mouth opened to give you a glimpse of sharp teeth that could easily shred your flesh, but the only sounds that come out are several choked peeps. He winces and brings a clawed hand to his throat.

“Can’t talk yet, huh? Don’t worry, it usually takes a few days for you guys.” You closed your fingers around his shaft in a firm grip and began to stroke him.

The soft purrs must mean that he has fully given in. He thankfully hasn’t made any grabs at you yet; only staring down and watching you explore every inch of his pitch-black meat, taking his leaking pre-cum and smearing it all over for lubrication.

His wings shiver and his tail begins to swing wildly—you flinch at each loud thud whenever the powerful limb whacks the wall or slams into the floor. You briefly wonder if the feathers on his tail are capable of becoming sharp blades like the ones on his wings.

The purrs become low growls as he begins to bend over your kneeling form, muscular thighs quivering around you. His cock was twitching under your quickening pace, notifying you that it was time to grab the jar and get ready. “No need to hold back. Go ahead and cum.”

He obeyed with a high screech and two sets of talons seized your shoulders, tearing through cloth and digging into your skin. You yelped, but didn’t halt your milking of his cock, ensuring each spurt of cum landed inside the container. Blood can be felt trickling down your arms, his grip on the verge of crushing bone until he finally lets go after his final spasm. You release the breath you didn’t even know you were holding as you sealed the jar and stood up. “Good, now rest,” you said through clenched teeth and turned to leave.

A distorted chirp is heard behind you; you twisted your head to see Hawks rushing forward, and your heart jumps into your throat. Fuck, what did you do? Did turning your back excite him? Running wasn’t a smart option at this point. You held the fresh warm sample close to you as you shut your eyes and braced for whatever the nomu had planned.

But when he was close enough for you to feel his hot breath against your back, nothing happened. Then there were fingers, the same fingers that pierced your flesh with their hooked claws, lightly tracing over the bleeding wounds. It was a touch that was way too gentle for a monster created to kill.

You heard the choked sounds again, and you take a look at his face as he strains to form a word, eventually giving up and mouthing it instead. What you read from his lips was something that hasn’t been said to you during your entire time in this hellish hospital.

‘Sorry.’

He retreats to a corner and curls up his entire body like an animal sleeping in the cold.

You felt like the one unable to speak now, mouth opening and closing in search of a response. Eventually you were able to collect yourself. “It’s alright…I guess. Not the first time one of you has handled me roughly. First time one of you showed any regret, though…it’s honestly really freaking me out.” You giggle uncomfortably and decide that you need to hurry up and treat yourself before the scratches get infected. “Rest,” you make sure to command before rushing out of the door.

The restroom held a shabby but functional shower that will rid you of the blood, and the workers were at least generous enough to give you the bare minimum of first-aid along with extra gowns. A couple excruciating dabs of alcohol on the open wounds should clean them up just fine.

You’ll have to think about Hawks’s odd behavior later. You still had other nomu to tend to.

 x---x---x---x---x

Subject: Raptor

Field Test

Quirk #1: Fierce Wings

Notes: As the host’s original quirk, we don’t expect Raptor to experience any difficulties with Fierce Wings. It should serve more as a refresher for his memory. With a brain more advanced than any other nomu so far, he should still be quick in attacking and reacting. His slightly enlarged wings will allow for greater endurance during flight, and of course, a bigger arsenal of feathers. The feathers on his tail are also to be tested.

The room that Raptor stood in the center of was filled with targets everywhere—some static, some moving in fixed patterns. The humans in coats were a safe distance away and watching him closely.

“Raptor, strike the targets with your feathers.”

He didn’t even have a chance to see which one gave the order before his body was already reacting. It took only seconds for him to pin the locations and time the movements of each target. In a flash, black sharpened feathers darted in multiple directions and pierced every mark in the room.

He didn’t care about impressing the Coats, but he still released a pleased hum after hearing his entire audience gasp. The whole situation felt familiar for some reason. Completing such a test felt so natural to him, he could probably do it blindfolded.

“Again, but this time use only the feathers from your tail.”

He obeyed. With his body lowered and tail raised, it only took two seconds longer to hit each mark.

Several more tests took place. He chopped objects of different materials and varying thickness, sliced apart a combat robot while using only his tail as a blade, and showed off his speed and aerial maneuvers during a small obstacle course.

His brain pulsed painfully. He doesn’t understand why taking so many commands was such a painful struggle.

He didn’t mind the tests much. At least he can actually do something in these test fields, as opposed to sitting in his empty room all day. After the very pleasant time spent with you, it was nothing but hours of pacing, scratching, and grooming out of boredom.

You mentioned there being others like him in those rooms. How do they handle having absolutely nothing to do for so long?

“Its mind tends to wander, doesn’t it?”

He turns to the source of the voice and finds a pair of Coats that stared at him like they were trying to probe his mind with just their eyes. The rest were scrambling about, discussing the excellence of his performance and scribbling notes.

But these two only seemed interested in watching him get lost in his thoughts. He stared back, waiting to see if they had any commands to give.

One of them only smirked as the loyal creature stood at full attention. “Yes, not very hostile, either. Not only is he capable of higher levels of thinking, he is the first High End that doesn’t host the body of some brutish villain. A more complex mind often comes with very human...quirks.”

Raptor blinks. They really enjoyed saying that particular word.

x---x---x---x---x

When you stepped into Hawks’s room for the second morning, you were ready to step right back out when you saw the state of it.

Claw marks everywhere, covering the walls and floor like webs embedded in the surface. Hawks was looking at you closely while stooped low to the floor, but his body appeared relaxed and not ready to lunge.

Not a single hair on you moved when you spoke. “Are you alright?”

He tilted his head at the question, releasing a puff of air through his nostrils before returning to whatever he was trying to do to the floor. He wasn’t violent with his movements. The talons scraped across wide curves, long lines, other patterns with seemingly no goal in mind. Looking around at the other claw marks, you realize that none of them are the angry slashes of a beast throwing a fit. They all looked to have been drawn in a calm matter, twisting and turning into random non-specific shapes.

“Raptor, are you…bored?”

He paused his carving to look at you again and releases a long and drawn-out groan, throat vibrating along with the vocals. Was that a whine?

All of the High Ends had traces of their original personality, but this was on another level. It wasn’t unwelcomed, however. “You know, when the other High Ends don’t have anything to do, they kinda just…I don’t know, it’s like they put their brains on a power-saver mode. You can’t do that?”

His brain responds with several strong pulses. Gross, you’re never going to get used to that pink-gray matter moving around. After what was apparently deep thought, Hawks gave a softer groan and shook his head.

You couldn’t help but laugh humorlessly at this entire situation. “Incredible. You’d think that these smartasses would know that making a creature of extraordinary intelligence—I bet that’s what they said—would mean that your big gross brain needs regular stimulation. Geniuses, my ass.”

Hawks gave a beastly snort. Seems like he agrees with you. You don’t mean to sound like those insane bastards, but it truly was incredible to see a High End that showed interest in casual conversation, not just commands or any opportunity to cause destruction.

Feeling confident that he won’t maul you out of boredom, you finally approach and kneel in front of him. “Sorry, there’s not much I can do about that,” you said with genuine sympathy. “Not like I have any entertainment of my own. My room sucks too. But—“ You held up your fresh new jar. “Maybe we can kill some time together again? God, that makes me sound like a sex worker for you guys.”

You don’t know if he has a sense of humor, but he clearly understands your hints and perks up. He stands so that your face is leveled with his groin, black scaly hands tugging at his shorts until a loud rip causes him to grunt in frustration. You giggle and decide to help tear the rest off. “They were just shitty rags, anyway,” you said.

He was already growing right in front of you. Your hand wraps around him for a second time, thankful that it doesn’t startle him again. He tenses for only a moment, but quickly relaxes when your stroking begins, a large pair of testes swinging freely now that there was no cloth to contain them.

“Wow,” you couldn’t help but gasp. “You’re not even built as big as the other nomu, but those are still impressive. I guess you’ve got plenty of samples to give, huh? Good, ‘cause I’ve gotta do this every damn day.”

You received a purr and a swish of his tail in response. It was a one-sided conversation, but it was still pretty refreshing. Milking the other High Ends was an uncomfortable task, one where you always had to be prepared with a loud and strong “No” or “Stop” whenever their excitement evolved into aggression. Every minute was tense, and despite your occasional wish for release from this shitty life, you didn’t want a violent end at the hands of these sex-hungry monstrosities.

His reactions weren’t too different from yesterday; he was being more vocal and less shy about physically expressing his pleasure. The massive black wings blew your hair back with each powerful beat, and his tail was thrashing about even more wildly.

His deep purrs weren’t unpleasant, slowly changing into higher mewls as he got closer. “Come on, just do what you did last time.”

And so he did, delivering another fresh sample straight into your container with a warped cry. His hands lingered right over you, clenched in tight fists that surely had those sharp talons digging into his rough palms. You couldn’t be sure, but it looked as if he was trying not to grab you this time. Would he really care about that without being told?

Hot, tired breaths blew into your hair as he recovered from his climax. Then, with his head reared back, he let out a yawn. You even heard a faint little whine similar to a dog escape him. It would have been pretty endearing if it weren’t for just how widely his mouth was opened, displaying the scary set of teeth within. Does he really use those in combat?

With his still-dripping member going flaccid, he returned to the spot he was scratching at, lazily tracing the markings that were already made. The thought of him doing this for another ten hours or so made you frown. They probably wouldn’t care if you stayed in this room a little longer than usual, would they?

Shrugging, you kneeled down again, this time resting beside him. Hawks stopped and looked at you curiously.

“Sharpen one of your feathers and give it to me,” you ordered.

Almost immediately a feather appears right in front of you. You grab it, taking care not to cut your fingers on the razor-like barbs. When’s the last time you’ve held a writing utensil? Shifting awkwardly next to the large nomu, you took the quill and began scratching lines into the floor. The hot heavy breaths and overall warmth from his close presence was hard to ignore. You’ve never been this close to a nomu for any reason that wasn’t jerking them off. He remained calm, watching your hand closely until you finished drawing a small grid.

“You know how to play tic tac toe?”

He blinked.

“…Okay, it’s pretty simple. You fill a space with either an ‘O’ or an ‘X’…”

Somehow, teaching a killer monster how to play a common children’s game was weirder than making him jizz. He caught on quickly, favoring X’s. You were winning each game at first, but once he figured out all of the possible patterns, every game was ending in a draw. You drew larger grids, sometimes having both of you move to a different spot for more room. Most matches were still draws, but he will sometimes catch you by surprise and scratch a row of three X’s that you didn’t notice in time, his tail swishing out of what may have been pride or enjoyment.

After a while you decided to show him other shapes. Maybe he can experiment with them more when you were gone. Who knows, soon he might be drawing more than random lines. He wasn’t bad company, to be honest. Then again, your standards have taken a nosedive ever since you winded up in this facility of unethical science. It was nice to spend time with anything that didn’t want to just tear you in half with a massive cock.

Only when you felt like you overstayed your welcome and stood back up did you realize how much of a mess you both made of the floor and walls.

“Oops, it looks like a bunch of kids got in here,” you said while looking at the collage of shapes and lines. Hopefully the doctors won’t find this too strange; he was pretty intelligent, after all. “Well, it’s about time I take my leave. You keep practicing your doodling skills, I guess.” With the jar of white fluid back in your arms, you headed on out, but a large hand grabs onto your arm.

Hawks’s yellow eyes were wider than usual, a scraping, guttural noise leaving his throat as he toyed with his voice.

“Sss…..aaayy…” Just like the other High Ends, his vocals were warped and all-around unsettling, but you could hear it, traces of the playful and smooth-talking hero that you used to watch during interviews and talk shows. It was barely there, but it was still there.

“St…aay.”

You couldn’t help the sad smile that graced your face. He was looking at you like a puppy. “Sorry, but I don’t know what they’d do if they notice me staying here for too long,” you explained.

He winced from the strain of his vocal chords. “Come…back?”

You shook your head. “There are cameras in the halls. I shouldn’t be going in and out of your room.” You tensed under his grip, afraid that refusing him like this will anger him. He has been very docile so far, but you don’t know what it takes to set him off.

Thankfully, he lets go of you and backs away with another one of those whines. For God’s sake, were you really feeling bad about leaving one of these...things?

To be fair, in the two days you’ve known him, Hawks was already much different from the others. Hell, he hasn’t even shown any true signs of aggression yet. The other High Ends are always expressing some desire to attack or break something. You thought it came naturally with all of the engineering. For something that was apparently supposed to be their finest specimen yet, Hawks’s behavior wasn’t fitting for his job at all. You just played tic tac fucking toe with him like two kids on a sidewalk.

That’s probably why you found yourself trying to reassure him. “We can play some more tomorrow. Don’t worry.”

An odd clicking noise was made—he sure had a variety of sounds reminiscent of birds—and he returned to his favorite corner, hooking his talons into an empty spot on the wall to begin yet another drawing.

The slightest hint of warmth could be felt in your chest as you left him to his creative tasks. This place sucks and has deprived you of everything good in life for…you’ve lost track of how long. You’ll take whatever you can get to make things more bearable around here.

And if that ‘whatever’ turns out to be a former top hero who was killed and resurrected into a horrid experiment, then so be it.

x---x---x---x---x

Subject: Raptor

Field Test

Quirk #2: Reptile

Notes: The Reptile quirk will make for a great upgrade to Raptor’s physical capabilities. He may possess wings, but the ability to climb almost any surface will be helpful in enclosed areas and improve his overall performances in stealth. A flexible spine allows him to comfortably be both bipedal and quadrupedal, the digitigrade legs granting him greater speed and jumps.

Also, someone needs to send in a request for a new pair of shorts for the damned thing.

There were many more instructions to follow this time. The Coats were bombarding him with one command after another.

“Climb up here.”

“Slash this with your talons.”

“Crush this with your hands. Try again with your feet.”

His head throbbed painfully as the voices took hold of his movements. They pushed his endurance to the limit when they made him run on a machine, first on his legs, then again on all fours. He was only running in place, but it was much more satisfying than pacing back and forth in that boring room.

It turns out that he can scale walls and ceilings with little effort thanks to the pads on his hands and feet. Maybe he can try drawing on the ceiling when he returns to his room. The only downside was that you wouldn’t be able to sit up there with him.

The Coats observed behind the (assumed) safety of a wall of thick glass. Each one possessed a small microphone so that their voice can still be heard clearly through the speaker on his side of the room.

They always watched him with cold and calculating eyes, and only spoke to him when telling him to do something. You feared him; his feathers easily sensed your tension, unsteady breaths, and quickening heartbeats, yet you still took the time to be friendly. And what you do with those hands…he wishes you’d make him feel that good all day. Yes, his room was small and boring, but it did have you.

“Raptor, to the opposite end of the room,” a Coat ordered. The sensation of being pulled by his entire head forced him to take his place at the wall, staring straight ahead at the door.

His wings twitched from a powerful approaching presence, feathers instinctively sharpening at the possible incoming threat. The door was opened by a small Coat to make way for a beast, a beast with a large powerful form and exposed brain just like him.

Vacant eyes stared straight ahead, looking right through him like it was dead on its feet.

“This is one of Cloner’s spawn, yes?” A female Coat spoke with her mouth close to the mic. He supposes that they don’t care if he hears them.

“Yes. His offspring always turn out even more unstable than him. This one can’t even produce a single proper clone, and no additional quirks were inherited. It’s useless.”

“Well, at least it’ll help us in its final moments.” The man leaned into his mic. “Raptor, kill the nomu. Do not use your wings.”

The woman followed up with her own order. “Nomu, kill Raptor.”

Blood was suddenly rushing through his body twice as fast, the reds of his eyes appearing and locking onto the target that was already charging at him with a horrifying wail.

Kill it.

He ducked under the bigger creature’s closing arms that would have likely trapped him into a crushing hug, causing his opponent to lose balance and fall forward. His hand shot up and dug his talons into thick flesh, slicing it from its chest all the way down to its stomach as he ran beneath. Rising from under the nomu’s legs, he turned to see his gruesome work.

Instead, he sees the blur of a fist right before it smashes into his face and sends him flying. His back colliding hard with the wall accompanied the shattering of his jaw. There was no time to wait for his vision to clear up, scrambling out of the path of the charging silhouette before it slams into the now-empty spot, the impact shaking the entire room.

The pain only intensified when his face and spine began to shift, mending itself back together while he tried his hardest to keep his eye on the much more violent beast. A ghoulish moan was heard as it straightened itself, and Raptor could see the large gash that should have easily disemboweled it already closing up.

Ah, so they can both heal.

It was already charging straight at him again. The thing was fast and powerful, but it was acting like it had a one-track mind, sticking to a simple strategy of running towards him and dealing whatever damage it could.

His wings twitched, but there was a barrier in his mind preventing them from moving. Damned Coats.

The fight became a game of evasion, darting and dashing around the bigger and stronger nomu’s swings and countering with deep slashes. Wearing it down was impossible with such rapid healing, every cut he brought upon its skin was quickly sewn shut.

His only chance was to attack its brain, but the nomu had enough sense to protect its one true vulnerable spot, nearly crushing Raptor’s arm into paste after an attempt to sink his talons into the soft matter.

So he kept dodging, and dodging, until something inside the creature just...snapped. Perhaps it was out of frustration in failing to land any hits, but its haunting moans and wails soon became full on screams. Tightly clenched fists pounded into the floor, the stone floor crumbling under the sudden tantrum. Raptor stood and watched, wings tensing from the burst of tortured emotions.

“Hm, you weren’t exaggerating about the meltdowns,” he heard one of the Coats say, her voice as dull as ever.

“What an embarrassment. Damn thing can’t even carry out a simple fight.”

Raptor looked behind the glass of spectators and saw faces of disappointment.

“A complete waste.”

“Cloner’s children are all wasted potential.”

“What a sad display.”

“Pathetic.”

He looked back at the creature that was now writhing and flailing, its skin oozing a blob that throbbed and squirmed, like it was trying its hardest to take a shape. 

But the bubbly pulses stop and the dripping mass melts into a lifeless puddle. The nomu continues to scream after its failed attempt at using its quirk. Raptor’s gut twists with pity.

A sad display, indeed.

“Raptor! Did you forget your orders? Kill him!” 

The sharp command smothers all feelings of sympathy, and before Raptor knew it, he was running toward the tormented creature, each feather on his tail sharpening with every step. Ducking under a blind swipe, the black spear thrusted forward and pierced its brain with a sickening shlunk.

The thrashing was reduced to short spasms as the nomu choked out its final groans, its terrified eyes glazing over when the last traces of life faded. 

The tail was yanked out and shook off the blood and spongy brain matter to splatter on the ground. Raptor gave a soft whine of distress.

“Well, that was all rather underwhelming.”

“Yep, that didn’t exactly challenge Raptor at all.”

“I’m concerned about his lack of aggression. Did you all see him hesitate?”

“Most likely just confusion and caution after witnessing such a sudden breakdown.”

So many voices, so many comments; Raptor paid no attention to them. His mind was on the corpse that continued to bleed heavily from the large gash in its head. Raptor was the stronger nomu. He won.

Was he supposed to feel proud? Victorious?

“He’s a very smart one. Did you see the markings in his room? He and his harvester have been...bonding.” That voice...Raptor recognized it as the Coat that showed up every morning to retrieve him from his room to enter these test rooms. “I can’t decide if I like the idea of a friendly nomu.”

The woman dismissed his worries. “As long as he knows to kill when he’s told, his behavior shouldn’t matter. But it might benefit us to test his relationship with his owner after we’ve finished observing his quirks.”

His throat vibrates as a low growl passes through.

Raptor doesn’t like it here.

x---x---x---x---x

Maybe it’s just because Friday (you’re pretty sure it’s Friday on your self-made calendar) tends to be your busiest day of the week, or that your wrist is beginning to wear down from the many giant dicks you’ve been stroking. Or maybe it’s just one of those days when you remember just how shitty this life was. Whatever it was, you weren’t in one of your best moods today. 

That’s why you felt just the smallest hint of excitement when you reached Hawks’s door. Yes, it’s weird, but he was the closest thing you had to a companion around here, alright? 

The last thing you expected was to open the door to an empty room, at least it appeared that way until you saw the black creature resting on the ceiling.

“Aah!” You yelp and drop the jar out of fright, causing Hawks to jump from the sudden noise. You curse and quickly pick up the container and scan it for any cracks while he gracefully twists his body to drop on the floor with a thud. He was as graceful as a cat...a cat that can comfortably sit upside down.

Relieved to see the jar in one piece, you turned your attention back to the waiting High End. “I didn’t know you could climb like that.”

His wings fluttered at the comment and he raised his palms right in front of your face. Ah yes, a hand. Very lovely. But looking more closely, you could see a difference in texture on the rounded pads of his fingertips. “Ooh, little sticky hairs, huh?”

He gave a click of what you assumed to be approval, tail swinging behind him.

“So I guess you’re not just born knowing everything your body can do. Sounds troublesome.” There’s something you wanted to do, something you wouldn’t ever consider doing with the other nomu even in your dreams. “May I, uh, touch them?” You held up your own hands innocently.

Hawks cocked his head, a gesture that you’re always going to find kinda cute, before grunting and bringing his larger hands to yours. All ten of your fingers made contact, and the slightest shiver shot down your spine. 

It’s the first time you’ve ever touched one of these monsters outside of jerking them to collect semen. Your curiosity was always there, but the disgust and fear you often felt when in their presence fueled the overpowering desire to hurry up, get the damn job done, and get away from them as quickly as possible.

You never imagined that you’d be standing face to face with a High End, feeling the surprisingly soft pads on his scaly hands, his breaths deep and hot against your face as those red irises watched your expressions. He was still very intimidating with his tall form, glowing glare, and the large imposing pair of wings. But those eyes—they contained too much intelligence and emotion in them.

Too human. It was as uncanny as it was fascinating. 

Only when his eyes close and he begins to croon softly do you realize that one of your hands have moved up to touch his face. The black skin feels extra thick when you gently press his cheek, strong and leathery. He leans in and brings his head closer to give you better access, and you can’t help but reward the reaction with scratches against his jaw and chin.

“You know, you’ve been doing a shitty job of acting like the ultimate killer,” you said when he purrs happily. 

The purr morphs into a disgruntled whine. “Don’t...like.”

Your hand pauses, hoping for him to elaborate as well as he could. “Don’t like…?” You encouraged him.

He was still struggling to work his vocal chords, but at least he seemed to be showing less pain. “Don’t like...k-killiiing.”

What?

“Raptor, that’s...you know...the very thing you were made for, and you don’t like doing it?” Not that you’re complaining about his gentle nature, but hearing a damn nomu say that he dislikes killing might be the most ludicrous thing you’ve heard here, even more so than the first time you were told to make an abomination cum.

His entire body stiffens, and you couldn’t help but tense up as well. “Maaade-” He makes a harsh hacking sound. “-to kill?”

Shit. You panic and attempt to backpedal. “Not to actually kill. You’re supposed to be, you know, the strongest creature that’s capable of killing whenever he wants...if you, uh, wanted to.” Yeah, that sounds good enough.

It appears to do the trick, his body relaxing again. “Don’t like,” he repeated more smoothly this time.

“I know, I know. Killing sucks. Just don’t tell the assholes in labcoats that, alright? Now calm down.” You return to your ministrations, this time using both hands to rub and scratch his face. His eyes drift shut again as your hands trail down to his slightly elongated neck, brushing past his steady pulse.

Reaching his collar and then his chest, you discover that he’s solid muscle everywhere. He may not be on the verge of bursting out of his own skin like the others, but he could no doubt snap you like a twig just as easily. You feel his chest heave from a deep breath, the strength emanating from his body making you shiver. You shush him when he jolts as your hands reach his pronounced abs, pushing against the hard muscle until you finally arrive at his groin.

You snorted at the new pair of shorts. “Another pair, huh? At least these look a little less ragged.”

You pulled his large member out for the third time. Why did you have to do this daily? What could they possibly be doing with so many jars of jizz? Making cakes?

Sighing, you brushed off the soreness of your arm and wrist and began to pump his ridged length. “Just do me a favor and try to cum quickly, alright?” 

He made a rather sad groan at that, curling into himself so that his face was close to yours. His sharp breaths were loud in your ears.

You couldn’t help but smile even through the strain of your muscles. “What, you wanna make this last? Do you know how many dicks I’ve had to tend to today? Cut me some slack, we’re gonna be doing this everyday, anyway.”

Hawks purrs before that monstrous voice shakes your body, his hot breath warming the side of your face and neck. “Feel gooood.”

The primal lust dripping from him triggers a pulse of warmth inside you. You...can’t remember the last time you’ve felt that, and it’s just a tad strange that a nomu caused it. Were you really that starved for attention? “I-” You cleared your throat after an awkward voice crack. “I know, handjobs tend to feel good. But please be a good boy and help me out here.”

He gives a puff that blows your hair back, but he complies. The big sweaty face that buries itself in your neck is so distracting that you almost forget to get your jar ready and fill it with the incoming spurts of semen. There, the final sample of the day has been collected. Now, if you could just push the panting fiend off of you before he starts drooling on your shoulder.

Something warm and slimy touches your neck. It has you pulling back so quickly that you almost fall and spill the vile essence all over you before the jar could be properly sealed.

Hawks shrinks back and quickly withdraws the indigo tongue into his mouth, looking down in what appears to be shame. You touch the licked spot, the thick saliva coating your fingers. 

“Sss-sorrry.” Regret can be heard clearly in his droning voice.

“No, it’s...it’s okay,” you stammer. The sensation lingers, and then ignites a spark somewhere inside you.

A sick, disgusting, and absolutely fucked up spark. The next thing you say should horrify you, but instead you feel nothing but a twisted form of anticipation. “You can...um...do that again, if you want.”

His tail slapped the floor in excitement before he slowly closed the distance again, cautiously looking into your eyes before his tongue slithers out and caresses the same wet space.

The smooth muscle is hot against you, extending to inhuman lengths to explore your neck. The slick sounds as it slid across your skin should have grossed you out—all of this should be grossing you out, so you don’t understand why you tilt your head back to give him more room. He licks up and down your throat slowly to savor your taste, breathing heavily and releasing a stale stench from his open maw. You imagined the breath of a previously dead man to smell a hundred times worse, frankly. 

With your neck completely drenched in his cooling slobber, he ventures upward, purring louder than ever as he tastes the flesh of your jaw. The tapered end of his tongue begins to curiously flick at your earlobe before circling around the shell of your ear. He seems to take a liking to the flabby cartilage and laps at it playfully while giving the occasional nip and suck and god, it’s all heard so fucking clearly, every schlick and smack traveling right through your canal and setting off questionable reactions all over you. Your hands are clenched and held against your chest, but you don’t tell him to stop.

‘What the hell is wrong with me?’

The licking moves to your cheek, lapping at it shortly before moving to your pursed lips.

‘This is fucked up beyond words.’

You flinch when the clammy tongue brushes over your lips, at first smoothing over them lightly, possibly testing to see how you’d react. His face is so close, your noses almost touching. To allow a nomu this close to you, touching you like this…

When you make no move of resistance, he gets braver and laps at your mouth with controlled eagerness. Your eyes close to hide from the otherworldly gaze, but your lips feel even more sensitive to the weight that continues flicking and pressing at them, covering them in hot saliva. Several times does it briefly part your lips and graze your teeth, making you swallow at the thought of…

‘Don’t do that.’

Hawks pauses when you open up for him, but gives a gleeful chirp and snakes his way into your inviting mouth.

‘I’m really letting him do this.’

Clawed hands grab your arms a little too tightly and hold you in place. It hurts, yet all you can focus on is the flexible muscle exploring your mouth. It rubbed against the roof, pushed at the inside of your cheeks, and eventually stroked and curled around your own tongue.

‘You’re sick.’

But you’ve been sick ever since you got here, haven’t you?

When his grip loosens, you take the opportunity to place your hands around his head, digging your fingers into his...hair? Plumage? Was his hair always this feather-like?

A high-pitched sound of surprise leaves him when you try to pull him in closer. He quickly complies, closing the distance until his lips and mouth are covering yours.

It completely smothers your senses. You see his black wings expand to slowly encase both of you. You hear the wet friction of his tongue and the hungry growls that roll from his throat. You smell sweat and blood, briefly wondering just what exactly was he made to do during those ‘tests’. You taste the thick and flavorless saliva that makes you gag at first, but becomes easier to swallow as you take in more. And most of all, you feel him slowly moving in and out of your wide open mouth, the thrusting motion forcing your thighs to rub together in response to the growing heat threatening to consume you.

You snap out of it before that can happen.

Hawks pulls away when he hears your choked sounds of protest, your hands suddenly on his chest and pushing. Fresh oxygen rushes back into your lungs when his tongue leaves your mouth and retreats back into his. The warmth between your legs doesn’t fade away. Everything that just happened, everything you just allowed this monster to do fully sinks in.

And you fucking enjoyed it.

You back away from him as quickly as you can, ignoring his confused groans. A wave of nausea sweeps over you like a powerful gust that churns your stomach.

“Rest. I need to go.” It was all you said before you picked up the forgotten jar and fled the room, refusing to falter from the sorrowful whines behind you.

The urge to spew the little food you’ve been fed throughout the day all over the hallway floor is strong, but you manage to hold out until you reach the toilet in your room, quickly kneeling and hurling. It wasn’t much, but it still left you teary-eyed and with a burning throat.

What did you do? Just what the hell did you do that warranted getting kidnapped, having your nice comfortable life stolen from you, and the only way to cope was by making out with a horrid creature? You jolt from a painful mix of a sob and a hiccup. It’s been weeks since your last breakdown, but this new discovery was another hard blow to your sanity and pride. You let the tears flow as you flushed away your mess, moving over to your bed and collapsing onto the thin mattress. Fuck this facility. Fuck the scum that created all of this.

And fuck the throbbing wetness between your legs that still won’t go away.

Your sobs transform into humorless laughs. You’re going to have to get rid of the throbbing yourself, aren’t you? They won’t arrive to collect all of your samples for about another thirty minutes, so that should be enough time...

You pulled down the thin blue pants and rubbed your fingers over the slick that had gathered from what had transpired in Hawks’s room. It’s true, you’ve been doing nothing but sick shit since you’ve been tossed into this new life. Why do you even still hold on to feelings like shame and disgust? What good will they do you here?

So you try to drown out the voice of your conscience as you laid back, succumbing to the wonderfully twisted thoughts of a nomu’s tongue.

x---x---x---x---x

Subject: Raptor

Examination

Quirk #3: Regeneration

Quirk#4: Heat Resistance

Notes: Our most advanced specimens deserve the best healing quirks we have to offer. Raptor is no exception. It will also make up for his lack of weight and hard muscle, not that he should ever be mistaken as frail. Most importantly, this should accelerate the regrowth of his feathers and supply him with an endless arsenal. We do not want to risk his regeneration being hindered by burns. After all, it was fire that led to the host’s death. This is why we have added a quirk that should make it almost completely fireproof.

The only people that Raptor disliked more than the Coats, were the Masks. The Coats saw him as nothing more than an attack dog that is expected to obey every command. But the humans in masks...to them, he was just a fleshy object to be dissected and analyzed.

They were poking and cutting to their heart’s content. His mind screamed to get away from the assortment of blades and needles that hovered over him, sinking into his skin in various places while he could only writhe against the cuffs of the metal table he was strapped to. He doesn’t believe it’s their intention to test every ounce of his willpower, but that sure as hell is what they’re doing right now as he tries, really tries not to use his feathers out of desperation.

“Excellent. The cuts begin healing the moment they’re made,” one of them observes. “Try deeper incisions. Maybe I should try removing one of its eyes.”

Raptor’s heartbeat was booming in his ears after hearing those words.

A younger Mask has been flinching from every one of the nomu’s movements. “Shouldn’t we sedate it or something? What if it lashes out?”

“Stop panicking. A nomu won’t hurt anyone without orders, though his responses to pain are stronger than I expected. We may have to fix that.”

Raptor wouldn’t mind that at all. He hisses and howls as he’s taken apart and mended back together in a torturous loop. His brain is throbbing so strongly one would worry that it might burst. He fights to think through all of the agony. 

He thinks of your touch. He thinks of your taste. Were you repulsed by what he did that morning? 

Sharp pain shot through his wings when his feathers were being forcefully yanked out, his teeth on the verge of shattering from his tightly clenched jaws.

“Perfect! Look at that, they’re already growing back in.” 

They were. He could feel the fresh plumes pushing through his skin. The regeneration did well in preventing any real damage, but it didn’t make the violent tearing of his feathers any easier to bear.

The cruel assault on his wings and tail eventually ended, black fluff littering the room’s floor. He remembers when you mentioned other nomu being capable of shutting down whenever they wanted. What he wouldn’t give to just turn off like a light switch right now.

“Alright, it’s time to move on to his heat resistance. Get the torch.”

The what? Raptor searched the fragments of his knowledge; most words were familiar to him, they just took a while to be remembered from...something. He doesn’t understand how he already knows so much, even though his subconsciousness needs time to dust everything off.

One of the Masks was holding a small object that ended in a tube. With a push of a button, a small blue flame appeared.

The glowing yellow eyes that were normally slits were suddenly wider than he thought possible, every part of him hyper focused on the small fire that was getting too close to his sore wings. His mind recovered a new piece of information:

Blue flames are to be feared.

He was thrashing the second the searing pain was felt, fighting to escape, to get away from the blue death that threatened to incinerate his wings again. He has felt this before. He doesn’t want to burn again.

Panic consumed him, unaware of how much his feathers have sharpened as he beats his wings and tail against the table. He can barely hear the Masks’ frantic voices over the ear-splitting screech, a screech that he realizes is coming from his own strained throat.

“–ptor, I SAID STOP!”

“–y arm! Fuck, my arm is bleeding bad–”

“–old you he’d attack! Why is he reacting so–”

“–atives! Into his neck! Hurry!”

Needles are being jammed into his neck, the chemicals working quickly in sapping away his strength, limbs becoming too heavy to move, and his thoughts were too cloudy to even continue panicking. The scorching heat was still present in his wing, but he can still feel the presence of all of his feathers. There was no foul smell of burnt plumage.

“Aaaugh, my arm...” In the corners of his vision, Raptor saw one of the Masks hunched over and clutching a blood-soaked arm. He didn’t mean to hurt any of them.

“Shut up and go patch yourself up.” An older man motioned the rest to come closer to the calmed nomu, which they cautiously obeyed. “Do you all see it? His feathers aren’t damaged at all. Perfect.”

“But why didn’t he stop resisting after you ordered him several times? And why was his reaction to pain so strong?”

The elder grimaced behind his mask and shook his head. “Its pain tolerance is laughable. There’s no use in a nomu having such sensitivity. We’ll need to perform an operation that will dull his nerves.” 

They scrambled around the table, gathering new tools and focusing the creaky hanging light on Raptor’s face. He was too doped up to even react to the harsh brightness.

“And if he ignores us like that again, we may need to alter his brain and ensure his compliance in the future.”

The nomu tried to make a sound of protest, but in his dazed state he could give no more than a pathetic whimper. He was rather thankful of the drugs for making him unable to notice just how many needles were sinking into his brain, or the blades that opened up the rest of his head, keeping the tools in place to prevent his skull from instantly healing. It still hurt, a lot. But as they tweaked his pulsing organ, injecting unknown fluids inside, the pain began to dim. Raptor would have celebrated and attempted to wag his tail in relief.

But it wasn’t the only thing that was fading. The coldness of the metal at his back was becoming distant, the chill in the air of the room was suddenly so faint that it no longer made him shiver. 

He wanted it all to hurt less, but he still wanted to feel. 

He has no idea how much time had passed once they finally finished and allowed his bone and flesh to close up. The old Mask stared down at him, gloves drenched in thick crimson.

“That should do it. Going by your weaker reactions, the operation was a success and you now feel less sensation. Good.”

‘No. Not good.’ It’s what he was tempted to say, but Raptor didn’t want to utter a single word to anyone besides you, and the cruel man’s recent threat of robbing him of his free will ensured that he keeps his mouth shut.

Raptor hates it here.

x---x---x---x---x

There were fresh claw marks covering the walls of Hawks’s room, and this time they were angry. The drawings and games you made together were literally slashed out, with spots of blood spread out all over the floor.

He was curled up in a corner, wings concealing most of his shaking form.

“Raptor.” Firmly addressing him is usually all it takes to gain his full attention, just like any other nomu, High End or not.

Hawks doesn’t respond at all.

That’s new...and very unnerving.

You called him again. The mass of feathers didn’t budge. You swallowed a lump in your throat. He had clearly just thrown a violent tantrum, and you don’t know if he has fully calmed down yet. Approaching him is too risky, but the damn nomu won’t even acknowledge you. So you’ll have to get through him in a more natural way. 

“Raptor, is everything alright? Do you, um, need some space? I can come back a little later...maybe another thirty minutes or so.” You offered, your body slightly twisting toward the door, ready to bolt if he decided to attack. You ignored the cold hard fact that the door and your legs would do little in protecting you from him.

His tail slowly uncurls like a timid snake, wings following suit and revealing his shrunken form. He was hugging himself tightly, talons peeling the skin off of his biceps. His head hung low, but you can see the spot of red in each eye looking right at you. He looked like an angry and frightened child, and his pitiful plea didn’t help matters.

“Don’t...go.”

His vulnerable state quelled your fears, but you still took caution. “Can I come closer?”

He looks down at the floor for a moment, seemingly pondering the question, before straightening his posture and nodding. 

You follow the routine you’ve been getting used to with him, setting aside the jar and taking some time to talk. “Now tell me what’s wrong.”

It was supposed to compel him to instantly explain the issue, or at least attempt to with his awkward speech. You instead see him flinch and growl lowly, as if he didn’t appreciate you making demands. Just what is going on with him?

Your anxiety was probably visible since he quickly switched back to a less aggressive stance. You wince when he drags a claw through his flesh, blood leaking out for only a second before the wound instantly repairs itself. “Can’t feel.” He weeps with cracks in his unnatural voice. At least he’s dragging out his words less and sounds less like a moaning zombie.

“You can’t feel?” You repeated, edging closer and placing a hand over the healed spot. Another growl, louder this time, scares you into pulling away. But his bigger hand seizes yours and presses it hard onto the black skin. You feel the tremors that begin to wrack his body and try to stay calm in the wake of his growing distress. 

His voice becomes only more broken. “Can’t feel it! Can’t feel you!”

You find yourself shushing him, holding your free hand up like you’re trying to calm a panicking animal. You cup the side of his face, but that seems to upset him even more. “You can’t feel my hand?”

He shuts his eyes and shakes his head, squeezing your hand tightly enough to cut off circulation. How freely he can emote still freaks you out a bit, face looking on the verge of shedding tears. Everything about him continues to be so surreal.

“Raptor, you’re a shitty nomu,” you told him with a small smile. “Not that I mind.”

And there goes that cute head tilt. The thought of him being released in a city to wreak havoc, just like the one that attacked Endeavor and...him, feels less possible after every meeting.

He was still powerful and potentially dangerous, if the state of the walls were anything to go by. You really shouldn’t be pushing your luck or his temper. On the other hand, you did decide yesterday that from now on, you are going to embrace the depraved dumbass within you. Hawks stiffens and starts to slowly pull back, but your hand makes its way to the back of his head. “It’s alright, it’s alright,” you soothed him. “I just want to see if you can feel any of this.”

With no more hesitation, you pressed your lips to his, feeling his shock through a surprised grunt. For a minute, you simply cover his rough lips with kisses while he stays completely still, eyes looking on the verge of bulging right out of their sockets. It looked downright silly. Why was he so shocked by a simple kiss anyway, after the way you let him ravage your mouth yesterday? 

Your lips pause when you remember the distraught sounds he made that morning as he watched you rush out of the room. That’s right.

“Hey,” you murmur against him. “Sorry for taking off like that last time. Just...don’t worry about it, okay.” He released a hot breath onto your face. Your trapped hand is finally freed from his iron grip, numb and stiff, but you keep your attention on the motionless nomu. “We’re not exactly supposed to be doing this, but I want you t-mmf!”

He suddenly went forward and attacked your lips, aggressively mimicking your movements with enough force to bruise. You try to keep up and calm his pace, sighing into his mouth once his lips finally begin to slow down. He’s clumsy like you expected, but his intelligence shows when he tries to follow your lead and quickly learns the intimate dance of your mouths. The occasional swipe of that blasted tongue across your lip makes you gasp, and then you feel big strong arms wrapping around you and pulling you close, the beats of his excited wings, the throaty growls that rattle your entire being…

You can feel yourself heating up again already.

“Mmm, Raptor...wait,” you manage to say between kisses, your hands pushing against his chest. He gives a grating sound of annoyance, but pulls away like you wished. You were suddenly hyper aware of his size and strength – this monster that was holding you closely and taking care not to harm you. If any other nomu had you like this, they undoubtedly wouldn’t have stopped.

“So, did you feel any of that?” Your hand travels down to his groin and rubs at the bulge that still had a lot of growing to do. “Do you feel that?”

To your dismay, he shakes his head. “No,” he groans as his wings droop closer to the floor. 

It has you stumped. How are you supposed to please him when his whole body is numb?

“But…” He licks his lips slowly. “Can still taste. Tastes so good.”

When you let him lap at your lips again, he twitches beneath the ragged cloth.

You put two and two together, and the realization makes you gulp. And ache.

Remember, shame is useless here.

He allows you to back away and create some distance. The sight before you is frightening on its own: The sharp stare of the raven-winged fiend while surrounded by the deep marks of its outburst would do well in intimidating any sane individual. Remembering what exactly he is makes you pause only for a second, your hands grabbing the bottom of your thin blue shirt and lifting it before your pesky conscience can even get a word in.

Hawks’s wings flare out slightly when your breasts are revealed to him, talons clicking against the floor as he shuffles about, at a loss of how to react. Relieved that you haven’t been pounced on immediately, you lean down to remove your pants next, ignoring the trembling in your hands as you pull the garment down and step out of them. They never supplied you with underwear, so with your two articles of clothing removed, you were completely nude in front of the dangerous nomu.

At first you both just stared at each other, until he finally came forward to scan your body more closely, mindful of how nervous you were. The tension made you almost choke and cough on your words.

“I-if you want to…taste more of me, go ahead.” You didn’t mean to squeak out those last two words. You blame it on the chilly air.

The hands that take hold of your hips feel extra hot, along with the breath that grazes your chest. The blue tongue slides past his lips and extends to press against the spot right over your pounding heart, then moving smoothly up the column of your neck and your cheek in one long swipe, the wet trail making you shudder. The mouth ventures close to your ear to utter the word that you remember repeating to him on the first day you got him off.

“Calm.”

It’s followed by a rolling purr that eases you into doing just that. The humming continues while he eyes your breasts, nipples already pert from being exposed to the air. Even in your more relaxed state, the sudden lick across your tit makes your breath hitch. He seems to enjoy your response and repeats the action, giving it several more laps before wrapping around the entirety of the soft globe like a tentacle, squeezing gently.

“Ah, Raptor,” you moan when the tip of the tongue flicks at your nipple, sending the tiniest of jolts through you. “Damn, where did you learn to do that?” 

He answers with nothing more than a groan as he continues to show off his tongue’s flexibility. It coils and swirls around the skin until every inch of it is covered in his saliva, making you even more sensitive to the cold air. Satisfied with his work, he moves on to repeat the motions with your other breast.

The pleasure was soothing, like a massage…if the masseuse had sticky boneless limbs. You close your eyes and wrap your arms around him, letting yourself enjoy the vile act of a monster sampling your taste. 

His mouth suddenly engulfs you, the damp heat adding to the ongoing feeling of his tongue dancing around your tit. The purrs abruptly become a powerful vibration that electrifies your skin and brings forth your moisture to drip and run down your thighs.

But Hawks suddenly pulls away and stares at you intensely, the glower snapping you out of your daze.

“What is it?” You were getting nervous again. Did one of your reactions irritate him?

He breathes in, again and again, sniffing at the air for something. The swaying tail hints that whatever he smells is exciting him. His head lowers in pursuit of the scent and stops at your womanly mound to take a long whiff at the spicy aroma emanating from your cunt.

With his breath now blowing right against your sex and increasing your arousal, your juices trickled freely onto the floor and for him to see. The clawed hands on your hips held you steady, preventing you from collapsing from the nerve-racking anticipation that had you shaking all over. At no point in your life have you ever felt this exposed, being ogled by a pair of eyes in which the irises were bigger than you’ve ever seen them, mesmerized by the source of the delicious smell.

The tongue slips between your thighs before you could even prepare yourself, stretching across the entirety of your lips, over your entrance, nearly reaching your ass before it pulls back toward his mouth, the rubbing of the silky muscle creating buzzes of pleasure. Looking down gives you the unpleasant view of his brain, but you also get to see him swallow and savor your taste, humming deeply in approval before salivating with the need to drink up more.

“Good.”

He doesn’t wait for your response – his face is already being shoved into you, and you’re suddenly bombarded with delightful hot sensations all over your pussy. The ravenous organ travels up and down your folds, collecting every drop of your sweet nectar while you could do nothing but spread your legs to give him more leeway – God you’re such a whore – and cover your mouth in the hope that no passerbys hear your moans in the room. 

When your legs officially become jelly and can no longer support you, Hawks tires of holding you up and allows you to fall back a little too hard onto the floor, the impact making you wince. Any other time, he probably would have at least made a sound of apology, but your sopping wet pussy has stolen his attention. He wastes no time in lifting your hips up toward his waiting mouth, now utilizing his lips along with his tongue to loudly slurp up your essence.

His vicious hunger has you seeing stars. Wings open up and expand around both of you like black curtains that darken your vision, like a bird of prey mantling over a hard-earned meal. The only thing you can clearly see between your legs are the eerie glows of red and yellow; the glare of a demon that seeks to devour you from the inside. He starts to suck your folds dry, growling as he inspects every inch of the ravaged honeypot until his lips brush against your neglected clit.

A muffled “fuck!” passes between your fingers, both of your hands tightly clamped over your mouth. The reaction surprises him, and to his delight, it triggers more of your nectar to flow. The most efficient gag wouldn’t have been enough to suppress your scream when he sucked hard on your sensitive bud.

You couldn’t help it. Fighting past the paralyzing pleasure, your hands blindly grab at his head and accidentally bury your fingers into a soft squishy brain. The discomfort makes him shake his head and groan in irritation, raising his head and narrowing those menacing eyes at you as a silent warning.

“Hah...shit...I’m sor–AH! Fuck-oh my god....” He’s already attacking your clit again before you can finish your apology. All he cares about at the moment is your taste, and not even you were going to interrupt him. The surrounding wings occasionally twitch and shudder around you, vibrating along with your approaching climax. But the second you feel dangerously close, his lips leave the perky little pebble and move back down to lap at your fresh flow. It tears you away from an orgasmic finale and brings you back to that sensual middle ground. The audible licks were amazing, but you need to reach that edge. Your hand drifted down to your pussy, right over his tongue where you can give your clit the stimulation needed to cum…

“Hwrrrrrrr…”

You felt the terrifying snarl more than you heard it, shaking you to your very core. The other core, not the one on the verge of bursting. You immediately pull away and freeze, shivering and breathing quickly at the sight of his bared fangs. For a brief moment, the tent of feathers showed off a faint sheen, like they all suddenly sharpened. A quivering, fear-fueled gasp left you. 

It felt like the staredown went on forever, but Hawks was eventually convinced that you weren’t going to distract him from his feast again and returned his gaze to the fragrant pussy before him. However, after a few more licks, he grunted in frustration. You weren’t secreting your precious juices fast enough; your body simply couldn’t keep up with his newfound greed.

The insatiable tongue keeps poking and prodding at your opening until it pushes in just enough to slightly stretch your walls. You struggle to stay relaxed and keep your hands to yourself. Hawks was currently as unpredictable as any other nomu, and you didn’t want to piss him off.

When the hot thick muscle is suddenly shoved into you, you don't even have time to cover your mouth and block the next scream that is ripped from your throat. There’s no time to adjust to the completely foreign sensation. It squirms inside of you like a living creature, massaging your pussy in ways you didn’t even know were possible, sometimes hitting that special soft spot.

Your molten center spreads its flames across every nerve. This is far beyond what you fantasized on the night you touched yourself. His tongue was able to fill you completely, all while moving around more freely than a cock or even fingers ever could. Too soon does it leave your pulsing walls and back into his mouth, where he swallows every drop he’s gathered before shooting his tongue back out and penetrating you again before you can even complain.

He was moving with more force, enough to create a visible swell in your stomach that moved along with his tongue. You can’t look away from it, even as he begins to push in and out at a steady rhythm, the pleasure building up to new heights while the bulge in your belly moves up and down. You’re tempted to ask him to move his wings to allow more light for a better view, but interrupting him now is probably a stupid idea.

He pants loudly from his open mouth as he fucks you thoroughly with nothing more than a long powerful tongue, his thrusts moving faster and deeper in search of more of your savory wetness.

Meanwhile, you were dizzy. It was uncomfortable at first. It’s been so long since you’ve been fully stretched, but it all quickly melds into pleasure you have long since forgotten – no – you hadn’t even known. Your interest in sex has greatly diminished during your stay here. Hell, you were certain that your libido was officially dead. But Hawks….

This abomination was going to be the death of you.

Your g-spot is suddenly struck again, and again. Most of your words were incoherent, and the ones that could be made out were nothing more than endless encouragement.  “Gah-hnngh, fuck, Hawks, you want more, don’t you? Ah, I’m about to give you more. Keep going Hawks don’t fucking stop.” 

Talons are biting into your skin from his tightened grip. With a low bellow of excitement, his mouth moves to cover your entire sex, prepared for the incoming downpour, and thrusts his tongue into your most sensitive spot repeatedly without mercy.

The pressure within explodes violently, completely overshadowing that laughable orgasm you gave yourself yesterday. Each contraction adds more white that flashes in your eyes, moving in from the corners of your vision until it becomes as blinding and unbearable as the bliss that washes over you. There are noisy gulps between your legs, the parched monster happily taking every rush of fluid directly into his mouth and down his throat until he finally has his fill.

Even through your spasms your walls try desperately to clamp around his tongue as it leaves, but to no avail. The looming wings finally move away and return to their usual resting spot behind his back while he sets your lower body down and licks his lips for any remaining traces of your slick. The talons never broke your skin, but they did leave some glaring marks on your hips and ass.

You still tingled all over from the waist down while your muscles make the greatest effort to respond to any of your commands. No use. You decide to lay there covered in the monster’s spit. The work of that amazing specimen of a tongue almost made you forget that this was being done to arouse him. You should probably check to see if he was hard. He may not be able to feel your hand anymore, but he still might be excited enough to cum from the act. Stupid science bastards, making your job more complicated.

“Hawks.”

The single word uttered from the nomu clears your mind instantly. Your weakened arms push you upright to properly face him. He was still crouching, scaly toes supporting the weight of his body like a gargoyle without a perch.

“You say Hawks. What...is Hawks?”

What? When did you…?

Oh. Shit. Your mouth was moving on its own while he was eating you out.

Your mind was zipping in several directions at once, hoping that he wouldn’t find anything odd about your eyes darting about, looking everywhere except at him. You settled on a simple and dismissive answer. “Oh...don’t worry about it. I was just babbling while you had me on cloud nine,” you said with a crooked smile.

Black lips twisted into a frown, accompanied by a quick beat of his wings and then...eww. His brain is pulsing way too much, so much that he shakes his head in agitation, which only adds to the disturbing visual as the organ jiggles slightly in his head. “Hawks...don’t know...I know…” His words jumbled over his inner turmoil. The long tail lifted and began to swing quickly.

You sat there, nude and bewildered. Every High-End still carried traces of who they once were, expressing some of the same behaviors and habits they presumably had before death.

This is the first time you’ve seen one with any sort of recollection of their past life, even if it’s something as minor as feeling a connection to their name. You have a feeling that’s not supposed to happen.

You shouldn’t tell him anything; nothing good will come out of it. He needs to shut up and start being a bloodthirsty killer before the doctors decide that he’s more trouble than he’s worth.

“Raptor,” your shaky legs move slowly, shifting until you’re resting on your knees, face to face with the nomu that still looks interested in your naked body even as his head throbs. “It’s not important. Stop thinking about it.”

The look he gives you is one of hurt and dammit, this is exactly his problem. “But...Hawks. Want to know what-”

“I said stop thinking!”  Your volume shocks both of you, but Hawks actually recoils from the unexpected shout. You don’t care, all it does is confuse you more, anger you more. “Why the hell aren’t you listening to me anymore? That’s what you’re supposed to do! Do whatever we tell you! What, did you break?” A full-body chill reminds you of the state you’re in. You were seriously having an outburst while still completely naked with Hawks’s saliva glistening over your thighs. You groan and turn away from the troubled hybrid to grab your clothes and dress yourself, not giving a damn if you pissed him off and he decides to kill you right there. He’d be doing both of you a favor, really.

But it shouldn’t be a surprise when you see that he hasn’t budged from his spot, making no move to retaliate. “I like you, Raptor,” you admitted. “Somehow, you managed to be the only welcomed company in this fucked up hospital slash prison, but you shouldn’t be. What we just did...that shouldn’t have happened. Fuck, I – I should’ve been terrified, and I kinda was, but, I shouldn’t have felt that good!” Your doubts, your conscience, they both return with a vengeance. But this time it’s not you they’re worried about. 

“If this is how you act around everyone else, you’re not going to last here.” You hold his face in your hands, a tender gesture that shouldn’t be possible with the likes of him. “These assholes are gonna get rid of you if you don’t do what they want, and they’re going to ask for horrible things. I know you don’t like killing, but if you keep up all of...this, you’re going to lose more than your sense of touch.”

He doesn’t make a sound, only staring at you before gritting his teeth and nodding in your gentle grasp. His compliance both relieves and hurts you.

“I’m sorry, but no more questions. Please? The less you know, the better.”

“No more…questions.” Dammit, you hate how clear the sorrow is in his eerie voice, like the mournful moans of a lost soul. “No more.”

You give him a smile of thanks, it’s the least you could give him. You try to bring the atmosphere back to its usual awkward yet friendly vibe. “Now, let me see if your, um, tasting did you any good.” You move to pull down his shorts. That is, until you notice the large damp spots and stains on the cheap material. Oh, he did not.

“Welp, it obviously worked. Now how am I gonna scrape this shit off?”

x---x---x---x---x

Hawks.

Flames.

Decay.

Death. Everywhere.

But, somehow, he knew it wasn’t his doing. 

Maybe he did kill a few...he wasn’t sure. It’s all so blurry and nauseating. 

Was he killing people? Was he…trying to save them? A monster like him, saving people?

“No more questions.”

Your voice echoes, bouncing across the shattered fragments of his mind. Raptor tries to obey. He doesn’t know what this Hawks is, or why it keeps plaguing him.

Whatever Hawks was, it’s gone. Raptor wants it to leave him alone.

x---x---x---x---x

Subject: Raptor

Field Test

Quirk #5: Camouflage

Notes: As you know by now, Raptor differs from other nomu in that he is designed for agility and stealth. An invisibility quirk will not only make Raptor into the perfect phantom, it can also assist in infiltration and spying. While the quirk may be called ‘camouflage’ mainly due to how it changes skin pigmentation, it does much more than match the colors of the environment. It hides the user’s entire form as perfectly as any true invisibility quirk. Raptor should be more than capable of destroying targets without ever being noticed.

You were right. It was strange how he doesn’t discover these ‘quirks’ on his own. It was an understatement to say that he was a little lost when a Coat ordered him to activate his Camouflage. Raptor was prepared to feel those words bind his limbs and move him against his will. Whenever his brain was under the Coats’ control, he was capable of doing whatever they asked, even when he himself didn’t understand what they were asking for.

So it was worrying when he felt nothing. He heard the order loud and clear, yet it didn’t wrap around his brain like it always does. 

So it wasn’t just you. His mind no longer submitted to anyone’s commands. He would have chirped in celebration if he didn’t have an audience that was still waiting for him to follow through, giving looks and comments of impatience while he stood there. 

He can’t let them notice that he was unaffected. The words of the Mask that stole his touch repeated in his head along with the memories of cutting and burning, every nerve seething from raw pain until all feeling began to fade.

“If he ignores us like that again, we may need to alter his brain and ensure his compliance in the future.”

Alter...change...he doesn’t want them to change him. So Raptor tried to pretend, another thing that felt natural to him. 

The process of finding his new quirk was difficult to describe; it was more like willing himself to blend in until the rest of his body got the message. All of his muscles tightened, and he almost panicked when black skin began to disappear before his eyes. His wings, his tail, every part of him looked as if it was dissolving, but he can still move and feel the weight of each limb. Once his body relaxed, he was fully invisible. The Coats kept him pinned with their stares, however.

“Completely hidden. Very good,” one of them said, writing something down. They’re always watching, always taking notes on him, always judging. This all felt familiar as well. “Now, walk from that corner to there, and keep a hold on your quirk.”

There was no pull, no sudden fuzziness or loss of control. Nothing. It’s a strange feeling, following orders because he actually chooses to. It will take some getting used to, but it shouldn’t be too difficult. 

Has a monster like him ever acted before? It sure feels like it.

He performed several different tasks: running, climbing, flying, and shooting feathers. All while unseen by the naked eye. The feat even earned him a round of applause from the Coats.

“I can picture it already. He could slice apart an entire group of targets, and they wouldn’t even understand their deaths. A flurry of invisible blades!” One of them exclaimed with a smile that was way too wide given the subject matter.

“Don’t worry, we’re going to get a taste of what this is capable of right now.”

Right on cue, the doors opened. Every feather on his wings and tail bristled instantly, ready to shred whatever possible threat that may enter. They wouldn’t be able to see him. It would be so easy, just like the Coats said.

But instead of another nomu that was simpler and more violent than him, a woman was shoved into the room hard enough to make her stumble forward and fall, the door slamming shut behind her. She was dressed like you, wearing only a thin blue shirt and pants. What did they bring someone like her in here for?

She was already back on her feet, scanning the area with wide eyes and shrunken pupils before moving her gaze to the humans that continued to observe from the other side. The fear in the air was so thick that Raptor could nearly taste it as she shook uncontrollably – he wondered if her knees would collapse from the trembling alone.

He was still camouflaged; she couldn’t see him at all. The urge to reveal himself is strong, but one: the Coats had yet to order him to deactivate his quirk, and two: knowing that she was in a room with a nomu will most definitely only terrify her more, so he stayed where he was, motionless and quiet.

For a suffocating minute, the only sound was her rapid breathing until one of the Coats finally spoke up.

“Kill her, Raptor.”

“What?” The woman’s voice was constricted by anxiety. She looked timidly at the man, who only stared back expectantly, waiting for something. “W-what?” She choked out again. She switched her attention to the door, still distressed and shaking. When no horrid beast entered the room like she expected, her panic increased even more, stuttering so badly that it was a challenge to discern what she was trying to say. “I-I-I w-I won’t...I’m s-so...p-p-please.” 

Her head whipped upwards to a vent in the ceiling. Nothing happened. The confused woman was now spinning around looking for something, hysterical with the knowledge that her impending doom was coming, but not knowing where or when. The weight of her dread was making him anxious.

The same Coat, however, only sighed in annoyance at the sight of the trapped panicking animal. “Don’t dawdle, Nomu.” The final word dripped with venom. It reminded him of his place: a puppet that should have no will of its own. Raptor didn’t want to kill, but if he defies them, then they will dig into his brain again, and the woman will probably be violently killed by a more enthusiastic nomu. He’s afraid of what they might take from him next. He can’t let that happen.

The shrinking woman is still whipping her head around in every direction as her bare feet take a step backwards, then another, completely unaware of the larger creature that stood right behind her. He can’t guarantee a painless death, but he can make it as quick as possible for her.

Raptor added an edge to some of his feathers, but reconsidered. That would require pinpoint accuracy, not worth the risk with a target that was moving so erratically.

His tongue curiously ran over the points of his teeth, checking their sharpness. No, that would leave too much of a mess.

His hands clenched into fists, and that’s when he practically heard the ding in his head. A simple method, but it should work just fine.

He was originally going to wait until she backed all the way into him, but that would be rather cruel. Killing her before she even recognizes the danger is a greater mercy. His hand struck with the swiftness of a snake, grabbing the back of her neck. The delicate spine could be felt beneath.

Raptor was not as strong as other nomu. That didn’t mean he couldn’t crush a human’s bones with little effort.

He felt her jolt, but that’s all she had time to do before the sickening snap and crunch sounded throughout the room, then she went limp with nothing more than a few final twitches.

Some of the Coats audibly gasped, while others clapped excitedly at the kill they couldn’t even see coming. From their perspective, an unsuspecting woman’s neck was suddenly crushed by an invisible force like an aluminum can.

One of them didn’t look very impressed. “Eh, a bit anticlimactic, don’t you think?”

“We’re not watching a bloodsport,” another one snapped. “Raptor is designed to handle matters quickly. A cervical fracture is fast and effective.”

“She was so terrible at her job. I think she deserved a terrible death in return,” another said. 

Their babbling continued while Raptor placed the body on the floor more gently than his audience would have liked. Her eyes were still wide open, frozen in that moment of realization just a millisecond before death. Still, things could have been much worse for her. 

“I still think we should have used his harvester instead. She’s becoming a nuisance.”

Raptor has grown to really dislike that voice, the voice of the man that takes him away every morning. He always stares at him like an expensive possession that turned out to be a waste of money. It’s an effort to keep his lips from curling over his teeth whenever the bastard’s around.

An older lady spoke. “Her relationship with the nomu is unique and warrants its own set of experiments after we cover the basics here. We already told you that.”

“Yes yes, I know. But her sample this morning was pathetic. It’s like she’s forgotten her job, too busy turning our greatest achievement into a softie. Call me petty, but I’d get a good laugh out of watching her be devoured by the nomu that she’s decided to become friends with.”

Anger.

“You are petty, and short-sighted. Do you understand just how extraordinary this relationship is?”

Another Coat butted in. “Sure, but what use is sentiment to a nomu? This was supposed to be a cold lethal predator, not a child that likes to draw on walls. I agree that the bond with its harvester is holding it back. It would be better off without her.”

Raptor hates it. He doesn’t want any of them talking about you. To think that they’d consider something as twisted as offering you to him as a helpless prisoner to execute, just like the one whose spine he had just snapped.

How dare they.

The lady was suddenly staring right at him with a look of shock before her aged lips curled into a smirk. Actually, everyone was staring at him now, and they all showed varying levels of discomfort. That’s when he noticed that he can see his hands in front of him again, along with his feet, wings, and the rest of his body. His fury made him lose his hold on the Camouflage quirk. They had all just seen his face of hatred.

And yet the lady continued to smile. “I don’t believe he agrees with you two.”

She then whispered something, lips forming what looked like the word ‘magnificent’ while her eyes bore into him. Even his rage was nothing more than a fascinating process to be examined.

Raptor wants to get out of here.

x---x---x---x---x

You’re alright. You made it out. You were bruised, but you made it out.

That High-End nearly broke your fucking arm when it came. It was always a pretty rough one when you jerked it off but for god’s sake, why did it always have to squeeze you like a stress ball? Thankfully, your painful shriek of “STOP!” was enough to penetrate the horny shield over its brain and it released you.

It wasn’t your first injury, but it’s been a while since you’ve gotten such a scare. It could’ve been worse – it could always be much worse.

The fact that you feel elated when you reach Hawks’s room shows how close the two of you have gotten in less than a week. Two prisoners who agree that this place can go fuck itself; one was pumping cocks on the daily, the other failed miserably at being a ruthless monster. They ought to make a movie out of this.

You enter the room to see him resting in the center while several feathers carve into different areas of the walls and ceiling. His understanding of shapes was becoming more complex at a rapid rate, if the current drawings were anything to go by. They looked to be unintentionally abstract faces, varying greatly in size and structure, but one thing they all had in common was oversized eyes. Every face was furiously scratched in, the sound of chiseling surrounding you and adding to the ominous aura given off by the etchings that lacked skill but teemed with raw emotion. 

The scattered claw marks from yesterday are still as visible as ever. Everyday, this place looks more disturbing even with the not-so-hostile creature that occupies it.

Something prompts his feathers to stop abruptly and return to him, followed by him quickly standing up and hissing. The badly-timed hostility makes you jump back. “Raptor? What is it?” You tried to stay calm as usual.

He drew closer, eyes narrowed and teeth bared at the purplish welts on the arm that held your gazillionth jar. Oh, of course. You waved with you uninjured one. “It’s alright. One of the High Ends was being a little heavy-handed. It stings, but it’ll get better.” 

Hot air hits you when he releases a snort. While he studies the bruise, you continue to examine the newest artful additions. “So...what do all of these mean?” You ask.

He follows your traveling gaze and mutters. “Watching. They’re always watching.”

He said it so smoothly that it gave you chills. “You’re tripping up less on your words. That’s, uh, good.” When a grunt is his only response, you keep talking. “Are these the doctors?” He nodded. “Did you...have to kill again?”

A beat. Then he nods again, more slowly this time. “It was easier.” 

You’re not sure what to say to that, deciding to instead rest a hand on his arm. For some reason, what he said didn’t scare you. It was you who asked him to act more like a nomu, anyway.

You both stayed like that for a few minutes, standing side-by-side in the middle of the room’s crude composition that illustrated his short life. Innocence, rage, and now a feeling of powerlessness. You can relate; your progress here was very similar except that the ‘innocence’ part can be replaced with ‘grief’, having lost contact with everything you were familiar with. 

“You know, maybe I can add my own additions to this sometime, if you don’t mind. Make this place our own little mural.” You giggle when his tail swings at the proposal. “There’s no way they haven’t noticed how odd of a duo we are by now. I wonder how those assholes feel about all of this.”

You’re grabbed and pulled into him so quickly that the jar slips out of your grip, rolling away as you’re pushed into a hard black chest. The tight embrace squeezes your swollen arm painfully. “Shit, that hurts!”

He whines apologetically and loosens his hold. Pain and lack of oxygen aside, it’s oddly comforting. You haven’t been hugged in ages, and here you were being held by this. A song of soft coos calm you, but there is a noticeable sad tone to them. You look up at him, chin resting on his pecs. “Raptor, I know it sucks here, and I don’t really know what to say to make things better, but I’ll keep trying to hang out with you for as long as I can, alright?” You reassure him while rubbing his chest. “Remember, you’re kind of the best thing that ever happened to this place. Not that my standards in this shithole are very high – they’re actually lower than a regular nomu’s sex drive – but it’s still an achievement you should be proud of.”

Your words did their job, if his lighter hums are anything to go by. His comforting heat was gone too soon when he gently pushed you back, following up with a press of lips against yours.

There’s no more clumsiness in his movements. He switched from light brushes that had you craving more to deep smooches that took your breath away. There wasn’t much else you could do except follow his lead. The teasing licks against your lips never fail to get you going, and he probably knows that by now. Unfortunately, you had to break apart for a breather, allowing him to cradle you as he waited.

“Who the hell have you been kissing while I’m not around to learn so fast?” You joked.

You didn’t expect him to look away and hesitate to answer before uttering, “I...remembered.”

If he was expecting that to upset you, it didn’t. You can’t stop his brain from working, and he no longer automatically gives in to any demands. You still don’t know what’s up with that. “Right,” you sighed. “Are you remembering anything else?”

“No...same things. Hawks...fire...death...I want to forget.” He pulls you in again, this time taking care not to add too much pressure to your bruises. His strangled attempts at speech have become smoother over the days, but hearing the winged hero beneath the layers of grotesque sounds that create his voice is going to take a long time to get used to. “Can...you...make me forget?”

A twinge of sadness and pity. Are his final moments the only parts that keep playing in his head, in a cruel loop? You direct all of your strength into your voice and speak. “Forget about it. Forget about Hawks and all of those foggy memories.”

He sits there and blinks with no clear sign that your words had any effect. 

Then he wilts and groans in defeat.

“No good, huh?” You shrug. You truly did wish you could help him. “There’s not much else I can do, sorry.” A pause. “Must feel like nightmares, I guess. I get plenty of those.” You rest in his hold while recalling some of the fears that manifest in your sleep. “Dreams about what they’ll do when they don’t need me anymore. I never had the guts to put myself out of my misery – don’t have many options to work with anyway. Maybe I can ask a nomu to chomp my head off.”

“No.” The word was growled out, felt all around you like a small quake. You quickly try to calm him by raising your uninjured arm to hold and caress his face. You know that he couldn’t exactly feel it anymore, but the memory of your touch is probably what still managed to soothe him. It was an intimate image, touching him so lovingly while in his arms.

“Don’t worry, I’ll stick around. We can make things easier for each other.” Without a second thought, you straighten up and begin pushing down your pants, Hawks already chirping in excitement and fumbling with your shirt, his talons ripping the cloth. You were naked in front of him once again, and the memories of yesterday already have your pussy lubricating itself in preparation. Samples...semen….you weren’t thinking about any of that. You just wanted him again.

“Let’s help each other forget.”

And just like that, you were devoured. His mouth was everywhere and you happily took it all. You were addicted to his touch as much as he was addicted to your flavor. The dark blue tongue moved gracefully across your face, the small grin and lidded eyes telling you that he quite enjoyed the sight of you covered in his saliva. You opened your mouth wide as an invitation that he gladly took, the strong muscle charging straight into your mouth and hitting the back of your throat. It makes you gag and has tears pricking at your eyes, yet you continue to throb between your legs.

He fucks your mouth so fast and roughly that you’re forced to only breathe through your nose. You’re clinging onto him as you gurgle around the ravaging muscle, your nails unable to pierce his tough hide no matter how hard you grip.

Something solid rubs right against your sex, grazing your clit and leaving you moaning into his mouth. His hips were bucking into the air with a very prominent tent that constricted his growing cock.

It’s the first time a nomu’s dick actually touches you there. 

And it makes your walls clench.

You get closer for more friction, trying to grind against the massive erection while he finally removes his tongue from your mouth. That’s when he notices just how hard you’re trying to get off on his bulge.

Heat is rushing to your face at his puzzled expression. “You-” You gasp, still catching your breath after having him squirm down your throat for so long. “You feel pretty good.”

He simply watches you continue to rub against him – you don’t even notice that his hips are no longer moving, you just press closer to him and grind harder in desperation. His wings flutter and the rest of his body shakes lightly, his breaths coming out in short huffs.

He was laughing.

The look of amusement is so unexpected that it has your hips stopping out of embarrassment. And here you thought nothing else could leave you flustered at this point. “You don’t have to laugh. Trust me, you’ve looked way more desperate than I have,” You tease him. 

He clicks his tongue, then with a yank and a loud rip, his shorts are in tatters and his cock springs free right onto your belly. Another short round of huffs are heard from him when you squeak in surprise. Just where did this attitude even come from?

Beads of precum ooze from his pointed head and drip onto your stomach. Maybe it’s your lust-tinted lenses, but his cock is looking much more attractive than usual. Its curved perfectly to hit all of the right spots, and those ridges probably feel amazing when moving inside you.

“Want more?”

The low-pitched voice right in your ear has you shaking, like it was a question from the Devil himself. Thirst aside, you don’t know what you should say. You trust that he won’t fuck you to shreds like the other High Ends would, but the biggest issue…

“I don’t know if I should risk that,” you murmur, a hand reaching to rub the textured flesh. “As tempting as it is right now.”

His confidence is replaced with disappointment. That is, until he immediately perks back up and grabs your hips.

“Wait what are yoooo-whoa!”  You’re being lifted off the floor, legs dangling uselessly as he holds you easily, your body hovering right over his twitching dick.

Panic begins to set in. “No! Nononono I said-”

“I won’t.” He says softly. As softly as he can with such a voice, at least. “Calm.”

Instead of penetrating like you feared, he lowers you until your flushed lips are resting on the length of his scaly shaft.  

And then, slowly, his hips push forward.

The bumps and creases slide against you in all of the right ways. “Oooh fuck.” You adjust yourself to ensure that he rubs your clit as well. The sensation has you shuddering in his hands as the pressure inside you builds quickly. Your slick makes his dick smoother after each thrust, and when Hawks sees that you’re comfortable and lost in the rhythm, he begins to speed up. 

Your legs are swinging madly at a complete loss on how to handle the electrifying friction, but the nomu grunts and takes hold of your thighs. They close around his cock, greatly increasing the pressure as he continued to fuck past your thighs. “Stay there.” The vibration from his deep raspy voice only arouses you more. His hips collide with yours after each buck.

As amazing as it feels, your hazy mind recalls that Hawks shouldn’t be able to properly revel in this outercourse. “I-I thought...you couldn’t feel this.” You say shakily.

Hawks is eyeing your bouncing form with great interest, his hips not missing a beat as he answered. “Can’t. Just watching.”

He presses down on you more, slowing down his pace with his eyes still locked on your face. His tongue quickly swipes across your forehead to taste the sweat that has mixed with his saliva. “You look good.”

Goddamn him.

You felt close, so close, but even as your limbs tingle from the pleasure, your orgasm remained out of reach. The most severe ache that had yet to be sated, to be given any attention, was inside you. You have never throbbed this much in your life, you didn’t even know that your muscles down there could even contract this tightly. The dragging of his cock against your drenched lips isn't enough. You don’t care about risk anymore. Not after feeling what he has to offer.

There’s no voice telling you how stupid you’re being right now. It already gave up on you.

Good.

“Haw–shit–Raptor, inside. I need you inside.” You beg between your moans. He stills completely, which has you whining and squirming even more.

“Inside?”

Hearing him say it sobers you up a bit, but not enough to kill your desire. “Just pull out before you cum, alright? Think you can do that?” You ask.

He nods eagerly, wings and tail moving with glee as he lifts you off of his dick that was already lubed up by your natural fluids. He angles himself until the head is pressing at your twitching entrance. 

You can’t tell if you’re trembling from excitement or fear. Probably both.

The fine tip already has you being stretched wide, burning and stinging in spite of your pussy’s preparation. It makes you wince and want to close your eyes – to create some distance between you and the pain – but your curiosity has you looking down to watch him enter you, inch by inch. You can once again see your stomach distend as it attempts to accommodate the large intrusion, much bigger than the slithery tongue that previously invaded it.

But it’s exactly what you craved, the unique texture feeling even more delicious when inside of you. Your toes curl and legs quiver from his girth; not as meaty as the other dicks that you’ve treated, just enough extra thickness to give you a stretch that you’ve never experienced, without causing serious harm.

He reaches the end of your cavern with a few more inches to spare, and the drawn out moan slipping past his lips surprises both of you. You try to relax around him while he fights the urge to move. Black shaky wings expand behind him.

“Feel…” He gasped and choked, one would think that he was trying to learn speech all over again. “Can feel...squeezing. So gooood.” The last word came out as a strong rasp against your face.

The new discovery has you smiling, one of your hands rubbing at a much larger one around your waist. “You can feel it? You feel how tight I am, Raptor? How badly I want you to stay inside me and never leave?” He may not be able to feel your heat or your dampness, but it looks like he can’t escape the pressure from a cunt’s death grip.

He twitches inside, making you jolt. Oh, how quickly the tables have turned.

You scratch under his chin. Numb as he is, he still tilts his head like a pet dying for affection. “Then I want you to fuck me. Stop thinking, and just move...” You bring your face close to his, pulling off a seductive look and tone even when impaled on him. “...Just like a good nomu.”

Perhaps Hawks had a submissive kink when he was alive. It would explain why that riled him up so much that he was already slamming into you with absolutely no warning. 

It hurts. It hurts so fucking good. Every thrust tears a helpless cry out of your body. The scales grind against every nerve around your hole, while the ones deeper inside nudge your velvety walls as they move in and out, in and out.

You couldn’t talk between your screams, not with how violently he was pounding you. Your arms and legs wrapped around him and hung on for dear life with your face buried in the crook of his neck. His own muscular arms wrap around you in a deceptively loving embrace, pumping into you with a rhythmic smack smack smack.  All you can do is reap what you sow and take it. 

This wasn’t just for you, this was for Hawks as well. You gave him something that he could feel again. What began as whiny gasps for air soon became rolling growls that vocalize a need for more. 

Your orgasm barely sticks out of the continuous blinding pleasure as he plows harder through your spasms, your contracting muscles wrestling with the merciless cock to hold it inside. 

His tone is dark. Vicious. “Tight. So tight!”

It makes your greedy body want even more. “Oh, good job, Raptor. Such a good boy.” You praise him, feeling the brief falter in his movements. He really does like that. “Go ahead and take it all, as much as you need-ah. Don’t worry about me. Fuck me until I can’t think.”

The violent sex stops and you’re being ripped away from that wondrous cock in the blink of an eye. Before you can even question what’s happening, your world begins to spin until you’re suddenly on the floor. You’re getting adjusted onto your hands and knees right before being pierced again with a force that shoves you forward. 

Your thoughts struggle to keep up with the lightning-fast sequence of events, hindered even more by the warmth of the body hovering right over you. Hawks too was on all fours, though he looked much more comfortable and natural, wings fully spread out in a proud and dominant display as he throbbed inside of you. 

His hips snap forward, already at a rapid pace that rocks you with each hard impact and soon has you howling again. The floor was filled with uneven cracks and scratches that scraped your knees, not that the discomfort was easy to notice while you were being drilled into. As you latched onto one of his arms for support, you noticed right in front of you, was your first game of tic tac toe.

Drool dripped down from the snarling jaws above you and onto the innocent group of lines and shapes.

The mounting beast humped you with every ounce of energy he had. Your aching pussy couldn’t take it. Too hard...too big... you’re cumming again around his pistoning cock, moans melting into defeated sobs. The huge pair of swinging balls occasionally smacked right into your oversensitive clit. You were losing the will to hold yourself up, gripping his supportive arm more tightly while your thighs quivered. Even if you had the strength to, you had no plans to ask the feral savage to stop.

He currently wasn’t anything like the gentle experiment you’ve befriended in just a few days. Right now, with his head thrashing around and flinging spittle everywhere as he barked, and wings beating hard against the floor, he was terrifying. Powerful, hungry, and single-minded.

So this is what it’s like to give in to a nomu.

It’s scary.

It’s thrilling.

Every fast agonizing stroke right against your cervix takes your breath away, your mouth eventually just hanging open in an attempt to capture whatever oxygen it could into your lungs. Hawks curls into himself so that he can crane his neck and look at you, saliva flowing freely down his chin. Each breath came out as a throaty growl wafting against your sweaty face. He takes one look at your parted lips, and stuffs you with his tongue.

If your thoughts were more coherent at the moment, you’d wonder how the hell the muscle was strong enough to be able to move into your throat as hard as the dick that continued to wreck your insides. His hips assisted in gagging you even more with each thrust. The threat of asphyxiation only brought you closer to your next orgasm. 

Your mind was empty, save for the immoral thoughts that have long since driven off their more honorable competition. 

Just use me.

Your entire body was on fire, getting pummeled from both ends.

Just use me however the fuck you want.

Hawks is suddenly bombarding your cunt with short and speedy ruts of his hips, and that does it. Your limbs give out and leave you to plop onto the floor as your pleasure blooms all over. But his long tongue follows you, still pushing into your whimpering mouth to deprive you of much-needed air. He simply lowers himself and proceeds to fuck you hard into the ground, pressing your skin into his many carvings.

His tongue leaves...your eyes rolling back….

Hawks releases a horrid cry that sounds like both a roar and a bird-like shriek.

Exhaustion…

Hawks is too lost in the surprising sensations, dull but still intense, to realize that he’s shooting his thick load into your womb

Warmth...full...sleep.

x---x---x---x---x

“Get up.”

The voice is muffled as you slowly come to. Whatever you’re resting on doesn’t feel like your bed.

“I know you’re awake. Hurry and get up.”

You’re surrounded by warmth, by something breathing. Pain shoots through your back and legs when you stir. When you open your eyes, you see the golden eyes of a High End.

The fear does well in masking your aches as you scramble out of the arms of what turned out to be Hawks, who was lounging on his side like a giant cat.

And standing at the door, was the damned doctor that you had the privilege of seeing every day.

His stare looked even more judgmental than it usually did. Full-on disgusted, actually. Realizing that you’re still naked, you grab one of Hawks’s wings that were splayed out on the floor to shield yourself.

He simply shakes his head. “I’ve already seen enough. And heard enough.”

Oh shit.

Oh shit.

“I-I…” you stammer, panic rising in your chest as you’re unable to come up with any sort of explanation. You even turn to Hawks, like he’d somehow provide you with the answer.

“I normally don’t care what deplorable methods you people use to collect your samples, but going by the filth between your legs...” That prompts you to look down, and the second you do, you already feel a dense fluid oozing out of you and running down your legs that were stained with white. “...you actually allowed Raptor to inseminate you.”

His words, along with your accelerating heartbeat, thunders in your ears. Hawks is watching his seed leak from your raw pussy. He remains still and quiet, uncertain of how to act in the presence of a doctor.

“To think that someone would deliberately let a nomu breed them. I know that the two of you have gotten close,” His eyes skimmed past the many images and markings in the room. “But just how depraved do you have to be to go this far with a nomu?”

If this was before the days you allowed Hawks to touch you, you would have felt embarrassed. You are scared. Not only did he cum inside you, you’ve also been caught right after the act.

But any sort of shame?

You had the nerve to huff, still hiding your body from him not out of shyness, but because the asshole didn’t deserve the view. “I guess we’re all sick fucks around here,” you retort.

The glare on his glasses add to the intimidation factor of his glower. He takes a step forward and gives a quick tilt of his head. “Get dressed. You’re coming with me.”

Both you and Hawks are taken back. “For what?”

He scowls even harder. “Still asking questions? You’re lucky that you’re valuable right now. You have most likely been impregnated. This is an unexpected opportunity to observe one of Raptor’s offspring. We’ll be watching over you until the birth.”

You don’t move, still soaking in every word. This most definitely was a mistake. Not only are you going to be taken away from Hawks to be cooped up in a room with constant surveillance, you’re going to have a...fuck.

You feel the wing in your grasp vibrate softly, Hawks sensing your distress and attempting to silently reassure you.

“I said get dressed,” the doctor ordered impatiently. “Or are you still basking in the afterglow?” He snickered at his own joke before walking forward, ready to take you by force.

That’s when the nomu in the room finally stood up to step right in front of you, standing tall in all of his naked glory and easily towering over the man.

You had to give the guy credit for not looking phased by the very dangerous creature blocking his path. Then again, maybe he was just so sure that Hawks wouldn’t harm him in any way.

“Out of the way, Raptor.” Strong and firm. It’s the tone that ensures a nomu’s obedience, but you know by now that Hawks’s mind has grown beyond that.

As expected, Hawks doesn’t budge, still looking down with eyes of liquid gold.

The doctor only looks more annoyed, not afraid. “I knew you were defective,” he sneered. “Always hesitating during tests. Such wasted potential, yet the others insist on keeping you around. To do what? Decorate rooms? The idiots should have altered your brain by now.”

What? 

Hawks still didn’t move. The lack of reaction was beginning to get to the man’s nerves, his hands balling into fists as he contemplated what action to take next. You stayed mostly hidden behind Hawks, anxiously looking past his wings.

When he accepted that the nomu wasn’t going to move, and forcing his way past him was too dangerous of an option, he smirked. “Fine, then. You’re only making yourself look worse. I’m certain I can convince them to move forward with that operation after they see how defiant you’re being right now.”

No! You feel so damn useless. The bastard wanted to change him into something more compliant. How much would that change Hawks himself? You don’t know if there’s anything you can do that won’t just end with you being thrown into the lion’s den. 

The doctor placed two fingers to his temple. Fuck, his quirk. 

“Backup needed in South Hall, room five o’ ni-”

He stopped. Pure shock took over his face, words replaced with the faintest choked sounds. You truly considered asking if he was feeling alright.

Until a thin line of red appeared at his throat, blood oozing out, the bleeding getting heavier by the second.

“What. The. Fuck?”  Your breaths were becoming too short as you watched him crumple, the liquid crimson quickly pooling around him. “What the fuck is going on?”

The confusion and fear was making you delirious. God, you were going to pass out again, this is too fucking much, this asshole was about to take you away because you have a monster growing inside you and then he was going to turn Hawks into a regular High End but now he’s dead but who the fuck killed him and what’s about to happen to you-

“Calm.”

A large hand on your shoulder grounds you, steadying your breathing and expanding your tunnel vision. Hawks is in front of you, releasing soft coos.

“Wha–how–wha…” Your shaky lips are unable to form words, but he seems to understand. Something materializes right in front of you. Small, black, and sharp. It’s a feather, floating between the both of you. “What?” You finally spit out.

“Camouflage,” that’s all he says, as if that explains everything. Since when was he able t-

Whatever. There’s too much shit happening right now.

Still shaking, you look to see the doctor still bleeding, some of the blood flowing into the engravings and painting them red.

“Y-you killed him?” You whisper.

He nods, staring apathetically at the body.

“But, I thought you didn’t…” You trailed off, too stunned by everything that has happened to finish.

He turned his attention back to you, red irises – as red as the blood that continued flow – staring into your frightened eyes. “It gets easier.”

Once again,  you’re not sure what to say to that.

He looks to the door. “More coming soon.”

Right, whoever the doctor was contacting must be wondering why his telepathy was suddenly cut off.

“I want to leave.”

“Leave? Like, you want to escape?” Another nod. “That’s...I don’t know if that’s possible. There are villains around here. Strong villains. Shit, they might release some of the nomu on us!” 

“You want to stay?”

Your mouth opens, then closes.

“I’m strong, and fast.” His wings unfurl and sharpen every feather, his tail curling around you so that you can see the knifelike plumes on it. “Can heal very fast and blend in. Can do a lot.”

The display and simple explanation reminds you that you haven’t seen any of his combative skills firsthand. This is what they made him for.

Well then…

“Right, then how about we give them a final test?” Just when you were finally calming down, adrenaline is already being pumped back into your veins. “Let’s show them how unstoppable their latest work is.”

His little peep of agreement nearly ruined the moment, but it reminds you why you’ve grown so fond of him.

He turns around and crouches, motioning you to climb onto his back and wrap your arms around his neck. It was awkward, mostly due to the wings that you were squishing under you, but when you voiced your worries he just gave you an “It’s fine.” He warned you to hang on extra tightly whenever he gets low to the ground. He’s a much faster runner on all fours.

Stepping over the corpse that has bled dry, he stopped at the door and braced himself. 

“Ready?”

Your arms and legs were secured around him. You breathed in through your nose then out through your mouth. 

Breath in. Breathe out.

A lot of death and destruction is probably about to come your way.

Breathe in. Breathe out.

It would be great if you never had to fill another jar ever again.

Breathe in. Breathe out.

Your clammy skin hasn’t felt sunlight in fucking forever. Are the heroes even still alive out there?

Breathe in. Breathe out.

You try not to think about what’s happening in your womb.

“I’m ready.”

The door is pushed open. 

x---x---x---x---x

Targets first spotted at 12:50

The old surveillance cameras flicker and lag. It makes noticing the running black figure all the more difficult. On most screens, you’ll see nothing more than a blur. There will be the occasional confrontation with villains, sometimes accompanied by researchers with incapacitation quirks. More often than not, the escapees easily outmaneuver them, crawling and leaping on every surface and zooming past their potential captors before they can even follow.

Some of the stronger villains and nomu slow the duo down only briefly before they collapse from an unseen force. The recovered bodies possessed deep cuts across major arteries or accurate punctures in their major organs.

Some footage shows the two sometimes climbing into vents, temporarily escaping the cameras.

The woman on the High End’s back was injured during the fatal showdown at the hospital’s exit, enraging it to the point where it swiftly killed everyone in its vicinity, including fleeing researchers that were only caught in the crossfire.

Targets escaped facility at 13:09

x---x---x---x---x

Subject: Raptor

SUBJECT HAS ESCAPED. NOMU IS HIGHLY DANGEROUS. TAKE EVERY PRECAUTION IN RETRIEVING IT.

Some things are too good to be true. It turned out that Raptor’s brain has, shall we say, faulty wiring. Several observations have noted him hesitating upon certain commands. This should not be a constant problem with any High End. I don’t understand why they did not immediately work on this issue. It’s possible that they feared irreversible changes to his unique mind.

I personally believe that many of these flaws are the result of a compassionate host. The hero Hawks was unmistakably a gifted combatant, probably the most gifted individual the facility has gotten their hands on, but his attitude did not translate well into the role of a nomu. On the bright side, I never thought I’d ever see nomu, let alone a High End, show such genuine fondness over a human. I believe it’s worth another try in the future.

But for now, we should stick to what works. There are more than enough lowly criminals to go around.

[woolydemon]

*slides over here and fucking trips n lands on my face.* hey any fun little facts about ur characters

oh, uh, haha ok I guess I'll talk abt. Wally (he/they pronouns for him)

(long-ish blurb under the cut. and more doodles)

This is Wallace, or Wally for short ! He's a whole piece of work of their own, both figuratively and literally as they are an artificial intelligence that gained sentience lol. He is a prototype of a line of robotic assistants, which never worked out bc Wally ended up killing their creators and is unable to be detained no matter how much ppl try to <3

(sorry this was the best way i could format this)

He used to just be rlly curious about the world he came into, but now he's filled with an unbridled anger and fury with everything they do know. They specifically have a distinct disdain for being perceived by others, to be interpreted based on just how they look or what they are. Which y'know, Is impossible to prevent happening ever so the fact he is unable to cope with this fact is. not great. It ends up with him lashing out against everything with extreme violence & aggression (he in fact spends his time prowling around in the desert & attacking anything that approaches him)

They were initially designed to be pleasing and comforting, with warm colors and a friendly face (not rlly shown in these sketches but he has bright orange hair). Their voice originally was a softer friendly voice too. But he wasn't rlly about that, so he actually distorts his voice along with downloading many different tts voices for him to use. He however really does love his body, he just hates the perception of it being feminine & also often compels ppl to objectify him (which makes him uncomfortable as he is sex repulsed).

But he refuses to change how he looks beyond the occasional use of robot parts like the robot claw arm pictured in some of these doodles (all these parts stolen from other robots btw) but that's only for attacking. Again, he genuinely likes how he looks. It's one of the few things that makes him happy

Of course, he could outlive humanity and everything else on an Earth that's already falling apart (btw forgot to mention this takes place in an apocalyptic future), festering with bitterness and lashing out until there's nothing he can lash out at against anymore. Or he could, I dunno, accidentally be forced to cooperate with fellow robots and learn how to process his emotions in healthier ways and be able to let go of his anger for things he can't control,,,,,,,,, haha imagine that (that's the main plot of the story he takes place in lol)

[icannotgetoverbirds]

on radical acceptance

okay so I am making a separate post for this because I am Feeling Things today

I was a fat kid. I am now a fat adult. I had a lot of internalized sizeism as a kid, and I still have some residual shit from the way I grew up.

I never saw fat characters on TV as characters who happened to be fat, they were always Fat�� - caricatures rather than characters. This was far beyond the norm - it would've been extraordinary to see a fat character, particularly a fat woman portrayed as just. a person.

I saw every fat person through a distorted lens, including myself. I never was able to see fat people being just people because I was too focused on the fact that they were fat. This again extended to myself.

One particularly painful day, I vowed to myself that I would never be a bully. I was sick and tired of the way I was treated. I knew it was based purely on superficial characteristics - being autistic probably didn't help.

This became especially important when I began to learn about activism. In particular, when I learned about fat activism, I realized that fat was a sort of demographic, too - and as such, deserved the same respectful dismantling of internalized -isms that I'd learned everybody had.

And as I dismantled it, I learned a few vital things:

Being fat is almost always out of one's control.

Even if it isn't, being fat does not deserve hatred.

Even if sizeist people are truly concerned for health, sizeism is not a solution - nor was being fat inherently problematic.

Being fat is not a moral issue - if it is any issue, it is a health issue.

Sizesit people don't actually care about fat people - they just hate having to look at us because their view of us is just as distorted as mine was.

To them, we are caricatures, not people. We are Fat™, not fat.

Many sizeist beliefs are rooted in ableism and aggressively capitalistic ideas.

Fat people are people first, before anything else.

If a thin person deserves something, so does a fat person.

And as I learned these things, I became able to see more clearly the humanity in other fat people, including those that were larger than me. I came to realize that we have not banded together as a community because we've fallen victim to a sort of infighting: we police ourselves and each other, and the system of sizeism continues in its cycle. We pat ourselves on the back for not being Fat™ in much the same way that young girls will pat themselves on the back for not being shallow caricatures of femininity - we have made each other our enemies instead of turning against the system that pitted us against each other in the first place.

I came to realize that we are all human beings, and that to love another human being for exactly who they are is a beautiful thing.

And gradually, the self-hatred that I'd denied and buried before exhuming it, began to decompose.

Now, years later, I realize the gravity of what I've done for myself. As a child, I couldn't imagine looking at this body and smiling. Now, I can look at this body and, despite the dysphoria that comes with being trans, say that this is a person I could love. Whether I perceive my reflection as a man or a woman, I can tell it "I could love you." Hell, I can tell it that it'd be an attractive woman if it was a woman and that it sure is a lovable man.

And to look at my reflection and say, "I could love this"?

It's so close to "I do love this". It's so far beyond where I ever believed I could go in my journey to be kind.

To put it simply, I think that radical acceptance leads to self acceptance, actually, and we all deserve that.

[starshipsofstarlord]

The Sheriff and the Murderer

Part Three

Previous Parts | Part One | Part Two

Series Masterlist

Quick link to my masterlist, if you’re interested in reading more of my crap 😬

Summary | one of the many things that you had never had the chance of doing was disposing of a body; luckily for you, you know just the right person who can tend to your aid.

Warnings | mentions of death, disposing of a body, mentions and aftermath of murder, mentions of rape, mentions of sex, swearing, mention of suicide

The smell of the carcass had your nose turning up, and the sight wasn’t much better. There was blood staining your lovely dress, that Lee had taken off hours prior. Now it was ruined, with the red digress of your husband; he always had to taint everything, and it still appeared to apply despite him being deceased.

Your eyes wallowed with water, as you thought of the mistakes you had made. There were so many, and marrying Simon had been of the greatest, considering that his treatment of you had been beyond disgraceful. And now, the red of his departed insides was sticking beneath his nails, causing you to gag.

This part, the slashing and ripping apart of his limbs, using your trusty shovel, had been worse than actually committing the initial crime. Killing him had been bliss, but this, reminded you of the possible consequences that you would be forced to partake in.

“Oh no.” You heaved, feeling nauseous from the pungent aroma, grasping at the top of your chest in sickness. You dropped his hand, that felt ironically lighter now that he was dead, letting it fall with the other parts of his distorted, and broken, body.

The worst part of all was, now that you had control of where his palms were permitted to go, and the power had you feeling complete. It had you basking in your own glory, but now, you were lost, grieving the path that you had lost regarding the man that you truly were infatuated with.

Walking backwards, and closing the shed door, you abandoned the sections of Simon, hurrying back into your empty home, and going towards your lined phone. Without caring about the prints of blood that you were padding onto the numerical keys, you dialled a woman that you knew to be in the business of cold body abandon.

For a minute, the line rang, leaving you antsy and picking at your stained nails, chipping away at the surrounding skin. All you could smell was the reminder of blood, that smothered you in a hermit of remembrance.

A remembrance of the times that he would splatter your body with his self, claiming that you were his wife, and even bragging about it to the fellas that he worked closely with. But you were nothing more than a shadow in his eyes, a prize that followed him around the house, flaunting her terrified doe eyes at his silhouette.

His greatest flaw was, aside from his poisonous and lingering touch, that smothered you in the cruelest of ways, was that he thought he was aware of everything that went on around him. It was as though he thought he were the sheriff...

But behind his turned back, your shadow would dance with the image of Lee Bodecker, in a private and disclosed matter. He was the true sheriff of the town, the wine who could order you to do anything, and you would wilfully comply.

Lee had, and never would hurt you. That was the definite difference between the polar pair. He was a lovely gentleman, and Simon, well, he was more like a rat swimming out of the sewer.

All these thoughts and actions of adultery were fair play, you slept with Lee behind the now scathed and chopped up back of your husband, whilst he bedded as many women that were actually willing to slumber with.

You were not dumb to his pattern, each night when he went out, he was pursuing a dame, but that never bothered you, because while he was out, the sheriff would make a stop, and check you over, in more ways than one.

Finally, you running with your thoughts was disrupted, for the ringing ceased. A upbeat and facade of a ‘hello’ rang though your ears, making you breathe a much deserved intake of relief.

“Hey Sandy.” You replied, holding the phone aggressively against your ear. Anything she had to say, you were willing to listen to, after all, she was a master in the ways of murder, as you knew and were trusted peculiarly with that detail of secrecy. “I need your help.”

The sound of Simon’s body parts beating around the trunk as sandy surpassed over a bump in the road reverberated through the entire vehicle. It soothed the initial silence that was exhibited in it, and nervously, you licked your thin lips, hoping that you would reach the ‘middle of nowhere’ soon.

It wasn’t that you and Sandy didn’t get along, in fact, you got along great, which was one of the reasons that she insisted to husband Carl that they leave you alive. But it was the fact that there was an unspoken gesture that waded through the air, like a muting toxin.

“Does Lee know?” She asked, finally breaking the silence like ice. It was a relief to hear voice, deep down, you were insecure that she was silently judging you for the entire ride, or at least, how far you had gone so far.

“No, and I intend for it to have a cap kept on it.” You slunk your shoulders, whilst thinking of Sandy’s sibling. He was far too good for you, he was the sheriff, and now, you deemed yourself as nothing more than a murderer.

The fact that you were a survivor of all sorts of horrid extremes wouldn’t matter to the boys in blue, they would not see you past your crime, and you feared that sheriff Bodecker would not either.

“Son of a bitch had it coming to him anyways.” Stated Sandy, being heartless to her admission. “The sight of you and that prick drove my brother insane. We all knew what he was doing to you, yet, they wouldn’t charge him, all because you were simply married to him.”

“What would you have done if Carl had dared lay his hands on you in an in-consensual manner?” You asked, plucking away at the trim of your clean skirt. Before you had left to go on this joyous trip with Sandy, you had changed, all in favour of the neighbours, and anyone else you happened to pass.

“I’d have done the same darling.” She comforted you, looking away from the road for a moment, to send you a quick and sincere smile. Things within the car were falling into their previous rhythm, it being apparent that the two of you were good and well adversed friends. “I wanted to kill Simon too, you know? But with the threats I have made in the past, it would have been far too suspicious.”

“Yeah.” You agreed, suddenly feeling guilty that if it were found to be known that Simon was butchered, Sandy would be interrogated, most likely from her own brother. “How is Carl?” You changed the subject, shifting under the grip of the seat belt.

“Shouldn’t I be asking you how my lovesick brother is?” She replied, laughing lightly at your warm face. “He’s still head over heels for you girl, and yet, the other man won your heart.”

“I wouldn’t say won it, I’d say he manipulated it.” You retorted, crossing your arms over your chest to pave down the swell of tension inside. “I’d always told myself, and you, that I’d choose Lee Lee, but high school was a long time ago, and I can’t go back to sneaking kisses with him under the bleachers when your back was turned.”

“Trust me, I knew all along.” She smiled, thinking back to the simpler times. “And though, I know when he was training to be a deputy, he’d told you he had no time for a relationship, and he didn’t exactly expect you to wait for him. But you may as well have, considering the two of you continued to fornicate like wild rabbits.”

“Please stop.” You groaned at her words, covering your face with your clear and evidence free hands. “And we did not fornicate like-“

“My bedroom was right beside yours when we got that apartment, and before then, well it was against Lee’s. Trust me, when I say that I know off by heart how you sound in bed sweetie. And god, did I grimace as I heard you mewling my brother’s name.”

Breathily you laughed, thinking back to the times that were spoke of. “Sandy.” You spoke her name, earning a radical hum in reply. “I love Lee.”

“Trust me darling, I am well aware of that. The two of you are like Romeo and Juliet, except you’ve killed someone else rather than taken your own life. And then, there’s never been anything holding the two of you apart-“

“Okay, you’re trying to make a point here Sand. Nothing like Romeo and Juliet, I got it.” You nodded your head, before leaning it back into the plumpness of the head rest. “And then there’s you and Carl, Bonnie and Clyde.”

“Sweetie, you’re a killer too now, so I wouldn’t make comparisons. You’re just lucky that the first suspect for Simon’s disappearance will be a man, and then we’ll see where I am on that list. And you know me, I will always protect you, it’s what we do.”

“It is what we do.” You repeated, watching the road ahead, and tapping your feet in tune with the floundering of Simon’s own rolling feet.

Tags;

@charmed-asylum @brynthebulldozer @tcc-gizmachine @stucky-my-ship @acciosiriusblack

[joheun-saram]

right here (jhs)

Summary- “That’s the thing about dating your best friend, when you break up you not only lose your partner, you lose the person who would console you too.”

word count- 4.1k

pairing- college!hoseok x reader

rating- pg15

genre- angst, childhood lovers, college au

warnings- drinking, marijuana use mention, mentions of sex but no explicit descriptions

a.n- i’ve been obsessed with keshi’s song right here and so this fic was born. i love hobi and i hurt writing this. s/o to @papillonsgf for reading it and easing my worries 🥺

Feedback much appreciated! 💕 An ask goes a long way... to my heart.

gif is not mine! :)

-

March 8th, 2:04 am

Y/N: I know it's random, how you've been?

March 11th, 11:26 pm

Y/N: Do you remember 'bout this band you said you listened to?

March 16th, 1:17 am

Y/N: I miss you, Hobi :(

March 16th, 3:43 am

Y/N: Hope life is treating you better...

Hoseok watched across the room as you sat in Taehyung’s lap. Your hand was on his chest as you laughed at a joke while his hand laid on your bare thigh, caressing right where your skirt ended. Hoseok’s drink tasted bitter as he scrolled through the messages you had sent him last month. 

He didn’t know why he was so held up on you still. It had been over three months since you broke up but every time you messaged him it was like his heart somersaulted in his chest. He had taken Yoongi’s advice to ignore your messages, in fact, Yoongi had suggested blocking you altogether so Hoseok could have some peace and move on but every time he tried to block you something stopped him. He could never bring himself to do it. It was like every atom in his body revolted against it.

You had dated for two years and even before that, you had been best friends for six years. Now you were a shadow in his life, always there in the background but he couldn’t feel you anymore. Ever present, but he could never catch you. He missed you. He always missed you but it seemed that you were happier now with your new guy. As he watched you cuddling cosily with Taehyung, he was sure that you weren’t even aware that he was at this party.

“I love you, Y/N. Please. I’m only saying this because I love you.” Hoseok maintained his tone despite how angry he felt at your actions. You had just casually told him you were flunking another class as you dressed up to go to another party. He couldn’t believe your cavalier attitude. You had been doing that a lot lately - going out with your new friends and getting wasted beyond your limit. This was how it always went. You’d go out and then come home late, stumbling into bed giggling, your breath reeking of liquor as you cuddled into him. He’d let it pass for months but he could see you disappear. He had tried to convince you to turn it down a notch time and time again but it always ended in the same ugly fight.

“You don’t control the people you love!” You snapped at him from where you stood in your shared bedroom, jacket falling off of one shoulder.

“I’m not trying to control you… Baby, please! I just want you to do better.” He went over to you, fixing your jacket as he cupped your face. He wanted you to understand how much it hurt him to see you this way. You shrugged him off, moving backward.

“Oh just because my grades suck, I’m not doing good?” Malice painted your tone as you raised your voice.

“You know that’s not what I mean, but this is not you. Showing up drunk to class? Staying all night at frat parties? That’s not you!” He matched your volume. He needed you to see that he was not the enemy. He wanted to shake some sense into you.

“Well, maybe you don’t know me, Hoseok.” Your eyes narrowed at him and he felt his heart sink. How could you say that to him? The ice in your tone running through his veins.

“I’ve known you since we were twelve!” He ran his hands over his face in frustration.

“That doesn’t give you the right to tell me how to live!” You poked him in the chest as your anger flared further.

“Please baby. Just talk to me. What’s wrong?” He softened his tone as he clasped your hand poking him in both of his. He knew you. Despite your words, he knew you. There was no way you were suddenly a party animal. There had to be something wrong.

“I just want to enjoy university, is that too much to ask?” You pulled your hand away from his harshly. He didn’t know what he was doing wrong but your anger fed his.

“And blacking out each night is enjoying it?”

“I can’t do this. I can’t have the same fight every night!” 

“Then stop. Stop fucking throwing your life away!” He couldn’t help how his voice broke at the end of the sentence. He could never control his emotions, especially when it came to you, and anger fuelled the tears that threatened to escape his eyes.

“Fuck you Hoseok. Fuck you! I’m done!” You pushed past him as you made your way towards the front door.

“What do you mean you’re done? Where are you going?” He grabbed your wrist as you neared the door, tears freely flowing at seeing your face distorted in anger. “Stop. Talk to me.”

“I don’t want to talk to you. I never want to see you again.” Your voice was cold, almost formal. No hint of emotion whereas Hoseok was a bawling mess. He always hated how in control of your emotions you were compared to him.

“Y/N… You don’t mean that. I love you.” He pulled you into a hug and whispered into your hair, holding on for dear life. His heart was racing. He couldn’t lose you. He didn’t know who he was without you. How could you look him in the eye and tell him you never wanted to see him again? Did eight years mean nothing to you?

“I love you too but I can’t do this anymore. You’re suffocating me.” You pushed him off and he could see the tears in your eyes, betraying your carefully put together facade.

“Y/N… please don’t do this.” He pleaded, holding your hand before you harshly shrug him off again.

“Bye Hoseok. I hope you find someone you don’t have to lecture.” You opened the door as you gave him one last withering look before heading out.

“Wait! You can’t just end us like this!”

“I can and I have. I’ll move out tomorrow.” And with that you were gone, disappearing into the night, while Hoseok crumpled to the ground, sobbing, unsure how your relationship had gotten to this point.

Hoseok walked into the kitchen. He needed something stronger than beer. He spotted a bottle of tequila on the counter, thanking his stars that the frat hosting this party was one that provided alcohol. As he poured himself a generous shot, Namjoon appeared slinging his arm around his shoulders, clearly tipsy.

“Hobi! Are you doing shots without me?” He gasped mockingly as he poured himself one too. Namjoon and Hoseok didn’t used to be particularly close but after his breakup with you, both men had bonded over their broken hearts. Namjoon’s girlfriend had cheated on him a few months before and it became a tradition for the two of them to drink in his apartment together. In fact, the only reason Hoseok was here today was that Yoongi had insisted that the two of them take their drinking outside of his and Namjoon’s shared apartment and try to find someone else to get over their heartbreak. He was sure it was only because Yoongi was annoyed by how loud they both got and he needed some peace. He had been roommates with Yoongi in first-year and he felt bad to impose on his friend almost every weekend so he agreed to let Namjoon drag him to this party.  Little did he know that you would be here tonight too.

“Never Joon! I wouldn’t betray the heartbreak boys!” Hoseok tried to muster as much excitement as he could, his smile half-hearted and not reaching his eyes. Fortunately, Namjoon didn’t notice as the two took three shots back to back. The sting in Hoseok’s throat felt welcomed, like antiseptic on a bad wound. 

“So you know how the best way to get over someone is getting under someone else?” Namjoon questioned, his eyes glazed over, as he looked over Hoseok’s shoulder. Hoseok responded in a hum, barely paying attention as his thoughts clouded over and replayed the way Taehyung’s hands caressed your body. He wished he never saw you tonight. Going from seeing you every day to not seeing you for three months had been terrible, but not as terrible as seeing you in his arms. Before he could delve further into his pain, he felt a tap on his shoulder.

He turned to see a pair of women, one already going into Namjoon’s arms as she pressed her lips to his, and the other introducing herself to him. He barely heard her name and after still not getting it for a second time, he decided to not bother. 

He didn’t want to make new friends, didn’t want to get under someone else as Namjoon had so eloquently put it. He just wanted you. She was persistent though, flirting aggressively, taking his disinterest as a cue to work harder. As the shots caught up to him, he just let her. Let her push him against the wall of the kitchen, let her kiss his lips, his neck. Let her run her hands under his shirt. He kissed her back after that but as he closed his eyes, he saw your face. He kissed her harder hoping the image went away but it grew stronger, the memories of you whimpering under him, memories of you laughing as you came. God, you always giggled as you came and he was so weak. The montage of your once happy relationship haunted him and he felt a strong pang of guilt. This girl deserved better than to be imagined as someone else. He needed to get out of here.

Mumbling an apology, he pushed her off himself and grabbed a beer before going to the backyard. It was quieter there, the majority of the partygoers too stoned to be chaotic, the music inside pouring out in a blur of bass and treble. He found a spot on the grass next to a tree as he sat down to compose himself. That girl, whatever her name was, was the first person he had kissed after you, and suddenly he felt an onslaught of emotions. A lump formed in his throat as he remembered your first kiss, after a similar party, when he promised himself that you would be the last person he kissed.

“Shhhhh! We’re gonna wake up Yoongi!” Hoseok giggled as he stumbled into his dorm room and you followed closely behind tripping on the shoes strewn by the door and falling onto him. He wished he was as suave as the guys on tv and caught you but instead he stumbled with you crashing on the floor in a puddle of hushed laughter, your head on his thigh.

“Let’s go to your room before grandpa yells at us.” You snickered as you got on your feet, pulling Hoseok up with you. The two of you walked slowly to his room, changing into sweats and tshirts, before collapsing on the twin bed, his arm under your head. This was a normal occurrence for the two of you. Every time you both went out, you slept over at one of your dorm rooms. In highschool, you would sneak into each other’s bedrooms but the freedom of university made it easier. Lying next to you, Hoseok felt comfortable. Just your presence put him at ease and soon your conversation was dying as his eyes got heavier.

“Hobi?” you whispered next to him making him turn around to face you. You always did this when you were drunk - bargained for cuddles - and as sleepy as he was, Hoseok didn’t feel like protesting as usual, so he put his arm around your waist and pulled you close, his one leg hitched around your hip.

“Goodnight.” He whispered patting the back of your head as he drifted off. What he didn’t expect was for your lips to touch his. It was a soft, lingering peck and it was like he was electrocuted, his eyes flying open. For a moment he thought it was some weirdly vivid dream until he heard you apologize. He had never thought of kissing you before, you were his best friend and he always thought of you as platonic. His platonic soulmate. But as soon as you had kissed him it was like a dam broke inside him, his heart beating fast, his lips tingling, and all he wanted was to do it again.

It was like he was on autopilot, his hand on the back of your neck as his lips silenced your apologies. This kiss wasn’t soft. It was eager, hungry, and Hoseok felt alive. It was like a switch went on in him, the feelings he had apparently repressed for years rushing to the surface at the same time settling him into a haze of endorphins. He couldn’t help grinning against you as your mouth parted for his tongue and he could finally taste you - the cheap wine coolers you drank, the one cigarette you bummed outside the party, and a sweetness that he could only describe as you. He needed you closer, inexplicably closer, as his grip around your waist got tighter, his leg pulling you in further till his knee was almost on the mattress, trying his hardest not to grind against you. 

You moaned against his mouth and he knew he would never forget that sound. How did he go so long without realizing how much he needed you? You were always the smarter one between the two of you - of course you knew before him that he would fall for you. 

He spent the night making out with you and he knew this was it. This was what they wrote songs about, started wars about. This was love. He felt it bloom within his chest, till the branches set each nerve ending alive. He knew everything about you and you knew everything about him and he never wanted to let anyone else in the way he let you in. He didn’t know if you loved him too yet, but he was ready to convince you that he’d never want to kiss someone like he was kissing you right now.

“This seat taken?”

Hoseok felt his heart clench at hearing your voice. He didn’t want to see you in this state. He was far too vulnerable and drunk right now to control himself when it came to you. He didn’t know how he’d react. Without waiting for his response you made yourself comfortable next to him on the grass, your back against the tree as your shoulder lightly grazed his. He felt like his shoulder was on fire, and he moved slightly away from you.

“How’ve you been Hobi?” Your voice was light, airy, as if you had never stomped on his heart. As if you had never left him sobbing on your porch just a few months ago without so much as a glance in his direction. He wanted to scream at you, tell you how you broke him, ruined him for everyone else, but before he could get a word out, you reached your hand and placed it on his. The innocent touch was too intimate, and he felt a tear roll down his cheek. How did the two of you get here, where your hand on his made him want to hug you and sob on your shoulder. That’s the thing about dating your best friend, when you break up you not only lose your partner, you lose the person who would console you too. All he could do in response to your question was just shrug. He felt pathetic. Why were you torturing him?

“I’m sorry for pushing you away,” you whispered as you squeezed his hand and he finally had the courage to look at you. You looked beautiful - the moonlight reflecting off your skin made you glow. His eyes traced your features from the curve of your brows, to how your eyes gazed at him softened, to the slope of your nose, to finally your lips, parted and shiny from your lip gloss. Before he could stop himself, he was leaning forward, crashing his lips on yours, kissing you quick and short, just enough to get rid of the taste of the girl before, just so he could hold on to you being the last person he kissed for a little bit longer. 

It’s when he saw the look of shock on your face that he realized what he had done. Muttering a quick apology, he stood up, ignoring your calls of his name as he walked through the house. He had to leave. He was an idiot. He was an idiot who was never going to get over you. Was this his life now? Watching you from afar, unable to control himself in your presence.

He decided to walk the thirty minutes to your - well now, just his - apartment. He was slower than usual, hoping that the fresh air would clear his mind, but everywhere he looked he was reminded of you. He passed by the ice cream shop where you had your first date and all he could think about was the way you coyly licked the melted ice cream off his fingers and kissed him telling him mint chocolate only tasted good off his tongue. He passed the twenty-four hour tattoo shop where he held your hand as you got your first tattoo at 3 am because you were bored and always wanted one, a little star on your hip. He passed the park where he had found you sulking after your first fight and he picked a wildflower for you, one that he hopes you still have pressed in your favourite book. He could never escape you. When he arrived at his door, he saw you standing there and thought he had finally lost all semblance of reality. That is, until you spoke.

“Baby, are you okay?” The pet name made his heart ache as he looked at you in alarm, realizing that you were actually there. He couldn’t do this. He stumbled back, almost tripping off the porch.

“Y/N… please. I can’t do this.” He pleaded, but he was helpless as you held his hand and guided him into the house, easily navigating him to his bed. You took off his shoes as he laid there, not having enough strength or courage to ask you to leave. He missed the way you would take care of him and he let you even if it's the last time. You didn’t say much as you tucked him under the covers, slowly caressing his hair and arms as he liked so he could fall asleep. This was cruel and he told you as much as silent tears escaped him, your quiet apologies echoing in his head as he fell asleep.

He woke up with a start, blinking at the sunlight that fills his room, groaning as his head ached from the hangover. He thought about the vivid dream he had of you putting him to bed and he couldn’t help but grimace at how pathetic he had become.

Startled was an understatement as he noticed you sitting in the desk chair next to his bed. Your were legs propped on the corner of the bed as you snoozed uncomfortably, your head bent at an odd angle. He noticed the bin next to his bed, right where his head would have been, and the bottle of water with painkillers on the nightstand. It reminded him of the times he had done the same for you and his head replayed the memory of when you walked out on him. Why were you back? Did you really miss him too?

He saw you stir and before he could lie back and pretend to be asleep, you were up, your eyes staring into his. You both sat there in silence just looking at each other. It had been so long that he had forgotten how your eyes could drown him, pull him in inexplicably deep.

You reached for him and before his brain could process it, he was reaching back, muscle memory leaving your fingers intertwined. That was when your facade broke for the first time in months and Hoseok could see a blackened tear that slowly trickled down your face. His eyes followed its path down your cheek as it lingered on your jaw before dripping on to your chest, darkening a spot on the red dress you wore. A few more followed its journey, before you were sobbing, loud cries that seemed to wreck your soul, and Hoseok was weak, pulling you into his chest and letting you use him as a makeshift kleenex. He didn’t know how long you both sat there, you crying on his chest, him holding you tightly, wishing he could stop your pain despite whatever you may have inflicted on him.

By the time you calmed down, he still couldn’t let you go, walking with your hand in his to your once shared kitchen, setting the kettle on. He still stocked your favourite blueberry tea even though he hated the taste. You spoke first after what seemed like hours.

“I dropped out.”

This was not what he had expected. Despite your numerous fights about schoolwork, he still liked to believe he knew you. It was your dream to study art, travel the world to visit galleries, with visions of curating your favourite exhibits. He still remembered all the times you would drag him to the local gallery, waxing poetic about inspirations behind modern art pieces. He never cared much about visual art but your passion had him holding onto every word. He could still recite everything about the history of the impressionist movement and its influences on your favourite artists. He knew that even if you were failing, you wouldn’t just give up on your passions.

“Our family business went bankrupt and so I can’t afford it. It was either this or our house.” Your voice was calm now, even monotonous, as if you had just expelled all the emotions earlier. He let you talk. Let you tell him about how your father had insisted they sell your family home and move to a studio so he could still supplement your tuition. But you could never do that to your family, have them sacrifice their home for something as silly as your childish dreams. Life had brought you to your knees, and you mourned your loss through parties and friends who encouraged your vices. 

Hoseok had a hard time processing - he thought he knew everything about you, but you were right that night, maybe he didn’t know you as well as he hoped. He racked his brain for any sign of the misery you spoke of, other than the late nights and he came up empty. To think, he’d been wasting time in the dance studio, with his hobbies, when he could have been helping you. 

He felt torn, he felt sad, he felt guilty, but all he could say was “Why didn’t you tell me?” Why had you hidden this from him when he could have lightened your load. He could’ve helped, taken out a loan from his parents, worked a part-time job to help you cover your bills. He was in love with you, didn’t you know that he would’ve done anything to help you? Would still do anything to help you.

“For once, Hoseok, I didn’t want to depend on you. I wanted to do it by myself, for myself.” Your voice was small, almost timid, but your eyes held your convictions. They softened as he squeezed your hand, and you apologized once more, almost pleading him to understand why you had to spend the last months alone, why you couldn’t be honest, but you didn’t need to say much he already understood. He knew you. 

He stood from where he was sitting on his stool and closed the distance between you, pulling you into his arms haphazardly, one around your head and other around your shoulders. He squeezed you tight as if he could meld your bodies together, take away the hardships you faced through osmosis. He didn’t know what you expected of him, but all he could do was hold you close, and when you looked up at him, cupping his cheek, he kissed you. He took his time, slowly reacquainting himself to the lips he craved. He didn’t know if the tears he was tasting were yours or his but all he knew was that you were here. 

And as you whispered an “I love you” on his lips, he knew that no matter how broken you had left him, for you he’d always be right here.

-

I hope you liked this angsty piece, for more fics of mine check out my masterlist

[astroforfun]

To ALL those who are asking about Lilith in the 1st:

✨LILITH IN THE 1ST✨

“People with Lilith in Aries/1H generally receive a lot of physical attention (even if they feel prone to reject or question this before owning it). This attention can be negative or positive, but regardless it can be a nuisance to the native because it’s hard to feel seen beyond their physical appearance. They might also have struggled with crippling insecurities that led to a distorted view of self (at extremes, this might’ve resulted in body dysmorphic disorder, eating disorders, self harm, etc.). A lot of people actually perceive people with these placements as confident, even if the Lilith person feels otherwise.

This is the placement that can attract a lot of people with raw sexual intentions. Ideally, they attract respectful, assertive, and slightly aggressive partners (which they may generally enjoy), but a more common reality for Lilith in Aries/1H is attracting people who are intimidated by them. A lot of times, they deal with admirers who don’t know what to say around them, leaving them too scared to approach OR they completely lack couth/ any approach that has manners. In fact, I’ve often seen people put on a front for this Lilith placement to hopefully attract them, but it usually fails. This is the person who either hears through the grapevine or behind a screen that somebody’s interested, or has someone come and make blatant sexual advances without a proper introduction. If Lilith doesn’t have the discipline and discernment, these folks can get caught up with some really dangerous people. In general, these placements deal with some insanely mean, immoral, or even dangerous people (or at their worst, are exactly this way).

Unfortunately, all of these things can actually result in a strong blind spot for some. At one point or another, Lilith’s insecurities may have caused them to see others being attracted to their bodies as deeper interest, making them more prone to heartbreak or being taken advantage of. Without awareness, it can be harder to trust that you have reasons to be confident or trust others at all who want to have sex/date you. Additionally, this is the native who at one point might have gotten hurt by a manipulative person who pretended to care, but ultimately just wanted to use them for sexual reasons. That being said, the Aries/1H Lilith can use their awareness of how people respond to them as a means of screening out people who don’t want true intimacy — something that many of these placements need in their relationships and sexual experiences. It might trigger you if someone wants to have sex immediately; you can be hesitant because you’re unsure of what you’re wanted for. I’d also imagine that this can manifest in the opposite way and make the native a bit hyper-sexual, but I’m just giving room for this theory hypothetically. If so, there’s a strong possibility it might be solely to experience the intimacy or validation of it.

The glory in the Aries/1H Lilith is that they have the potential to genuinely INSPIRE others. Your mere presence can attract to you the people, things and experiences you want to have. These people have the potential to have incredible, intimate sex. While some people may see you as intimidating, this serves you because it’ll be that much easier to weed out the people who can’t handle you. Consider this your inner bullshit detector. Whether they choose to be dominant or submissive, they’re able to use this raw energy to manifest. Also with discernment and control, these people can channel this creative energy in ways that fuel your ability to lead others and use your power. Lilith in Aries/1H people might use their appearance as a symbol of protest, maybe in the form of going out of their way to express themselves unapologetically. The way that you use your body can be something that others admire and respect, so you may find that people respond really well to you owning your body and/or your sexual nature. They might really love the way you dress (if you are intentional about your style) or even respond well to any body art you might have. For many people, the Aries/1H Lilith native that looks like them can be a role model for simply doing the things they want to do. Furthermore, a healthy competitiveness may attract a very powerful, kind and protective partner. You might be able to pull out the primal energy out of others that can be addictive, but most importantly, empowering. You’re the kind of person that makes people feel better about themselves just by being your best. The epitome of a natural leader in some way. You’re the role model; the person who gives others hope that maybe, they can be just as great as you one day.”

-from Kyla/medium.com

[remmushound]

Bay/rise 16! @errorfreak88 @brightlotusmoon

Cassandra was anxious. She had everything— her master had comeback at her side and was freed from the control of that monstrous spider demon. What was left of the Foot Clan was strong! She had the entire, empty city at her whim! But what good was the city if there were no people in it? Nobody to rule or protect or attack or make her life interesting. The turtles and their friends had disappeared into that rift and brought the city’s orb with them. Taken her masters Lou and Brute away from her, and took the rest of her foot clan away away too. Left her alone nothing but a few rouge mutants running amok, and the ruby ring on her finger that gave her control over The Shredder, What a waste…

She twisted the ruby ring on her finger. Like a puppet, Shredder twisted Big Mama harder into the ground under the immense weight of his armor. The Jorogumo screamed her anguish as the sounds of her body popping filled the air.

“I already told you, I don’t know where they went!” Big Mama wailed to the unmerciful duo.

“Why don’t I believe you?” Cass asked, climbing down from her throne made of mystic vines and leaning close to Big Mama’s face. “Where are my masters?”

“I don’t know!”

Another twist of the ring. Shredder grabbed one of Big Mama’s legs and started to twist it slowly backward.

“AH— I can’t tell you where they are! But I know who can and I’ll tell you where to find him if you just STOP!”

Shredder stopped twisting seconds before the limb would have come off. He let the leg fall back down, and it curled under the safety of Big Mama’s rotund belly.

“Then tell me.” It physically pained Cass to be so cruel. As violent and excitable as she was, the thought and action of this type of torturous interrogation wasn’t something she liked. She just wanted her family back. Her masters that had taught her well. Her fellow foot soldiers she had grown to respect. Her father— Her little sister…

Big Mama took a moment to catch a shaky breath. “W… when Yoshi tried to pull me through the portal I saw a little… glimsy-poo of where they were headed.”

“Go on.”

“The… rift stream did seem to… diverge a great bit, don't you know? I counted three separate eh… destinations.” She held up three claws, “And... on one of those little slipstreams I happened to catch sight of an Oni on the other side. Now, how to get to this Oni I… couldn’t tell you—“

Shredder started to crush her abdomen again and Big Mama’s words became frantic.

“But I know who can! Hueso Pirata— a calaca in the hidden city! He is skilled in all things mystic, and he can tell you where that rift went! And if he cannot, then Baron Draxum may be able to.”

Cassandra considered. “How do I get into the hidden city?”

“Why, you can use my charm of course! The spider emblem around my neck! In fact, there is a doorway to the Hidden City just outside this damned stadium— in the statue! I can take you to it!”

“No need.” Cass ripped the tag from Big Mama’s neck and turned it around in her hand. “I can do it myself.”

~~~

“Open!” Cass held the emblem out to the statue but nothing happened. She growled and went at it from several different angles. “Open! ¡Abierta! ¡Abierto! Aita! Ouvrir! I’m running out of languages! Abrir!”

She growled her frustration as the statue stayed a statue. She backed off and pulled out her Naginata.

“Wise guy, eh? GOONGALA GOONGALA!”

She charged the statue and hit it repeatedly, circling around it to strike it at every possible angle. All that served to do was tire her out and make her back up once more with a frustrated roar.

“WHY YOU LITTLE—“ She growled and started to spit off insults at the inanimate object and its dumb, inanimate face. “...pathetic excuse for a statue now OPEN SAYS-A-ME!”

The rift opened. Cass immediately settled and gave an excited squeak. “Oh. Yay!”

~~~

Hueso ran out of the kitchen at the first sign of a struggle. It took only a few seconds for him to locate the disturbance beside the bar and force his way between a startled and confused chupacabra and furious Kudan.

“Oye Oye, calmate! What is the issue?”

“I do not know!” The chupacabra answered in Spanish, cowering behind the calaca. “I sit here, I drink, and he got mad!”

Hueso glanced quickly between the two yokai, and then to the dish before the chupacabra before he quickly put a story together. 

Hueso turned to the kudan. “Ah— sir, you are upset of the Sangre De Cabra, yes?”

The goat snorted, muttering a few choice words in Japanese before switching to english. “Of course I am! He shouldn’t be allowed to drink that in public!”

“It is his nature, he does not understand why you yell at him.” Hueso turned back to the chupacabra and offered him some quick reassurance in spanish before gently guiding the kudan toward the back of the restaurant. “I will give you a private booth and take half off your order for the inconvenience, please no bad reviews.”

By the time Hueso finally got the furious yokai settled down, there came another disturbance in the dining area. This one went far beyond the normal customer disagreement. There were screams, and the sounds of tables being flipped and ceramic breaking. Heavy foot traffic as Yokai raced for escape.

Hueso didn't hesitate. He didn't freeze up or panic or try to run. In this area of the Hidden City, break ins were common, and with his background they weren’t much of a big deal. He could deal with the Mud Dogs like a mother scolding her misbehaving children, and he could send heinous green running for the hills with little difficulty. This was his shop, his livelihood, and nothing could take that.

“Por el amor de Dios, you chose a bad day to mess with me.” He growled and reached to unlatch the macuahuitl from his belt.

He backed up flat against the wall as his eye searched around the corner for the attacker, and found what appeared to be a human girl brandishing a bent naginata and an attitude that was bigger than she was. 

“HUESO PIRATA! I DEMAND RETRIBUTION!” She slammed her weapon into a series of decorations.

“No! My calaca art! So it’s a personal vendetta is it…?”

“SHOW YOURSELF!”

“You should tame your aggression, little girl.” Hueso finally stepped out into the open, holding his macuahuitl at his side. “It may get you in a world of trouble.”

“ARE YOU HUESO PIRATA?!” She pointed her weapon at him.

“Yes, I am, but please spare the decor! It wasn’t cheap.”

Her face remained furiously distorted a minute longer before she switched to an almost calm state as if flipping a switch.

“I understand. My father owns a store. Very proud of it. No more smashing.” She pointed the blade at Hueso again. “Unless it’s you!”

She screamed as she jumped from the table and charged Hueso. Hueso didn't move until the last minute, when he stepped out of the way and brought his club to strike the base of her skull. As she stumbled, she somehow managed to turn the assault into a counter attack, spinning and bringing her blade to swipe at Hueso. Hueso stepped back, though not fast enough, and the blade sliced through his shirt and what appeared thin air where his stomach should have been.

Hueso gave a shout and held up his club against the kunoichi’s blade to keep her from wounding him anymore. From the previous wound inflicted started to flow a type of blue substance, like blood but the wrong color. 

“Little girl—“

“The names Cassandra!” The human growled, finally getting strength enough over Hueso enough to shove him off of her and send him crashing into the wall.

“Cassandra.” Hueso corrected, taking a moment to collect himself while Cassandra circled for an opening. “Could I perhaps ask what fault you take with me to attack me on work hours? And could you not settle for a free appetizer and coupon?”

When the attackers only response was a furious growl, he charged a wide circle around Cass trying to get behind her while she spun on her heels to keep him from achieving such a feat.

“Grrrr hold still!” Cassandra shouted. “Stand still so I can hit you!”

Hueso charged her quite suddenly and landed a quick swipe at her arm, which promptly disarmed her of her weapon. She looked down at the weapon, up at Hueso, then back down and up again. The she gave a primal scream and charged Hueso full force, catching him off guard as she lifted him by his waist and slammed him hard onto the face of a table without giving so much as a flinch as he wailed his weapon against her back. The table gave way under their combined weights and Cass ended up landing on top of Hueso with her knee pressed firmly to his neckbone.

“Your times up, Hueso Pirata, and you’re coming with me…”

[thirsty-x1]

Don’t Lock Me Up I | Han Seungwoo

|| Part 2 ||

Request:

Hi can you do a jealous/make up sex with Seungwoo?

↬ Pairing: Seungwoo x fem!reader

↬ Genre: Smut

↬ Warnings: explicit language, oral sex, possessive!Seungwoo, unprotected sex, verbal degradation (usage of words like sl*t and such).

↬ Word Count: 2.4k

“So how have you been, y/n?” Wooseok’s voice sounded sweet, his eyes completely focused on you. “Is everything good with Seungwoo?”

You laughed. “Of course, why wouldn’t it be?”

“You know… He didn’t show any weird reactions, right?”

The way his voice seemed to have a rather accusative tone made you tilt your head.  “Is there something you’re hiding from me?” Wooseok chuckled and got closer to you, putting his arm around your shoulders.

“There is so much you have yet to discover about Seungwoo.” The exact moment he finished the sentence, your beloved boyfriend appeared.

“I already paid for the dinner, so we can go now.” Seungwoo’s eyes seemed to be fixed on Wooseok’s arm holding you.

“Ah, you’re such a considerate hyung~”

The younger patted his shoulder, walking past by and whispering something on his ear that you couldn’t quite catch, but that provoked Seungwoo’s demeanor to change immediately. You walked together towards his car but he seemed rather distant and lost in his thoughts.

“Are you feeling unwell?” He shook his head lightly, but didn’t say anything else. “Ah, you might be upset about Wooseok joining us without a warning, right? It was quite unexpected, to say the least…” 

He remained quiet during the whole ride back to your apartment. You started to fidget with your fingers, wondering why he was acting like that… Was it because of the money? But he offered to pay for everything… It wasn’t like him to get all silent like this out of nowhere, since he always replied to your questions with an outstanding amount of patience. Was he sick? Was he going through a hard time with something but didn’t know how to come up with it? Maybe he was waiting to get somewhere private to discuss it… What if he wanted to break up? Or maybe, just maybe, it wasn’t such a serious business, maybe he was simply tired or didn’t feel like talking at the moment. Yeah, that must be it.

Finally you got to your destination and even if you had calmed down back in the car, you were still nervous and your mind running wild with all kind of negative thoughts. He opened the door of the car for you, as he always did, and walked to the inside of the building.

“Do you want to stay the night?” If you spent more time together, Seungwoo might feel comfortable enough to tell you what he is thinking about. Again, he just nodded and went with you inside. “Coffee?” Another nod.

A sigh escaped your lips whilst preparing the coffee, being absent minded for some good five minutes, pouring it in two mugs and taking them to the table where Seungwoo had taken a seat. You sat in front of him but he wouldn’t look at anything except the steam of the hot drink in front of him. You had enough of this.

“Can you please tell me what’s wrong?” Your voice came out shaky and your eyes were open wide while waiting for a reply that made your heartbeat calm down.

“Since when you became so close with Wooseok?”

You blinked a few times, his words leaving you perplexed. Wooseok?

“What does he have to do with anything? Did he do something to you?” He scoffed at your response and now you were beyond surprised.

“I saw the way you were looking at him.” … What? “You didn’t even flinch when I came and he was hugging you. Were you trying to provoke me or something?”

“I wasn’t looking at him in any way, though? And he wasn’t hugging me either…”

“Don’t lie to my face, please.” Finally he looked at you, but now that you saw his eyes… It didn’t seem like it was a good sign. His jaw was clenched, his stare seemed filled with despite.

“I-I’m not lying to you, you’re just distorting things–” He got up quickly and you did too, taking a few steps back.

“Distorting things? So did you push him back? Did you noticed how close he was to you, how he looked into your eyes and your lips back and forth? That’s how it looked from where I was standing.” He came closer and you couldn’t help backing away more.

“I don’t know what has gotten into you, but it was nothing like that.” You flinched when he suddenly pressed you against the wall.

“It seems you forget who you belong to when I’m not around.” He lifted up your chin, staring into your eyes intensely. This time you didn’t say anything. “Let me remind it to you.”

He picked you up smoothly, carrying you to the bedroom and threw you to the bed. His fingers were quick to take off your clothes, leaving just your underwear on. Hands roaming down your body, touching your breasts, your abdomen, your legs, slightly scratching your curves making your back arching at the feeling.

“This… this is mine.” His voice dropped low and his left hand stopped to cup your pussy. “Everything this is mine.”

This was a new side to Seungwoo. He had always been sweet and soft with you, especially when you two had sex, always asking before making anything, always checking in your reactions, his tender touch as light as a feather, but right now things were different. His grip was rough, his strength being obvious each time he did anything, his words cold and his stare dominant, his lips aggressively marking your whole body as his, getting you wetter and wetter.

“You look so pretty like this, so, so pretty…” All that you could let out were moans and whimpers, things happening too quickly for you to process them logically. “Get on your knees.”

You obeyed without thinking, your body following his order as if it was used to it. He unbuttoned his shirt, revealing his hard abs, lazily taking off his belt while looking down on you, the sight turning you on beyond anything else. He pulled out his half-hard cock, spit on his hand and stroked it a few times, never breaking eye contact. 

“Be a good girl and suck my cock.”

You sucked his cock before many times, but he never asked for it, let aside demanding it. He got closer, your hand replacing his, starting to jerk him off slowly, his saliva shining on it. You licked the tip and he hissed at the sensation, feeling more confident you dragged your tongue along the vein on the underside of his shaft and then going back to the head, swirling your tongue and tasting his pre-cum until you closed your lips around it, bobbing your head to take him deeper, hollowing your cheeks. It wasn’t too different from what you usually did, but what he did next was: he placed his right hand in your hair, yanking it slightly, controlling your rhythm and pulled you apart for a few seconds.

“I want to fuck that pretty mouth of yours, will you let me do it?” You nodded ambitiously and he smirked.

You opened up your mouth and he felt like dying right then. He started moving slowly, throwing his head back, his grip in your hair tightening as he thrusts deeper into your mouth until he feels his tip reach the back of your throat. He checks on you, locking his eyes with yours before doing it again, and again, each time harder and faster than the previous one. You tried to relax your jaw and take it, but one particular movement had you gagging around him and Seungwoo moaned loudly. 

He pulled out, a string of saliva connecting your lips and his cock, and swiped the tears rolling down your cheeks, sweat dripping down the side of his face. He signaled you to lay back in bed, spreading your legs when you did, a smile tugging on the corner of his lips as he looked at you.

“Who knew that my sweet princess could be such a slut…” His hands touched your core over your drenched panties. “Getting wet from me fucking her throat.”

“Please…” The whimper came out unconsciously as he took off your underwear and rubbed your pussy, spreading your wetness to your clit.

“Hm? Is there anything you want?” His fingers caressed your outer and inner lips, avoiding your nub on purpose.

“Please, make me cum.” You blushed blurting out the bold statement. None of you was very vocal in bed, but maybe you were discovering new sides of him and also of yourself.

“So needy… But you don’t deserve to cum.” He slipped two fingers inside of you without any warning, your breathing hitching up as he fingered you roughly only to stop when you moved your hips to feel them deeper. He let out a small sigh and pulled out his fingers, your desperate complaint making him smile again. “Learn to be patient and you will be rewarded.”

He positioned himself between your legs, grabbing your thighs to bring you closer to his lips, his hands holding your hips still as his tongue licked a stripe along your folds. You moaned, any slight touch feeling like too much: his lips closing around your clit, his tongue going inside of your hole, the wet noises being too lewd, his stare burning you. The moment he saw your expression change, he stopped, and you felt frustration invade you again, your orgasm being dissolved into nothing.

You felt him get off the bed and watched him as he undressed, each motion radiating calm and elegance. One of your hands started to slide down between your legs, stopping midway when he gave you a severe look. He got closer, dick in hand and filled you up in one thrust, your sight getting blurry at the feeling of being completely full and stretched out.

“Still so tight, no matter how many times I fuck this hole…” You clenched around him at his words and he grunted, his hips snapping forward as a reflex. He wanted to hold back but it was too much. The image of Wooseok touching you flashed before his eyes and he felt fire spread all over his body, thrusting inside of you mercilessly, not paying attention to anything else except making you his.

“I’m so close, please…” Your whimpers, your high pitched voice, your sweat, the way you couldn’t control your breathing, your hazy eyes, the feeling of your hands holding on to him, this is what he always wanted to see you like. So fucked out that you couldn’t think in anything besides him.

“Who do you belong to?” He muttered the words right next to your ear, his slightly hoarse voice melting you.

“You, Seungwoo, only you…” Hearing his name muffled in a moan and you knowing that you are his is everything he wanted and even more.

“Cum, baby.”

And you did, tightening around him as you felt him bury deep inside of you, staying still as he came, the warmth of his orgasm making you reach your own. He hold you, planting soft kisses all over your face and caressing your hair gently.

“Are you ok? Was it too much? I’m sorry…” The drastic change made you laugh out loud, a furious pink tinted his cheeks as he tried to hide. You placed your hands on both sides of his face, staring at him with full devotion, his heart growing a size bigger at the sight.

“It was great. I really, really enjoyed it.” Ah, there it was. That dumb expression plastered on his face as he got shy. He pecked your lips, the kiss becoming deeper and growing more passionate until he pulled away, giggling softly.

“I don’t think I can keep going right now, let me catch a break.” His lips touched yours once more before getting away and pulling out of you, both going red at the sight of his cum dripping out of you. “Want to take a bath? I can prepare it.” 

You nodded, covering yourself as he left. You stared to your clothes scattered all over the room, the bed a literal mess. As you were tidying up a bit, you remembered what caused all the outrage, and it came into mind that Wooseok told Seungwoo something before leaving. Could that be what switched everything around?

You entered the bathroom only to find Seungwoo already inside the tub, eyes closed and hair slicked back. He looked at you with a sweet expression as you got inside, his arms wrapping around you as you laid back on his chest. The curiosity was too much and you simply asked him, there was no reason for him to hide it, right?

“Hey… What did Wooseok tell you?” He hummed in response. “You know, back in the restaurant…”

“Ah… Nothing important.” You could hear the embarrassment in his voice.

“Seungwoo.”

“…”

“I need to know what made you act like that to understand you, yes? You never snapped like that and questioned my intentions. So what was it?” He let out a sigh, defeated.

“Don’t laugh.” You nodded, already holding back a smile. “He was trying to provoke me… He knows that I have, uh, a slight problem with being possessive and all that but when I started dating you, I could control it easily. He just said something along the lines of ‘I bet I could fuck her better than you.’ Pissed me off. First, you are my girlfriend, why would he talk about you like that? Second, no, and third, he was touching you.“

You really were trying hard to not laugh. Did he really go batshit crazy because of that? Was it that easy to fool around with him? You were almost surprised.

“Well, I get it. But don’t ever, ever doubt me again, yes? I love you and only you and no one would fuck me better than you do. Don’t lock me up in a cage for things like that.” You left a kiss on the palm of his hand before placing it right above your heart and he melted, again.

“I know… But the cage idea sounds interesting.” He chuckled when you shoved him playfully, his lips pressing against yours once again before laying his head on top of your shoulder.

I FEEL SO DIRTY AFTER WRITING THIS, oh my god, I’m so sorry Seungwoo snoopy, ily

I’m sure Wooseok would later send a message to y/n saying something like “You’re welcome.” followed by a “Invite me next time so I can win the bet.”

~Nani

unedited

[sadienita]

Maison des cartes - The High Priestess

Shapeshifter!Gahyeon x Reader (feat. Youngeun of Rolling Quartz)

Word Count: 6.4k

Contents: wild animal attacks, animal violence, some gore, yelling, aggression

Previous | Next

~

loss of inner voice repressed feelings

~

You grabbed the papers and got up off the floor. At least laying down had helped you out. You hadn’t hit your head or hurt your back and that was good. The house itself wasn’t big so you were hoping that creaking sound was the front door. You didn’t know how many rooms there were but something had opened.

However your stomach sunk when you walked into the hallway to find the front door closed. You tried the handle but to no avail, it was still stuck tight. You were still trapped. But all the rooms on the main level had been covered right? Other than a small bathroom that you couldn’t get into that afternoon.

You froze as faint sounds of whispers hit your ears. It sounded like a woman’s voice, but she was saying so many things at once, some in languages you didn’t know. You kept your breath quiet, knowing that whatever was there could see you anyway, squeezing your eyes shut as your heart raced and the whispers grew louder, as if getting closer.

Finally you spun around, if you were going to die you might as well face it.

As soon as you opened your eyes the whispers stopped. A whimper left your lips as you spotted the open door in front of you. That door had been jammed shut in the afternoon and yet now it stood open with a flight of stairs beyond, leading up to the second floor. Clearly, that was where you needed to go next.

“I hate this, I hate this so much.” You grumbled under you breath as you climbed the stairs. “It’s so much worse going upstairs.”

The floorboards creaked under you feet and you grimaced with each step. Something was definitely watching you now and you could feel it. But you had no choice but to keep going until you could get that damn door open.

An open door down the hall caught your attention and you moved towards it slowly. Something about the upstairs was even creepier. It was more dusty, more cobweb covered. The floor creaked more and it looked untouched, as if no one who had broken in had made it up here.

A whine left your lips when you peered in the open door. The room was full of furniture, all of which was covered in white sheets, as if waiting for the day someone came back. The only thing uncovered was a large, king sized bed with posters and hung with a light, airy, albeit moth eaten fabric.

Your eyes landed on the card sitting neatly in the middle of the bed.

“Well at least this time I have a bed to lay on,” you muttered as you walked through the room and climbed onto it. You placed the music next to the pillow before taking a deep breath and grabbing the card.

~

You gasped as you sat up suddenly, your lungs greedily sucking in the air they had so sorely lacked. There really was no way to get used to that horrible feeling but at the very least it was less and less disorienting the more times you did it.

You looked around quickly, trying to get your bearings. You were in a small tent and you could hear the din of voices and excitement outside. The circular table you had been laying on was covered in a messy pile of tarot cards. You organized the pile, trying to figure out where you’d been dropped when someone pulled back the curtain for the door.

“You have one more for today.” The woman peering in said.

“One more…?” You questioned, knowing you probably sounded dumb.

She rolled her eyes. “One more fortune to tell,” she sighed.

“Ah,” you said, feeling tense. “Send them in.”

You heard chatter and what sounded like a protest before a young woman was pushed into the tent, clearly a little disgruntled over being there. She smoothed out her skirt and straightened the shawl over her head before sitting across the table from you.

“I’m Gahyeon,” she said plainly. “I’m sorry about this, my mother insisted I have my fortune read before I marry. I know your day was almost over.”

“It’s fine,” you hummed, trying to figure out how you would read her fortune. “Uh, take some cards.”

She quirked an eyebrow at you, clearly not buying it, but doing it anyway. You watched her hands, assuming you needed to do something to help her and wondering what it would be. She handed you the cards and you caught sight of something on her wrist, what looked like a tattoo, covered mostly in her clothes. Some kind of animal.

You placed the cards on the table slowly, having no clue what they meant but stuck on the tattoo. Was there a chance she was a shapeshifter? Could you make that guess? Maybe not all the ones you met would be witches. Maybe some would be something else.

“Can you touch each card for me?” You asked, hoping it didn’t seem like you were stalling. Gahyeon rolled her eyes again but did as you asked. As she reached across the table her sleeve pulled back and you caught sight of the tattoo of a leopard on her wrist, so lifelike you thought it might jump right out of her skin. You regarded it until she pulled her hand back quickly, tugging her sleeve down and your eyes snapped up to her face, just catching the pendant hanging around her neck.

Another leopard.

“You-” You stopped, properly taking in the cards and recognizing all the ones you had seen in the house so far. You still weren’t sure how to read them but could that really be a coincidence.

“You wanted to know about your marriage?”

“Look you really don’t have to do this. I don’t really believe in this stuff anyway but if I don’t do it my mom will freak out. She thinks it’s a bad omen or-”

“A cat.” Gahyeon stopped talking, staring at you with wide eyes. “That- uh- you’re like a cat, that’s what I’m getting.”

Perfect, now you had to bullshit something. But you were guessing that your suspicions were correct, at least.

“You’re independent, you like to have control over your life but-” you searched the cards below for more words and their faces stared up at you, giving no help. “You feel… turbulent.”

“H-” Gahyeon seemed in shock as she listened to you.

Might as well run with your hunch. “You need to find control and balance or this- all of this- it’ll all fall apart. You can’t build a future like that, without control, without a sense of who you really are.”

Gahyeon stared at you, mouth gaping. She was shaking slightly and you were worried you had overdone it but at least you knew she knew you knew what she was. Either that or you had frightened some poor woman half to death. But you thought your guesses might be right and what she needed was to learn how to control it.

“That will be all,” you collected your cards and she clamped her mouth shut, nodding numbly before stumbling her way out of the tent. You organized the cards into a neat pile before slipping out the back of the tent.

~

You wandered through the busy carnival as the sun slipped lower in the sky. Lights came on as you did so, drenching the whole place in colour. Everything seemed as if you were viewing it in a funhouse mirror. Things seemed just a bit too exaggerated and distorted.

You wondered if this was a magic carnival. That might explain why it was so odd, well more so than a non magical one anyway. Then again you still didn't even know where you were taken. Were you in your own world? In a different universe? A different time? You had no clue, just that you had to help in some way.

At least you had a clue this time.

You wondered where Gahyeon had gone. Meeting up with her was your next step but you weren't sure where she might be. At any rate you wandered to the outskirts of the carnival, hoping to spot her leaving and gazing at the forest just beyond the open field.

You didn't like this place. There was something so unsettling about the lights, about the cartoonish features of the space around you and it felt as if it was just a little bit outside of time. Like things were standing still in the worst sort of way that made your stomach lurch. The further you got from the music and the lights the more calmed you were but something about it still freaked you out.

"You!"

You jumped at the sudden angry yell as you looked around before your eyes landed in Gahyeon, her face flushed and her expression unkind.

"You're the one!" She stalked towards you and you stepped back. She nearly closed the distance anyway, grabbing the front of your shirt and speaking to you in an angry whisper. "How did you know?! No one is supposed to know!"

“I-I- Your tattoos,” you said quickly, shaking slightly from the sudden confrontation.

“You can’t tell anyone!”

“I wasn’t going to!” You said quickly. “I want to help you.”

Gahyeon regarded you skeptically. “Why would you want to help me?”

“Because I can.” Those were bold words. “I think I can, I mean.”

Gahyeon let go of you. “Well someone needs to,” she muttered. “I can’t get married like this. I can’t…” She took a deep breath. “It’s getting dark and I need to get home.”

“I’ll come with you,” you blurted out and Gahyeon gave you a strange look.

“Why?” That was a good question. Why should she let the random stranger who freaked her out stay the night?

“The carnival moves,” you said, hoping that seemed like a legitimate answer. “I don’t have a place nearby.”

Gahyeon sighed before looking at the darkening sky. “Fine, just hurry up. We don’t have much time before nightfall.” She grabbed your hand and pulled you with her away from the carnival.

~

Gahyeon’s cottage was cozy. The little fireplace filled it with warmth that staved off the nip in the air outside. She was a good host, even if she did seem a bit wary of you. She was the first not to trust you so quickly but that was fair. She didn’t know you. She just knew that you knew her secret and you were saying you could help her.

Which you hoped you could.

She knew. She knew she was a shapeshifter so that was the first step. She already knew that she did change but you were guessing she had no control over it. Arem had an enchanted necklace. Did Gahyeon need one too? She had to do it on purpose right? She had to practice to be aware of herself, to remember who she was.

“Stay in your room,” as Gahyeon took away the tea you were sipping on she gave you a warning. “Lock it and stay in there. I know that I’ll change tonight but I can’t control myself. I’m…”

“You’re barely aware of it, like it’s not even you.”

She looked at you sadly. “I almost wish I didn’t learn, didn’t figure it out. It would be easier if I didn’t know. Now I- it’s like I can see through its eyes but I’m trapped inside. It’s hazy and spotty what I remember but it gets stronger every time.”

“You can learn to control it,” you said. “You will.”

Gahyeon didn’t meet your eyes. Instead she looked out at the moon, rising through the sky. “You should go to your room.”

“Are you sure you’ll be okay?” You questioned.

Gahyeon set the mugs in the sink. “I’m not the one you should be worried about.”

You nodded slowly before rising from your seat. Gahyeon motioned to your room and you went into it, giving her a half hearted good night before closing the door. You locked it the way she’d told you and heard her locking the other side. The minutes ticked by and you looked around the room, grabbing a book and sitting on the bed to read it.

You heard the front door of the cottage opening, creaking on its hinges. Footsteps in the main room before something crashed to the floor. You rushed out of bed and to the door when you heard Gahyeon’s groan and stopped. You listened through the door, knowing she told you not to come out but worried that she might be hurt.

Until you heard a growl.

A low, saw-like growl. You kept your breaths quiet as you pressed your back to the door, wondering how strong it was. She had lots of locks on it. That had to be for a reason. The growls outside the door got closer and you pressed your lips together to keep quiet.

A roar came from the other side before a loud bang on the door. You clamped a hand over your mouth to keep from screaming as claws scratched at the far side of the door and another roar came before Gahyeon banged against it again.

Tears stung your eyes as the bangs and roars continued. You pressed your back against the door harder as if that would keep it in place and buried your face in your knees, biting down hard on your lip as if the sound was what was tipping off the beast outside.

You mouthed silent “pleases” as you squeezed your eyes shut, hoping for a miracle, hoping for something that would keep you safe. The question crossed your mind again.

Could you die?

A howl in the distance caught your attention and the growls stopped. You listened to the silence for a moment before the large paws on the other side of the door bounded away, running out into the night.

~

Your back hurt as you started, waking up from your sleeping spot against the door as Gahyeon called your name from the other side. You shook out your head, taking in the way the sun streamed through the windows and shakily you stood. Your hands were unsteady as you undid the locks on the door and slowly opened it. Gahyeon had a somber, guilty look on her face and you let out a gasp when you saw the back of the door, scratched up with deep gouges.

“I’m sorry,” she breathed shakily. “I lost track of time. I-I should have left sooner.”

“I’m okay,” you said, nodding quickly. “I’m fine and that’s what matters.”

“Wh- What do I do?” She asked. “H-How do I stop this?”

You moved through the room and sat on the couch slowly. “I met another.”

“You did?!” She said.

You nodded. “In- Well somewhere else. She has this necklace that could stop her from changing.” 

Gahyeon’s hand came up to her own pendant, thinking. “It was enchanted?”

“I think so.” You said.

“Then I need one, I need to get something enchanted.” Gahyeon stood up and started rummaging through her things.

“Do you think it needs to be specific?” You asked.

“No it’s not that I- I need something to pay with. Things like magic are never free.”

“Money?” You asked, already knowing the answer.

“No, some…” Her shoulders dropped as she picked up a glittering flower broach. “This was my grandmother’s. I was supposed to wear it for my wedding.”

“You can give something e-”

“No,” she said. “No it has to be special to me. Otherwise it’s not worth it to her.”

“Gahyeon…”

She shook her head. “Come on, she lives close to here, just a couple hours walk. We can make it there and back before sundown.”

Gahyeon took your hand and pulled you from the cottage. You wrapped yourself tighter in your clothes in the chilly morning air. She led you into the shade of the forest quietly, keeping her eyes away from the claw marks on the nearby trees. Away from what looked like a dead animal out of the corner of your eye.

“How long have you-”

“You don’t have to do that,” she said.

“Do what?”

“You don’t have to pretend to care. You don’t have to talk to me like I’m-”

“You’re still a person.”

She’d eyed you. “I’m not so sure about that.”

“Well I don’t like the silence, so humour me.”

“Fine,” she muttered. “I don’t know when it started exactly. I know about two years ago I realized I was blacking out, losing my memory. I thought it was nothing, just fatigue and forgetfulness. A few weeks ago I… Well I realized that it wasn’t just fatigue. I realized I was changing. That’s when I noticed the tattoos, like they were hiding from me and one day they were just… there.”

“Do you remember last night?” You asked.

“I wish I didn’t,” she grimaced.

“Ah.”

She sighed. “So what about you? How do you know so much?”

“I-I-” You chuckled nervously. “You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.”

“I shapeshift into a leopard. Is it crazier than that?”

You thought for a moment. “I’m not from here.”

“There’s got to be more to it.”

You sighed. “I was… sent here. I’m… I’m trapped somewhere else and the only way to get out it seems is to figure out whatever I’m supposed to do here.”

Gahyeon laughed. “You were right, that does sound crazy.”

“Hey!”

You carried on chattering on your way through the woods. The walk was long but Gahyeon seemed to warm up to you a bit and it was nice to talk to her. It was different from the others, but you had a clear path here. You knew what your goal was pretty easily this time. You just had to make sure you did it.

The woods around you grew thicker and though the air chilled you it didn’t scare you so much. Maybe you were just getting used to this all. How many days had you spent on these quests now, and yet only hours had passed at home. It seemed impossible, but then from the second the door was locked none of this was possible. Still, you might as well go with it at this point.

Soon enough an old, gnarled tree came into view ahead. A door was visible in the front of it and eerie lanterns that gave off a yellow-green light hung around the entrance. The sight was spooky but Gahyeon seemed calm, if a little somber, as she walked you closer and through the door.

The inside was hazy, thick with some kind of smoke or incense. Gahyeon pulled you close to her side as you looked around and she stopped you from stepping any further.

“She’s a powerful enchantress,” Gahyeon whispered. “And unlike you, she actually can see what’s to come.”

“Why didn’t you come to her in the first place.”

Gahyeon rolled her eyes. “She can be…  Just- Let me talk, okay?”

“Okay,” you hummed.

Gahyeon took a deep breath before leading you through the dwelling. Around the center of the tree the smoke got thicker. You coughed slightly, waving away some in front of your face before seeing the young woman sitting ahead of you. Pink hair cascaded over her shoulders and as she turned to look at you, you could see that her eyes were white and milky.

“Gahyeon,” she smiled slowly, her voice was gentle and high. “And you bought a friend.”

“Youngeun, I know you told me not to come back b-”

“You need me to enchant your pendant.”

“Y-Yes,” She said. “You know I’ve been having trouble and I-I brought something you might like.”

“I don’t want anything from you, Gahyeon,” Youngeun said. “I want something from them.” Youngeun’s gaze shifted to you and she pointed at you slowly in a way that unsettled you.

“Youngeun they just came with me, I-I’m the one who-”

“If they’re not willing to pay then this is over,” Youngeun said simply.

“I’ll pay,” You said quickly. “Gahyeon you need this.”

Gahyeon pressed her lips together but nodded. Youngeun let out a giggle. “Splendid! Give me the pendant.”

Gahyeon quickly handed her the pendant and you stood back and watched as she started to speak in a strange language. The pendant glowed thoroughly under her hands as she did so and her eyes grew brighter, shining out into the room. You shifter closer to Gahyeon, a little afraid as Youngeun said her incantations. Something about it was very unsettling and you were starting to wonder what you had agreed to but you couldn’t back out, this was your only way home.

The moments ticked on and the glow started to fade as Youngeun’s words grew slowed until she finally stopped. She picked up the pendant and handed it to Gahyeon who rushed to hang it around her neck.

“You must change,” Youngeun said. “If you don’t change once a month it will break. Your true hope lies in control.”

Gahyeon nodded quickly and Youngeun reached for you. Gahyeon pushed you forwards and your hands found Youngeun’s, unsettled by her unnaturally strong grip. She squeezed and you felt a rush of emotion run through you, like all of your recent memories were playing right in front of your eyes.

“You have been on quite a trip,” she smiled, the image of her hazy before you. You watched as older memories played in your head, reaching into your past. Youngeun reaching into your past into moments you had nearly forgotten. You tugged back a little but her grip remained strong and you felt dizzy. 

“Youngeun,” Gahyeon hissed.

“Fine,” Youngeun released you. “That was more than enough.” Gahyeon pulled you to your feet but Youngeun grabbed you before you could leave.

“You won’t die, not for real. But unfinished business needs to be finished.” She turned her head to look at you. “Make sure to finish it.”

“Okay,” you choked out and Gahyeon pulled you, thanking Youngeun and dragging you from the house.

~

Weeks passed by and the chill in the air got stronger. Gahyeon left at least once a week at night to change forms. You knew she hated taking off the pendant. You thought about what Arem had said, about how frightening it was not to remember what happened. You worried about her being all alone all night, about when she changed back and woke up somewhere strange.

But she seemed to be changing. She seemed more able to remember what had happened. More of it was sticking around and you thought maybe she was accepting it little by little. That seemed to be important and even though you felt you weren’t doing all that much at the moment, you were happy progress was being made.

You sipped at the tea in your mug as you sat on the couch, looking out the window at the colours of fall, still only a few leaves on the ground but brilliant colours filling the top branches, as if meeting the fiery sky at sunset. Gahyeon had left to see her fiancé for the day. They didn’t meet all that much and for good reason but she seemed a little more excited about the whole thing recently.

Your name was called excitedly as the door flew open, Gahyeon with a bright smile on her face. Her happiness was infectious, tugging at your lips and making you giggle before you even knew what was so amusing.

“You had a good time I’m guessing?” You said.

“More than that,” she chimed. “I mean the visit was wonderful but that’s not what I’m excited about.”

“It’s not?”

Gahyeon shook her head, still grinning. “I changed, on purpose.”

“Wait really?!”

She nodded quickly, holding your hands. “I did, it was harder to change back but I did it on purpose and for the first time it was all so clear! I can remember everything, I was so aware, so in control this time.”

“Gahyeon, that’s awesome!” You smiled.

Gahyeon reached around beyond her neck and undid her pendant before handing it to you. You looked back and forth between her and the piece of jewelry, feeling a bit wary.

“I want to show you,” she said. “I want you to see it, it’s so cool.”

“A-Are you sure?” you asked.

Gahyeon got up off the couch, “It’ll be fine, you’ll see.”

You gripped the pendant tight in your hand as you got off the couch nervously. You watched as Gahyeon took a deep breath before curling forward, spotted fur sprouting from her body. She transformed before you, growing larger and stronger until she lifted her head.

Her eyes were still the same. They still looked like Gahyeon’s as you called her name nervously, unsure if she was really still there or if she had gotten overzealous. She regarded you curiously, stepping a little closer and sniffing the air. Your heart pounded out of your chest as you reached a hand forward cautiously.

Something in her eyes shifted, her expression growing colder. A low snarl passed her lips.

“G-Gahyeon?” You asked, stepping back. “H-Hey.”

Gahyeon started to stalk towards you and you scrambled back until you tripped on the uneven floor and fell backwards. She reacted to your quick movements, pouncing forwards as you covered your face with your arm.

Fabric tore and ripped and you let out a cry of pain as her claws sunk into your skin. She cut through the flesh of your stomach like butter, in a smooth swipe that left you dizzy, screams tearing out of your throat in pain and fear as blood flowed down your side.

Gahyeon growled louder and somewhere in the back of your mind, some small part of you trying to keep you alive remembered the pendant. You peered at her and brought the pendant up in front of you just in time to stop another swipe.

Gahyeon stumbled back and whined. You let out gasps as you tried to call her name and your hand came to cover your side, ending up covered in blood.

“Gahyeon, I know you’re in there, please,” your voice was weak and your brain foggy but it seemed to do the trick. Gahyeon’s eyes shifted again, full of sadness before she shifted back, growing smaller until she sat up from the floor, panting and distressed. She rushed forwards and grabbed the pendant, fastening it around her neck again, her hands shaking as she tried to speak and find something to help you.

“I-I” Her words didn’t seem to come out as she pressed part of her skirt to your side, trying to soak up the blood. “I- y-” 

“Gahyeon,” your voice was breathy. “I need s-something.”

“Y-Yeah,” she nodded quickly, pulling off the layer of skirt and left it with you as she rushed to the kitchen. You panted, the pain searing and setting your body on fire. You pressed the fabric into your side a little harder, knowing you were bleeding through it.

“Th-This,” Gahyeon brought a bottle to your lips. “It’ll help with the pain, a-and stop the bleeding.”

You drank it gratefully, feeling it sink through your body. The pain receded somewhat, though it still hurt. Gahyeon brought another bottle to your lips and you drank again, missing what it was but feeling a tightness in your stomach, groaning at the feeling.

“I-I have bandages.” 

“Okay,” you sighed, closing your eyes and feeling dizzy. You heard Gahyeon run off and come back before she pulled the fabric away from your side. You started to waver in and out as Gahyeon gave you apologies, “I’m so sorrys” falling off her lips as she covered the wounds in your side.

~

The trees grew more and more bare in the weeks that followed. Gahyeon could sense your tension but you weren’t sure how to let it slip away. With her pendant on she was safe, she wouldn’t hurt you, and she had apologized enough times for a lifetime. She also helped with your bandages and went out to get more.

The potions she gave you helped, they dulled the pain and helped it heal but even so as it healed enough to not bandage it it still seemed that a scar would be left over. You didn’t know how long it would last. What happened to your body here didn’t happen in real life, right? You couldn’t die, right?

You took more walks when you could, and Gahyeon usually tagged along. You knew she was worried about you going out on her own, even if she was too nervous to change around you anymore. She was treating you like glass but you knew she felt guilty about the whole thing.

“I never liked this part of fall,” you said, breaking the silence.

“No?” She asked.

“No,” you sighed. “I like when it’s bright and colourful. But when all the trees die and you’re just… waiting for winter.”

“I don’t mind winter out here,” she said. “It’s pretty when it snows, you’ll see.”

“It’ll be chilly,” you said, “but I can imagine it.”

Gahyeon nodded, moving a little closer as the breeze blew through. “What were they like, the other one like me?”

“Arem?” You asked. “She was nice, or she is I suppose. She was aware of herself better when she shifted, she said it took months of practice.”

“Was she- Was she okay? Like was going to be?”

“Gahyeon,” you said. “You can do this.”

“I keep thinking, what if I get married, and we’re there in the same house in the same bed? And what if I change in the middle of the night and suddenly I don’t remember who they are? What if they just look like a…”

“I don’t think you’re supposed to be afraid.”

“How can I not be afraid?” She cried.

“No no,” you grabbed her hands. “What I mean is, I think you need to accept it. It’s a part of you. I know you’re scared, I would be too. But maybe, I don’t know finding some peace with it, accepting that it’s a part of who you are for better or worse. Maybe even making it better.”

Gahyeon was teary-eyed as she regarded you. “I don’t know if I can do that.”

“I don’t think you have to right now,” you said. “But maybe it would help, maybe it would let you feel more in control all the time.”

“What do you think happens if I never learn to control it?” She asked.

“I don’t know,” you said. “I don’t know.”

~

The last of the leaves were still clinging to the trees as the first snowfall of winter came. Months had passed since you first arrived. Cold clung to the air and the fireplace burned almost constantly in the little cottage, keeping the two of you warm. Gahyeon had the door replaced eventually and the scars on your body remained, though faded as if older than they truly were.

“Thank you for coming with me,” Gahyeon called to you as you swung the axe down into the wood.

“It’s no problem,” you grunted, pulling aside the broken logs, now the right size for the fire.

“It’s rotten work,” she said. “It’s hard, you didn’t have to.”

“I’ve been living here for months,” You laughed. “Helping out is the least I could do.”

“Hey, when are you leaving, not that I don’t like having you or anything but, what’s your plan?”

You stopped, stretching out your back. “I’m here as long as I need to be, until I figure it all out.”

“You almost sound like Youngeun,” she muttered and you laughed.

“I- Look as crazy as it sounds I just get dropped into these places.” Gahyeon stopped and leaned against a tree, giving you a bemused smile. “I’m here until I’ve helped you and then I’ll go. I don’t really have any say over it.”

“You were sent to help me?” She asked. “Like an angel?”

You snorted. “I don’t know if I would say that, but yes I’m here to help. I mean I woke up here right before you showed up in my carnival tent.”

Gahyeon thought quietly for a moment and you put another log down to chop, wanting to get a few more done before it got too dark. Gahyeon said a few words to herself and you let her think, giving her time and space to do so as you chopped. A few more swings of your axe before you looked back up at Gahyeon.

And your blood ran cold.

Three wolves stood behind, haunches raised and lips pulled back in silent snarls as they stalked closer to her, no doubt looking for a tasty dinner and thinking they had found it.

“Gahyeon!” You screamed, stumbling back into the snow and pointed towards the beasts. She looked up and ducked down just before the first pounced. Your heart raced and you screamed as you lost sight of her and the wolves turned on you, stalking towards you, the snarls on their faces almost like twisted grins. 

“Gahyeon,” the name fell off your lips like a whimper as you ducked down as much as the snow would hide you, screaming as the biggest wolf pounced.

A streak of yellows and blacks streamed in front of you and the wolf howled in pain. Your eyes followed the sight to the large leopard that was growling and pinning the wolf to the ground before slashing at his face.

You couldn’t help the whimpers that came from you as you looked away from her to the other two wolves who had chased after and were biting at her. She seemed to throw them away easily. No match for her strength, though their attacks were persistent. You watched her bite and throw them off of her until a closer growl caught your attention and you noticed one of the three moving towards you.

“Gahyeon!” The screech burned your throat as you covered your eyes and heard the sound of another growl before the whimpering of the wolf. Your eyes searched and found it wounded and limping and Gahyeon stood between you and the wolves and let out a ground shaking roar.

The wolves whined, finally backing down, whining and lowering their heads before taking off in search of other prey. Gahyeon watched them until they disappeared and her growling quieted. She shook out her head before changing form in front of you, back to the small woman you knew.

“Come on,” she said, “Quickly in case they think it’s wise to come back.” Gahyeon supported you to your feet and helped you back to the cottage, trying to calm you the whole way.

~

The sun was streaming through the window but you didn’t wanna get up just yet. Your warm, fuzzy pillow was too comfy to just get up and leave. You nuzzled into it as you tried to shake the bad dream of wolves chasing you down from your mind, shifting as your pillow shifted.

As your pillow… shifted…

You sat bolt upright and gasped before clamping a hand over your mouth. The large, warm, fuzzy pillow was in fact a large leopard. Your brain tried frantically to parse out what was dream and what was real from the night before as she stirred, blinking and then lifting her head.

There was Gahyeon behind the eyes, but you stayed frozen. You had been here before. Had she learned enough? Or would she forget herself again?

Gahyeon let out a low, chattering sound and a sigh before dropping her head down again. She just seemed tired but you were still afraid to move. Then again if you were remembering last night correctly she had saved you from those wolves, and lost track of her pendant in the process. She seemed to not be able to sleep, maybe from your own nerves, but she lifted her head again with a grunt before nudging you.

You let out a nervous chuckle and watched as she cautiously placed her head in your lap and gazed up at you with sweet eyes, almost as if pouting. You gently brought your hand to her head and petted her, earning a low rumble from her that had to be akin to a purr.

You stayed like that for a while, smile spreading across your face at her gentleness. She shifted over, chattering again until you scratched her chin and purring more loudly when you did so.

“You’re only staying in this form to get affection,” you teased.

Gahyeon let out a disgruntled grumble as she stood slowly before nudging you with her nose. You chuckled at her and watched her change back into her human self.

“I wasn’t, it was just nice and comfy and warm with all the fur.”

“Sure,” you giggled.

Gahyeon rolled her eyes. “I’m going to go and find my pendant.”

“What happened to it anyway?” You asked.

“I don’t know,” She said. “I threw it off and didn’t even think about it. I just needed to make sure you didn’t get eaten.”

“Thanks for saving me,” you smiled.

A grin tugged at her lips. “Will you be here when I get back?” She asked.

“I don’t know,” you said.

“Well then,” she took your hands. “Thank you.”

“For getting into mortal danger?” You chuckled.

“No,” She hissed, playfully whacking your arm. “For believing I could do it.”

“Hey you just needed someone to believe until you could,” you said.

“Yeah I think so,” she nodded. “At any rate, I couldn’t have done it without you. So, thank you, guardian angel.”

“You’re welcome,” you giggled. Gahyeon pulled you into a tight hug.

“And if I don’t see you again, I’ll miss you.”

“Yeah, I’ll miss you too,” you replied.

Gahyeon let go of you and grabbed a coat before heading out the door with one last smile back your way. Even as she did you sucked in a big breath as the darkness wrapped around you. The words “A souvenir” echoed through your mind in a familiar voice as you were swallowed in shadows.

~

initiative inner voice

~

You breathed in deeply, feeling like you were getting better at holding your breath. You thanked the soft bed under your body as you turned your head and watched the card disappear, the sight no less eerie than the first time. You rested a hand on your stomach as the paper appeared and felt something odd beneath your shirt.

The blood in your veins ran cold as you lifted it back to reveal old claw scars on your stomach.

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