#anyways if anyones wants to discuss send me ask or DM me

[jokeroutsubs]

[ENG sub/translation] Bojan Cvjetićanin: "Slovenia is too small for Tinder" (podcast)

Bojan Cvjetićanin on Cosmopolitan podcast, originally published on the 15th of September 2020 here. Podcast host: Anamarija Lukovec. Translation by @varianestoroff, native English proofreading by TWT @/klámstrákur.

This is an audio-only podcast, but you can listen and read the subtitles along with it here:

or you can read the full transcript in this post!

Teaser:

Bojan: I don't want to be available... available with a click. I want to be available in that if I am sitting in a bar, anyone can come up to me, that any girl can come up to me and ask me, I don't know, “Would you like to have a drink with me?”, “Can I have your number?”, whatever. Which doesn't happen anymore anyway, but...

Full transcript under the cut!

Host: Hi, believe it or not, the Cosmo Podcast is back. And it's back for a new, changed second season. Some things will stay the same, some things will change a little. And the very first thing that remains the same is that ... it remains the same that I will still be in front of the microphone. My name is Anamarija Lukovec and I'm the executive editor of Cosmopolitan.

In fact, I was thinking that we don't even know each other. We don't even know each other, actually. Even if you've heard all the episodes from last season, you probably don't know anything about me. I don't know anything about you. So I will introduce myself with one piece of information, which has somehow defined the new season. I notice in myself that I have many opinions that are not widely held. And also that, [while we] as a society are promoting ourselves as increasingly open-minded, free-thinking, accepting, we often act very hypocritically and are even Hostile to opinions that are not in line with ours, or with some opinions that are accepted by the majority.

So I want every guest of mine who comes to the new season of the podcast to present their unpopular opinion as a starting point for our discussion. To break taboos, to talk about things that may often go unheard to educate ourselves, and perhaps to anger or soothe our souls. Okay. Yes, and I'd really like to get to know you too, I'd like to know who you are, who's basically a Cosmo Podcast listener, so I'm inviting you, to send me your ideas, your secrets, your compliments, your complaints. Or you can just write, "Hi". I suggest Instagram for that. You can DM me at lunaticpoetry. It's L-U-N-A-T-I-C-P-O-E-T-R-Y. And yes, I don't use my real name, more on that another time.

So yeah, if you're up for it, we can get started and kick off a new season of the podcast. My first guest, yes, it's a male guest, not a female guest, I can't believe it, a round of applause... he's a musician, singer, frontman of the band Joker Out, Bojan Cvjetićanin. I'm sure you know him. I am sure you have a very good reason for knowing him. Bojan came to talk to me about relationships, dating, girls...

Before that, before we did the podcast, he also made a video. We invited him for a blind date in front of the camera because Bojan is single, wink wink. So yeah, I invite you, after you're done listening to the podcast, to click over to youtube.com/cosmopolitanslovenija where you can watch the blind date with Bojan¹.

And yes, let's start, right. Hi Bojan.

Bojan: Hi.

Host: How was your first blind date on camera?

Bojan: I was a bit nervous because I hadn't been on any blind dates before, and then the first time it was in front of the camera, oh my gosh. The camera catches everything, you can't hide anything. But I think I did a great job. The girl was great too.

Host: Do you think maybe you two have a future together?

Bojan: I don't know. I don't know. I must take a look at the crystal ball at home.

Host: Ah ok. In fact, our topic for today, your unpopular opinion, is also a little bit about love, dating, and so on. Can you just reveal your thoughts?

Bojan: My unpopular opinion, I don't know how unpopular it really is, but it is that Slovenia is too small for Tinder.

Host: Okay. And why do you think so?

Bojan: I feel that way because it seems to me that we all know someone who knows someone, and in Slovenia, this kind of social network very quickly turns into something where in the end everybody knows everybody and Tinder, at least in my experience, is quite, how should I say... funny, because you very quickly come across people you know.

Host: But maybe Slovenia is too small for dating in general? Because sooner or later you find, meet, date someone who someone you know has dated or been in contact with.

Bojan: I think it is. In fact, it is... We have this concept of dating, which I think is very different from the American one. In America, it's normal to go out with someone a couple of times a week and then, if you like them, you go to another one and maybe something develops. I don't think that exists here. Here, if you like someone a lot, you write to them on Instagram and then, if you're lucky, they say you can go out and two days later everyone knows.

Host: Yes, pretty much.

Bojan: Then you are off the list for all her friends.

Host: You close the door.

Bojan: Yes

Host: Do you think that makes us slower to go public with our relationships?

Bojan: Shoot, I don't know. Maybe we are a bit more secretive about it then, because of that, because we want to keep that certain feeling that the whole city doesn't know exactly who you're with but then all your friends are thinking about whether they know someone who was with your girlfriend or for girls if one of them was with her boyfriend.

Host: But perhaps the biggest problem here is that we are somehow closing our options, when we decide too quickly whether to be with someone

Bojan: To close our options with others?

Host: Yeah, let's say, because you know that if you're with a girl, then you probably won't go out with her friends or acquaintances. Well...

Bojan: In fact, that's probably pretty true, yes. Because I already feel that since we tend to introduce our friends to our online followers, and you're usually with them on stories and in photos, it would be a bit strange if one of your acquaintances dated the same person two months later, when you [and that person] were previously in the same pictures.

Host: And everyone would know. And suddenly you have a soap opera in front of the whole world.

Bojan: Right.

Host: Since you said Tinder is too small for Slovenia, you probably have your own experience with Tinder. You mentioned something earlier when we were filming. Would you tell us a little bit about your encounter with this app?

Bojan: I have a rather funny experience with Tinder. I was very interested to see what it was like. And of course I had to download it. And I made a profile, I put like three photos up and so on. And then I started getting screenshots of my Tinder profile in Instagram messages from some followers, “Oh my god, is that you?”, “Hey, is that you?”, and so I was like, “No, it's not me, no. It's a fake profile. It's a fake profile.” And it felt really awkward so I deleted it immediately.

Host: But why did you feel awkward?

Bojan: I actually made one because I was curious...

Host: In what it is like?

Bojan: In what it is like. This user experience. You actually see people and you just swipe them and there are no consequences. Nothing happens if you swipe someone left or if you swipe someone right. And I found that very interesting. But then I realised, yes, okay, but now it can be public opinion that I need to look for a girlfriend through an online service.

Host: Girlfriend. Or a one night stand.

Bojan: Right.

Host: Do you think public opinion is generally negative towards online dating? Because it seems to me there it is a kind of stigma, or something people are hesitant about when going online to look for love or a partner, because it's, I don't know...

Bojan: I think that this ‘Frendi in Flirt’ (‘Friends and Flirting’)² started when I was little and then the whole story was that these are services for people who are desperate. Both Tinder and these apps have normalised things a lot, I think, because it's virtually at everyone's fingertips. You sign in with that one click to connect with Facebook or you make a password and that's it. It used to be a process of making a profile and a photo and put the age and blah blah blah. And it was a bit more official, I think, when you decided to take that step. Now it's not a step anymore, now it's just, I download it in my room at home and in three minutes I have Tinder. So I don't think there is that much stigma about online dating anymore, I also know a lot of people who are in some kind of relationship through this, so I'd say there's still a bit of that, okay, LOL, you met on Tinder, there is no stigma of being a sad loner, someone desperate.

Host: By going on Tinder, you are basically admitting to the whole world or to all people who will see you there, that you are looking for something. And that's a bit awkward for us to admit. Yes, I am looking for something.

Bojan: Yes, in fact it is. I also... that was one of the reasons I deleted it. I mean, what is there for me to find now, you know?

Host: I'm cool on my own.

Bojan: Yeah, I mean, no, I'm cool on my own, but that, well, not everyone needs to know, that I am now looking for something, and that I am very available. Do you know what the cool thing is? That... I don't want to be available... available with a click. I want to be available in that if I am sitting in a bar, anyone can come up to me, that any girl can come up to me and ask me, I don't know, “Would you like to have a drink with me?”, “Can I have your number?”, whatever. Which doesn't happen anymore anyway, but... I would like to be available like that. But I don't want to be available for someone who can just swipe on me.

Host: Yes, yes, okay. Now, you said that a couple of girls screenshotted your Tinder and then sent it to you on Instagram. Did those same girls, for example, message you directly on Instagram?

Bojan: You mean directly on Tinder?

Host: Yes. No. Yes. Or directly on Instagram. Let's say, okay, on Tinder, if you didn't swipe them, they couldn't get to you...

Bojan: Yeah, probably then they wouldn't be able to.

Host: But then they wrote to you on Instagram, probably in some, I don't know, wishful thinking to get in touch with you. Why do you think they don't go directly to Instagram? Why... Seeing you on Tinder gave them a green light: "Oh, in fact, he is free, I can write to him."

Bojan: Maybe. But I also think it is a much easier way to just communicate something that already exists, than to start a conversation yourself. That's the same as, I don't know, I think most of the time, if we're sliding into someone's DMs, we're sliding through some story first or something you can reply to. It's much easier to reply back to something they've posted, than starting a conversation from scratch, where you let the person know you've come with the purpose that you want to get to know them and initiate a relationship. Like that looks so innocent: I'm just replying to what you posted.

Host: Can you explain to me this game of sliding in the DMs, because I'm a bit out of the loop?

Bojan: Okay. Honestly, I don't know what can I tell you, because I don't practice it at such a level either. I have two ways to slide into the DMs, I think. One is that if I see something on a story that I actually find interesting or funny, I slide into the DMs and I don't really mean to initiate anything else. And I just comment on what went on there, and sometimes a really interesting conversation starts afterwards. But sometimes you really do just reply, because why not?

Host: Okay. You've camouflaged it so well now that no girl will be able to tell exactly what you want the next time you slide.

Bojan: Yes.

Host: Good. But what do you think happened to the actual old school approach towards a girl or towards a guy in person?

Bojan: I mean, it has changed completely, but now, basically, now that I think about it, I wouldn't dare say which way. I definitely think it is much easier if you see someone outside and you like them, wait until you get home and text them on Instagram, "Hey, saw you in town." Or whatever. "Would you like to go for a coffee with me?" Asking someone out for coffee rather than actually approaching them.

On the other hand, it seems to me that since we are all so exposed on these social networks, giving our followers the impression that they are somehow present in our lives, letting them into all kinds of situations, so that I could say that people feel as if they're already your friends somehow, before they even know you. So maybe in a way... basically, I will say, I think it's much easier for people to get to you at parties now, because they feel that they are somehow already connected, or that they already know something about you and can initiate a conversation based on something you do or post and share on your social networks. In the city, when you see someone, it's easier to wait until you get home and then write to them on Instagram.

But the last time I went out for ice cream with a friend, a dude actually came along and he was like, "Hi, can I just grab you for a second?" and I thought that some Jehovah's Witness was going to start selling some books there. And the guy actually came and told my friend that he couldn't resist, because he liked her so much that he just came to ask for her contact, to take her out for a drink and I was like "Wow, what a gentleman."

Host: Plus you were there.

Bojan: I was there. The first thing he asked, he was very polite, the first thing he asked was if we were a couple. I said no, go ahead. And he was, indeed, extremely kind. A very polite guy.

Host: And did she give it to him?

Bojan: Hey, she gave him her Facebook, I think. I don't know if they went out after that, I have no idea. But it was pretty impressive for me, he got respect points from me.

Host: Cool. How do you act if you see one girl somewhere and you like her?

Bojan: I usually try to find out who the girl is as quickly as possible, then sneak into some of the places where she's hanging around, you know?

Host: Aha, oh, but that's...

Bojan: I mean, ok, that sounded a little bit creepy now.

Host: No, no, it's fine.

Bojan: I watched two episodes of that show, 'She'...

Host: ‘She'?

Bojan: Isn't 'She' the series?

Host: ‘You'?

Bojan: ‘You'. That, yes, sorry. Yeah, I've just realised that I've been that dude, very creepy.

Host: They're probably people you have something in common with, you don't just...

Bojan: Yes, I didn't mean like sneaking in, just going out somewhere, but I meant more along the lines of, ok, now I see she's going to Kino Šiška for an event and then I will go there on purpose, even if I wasn't planning to otherwise. For example, you just invite a friend for a beer and watch out for where she is.

Host: How would you describe your love life or the current situation?

Bojan: I am extremely single. I don't know what you call it. Single and ready to mingle.

Host: To mingle.

Bojan: But actually, I don't know, I'm not looking for anything. I'm in a period now in which I'm like, trying to devote myself as much as possible to music and all that. So I try to be as creative as possible and not let any unnecessary thoughts distract me from being creative. But if anything ever happens, I'm always open to socialising.

Host: Since we were just talking about Tinder earlier. Tinder is also often associated with certain modern relationships, which often have some negative connotations. Undefined relationships and indecisiveness. Blablabla. Fuckboys, etc. But do you think this is really a new culture?

Bojan: From what I hear from acquaintances who live in slightly bigger countries, Tinder is actually just there as a means to get to non-committal sex very quickly. In Slovenia... given that I've never actually used it properly, I don't know exactly. But I suppose, knowing people who are in serious relationships, that people here take it a bit more as... actually seeing someone, they might like each other and go out and get to know each other. But there are almost certainly a lot of people who are only there for the sex. I mean...

Host: Which is not necessarily a bad thing.

Bojan: No, I mean, I don't think it's bad at all, really, because if two people are physically attracted to each other and if they are actually safe in their physical relationship, which is to say, approaching the matter safely, I see absolutely no problem with that, honestly.

Host: Do you have any personal objections, like what you wouldn't do in a relationship or romance? Given that so many things are so okay and acceptable nowadays and things are...

Bojan: What do you mean?

Host: I don't know.

Bojan: Be more specific.

Host: Let's say open relationships, cheating...

Bojan: Aha. Okay, I've practically only been in a serious relationship once and when I was in the serious relationship I would never have thought of an open relationship and I never cheated. It honestly seems to me that if two people date in an open relationship and it works for them or rather, it suits them, then I have no problem. But if two people are in a monogamous relationship, cheating is one thing that's very, very wrong to me, I do not support it at all. So, I have nothing against open unions, I would not practice them myself. At least not for now. I have a very negative attitude towards cheating.

Host: Personally, I think Slovenia is totally too small for cheating in general, we don't approve of it.

Bojan: Absolutely.

Host: But how do you think this even works? People still do it.

Bojan: Hey, in fact, people do it full on. I mean, I have a big circle of people around me and I hear many stories and I, personally, with this anxiety that I have inside, I couldn't even manage these master plans and combine multiple hidden lives. I don't know. But some people actually enjoy it very much.

Host: You really have to have a lot of time to do that. It must be a hobby for you.

Bojan: It must be, I guess, a hobby for you, but you must really not feel sorry for your partner. Because you always find out in the end, undoubtedly always. Never...

Host: I think you find out before you even cheat. For example, when we were looking for a girl to go on a blind date with you the other day, a colleague contacted a girl. Before she even heard back from her, that girl's brother told her that he already knew she'd been looking for his sister. So within fifteen minutes it got around. So, let's say, one example of how quickly information gets around Slovenia.

Bojan: Well, here we go. Pretty awkward.

Host: Considering you're a young musician and I kind of feel like you musicians have a reputation for certain qualities when it comes to women and relationships. Would you say that you are the usual, stereotypical womaniser, someone who breaks women's hearts? Because I'm sure someone would believe that you are.

Bojan: Yes, I know that too, they are convinced that I am. I think, that at least here, some Casanova style Mick Jagger rock'n'roll version is impossible, because it's one thing to be in Los Angeles one day and New York the next. I would absolutely not call myself a womaniser. I choose the relationships I have very carefully. But I am very flirtatious. I do very much enjoy flirting, actually, not at all because I would have expected any starting point from this, we know what I mean by that. But just for that, because it's actually a lot of fun to give someone some playful signals and receive them back. I think it's a bit like, it gets your adrenaline flowing a bit, it's not harmful at all, I'm sure it releases hormones of happiness and joy along with it, so I think that it's only healthy and that people should be more flirtatious in general.

Host: How do you make yourself more flirtatious? Let's say, it seems to me that it really depends on someone's nature.

Bojan: It's in our natures, but I think people just need to relax and open up a bit. I think most people have feelings inside them, but they don't dare to express them. I mean, if I like... if I like a girl, I have no problem with that, if we look at each other, catch each other's eyes, I'll smile nicely, I don't know, if it's appropriate at the moment, I don't know, I'll wink. Or something. You know what I mean? Not winking like this, "What's up babygirl?", but in a way that is playfully flirtatious. Whatever. I think people need to realise that these things are not a crime and that someone won't hold a grudge against you if you smile at them beautifully, [or] if you initiate a small conversation, because that is just a small part of our lives and [we are just] creating some bonds, so I think showing emotion is a very important thing.

Host: But what if I linked it to, let's say, cheating? How would you feel if your partner or you flirted with others while you were in a relationship? Would you consider that cheating?

Bojan: I wouldn't consider it cheating, but it would probably bother me, so I'd want to talk about it.

Host: How would you defend your generation, to which perhaps the older generations ascribe many prejudices, looking at the way we... what kind of relationships we have, how we socialise?

Bojan: I think it is very easy for each generation to look at the younger generation and... to look down on the younger generation and judge them, because maybe things were a little different in their time. All these things are very much linked to the whole lifestyle we have. It's not just the way young people are in relationships today, or the kind of life as a couple they have, because it's all connected to our whole lifestyle and living on the internet, travelling the world at every moment and blablabla. I find that very hypocritical of them, given that they are a generation, or okay, maybe they're a bit younger than this generation, but they were nevertheless this certain generation of this free love, psychedelia, who used sex and drugs to push back on the war. So it seems to me that this particular delinquency was far from being invented by us but it dates back to ancient times. So I think for all people, who think that young people today have invented some perversions, open relationships, gayness, and so on should read a book from ancient Greece or Rome and see, that Caligula³ lived all this two thousand years ago.

Host: Just a little less hidden, I guess.

Bojan: Yes, maybe.

Host: Would you be up for a challenge? Since you said you're not a womaniser.

Bojan: Yes.

Host: I have a BuzzFeed test here.

Bojan: BuzzFeed test?

Host: Are you a fuckboy? Do you want to take it?

Bojan: Okay, let's go.

Host: Have you ever sent a "You up?" text? "Are you sleeping?"

Yes, once. I promise.

No, never.

Yeah, that's my go-to move.

Bojan: No. I don't think so, really.

Host: Have you ever cheated on someone?

Bojan: No.

Host: You said it. "Have you ever sent an unwanted picture of your "little friend"?

Bojan: No.

Host: Have you ever sexted more than one person at the same time?

Bojan: Yes.

Host: Have you slept with two people in the same week?

Bojan: No.

Host: Have you ever made up an excuse to leave immediately after sex?

Bojan: I think, yes.

Host: Have you ever convinced someone that you didn't need to use a condom?

Bojan: No.

Host: I would never. Okay. Have you ever posted a picture without your shirt on?

Bojan: Yes, indeed. In fact, I must have been shirtless a couple of times in the stories now, but I posted one shirtless photo two years ago.

Host: Ok.

Bojan: At sea.

Host: Yes, yes. Do you think all of your exes are "crazy bitches"?

Bojan: No.

Host: Have you ever asked a girl to send nudes?

Bojan: Yes.

Host: Have you ever bragged about girls you've been with?

Bojan: Like openly?

Host: Yes.

Bojan: No.

Host: Have you complained about being "friendzoned"?

Bojan: Almost certainly.

Host: Ok. Have you ever sent that emoji of a monkey covering its eyes?

Bojan: No.

Host: Do you have any...

Bojan: What is this monkey's thing?

Host: I don't know, maybe... it's some fuckboy hallmark, I don't know.

Do you have any V-neck tees?

Bojan: Mhm.

Host: Do you wear them?

Bojan: My mum bought them for me, so I guess it's not really fuckboyish.

Host: Yes. Do you have any tattoos that are only visible while wearing a V-neck?

Bojan: No.

Host: Do you have any tattoos?

Bojan: No, I don't.

Host: Have you ever slid into a girl's Twitter DMs?

Bojan: I don't have Twitter.

Host: What about Instagram? We said yes.

Bojan: Yes.

Host: Are you in a band? Yees.

Bojan: Yes.

Host: You see, the hallmark of fuckboys. Are you a DJ?

Bojan: No. I mean, if she wants, I can be a DJ.

Host: Could be: "No, but my friend is this like super poppin' DJ".

Bojan: Yes, it could, it's true.

Host: Oh, it doesn't work.

Bojan: Can't fix it anymore?

Host: No. What are Top-Sider⁴?

Bojan: I don't know.

Host: We'll put... oh, it's some shoes.

Bojan: Then I'm sure not, because I only wear one pair of trainers, and that's these.

Host: I don't think that's it. Have you ever introduced a girl you've been dating as your "friend"?

Bojan: No.

Host: Have you ever randomly texted a girl you booty called more than a year ago?

Bojan: Booty called? Wait, what if I what?

Host: If you've been with a girl then, after a long time, you write her a random message.

Bojan: Almost certainly, yes.

Host: But were you genuinely interested in how her life was going or just a little bit because you saw her on Instagram?

Bojan: I think only because I saw her on Instagram.

Host: Have you ever travelled to Southeast Asia?

Bojan: No.

Host: Have you ever explained craft beer to a woman?

Bojan: Let's say yes, I think, but...

Host: Yes, but she was genuinely interested.

Bojan: Let's put down "She was genuinely interested", yes.

Host: Ok.

Bojan: Because I don't really know what craft beer is myself. But I mean... I think one of them asked me once why I was drinking it, because she found it very disgusting.

Host: Have you ever based an outfit on one of Kanye West's outfits?

Bojan: Oh, no, unfortunately.

Host: Do you own a hoodie that costs more than some people's rent?

Bojan: No. If you add up all the hoodies, they don't cost like a tenth of the rent.

Host: Have you ever ghosted someone?

Bojan: This means...

Host: That you suddenly stopped replying to them. The girls. Did you have a legitimate reason or did your phone die?

Bojan: Sure... yeah I did, but not like that, ghosting is probably for a very long time, no? To disappear completely?

Host: I don't know.

Bojan: Or just that, I don't know. To disappear completely?

Host: You disappear completely.

Bojan: No, this not.

Host: No.

Bojan: Just for a day or so, I took a creative break.

Host: Oh, good. It's not ghosting. Have you ever gone to a party with one girl and left with another?

Bojan: No. I go practically alone to parties almost always.

Host: And then home.

Bojan: Yes.

Host: Have you ever hit on a girlfriend's... one of your girlfriend's friends?

Bojan: No. Maybe after, when she was already... Not when we were together.

Host: Ok. What about one of your close friend's exes?

Bojan: That... no, homeboys, no, no, a homeboy is a true friend, I'd never do that in my life.

Host: Did you ever say you didn't have an STD and you did?

Bojan: God, no.

Host: And... You are probably a decent human being. Here's the proof. Live. Now no one can accuse you of being one... if anyone says anything to you.

Bojan: It's official! I'm not a fuckboy.

Host: Alright, that's it. Now, to finish, we have a couple of other unpopular opinions which I have chosen, and you will comment whether you agree or disagree, if you find it very stupid, or if there is any truth in it. First: people drink gin because it is fashionable.

Bojan: I think some people do enjoy gin. [But] I think it's disgusting, honestly. But I think some people find gin good.

Host: Ok, I agree too, because I find it good myself.

Bojan: Aha, ok.

Host: Star Wars is not really good.

Bojan: I'm not the right one to answer that, because I actually never watched it. I watched the old one a hundred years ago, they were pretty good.

Host: For those times. I mean, I'm not really interested, but maybe I'm...

Bojan: I've honestly never been drawn to Star Wars at all.

Host: Yes, I can understand why someone would think that. Pineapple on pizza?

Bojan: I haven't tried. But it looks and sounds disgusting to me.

Host: I've tried it, but it's not so bad. Although it's true that I ate it in America, where everything else was so bad that it wasn't so disgusting in comparison.

Bojan: Okay, fair. I think, if so many people eat it, it probably doesn't.

Host: Yes. Give it a try.

Bojan: I mean, there must be something to it.

Host: It's a bit sweet. Like in a Chinese restaurant, that sweet and sour...

Bojan: Yeah, I'm not exactly very... yeah, I don't think it would be good for me, but look, maybe, I mean, I'll give it a try sometime. I'll tell you.

Host: Please do. Here. Tinder themed. LinkedIn is a better choice for dating than Tinder.

Bojan: LinkedIn? Isn't that for business?

Host: Yes. Here someone thinks it's a better way to do things.

Bojan: I have no idea. No, I don't think so.

Host: Maybe you can find someone in your...

Bojan: Business. Yes, maybe.

Host: And the Foo Fighters are better than Nirvana.

Bojan: Never in life. They are sick, but not...

Host: They are not better.

Bojan: No.

Host: Ok. Do you have any more shoutouts to say?

Bojan: Shoutout?

Host: What would you like to highlight at the end of the podcast?

Bojan: Well, let people be aware. Maybe now really isn't the time to be very flirtatious and go into close spaces with strangers. Nothing, be healthy, love each other, and be flirtatious but with a mask, and listen to Joker Out.

Host: Smile with your eyes.

Bojan: Yes. Smile with your eyes.

Host: Bye.

Bojan: Bye bye.

¹You can watch the 'Bojan Cvjetićanin Cosmopolitan blind date' video with subtitles in English, as well as in several other languages, on our YouTube channel here.

²'Frendi in Flirt' ('Friends and Flirting') is a Slovenian website dedicated to people looking for dating and adventure who are over 18 years old, who want to meet new people to socialize and chat or find the love of their life.

³Caligula was the third Roman emperor. Known ancient historical sources have handed down an image of Caligula as a despot, emphasising his extravagance, eccentricity and depravity.

⁴Sperry or Sperry Top-Sider is an American boat shoe company.

[obsolescent]

THE WAY I AGREE W YOU !!! also i think you previously mentioned something about leon desiring a softer, thicker partner and !!! imagining leon seeing a woman (bc im a woman and self indulgent) and seeing her hips and thinking about how she has child-bearing hips and he’s soooo down bad. especially older! leon !! bc at that point in his life he’s ready to settle down with someone.

also also also i was gonna say that he like clvlv requires a family too but then i got scared bc of conflicting opinions but im so glad that you feel that way too. i imagine that since leon lost his parents and has lost so so much in his life, he wants to give the world to his kids. he’d be such a good dad. girl dad leon brainrot rnnnnnn

and also !! vkvkv i love your take on leon sooooo much.

YEAH YEAH I think he would just…him loving physical touch and he would just see the indentation of his fingers/his hold on his partner and just. Yeah.

18+ due to discussions of sexual activities!

Me being a they/them with child bearing hips !,?,!/(/$.? Like hiiii Leon (I know he’s got a breeding kink like I just KNOW it)

He wouldn’t be able to even stop those thoughts either, he’d see someone he finds attractive and the thought would just be like oh. Fuck. !,?!/(/$/(!.$:) the thoughts would definitely ramp up as he got older as his need for a family grew!

I know many would say he wouldn’t want to bring a kid into the world knowing what he knows, but he also knows he would protect his family with every fiber of his being and he knows he could do if after all he’s been through, all he’s survived.

He would be a terrific parent and I can see him like. Teaching his daughter how to protect herself when he isn’t around, teaching her fighting techniques and probably even getting her a gun for her 18th birthday or something 😭 once again he knows how fucked up the world is and he won’t always be around, but he also knows that her being a woman also puts her in danger and he’ll be damned if anyone crosses his child!!!

Anyways. Yep. So much brainrot like, I gotta write a story out about him settling down and raising a family and and. &:(,!.(/)/)!:

But okay I love your takes too!!! Like we’re definitely on the same wavelength 😌🤝😌 fjgsjssfshsg I’ve loved your asks and discussing this with you :) if you ever wanna DM just send a message!! Or honestly if you got any requests for any stories I’d love to hear them too!!

[bijouxcarys]

I really didn’t want to have to do this, as the last thing I want to do is get into any kind of drama in the wrestling fandom on Tumblr. But it seems as though there’s a certain narrative going round regarding me and other writers on this app.

No idea where to start with this to be honest, but I want to make it abundantly clear that I am not the anon that’s been sending transphobic/insulting asks to anybody in the fandom. I don’t even know the person who’s been receiving these asks.

I didn’t even know there was shit going on until I suddenly became suspect number 1 last night.

mysticreigns2. acknowledge-reigns.

I have nothing to do with any of the hate that’s being thrown anyone’s way.

These people digging into all my other socials, screenshotting things, crossing boundaries etc is not something I had on my bingo card for 2024, but here we are.

With that being said, I’m going to have to address posts that people are now seeing I’ve made.

It’s unfortunate that these people have taken my posts about transgenderism and used it as evidence of me sending anon hate. And I hate that I have to explain myself and my opinions for this stupid situation.

Yes, I made a post about a popular/highly discussed situation. And yes, I shared a meme that indirectly rejects GAC for children. And I have my own reasons for believing these two things, but I don’t go out of my way to terrorise anyone over it.

Those two opinions are not indicative of me sending hate to people online. I don’t think someone is a bad person based on their identity, I don’t care what someone chooses to do with their own lives, as long as they’re not harming anyone else. I’m not anti-trans, anti this or that, because I don’t care enough to put that energy into it.

Regarding my supposed “racism”… I made a post a while back talking about how people—people, not poc exclusive—on certain areas of the internet instantly judge the quality of one’s writing based on the colour of their skin. The post was not even extreme, and one read of it will show a whole different picture to the one that’s being painted.

And the post about “gay tumblr” was a fucking inside joke and a reference to something going on at the time in an entirely different fandom that has nothing to do with you, so idk what to tell you there.

I’m not racist. I’m not transphobic. I’m not homophobic (literally gay as fuck). I have never sent hate to ANYONE on Tumblr in all the years I’ve been on here. And I absolutely am a safe person to talk to.

Anyone who’s actually had a conversation with me knows that.

Usually I would let things like this lie and move on, but I’m not about to be accused of something quite serious that I didn’t do. Last night was the first I even heard of someone receiving hate via anon asks. I didn’t know any of this shit was going on and now suddenly I’m the one that’s been doing it all?

Very confused at the situation. Nothing I can do to prove it wasn’t me. And if there is anything I can do to prove it wasn’t me, I’ll fucking do it. Because this fandom is one of the only things I have right now that gives me a sense of being apart of something, and I don’t for a second want people to start thinking I had anything to do with this.

Anyway… I don’t know what else to say. And if anyone wants to talk to me about all this, my DMs are always open.

Love you all 💕

[thelien-art]

I don’t know if anyone has said this yet, so I will. Yes, this is about nolofinwe week.

I’m also not stoked about this whole AI thing, trust me, I ain’t paying money to have bots produce jumbled nonsense. Not now at least. In the future, if things get regulated and there’s some responsibility from companies, I might, I see how it could be useful. I’ve been in the art industry and organizations for longer than some of you are alive, so I get the concern. 

Which is why I was following this discussion on AI and the event closely. I thought it was very sensible from the mods to ask for honesty from the start (if you use AI, that’s on you, but state it so people can block it and ignore you). AI art in this fandom luckily gets little traction, people don’t engage with it, so that is message enough in my eyes. I’ve also worked in schools for years and can tell you that when you tell people NOT to do something, they fixate on doing the exact opposite. So I was like, ok, the mods here are asking for honesty and they trust people not to be dumb, that’s a way better message. No one is telling anyone else what to do or not to do.

Then people started criticizing, and I was actually positively surprised that the mods were willing to take in the feedback and revise things a bit. It’s so rare to see people on the internet these days listening, let alone doing something about it. But that wasn’t enough for y'all. You kept bitching against the event and shutting down the few people who actually took the time to read.

You wanna ban unfair use of AI? Cuz trust, it's here to stay.

Write to your representative, boycott for-profit companies until they take responsibility, support the companies who do it well, vote, donate to civil society organizations if you can, call for educating students, educate yourself.

Don’t scream on the internet at the few people who actually give a damn. I hope the lot of you are proud of yourselves now. Yes, that’s sarcasm.

First of all, I just came home from a Halloween feast so I´m pretty tired and I´ll try to cut it short, also I think I´m very clear about not being from America.

SO! I have been pointing out the problems only this year when others spoke out and they didn't really do anything about it, ONLY THEN, and publicly, about two to three times? I can´t remember. But that was on my main so why are you not sending this to my main as I haven't said anything here?

I have never told people not to take part in it, actually, I was hoping to take part in it next year, so I greatly hope they open it next year. The reason why I wouldn´t this year, was 1. because I don´t have anything for it, 2. they still had it permitted in the start, but now that it is banned I don´t see why I won't want to participate.

Nolofinweweek DMed me, opening a discussion and I tried to explain why some people were angry about them permitting AI, we had some back and forth about the topic, sharing our own sides, them why they had it permitted, and me why I thought it was problematic, and that was pretty much it. - I want to point out that none of us are English native speakers, and I actually learned how to use a word from our talk :)

Are the MOD sharing our DMs? I am willing to share them if that is what you want. This ask just makes it sound like it´s been shared, and I really have nothing to hide so I don´t see why not. Anyway, ask if you want to see them, and I will reach out to them and ask if it´s okay for them to share as it´s their message too.

PS: I think you should take your own advice to heart, and educate yourself more on the harm of AI if that is your hold on it

[routeonebug]

Hello hello hi！！！ My name is Beau､ and I‵m a new high schooler at BBA！！ I come from Kanto､ specifically the Sevii Islands､ and I‵ve probably got family everrrryywhere．

Anyways！ I‵m also a bug type specialist､ but all images are spoilered！ (⟵ 🎱ic) Grampa and big big brother said this was a good academy so I‵m very excited！！

Here､ look at my team！！ + My pets！！

I just got Ribbon､ and Aphrodite is also a new addition！！ Feel free to ask about my Pokémon､ I love them so much :､)

I hope to see people around because I know people will see me！！ Heheheh

-🌻

about the mun/mod!

my name is adon! you could refer to me as adonciant or guy either! i go by he/him only- if you want to use any neopronouns, feel free. i am a minor! my main is @adonciant, which is where likes and follows will come from. of course, all my rp blogs are also listed in my pinned on main!

when a post is signed off with ~🎱, that means its me speaking. it will always be paired with ooc post

─ⵌ call me adon, he/him, a minor! main is @adonciant! ~🎱 is muns signoff

interaction!

pelipper mail/unmail/malice: allowed!

musharna mail/malice: allowed!

mystery gifts: allowed!

magic anon: allowed!

union circle: allowed!

in-character anon hate: allowed!

ooc/questions: allowed!

anyone is allowed to interact with my blogs! fallers, eeby deebys, hybrids, sapients, self-inserts, ocs, in-game characters and more alike are all very welcomed!

non-rp accounts (excluding muns) please do not reblog pokemon irl exclusive posts, or comment under any of them. additionally, if you use an rp blog that isn't pokemon irl, i will not respond to you.

if you ever want to start a roleplay, it's best to discuss it with me first within the blogs dms, unless i already allowed an offscreen post.

note: if i dont get around to an ask, never take it personally! i will always read any asks i get, but i just may not respond if i dont find it necessary, or if i am too tired. i try my best to keep all my blogs active!

─ⵌ all interaction from all blogs are allowed, unless you are non-pkmn irl. discuss offscreen roleplays with me beforehand. i may not be able to get around to your ask, but don't take it personally!

boundaries/notices

─the mod is a minor, and the character is 14! both suggestive and nsfw asks are not allowed no matter what.

─if you ever want to establish a connection between our characters, or want to plan events with yours involved, i'm always open to it! just dm me on either discord [username is adonciant] or on tumblr itself. i will be more than willing to hear your ideas and see what we can do!

─often times, i will do long threads of interaction. i like to reblog back and interact, but if you ever want me to stop without a sign in the roleplay tags for it to end, please tell me! besides this, my threads do not get tagged with anything.

─there are few content warnings to this blog. to roughly list, family loss, pokemon death, and bug body horror. this list is always subject to change, so stay aware. any triggering topics are tagged with associated tags (tw 'topic')

─ⵌ no suggestive asks or nsfw is allowed at all, always try to contact me if you want to establish connections or events, and heed the warnings! [you will need to read over the warnings.]

extra notes

once again､ this is a character i actually like！ so ill talk about her a little bit so people know who she is exactly :)

beau comes from a well known family— as in､ her grandfather is samson oak！ with her way older brother— blue, who continues to travel around the world for different regions— and her other brother､ arven､ whose moved to paldea with their mother sada､ beau has been left in the sevii islands with her bug pokemon！

while her alolan pokemon were gifted from oak as eggs､ kleavor and slither wing were both gifted from sada！ she enjoys writing to her brother and her ‵mother‵ about the gifted pokemon while they continue to live in paldea！ often､ she will also send letters to her aunt sonia！

her life is as easy as it sounds— shes optimistic and often uplifting． theres been no bad in her life､ and theres no reason to start now！ right？

modern pokemon theme VVV

[trans-axolotl]

for anon asking about NPD/ASPD resources

For context, anon sent in an ask searching for nonstigmatizing resources for support with PD diagnoses and other stigmatized diagnoses.

And this is such a good ask--it is so fucking frustrating and dehumanizing to try to search for support when half the stuff that pops up is using really cruel language or just directed towards family and friends. The community definitely deserves better, both when it comes to the way psych professionals perpetuate stigma and in regards to the prejudice and sanism that shows up in other communities in our lives. Unfortunately, I don't have a ton of resources on hand, although I do know one good support group. The rest of the resources I know of are kind of mediocre or not PD specific, so if other people could add on I would really, really appreciate it!

Neuromancers runs a discord and a Cluster B peer support group that I've heard really good things about. I haven't been myself, so I can't 100 % vouch, but they're a group with abolitionist and mad pride values.

This might not be exactly what you're looking for, but it's an article exploring cultural bias in PD diagnosis that links to a lot of sources that talk about how psychiatry contributes to stigma around personality disorders. I clicked through some of the studies that it links to and it does use a lot of medicalized language, but I thought I would link the article anyway in case it's ever helpful to have academic sources to show to other people.

Also not exactly what you're looking for, but another article debunking some of the common talking points about NPD in pop psychology (Content warning that it is discussing some very ableist myths in the context of challenging them)

Last sort of general resources for peer support that I have some trust that they are PD friendly are the Wildflower Alliance and Hearing Voices Network Groups. Wildflower alliance groups offer a lot of different general peer support and I have one friend with NPD who has spoken positively of those spaces. Hearing Voices Network groups can vary a lot depending on location, so defintely plan to email ahead, but I've been to a few groups that welcome people who generally identify as psych survivors/mad/ex patients who want to share community spaces around those values. Also want to share is the neurodivergent friendly workbook of DBT skills (the link is to buy it directly from the creator but if anyone who is interested can't afford it rn, dm me and I'll send you a pdf.) Again, I know this is really not super relevant to what you asked for but is one of the less stigmatizing, less medicalizing workbooks I can find for accessing info about coping skills and this is one of my general favorite support resources.

Overall I'm really sorry that I don't have better resources to offer you, and I think that really should be a sign to the mad pride/psych abolition/peer support community that we need to do a lot better job in making sure that our spaces are explicitly welcome to people with stigmatized PD diagnoses. The work shouldn't have to be on you to try to navigate these spaces and figure out whether or not you're welcome, and any spaces that offer peer support, are aligned with mad pride and psych abolition, really should be doing the work to make sure lateral violence and sanism aren't being perpetuated.

followers, esp followers with lived experience, please add on!

[moonlitkilljoy]

Lo and behold! i’ve finally finished making it, the promised list of Pacific Rim fic recs for anon :-) everyone thank @ihavenomoralsss for proofreading this for me!

There’s a good chance most people who've read any amount of newmann fanfiction will have read the first two on this list, as they’re found on the first and fifth pages of the newmann ship tag on ao3 when its sorted by most kudos descending– however i’ve included them anyway because they’re there for a very good reason (which is that they’re FANTASTIC). also, i've grouped all of the "pov outsider" fics together at the end of this post, as they pretty much make up one third of the list– which feels like it warrants it's own section. feel free to dm me or send me an ask to let me know of your thoughts about any of these (or just pacific rim in general!!)! without further ado, may i present to thou, 10 fantastic newmann fics

It’s All in the Hands of a Lazy Projector by patster223

“Hermann is cursed as a child so that he may never remember anyone he meets. Theoretically, this should make falling in love impossible, but then he meets (and meets and meets and meets) Newton Geiszler.”

~10k words, 1 chapter, rated T; exactly what the summary says, it’s an au in which hermann is cursed to forget everyone he meets, it centers around newt and hermanns interactions and how they manage to grow close despite this

if i had to choose a single favorite pacific rim fanfic it’d probably have to be this one. it’s gorgeously written and tackles some themes that hit very close to home for me, personally. i’ve struggled with memory loss for a very long time now, and this fic manages to encapsulate that experience through the lens of magical-realism in a way i’ve never seen captured in any context. i left a comment to that effect (under a pseudonym because i rarely log into ao3 on my phone) and the author’s response is something that still makes me emotional pretty much every time i look at it, “I wanted to imagine a world where memory still mattered, even if it wasn’t remembered. And now, years later, I think that it does. You and I and Hermann hold memory in our bodies and our minds, even if what’s being held isn’t an exact picture or description, but rather an emotion or a question. Memory still has to matter to those with memory loss, even if we end up experiencing it differently.” so, this is not only a recommendation for quality, but also from a very personal place— it’s a fic that addresses the concept of memory loss through a lens of comfort and hope, which it is so rarely seen through, and does it phenomenally. if anyone looking at this post were to read one fic and only one fic from this list i’d want it to be this one. it also characterizes newt and hermann very well and i love their dynamic in it, it’s PHENOMENAL

Letters From Berlin by spenshi

“Newton keeps in touch with his family when he's shipped off to the Shatterdome. Jacob and Illia send care packages to the K-Science Lab.”

~12k words, 1 chapter, rated T; once more, exactly what the summary says– newt sends letters to his family and they send him packages. eventually hermann starts sending them letters (+ emails) as well :]

i read this one most recently out of all the others so it’s the freshest in my memory :-) it’s extremely homely and heartwarming!! additionally, it includes some really fun and sweet interactions between newt’s family and hermann. OH! and, of course, some very fun characterization of newt’s family

Plausible Possibility by cissues / @cacaesthesia

“Newt and Hermann experience some odd post-drift effects.”

~1k words, 1 chapter, rated G; a little exploration of ghost-drift

short and sweet! absolutely fucking adorable too. plus, this contains some headcanons/a discussion of sexuality that i was delighted to find very relatable (as an aromantic person)

Red Patent by highseize

“It's been months since the ocean closed up. Nothing will take this from her now.”

~2k words, 1 chapter, rated G; a snapshot of what mako’s life looks like after the events of the movie ^^

a rare non-hermann-and-newt-centered fic on this list!! this one actually centers around mako :D it’s adorable and i love mako with my entire heart, especially this depiction of her

fool by kaijusalad

“Newton is going to die thinking no-one left on this Earth loves him. (Fool.) He can't have that.”

~6k words, 1 chapter, rated T; hermann believes that seeking out hannibal chau and drifting with a kaiju brain once more will kill newt, and acts accordingly

i LOVE the way this fic is formatted and written– the word choice and unique use of italics and parentheses is incredible and works so well. it describes every action and scene so gorgeously and it just. man. here’s a small except devoid of context that i think showcases this perfectly: “His words are hollow, anyway. They hang in the air, lies filled with helium, a new year's resolution, an 'I'll quit smoking'. (God is real in belief; maybe if he believes in them hard enough they'll come true, and isn't that something for a man who works in numbers to think?)”

One day from lonely by Raehimura

“Hermann is standing outside Newton Geiszler’s private quarters, bony ankles poking out from under too-short standard-issue sweatpants, his hair a wreck and his red-ringed eye still sore, with a lifetime of stolen memories in his head. What if Newt isn’t there? What if he’s sleeping? Or, worse, what if he is waiting on the other side of the door with his own stolen memories fresh on his mind? Above all he remembers, sudden and frighteningly clear: This is not what they do.”

~2.5k words, 1 chapter, rated G; another very interesting exploration of newt and hermann post-drift

i disagree a little bit with some of the characterization in this fic (particular, newt thinking hermann hates him. i think newt very well knows that hermann’s very fond of him) but it’s a great read nonetheless! the best word to describe it would probably be “cozy”

This is a Totally Normal Thing for Friends to Do by SolarMorrigan / @solarmorrigan

“Hermann and Newt don't talk about it (until they do)”

~21k words, 4 chapters, rated T; a fake dating au in which hermann’s dad nags him about not having found a partner yet and hermann panics, telling him that he actually does have a partner just to get him to asking about it, but it backfires when lars expresses interest in meeting him. newt offers to play the part of partner, hijinks and relationship progression ensue. this fic also has an explicit sequel, if that’s your kind of thing

THIS FIC IS SO FUCKING GOOD. there were multiple times where i reacted out loud to things that happened in the fic– most notably a series of “holy fucking shit”s while eating lunch with some friends. it’s adorable and includes some transmasc newt content :3 this fic also includes hermann snapping and standing up to his shithead dad and its GREAT. one of my absolute favorite pacrim fics ever, i can’t recommend it enough

POV OUTSIDER FICS:

HR Complaints by IDoNotBitMyThumbAtYou / @idonotbitemythumbatyou

“Manny Flores has been with the PPDC for nearly a decade by the time he’s transferred to Hong Kong. He just wants to do his job. And he’s good at it. But when he receives the 15th complaint from one Dr. Hermann Gottlieb in only three days, he finds his patience running thin. He wonders which of the two scientists would be more of a nightmare to cohabitate a working space with: Dr. Gottlieb - sender of endless petty complaints, or Dr. Geiszler, their hapless subject. (...)”

~3k words, 1 chapter, unrated (probably G or T); hermann and newt’s relationship through the eyes of someone reading the (non-serious) complaints that hermann sends to hr

i spent three uninterrupted hours looking for this fic to link it here and it was ABSOLUTELY worth it. this fic is so fun, and it uses my favorite trope of all time!! i’m an absolute sucker for “pov outsider” type fics <3 the characterization is phenomenal, i love the oc from whose pov we view the story, and some of the lines made me actually audibly laugh. definitely another one of my absolute favorites. i think i sent a screenshot of the first sentence from the following lines to virtually everyone i know: “After another few weeks of complaints (“Dr. Geiszler asked me if I have any tattoos.” “Dr. Geiszler made an offensive tweet alluding to my personal style. I have attached a link.” “Dr. Geiszler has named his invention ‘the milking machine.’”) And continued insistence that no disciplinary action be taken, Manny was starting to suspect that the latter was closer to the truth: these were the missives of someone deeply, inconveniently in love. Christ, Manny was half in love with the guy himself at this point.” this fic rocks, do yourself a solid and please read it

On The Outside by combeferrer

“Petra Gottlieb, Hermann's mother, watches the first PPDC press conference after the world is saved and notices her son, particularly his relationship with his fellow scientist.”

~1k words, 1 chapter, rated G; for the third and final time, exactly what the description says! newt and hermanns relationship through the eyes of hermann’s mother, who watches a press conference with her son– who she hasn’t really interacted with lately– in it

ANOTHER GREAT FIC!! I love this characterization of newt and hermann’s relationship, and i find the premise and extremely enticing in and of itself so i won’t be saying anything more here <3

Disconnect, Connect Again by cypress_tree / @cypress-tree

“Raising Newt Geiszler has never been easy. Seeing him fall in love can be harder. The development of Newt and Hermann's relationship, from Jacob Geiszler's point-of-view.”

~13.5k words, 4 chapters, rated T; newt and hermann’s relationship through the eyes of newt’s father, over the course of 12 years

LOVE LOVE LOVE this author’s take on newt’s family. it works so well and is very enjoyable to read about. i wish i could articulate how much and why exactly i love this fic in a better manner, but i can’t quite find the right word’s ^^; i’m just going to leave it at “i love it dearly and i adore it’s depiction/interpretation of newt and hermann’s history (and present + future!)”

thank you for reading!! have a lovely day/night ^^ <3

[myobsessionsspace]

hey recently my friend had sent me a cute taekook edit, she thought I’d like it bc she knows I like BTS yk yadayadaya. anyway in the tiktok it seems like they’re playing a game in run bts and writing things on whiteboards. tae asks “did you come here alone” and apparently jungkook replies “im single” and i do think that that’s a weird reply to the question ‘did u come here alone’. but i was just wondering if it’s real and what’s the context. i had asked another person w a tumblr account but it seems they never got to reply to it and that’s okay. im just really curious because ive never seen this one.

Hi Lovely,

💜I really hope u don’t take this the negatively💜

My blog is for my enjoyment and anyone who enjoys what I do. My blog is public for any and all to see and that comes with pros and cons. Sadly even without sharing anything but BTS, Jimin & Jungkook, jikook love, richonne (twd), lgbtqia+ and other random things of my interest… I still get a lot of nasty unhinged messages.

I like to focus on the members and jikook in particular for their unique bond. I don’t mind delving into other duos, trios etc but from a place of positivity about their friendships.

If it was to discuss Tae & Jungkook’s friendship from any point over the years in a positive manner I’d have no issue.

Sadly I don’t feel comfortable answering anything in relation to tkk romantic theories by taekookers etc.

I’m not interested in taekookers and they don’t need to be interested in me. I don’t have the kind of content they need and don’t want to provide them with the kinda content they expect from jikookers.

I didn’t want you to think you were being ignored or feel like you can’t ever ask me anything.

BUT

I want nothing to do with tkk romantic theories, nor the subsection that create them, just not my interest.

Please don’t be discouraged from talking to me in the DMs or sending me any future asks though!

💜

[ask-ikevamp-faust]

I’m so glad you know my heart and soul only sing for you, my love. You truly have nothing to worry about… besides the fact that I’m not going to go easy on you now that you’ve responded so deliciously to my teasing. Perhaps I’ll slip you a scandalous note over breakfast, sit on your lap, or even sneak some heated kisses throughout the day, only to pull away when you begin to respond. I’m relatively small and fast, so even if you chased after me I’m sure I could try to slip away. You seem like you'd enjoy the thrill of hunting after me anyways.

For the collection sets, I was mostly looking at the Navy collection, as it matches your dark blue and rose gold preferences. However, I completely agree with your desire to expand our horizons. That being the case, I also love the aesthetics of the French Raw Silk, Rose Gold Classics, Sage Green and/or Scarlet Princess collections. What do you think of those?

Hearing about pet play from you is very interesting. As I've mentioned before, our pasts are tragically similar in some ways. I've had to be fully responsible and completely in control of myself from a very young age. So, for me, submission is a very pleasurable but highly conditional thing; I could act as a dominant figure for anyone, but I'm only able to submit to someone I fully trust and respect. The list of people that meet the criteria is not long, but you happen to be on it.

I agree that the cage and the bowl would be a bit much, but I’d be lying if I said your interest and description of this kink didn't intrigue me. I'm happy to explore it more with you and I’d certainly wear the accessories, even if it was just to dress up for you. Funnily enough, my friends have described me as a rather cat-like person, so that would be a rather fitting choice. I can be very aloof and analytical around strangers or enemies, but I’m warm, cuddly, and curious around those close to me. However, even if it isn’t tied to pet play, I definitely do have a breeding kink….

Master is a wonderful choice, and I do love the description of the fantasy. It’s not silly at all; it’s actually almost exactly what I had pictured. The other that I had in mind fits more closely with a classic scene from literature, except, of course, you’d have my full consent beforehand.

On a moonlight night, the vampire creeps through the window to sink his fangs into the tender neck of the maiden who has caught his eye, rousing her from the depths of slumber into his wicked embrace….

If it piques your interest, I can always describe it more in depth. How does that sound, my soul?

- L

(Before I shove my foot directly into my mouth, for “things I’d like to include” are you asking which kinks I plan to touch on? Or just general plot things? Either way, I can absolutely let you know. I’m genuinely enjoying the rp, thank you 🌙admin! 💜)

(Questions to recipient from admin)

Before I continue the in-character response there is something I want to discuss.

I realize there’s probably reasons you’d like to remain anonymous, I respect that. However, if the contents of the exchange go deeper into the NSFW topic, I begin to have a concern about age. Mainly that because it has been anonymous, I can’t verify anything. Seeing an age in someone’s bio/pinned post is the most I can do to verify age. I don’t want you to reveal yourself in a public way, especially if that’s not something you’re comfortable with. It’s also not something important to anyone else except to me as admin, so I am requesting a private DM in order to see your bio/pinned post. It would honestly stop my overthinking and give me peace of mind.

I’m sure you saw, I’m currently working on a detailed “NSFW rules” specific post. Until I finish that I’ll have to address things individually but this is the way I’m going to approach NSFW content with anons moving forward if they desire content further than suggestive/flirty. I hope you can understand my perspective and that this doesn’t discourage you from sending anything else.

Thank you 🌙💙

PS: To answer your questions, both things actually. A list of kinks would be great! And then I’d appreciate it if you could give me an overview on how detailed you’d like the NSFW rp to go. On a spectrum, I guess the lightest would be just discussing kink interest and sharing ideas, on the other end however it’s a more detailed exchange on the sexual encounters between the parties involved. If it’s easier, you can just respond to this in DM as well.

[salthien]

do u have any favorite hollow knight ships or headcanons? :)

yes have you heard about quirrelhol- [cartoonishly large anvil drops directly onto my skull]

(discussion below the cut - I've censored character names/keywords with periods so this (hopefully) doesn't show up in tags as it's entirely just me rambling.)

The requisite #1 Gay Bugs In My Heart aside, there are a handful of others I do care about! I really am fond of She.o and the Nailsm.ith. what if two big round bugs fell in love over a shared calling to Create and the finding of purpose beyond achieving 'perfection' in their respective crafts. I've a mind to go through their fic tag at some point. I'm curious about Lacen.et but it's hard for me to get into it with zero story context, so my interest in that will probably be very passive until The Day Of Reckoning (SS release date).

I honestly don't have much else romantically I'm very into - most other ships I'm either of the "it's cute/fine/funny, I can see it" or "not my thing, but live your life" camp, since I'm not generally a multishipper and Quir.rel and Holl.ow seem like the most popular people to throw other characters at. Generally not a big 'dead dove'/'problematic' ship fan, and I won't touch that pressurized can of worms any further than that. I'm not here to evangelize or condemn, just to do my thing like everyone else! If anyone really really needs to know my opinions on a specific ship, send me an ask/DM me and I can give my honest answer (I just don't want to kick up any drama, even accidentally.)

That being said, I am incredibly interested in explorations of quite a few of the nonromantic relationships in HK - I love anything to do with the Dreamers (Her.rah <3333) and postgame stuff with the siblings. I've got a long list of fics bookmarked in a Need To Read folder (includes stuff like sbab.l, Worldse.nse, Los.t Kin, etc.) and will likely have more properly-formed thoughts then, but I'm a sucker for narratives about healing and growth and general bittersweet angst-with-hope stuff so postgame fix-it stuff is probably always going to appeal to me the most.

As for headcanons, I am notoriously terrible at coming up with them myself oops. You'll notice I tend to gather what I like from fanon and mess with it in my own little sandbox (with all due credit) so common things like eight-limbed Horne.t, the Child of Three Queens lore (which I think is more cut-canon than fanon??), Quir.rel's antennae (and general elaboration on buggy qualities in general, for everyone), etc. As a personal headcanon for the Knight/Ghost of Hallown.est/whatever you wanna call our funky little player character, they are like. Absolute peak autism to me (in the absolute most loving way possible). Fully a sentient adult, but nonverbal/generally noncommunicative and not really a former-of-solid-relationships. They come and they go as they please and everyone finds them charming, even those who might not admit it right away.

I'm much better at "here is this idea, expand it" than "come up with something new from a vacuum". I will take a headcanon and run wild with it, but generating those on my own? That requires brain cells that I usually do not have a proper hold on.

Wow this got long. Anyways! them's my thoughts there's a billion of them

[bravewolfvesperia]

GETTING TO KNOW YOU.

respond to the following prompts out of character. then, tag others that you'd like to get to know a little bit better!

tagged by: @altosk tagging: @mistralxsoul, @ourvoids, @ervaurem if you haven't done this, @pclitesse if you do these!

ROLEPLAYER NAME: Shi (ShiShi is fine but I tend to go with Shi. if you're thinking Shinon from a ninth and tenth entry in a particular franchise, your brain is in the right place. namesakes and beloveds, friends)

ROLEPLAYER PRONOUNS: she/her

MUSE NAME: Yuri Lowell (and assorted others on my Tales multimuse)

PREFERRED COMMUNICATION: depends how often we talk. Tumblr DMs is easiest if we have brief conversation/plotting. Discord is preferred if we're starting to have regular conversations/lengthy conversations. I'm open to talking to people more though if they're interested, so if you do want to talk or gush about our muses or games, feel free to ask for my Discord! we don't have to already be talking a whole lot if you do want to move to Discord.

EXPERIENCE: I've been RPing for like, idk, as long as I can remember, but I started on Tumblr specifically around 2012. Before that it was things like ye wee old forums, messengers, etc. Tales experience is the same thing because I used to RP Tales on forums LOL.

PREFERRED ROLEPLAY TYPE: a mix of everything more or less. I like fluff and happy things mixed into angst, and if there's no room for happiness in a specific thread/situation, I like to have gentle/soft/emotional aspects littered around. I also try to just follow my muse's whims, so if anything suddenly spikes his rage meter, that's what we're goin' with folks.

PET PEEVES & DEALBREAKERS:

(this isn't as scary as it looks I'm sorry LOL)

ignoring my rules and asking to ship with me when your character's name is not in my ship list (yes, this includes OCs. if OCs aren't mentioned it's very likely because my muse has a very specific romantic inclination and chemistry won't trump that the muse is already leaning toward someone/other people by default. should be obvious but I literally recently on another blog had someone completely ignore that muse's ship list and still send me an anon to ask to ship with me (and the whole thing was indicative that they only wanted to write with me to ship and didn't really see my muse as their own muse but just as another tool in the shed). my ship list tends to be very tiny for any muse and I prefer it that way anyway because it wards off the idea that people are only writing with me to ship. I love shipping with certain pairs, but I don't write explicitly for that and am much more comfortable with the idea that people aren't following me to ship with me/going into things assuming they will be able to convince me into it when they would have presumably read my rules and know their character is not on that list. again, as in my rules, one-sided your-muse-likes-mine is totally fine - just don't get mad when it remains one-sided because you were warned. if your muse is on the list (for any of my muses), yes, it means I'm open to discussing it/writing it./being receptive of it.

disrespecting other writers plain for everyone to see on their dashboards. this includes saying vague shit like "there are no good (character name) muses out there". that is very much not the same as "there are no writers for this character/I can't find any of this character". that's a very intentional dig at certain character writers and implies they're not good enough for you because nobody writes that character the way you want them to (versus simply expressing a desire to write with a certain character but not finding anyone who writes them).

using my muse as a blank slate who is just a base directly off the game you probably played if you're here. if any of you have paid attention to my threads with a specific Flynn (hi Natty!), you are probably aware my muse is heavily influenced by canon side material. that stuff is a core part of my muse. my muse is not just a rip taken right out of game-only canon. the more I write, the more formed he becomes as his own individual muse. if you cannot respect that and will consider it "ooc" for my muse not to be a blank slate direct rip from canon every time I write with a new muse, that's a hard dealbreaker. (on that above note, for any Flynn writers who are unfamiliar with the canon side material that Flynn is a primary part of (i.e. very directly relative to things that affect my muse), I do not hold that against you and am completely willing to work things out with you! that shit is hard to find and is JP media only. there's a slew of side content for Vesperia that the west never got so I know many if not most people won't even know a lot of it exists)

PLOTS OR MEMES: I do both, but I'm more likely to be able to work out plots with characters either in my muse's canon(s) or muses from other Tales games ("canons" is things such as canon side material, Tales gachas Yuri is in, etc). if I don't know your character well (canon or OC), memes tend to work better. I find it difficult to plot specific things out when I don't know a particular series well or at all. that said, I'll write with people who know my character and are okay with using one of his verses even if I don't know your character/series. I love memes for writing, but I will definitely struggle to actually plot if I don't know the franchise. I also love randomly sent memes just for the sake of writing things!

LONG REPLIES OR SHORT REPLIES: long. short for me is like three paragraphs and I just physically can't find myself doing less. things like one-liners might pop up in dash commentary and such, but for actual threads, I write long replies because that's what comes to me. sometimes motivation really hits me with muses my muse feels close to and you might end up with a ten+ paragraph reply, so uhhh... sorry about that in advance (and my paragraphs can get bulky so doubly sorry in advance!). typically this stuff happens in more emotion-driven threads though.

BEST TIME TO WRITE: NIGHT! NIGHT! NIGHT! I'm a night owl in general, but my writing energy tends to go yeehaw on me at night.

ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSES: uhhhh uh uh for legal reasons i probably should not answer that. :)

[raayllum]

No offense but how could you support a show when a creator has been abusive to their employees? Isn't that bad?

under a read more bc jc anon

fascinated that you think this an appropriate question for you, a stranger, to ask me, also a stranger, regardless of anything, but especially when you have no understanding of my own (or any other stranger's) history with emotional abuse

which hello, hi! i am have been emotionally abused twice. it was fucked up. both times majorly sucked ass. thank you for randomly dropping an ask about an upsetting topic in my inbox with no warning. you're clearly very good with boundaries & considering people's feelings & all potential angles :))

no, i'm not particularly concerned over the lives of people i don't know personally over a situation that was resolved more than 4 years ago. i haven't been very concerned about it since the head writer of the show, who is also a queer woman (and was publicly 'outed' as one of the women apparently abused by someone who had left the company months prior - which, don't think i have to say you don't out anyone's experiences with emotional abuse without their permission, even if they talk about it later, good god) confirmed that things have improved. more details here if you're interested

bc the fallout, company got HR. literally cannot do that without the creator's go ahead. that's all the accountability i need. it's not my responsiblity to make someone i do not know better, not even the two people who spoke out ever asked for a boycott, and unlike some other fans i've also never lived in cognitive dissonance land of thinking someone is never improving/stuck as an awful person forever while also wanting the show to continue cause that's fucking Weird bro

i don't care about your moral judgements, ngl. idk what your history is and i'm not going to assume because we're Strangers, and if you're too uncomfortable with it that's your prerogative, but i'd take a queer friendly fantasy show that i enjoy with my friends any day over denying myself happiness just because someone was a dick for a time (and abusers are still People anyway, but that's a discussion for another day).

i'm not interested in the moral purity of interrogating everything i love. i'm not interested in purity culture or punishment > rehabilitation at all, actually. which is why if you wanna come off DMs and have a conversation, or send a follow up ask that's more on kilter, i'd be perfectly happy to engage. but to be frank:

no offense, but i don't really know why or how you thought this was your place. please think a little bit more thoughtfully before you choose to come into my inbox again

[thetrashywritingwitch]

i have a very embarrassing confession to make:

i started developing a hyperfixation with ur fic bsjfm since around the time chapter 32 was posted. since then i have been constantly checking up on updates and have reread the entire fic about 5-6 times now 😭😭😭

i just noticed that it’s been about a year since you’ve posted your last chapter (no judgement at all! i totally understand that life is hard and modern day capitalism sucks the motivation out of people) and i realized that for an entire year i’ve been consistently (like once a day) checking for updates/rereading chapters. this hyperfixation has kind of taken over a part of me tbh 😭😭 it’s like i cant not think about it it’s badd

anyways i’m going to try to delete tumblr again (yes i have multiple failed attempts of deleting tumblr in hopes of getting rid of my unhealthy obsession over this fanfic) so if i ever pop up here again… just know i failed for the upteenth time

i hold ur fic very dear to me. i eat ur writing up like no one’s business and i just wanted to say that i really appreciate you and ur mind for existing and coming up with a masterpiece free for anyone to read 😙🫶

ok i meant to answer this sooner but i haven't been at my computer much bc i've been doing Adult Stuff (bought and installed new outside motion sensor lights bc the old ones were held on with electrical tape, bought new fence posts to replace some rotted ones, planted some flowerssss in OUR YARD!! and other stuff :3) and if i need to type up somethin long like answering asks then doing it on mobile makes me feral (derogatory)

... anyway I-

i cannot make you keep tumblr to fuel my ENORMOUSly HUGE and BIG EGO that you're giving me here, but what i CAN DO is encourage you to send me a DM so i can absolutely enable your obsession even further by discussing the fic with you, what you enjoy about it, anything you dislike or would want to change, RANT TO ME WITH ARMS WIDE OPAAAANNNN (if u know u know)

fr tho this is incredibly sweet and thanks for feeling comfortable enough to share with me in my ask box :) i prommy the year long wait 🔫will be worth it 🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪

[ourpickwickclub]

I take time to post asks reacting to something discussed here, sometimes even researching some things and they never get posted. It seems like you only post a few asks that agree with your opinion.

I think it is more that we only come in and post or push a few through, and then go, a lot of times. For me, I don’t care at all about disagreeing because I’m usually posting speculation anyway. But I do generally skip ones that make assertions as if they know for sure, when we don’t know for sure. And I also skip really mean ones about anyone. Believe it or not I have skipped some really mean ones about GR. The reason is because I don’t want to start a firestorm and then duck out. The times I do post those types of asks are when I know I have some time to answer a bunch after.

All that said, let me know what your asks were about. If I see them, I’ll post them.

And if you ever spend a lot of time, or having certain ask published is important to you, which I totally get, dm us. Or send another quick ask reminding us.

- B

[lavenoon]

HI, Luce! Can I be sappy for a moment? I just wanted to thank you a lot for making the discord server and your AU in general! It was already fun getting into the DA fandom, but getting into the server has been a whole other level of fun! I often wake up and really want to check it immediately in the morning to see what has happened while I was asleep. I almost didn't join at first because I am shy, though I'm glad I decided to do it anyways (training myself to get over social anxiety by interacting more, can't even tell you the amount of times I force myself to hit send XD) because it's always a great time all around! I've met some very nice people through it and even if it hasn't been open that long it really just became a nice kind of familiar very quickly <3 Your AU and all it's variations are so incredibly fun to discuss and provides so much inspiration and blorbo thoughts that accompany me throughout the day! I'm just so very glad we coincided in the same corner of this very vast internet! I'm sending you a giant hug and all the good vibes for your day <3

After trials and tribulations (got distracted) I finally got to this ask!

What makes is funnier is that I had to draft this and go work because obviously I didn't get further. NOW however <3

You may be sappy just know that I keep melting at this ask aaa

And I'm so happy you joined too!! And I'm glad (and proud - because man social anxiety is a bitch) that you're being brave and interact!! I'd miss you if you didn't!!

Now I'm gonna be sappy, be warned

Because, well, yeah! I love the server!! Initially I wasn't too sure about the idea, thought I'm getting ahead of myself, that there isn't actually that kind of interest - but I'm glad I asked friends in dms and also that one post on here and then made it happen, because it's just so so nice!

I'm a very chatty person by nature (when I'm comfortable), and I just. I love that I can just blurt out a thought and then y'all jump on it and make it better, enable me to make more, and make your own!! All while there's not this pressure for it all to be fully fleshed out already. It's more a dialogue, a development, and sparking so so many of the things that do make it on here also!

I'm of course not trying to make the server like, a dlc to tumblr content or anything, I don't mention it on here to tease anyone who isn't in it, I'm just a lot more comfortable chatting on there and I love the server! It feels like a, well, a cozy little cove! Everyone is nice and it's a fun place to show off anything new in life, blorbo related or not, or hanging in vc - I've actually done streams! With me doing art in my mornings there's just not that many people who could join in the first place, but in the server it's a nice little opt in option that allows for chatting on the side! I'm a little self conscious still about my art process but it's just so so neat to have people react immediately to what I'm cooking up? Like with the CS comic yesterday hehehe, telling/ later showing the twist as I'm sketching it? Hearing the reactions out loud? Definitely worth it!

And it's just. A comfortable little corner, doesn't feel too public, and even on the lurkier days it's just really cool to see the chaos and people sniping each other, it's a little community and I love it! I love seeing the little spontaneous doodles and the agentsona thoughts that wouldn't make it on tumblr simply from the way this site is set up, it's just chatting and I love it very very much. It's really really reassuring for me too because of that, it's direct interaction and wanted direct interaction from both sides! Because yeah, social anxiety (and also rejection sensitivity) is a bitch sometimes and tumblr is still a blogging website, not a chat website! (tumblr DMs are my mortal enemy, and not just because of the weird ones I got before)

So tldr; I'm also very very happy that we found ourselves overlapping spaces in the world wide web, because I am so happy to be here with you!

Also, you've been shown as online the entire time, I do hope you slept well despite whatever your phone is doing FHDJS

[lillyontheborder]

// Some Housekeeping:

I’m starting to get disheartened by the rp community a little bit. I know I haven’t been here long at all, but this was also my first time trying out a tumblr rp blog. I don’t know how active I’ll be, but I’ll try to post. However, I’m not here to be dramatic or spread drama or ask for attention, I just want to make aware what my situation is. The reason I bring this up is because it is causing me to lack motivation, but also is draining me mentally. This is no one’s fault but my own, so please don’t feel bad or get angry at me, I’m just expressing myself.

I have been trying to interact more with blogs, however I guess I don’t really know what else to do to set relationships in stone. I was hoping to do more starters/full writings but I know that tends not to be a popular option amongst blogs vs writing rp. I just want Lilly’s relationships to develop a little quicker just because I know I won’t have much time at all once school starts. But that’s on me. I will never force anyone to do anything, as this is all just for fun. I know I am new to the community so I apologize on my part of I sound annoying or naggy in any way. If you have any ideas for rp, feel free to dm me, I’m always open to talk.

I know this is mostly an rp blog but I do make a lot of AiB content that isn’t rp (art, writing, etc), I really appreciate the support I get on it and I just want to make it clear that every note counts, it really lets me know that people are seeing and appreciating my work. I just wanted to make it clear that while this is an rp blog, I also want to make fan content for the series as there is not much out there.

I was thinking of making AiB fan merchandise and I was curious if anyone would be interested in buying it. I was thinking of making: Prints, stickers, and/or personalized comfort character letters (written for you). I have the materials to make all of these so I wasn’t sure if people would be interested as I don’t want to make it if no one will buy it.

Speaking of merchandise, my commissions are still open. I’m trying to save up for a specific reason and I love drawing AiB so if you would like, I do all kinds of art. Even stuff that isn’t AiB.

Anyways, the last thing I wanted to discuss is how thankful I am when people interact with my blog. As I stated previously, I promise I am trying my best to send in asks, I guess sometimes I just don’t really know what to say. I always get extremely excited when something pops up in my inbox and I wanted to let you all know that I really appreciate being welcomed into the community. We all love the same thing and that’s why we are all here. I hope you all enjoy rp-ing with me as much as I enjoy rp-ing with you. Please make sure to take breaks as well as take care of yourselves.

Let’s keep the AiB community alive and continue to be friends.

Thank you.

Lots of Love, Lilly ❤️