#anyway i love molly and i have super complicated feelings about what they did to karen’s character | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

jasntodds · 1 year ago

Text

Petrichor [16]

Pairing: Jason Todd x Fem!Powered!Reader (little bit of fwb)

Words: 13,749

Chapter Warnings: Swearing, angst, fluff, blood, gunshot wound, a little bit of gore, mentions of death, panic attacks, hurt/comfort

Summary: ❝Pylades: I’ll take care of you. Orestes: It’s rotten work. Pylades: Not to me. Not if it’s you.❞

Gotham is home, not just for Jason but for you, too. And now that you’re both finally back home, together, you’re ready to see where this next chapter brings the two of you. He’s your best friend and you’re his. And you both might want a little something more with being back home, the place you both feel most comfortable. Surely, nothing could possibly go wrong now.

A/N: Hey!! lmao so sorry for the super late update. I was sick and then some personal stuff happened and then I thought I got covid so yeah hi lol I'm so sorry lol This chapter was like 20k+ words so I split it into two because that was a lot lol You can add yourself to the tag list below, ask me to be tagged, or you can follow my library blog @jasntoddslibrary and turn on notifications if you prefer that!! I love feedback, I swear it keeps me posting on a weekly basis 😭

series masterlist | masterlist | tag list

Jason is stuck pacing back and forth in the room he’s calling a bedroom now. Worry has taken every part of him as his hand grips his phone like a vice. It’s been hours. He hasn’t heard from you or Dick or Gar. He hasn’t heard from anyone and he’s tried calling you seven times. But, your phone is off and your phone is never off. That is the one thing about you, your phone will never be off unless there is a reason for it and being hurt isn’t a good reason. Not to you. The only time your phone even dies is…never. Jason thinks about it and he doesn’t think you’ve let your phone even reach 20% in the entire time you’ve known each other. He thinks it’s probably so someone can always find you and you can always call for help because you’re almost paranoid about it dying. Your phone doesn’t die.

That leaves Jason thinking the worst of the worst. If your phone is off, that means it has to be dead or you shut it off for some reason but that’s uncharacteristic of you. So, he thinks maybe it did die and if it died, that’s because you didn’t charge it. If you didn’t charge your phone, it’s because you were physically incapable of charging it. What if something really bad happened? What if you were shot somewhere else? Jason knows Crane wanted you taken care of, maybe he shot you twice but you’re really good at hiding your pain when you need to. Adrenaline probably kicked in and shock, you were scared for Tim. Maybe you didn’t realize how bad it was. What if there was a complication of some sort and something bad happened?

Jason’s mouth starts to water as his eyes burn. His brows pinch together hard as his teeth grind so hard his jaw starts to ache. He was brought back. But, a part of him really hates that he was. Would you want to be brought back? If you died, would you want to be brought back like him? Jason comes to a stop, trying to steady his own breathing as his leg aches and burns. The scars on his chest feel like he’s being cut open again. What if you don’t want to be brought back but Jason did anyway? What if you did, and he does nothing?

What if you did die?

If you did die…Gar would call him, right?

Gar would definitely call, Jason assures himself. Gar would call immediately if something were happening. He has the number now and Jason’s ringer is on with the vibration set to strong. He has no missed calls but he’s certain Gar would call. If not, he would have called Molly and Molly would have found a way to call Jason. If you were dead, one of them would call him.

And then Jason swallows his own heartbeat as his phone starts ringing.

Gar.

“Hey.” Jason clears his throat, trying to keep himself together as he tries to prepare himself for the worst news he’ll ever get.

“Is she there?” Gar asks and Jason can hear the worry etched in his voice.

“Uh…no?” Jason questions and he’s not sure if he should be relieved or panicked with Gar not knowing where you are. At least he’s not calling to tell Jason you’re dead but that does not rule out you bleeding out in a ditch somewhere. “I told her to go with you.”

Gar sighs on the end, running a hand through his hair. “She took off. I thought maybe she went to find you but she was hurt and she’s not answering her phone. Molly hasn’t heard from her either.”

Jason already figured you wouldn’t go to Molly. If you went to Molly, she would worry, give you a look you don’t like, and you’d run away again anyway. The last thing you’d want to do is drag Molly into it further. But, Jason really hoped you’d have listened for once and just went with Gar. Or at least sent a text to one of them to let them know you’re okay or not.

“She hasn’t been around.” Jason keeps his voice quiet and he looks around his room as if the answer is going to be written on the walls.

“Uh…hey, I know this…might not be what it’s for, but can you track her? She was shot and we’re all really worried.” Gar’s voice is hesitant as he scrunches his nose, hating the idea of having Jason do it. It feels like an invasion of privacy, especially Gar being the one to ask but it’s a last-ditch effort.

Of course, Jason’s been thinking about it. But, something in him can’t get himself to do it. On the small chance you did shut your phone off, that means you don’t want to be found. Jason can’t overstep, he can’t intrude on you. Even if he is desperately wanting to because you could be dead. He thought maybe he’d give you twenty more minutes and then he’d just do it anyway.

“Have you looked for her?” Jason asks, eying his tablet you left out.

“No, I called you first.” Gar admits. Honestly, Gar doesn’t even know where to look but he knew Jason would.

With no one out looking for you, maybe they don’t have to track you and possibly invade your privacy. If you’re just blowing off steam or punishing yourself, Jason knows exactly where you’ll be. He figures, if him, Gar, and Molly can’t find you within an hour, checking all of your spots, he’ll use the tracker.

“Okay, you and Molly go look for her at her usual spots. Molly’ll know ‘em and I’ll check a few others. If we don’t find her in an hour, I’ll track her.” Jason nods his head on the other end.

“Do you think we’ll actually find her? I mean you know how she is.” Gar isn’t trying to be pessimistic but it’s been hours and he thought for sure, you would be with Jason.

Jason can feel the panic attack starting to course through his blood. His heart is racing and his hands are growing clammy and he’s getting unreasonably angry. It is not Gar’s fault because even on a good day, getting you to listen is like pulling fucking teeth, especially when it has to do with taking care of yourself. Jason knows this better than anyone but he’s mad anyway and he knows it’s the panic attack. You were fucking shot and he took off so he’s mad at himself for listening. And he’s mad that you were shot and Gar didn’t stop you. He can turn into a fucking tiger for fuck’s sake, couldn’t he have turned into a tiger to stop you? Tackled you to the ground and pinned you there, dragged you to the manor kicking and screaming if that’s what he had to do. You were shot and maybe you’re dead now and he didn’t help. And Jason didn’t fucking help.

“Fuck! Gar, then you should have fucking followed her!” Jason snaps and immediately feels bad about it but any part of him that should apologize is washed over with guilt and regret and more anger. “Just go fucking look for her with Molly and I’ll look other places.” Jason grabs his coat from the bed and heads for the door.

“Where should we start?” Gar is quiet on the other end.

“The zoo.” Jason spits right back without even thinking. “Start there, then the harbor and I’ll–” Jason cuts himself off as he swings the door open, seeing you right in front of him with bloodshot eyes and blood-stained clothes and hands.

Gotham never sleeps. It never stalls. Everything is always moving, always loud. There is always something going on, people always going from one spot to the next in their lives. In some ways, it’s a little comforting. A reminder that you are here. You are here and alive like all of the people you passed on your walk here living their own lives. On the other hand, you wish it were quiet sometimes. You wish it were quiet sometimes because everything seems too much sometimes and your skin crawls while your heart feels like it’s going to beat out your chest. Your head spins and everything feels too much. But, it was quiet in the basement. It was quiet in the tower before you were attacked. It was quiet in the tunnels. It was quiet when you found Jason. It was quiet when Tim was shot. Maybe quiet is the surrounding air grieving for the mess fate’s created.

So, you stand in Jason’s doorway because quiet with him, alive and breathing, has always been the safest place to be. You stand weakly, haunted by everything that’s happened as the very idea of existing physically pains the deepest parts of your heart.

It’s hard to go through the same shit all the time. You’re just supposed to be fine with it. It’s happened before and you got over it, so you can get over it again, right? At some point, someone reaches the end of their rope and you think you might be there. It is the same pain over and over again and it never gets any easier. Time passes and it all just hurts anyway. People say time heals everything but you don’t think that’s true because you think about your mom dying and it’s like the wind’s been kicked from your chest all over again. You remember Jason’s body and it’s like you're being waterboarded. Time doesn’t heal anything. It’s not even like you’re used to it. You were just traumatized and avoid thinking about everything so it doesn’t fucking hurt so much. But, even that’s just exhausting. Existing is hard and tiring and painful.

Maybe you’re just tired of being in pain.

Your bottom lip starts to quiver and you always felt safest with him. Even from your own thoughts. You never felt too much pain around him. He always knows exactly what to do and it’s all too much right now. Being alone doesn’t work anymore. So, you stare up at him as Jason’s brows pull together with a cross between worry and relief.

“Jason?” Gar calls. “You there?” Gar asks.

“I got her.” Jason says. “She’s here. I’ll call you later.” Jason says quickly before hanging up. “Hey.” Jason’s voice is soft and careful, noticing you’re not making eye contact with him.

You walk the couple of feet up to him as Jason keeps his stance, almost ready to do whatever you’ll need. And all you do is lean forward and rest your forehead against his chest. Jason lets out a breath and you’re able to pull one in for the first time. Jason rests his hand on your back, rubbing up and down slowly as he hears you sniffle against him.

“Gar was calling in a search party. Where the fuck were you?” Jason asks and he should have some sort of bite in his voice but he’s too worried and too relieved.

You look back up to him and shake your head. “Walking. I couldn’t-I couldn’t…do it.” Your jaw squares as you try to hold back your own tears. “S-sorry..I-I didn’t mean to…to, uh, worry you guys. I-I just…just couldn’t.”

Jason nods with understanding, looking you over and it doesn’t look like you took care of the gunshot wound. Your clothes are soaked and your hair is an utter mess. There’s blood on your face and he swears your cheeks are stained with tears and you actually look cold.

Jason rests his hand on your cheek and you finally meet his eyes. “You alright?” Jason asks softly.

“Hurts.” You mutter and his hand almost feels like it’s burning your cheek. He’s so warm.

“The gunshot?” Jason questions, almost afraid of the answer.

“Everything.” You answer weakly with defeat.

You've never seen his look on him before. His jaw is squared but it’s soft rather than harsh like he’d been trying to shatter his own teeth. His brows are pinched but not completely pulled together and they’re aimed downward, etched in worry. His eyes are scanning you over every few seconds as if he’s stuck between thinking you aren’t really here and terrified something really bad is about to happen. Jason Todd worries and you've seen him worried plenty of times but this is different. You've seen him scared, too, plenty of times. More times than you can really count. But, this is different. It’s a different look and it’s because it’s you. And that look alone, chops and hacks at the barrier holding you together until it finally crumbles at your feet.

“It’s all my fault, Jay.” You sputter as you feel your eyes starting to water again. “It’s all my fault and I really fucked up and Tim could die or he did die. I don’t even know cause I left and I’m a fucking coward for leaving and it’s all my fucking fault.” Your mouth waters and you can’t look at his eyes because it’s all too much. “And there was so much…blood again. And the last time…it was you and it was horrible and I lost you and I couldn’t do it again and it just hurts all the time.” You suck in a shaky breath. “And-and Gar would say it’s not my fault and he’d give me the look but it is my fault. And Dick would be mad at me and I deserve it but I can’t hear it right now because I don’t know if I can handle it. And….it’s just-it’s just my fault. And I don’t know if could save him but I tried and I tried to save you, too.” You sputter before a sob finally rips through your throat. It bounces against the walls in a strangled and broken wail as if the very life you've lived has finally taken its toll on you for the last time. Jason isn’t sure he can listen to it because it physically pains him to see and hear you like this.

“Y/n.” Jason tries to get out but you shake your head.

“I tried really fucking hard to save you and it didn’t work. And I had to call Bruce and beg him to help me and he couldn’t and it was so fucking horrible and painful and scary.” You try to suck in a breath as tears scatter down your face. Everything is just wet and ugly, and burning. “It was so bad and I was so alone.” You suck in a ragged breath, your voice cracking and breaking between sobs. “Because Molly didn’t know and fuck Bruce and Gar wasn’t here. I was so alone and it was so scary because there was so much blood and brain matter.” Jason almost winces hearing it. “I don’t know if I would have been able to recognize you if you didn’t have the fucking Robin suit. It was so fucking bad and it hurts to think about and believe it happened but you’re here. And then Tim gets shot and there’s so much blood and I had to ask Dick to help and it’s like I’m there with your body again and it’s scary and it’s painful and I hate it. I hate how much it hurts. I hate doing this. I hate that it keeps happening.” Your chest heaves as you look at Jason with tears soaking your cheeks and your eyes finally meet his. And all Jason can see is defeat. “What if it just keeps happening?”

Jason shakes his head and every single time he is reminded you were the one that found him, he sends himself into a guilt-ridden spiral. Of course, you found him. That isn’t the issue. The issue is what it looked like from your perspective and the devastation it caused. He knows. He knows what it is like to find someone you love dead. He knows and it’s horrible and painful and devastating. It makes someone feel completely hopeless and helpless and useless. There has never been a time where he felt more helpless. And then he put you in that same position, not on purpose. But, he did and it was worse because it was gorey and traumatizing and he left you. He didn’t realize how badly it had traumatized you. It traumatized him, too but it affects you.

Dying doesn’t just happen to the person that’s dead. It happens to everyone around them.

“I’m so sorry.” Jason says softly, sliding his hand off your cheek. He shakes his head, biting his own tongue because he almost wants to cry with you. “I’m fucking sorry.” Jason wraps his arm around your shoulders as he pulls you into him. He’s careful not to hug you too tight, minding the gunshot wound he knows he’ll be taking care of for you later. “You’re not coward.” Jason manages to get out as he tries to come up with an answer for you even though he doesn’t think he’ll ever have one. The reality is that it will keep happening.

“Yeah, I am.” You argue back before you look up at him. “What fucking person just leaves as their friend is bleeding on the ground?”

“Someone who’s fucking traumatized.” Jason bites back. “Someone who was also fucking shot and in shock. You tried to help him and me knowing the shit you’d get for it. You fucking knew I went after the Joker and you show up alone, ready to take him on by your fucking self if you had to. You think that makes you a coward? What’s that make me then, huh?” Jason questions back, knowing you’ll never think of him as a coward, even if he sees that in himself sometimes.

“Not a coward but that’s different.” You argue.

“Fucking how?” Jason spits back. “You left Tim with Dick and the rest of the Titans who would know what to do. You were also fucking shot.” Jason shakes his head.

Jason wonders if this is what it's like dealing with him sometimes. Going round and round, circling the drain into a self-destructive spiral that only seems to have one result. It's not that he minds, it's that you think this. You're anything but a coward and Jason can't even figure out how you could think otherwise. You always do what you think is best for yourself and for the people you care about. Always. And you fight tooth and nail, as hard and as fast as you possibly can for what you believe. That's not cowardly.

“I-I know but…” You sniffle as you shake your head. “H-how can I keep doing this? I mean…losing people and the blood and….how can I do this for other people when I can’t even save the people I love?” You ask bluntly. “That’s shit, you know? We’re supposed to be out helping people and…and I can’t even…I fail with the people that matter. So, what’s the point?”

Jason would be lying if he doesn't question what the point is half the time, especially over the last few days. What's the point of living if this is even how it plays out? Pain and chaos, destruction and lonelienss. It's all pretty miserable, actually. But, he holds on anyway because it wasn't always like this.

Shit gets bad and then it gets better and yeah, it is exhausting sometimes. But, it's always gotten better. Jason doesn't know how much better it'll get from here now but he won't tell you that. He just knows he wakes up and he tries because you were nearly beaten an inch from your life and you find so much joy and love in small things that that alone seems to give Jason some sort of hope. And because Gar's family was killed and Gar was experimented on and he is the most optimistic person he has ever met. And because Molly lived on the streets with the death of her parents and Molly is the nicest person Jason has ever met. If all of these people can just be better after everything, than he can't very well just give up. And you can't either. Maybe there isn't a point but you'll never know if you give up.

“You know what you told me? You are the one that said sometimes we fail, that’s part of the job. But, we try.” Jason licks his lips as he sucks in a breath. “You talked me off the roof. Maybe Deathstroke would have tried to kill me or done worse shit if it weren’t for you. Fucking Pete Hawkins bullshit. The kid at Jerry’s. You were the one that fought tooth and fucking nail to save Gar. And you did, by the way. You saved Tim at Excellent Gotham. You failed two fucking times but by my count, you win more often.”

“Three times.” You correct him, earning you a glare. “Gar got kidnapped, we failed then…too.”

“You were both tranquilized and they used kryptonite on Krypto. I don’t think that counts.” Jason nods his head.

“I guess.” You let out a breath, looking to your shoes. “I just, uh,” You sniffle as you shake your head, looking back to him. “I just want the pain to stop.” Your voice cracks again.

Jason doesn’t say it, but he does, too. So, he wraps his arms around you and pulls you into him.

You press your cheek to his chest, wrapping your arms around him as your breathing is still rapid and ragged. But, you can hear his heartbeat in between breaths. It’s fast but steady. A lot quicker than it usually is but it is there. A few more tears leak out as you count his heartbeat and are fully engulfed by his warmth. You hadn’t realized just how numb you had gotten from the cold until now. Your fingers and toes are starting to feel like painful pins and needles. Your arms are burning and your cheek sting from the salty tears. It’s as if you're thawing from his warmth. Between that and his steady heartbeat, you calm yourself down.

“I can try to help.” Jason whispers softly. “If you’ll have me.” Jason pulls away just enough to look down at you and your eyes meet his.

You told him before that you’d come for everything that ever hurt him if it came to it. Anyone that ever wanted to hurt him, would have to go through you. Because he was just Jason Todd to you. It didn’t matter that he could -- should have been able to -- take care of himself. And Jason knew that’s how it was for him, too. Anyone who wants to hurt you, has to go through him. But, the problem is that someone did hurt you…because of him. And he hurt you. Right now you're in pain and it’s because of him. It’s not right and it’s not fair to you but Jason wants to protect you. He’d cut out pieces of his heart and glue them to yours if it would make you feel better. He would do anything in this world if it would make your pain less. Any form of pain that wants to come for you, is going to have to go through him first. From now on.

You nod your head. “Always.” You croak out.

“Come on.” Jason releases his arms and cold rushes itself right back over your body. “Sit on the bed, I’ll grab you some clothes and supplies to clean that shit. We’ll start there.”

“Thanks, Jay.” You mutter softly, walking to the bed and Jason watches you carefully.

He wonders if this is how it always felt for you. He’d come home bloody and bruised, weak and pitiful. Scared and in pain. He never said anything but Jason knows you always knew. Somehow, you always knew when he was hurt and scared. But, it was always him walking through the door hurt, not you. And it was you that would stitch him up. Sure, he’s helped you with your hands, but you did it at least twice a week for months. And you never complained. But, Jason wonders if this is what it feels like.

It feels like he’s carrying the weight of the world for the both of you and he’s trapped in a worrying spin. And he is so fucking sad for you. It’s not pity, but just sadness. It’s wanting the best for you and you to have everything good in this world because you deserve it. And wanting to witness it because he loves you. It’s just wanting to see you smile and happy, making some stupid joke and telling him to fuck off. It’s just wanting you to not be in pain anymore. He wonders if this is how it felt being you and if so, he wants to know so badly how the fuck you dealt with it because he feels like he’s suffocating while he grabs you clothes.

Jason walks back over to you, handing you a pair of sweatpants and a red hoodie. “I got first aid shit in the bathroom so change and I’ll be back.” Jason nods his head at you.

“Okay.” You answer weakly and Jason hesitates for a few seconds before he practically runs off to the bathroom.

You're weak and unsteady as you change into the sweats. You're realizing you haven’t eaten in a while and you haven’t had much to drink either. That’s definitely not helping your mental state and you know it. But, if you were being really honest, none of those activities sound like things you're currently capable of doing. Changing is even almost too much effort at this point. And it fucking hurts as you try to take your shirt off to swap it for the hoodie.

“Need help?” Jason appears right back not two minutes later.

You always hated feeling helpless but not around him. “Yeah, it hurts.” You sniffle softly, sitting pitifully on the bed.

Jason walks over, resting the kit beside you before he lightly grabs the hem of your hoodie. Jason helps you tug it off of your bad shoulder and then over your head, you groaning the entire time. With the hoodie off, you're left in a blue t-shirt and Jason sees where the bullet hole is, covered in red and brown. With the chaos of last night, he didn’t check and wasn’t able to check if the wound was a through and through. Jason's stomach twists at the thought that it's not. But, he hides his worry, looking back to you with a soft sigh.

“How did you wanna do this?” Jason asks bluntly.

Your brows furrow in confusion. “I-I don’t know?” You shake your head.

“I can’t clean it with your shirt on.” Jason sucks in a breath and normally he’d have some comment about seeing you half naked again but he can’t quite muster it this time.

“Oh…” You whisper and you swear it’s fine. It’s not like you haven’t seen each other naked before and it’s not like you didn’t see Jason fully exposed just the other night. There is something that just feels…new and vulnerable again. “That’s fine.” You nod and Jason leans forward again, tugging the hem of your shirt up and over your head, freeing your arm. You grab Jason's hoodie with your good arm and Jason helps tug it onto your good arm, you thankful it's a zip-up and not a pullover. “Guess that’ll do.” You suck in a breath and you're kind of tired of feeling like this. “I expect you to actually help and not just stare at my tits the whole time.”

Jason manages a cheeky smirk. “You know I’m ass guy anyway.” Jason glances down and then back to you.

“Shithead.” You mutter and Jason’s head swims. It’s been so long since you've called him that and it almost feels nostalgic.

“Babe.” Jason quips back.

Jason takes out his phone, examining the gunshot now that there isn’t anything in the way. There’s still blood everywhere and he can’t even tell if it’s because you did such a shit job at cleaning it or if the wound is actually that bad. Something in his stomach twists and turns into a gnawing pain at the thought this is worse than he originally thought. But, he keeps a straight face, not to let his worry cross even a single line of his face. When he worries, you worry.

Jason grabs a wet rag from the bowl he brought in with him, gently cleaning around the area to try to get a better look. You let out a shaking breath, the water cool against your skin.

“Sorry, no hot water.” Jason barely glances to you as he scrubs some of the dry blood away.

“Should probably fix that.”

“Pilot lights are expensive.”

“I have Bruce’s credit card.” You mutter quietly, earning a look from Jason.

He stops, looking up at you fully. “You would.”

“Eat the rich.” You shrug. “Or take their money when it’s offered to you and he didn’t ask for it back.” Jason lets out a snicker before he goes back to cleaning. “You should use yours. It might send up a red flag for Bruce and maybe he’ll call someone back or come back.”

You hate the words as they leave your lips because wanting Bruce back means admitting defeat. But, Gotham has gone to absolute shit since Bruce decided to fuck off somewhere. At least Gotham had some degree of fear and respect for the Bat. They don't seem to like the Titans very much. And Jason's been off his rocker and you've been stuck trying to help him. Gotham does need someone they respect. Bruce should definitely come back. And if for no other reason, to see his son is alive again.

Jason scoffs. “Yeah, fucking right.” He shakes his head in annoyance. “Fuck Bruce. I don’t need him.”

Before he died, he was getting better about talking about his problems and the things that kept him up at night. He was doing better with it but then he comes back and the very idea of talking about it makes him want to crash through a window headfirst onto solid pavement. In all fairness, he already hated talking about Bruce. It was one thing to complain about him but it was an entirely other thing to unravel and dig into actually talking about him. Now, though, it’s worse because every time Jason thinks about Bruce, it’s as if his heart starts to break all over again.

Maybe him getting bludgeoned death was his fault. He knew better. But, where was Bruce? Bruce gave up on him. And then…was going to let the Joker just…live. Jason was supposed to be Bruce’s son and he couldn’t even kill the Joker for him or do anything about him. And maybe, just maybe, Jason could get over that eventually but Jason’s alive again and Bruce is nowhere to be found. With everything going on in Gotham, Jason is certain Dick would have called Bruce and let him know. If for no other reason than to rat Jason out to “dad”. So, maybe Jason feels like he was always a little expendable to Bruce, not just Crane or the Titans. And that part hurts the most.

“Didn’t say you did?” You let out a breath. “Just saying is all.” You pull in a deep breath. “Fuck Bruce, yeah. Just saying.” You, for one, still hate Bruce but Jason hating Bruce seems weird. You chalked it up to the drug at first and Crane but…Jason’s clean. It’s weird, even for Jason. “What’s your sudden issue with Bruce anyway?”

“You got a problem with me having a problem with Bruce all of a sudden?” Jason spits back and he shouldn’t, given your current state but his heartache over being abandoned by him is fresh.

“Oh, no. I am actually fine with that cause fuck Bruce but it’s weird. After all of that shit, you come back and suddenly don’t like him. That’s weird, Jay. Even for you.”

“Never fucking mattered to him. I was always just the replacement for Dick anyway. Doesn’t fucking matter.” Jason dips the rag into the water, rinsing some of the blood off before going back to the wound.

You furrow your brows, trying to figure out where that’s even coming from. “Uh…not true? Bruce is a fucking weirdo and shit but I actually think he gives a shit about you, Jay. Outside of Robin and Dick. You always said that, too. Like deep down you knew that, so what is it now?”

Jason grows more and more angered but he knows you aren’t going to drop it. “You were fucking right, alright?” Jason snaps back. “Should have killed the fucking Joker because he killed me. So fuck him.” Jason keeps his explanation short.

“Right yeah, had he just killed him, you wouldn’t have died and it doesn’t make up for it because too little, too late shit, but like…he did—“

“Can you fucking drop it, please?” Jason’s words come out more as a demand rather than a request. “I’m done fucking talking about it.” Jason looks at your shoulder from your back, seeing there’s no hole in the fabric.

“Sorry.” You say softly. It just doesn’t sit right with you. You’d still be pissed at Bruce, too because had he killed the Joker in the first place that wouldn’t have happened but that’s…not really Jason. He doesn’t hold many grudges and Bruce did kill the Joker. It was a little late for that but he did, to avenge Jason. Bruce didn’t throw his morals away for Dick, he threw them away for Jason and that would normally mean something to him. It’s weird but you know when to push and when not to. You're not in the mood to fight it anyway. “Just thought it was weird, is all.”

“It’s fine. Sorry.” Jason squints at the wound, seeing something shine back at him and his heart plummets. He grabs his phone, shining a light into the wound again. “The bullet is still inside.”

“Figured.” You let out a breath.

“I have to take it out.”

Your eyes land on his and you know this is about to suck. “Okay.” You nod your head.

“Lay back and hold the phone so I can see.” Jason hands you his phone as you do as told.

Jason grabs a pair of tweezers from the kit and he looks at the wound, grabbing your wrist to make sure the light is in the right position. Jason’s stomach twists into a hard knot, knowing how bad this is going to hurt. His leg starts to throb with the very thought of putting you through it. But, it has to be done. You're not going to go to an actual doctor for help and if he leaves the bullet in, it can lead to infection. So, Jason sucks in a deep breath and bends down hovering over the wound, careful not to block the light.

“It’s gonna hurt.” Jason glances up at you.

“Just do it.” You sigh, looking to the ceiling as your grip on his phone tightens.

Jason nods his head before gently sticking the tweezers into the wound. You slam your eyes shut as your jaw clenches. Your right hand grips onto the blanket beneath you as Jason moves the tweezers around. It’s burning and stinging like getting stung by a thousand hornets at once. It’s as if you're being shot in the spot over and over again as tears well behind your eyes. Jason is trying to be careful and quick, but the bullet is slippery thanks to the blood.

Your hand starts to shake as your breath grows rapid and uneven. You try your best to concentrate on anything besides the pain but that’s becoming increasingly more difficult. It was different when you were in the fight for your life. It was do or die and people can do absolutely insane things they should not have been able to accomplish in life or death situations. Your life isn’t in danger right now and even when you try to focus on something else, the tweezers move just enough and you're brought back to agonizing pain.

Given the events that happened, it’s hard for you to focus on anything other than the pain you're been in. You try to think of the good times but then those are tarnished like rusted silverware. Those good memories now come with pain, too. You try to focus on what you’re going to do about Crane because maybe that would kick in your fighting instincts but you're the one lying in a bed right now after being shot by him. Everything around you feels like it’s rusting and chipping away into a toxic pile of reds and browns. Tainted, tarnished, and broken.

Jason glances up to you and he can see the agony written in every wrinkle and pinch of your skin. And he can’t see with the phone basically vibrating in your hand. All he can even feel is anger and not at you. It’s entirely on him and Crane because at the end of the day, it’s his fault and Crane’s how you ended up here. You never should have been shot. You were only there to look out for him. You and Tim were collateral damage. So many people around Jason end up just being collateral damage. And they don’t deserve it. But, at the end of the day, he isn’t the one that pulled the trigger at you and all he wants to do is go right after Crane. Make him feel the same pain he’s put you through. And then worse.

“Y/n.” Jason says, sternly. “You have to stop moving. I can’t see.”

You swallow thickly, trying to stabilize your hand. “Sorry.” You manage to mutter through your gritted teeth.

Jason goes back to the wound but the second he sticks the tweezers into the flesh, you wince and flinch as hard you try to stay still. Jason is no stranger to this and he knows it is agonizing to pick something out of an open wound. Nerves and flesh are exposed that should not be. It’s horrendous and seconds feel like hours. And it’s triggering phantom pain in his leg as his heart feels like it’s being suffocated with barbed wire. He knows it’s bad when you're the one who can’t sit still.

Jason pulls back, putting the tweezers back in the kit before he cups your cheeks. He bends down so his face is just an inch from yours and you open your eyes slowly, your jaw still clenched and tears threatening to finally fall.

“You gotta stay still or I’m never gonna be able to get it out.” Jason’s voice is stern.

“It fucking hurts.” Your voice cracks weakly as you sniffle.

“You were almost beaten to death. This isn’t gonna fucking kill you. You’ll be fine.” Jason nods his head once at you before he presses his forehead to yours for just a second.

You nod weakly at him. “Yeah…”

“Just…stay still and I’ll be quick, alright?” Jason asks, seeing the doubt across your face. “I got you.” Jason offers a weak smile.

“Okay.” You nod your head in agreement.

Jason nods once more before he goes back to your wound. He focuses on the bullet while the tweezers hover above you and you can’t help but notice the lack of shaking in his hands. Come to think of it, you aren’t sure the last time you saw his hand so steady. Jason has always been so steady around you. An unmovable force.

Jason looks back to you, raising his brows as if silently asking if you if you're ready and all you do is nod quickly before looking back to the ceiling. Your grip tightens on the phone while you lock in place with all of your might just to try to stay steady.

The tweezers stick back into the bloody wound, carefully and steadily as they go right to the bullet. Jason keeps his eyes laser-focused on just getting the bullet out and you grit your teeth together as tears come to your eyes. But, you suck in a deep breath as you feel the metal scraping around the wound, clinging onto every part your self-control in order to stay steady. That’s when Jason finally is able to grab the bullet, pulling it out in a steady motion, careful not to drop it.

Jason holds the bullet with the tweezers as a triumphant grin comes to his lips. You peek your eyes open at him, the whites turning a bright shade of pale pink.

“Told you I got you.” Jason shrugs casually but the grin quirks into a cheeky smirk.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah thanks.” You roll your eyes as you sniffle.

“You alright?”

“Yeah, that shit was just, uh painful. I really don’t recommend getting shot.” You lay the phone down beside you before rubbing your right eye.

“Yeah, don’t plan on it.” Jason quips back. “Probably stop hurting soon without the bullet.”

“Be nice.” You let out a sigh. “And Dick really just went to bed like this. What a fucking psycho.”

"Yeah, but you went MIA." Jason narrows his eyes at you because maybe he is a little mad at you for it. They were all worried. He was worried. "You bitch about him but--"

“If you fucking say it, Jason Todd, I’ll kill you again.” You deadpan. “You two are the ones that are oddly similar, okay?”

Jason lets out a scoff. “Bullshit. I’m nothing like him.”

You roll your eyes. “Yeah, you are. You’re different but you’re similar. You just don’t wanna see it. What? You never looked up to him before all of this shit?” You ask.

Jason sits back on his heels, dropping the bullet in the first aid kit with the tweezers to toss and clean later. “What’s to look up to?” Jason scoffs. “Being a fucking kiss ass and a goody two-shoes.”

“Because he was the first Robin.” You state casually. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, about you replacing him and shit whatever. But, didn’t you ever look up to him for even a little bit?”

Jason hangs his head and while he’s always felt less than and a bit like a failure when it came to filling his shoes, he definitely did look up to him. Dick created something so special and surreal when it came to Robin. He wasn’t Batman, he was just a kid in a suit helping Batman and that was cool. Then Bruce had all of these stories about Dick and it always made Jason want to be like him because Dick was good. That’s how Bruce always talked anyway. Jason doesn’t know that Bruce always talked about Jason in the same way when he wasn’t around. And Dick doesn’t know how Bruce would talk about him to everyone else. But Jason heard the stories and how great Dick was. He never wanted to be exactly like him but he definitely wanted to be somewhat like him. Dick’s parents were killed and he got to be Robin. By all that Jason heard, it seemed he made it out of it okay. He had Robin and he got to carry that with him. He got to have a career in helping people (kind of). Jason did want to be like him but the way he sees it, there’s a reason people say not to meet your heroes.

“Still mad about the Joker shit but…uh,” You sniffle again. “Don’t know, be a lie if I said I didn’t look up to him…and you.”

“Me?”

“I always liked your Robin.” You say quietly. “You were different. Felt like we needed your version. But I told you that.”

“Surprised you still think it.”

“I think we need someone like Red Hood.” You state, catching Jason entirely off guard.

“What? Another fucking murderer?” Jason scoffs, looking to the window above the bed before he looks back to you.

He feels so ashamed of it all at times, like right now. It's because you're the one lying here after being shot by someone Jason thought he could trust. He knows deep down, crime in Gotham needs a change. The Bat doesn't fix everything, clearly. There needs to be someone out there that is willing to do more but Jason isn't sure that's him. He already burned his bridges. He doused them in gasoline and lit a match with a smile. He feels like he's on the wrong side and there's nothing he can do to rebuild that bridge to be on the right side anymore. If there's even a right side.

“No. Someone who’s willing to do the heavy and bad shit in order to prevent worse shit from happening. Like I said, I’m not just killing people for you, it’s for all of us and everyone that will come after us. I think we need people like that and people are afraid of you and rightfully so. I dunno. Just my take, I guess.”

“Been thinking about the people I killed.” Jason lets out a breath. “Heavy shit.”

“Yeah, but a lot of that is greater good shit and the other stuff is Crane’s manipulation so you shouldn’t feel too guilty for those.” You shrug your good shoulder.

Jason shakes his head and he doesn't how you deal with any of it. You don't normally deal with much, if Jason is being honest. But, you seem to be dealing with this pretty okay. Somewhere in him, he always felt like if someone were going to go on a killing spree, you would probably be that person. Your morals have never aligned with Dick's or Bruce's. You've always felt like more could be done, permanently. But, Jason's surprised you seem so okay with it and with him killing people.

“How the fuck are you dealing with it?”

You let out a broken laugh. “I’m not.” You answer honestly. “So much shit is happening that I just…can’t.” You shake your head. “Can’t think about it.”

Jaso nods with understanding. “Yeah.” Jason sucks in a breath, deciding to drop the conversation. It feels too much again. Too loud. Too heavy. “Stay still.” Jason leans forward, grabbing the rag before he starts cleaning her wound again.

You watch him carefully. He’s not handling anything well which you can’t say you really blame him for. You wonder what you would be doing if you were in his position. How would you ever forgive yourself for not only everything that’s happened but also being manipulated? Being manipulated isn’t Jason’s fault but you know he’s probably blaming himself for it because you would be blaming yourself for it if it were you. You wonder how he feels about coming back. You haven’t really talked about it and part of that is you're just afraid to ask because talking about him dying nearly sends you into a spiraling panic attack. But, you wonder how he’s dealing with that and if he’s happy he’s back.

Jason’s hands are steady as he grabs the gauze, his brows pinched together with concentration as he goes back to the wound and you find yourself wondering if you were meant to be anyway. Everything seemed so much easier in San Francisco. You weren’t together then and it was all just fun and games. Sure, you both were kidnapped and that was bad. But, that was one thing. Meanwhile, being together in Gotham has been a shitshow since the start almost. Maybe it’s just the butterfly effect but you wonder if it was just you both trying to find solace in each other or if it was as real as it’s always felt. Maybe you were just feeding off of each other’s own self-destruction and avoidance. Maybe being together helped the other one crumble.

Your eyes scan over his face and you realize, you don’t remember the last time you saw his face bruised. But, while you were together, he was always littered in them and almost always had one somewhere on his face like a Jackson Pollock. That solidifies the thought of you. Maybe you weren’t meant to be after all. Maybe you were actually bad for each other. Maybe you being together really was just you both self-destructing, knowing damn well one of you would die and it would destroy you. Maybe being together was always a way to hurt yourselves in the worst way.

And that hurts worse than the gunshot.

You've always been so sure about him. Even when you weren't sure, a part of you was. It was always supposed to be him. Him and you. But, you were shot and you're thinking a lot about how people's lives might be better if you weren't in them anymore. You're thinking about how things might be better for Jason if you weren't together. You skew your own reality, convincing yourself you got together in order to hurt yourselves. That's all it could possibly be. You ignore every thought about you confessing how loving him is the easiest thing you'd ever done. You push every thought of every soft moment you have ever had into the darkest part of your mind where they can be tainted and painted over. You push away everything Jason has ever told you and goes against everything Jason has ever believed about himself and what he deserves. It all feels like lies to yourself. It was just self-destruction because that has to be it, right?

You go back and forth with yourself. One part of you thinking this must be fact and the other part of you thinking it's just because it's a bad day. Everything feels worse on bad days and it is so easy to push everything good into a dark corner and paint right over it as if it were something different entirely. And today is a bad day. So, a part of you screams and begs for you to just ask Jason because Jason wouldn't lie. If it was all just self-destruction, Jason would tell you. He wouldn't lie about it.

“Do you think we were just a consequence of our own self-destruction?” You ask quietly, moving your eyes to the ceiling. "Or...was it like....real?"

Jason hears the question and pauses. He almost questions if he heard you correctly but he glances back to you and you're avoiding his stare which means he definitely did. His heart sinks and he thinks he forgot how to breathe for a second. Do you actually think that? Jason isn’t sure what would hurt more at this point. You thinking that’s all you were to him or that being all you were to you.

“What?” Jason asks, more for clarity.

“I mean like…exactly, uh, what I said. Do, uh, d-do you think we were just a consequence of our own self-destruction?” You chew the inside of your cheek and you regret asking. “Or…was it all real?”

The question hangs in the air like the blade of a guillotine, just waiting for one of you to pull the rope and end it all. The air starts to feel stale and cold and heavy as Jason doesn’t move, processing the question.

He’s not entirely sure where that question is even coming from. This whole time, you've wanted nothing more than him and you've said that. You have told him that he is all you have ever wanted. Why would you just be a consequence? Was he just a consequence?

Jason sits all the way up, coming into view. “Do you think that?” Jason asks bluntly as his breath hangs in the stagnant air. It’s as if he is clawing at the last remaining parts of his voice to remain steady and not shatter and break.

You look back to him, following the hollowed lines of worry of his face. You aren’t sure he’s breathing and you regret asking the question. You don’t even know why you asked in the first place. It’s not like you actually want to know because sometimes not knowing is just better, less painful. And the look on his face isn’t making you feel any better because he looks torn between devasted and angry.

“I asked you first.” You say quietly.

“No.” Jason states bluntly, almost harshly.

Being with you was never him self-destructing. In Jason’s eyes, as much as it all got fucked up in the end, being with you healed more parts of him than he ever thought possible. Being with you actually healed parts of him he swore would never be put together no matter how hard he tried. You made him better. He got to be who he wanted to be with you and shamelessly, you fully accepted him. And he really thought, he could be that version of himself forever because you always convinced him he could. You made him want to put in a hard effort into coming home and thinking twice before doing something a little too reckless, outside of the whole Crane and Joker thing. You showed him what it was like to be loved without conditions. And Jason loves you still. No conditions. No consequence. No self-destruction. He loves you yesterday, today, and he is positive he’ll love you tomorrow and every day after that because he wants to.

“Do you?” Jason asks, choosing not to elaborate.

You swallow a lump in your throat. Despite your own negative thoughts, you know you don't. Not really. Maybe you thinking it is a self-destruction thing, maybe it's your way of trying in order to punish yourself for Tim and everything else. But, no. Of course, not.

“No.” Your voice is quiet and fragile, making Jason’s heart sink because he knows there’s a but coming. “But, uh..we just…we ended up here.” You let out a scoff. “And, uh, I don’t know.” You shake your head. “We said some pretty fucked up shit to each other and I know…uh, I know you were high but, uh…yeah.”

Devasted. That’s all Jason can feel because he’s one of the reasons you even asked. He knows he said some horrible shit to you and he can’t take any of it back. Words are long-lasting. They enter the air and stick to it, absorbing itself into your lungs as you pull in a breath and let it fester there. That’s where the words start and travel to your brain where they store away, pecking at you just at the right moments. No one can take words back and Jason knows that. But, he has to try anyway even if he doesn't think it’ll salvage you. You have to know you meant and mean the entire world to him still.

“I didn’t mean any of that shit, okay? I swear, I didn’t fucking mean it.” Jason states quickly. “I was fucking high and I just wanted to fucking hurt you which is fucked up and I’m fucking sorry.” Jason spits out quickly but with a fire. There is no relief coming to your face and even if you are nothing to each other after this is over, he needs you to believe him. Jason cups your face. “I fucking swear. We weren’t a fucking mistake and you were the best thing that happened to me and I fucked that up. That’s on me. You made me better. I’m fucking so sorry, alright?”

You nod against his hand. And you know. You were also high and none of the shit you said is true. You didn't mean any of it. You didn't even mean the shit you said while you were sober. Maybe it's just a part of you that needs it to be verified today.

“I know and I’m sorry, too. I don’t know. I just get thinking about it, I guess. We both ended up here and it’s just…” You suck in a breath. “I know.” You place your hands over his. “Because I said some horrible shit, too, and then I hit you. And uh…I know. It’s just…that on top of everything else that happened. Like…” You shrug softly. “You died, Jason.”

Jason drops his hands, shaking his head, putting the pieces together. There is no way in hell you really think him going off on his own is your fault. Every piece of that shit plan, was on Jason. It was on him to just wait and get help. It was on him to reach out and get help. It was on him not to trust Crane. Everything was on him. That's not for you to carry.

“You don’t really think that shit is on you, right?”

“I should have seen it.” You sputter. “I should have fucking known, Jay. And the more I think about it, the more I think maybe I did know and maybe I just…let it happen to teach you a lesson about being dumb out there and—“

“Stop.” Jason cuts you off sharply. “You would never let me go after the fucking Joker by myself. You never would have even if you wanted to teach me some lesson. And I don’t think that’s it either. You do the same shit I do.” Jason scoffs. “I went after him. By myself. I do what I always did. I went after him. Alone, And I died alone. Because I never fucking ask for help. That’s not on you. And it’s got nothing to fucking do with us.”

“Yeah, but if you were me?” You question. “You’d be thinking the same thing. There were so many signs and I just…somehow missed every single one of them. I have to think I ignored them and maybe not to teach you a lesson but because I was scared.”

Jason sucks in a breath and he knows you're right because if it were him, he’d never forgive himself. If the roles were reversed, he’d also be questioning how he missed it and maybe he let you do it. Maybe he ignored the signs on purpose. Jason, being on the side he is, knows for a fact you didn’t willfully ignore any sign. You have shown him time and time again that if you have any say in it, you’d never let something happen to him. But, Jason understands why you think that so he sucks in a breath and decides to take some of that Gar advice for once.

“I remember what I was thinking about while the Joker was playing whack-a-mole with my head.” Jason mutters, earning him a grimace and a glare from you.

“Really?” You give him a displeased look.

Jason shrugs. “Well…” Jason sucks in a breath with the quick raise of his brows.

“You do though?” You ask cautiously.

Jason nods. “Yeah, I…I remember everything.” Jason swallows the growing lump in his throat. “Told you that, but…yeah.” Jason nods quickly. “Remember thinking I should have just listened to you. I should have told you because you would have talked me out of it, you would have told Bruce and Dick. I’d be pissed…but you would have helped and I wouldn’t be getting killed. So…just fucking saying,” Jason sucks in a breath and goes back to your wound. “Me dying had nothing to fucking do with you and there was nothing you could have done differently. We weren’t a consequence our own self-destruction. I’m really fucking sorry for all of the shit I’ve put you through.”

Your brows furrow and your heart starts to break again. It must be a horrible task to wake up every single day with memories, even down to final thoughts, about literally dying. You know it’s your own personal hell at this point but the idea of Jason reliving it every single day…it’s worse. And the fact he brought it up without you asking, you know.

“I forgive you, Jay.” You say quietly. “And I really, really, mean that, okay? Your, uh…your last thoughts…were regret?” You ask cautiously.

Jason shakes his head. “No.” Jason answers plainly. “Not all of them.” Jason lets out a breath. The last thing Jason wants is to talk about how the last thing he remembers is knowing he was going to die. You don't need to know that, that's for damn sure.“I-I don’t want to talk about it though. I really just needed you to know that.”

“Thank you, Jay." You watch him carefully, seeing something distant and broken cloud over his eyes. His brows pull together as if he's in pain and his hand starts to shake. You hope he'll talk about it one day. Maybe being brought back isn't all it's cracked up to be. "When you do want to talk, please talk t me.”

“I will.” Jason nods his head at you once before finishing up the wound.

“Maybe we were both just ticking time bombs to get here.” You suck in a breath. “I don’t think we were a consequence and it was real for me. I just…had to ask I guess.”

“Maybe we kept each other from getting here.” Jason nearly mutters the words under his breath before he goes back to fixing up your wound.

You let the silence fill the room as you think about it because maybe he’s right. It wasn’t until he died the two of you fell off the deep end. Sure, things weren’t great for you both mentally but maybe you together helped stabilize some part of you both. Maybe being together was the glue you both needed like a kintsugi sculpture. Putting broken pieces back together to be better than they were before. You both ended up here but maybe that’s better.

In the last two weeks, the two of you have learned more about each other and life and the consequences of everything. Maybe that’s how it was supposed to be. So, you both could be better people today. Maybe you both rely too much on each other to help you mend your broken pieces but that doesn’t mean you were bad together or you were the cause of this. That doesn’t mean who you both are today is worse. Maybe who you both are today is better because it’s honest.

You both are scared but you both are honest and you aren’t letting your fears control every aspect of everything you do. You’re both standing up for yourselves in ways you didn’t think you would. Jason is figuring out his shit now and standing where he should. Where he wants. He’s standing up against people who made him feel worthless, something he otherwise never did too much. Maybe this is who you both are meant to be in the end and maybe that’s not so bad.

“Done.” Jason backs away as you look down, seeing your shoulder bandaged. “Don’t get shot again.” Jason manages the tint of a smirk.

“Gee, I wonder why I didn’t think of that.” You mock him before you sit up and slide the hoodie on entirely.

“Yeah, you really fucking should have. I mean, get it together, babe.” Jason offers a little bit of snark, the smirk pulling at the corner of his mouth.

“Okay, fuck you.” You laugh softly. “Thank you.”

Jason nods his head. “Anytime.” Jason smiles softly at you.

You pull out your phone from your other hoodie and hand it to Jason. "It died and in the chaos, I dropped my charging block." You offer a guilty smile as Jason takes your phone and plugs it into his charger. “So, uh, what’re you gonna do about Crane? Like….fuck.” You roll your eyes.

“Kill him.” Jason spits.

“No.” You shake your head. “I was serious. I wanna kill him.”

“Seriously?” Jason quips.

“Yes. I’m sick of people making you think you’re some fucking monster when you’re not. And he fucking sucks anyway. He did everything to you, he almost got Dick killed, he’s gotten innocent people killed, he almost killed me, and he killed or almost killed Tim. Yeah, I’d like to kill him.” You let out a sigh. “I mean, if you really want to kill him for what he did to you, go for it just let me get a shot in. If it’s for me? Let me do it.”

“It’s kind of fucked we’re even having this conversation right now.” Jason chuckles. “Fine. But, I get a few fucking shots in. I meant what I said, no one gets to fuck with you again.”

“And I meant what I said. No one gets to fuck with you, Jason Todd.” You offer him a sweet smile, something that should feel off given you're talking about killing someone but instead, it brings Jason some sort of comfort.

A smirk grows onto his lips before it turns soft. “Can handle myself.”

“Okay, no the fuck you cannot.” You quip back as you let out a soft laugh. “Just because you can though, doesn’t mean you have to do it alone. I got you.” You smile softly at him. "You and me."

Jason remembers a night a few months ago and he was sitting in the library reading because things were just a little too heavy and loud that day. You walked in and started scrapbooking on the floor just so Jason wouldn't be alone. And he remembers thinking how peaceful it was, just the two of you. He remembers thinking he felt lucky.

In a world where he experiences so much pain and unfairness, he felt lucky in that moment and in every moment he got to spend with you. As much as he loves to beat himself up, especially these days, he'd like to think maybe he can be lucky again. Maybe he can be at peace again one day. If you keep on thinking this and keep a hold on him. If you're willing to not let him do this alone, just as you said all those months ago in San Francisco, maybe you can get back to where you were and maybe you both can be lucky and at peace. Maybe the universe will offer some sort of kindness for the suffering it's caused you both.

“What about the Titans?” Jason asks, clearing his throat and swallowing his own thoughts.

“Right, yeah, I uh, I need to talk to Dick still. I told them it was Crane last night, not sure really if they believed me or not. Hope so. I’m sure Gar did so that’s at least good.” You nod your head a few times, hating the idea of having to explain this whole thing to Dick. You're kind of tired of being the mediator.

“We could just go take out Crane ourselves.” Jason suggests casually as he gets up and walks to the other side of the room where he has a mini fridge seated against the wall.

"While that does sound like fun," You laugh softly because you wish you could actually just do that. It would probably put an end to all of this but Dick would lose his shit. “I have an idea.”

“I hate when you say that.” Jason groans as he grabs two bottles of Gatorade and a box of granola bars from the top of the fridge before he walks back over to you. Jason tosses the box and one of the Gatorades at you before he plops down and scoots himself so his back rests against the wall, his legs extending in front of him. "Assumed you haven't eaten or had anything to drink." Jason explains, cracking open his Gatorade while you do the same.

"Yeah, I haven't thank you." You give him a soft smile before you start explaining yourself, grabbing a granola bar before you start your ramble. “Taking Crane out would be a fun time and he deserves it and most of our problems would likely be solved. However, what if Dick is right? What if he does have something bigger planned that we don’t know about? And then we kill him and like…maybe he poisons everyone somehow or blows up the city? I don’t know. We kind of need to know. And knowing his whereabouts would also be kind of helpful. So, what if you just….side with him still? Be the inside guy, right? And then Dick will really believe us that it wasn’t you who shot us and you won’t have to worry about Dick trying to turn you in, I wouldn’t let him but still.”

Jason pauses, holding the open bottle of Gatorade to his mouth. He's pretty sure you're suffering blood loss because that's insane. It's about as insane as you saying he should take the drug to not go through withdrawal. You're losing your sanity. "He already poisoned the water." Jason states.

"He did what now?" You blink at him.

"Your phone died, yeah. The water is poisoned with something he did so don't drink it. GCPD put out an alert this morning." Jason explains.

"Oh, that's fun. Well, still. It's Crane. You know he has something completely insane planned. Probably." You scoot closer to Jason, sitting on your knees right beside him.

“You want me to work with fucking Crane after he just tried to kill you? That’s fucking insane. Do you know that?” Jason questions with a groan. He wants nothing to do with Crane, even if he could get information from him.

“Yes.” You nod once.

“Fuck no.” Jason shakes his head in the same casual manner before snagging a granola bar.

“Jay, look, okay he thinks he can still manipulate you so let him think that and find out what he’s up to.”

“He won’t tell me shit.” Jason shakes his head in annoyance as he unwraps the granola bar.

“Maybe he will now. If he just tried to kill me and you go back to him anyway, right? Say I turned on you or whatever. That I think it was a setup against me so you wouldn’t have to be the one to pull that trigger. If he knows you’ll turn on me, maybe he’ll finally trust you enough to tell you what’s going on. You’re a pretty good liar sometimes.” You urge him and you know this is an insane idea but it's what you have. The Titans will never figure out Crane's plan without some inside help. They need it.

“You said I was shit liar.” Jason argues, pointing the granola bar at you.

“Well, to me.” You chuckle softly. “I always know when you’re lying but I think you can lie pretty well when you actually need to. I mean, no one figured out you were Robin. And I think that was obvious. I met you and all I thought was that it made sense.”

“This is fucking stupid.” Jason nods his head casually.

“Yeah, well, this whole thing has been fucking stupid. You go back to Crane, work with him and I’ll stay with the Titans. You call the burner when you find shit out and I loop Dick in. You don’t have to physically be home to work with us. You find out, the Titans bring in Crane and shut down whatever shit he’s got going on, then we kill him and you go home.” You explain simply and Jason hates just how convincing you can be.

You make a good point. Jason knows he can lie his ass off, he just wanted to argue. He's worried though because Crane has a way of knowing Jason is lying. It's how he found out about you from the beginning of it all. Jason couldn't just lie because Crane would know. It wasn't exactly a life-or-death situation then though. Maybe Jason wasn't trying all that hard to get away with lying then anyway. Crane admitting his plan would be helpful and Crane thinking you turned on Jason would give Jason enough motive to give up on the Titans entirely. It's not a horrible plan but Jason isn't happy about it.

“Alright fucking fine but this is shit and you know that.” Jason lets out a groan.

“I know.” You smile. “But, it’ll be worth it when his prodigie betrays him in the end.” You scrunch your nose, smiling with pride and Jason can see the light come back to your eyes. He thinks you're gonna be okay.

“You know, kinda hot when you got a plan all ready to go.” Jason offers you a cheeky smirk, his eyes raking over you before coming back to your face.

“I do have my moments.” You grin wickedly at him. “Kind of hot when you actually do what I say.”

“Alright, fuck you. Don't get used to it, babe.” Jason chuckles, shaking his head as the white streak flops onto his forehead. “When we doing this?”

“You could head out now, meet up with Crane and I’ll head back to the manor.” You suggest before taking a bite of your granola bar.

“Alright, just, uh, be careful, please. Let me know if shit happens with the Titans. I don’t want them attacking you for this shit.”

“I got it. I’ve been dealing with them the whole time. Don’t worry, Jay.” You smile softly a him as Jason gets to his feet and stands in front of you.

There's something dark in his eyes this time. He's standing over you as if he doesn't really want to leave. His brows are pinching together in the way they always do when he's worried and his jaw is squaring. He's putting all of the pressure onto his good leg, something you still notice immediately. But, he stands as if he's an unmovable force anyway and the smirk drops from his face.

“I’m serious, alright? Be careful.” Jason sucks in a breath and you've never seen him this kind of protective over you before.

“I will, promise.” You offer him a soft nod before Jason reluctantly heads out.

Jason is still hesitant, keeping his stance in front of you and it feels wrong. It always feels wrong to just leave. But, it's not his place to offer something else in place of him leaving anymore. And he also knows the second he walks back to Crane, that'll probably the last time you see each other until it's resolved. You're going to have to go to the Titans and Dick will likely be watching you closely, to make sure you don't get yourself killed or flip sides again. A lot can happen in a day or a few days and you were just almost killed. It scares the ever-living shit out of him, the very thought of losing you the way you lost him. He hates that he's leaving again. It's what he has to do and he knows that but knowing what he has to do to end this, doesn't make the decision any easier.

Jason leans down, placing his hand on your cheek before he rests his forehead against yours. Your eyes fall closed, a soft and subtle smile coming to your lips.

"Don't do anything fucking stupid and for once, listen to Dick and Gar, alright?" Jason asks, pulling just enough to see your face.

Your brows pull together. "You want me to listen to Dick?"

Jason is still mad at him and maybe Dick wants him dead still. That's always a possibility but something Jason knows, now that he's thinking with a clear head is that Dick does try to protect the Titans. They're his family and he's the leader. And Gar is one of your best friends. The two of them won't let anything happen to you if they can stop it. He knows you taking off had nothing to do with Gar and after last night, Jason thinks Gar would try to actually stop you if it happens again.

Jason's jaw squares, reluctant to say it again. "I'm serious. You got fucking shot." Jason quips.

"Okay." You agree softly, knowing if Jason is asking you to listen to anyone, you should probably take the advice. It always means Jason is very worried and serious. Two things that are a bit unsettling. "I will, promise." You smile softly before pressing your forehead to his for a second. "Now, go, okay? I'll be fine."

Jason nods his head, pulling away and dropping his hand. "I'll call when I find something out." Jason offers one last nod before he turns and darts out of the room.

Jason heads out to an old mechanic shop to meet up with Crane and for the life of him, he has no idea why he's even agreed to this. The only thing he wants to do right about now is kill Crane. He wants to fight him and shoot him and cause him horrendous pain for what he's put you through. He could have killed you and Jason swore no one would ever get away with it. But, now he has to walk in here and pretend he's not pissed about it. He's a good liar, but he doesn't know if he'll actually be able to withhold his blooming hatred.

When Jason meets with Crane, Crane seems to be acting perfectly normal, seemingly believing Jason will always be on his side no matter what. It's something Jason finds to be interesting because he already knew Crane was arrogant. But, he didn't think he was arrogant enough to think Jason would just be perfectly fine with him after being drugged, tricked, lied to, and used. He just shot Tim, possibly ruining his chances of actually going home. He could have killed you. Jason already threatened Crane but Crane seems perfectly fine with everything and Jason's wondering if that's because he agreed to meet.

"You could have fucking killed her." Jason starts with gritted teeth as they walk into the car garage.

"Yeah...sorry about that." Crane says casually. "She was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Sometimes, there are necessary casualties."

Crane is confident in his ability to manipulate Jason. Crane didn't have a single thing on the kid and Jason still spilled everything about Batman and the Titans. It was easy. It might become more difficult right now, but Crane is confident they'll overcome the current hurdle. After all, for the time being, Crane does still need Jason for his own disposal.

Jason wants to explode right here and take Crane out with him. A necessary causality? That's how you and Tim are being referred to? There is no such thing as a necessary causality when it comes to innocent people. Innocent people don't have to die. They don't have to be hurt. It was a choice Crane made in order to get you out of the way. To show Jason Crane is the one still running the show. And Jason has to stand here and pretend like this is all fine and lie. He's ready for this whole thing to be done and over with.

"You were right anyway." Jason sucks up his pride and do as you tell him. For that alone, Jason should get to kill him after this. "She was going to turn me in. It was all a setup, that's why she was even there."

Crane seems to perk up with Jason's words and he's hoping Crane believes him. "I did tell you she couldn't be trusted. That must be so hard to handle right now. But, see, now you know who has your back." Crane offers an eery smile. "Do I need to finish the job now?" Crane asks bluntly and he is definitely asking to gauge Jason's reaction. He doesn't miss the way Jason's hands turn into fists at his sides with his knuckles turning white.

"No." Jason states. "I'll do it." He states simply, releasing his hands.

"Good. Then you'll have nothing to worry about." Crane pats Jason's shoulder and Jason is ready to change the subject. He hopes that'll be enough bait for now.

"What the fuck is this?" Jason asks, switching the conversation as he looks around.

"This is where the victors go to rest their weary heads." Crane says.

"We didn't win." Jason argues. "They were gonna take me back but you fucked it all up." Sure, Crane did manage to poison the water but from where Jason is standing, it doesn't seem like too many people have been affected and with the alert going out, less people will likely drink the water. They didn't win anything.

"So you had a moment." Crane states simply, completely unbothered. "I've had plenty of them myself. Let bygones by bygones. I forgive you." Crane says before he pulls the cover off a yellow sports car. He lets out a sigh, as if to be pleased by the vehicle. "Sprezzatara."

Jason just rolls his eyes before he leans against the car, resting his back against the A frame. He's annoyed and he wants to get out of here. The hell if Crane forgiving him for? As far as Jason is concerned, he thinks getting him drugged was payback enough for him dealing the drug out behind his back. And Crane seems to be growing a little annoyed with him, too as he lets out a sigh before closing the garage door using the button hanging from a cable.

"Show some respect." Crane says sternly. "Sit." Crane depends, lightly gesturing towards a chair in front of a desk with a computer.

Jason does as told, sitting down and slouching in his seat.

"You know who Edward Bernays is?" Crane asks.

"The sauce guy?" Jason questions.

"Eggs and bacon." Crane says, taking a seat beside Jason. "Classic American breakfast. Do you know why?"

"What's this have to do with--"

"Pork farmers paid Edward Bernays to make it so. See, but Edward Bernays, he had this...this uncle, right? Dear old Uncle Sigmund. As in Sigmund Freud. See, and Freud taught Edward Bernays how the human mind worked. And Edward, he worked the human mind. He didn't sell the proletariat bacon. He sold them the idea that a hearty breakfast was what every doctor thought was best for them. After that, the bacon, it sold itself. Edward Bernays understood that an idea is the most powerful weapon we have." Crane explains before he swivels in his chair to face the computer, Jason eying him carefully and he's getting a really bad feeling about all of this. "It's not the product, it's how you sell it." Crane says as he brings up footage of Nightwing fighting some bad guys and Crane is in some type of editing software. "And Gotham is in need of a new product. We now interrupt your regularly scheduled program to bring you a message for the good people of Gotham.

Jason leans forward as the video starts to play, Crane already having sent it out as alert to every person in Gotham City.

Oh no.

prev. chapter | next chapter

series masterlist | masterlist | tag list

Tag list: @fairyofshampoo // @italiana-20 // @jasontoddsmentaldisorders // @purplerose291 // @lovelessamai // @makaelaseresin // @lenidaslenchen // @mayfieldss // @ghostkingblake // @im-done-with-this-im-out // @velvetskies // @lilylovelyxo // @cryinghotmess // @yesimwriting // @vivian-555 // @stainedstardom // @baebeepeach // @legend-o-zelda // @harleycao // @somehow-lovable-trash // @xx-all-purpose-nerd-xx // @deyja-the-duck // @jasontoddslover // @captainmarvels-blog // @totallynotkaibiased // @scarlovesyou // @whydoyoucare866 // @littlemeowmeow1000 // @ginger24880 // @septixtrash // @kplatzman // @urmomsgayforme5 // @killxz // @lovefks

#jason todd x reader #jason todd x you #red hood x reader #red hood x you #jason todd fanfic #jason todd fanfiction #titans fanfic #titans fanfiction #dc fanfic #dc fanfiction #petrichor

88 notes · View notes

greenerteacups · 10 months ago

Note

If there was one major plot element that you could change in the original canon what would it be?

The Marauders' deaths. With the exception of James, I don't think any of the Marauders die in a way that's narratively suitable — or, to be more particular, they die in a way suitable for a narrative I don't like very much. James is an acceptable (though, obviously, tragic) death to me because it completes his arc: he's an obnoxious, arrogant bully who grows into a selfless soldier on the side of the light, and lays down his life as a final gesture of abnegation. It's not Proust, but it's good, right? His death represents a symbolic triumph over Voldemort because it's something Voldemort would never do.

None of the others make the same kind of sense for their subplots. Sirius dies at the Ministry because Harry fucks up and lets his abandonment issues override his judgment, and while that's a compelling moment for Harry — whose hamartia is a trauma-forged combination of hot-headedness and desperate fear of losing people — it's not for Sirius. Sirius's problem in Book 5 is that he's emotionally stunted by his years of imprisonment and refuses to grow up, because he's clinging to the life he thinks — rightly — he should have gotten to have. This is made painfully clear in the Department of Mysteries, wherein some of his last words to Harry are "Nice one, James!" He refuses to treat Harry like the child he is, and he keeps acting like he's this fun-uncle type, blowing off rules and pissing off Mom (Molly), because that's the dynamic he should have had with Harry if Lily and James had lived. Sirius doesn't want to be Harry's guardian and role model. He wants a brother and a nephew, and he's trying to force Harry to be both, because he's all he has left of that family. His death doesn't tie any of those threads; they're left dangling. That's a valid narrative move — every death cuts a story short, and you can't give everybody an arc — but I loved Sirius. Giving Harry the "grieving loss of a parent" arc that was originally meant for Ron (Arthur was the original Big Death of the OOTP, in JKR's drafts) also means that Ron spends a lot of Book 6 without anything to do, whereas Harry goes through what's essentially a more intense version of the grieving-and-recovery arc he did after Cedric's death.

Remus, on the other hand, is just — first off, a Mess, I agree with so few of the choices made with Remus in the later books, but let's say he's deep in the trauma, the grieving, and whatever living among werewolves as a spy does for your mental health. So he gets into this will-they-won't-they with Tonks, gets married, tries to abandon pregnant wife, then goes back and gets to be with his wife and son for about half a year before dying, with said wife, in battle. Okay. So like:

I think the Remus Weirdness in Book 7 is actually an attempt to close a plot hole, which is that the Horcrux Hunt happens completely without adult supervision, despite the fact that there are lots of adults the Golden Trio could and should ask for help. Harry's insistence that he doesn't want to risk anyone's life except for Ron and Hermione's is, while understandable as a character move, utterly ridiculous, because the other Order members are risking their lives anyway. One of the biggest holes is Remus and Tonks, who are (a) both already targets for Voldemort because of who they are, and so have nothing to lose, but also (b) both care for Harry on a personal level, and would never accept his reasons for pushing them away. So Teddy Lupin is conceived in order to bench Tonks, who's safely out of commission while pregnant. But that leaves Remus, who probably in fact would have super complicated torn-loyalty feelings about the situation, and who is scarred and traumatized and probably has enough abandonment issues to try and walk out, but — in my view — never resolves any of those things. He doesn't suddenly realize that he loves Tonks and wants to be with her, or feel a sense of duty to his son; when Harry's justly furious at Remus abandoning his kid in Harry's name, Remus gets pissy about it and goes "well, if you don't want my help, fine," and leaves. Which is, again, fine, a character flaw, it's childish, he's allowed to be, and he is, in fact, similar to Sirius and James — but it left a bad taste in my mouth, because that's one of the last conversations we get with Remus, and it's such an impoverished vision of his bonds with others. It doesn't delve deeply into why he loves Tonks or Harry, or the substance of his conflict between them; like always with the Marauders, he just invokes James, and Harry throws James's name right back at him, and it ends there.

And then he dies, so that baby Teddy Lupin can be an orphan, and we can do a parallel to baby Harry Potter. Even though we don't see Teddy Lupin on the page ever, so we have no idea what that comparison means, or how their experiences compliment or contrast one another, or literally anything more substantive than the series beginning and ending on the same event. Which: great. Okay. To quote a Roger Ebert review that I think about, on average, once every thirty-six hours:

"J.K. Rowling has learned from better novels that authors sometimes create narrative parallels, but she has not learned why."

#greenteacup asks #sirius black #remus lupin

34 notes · View notes

beecreeper · 7 months ago

Note

Ask ya back 24, 41, 67, 76, 105

Yippee!! Answer under cut

24. How does your Tav feel about Mol and her friends?

Briar super doesn't care. She didn't meet Mol at the Grove because she just ignored all of the children entirely. She was too focused on "get this tadpole OUT" to talk to pretty much any of the tieflings because she just didn't care. For some reason (I think because she didn't stop Rolan from going to Baldur's Gate on his own?), none of the kids besides Mol made it to Last Light. When she does talk to Mol she lowkey likes how much spunk the kid has but overall has no strong feelings one way or the other.

Molli however LOVES the kids. She accidentally pissed Mol off at first by walking into the hideout (then Mol lied to guards and got Wyll arrested it was funny af), but Molli wins her over when she's nice to all the other kids and saves Arabella and Mirkon. Molli thinks Mol is a smart kid with a big heart who just needs to find a better outlet and to stay the FUCK away from Raphael. Kinda reminds her of her sister. She would die for those kids.

Ferox has no idea how to act around the kids. He doesn't trust himself around them. He's worried that Mol is going down a bad road that's gonna get her into a lot of trouble someday.

41. Which way did they take? Did they run into Elminster? What was their opinion of his news for Gale?

Briar took the underdark because OF COURSE she did. She didn't even go back and do the creche. Ran into Elminster without Gale in the party, which is very very funny because he uses nothing but $10 words and a solid 30 seconds to ask "Do you know Gale?". Briar hates Elminster so so so much for the same reasons she hates Gale and honestly would have tried to just walk on past but someone else let it slip that they do, in fact, know Gale. She spent the whole conversation between Gale and Elminster wishing she could kill both of them, if not herself. She super does not care about Mystra's order for Gale. Glad they won't have to feed him magic things anymore. Thinks he had better not detonate that thing at a time that's inconvenient to her. Briefly starts idly fantasizing if there's some way she can use this to murder a whole bunch of people at once.

Molli's path choice was a little more complicated. She and the party all agreed that the underdark sounded like the better bet, but she also needed to go do the creche first. After things at the creche fell through, she went back down through the underdark, hoping that it would have a path directly to Moonrise. Molli was star struck meeting Eliminster and didn't mind him mooching all that cheese because that's *Elminster* (and also because she would do the same thing). Soured on him a bit with the Mystra stuff though. Like she knows it's not *his* idea, but she thinks that he was too accepting of Mystra's command as reasonable. She refuses to accept that Gale blowing himself up is the only way. There's GOTTA be something else.

Ferox's gonna do the mountain pass and probably avoid the underdark entirely unless something compels him to backtrack. He'll think Elminster is a little pompous and presumptuos. He's gonna be more accepting of Mystra's order though. He thinks it's bullshit and that gods *shouldn't* be able to command that kinda thing, but also that she's not *wrong*. If a god says that they'll need to blow up the Absolute to beat it, it might end up being true. It's sad that Gale would be the price for that, but war and battle has its prices.

67. Does your Tav meet Tara? What's their opinion?

Pfffff Briar met Tara, immediately recognized her as Gale's cat he wouldn't shut up about, and then deliberately scared her off to be a bitch.

Molli hasn't met Tara yet, but even if she doesn't do it the official way in game, I want her to stumble across Tara somehow anyway. Molli likes Tara, thinks it's charming to see her treat Gale like she's his mother.

Ferox would honestly think that it's a little weird that a *cat* is acting like Gale's mom. He just can't get over the fact that she's a *cat*. But fine whatever he won't judge.

76. Does your Tav tell Dame Aylin about Lorroaken? Do they help her fight him?

Briar let Shadowheart kill Dame Aylin... she rolled up into Lorroaken's tower, told him "lol that relic you wanted so bad is super dead k bye" and then robbed him blind.

Molli is definitely gonna help kill that mother fucker.

I haven't decided for Ferox yet. It'll depend on which way Shadowheart ends up falling. If Dame Aylin survives Act 2, Ferox is definitely killing Lorroken though.

105. Anything you want to say about your Tav! Give a random headcanon, answer a random question, say whatever you want!

I am SHOCKED that I haven't gotten an opportunity to say favorite food anywhere so I'm gonna do that. Briar likes fried chicken hearts (or, you know, just hearts in general), Molli likes baked brie with jam, and Ferox likes grilled leeks and dwarf meat.

#tav molli #durge briar #durge ferox #text posts

1 note · View note

plant-flwrs · 4 years ago

Note

Hi, so i was about to send a request, but my phone went all crazy and i don't know if it got send or not ): so here it goes again I was wondering if i could get a George x slytherin reader after the war, where they're dating but all his family disapproves because she had like this "bad reputation", so he gets sad and angry because this boy is super in love with her, and she is like super reserved so his family don't trust her, but she is actually such a sweetheart with him.

family is complicated // george weasley

masterlist!

a/n: this was so hard writing the weasleys as mean people omg. i love reading fics where everyone is happy at the burrow and molly is an angel so this was like tearing me apart lol. hope you like it!!

summary: The Weasley’s have never liked George’s girlfriend, and one snide remark makes George finally lose it.

also a disclaimer! family turmoil and drama ahead, so if that’s triggering to anyone, don’t read this one! <3

(3.5k)

--------

The sun was hidden away, tucked behind the dark clouds that littered the sky in London. It wouldn’t have mattered anyways, as the heavy curtains to your flat were drawn closed.

The sheets were in a pool around your ankles and your body shivered tirelessly. George always got warm at night and had a habit of kicking off the blankets in his sleep. You clung onto him, trying to collect some of his warmth that oozed from his shirtless chest.

Your eyes opened, feeling awfully heavy in their sockets. You didn’t want to wake up, you didn’t want to get out of bed, you didn’t want to get ready, and you didn’t want to go to the Burrow.

The Weasleys were nice to everyone but you, it felt like. They welcomed Harry, Hermione, and Angelina with open arms, but you and Fleur were the spousal outcasts. The two of you bonded over it quite often, trying to make jokes of it, but really it bothered you both quite deeply. The only difference between you and the other spouses was the green tie you wore around your neck for seven years. You hardly found that to be reason enough for the whole family to dislike you, but they didn’t.

You turned away from your boyfriend, bringing the blankets up from your ankles and wrapping them tightly around yourself. You pushed your face deeper into the pillow, hoping that if you slept all day you wouldn’t have to do the adult thing of going to your boyfriend’s family house.

George lifted the blankets from his side, moving under them with you. He glanced at the clock on your bedside table, and saw no harm in sleeping a little longer. His warm arms found their place around you, and the two of you fell back asleep with the intentions of avoiding the Weasleys.

“They’re going to be late! I bet she’ll get him into some kind of trouble!” Ginny and the rest of her siblings could hear their mother’s shrieking voice from upstairs.

“They’re still not here?” Ginny turned to face Harry, rolling over in the small bed they shared the previous night.

“ ‘Spose not,” he mumbled bringing two heavy hands to his face and blocking out the sunlight creeping into the room.

“No wonder,” Ginny said, sitting up slowly in bed, “I wouldn’t feel inclined to come if I were her.”

“Well, George loves her,” Harry defended, finding the conversation to be one they had often.

Harry was never one to befriend Slytherins in school, but his maturing age made him able to see past the house’s reputation. He knew you couldn’t be evil if George liked you so much.

“I know he does,” Ginny snapped, “but that doesn’t make her any less,” Ginny trailed off, unable to find the right words for a moment, “weird.”

Harry sighed, feeling awake after the conversation. He brought his feet to the cold wooden floor of Ginny’s childhood room, and placed his glasses on his face. The two went down for breakfast.

“When do you think they’ll grace us with their presence?” Fred teased from his spot next to Angelina at the table.

“Whenever she feels like it,” Mr. Weasley grumbled from the head of the table, his eyes locked on the newspaper in front of him.

Fred groaned, rolling his eyes. He quite liked you. He thought that if his brother liked you, then he should too, and he had no reason to dislike you. Your ‘bad reputation’ that his mother likes to bring up so often, was for the same reason he and George had a ‘bad reputation’. You and George shared a love for mischief, and the Weasleys disapproved.

“When did you tell them to come, mum?” Bill asked from his spot next to Fleur.

Fleur was the one who wanted to know, but she had learned it was better to let Bill do the talking for her with Mrs. Weasley.

“Around supper,” she replied, moving to stand behind Bill and fidget with his long hair. He jerked from his mother’s prying hands.

“Then why are you expecting them to be here now?” Fred asked, ignoring Angelina’s warning graze on his knee.

“Everyone else is!” Mrs. Weasley defended.

“Yeah, but you didn’t tell them to get here when everyone else was,” Fred continued, giving his mother a confused look.

“You eat your breakfast, young man, and stop worrying about what I said or didn’t say,” she yelled, darting back into the kitchen to get another pan full of eggs.

Fred caught Bill’s and Fleur’s eyes from across the table and they all looked annoyed.

You and George finally managed to roll out of bed a little after noon. The two of you stumbled down the cold streets hand in hand, still in your pajamas. You were in search of something to eat for lunch, even though you were both due at the Burrow in a couple of hours. You hated going with an empty stomach, because when you would load your plate up with Molly’s wonderful cooking, she would send you glares. You also hated going on a full stomach, because when you didn’t fill your plate with Molly’s wonderful cooking, she would send you glares. You rather her think you didn’t like her cooking than give her the opportunity to comment on your eating habits. You would watch Ginny shovel serving after serving into her mouth, and all Molly would do is pinch her cheeks and call her adorable.

You had gotten used to the criticisms pretty early on. You and George were an odd pairing, so you didn’t expect an immediate connection to the family. However, you had figured that after five years they may have warmed up to you, but sadly they hadn’t.

George pulled you into a small café by your hand, leading you to a secluded table by the window. The two of you put in your orders, and enjoyed the serenity before having to go to what was now both your least favorite place.

You wore a flattering sweater tucked into some smart pants. Clasping a delicate gold necklace George had given you for your anniversary last year, you called out to him to see if he was ready.

He came out of the bathroom, hands busy with buttoning his shirt. He was nervous, he usually was when he saw his family these days, and his hands had a shake in them.

“Here,” you said soothingly, running your hands over the wrinkles in the shirt and moving his hands away.

You finished buttoning the shirt, and George admired you.

Here you were, comforting him, when it was you his family didn’t like. You were willing to make more of an effort than his family ever did, and he loved you so much for that.

You stepped away from him, and his fingers moved up to brush a stray piece of hair out of your eyes. His rough fingertips grazed the top of your ear as he tucked away the hair. His hand fell down to the necklace you wore, and he twisted it in his fingers,

“I love you,” he whispered, blinking slowly, as if he were trying to remember this moment forever.

George always had the fear that any trip home could be the end for the two of you. He loved you, and he knew you loved him, but he couldn’t blame you if the hatred got too much for you.

“I love you too, Georgie,” you smiled up at him, forcing away the nausea pooling in your gut.

You went to your fireplace, checking the clock on the wall to make sure you weren’t too early and not too late. The both of you erupted in green flames, and soon the delightful smells of a homecooked meal flooded your nose.

“George!” Ron called from his spot on the couch, spotting you two first.

“Hey,” George responded in a voice you knew was trying to sound happy but came out shaky.

You stepped from the fireplace, and Molly rushed from the kitchen with her apron still on.

“My baby!” she wrapped her arms around George, pulling away and cupping his face with her hand.

He smiled down at her, and you recognized the nerves in the smile.

“Hi, Mrs. Weasley,” you said from beside George, waving and smiling shyly at her.

“Hello,” she started, already looking for something about you to be displeased with.

“Y/n! George!” Bill called, entering the house with Fleur trailing behind him.

You knew they liked to escape to the garden when they had to spend any amount of prolonged time at the Burrow, you and George joined them some times.

“Hi!” you said excitedly, not missing Molly’s scowl in the corner of your eyes.

Bill wrapped his long arms around you, hugging you like a brother. You released him and hugged Fleur next. Those would probably be the only Weasley’s that offered you a hug, as per usual.

“Where’s Fred?” George asked once he was released by his father’s arms.

“He and Angelina went upstairs for a nap a few hours ago,” Molly said, rushing back into the kitchen.

“Did you want any help, Mrs. Weasley?” she turned on her heal, gave you a fake smile, and shook her head.

If anyone else had called her Mrs. Weasley, she would have insisted they call her Molly, but not you.

“A nap? Blimey, how old are they?” George joked.

Laughs echoed around the room, and George wrapped an arm around your waist.

The two of you stood in the living room next to Bill and Fleur, talking with Ron, Harry, and Hermione on the couch.

“Fred tells us the shops going well?” Harry said, looking to George.

“Yeah, we’re doing alright,” George replied modestly. You flickered your eyes up at him, admiring him from where you stood tucked into his side. The shop was doing amazing, it was more successful than it had ever been.

“How’s your work, Y/n?” Hermione asked politely, and an awkward haze fell across the room as they all looked at you.

No one usually addressed you at Weasley family gatherings, so you were caught off guard.

“Good,” you choked out, clearing your throat and furrowing your brow, “it’s good.”

“She was just promoted,” George said proudly from beside you, nudging a finger into your side, “that Slytherin ambition of hers.”

“Really? Congratulations,” Harry said, the first and only person to say anything.

Bill and Fleur didn’t say anything because they already knew. The four of you had taken up having dinners at your flat sometimes, finding it better for all of you than the large gatherings at the Burrow.

“George!” Fred bellowed from the staircase.

He hugged his brother, hitting him on the back as they embraced. You smiled politely at Angelina, who nodded her head curtly at you.

“Y/n!” Fred said once he released George, hugging you.

Angelina’s eyes bore into Fred’s back as he did, but he didn’t care.

You smiled brightly at Fred, feeling relieved to have his happiness there. He and George were always the first to stick up for you when it came to Molly.

“Dinner!”

You all gathered around three tables put together in the garden, watching as dishes of food were levitated across the table. You served yourself food, catching Mrs. Weasley watching you with a critical eye from her spot at the head of the table.

Conversation flowed, though you, George, Fleur, and Bill generally kept to yourselves.

Bill sat at the other head of the table, with Fleur to his right and you to his left. George sat next to you, and the four of you talked like it was one of your usual dinners at your flat. It was better this way, less room for conflict.

All you had to do was make it through desert, which was moved into the house. That was it, one last meal and then you and George could say goodnight and be in the safety of your own home.

“Oh, I don’t think you want any of this dear,” Molly said to you, pulling away with a plate of cake in her hands,

“Mum,” George warned, holding his hand out for the plate while the other wrapped around your shoulders protectively.

You were never one to stop George from sticking up for you, which made Mrs. Weasley angrier. She looked to you, expecting you to give up the fight and not want any cake, but you looked right back at her with a blank look.

“She had an awful lot at dinner, George, she must be full.”

“Mum,” George said, louder and more angry.

“Don’t take that tone with your mother,” Mr. Weasley came from behind his wife, placing two comforting hands on her shoulders.

“Don’t speak to my girlfriend like that, and I won’t,” he responded, managing to sound somewhat calm, though a sharpness was in his tone.

“Excuse you?” Mr. Weasley questioned, his face becoming stern.

“George, let it go-” Ginny started from where she sat with Harry, the first one to take notice of the argument developing.

“No!” George said harshly to Ginny, whipping his head to look at her.

“What’s wrong?” Fred asked from behind you, shoveling cake into his mouth.

“Mum and dad are being rude to Y/n,” George started, looking accusingly at his parents, “for what? The millionth time?”

Mrs. Weasley gasped, putting down the cake on the counter next to her.

“George!” she exclaimed, prepared to make excusing defenses in her honor.

“It’s true mum,” Fred said from behind his brother, voice muffled by the cake in his mouth, “you’ve been, and usually are, quite rude to Y/n. And Fleur.”

You and Fleur made eye contact, both of your eyes widening as you realized tonight was the night where everything went to shit. No more passive aggressive comments, no more pretending everything was fine. After this, your invitation to the Burrow might be permanently revoked.

“He’s right, mum,” Bill’s cool voice said from beside Fleur, and everyone’s gaze shot to him, “you have it out for Y/n and Fleur.”

You stepped back, and George followed you, his arm still around you. It was like a triangle in the room, Mr. and Mrs. Weasley at the edge of the kitchen, Bill and Fleur by the fireplace, and you, George, and Fred edging nearer the staircase.

“I don’t know what you talking about,” Molly defended, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Yes you do,” George said, narrowing his eyes at his parents.

“It’s late,” Mr. Weasley said, “maybe you lot should go home now.”

George scoffed from beside you, unwrapping his arm from your shoulder and stepping forward.

“Okay, Fleur, Y/n, why don’t you two go back to our flat,” George said in a soothing voice, “and we’ll talk this out, like a family.”

You fought the proud smile that wanted to spread across your face, and nodded your head. Fred guided you to the fireplace with a hand on your back, and winked at you as you and Fleur erupted in green flames once again.

“Well, this is not going to end well,” you mumbled to Fleur once you got home, putting a kettle on the stove, preparing enough water for George and Bill if they eventually came back too.

The yelling coming from the Burrow was unlike anything the small village had ever heard. Shouts of anger drifted from the windows, and the intensity of the argument could be felt for miles.

“You have no right to treat them the way you do!” Bill shouted at his parents, and also casted an accusing glance at Ginny, Ron, Hermione, and Angelina. Harry had sunk into the couch, the only person still sitting as everyone else sprang to their feet.

“She’s not right for him, and Fleur’s not right for you!” Molly screamed back.

“You don’t get to decide that! I love her, Bill loves Fleur. What’s different about them? You love Hermione, you love Angelina, you love Harry. Why should Y/n and Fleur have to get the shit end of your behavior!” George yelled, waving his hands frantically.

“Y/n doesn’t even try with us!” Ginny interrupted, stepping closer to George, “She just talks to you and Fleur!”

“Because none of you ever gave her a chance! She tried so hard the first time I brought her here, and you all made her leave crying!”

Ron and Harry felt a pang of guilt at the thought of the remarks they had made about Slytherins the first time George took you to the Burrow.

“I don’t trust her,” Molly said, her voice stern but quiet.

“I frankly don’t care, mum. I love her. If you’re going to make me choose, I’ll choose her. Every time. I love her,” George said, his voice lowered and shaky.

“Me too, I’ll choose Fleur,” Bill spoke up, moving his wand from his pocket to prepare to apparate.

“Boys,” Arthur warned, stepping forwards and trying to soothe the situation, “don’t upset your mother.”

“Let them go! They’ve made their choices!” Molly pouted, moving to sit, defeated, at the table.

“Fine. Send me an owl if you ever come to your senses,” George said, moving towards the fireplace and picking up a handful of floo powder.

“Fleur and I have given you enough chances, don’t send us an owl. Goodbye,” Bill said finitely, apparating before anyone could say anything.

George hesitated in the fireplace, meeting everyone’s guilty looking expression. No one spoke up, and he nodded towards Fred, saying goodbye. He was back home in seconds.

You and Fleur turned to the men who had both just appeared in your living room. Bill had tears running down his face, and Fleur went to him immediately. Fleur looked to you and you pointed down the hall towards you and George’s bedroom, allowing them a place to have some privacy. George fell onto the couch next to you, and you went to the kitchen to bring him a cup of tea.

“What happened?” you spoke in a soft tone,

George retold everything, and you felt your throat closing as tears threatened your eyes.

“Oh, George,” you mumbled, taking his tea from his hands and placing it on the coffee table You held him, the both of you feeling exhausted. His upper body leaned into your lap, and you held his shoulders, soothing bits of his hair off his face.

You could hear the muffled voices of Bill and Fleur from your bedroom.

Suddenly, five people apparated into your living room. George sat up, and you grasped his hand as you looked at Harry, Ginny, Hermione, Ron, and Fred all standing awkwardly in your living room.

“Nice place,” Ron said suddenly, craning his neck to look around the room.

Neither you or George responded and Hermione nudged Ron with her elbow.

“Right, sorry,” he mumbled, his lips going into a thin line.

“We wanted to say something,” Fred said, breaking apart from the group and coming to sit with you and George on the couch.

He turned around, looking at the group.

“We’re sorry,” Harry said first, looking at you, “I should have never said those things about Slytherins, it was stupid and so was I.”

You swallowed hard, eyes downcast at the floor.

“So am I. I actually think you’re quite cool,” Ron said, sounding just as awkward as you remembered him to be in school.

“I never meant to make you feel uncomfortable. I’m sorry I stood back and let you get treated that way,” Hermione said next, and you met her sorrowful gaze. You nodded at her, returning your eyes to the floor.

Harry nudged Ginny, who reluctantly spoke, “I’m sorry too. If George loves you, then so do I.”

You smiled at the floor, nerves twisting in your stomach like they did when you first went to the Burrow.

“You guys were idiots,” George said sternly from besides you.

Your shoulders shook, and George lifted your chin with his fingers. He met your eyes, afraid you were crying, but was happy to see you laughing.

You looked at the group, chuckling senselessly.

“Thank you,” you said, “it’s a shame you’ll have to do that whole bit again for Bill and Fleur, though.”

Everyone laughed, and the group hadn’t realized Bill and Fleur weren’t there anymore.

“Did they leave already?” Fred asked from beside you.

“No, there in our room for some privacy,” you answered, pointing a finger down the hall.

“Ah,” Fred said, wiggling his eyebrows.

“Not like that,” George reached behind you and hit the back of Fred’s head.

You stood, going to the kitchen and retrieving all the mugs you had in your cabinets.

“Need some help?” Ginny asked from behind you, Hermione by her side.

“Sure,” you smiled at them, and Ginny and Hermione moved into the kitchen.

They helped you carry out the hot cups of tea, placing them on the table. Bill and Fleur had emerged from the room, and were sat on the couch. You sat on the other side of Fleur, catching George’s eyes from where he sat on an armchair across from you.

He looked happy, finally being able to sit with his family and you in the same room without nerves plaguing his every thought.

#george #weasley #george weasley #george weasley fic #george weasley fanfiction #george weasley imagine #george weasley x y/n #george weasley x reader #george weasley x slytherin!reader #george weasley x you #harry potter

1K notes · View notes

carriagelamp · 4 years ago

Photo

The tops books I read over the 2020 – you know, what I could fit in between the entire world collectively losing its mind and a literal plague being unleashed on us.

This is ridiculously late, but my new year was just too busy to get this done and fight with tumblr over uploading x.x so here it finally is. I won’t go into detail about them, because I did that in my various monthly reviews, but (with the exception of Crave which was unspeakably bad but made the list because it was strangely iconic for my summer this year) this assortment of novels, novellas, comics, and manga were all fantastic reads that I would recommend people check out!

The list in a not-picture form:

A Beautiful Day In The Neighborhood by Fred Rogers – a collection of illustrated poems from Mister Rogers

Belle Révolte by Linsey Miller – most recent queer novel by one of my favourite authors, about magic and science and war and medicine

Behind The Scenes by Bisco Hatori – a manga series by the creator of Ouran Highschool Host Club, a great coming-of-age story about a students in the theatre prop department

Binti by Nnedi Okorafor – a scifi novella about the first of the Himba people to leave for space after being accepted into the most prestige university in the galaxy

The Bromelaid Trilogy by Terry Pratchett – a series about a dying race of nomes who discover there’s more of them than they thought and more to the world than they imagined

Crave by Tracy Wolff – worst paranormal romance book I’ve ever read, derivative of, somehow, everything, do not fucking bother

The Deep by Rivers Solomon – a novella about a race of deep sea mermaids and how they cope with the traumatic history of their people

Doll Bones by Holly Black – a story about a group of kids as they struggle with growing beyond playing make believe and a ghost that may or may not be haunting them

Flawed Dogs by Berkeley Breathed – a story about dogs and how they survive in against the human standards of perfection and beauty, both hilarious and traumatically brutal

FRNCK by Olivier Bocquet & Brice Cossu – a French graphic novel series about a boy who accidentally falls back into prehistory and is adopted, somewhat reluctantly or at least with great confusion, by a family of cavemen

Ghost Hunters Adventure Club and the Secret of the Grand Chateau by Dr Cecil H. H. Mills – a Hardy Boys satire written by the Game Grumps which was probably the funniest book I read all year, I would highly recommend it even as someone with zero interest in the Game Grumps.

Gregor the Overland by Suzanne Collins – Gregor discovers a hidden world under New York populated by giant animals and strange humans that are determined to draw him into their political turmoil

The Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson – I feel like I read this ten years ago. The novel that the Netflix series was loosely based on, a very cool horror with fascinating themes built into the subtext

Kings, Queens, and In-Betweens by Tanya Boteju – a Canadian slice-of-life novel about a young queer teen falling into the LGBT scene for the first time and figuring out friendship, love, and who she is

The Last Book On The Left by Marcus Parks, Henry Zebrowski, and Ben Kissel. True crime stories with a comedic twist, adapted from their podcast The Last Podcast On The Left.

Lupin III: World’s Most Wanted #3 by Monkey Punch – anyone on this blog knows I fell hard for Lupin this year. A goofy series about a world class thief and his team.

The Marrow Thieves by Cherie Dimaline – probably the best book of the year for me. A post-apocolypse story based around the horror of residential schools, climate change, and illness

Midnight Sun by Stephenie Meyers – look I loved the Twilight series too much as a teen when it was first coming out not to have gone head over heels for this. Unabashedly loved it.

No Fixed Address by Susin Nielsen – a Canadian novel about child poverty and homelessness, more light-hearted and hopeful than it sounds

The One And Only Ivan by Katherine Applegate – a gorilla that’s spent his entire life placidly living in a tiny mall exhibit meets a new friend and suddenly has something bigger to live for and protect

Our Dreams At Dusk by Shimanami Tasogare – one of the best queer manga series I’ve ever read, super artsy and focuses on the different complicated experiences by a number of different characters

River of Teeth by Sarah Gailey – alternative history novella about a gay gunslinger and his team of hippo-cowboys in Louisana as they go on the biggest heist of their careers - so worth the read, this was tons of queer fun

Sanity & Tallulah by Molly Brooks – a graphic novel about the hijinks two young children (and aspiring mad scientists) can get up to on their space station home

The Witcher: The Last Wish by Andrzej Sapkowski – can you believe The Witcher came out this year? Anyway, the novels were fucking amazing, some of the best high fantasy I’ve read in years

79 notes · View notes

violet-t-9 · 4 years ago

Text

Check in on my (not very realistic) wish list for episode 141

1. Blooming Grove Clay family reunion! Hugs and tears! Home-cooked meal and tea! Much needed relaxation and downtime after saving the world.

Ay that was a nice meal and a good night’s sleep.

2. Widogast’s Nascent Nein (9!) Sided Tower because Caleb still has a spell slot for that! So many cats and books. Also, rooms for Essek and Molly (9!). Bonus: seeing more rooms on the 8th floor of the tower?

Oof well thanks Trent now we don’t get to see the tower again, ever. I’m 100% sure that Essek will see his room during the Aeorian study fun times and Luc and Yeza will see their rooms in magical summer camp with professor Widogast though, so I’m happy.

3. Check in and visiting Allura to return her staff and Kima’s Holy Avenger (”hey we saved the world killed Lucien stopped the city Allura are you proud of us? You are? Tell us who is on the Tal’Dorei council.”)

They mentioned it, but they didn’t play it out, unfortunately. Alas, the members of the Tal’Dorei council shall forever remain a mystery.

4. Check in and visiting Yussa and Wensforth to apologize for their last visit to the Tidepeak Tower and using his emergency exit plan, but Yussa being too grateful to be saved from a screaming city hivemind to care.

Yep, thank you Caleb for remembering Yussa lol. Should have known that he would want to study the Happy Fun Ball... Wizards sharing knowledge, how nice! Also, Veth’s goodbye to Wensforth was very sweet.

5. Molly getting more and more of his memory back and slowly becoming his old flamboyant self.

I... wow I mean I guess Kingsley? This technically happened? He is going to become someone new, which is always exciting! He got a lot of... interesting memories back too. He is also interested in learning about Molly’s memory too, even though he is somebody else (and just as flamboyant).

6. Caleb says goodbye to Frumpkin and there is either a sweet farewell or Frumpkin just goes “nah fam I choose my wizard you can’t get rid of me”.

Aw Frumpkin didn’t feel ready to leave at first... :( The actual farewell was indeed short and sweet, I loved it.

7. Beau and Yasha moments, conversations, fun times, shameless PDA, or potentially fade to black because they deserve it.

Camping outside at night, aw. Their moment after the Zeenoth trial was very touching as well! “Yes, my love?” and “my Expositor” lol how romantic they are. They are planning to settle down and explore Yasha’s past together! Their honeymoon little trip! Also, “I will have you and then some” was indeed hot.

8. Jester and Fjord being domestic, adorable and sharing kisses/conversations or potentially fade to black because they deserve it.

The sleep snuggle was soo cute and Jester’s love admission was adorable! Also the rain and double confession wow Fjord what a romantic man. Their conversation in Nicodranas was sooo cute guys. They planned boat trips!

9. Caleb and Essek have a long one-on-one conversation about their “it’s complicated” relationship and have some more physical contact (still reeling from the forehead touch last episode).

Caleb attempting to include Essek in the globe of invulnerability and Essek dragging Caleb away from melee combat aw. The kiss on the cheek and the empathetic hug... I will take the time travel conversation as well.

10. Veth, Yeza and Luc’s joyful/tearful family reunion and happy fun times in which Veth and Yeza may or may not celebrate in private.

Aw that was a nice reunion, so very cute. Veth gets to fully return home to her family after saying goodbye! I’m going to assume that she celebrates her return with Yeza in private.

11. Cad’s moments with his family and also with Molly (because it’s fun to watch them on screen together and conversing let’s be real).

Caduceus gets to be with his family now, enjoying life at the blooming grove! He deserves the relaxation!

12. Jester’s reunion with her mother with big hugs and finding out that parent trap TM has succeeded thanks to her genius plans. Also, the gentleman being a super awkward but loving dad.

Yes I knew it would work! The gentleman is a nervous drinker confirmed lol. The mother-daughter talk was very nice and a great reminder!

13. The Mighty Nein plans for the future: getting rid of Cloven Crystal, Fjord visiting Vandran (with Jester probably, who discusses Tusk Love with him) and maybe Sabian? Yasha’s plan to bring flower to Zuala (trip with Beau?). Beau’s plans regarding Zeenoth’s trial (has that happend yet? Does she want to go?) and Caleb’s plans for the assembly (or even further ahead, magical school? Aeorian research with Kryn Colleague? How pissed is Ludinus Da’leth?)

Well, the empire siblings sure started a task force against the assembly huh. Also yeah Caleb you tell him, F**k your vacancy Martinet Ludinus Da’leth! Professor Caleb will teach Luc. Astrid would be more interested in the position anyways. Fjord got to visit Vandran with Jester and got him to join their sailing adventures! Jester also talks about Tusk Love with him wow. Beau testified against Zeenoth with Yasha by her side! Yasha gave flowers to Zuala on a trip with Beau! Caleb and Essek got to do their Aeorian research study! Fjord’s cloven crystal adventure was also addressed! I’m so good at predictions you guys I KID YOU NOT I predicted everything.

14. Getting an update about Astrid and Eadwulf to find out that they are in fact doing fine because Trent is in deep trouble and under heavy investigation by the Augen Trust and Cobalt Soul (bonus: Trent is already starting to get what he deserves. Or even better, Trent has died from liver failure in jail. Like his jaundice really kept getting worse so one can hope I guess?)

F**k you Trent, you just had to show up and ruin everything didn’t you. Well, Astrid and Eadwulf are fne now, and Trent IS in deep trouble and rotting in jail. Still hoping that he will die from liver failure after like, a few years.

15. Fjord officially “meeting the parents” and Gentleman/Marion giving Fjord the shovel talk because that didn’t happen last time.

Aw he didn’t go with! But the gentleman did talk about Fjord anyways lol and gave her some sound advice.

16. Wedding mentions/discussions? Proposals? Anyone? No?

Well Jester proposed to marry... her parents? Lol did not see that one coming. Veth and Yeza renewing vows yes! It was a nice suggestion.

17. Artagan/sprinkle joins in the celebration because why not (bonus: Sprinkle gets to be free! Or whatever an undead weasel could be lmao)

Artagan and Jester’s conversation was very nice development for them. Sprinkle gets to stay forever, unfortunately for Sprinkle lol.

18. Obligatory wish for Essek’s fancy dunamancy or magical items (like I know we will never see dark star probably but I live for spell casting flavours).

Essek’s hold person on Trent was clutch, “stay down”, what a king. The tether essence, lightning bolt and gravity sinkhole were all wonderful. Still sad about the dark star never being seen though.

19. Obligatory wish for the polymorph spell (look, I just love it okay).

Hey, Jester threatened Astrid with it! Polymorph mention wins! Fjord was sad about the potential choice of turning her into a turtle but it would have been funny.

20. Obligatory wish for Caleb to use more fire/customized/dunamantic spells creatively or with nice flair (what’s sexier than wizards NOTHING).

What’s sexier than counterspells and dispel magic NOTHING. Also hey, the manacles of stasis worked!

21. Discussion about Essek’s future because oh boy can he even go back to the Dynasty? Have they found him out yet? If they did, how mad is the Bright Queen? Are Volstruckers too busy to chase him down? We need to know!

Oh man I mean Essek found a way to live freely at least! With a lot of illusions and identities, of course. He also got to stay in contact with the M9! I think he may show up in campaign 3!

22. Group hug! Group feast! Group cheer! I dunno, just do group stuff. They are the Mighty Nein, they are the Mighty Nine, they saved the world!

A lot of group hugs and feasts! I especially loved the hug when they said goodbye to Essek.

23. Visiting/checking in with other NPCs or allies potentially! Like Kiri, Calianna, Twiggy, Keg, Shakasta, Bryce, Dagen oh also the Hag (I’m kidding).

They checked in with Orly! Not these allies but you know, Orly is awesome.

24. Obligatory wish for everyone (the Nein, their friends/families) to get a happy ending that gives me a feeling of satisfaction and fulfillment, and that the episode/campaign ends with a poetically beautiful scene!

Yes, it was a very poetic and very beautiful story indeed

I love the Mighty Nein/Nine, I love the cast. I’m so grateful for their story in my life. Words are not enough to describe my thankfulness for being able to go on this journey with them.

Now excuse me I just need to go sob in a corner.

My score: 19/24

Seriously though check out #13 I’m proud of that one

Other Highlights:

Caleb hit 100 HP OMG I too am proud of him.

Well I didn’t expect the boss fight but I’m glad we are getting one?

Caleb’s produce flame was used by Veth on Fluffernutter, nice!

The Veth + Beau putting collar combo was the coolest thing I’ve ever seen, also there is something poetic about Caleb relying entirely on his friends and Astrid to carry out the collar tactic on Trent.

The forced empathy commands by Cad lmao wow angry Cad is scary, too bad Trent didn’t have any.

Veth’s silent image... Caleb disintegrating and burning everything in the T-dock... Caleb’s book for his parents... Professor Widogast... Excuse me I’m going to cry now.

#cr spoilers #c2e141 #critical role #critical role spoilers #cr liveblog #manifest list #the mighty nein

22 notes · View notes

thomotomo · 4 years ago

Text

Fuck it.

Summary: Loki and Tony have been dating for a while in secret, one day where the ex-Rogues are getting too much on Tony’s nerves and he decides to say fuck it to their little secret.

Pairing: IronFrost Tony Stark x Loki

Words: 2.0k

A/N: 1st fic of 2021! Tell me what you think about it :)

Tony frowned as he felt the sun’s rays hit his face. He simply didn’t want to wake up and face the cold outside of his bed and the people outside his bedroom.

He nuzzled closer from the “not that hot” body that was lying next to him. He felt the body’s chest rise up and down quickly as the same time as hearing a low laugh. Tony groaned and half-heartedly hit the torso of the other male.

“Stop laughing at me Loki. You’re just a comfy pillow.”, Tony stated, voice rough because of the previous night.

“Oh, considering what happened yesterday night, I’m more than just a pillow to you huh?”, the Asgardian asked a smirk playing on his lips even though the other couldn’t see him.

“Meh, just an upgraded pillow.”, Tony grinned as he moved to take a look at his lover. He looked at his pale features and bright green eyes and kissed the dark-haired male softly.

“I wish we wouldn’t have to leave that room…”

“Me too darling… Sadly we have to go or those companions of yours will wonder why Tony Stark didn’t left his bedroom and they will find a stupid reason about it as if you’re going to murder someone…”, Loki said, a small frown on his face.

“I know, they act like assholes, but we have no other choices but have them here.”

Tony sighed and laid back his head on Loki’s torso, closing his eyes to savour the moment they were having before they inevitably had to separate themselves from each other for the day. After cuddling for extra minutes Loki regretfully pulled away and put on his clothes.

“Sorry love, I have to go back to my room…”

“It’s okay Loki-doki, see you later then.”, the nickname made Loki groan playfully as he pulled the last piece of cloth on him and left to go to his bedroom.

Tony stared at the now closed door and felt his heart ache from the emptiness he felt, even though Loki just left. He wishes they could spend every second with each other but alas they couldn’t. Mainly because they were housing the ex-Rogues with whom he wasn’t on good terms at the moments. After all, he received a nearly fatal wound from someone he admired greatly, of course their relations would be very strained.

Tony sighed and stood up, looking for his clothes and put them on before checking if he had any hickeys or not and when satisfied with the covering of his . He gathered all his mental strength and stepped out his room, locking it behind him and left to go to the kitchen, trying to dismiss the feeling of dread in his stomach as he neared the room and arbored a look of tiredness and confidence as he stepped inside.

Some ex-Rogues were eating but luckily for him Rogers was probably jogging or something else and Tony was glad for that. Even though he wasn’t the most aggressive of the band, Tony felt constantly judged by the man and the ghost of his father every time the blonde male was trying to talk about what happened.

Tony took a mug as he nodded politely to the Rogues present and made himself a cup of coffee and waited a bit impatiently and slightly anxious. He heard the haughty scoff which obviously came from Wanda and tried not to wince at the thought of her being able to use freely her powers against him if she ever wanted.

“Of course, the great Tony Stark wouldn’t talk to us. He’s better than that after all.”

Tony closed his eyes as the last drops of coffee fell in into his mug and grabbed it, trying to put a pleasant a face and turned to face her and the others.

“Well good morning then Wanda, good morning to you too Clint and Natasha.”

Tony walked away to his lab, a fake air of confidence to avoid any questions and once he was in one of his favourite places in the tower he dropped the act and sighed tiredly. Having the ex-Rogues clearly had taken a toll on his mental health but sadly he had no choices to accept them, mainly because he felt guilty leaving his ex-comrades even though they were the one who messed with him in first place but also partly because the government didn’t like to see their star super-hero being a fugitive so of course they wanted him to become once again a great team.

Tony sipped on his coffee and started to work on his current project, giving instructions to Friday and gently lectured DUM-E whenever he brought the wrong object to help him. Bruce came later in the room, starting his own work quietly, sometimes disrupting their quiet work by asking some help for something. Tony really enjoyed working in this calm but sadly every good things have to ends and it happened when Steve decided to step inside the lab.

“Stark, we need to talk.”

Tony kept working on his project.

“We can do it here. What do you want Rogers?”

“I’d like to know if we’re obligated to have Loki around. Wanda and Clint feel really uncomfortable whenever he’s around, and truth to be told I am too.”

“Oh and you don’t think I’m uncomfortable around Wanda?”, Tony scoffed but stopped working to avoid any accidents.

“C’mon Tony that’s ridiculous, she’s a child who made mistakes! Loki is a grown ass adult who tried to invade the Earth and murder everyone! Why is he here anyway?”, Tony could feel Steve trying to keep his “golden hero” façade by trying to keep himself from yelling at Tony. The dark-haired man turned to face the other hero.

“Well if you had read the news asshole, you would have known that Loki had been mind controlled, which means he attacked Earth against his will. He could have invaded Earth from anywhere but no, right in New York where a lot of heroes are stationed. A bit weird for someone who want to submit the planet huh? Seriously Rogers, Wanda is not a kid either she’s in her 20’s!”

“Tha-That’s not the same! She was tricked into thinking they were friendly!”

“Well the situations are quite the same in my opinion! Anyway, I don’t even know why I bother talking about this to you? If you have a problem with anyone in the team, I’m not the boss here you should see Ross and the council they’ll decide of solutions and all.”

“Tony you can’t dismiss this like that!”, Steve took a step toward Tony, making the man

“I-“ “Rogers, not only he can, but he just did. Why don’t you go see Ross like Anthony advised you?”

Loki stepped in, seemingly out of thin air (which wouldn’t be surprising considering the man’s powers). Steve stared at the Asgardian, turning a bit red and stomped awa.

Tony sighed as Loki approached him.

“Are you alright love?”

“Yes thank you Loki.”

Tony felt soft lips touching their forehead and he happily sighed. Bruce was still in the room but ignored the two lovers. They didn’t mind being affective in front of people who actually cared about them, they knew they wouldn’t be judged, and it was better to keep their relationship between people who really mattered to them to avoid any complications.

They stayed close to each other for a few moments before Tony told him he had to work on his project. Loki offered to help or at least stay in the lab in case Steve would come back to bother him, but Tony rejected the offer.

Loki kissed him in the cheek and left to train with Stephen. Tony kept a soft smile the whole time, that was the effect the ex-villain had on him. He heard Bruce laughing and he turned his head to hide he was laughing about Tony.

“Shut up Bruce there’s nothing funny!”

The other man tried to calm himself as Tony looked at him dead serious, trying not to break character because holy molly it was great to see Bruce laughing freely and in genuine happiness. Once Bruce calmed down they resumed their work but not for long before they got interrupted again, this time by Clint.

“Stark. Why is Loki roaming free around me?”, Tony couldn’t help but sigh, the Rogues weren’t able to discuss between each other to coordinate their complains.

“Barton. I can’t resolve this issue, I’m not the boss here and earlier Rogers came to talk to me about this issue. He went to see Ross so if you would please go and join them instead of bothering me during work.”

Tony heard Clint stomp away and sighed before continuing his work. He didn’t see the time pass and before he knew it, it was time for dinner and Bruce reminded him, forcing him to leave his work alone. It was something that happened during the time the Rogues weren’t here yet, he had taken upon himself to eat at reasonable hours and was “forced” by Loki to sleep a bit more than before and truth to be told, he felt a bit better.

When they arrived in the kitchen, everyone was already here and the only place available was next to Steve, but luckily to his left there was Loki and Tony sent a secret smile to his lover, which got reciprocated by a smile smirk and a heated gaze making Tony feel hot on the inside. But he didn’t ignore the glares Loki was getting from most of the ex-Rogues, mainly Clint and Steve who’s meeting with Ross didn’t seems to go the way they had hoped.

On the inside Tony felt really glad Ross and the council had denied whatever request they had made about Loki, even if he knew that it wouldn’t have been accepted, considering that the Rogues were on a kind of probation with everything they did prior to be re-integrated to the Avengers they wouldn’t be believed unless they brought substantial proofs.

Everyone dived in the meal, trying to keep it civil between but of course it didn’t last before Loki couldn’t help but make a sarcastic jab toward Steve’s behaviour with Tony, making everyone start an argument.

Tony sighed tiredly, he knew they shouldn’t have accepted trying to have a meal with everyone pre and post Russian bunker incident reunited in the same place for a meal. He just wanted to everyone to shut up and eat their meal but he knew it wouldn’t be so easy. He ignored the injunctions that were thrown at him by Wanda and Clint and instead observed Loki’s face who was sporting a smirk on his face as he was arguing with the Rogues, clearly insulting their abilities and, in that moment, Tony found him extremely hot.

Tony decided if everyone was already hot angry why not throw some grease on the fire. This would be fun. He suddenly stands up, catching Loki’s shirt collar in his hand and kissed his lover, cutting short the Asgardian insult toward Wanda’s magic and well shutting up everyone because they were now gaping at him.

Tony stopped kissing and winked at Loki who seemed shocked for a split second but quickly put on a grin and licked his lips.

“C’mon Loki-doki, let’s eat in the lab it’ll be quieter.”

Steve was spluttering, shocked, and most of the Rogues were trying to find something to say about the display of affection that just took place in front of them.

“Also, yes, I’m dating Loki and we’re damn happy. And you clearly don’t have a say in this. Go complain to Ross, again, and everyone who you think they care and see how they will react.”

Tony snatched his plate and left the room, quickly followed by Loki who had a shit-eating grin on his face. Once they were in the lab Loki talked.

“Well love, that some spectacle you put out there.”

“At least those little assholes will actually have something to complain about.”

Loki laughed, from now on the Rogues will definitely will have to worry not only about the PDA but also on which surface they want to eat their food on.

#ironfrost #tony x loki #avengers #tony stark x loki #marvel

14 notes · View notes

sherlollyandspoilers · 4 years ago

Text

Questions about Sherlolly

I stole these questions from this post because they looked like fun :D

1. Coffee shop AU: Who is the barista, and who frequents the coffee shop?

Molly is the bubbly barista and Sherlock frequents that coffee shop. At first he goes as part of his routine (probably two or three days a week) but then when he notices Molly he starts coming every day.

2. Highschool/College AU: Who is the straight-A student, and who’s the backrow slacker?

Molly is the straight-A student who loves learning new things and is always curious. Sherlock is the backrow slacker who sleeps through most of the lectures (if he comes) but still passes the class anyways.

3. Rivals to loves AU: Who takes their rivalry seriously, and who is half in it just to push the other’s buttons?

Sherlock takes the rivalry seriously at first because he is annoyed that anyone dares to think they could meet his level. Molly thinks his annoyed face is cute.

4. Enemies to lovers AU: Which one switches sides?

Sherlock. Once he gives in to his feelings for Molly, he is all hers!

5. Soulmate AU: Who is eager to meet their soulmate? Who absolutely does not want to meet their soulmate?

If I had to pick who was eager, it would be Molly. But I am also really intrigued by the idea that neither of them like the idea of a soulmate, Sherlock for obvious reasons, but Molly because she likes the idea of choosing to fall in love with someone.

6. Single parent AU: Which one is the single parent? (Alt. if they’re both single parents: Which one is open to starting a new relationship from the start? Which one is never planning on finding love again…Until they meet the other and are instantly smitten?)

Molly is the single parent. If they are both single parents, I think Sherlock would be more into the idea of started a new relationship from the start than Molly – I think she would be very hesitant because them getting involved would mean eventually their kids would have to meet and in her mind it would complicate things a lot.

7. Doctor AU: Which one is the longsuffering doctor? Which one is the patient?

Well, Molly is a Doctor, but I would like to see Sherlock as a Doctor as well and he is treating her and she is constantly questioning his judgement and choices because she thinks she knows better and then one day while they are arguing back and forth about her treatment Sherlock finally just yells, “Well if you think you know better than me, why are you still my patient?!” and her response is, “Of course I’m still your patient – you’re the one other person that I trust my life to!”

8. Bodyguard AU: Who is the bodyguard? Who are they protecting? Which one is secretly pining for the other?

I could totally see this going both ways – Sherlock being the brooding and silent bodyguard protecting Molly who is all bubbly and overshares everything with him because she has been sheltered from a lot of social situations throughout her life. OR Molly is the bodyguard and Sherlock thinks it is ridiculous because how is this tiny woman going to protect me? but then of course they get into some trouble and she turns out to be this major BADASS! And in every situation it is mutual, silent pining.

9. Pirate AU: Who is the pirate? Who is the member of the royal family who did not sign up for this?

I like the idea of Pirate Sherlock and Princess Molly, but there is something definitely appealing about Pirate Molly and Prince Sherlock who is totally fed up with everything!

10. Childhood best friends AU: Which one was super obviously in love with the other the whole time? Who was oblivious until they were older?

Sherlock has loved Molly forever and she was oblivious of her feelings for her, but she also loved him too.

OKAY, this was really fun to answer (I’m probably going to do this with Everlark too)! It’s not really a tagging thing, but I would love to see what other people think about their OPT? @geekymoviemom @broadwaylover17 @staarliings @b-boop5 @mychakk @mega-aulover and anyone else who wants to do it!!

#sherlolly

11 notes · View notes

potatoesandsunshine · 4 years ago

Text

truly incoherent late-night ramblings about the mighty nein and pride under the cut. an unorganized stream of consciousness basically. i’m so tired i have so many Thoughts

cad saying tonight that nobody in the m9 is vain (can’t remember if he said “none of us are vain” or “none of you are vain” but i’m going with the first one bc i can’t watch it again till it goes up on yt) really got me thinking because my immediate reaction was “no? that’s not true?” but i couldn’t figure out why exactly i thought that - so naturally i spent the rest of the episode pondering it.

like... the members of the mighty nein are each in their own way juggling a massive load of insecurity and in some cases just pure self-loathing but they’re still very... they’re not vain, but they are proud to the point of arrogance which is just super interesting from a character perspective (just wanna note here this is not a “and this makes x character A Bad Person” hot take or whatever, characters have character flaws and that’s what makes them interesting to me, please don’t come to my inbox saying i hate fjord or caleb or caduceus or veth or jester or beau or yasha because that’s just not the case) anyway imo yasha is currently the only one who hasn’t shown a big moment of this flaw, everybody else has. yes it’s possible i don’t remember a moment for yasha at this second but tbh she’s spent so much time getting controlled by other forces this campaign like :( give yasha a break challenge :( she gets one from this post

early on beau had her kind of rebel without a cause, too cool for school thing going on - to me that’s a kind of pride? like it came from a feeling of isolation and disconnect from the people around her and the structures her life had operated in and also the idea that “i’m the only one who sees how bullshit everything is” that’s (at least in my own experience) a really common feeling in late teens/early twenties. honestly the first moment that shook her out of it was dairon imo (i know that a lot of beau’s change is attributed to molly’s death but i honestly think it started back with that brawl in the warehouse) and dairon has continued to be a (flawed themselves) check against arrogance for beau which is really interesting to me? anyway continuing

fjord’s whole persona that kinda wasn’t a persona during the pirates arc (i’m talking specifically about the captain pursuing his own ends, not about the accent thing) was very much a character based on knowing more about the world than everybody else did, even though i don’t think fjord himself believed it? honestly for all that you can say about fjord i think he’s lowest on the list in terms of pride (besides yasha!! who isn’t on this list!!) bc he’s very honest about the fact that he often feels like he just does not know what’s going on around him. props to that bc it is hard to do.

veth’s biggest Moment of this (and pride just doesn’t feel like the right word but i don’t know how else to capture the meaning, the idea of Knowing Better than everyone else i guess? you know what i mean) that i can think of is the letter to astrid in zadash that everyone screamed about bc caleb was the current fandom favorite sadboi at the time; it was such a big moment of trying to arrange someone else’s life for them that’s like. like it’s a Big Moment idk how to explain it. i think a lot of the responsibility she feels for yezza and luc also relies on the premise that she Knows Best which again is super interesting because it clearly causes her a lot of guilt that she’s not doing Enough for them in her own eyes when it’s like... like... talk to each other... idk idk i have Feelings about the brenattos. Arranging the lives of other people, no matter your intentions, is imo a thing that comes from thinking you Know Better than they do.

caleb... i so do not want to re-litigate the disintegrate discourse that was imo truly a waste of time last week but i do agree with the idea that caleb’s got ye olde mythological-level hubris. the man has a goal of turning back time to rewrite his own mistakes and like it’s not just a dream it’s a Goal He’s Working Towards which means that either 1) he believes it’s possible for him to do it or 2) he can’t admit that it isn’t possible and he has to live with ‘his’ mistakes (i can’t get into the caleb stuff rn but uhhh it’s not as much a personal failing as you believe it is caleb). both of these viewpoints are like. so dependent on viewing himself as A Power That Affects The Universe instead of someone who is affected by it which is kind of the sentiment i’m trying to get at idk idk it’s late i’m tired

it’s interesting with jester and caduceus for a couple reasons but the fact that they’re both literally blessed by gods is like... like i can’t say they’re unduly proud (i don’t really think that any of the m9 are like unduly proud) because they’re literally made More Important by the deities of the setting from the moment of introduction but we do still see really interesting stuff from both of them imo

caduceus thinks he knows better than everybody else which is something i think we’ve seen from the beginning as well? that’s part of why he’s kind of set himself up as the Wise Councilor of the group (and if you ask me, why he seems unable to reach out for support of his own - all the instances of someone digging deeper into him were instigated by other people from what i can remember right now) and it’s been neat to see him reconciling things he Knows Are Right from his time in the cemetery with a more complicated reality in the wider world. it’s hard for me to say that cad’s arrogant because he thinks he’s privy to the literal divine plan when he is privy to an actual divine plan thanks to the wildmother but i think it’s interesting to see it in the small moments. we saw it more earlier i think? but like this part of his character isn’t Gone. as long as he’s got himself designated as the group moral compass i think there’s an element of this in play.

and jester ohh jester i love u i’m so sorry everything has been so hard for so long like aaaa imagine you find out your best friend (who is also your god) has been lying to you for all of your friendship and also lying to all of his followers (because it turns out he’s not a god, technically) that’s so hard anyway. anway. i don’t wanna derail into talking about how much i love jester but i love her ok? ok. anyway jester’s current defense mechanism is retreating into the fact that she’s the best follower of the traveler and he loves her the most, because she’s Special (which again, her god told her this there’s literally nothing i can say against it) but we’re seeing that kind of fracture in an interesting way if you ask me? because the fact of the matter is, whenever jester asks a question about ‘the followers of the traveler’ she is implicitly also asking a question about herself (this is why i was so fascinated by her convo with fjord tonight also). it only works for So Long to keep repeating that you’re special when you’re not sure about it anymore oh jester i am so worried about u ohhh :( i am so sleepy but i have so many thoughts

#cr spoilers #critical role #i mean the character flaw pride just to be clear

10 notes · View notes

flowercoasts · 5 years ago

Text

no grave can hold my body down (1/1)

words: 1.3k

summary:

“Beau?” “Yeah, Jester?” “What… What do you think is on the other side?”

Beau goes down in battle and Jester rages.

notes: so i started this ficlet a year ago and completely forgot to finish it rip. ANYWAYS IMAGINE IF JESTER TOOK A LEVEL IN BARBARIAN

READ ON AO3 or

“Beau?”

“Yeah, Jester?”

“What… What do you think is on the other side?”

“Beau!” Jester watches with wide eyes and shaky hands as Beau takes a hit from the sword clutched in the hand of the giant. It cuts down her front until all Jester can see is the bloody red ribbons cutting through the air and then -

Beau stares ahead blankly and smiles at Jester. The giant swings again, and Beau isn’t smiling anymore. Her body flies back from the force of the blow, and she slams against the stone cavern wall and crumples to the ground, unmoving.

Jester’s hand instantly comes up to cover her mouth, tears filling her eyes as she stares at the blood pooling on the floor.

She hears shuffling, and tears her eyes away just long enough to see the giant swinging it’s sword in her direction.

“I don’t know Jester… I never really thought about it.”

“Really?”

“I mean, yeah, we’ve come close a few times but I don’t like to think about it, I guess? If we’re there, we’re there.”

Jester ducks at the last second, the giant’s sharpened blade connecting with the stalagmite behind her - where her head was just a moment before.

Her eyes flash with anger, filling completely black, and she yells in infernal at the giant towering over her, fangs extended and hand raised. Jester’s tail wildly thrashes, and her chest swells with a deep anger. The air around Jester and the giant goes cold as the moisture in the air freezes to form ice shards that pierce into the giant, who stumbles back a foot in surprise.

The giant roars angrily at Jester.

Jester roars back, fangs sharp in the dim firelight.

“... Where do you think Molly went?”

“Somewhere nice, probably surrounded by naked people and drugs.”

“Beau.”

Jester advances, hands outstretched and magic flowing up and down her arms. She radiates faintly with green energy as she pulls her fingers into a complicated pattern, releasing a bright burning blue streak of energy that slams into the giant with the force of a tidal wave.

It stumbles and topples over, crashing down onto the stone floor with an earthquake-like rumble. The stones crack from his weight and Jester snarls, feeling unhinged and letting her rage consume her for the first time in her life.

She readies herself for another blast.

“He’s somewhere… Molly’s somewhere. I dunno, maybe there is a place up there or whatever. If there is, he would be there.”

“I think he is. He’s totally hanging out with the Traveler right now.”

“I think he would like that.”

The giant groans, reaching around blindly for the broadsword that clattered out of it’s hand when it fell.

Nothing exists outside of this moment to Jester. Her vision focuses entirely on the giant, the image of Beau falling to the floor playing in a loop in her mind, forever ingrained in her mind. The burning anger fuels her. It feeds the wave of red hot burn that threatens to drown her. In that moment, Jester wants that giant to pay.

She grins, teeth sharp and full of malice. For once, the giant actually seems afraid. Jester aims her magical blast at his head.

“Jester?”

“Yeah, Beau?”

“I was lying, earlier.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“I’m - wait, what? You knew? Am I that transparent?”

“No, I’m just super good at reading you Beau. Best friends, remember?”

“Uh, yeah.”

The magic courses through her, thrumming in her veins. This one is different than her usual bursts of magic, not that Jester’s paying attention to that detail at the moment. Still, her magic flares blood red for a moment before settling back into its usual deep green, though still devoid of its usual sparkles.

Jester screams as she blasts clean through the giant’s head, letting out all of her rage, her anger, still coiled deep below her gut.

The giant’s outstretched hand falls to the floor with a heavy thud, limp and unmoving. Stepping forward with her axe, Jester snarls at the corpse, still wound tight with all the emotions drumming through her head like a warzone.

“What did you want to tell me?”

“I think it’s just dark. On the other side. I’m not sure there is anything. I mean, I hope there is. I really fucking hope there is.”

“... I hope we don’t have to find out, Beau.”

“We won’t.”

A hand claps down suddenly on her shoulder. Jester whirls around, axe at the ready and fangs glinting sharp and dangerous.

Fjord stumbles back to avoid the swipe of her axe, his eyes wide with alarm and a little bit of fear. Dimly, Jester registers her own fully black eyes reflected in the yellow of Fjord’s irises, but the blood rushing through her ears makes it hard to focus on anything but the rage.

He looks hurt and a little scared. Jester can’t quite tell if he’s scared of her or for -

Beau.

Jester follows Fjord’s pointed look towards Beau’s still unmoving body where Nott, Caleb, and Yasha crowd around Caduceus, who has his hands full of diamonds and placed on Beau’s chest.

The axe falls out of her hand, and Jester stumbles towards Beau - that red angry something still screams in her head but it’s overridden by the fear that crawls up her throat.

“Beau?”

“Yeah?”

“Um. Nevermind. Goodnight Beau.”

“Night, Jes.”

Beau’s body is still limp and unnaturally pale by the time Jester makes it over to her. Heartbeat pounding in her ears, Jester falls to her knees and gathers Beau’s body in her arms, desperately trying to ignore the blood that stains her hands and clothes.

Around Caduceus’ hands, still upturned on Beau’s chest, green magic swirls through the handful of diamonds in his palm. Jester watches through tears as the diamonds slowly dissipate into green powder, and the soft breeze that flows through the cavern ruffles Jester’s bangs and the loose hairs from Beau’s bun.

Jester presses her forehead to Beau’s and prays.

“... Hey, Beau?”

“Mmhm? ”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

The world slows and dissolves into the slow spread of the seconds that Jester waits for Beau’s eyes to open. Her blood pumps more intensely, arms clutching tightly onto Beau’s lean frame as if to will the life back into her. Jester feels too taut and spread thin, her own insides turned upside down while tears continue to stream down her cheeks.

Behind her, Jester can feel the weighted presence of everyone else, their own worry bleeding into hers, amplifying everything to a sensitive point.

It feels like a million years when Beau finally stirs, groaning awake as her familiar blue eyes flutter open tiredly. Jester realizes at that moment that she was holding her breath, and sucks in a gulp of air desperately.

Beau grunts when Jester pulls the monk tight to her chest, tears dampening the already wet blue fabric of her expositor robes. The sobs get caught halfway through her throat as Jester’s anger simmers down to immeasurable relief, immense love.

“Hey, Jes,” Beau rasps, bringing her arms up tight around Jester’s shoulders.

In a collective wave, the rest of the Nein pile in on the hug, arms over arms and a shared warmth sealing them tight together. Beau groans, but a smile blooms on her face.

Jester leans back, tears drying on her cheeks, to find Beau’s blue eyes staring directly at her.

Something crashes over Jester then, something similar to the way she felt when Beau fell. It’s just as big and unfathomable, but this time, there’s no lingering anger. There’s no blood rushing in her ears and her vision tunneling down to a single point.

There’s only Beau.

Jester presses her forehead to Beau’s and they share a warm smile.

#beaujester #critical role #ficlet #fanfiction #cr fanfiction #my writing #elena talks #anyways edited in like 5 minutes but I Have Been Thinking About this For A Year.

38 notes · View notes

bregee13 · 5 years ago

Photo

I've been thinking about this a while now. And I'm still not too sure where to go with it (as in how I would want the end result of this to be). (I also don't know what the name of this ghost is...) (Also also I got this idea from a song lol.)

So what if that super powered substance were to come into contact with the dead? Specifically, the remains of this fine lady. Since she passed so long ago she doesn't have anything but maybe bones. But maybe her spirit comes into contact with it too (due to being a bit stuck in that spot), and becomes a much more powerful spirit because of the substance. She'd also gain super powers relating to her death (As well as ghost related powers). She would have powers of ice and cold. (Kinda like the opposite of Jay in a way) She is also constantly freezing and wet (She was horribly attacked and drowned. Afterwards her body was hidden away were it was never found.)

But how would that happen? Well, maybe RapoMan and Captain Ablaze bust some bad guys hiding out in an old building. And during a scuffle with the bad guys (or maybe the two just bumped into each other due to a lack of communication? I can also see that happening for a dumb reason like that. Though neither of them would admit that lol.) the substance fell between the floorboards. And that was enough of a distraction for the bad guys to run off. And because they had to chase after them, they couldn't focus on the accidental spill right away (allowing the substance to contact her).

Of course, the two would have to return to the building to make sure that spill didn't do anything (As their super forms? Or their secret identities? Not sure). And lucky for them, nothing seems to be wrong! Except now that the building is a little more on the empty side, it has a bit of a haunted feel to it. Captain Ablaze/Jay is freaked out, but RapoMan/Kem keeps calm and tries reassuring Jay/Ablaze that there is no such thing as the paranormal. And yet, Jay/Ablaze is still on edge. He knows Kem/RapoMan has a point, but he just feels like someone is watching him. Actually, whoever it is isn't just watching. He could also swear that someone was touching him, and calling someone's name. He couldn't make out the name, and it wasn't his name, but it still felt like someone was calling out to him specifically.

Seeing that there wasn't a reason to be there, the two left the building and went home. But on the way home, Jay couldn't help but feel like whatever was at that building was following him. And by the time he got there, that feeling didn't go away. In fact, it felt like it was already there. Jay was so freaked out and tried to make himself calm down, but he couldn't stop having a mini panic attack. He did eventually calm down slightly, though it didn't last very long. Because once he finally calmed down, he saw her. A ghostly woman approached him, calling him a name he didn't understand. Jay soon learned that this woman thought that he was her previous lover in a past life. She said he looked just like him. She could just FEEL that they were soulmates destined to find each other over and over again. Jay was just scared and confused. What is the deal with this woman? Why did she follow him of all people? ...And why is she constantly hitting on him? (He gets used to it eventually).

The next day, Jay is no longer as afraid as before. But he is still super anxious. Besides, he doesn't know much if anything about this lady! So he gets ready to leave the house and hang out with Kem and Molly (who, at this point, are both good friends of Jay. Molly knows about their super identities at this point too. Jay has finally started getting over his feelings for the two, though it is still a bit rough for him), kind of hoping they would have an answer. And the whole time the ghost woman keeps on following him. This is super unsettling to Jay since it's a little obsessive, and he really doesn't want to talk about her in front of her. But he still gets the courage to go outside. (At this point, the ghost turns invisible so nobody can see her. She only wants Jay to see her.)

When he meets up with them, he asks if they believe in ghosts. Kem immediately assumes Jay is just asking because he's still freaked out from the abandoned building he thought was haunted (And honestly? He's not necessarily wrong). Kem then goes on to explain that all 'paranormal activity' can easily be explained away with science. But Molly is curious. While she isn't exactly a believer in the paranormal, she is very open minded about it and asks Jay about what he experienced. (Meanwhile Kem is probably rolling his eyes) Jay, now encouraged to talk, opens up about this ghost woman that followed him home from that building (He didn't mention her flirtatious nature though. Nor why she followed him.) Molly would be like 'really?! :0' and Kem would just highly doubt anything Jay said was true. And of course Jay would want to prove everything he had said, so he mentions that the ghost is right beside him. And of course she is invisible. So now both Molly and Kem are looking at Jay like 'WTR ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT???'. And of course Jay feels like an idiot. Molly claims she believes him, but who would believe something that ridiculous? Even Jay was starting to doubt himself. He didn't even want to talk about the ghost to them ever again. (But he will!)

Eventually, Jay and the ghost woman start to actually date each other. And things actually get serious. So much so, that Jay couldn't just keep it a secret from his friends and feel comfortable with it. So he tried to mention his new relationship to them a few times. At first they played along with Jay's 'fantasy', but eventually they grew incredibly concerned for him. (He's just getting over his feelings for them, and now he has an imaginary ghost girlfriend? It sounds kinda sad. Besides, since this ghost showed up, Jay had been a lot more distant than before.) So the two try to confront Jay and make sure he's doing okay. Jay is of course upset that they don't believe in him, and tries to convince them he's not making stuff up. But he fails horribly (The ghost just refuses to go visible in front of them). Sad and offended, Jay runs off to go home and sulk.

Back at home, Jay expresses his frustration to his ghost girlfriend (both about him not being taken seriously AND about her not helping the situation). She tries to make it up to him, and it works for a short while. But then Jay accidentally reveals his previous feelings toward his friends (He had been asked about this before, but he told her he didn't have that kind of relationship with them). And the ghost girl, obsessed with him, gets incredibly offended by this. Seeing him as a cheat, she lashes out at Jay.

Lucky for Jay, Molly and Kem were right outside his house (Mostly to apologize and make sure he's okay. Kem is a tad reluctant since he thinks Jay needs some alone time first, but Molly wanted to do it asap. So she kinda dragged Kem there lol). When they realized Jay was in trouble, they busted through the door to try to help. (And yes, at this point the ghost was visible to Kem and Molly. She wanted them to see her and how they hurt her.) And as much as they tried to help Jay, they couldn't do much. (Please imagine Jay saying 'we could really use RapoMan right now!' And Kem responding with 'and what is he going to do? Punch it to death?')

But Molly gets the idea of just telling the ghost to leave. Kem and Jay agree that that is a very dumb idea that would never work. But Molly tries anyway (It didn't work). Molly could have sworn that demanding a poltergeist to leave you alone should work. (Kem: 'Where did you hear something like that from?' Molly: 'I read it from somewhere! I figured it wouldn't hurt...')

Eventually Molly realized that it would only work if JAY told the ghost to leave (It is in HIS home, bugging HIM). Jay initially refuses. (Jay: 'It didn't work for her, why would it work if I do it?') But Molly is insistent that he tries. Even Kem thought it was a decent idea (Hey, if ghosts are real, anything is possible now). But Jay keeps refusing, admitting that he didn't want her to leave (Jay: 'I don't want her to leave...' Molly: 'What? Why not?!' J: 'I don't want her to go!! I don't want to be alone again!') And of course the ghost is like: 'Oh really?! You'll be alone? Alone with those two, more like! You want them, don't you?! You pig!' (And Kem and Molly are thinking like: 'HOLY RAPO this is awkward' and Jay is just thinking: '...shiitake mushrooms!')

Jay tried explaining that wasn't true, but it didn't work (He clearly still had some complicated feelings for them, and his powers were activating as a result. Oops.) Molly and Kem stood up for him though, saying that they most definitely weren't a thing. (Ghost: 'You two lie! Horrible, all of you!' Kem: 'I'll have you know that a liar is the last thing I am, and that he is the last thing I'd want.' Molly: 'He tells the truth! And I have no interest in him whatsoever either!' Meanwhile Jay is both happy and slightly offended.) But as much as the ghost is surprised they aren't (and likely never will be) a thing, that didn't make her less upset at Jay. ('if he really loved me, he wouldn't think about anyone else!') The ghost continued to threaten and yell at him. Jay was once again encouraged to tell her to go away, but he still didn't want to. Not only was he lonely, he also wanted to get to know her more.

Though from the pressure of everything going on, Jay felt like he had to do something. He couldn't just tell her to leave forever, since he wouldn't mean it. But he could try something else. And so he told her to simply knock it off. To stop acting forceful and immature. To stop being cruel to him and his friends. To stop obsessively following him. To stop calling him by that name that wasn't his. To mind her own business. To stay somewhere else that wasn't his home. Or his friends' homes. And that if she couldn't do those things, she should go away and never see or hear him ever again (This was the hardest part for Jay, but he meant it). And after that, the ghost stopped. She quietly apologized and left. Though not before saying she'll be staying where he first found her.

After this, the three would probably talk a little bit about what happened. I think their friendship would get stronger because of it!

And as much as I don't know what I want to do with the ghost girl, I know she'll be back! (Besides, there's a plot twist about her death I've been thinking about!)

#my art #my ocs #rapoman #Jay Ablaze #Molly Crossfade #drawn to life OCS #oc rambling #Drawn to Life

8 notes · View notes

simplyshelbs16xoxo · 5 years ago

Text

‘The Adventure of Philip Anderson’ Chapter 2: Busted

Sneaky texts, angst, a dash of romance, and...more eavesdropping??

I'm not sure if I feel super satisfied with how this chapter turned out, but I hope y'all enjoy anyways!

FFN | Ao3 | Buy Me a Coffee?

They had been avoiding each other. It had already been two weeks since Molly had last spoken to Sherlock, breaking his heart. She had taken every shift she could get to take her mind off the fact she was an emotional train wreck. For the first couple of days after what was now deemed the ‘Sherrinford Incident,’ Sherlock had texted and called her numerous times, but Molly couldn’t bring herself to answer him. As a last resort, he had even tried to visit at her flat, but instead of welcoming him inside, she remained as quiet as possible until he left. He had given up on contacting her after that.

After what felt like hours spent sorting through the stacks of paperwork in her office, Anderson rushed in. “This has gone on long enough.”

Molly’s face twisted in confusion. “What has?”

“This!” Anderson gestured to her. “You avoiding Sherlock. What happened? Why did you lie to him?”

With a heavy sigh, Molly replied, “I don’t really know. It’s rather complicated.”

“Well, then un-complicate it,” he told her. “I know, you’re probably wondering why I even care, but—“

Molly giggled. “This wouldn’t have anything to do with your theory on how Sherlock survived, would it?” Anderson made a face at her. “Look, it’s sweet that you care, really. It all comes down to the fact that what I once thought would never happen is now happening, and it scares the hell out of me.” Molly took a steadying breath. “I just—I’m not ready. I thought I was and I wasn’t.” She couldn’t understand why she was confiding in, of all people, Philip Anderson.

Just then, Stamford poked his head through the doorway. “Molly, could you come take a quick look at something for me?”

She nodded, giving Anderson a sad smile as she left.

“Guess I’ll have to do it the hard way, then,” he muttered under his breath, spotting Molly’s cellphone on her desk. Taking it in his hands, he opened up to the lock screen. A four digit pin was needed to gain access. “It could be her birthday…” he mused. “No, wait…Sherlock’s birthday.” He typed in 0601 which then unlocked the device. It was time to send a message.

“Wasn’t this originally on the mantle?” John asked, prying the knife out of the wall. He studied his friend who had remained in his chair, unmoving. “Sherlock?”

“Hm?” he sounded. Zeroing in on the knife, he realised what John must have asked him. “Oh, it was.”

“Right,” John replied. “And, uh, maybe I should get Mrs. Hudson to dust in here; I know she’d like to.”

“If she’d like,” Sherlock sighed.

This had gone on long enough. Sherlock definitely hadn’t been himself lately. It was common knowledge that Molly harbored feelings for him, so why did he believe such an obvious lie?

“Alright, Sherlock, talk to me.” John pulled up his chair. When Sherlock didn’t answer, he attempted a different approach. “Molly does love you.”

Sherlock gave in. “You don’t think I know that?”

“Then why—“

He ran his hands angrily through his curls. “John, it’s obvious she believes me unworthy of her heart. This is a woman that obviously wishes she didn’t feel anything for me.”

“Don’t do that,” John warned him. “Do not try to disconnect yourself from Molly by referring to her as ‘this woman.’” If Sherlock was going to make any headway, he needed to get out of this state of mind. “For what it’s worth, there is no way in hell that Molly finds you unworthy.”

Sherlock scoffed. “Yes, well, she—“ His mobile rang and he picked it up see who was bothering him now. His eyes lit up. “—She texted.”

John’s eyebrows shot up.

Sherlock, please come by the lab so we can talk. –Molly

Anderson made sure to delete the text after sending it. Hopefully being in the same room wouldn’t kill them. When Molly did return to her office, she asked Anderson if he’d like to help run some tests on the current murder victim in the morgue. He agreed in hopes of seeing what would transpire when Sherlock arrived. They had only been in the lab for fifteen minutes when the detective strolled through the doors, a small paper bag in hand.

“Sherlock,” Molly exclaimed with surprise. Her eyes shifted to the bag he carried. “What’s that?”

“Cinnamon apple scones; your favourite,” he smiled. “I thought you might need some sustenance.”

Molly’s heart was in a state, beating rapidly in her chest. He seemed cheerful despite everything, which only left her wondering why he suddenly decided to see her at work where she really couldn’t run from him. “That’s…very thoughtful of you,” she smiled. “Thank you.”

Sherlock looked at her as if she was his favourite person in the whole world. And truth be told, she was. “You wanted to talk, so here I am. I am here to listen.”

She furrowed her brows in confusion. “I never—“

Anderson coughed…loudly. It almost sounded like he said “talk to him.”

Sherlock turned toward him, a look of annoyance on his face. Anderson took the cue to leave the lab, but he remained just outside the open door.

“You love me,” Sherlock stated simply.

Molly’s eyes widened. “What?” He clearly didn’t believe the lie that escaped her lips two weeks ago.

Taking her hands in his, Sherlock looked into her warm brown eyes. “I know you lied to me, Molly, but what I don’t know is why.”

Molly shook her head. “I don’t understand. If you knew I lied to you, then why did it hurt you if you knew the truth?”

He sighed. “It wasn’t what you lied about, Molly; it was the fact that you lied at all.” Sherlock released her hands. “I know I haven’t been the easiest person to be friends with; I know I’ve hurt you in the past, but the one thing I take pride in is that I have never lied to you.”

Molly felt tears welling up in her eyes. “I’m sorry that I lied. Sherlock, I just—I love you…but I don’t want to.“

Her words, though truthful, cut him like a dull knife. Sherlock felt he knew exactly why. “Because I’m unworthy.”

“What? No! That’s not—“ Molly tried to get a grip on the situation. “I’m scared, Sherlock. I was content loving you from afar because I never expected you to return my affections. Now that I have it within my reach, it scares the hell out of me. I trust you with my life, but I can’t trust you with my heart.”

It all made sense to him. Sherlock had to admit that he had never given her reason to trust him with something as precious as her heart. She knew he would always protect her life…but in what ways could he protect her heart? He knew nothing of romantic entanglements. It was easy to play along with Janine, but this was so much different. This was a love that ran so deep, they could drown in it. The seriousness of the situation dawned on him.

“I understand,” he spoke softly.

Molly perked up just a bit. “You do?”

Sherlock nodded. He took one of her hands in both of his, and pressed his lips softly against the back of it. Molly nearly forgot how to breathe. How could such a simple kiss to the hand wreck her like that? Then there was what he told her as he lifted his head to meet her eyes. “I hope I can gain your trust, Molly. I won’t be giving up so easily.”

Her eyes followed him as he left the room, her jaw dropping ever so slightly.

Anderson was just as shocked as she was. He had successfully cleared the hallway, nearly making a clean getaway until Sherlock’s voice halted him. “Not so fast, Philip.”

Attempting to play it cool, Anderson smiled. “Sherlock. What can I do for you?”

“You texted me from Molly’s phone,” he stated. “Why do you feel the need to interfere in our lives?”

Anderson paled. “Despite our differences in the past, I would actually like to see you happy for once.” He paused to consider his words. “And I’d like to see Molly happy too. Preferably, I’d like to see the both of you happy…together.”

Sherlock looked unamused. “Well, I appreciate your…help. It did get me this far, but for the sake of what’s left of my sanity, stay out of it.” He breezed right past him, but stopped short, turning to face him once more. “And stop pushing Molly into talking to me; I don’t want her to feel obligated to do so. She needs time.” As he stalked off, he added, “I think I do too.”

#sherlolly #the adventure of philip anderson #my fanfiction #sherlock x molly

15 notes · View notes

loquaciousquark · 6 years ago

Text

Talks Machina Highlights - Critical Role C2E42 (November 20, 2018)

Dani was actually goofing around quite a bit here, but this still makes me think of some glorious 90s band, so I’m keeping it.

Anyway! The inimitable @eponymous-rose has done more than her share of recaps lately, so here I am picking up where I’ve been slacking off. Tonight’s guests are Marisha Ray and Laura Bailey (with special guest appearance from Ronin! Awwww), so I can hardly wait. We’re discussing Episode 42: A Hole in the Plan.

Tonight’s announcements: Brian is bursting with an announcement he’s not allowed to reveal for another six months. His favorite guess: something about him stealing all the money from the company and moving to an island, but that’s actually his long game, not the short one.

Throughout November, they’re raising money for Operation Supply Drop, Travis’s favorite charity, which supports both active and retired military.

No episode of Critical Role this week due to Thanksgiving. There will also be no episode of Talks Machina next Tuesday; instead, they’ll be airing Sam’s Fireside Chat! This was a reward from the Critter donations to the Pablove Foundation.

Critical Role hoodies are back in the store; the print is very similar to the original with a bit more embellishment on the text on the back.

“Honey Heist 3: Tova’s Honies” airs this Friday at 7pm Pacific! Marisha: “It was bear-nanas.” Laura: “Oh, no.”

CR Stats: Jester has cast Blessing of the Trickster 31 times; 15 of those times were on Nott. Jester technically won her bar brawl with Sorris! She dealt 16 points of damage to his 15. Beau continues to have the most natural 20s with 49. She also has the most natural 1s, womp womp. Marisha: “Well, I roll a lot, you know?” Brian: “Well, your husband is also a tyrant and not to be messed with.” Marisha says she thinks Gil’s die is cursed and everyone gasps. How dare.

Does Brian feel the pressure of following Dani, who was such an excellent host last week? No; when he went through the potential list of fill-ins, the only one that made sense was Dani.

Marisha sees Darktow as a super-abusive socialist society, which does not sit well with Beau. It’s a silk trap.

Jester’s conversation with Caleb was triggered by Fjord’s kiss, especially with her wondering if it really meant anything to either of them. Laura thinks of her high school crushes and how hard you crushed & how devastated you were at every perceived slight; Jester only has the view of romance through her mother, which means physical affection is very different from emotional affection in her mind. On Brian’s asking, Laura’s high school crush was Han Solo. When Laura’s sister was 12, she paid her $15 to paint Han and Leia in a dip kiss, which she still has framed in her current house. I’m dying, this is adorable.

Beau doesn’t exactly trust that Fjord is going to do the right thing, but him sleeping with Avantika doesn’t trigger her red flags in terms of “looking out for each other, keeping each other in check.” She’s looking more for them bullying someone when they don’t need to, being violent when it’s not necessary. “Pursuing power to endless depths and fucking hot pirates, that’s fine with Beau. She just doesn’t want to kill children.” Brian marvels at how this fits into Jester & Caleb’s conversation about killing people from the most recent episode.

Jester can tell Caleb is tortured, and more than anything she wants people not to be sad around her. She just wants desperately for him to be happy.

Marisha has thought a ton about what Beau would have said if Jester had come to her first about the kiss, especially since it was Jester’s first kiss (Marisha assumes, and Jester answers in an adorably non-committal not-not-a-negative). Beau would have been game for it. She doesn’t know if Beau would have given good advice, but she would have tried her best.

Brian spills that Mary’s character’s CHA in their home game is 6. They discuss Nott’s score of 5 and enjoy themselves mightily at both of their expenses.

GIF of the Week! By @ropadoper, it’s Liam casting Reduce and then the Wall of Fire at the end of the episode, both of which involve Marisha falling out of her chair to the floor in reaction so that only her forehead is visible. Everyone is being so cute this episode I can hardly stand it.

As a reminder, an international shipping facility has been created in the UK. Laura asides to tell Travis the keys are in the diaper bag. Literally everyone is in the studio tonight except Sam, EVEN ASHLEY.

Jester thinks the Traveler always gives very good advice, but his suggestion to trick Fjord was the first time ever she felt a little hesitation to follow his advice. Brian: “Is that because he’s never been wrong or because she’s never been allowed to disagree?” Laura says it’s always been amazing advice so far, much more a best-friend relationship, but this was the first time she didn’t want to take his suggestion wholesale because she wasn’t sure it’s how she wanted to get Fjord to like her. Marisha really likes the dynamic of finding out your childhood best friend is a god.

Beau finds herself still being careful with her walls--Marisha imagines Beau was put in a lot of, like, pageant dresses as a kid--so when Jester commented on her hair and then laughed, she felt a little of that “wait, what, do you actually care? Do I look like shit?” Laura says she laughed, not Jester, because it was the most random thing to compliment Beau on.

Beau’s haircut came into being because it was cool & because Marisha wishes she were brave enough to try an undercut.

Brian’s convinced Fjord’s got gills. Dani: “What do you think Fjord is?” Brian: “Obviously a water man. Water genasi. What are water genasi?”

Beau wasn’t surprised Allison rejected her; she’s used to it. Ack. She was looking for an ally against Avantika, Big Brother style. “Instead she just shat in an alleyway with Nott.”

Laura’s not perturbed the Traveler hasn’t mentioned Fjord’s god; he doesn’t really talk about/care about other gods or patrons. Brian suggests he’s actually the Dongfather in disguise. This show’s collective mental age is smaller than Pike, haha.

Beau felt like such an interloper when Sam asked her to help with Fluffernutter, like the best friend trying to be in on a joke without really knowing what’s going on. Marisha also takes a moment to praise Laura for her Jester over the last few episodes; she’s digging into the metaphorical popcorn every time Jester & Nott start going off. (Me too, bud.) Jester’s description of the insect carrying a piece of bread is one of her favorite D&D moments ever. Both Marisha & Laura are agog at how many little plans they’ve tried have gone disastrous and then circled back around to being mostly okay again.

Beau was a little hurt when she wasn’t asked to help break into the captain’s quarters, since that’s her specialty, but it was eased by being able to help with her knowledge anyway. However, she knew since she didn’t have any magic, she had no escape plan aside from jumping off the boat. She laughs that that’s what they ended up doing anyway.

Jester views sex as a transaction, which is why she’s not particularly bothered by Fjord sleeping with Avantika.

Fanart of the Week: @jdillustrates, with a lovely portrait of Caduceus.

Jester’s warring between the logical part of her brain (he was saving her life) and the romantic part of her brain (did he want to kiss me, though?).

There are reasons Beau learned Deep Speech--not as complicated as most people think--that will be revealed eventually. “Nerdy reasons, not because she was kidnapped and turned into a cultist.”

Fjord/Avantika does make her jealous, but it’s also serving a purpose. Laura compares it to telling the high school crush to go hang out with a best friend, only to have them start dating.

Marisha doesn’t feel like Beau’s plans were overly shot down this episode--it’s something she hadn’t even noticed until this question. Marisha feels like it’s so much of a group effort with everyone trying to get to the right plan that it’s hard to pick out who contributed what part of which plan.

Brief interlude to examine a portrait of Brian that looks like George Michael.

In re: the Molly disguise: Beau felt like there was just a wall of regret walking towards her, because it was the friend she let die and the one-night stand. Beau never felt it was actually Molly, though. Jester picked Molly because when Nott said “Keg,” she instantly associated it with “someone who is really cool--who’s also super cool?” Everyone commiserates over how into the night’s shenanigans Molly would have been.

Beau was frustrated while being detained, but she also knew it was going to happen, so it wasn’t a huge issue. She felt like that was where the challenge began for her--anything to get the guard away from what was going on.

Another brief interlude where everyone experiments with how to make power vaginas with their hands. “This is the car salesman power vagina.” I feel like wherever the rails are for this show, they’re so far gone they might as well be little stars in the sky.

Laura thinks Jester’s reaction to Caleb’s backstory would be much different than Caleb imagines it. Both Laura & Marisha talk about how Caleb’s convinced the moment people realize, they’re gone; there’s also the complication that Beau’s “comforting” is not actually that comforting. “She’d say, ‘you know, they won’t care,’” (which Marisha points out, Caleb would respond--how could someone not care about this?) when what she means is, “They love you and won’t abandon you over this.”

Laura and Marisha are both pumped about Caleb’s Wall of Fire--the walk to the dock was like “getting called to the principal’s office, except the principal is going to kill you.” Laura’s immediate reaction was regret she’d tossed the gems, but she loved his decision since she was panicking IRL & her heart was legit pounding. They also both get super enthusiastic bashing Nott’s plan to dump the haversack in an alley. “It’s bright pink! Someone would have definitely seen it!”

Marisha really misses Professor Thaddeus, but is convinced she’ll never see him again. Dani: “He’s your Nymeria, your Arya.” Marisha, tearfully: “He’s gonna come with his flock of owls and gouge out everyone’s eyes but ours.”

Laura’s convinced Sprinkle is magic, since he definitely should be dead twice over.

Quebec is for Lovers: After Dark edition

Neither Laura nor Marisha are cooking this year. Laura & Travis have no Thanksgiving plans at all this year. My gosh, if they were here my parents would be stuffing them full of turkey yesterday, even though they have no idea who they are.

Brian teases Max over messing with Trinket & carrying him back and forth in his car. Dani wants one TM where Brian isn’t mean to Max. Max, offscreen: “I’m FINE. I’m GOOD.” Marisha laughs that Max was okay with Brian’s teasing but shooting daggers at the TDs laughing.

Brian gives Dani an A for amazing and adorable, but not asshole.

Dani ships Percy/Vex, Keyleth/Vax, and Fjord/Jester. Close after is Kima/Allura & Caleb/Jester. She would be surprised if it happened, but wouldn’t object. Marisha asks, as a shipper, what does Dani look for in a quality ship. Dani likes clear feelings with clear reciprocation, canon connections; she doesn’t ship a ton of subtexty stuff.

Laura has been relistening to Vex’s playlists & crying. Both she & Marisha really miss Vex & Keyleth. Liam texted Laura the other day a fanvid of Vex & Vax that made her cry.

Marisha gets emotional seeing fanart of older Keyleth because it means that she’s living on & being happy. Noelle also came up & thanked Marisha for giving Tova a purpose after the latest Honey Heist, and everyone talks about how many hours they’ve spent creating and living in these people.

Marisha can’t listen to Tokyo Sunrise by LP anymore because it instantly makes her cry.

Beau is not a mindflayer. Everyone’s convinced, Marisha.

If Laura had Jester’s paint set, she’d draw home improvements. She’d draw a door for her bathroom into Ronin’s nursery. Marisha would draw more producers--”Not to undermine the ones I have! We’re so overworked!”

Brian looks to Max for the time left, only to have missed Dani literally just giving him the signal.

Brian starts to say he’ll see us next week, but Dani tells him not to confuse us since there’s no TM next week. Brian: “We’ll see you next week this Thursday Critical Role on youtube.com, Logan Paul guest starring, along with Paul Rudd, Rudney Dangerfield...”

Max, as the sound fades: “Okay, please...”

And that’s it for tonight. See you next time, everyone!

#critical role #critical role spoilers #talks machina #talks machina spoilers #long post for ts

434 notes · View notes

shamrock96 · 5 years ago

Text

So I’ve been thinking about Polyamory lately...

I started watching this show called Siren where this couple meets a mermaid and all three of them slowly start falling in love with each other and this is my first exposure to polyamorous representation and I think it’s a great triad relationship the writers have going here to explain the more complex emotions involved in a polyamorous relationship.

If anyone gets bored gong through this or knows you’re in for a long post as least know that this is the main idea of this post before scrolling past it: The best kind of love is a healthy tender relationship to people you can trust and who love you unconditionally.

Now I’m not poly myself, I don’t know what I am to be honest, so I don’t know what’s all involved. I’ve done research and I know that there are many different types of polyamory for it to just be whittled down to one example but what really strikes me and fascinates me about the polyamorous relationship depicted in Siren is the deep love and commitment each of the partners have with each other.

In the past I’ve joked about polyamory in the sense “haha let’s just forget this bogus love triangle and have everyone just get together” and after hearing other people’s stories and learning about their relationships I know there’s a lot more to it than just saying “screw it, let everyone just have sex!”

So I’ve put together a list of other possible areas where other writers could have gone this way. Because representation is important and love triangles have become an extremely cliché and toxic trope in television and movies to the point I don’t think writers really know what a healthy relationship between partners looks like anymore.

I got a lot of these from Triad of the Day but I just wanted to explain more in depth why I think these characters would be so good together

1. Veronica Lodge and Cheryl Blossom and Betty Cooper

So I’ve got to admit, I don’t actually watch Riverdale and this is probably a bad example to start with because my reasoning for these three being a triad is: just look at them. They’re obviously in love. And they can all still have their men on the side if that’s what they want but from what I’ve seen of gifs and on other people’s blogs, there is a strong feminine power here that transcends just being friends/frenemies/whatever.

2. Harley Quinn and Catwoman and Poison Ivy a.k.a The Gotham City Sirens

Harley and Poison Ivy are already renown for their amazing sapphic relationship but I feel like Catwoman is a good addition to their love because of how often she gets snubbed by Batman (a man she clearly has feelings for a who has feelings for her) for embracing her darker side. Harley, more than anyone, understands being sidelined and downright abused by someone you care about and I think Poison Ivy would praise Selina for embracing the side of her that come more naturally. Harley and Poison Ivy already have a great and more or less healthy (as healthy as trauma inflicted villains can be) and Selina could really use some of that love in her life.

This is also probably my inspiration for the whole Veronica/Cheryl/Betty triad I have above.

3. Kathy and Don and Cosmo

Again, so I haven’t really seen this movie in its entirety yet (just bits and pieces) but I’ve seen enough to know they were all just meant to be together. Especially in the “Good Morning” number where they talk about “danced the whole night through”. Like what is better than one person finding two other people they can laugh and have fun together until dawn? This just seems super figured out to me.

4. Miles O'brien and Keiko O'brien and Kira Nerys

This is one where I think things get a little complicated for so many reasons. For starters it’s a great example how a polytriad relationship works when children are involved. For those who aren’t familiar with Star Trek: Deep Space 9, the story between these three are that Miles and Keiko have been married ever since they were on Star Trek: The Next Generation. They even have a daughter who is about four when the couple are expecting their next baby. Due to a transporter malfunction Kira is accidentally impregnated with Keiko’s baby. This was the writers’ way of explaining Kira’s actress, Nana Visitor’s, own pregnancy (coincidently with other co-star, Alexander Siddig, but that’s a whole other story).

Anyways, once Kira is unexpectedly carrying the O’Brien’s child she moves in with them so that they can still experience the pregnancy and become closer to their new surrogate. As a result Kira also becomes closer to the O’Brien’s and their daughter Molly. The birth of Kirayoshi is a really touching episode and it’s obvious that Kira has become extremely attached to the baby. After the birth the O’Briens make Kira Kirayoshi’s godmother (and also kind of name him after her) and she becomes a part of the family, like an aunt.

The only reason this gets complicated is because of Kira’s work relationship with Miles. While Kira and Keiko become super close and it could easily have turned into something romantic there’s not a lot of that bonding going on with Miles. And I know there are relationships where person A (Kieko) has a strong relationship with persons B (Miles) and C (Kira) but persons B and C aren’t as close, but my main objective in putting these characters together is to form a perfect triad where everyone loves and is loved equally. The writers could have also easily done this by having Kira and Miles bond more emotionally rather than professionally but they didn’t so we don’t get to see what that would have looked like except in fanfiction.

5. Elphaba and Galinda and Fiyero

Like I think a majority of the fans of Wicked agree that these three were all in love one way or the other. Some ship Glinda and Elphaba, Glinda shipped herself with Fiyero, and the mainstream is that Elphaba and Fiyero utlimately belonged together. And while the musical puts a heavy emphasis on the “friendship” between Glinda and Elphaba, anyone who ever watches “For Good” can tell you that their relationship was way deeper than your average best friends or sisters for that matter. Not to mention in “One Short Day” the two fo them make a point of saying “we’re just two friends” “two good friends” “two best friends”. The whole “just friends” has been used to keep LGBT+ couples in the closet since forever.

We also know Fiyero and Elphaba were given a wonderfully laid out relationship which has a very important role in the musical. Fiyero’s relationship with Glinda can be analyzed as what society wants to see vs. Fiyero and Elphaba’s relationship which is something society doesn’t want to see. Perfect vs. Unconventional. HOWEVER, Fiyero and Glinda did have a connection, so much so that Glinda did mourn losing him (to her “best friend” nonetheless). The reverse could also be argued that Glinda was mourning losing Elphaba to Fiyero. OR it could be argued that the two people she loved most ran off into the sunset (albeit, as fugitives) without her and she was left behind. In a polyamorous relationship nobody would be left behind singing a reprise of “I’m Not That Girl”. I haven’t seen the full musical in a while but I think Elphaba gave Glinda the chance to come with her and Fiyero and Glinda opted to stay behind in the public figure position she was given. I could be wrong about that, like I said I haven’t seen the musical in a while, but if I’m not wrong the that decision to stay behind could have all sorts of different analyses for the relationship between the three.

Let’s not forget to mention that Glinda and Elphaba were ROOMMATES! Ok, memes aside, these three had a lot of chemistry and history together that bonded them. For me, one of the saddest parts of the ending wasn’t the “For Good” scene where Elphaba “sacrifices” herself because Glinda knew full well what Elphaba had planned with Fiyero, leaving Glinda as the last one standing and being the one left behind to fix the corrupt government in the land of Oz. She was sad because she knew Elphaba had to stay dead in the eyes of the people if she was ever going to live a normal life after all that had happened. The actual ending of the book is way sadder so I’ll take the canon ending of the musical any day but I can’t help but feel like the life Elphaba and Fiyero started after running off into their official sunset probably felt a little incomplete without Glinda.

6. DJ Fuller and Steve Hale and Matt Harmon

THIS ONE. Never has an audience ever been given the run around about a heteronormative live triangle than they have been with Fuller House. As soon as I saw this on Triad of the Day’s list of polyamorous couples I was just like YES! When DJ chose Steve I was a little skeptical and torn. Both of these men seemed really great and had great chemistry with DJ. I stan the whole decision for DJ to choose herself the first time around and take some time to figure out who she was (especially so soon after the death of her husband). But immediately after that decision the writers went and gave Steve and Matt a great bro relationship. THEY EVEN HAD STEVE AND MATT KISS!!!! Although that was before they became friends. And they were SO into that kiss and we ALL loved it! The fact that it was used for laughs is such a pity. Fuller House could have pulled a Modern Family by creating a positive social commentary on polyamorous families and play off the title of the show (Fuller House) more than they already do by adding both men to the family. Instead one of them got pushed away and to be honest I stopped watching after season 2. I love the wholesome family vibes Fuller House gives out and even the ones given out by Hallmark (which Candace Cameron Bure and Lori Laughlin are major actresses in) but something these wholesome shows and tv networks forget is that you can represent LGBT+ relationships without the emphasis of sex. It’s like if someone were to pitch a gay Christmas romance movie to Hallmark the board would immediately say, “Nice idea, but this is a family friendly program.” My definition of family friendly is a group of adults who are in loving and healthy relationships with each other who all love and take care of the children in their lives. And my definition of wholesome is lack of profanity and vulgar humor and displays honest values (just for the record).

Fuller House really missed out on taking a step forward into the modern age by not making these three a polyamorous triad.

7.Victor Van Dort and Emily and Victoria Everglot

So I’m not sure about this one because I REALLY love how it ended (with Emily getting justice for her murder and then being emotionally liberated to the point she burst into a kaleidoscope of butterflies). Not to mention Emily and Victoria didn’t exactly get much bonding time throughout the movie though I think Emily can heavily relate to Victoria’s overly sheltered life and especially to getting screwed over in the marriage department (although Victoria luckily dodged that bullet). But I feel like that would make Emily (and Victor) all the more protective of Victoria when it comes to those who would abuse her. And maybe Emily could have taught both Victor and Victoria more about standing up for themselves. I know Emily can seem naive and like she doesn’t have much life experience (for obvious reasons) but we’ve seen how strong, powerful, and dedicated she is. I don’t think anybody would be surprised if Emily scorched the earth for Victor and Victoria. Also Victor needs some strong women in his life. I feel like the implications of what these three would have been like in a polyamorous relationship is pretty obvious and has no doubt been written about a thousand times in fanfiction. As much as I love Emily being released from what was tying her down to earth, this would have been a good alternative ending as well.

8. Tulio is dating Miguel and Chel

These guys. Need I say more?

I think I might because while we see the obvious attraction between Tulio and Chel and the fanmade art and fanfiction of Tulio and Miguel, that still leaves out the question of what Chel and Miguel’s relationship would be like. Obviously in the movie Miguel wasn’t a big fan of Chel moving in on his and Tulio’s “bromance” and while jealousy doesn’t have much place in an ideal triad relationship (from what I understand anyway), I think they could make good partners in crime.

9. Flora and Fauna and Merryweather a.k.a the Three Good Fairies

Now these hoes. I’ve heard some dispute somewhere that they may or may not be sisters but I distinctly remember them only being referred to as “the three good fairies”. Older women (fairies) who have known each other for a very long time. But they dead ass raised a daughter together as mortals, in the same cottage for 16 years. We’ve seen said cottage and we’ve seen Aurora’s bedroom but anyone can see that there’s no way there was enough from in that cottage for 3 individual bedrooms or even one room for three twin beds (maybe bunk beds if they had existed in the 14th century). They’re depicted as incompetent characters in Malificent but they aren’t that way in the 1959 Sleeping Beauty. In fact, they’re portrayed as willing to do anything for their daughter. Not to mention the constant bickering of Flora and Merryweather being pacified by Fauna. That is typical married old couple behavior right there. Being 1959 there’s no way anyone was ready for a polyamorous triad of fairies in a children’s animated feature but that’s basically what they gave us.

10. Nancy Wheeler and Steve Harrington and Jonathan Byers

This is also a hard one. Because similar to Glinda and Fiyero’s relationship Steve and Nancy were together for high school politics. In this scenario Steve is Glinda because he gets left behind to ponder on his life as a shallow popular high school king. But protecting Jonathan and Nancy with that homemade nail bat from that demagorgan is what any good partner would do for his other partners.

The reason this one is tricky is not only because Steve got left behind but also because the relationship dynamic is pretty unequal. Because while Nancy and Steve are together at the beginning of Season 2, it’s clear they’re still putting on a facade that things can go back to normal for them during their senior year of high school. By the end of Season 2 Nancy is officially with Jonathan and Steve is not only left behind but he’s left behind to take care of the kids.

Not to mention Steve and Jonathan don’t necessarily have a good relationship with each other. Although I think Steve has been humbled down in Season 3 after realizing his glory days are more or less behind him. But we don’t get a lot of interaction between these three anymore.

I’m not really sure where I’m going with this one besides the fact that I think there’s some potential somewhere here. Especially with the introduction of Robin. I feel like she could be a great sexual awakening for a lot of the characters in this show.

BONUS: Bellamy Blake and Clarke Griffin and just about anyone

It doesn’t have to be Raven. Honestly it could be any character who has a good relationship with both Clark and Bellamy. I think it’s safe to say a majority of the fandom is holding out for Bellark to ride off into their sunset but I think they’d be pretty inclusive to someone else they have a strong relationship with. I haven’t watched the series in a really long time so I don’t know if there is a character left alive who fits that description but the characters have definitely formed a pack mentality of survival and sticking close. I imagine if they (Clark, Bellamy, and their third partner) would have kids they’d have the same protective circle.

#My posts #my ot3

15 notes · View notes

howlingheartdemigod · 6 years ago

Text

my sister sent me this list of post breakup aus and i was like “oh cool angst” and she was like “do one that’s not angst” and I was like “??? i can’t do that” and she was like “try” and i was like “eh” but then the next day i referred to a salamander as a ‘pokit frien,’ implied this was sustainable if i just ��put watr in pokit’ and called a salamander ‘watr snek with leg perfect goblin frien’ and she stopped emailing me so i had to bribe her by giving her PC in our DnD game more money, she's a rogue so this is always effective, and promising to write this so. in case you were wondering. prompt of “are you?? sabotaging?? my dates?!?!?” courtesy of @followthebraingrape

thank you for editing and for kicking me when i say mean things about myself. you’re a good big sister.

title from sara bareilles’ if i can’t have you

thankful that i held you at all

The first time must have been a coincidence. Beau told herself it was a coincidence. Yasha didn’t even like going clubbing. Beau had a very vivid memory of Yasha pulling her close in their- no, Yasha’s kitchen. Beau had never technically moved in, not hers, never hers- twirling her slowly to music only they could hear, telling Beau she liked a different type of dancing better.

“Face to face, body to body,” Yasha’d told her, voice low. “Skin to skin.” Beau remembered shivering with the words. Yasha claimed she wasn’t good with words, but she always had the ones to make Beau’s knees go weak.

So, a coincidence. A fluke. A completely unfathomable mistake that Yasha was at the same club she and Vorsah had come to. She must have been there for work. Must have been called in to work as a bodyguard, or… Beau wasn’t sure. She couldn’t possibly be standing there because Beau had posted about waiting in line on her snapchat story. Yasha barely used her snapchat. Coincidence.

Beau was staring at Yasha, who was sitting at the bar, eyes searching the crowd, until a blue blur came and wrapped her arms around her. “Beau!” Jester shouted, voice cutting through the loud music. “I didn’t know you came here!” Jester pulled back, taking Beau’s hands, wide smile, indigo curls bouncing with her movement, eyes glinting with trouble.

Beau returned Jester’s smile, shaking her head clear. “First time coming here.” She replied, the light and music coming back into focus, the feeling of sweat hanging in the too warm air. Beau glanced back to the bar, finding Yasha looking at her. ‘No, at Jester. Clearly that’s the only reason she’s here. No one can say no to Jester.’ She told herself. “What are you doing here?” she asked Jester, pretending that she hadn’t seen Yasha. Pretending she didn’t know Yasha existed, in fact. She’d never seen Yasha before in her life, why would she care?

“Oh, you know. I wanted to dance. Yasha came with!” Jester said around a mouthful of mischief. “Fjord is out of town visiting Vandren, and Molly was busy, and Nott is busy with wedding stuff, and Caleb and Caduceus are boring and never want to do anything fun. And you didn’t respond to my messages, so it’s just me and Yasha.”

Beau shifted a little, looking back where she’d left Vorsha, waiting for a drink. “Oh, yeah, uh, sorry I saw them but I… I’m here on a date so I didn’t reply.”

Jester bounced a little, letting out an excited squeal. “Who with? Can I meet her?” Jester’s eyes scanned the crowd behind Beau’s shoulder.

“Oh, uh,” Beau turned her head to find her date looking somewhat annoyed, staring at them. Beau shot her an apologetic smile, and gave a shrug. This was complicating things. This was a hookup, not a date. Jester always wanted things to be like in one of her romcoms and this… was not. This was physical. This was nothing like what she’d had with-

“Oh Yasha!” Jester’s voice cut through her thoughts, and Beau turned her head to see Yasha joining them, looking like a dream. Beau couldn’t help the way her heart skipped, seeing the amazon-esque woman approach.

Get your shit together, Beauregard. Beau commanded silently, dropping one of Jester’s hands. You are not a teen with a first time crush. You are experienced. You are a damn delight. Yasha not seeing that is not on you.

“Hey Yasha.” Beau said, chin lifting a little.

“Hello, Beauregard. Fancy seeing you here.” Yasha’s smile was soft, something in her eyes making Beau want to kiss her.

Beau swallowed, turning back to Jester. “You wanted to meet Vorsah right?” Beau said, “Follow me.” She pulled Jester along, pretending she didn’t care if Yasha followed. Pretending it was all fine and good. Pretending she didn’t give a rats ass about if Yasha was jealous or not. Still when Beau dropped down next to Vorsah, and turned her head to find Yasha had trailed along with, she felt a little spark of victory. This was a chance, an opportunity to make her jealous. It was perfect. “V, this is Jester, a friend of mine. And this is Yasha.” She said, waving vaguely, at them, angling her body towards the silver haired woman she was with. Take that Yasha. She’s hot as hell and she wants to fuck me. Who cares if you don’t.

Beau put her hand on Vorsah’s thigh, trailing her fingers back and forth, putting on her dumbest, most vapid smile. Tracy, the alter ego that was all too easy to put on.

Vorsah looked at Beau, then Jester, who was moving to sit down on the purple velvet lined couch on Vorsah’s other side, then to Yasha, who, Beau realized, now looked deeply uncomfortable, like she always did in clubs. Not relaxed like when she’d just been talking to Beau. “Hello,” Vorsah said, “Nice to meet you both. Did you remember my drink?” Beau stiffened. She hadn’t. She’d been so caught up in the idea of making Yasha even the slightest bit regretful she’d forgotten that the goal was to get drunk and get laid.

“Oh my gods, I’m an idiot.” Beau said laughing a little. “I’ll be right back.” She pushed to her feet, letting her hand trail over Vorsah’s shoulder as she went. Beau weaved her way through the crowd, letting her shoulders slowly drop. What are the fucking odds that the one night Jester decides she wants to go out dancing, Yasha’s the only one available to go with her. And is the night that Beau’s out on a date at the same club?! Beau ordered the drinks, and two shots for herself, which she downed in quick succession, before turning to head back to their corner. That was annoying too. They were well on their way from dancing to making out. That was the whole point of the dark corner, the couch, the drinks. Beau loved Jester, but she was also firmly in the Ban Jester from every club camp.

What do you need a club for anyway, Jes? Beau thought at her loudly. You don’t even drink.

Beau returned to find that Yasha sitting on the small table in front of the couch, taking up more space than was strictly necessary. Vorsah had angled herself towards Jester, to accommodate.

Beau put on another fake smile, this one tinged with a smirk, and went to drop next to Vorsah despite Yasha’s knees knocking the couch. Beau just tossed her legs up over Yasha’s, her thighs resting on Yasha’s knees. She watched, out of the corner of her eye, Yasha’s lips part, her breath catch. She knew this move. Beau would do this, or some variation, to draw her out, to pull her in. Watching movies on the couch, she’d drape herself across Yasha, after long hikes she’d dramatically throw herself into Yasha’s arms. Beau liked touch more than Yasha thought to give her, so Beau would go out of her way to find it. And Beau knew, looking how she looked; flushed, sweaty, hair mussed from dancing, crop top twisted, she knew that she looked like all those nights she’d go grab them some waters from the kitchen and come back to bed and throw her legs over Yasha’s to keep her from running, from pulling away. She handed Vorsah her drink and looked to Jester, who was chattering along. “What we talking about?”

Jester looked to her, a devious sparkle glinting in her eyes. “Oh, I was just telling Vorsah all about the Traveler, and how he’s so cool. And how much fun he is. And-”

All of Beau’s hopes about getting laid went out the window, for two reasons. One, when Jester started talking about the Traveler, that was the end of the night, lights out, go home. Jester could talk about the Traveler for hours and not get bored. Beau even thought the Traveler seemed like a chill dude, (Was it disrespectful to call a god a chill dude? Beau still wasn’t sure,) but he wasn’t exactly the topic she’d pick to set the mood.

And reason two... Reason two was a calloused hand rested on her knee, a rough thumb tracing impossibly soft paths back and forth across it. Beau glanced to Yasha, who’s gaze was steady on Jester. Beau swallowed, and she saw, almost imperceptibly, the corner of Yasha’s mouth lift, and then it was gone.

Beau didn’t get laid that night, and Vorsah, hot as she was, didn’t get a call for another date. Not when all Beau could think of was Yasha’s hand on her leg.

The second time it happened seemed a little more suspicious. Beau wasn’t a particularly paranoid person, but in two weeks, two different people had stood her up or flaked out on her and it was starting to feel like a pattern.

So, when she finally was out with someone, it was just one step too weird that Yasha and Molly were getting lunch at the same damn fucking dinner.

When she saw them enter and sit, she let out a long sigh, sinking down in the red and white booth.

“What… What are you doing?” Avantika, an ‘old friend’ of Fjord’s, was squinting at her from across the table. Avantika was undoubtedly hot, and though she’d been a little bit of a bitch off the bat, there was a certain amount of asshole behavior Beau could overlook if the offender was also super hot.

Beau wondered if she herself was hot enough for Avantika to overlook that she was acting like a hot slice of crazy. Beau grimaced, and laughed a little. “Uh, just, well…”

“Beauregard!” Molly’s voice cut through her flimsy excuse, sweeping towards them with his arms out. “What are the odds!?” He dropped down next to Avantika, the smirk on his lips leaving no question that he knew he was being a dick.

“Mollymauk.” Beau replied, scowling. She was so caught up in her annoyance with him she didn’t notice Yasha had followed until she was leaning against the booth, smiling fondly at Molly. Beau’s eyes caught on her, unable to pull away. She looked fucking great. Beau heart skipped when Yasha looked to her. “Hey.” Beau managed.

“Hello.” Yasha replied, her gaze piercing. Beau’s lips pulled into a smile involuntarily, and Yasha’s grew in return. It was instinctive, the joy, a long ingrained habit she’d never shake.

A delicate accented voice across the table called Beau, and it took her a second to pull her gaze back to her date.

You are on a date, you nightmare. Beau reminded herself. Not here to make eyes at a woman who doesn’t want to date your disaster ass anyway.

“Friends of yours Beauregard?” Avantika asked, brow lifting.

“Oh, goodness, Yahsa how rude we are. Where are my manners-”

“You never had any.” Beau muttered, earning a snicker from Yasha as she dropped into the booth next to her.

“I’m Mollymauk Tealeaf. Molly to my friends.” He offered a hand with a flourish, and as much of a bow as he could manage in the booth.

Avantika looked at his hand, at his signature bomber jacket, then his face, and turned away. The look on her face left a sour taste in Beau’s mouth. “And you?” She asked, gaze directed at Yasha.

The pale woman’s brow lifted, glancing to Beau. “Oh, I’m, uh…”

“This is Yasha. ‘nother friend of mine.” Beau said, gesturing vaguely. “Yasha, Molly, this is Avantika. Fjord set us up.” Avantika stiffened, gaze flicking away at Fjord’s name, but Beau continued regardless. “I know these two from… Well, it’s… kinda convoluted how we know each other, and sounds dumb saying it.”

“We met at the carnival.” Molly said with a toothy grin.

“At the school carnival.” Yasha corrected. “Freshman mixer.”

“Yeah, I already knew Fjord and Jester-” Beau began to smile, thinking of all their antics, but Avantika cut her off with a raise of her hand.

“As fascinating as I’m sure you all find this story,” She purred, voice low, her gaze making Beau feel like she was a mouse making a cats job too difficult. “If we’re going to continue this, I’d like to continue it alone.”

Beau felt a little flame of annoyance spark up. Avantika had already been a bitch, then she acted like Molly’s meer presence was a distasteful (which, come on, she was the only one allowed to be a dick to Molly,and that’s after years of actual friendship,) on top of cutting Beau off mid sentence.

“Then I guess we won’t get to continue it.” Beau said, looking down her nose at Avantika.

The redhead sputtered a moment, then slid out the opposite side of the booth and stormed towards the door.

“Well she seemed just grand.” Molly said, scooting over to pick through Avantika’s fries.

Beau let out a little groan. “Two minutes, I think that’s a record in how long it takes you to ruin one of my dates.” She said, scowling at him.

“Oh, no way.” He argued. “I once dumped a drink on that girl’s shoes, she peeled out of there so fucking fast, oh what was her name.”

Beau scowled. “Eliza?”

“Ellie.” Yasha said, taking a sip of a soda Beau only realized was hers once it was back down in front of her. “That’s not your record, surely. There was that time you invited yourself to our first date.” Beau’s eyes cut over to her, shocked to hear her mention it. They hadn’t spoken of their relationship near each other since it ended.

“Well, that didn’t ruin the night, it enhanced it.” Molly replied, leaning towards Yasha, signature smile on.

Yasha’s laugh was enough to let Beau ignore the butterflies kicking up wind in her stomach.

Later, she couldn't even be mad at Molly and Yasha for crashing. She was mad at Molly for sticking her with the bill, though. She felt justified in that.

The final dagger in Beau’s “there’s a conspiracy against me getting laid” theory came when she was hanging out with Keg.

She’d already gone on two more failed dates at that point, one of them interrupted by Nott needing her to come help with something immediately which turned out to be a question about which buttons to use up the back of her wedding gown, an event Yasha also happened to be called in for. The next one was even more of a disaster. In the time it took to call asking for the wait time at the restaurant and getting there, every table had been reserved with a cash advance. The hostess apologized, and told Beau about some celebrity woman needing the venue for the evening. Which sounded like exactly the sort of thing Marion Lavore, or someone doing a great impression of her, would do. Yasha being at the restaurant next door, picking up takeout, icing on the date ruining cake.

But those easily could have been coincidences.

Could have been, but she doubted it. She was of the opinion that Nott, Molly, and Jester were all conspiring together to keep her single until Yasha decided to take her back which was, frankly, ridiculous. Yasha had always been too good for her. Beau knew that was always going to be the inevitable end. And why would it have been their business anyway, it’s not like Beau stuck her nose into their love lives. If and when she did she was totally justified. She’d been right with Nott and Yeza, and Fjord and Jester. This was totally different. Totally completely different.

And if she kept telling herself that she might start to believe it.

Keg was the best person Beau had known in high school, and the only person she’d dated. She was the only person she’d kept in contact with from home when she’d cut off contact with her parents four months into sophomore year, the only person she’d wanted to. Keg had been her sanity trying to figure out being queer in a small town with homophobic parents. Keg was also bat shit crazy and a horrible influence.

She was an asshole. Most of Beau’s friends were assholes, it’s how she liked it. She had a two non-asshole rule, and between Caduceus and Jester, those slots were full.

She was also just that, a friend. Beau and Keg had agreed that them dating was so nonfunctional the first time, it wasn’t worth ever trying again. Breaking up had been less upsetting and more the agreed upon conclusion to the mess they were. They were still friends, of course, so as soon as she found out Keg was going to be in town they made plans, but not a date.

A distinction she didn’t make clear when she told Jester, Molly, or Nott. She needed to test her theory.

She and Keg were playing pool when the door opened, a Zemnian accent floating to her ears despite the distance and the chatter. She could clock Caleb from miles away. He’d never been subtle in his life.

“Fucking hell.” she muttered, glancing toward the door, watching a gaggle of familiar people enter. “Those absolute fuckers.”

“Hm?” Keg replied around a sip of her beer. Beau tracked her gaze to a tall blonde in the corner. Beau hit her with the blunt end of her cue stick. “Hey!” Keg replied gaze flicking back. “I’m listening, asshole.”

“Oh, what did I say then?” Beau’s gaze was still tracking her group of friends, all of them, and Yeza, which was especially rare these days with the business picking up. She saw the small smile on Yasha’s lips, watched the tall woman’s gaze flick about the bar, then saw it stop on her. Beau didn’t break her gaze, instead hitting Yasha with a soft smile. The look of shock on Yasha’s face was enough.

“Something about fucking, I think.” Keg replied, leaning on the table. “Which, I thought we were on the same page about, but I guess not.”

“Shut up.” Beau set down the cue, turning to lean herself, facing Keg. “You remember my college friends right? Just walked in. I think at least a few of them are trying to ruin my love life on behalf of another one of them.”

Keg’s eyes shot over, taking the motley crew by the bar. Beau turned her gaze just in time to see Yasha look away. “Is Nott here?” Keg asked a fond smile on her lips. She and Nott had met one weekend when Keg was in town, and had disappeared for hours, coming back the next day with a story neither would tell. “Nott’s the best.”

“Nott is one of the ones trying to ruin my chances of getting laid.” Beau replied arms crossing.

“Yeah, yeah, big deal.” Keg replied, waving a hand at Beau. “Are we going over there are are you going to keep bitching that your friends love and care about you?”

“They… You are… making a lot of assumptions without much knowledge.” Beau sputtered.

“They want to hook you and the tall, hot one back up.” Keg replied, turning her gaze back. “I agree. You’ve been a fucking downer since that ended.”

Beau opened her mouth for a rebuttal, but a familiar voice called out, “Keg!” and before she could, a small dark blur of color flung itself at Keg.

Beau sighed, setting her cue down, leaning on the table as Keg returned the hug in her typical bad-at-this manner.

“Nice to see you too Nott.” Beau lifted her drink in a greeting.

“I saw you yesterday.” Nott replied, instead of dignifying Beau’s annoyance with a proper response.

Beau let out a little sigh, heading over to the bar without another word. Her friends, the nightmare of color she called her family, were gathered around one edge of the bar. Caleb and Fjord were mid argument about who knows what, while Molly, Caduceus, and Yasha were locked in a quiet conversation, Molly and Yasha looking intense, Caduceus looking confused. The three fell silent as Beau drew near, Yasha’s eyes on the floor.

“Oh, Beau!” Jester was spinning on the stool as Beau drew near, a soda in hand, smiling wickedly. “I didn’t know you’d be here.”

“Mhmm.” Beau replied, brow lifting. “Sure Jester.” Jester smiled at her sweetly, and Beau scowled. “You’re ridiculous.” she said, “You too, Mollymauk.”

Molly put a hand on his chest offended. “Beau, I don’t know what you mean.”

“Fuck you, Molly.”

“Fuck you too, Beau.”

“Molly.” Yasha’s voice was soft, nearly pleading. It drew Beau’s gaze to her face. She was flushed, flustered. Yasha was almost never flustered. Beau shook it off, looking back to Molly and Jester.

“You both, and Nott for that matter, need to cut the crap, alright? Yasha do you even know the nonsense they’re up to?” she asked, brow lifting.

“What we are up to?” Molly replied, looking to Yasha. “How’d blame get shifted to us?”

“Yeah, it wasn’t my idea!” Jester replied, straightening up.

“The execution was all you.” Yasha replied, pointing at her. “I was kidding.”

“You don’t kid.” Molly replied, looking at her through his lashes. “And the second time was your idea too.”

“You all continued the… Okay, well you know I was in the right on that one.” Yasha replied, arms crossing.

Beau’s eyes flitted between them confusion in her gaze. “What?”

“That Avantika was a character though. Fjord must have been on something strong back then.” Molly mused, drawing Fjords glare briefly, before he turned back to his and Caleb’s conversation.

“I’m sorry, what?” Beau repeated.

“If you had just turned off twitter notifications we probably would have stopped. It was just so sad seeing you get annoyed when ever your phone dinged.” Jester continued to Yasha with a pout.

“What the fuck?” Beau said, voice raising. “You…” she pointed to Yasha. “You’re the one sabotaging my dates?”

Yasha went still and silent, lips parted, staring at Beau like maybe she’d forget the conversation if Yasha didn’t reply.

“You thought we were messing with you of our own accord?” Molly asked, brow lifting.

“Come on, Beau.” Jester replied, head tilting. “You know my pranks are less destructive than this.”

Beau’s gaze was on Jester when Yasha started to move, a step back, then turning, then rushing towards the door.

Beau’s lips parted in offense. “You… You’ve got to be kidding me.” She muttered, before turning to chase Yasha out.

Beau caught the form of Yasha around the building and sprinted to catch up with the taller woman. At the edge of the parking lot, summer air hot and sticky, the sun starting to slowly set, she managed to get a hand on Yasha’s wrist. “Hold up,” She said, planting herself on the asphalt. “Just, come on Yasha.” she said, head shaking, a pained smile on her lips. “What… the fuck. You dumped me.”

Yasha turned back to her, framed by clouds and orange and pink light, eyes not quite meeting Beau’s. “I… am aware of that.”

“So…” Beau prompted when Yasha didn’t elaborate.

“I was trying to come up with a way to… fix that.” She said, eyes flicking over Beau’s face then steadfastly over Beau’s shoulder. “In my defense I was kidding when I told Jester we should crash your date. And when I told Molly that we should get lunch where you and that horrible redhead were.”

Beau nodded a little. “How about when Nott called me, or when the Ruby suddenly needed a venue? All someone else's idea?”

Yasha’s lips pressed in that way they did when Beau caught her in a lie. “I can’t… say that exactly.”

Beau shook her head, then reached to pull Yasha down by her collar, kissing her without another moment of hesitation. “This is the dumbest plan to win me back ever.” she muttered against her lips.

Yasha’s hands found Beau’s waist, and Beau could taste her smile. “Maybe.” She admitted.

“Definitely.” Beau replied, pulling back. “Just to clarify, you don’t have to ruin our dates going forward. You should make sure your helpers know that too.”

Yasha laughed, and pulled Beau into another kiss. “I’ll let them know.”

#beauyasha #critrole #mine #critical role #my sister made me write this #my writing #trying to use my power for good not evil #or… fluff not angst #to be cross posted on ao3

36 notes · View notes