#aroace humor

[aroaceloverofgarlicbread]

I've found my one true love

Whenever I see them, they brighten up my day and I become happy. I wanna be close to them and they're all I think about. I want them inside of me. I love them so much They're pieces of Garlic Bread. I'm talking about pieces of Garlic Bread.

[lgbtqtext]

[asociallyakwardpotato]

Person: so what's your body count?

Me: *tries to count on my fingers* goddamit I don't have enough fingers... um I think 213?

Person:

Me: oh you meant sex... welp guess my body count's going up to 214 *gently murders person*

[aroace-cat-lady]

Aroaces aren't playing for your team. Or the other one. Actually, you could say we don't even like sports.

[nightndaydreaming]

Call me a polyamorous aroace cause I’m fucking around with me, myself, and I

[steepwysdom]

How it went for me

[starofthelake]

Alloromantics: My gosh, how do you carry yourself so confidently? What's your secret?

Me, an aroace, leans forward and whispers: My arrogance. I've aced it ;)

*proceeds to walk away with no explanation*

[aroace-people-are-lgtbq]

Student: Just pretend you are interested, are you more attracted by personality or looks?

Me: *beat of aroace confusion* Personality?

Student: Ms. M, really? That's weird

Me: I did tell you that you were asking the wrong person

[trianglesarehot]

Luffy likes his women like his vegetables

Given to someone else 🤣

[theoneandonlyailat]

a work comedy about two bartenders always complaining about customers/friends/sex life and the whole time it feels like they’re about to fall in love but they just never do, call that aromantic bitters

[why-are-the-allos-like-this]

"But are you head over heels for THEM?" I mean, if I wasn't I'd be lying

"Are you head over heels" Yeah that's how standing works

[lgbtqtext]

[rottingwithers]

No, you misunderstood. When I said I can’t feel romantic or sexual attraction I wasn’t complaining, I was bragging.

[theaceofarrows]

It's always: "Do you like boys? or girls?"

And never: "Do you like piña coladas? or getting caught in the rain?"

[mostly-funnytwittertweets]

[acexualien]