#anyways...ill be thinking about park forever....

[jellophoid]

finished yakuza 5- haruka the entire world loves you,,,,

okaaaay finished yakuza 0, let us see if we can watch the rest before the new game comes out👩‍🍳

[uracutieraka]

awkward

I know you hurt me, but (hey) This is more than a friendship

✭・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭

Iwaizumi Hajime x F!reader

Tw! Smut(ty-ish), mutual pining, being used (or so reader thinks)

✭・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭

synopsis ; Hajime heard rumors about you, and since you were his close friend from childhood, he obviously has to go out of his way to see if they're true.

✭・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭

it's your third year and obviously that means rumors are still being spread by any and everyone who enjoys gossip.

this time the rumor was about you.

"She's been with over 5 of the guys on the volleyball team"

"She's had 15 boyfriends from what I heard."

A bunch of bullshit really.

You had never been with anyone.

At least that's what your life long friend Hajime had thought.

But now that he's thinking, the past year you've been really strange and distant.

Disappearing and reappearing at odd hours of the night, to strange locations.

Hajime only knows this because he has your location, naturally, he's your best friend, he's got to watch out for you however he can.

At least that's how he explained why he needed your location to you anyways.

You on the other hand, had found an interest in photographing run-down and nearly abandoned parts of your home town.

Sneaking around at 2:30 in the morning made it easier to get into these odd, sleazy places.

That was until a few weeks ago when a group of boys from the school caught you walking around a risqué club chatting with a few older men who you knew from your first year when they were third years.

And that's how you ended up in this situation.

4 large men towered over you, spouting off a jumble of questions.

“How come sawaka says he saw you mingling up with some shifty old guys at a strip joint?”

The tall dark haired boy, issei, asks. His arms are crossed and hes giving you a near parental eyebrow raise.

“W-what?” You stutter out. Genuine confusion on your face.

“You heard him! Now answer!” The tone of oikawas voice almost sounds like a whine from a child more than a demand.

“Gah! You guys dont control me!” You gather up your things and stand.

“And just where do you think youre going?” Makki now opens his mouth, but you know hes just antagonizing the situation, he probably couldnt care less about whatever you got up to in your own time.

“Away! Forever!” You say dramatically, leaving the classroom to enjoy your lunch elsewhere.

That night your phone rings, around 12:30 am.

Your eyes look up from your notebook that youd been doodling in for the past 4 hours.

Answering it a gruff voice speaks out

‘Can i come over? We need to talk.’

Iwaizumi seems upset.

‘Yeah of course, ill meet you down the street.’

10 minutes role by and you make it to the little park down the street from your house, just as Iwaizumi arrives.

He looks good, he’s starting to fill out and looks more manly than ever.

“Hey…??” You say in a questioning manner. You couldnt tell how he was feeling right now and then pit in your stomach was growing ever since he said those words.

“Your parents are still out of town?” He asks making his way past you to start the walk back towards your home.

“Yeah, for another 5 days i think? Who knows.. hah..”

Smooth, jackass, real smooth.

“Ah! Thats lame, i dont know how you stay home alone all the time like that.”

The mood lightens a bit with his goofy tone coming out slightly.

Hajime had always been the more serious one out of the two of you but that was never the case when it actually came down to being just the two of you.

He always was cracking jokes and acting like a fool, just to get a smile from you.

“Yeah, me either, i just stay up in my room now, i guess.”

“Seems boring.”

“Eh.” You shrug your shoulders, unlocking your front door.

You two make your way up to your room, not before raiding the kitchen for snacks and drinks first though.

This felt normal.

Like old times.

You honestly couldn’t remember the last time you two had hungout like this.

Over the past year you had drifted away from him, only because you couldnt help yourself.

Your once innocent thoughts about the boy youd grown up with had started becoming more and more…colorful.

The way his hands looked when writing, all the years of volleyball had definitely done good things for the man.

His arms were veiny as well as his hands.

His shoulders were broad and made him looks 10 xs more masculine than he already did.

Not to mention his voice had significantly dropped and his voice cracks had almost completely disappeared.

He was becoming a man and you were becoming a woman. And women have needs.

So instead of being selfish you separated yourself from him.

“So, you wanted to talk?” You ask, shoving a handful of popcorn in your mouth, sitting crisscrossed facing him on your bed.

He shifted to sit criss cross to face you now.

“Yeah, about the stuff going around school. You know, the things people are saying about you.”

“What about it? Its not true. If thats what youre wondering.”

“I mean- i didnt think so but…” you cut him off before he can say anything else.

“But you just had to figure it out for yourself?”

You knew him too well.

You saw something in him shift, a sudden energy overtook the room, one you hadn't experienced before.

He looked at you, "Yeah. You could say something like that."

"What do you mean?"

The way he looked back up at you after you had asked that sent a warm heat through your body.

"I mean, I've seen your location, why are you running around dirty parts of the city in the middle of the night? Are you really down there...doing things?" He seemed upset for second but then became stern again.

"Things? Like what? Partying?"

"I guess."

"No.," you sigh rolling your eyes as you lift yourself off the bed, reaching for your laptop. "I've been doing photography of the nightlife and shit."

He takes the laptop from you when you offer it to him, clicking through the hundreds of photos you'd accumulated over the past year.

After a bit of silence he speaks up.

"Wow, y/n, these are," he looks up at you and gives you a huge smile. "amazing! Holy shit dude! Why didnt you tell anyone about this?”

“Because i wanted it to be my own thing that i do for myself.”

He hands you back your laptop and you close it moving to set it on your desk.

A sudden change in energy yet again settles around your room.

Hajime is looking at his hands fiddling with his thumb and index finger, youre re-situating yourself on your bed when you look back up at him.

You know third year is coming to an end, which means he’s going to California soon.

You open your mouth to speak to him.

“I got into UCLA.” You say confidently.

He now looks up at you eyes wide.

“What?” He asks, wondering if maybe he misunderstood.

“I couldnt just let you go to the US without me. That wouldnt be fair y’know!”

He lifts off his side of your bed and tackles you down in a hug.

Positioning himself to hover above you now he has a giant grin on his face.

One only youve ever seen, hes goofy, and totally a sports nerd, well mannered, and sweet. This is a side of him only youve ever gotten.

“Youre not pulling my leg are you?” He give you a near-disappointed face.

“No. Im serious.”

“Ok.,” His eyebrows furrow and he turns his head for a second, a blush spreading on his face, with a huff he looks back at you. “Im…im glad youre coming. And im glad youre not out partying and getting with other guys.” He looks more serious than before.

“Other guys?” You raise a brow at him.

His face gets even redder than before.

“Well, yeah. I just figured you knew that i liked you….”

“You just ‘figured’ that i knew that you, hajime, liked me, y/n? And how exactly would i have figured that out?”

He rolls off of you now laying next you looking at your ceiling.

You’re nervous. He likes you? The guy that you’ve spent your entire life with like you…back?

“I dont know. The guys said it was obvious so there was no way you didnt know.”

You give him a blank stare into the side of his head.

“You are the biggest idiot i have ever met.”

He now looks at you, you can see him visibly shrink in on himself.

A few moments go by and you turn your head back to look at the ceiling.

“I love you.”

He sits up turning to look at you laying down.

“I love you.”

You sit up and your guys faces are so close you can see the faint scars on his face from all the roughhousing over the years.

Hes looking at you blankly, unable to comprehend that you might actually love him.

You roll your eyes at him. Knowing exactly how hes reeling in his own head.

“Im not lying, i love you.”

He gives you a raised brow.

You huff and lean in closing the distance.

He kisses you back, his hands snaking up around you, under your tshirt.

Hajime had been with a few girls before. He had told you about it, obviously.

Honestly you shouldve been more upset at the fact he was being a total hypocrite right now.

Things had heated up, he was between your legs, caging you beneath him, you had your hands in his hair, holding his lips to yours.

He was grinding up against you, you were moaning into his mouth.

Next thing you knew he was ripping your clothes off and you were pulling his off of him.

He ran himself over your wetness and let out a groan.

Pushing himself into you, you let out a loud gasp at the sudden splitting feeling.

He kissed your jaw whispering in your ear.

“You ok?”

You moaned and rolled your hips forward a bit, to signal you wanted him to move.

He began moving back and forth, slowly at first, until you begged him to go faster.

Soon he had your leg up on his shoulder and was leaning over you, leaving kisses down your jaw and neck.

“H-haji-,” he leaned up, not slowing his pace. “M’ gonna- m’gonna”

He threw his head back pulling your hips to match the pace of his thrusting, he was going deeper and harder than before, the knots were tightening in your abdomen.

“Do it.”

With that you let go, seeing fireworks fill your vision.

“F-fuck!” He pulled out cumming on your stomach.

He got up and retrieved a washcloth from your bathroom, cleaning you up.

Getting dressed again you laid back down, him in his boxers next to you.

But he was facing your wall. You felt a ping of hurt in your chest as you crawled back into your bed, where the boy you loved had just deflowered you.

“Haji-“ you spoked but stopped when you heard a soft snore leave his mouth. A sigh left your lips as you faced the other way and closed your eyes. Youd just talk to him in the morning.

✭・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭

Morning rolled around and you found yourself in the middle of your bed. Looking around you didnt see hajime or his things. You stood out of bed and looked to your clock.

5:45 am.

You grabbed your phone, opting to call him instead of search around for him.

No answer.

You thought back to the night before and felt sick to your stomach.

Maybe you messed everything up.

These thought filled your head all the way to school.

When you arrived in the classroom you saw him sitting at his desk. Right next to yours.

You made a slow approach towards your usual seat, eyeing him like he was some sort of monster that would spot you at the slightest movement.

Sitting down you finally turned towards him.

“Hey.” You said soft enough for him to hear it.

He looked at you then turned away quick. Not answering.

You looked down at your lap, where your fingers were twirling anxiously.

✭・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭

This act kept up for 3 whole weeks. Not one word said between you two.

This was becoming a problem for your mutual friends on the volleyball team.

You had stopped coming around to practices and ignoring the other boys. It was lowering the whole teams morale.

Finally oikawa had enough and cornered you against a corner with the other 2 boys.

“What. The. Fuck. Is. Going. On.”

It wasnt a question. It was a demand.

“Nun ya.” You said crossing your arms and rolling your eyes.

Maki smacked the wall next to your head leaning down to make eye contact with you.

“Tell us now.” He was dead serious.

“Fine.,” you huffed looking away from them. “Hajimeandihadsex3weeksagoandheleftinthemiddleofthenightandhasbeenignoringmeeversince.”

“Woah-woah- you and haijime WHAT?!” Now mattsun spoke up shaking his head in disbelief.

“We had sex. And then he rolled over in my bed and went to sleep. And now hes ignoring me. And hasnt talked to me in 3 whole weeks.” You were looking at your shoes, tears had finally built up in your eyes.

Oikawa put his hand on your shoulder.

“Hey,” it was soft spoken, unusual from his normal behavior. “Hes a dick for that. You didnt deserve that.” He patted your back and motioned for the other two boys to follow him.

They made their way to Hajimes classroom telling him to come with them for an impromptu club meeting. He followed unknowingly.

They found themselves in the club room.

Hajime in a familiar position that you had been in by the same boys just a bit prior.

Oikawa, Maki, and Mattsuwaka had evil and dangerous looks on their faces. Hajime was scared.

Mattun spoke. “Whats your problem?”

Then oikawa through gritted teeth. “Youve got some explaining to do.”

And finally Maki, “How is it you bag the hottie whos our number one supporter and somehow you manage to fumble her?” Hes popping his knuckles in a threatening manner.

Iwaizumi gave a few dumbfounded blinks then spoke up.

“I uh-,” he was cut off by the three boys leaning over him more than they were before, closing out any light from the corner he was in. He cleared his throat and spoke again. “I came really quick. And uh. Im embarrassed to talk to her.”

The three boys all exchanged glances before leaning back up.

Hajime leaned all the way back up as well.

Maki reached out and landed a hard punch to the cornered boys stomach.

“You fucking idiot!”

Oikawa now spoke, “you know, y/n thinks that you hate her? She was crying over it earlier!”

Mattsun pushed hajime towards the door.

“You better go fix this. Fucking dumbass.”

✭・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭

It was 8:30 pm.

Hajime knocked on your door, hoping your parents were off somewhere for work.

You answered the door.

Hajime took you in.

You had on a too large Tshirt he knew to be oikawas, one you had stolen a year prior, during a group sleepover at mattsuns.

Hajime remembered you had been baking cookies in the kitchen with the tall setter when he caked you in flour and eggs. In exchange he offered up his sleep shirt, feeling bad afterwards about the mess he made.

Looking down a pair of his own boxers sat on your hips. Folded down a few times so theyd fit you.

They mustve gotten mixed in your laundry at some point. Who knows.

“Haji! Hi!” You gave him a wide-eyed stare. Caught off guard by his sudden presence after weeks of missing him.

He looked at you then down at his feet, kicking a small rock he shoved his hands in his pockets, looking back up to you he spoke.

“Im really fucking sorry y/n.”

✭・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭

You had only seen him like this twice in your entire life.

Once when he and oikawa broke your brand new guitar that you spent a whole summer babysitting and doing odd jobs to save money for.

Hes still doing chores for his mom to this day to pay off the debt of buying you a new one.

The second time was 2 summers ago when you and the other volleyball team members went camping for a summer bonding trip.

Oikawa and hajime were sitting next to you rough housing when the black haired boys elbow flew back and hit you square in the nose.

A quick *crack* sounded on impact.

He slowly turned his head to look at you, blood rushing down your face from your nose, your nose was already purple and crooked to one side.

“Holy shit. Holy shit, holyshit. Holyshitholyshit.” You panicked.

The other team members gathered around you, unsure what to do.

“We… we need to go to the hospital.” Hajime spoke up.

“You fucking broke my nose!” You were crying, trying not to touch your nose.

“Oh fuck!” Oikawa now said bring everyone back to earth.

With a rush you were in a coaches car with haijme holding you stroking your hair.

“Im sorry” was all he said to you for the 30 minute drive.

He never lived that down. But you werent too mad.

You got a free nose job and hes still paying off his debt for breaking your nose.

✭・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭

“Wha-�� you were cut off by him speaking again.

“I really really fucked up y/n. And im so sorry. I love you and i was embarrassed and didnt know what to do.”

“Not ignore me, maybe?” You huffed now annoyed.

“I know. Im sorry.,” he looked around then straight abck at you, now straightening his posture. “I love you too.”

You blinked a few times then began shutting the door.

He stopped you with his foot.

“Wait!”

You groaned loudly then reopened it.

“What? You really hurt my feelings and now you just want me to be like ‘oh ok, cool youre embarrassed you fucked me’ and move on?”

“No! I- i want to explain myself.”

You leaned against the door and rolled your eyes. “Fine.”

“I uh, i camereallyfastandthiughtyoudhatemeandbeembarrassediwasyourfirsttime.”

You now stood completely infront of him.

Your eyes yet again wide in surprise.

“So you ignored me because you came quick?”

He was now giving you the same dumb look you had just given him.

“Yeah.” It was quiet. Like a scolded child.

“So what? I came too, i dont know how all this sex stuff works exactly but i think were even.” You now had an eyebrow quirked up at him.

“Oh…”

“Yeah ‘oh’ you ignored me for 3 weeks because you came quick or whatever you just said.”

He now looked extremely embarrassed.

“How are you going to make it up to me?” You asked.

“Uhm,” he stood there thinking for a second. “How about a date? Tomorrow? 7pm? Wear something nice?”

You felt a smile grow on your face.

“Sounds good.”

“See you tomorrow.”

“See you tomorrow.”

Masterlist

[thecherrytarot]

𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐚𝐳𝐲.

pick a line to read a channeled message from your person.

listen to : like crazy by park jimin

pile 1 "I think we could last forever"

pile 2 "I'm afraid that everything will disappear"

pile 3 "Just trust me"

𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟏 "𝐈 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐰𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫"

𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟐 "𝐈'𝐦 𝐚𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐫"

if you felt drawn to pile 3 make sure to check it out as well!

"hey there! don't you know it? I'm the one for you, your lover, your other half, your reflection, your king. I will come to save you, I know this sounds so filmy and cheesy but I will come and save you from that locked tower that feels like is always on fire, don't worry I won't let those flames hurt you ever again. I'll help you with every single thing you worry about and fix them for you, oh wait you don't want me do to that? Alright, I understand that you need to grow on your own but I will help you cause that's what friends and lovers do. They help the people that they care about. Don't feel afraid that you might fall back down through this journey, I'm right behind you, I'll catch you. Let's go ride bicycles and don't worry I'll teach you how to do that properly. My friends call me a simp and say that I am down bad for you they are correct about that no lie but they are wrong about how 'cold' you are towards them. They do not know you as I do, they do not know that you just have your guard up but because you have doubts about trusting your gut instinct, they don't know about your anxiety or how shaky your hands get when talking to strangers but fear not I am here, I'll rub your hands when they shiver, ill do the talking and encourage you to do that, I know you don't feel confident about the language that I speak but dont worry ill help you with that too and im good at correcting peoples grammar lol. Something about our connection makes me feel that this was meant to be, the decisions we made were made for us to meet that day or in your words 'god brought us together as a blessing and an apology for the things that we went through.'"

𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟑 "𝐉𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐦𝐞"

i feel like many of you thought of your crush/ partner instead of your future spouse, then take however it resonates.

"I have so much to say, you are my favourite topic and also cause I have ADHD and I get hyperactive very easily. Anyway, I feel like you doubt our connection, you doubt if I am the one for you or are you the one for me and heck I even think you were doubting if this pile was for you aha got you, sorry I love teasing you and bothering you, you are just so cute and I love it when your eyes get big when you are surprised because of me, are they big now hehe let me take a picture fake clicking noises see? this is what happens when you date an introvert lol anyway back to the message I have so many doubts, they are filling my head and I can't sleep because of them no no don't worry they aren't always negative they are random but not the point sorry I keep getting distracted but what is the rating of this cause sometimes my thoughts get wild iykwim. I love the way you care for me, ask me in your sweet voice if I slept well or not and when I say no, I love how you let me rest my head on your chest and play with my hair cause you know that relaxes me. I had the best naps of my life in your arms. Please don't leave me, I am afraid that you will someday and I won't get to marry you as I have planned and no i don't wanna marry my games i want to marry you (not my games lol) sometimes i wonder if you feel like this too, these doubts of overthinking and our possible marriage. i feel like you do, so let's hopefully meet and talk about this topic and get it out of our system cause a little birdie told me that it helps."

" 'Just trust me' what a beautiful line, that's me saying that to you just trust me also look for pile 1, there are also messages for us there. I am a mess. I am losing my courage please come find me. I don't know what to do, I thought I would be fine but I am not. I have everything I wanted but this emptiness…it doesn't go away. I have been lonely for so long that I thought I would get used to it but I am not. I don't mind being alone but I mind not having someone to share my happiness, my sadness, my random fun facts, or just anything. I want to have my own family with you and maybe even kids but at the same time, I am afraid. I am so scared that our kids will end up like me and I don't want that to happen, I want our kids to love me and I want them to talk to me about their lives too, I had to cut off contact with my folks and I will never be able to live myself if our kids do the same with me. I am sorry I know I'm only talking about myself when this is supposed to be about you but what can I do? now that I have a chance to talk I'll say what I want to say in real life but am too scared to do so. When I am with you, you are all I can think of. I forget about my worries, my problems and these thoughts and just focus on you explaining something new that you learned today, it is so cute that you get so eager to tell me about it and I love it so much when you say things like 'oh i thought of you when i read/saw this and couldn't wait to tell you about it' it makes me feel so many things and i have never felt so happy. But when you leave those dark thoughts come back to me and haunt me. I feel scared to show you this part of me, you have an image of me being stable in your head and I don't want to taint it by showing you signs of weakness, I was never allowed to do that was i was young. I am sure you are aware that i struggle with my own shit, and i love that you don't force me to open up and patiently wait for me to do so cause you don't like it either when people force you to talk about your problems. Don't worry that day will come sooner than you think and our love will only grow stronger just trust me"

[somniumfaults]

My laptop needs to be fixed, so in the meantime! Here's my Tokyo Debunker OC that I've been working on!! Hehe <3 i love her and have both a drawing and fic wip of her waiting to be finished sometime ^^

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── ·

NAME: Misha

PRONOUNS: she/her

HOUSE: Sinostra (formerly Dionysia)

YEAR: 2nd

BIRTHDAY: May 17th

LIKES: cherries, pain/masochism

BLOOD TYPE: O+

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

“Who’s to say there will be tomorrow?”

Sinostra’s much needed second-year healer. Determined to live her life out to its fullest, she won’t take no for an answer, for better or worse. Some of her self-destructive habits worry those around her, but as long as she has no regrets, there’s nothing for her to lose.

Pinterest Outfit References

Taiga/Misha playlist

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

Motives: Take advantage of the opportunities you have to make the most of life and never let anyone take them from you. She was placed in Dionysia and transitioned into Sinostra when the house became defunct. Her placement in Sinostra was due to her resolution to be in control of her life no matter what. At the end of the day, she’ll do what she wants to do.

Demon pact: Sick of being chronically ill with an autoimmune disease no one cared enough to look into and the chronic pain, she chose to make a pact with a demon based on her anger at the idea of succumbing to her helplessness and the whims of other people. Her condition was not cured, but it is (almost always) forever at a stalemate as Buer’s ability to heal counteracts the damage done.

Stigma: Uber - can heal ailments* at the expense of an equivalent amount of her own blood

*ailments defined as temporary injuries or conditions. She can’t undo genetic conditions or change your brain chemistry.

Using her stigma allows for her autoimmune condition and chronic pain to reactivate due to the healing properties of her pact being redirected away from her. The more blood it requires, the worse she feels.

Due to the nature of her stigma, she can’t use it on herself because (a) she would be losing blood anyway and (b) accelerating the healing of other injuries would also allow for the acceleration of her autoimmune condition and risk injuring herself further internally.

Artifact: cherry bombs/m-80s

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

❣️ RELATIONSHIPS ❣️

★ Rui ★

Misha → Rui: close friends 🙂 she visits his bar often for some fun drinks and gossip. They partner up sometimes so they can make homebrew hangover medicine and various other quick pick-me-ups. She prefers to use her stigma when he’s around to help offset her pain. They spent a lot of time together in their first year due to being the only two ghouls in Dionysia and work together well. Hearing his voice helps calm her due to the familiarity that it invokes, and she wishes they could still touch each other like they could prior to the curse. She worries that he may be too lonely.

Rui → Misha: close friends! She's his closest friend on campus and one of the few people he truly trusts to voice his grievances to. He isn’t super enthused about their medicinal drink partnership because he knows the side effects on her, but he won’t lie that he likes experimenting with what can be made. Misha is the one who volunteered and pushed to do it though, so he can’t say no. He wishes she would take better care of herself.

★ Haru ★

Misha → Haru: her drinking buddy!! She thinks he’s adorable, especially when he’s all drunk and pouty. She had a fling with him in their first year but now they’re just close friends. She’ll come help out with the park if he really begs and owes her something, because she knows he’ll coax a mile out of her if she gives an inch. She does worry about him though, so it’s not strange to find her stopping by regardless to do small favors for him. Sometimes she sneaks him healing drinks Rui and her made to help give his body a boost rather than just let him down energy drinks. She admires his hard work a lot.

Haru → Misha: his drinking buddy!! He had a crush on her in his first year, but now they’re just friends. He feels bad taking her drinks when he knows they're using her stigma and usually protests if he realizes, but sometimes it's just easier for him to swallow the guilt and take it… He needs it, sometimes. He's a bit sad they didn't end up in the same house for their second year and wishes they could spend more time together. He dislikes that she ended up in Sinostra and is especially unhappy with her relationship and dynamic with Taiga, but he has to swallow his dissatisfaction and concern most of the time because he wants her to be happy. Even though he thinks Taiga doesn't deserve her.

★ Romeo ★

Misha → Romeo: her drinking buddy!! She finds him funny when she’s not the one having to deal with him, and her preferred setting for chatting to him is when they’re both at the bar with a drink. Their interactions can grow tense due to their respective stubbornness and refusal to back down from doing things their own way, but for the most part their day-to-day interactions only get snippy at most. At the end of the day, she respects him and his capabilities even though she disagrees with his attitude most of the time. If there's anyone who is determined to live his life to the fullest at Darkwick, it's Romeo.

Romeo → Misha: she’s frustrating to deal with but capable and more or less reliable, unless she thinks he’s being stupid and in which case she’s an IRB (incorrigible rogue brat). She has good ideas though, and has more drive than Taiga does nowadays, so he doesn’t actually mind her too much. It helps that while they'd never spent personal time together in their first year, it wasn't as if she hasn't already been engaging with and working with Sinostra due to Taiga and her stigma. He definitely abuses calling her whenever he needs help reeling Taiga in. Not that she's the perfect solution, but two people Taiga tolerates and has affection for in his own way is better than one.

★ Taiga ★

Misha → Taiga: they’re in some sort of committed romantic relationship, although it's complicated nowadays. She misses the way he was in his first year; they had interacted a lot because he needed blood in order to use his stigma and her stigma helped a bit with the brain fog side effects. (Although obviously she was not his entire blood source.) Still, despite his mental state clearly having deteriorated, she continues to like him a lot and loves the thrill he brings into her life. It makes her feel alive and in a way, even more in control of her life because the injuries she sustains with and for him are purely by her own choice. (She doesn’t spill blood just for Darkwick. She doesn’t have to heal anyone when she bleeds unless she wants to.) (Also she’s just kind of into it. Even if her brother despairs over her walking into his office with more than just your average hickey.)

Taiga → Misha: he is usually able to remember her at least after a few moments due to their extensive relationship through their first year until now, from work relations to romantic commitment. He finds her presence and voice to be grounding when he’s feeling poor and sometimes when he needs a break from everything, he makes her just sit with him and keep him company as he rests. Over time due to their blood arrangement, she’s become one of the few, if not only, people in his life he feels comfortable being vulnerable and weak around. He likes the feeling of her fingers in his hair. Her blood tastes good to him and he knows he feels better after having some of it (both with or without her stigma), and it's not unusual for him to spontaneously chomp down on her when he’s feeling peckish. Even if she were to protest, depending on his mood he’ll just smirk and/or grumble and say she shouldn't be leaving such a tempting snack out in the open like that then (showing skin).

★ Professor Nicolas ★

Misha → Nicolas: he's her older brother. She’s somewhat detached from him due to their age gap and him having rarely been home when she was younger (thanks Darkwick). Her initial reaction to him was tense and verging on hostile, because she wasn’t expecting to see him at Darkwick and felt betrayed for various reasons. (A) She was upset to see him knowing that he never called home and thought he didn’t care, which not only hurt her but made her angry because their parents missed him. (B) A part of her wondered if this was all his fault and if he planned for this to happen to her and (C) She was angry because if he had just been more present in her life, maybe he could have known about her situation and prevented all this from happening since he had access to superior medical facilities. After a time, she calmed down and forgave him more or less once she realized what the true dynamic/situation of Darkwick was with its staff and students. Now, she’s grown to appreciate his company and appreciate having someone she knows at the school. They have a comfortable relationship even if she finds his concern to be overly fussy at times

Nicolas → Misha: she's his younger sister. He holds some resentment and guilt in his heart towards himself and towards Darkwick for letting her become a ghoul, because he believes he could have stopped it had he been a more involved sibling and realized she was suffering. He also feels guilt towards hearing the confirmation that his family feels abandoned by him, but that’s soothed somewhat by the knowledge that he’s bound by his duties. Although also slightly detached from Misha by virtue of not having been a large part of her life consistently, he cares deeply for her and worries about the choices she makes and the risk of retribution towards her from Darkwick. Even though she's a ghoul and heals quickly, he wishes her and Taiga would show some restraint in breaking her skin or worse. (He doesn't approve of their relationship and dynamic at all, but he's forced to bite his tongue to keep the peace.)

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

technically this is still a work in progress bc she's my baby (oc I project onto) and I love thinking about her role in universe and elaborating on her dynamics w diff characters :3 but this is her "final" profile! Thanks for reading all that if you diddddd <3

shout-out and much thanks to @danieyells for their posts compiling info about the houses, stigmas, and more! They carried me a lot in making Misha, and you should definitely check out their posts <3

[fadeintoyou1993]

For this ask -

HOPE ANDREA MIKAELSON AND ELIZABETH JENNA SALTZMAN!!! The only characters to have ever character’d EVER

already did lizzie so hope <3

favorite thing about them: how much of a deeply pathetic loser she actually is like its literally so funny when people write her as someone whos like badass or like doesnt go to therapy because like that is literally not her she goes in canon to therapy every week or so or well she did in s01 but anyways lets not get into THAT lmfaooo but umm yeah so she goes to therapy weekly and she has like plants that she tries really hard to take care of and she bakes like every other day and she like watches.. wait ill conitnue this in the headcanon part so sorry

least favorite thing about them: literally nothing shes the most perfect girl thats ever existed:)

favorite line: when she said Who cares what lizzie saltzman thinks :( because like shes who :(

brOTP: hope and kaleb forever and ever and ever and ever and ever and everrrrrr :) also her and jed :) she would never fvuckinv talk to penelope park STOP trying it. and handon when not romantically. omg also halyssa altho i also ship them romantically :)

OTP: hizzie :) and handon because hope has two hands like landon said :)

nOTP: hosie literally the most disgusting fucking rotted bitch ive ever laid my eyes upon. stupid ship stupid fandom terrible fuckin vibes just rotted disgusted and gutted. i wisgh hope mikaelson had killed that girl so bad my god... hope literally gave josie the only thing that could kill her bc her ass KNOWS she not gonna see that bitch again so shes fine PLUS if she does see her she dies immediately after:)

random headcanon: ok so back to what i was saying before!!! hope like watches the randomest fucking cooking shows there are like she knows all of them and she can rank them by season and she knows so much fucking random shit and random information about the most random things and she like goes to the gym everyday and she like lowkey uses Pinterest and pins a bunch of random workout routines and art tutorials and shit like that like god shes so annoying i love her so much :)oh and shes so autistic actually

unpopular opinion: um i have so many :) i think she actually is a bottom sorry :) i dont think she can flirt either she just says things wholeheartedly because she is an autistic individual and people think shes flirting but shes just like that. she thinks shes really cool doing those one liners and stuff shes like im a hero and so i have to do my one liners :) and thats why landon and lizzie are obsessed w her because shes just like that.

song i associate with them: do you realize?? by the flaming lips

favorite picture of them: this one that she drew:)

send me a character and i'll tell you....

[demure2]

Blood is Thicker Than Wine _ ONE

> BLOOD IS THICKER THAN WINE [MASTERLIST]

— 1930s au

— yandere neighbor!chanyeol x reader || ft. best friend!sehun

— genre: angst, suggestive

— warnings: language, alcohol use, cigarette/substance use, mental illness, watching from afar, anxiety, gun, blood, older fella chanyeol

— word count: 3.1k

— note: this story has been in my drive for 3 years, even tho this is the first piece on my account. i even had a timeline at the bottom of my draft to make sure war dates and stuff lined up hehe. it's O.K. if this doesn't do well since i'm writing for fun, but i'm happy i got at least part one of this out! then i can finally put this series to rest. i’m sorry that this kinda introductory part doesn’t have many interactions with chanyeol yet. i want to accurately convey the reader’s relationship with sehun before i make it fall apart :)

Girls like you loathe compliance but act it, anyway. You go against rules and you wear two faces, but you’re still compliant because nobody knows. Nobody suspects a thing, and you’ll keep it that way.

There’s not much to it, really: keep your papers in neat stacks, your dollars in even neater stacks, and your mouth shut. It’s a commitment, but it's applicable to the art of both compliance and not. That’s how this town runs. Girls like you are compliant.

Lately, alcohol traffic has been wedging tension into champagne bottles ready to pop, like faulty cork stoppers. Tenfold, and you’ve seen it. Tons of progeny craft succumbing to the paradigm of unrelentless violations of law, but you swore to never break the rules. That includes even the unspoken ones, like knowing to not mess with the neighborhood weirdo, Mr. Park.

Technically, you were just helping your best friend Sehun deliver night mail. It’s part of his job. 

“What a hound,” Sehun pants, steadying himself by gripping the fabric layering over your shoulder with calloused hands. Orphically, his brown irises are suddenly void of any liveliness. He’s exasperated, pupils fitfully blown out wide, the onyx barrier warped in various ways. Ways that make him look wild, more unimaginably feral than the manor overgrown with vines and rusted trellises in front of you.

 “I gummed up the works on this one,” he coos, lowly. Sehun’s arm parts from your shoulder to clutch his heart, breath hitching. He shudders, even in the cooling night zephyr. “Guess your momma was right all along,” he breathes. Mimicking a high-pitched voice, “stop hanging out with Sehun! He’s a neighborhood no-good nick who delivers mail for a few cents!”

You grin, wide. “So?”

Sehun looks at you like a stray pet. “Town mail won’t deliver itself,” you offer. "You’re an author, too, delivering your own work. That’s important. Don’t say useless things to me, Sehun.” The tone of the night becomes less tense. Smirking, you continue: “relax, then tell me what happened in that freak’s house.”

Your teeth bite down on your tongue, eyes narrow and reflecting the moonlight. 

You don’t know why you’re expecting a longer, well thought-out response from the Sehun you’re looking at right now. His short hair damp from the sweat and mild rain, parted in awkward tranches - you’re not used to comforting him, although it feels good to be the one seeing Sehun vulnerable, for once.

While you’re waiting for Sehun to rearrange his thoughts, you run your hand against the bars of iron separating you from the front yard of the manor. The sounds are a symphony of metal clink-clanks against your graceful nails, free of overgrown cuticles or ragged whites, unlike Sehun’s. The bars are hollow iron, but their wounds are merely rusted scratches, like they don’t give in over the years. 

Neither does Sehun.

Lazed back. Real lazy. Doesn’t like thinking about what he is, why he is, who he is. He’s thought about it before; things like whether or not cabbage was really nutritious (it’s just water), whether or not he wanted to be a writer forever, whether or not he should tell you about the car shop home, whether or not he loved you more than just a friend. 

It’s fated, and so he doesn’t bother to delve deeper than what he needs to know. He just knows that it’s all bliss when he’s with you. And he knows that he’s in love with this life: the rush, the fights, hell, he had almost forgotten his dad was a cop. Just like magnets, though polar opposites, you stick together. Late night escapades into the apple of the town was just another habit branded deep into your history.

He feels like laughing at his own inanity, so he parts his lips, but not even the chuckle at the edge of his throat makes it past. Something irks him uncomfortably about what happened tonight, so he clears his gullet filling up with phlegm and blames the bright waning moon. It used to be so full of itself, now only a needle in the vista expanse of night. Sehun breathes harder now, because he realizes that they’re not so different.

Sehun finally speaks: “Well, I just tried to throw the freak his mail. But I think I set off his flares, doll. Mr. Park - he’s really a bent man, broken after the war. There was an iron on his hip, a-and as soon as I saw it leave his belt loop, I didn't have a doubt that he’s not wicked.”

Sehun’s joints ache uncomfortably despite wherever he shifts his weight toward, so he leans against the tall wire fence guarding the manor. He feels an ivy trickle down the nape of his neck everytime he tilts his head to the side. Nuances here, nuances there. Last time you both were out here, there weren’t any ivies. Were there?

Mr. Park stands leaning back, intently listening from the arch door frame that separated his balcony from his quarters.

These kids talk so loudly, he thinks, he could hear your entire exchange from up here. The yellow cast light from his bedroom fights with the dark to illuminate his figure carefully in the night, but he knows that you’re both still unable to see him from the ground angle. He feels slightly creepy, standing there in his satin dress shirt and work jeans. He pulls out his gun one more time, loosely, just to swing it. 

Feeling watched, you decide that you both shouldn’t be there any longer. Sehun’s teeth grind against each other eagerly for a taste other than his own metallic blood being drawn. Yawning, his mouth goes dry and his throat parches, longing for the feeling of smoke in his lungs.

Sehun knows he shouldn’t smoke around you. He doesn’t want to ruin your innocence, but he can’t help it. He wishes he had better self-control and restraint, but even so, you were clearly too much of a goody-two-shoes to care. “Drop dead Sehun, are you stupid? How’d he get a gun in this old town? Those are so hard to even-”

“Everybody knows they’re prohibited, doll. It must be ‘cause he’s a veteran, the govs decide that they don’t need to necessarily establish regulations with them,” Sehun glances up back at the house. You know he’s just said a bunch of nonsense.

“Somethin’ like that,” he continues. “Like it’s any work.” He almost scoffs, reaching into his pocket upon instinct. He doesn’t notice, but you’re intently watching. 

You follow his hands well, when he rubs the nape of his neck and pulls out a Marlboro from his tattered satchel. Same satchel that’s been long worn with dirt and grease but vacant of textbooks, pencils, or really a real use, ever since the start of freshman year in college. Sehun still stands that it serves purpose in his mail business. 

He shuts his eyes tight as he lights it between his lips, drawing out the smoke for as long as he can. It blows away in the wind, but you scrunch your nose, in the contingency it dissolves in your nostrils.

You pressed Sehun for more: “Don’t you care that Mr. Park’s gonna smell the smoke? His window’s open and he could still be on his balcony for all we know,” you advise him, worried. “And what’s Mr. Park doing with a gun at this hour, anyway? You could see it from the ground? Should we rat him out?”

Sehun shrugs, not letting on much. 

The smoke ignites something in you, you think. “Sehun, answer me! Isn’t this technically trespassing? Shouldn’t we leave now? All that stuff you said about Mr. Park’s makin’ me nervous.”

He finally feels free and empty of apprehension when he lets go of the cigar, balanced between his lips. He feels powerful. But before he can halt the smile that plays at the curve of his mouth, he chuckles a dry, derisive laugh laced with smoke. “Just decided to be nice this week and stop skippin’ his address on the newspaper list for once. Only trespassin’ if we go beyond his door, these front gates bind nothing,” Sehun smirks. “You should know that by now.”

Thin to a whisper, you display a frown. “I don’t hop as many fences as you. Who knows what else this Park guy has, he’s the real deal, gat and all. You should know that before you do anything else, you fool.”

But he grins right back, and he grins wide. “I should? How touché.” 

When he proves satisfied with the gasper, Sehun withdraws the smoke from between his lips and thrusts it toward the grass. It doesn’t burn the damp grass, barely at all. Just tucks itself neatly in a pile of dandelions, the tarnished flame still warmer than the muted yellows surrounding it.

Quickly, almost lunging himself off, Sehun hoists his body up from the iron gate and firmly turns his heel on the cigar, smiling. 

 And when he lifts up his shoe, even under the dim haze of the moon, you can see that the mud has been imprinted deep into the design on the sole of his shoe and the weeds have been stomped flat, butt of the cigar crushed. He finally lifts his eyes to converge with yours and he deadpans, “You know, you’re gonna want a smoke one day, too,” pausing. “Finally want one, doll?”

Doesn’t Sehun know how to properly take care of a girl?

His hand lazed onto your shoulder leaning on the gate post, your eyes glued to the dirt. He wants you to look up, but his gaze is the only thing holding you down. You can’t break free from his glare, lidded and dazed. 

Last night’s rain drips down the manor’s primary parapet beam. A premonition?

“I don’t need more mess in my life right now.” You hadn’t intended for it to come out so harsh and raspy, but Sehun didn’t pay much attention to it.. “Your parents are too pliant, Sehun.”

Mr. Park sighs a breath of relief. You can take care of yourself. He runs a stiff, left hand through his hair. He wouldn’t have to think about Sehun taking advantage of your company. He quietly hums an incisive tune, like a victory sequence. 

“Give it a try. I know your momma doesn’t like me so much anymore, thinkin’ we’re doin-this and doin-that. You don’t gotta do anything you don’t want to, alright?” He reassures you, something you’re grateful for. “I’m just saying, you can’t be such a high-pillow all the time and expect fun. Even if we landed in jail, my dad’d let us out,” Sehun tilts his head down to hide his smile under his breath, giddy.

“I’m not a high-pillow! Can’t we just go to the next address now?”

Ignoring your question, he’s totally replaying the scene over and over in his head. In his pocket, Sehun crosses his middle over his index. He did not like the feeling of mild defeat. At a weak attempt to cure his frustration, his hand rubs at his forehead. Instead, he’s inundated by the dewy sweat collecting at his brow. How could I let Chanyeol scare me off like that? 

You change the subject. Softer, quieter, your voice barely cuts through the air. “Sehun?” Your voice seems to awaken him a bit. Quickly, he mutters underneath his breath, “huh? What?” His mouth parts uncomfortably, small drops of rain collecting on his bottom lip and cupid's bow. 

“You look like tonight’s over. We can walk home now, you’re very pale.”

Sehun responds, an equally modest, “I’m okay.” Insisting, “let’s hang out a little longer,” pausing to offer a smile. “Gumshoe.”

A smile peels your lip open. “Oh yeah?”

Acquiescently, he smiles. “Oh yeah.”

“Then let’s get out of here.”

Sehun winces. “Not yet. Don’t bleed anything against me, ‘kay detective?”

Sehun steadies himself against the tall iron fence again, and it hits him like cold deja vu against his spine. The metal presses deeper into the valleys of his back this time like a knife, but still, he doesn’t move. Instead, he lets it cave against his skin even more, jutting through the fabric of his dress shirt. He takes another look at the smothered cigarette hidden in the grass and laughs a hearty laugh. All he smells is ash and wet dew.

And then, rather obscenely, it comes crashing down on him like dead weight. 

“You know, Chanyeol pulled the gun on me first, looking down on me from that balcony. Then tauntingly, he pointed it back toward himself. What would you do?” Sehun says honestly, turning to face you.

“His blown out eyes wide, but completely still. I’m so pissed that I was scared. Fuckin’ embarrassin’.” he grumbles, matter of factly, a frown thin between his lips as if he’s proven his own point wrong.

“Chanyeol?”

Fuck! “Oh, yeah. That’s his first name. Chanyeol. It means ‘loser’ in the ‘i-can’t-get-any-girls’ language.”

Chanyeol quirks a brow, leaning onto the side railing, still hidden. 

You can’t help but snort. “And why would he do such a thing? Was his tongue stickin’ out too?”

It’s hard to tell where the fabrication starts, but with a pat to your head and a hum in validation, Sehun opens his mouth to protest. “What makes you think he wouldn’t? He’s the town freak.”

Shrugging, you scan the line of trees enveloping the path down the hill. “No, I mean that he was makin’ fun of you with that face.”

 “Sure,” he nods. “But you cannot twist the truth, and the truth is all I’ve been telling you. Don’t you see? That’s creepy, he was pointing the rod at himself. I didn’t want to be responsible in case he actually pulled it, so I left, but now I know that he has no limits. He was ready to die, [Y/N]. This guy’s got no girls, and he’s creepy. You should stay away from him.”

Sehun’s story is like a leaky faucet. It holds enough truth to be believable, but somewhere in the piping, it doesn’t go over well with you. But you believe him. 

Your mind becomes numb and somber for a moment, but the feeling is botched. As if the anesthesiologist didn’t know better, unable to properly administer the drug, and you could still recall Sehun’s words in your head. They lay heavy on your heart, yet you’re not prosaically thinking into the consequences, at all.

Maybe Mr. Park wasn’t as insane as the town recalled him to be. Sehun suddenly speaks. “What a crumb, huh? I don’t think that man’s has mercy on anyone, not even himself.” 

An epiphany makes you feel sick, like a bully. Kids swirl baseless rumors around him. “What are you implying? That he’s lonely and lonely people are crazy?”

“I mean, yeah. He’s a vet, after all. What’s surprising?”

“Listen, you - I mean, Mr. Park, he-he doesn’t have the motive. Stop giving him motives. Rumors say he studied business after his discharge from the draft. That manor of his is built on years of liquified assets, why would he put it all on the line?”

Mr. Park stifles a laugh. You’re defending him. 

Sehun shuts his eyes to think, and for a second you think he’s going to reach into his bag for another cigar, but you think he’s really thinking this time. Sehun definitely knows he is; maybe it’s the lingering tobacco in his throat, maybe it’s the aftershock of what he just said, but he’s really thinking, fitfully. “I - I don’t know, [Y/N]. Maybe he deserves it, for all the people he’s killed.”

A flicker of candlelight moves in your peripheral vision. You nervously glance up at the manor’s ridiculously high arch windows, and wince in horror as the orange glow casted on the balcony shifts. It’s dimmer this time, because there is quite clearly someone blocking the light.

 And the silver alloy shotgun in their grasp gleams under the lunar projection, very, very jeeringly. 

They stand there, eerily forlorn. Lacking real tone or emotion, barren. A machiavellian with a .357 in the limelight pointed dejectedly at the ground. The candlelight behind the figure filters around the silhouette like a stencil on a black canvas, a ghastly spectacle.

And as his arm rises, gun following your bodies, a ghastly spectacle, indeed. It’s hard to tell who he’s aiming at because of the distance. 

The only thing more daunting than the sight itself was the sound of silence. Sehun mutters a curse beneath his breath, beginning to crouch next to you on the dirt. You feel his hands lightly traipse your torso, yearning for your palms in the dark. He first finds your thumb, tender on your clavicle. Then your index, playing with your blouse cloth. You’re glad he doesn’t feel your heartbeat above all, otherwise he would have felt the throb of fear and the mop of tangled love strings evident in the moment. 

Instead, he squeezes your palms together and intertwines your fingers on a whim. Sweaty and scared, they mangle like ropes. He doesn’t know what he’s doing at first, but it was the only way he knew how to provide enough ease for the both of you. It always offers him a little warmth; besides, you were both in danger.

You shudder. “The cover here isn’t good enough,” you whisper. “I bet he’s been listening in on us, Sehun. You see his gat?” Your teeth are chattering now, despite the cooling atmosphere.

“I don’t know what your mama tells you dolly, but now ... we fucking run.” He wants to tighten his grip on his hands on you further and take off like that, but he knows your nature and psyche too well to do that. 

Your chattering halts, “He’s going to see us. And shoot us.” Suddenly apathetic, Sehun finally muses, “Alright. Let’s stay here until that husk of a man leaves.” He exhales, blowing the strands of black hair from his eyes, “promise.” 

Sehun was never very good with promises, and you realize that too late. The fingers caught in yours are already replaced with air and are instead wrapped around your wrist. He juts out his hip, and rises to his full stand. He’s very tall. “Sorry doll. Lied.”

Your stomach sinks. “What are you, a puppy? Do I have to pick you up myself?” He’s towering over you, height teetering past the gate that separated Mr. Park’s property from the town’s. “Sehun, get down, there’s going to be a metal shell in your head anytime now!” With a swift kick to your knee, he pulls you up from the dirt before you can even feel the jolt against your joints, and runs against the wind with you.

[deadwriter16]

Hi.... If you don't mind me asking, can I ask, what are your top 10 (or top 7) favorite media (can be books/ manga/ anime/movies/tv series/games/etc) and your top 10 favorite characters from any media ? Why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this questions before or if I accidentally send this ask twice.....

Hi! Sorry I'm super super bad at managing my inbox but I am finally answering you, so sorry it took so long!! pls forgive me

as far as media goes, i dont have a rank order or anything really but here are 10 pieces of media i really enjoy:

i wouldnt say these are my top 10, but just some i really love

fruits basket (anime) - most ive ever cried watching anything. watched this during my last year of high school during the peak of college application season and it altered my brain chemistry forever. i will never be the same

assassination classroom (anime) - watched it in middle school and therefore formed a deep and unhealthy obsession with it, also karma is THAT BITCH. amazing show. also so like oddly sad

new girl (tv) - my favorite television show OF ALL TIME

how to get away with murder (tv) - my favorite televison drama show OF ALL TIME

always sunny (tv) - still watching this one but i LOVE it, shows about fucked up horrible people are my favorite, also i really love and admire their writing style and i really want to embody it on a show someday. definitely a huge writing inspiration for me

arrested development seasons 1-3 (tv) (i liked 4 and 5 but 1-3 are incredible) - again, a show about incredibly terrible people, and also really fucking funny in a weird way. and super clever. i love it

sherlock (tv) - i LOVE murder mysteries so so much. also theyre super gay which is fun

soul eater (anime) - my first anime ever, will love it forever

penguins of madagascar (movie) - i am unironically saying this, i am not fucking with you, this is my favorite animated movie

saturday night live (tv) - a classic. i haven't really traversed past the 21st century but i watch it every weekend without fail.

a special eleventh is A.P. Bio, amazing show never should've been cancelled. objectively i can completely understand why it was canceled bc there wasn't anything really objectively special about it, but by god do i love that show anyway. i rewatch it all the time

honorable mentions: on my block, sex education, the office, community, one day at a time (2017), how i met your mother, parks and rec, disney XD's lab rats (also unironically. great show.)

As for characters:

This is so so hard I've read/watched so so many things, I'm just gonna name the first ten freaks that pop into my head, but in no particular rank order and im definitely forgetting people:

bakugou (bnha) bc obviously. my entire blog is like a shrine to him. i don't need to justify this choice tbh he's the absolute best

chimney (911) he is SOOO me coded and he deserves the world and i think he's deeply underappreciated so i shall appreciate him myself. underappreciated comic relief characters my beloved

schmidt from new girl. my boy. my king. THE #1 MASTER OF CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT. i love him so so much

chandler from friends .... extremely self explanatory (also, see chimney. very similar reasons)

kyo (fruits basket) he means a lot to me. i wish him all the best in life although tbh he did canonically win in life so go him

connor walsh (how to get away with murder) i LOVE him. so much. he's so fucked up but i think hes done nothing wrong ever

death the kid (soul eater) LOVE OF MY LIFE. ABSOLUTE ICON

chang (community) maybe its just cause i love ken jeong but i love this little fucked up mentally ill freak. he's so fucking funny

phil dunphy (modern family) - no explanation needed. he's awesome. i love him a lot he gives me faith in family

every other main character in new girl. i love them all so much

honorable mentions: annalise keating (htgawm), ochako uraraka (bnha), bobby nash (911), dwight schrute (the office), and probably many many more amazing characters who i simply am forgetting

i also really fuck with the grandma from fresh off the boat

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #210

In what form of communication did you last use to talk to the person you're currently interested in? Discord.

When was the last time something really cute happened to you? When I was at Girt's house a few days ago, when his mom got home, I called hi to her and she got so excited, exclaiming, "My girl's here!!" and she comes into his bedroom to hug and kiss my head and it was so adorable she's so pure

Has anything happened to you within the past month that's made you really happy? Girt started talking about engagement rings with me (he started it, not me) and was deadass taking notes in his phone lmao. I'm not in a rush or anything, but HIM bringing it up was validating that he genuinely wants to be with me forever. Ever since Jason I still struggle to imagine anyone at all ever wanting to marry me.

What was the last thing you looked up on YouTube? Rammstein albums, lol. I've gone through their entire discography before but I did a massive bulk of it a second time and I found I like even more songs than the first time, and that was already the vast majority of their entire history of songs.

Did the last guy/girl you kissed have any piercings? No, I could never picture him with any and I don't believe he wants any.

Do you actually love your parents? Yes. I would die without a millisecond of thought for my mom. I hold some bitterness and hurt towards my dad, but yes, I still love him.

Where did you get the underwear you are wearing right now? I'm in my pjs, I'm not wearing any. Who in the hell wears undies in their pjs, that entirely ruins the comf. I know for a woman it's not healthy to wear them 24/7, anyway. let yo pussy breathe

Do you feel uncomfortable sharing drinks with other people? The one and only person I'll comfortably share a drink with is Girt, if I can make out with him I can drink after the guy lmao. I'd still very much prefer my own drink, though. It doesn't really matter who you are.

Have you gone through a lot emotionally, or has life been easy thus far? blink blink blink

Last person to make you seriously mad? Our landlord.

Who have you recently made up with after fighting? Nobody.

Funniest name you have ever heard? This is a very mean question, next.

When people ask "how are you?" do you say "good" even if you aren't? No, actually. I might downplay how bad I am, but I don't pretend to be well if I'm not.

Do you wear your hair up or down most often? It's too short to go up, so.

Have you ever eaten tofu and if so, did you enjoy it? I don't believe I have. It doesn't look like something I'd enjoy whatsoever.

Have you worn make-up today? I couldn't even TRY to remember the last time I wore makeup...

Can you hear anything right now? I have "Tattoo" by Rammstein on.

What was the last fruit you ate? It was either pineapple or grapes.

Have you ever watched Parks and Recreation? I watched some with Sara when I visited her once, because it was one of her favorite shows. I thought it was fine, but I didn't have any strong feelings. Television shows normally don't do it for me.

Have you watched a movie this week? No, movies are another thing I don't generally care for much, unless it's a theater experience. I can't remember the last film I watched.

How far away is the closest McDonald’s from your house? Around 5-ish minutes by car, depending on what traffic lights you hit.

Have you ever been to Hawaii? No.

How old is the mattress on your bed? It's rather new. I don't think I've had it even a year yet.

Do you keep magazines by your toilet? No. Bring your phone bro

Do you watch movies with the subtitles on? No, unless it's very quiet or foreign. I generally find subtitles to be distracting.

Are you happy? I'm currently rawdogging my mental illnesses with no medication, no :^)

Do you still talk to the person who hurt you the most? Nope.

What do you wear to bed? Loose pj pants and a tank top.

What are you excited about? This weekend Girt and I are going to Charlotte to meet a couple that are some online/gaming friends of his, and we're gonna do stuff around the city. It's more than a three hour drive and we're going there and back in the same day so it's gonna be a long day, but I'm looking forward to it.

Best summer? I'm supposed to remember this?

What type of foundation do you wear? I don't wear it.

Have you read the Pretty Little Liars series? No, but god my sister Misty was obsessed with that and its show when it was a thing.

Do you actually read privacy policies when signing up for new things? Does literally anyone?????

Can you juggle? No.

Do you like Nerds candy? I love them.

What is your favorite color(s) of eye-makeup? It's all about the black, baby.

Do you have sensitive skin? Yes.

Who in your family would you describe as a “character”? My dad.

What color is your best friend’s hair? Black, although like his dad, he's graying very early so there's a lot of that grizzled in.

Do you think your neighbors have any complaints about living near you? No. We mind our business and our dog doesn't bark much.

Is there something you want to tell someone? Two somebodies. I doubt they'll ever be said, though.

Are you interested in more than one person at the moment? No.

How frequently do you pee at night? Once or twice. A night where I don't get up at least once is basically unheard of.

Is there a stuffed animal you still take places with you? No.

Have you ever done something illegal with a family member? What about with your best friend? Possibly, I don't feel like thinking about this forever.

Would you rather get high or get drunk? High, but only on like, weed. No serious drugs that are truly dangerous if you take a responsible dose. Being drunk doesn't sound pleasant in any way, tbh.

What was the last thing you cooked? I don't cook, I pop shit in the microwave lmao.

Have you ever gotten alcohol poisoning? No, that sounds like hell.

Do you want to see someone at this very moment? Yeah, Girt.

Think of the person who has hurt you the most in the past year, who is it? I saw the woman TWICE and it was my last psychiatrist. She did me so much harm in such a short time.

Do you think two people can last forever? 'Til they die, anyway. I don't pretend to know what's gonna happen once my body's dead.

Last person you talked to on the phone for longer than 5 min? My dad.

Are you a morning person or night person? Morning.

Who was the last person in your bedroom? Mom. Besides me, anyway.

Did you ever lose a best friend? What adult hasn't at some point, honestly?

How many piercings do you have? Six right now. Others that have closed either intentionally but mostly unintentionally due to being hospitalized and piercings having to come out.

What is your middle name? Marie.

Could you handle living with the last boy you texted? That's my dad, and yeah, I'd be fine.

Have you been to the beach this year? No, doubt I will.

Does it take a lot to make you cry? Sure doesn't.

Do you have a favorite classical composer? No.

Would you ever visit a psychic medium? No, they're scam artists.

Do you use a dishwasher or wash dishes by hand? Dishwasher.

Who was the last non-relative woman you spoke to in person? The woman who took my blood today.

What’s a topic you’ve drastically changed your opinion on? I was once a conservative dicklord of a teenager. Now I'm politically left and feel very strongly about these beliefs.

Have you ever had a dream in which you died? Multiple.

Do you use Snapchat? No.

Do you know anyone who’s struggling with addiction? Yes.

Have you/Do you know anyone that grows weed? Not knowingly to me.

Which accents can you emulate pretty well? British and country are about it.

Have you ever been a complete fangirl/fanboy over anything? ...........................................................

What’s the weirdest way you’ve ever heard somebody die of? Oh I dunno.

How many true heartbreaks have you had in your lifetime? One true one, romantically.

Do you have any gay family members? My mom's cousin or something named Tom is gay.

Who was the last person to sleep over at your house? Girt.

Would you ever get a boob job? If I lose all the weight I want, I want to get a breast lift. Obesity does things.

Would you be upset if you caught your boyfriend looking at porn? No. I would only be upset if he tried to hide it from me.

Have you ever been punched? No.

How do you feel about bats? I love bats, I think they're very cute. Especially flying foxes and similar species.

Has your Facebook ever been hacked? No.

Have you ever played laser tag? Yes, it was extremely fun.

Is anyone you’re close to in the hospital right now? No.

Who or what sleeps with you? Roman, my cat. He starts off in my bed, anyway; throughout the night he goes to different spots.

Are you pro-life or pro-choice? Pro-choice as fuck. It's not even a matter of whether the baby is truly "alive" or not to me, if it's in MY fuckin body, my wants and needs come first.

Who was your first kiss with? Jason.

What aren’t you afraid to stand up for? LGBTQ+ rights, for one. I'd die for the right to love and to be true to your own body and however it feels like home.

Do you have any STDs? I don't.

Do you have a favorite NASCAR driver? I couldn't care less about NASCAR.

Who’s your celebrity crush? a stupid german rockstar old enough to be my dad 😭

Have you ever intentionally trolled? Hm, not to my recollection.

What is your favorite type of cat? Oriental shorthairs.

What ancient culture intrigues you the most, if any? Maybe Egyptian.

[danidoesathing]

📚💛🔮 for your ask game?

📚 Is there a fanfic or fanfic writer you recommend?

Lord Huron wise there ain't much out there and they're scattered across tags, but there's definitely a few!

Both under a very bad sign by Blancwene and walk out of the cosmic fog into a new life among the stars! by Biolumenesce are really good surreal VN fics that explore more of the vibes of the album as well as the story (pre-movie).

There's a couple more vibe/song centric ones like At the Edge of the Woods by Wasuremono (a yawning grave fic with an original story) and Immortal by Gheyn (la belle fleur sauvage with a fairytale style/elements).

Roubki's Secret of Life is pretty good too! It's a post-VN fic that takes place right after the events of the movie, that follows Buck (and Johnnie, whose still hanging around as a ghost) as he's more or less forcefully adopted by the World Enders. It's very fun and silly and im in love with it so far.

I'd also very much recommend eosofthedawn/foolofatook001's Strange Tales series. It's the different stories of LH in the format of TMA statements. It's three in as of now, two of which are Dead Man's Hand (One from Johnnie's perspective and the other from Buck's) and one for the Stranger MV with the Not!Them. I'd seriously recommend it whether or not you like TMA, those are really great i adore these.

and while I haven't gotten around to reading it yet, Vide Noir: Consciousness Neutralizer by every_eye_evermore is a crossover fic with the Murderbot Diaries books, which (i think) leans and meshes into the sci-fi elements of both series. I've read aster's writing before and can full recommend his stuff!

💛 What is the most impactful lesson you’ve learned about writing?

do whatever you want forever (seriously just. stop giving a shit. you'll feel so much better)

get weird with it

creating a writing discord server just for yourself is a good way to organize your shit

get a beta (still working on this one myself)

for the love of god if you're stuck and want to write the next sentence/scene/paragraph just skip to that. get that shit down further down the page and worry about connecting it later

🔮 Any advice for writers working through burnout or writer’s block?

oh god im not the person to ask for this. i get stuck all the time but uh. ill default to point 5 again because a lot of the time when i get stuck. if you're got the vibes for one scene you're not at yet just....go and get what you can for that scene down while the coffee is still hot.

Alternatively just. get out of the physical space you're writing in. Go to a cafe or restaurant or park or anywhere with free wifi and try it out there. sometimes the brain has different modes its in, like at school is "School mode" at work its "work mode" and home is usually "Rest mode" so just getting out of the house and somewhere new allows for the brain to slip back into that writing mode easier. There's a cafe near my house and going up there to write has been a huge help for my progress (although its not great for my wallet, but hey its good coffee)

if it's more "i cant write at all" you just gotta....wait it out i guess? go out and do something you like and stop thinking about it. the more you worry about getting back to writing the worse it'll get (for me anyway). you cant force yourself out of a writers block usually, so let it pass in due time. remember you're doing this for fun, so let it be fun!

[yourmomni]

Here with me- Park Jay

A/n: I've had this in my draft forever I hope you enjoy this

Watch the sunrise along the coast as we're both getting old

When I was 13 I found love. I found love that I never knew could feel like this. It was just a normal day as I walked through the park taking in the scenery. The sun was setting with a beautiful orange hue over the sky. I found a bench and sat down enjoying the way people lived their lives. I saw a couple having a picnic and a old married couple walking their dogs. Siblings playing at the playground. Different types of love. "Beautiful isn't it." I jumped looking at the boy sitting beside me. "Sorry didn't mean to scare you I just saw you sitting alone and thought you could use some company." He wore baggy shorts a vans shirt with a baseball cap turned backwards.

I stared at him his lips were bright pink and his eyes shinned like the stars in the sky. It felt like time stopped. Is this love ?

I cant describe what im feeling

I felt like we were looking at eachother for hours but it was nearly 30 seconds

He looked away first blushing and staring at his hands. "I'm Jay I live in those houses across the street we just moved her saturday." " im Y/n" He smiled up at me and I smiled at him

"

I wish I could live through every memory memory again"

"Just one more time before we float off in the wind"

We were now 18 and college was going to start soon and I new it was nothing I could do to change it " why can't you just be happy for me I finally did it I made it to their dream  school my parents are finally going to be proud of me for once why can't you just accept that." He yelled. I threw my bookbag on his bed. " I am happy for you but have you thought about where you want to go not them." He scoffed "Thats not something worth thinking about you know that ." " but just think about it you could go to any school in the world you just- " " Y/n just stop" He blew up. I flinched back. " Just because your parents dont give a fuck about where you go or what you study doesnt mean mine think the same ." He gritted his teeth  pointing a finger at me as he talked. I stood their wide eyed. I snatched my bookbag off of his bed. " You know what fuck you jay." He looked at me in shock. " Fuck you, Fuck your stupid college, fuck this stupid house and fuck what you think about me." The tears feel down my face. He took a step towards me. "Y/n  wait i-." I took a step back from him." No just stay away from me and have fun in college." I ran down the stairs and out the door slamming it on my way out. The tears poured out as I walked to my house I slammed the door and ignored my parents asking what was wrong with me running to my room. I closed my door and layer on my bed. I cried myself to sleep that night.

When graduation finally came around I finally noticed how long I spent with Jay. Almost half my life. When the ceremony was over I gave my dad and mom a huge hug as they both handed me bouquet of flowers. After taking a few pictures we went home and chilled the rest of the day until their was a knock on my door. My dad kicked my mom's leg so she would get up but she didn't budge. I giggled " don't worry ill get it." I walked to the door and opened it too see no one was there. " huh weird." I began to close the door until I saw a vase full of beautiful flowers. I tilted my head in confusion and leaned down to inspect the beautiful bouquet I found a note hiding behind a yellow rose "congratulations Y/n we did it we graduated I'm sorry about everything i said to you that day if i could take it back i would I'll be leaving today after graduation so you'll probably never see me again. But you'll be happy to know I took your advice life is too short to live other people's lives so I'm gonna live my own. Anyways I hope you never forget me because I will never forget you .

Love, Jay

Oh P.S. doesnt the sky look beautiful

I looked up and saw the orange hues like I saw they day I met him. I bought the flowers inside and put my shoes on " I'll be back dont start the next movie without me." " y/n-" I ran out my door and down the street to his house. No cars were in the driveway.  Hopefully I'm not to late. I ran up the stairs and knocked on the door. "JAY" I banged on the door. " Park Jongseong." I yelled. I backed up from the door and went to where his window was on the second floor. I picked up pebbles and began throwing them at his window. " Jay please." I fell to my knees  in exhation. I whipped my tears. " I never got to tell you how proud I was of you." "You can tell me now." I jumped at the voice and I saw Jay leaning beside me. I looked at him and it brought me back to that day. The day I met him.

He sat down and started pulling at the grass. Something he does when he's nervous. " your probably still upset with me but I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am and-." I threw my arms around him. He hugged me back immediately. I pulled away and looked at him as he looked at me I glanced down at his lips and he did the same for me. He leaned it and so did I our lips connected. He deepend our kiss and wrapped his arms around me tighter I pulled away we both were out of breath. " I love you I've always loved you." He rambled looking throught my eyes. I smiled " and I've loved you since they day I met you."

"Save your tears,it'll be okay all I know is you're here with me."

[courtzlou07]

My girl

Jj being protective of reader

being the younger sister of John b Routledge wasn't easy, for example he has a set of rules. even tho I'm only a year younger he treats me like I'm 5. his rules 'are to keep me safe' well at least that's what he says, his rules are:

1. no going anywhere without telling him or one of the pouges

2.no drinking unless were at a kegger or a party

3.no hanging out with kooks

and 4 no flirting or dating JJ Maybank.

now you may think there'll pretty easy to follow well 1 - 3 are but 4 is the only I struggle with. I mean if your big brother has a life long best friend who is hot as hell with blue eyes, blond hair , rides a motorbike and is the coolest person you know you tell me how easy it would be not to fall in love with him.

its true that I have been in love with JJ since forever but because of John Bs rule I can't do anything about it. not like I would anyway because there no way he feels the same.

so because of that I have decide to try and get over him by dating and so far it hasn't worked, I've realised that most people on this island are rude and don't care about anyone but themselves but that doest stop me from trying. which leads me to tonight I'm going another date John B is at Sarahs house so I decided this would be the best time to sneak out with jb knowing.

I got ready for dinner with Zac he's a toron here for 2 months he's nice not bad looking and he isn't super rich like kooks but that doesn't matter just means he's not snobby, I put on my little black dress which I know is JJs favourite but its not about him, I put a bit of make up on do my hair in lose curls put on my heels and I'm out the door.

I walk to the wreak which is were one of my best friends Kiara works but I know for a fact that she's not working tonight or else I wouldn't of chose the wreak.

I sit waiting for Zac, he gets there 5 minutes late but he looks very fancy in a white buttoned up shirt and blue jeans with his brown hair slicked back.

"hey y/n" he kissed my cheek and sat down

"hey Zac, how are you?" 

"I'm great what about you ?" I answered good and we started to get ready to order. it was going really well other than he was very touchy he kept touching my hand or brushing his hand over my thigh but I didn't think to much of it so we continued with dinner.

"so y/n how about after desert we go back to my place?" he grabbed my hand from under the table and brang it to his mouth and kissed it.now he was making me very uncomfortable so I excused myself to the bathroom.

I really wanted to go home Zac was freaking me out he wasn't like this the first few times we hung out and I didn't want to walk home alone and I couldn't call John B so I had to call the only other person i could think of , JJ.

"please pick up , please " the phone rang a few times before he picked up 

"hello, JJ "

"hey y/n are you ok?" I explained to him what was going on with Zac all the touching and the invite back to his.

"ok wait there ill be there in 2 minutes" he hung up and say in the bathroom for a minute and thought I should go and get my things from the table. I walked out and could see JJ parking his bike I walked towards the table picked up my bag and began to walk out when I felt a Han grab my wrist really hard.

"where do you think you're going where not done with our date yet" he held on tighter and trie to pull me closer when I felt and arm around my waist and and Zac's let go of my wrist and I automatically knew it was JJ.

"ever and I mean ever touch her again and I will personal send you to hell" JJ pulled me behind him and looked at Zac like he would kill him if he even moved, honestly it was really hot.

"alright man she's all yours " with that he walked back to the table

“Are you ok ?” His eyes raked over my body

" y-yeah I'm fine thanks" he grabbed my hand and led me to his bike and gave me a helmet, I put it on and got on the bike behind him;. it wasn't a far drive back t6o my place and normally jj would be staying there but his dad has been put back in jail so he is at his own house. 

I held on to him as tight as I could holding on to his tank top, he reached behind me and put his hand on my lower back making a warm feeling go throughout my body. I put my hands under his shirt on his abs and layed my head on his shoulder I felt him tense up at my actions but I didn't care I just loved the feeling of being close to him, you could feel the tension between us by the time we stoped all I wanted to do was kiss him. 

I looked up and opened my eyes to see JJs chateau not my own.

"JJ this isn't my house" I looked at him in confusion not that he could see my eyes because of the helmet, he walked towards me and reached for the helmet and took it off my head and through it across the yard

"you can't touch me like that and then expect me to just drop you home, can you ?" he cupped my jaw with his hands his rings cold on my skin, I felt like my skin was on fire as he leans closer to me.

"y/n I have loved you for all my life but because of John Bs stupid rule I couldn't do anything about it but seeing you with that douche bag tonight made me realise I don't give a shit what John B or anyone else says, I love you and I hope you love me to" he looked deep into my eye and I was almost in tears I tired to speak but no words would come out so I did the only thing I could think of.

I pulled him by his shirt and kissed him as I hard as I could never wanting the feeling of his lips on mine to end. 

I pull away even though I don't want to "I love you JJ I always have and always will" I watched the smile grow on his face, he pulls me in by my waist and kiss me gently.

"i'm so happy I really thought you were gonna say 'sorry I don't feel the same' and leave me here like an idiot" JJ says with relief while hugging me with a look of satisfaction on his face.

"seems like you're stuck with me for a while now huh?" I smile up at him kiss him quickly 

" I guess so " he kisses he again then leads me inside of his chateau.

[queen-beefcake-sqx]

I just realized someone already said 69 :(

So in that case I say 42(0)

42 "Leave Out All the Rest" by Linkin Park

GOD I LOVE LINKIN PARK AND THIS SONG HOLDS A SPECIAL PLACE IN MY HEART I was such a fucking edgy emo kid who went through a whole string of break ups with close friends and I wound up listening to this song a lot and thinking about how ~*terrible*~ my old friends must think of me after what an ~*emotional mess*~ I was. And one if that isn't big fucking Harry Du Bois energy I don't know what is.

But also like on a more real note --

This is a half-formed thought, but there's a whole thing going on in Disco Elysium about legacies. Histories. The things people have done that have left a lasting impact on the world around us, both on a global and local scale. I've already talked extensively about my thoughts about Harry's memory loss and how it allows him to have a positive relationship with Kim specifically BECAUSE the Harry Kim meets has no concept of history! Harry threw away his legacy with his clothes and his car and his gun!

And I think that's partially because Harry was so fucking ashamed of himself. Harry was a violent drunk who was doing work his ex-girlfriend had convinced him would be good for him and now saw no way out except to attempt suicide. multiple times. in a variety of styles and with various degrees of publicness. the Harry who stumbled into his room in the Whirling-in-Rags that night was one who felt he'd left behind nothing good or glorious or worth staying for.

... And then Harry wakes up again, faced with the wreckage of a life he doesn't remember but one with Very Real Lasting Consequences none the less. And Harry has the face the reality that the person he was before the Kineema woke him was Not A Great Person At All(tm). hurting and desperate, sure. desperately in need of care no one could give him, absolutely. but he also abused his power and, if we believe Jean's vitriol toward Harry had some kernel of truth, didn't fully take advantage of the people trying to offer him help. (Which like, regardless how deserving or not Harry was of Jean's whole Deal(tm) at the fishing village, it is... really, really hard to care for someone mentally ill. Which isn't saying don't do it, but you need to know when to step away. And I think part of Jean being Like That(tm) is Jean not knowing his boundary, and Harry not knowing his boundary which is JUST as necessary, and Jean burning himself out trying to help Harry then resenting Harry for not getting better despite all the work Jean was doing. I've seen this EXACT situation happen and it's 100% how they read to me, and it would explain why that "I want to get worse" comment was so CUTTING to Jean.)

Anyway my point is that Harry wants to leave behind those things that were terrible about him. Intentionally or not, he's gotten a chance to reinvent himself, and he does! He grabs onto whatever thoughts catch his fancy and discards the ones he dislikes, the ones that poke too close at something vulnerable and painful. He can tell whatever outright lies he wants to and the most people can do is call bullshit and move on, because god knows Harry doesn't know the truth half the time! And if you play with Harry wanting to be a Good Person in Some Sense(tm), I think by the end of Martinaise he really wants to prove he can do something good. Maybe it's "good at his job", or "good for the people", or "good for Kim, who truly trusts him", or whatever. But Harry wants to be more than the ghosts that lead him here.

...I don't know!!! I don't know!!!! I could probably sit here and talk forever about memory and history and the Grand Reinvention of Harry Du Bois but just think of how Harry must have felt bleeding out on the ground of the Tribunal and thinking the last several days are going to be all that's left of him --

[autocann1bal]

part four of my playlist analysis!!

part 1 &lt;- part 2 &lt;- part 3 <- back into the soup we dive

somewhere only we know - keane lockwood takes them to a special spot and they have a nice picnic on a hill and cuddle on a picnic blanket <3 we're ignoring how sad the song actually is <33.

brooklyn baby - lana del rey oh please lockwood is so brooklyn baby by lana del rey you cant tell me hes not hes a posh little london boy and lucy's a girl who grew up in a rural town in the north theyre so brooklyn baby.

sunsetz - cigarettes after sex we're ignoring the sexual aspect of this song entirely <3 anyway theyre wandering around a park just before the sunset, just being silly and cute <333. like real people do - hozier look i know we've had plenty of locklyle sleepy morning and sleepy nights but this one is DIFFERENT OK. they wake up in lockwoods bed after a rough night of panic attacks from both of them, they fell asleep in eachothers arms. lucy tries to get up without disturbing him and he, still asleep, holds her tighter and kisses her forehead. she stays till he wakes up and they kiss <333 domesticity my beloved. its called: freefall - rainbow kitten surprise george and lucy talking methinks. it just feels like a serious conversation between them. my kind of woman - mac demarco lockwood just heart-eyes-ing at lucy while she files papers in the basement or smth idk just lockwood pathetic simp mode, as usual <33. i was all over her - salvia palth lmao lockwood hopeless simp time but sad edition. the way he looks at her, like shes all hes ever wanted, all he ever will want, but the knowledge that she may never be his. this gets even worse after she starts helping him with his panic attacks, he feels like hes using her. francis forever - mitski lockwood, alone in his room, every night after lucy left. he cant get her out of his head and hes to afraid to ask george for help, for fear george will tell him to suck it up and move on (which of course would never happen). those where some rough nights for lockwood. the beer - kimya dawson lucy breakdown song (real) (not clickbait) (im definitely not writing this instead of my essay waht are you talking about) i want you - mitski lucy, longing for lockwood more than anything, but shes so deathly afraid that holly is replacing her. diet mountain dew - lana del rey ok it doesnt. really fit their dynamic i dont think but it just sounds so right ykwim? good looking - suki waterhouse hes her good looking boy!!! this song is so them just read the lyrics <33. 4 morant - doja cat erm. uhm. haha. i mean. yea. erm. so. hee hee. lockwood vibes. harness your hopes - b-side - pavement that whole 'hold me just like the morning paper' line is so simp-y lockwood <3333. dirty night clowns - chris garneau different. vibe from the last song uhhh. do i have to explain. move me - half.alive THEY ARE SO HALF.ALIVE I CANT EXPLAIN IT ITS JUST THEM. i mean the literal first line of this song is 'i never told, you never asked' which is quite literally them in episode 6 so. i wanna be yours - arctic monkeys just lockwood being a simp again and who can blame him lucy is so <333. britrock - mccafferty uh oh more mccafferty time. this song is just so lucy i dont know why it just is im sorry. im not sorry. after dark - mr. kitty sad vibes. theyre both in the dark just lying together in lockwoods bed. not even talking just together. thinking. ill call you mine - girl in red do i have a personal vendetta against this song?? yes. will it stop me from using it for Them TM?? absolutely not. cute domestic roadtrip vibes fight me. i want to be with you - chloe moriondo this one is self explanatory. bedroom ghost - flower face oops different vibe. lucy shower breakdown? no, lockwood shower breakdown :sunglasses:. privately owned spiral galaxy - crywank (specifically the lovejoy cover tho) mmm lockwood thinking alone in his room song methinks. christ alright, part 5 ig im so sorry this is so long i feel so bad dfhgfkjg

[a-complex-joke]

Manifestation and Rebounding

Chapter 3

MASTERLIST

Brian POV

We had been chatting a ton since that night.

I was able to move back to my apartment which was nice since Sam's couch was starting to give me scoliosis.

I did tell him about the event. He was really chill about it.

“Good for her, just don't let her fall in love with you while you're just in it for a friend,” he said letting me like some overly protective dad. 

We agreed to meet at a local park and walk over to Harris’s diner.

When I pulled up I could see Emily standing next to a bench.

She had worn a casual outfit. Jeans, a t-shirt, and A sweater with strawberries, her rustly hair in a messy high ponytail.

“Ahh there you are, I was starting to think you’d died or something” she joked as I walked up to her.

“And here I thought I was overdressed,” she said looking me up and down, refusing to look at my face.

“I thought my outfit was pretty casual” I pouted.

“Don’t get me wrong it’s nice, you just seem more ready for a tv interview and not a hang sesh”

She started walking away waving me to follow.

We soon fell into silence walking beside each other, occasionally having to squish together to avoid the opposite side foot traffic.

Causing the invisible tension to grow bigger.

“So… you go to Harris’s much?” I attempted to make small talk

“Yeah, their food is pretty good but they have a chill aesthetic too.”

“Oh and why’s that?”

“You’ll see… so how long have you lived in town?”

“About six years, I was really busy my first year and by the next, I was dating Clara, My ex. She lived here way longer, and only liked to go to certain places so I never got the chance to explore”

Private school and having a full-time job at 15 didn’t help, not that Dad would care if I only did part-time.

“Im kinda the same way, I have my favorite stores that I like, and I've probably not been in most of these places, half of them are bars anyway, but sometimes you got to just figure out what a store is before you judge” she looked over to me as if searching for my reaction. “Now that I say it out loud it sounds pretty stupid huh” she nervously chuckled.

“No, it makes sense” Back to awkward silence

I eventually made it to the diner, and we both seemed to let out a sigh of relief.

“Welcome to Harris’s diner, im Betty ill be your happy helper today, can I start you two off with some drinks”

“They sure are cheery here” I commented

“Nah that's just Betty, made of rainbow kittens and glitter” Emily retorted

“Did you just come up with that, or just save it for a time like this” I laughed

“Yeah just said the first thing that came to my mind,” she said looking to her feet and blushing.

“And here are those drinks for you guys. Em im assuming you’ll have your usual chicken plate, but what can I get you pretty boy” Betty said setting down our drinks.

Emily nodded to Betty.

“Oh, I'll take the umm, Crow's burger” I answer quickly.

“Coming up butter cups”

“This is, so awkward. Like over text we can just talk and talk but, right here and now I feel im at a loss for words” she said staring out the window we were sitting by.

“Same here, I mean it’s been forever since I've been on a first date, I mean if that's even what this is, I have no idea what to do or say,” I said feeling my face grow warm.

“Ok so like don’t think im weird for this but, I bought this card game I bought a while back on a Wim. pretty much you and another person each get a set of cards, there are doubles for every card but for the opposite deck, you take turns asking the other the questions on the card. You can pass on any card as much as you want but the goal is to answer the most questions” 

“An ice breaker, what do we really have to lose, hand me those cards!” I said tring to break the tension.

“Ok first question for the nice lady, what is the last big mistake you made?”

“Oh, I left my Painters tape lying out and my dog tore it apart, it was a new roll” she answered. “Ok, what's something you did more of when you were younger?”

“That's a hard one, i guess explore different hobbies and such”

“Oh trust me when you’re friends with me, you are practically my unpaid volunteer in art” she joked

“Alright were on a roll, net question. When did you…  have your first kiss? You know what you can skip this if you want”

“No, it’s fine. I haven’t, im the 19-year-old super virgin, barely held hands with anyone” She dryly laughed.

Awkward.

“Did you regret your first love?” she read off the card

“No and yes, he made me realize a lot of things about myself, but the way he treated me made me regret it”

“What would you say your relationship with your parents is like? Ok, these questions are getting weird” I said raising an eyebrow.

“I think they are narcissistic and I've known for years that as soon as I could get away I would never come back. im still working on saving up enough money to move out with my friend” she gave flat smile.

“Do you want to quit the game, I guess it was kind of weird to bring” She looked away, shameful

“No, it was actually a great way to ask each other things, but maybe we should stop. It looks like our food is coming out,” I said, placing my hand on hers.

She looked up at me, “y-yeah”

The rest of the time in the diner was a lot less awkward, There were some moments of prolonged silence but otherwise, it seemed to go well

[heteroeroticsubtext]

It is tiny and sweet and adorable. It looked healthy and well fed with soft, shiny fur and lots of energy for chasing leaves after it had warmed up a bit in my arms, so it almost certainly has a family. It walked with me most of the way home but stopped at a ground floor apartment where it probably lives

We probably shouldn't get a cat because we live in an apartment and don't have very much money and also have birds, but we have wanted one for a very long time, and we have a room we could move the birds to, so they wouldn't have contact.

I'm lying awake in bed thinking about this cat with tears in my eyes, and my heart physically hurts because I miss it so so much

[domjaehyun]

question! but u don’t have to answer if u think it gives away personal information about urself!! i was just scrolling through ur asks and noticed that u mentioned u don’t read books, so i was wondering how u got into writing/get writing inspiration from (if u do get inspo)? like did u take some sort of creative writing in school, is it like part of ur job orrrrr

just curious bc i’m a stem girlie and i love writing but i have to read a lot and heavily depend on books/fics as a guide bc i have no actual knowledge taught to me :p

ooooh well i USED to read a lot i was a reading girlie when i was younger like up til middle school i must have read like . hundreds of books i used to work at a park once and i had a lot of free time so i would just . read and im like . very fast? like i was def faster when i was younger so i could go through like 2 maybe 3 books a day at that job! i would say i still read but now its mostly fanfics? like nothing published idt even my wish list on amazon is full of writing books like . on craft and style and structure like that !!

apparently i told an evaluator when i was younger that i once read a dictionary for fun ….well i recall that vaguely but i also recall not finishing SNDJSKDKSM i think i started skimming for words that caught my interest and then read definitions for them!!!

i got into writing at that age like (well tbh i wrote my first story when i was 5? or 6 i think but it was like . 2 pages at most i think) i would just . make my own stories and i allllllwayyyyys daydream i’ve daydreamed forever i think !! but lately a lot of my inspiration comes from music like ill hear songs and just . start daydreaming and stuff or like a line of dialogue will inspire me or smth like that!! but the main answer is music!! i listen to music literally all the time i listen at work (i am not supposed to…but i do anyway) i listen while im getting ready, i listen in my downtime; you name a time and place and i bet im listening to music then or if you come up to me randomly in public i def have an airpod in KSDKKDKSK

but i’d also say if you want to get back into reading, poetry is a great way to start!! short form poetry is (when done well/properly) like raw and can evoke emotion with so few words that it amazes me 🥹 i actually almost majored in creative poetry in college tbh like i love poetry and that’s all my attention span likes to read now if i Do decide to read smth !!

but there’s absolutely nothing wrong w having to rely on books/fics!!! reading is what makes people better writers imo bc they get to experience diff styles of writing, open their eyes to new vocab, and they get an idea of how a story should be set up!! it’s like training for a sport before you start playing it!!!