#anyway i wanted to share the pain
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I was going to joke about "how the hell does sending Gale off to get railed get Halsin approval" but I accidentally took an incredibly cursed screenshot and I don't know what the point of this post is anymore
#anyway i wanted to share the pain#baldur's gate 3#the drow twins are a touch buggy; sometimes they'll reject the origin characters but sometimes not and i don't know why?#'you can't take what we're dishing out' sir that is lae'zel#bg3
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fuck it friday
tagged by @tizniz @bidisasterevankinard @kirkaut 💖
more of the leg pain fic! still not sure I wrote everything the way I want in this snippet, but it's the general idea, future me will deal with whatever I don't like when editing lol
prev snippet
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“It’s really nothing to worry about,” he whispers, eyes locked on Tommy’s. For some reason it’s just- it’s not easy to say it, to admit he’s hurting, and to accept the inevitable love and care he knows Tommy’s about to shower him in. He loves it, he loves Tommy, but there’s something about letting people take care of him while he’s in pain that just feels almost too vulnerable. But it’s Tommy, and Buck wants Tommy to know him. And a part of him wants to let his boyfriend fuss over him and take care of him, at least let him bring him some painkillers from downstairs, because he’s dreading going down all those stairs while his leg is in a state of constant throbbing pain, which turns sharp and stabbing whenever he moves. But then there’s the other part of him, the stubborn part that wants to manage everything on his own, that feels like a burden, like he’s asking for too much, being too much, and he can do it all on his own, he really can. But, well, it’s Tommy. Buck doesn’t need to feel like this with him, doesn’t need to prove anything. He can be vulnerable and needy, and he can be as Buck as he can, and Tommy will never mind – he’ll love it, actually. Sometimes it’s hard to remember that Tommy is so loving and supportive, and Buck can be just unapologetically himself, and that he can actually lean on him.
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no pressure tags (lmk if you wanna be added or removed): @shortsighted-owl @eddiebabygirldiaz @watchyourbuck @loserdiaz @ladydorian05 @diazpatcher @monsterrae1 @spagheddiediaz @rainbow-nerdss @epicbuddieficrecs @pirrusstuff @bucks-daddy-issues @rogerzsteven @giddyupbuck @honestlydarkprincess @911-on-abc @jesuisici33 @steadfastsaturnsrings @buddieswhvre @fortheloveofbuddie @daffi-990 @aroeddiediaz @thewolvesof1998 @exhuastedpigeon @underwaterninja13 @hippolotamus @your-catfish-friend @loveyouanyway @theotherbuckley @diazsdimples @kinard-buckley @evansboyfriend @bucked-it-up @spotsandsocks @hoodie-buck @weewootruck @strandfirefly @41noodlesoups
#fuck it friday#wikiangela writes#bucktommy leg pain fic#aka the one where I project my shit onto buck (again lol he's just so easy to do that)#fic snippet#my writing#my wips#911 fic#911 abc#bucktommy#tommy kinard#evan buckley#buck x tommy#bucktommy fic#firepilot#tevan#fireflight#kinley#this week was exhausting and i barely wrote but wanted to share smth anyway lol#i need like a whole day to spend in bed pls im soooo tired#finally not a new wip tho lol
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i have nothing new i want to share... have a wallpaper...
[ID: A drawing of Satoru, Shoko, and Suguru from Jujutsu Kaisen. Suguru and Satoru have their arms slung around Shoko’s shoulders, who smiles around a cigarette in her mouth and whose hands are in her pockets. Suguru, on Shoko’s right, makes a three-fingered peace sign with his right hand and leans slightly down. Satoru has his legs crossed and his left arm up in a fist, mouth open in a smile. In hiragana written above them is Sashisu! (さしす). ]
#posting is honestly such a pain which is a shame cause i have so much takayuki shit ive drawn that i desperately want to share#and yet the horrors prevent me from doing so.. if only someone could do it for me i hate drawing#anyway dont expect too much from me i spent four days and nights on my art final if i have to draw anymore ill explode#insert are things never easy sasuke gif#anywayzzzzz at least one of you use this as a wallpaper or ill be embarrassed forever </3#sashisu#geto suguru#gojo satoru#ieiri shoko#shoko ieiri#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#hanancouldyounot#hanancouldyoudraw
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hm. i apparently have an unpopular opinion about yona’s decision during her conversation with hiryuu…… like. obviously she’s motivated by the desire to save her friends—she loves them and cares about them deeply and is scared of losing them—and there’s some selfishness in that (on a more facetious note though, god forbid teenage girls do anything i guess…). but the interpretation of her decision as selfish to the point of cruelty and/or naïveté just doesn’t sit right with me. like there is no solution to the conundrum she was presented with that doesn’t involve tragedy. and i’m never, ever letting anyone forget that jaeha, gija, and sinha were never given a choice regarding zeno’s whole murder-suicide plan, and they don’t regret being alive, so wouldn’t changing the past and effectively erasing them from existence (when they already have no agency atm!!!!) be so much more cruel? wouldn’t discarding two millennia worth of lives, regardless of how painful they’d been, be so much more cruel? does a life lived not matter because there was suffering?
and yona values life, even when it hurts, so she was never gonna make a different choice, and i just don't think that that's extremely selfish or naïve of her; the dragon warriors are not just vessels for the gods, they're people, and they don't deserve to be erased because the gods don't care about the pain they cause, and she can't confront the gods in the dream realm, she has to do it in her present which can't exist if she changes it! (also on a purely narrative level, any other choice would've basically rendered 40+ volumes of the story pointless.) and besides, it's more interesting to focus on trying to make things better rather than rewriting the past, and she'll have to sacrifice something to save everyone (the part of her that's a reincarnation of hiryuu, obviously, and possibly something more) which will even things out anyway.
#also As A Disabled Person i find the idea of erasing others' lives (without their permission!) because they were painful to be Terrifying#and if the disability angle seems totally unrelated the author's note in ch 116 states that the dragon warriors have generally been sickly#(historical fantasy code for disabled)#also it's disability pride month and i can do what i want <3#anyway this makes sense To Me but i also sustained a Head Injury at work today so if it's actually incoherent ignore me#akayona#this isn't a response to any specific post btw i just keep seeing this point discussed and i felt compelled to share my two cents#now that i've swung my trusty bat at the hornets nest i can write my silly little fic in peace 😌
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(Don't Fear) The Reaper
#criminal minds#the reaper#george foyet#my art#anyway ✨ crumbs ✨#i made this like a year ago#but wasn't happy with it so i never posted#but today i have a massive headache and i wanted to share a little something to relieve the pain#also my heart's in shambles#there's that too#i wanna distract myself from everything
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Loitering after school like they don't have 5 homeworks due tomorrow 🥴🥴🥴
#*sigh* i missed drawing 😔😔😔#anyway hhh i kinda prefer without the bg maybe because it just looks clearer to me#but this was fun to paint akdjekaoqljdoqd I just want them to hang out and like air out all of their frustration in their life#like since both of them are orphans I know they both just shares the same pain and frustrations with the home they lived in#i like to think of kotone living with a chill but promiscuous aunt so most of her grievance is her dealing with her aunt and her men talk#-and of course seeing her bringing different men back home#and shinji living with a foster family that clearly brings him in just for the money so he has to take part time jobs for school money#i swear i need to sit down and actually think about their backstory in this au akdjdksiapa helpspslsks#asukart#00s highschool au#persona 3#persona 3 reload#persona 3 portable#shinjiham#shinjiro aragaki#kotone shiomi#minako arisato#persona 3 femc#foolmoon
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hi everyone <3
I have a bit of a life update. To make a long story short, last week I was diagnosed with PTSD. I have been having a... very hard time coming to terms with that. For most of my life I believed I just had a bad anxiety disorder, but I am now realizing that is unfortunately not the case. The past couple months I have been in a near constant state of fight or flight, fear, panic, whatever you want to call it- without really realizing it. and man. it has been exhausting, mentally, physically, spiritually. I just thought it was normal to feel like this all the time. i assumed everyone felt like this. my therapist has helped me realize I am in a lot of pain right now and it is not normal. so. the good news is that there is an intensive trauma therapy that I will be doing for the next couple months that is going to really help me recover. i love and trust my therapist with my whole heart. there is a light at the end of the tunnel. i am finally getting the help i need. so. unfortunately I am going to step away from tumblr for a bit. i dont really want to do this, i love being on here. i love interacting with all the friends i've made here. kink has become a very important and healing part of my life. but it is just a little too much for me at the moment. I'm not sure when I will return, could be a couple weeks, a couple months. I'll return when I feel right. I feel like this may be a little odd to share here, but it's important to me to acknowledge and share that I have been having a really hard time. i tend to downplay when i'm in pain. i feel like people usually don't care about me (i know this is very very much not the case. im trying to convince my brain of that too.) its really hard for me to tell people when i am struggling, especially in my real life. so i am taking baby steps and starting here. so, until I return- chase your tails for me, roll in the grass, bark at the squirrels. take care of yourselves. if you are struggling, know youre loved. get the help you need. i will be curling up in my dog bed and taking a nap in the sun. ruff ruff. wag wag. much love to all of you.
#agh personal posts. i know this is mainly a dogboy kink blog and some people will not care. but this is my blog and i will share what i want#i am safe and okay. i am just.. struggling to accept that i am very very sick right now. i was raised to just push that shit way down.#im done doing that. i am going to have to feel all the pain to heal it. nervous but excited. ready but hesitant.#anyways. hi. i love what this blog has done for me. for what this community has done for me. i will be back. you cant get rid of me!#will be keeping an eye out for messages for the next couple days. but this post is mainly to give myself permission to take a step back.#its weird. i feel obligated to post here and am feeling guilty for putting myself first. but thats the trauma i guess!#anyways anyways anyways. if youve read all of this i love you. thank you for listening. see you soon.#jasperbarks
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I’m a trans man that recently got diagnosed with hyper mobile eds, so now seeing Steve makes me extra happy, because cool disabled ftm rep. Thanks for making the radical dude bro, he’s funky.
same disability (waving hand emoji)
Always extremely fulfilling to know my work makes people happy in some small way, it means a lot. Thank you for sharing with me
#I dont talk about having eds cause its not specifically really relevant to my work#been diagnosed with it since 17. woag 10 years next april...#anyways. yeah idk I like the blog to be about my art and I'm used to people asking me a LOT of questions about EDS or disability or canes#just a lot of stuff unrelated to my art. I'm happy to talk about it but I don't want it to be the focus of my blog!#So I've p much chosen to mostly just. not talk about it. even though I'm literally fine talking about it#it's just rarely relevant and no one needs to know LOL#but. I also know that EDS can feel very lonely#and that it's really nice to know other people out there have it#so. hi anon you're not alone#also just in case. literally don't feel bad about anything in the tags here LOL#mostly just like 'please people do not start sending me asks about whether or not you should go to the doctor'#or asks about ableist family members#or venting about pain...#just a lot of invasive and boundary crossing asks the more I talk about it hahahah#but I don't mind sharing at all.#sorry I think I lost the plot on this one#good luck on your journey. starting to accomodate yourself does wonders#and really just extremely happy my work could reach you in this way#sending you love#asks#anon
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the character designers back in the day probably: snakes are cool. lets put some snakes on spectra's design. kids like snakes right? yeah? hell yeah lets add more snakes. we can even name helios viper helios that sounds cool as fuck. hell yeah ppl are gonna love this guy.
my fuckass brain in the shower while im trying to focus on shaving my face: hey what if the snakes are meant to represent ouroboros?? how getting rid of one power hungry lunatic still leaves a void that allows another to take their place in an endless loop??? WAIT HOW ABOUT THE SERPENT AND THE APPLE INSTEAD????? forbidden knowledge except instead of that knowledge being how to be human, its how to ascend above it in the most destructive way possible. spectra thinks he's above god but he's really eve falling for the temptation of the apple
me cutting my face twice trying to shave: girl it is a show aimed towards preteens can we pleASE FOCUS-
#I AM IN UNIMAGINABLE AMOUNTS OF PAIN RN#anyway thats my shower thoughts#why do i have to shave my face i was born a GIRL why do i have a MOUSTACHE i dont take TESTOSTERONE#anyway my brain isnt thinking this shit up for me to just not share it#if one wishes to judge me for analyzing WAY too hard into character designs that are just supposed to look cool then go ahead#i am also judging myself dw#no hate to eve from the bible btw love u girliepop thank u for making me human#im not even religious. i just wanted to apologize to eve just in case.
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So I have word problems sometimes where I temporarily lose all access to the words I am going for but I am good at word games so usually I can work around it, but sometimes a Wrong Phrase comes out of my mouth before I can catch it The other day I was talking about getting a new mattress so I stop somehow injuring myself in my sleep, but what I said was "so my bones stop trying to escape" I then tried to correct it, but said "not escape, migrate" which was not much better lol
#the person behind the yarn#sometimes my brain just doesn't words!#idk if that's a 'it happens to everybody' thing or a POTS brain fog thing#or a whatever-autoimmune-issue-I-have brain for thing or a had-too-many-concussions thing#or heck. might be an ADHD thing. I might have ADHD? or is it ADD. I can never keep the acronyms straight#anyway point is: words! sometimes they don't work right for me!#the phrase 'so my bones stop trying to escape' just made me laugh so I wanted to share it#I don't even think my bones are the issue!#like. I have a bones issue in that my ribs hate me#but when I messed up all my muscles this week my ribs were totally fine#well if I moved the wrong way the knot under my shoulderblade pushed on them#which was unpleasant but not the 'oh no my ribs' bone issue pain
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i hope i am not just your average dc enjoyer to you but also your favorite timbern poster
#im like if a tim stan didn't like tim#tim got a boyfriend and i was like 'move over loser! who is /that/?'#my favorite batfam member is damian wayne/duke thomas if we're being honest#and if we're talking outside the batfam i really like hal jordan#smth about him.... i want to study him like a bug#but bernard dowd and jay nakamura my beloved#idc if they give tim and jon other male love interests. you will always be my endgame#anyway#timbern is sooo special to me simply bc of tim and bear's shared history#what do you mean they knew each other#what do you mean they went through smth traumatic and fell out of touch#what to you mean tim finally knows what he wants for once????#wailing#also what do you mean bernard dowd has been in some really concerning situations for a civvie???#a school shooting and a pain cult survivor and and got kidnapped by some twobit villain and but next to a bomb and his parnets dont like hi#jfc#this kid is fighting for his life#dc#bernard dowd#introspective.txt#timbern#jayjon one day i will be able to make a post that encapsulates how much i love you
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current editing moodboard, please send help
#perfectionism is really kicking my butt rn#that and the fact i had like a week away from writing properly bc chronic pain and now i can’t get back into the headspace#so yeah#perfectionism and brain fog#the inimitable duo#and i know i just need to be patient because it’ll get in the end there like it always does#but rn i’ve spent two nights in a row trying to polish up the last bits of this chapter#and i still just feel so detached from it all i want to pitch my laptop out the window#but i can’t afford a new laptop each time i want to defenestrate it#so this little rant will have to do instead#UGH#it’s so annoying because i am actually so so proud of this chapter and have loved writing it and can’t wait to share it#it’s just this last little bit that i seem to be hitting a brick wall with#anyway sorry#four walls readers don't worry i go through this just about every chapter lol#i'm just feeling it particularly this time because it's a particularly big chapter (both in terms of length and content)#and sometimes venting in the tags and creating an alex moodboard is very therapeutic#writing stuff#alex turner#writer's block#lulu posts
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Sticks
#disability#disability memes#stickers#sticker club#april showers#cute#animals#chronic pain#ADHD#adhd memes#neurodivergent#I don’t know just wanted to share them#I’m hyped that the holographic ones seem to be water proof#properly#which is cool#anyway#Sticker Club stuff
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Me: i'm gonna write an au
My brain gremlin: cool! what kind?
Me: *something VERY popular and overdone*
Gremlin: wow real original
Me: ...
Me: fuck you i'm gonna do it anyways
#so anyways im wrting a shared pain/empath steddie soulmates au#really wanted to do Eddie pov for starcourt and then accidentally wrote a fic about it#and ive been fighting myself about it since i started - fucking brain gremlin#steddie fic idea#personal#queenie's wips
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good morning
#eddie brock#venom#i did this. yesterday so i (maybe?) saved it But its an excuse for me to talk about my eddie cooking headcanons#Of which there are few that include He doesnt suck so bad at it but working up the energy to do it 99% of the time is like shooting himself#so this is absolutely soul rending for him. but i think he can make a Decent Autism Meal. like huge batch of rice for example#depression meals are a staple etc. we know about the tater tots#i just think its funny. anyway. i wanted to share my pain. shout out to bitches who suck at cooking bc they have adhd#scart
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gale voice here feel the pulse of the magic in my heart that will eventually be the end of me. im on my knees before you like an animal showing its belly. im in excrutiating pain bc of the contact with the magic in my heart but please dont take your hand away please dont stop touching me
#gale of waterdeep#paydja plays baldur's gate#the relationship a lot of the companions have with their bodies is fucking fascinating#but gale and karlach's relation to their heart and to human contact is particularly compelling#i cant say who has it worse bc thats a stupid comparison to make when they both have hearts that could literally detonate at any moment#[ik that karlach cant do human contact at all and gale cant but im talking abt emotionally significant contact which is smth they share]#but rn im focusing on gale ill talk abt karlach later#hes so interesting like hes initially played as arrogant but i think that whole thing with mystra#really fucked him up bc he talks abt himself like hes. not a means to an end per se but u get the gist#you can see the way he talks abt sense and sensuality and emotional connection but as soon as you actually offer it via flirting or just#genuine compliments hes always surprised and always changes the subject#partially out of like. emotiona damage and partially bc he doesnt want to go boom#ANYWAY WHAT IM SAYING IS hes in pain bc of the contact being made with the magic that makes up his heart but#by god please dont take your hand away. please dont stop touching him. please#i hate this fucking game i hate it so much#chattering#sorry for the analysis it WILL happen again#im talking abt gale rn bc hes my favourite and currently the character i know the most about via gameplay#but there is PLENTY i can say abt everyone#god i keep saying this but its like why are you so good sometimes and also so bad. fucking Larian.
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