#anyway i'm going to cry myself to sleep

[himbohotel]

what does your heart look like?

a cage with iron locks

You are an enigma. You take care to remain that way. You aim to keep people guessing; your motives are uncertain even to yourself. What is it you truly want? You'll never know if you keep your heart locked away like that. You deserve to be known, truly and fully. Stop being afraid of what you might find if you open your heart up to self-reflection. Stop thinking that no one will love you the moment they understand you. You are more than the facade you put on.

a bird struggling to get loose

Your heart can never hold still. It pounds against your chest frantically, always turning your sights to one thing after the next. When was the last time you were certain? The last time your life was stable? Maybe this is how you prefer things. One the move constantly, not tied down to one person or place. You chase one goal after the next. Can you ever really feel complete without a place to land? Shouldn't you build yourself a nest?

tagged by: @mecwmellc tagging: you <3

[devildarlindumbass]

Mhm

[deoidesign]

.

[cazssserole]

(spoilers)

Why why why why why why why why why

[animalpetcel]

Hey! AK EN translated the Arturia manga! I think some of these are the panels that spoke out to me

When she used her magic on her parents, esp the contrast between it. The first encounter with her mother even establishes that Arturia, with a somewhat childlike yet well-meaning understanding of the difficult situation her mother is in emotionally and decides that if her mother can do what makes her happy, that is what is most important, even if it lead to her death.

And for her father, it shows how it could look to an outsider someone who knows what her power is and fears what they would do if no longer held together by their inhibitions and society. It is obviously a terrifying thought and rejecting it is the logical(?) course of action.

Everything unfettered is not always kind and it is not always cruel. It breaks the social contract everyone agrees to follow in order to live but it is not something that I think is a purely evil action because we all know how the social contract can put the same people it exists to help into horrible binds.

Also Executor explains her motivations better then me:

she's like, an emotional hedonist whose somewhat childish beliefs would always lead to chaos bc society would never work if people just said what they felt and did what they liked but she's not pursuing this out of some malice for the world or a desire to see people succumb to chaos or pain, at least imo.

[my-mind-is-afk-rn]

Man thinking about old alters is kinda weird cause I'm sitting here like "oh I wonder what [x] would think of where I am now" and then I'm like. Oh wait, that's me. That's not some mystical spirit that was just in my life for 8 years of my childhood, that was a phase of mine that I had back in elementary/middle school, except I was having like 40 of them at once and they were all different, and now that we're fused together again, I remember every path of this life like it was the original, but at the same time I remember interactinf with... each other.. and..... now I just have like 40x the memories except I don't and.. uh... anyway what *would* [x] think of me now, well honestly i have NO idea because their life "ended" before I got a grasp of our sense of self... and that was the whole point of doing that..... and I keep forgetting that I was just... Like That for so long. Anyone get what I'm saying? (I need sleep)

[talkorsomething]

I have Got to get more transgender

[help-me-find-a-name-please-lol]

i have depriving myself down to an art form

[youremyonlyhope]

why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up why won't my brain shut up

[philomelas-tongue-says]

made it a whole five weeks into the quarter before having my first phd-related mental breakdown

[tarmac-rat]

Hey hey I need to uuh hum fight you at the back of a Denny's or something over those tags on my cyberpunk post lile wtf? That's such a good analysis of his character I love your work a lot in general but this is doing me in I'm gonna cry, you're so fucking right about this dumb broken man 🥺😠

I will not fight you I will bake you a cake and give you a kiss because you're very sweet I appreciate your kindness 😘

I really love your perspective on Johnny's disabilities and addictions impacting how he sees and interacts with the world-- as someone who herself isn't disabled I tend to overlook the way people view the world through that lens and as a result have realized that I haven't touched upon it much in my own analysis of Cyberpunk, and your insight really was spot-on and spoke to me in a way I hadn't considered before.

I talk a lot about the themes and meta of the game but Pondsmith himself came out and said, like, before the game came out that Johnny is not the hero of the story. He THINKS he's the hero of the story but the way people and even himself idolize him and his actions are in many ways his biggest shortcoming. Johnny is addicted to the image of himself, much like he's addicted to his vices and addicted to his cause. He needs his anchors no matter how detrimental they are to him, but in many respects those anchors were never his choice. Now he's stuck in his place, dug in and unable to move, and that's the way he dies. Alone, unmoored, and stuck in his ways.

He's a very tragic and even empathetic character-- I do understand why he does the things he does and feel for him when he suffers tragedies-- but treating him as a hero of this story is wrong, in my opinion. He's a disabled, traumatized war veteran who was set up in life to fail at a very early age. His flaws are of his own making. They are not of his own design.

[miallurk]

In these days i realized i like art and writing and creating and shopping and taking walks and talking to people and cleaning and helping and studying and doing things but i'm just. too stressed, tired and burned out to do them. How great!

[roger-elizabeth-debris]

so uh, yeah, guess I'm starting estrogen 😵‍💫

[madeimpact]

Younger Noct: I'd rather warp directly into the ocean than be sincere about my feelings

The Crystal business meeting with Bahamut: hi

Noct:

Noct: Never mind I need these guys to know how much I love them and I need them to know right fucking now.

[iero]

Let it be known that one of my absolute worst flaws is I am a huge, HUGE homebody... At 29 years old... 

[sensitivegoblin]

Damn I need to get teased within an inch of my life so that the stress can leak out of me please