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mageofseven · 4 years ago

Note

Back again with the request of the brothers and undateables reaction to MC drunk texting them that they love, Love them ❤️

Oh thank you so much for resending this! I'm sorry about the mishap before. I hope you'll enjoy these~ Since you didn't specify, these are written from the perspective that MC and the boys are in a relationship when they text the boys.

Also, I decided to split these up into two posts so this one will only have the Brothers in it, but I will put up a post for the Undateables real soon!

Lucifer:

The man sighed at his desk, signing what felt like the thousandth paper that night. It was only 1am so the night was still young; he knew he'd be at this till morning only to have to go through his duties tomorrow without rest. It was not unusual for him, but the oldest brother was still feeling a bit burnt out.

Ding.

He paused for a moment before setting his pen down and picking up his phone from the corner of the desk.

'Daaaddy. Mammnk dispered'

Ignoring the name they gave him, the man just stared down at the text. He gave another big sigh.

'MC, where are you?'

'I djnno. I went tk a party with Mammm and Asmo and thyy jsyt went poooff.'

God, his brothers were idiots. What if something happens to MC while they're off doing whatever?

'I'll track your phone then. I'll be there soon'

'Nuuu. I jsut wanna get my phone bacc from Mamsmm'

Oh dear Diavolo...

'Love, you're texting me off your phone.'

'Ooo. Yur rite!'

'I am coming to get you now.'

'Okaaaa bye Daddynm. Love yuo.'

The man rolled his eyes, but smile slightly down at the screen. What was he going to with his Love?

Mammon:

Shit! Where'd they go?! He took MC with him to the casino to help distract the other gamblers as he played cards-- hey don't judge!! He promised to buy them a few drinks afterwards. So there they were, sittin' and drink together when this guy he owes money to starts running up and yelling at him! Of course Mammon had to bail! He told MC to run with him but at one point he turned around and the human wasn't there! He's been rushing around and searching for them for the last twenty minutes. Where did they go??

Bing. His phone went off. The moron facepalmed. He has his phone! He should have been calling them or something.

'Baaaabbby. Im loneyl.'

'Oi! Where'd you go? I told you to follow me!'

'But I waz tlkin to thhe fnny man! He evn boght more deinks.'

Shit. They're still back at the bar. But with him of all people??

'Babe, why ya drinking with that jerk??'

'Im not. Hss wife cam e adn got him.'

Wife? Oh thank Diavolo, Belinda came through for him!

'Stay put, got that? I'm heading back now.'

'Kk I love yuo babbny 😘'

Mammon blushed as he read that last message.

'Ya, ya, just stay put, human.'

Leviathan:

Okay so Levi himself is not really a drinker in most circumstances. He pretty much sees it as another thing normies do and use as an excuse to spend time with other normies. Like, why would he care about something so stupid anyway?

Still, that doesn't mean there aren't exceptions to that kind of thing. Like the new bottle he won from a contest run by the creators of the anime I Partied So Hard That I Ripped Opened The Frabric of Reality And Was Met By My Future Wife Who Is Secretly A Cat Girl From Venus! I mean, it's seriously cool! It's the same brand of Venustian wine that Nyanitia loves in the anime!

Levi was so excited when it arrived that he practically begged MC to come to his room to drink it with him as he played his new video game from Akuzon. Honestly it didn't end up like he thought it would though. The wine barely did anything to him at all. I mean, yeah, the third brother didn't have a lot of experience with alcohol but he thought he would at least feel a little different than normal. Eh, whatever. The effect is kinda lame but it's still from the anime! If it's good enough for Nyanitia then it's good enough for him.

The demon shrugged it off and got absorbed in his video game to the point where he even stopped talking to MC, which wasn't unusual. After dying a couple times, he threw his controller down.

"Uggghh, can you believe that MC--"

The boy just noticed that he was alone. Oh... was he really that boring to hangout with? The Avatar of Envy started mumbling a lot of insults to himself as he picked up the bottle.

"Was my gaming that bad? Or was it the wine?" He mused sadly. "No, I bet it was the wine. It barely did anything to me so I doubt it effected them either...."

He starts reading the label on the back, skimming till he reads a section on alcohol level. Level for demons: mild.

"That explains it..." He grumbled, continuing to read in his head.

Level for Angels: low medium. Level for Humans: HIGH. WARNING. KEEP OUT OF REACH OF HUMANS.

Oh...oh no. What's gonna happen to his Henry?? Are they gonna die?? Is Lucifer gonna kill him??? GAH! Where did they go--

Beep. His phone!

'Leeevvvvvi. I fels wooozy.'

Panicking, the boy typed back.

'Where are you??? Are you dying???'

'Nuuuu. I'm jsyt wwwoooosh.'

Gah! What does that even mean?? Before the demon could respond, he got another message.

'Leeeevvvvi chan I lvoe you~.'

The boy's face and ears blazed red. I mean, yeah, it's not the first time he's heard/read them say that but still! Now isn't the time for this!

Another message.

'Sweeeeetue. Coem love me 😢'

The demon let out a panicked yell and charged out his door. His foot collided with something and he heard a whine.

"Sweeeeetie why?" MC laid on the floor of the hallway, pouting and looking more hurt emotionally than physically.

Still panicking, Levi picked up the human and brought them back into his room. He laid them in his bathtub and start researching the affects of Venustian wine on humans.

Boy nearly collapsed from relief and exhaustion when he found out they only had a sip and shouldn't have any health issues from it.

Ends up apologizing a million times over and becomes extra protective of them for the next couple weeks and is paranoid about every food and drink placed in front of them.

Satan:

It was an average evening for him. He was in his room, reading in bed as he waited for MC to come home. Asmo managed to convince them to go to a party with him. Satan didn't really want them to go tonight, but he saw their eyes light up with just the idea of it and the blonde couldn't bring himself to say a thing. Like him, MC didn't really have any experience with parties prior to this, but unlike him, they had a great interest in them. How could he ask them not to go if this was an experience they had wanted for a long time?

Ding.

The man laid his book down next to him and reached for his phone that he laid on the closest stack of books.

'Satn, peple are sk mean 😥'

The demon launched into a sitting position.

'Who needs to die?' He texted back, protective instincts springing up inside himself for them.

'Nno. Teh people here just amke me feel so lft out.'

He sighed. MC was too sensitive for that kind of environment.

'Kitten, tell Asmo to take you home now.' Satan texted before adding 'Tell him I said so.'

'Btu hes tlkin to a succubus'

'I don't care. Tell him what I said.'

'Okaa 😔'

The demon waited a few minutes, but didn't get a new message.

'Kitten?' He texted them.

Minutes when by. Nothing. The blonde got out of bed and started pacing. When that didn't help, he started to transform from the anger at his brother. He decided to text Asmo.

'Bring them home now or so help me, you will face a different type of hell when you get back.'

No reply from his brother either. The Avatar of Wrath was ready to start breaking shit.

Ding. He quickly checked his phone. It was MC.

'Bb I love you.'

The blonde stopped in his tracks. Why--after over 20 minutes of waiting-- was that their only response?

The demon reached out for his door knob, ready to go out and hunt for them, when his door swung open, revealing his brother, who was holding up an intoxicated MC.

"Ugh, you ruined my night!" The fifth brother complained.

Satan, still in his demon form, was ready to deck the other man at best and at worst, who knows. He didn't get the chance to find out because instead, MC tumbled forward and into his arms.

"Satan," They whined. "I wanna.... I wanna lay down."

The blonde took a deep breath before looking to his brother.

"Just leave. Now." He slammed the door closed on the other demon before laying MC down in bed and joining them. He pulled the blanket over them both and held his Kitten close to his chest.

"I should have...stayed home." They mumbled.

He kissed their forehead.

"It's fine. You're fine now, Kitten."

Asmodeus:

After a long, but fun night at The Fall, the Avatar of Lust had his fill was ready to get his beauty sleep. Sadly, he had lost track of his Doll. Oh dear, where could they be? Despite being so late, there were still plenty of people out and he was having trouble tracking them down.

Beep. The demon checked his phone.

'Azzy, I lvoe you🥰'

Asmo giggled, texting back.

'Aww! I love you too! Now where did you run off to? I miss my Dolly~.'

'By eth bahroons'

The man headed off that way and found MC on the floor in the hallway that led to the bathroom.

"Well, what are you doing down there?" He teased.

MC started giggling.

"I fell."

Seeing that they weren't hurt, the demon simply bent over and helped them up. The human instantly leaned against him and hugged him close.

"I love you, Azzy." They told him, closing their eyes as they enjoy the embrace and pressing their cheek against his.

Asmo let out a small laugh then pulled back just enough to kiss his Doll on their cheek.

"Oh you're just too adorable, you know that?" He told them before leading them to the front of the building. "Now let's go home, okay?"

Beelzebub:

Beel woke up for a midnight snack and headed to the kitchen. It was a quick in and out thing, not wanting to be caught by his brothers. He grabbed a whole cabinet full of snacks and carried them back to his room.

Ding. His phone went off and as he opened the door to his room.

The demon laid his snacks on his bed and got in before grabbing his phone off the nightstand.

'Beeesly, I love oyu~'

The redhead smiled happily. It was MC.

'I love you too. When are you coming home?'

No response. The demon simply opened up a bag of chips and started eating. It's fine; he can be patient.

Instead of getting a response however, he was greeted by his Muffin at door.

"I'm baaack~." The human giggled, stumbling just slightly as they walked up to the bed and flopped down before snuggling up to the big demon.

Beel kissed the top of their head, smiling at them.

"Did you have fun with Solomon, Muffin?"

"Mhmm." They said, closing their eyes and stretching out their legs, causing some of the snacks to fall to the floor. He didn't mind.

"That's good." He sat the chip bag on the stand so he could use both hands to hold them close.

The two of them laid there, cuddled up together. The big demon stroked their hair till they heard the human's breath slow and were asleep.

"G'night, Muffin." He whispered. "Dream sweetly."

Belphegor:

It was the middle of the night and Belphie was asleep. That might sound normal for the Avatar of Sloth to you, but in actuality, this was unusual for him. The sleepy boy slept so much during the day that he was usually awake starting from whenever he woke up from his after-dinner nap up until around 4 or 5 am.

Tonight, however, Belphie really wasn't feeling it. Ya know, the whole 'awake' thing. He didn't feel like being conscious. The same reason he didn't wanna be awake was the same reason why he wasn't sleeping very deeply either.; MC wasn't there with him.

That scum Mammon took them out somewhere and they didn't even tell him. He had to hear it from Beel. The 7th brother has been grumpy since then and didn't wanna do anything so he hid away in his attic and fell asleep.

Bing. Bing. Bing.

The demon let out a frustrated sigh. That was the 9th text he got in the last two minutes. He picked up his phone from the other side of the bed and begrudgingly read his messages.

'Belpphi'

'Beelphi

'Belphii'

'Babb'

'Babe'

'Babr'

'Beeelpie'

'Heeyy'

'Mr Moomooo man pay atttention ot me 😢'

"Mr. Moomoo man?" Belphie said out loud, scowling down at the screen. If he wasn't mad at MC, he would have cracked a smile.

'What's wrong with you?' He texted.

'Mammmn lfet me all alone 😔'

Belphie eyes went wide.

'What happened?'

'Mammo owes mnoey to this big Moloc guy and eh chased Maaamkn away.'

Ugh. Mammon's a dumbass.

'Where are you?'

'I dunno. He lefy me on a bench. Teh park?'

'The one by the school?'

'Mmaybe?'

The demon let out another big sigh.

'I'll be there soon. Don't move.'

'Okyy'

A couple seconds later, they sent another text.

'I love yuo, bb. Im srry 😔'

Belphie frowned. His anger at them was dissipating.

'Yeah, I love you too, butthead. Now stay there.'

Masterlist

#obey me #obey me otome #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me mc

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livmarauder · 4 years ago

Text

𝙞𝙣𝙚𝙫𝙞𝙩𝙖𝙗𝙡𝙚 | 𝙨.𝙢

simon minter x reader (part one)

warnings: some mentions of sex but lots of fluff and some swearing requested: - notes: heyooo, this is my first imagine. hope you guys really like it hehe <3 wc: 1,427 words

part two // masterlist

when it is a dull and cold morning, the only thing i wanted to do was to roll over in my double bed and cuddle into my husbands chest for the warmth. however, when i did so, i was met with the coldness of the sheets instead.

opening my eyes slowly, i groaned to myself as i dug my head back into my pillow, suddenly remembering where i was. after shoving my face into my pillow for close to two minutes, i sat up and unplugged my phone from my nightstand seeing that i had a message.

si💕: morn y/n/n, i hope you are having an amazing time in la with freya. the guys and i just finished filming and i immediately wanted to go home and cuddle with you but then i remembered that you’re going to be in la for the next few months... anyways, i love you so so much and ill see you in a few weeks ❤

my heart warmed when i saw the message and immediately replied with a short message before i got dressed for the day.

when simon and i had met through harry, it wasn't your cliche girl meets boy and fall in love kinda thing. it was actually the complete opposite of that.

i mean, the boys still enjoy taking the piss out of our story and teasing us (causing us to flip them off all the time) but, we really really hated each other.

as soon as the boys began getting very famous and in need of a manager, harry thought it would be a good idea to call me since, one; i was in the middle of taking a business management course, two; because i was his cousin and three; because i owed him a huge favour.

meeting the boys was fine, however, spending time with them was another issue. i enjoyed the guys presence but when it came to simon, it was a big hit or miss.

he is very sarcastic, confident and very outspoken. i really admired it at first, being one of the shy ones in the lewis family. but the more i spent time with him, the more i had to resist the urge to step away from simon because at the same time, he was very immature and we would end up bickering over the smallest things when it had to do with the branding that we were creating.

he on the other hand, thought that i was a big party-pooper and was too serious all the time.

because of that, anytime i was there to just visit my cousin as well as tobi and josh, who i had become close to, i would just avoid simon and he would do the same. we would either go out to nandos, they would come over to my flat and just hangout playing games and such or on the rarest occasions, when i go over to the sidemen house, i would just stay in their room and leave as soon as i wanted to go.

one day, however, it was a really cold wintery day when harry asked me to come over for dinner. opening the door with the spare key i had, i saw that no one else was home other than the lanky one sitting on the couch scrolling through his phone, who thought i was jj. "jj mate, do you have the ice-cream?" i scoffed and replied along the lines of "fuck you, im not your maid." simon looked up to see me before rolling his eyes and was about to spout a comment back before my phone dinged.

haz🤗🙄🤍: we're snowed in, staying in a hotel for the night. stay with simon please, i don't feel comfortable with you driving home.

i visibly groaned as i looked at simon, "great... i have to stay with you for the night because harry doesn't trust me." he gave me a smirk, "i wonder why." i scoffed and flipped him off before i sat at the other end of the couch, taking out my phone and scrolling through instagram. ten minutes later, because luck wasn't on my side, the power went out, making me scream in surprise.

simon burst out laughing before i threw a pillow at him as it hit him causing him to fall backwards. he looked at me as i tried to stifle a giggle, "oh you wanna go?" pretty soon, we were running all over the house, tripping over and throwing pillows at each other. before i got tackled on the couch, "truce! truce! truce!" i sputtered out, trying to catch my breath. he laughed at me before i looked at him like for real for the first time and admired his features.

"take a picture lewis, it lasts so much longer." he whispered back to me, knocking me out of my trance as i scoffed and pushed him off me. "fuck off minter." he just continued laughing, causing a small smile to break out on my face.

that night, we really got to know each other, watching a mutual favourite tv show before we had fallen asleep next to each other on the couch causing the boys to take many photos of us as soon as they got back the next morning.

he asked me out a week later and fast-foward five years later, he proposed to me while recreating our first date which was a pillow fight and our tv binge.

however, after our wedding, while we were on our honeymoon, i got an email from one of the newest business gigs that i had gotten into, needing me to get to la asap to settle some new things for them which would benefit the sidemen as well.

so when this came up, the fear of me being pregnant while i was on the business trip scared simon. we argued about it for a while until he somehow won the tiff and we decided that we would wait until after the business trip (which we didn’t know how long would take) that we would try to create our family.

the night before i left for the airport however, that changed. that night for me had been a total nightmare, the trip had gotten extended to a total of 5 months and the weight of not seeing simon for that long after seeing him for nearly the whole day since the day we started dating took a toll on me.

simon found me later on and we comforted each other in a way we hadn't before... it was almost inevitable.

i walked out of my room only to see that freya was in the living room of the flat that we had rented for our stay here. freya had decided to come out after the first 3 weeks of me staying here since simon couldn’t (which killed him internally).

"morning frey." i said as soon as i saw her, she looked up from her daily instagram scroll and smiled, "morning y/n/n, how are you feeling?"

i shrugged my shoulders, "i honestly feel like shit, its such a cold morning today." she nodded in agreement, "well, since its a cold ass day, how about you go make some coffee and then we run-through all that we have to do today."

i groaned, still drowsy as i reluctantly went to the kitchen to do as she said.

as soon as the coffee smell filled my nose though, i felt sick and immediately ran to the bathroom and puked my guts out. freya came in minutes later and held my hair back. when i was done, she got me some water before rubbing my back soothingly, "my gosh y/n, are you okay, you were fine about like a minute ago." she asked me, her voice full of concern as i nodded, sipping my water.

"must've been something we ate last night frey, don't worry about it." i said, queasily. freya nodded, turning to leave but then seemed to realize something as she turned back, chewing her bottom lip.

"y/n, don't you find it odd that last week, you told me you were missing your period and just today, you puked your insides out."

i froze at that sentence, fuck no. freya saw my face pale and grabbed my free hand with both of hers, "let's just buy a test later on our way back from the meetings okay?" i managed a nod before my thoughts began to run nervously of how simon was gonna take it if i actually was pregnant.

#sidemen #sdmn #simon x reader #miniminter x reader #simon minter imagine #simon imagine #miniminter imagine #sidemen x reader #sdmn one shots #sidemen one shots #miniminter one shots #sidemen imagines #sdmn imagines #simon minter one shots

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mirclealignr · 4 years ago

Text

alright dudes. I’m emotional, what can i say? it’s post lady time and coming back here with all the positivity you’re giving me it’s GOD DAMN it gets to me. And guys i do NOT appreciate you all enough. so freaking watch me. b l o o d y watch me.

ready? coz this is gonna be big and probably hella annoying for all of y’all but watch me do it anyway

ALRIGHT LETS BEGIN!

@approved-by-dentists Clarissa god dammit. I freaking love you dude. You’re god damn hilarious and you brighten my day. I’m not even kidding. I LOVE YOU 😡💘 your writing is perfect, your beta reading is to die for, you are ✨ amazing ✨

@im-a-writer-right Ria i love you. You’re my affectionate drinking buddy and one day, we will be in sync. you’re so freaking supportive and i love it. Your shit posts are hilarious and gah you’re so funny. I love your writing and you’re hella goofy and i live for it.

@dreamer821 jesus did someone say the sweetest piece of pie? because good lord that is what you are! Girl i am here to remind you of how amazing you are no matter how much i gotta say it. I love you and appreciate you AND your incredible writing sweetie!

@firewhisky-kisses omg ITS YOUR NUMBER 1 FAN HYPING YOU UP! bruh, talk about an underrated blog. I can’t even like? bruh i bloody love you and the positivity you spread. your FO DAMN reblogs give me life!!!!!

@remibarnes22 hey sweetie! been a while but i love you and your chaotic energy! god damn you’re soooo sweet!!! ily girl! 🥺

@kitkatd7 boo, ily! your writing? chefs kiss. You’re so sweet and supportive and UGH you’re amazing!!!!! basically for me, you were there from the beginning and i can’t thank you enough!

@masterofthedarkness hey boo :))) you’re just the sweetest little thing with these huge bursts of chaos and i bloody love for it! you’re like that mom friend who’s hilarious and ends up in the shit with all her friends anyway. Ugh anyway, i adore you and you’re writing and you’re growing 🥺 as you should be!

@leahstypewriter omg boo, we’re new to talking but you seem freaking AWESOME! gah i can’t wait to learn more about you! and your writing is incredible you need and deserve way more credit for that!

@potterverseimagine BOO omg you’re so awesome! gah you’re like so supportive and positive and you make this community so much brighter! And your writing is so adorable like holy crap the fluff content is to die for!

@chaotic-fae-queen hey boo! gah i’ve been so flakey lately, sorry bout that! but omg i love you and how the heck you balance all your writing and original ideas and fandoms and uni is incredible! You are a m a z i n g! Ily sweets 💘

@dearspacepirates OMG my first tumblr friend. I love you honey, i’m rooting for you in the hollywood universe. SHUT IT DOWN WITH YOUR TALENT! can’t wait to see you on the big screen and walking those red carpets honey!

@harrysweasleys wth you’re so sweet and wholesome and i will never get over that. You’re writing talent is out of this world and I STAN! share the talent 🥺

@peachesandpinks HOLY GOD DAMN CRAP! this site would be darker without you. You’re just a little ray of sunshine and i can’t even 🥺 you and your writing are wonderful GAH! I LOVE YOU SWEETIE!

@lunar-nonnie to my nonnie who brightens my day with every interaction. I love you sweetie, MWAH! keep spreading that positivity!

- and i’m just gonna give some appreciation to all those that i don’t interact with as often but still appreciate.

@summer-writes you’re a god damn queen.

@summergoldenrze omg you’re so fun! i’m still waiting for us to get into Edinburgh.

@teheharrypotter you seem god damn awesome! like hella living for your energy, i love it!

@lupins-sweater omg you’re so sweet! i love talking to you, it’s so engaging and interesting!

@with1love1anu god damn nothing can bring you down and i am here. for. it. you’re amazing and i love your supportiveness.

@bl597 you just don’t get enough credit for how sweet and talented you are!

@cap-n-stuff haven’t talked a lot but you seem amazing!!! from what i’ve read of yours, it doesn’t stop there! QUEEN!

@eleven-times-lively hey :) i don’t think we’ve hardly talked apart from on the gc but hi i appreciate you <3

@kalimagik you’re so talented what the actual heck??!?!??

@fablesrose omg hey boo! you’re awesome and i love seeing you on my dash <3

@johnmurphyisbisexual hey!!! you’re so positive and i hope no one ever gives you a reason not to be! you are amazing and never forget it :)

@iliveiloveiwrite hiiii! it’s been a while but omg i love your writing! i know i’ve been behind, but i will not waste anytime catching up! QUEEN!

@lokis-amazing-fighting-skills eheheh hello!!! i love your writing and i adore talking to you! gah you’re so fun to talk to 🥺

@marauderswhisperer boo! hey girl hey! how are you hunny? been a little while! don’t ever forget that you are incredible and your writing is amazing, sweetie <3

@hufflefluff-writer omg you’re amazing wth? writing, personality, vibe, aesthetic, all of it. I love it!!!!!!

@parker-potters we don’t talk a whole lot but i appreciate you and love seeing when you’ve tagged me in some of your amazing writing!

@mischiefsemimanaged HEY SWEETIE! i love you and stay strong and positive! I hope you continue to thrive, honey!

@nebulablakemurphy again, hello! really don’t think we’ve interacted much other than the gc, but! i’ve been meaning to binge your masterlist 🥺 ugh anyway, just- i appreciate you!

@slytherinquill HEY!! i’m getting to your series, i promise. Anyway, you’re awesome! genuinely amazing.

@mysterioustruffle you’re adorable and amazing and i stan. i freaking stan!

@theweasleysredhair screamed when you followed me. You’re amazing, your writing is impeccable. I god damn STAN!

@ickle-ronniekins never met anyone who can write this twins as wonderfully as you. It’s freaking amazing. AND YOURE SO SWEET!

@thou-crusty-batch-of-nature YOIRE SO SWEET AND DESERVE SO MUCH MORE CREDIT ILY!

@willowbleedsonpaper omg sweetie! you’re amazing, you’re so awesome! i love how sweet you come across, it’s wholesome.

@slytherinwriter618 omg boo! you’re so amazing, as is your writing (which so sorry i’m behind on) and ugh keep being WONDERFUL!

@emyyjemyy god damn you’re just a bundle of joy and i love wheneve we interact! you’re such a sweetie!

@poppin-potter ugh you seem like such a sweetie and aww so squishy 🥺 you’re amazing!

sorry for the hella long post and the spam but also i’m not. Ya’ll deserve more love and appreciation and i hope i’ve given you some! MWAH TO YOU ALL!

(i know i’ve missed some, just know if you’re reading this, i love you)

#lena vents #appreciating you all #is something i need to do more #i love you #so much #its #just #yeah #MWAH #🥰🥰🥰

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selfcareparker · 4 years ago

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yesss the letter format 💝💓💘💖💞💕💖💞💓 (lovely anon)

my dearest aria (a hamilton reference lmao),

i’m home alone (bc i wanted the house alone to get my head together after my brothers were mean to me 🙃) and i’m so hype LMAO but i’m watching chloe x halle’s tiny desk concert and honestly just vibing. (this is so random) besides zendaya like they are my badass black women role models. my one accomplishment would be to learn to body roll like them LMAO

oh nevermind i can’t have anything nice, my dad just came home 🙃 WHAT A WAY TO START OFF THIS ASK WTFFF

i’m liking tfatws, the second episode was veryyy intense imo but WANDAVISION IS SO GOOD😭 i knew it was going to be my favorite from the really old trailer but it’s really good and i promise it’s not just sitcoms, girl especially cuz you’ll have all the episodes already out- we were having to wait every week😭 BUT ITS SO GOOD I PROMISE HDJSHDJSH lmao reading this i was like “i- the episodes aren’t an hour long” but i feel that, it’s hard for me to watch tfatws bc they are an hour long and i’m like 😐 but wandavision episodes are less than 30mins bc I KID YOU NOT they have the damn 10 MINUTE CREDITS DHDJSJ no i don’t think we’ve talked about this b4 lol but it all depends on the series for me. i binged love island uk in less than a week bc i was so invested and LITERALLY LOVE IT but uh those episodes are like an hour and a half, but say i was binging tfatws (it’s so hard to type that ohmigosh) i honestly would not be able to do it bc of the intensity (you may be like what intensity but if you’ve seen episode 2 by the time you’re reading this.......... isaiah and the scene afterwards is all i have to say, esp me being black it was so tough :/)

girl you’re fine, as long as you’ve experienced it once hahaha i think the reason why it’s so important to my family (this letter feels so personal and extreme HSJSJA IM SORRY) is bc my grandmother loved it and in my family i guess it’s just important to us lol like my mom and dad love it too and we have the literal VHS tapes LMAO, but it only came up recently cuz my youngest brother was watching lion guard HAHA and he wanted to see the originals :) and fun fact (unless you already know) but there’s a lion king part 2 and 1 1/2 and i have all three ON VHS HAHAHA but i love lion king 1 duh (the og) but part two’s music and love story..... is so good. anyway. 🦁

I WAS THINKING THE SAME THING DURING THE WHOLE MOVIE THEATER ENCOUNTER THING HAHAHA AND WHEN SHE WAS SAYING AWKWARD I WAS LIKE WTF THE NOISE LMAOOOO i don’t think there’s a better way to describe that whole situation than ZKDHDJSHAJAJSHDJSNAHA. yeah. yeaaaa at the cinemas (i like the word cinema more than movies 🥰) here they have chips (fries), some have ice cream, nachos, drinks, hot dogs, the cinema we were at had pretzels and like BURGERS I WAS LIKE HUH OKAY and ya know obviously popcorn but i don’t know why the theaters (or cinemas) here do that, it started a long time ago though like yearsssss

PLEASE i have the longest movie watchlist and uhh haven’t seen any of them JDJSKA (istg i use HSJSSKSH as a period - like . ) i’m still hype for cherry but very hesitant (idk if i can handle it) but i’m thinking about watching it in the next couple of weeks? i know it’ll take me forever bc i’m gonna have to keep pausing and shit but idk. i’ve asked around for very specific trigger warnings and time stamps so i REALLY know what’s coming (even if it spoiled the film a bit for me) but i do really wanna see it (i think? writing this now i’m not so sure lol) so whooooooo really knows lol, but chaos walking YES i was really excited about it :))) and about my friend uhh dude you don’t sound mean at all i was literally thinking the same thing but worse HAAKL idk what she was there for???? she bought my ticket tho so 💁🏾‍♀️ whatever

“SIMS ahh, BUNK BEDS ahh” had me cracking up lmao and you know my sims status JAJAHHAJ but i’m gonna become like you, saving every 5 minutes 😭 but that’s exactly what happened to me, i really didn’t know whether to shut it off or not but after 2 hours i was heartbroken lol i’m literally making a list of things i need to redo that wasn’t saved lmao

CAN I JUST SAY UR A MASTERMIND THOUGH??? UR SIMS GAME SOUNDS SO *chefs kiss* IM CRINE university is PAINFULLY long and LITERALLY I FEEEL THAT like you can’t do anything else without failing, i had my sim go to a party once for like a few hours and i felt so dumb afterwards like urgh he should’ve been studying LMAOO just cracking down on work honestly. UR NEIGHBOR!AU IN THE SIMS PLEASEEE i am very much in love with it, yes. (pouring rain has just suddenly begun where i am rn wow ok) i love that you put them on the same lot, that was really really smart and i love that ur living out your sexuality in the sims😭 i was abt to say “now you can say you’ve got experience bc of the sims” but ANYWAY IGNORE ME fhdhs THE ALIEN BABY DHSJSK i hope it’s not a dealbreaker for enisa. that’d be tragic. IM BACK IN UPPERCASE THO BC YES MAKING OUT IN THE SIMS IS SO HOT TO ME??? I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE STFU OH MY GOSH- all the stuff, whispering sweet nothings, and the making out, and JUST ALL OF IT!!! AM I TOUCH STARVED????? there was this time i made my sim just continue to woohoo bc it was turning me on big time. ANYWAY

half way through that i had to go to my grandmothers house (not the one that likes lion king, but uh hmm idk if you remember but i was talking abt my shit family so yeah that grandmother lol) so now i’m finishing this 🥴 and instead of chloe x halle i’m watching a tom interview lmao & if this takes me longer than 30 minutes.... imma cry

I REALLY WANNA ASK- IS IT BC UR GERMAN LIKE YOU CAN JUST WRITE OUT THAT LONG ASS WORD???? i mean i can’t write out supercalafrag- anyway, but that word is a bit nonsense, UR WORD IS A REAL WORD DUDE HDJSHS i love how ur like “maybe i mixed up these words” YEA OK.

lol i had to google what are waveformers lol (lol makes a comeback) and they look like curlers that you would sleep in (here we would call them curlers or uhm i forgot uhhhhhhh rollers i think) but ur fine when am i ever making sense?? i think the best part about these is the chaos yet we understand what the other means 😌

H20 H20 H20 OH MY GOODNESS SHE BROUGHT UP H20 OK MY LIFE WAS H20🥲 I HAVE THEIR LOCKET NECKLACE AND (short storytime) when i was younger i thought they were american despite their accents (idk i was dumb) but then i figured they weren’t when lewis went to go study in america HAHAH ALSO FAVORITE COUPLE CLEO AND LEWIS UGH WATCH ME REWATCH THE SHOW NOW THANKS (also i hated elizabeth so much) but anyway back on topic, when lewis went to go study in the US i looked up where the show took place and all that good stuff and i found out they were australian HAHAH and that started my obsession with accents LMAO the uk :’)) (i’m proofreading AND AUSTRALIA IS NOT A PART OF THE UK LMAOO IM SOO DHSJSSHS) also it is now one of my many goals (besides the body roll HAHAH) to go to mako island (that’s what it’s called right??)

about music, i googled stormzy and i might listen to a song of his.. LOL I WANNA GIVE IT A TRY IMMA DO IT FOR YOU NFDVSFSG lmaoo the german rapper had me cackling (autocorrect once again being helpful and said raper and i’m like nOO) i mean we all have that one person. can’t lie, won’t lie. my one (IM SORRY BUT AUTOCORRECT HAD “MY ONE TRUE ACCOMPLISHMENT” SITTING AND READY HDJSJA I DONT EVEN TYPE THAT wHAT) person out of my white soft boy with brown hair and brown eyes type would beeeee pete davidson. love me some petey. i was gonna say rex orange county as well lmao but i don’t really loveeee him i’m just in love with his music... and wanna be friends with him..... so 👉🏾👈🏾 (i never do that fdshsh)

oh my goodness, i love tattoos too- GASP what are you thinking of getting 🥺 i want tattoos too but i’m too indecisive to figure out what to have & where. especially in my family... idk they aren’t frowned upon but my mom’s not applauding the thought lol, if i got one it would have to be meaningful but i am absolutely in love with (for example) ariana grande’s finger tattoos !! they’re so cute and simple :’) i don’t even know if i can get tattoos? my skin is... interesting. not in a bad way!! just like.... idk how to explain it??? keyloids run in the family & i got a piercing once and it got infected soo :/ the doctor also confirmed that if i wanted tattoos they couldn’t be in color so LMAO

ONCE AGAIN THIS WHOLE THING FEELS SO TMI DHSHSSJ IM LIKE OHMIGOSH SHUT UP SHE DOESNT CARE JESJSKS

in regards to you not sleeping, i wanted to mention that dumb bird, what was the reason it was up so early aT 4AM???? SIR WHO YOU CALLING TO??? also it’s 11:30pm and idk why i’m tired???

yeah i was never SUPER into justin so i don’t know exactly what albums you’re talking about lol, i do know yummy though.. but everyone did hahaha also i listen to so much pop 🙈 i mean maybe... idk what would count as pop and what wouldn’t. that new person feeling though.. i get that. it’s like who is this new person..? i kinda feel like that with taylor swift (i was never THAT into her either though so it’s like oh wait i didn’t know you from the beginning instead of hello old friend but you’re different lol)

about the concerts, thanks 🥰🥰 that’s so sweet what you did for your mom too, it’s nice seeing them so happy like 🥲 awh AND GLEE IS AND WAS MY LIFE FOR A V V LONG TIME, i’ve been meaning to rewatch it for the longest time lmaooo but i’m just so lazy and it’s such a commitment... i’ll have to get emotionally involved again and idk if i want that rn. but i have a friend on instagram and she runs a glee fan account and it’s such a big part of her life i really don’t think i could ever be THAT obsessed with something. like another one of my friends loves tom holland so much that she changed her mom’s name in her phone to what tom’s mom’s name is in his phone (that was confusing lol) and obviously i’m not judging them AT ALL, it just couldn’t be me lol

CONCERTS LOOK LIKE SO MUCH FUN 😩😩 LIKE THE EXPERIENCE AND THE FEELINGGG URGHSJS i wanna see a few people live like ari and chloe x halle and- hmm.... idk who else FJDSJ rex orange county i guess huh anyway, the experience just sounds so amazing and the atmosphere is just ✨✨✨ yeah

aria do it do it do it do it do it- watch hamilton!! but with subtitles bc you won’t catch half of the things they’re saying without them LMAO (me and my family watched it and they all didn’t like it bc they didn’t know what was happening lol) BUT DONT WATCH IT AT 4AM LMAO ITS LITERALLY 3 HOURS LONG

yes!! superior peter fics 🥺🥺🥺🥺 and it just shows how much of an incredible writer AND PERSON you are through your fics that you can turn a blurb into 2k....... like what.

LMAO the annoying thing, sometimes i feel like i’m bothering people (like right now HAHAH) but i think it’s my antisocial side being like yeaa no one wants to talk to you like you wanna talk to them :’) idk it’s strange!! sometimes i get really ✨insecure✨ and overthink everything LOL like is this too long, im talking too much, i’m swearing too much, oh lord i’m a pain, all that good shit lmao so that’s fun:))

ALSO YOUR BLOG IS SO FUN TO ME HAHAK LIKE ITS JUST YOUR OWN AND I LOVE THAT!!! like you talk about everything and anything on here lol,, and i say that bc what you said lmao how if i was someone else i would want to fuck me so bad😭 i honestly don’t understand how i don’t have people lining up though..... but if no one’s gonna tell you... then you tell yourself, period (and sometimes telling yourself is fucking yourself HSHAJKS OK NEXT)

ohmigosh the realization you had that you graduated last year and are going to uni this year🤧 but the fact that you had a teacher who LEFT THE GROUP CHAT bc she was mad at y’all i- 😭 but yeah about your maths (i always wondered why you guys call it maths and the US calls it math. like i know so many people out of the states, not just in the uk that say maths) teacher- i saw this post that said online school is looking a lot like dora the explorer😭😭 “you have any questions?” 🦗 “okay bye then” lmao and please i love when tests have nothing to do with what you studied like ??? thanks? sometimes i get scared that my teacher will somehow find out that i googled everything? or like my answer is too close to the answer sheet or something. i get sooo nervous lol but i’m already past that point of not being able to do anything myself DHJS i mean i’m still learning like i said!! read the question, read the answer. boom. now i know the answer to the question and i learned!

THANKS 🙈🥰🤧 idk how else to explain my feelings LMAO i feel it’s cool that you find my dance lessons and voice lessons cool so thanks :’)

oh god not headache season 😭😭 allergies are the worst like it’s not even funny. is headache season just when the seasons are changing or is it like... all throughout the summer? cuz i love the summer lmaoo i love the winter too but i just love wearing as little clothes as possible LMAO

GIRL IF THAT BIRD DONT STOP CHIRPING- i am 100% convinced that it is the same bird trying to give you headaches and no sleep and it needs to stfu 😤 and pLEASE ur theme is adorable and pretty and cute but also it just feels like you? idk if i’m explaining this right or if it’s bc i’ve been talking to you for a bit but it’s cute but not innocent in a way that i’m surprised that you write smut and- yeah, that didn’t make sense!! but ur new theme is gonna look pretty too and as long as you like it, it’ll be amazing🥰

yessssss the fact that megan is gonna be ur pfp YES JUST YES

edit: ok i just need to 🥺😭 sometimes u make me wanna cry cuz i feel like you’re just a kind person. i truly mean this, the fact that you celebrate yours & others stretch marks makes me so 🥺🥺🥺 i honestly don’t know anyone who has said they want need more stretch marks and it’s just all very lovely to me :’)) OKAY IMMA STOP BEING SAPPY

#yes my fake tags are back #by popular demand #aka me #and look i have actual tags this time! #i’m seriously craving water ice rn....... huh #but it’s past midnight and i fr fr want a snack #aw man #i wrote that last paragraph while doing my tags yes #and i hope you become responsible for that anon’s orgasm #assuming they had one #and i saw your response to the tom thing and yeaa when they only look like that for something and it’s like aw bae be yourself #i’m gonna shut up now and find a snack but goodnight!! morning?? IDK #IF THESE TAGS END UP AS ACTUAL TAGS I AM SO SORRY HAHAHA #alright proofreading done and i’m gonna go eat cereal

okay i‘m on my way to a driving lesson rn and afterwards i have a zoom uni thing, and then another uni thing lmao. but hopefully i can reply to this in between because i‘ve been dying to talk to you since i got this ask dldjds💘💘💘 (i really like this heart. i had a 💖 phase for a while and now it‘s 💘 (seems like a very romantic heart but.... it is what it is idk dkddj)

^okay that was literally all i wrote before my lesson lmfao. just had the worst driving lesson ever dbdvsnylkxsksj i think i‘ve gotten too used to being good at driving and now i‘ve gotten too cocky with it 🥴 anyway i‘ve had such a stressful day and overall week but tbh i‘m already feeling better bc i can (indirectly) talk to you <333

omg i went to chloe or halle (i don‘t remember who out of the two)‘s instagram the other day and found out that they are not twins alejeleksjsksj but yes oh my god their voices are literally angelic and i can‘t wait to see Halle as Ariel (Arielle??)🥰 and omg it‘s literally 2021 and we‘ve only had......... one(?) black Disney Princess like it‘s about fucking time (I might be forgetting someone, I‘m not too familiar with the new Disney films, but as far as I remember there‘s only Tiana right? (who is literally a frog for 3/4 of the film 😭😭) so yes i‘m here for it too😌😌😌 (obviously she‘s not a cartoon like tiana ekdlek but she‘s a disney princess you know what i mean ddkjdh)

pfkejdj i‘m already overwhelmed with my parents i can‘t imagine having siblings too 😭😭 (sometimes i wish i had siblings but then other times (like after reading what you wrote dksjj) i‘m glad that i‘m an only child lmao like your brothers being mean to you and i remember when you cried and he was just like 👁👄👁 ok. like i’m totally okay being an only child sksjsj———and he doesn‘t listen to music 🤧🤧🤧 (although i guess that‘s good for you because at least he can‘t annoy you by listening to loud music that you hate dmdn)

okay okay i might watch wandavision then??? I‘ll definitely let you know!!! and yes omg i‘m loving tfatws (that really is so fucking hard to type omg) but same i totally get what you mean, i‘m not used to watching action series at all and every episode so far has been like a little movie so i‘m glad that i didn‘t wait until it was all out cause there’s no way i could binge watch that lol) and yes last episode was really intense. i‘m glad that marvel are talking about racism because (from what i‘ve seen) they haven‘t been the best in that department, and i‘m really curious to see what they‘ll do in the next episodes (curious isn‘t the right word but excited isn‘t the right wort either, like i‘m excited but in a neutral way ? i‘ll shut up dslsksj i hate that german has so many words that you cant translate because theres a really good german word that describes how i’m feeling but i cant think of a good translation ugh)

okay i absolutely need to watch lion king (and part 2 and 1/ 1/2 dksksj) AND hamilton, i might even do it soon 👀

BURGERS AT THE CINEMA? EBEEISNDBEKSK i‘ll come to the US just to go and watch a movie lmaooo, i think all the popcorn sizes and drinks are bigger as well, i‘ll come and watch chaos walking with you 😌😌 does next week work?

and yeah i‘ve seen posts with specific time stamps and trigger warning for cherry too so if you haven’t looked on tumblr yet i’ve def seen some! (but ive also seen some on twitter and yeah- i mean idk youve probably looked on tumblr but yeah- then there’s also imdb which doesn’t have time stamps i believe but quite specific warnings, mostly without spoilers!)

Tbh i don‘t think i would have even considered watching cherry if tom wasn‘t in it... (i’m personally fine with most of the triggering topics/things like for some reason i’m just stoic when i’m watching the most tragic films ever dldldldlbut the plot just... idk if it‘s for me you know? just entertainment wise?).... and even with tom in it i‘m unsure skeldls, i‘d totally get if you decide not to watch it but let me know if you do i‘d want to hear your thoughts! <3

SKSLSJJ my sims both finally graduated!! i think i played sometime last week, and i literally got the achievement/notification that i‘d been playing with this household for 24hours.... and that was BEFORE they graduated dldjdldkdksjjs

oh no my tumblr broke and three paragraphs of me talking about sims were deleted 😭😭😭

WAIT NO I TOOK SCREENSHOTSSKSK because i couldn’t press save so i knew they might be gone okay okay okay i‘m a genius

*move out

oh no idk if the quality is too bad to read... idk how good your eyes are dkdkdjjd (also sometimes it will be really bad quality for some but not for others so i hope that the you can see the pics in a normal/good quality)

Okay let me continue

OMG THE ROMANTIC AND SEXUAL STUFF IS THE BEST PART ABOUT THE SIMS DIDLDKJIkdkj i kind of miss how in the sims 3 they would be making out basically lying on top of each other if they were on a bed— but in sims 4 when they‘re sitting next to each other and everything that‘s definitely hot too 😌😭 or with hot tubs dkdkdk how one sim climbs on the other sim‘s lap before they woohoo (i used to make them skinny dip in the hot tub and then make out and woohoo so they’re like naked on top of each other even if you can‘t see anything- en e waysss)

Dkdkdkdj so @ Rindfleischet.. blah bla. so it‘s basically just loads of individual words put together/connected and that‘s a really big part of german. so yesterday i had an online Einführungsveranstaltung for uni (like it was a zoom meeting where they just talked about general stuff about the uni and i was really anxious before, idk why, but it turned out absolutely fine so) and that words consists of the two words Einführung (introduction) and Veranstaltung (event) which are also two individual words but you can make a new word (Einführungsveranstaltung, so in english that‘s basically “introduction event“ lmao) by combining those two words. there are obviously some rules like you can‘t just combine random words in a random order but you can basically make infinite words (technically). for example (i feel like i‘m teaching a class just skip this if you don’t care 🙃🙃🙃djdjdkdlns)

for example i could say Einführungsveranstaltungsteilnehmer (which is not underlined with red by tumblr because it is a grammatically correct compound word (i think that‘s what they‘re called?)) which is the words introduction + event + participant, so that word just means “participant of an introductory event“ but instead it‘s one word? i hope that makes sense? dkdkkdksks i mean it makes sense in german but idk if it makes sense to you cause idk if i‘m explaining it very well lmao,

(I just deleted a really really long paragraph that i wrote about gender in the german language and grammar, you‘re welcome slsksksj)

my capacity to think has now been used up for the week 🥴🥴🥴 i absolutely do not blame you if you just skipped over that part or can‘t be bothered to (re)read my awful explanation edkflsksjdjdj (again, i had double the amount of words but i just deleted it dkdkdlslsl but what‘s left lf my german lesson is probably confusing enough already😭i‘m sorry🥴)

so to answer your question LEJDKSKJ: it‘s really common to have long words in german, words that are just word+ word+ word + word made into one long word. obv rindfleischetikettierung..... is a very extreme example and it‘s normally just 2-4 words made into one! So yup i think that comes mostly from german and talking german and growing up here and going to school here and everything dmdfnsksx

i think the best part about these is the chaos yet we understand what the other means 😌— YES. YES. Yes. I love that about us 😌😌🥰🥰/ I love us. Yes.

okay but your friend changing her mom‘s name into tom‘s mum‘s name (was that right? Dkdkdjh)—— so Justin Bieber once posted something where you could see that his Dad‘s number was saved as „Daddy Cakes“ (which, thinking back, sounds very weird ekejjej) and till this day I have my Dad’s contact name as Tata (which is serbian for Dad lmao), “Tata🍰“ in my phone because of it 😭😭😭😭��🙃🙃 it‘s not because of justin anymore like i‘ve just gotten used to it by now but at first i did it because of justin lol........ but nowadays i don‘t think i‘m THAT type of fan of anyone- like you know how people have fandom names (Justin‘s fans are the Beliebers, One Direction fans are Directioners (writing that hurt my soul💔💔💔)) and I wouldn‘t consider myself a fan of anyone like that. like even with tom i wouldn‘t call myself........ does tom even have a name for his fans??? Well if he does, I wouldn‘t call myself that. Like i used to be such a hardcore stan for any celebrity that i liked and now it‘s just... okay, i like em. (She says on her blog where she writes fan fiction about Tom Holland — WJDJEJDKELSKSKKSNSNDXB🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃)

Omg rex orange county!!!!!! I don‘t know that many songs like I‘ve only listened to the album pony, but i love it 💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘

thanks again for what you said about my fics/writing I‘m🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

Pete Davidson Pete Davidson Pete Davidson I‘m-🥰🥰🥰🥰 and I can‘t explain why. But as blissfulparker said the other day (i don‘t want to tag her and make her read through all of this lolll) “I like my men when they look like they are on the brink of death 😍“ (or something along the lines of that) eskkejs okay pete isn‘t that bad, he looks quite good on some days but other days you‘re like... is this man alive? Like i don‘t want to be mean I love Pete so much The King of Staten Island is literally my favourite film ever (although it‘s not my #1 because of how he looks, but i mean he does look good) VUT ALSO

(Okay i was gonna look for a terrible picture of him but he really doesn‘t look as bad as people say??? like. i think he‘s hot. can‘t necessarily explain why. so that‘s that on that.)

i‘m not going chronologically right now (i just keep scrolling up to your ask and replying to whatever i see first sksksksh) so i might miss a thing or two that you said

Okay Stormzy, you really really don‘t have to dkdkdjd like i think you said you don‘t really listen to rap, and uk rap is a whole nother thing from us rap because of the accent i feel like??? (That sentence did not make sense) BUT if you‘re looking for a few songs that aren‘t like RAP rap, then I‘d recommend One Second (feat HER), Superheroes, Own it (which you might know?), ummm maybe the song Lessons?, he has a ton of Lion King references by the way dkdjdj for example in Rachael‘s Little Brother but that‘s like more RAP again if you know what I mean?😭 and it‘s also like 5 Minutes long and tbh i only started liking that song a year after that album came out lmao but Rachael‘s Little Brother is possibly my fav Stormzy song, then there is Shut Up which you absolutely need to listen to just for fun dldjdjd like it‘s just pure fun and also a little funny lmao, especially if you‘re not British (i imagine so at least) cause he‘s like shuTTTT up idk dldkdjdldkjdhdhfjfbfldlsksksks

Vossi Bop is one of his classics, and then maybeee - ok so there‘s Blinded By Your Grace Pt. 2 lmaoobdjsj it‘s very (Christian/) religious but i like it a lot even though i‘m not really Christian (at least not practicing or anything) so idk about your views on religion but i do like the song a lot just by like the sound lmao

Okay so again you absolutely DO NOT have to listen to any, especially not for me dlskdj but I really do recommend the songs Superheroes, One Second and Rachael‘s Little Brother (and all the other ones i mentioned but if you don‘t listen to a lot of his songs you should at least give these three a try <3333) also let me know some of your songs? 🥺 like i dont care who they‘re by but i‘d love to listen to some that you like and Recommend 🥰🥰🥰

Okay so skdjdjdjddhhddhdhjsk... I used to watch all of my series in German (like H2O) bc obviously they were on german tv so they were german- and i knew that most of these actors i saw on tv were american and i was always SO fascinated that they all learned german for this show??? Like I actually thought they were the people‘s real voices and that these English and American actors were learning german so they could re-record the whole ass show and do everything in german dkdkdldjdjjd... i swear I thought that until I was like 14 omg. And then the first time that I watched H2O in the original version i was sooo confused about their accents because to me all actors who spoke english were American?? I mean MOST of those shows are American so I wasn‘t completely off but yeah i was definitely caught off guard when I heard all of their Australian accents for the first time 💀💀😭😭😭

@ math vs maths, math actually makes more sense in my opinion. like you have the word mathematics, then the abbreviation would obviously be math... why would English people randomly add the s from the end??? Or maybe it makes more sense after all because it‘s like plural??? Now I‘m unsure dkdkdkdj but i do say maths because that‘s how i was taught to say it and i hear the word maths more than math but yeah dldkdjs i think math might even make more sense (okay i just tried saying math and maths is easier to pronounce but again tjat might just be me, oh god i‘ll stop talking about that disgusting thing (mathematics).)

not the crickets and dora LMAOOOSNSNSMDNBS yeah that teacher was... a lot. a lot a lot a lot didjjd but she kinda liked me so she always gave me good grades/marks but the people she didn‘t like..... ooft. OOF.

Fksksjsj idek about headache season like i just know that i get headaches from the sun and i‘m allergic to only one.. type of...pollen??? (I don’t understand the science of that whole pollen thing and idek if it’s called pollen in english i just know sex pollen from fan fics😔)and yeah we have this weird wind that makes a lot of people get headaches yeahd dkdkdj. i loved the i just love wearing as little clothes as possible LMAO lllioool i love that i really do. i always struggle so much in the summer cause i never have anything to wear. i feel like i buy so many new summer clothes every year but when i end up looking for an outfit i don‘t ever find anything 😭 (so i just go naked— lmao jk jk) but i‘m generally not the biggest fan of summer so-

OMG THIS FUCKING BIRD ISTG, okay the first time i heard it i went to sleep at like 5 am, so the next day i was like let me go to bed earlier so the bird doesn‘t keep me up, so i went to bed at 4 am (🥲) and THE BIRD JUST STARTED FUCKING CHIRPING SO LOUDLY, so the next day i went to bed at 3 am AND IT FUCKING STARTED AT 3 AM and it‘s still there 😁 every. night.

and since you said you‘ve gotten used to my theme and everything (idk where this transition came from😭) so tomorrow (2nd april) we have our... wait what‘s an anniversary but for a month.? I think month is like mensus in latin OK NO THATS DEF WRONG DKDKDJ wait

So Tomorrow is our... mensiversary💘💘💘💘💘💘 or at least from the first time you sent an ask. i couldn‘t find it on my tumblr anymore because tumblr is a bit of a bitch but i remember the first thing you ever sent (in an ask) was something lovely about my writing and i always take screenshots of stuff like that, and i found it in my gallery. and i took that screenshot of your ask on the 2nd of march so i‘m assuming that‘s when you sent it 🥰🥰 i feel like i‘ve known you for a week not a month like how is it a month already????? (i mean this in a good way lmao but i really can’t believe that its been a month wtf)

omg no you make me want to cry because i just love you so much 😭😭🥺 but about the stretch mark thing it‘s just.. it‘s not even me trying to empower other women (or anyone else who has stretch marks) to shake off these dumb insecurities that the patriarchy and capitalism have instilled in us— ok no it‘s definitely that too lmao. But i mean I‘ve always loved stretch marks, i‘ve just always loved loved loved them so much so it makes me genuinely sad that people don‘t like them. so yeah. i dont really know how to explain it lol, like i‘m not (only) hoping that people realise that hating your stretch marks is giving the men and the patriarchy what they want per se- (that made no sense) it‘s just because i love stretch marks and think they‘re beautiful and also sexy. idk dldkdjls and omg the fact that you called me kind 🥺🥺🥺 like i don‘t really have a goal in life or anything, but if i had to choose a ‘goal‘ in life it would just be to be kind. (i‘ll end this here otherwise i‘m gonna talk about being kind for 30 more lines—)

And please. Do not ever feel like you‘re annoying me or sending too much. never ever ever. I get so happy when i see that you‘ve sent me an ask. No matter if it‘s a long one like this or just a short one where you‘re saying something about a post that i reblogged or something. I love hearing from/about you and talking to you 💘💘💘💘💘💘💘💘

P.S: i‘m so sorry for the tags you‘re about to read they make even less sense than this post, also i reached the tag limit dkdkdj but i said some butterfly tattoos look tacky... and the next thing i said was since we‘re already speaking about Ariana- I DID NOT MEAN THAT SHE WAS TACKY dldkdjsj, i meant since you already mentioned some of her tattoos lmao

#lovely anon #<3 #ALSO I LOVE YOUR TAGS SM DKDJDKDL #i definitely (accidentally) didn‘t say something about every single thing you said #but this is so long already and i don‘t want to force you to read even more of my shite dldkdjsj #(i dont day shite i say shit but sometimes shite sound funnier)#*say #omg its too mate to speak english what i meant was i‘m sire i forgot to adress some of the things you said but i tried my best iwjwskb #omg adress (address? lmao) sounds so negative i mean i‘m sure i forgot to reply to some things- also *late not mate loool #omg ignore my whole german lesson i cant believe i actually wrote all of that wtf #but it took me like 20 minutes so i don‘t want to delete it 😭#and omg i hope you got to re do everything that your sims game didnt save and that it all worked out the same #😭#I NEARLY DELETED THIS ASK WITJ MY ANSWER OH MYFUCKING GOD MY FUCKING HEART #also i realised i didnt say anything at all about uni but i dont have any news like that Einführungsveranstaltung (😭) I went to was literall #just about schedules and credits and boring stuff mostly lmao #oh and tattoos!!!! it sucks that you might not be able to get the ones that you want/get any :((((( but hopefully you can at least get some #that arent in colour? 🤞🏼🤞🏼🤞🏼#so my parents aren‘t that supportive either like they most definitely wouldnt pay for it (even though they pay for a lot of my stuff lmao)#but i think in the end they know that i‘m old enough and they can‘t stop me and they‘d accept it one day so they‘re definitely not THAT bad #maybe your parents will change their mind over time? :(#or maybe youll just get one one day and ig theyll have to get used to it lol #so i want a butterfly (thats the only thing that i‘m sure about) and there are a lot of butterfly tattoos that look really tacky #but speaking of her i actually really like ariana‘s butterfly! but idk if i want that much shading- i have a whole album with like 35 photos #of just butterfly tattoos lol- i‘ll stop here tho. ldkdkd #omg im rereading this all and it‘s so messy good luck dkdkkddl #my tags got messed up and idk how to fix it #wait did i reach the tag limit and you cant even see half of these? 😭😭😭#i‘m so confused about these tags why are they not in the correct order? 😭😭😭 ily snd i‘m so sorry for dropping this post on you none of it #none of it makes sense.

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rorykillmore · 5 years ago

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are there any characters that have caught your eye recently that you're thinking of bringing to denny? any plot ideas that you would like to bring to denny with them in mind?

okay i was waiting to answer this until i had a variety of options because i was coming up blank on new character ideas while i was still apping paige

but speaking of charmed! i have admittedly been VAGUELY tempted to try out drake just because i have always. ALWAYS had such a soft spot for him, and idk, i feel like i could do something really interesting with “former demon only has [x] long to live and wants to get the most out of his life and make sure he’s done something Good to be remembered by”. the one thing holding me back is that i really enjoy his friendship with paige, buuut. i love him. idk maybe if we ever got a phoebe. or maybe i’ll at least yolo him someday, who knows

i don’t know why, but i’ve also been lowkey tempted lately to get back into transformers and try out a character from that again?? i just. have the giant robot itch. i don’t know who i would try - i’ve always been really intimidated by the most iconic characters (megatron, optimus, soundwave...) - but i am considering trying to dive back into the comics again. the idea of rping mtmte megatron still intrigues me SO much, because i’ve done the whole redemption arc thing with different characters, but megs is... i mean, the things he’s done, he knows there’s no real balancing the scales for that. but tackling a character like him who is so complicated and horrifying and trying to do better anyways is... really really interesting to me. but again. SO. intimidating. i also fucking adore optimus and have always wanted to try him out, but i can never pick a continuity and somehow he intimidates me even more than megs

i was talking about this earlier today but i always go back and forth about being tempted to write god or joan from joan of arcadia! the show’s take on god is super super interesting and while i wouldn’t really be able to treat them as a traditional character i like the idea of them... basically doing what they do on the show, ie not really interfering with anything or judging anyone but, lowkey influencing people to be better and kinder and causing positive ripple effects. and joan is... i mean she’s one of the best teenage characters ever written imo, she’s so REALISTIC and so surly and so flawed and yet there’s something so powerful about her realizing the power very small and empathetic actions have in the world. i’m gushing now but yeah that’s always kind of been at the back of my mind

not gonna lIE, maybe it’s just because episode 9 is coming out soon and i’m getting super nostalgic but i’ve been considering... doing a star wars binge and trying leia again. ironically, the last time i fell into the franchise and apped her was when episode 7 was being promoted, so, yknow. bookends. but leia is my favorite and just, a very important character to me in general, i always love revisiting her. i just keep putting off rewatching some stuff because i’m like “no i want to wait til closer to the PREMIERE” but who knows when i’ll cave,

i’ve iiiidly thought about winter from rwby too! i’m not sure yet if i’d REALLY want to, and in any case if i did try her i’d wait til jay’s schedule wasn’t so hectic, but i am genuinely interested in the schnee family dynamics. too bad i missed whitley,

also my like. what would you call it. my “unhinged disaster women” itch can never fully be scratched, so i also sometimes think about trying characters like nikki swango from fargo or alice morgan from luther or jamie moriarty from elementary (who i’ve actually already tried) but ALL of those would require watching/rewatching stuff and as you can see i already have a ton on my plate! i swear though i’ve gotten so unapologetic about my love of just. watching women be feral and messy and every time i see a character like that im like MMMMM

hmmm what else... i’m replaying silent hill downpour right now, and i do as always really love murphy and anne. i don’t know if anything will come of that this time but i enjoy them

i saw you were watching supernatural and, ngl, i say i’ve put that show behind me, but i used to love love love ruby SO much and if you ever tried anyone from it. i might lose my self restraint. idk though that would require rewatching some supernatural. and also, can denny handle two rubys?,

and last but CERTAINLY not least, i keep listening to the mean girls musical soundtrack and thinking about trying regina george! who i’ve always thought would be fun to play but, you know, i had heather chandler for a while and i didn’t want to double up, and then after i dropped her i was like “well i don’t want to pick up such a similar character for a while” but my roster has been bitchy mean girl free for AWHILE now. so maybe one day.

#wow i have a lot more considerations rn than i realized #granted all of these are just possibilities as of now but #THANKS GIZ #cuts dennys lvad wire #tailsthesales

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i-write-shakespeare-not-disney · 7 years ago

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"i know you can’t cook for shit so i’ve been bringing you dinner every night, just, y’know, to keep you alive" w/ hidge please i'd die and also draw you fanart of it

THIS WENT LONGER THAN I EXPECTED BUT IM HAPPY

Here’s the fanart:

Her mother always said a girl had to learn to cook. Ofcourse, Pidge had insisted she had more important things to do, and she wasn’tpart of gender stereotypes anyway. Anyone could survive off of dinner invites,fast food, and microwave dinners.

Except she didn’t want to. When she’d been dating Hunk, he cookeddinner every night and made breakfast for them every Saturday. Her personalfavorite was his breakfast fried rice with Spam and breakfast sausages. Healways let her sleep in and gave her acup of coffee when she woke up so she could join him to eat on the couch asthey continued whatever show they were binging.

They’d broken up on… somewhat amicable terms. She didn’thate him. And he didn’t hate her, at least she didn’t think so. She did have todrop off anything she had of his at the apartment he was rooming at with Lance.He still talked with Matt from time to time, but they worked together. Still,even Matt didn’t seem to be able to villainize Hunk.

It was a complicated breakup. They didn’t have time for eachother at all. Pidge was busy with school and work, exhausted by the time shegot home. That only made her cranky, and she’d nitpick at anything Hunk did ordidn’t do. She knew she was doing it, she just… couldn’t stop.

Then Hunk had met someone else through his cateringbusiness. He’d mentioned her as an offhand comment, a new acquaintance. ButPidge noticed he was on his phone more, that he didn’t bug Pidge to find morefree time anymore. Which on the one hand was good, but on the other… well notso much. She hadn’t gone crazy or anything. She didn’t check his messages orstalk his social media. But she noticed he was happier.

She asked him about it. And Hunk, who never lied to her, andswore he never would, told her the truth. There was nothing more than afriendship between himself and Shay. But he was ashamed to admit he had to becareful to keep it that way. That he’d nearly made mistakes in the times he metup with her. But he’d never acted on it.

Pidge had simply nodded, kissed his cheek, grabbed her keys.She claimed she was going to get a coffee to clear her head and energize herfor her studying. Which she did. But on the way back, she couldn’t stop thetears that had come out of nowhere and had to pullover. A cop had stopped forher, asking if she was okay. When Pidge explained she was just a littleemotional, the officer had offered to escort her home. Pidge thanked her anddrove home with a cop tailing her.

She’d gone into her home to find Hunk asleep on the couch,in the same spot she’d left him. She’d woken him up, tears threatening to spillall over again.

“This isn’t healthy,” she whispered. “I think… we need toend this.”

He’d protested, but Pidge made points out of their lack oftime, Hunk’s already wandering eyes, the fact that she knew she could beinsensitive when she was stressed. She didn’t want him to start hating her, andshe didn’t want to risk hating him. Not when she loved him so much.

And now, here she was, nearly a month without a singlehomecooked meal, attempting to make pancakes. It shouldn’t be this hard. Therewere instructions on the damn box, she was an engineer for crying out loud. Butshe couldn’t make a stupid fucking pancake.

She cursed as the smoke alarm went off again and stared atthe burnt piece of- God she couldn’t even call it a pancake- on the pan. Shesighed and decided if she and Hunk were supposed to be friends still, it wasokay to ask him to help her. Right? She needed food. Healthy food. Not KraftMac N’ Cheese or Stouffer’s one-person lasagna.

She bit her lip and grabbed her phone.

***

The consistent chiming of his phone was what woke Hunk up.He groaned and sat up, fumbling for his phone. He was a little confused whenthe phone showed “Katie” because he didn’t know a Katie. Except he did… he wasjust used to calling her Pidge. He unlocked his phone and scrolled up.

The last message had been about two weeks before when shelet him know she’d left a box of his things at the door. And he’d told her totake care.

Now there were more.

So uh, this is alittle weird… but I’m super hungry but…

There was a picture of something black and charred in a pan.

I KEEP BURNINGEVERYTHING!!!

Pls help me. I’mstarving & haven’t had a homecooked meal in weeks.

I just want somefucking pancakes.

Hunk laughed to himself, feeling something fond in his chest.He typed back, telling her he’d be there soon.

Thank. You. So much.

He smiled at his screen and shook his head as he got up toget dressed.

A half hour later, he was knocking on Pidge’s- Katie’s door,holding his breath. It would be the first time they see each other since theybroke up almost two months ago. The door opened and he saw Katie wearing anoversized yellow sweater and sweats, her hair pulled into a small ponytailwhile the smaller strands fell out messily. She looked embarrassed, and keptpushing her glasses up, only to pull them back down the bridge of her nose.

“Uh. Hey,” she greeted.

“Hey Pi- uh. Katie. Good morning. I was told my culinaryservices were needed.”

She grimaced and opened the door further. “You’ve beenwarned.”

Hunk laughed and walked in. “Come on, it can’t be that-Whoa.” He cleared his throat and took in the kitchen. There was a messeverywhere, and it smelled of burn… something. “You weren’t kidding when yousaid you burned everything.”

“Nope,” she answered. She looked over at him, her expressioncompletely blank. “Fire alarm went off. Twice.”

Hunk suppressed a smile, but failed because she nudged himand groaned. “Okay, well, first thing’s first,” he said, opening the fridge.“When’s the last time you went grocery shopping?”

Katie looked around as though the answer would be somewherein the kitchen. Hunk chuckled and grabbed his keys, nudging her gently towardthe door. “Oh this should be fun,” she grumbled.

***

Arriving at Wal-Mart felt… nostalgic. Hunk got a cart andPidge walked beside him, comforted by their height difference. While the carride had been comfortable because of horrible singing and laughter, being atthe store felt different. Pidge felt nervous.

“So how’ve you been?” she asked as they started for the backwhere the frozen things were.

“I’ve been okay. It’s holiday season, so everyone’s callingin for catering.” She nodded, recalling how busy he could get during theholidays. “I’m saving up to open a restaurant. They have an empty building nearthe optometrist you go to. So I’m trying to lease it.”

“No way,” she said with a smile. “Seriously? You can startthe restaurant there?”

“Well, I know a lot of chefs. Shouldn’t be hard to getwaiters and waitresses. I’m not missing much.”

“Hunk, that’s… really incredible, oh my God.”

Hunk smiled at her and raised an eyebrow. “You seem sohappy.”

“I’m happy for you! I know how long you’ve wanted to dothis, and it’s gonna come true for you!” Hunk held her gaze and smiledappreciatively. Pidge cleared her throat and chuckled as she saw a hat displayin the clothes section across from the food section. “Look!” She grabbed alarge sunhat with edges so wide they seemed to scream “Personal space please.”

“Oh boy,” he laughed, leaning against the cart.

“Put one on,” she said.

“No.”

“Please?”

“No.”

“Hunk!” He chuckled and looked at her. “Well,” she said,putting on a southern belle accent. “You’d never believe what I heard Susan sayduring Sunday’s mass.” Hunk hummed and raised an eyebrow. “She said hercasserole was better than mine!”

“Don’t blame her none, Miss Katie, you probably burned yours.”

Pidge’s jaw dropped, and she swatted at his arm as shelaughed. “I mean you’re not wrong,” she said in a normal voice. “I love thesehats. They’re so ridiculous.” She put the hat back and gestured to a different aisle.“I’m done with frozen. I can’t have another Marie Callendar’s pot pie.”

“Okay, well, what do you want to eat?”

She sighed and shrugged. “It’s hard to want to make stuffwhen it’s just me, you know? Right now I just really want pancakes and hotchocolate. And like, I know the hot chocolate is just hot milk and the packet,but it still doesn’t taste like you make it.” She looked away and busied herselfwith boxes of cake and cookie mixes set out for Christmas celebrations.

A few seconds later, Hunk said, “Okay. So today we make chocolatechip pancakes from scratch. When you want to make something else, I can helpyou out again.” Pidge looked back at him, dubious. “Come on, Katie,” he said witha smile. “Get into the cart.”

“In the cart?” he nodded and she clambered in, cross legged.Without warning, Hunk began racing between the aisles, making Pidge gasp andlaugh nervously. “Whoa-whoa! Oh my gosh!” she laughed and held onto the sides,wincing as they narrowly missed a few displays. “Hunk, you’re going too fast!”

He came to an abrupt stop and she held herself in place,laughing breathlessly as she looked up at him. “That was never a problembefore.”

Pidge’s eyebrows went up, her cheeks reddening. She turnedand kept her eyes on him refusing to back down. “I’m hungry. Now is not the timefor sexual innuendos.” She sat and pointed. “To the chocolate!”

Somehow, the search of a few simple ingredients took themnearly two hours, and Pidge had forgotten she was hungry in the first place. Bythe time they got back to her place, it was past noon. But she still wantedpancakes.

Hunk began listing the different measurements andtechniques, but Pidge was just enjoying herself by watching the way he mixed.It was quick like he was barely even thinking about what he was doing. Heworked quickly with no mess. Pidge envied it.

He began to pour the batter into a pan, spatula in hand andPidge sat herself on the counter beside the stove. She was in charge of passingthe bowl of batter to him. She bit her lip and rested her head on the cabinetsbehind her.

“So…. Shay’s cool with you doing this?”

“Sh-Shay?” he questioned, looking over at her.

She smiled and shrugged, looking away. “Uh, Lance told meyou guys started dating.” Hunk pursed his lips and looked down at the pan. “It’scool. Just… don’t want to cause any problems.”

“Things with her didn’t… work out.”

“Oh?” Hunk chuckled and shrugged, placing a couple ofpancakes on a plate. He gestured for more batter, but Pidge didn’t notice. “Why?Did something happen?”

“Does it matter?” he asked, gesturing again.

She shrugged and swung her legs. “I’m just wondering. If we’refriends, we can talk about this stuff, right?”

Hunk sighed and stood in front of her, hands on either sideof her on the counter. “You’re supposed to be learning. Not gossiping.”

It was one of those rare moments when she was at eye-levelwith him. “Oops,” she breathed. Hunk smiled slightly and Pidge bit her lip. Sheprobably seemed nosy.

“She’s not you,” he whispered. Pidge looked at him in shock.

“But… you said-”

“I know what Isaid, Pidge.” She took a sharp breath at the sound of him using her nickname again.“But just because she was pretty…. That’s not enough. She was nice and funny,but a lot of girls are. But you’re…. You’re so insanely smart, and beautiful anddetermined and strong and…. No one comes close you. No one ever will. You were morethan just my girlfriend. You were my best friend.”

Pidge let out a shaky breath and gulped. She leaned forward,her arms over his shoulders and very slowly tilted her head. Hunk shut his eyesand leaned forward to meet her lips. It didn’t last as soft and innocent.

They’d been without each other too long. Starving for eachother. Pidge was shaking with how badly she’d been craving him. To hold him, tolean against him, to feel his warmth, his lips. Hunk’s arms wrapped around hermiddle, holding her tightly.

She only pulled away when she needed to breathe, forehead pressedagainst his. “I never should’ve let you go,” she choked past the knot in herthroat.

“And I never should’ve left.”

#Hidge #pidge x hunk #hunkxpidge #vld #voltron #au #prompt #Anonymous

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apatheticaria · 4 years ago

Text

my spoilery thoughts on the last of us part ii

i apologize in advance for this super long post that you have to scroll past because i don’t know how to do the “keep reading” option thing

the only reason i’m writing this out is because i’m literally going insane from not being able to talk about my feelings for this game to anyone since no one i know actually cares lmao so this is mainly just for myself and anyone who wants to read this

the intro:

as i played through this game, i also watched a few playthroughs up until the point where i stopped to take a break. this was a game i couldn’t binge just because it’s so heavy and intense and sometimes you just gotta step away and take a breather

one of the playthroughs i followed along with was jacksepticeye’s and at the end he gave his review of the game like he normally does. i didn’t completely agree with everything he said, but for the most part i thought what he said lined up pretty well with my own opinion.

in particular, one thing that stood out to me was when he said that the introduction to this game shouldn’t have been Joel talking to Tommy about what he did at the end of the first game, but rather the whole flashback of Ellie’s birthday at the museum. then at “one” during the countdown to liftoff, the screen should’ve went black and fast forwarded to four-years-older Ellie opening her eyes in her home in Jackson (idk if i’m explaining this well, but Jack’s editor, Robin, edits this together and really sold it to me. if you wanna see it, go to the last part of Jack’s playthrough and look for it towards the last 30 minutes). i think this would have given us the time i think we all needed with Joel before he died and all the following flashbacks would be more focused on how/why Joel and Ellie’s relationship turned so distant - or hostile on Ellie’s part - and could’ve helped the pacing a bit.

Joel’s death:

potentially an unpopular opinion? but i actually like how Joel died. or uh lemme rephrase, i like the way they wrote his death. in this world of violence, hate, and brutality (actually doesn’t sound too off from our world but ahem moving on), i think the way he died was realistic, especially since he doomed all of humanity by saving Ellie in Part I. it just makes a lot of sense that someone would go after him and hunt him down

from the moment Abby and Owen stood over Jackson from the cliff, i was thinking: well theyre gonna kill Joel and since we’re gonna probably be playing as this girl for some (emphasis on some) of the game, they’re gonna go hard on the grey area of perspective in terms of revenge. which i was super on board with, but we’ll get back to that

when this game was first advertised, i didn’t know how i felt about a revenge story. it’s been told so many times and i’m never as hell-bent on revenge as much as the character is because it never feels warranted enough. that is, until i saw Joel die. watching Ellie pinned to the floor with a perfect view of his body, his face, beat to shit as she screams and begs for Abby to stop? haha that’s fucked Naughty Dog, thanks. but i do appreciate that they were able to make me just as mad as Ellie because of just how brutal his death was and how much i care, cared, about that character. no story has ever made me so incredibly enraged to the point i was with the main character full-stop to just destroy the perpetrator and take revenge. that’s why i think the way Joel dies is perfectly done. the fact that that cutscene is so horrible to watch for so many reasons just proves that it does it’s job.

Ellie’s half:

i actually don’t have too much to say about Ellie’s half of the story. this was what i both expected and wanted from the game, the whole game. while i can’t say i was having “fun”, because this isn’t really a fun game to play, you know what i mean when i say that this part was fun to play and follow.

side note: Naughty Dog’s improvement of your NPC buddy is so good, Dina and Jesse were both actually helpful, still not perfect, but also they’re not supposed to do all the work for you. i think the added layer that they could also get caught/seen and alert the enemy was completely unexpected and such a good addition to the gameplay (ofc this goes for Lev as well).

throughout the whole story, there’s kinda a problem with the pacing, and i know i’m not the first person to say that. however, i think the only big pacing issue i had with Ellie’s perspective was that kinda weird attempt of an open world map that they did with the gates. it felt a little unnecessary since i, and most other people, are playing for the story, not an open world with various side quest-like things. i missed the guitar cutscene with Ellie playing the guitar and singing to Dina (which kinda sucks, but i obviously just watched it after) because i just wanted to get back to the story rather than explore a large area. it was an attempt at something different so i won’t fault the game for that too much, but also stay in your lane lol so that section was a bit of a miss for me personally. i really liked the rest of it though, it had me engaged the whole time

Abby’s half:

ok. i have a lot to say about this half of the game since this is where most the problems occur.

first, let me preface this by saying that i don’t hate Abby. as i said, from the very beginning i knew she was going to have a, not justifiable, but an understandable reason for murdering Joel and that the game was going to be about seeing two sides to the same story. except, at the same time, i came here for Ellie, so why am i playing as this heterosexual? im mostly kidding. but fr i didn’t need the entire half of the game trying to get me to sympathize with Abby. i really didn’t need the message to be so spelt out for me, i got it from the moment i realized she was going to kill a favorite character.

i think my main gripe with the way they told this story is the way they formatted it. this story has all the elements to be amazing, but the execution just lacked the...finesse? idk if that’s the right word.

rather than splitting up the game into two halves, they could/should have integrated Abby’s story into Ellie’s so that when we cut from Abby holding the gun at Ellie in the theater to suddenly Abby as a young girl, it won’t feel so jarring when we have to start all over again with the upgrades and the timeline.

i really liked how we switched between them in the very beginning so why couldn’t that have just continued? in a book with multiple povs, the author often switches back and forth between every or every few chapters. you never see a book that starts with one perspective, then at the climax you have to start all over again from the other. at least, i’ve never seen this in any books i’ve read and i’ve read a lot ngl

maybe they forced us to stick with Abby for so long because if we’re forced to play as her, then we’re forced to get invested into her story. while this makes sense, it also really degraded at my enthusiasm for the game. it took me so long to just give up on the idea that we would be going back to Ellie relatively soon and when i did actually realize that was what was happening i was really disappointed.

instead of separating their stories, i would’ve liked to have Abby maybe one step behind Ellie the whole time so that while we play we’re just anticipating when Abby will finally catch up and it builds to this whole thing. instead, when we actually got to the point where everything was supposed to go down, we’re hit with whiplash and back to the very beginning with tutorials?? like did they just expect us to forget how to play since we switched characters?

i’m thinking, after Ellie and Dina jump over the barbed wire that explodes and Ellie’s knocked out, we could have switched over to Abby waking up in the WLF stadium. after Abby sneaks out of the stadium and you have that interaction with Jordan where he mentions Leah at the tv station, then we go back to Ellie waking up and tied to the table and we see Ellie kill Jordan.

after this i think Abby should have met Lev and Yara way sooner because i barely even remember what happened before Abby was caught by the seraphites it was so boring. so she gets caught by the seraphites AFTER we meet them through Ellie being shot through the shoulder (i still want to get all the first impressions of new stuff with Ellie because then it still makes her feel like the main character) and we meet the siblings and blahblahblah.

as a follow up, after Ellie kills Nora, which by the way, Ellie’s facial expressions are just so good with the red light while she’s just beating Nora to death? wow that entire interaction was so well done. anyway, after Ellie kills Nora, and Ellie gets back to the theater and the scene ends with her and Dina hugging, then we would switch to that whole section with Abby and Lev traveling to the hospital to get the meds and it would be cool if on her way in, Nora helps Abby and then on her way out, we run into a door we have trouble opening so we push and when it opens, Nora’s beaten up body is right there.

you get the gist. Abby’s story was barely intertwined with Ellie’s until the very end where she finds Owen and Mel dead. she doesn’t know that literally everyone else, except Leah, is dead too. i feel like that would’ve made the impact of Abby and Ellie’s fight at the theater more effective. affective? whatever i’m not an english nerd

i also think we should have gotten the flashback with Abby’s dad a little later when we’re expected to understand her character a bit more.

overall, i’m not mad about getting Abby’s side of the story, but i am mad that the way it was told felt so disconnected from Ellie. we could still get that whole arc of Abby going to the island to get Lev, she can still get her own story apart from Ellie, but she needed to have more of a interaction with Ellie’s actions.

Abby vs. Ellie, Abby’s pov:

i absolutely hate this fight. i really hate the way it was written and the way it happened. i get that the game is trying to give us Abby’s perspective and to show that in her point of view, Ellie is the villain in this story.

except, AGAIN, i don’t need this spoon fed to me!!! i KNOW that the world isn’t black and white and that people’s perspectives are different, but also? i don’t really care. both characters have gone through shit and both have done shitty things. neither of them are innocent, no one in this world is innocent (hence why i really dislike Mel, but that’s not really relevant), so it really comes down to which character you value more. in my - and most other people’s - case, it’s Ellie. i know the whole point of this fight is to make the player uncomfortable, but i wasn’t just uncomfortable, it made me legitimately start to dislike this game (spoiler for the end of this stupid-long review: i don’t completely dislike it)

the game really emphasizes that this is Abby’s story as much as it is Ellie’s and i get that, but this fight did not need to happen the way it did and the game didn’t need to be even longer after this. a lot of people say that we played from Abby’s perspective because Ellie would have killed Abby and that would be that (and she did, by the way, i relished watching Ellie get her revenge because while i don’t hate Abby, it was still so satisfying even if that wasn’t how the game wanted me to play). however however however, Abby wouldn’t have showed mercy either. she was absolutely going to kill Ellie if Dina hadn’t intervened then she was going to kill Dina if Lev hadn’t intervened.

here’s how i wouldve wanted it to go: we go back to Ellie’s perspective once Abby has the gun pointed at Ellie in the lobby and during their fight, Ellie would get the upper hand because she has weapons and shit (let’s be honest, Ellie would not win in hand-to-hand combat with fully-healthy Abby, we saw that first hand). Lev would try to jump in, but then Dina would disarm him and prevent him from escaping her grasp. then eventually Ellie would have the barrel of the shotgun pointed at Abby’s face and she would hear Lev tell her to please stop don’t kill her and Ellie would listen because the same exact thing happened to her (we could get a short flashback or something for more emotions, idk). so instead of killing Abby, Ellie would knock her out and her and Dina would leave and Lev would run to Abby’s unconscious body. this would end that cycle of revenge and because Abby has something more important to her than revenge (Lev), they would move on.

the ending:

if the game went how i just imagined, we probably wouldn’t get an ending that’s as depressing and open ended as it is, but i’m sure Neil and his team could figure something out, such as Ellie still has to deal with PTSD and Tommy’s really pissed at them and Ellie still looses her two fingers. so we get that little domestic sequence and the PTSD flashback and Tommy coming with his eye missing and showing the map. he leaves and when Ellie is about to leave in the middle of the night, Dina convinces her this time to stay and the next day Ellie tries to play the guitar one last time before giving up since she doesn’t have her fingers (i still want that last heartbreaking flashback, that one fucked me up i love it) and she goes out to leave it somewhere in the woods with it all ending with her walking away from the guitar that Joel gave her to symbolize her letting him go. idk man something like that, still not that open ended, but i’m just talking out of my ass rn

anyway that’s not how it went so we’ll stick to reality.

an open ending isn’t supposed to be unsatisfying, because that’s what this ending was. Part I does an open ending perfectly as we still get closure even though we don’t know exactly how things go afterwards (until now obviously).

after playing from Abby’s perspective for so goddamn long, it was weird to play as Ellie again, even while it was also a relief, and that makes me really sad. in the end, i did feel bad for Abby when she was literally left to starve and “hang” (but again i didn’t need 15+ hours in order to feel basic sympathy).

from the way they wrote the story, i knew Ellie wasn’t going to let it go and she was going to leave Dina and JJ. it made sense and i don’t think it was out of character for her, but the fact they did that in the first place and that Abby was the one to let go first? Abby got her revenge, she killed Joel, but Ellie never got that closure so of course she was going to go after Abby.

in the very end, Ellie is left with no one and Abby still has Lev and a group of fireflies to run to. Ellie’s biggest fear was being alone as she said in the first game, but that’s exactly what she’s left with. yeah life is unfair and i do like that the consequences feel real in this story, but i don’t think Ellie deserved to be done so damn dirty while Abby is living her best life. sure all of Abby’s friends were murdered because of Ellie and Dina leaving is Ellie’s own fault and i don’t blame Dina, but i mean we have no idea what happens to Ellie after this, where she goes. it at least feels like she’s on the road to eventually being relatively okay, as okay as you can be in this world.

i can’t completely articulate how i feel about this ending, even after three days having finished playing. all i do know is that while it’s realistic how Ellie’s story ended, i would’ve liked for Abby to get the same treatment. for her to not actually find the fireflies through the radio and escape from the Rattlers only to have no where to go so that, just like Ellie, revenge cost her everything and we don’t know where she went after.

maybe because Abby’s story was pretty much wrapped up and Ellie’s wasn’t, they’re planning for a trilogy, but i guess we’ll see.

the tldr;

this game has all the elements it needed to be amazing overall imo, i just wish they were all utilized Better. the reason it’s so hard to figure out how i feel about this game is because it has so much potential that just never came through and i’m really jealous of all the people who were blown away by this story. it’s still a good game though, but a 7/10 seems too high and 6/10 seems to low. ig it’s a 6.5/10 for me.

thanks for reading if you made it this far

#tlou2 #tlouii #the last of us #the last of us part ii #the last of us part 2 #i just love ellie a lot #i dont think abby is better than ellie for letting go because everyones an asshole #im scared of them making a part three because they would end up killing ellie somehow #this game fucked me up and im sorry if you actually read all my rambling but i appreciate you #also joel is not a bad person he’s just traumatized from losing his daughter leave him ALONE he’s HUMAN #the last of us part ii spoilers #tlou2 spoilers

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stigma-dream · 7 years ago

Text

1 | Try me [ College! AU ]

Pairing : BTS X Reader

Word Count : 6,802

Summary : Remember how in your teen years you use to fantasize how good it must feel being surrounded by the local bad boys, all trying to impress you one way or another trying to gain your attention? Well, this isn’t what you had in mind, nor would you had imagined that it would’ve started with a stupid alcohol-influenced bet.

Wednesday 11:41 p.m

“Must I really go…?

Not even a week in into the second semester and they were already planning to throw a party by the weekend. “Yes, of course you have to be there! It wouldn’t be the same without you. If I didn’t have my best girl, it’ll be like Batman without Robin!” You couldn’t help but roll your eyes, already being able to see the large toothy grinned he has always flashed.

“Hobi, that was a fail attempt at trying to butter me up you know? Plus we both know that’s not why you want me to go. You just want me to bring your drunk ass home while I won’t be able to take a single sip of alcohol. Why would I voluntarily torture myself like that?” A soft groan left pass your lips as you leaned back into the softness of your living room couch. Kicking both legs up at the already collapsing mess of a coffee table you and your roommate shared.

“C’mon (Y/N), trust me when I say It’ll be fun. Hell - I’ll even try to convince the boys at making the party a bit more… small, so there won’t be much of a mess, alright?” Raising a brow questioningly as if he were there, you reached over for the remote controller and flipped through the channels until you could find something you could settle down to watch for the mean time. “How would my existence being present at such a place benefit me, hm?“ You heard a loud smack soon followed by a groan as Hobi began to speak again. “It’ll make all seven of us happy, you know you love us too~.” You could practically see the smirk spread against his lips. “Oh dear god no - forget about it. Not leaving my cocoon to interact with other humans.”

You tilted your head to the side, eying the blanket folded neatly on the opposite arm rest. Leaning yourself across the couch only for your fingertips to slightly caress the fabric. “I did not just slap myself once for nothing (Y/N), you’re coming to the party and that’s that.” Before you could deny the offer again, you heard a mumble on the other end of the line before it cut off.

“More like a get together now..”

Frowning at the words he had slipped out, you groaned loudly and threw the phone onto the coffee table, flipping face up at the laying spot you had found yourself in. Complete forgetting about the blanket now. Staring up at the ceiling as the TV made background noise, not letting the death silence of the apartment overcome you with solitude. “Why is he insisting so much…” You mumbled, reaching up to your hair and moving some loose strands away from your field of vision. It didn’t take much that you got lost in your thoughts and sleep had taken it’s toll on you - your eyelids getting heavier by the second as you laid there on the couch and not too long after you found yourself slowly easing into a nice slumber.

Friday 2:38 p.m

Horse babe : hey hey (y/n)

Horse babe : do you already have your outfit ready?

Horse babe : well don’t wear whatever you were gonna bring

Horse babe : we decided to move the party next month as it seemed more appropriate

Horse babe : actually scratch that

Horse babe : everyone spread the rumor so fast that they prohibited us from throwing a party until next month lmao

Horse babe : but you still have to come over tomorrow, just bring something more laid back as it’ll just be the boys and I

“Who the fuck is spamming me” you muttered under your breath, reaching into your backpack that laid in the chair beside you and pulling out your cellphone. The vibration only continued in your hand as you got another harsh shush from the librarian at the front desk. Smiling at her apologetically and bowing your head slightly, you immediately unlocked your phone and put it in silent mode. Seeing the various notifications from Hoseok. Scanning the messages, a giggle past your lips at the thought of the news spreading like wildfire among the student body of the upcoming party. Only to get immediately shut down.

(Y/N) : omg hobi rlly?

(Y/N) : that must’ve suck

(Y/N) : but why must I still go? It’s not like we haven’t seen each other in years

Locking the screen and placing your phone beside you, you looked back up at your surroundings. Luckily, the library was the closest you’ve ever seen it to being empty. There was always half of the room filled with various students trying to cram a full semester worth of information into their heads all at once. In other cases, couples spread around the library goofing around and being all lovey dovey with each other. Groups of friends just storming in and messing around knowing the librarians just didn’t have the energy to even scoul them anymore. This time it was only you and a small group of students at the corner across the room - seeming to be trying to hide away from the eye of anyone. A red flickering light caught your attention and made you glance back down only to see Hoseok has replied.

Horse babe : lmao ikr like y

Horse babe : and because (y/n) ~

Horse babe : we miss you!

Eying the text suspiciously, you brought your bottom lip between your teeth unconsciously, beginning to slowly chew at it as you typed away a reply.

(Y/N) : oh wow yea sure

(Y/N) : what’s up with this sudden burst of love y'all have for me?

(Y/N) I swear if it is some sort of prank or joke y'all want to play on me I’ll rip all of your heads off and feed them to Ms. Scott’s snake.

Horse babe : omg stop no

Horse babe : we honestly have nothing better to do this weekend and we managed to find 8 nerf guns in the janitor room

Horse babe : don’t ask why we were there

Horse babe : but even more conveniently, four are one color and the other four another color

(Y/N) : so basically two teams?

Horse babe : bingo

Humming softly you brought your elbow up at the table and rested your head against your palm, debating if you should go or not. If you were absolutely free, you would have immediately agreed to meeting up with them already. But you have already planned on catching up on a series you took a small break from and cleaning around the apartment. Since your roommate is almost never home (due to her spending most of her time with her boyfriend) - you have had the whole place to yourself. Leaving clothes scattered everywhere, having unwashed dishes at the sink from probably weeks old now, and being able to roam around the apartment in nothing but your underwear freely. Though at first it felt like a small heaven having all this freedom to yourself - the dirtiness of the place was finally starting to gross you out.

(Y/N) : under one condition

Horse babe : which is?

(Y/N) : you all have to help me clean up my apartment and binge watch AHS with me

(Y/N) : beginning from end.

(Y/N) : all of you - and no dozing off during the middle or chickening out that it’s too creepy for you.

Horse babe : …

Horse babe : How am I friends with you again?

(Y/N) : Your lost ass was roaming around the halls whining for someone to help you get to class the first day

(Y/N) : and as if a cruel punishment you chose me as your victim and we somehow had first period together

(Y/N) : and from then on you clinged onto me for everything

Horse babe : YAH! (Y/N)! That’s no way to talk to your hyung!

Horse babe : plus you make it sound so uncool…

Horse babe : doesn’t matter, now you know how cool I truly am ;)

(Y/N) : lmao you? cool? you’re funny buddy

Horse babe : mk gb

(Y/N) : no bb wait im joking

(Y/N) : you’re so cool you broke the coolness-o-meter

Horse babe : …hell yeh I did

Horse babe : i’m so cool i probably threw yoongi down from his swag throne

(Y/N) : okay that’s enough of that

(Y/N) : so do you agree to coming or nah?

Horse babe : yea sure

(Y/N) : okay goodie well ttyl gotta blast

Horse babe : lmao ight

Gathering your stuff you had spread around the table, you quickly rushed out of the library - you were done for the day anyways so you’re absolutely free to go to your apartment. Walking down to the parking lot to find your car - you were a bit too late to claim a dorm at campus, so you had no other choice but to rent an apartment nearby.

To your surprise you found Taehyung and Jimin leaning against your car seeming deep in conversation within themselves. A small smirk creep onto your lips as you decided to scare the two - having have been leaning against your precious baby you had just clean yesterday. Taking much lighter steps and focusing on your breathing, you strode over to the backside of the automobile, peeking your head only to see that they haven’t noticed your presence

“Why do you think she doesn’t wanna join us tomorrow?” Jimins voice was the first to reach your ears, perking up more, now curious about their conversation. At this angle you could perfectly see how the sunlight hit his vermilion hair, giving an appearance of a soft gold gentle aura around him. His sharp jawline facing you as he tilted his head towards Taehyung, his back leaning against your precious baby as you noticed he raised a leg to press against it - eyes darting to the ground as he began to scratch the back of his neck, seeming to go deep in thought. Seconds later to think his own question further, you noticed how his eyebrows furrow up ever so slightly, a small pout forming on his devilishly full plump lips. “You don’t think…she has started to avoid us, do you?”

Being to caught up in your own thoughts about how he even dared to raise his dirty shoe against the car door, you almost missed what he had said. Your own eyebrows scrunching up, why would he even asked that? There’s nothing that they’ve done to make you dislike them…much less avoid. “ I don’t see a reason to.” Taehyung shrugged, pulling at the sleeves of his rather large jumper and crossing his arms in front of him, mindlessly playing with a loose strand of his black ripped jeans. “Knowing her, she’s probably already stressing about studying or something…” the brunette mumbled, turning to face the shorter male. Jimin cocked an eyebrow at Taehyung but shrugged, nodding as a sigh escaped his lips. “You’re probably right. She always overworks herself too much…it’s not healthy. She should just, i don’t know… lay back and enjoy the moment you know?” Taehyung nodded, chuckling softly as a small grin formed on his features “Like us?”. Jimin looked questioningly at him, taking him a second to understand what he meant. Shaking his head with a mocking laugh he punched Tae’s shoulder teasingly. “Of course not! Could you imagine though? She’ll probably have an heart attack seeing her grades drop and attendance start to stagger it’s perfect record.”

Short laughs were exchanged between the two, not before you pulled out your car keys and sounded the alarm. Watching as both men jumped away startled from the vehicle, both their eyes blown wide like deers caught in the headlight. Noticing how Jimin was clutching at his denim jacket tightly, chest heaving trying to catch his breath seeming to have been knocked out of his lungs. Flashing a mischievous grin at the boys as you arose from your hiding spot. “ I beg to differ, you seem to be the one who’s going to get a heart attack, pretty boy.”

Heads snapped toward your direction as Jimin’s chocolate brown orbs seem to have widen even more, sighing deeply and throwing his head back as he raised a hand to comb his bangs in a nervous manner. “ I swear to god (Y/N) I will get you back for this.”

Smiling even wider now, you turn to look at Taehyung only to see him kneeled down holding his stomach, his hand trying to muffle his laughs. Not helping yourself now you began to laugh yourself, raising hand in the same manner as Tae to cover your fit of giggles. Hearing your laugh was the final straw for Taehyung to let his rich laugh bang against your eardrums, his balance failing him as he fell back clutching his sides. “ o-oh my god! You should have seen your expression! It was absolutely priceless! I couldn’t imagine his eyes going wider, they almost popped out!”

Jimin clicked his tongue as he shoved his hands into the pockets of his jacket, snapping his head towards the younger one. “Yah! Quiet!” Jimin roared, his cheeks flushing as he kicked Taehyung, only kicking the air threateningly. Taehyung rolled over his side and arose from the floor, throwing his arm over Jimins shoulder as he chuckled softly.

“Aish, don’t get all pissy now~ we’re just joking around, right (Y/N)?” Tae turned to you, flashing you a cocky wink as a smirk played along his rose lips. You only shook your head, giggling softly as you walked over to the boys. Filling up Jimins other shoulder with your arm now - but due to your shorter height you only managed to bring down both boys. “Yeh, just horsing around buddy old pal.” Making eye contact with Tae, you both grinned widely, turning back to Jimin who was only frowning, his eyebrows scrunching up as his brown orbs pierced at the both of you disapprovingly.”You will be hearing from my lawyer soon, this is harassment I have the right to sue you.”

Rolling your eyes at the vermilion haired boy, you stepped back, Taehyung taking your spot and wrapping his arms around Jimin, resting his head on his shoulder as he began to hum softly. Jimin shook his head he pushed away and fixed his shirt - tucking the striped fabric back into his jeans as he scoffed. “Whatever. Hobi sent us to warn you if you don’t come tomorrow he’ll expose your double chin pictures”. You raised a brow at him, sighing softly as you pulled out your phone - showing him the text you had exchanged with Hoseok earlier. Watching him as he read the text, Taehyung peering over his shoulder and doing the same. Jimin’s lips then formed a small ‘o’, looking back up to meet your gaze. “Why do we have to help you clean? I didn’t sign up for this” Taehyung nodded agreeing with the male. Only seconds later he pulled Jimin back to whisper something in his ear - a mischievous smile forming on both of their faces. “I take it back, we’ll help you clean.”

Friday 8:30 p.m

The second you had arrived to your apartment, you had collapsed onto the sofa and passed out. Ignoring any plans you had later that day. A annoying vibration and light flashing had startled you awake from your peaceful slumber. Groaning as you opened your heavy eyelids, flinching at the bright light hitting your dazed vision. Reaching out to your phone laying in front of you, sliding the button across the screen not even bothering to see who it was. Throwing your head back into the warmth of the sofa - refusing to look at the screen.

“Ah! I won! She was asleep!”

“Jungkook stop shouting!”

A smack could be heard soon followed by a whine, peering your eyelids open again you noticed that Jungkook had called you over FaceTime, seeing him sit at the familiar sofa of their dorm - Jin sitting on the armrest laying across the top of the sofa trying to show up on screen.

“But hyung you told me if I won this bet you’ll do the dishes tonight!” Jungkook turned to Seokjin, his doe eyes seeming to play with Seokjins emotions as you heard the elders breath hitch - sighing and shaking his head.

“Aish you and your puppy eyes…”

Jungkook smiled mischievously, wiggling his eyebrows teasingly.

Puffing out your cheeks at the scene playing out, you hummed softly and that seem to have caught the boy’s attention. “May I know why you woke me up?” you mumbled out, rolling off the sofa. Reaching out to position your phone to lay against a pillow, hoping you’ll look somewhat decent at this angle. Your eyes flicking over at the right corner of the screen, seeing your bird nest of hair. Sitting on the floor across your cellphone you began to run your fingers through your hair, smoothing out some knots.

“He didn’t want to wash the dishes so he made this dumb bet that if you were asleep i’ll have to wash them. Now, if you both will excuse me, since I am not a whiny baby about having responsibilities I shall go do my part of the bet.” Seokjin arose from his spot in the couch, walking off to what you assumed the kitchen. Now being alone with Jungkook, you raised a brow questioningly at him. “Really?” Jungkook chuckled nervously, shrugging as his hand went to rub his arm. “I usually don’t mind washing them, it’s just…Yoongi hyung didn’t like something Taehyung and I hid in his food…causing him to, y’know.” He let a sheepish smile spread across his lips, glancing at you before he turned to look at something else suddenly more interesting. Clicking your tongue you shook your head, sitting up more now as you began to stretch, a long yawn soon following. “Well that’s none of my business. Anyways since you’re already here help me choose an outfit for tomorrow.”

“What, why?” he questioned, seeing the screen going all blurry as you walked across the apartment going to your bedroom. “Just because, no real reason” you replied, setting your phone against your mirror. “…considering we’re just gonna horse around tomorrow I recommend something you’ll be able to move around freely. Oh! And possibly something you can sleep in? Yoongi-hyung is bringing beer, saying you should relax tomorrow.” He flashed you another smile, the creases around his eyes deepening adorably. “Like for example what i’m wearing right now.” Jungkook pulled at his white shirt, bringing his leg up and holding against his chest smoothly to reveal his sweatpants. Frowning at him you rolled your eyes, pointing at the camera “Stop that, I know you’re showing off how flexible you are…blah” Frowning further hearing him go into a fit of laughs, shaking his head. “Sorry - can’t help that i’ve been blessed”.

Saturday 10:00 a.m

After having have chosen your outfit for today with the help of Jungkook last night, you both didn’t notice how late it had gotten. Immediately entering the realm of fantasies soon after hanging up the call. Now you sat at the corner of your bed, turning off your alarm. Sighing tiredly you began to get ready, going to go take a quick shower soon after having breakfast and before you knew it, you were already out the door heading towards campus to the boys dorm.

Walking up to the large wooden door, you removed your earbuds and twisted the knob - knowing the boys didn’t bother to lock the door knowing you’ll come. Stepping inside you were greeted by the sight of seeing a shirtless Yoongi with nothing else but his boxers and socks, laying on the couch fast asleep. Sighing you walked over to him, kneeling to his side. There really was a huge difference to awake Yoongi and fast asleep Yoongi. His usually scornful expression added unnecessary wrinkles to his youthful face. His rose tinted lips parted slightly seeming so natural unlike their usual straight line. A soft aura surrounding him - contrary to the cold and intimidating one he usually gave to strangers. You knew Yoongi long enough to know he was neither this or that. Yes, he seemed cold at first glance and his sarcasm can cause holes in your self-esteem but he isn’t always like that. It’s almost like a trial - if you overcome and endure Yoongi’s ruthless personality he’ll take off his cunning mask and show you his genuine self. If you really think about it, it’s like a defense mechanism. You haven’t yet shattered that metaphorical mask but you have noticed he seem more laid back then from the first few times meeting him. That alone seeing him slowly become more open towards you gave you the determination to fully get rid of his mask. Smiling to yourself, you didn’t take note to when you subconsciously moved his raven hair out of his face. Immediately retracted your hand, feeling your cheeks burn up in embarrassment. Glancing the living room you spotted a large blanket and brought it over to let it drape over Yoongi’s semi-nude state. Walking over to the kitchen to grab a cup of water, you heard yawning and groaning coming from the end of the corridor. Raising an eyebrow honestly not expecting anyone to be awake after seeing Yoongi on the couch, you made your over to the tall white door. Knocking gently you soon heard a raspy “come in“, swinging the door open.

Namjoon sat on the edge of his bed, massaging his throat while his free hand holded a couple of pills. Since the room was divided in half, he had his bed up against the wall. A nightstand along with a desk and a large shared bookshelf only for the same set up to be replicated on the other side of the room - connecting all furniture with the large bookshelf. A green rug spread across the middle of the room, bean bag chairs spread out across the rug. Though only the furniture and rug was the thing both had in common - for as decoration they were quiet opposites. Namjoon’s side consisted of a repeated plushie in different colors and poses, neatly aligned on shelf’s he must have put up himself. All of his textbooks and supplies nicely put in their own little containers. While the other side had many figurines, mostly consisted of Mario and Luigi. Posters of said characters adorning the pale white walls. The side of their bookcase, unlike Namjoon, consisted of Wii and 3DS games - along with a few smaller figurines. A few cookbooks and random personal choice novels on the next shelf. While finally the last shelf holded the precious campus textbooks.

Jin’s rather loud snore snapped you out of your own thoughts, blinking and bringing your attention back at the blonde haired man. “What’s wrong?” you questioned, walking over and sitting beside him. “The boys managed to bring a karaoke machine not to long ago and they decided last night-” Hearing him struggle to speak along with the heavy raspiness, you brought a finger to press against his lips you shook your head and glanced into his almond orbs, “don’t talk too much, it’ll hurt your throat even more”. Taken aback a bit, he slowly nodded and cleared his throat, wincing a bit. “I joined them in a screamo song and I seem to be loosing l my voice or something.”

“….why did you join in- actually, never mind.” You sighed, shaking your head. “Just rest today, though I already imagined you were planning on skipping, hm?” Smiling sheepishly he nodded slowly and laid back down, pulling the covers over himself. Turning off the lamp on the night stand, he reached out and gently grabbed your wrist.

“Hey, Jungkook, Taehyung, Jimin and Hoseok are all at their classes right now. None of us are planning to wake up until noon or even later, so why not rest along with me? I swear I won’t try anything funny.”

“are you sure..? I mean, your throat and all I imagine you’ll be tossing and turning in your bed so..” Blinking in realization knowing of his messy way of sleeping with any type of uncomfortableness, he nodded slowly and motioned his head over to Jin. “Touche, how about Jin-hyung then?” Turning your head to the oldest one in the room, you nodded and gave Namjoon a smile. Reaching out and pinching his nose as you made your way over to Jin’s side of the room.

“Alright, get some rest now.”

4:42 p.m

All the boys seemed to have gotten home before you had waken up, finding yourself neatly tucked in Jin’s bed. The roaring of laughter and stomping across the dorm was the thing that had managed to wake you up. Sitting up slowly, you rubbed at your eyes and glanced around your surroundings. Namjoon seem to have already gotten up and Jin was gone too. “How rude, they didn’t even bother to wake me up…” mumbling to yourself, you quickly got out of bed and down to the cold floor. Hissing softly, you spotted Jin’s bunny slippers one of the members had gotten him as a gag gift and immediately rush to slip them on. Wiggling your toes in the warm fabric, you headed towards the door and down the corridor where the noise was coming from. Peaking your head only to see all seven men sitting at the couch and floor, seeming to be playing some sort of video game.

Hoseok was the first to notice you, jumping out of his seat and skipping his way towards you. “(Y/N)! Everyone, sleeping beauty has awoken!”

He wrapped his arms around your shoulders and brought you in for a short hug, kissing the top of you head as well. Giggling at his boldness, you wrapped your arms around his waist, tilting your head up to meet his gaze. “Yeah, yeah whatever. Happy to see me here? I couldn’t risk the chance of you showing everyone my true nature.” Chuckling he only shrugged and glances up behind you, retracting his arms and stepping back.

“He’s not the only one happy to see you, y'know?” A smooth velvety voice reached your ears and you didn’t even need to look twice to know who it was. Feeling him snake his arms around your waist and lift you up, you squeaked softly and gripped onto his firm arms. “Taehyung!” You laughed, throwing your head back onto his shoulder as he began to swing the both of you around. A fit of giggles and laughed erupted from you two only to be stopped.

“Ah c’mon, you always want her to yourself Taehyung-hyung.” Being set down, you glance up only to be meet with a white shirt, tilting your head further up you saw how Jungkook pressed his tongue into the inside of his cheek, crossing his arms across his chest in a spoiled manner.

“Aish, sorry sorry, we haven’t talk in a while. I only saw her briefly yesterday ~” Taehyung cooed, resting his chin on top of your head and tightening his grip on your waist. Jungkook scoffed “and? I haven’t seen her in over a week.” Frowning, you pushed Taehyung’s arms off of you only to feel another set of strong arms slide under your legs and another to support your back, being lift up by the younger one. A proud smirk appearing on his fine lips as he held you against his chest. “Guys. You’re acting as if I’m some priced possession or something.” you groaned out, knowing your physical strength was nothing compared to theirs. Letting yourself loose and to lay limbless in Jungkook’s arms.

“Isn’t that obvious?”

“Pretty much, yeah”

Scrunching your eyebrows up, you sighed loudly again and only shook your head.

“Stop.”

Yoongi’s voice made the three of you snap your heads towards his direction. Seeing him sitting at the end of the couch, arm propped up against the armrest as he rested his head on the palm of his hand - his eyes staring back blankly. “Set the poor girl down, you both are all up in her personal bubble.” he mumbled, turning his attention back to the large screen. Jungkook immediately sets you down mumbling an apology - only to hear Jimin cry out in defeat as his character seemed to have lost. Jungkook striding over to take up the losers spot and go up against his hyung, Hoseok.

“(Y/N)” Jin called out, motioning you over to the spot between him and Namjoon. Squeezing yourselfs between them, you smiled sweetly at both. Jin sighed and shook his head, chuckling softly as he gently rubbed your back. “I must say, you really managed to stir those three over there up pretty good. I don’t know if it’s because of their ego not letting them cry defeat at losing a damsel to another or because of pure spoiledness, but damn.” Raising a brow at him questioningly, you tilted your head. “Three of them?” you questioned, only to receive another nod from the man. “Yeah, Jungkook, Taehyung and Jimin. I’m surprised Jungkook is even managing talking to you way more comfortably than Jimin, probably because he’s older than you?”

“Wait, I’m sorry, Jimin?” you asked, Jin chuckling once again and nodding towards Jimin’s direction, your gaze following and sure enough Jimin sat across, squeezed between Yoongi and Taehyung but his gaze seem to be focused on you. Making brief eye contact he sheepishly looked down, raising his hand to comb out his bangs as he lets them drape across his features, seeming to be trying to hide away from your gaze. Though at his failed attempt of hiding his face - you could see pink beginning to tint at the tips of his ears. Biting your lip trying to stop yourself from smiling at his adorable ways, you turned back to Jin only to see him gone and being replaced by Hoseok.

“They’re not the only ones” Namjoon’s hot breath reached your neck, making you shiver feeling goosebumps starting to form. Jumping slightly in surprise, you didn’t even dare to turn your head to look at him - keeping your gaze locked on the screen. “Oh? How so?”

Feeling his chest vibrate against your back as he chuckled, leaning in closer - his hair starting to tickle at your skin. “Well, you already know about the three younger ones, but what about the three eldest? Jin-hyung, Yoongi-hyung and Hoseok. Though they are much better at hiding it, I’ve known them long enough too to know when there’s something going on.” he stated. “Someone’s got their voice back,” you joked, pulling back a bit to turn to look at him questioningly. “but - what do you mean? I’m sure they’re not attracted to me in any other way than platonically so-”

“There you are right, I believe the same. But knowing them, it didn’t just come out of nowhere. There’s something going on between them all.” Namjoon pulled back now, resting against the couch. You looked at Namjoon still, various thoughts running through your head as a certain male called out your name.

“(Y/N)!” Jungkook called out, motioning you over to the empty seat beside me. “Try and beat me in this round!”

Much later that afternoon everyone has gathered around in the living room - all eight sitting in a circle facing each other. Panting and heaving filled up the room, the smell of sweat and alcohol being the only aroma present. Having have already played with the nerf guns as promised, Yoongi bringing out the beer and Taehyung soon after pulling the karaoke machine out you swear your body couldn’t take any other physical activity to do. Having had screamed your lungs out while singing a duet with Jungkook and running around the whole dorm trying to escape Hoseok’s and Jimin’s nerf hits - all while having alcohol running through your system.

“Guys, Guys, Guys” Taehyung spoke into the mic, licking his lips as he took a deep breath, his eyes fluttering trying to stay awake as the alcohol threatened to play effect - pausing before speaking again. “Let’s play some more. Spin the bottle anyone?” Hoseok was the first to react, nodding ecstatically. “Yeah! Here,” he gripped the bottle beside him and took a swing at it, gulping down the remainder of the liquid. Sighing contently as he lays the bottle in the middle of the circle. Everyone wiggled in closer, Jimin the first to reach out for the bottle. Spinning it only for it to go flying over to Jungkook, making both males laugh.

“Nice one Jimin-hyung,” Jungkook cooed, glancing down at the bottle and pointing over at Jin “but it looks like Jin-hyung is our first victim.” Jin perked up, hearing his name bringing him out of his train of thoughts. Jimin grinned widely, deep creases appearing under his eyes. “ Truth or Dare?” Jin hummed in thought, rotating the bottle in his hand, observing as the liquid splash around. “Truth”

Audible sighs and groans could be heard, shaking your head at the groups immature behavior. “Guys, come on now”

“Alright, let’s see hmm…did you use cheats to win earlier?” Jimin questioned, raising a brow at the elder one.

“Yeah! That was totally unfair how you won!” Hoseok cried out, Namjoon nodding agreeing with him.

Jungkook snorts and shrugged, looking over at Hoseok. “But I was able to beat his ‘impossible ways’ “. adding air quotes to his statement. “But you’re also Mr. Good at Everything I do.” Yoongi spoke up, taking a swing from his beer. Before Jungkook could respond, Jin spoke up. “No, I didn’t cheat - just many years of training.” Everyone seem to just drop the topic and nod, Jin reaching out for the bottle and spinning it. Yoongi chuckled softly as the bottle landed on him, looking at Jin. “Dare.” he said, Taehyung’s cackling could be heard. A few other guys chuckling softly to themselves. “Chug down two beers in a minute or less, take even a second longer and we all would take a turn at slapping you across the face.”

It went out like this for a while - asking dumb questions and making idiotic dares. For example when Taehyung dared Jungkook to jump from the top floor only to land in a bucket. Of course the rest of the guys had to stop Jungkook from actually doing it claiming that if he didn’t it’ll hurt his pride - all while Taehyung was busy filling a bucket up with water. Or when Namjoon had to rip apart one of his plushies being dared from Yoongi. Being left close to tears and clutching at his ‘son’. Hoseok had to come clean that he was absolutely terrified of any bondage play. Jimin giving Jungkook a lap dance that only ended up in a playful fight.

“Ah! It landed on you Yoongi!” Hoseok exclaimed, clapping as he saw how hard Yoongi was trying to remain conscious, his head keep bouncing as he went into short naps. Snapping up hearing Hoseok and nodding, waving his hand as he ruffled his hair in a form of distraction. “Yeah, yeah. Dare.”

Namjoon pulled Jin over, whispering something into his ear as Jin nodded, crawling over to Hoseok and whispering it into his ear. A large smile spread across his features, nodding quickly and clapping once again to gain everyone’s attention. “Yoongi! I dare you to kiss (Y/N)!”

Choking on a sip you were taking from your beverage you turned to Hoseok wide-eyed. “I’m sorry what?” Hoseok only winked at you, nodding over to Yoongi’s direction only to see him already crawling over to you. “Don’t I have any say in this?” you questioned and before you know it Yoongi tugged at your wrist - making you turn your head in his direction. “No.” Acting fast he cupped your face in his hands - though his touch was cold you could feel how gently he was trying to be, his skin smooth and soft. His eyes narrowed as he observed your features, unconsciously licking his lips as he slowly began to lean in. “I’m sorry” he mumbled softly, the kiss fast and chaste. It only lasted a few second to the others, but to you, it lasted minutes. Not because of how amazing the kiss was or because how you felt sparks, but because you could feel how hard Yoongi tried to shove his tongue down your throat. Plus, he reeked of alcohol - being the one who had drank the most.

Pulling apart from each other you could help but scrunch up your nose in disgust, rubbing your mouth with the sleeve of your hoodie. Taehyung took notice and raised a brow, pointing a finger up at Yoongi who hasn’t moved from his spot. “His kisses suck don’t they.” he claimed, gaining everyone’s attention. You shook your head immediately as a blush started to tint your cheeks “no it’s not that”

Jungkook pulled at your wrist forcefully causing you to tumble over into his lap, his free hand moving to tilt your chin up “I’ll show you what a real kiss is~” he cooed, his lips dangerously close to yours. Before you had time to even react, you were being pulled again only to fall into another lap. Strong arms wrapping themselves around you protectively. “No!” Jimin whined, the alcohol playing with him. Jimin nuzzles down into your shoulder and breathed in your scent, giggling happily to himself as he held you close. “Mine.” He said, kissing at your neck lovingly.

“Woah, woah! Calm down there!” Jin shouted, pulling you out of Jimins grip and setting you beside him. “We do not treat a lady like that! As if she’s an object you could easily claim, hah. Right Hoseok?” Jin turned to Hoseok, receiving his approving nod only to nod himself as well. “That’s what I thought, now -”

“But what if she wants to be claimed?” Taehyung chirped up, tilting his head innocently.

Jin narrowed his eyes at the brunette and raised an eyebrow “what do you mean?”

“I meant what I said - what if she wants to be claimed by one of us? The one who can win her heart the first. Whoever she falls for has the right to completly claim (Y/N) as their own.” He stated, the attention of the rest of the boys turning to Taehyung.

“Wait then, like a bet?” Questioned Jimin

“What if no one can swoon her?” Added Hoseok, perking up curiously.

“Yeah like a bet. We all have a month to see who can win her over and if we can’t.” He paused to think for a moment. “Then, she has the choice to completely forget about us and leave or stay. But, if you’re asking me, knowing how dirty some of you play she’ll want to leave.”

“I’m in.” Jungkook spoke, scooting over to Taehyung’s side.

“Me too.” Hoseok spoke, joining the other two across from him.

Yoongi only silently crawled over, sitting beside Hoseok and nodding at Taehyung.

Jimin only leaned against Jungkook already having being sat beside Taehyung and raised his hand up in the air proudly. “I shall join as well.”

Jin looked at all five men and shook his head, wrapping his arm around your shoulder and hugging you to his side. “This is ridiculous, I can’t even believe you-”

“Hyung. If you play, you could save (Y/N) from all of our little tricks at winning her over you know? Playing as well and all.” Taehyung added, a visible smirk spreading to his lips as he raised his eyebrows at the elder.

Jin looked at you worriedly and squeezed your shoulder, sighing as he brought his head down to debate with himself to accept the offer or not. Finally he nodded and slowly let’s go of your shoulder, mumbling a small apology as he went over to join the rest.

“Don’t I have any say in this?”you groaned, honestly not surprised by their behavior. Taehyung shook his head and turned to Namjoon who had sat himself on the couch. “What about you hyung?”

Namjoon shook his head and smiled “I can’t, I view (Y/N) as a little sister so if I joined - it’ll be kinda weird. Plus, she’ll need the help of someone who’s actually capable of having some information of you all.”

Taehyung nodded and shrugged, turning back to face you with a large boxy smile. “Alright well! Do you wanna play along with this bet, (Y/N)?” Taehyung questioned, his arm reaching out. Rolling your eyed you immediately took his hand into yours and shook it, a mischievous smirk plastered against your face. “Try me.”

#bts x reader #bts imagine #bts scenario #kim taehyung x reader #kim seokjin x reader #kim namjoon x reader'#jung hoseok x rewader #jeon jungkook x reader #min yoongi x reader #park jimin x reader #kpop fanfiction #kpop x reader #v x reader #jin x reader #rap monster x reader #jhope x reader #jungkook x reader #suga x reader #jimin x reader

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television-romantic · 8 years ago

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Windows to the Soul

Title: Windows to the Soul

Characters: Cas x Reader, Dean, Sam

Summary: Reader runs away and is on the verge of death. When an angel comes and saves her.

Warnings: None? Cursing maybe? Almost death? Lots of medical stuff though…

Word Count: About 2,000

A/N: Hi! This is my first Cas x Reader fic and will probably be a bit of a slow burn. I’m kinda new to this so be kind! Feedback is always appreciated!

Prologue

Cold, so fucking cold. There is snow everywhere, falling from the sky, on the streets, almost completely covering the sidewalk till it’s basically a hill. Despite me being completely decked out in winter gear. I’m freezing my fucking tits off. Why out of all days did I decide to leave when it started to snow?

You know why.

Trapped, I felt trapped in that fucking house. Sure, I had everything I could ever want in that house. Movie theater, Gourmet food, Huge garden, Rooms filled with books. That’s right rooms, as in more than one. I had everything. Except…

What? Except fucking company? You think you deserve friends? Love? You do realize you’re risking your life for it right now. Just for a-

“Shut up!” I yell, startling the pedestrians around me. “Dammit, great now we have people staring! You happy?”

Very, now you can just turn around back to the house. That, or you can keep walking and talking to yourself until someone calls the cops. Your choice, sweetie.

“You know we’re way too far from the house to just walk back and-”

Call him then!

“No fucking way!” I mutter, now trying to find the nearest and warmest spot. I just need to lie down…Just for a second.

No! You can’t sleep. Do you know the last time you ate? Two days! That and plus all this walking…You’ll die. And did you not realize why all of a sudden I’m here? Your body is going to overdrive. I’m the last resort, Y/N, you need to call hi-

“I’ll be fine!” I interrupt, walking over to an seemingly safe alleyway. By safe, I mean empty. “You heard what god said, an angel will be there for me when I need him most.” I say with smirk, not entirely believing it myself.

Yeah right! And when’s the last time anybody was there for us?

“Crowley…” I mutter, my smile growing bigger, remembering the incident.

Exactly! That’s why you need to call him! Now, Preferably!

I settle down against the brick wall behind some abandoned cardboard box. So sleepy…

“You know he won’t understand why I’m doing this. He’ll just stick me back at that houssssse…” I mumble, my words becoming slurred.

Y/N!

“Mmm, just a quick nap..”

Stop, wake up! If you go down so do I, you know this!

“Well maybe that will shut you up once and for-”

Y/N? Y/N! Wake-

Silence, Darkness, Nothing. Finally, I’m at Peace! It’s been so long… Wait, what’s that? God? It’s so bright… I see a figure, it’s walking towards me… Stop, please tell me it’s not time! I’m not ready. It comes closer. I had so much I wanted to do. Closer. I’m not strong enough yet! I won’t be able to defeat hi-

My eyes snap open and I’m greeted by bright blue ones. It belongs to a man. He looks so pretty… His scruff, his soft pink lips, his jaw line… But it’s his eyes. They’re so blue, like the sky on a perfect day, so full of…something? Wisdom? Hope? Love? How can someone look so beautiful and so perfect? An angel, maybe? It’s my angel! God was right! He has come!

I reach to touch his face. My arm suddenly feeling heavier than usual. I wish I could feel his scruff through these gloves. But even with them off it’ll just feel numb from the cold… He looks at me with his eyes full of questions and worry. I smile weakly at him trying to reassure him. “My Angel, don’t worry.” I mumble, my voice hoarse, how long have I been out? “You have come to save me, right?” Before I can hear an answer from my angel, I hear a loud shrill sound, and my vision goes dark.

The last thing I hear is her

Heh…guess you were right…this time.

Chapter 1

Today was like any other day in the bunker. There was no new cases. Sam just got back from shopping for tonight’s dinner. Dean just finished cleaning the impala from the last road trip. And right now they were both sitting down and binge-watching Jessica Jones. Today was supposed to be like any other day.

“Dean, Sam!” A gruff voice calls out. They turn around and see Cas, holding a girl in his arms…

Dean and Sam immediately get up and run up to Cas. “Wha-What happened? Who is she?” Dean moves closer to the girl cas is holding, inspecting her for injuries.

“Put her on the couch,” Sam says before running to the first-aid in the bathroom.

“She was in a alleyway in Colorado,” Cas says, walking briskly to the couch and setting her down. ”She was freezing, frost was forming on her face, she was turning blue.”

“And why were you in Colorado?” Dean grunts, gathering all the blankets around the room.

Sam comes back with the first aid and sets it down next to the couch. He inspects her face again before kneeling down beside her and unzipping her jacket.

“What are you doing?” Cas moves closer to Sam in almost a defensive stance.

“She’s cold Cas,” Sam sighs and continues undressing her. “Wearing wet, snow, and ice covered clothes isn’t helping her.” After he finishes the outer-layer of clothes and is done checking her arms and legs for injuries, he towards Dean, who has a pile of blankets in his hands. He takes the blankets and quickly lays a couple over her. “Clothes,” He mutters towards Dean, “Get thick clothes.” Dean runs towards one of the bedrooms grabbing as many sweaters and sweats that she could wear. Cas, on the other hand, is still standing there next to Sam and the girl. Looking distressed as ever.

“I-I couldn’t heal her…she has some sort of protective…thing” He mutters. Sam pauses briefly before, setting a throw pillow under her head.

“Cas, why were you in Colorado?” Sam mutters, looking up at Cas.

But before Cas can answer Dean runs in with a pile of clothes. “She Okay?” Dean says, handing over the clothes to Sam.

Sam takes the clothes and sets them down next to him. He then, reaches under the blanket were the girl is lying and starts to remove her clothes without looking. He feels her stomach and notices how easily he can feel her ribs. He looks back up at her face and realizes how sunken in it is as well.

He sighs and removes his hand from under the blanket, “She could be worse, but she’s malnourished and probably dehydrated.” He looks up at Cas and at Dean, deciding who to call on. He settles his eyes back on Cas, “Cas, go to a hospital and go get IV bags and one Parenteral nutrition bag.” And like that Cas is gone in a flash.

Sam starts to redress her with the clothes Dean gave him, obviously without looking. Meanwhile, Dean is rummaging through the first aid, gathering all the needles and tubes he can find. By the time the both finish, Cas is back with arms full of IV bags and One milky looking bag, probably the Parenteral bag. After Dean finds all the supplies he stands up and grabs the bags from Cas and sets them down by Sam along with the needles and and tubes.

“We also need the-”

“IV Pole, on it,” Dean interrupts, running the down the hall and to the bathroom.

Sam grabs the girl’s arm to put outside the blanket, then starts to set up the IVs. Cas watches with a worried look. God, he feels so useless right now. He’s a freaking angel and all he can do is watch! ‘Why couldn’t I use my grace? Why of all angels did he think I could do it?’

“Cas!” Sam calls out again, trying to get his attention. Clearly annoyed at this point.

“Y-yes? Sorry.” Cas stutters out, getting to ready to go to wherever Sam needs him to go this time.

Sam sighs, “I’m asking you why you were in Colorado?”

“Oh, Right. About that. Well-” But, before Cas can explain Dean is running back in wheeling in a pole with wheels and hooks on the top.

“Got it!” Dean calls out grabbing the IV bag that Sam had set up and is now needled into the girl’s arm. Sam, takes the girl’s arm and grabs tape from the Med kit so the needle doesn’t come out of her arm. Dean hooks the IV bag to the pole and turns a knob on the tube leading to the girl’s arm. The clear liquid starts to drip out into the girl’s arm. The girl show no reaction, still sleeping quietly, as if nothing was happening to her.

Sam takes out a small flashlight from the Med kit and turns it on. Lifting up the girl’s eyelids open he checks for any bad signs. He’s greeted with Y/E/C slightly rolled back, but her pupils slightly growing smaller from the light. Nothing bad, thank god.

“You didn’t answer my question Cas.” Sam muttered, setting the girl’s arm down and tucking it under the blanket.

“Is she gonna be okay?” Cas asks worriedly, clearly ignoring Sam’s question.

Sam sighs annoyed by Cas trying to avoid the question, “Yes, she should be at least…It depends if she wakes up. Which is why I asked for that Nutrition bag. She might slip into a coma if she doesn’t wake up soon to eat.”

“Why can’t we wake her up yet?” Dean asks with the same worried voice as Cas.

“I-I honestly don’t know,” Sam says, running his hand through his hair frustratingly. “I mean, if she could she probably be awake, especially after sticking a needle in her. But by looking into her eyes she shows no signs of being in a coma.” or being dead.

A sigh of relief washes over both Dean and Cas as they slump back into arm chairs on either side of the couch. Who knew Dean would have to spend his day off trying to save some strange girl from dying. Why was she here anyway? And why couldn’t she wake up?

“God, he told me she would be there,” Cas pipes up, before anybody could ask for the 5th time. Dean and Sam look at him with shock as well as some other emotion they can’t quite point out yet themselves.

“You mean-”

“The God,” Dean interrupts, “As in Chuck? The one who is supposedly with his sister? He told you that a strange girl was in an alleyway? And you just went and saved her?”

“What was I supposed to do Dean?” Cas sounding more annoyed and exhausted at this point. “Leave her? Obviously she has to be of some sort of importance. And by the look of her being immune to my powers, she kinda is.” Cas huffs sinking further into the chair.

“But he didn’t like, tell you anything about her?” Sam says, finally finding a way to enter the conversation.

“No, he just said that there was a girl that need my help and that ‘by his command, I must protect by however means necessary.’ “ Cas mutters, using air quotes as emphasis.

“Great, I just love it when people ask vague and somewhat threatening favors from us!” Dean sarcastically chimes, followed by a groan and him going back to drinking his beer from the stand next to the chair.

Sam just sighs and turns back to looking at the girl. Color starting to form back to her cheeks and her breathing even and almost relaxing Sam. “Well at least we know she can’t be someone bad.” Sam sighs again, reaching over and moving hair out of the girl’s hair.

Then all of a sudden the girl starts to groan and shift, startling all the boys into standing back up. She groans again, louder, as if she’s saying something.

“Crowley…” She mutters her hand trying to move up as if grabbing something. “Crowley!” She repeats, then as if something was there, her hand closes and goes back down. Then she relaxes again into her sleep as if nothing happened.

The boys just stare in shock at the girl, then at each other, then back at the girl.

“What did you say about her being bad?” mutters Dean.

Part 2 Coming soon!

#dean whinchester #sam whinchester #castiel #cas #cas x reader #reader x cas #castiel x reader #reader x castiel #supernatural #windows to the soul #series

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imsarabum · 8 years ago

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Responses to {Part 19} I Won’t Stop You // Jeon Jungkook, Vampire!AU Asks~

Please ‘Keep Reading’ to find my response to your ask ^^ As always, I have copied and pasted all asks into this post in regards to last night’s chapter to avoid clogging up people’s dashboards and to avoid spoilers for those who may still wish to read the chapter. Thank you ^^

@jynxy24 said: I CANNOT WAIT FOR YOONGI'S AND READER'S INTERACTION OMG THE ANGTS WILL BE COMING! Will there be gore tho? @-@

Although there wasn’t an interaction between Yoongi and the reader last night...there will be blood!

Anonymous said: I feel like Jungkook's mum will laugh at her saying 'its dracula'

It more so bothered her because it gave her an incline that the reader knows something or has a preconceived idea^^

Anonymous said: A small part of me hopes the series never ever end (even tho i am shit at suspense) because currently , tuesday is the highlight of my entire week

Well it won’t be ending soon! I can promise you that ^^ There is still a LOT to happen ^^ hehe, thank you so much my dear :)

Anonymous said: IT IS TUESDAY AND IM READY!!! I have my tissues just incase!! I also have some alcohol just incase 😐

Yay I hope you enjoyed the update! :D

Anonymous said: What to do when your crush lives your friend?:'-' I'll die. Anyway, sooo looking forward to tonight's chapter like omgggggggg in what time will u update?

I’m probably the worst person to ask for advice on that because I would just cry haha >< I always update between 9-10pm UK time ^^ I hope you enjoyed the update if you read it! Thank you so much :D

@kamcia12323 said: Omg can't wait for today's chapter. I have been waiting the whole week wanting to know what's lext! Thank you for the wonderful story, i have been following it from chapter 1 and love it. Hope you have a lovely evening.

I hope you enjoyed it if you got a chance to read it! Thank you for following since the beginning :) I hope you have a lovely evening/day too!

@pineapple-in-a-dress said: Im so excited for the new Junkook vampire au chapter, I love the story so damn much! it sucks so much that im in CET time, I'll think its time at 10pm but its 9pm at your place--

I hope you enjoyed the update if you read it! Thank you for loving it and staying up so late to read it! ^^

Anonymous said: Mom it's gonna be party lit af tonight with this update. Like my body is ready. I'm so excited 😊. I can't wait. DID YOU LIKE NOT TODAY? The video was so goooodd. And we best the record! I'm so excited. My albums are coming and it's just a BTS party this week. I'll be back later tonight with my thoughts on your lovely writings. ~LilKookie Anon

Litty titty party yay! haha I hope you enjoyed it Lilkookie :D And yes I LOVE Not Today! I’m listening to it right now actually ^^ I got my BTS albums yesterday and I got Jin and Hobi yay!!! Their cards are so cute :3 Both photos in the pink and blue albums are so wonderful, I’m really glad I got both now! (and yes - I have answered your second ask below so I hope you can find it!!)

Anonymous said: Omg life. I'm going out tonight and I won't be able to read I won't stop u until I get back. Pray for me. I don't have a lot of patience either. Luv ur work xx (and u xx)

Ahhh that’s okay you can always just catch up when you get home my love! I hope you enjoy it when you get a spare moment to read it, thank you and I love you too!

Anonymous said: Serrena has zero chill and I love her for it. Also Yoongi is my bias but honestly he might need some ice.😂 The only reason I can think of as to why Yoongi would need y/n is that he plans to turn random (or not so random) people and have her mature them quickly so he can make an army but I just remembered that he was surprised that Jimin was not a natum lamia anymore so he can't have known about that so I have no other theories😪

Ahh thank you so much for loving her character! *giggles* what an interesting theory though, I like that! muahaha~ Thank you for reading it and I hope it didn’t disappoint ^^

@omelys-space said: The new update was bomb ❤ Serrena is such a bad ass and I love her for it 😍😍😍 The way she handled Yoongi was gold I am so excited to see some more backstory on Jin, Hobi and especially Joonie as he seemed so different from the other two and what kind of human or whatever y/n is and how she will react upon hearing that her lover is a vampire Looking foreward to next week 😊 Thank you for your hard and amazing work ❤

Thank you so much for liking it and Serrena’s character! And yes, I really loved the way she handled Yoongi too - it truly was a silent battle haha ^^ In future chapters, there will be more backstory on the other Rogues, but it will go MORE in depth with Namjoon I suppose ^^ Those three are truly side-characters in this series, but Namjoon is the more dominant character of the three I think ^^ Thank you so much for reading and I hope you’ll enjoy the next one too!

@kookies-hoe said: ASDFGHJKLZXCVBNM DAYUM THAT CHAPTER MADE ME STAY AT THE EDGE OF MY SEAT, I LOVE YOUR WRITING SO MUCH!!!

I’m glad it kept you on the edge of your seat yay! Thank you so much for reading it, it means a lot to me! ^^

Anonymous said: MAMA SERENA FTW!! Also if Yoongi DOES know what I am (which I can't to find out next week hopefully), wouldn't he know ALL my powers, like how I turned Chimchim into a full vampire? And I love how Yoongi legit walked in there without a plan. XD ME

It appears that EVERYONE seems to know SOMETHING about her. The question is; are they all correct? Is each person missing a vital piece of information? Will Serrena be able to provide answers? Who knows :3 hehe AND HONESTLY SAME THAT’S SOMETHING I’D DO haha. He didn’t plan on the reader recognising him - that was the flaw in his plan. ^^ Thank you so much for reading it dear!

Anonymous said: How long are u gonna keep me waiting author nim?:( I need to know what she is!Your weiting gives me chills... I feel so frustrated I WANNA KNKWWWW

I will keep teasing you until you can’t take it any more ;D Hehe~~ Thank you for reading the new chapter!

@deangetoutofmyspleen said: it's tUESDAY I DABBED

*dabs with you*

Anonymous said: I FORGOT IT WAS A TUESDAY WOW HOW COULD I OMG OK I'M READY - silent anon

Hello silent Anon! I hope you enjoyed the chapter :3

@idilnuur said: OMG THE UPDATE KILLED ME!! KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK GIRL

Thank you so much my darling!

@jimiinie-cricket said: Hello! I just wanted to say that I've been having quite a hard time recently with stress, among many other things, and how much your Vampire Jungkook fic has helped me take my mind off of them. Once I found the first chapter I binged on everything you had published. Today was exceptionally difficult and I nearly started crying when I got home, but then I got a notif saying you updated!!!! I love this story & your writing. I get so excited for Tuesdays!! Keep up the magnificent work 💕💕

Ahh your message made me tear up a lot >< I’m feel so grateful to be able to provide a source of happiness for you in times that you feel that life is too much for you or things become a little too unbearable. I’m really sorry that you cried >< I wish I could give you a big hug and tell you that you are beautiful and everything will be alright ^^ Thank you for reading and thank you for sending me this message and remember that you are strong and you can accomplish anything. ^^

@noceurash said: I clicked on it as soon as the notification for I won't stop you popped up haha,, I'm excited for the next part!! Thank you for always updating!! I really enjoy your writing ily!! <3

Thank you so much for having notifs on and for reading the chapter my dear! You’re so welcome for the updates and I hope you enjoy the next chapter too :D I love you as well!

Anonymous said: SLAY SERRENA SLAY LOVE HER SO MUCH~ also hi mom how have you been? I hope you're not as stressed anymore *infinite amount of kisses* -panda anon

Truly the definition of ‘Slay Queen’ haha given the circumstances :D lolol Thank you panda anon - I’ve been ok ^^ Just continuing on with life and trying my best I suppose :D I hope you’re doing well too panda and thank you for reading the chapter :D

Anonymous said: Ok I'm finished! Absolutely amazing as usual 💝 and I'm so happy now that we're finally going to find out what the OC actually 'is'. Also that scene between Yoongi and Serrena was just fabulous 👌👌👌 and I love the way you're writing Namjoon so much wow 😄 thank you so much and I can't wait for next week !! - silent anon

Hello again silent anon! Thank you so much for loving the scene between Yoongi and Serrena, and for loving Namjoon’s character too! I’m happy to know that you liked the chapter and thank you so much for taking the time to read it! ^^

@koreaisanaddiction said: SARA OH MY GOD!!!! i though i knew what reader was but now im questioning! like fuck and now im really worried about namjoon!!!! like sara!!!! oh my God!!!!

Hehehe did I cause doubt for you? c: GOOD! ^^ And I know right? Poor Namjoon >< Altho, the thought of Namjoon calling Yoongi ‘master’ does things to me hahaha c: I’m dirty, sorry :P Thank you so much for reading lovely!

Anonymous said: Ohmaigawsh... Serrena in IWST part 19.... #momgoals... Usually, I'm a faithful jungkook stan, but gurl after this part, Namjoon's becoming a bias wrecker. That was beautiful. I hope you can hear my applause all the way from the US. <3

She is mum goals for sure! She actually reminds me a lot of my mum - that’s exactly her personality sometimes lol UH OH HIDE YOUR KIDS HDE YOUR WIFE NAMJOON’S COMING TO WRECK YAAA~ lolol ^^ Thank you so much my love, I’m really happy that you enjoyed the update ^^

@audreymv said: I am so freking like what?? Yoongi knows something and poor Namjoon, i hope he doesnt get hurt. Such a sweetheart. Dayumm Mom got sass, the queen i bow down to. Amazing as always. This is just too much and i love this so much. I hope we can see who (y/n) really is like what is the specialness. Gosh like i am getting answers but im not. Sara you are a art piece in itself

I think everyone thinks they know a little bit about her (as in, the characters in the story), but ultimately, they are all missing pieces of information. But with Serrena’s knowledge, hopefully she can set the record straight! As always, thank you so much for your amazing words, you really made me smile so much with that ^^ haha thank you for reading and I hope you’ll look forward to next week!

@mysr3 said: Saraaa!! what have you done! You just dragged me and left me hanging craving for more again! But this time the craving is so strong OMG! Breathtaking the whole chapter 19! Serrena is a badass Queen; Love Jungkook and Taehyung protectivness >< so heartwarming; Yoongi's smart ass character supposed to be hated but I just fell for it with a sympathy for him somehow ><, but tons of sympathy for Namjoon. Ahh so many feeling! Cant wait!! Sara well written and well detailed! Thank you Love ღღღ (cont.) PS Love the way you carried on the story even if it torture me to wait to know all the secrets. Its just so hard to guess or pin point what is the real reason behind the whole things. I just feel there will be big reveal of some sorts that will surprised everyone! Right??

I think there is an element of sadness for both Yoongi and Namjoon, because it’s kind of like the souls who lost their way a little? At least that’s what I feel sometimes ^^ And you’re 100% right! There will be a big reveal, but even at that - more will be revealed as time goes on because....well, you’ll see ;D hehe! Thank you so much for reading and I’m really happy you enjoyed it!

@fashionkilla124 said: Honestly Serrena is the most savage female vampire I have ever read about and I LOVE IT . I'm ready just to die and be revived for the next chapter because this is some next level shit going on and Im not ready . I had a stroke mid story and I had to collect myself. You are a really great writer and if you ever published a book and had a fan signing I would be first in line cuz yo stories be LITTT AF☺️☺️☺️😏👌😘😘

Ahhh thank you so much for loving her character! I’m sorry you experienced such health issues while reading hehe :P Thank you so much for your amazing compliments, they really make me smile and make me feel very happy ^^ Omg fan signing IN MY DREAMS lol but thank you for reading and I’m happy that you enjoyed the chapter :3

Anonymous said: AHHHH FUCK THIS CHAPTER WAS SO GOOD I'M CRYING???? SERENA IS AN ACTUAL BAD ASS OMG SHE'S ONE OF MY FAVE CHARACTERS NOW I LOVE IT SO MUCH GOOD JOB ON WRITING OMG

Ahhh thank you so much my dear!^^ I’m so happy that you love her character :3 Thank you for reading and enjoying it so much!!

@theninjachan said: Your updates for "I Won't Stop You" are always on time and the latest update was amazing as always. You are now my favorite Tumblr writer. 💘

Thank you so much for that, I feel honoured that you think that about me and I hope to continue making stuff that you find exciting and enjoyable to read my love ^^

@pandafish said: I loved the pettiness between Serrena and Yoongi! Poor Namjoon is an intelligent stuck with the wrong crowd :( I wonder if he'll be able to get away from Yoongi. Your Tuesday story updates always make me excited for Tuesdays! Like, I'll suddenly realize it's Tuesday which means IWSY update!!!

(I tried to tag you in this but I wasn’t able to, so I sent you a private answer as well in case you can’t see this!) Thank you for loving the petty scene between them both! And yes - the sympathy for Namjoon is real :c Thank you so much for reading the new chapter and I’m so happy that you get excited for Tuesdays!!

@jynxy24 said: SARA YOU ARE SO GREAT HONESTLY! IWSY was angsty bit it didn't make me feel mixed like I usually do😂😂 THE CHAPTER WAS GREAT LOVE KEEP IT UP PLEASEEEE :3 Stay Awesome, Sara😇😇

Awh thank you so much Jynxy :3 Thank you so much for reading and I’m glad you thought it was great! *hugs*

Anonymous said: When you wrote that Yoongi wanted the reader, like COMPLETELY, did you mean he also wanted to..."mate" with her too 😳 that is a really scary thought 😅 also will it be explained how yoongi knows about the reader and her abilities? Also, ALL HAIL SERRENA DAMN SHE IS THE QUEEN!!! So badass!

Hehe, you can take that whatever way you wish, but as with everything - all will be explained in due course! Everything will be revealed in time :3 And she is a badass queen! I wanna meet her in real life hehe =D Thank you so much for reading!

Anonymous said: GURLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL O. M. F. G. IM SO JUNGSHOOK. LIKE CAN SERRENA BE MY MOM? Like I'm so in love with her cuz she is the baddest bitch around. Omg. I'm shook. I love it. BUT THIS ANTICIPATION IS KILLING ME. MY LIL HEARTU 💜 Another wonderful chapter from a wonderful person. I love you. 💕 ~LilKookie Anon P.s. I have a routine dedicated to just this story. I wait until I'm in bed at 9 or 10 my time to make sure I can read uninterrupted can't have my mom talking while VampKook is stealin my 💜

She would make such a badass Mum! (well, she is in the story :P) hehe ^^I love you too lilKookie ^^ AWH YOUR ROUTINE IS SO CUTE c: And yes, we need as little distraction as possible to let VampKook make you Jungshook :3 lolol Thank you very much for reading it cutie ^^

@lostheretics said: to use her in wHAT WAAAYYY *silently cries, throwin myself into the fire* tbh queen Serrena is the best queen ever tho she's badass i love her<3<3 I CANT WAIT WHAT'S Y/N'S REAL IDENTITY? metaphorically i'm dying technically im dead while having a heart attack istg im waitin ily u da best bc u mixed up my feelings well<3

Nooo do not throw yourself into any fires! *pulls you back* hehe ^^ Thank you so much for reading and enjoying the chapter and I love you too! I’m glad I could mix your feelings up nice and good heh c:

@ananyak26 said: "Checkmate"xD ah.. Serena's sass nearly killed me! It was awesome!!!

Yes, checkmate indeed! She did a good job at roasting him lolol :3 Thank you so much my dear!

Anonymous said: tuesdays are my downfall thanks to you ㅇㅅㅇ thank you thank you thank you

Hopefully this downfall is a good thing! Hehe, thank you for reading my love ^^

@animeimmortal said: WHYYY DOES IT END LIKE THAT I WANT MOREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Because...it does :P YOU SHOULD KNOW ME BY NOW THIS ISN’T SURPRISING ANYMORE i’M AN ASSHOLE WHEN IT COMES TO THIS LOL c: ily tho ^^ :3

Anonymous said: It gets better and better lmao and Guess who's 1004% stanning got7 now 😏 -eggyook anon

Thank you for reading eggyook! AND YAY I’M SO HAPPY TO HEAR THIS! Thank you for stanning GOT7 now :3 ahh I’m smiling so much!

Anonymous said: Damn it Sara 😂 I thought you were finally going to reveal what y/n is and what yoongi wants with her LOL. Uggghhh gotta wait another week now 😖 STILL GREAT AS USUAL THO 💕💕💕 -7:45 anon

You thought wrong! You’ll just have to be a little more patient my dear :3 Hehe, thank you so much for reading and I hope you enjoyed it nonetheless!

Anonymous said: On a level of 0 to serrena how savage are you?

LITERALLY lol she has no chill whatsoever but hey, she’s the Queen. She can pretty much for whatever the heck she wants :P

@doubletroublesince1994 said: OMG WHY DO YOU ALWAYS LEAVE US WITH A CLIFFHANGER 😭😭😭😭😭

The chapter has to end at some stage! lolol Would you prefer it if I left the chapter off during some mid-sentence? xD It’s better to leave it on some kind of a cliff hanger to gauge curiosity and elicit desire for more ;) Hope you enjoyed it anyway! Thank you very much for reading :D

@aogintsu said: Omg. I completley forgot about tumblr for a while and youve reached chapter 20 already, i must read them all now

Ahhh welcome back lovely! And yes c: Chapter 20 will be out next week! :3 I hope you will have fun while catching up on the story! :3

@rachelsmusicallife said: I completely binged "I Won't Stop You" last night until 5am. And it was just so amazing I had to tell you. Your writing a so beautifully done, some parts honestly make me wanna cry. It is so well written and gripping it amazes me. Keep going girl. I look forward to so much more 😊

Ahh I’m so happy that you’re enjoying it! I’m so happy that you think it’s beautifully written, that makes me so incredibly happy and you made me smile a lot. I hope you’ll enjoy the future chapters and thank you very much for reading it and messaging me to let me know ^^ I hope you have a great day!

#I Won't Stop You #IWSY #Responses #Asks #imsarabum

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theroadtorestoration-blog · 8 years ago

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5/26/2017 I would like to hold myself accountable in some way, so I'm going to start posting. Today I binged. These past few weeks have consisted of more binges than these past few months and it's scaring me. I started meeting with my therapist because of this and because of an ample amount of free time. I believe this amount of free time is causing me to think FAR too much about "fixing" myself, which is why I end up bingeing. My breakfasts and lunches have been satisfactory in the eyes of a girl on a weight loss journey, but if you ask my therapist, they are considered restrictive. Anyways, I'm going to be posting before, during, and after binges from now on in order to get a clearer sense of some of the reasons behind WHY I keep falling down this path. I'd really like to make this summer a time for myself to get closer to overcoming this battle of one and I believe the first step is being honest. So, here I am. Post-binge & post-purge as I walk the Weber Center track. My goal for the night is to reach 20,000 steps. Is this overexercise? Probably, but the highly irrational side of my brain is okay with that because... well.. whatever leads to weight loss. While I'm here, I guess I'll say how my day went and maybe I'll discover some potential triggers. 8:00- woke up and showered. I put on a cute outfit but I changed into a more comfortable one that made me feel really bad about my body. I changed bc I thought I'd get cold at graduation rehearsal. I even put on lipstick and earrings! Probably bc I wanted to impress my boo thang 8:15- I had my ACV and then I ate breakfast. I make myself drink this before breakfast bc I believe it's the magic waste loss cure. I wanted some protein so I started out with a strawberry Greek yogurt. I then made some oatmeal and had that as my starch instead of granola because for some reason I thought eating oatmeal would keep me from binging today ??? Who knows. My logic is skewed. I put 1 tbsp of protein in it bc I thought more protein = fuller tummy = lower chance of bingeing. I then had a disgusting overcooked hard boiled egg. My reflux of that was SICKENING. I had a strawberry too. I really wanted to binge but I left.... 8:35- supposed to be at graduation rehearsal @ 9. There was a breakfast from 8-9 that I skipped bc HA. when's the last time I've ever gone to a provided breakfast??? The idea of putting one of those bagels in my system makes me wanna barf. Disgusting carbs. 8:44- I arrive at niles North. I don't wanna see these people. Ugh. I wanna hide myself. I don't wanna walk in front of that crowd and get body shamed. I wanna see vaughn but I don't want him to see me. If I cross my arms over my belly maybe my body will turn invisible. 9:00- the gym is filled with pastries and bagels. Yuck. How does everyone just eat all of that stuff so carelessly? 9:05- the rehearsal is fine and long and I just wanna go and get on with my day. I'm so sick of this place and I hate all of this small talk. I see Uche and vaughn talking. Blah. I see tiselle. I think she hates me. Do I owe her an apology? Vaughn and I aren't even really dating. We've basically just hooked up and had some sleepovers. 9:40- omg there was this thing we had to do when we went to our seats and the person directly across from you in the parallel line would sit at the same time as you and vaughn and I were parallel! Love those coincidences. Also during the ceremony I sat behind manduul. He makes me uncomfortable. I also sat behind Nathan, vaughns friend, and I felt very judged. Am I too much for people? 10:00- I'm free! I zoom toward the exit and to the door and jump into my car. I don't wanna talk to anyone. I head to old navy and call dad. I tell him to meet me there. 10:15- I begin shopping. I enjoy shopping but it can be tough. I like my body now more than I used to, but I've still got some improvements to make. Im really proud of my exercise efforts though. I've been so consistent!!! I can't wait to continue on this fitness journey and to get a better grip on this healthy lifestyle. 1:00- omg, I'm finally done shopping. I can't believe I spent $270 on clothes...... holy shit. I've never done that before. It was my dads money and he was happy to do it but damn. I feel so spoiled. do I even deserve all of this stuff? Probably not. Ugh I'm so privileged it makes me sick. 1:05- dad was gross and flirty with cashier and I really don't wanna be around him but I have a salad at his house I was gonna eat for lunch so I head there and he follows right behind me in his car!!! Oy. 1:15- I eat a green salad from Trader Joe's. It has a lot of fat in it (27 g) but not a lot of protein (14 g) so I'm freaking out and worried about a later binge. Should I have that salmon in there or is it too much? The meal is only 370 calories. Do I need more? Dad comes and eats both of the small containers with salmon. He says it's okay to eat that much bc he worked out!!!! He keeps saying shit like that. It's so triggering. He says it as if you need to earn the right to eat which is such a disordered way of thinking. Is my whole family disordered? Oy vey. 1:30- I try and speed through lunch because this man is driving me insane. I say I'm gonna go to moms house and clean. I end up going upstairs until 2 and I just laid down and looked up things for vaughn and I to do tonight. Couldn't find anything. 2:05- I head to moms house. I grab 2 pieces of gum from dads fridge bc I think it'll rid of the urge to binge. It does for a while. I continue cleaning up and getting rid of stuff at moms while I listen to music. Not aware of the time. I take a break at some point. I head to the fridge and I get a chicken breast from jewel. I heat it up. My favorite part is the fatty skin. Is that completely disgusting? Probably. I'm proud of myself bc I eat it at a controlled pace which is new for me. I also have 3 pieces of shrimp. I'm upset with myself bc I'm watching a movie as I eat it. The love is called Blue is the Warmest Color. It's about lesbians. I question my sexuality for the thousandth time. I see that Jacob (my Ex boyfriends) new friend group posts a picture of themselves with a couch. Why are they mocking my friend group? Whatever! I also make myself a French vanilla cappuccino and I crave some shortbread cookies but I don't let myself. I tell myself to wait it out and let the craving pass because I know I'm not actually hungry. I stop watching the movie at this point and I return to cleaning. I have short text conversation with Spencer about vaughn and then about dammy. I realized that I'm not sure if I really trust vaughn and the relationship I currently have with him is kinda strange and I'm not sure how much I really wanna pursuit it. I really enjoy him though. He's so intelligent and makes great convo. At some point, I make my way to the kitchen again and I let myself have a ton of chocolate. I reach for the box of Fannie may chocolates that I discovered a few days back and rip through half of that, I love the chocolates with raspberry centers. I then reach for a box of European chocolates and they are expired and dusty looking. Yuck. I then eat some m&ms and chocolate squares and it's out of hand. I even have some more maple cookies and I heat up a handheld apple pie from Krispy cream. I heat up a butternut squash ravioli and vegetables lean cuisine and I devour it. I want more pasta. More carbs. I find another pasta dish in the freezer, I heat it, and it's gross. I put it in a container and throw it in the fridge. Wonder what my mom will think about all of the containers and food wrappers in the garbage. I hope she doesn't question me about it. I then have 2 spinach pie triangles and heat them in panini maker. Not very good. Then I make a quesadilla with 2 tortillas and a ton of cheese. I eat that by the tv. I then make another one even though I'm beginning to feel sick. This is the last thing I eat. I drink some water out a wine glass and I'm mad at myself. Go figure. This always ends up happening. I'm not sure I'll ever learn. I go to the bathroom and lay down and I'm in so much pain. I try spitting up my food. Oh yeah, just to mention I was spitting up some of my chocolate earlier on and I did this by running around and drinking water. Anyways, after My binge I'm in the bathroom trying to throw up and my phone is dying so I grab the extension cord thingy and I bring it to the bathroom downstairs bc I enjoy purging into that Toilet better and I charge my phone as I spit food up. Not too much comes up. I watch a video about what to do after a binge. It's not too helpful. I do hear AGAIN that I need to not restrict after a binge. This is so hard to learn bc I always have events coming up. I'm not trying to look like a fat ass at graduation or on birthright!!! 7:20- I decide to head to Weber center to walk. It's raining outside but I need to do something and I don't wanna be with other people. lol I never wanna be with other people. I'm too ashamed of myself. I set a goal for myself to walk 20,000 steps and I compete with everyone walking. Well, that's my day so far. If anything drastic ends up happening, I'll update you in tomorrow's post. Until then, keep on fighting. You are not your illness and I have no doubt that you'll eventually beat this. I love you, rach. Signing off.

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