#anyway genuinely hope they're having a great time
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The Great Wave - Chapter 11 Review
âźď¸SPOILERS FOR THE CHAPTERâźď¸
And we're back!! Yay!!
It felt like a year since I've done these but I'm so happy we get to see what happened after that ANNOYING ASS cliffhanger.
And omg after reading this, I genuinely had so many more questions!!
So without further ado, LET'S DO THIS SHIT
We go back to where we've been before, aka seeing these three goobers choking up from that damn blueberry.
I'd like to point out that this is one of the rarest times where we get to see colored blood in the manga. I get that we've seen them bleed before, but the red popping up like that really made me miss it đĽ°đĽ°
đđ
Hotass masochist is at it again-
Anyways, Grougalorasalar brings Yugo and Adamai in their memories đwithout their consentđ and...he actually never saw the Inglorium damn.
Daddy Grougalorasalar already has beef with these two morons so just imagine how he must be feeling from the fact that not only did they cause a lot of problems (without meaning to) in the world, but they also got to visit the gods' realm before him.
This guy might have lived far longer than these two and even he didn't see this place before them....
But what actually makes me confused here is that bro not only hates Yugo but is actually curious about what kinda shit he's gonna do next.
Like yeah he hates Yugo for doing shit he didn't mean to but at the same time he's waiting for him to do more shit cuz he's curious. Does...does Grougalorasalar like to cause trouble to people and to himself??
Omg...he's such a slut for pain i can't-
Yugo....sweetie...no đ
A huge part of me knew he was still going to act recklessly and charge at Grougalorasalar without thinking. But on the other hand, a small part of me mindlessly hoped that he'd be more aware of the situation he was in. But at least it just goes to show that Yugo never lost his tendency to charge at the enemy ever since season 1.
Fun fact, in french, Yugo is yelling at him because he doesn't understand why Grougalorasalar would cause problems to "good people". I love how we still get to see his kid side resurfacing from time to time because that was the most stupidest thing a grown man could say.
YES!! THANK YOU!! THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT WE WANT TO KNOW!!
You have no idea how annoyed I felt when we got no answers as to why the other gods weren't present in Inglorium. I understood that it was because Tot wanted to explain their disappearances in Waven but I was still very into this mystery cuz it puts the eliatrope goddess in a bad light.
So to hear Grougalorasalar mention Inglorium's crumbled state makes me really happy to see cuz we get to at least dig on that topic.
OOOFFFFFâźď¸âźď¸âźď¸
NO YUGO HE'S GOT A POINT YOUR MOTHER WAS SO SUS âźď¸âźď¸âźď¸
This is what I mean when I say that his mom needs to be held accountable, there's something seriously suspicious about someone who gives off weird vibes when they're supposed to be known as the goddess of LOVE AND CREATION.
I did not even think that Grougalorasalar knew about the state of the gods' realm, but it just goes to show that primordial dragons are aware of the world's situations and what goes beyond it.
But what shocked me the most in this chapter was that not only did Grougalorasalar know about the Inglorium being in shambles, BUT HE ALSO KNOWS WHO YUGO AND ADAMAI'S FATHER IS AND THAT THE GODDESS APPARENTLY INTERACTED WITH HIM BEFORE SEEING YUGO AND THE OTHERS.
There is a lot to unpack here just by reading these three panels.
First, Grougalorasalar confirmed to us that it was the Eliatrope goddess' fault that the other gods are not here. Back when someone asked her what had happened to the other gods, she simply dodged the question.
Second, Grougalorasalar claims that when the goddess got saved by Nora and Efrim, she went straight to her lover and freed him to take revenge on the other gods. This means that the goddess can, in fact, express feelings not related to pure emotions like love and compassion. She's like everyone else and does have faults of her own. This also proves us that this lover of hers is a very dangerous one. He's such a threat, in fact, that he was able to completely destroy the Inglorium and leave no traces as to where the other gods may have gone. We also got to know that her lover was angry. He may have been furious because the goddess had been imprisoned just like him. Why was he imprisoned? We don't know.
And third, Adamai doesn't know who their father is. It may seem very random that I'm mentioning him but it does make sense. Adamai had been taught and raised by Grougaloragran so he must've known who their father was. But judging by how Adamai seemed just as eager to know like Yugo, he never got to know who he is which means Grougaloragran, back in his prime, didn't know either.
But there are two people in Season 4 who must've known and those were Qilby and Nora.
The reason why Qilby knows is pretty obvious: he cannot forget a single thing from his millions of lives. So he must've known at some point who his father was.
And the reason why Nora knows is because she was assisting the goddess. Right after she saved her and had no choice but to leave Efrim behind to the necromes, she accompanied the goddess to free her father and then went with her to get the elite eliatropes.
If Qilby and Nora had still been alive, they would've explained everything to Yugo and Adamai, but we know that Tot loves to not reveal anything to these two đđ
Now for those who are not aware or haven't heard, Yugo and Adamai's father is not the Great Dragon apparently.
In an interview with Tot, he claimed that their father wasn't the Great Dragon and that the answer would be revealed soon.
So....take that as what you will.
Personally, it doesn't make any sense that he couldn't be the father because not only have we been told time and time again that the Great Dragon and the Goddess made the primordial eliatropes together, but we've also been told that he was also the one who created the krosmoz with her.
Now yes, he did take part in making the krosmoz it's just that Tot retconned the fact that he was the father of the primordial eliatropes.
It would've made much more sense if the Great Dragon was the father because it would explain why he had been imprisoned by the other gods for being too deadly.
But who knows, maybe Tot does have a good answer to all of this, and we've just never seen him before because he's a new character that had been hidden in the shadows all this time.
And speaking of Tot....
Remember when he said that Armand's name was supposed to be spelled with the letter 't' at the end?
Well...
THE CHAPTER LITERALLY ADDRESSES ARMAND WITH THE LETTER 'D' LIKE IT ALWAYS HAS BEEN âźď¸âźď¸
You mean to tell me that this guy got so fed up with everyone from 'butchering' Armand's name when the seasons, the credits, the ovas, the mangas, and even the artbooks CALL HIM WITH A D.
Come on Tot just admit that you personally like to call him that cuz his name reminds you of a relative of yours. Because you make no sense when the show and the books have called him the exact opposite. Cuz if you keep doing that, we're just gonna break our heads and seriously wonder if we should trust your words over the canon source material that we've grown up with.
But anyways â¨ď¸â¨ď¸
Not only did this chapter reveal that the goddess is sus, that we learned what happened when she got freed, that we know that Yugo and Adamai's father is not the Great Dragon, and that Tot makes his own headcanons, but we also got to see another character's name make a reveal in this chapter.
Why is Harebourg's name mentioned and why did Grougalorasalar tell them not to have messed with him. đđđ
Look....
If his name being mentioned is because he's the official antagonist of Season 5, then I will die screaming from the top of a hill.
If not, then idk why Grougalorasalar chose to mention him out of all the antagonists that we got lol
But this does make sense! In a video posted by Ankama animations on YouTube, they mentioned that the antagonist for the season will be a new antagonist but someone that we already know. @geekgirles made sure to screenshot the exact moment where an employee had mentioned the antagonist of the fifth season here.
I actually really wish that Harebourg had recently been a problem for Yugo and Amalia because it would make 100% sense as to why Grougalorasalar even mentioned him in the first place.
It makes so much sense in fact THAT I MADE AN ENTIRE THEORY AS TO WHY IT'S PLAUSIBLE THAT HE'S STILL ALIVE HERE.
#if u think the pics look a bit weird then it's normal cuz i took them from another device and tried to whiten them as best as i could#the usual black and white pics are gonna come back someday#so that's good for me and maybe good for u if it bothers u too lol#wakfu#ankama#krosmoz#the great wave#wakfu the great wave#wakfu the great wave volume 2#the great wave volume 2#wakfu the great wave chapter 11#the great wave chapter 11#wakfu review#wakfu reviews#wakfu the great wave review#wakfu the great wave volume 2 review#the great wave volume 2 review#the great wave review
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i think it should be possible to scream without making any noise or disturbing anyone or inviting any questions . just sometimes . as a treat .
#hhhhHHHGHGHHHHHH#jay screams into the void#(deeply personal rant incoming feel free to ignore)#a friend of mine has just been undiagnosed with bpd which . lovely for them but it sure as fuck invites a Lot of questions#suddenly a great deal of previous shitty behaviour that was excused on the basis of bpd has a lot more to answer for#(obligatory I Know BPD Isn't An Excuse To Treat People Like Shit . im aware . i have bpd myself and i have v high standards re my behaviour)#(however allowances were made bc they were unmedicated & out of therapy through no fault of their own)#(and our whole group has enough experience with untreated mental illness to understand that it can make u a bitch sometimes)#but yeah no there have been a LOT of instances of b&w thinking + manipulation + unfair judgement + high emotion + snap reactions#and every situation Could be explained by untreated bpd and the bad times have never been prolonged or often enough to outweigh the good#but Hoo Boy if that wasn't bpd then what the FUCK was it#like either the new psychiatrist is wrong (possible but i seem to be the only one questioning it) or they're just Like That#and again . not enough to outweigh their numerous positive and loveable traits#but the whole group has been destabilised on a number of occasions due to their actions during a bad spell#and i'm really not sure Any Other Explanation is enough to justify that#ah well . this seems like the kind of thing that will eventually come up during a sleepover heart to heart#but rn i'm stuck in a bubble of MAJOR rsd & brainfuck abt it . which is unfortunate bc now is exactly the time i Don't need brainfuck#anyways ⨠goodnight tumblrinas i am . kind of hoping nobody read this bc i fear i sound like a bitch#i am genuinely happy for their undiagnosis it seems to have put many things into perspective for them & theyre v happy about it#i'm just . uncomfy w some aspects of it that i have only been halfway brave enough to discuss with them personally#That's One To Bring Up With My Therapist In A Few Weeks#Bit Of A Shame I'm No Longer In Therapy And Now Have Only 2 Quarterly Reviews Left Before I'm Discharged From The Service
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Oooh, definitely glee for the fandom asks! <3
Always with the hornets' nests with these ones, I see! Though i don't think there's a fandom out there that isn't in some way a hornets' nest once it gets large enough... hm. Alright. I'm just gonna be as honest as i can be about this, and tag accordingly.
Glee:
my favourite female character: augh. argh. ouph. so difficult. so hard. Since I'm working off of half-remembered show and half recently-rewatched show... its a tossup. Mercedes, Santana, Quinn. Probably Mercedes. She did nothing wrong ever in her entire life <3 well okay maybe except that one time she smashed kurt's car windows (but it was a banger song, though). Can't say Santana because of the Biphobia TM and other things like excessive use of bigotry-based insults, and Quinn. Oh god girl. Cheating is not cool! Funnily enough! So I find them really interesting but 'favourite' is hard to say. Mercedes. Mercedes for sure <3
my favourite male character: Blaine sam blaine sam blaine sam yes. I am imitating ripping petals off of flowers and coming to a conclusion based on which is the last name i said. So I guess that means Sam! But really this is a tie.
my favourite book/season/etc: Mannnnn idk. I don't like shows for seasons as-a-whole. Also i could not tell you what happened in any given season if you held a gun to my head. I'm not good at that. The only shows i know 'seasons' of are Buffy and Teen Wolf because i've watched them like 100000000000 times (exaggeration) for various reasons (mostly fanfiction research).
my favourite episode (if its a tv show): I can tell you my LEAST favourite episode (blame it on the alcohol, thank you Kurt king of biphobia! this is a persona foible it's not the worst episode in the show. by far. by far. it's kind of an average one. I'm just angry at it.) BUT er. Favourite? Idk. Genuinely some of the earlier Kurt-centric stuff was really well done (his convo with Burt... <3) and the Quinn giving birth accompanied by bohemian rhapsody was obviously iconic, but if I'll be honest I couldn't name any episodes of this show (other than That One previously stated, anyway). And yeah most of the time they were named after song titles and No i don't remember those song titles either. I'm just so bad at this. My memory is that of a goldfish's being haphazardly bounced around on a sieve.
my favourite cast member: it would be really funny if I said Demi Lovato [she counts!] but the truth is N/A: i don't know these people !!! They are strangers!! (i don't. follow celebrities. at all. I couldn't even name most of them. They're just people doing a job and their lives are irrelevant to me beyond their ability to perform that job well. I do not need to know where they live and what coffee they drink. Stalker shit tbh. I'm kind of a very private person myself, so rpf-adjacent stuff just... creeps me out. I've never watched a single cast interview in my lifetime and I'm not about to start!)
my favourite ship: Difficult to say! Grave and obvious lie. Blam. It's blam. Quintana is a close runner up though Santana really needs to stop dating people who cheat on the regular (I'll accept Quinn has grown enough not to do this by the time a Quintana coupling would be viable - and satisfying in terms of character arcs - narratively speaking).
a character Iâd die defending: Blaine Anderson did something wrong for sure but like Kurt did it first so shrugs. Cancels out. Bad for each other! Case closed!
a character I just canât sympathize with: genuinely don't remember if I had one of those the first time around because I was like 10 and just didn't pay attention if I didn't care, but Terri and her racist self take that 'prize' this time, alongside the obvious predator in the room [original choir teacher. Sandy? I forget his name immediately after hearing it. He doesn't deserve to be remembered]. Also JBI is just.... a yikes character all around. I mean, he's a blatant stereotype for one, in a the people who wrote this person don't like jews kind of way. Unfortunately common stereotype too, for the era, so not only is he that, he's also lazy. Just a one-note pervert who's the butt of various antisemitic 'jokes' you've heard from era-peer shows a million times over, tired and awful and a sour reminder of bigotry that continues to this day. Really regrettable character who's lack of redeeming qualities was probably purposeful. (I know Rachel and tina are also jewish, but this comes up very rarely and mostly only when santana needs to say something kind of fucked up, as is her modus operandi, for 'comic relief'. Tina's jewish-ness wasn't even canon for several seasons, because she didn't have a surname or a family or anything resembling complex character depth for several seasons. The one time I really remember Rachel's religion being important was when she was pressuring Kurt into believing in some kind of god, which??? don't do that. Bad example. Trying to guilt trip a friend into faith sucks. I take back what i said earlier Mercedes did that too. Boo. Girls try again that was a bad showing all around. Though i have no idea why Kurt went the acupuncture route as his 'secular' option but i think that has to do a lot with the writers doing literally no research ever once in their lives (you can tell they don't by the way they write the football segments of the show, which make no sense according to football fans who watch Glee, of which there are numerous because real life isn't like fiction where you can only like music or sports. Most of the kids in my school year were doing the most of everything ever if they were the 'popular' ones - we do that differently; popularity isn't really based on who know know; for some bizzare reason literally everyone knew who I was? Even people I'd never spoken to?? - but more about like... how much you can do, I guess. Overachievers, but I'm not saying that negatively; these people were generally - generally - very nice, and surprisingly chill for people who had no spare time whatsoever. I'm not entirely sure when they slept; A* across the board, at least one sport, at least one instrument, several extracurriculars, parties every weekend, dozens of friends and an s.o. . Eh? Way too much going on. Scary lifestyle! Impressive burnout rate, probably. Er. Tangent! Back to the scheduled programming).) There's uhhhh there's a lot of bad characters on the show, but i'd say Sandy and Terri and her equally but more loudly racist sister are truly completely irredeemable ones. Like they're not interesting or anything, they're just there to be narrative annoyances (which, in the case of Sandy specifically, is insane. Arrest that man!!! He has actively sexually assaulted minors!!!).
a character I grew to love: difficult to say because I tend to just make an opinion and stick to it. Also i don't remember who i liked at first and who i didn't, this show came out when i was eight. I didn't watch it until I was a little older than that, of course, but I frankly have spotty memory until my late teens, so! I'm not sure!! Quinn, probably. Pink-hair-era Quinn helped me understand her more, and seeing the moments of kindness hidden behind practical cruelty, when you understand her family and situation, makes things make a lot more sense. It takes a lot to get me to sympathise with a cheater, but I can see where Quinn was getting all turned around in her head about life because of her upbringing and socialisation, not to mention the profoundly negative impact cheerios had on her mentally and that the school's culture in general was not exactly a breeding ground for empathy and optimism.
my anti otp: can you tell (klaine). I don't dislike Kurt!!! Please let him have a fun chillaxed boyfriend in new york with his vogue friends. But also please stop attempting to control other people's diets thank you!! Thank you!! I'm of mixed feelings. Blaine and Kurt both did at least one bad, relationship-ending thing, and proved over and over again that they just weren't on the same wavelength in regards to life goals and ways of living it. They can't even share the same living space, which is kind of required for a functional marriage. I don't know, it just seems like they settled for their first proper, serious boyfriend even if that's not really the best match, and I... wish they'd just got to see more of life first, you know? They got married at like 20! Or something! I'm 23, I cannot imagine getting married at 20. That's a baby. Let them live first!
(same for Santana and Brittney, imo. I also don't really like them together because Santana and Brittney have very different ideas regarding monogamy, which is just never going to go down well in the long run. If your girl cheats on you like twenty times and tells you to your face its not cheating in her view of things, but you think it is, break up with her because you'll just make each other miserable. Brittney sort of seems incapable of feeling guilt but if she were, this kind of moral pressure would be Not Good, and obviously Santana isn't comfortable with the idea and doesn't have to be!! Just move on!!! Find other people!!!! Don't marry your first girlfriend if you've broken up like ten times this is simple!!!! Please!!!! But Klaine wins out over Brittana because - in my opinion, glee fandom please do not persecute me, I am known for this specific thing - I see... interactions that verge on abusive between Klaine that I don't see in Brittana. So. Oof? Ex; use of public perception to disguise attack; deliberately hurting Blaine in a stage-combat fencing match (you are not meant to make actual contact in these) and thus using Blaine's own dislike of making his difficulties common knowledge against him in order to 'punish' him. This is no good! Don't do this!!.[Also just to err vaguepost about a comment.... that is. not. what i would call passive aggressive. Physically attacking someone with a sword - no matter the type of sword, fencing foils hurt just as much, they're just not stab-you sharp... er, these days - is just straight-up aggressive.]).
Note that negative things stick in the mind better than positive ones; on a rewatch I may well alter my opinion!
But also I'm really, really stubborn. So it's not likely. Klaine.
#how the fuck do i tag this#glee#glee shite#ask game#anti-klaine#anti-brittana#anti-kurt#though it isn't because i do like him genuinely one of the better characters. he just... doesn't treat blaine great because they're#fundamentally incompatible romantically. and that's fine! but taking this out on each other isn't.#augh. i hate talking about controversial shit a;lksfja;slkf i used to get So Scared of anon hate mobs you have no idea#if i thought something could get that i simply would never ever not one even dare to think it. let alone say it online in a private forum#(dms with my friends) or god forbid a public post#so. this is growth!#you could say i just got a really weird form of catholic guilt about dissenting from public opinion when i was like 14. you'd also probably#be correct! As I was catholic. And all. Not very devout mind you (did not. go to church.) but still#anyways.#... there's so much i could say about brittany as a character but i'd have to rewatch to make sure i was being accurate about her.#so much that isn't exactly glowing commendation. to be clear.#augh. this show gives me so many very very mean thoughts about it. because it does things so very meanly most of the time#it handles beaste well. Coach Beaste is great. 11/10 character#but so much other stuff it gets just so wrong. just so wrong#(also i never finished the show. actually like genuinely i just missed a whole portion of it. so if they fuck up Beaste at some point I hav#not seen I'll be really really mad.)#(I found out about some of the later events-second hand. i don't 100% know how the brittana marriage goes down but i just... don't like it#as a concept. like at all. they're too young and too unstable for that shit.)#(basically; towards the end i was still watching the show on tv. so i missed whole swathes of episodes thanks to how tv works. do not miss#that headache!)#augh. i should shut up now and go to bed. midnight.)#<3 thanks for the ask! Hope i didn't say anything you disagree with too strongly...
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Me right now: "The Smitten is just like me for real."
Like???? I hope not??????
#lile god i hope he isn't??? i hope I'm not like that???#...ok i do be like that to a degree i can't lie#like haha i understand your intense need to die a great death for someone you love and your preoccupation with the chase but not the result#and your immense disregard for yourself as a person which leads you to or perhaps is the consequence of transforming into a tool#a role and an object but it's never enough is it and you'll never be enough will you? and the clock on the wall it keeps on ticking#and you repeat 'this is how it's supposed to be'. and if you look inside yourself you will see that there is no yourself to look in.#if you look inside yourself you will find a shadow in the body of someone else#like ah boy just like me you subscribe to the Folk story but there is no curtain to roll when the dragon is slain#you get the girl and what then? if you don't die then what then? maybe if you destroy yourself enough you will achieve something#maybe if you tear your chest open the curtains will fall. otherwise the only thing left is 'what am i supposed to do?'#the one thing that I pray we don't have in common is his tendency to make caricatures of people in his head#like uuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhh i hope i don't do that.#which reminds me kinda funny how people were giving him way more slack when just Dam//sel existed. like i disliked him more back then#because The Da//msel is VISCERALLY horrifying to me. cannot stress how physically nauseous the chapter makes me#which might sound ironic considering I'm the biggest pioneer of 'boooo if anyone ever gets to know the real me I'm packing my bags#and leaving. nobody is allowed to interpret me the correct way. if you know me you don't. i hope you misunderstand every word i say.'#but i see a very thick line between not understanding me and between making up an idealised smooth harmless caricature of me#that you attempt to shove me into. like. the song The Projectionist by Aurelio Voltaire is what I'm referring to#and that's horrifying to me. like ah no not again please. a few times in my life was enough.#I'd say that simply 'not understanding' is Spec//tre and TPA//TD. And those routes are depressing#but not horrifying. they're like 'haha oh god that's me. don't mind my tears.' but Dam//sel is like...genuine horror. to me.#and HA//E actually made my opinion of Smi//tten better because like no no I get him. I also get H//AE Prin//cess. like haha that's me. ow.#Like haha girl the way you are incapable of saying the words 'i want' and cannot bear to say what you feel or think because you aren't#supposed to; it isn't what you should do; you should cave in and make others happy; don't you WANT to make others happy and who#gave you the right to even want something anyway; well it reminds me of the mirror in my house
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What your favorite TWST character says about you :)
As a note before I begin: I saw one of these that shamed malleus and randomly even chenya enjoyers- (claimed that they were pick mes or something? đ) so i wanted to make one that was more positive out of spite <3 make it more about the writing and why people appreciate the characters. Take each of these with a grain of salt i spose- also a lot of them share similar themes <3
(Aka fans who have different views or even blatantly incorrect views of characters will always exist everywhere, but insulting the entirety of a group solely for enjoying a character, many for different reasons, is probably not a great idea!
I get that sometimes people suck and thats understandable, but quit generalizing ok? Ok.
From a malleus enjoyer who just thinks hes a silly little guy and im tired of feeling like i have to defend myself bc he's my blorbo đľâđŤ)
Final note: i love unapologetically taking frustration and turning it into something that can make people smile đ also i blindly wrote this from 11pm-midnight :))) dividers by @/cafekitsune!
Heartslabyul:
Riddle: you enjoy and/or relate to the idea of healing from the past. Working hard to improve oneself for the ones around you and yourself: creating a healthier environment where you can be happy
Trey: there is immense complexity in things that are seemingly mundane. Digging deeper and deeper to find something truly sweet and heart warming is your joy.
Cater: maybe you relate, or maybe you used to, or maybe parts of the connections made in the past/presence/future dont feel as deep as you truly want them to be. There is something beautiful about a desire for genuine human connection, but also peace in being alone. There is a safe space for you yet, just be patient. đ
Deuce: you love drive and determination. An endless stubbornness that keeps one going against all odds. Against every person who tells someone they cant. You watch them get proven wrong, and its pure bliss.
Ace: you find the connection between people beyond words heartwarming: even the seemingly simple ones. The ability to have a connection with someone who can get up to some mischief, tease back and forth, yet be there when you need them to be one of the most valuable things.
Savanaclaw:
Leona: Adversity over a lack of belief in oneself is a very difficult thing to overcome- yet it is very possible with the right crowd, the right amount of time, healing, and effort. You think someone's worth lies more than just within their title/job/appearance, but within the fact that they are able to stand back up and keep moving onward despite the odds. The hope for that change, and the ability to get out of bed in the morning on its own is strength.
Ruggie: Despite being through so much trauma at such a young age, recovery happens anyway. Its not perfect, at times the lessons learned are even rough. The survival tactics that once helped are now hard to ditch when theyre not needed anymore, but the ability to smile and joke and keep pushing onwards is something you value in life.
Jack: Self discipline can be both extremely useful as well as harmful in different ways. You find the way people can constantly strive to better themselves at what they love and/or morally to be highly admirable.
Octavinelle:
Azul: People can be cruel. And sometimes that cruelty inspires cruelty. Sometimes its simply used as a way to move on and survive insecurities created from it. Its hard, its a fight, but those insecurities are part of what make people beautiful. They are nothing to be ashamed of, and even the many tactics and smart ways of learning to overcome cruelness can be beautiful too.
Jade: The mind is extremely powerful. Intelligence and knowledge are not the only important things, no. Using that intel to find entertainment in the surrounding world can be exhilarating. Finding and discovering new unknowns: learning their ins and outs until they're a part of you is something you can relate to.
Floyd: speaking of fun- you love what is essentially the written version of a roller coaster. Ups and downs, ins and outs. Every single twist and turn is exhilarating and new. Every different perspective provides new insight into a multitude of different things. You are along for the ride, and you are having a lovely time.
Scarabia:
Jamil: self discovery can be very difficult after purposefully suppressing parts of one's self for a long time. Yet, the healing happens anyway (once again aha <3). People discover new parts of themselves, slowly becoming more comfortable not only with their environment, but how they react to it. The discovery is freedom, and freedom is bliss to you. New traits about oneself bloom like a flower: if not in the soil, then stubbornly in the cracks of cement. You gently take that bloom from the concrete and pot it, placing it gingerly in a beam of sunlight.
Kalim: Happiness isnt only sunshine to the one smiling, but to everyone else around them. It is delightfully infectious. However, happiness isnt a constant. You think emotions all emotions should be experienced rather than suppressed, because holding back sadness for the sake of others is a disservice to one's self. Discovering your own emotions, any range of them, is what makes people uniquely human. If anyone is holding those emotions back- hell, any part of them back, they need to be let out of the cage.
Pomefiore:
Vil: "Beauty is on the inside" is a saying thats been around for a long time, but beauty comes in so many forms. It can come from the stubborn desire to improve one's self: to be kinder, to help those around you, to be good. However it is impossible to be perfect. At times, for some, this can be crushing. People are hurt unintentionally, natural frustration can brew, the wrong actions can be taken: and thats okay. You believe whats important is to pick yourself up and keep going. To err is to be human, and that is beautiful too.
Rook: Error is beautiful. Symmetry is beautiful. Asymmetry is beautiful. A crack in the side walk is beautiful. Small things are beautiful, big things are beautiful. The nurturing of something through endless care is beautiful. The undeniable traits and hobbies of every individual that make them unique are beautiful. You find the endless optimism in finding beauty to be, in itself, beautiful.
Epel: Sometimes people will view others in ways that they wish not to be perceived as. This isnt in our control, as much as we sometimes want it to be. All you can do i be unapologetically yourself. To be you to the utmost degree. To prove those who thought otherwise to be foolish. You find this strength to find value in yourself despite others opinions admirable.
Ignihyde:
Idia: you have depression /j
Ok for real-
Life can be such a cunt. It can beat a person down, down, down and leave them vulnerable enough to fear it. To fear that beating, whenever it may next come. The anxiety of never knowing what or who will come next, or what one could lose. At times it feels more comforting to find a routine in solitude. But you know that the small things that give joy will wiggle their way in with time. The broken will meet people who love and care and find comfort in the companionship of healing, even from the little things: like a new story to read or game to play.
Ortho: You value unconditional support. Support through everything: the good, the bad, the just kind of okay. Knowing that someone can have ones back for every little thing- to be there solely because they care and wish the best for others- is something you look up to and maybe even wish to be for another.
Diasomnia:
Malleus: god damn people can be so hard to read and understand. They are so complicated: they are books you have to pay attention to from start to finish. But once you reach the end, you have a deep seated appreciation for them, and for the ones who stuck around to read your book too. Even if it was just for a fleeting moment: it is a happy moment. As painful as temporary things can be, it is also what you think can make the relationships we love and have loved so valuable.
Lilia: there can be suffering everywhere. There is war. There is famine. But there are also endless new sights to see. New discoveries to be made to help those still going through famine and war. New ways to love and understand people you never thought you'd understand. The development and positive parts of humanity, even though at times it can look bleak, are ever present to you. You love the discovery: of places and of people.
Silver: you believe that there is solace in being your own individual, regardless of who you are bound by blood to. Being shaped my experiences, friends, hardships, and new places are what make a person who they are. You value finding roots in and making your own home.
Sebek: Dedication can be a hard thing to come by, but when it does it can grab someone by the reigns. Using every waking moment to cherish that thing, learn more about it, become better at something, and strive to better ones self can be very admirable to you. But, on the other hand, it also calls for the occasional rest.
OTHER (just for ones I know well enough, sorry!)
Neige: You love kindness despite hardship. One can go through horrible things and still choose to be kind. The world could begin to end, and one could still choose to be kind, because it means everything.
Chenya: Curiosity fuels exploration. It fuels art. It fuels everything. It fuels excitement. It fuels friendships. It fuels medicine. It fuels life. Curiosity is endlessly fun, and you think that is very whimsical
Meleanor: Sacrifice for others can be tragic. Knowing what another person has given up for someone else, maybe even everything, is gut wrenching but undeniably a selfless love to you.
Crewel: There can be kindness in strictness. In teachings, there can be a parental guide. There can be someone who cares for you and undeniably wants you to succeed. They know that you can, so they push you towards it. You want this support.
Trein: Love surpasses time. When the ones we love are gone, the memories of them are still held close, with the love once given to them, we can show to others through advice and guidance that comes with time. You find comfort in that.
Crowley: People are flawed. We all know this, yet despite a persons flaws... however many there may be, there is still something hopeful and human about it. About having those flaws and persisting regardless. You may even like those flaws, and the unashamed desire to press on even with them on display.
Fellow/Ernesto: Live for yourself. This is what you desire. People are often caught up in material or monetary things. After all, we live in a world that required it to survive and even be respected. To throw away those views and simply live as you see fit: regardless as to whether you earn those things or not, is something you admire.
Rollo: Sometimes the attachment we have to those we lost can be painful. Regardless, that pain is proof that there was care and love. The things done for others, whether alive or dead, are done selflessly. Grief can fuel hatred, but it can also be caused by love. To unlearn hatred and learn to love again after the fear of loss is a natural human experience. It is a process you understand and admire those who take the time and strength needed to properly love again.
Thank you for reading <3
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sometimes i feel so bad for y'all bloggers because tumblr genuinely has some of the dumbest fucking ppl ive seen in a while đ like if u want to call out certain ppl for "lying about their success stories" u should at least understand how the law and the void works??? like wdym just because someone manifested their mom earning 5 million dollars a week they're lying?? if u think that's unrealistic...bitch that's on u, nothing is unrealistic. like why are u wasting ur time debunking other ppls success stories when u can just fucking manifest ur own đđ they really need to understand how realities work cause this shit makes them look dumb af
anyway i hope ur having a great day, just wanted to rant in ur asks cause i cant imagine putting up w these ppl
love ur blog btw <33
No one said it better!!! Love you âĽď¸
#void state#void#law of assumption#loa tumblr#loassumption#loa blog#loablr#manifestation#loa#the void state
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Uuuuuuh, an idea has just arrive on my mindđ¤ you know that boys usually tease girls they like right? Iâm really curious how Tachihara and tecchou would do it⌠(Iâm really curious for tecchouđ)
Teasing their crush
⥠pairing: Tecchou Suehiro, Tachihara Michizou, Dazai Osamu, Fyodor Dostoyevsky x fem!Reader
⥠synopsis: How do these boys tease the girl that they like (that's you!)?
⥠cw: Swearing, Jouno suffers a lot, Fyodor is toxic as always, mention of suicide, I somehow manage to bring Astarion up here?? (sorry)
note: i know i know. it's been a while, and i apologise. i just have been so so busy. right now i'm in an exhausted trance writing this and i'm certain i'll wake up tomorrow with no recollection of writing it at all. also threw in dazai and fyodor for the sillies i hope you don't miiind~ as always apologies for errors and i hope you enjoy x
Tecchou:
I cannot see him teasing you.
I'm sorry anon but I just can't see him teasing a girl he likes. He would either be generally nice to her, super awkward but still okay, or just come off as cold and aloof. He wouldn't go out of his way to tease a girl or exchange playful banter with her
If he ever tried to tease he would probably just straight up be mean and insult you or something. And then he wouldn't understand why it didn't work
(Jouno is smacking his head against the wall)
Don't worry. If he's gonna cope with his feelings for you he's gonna do it in a way that benefits you i.e. he's just going to be super obvious about it and not even try to hide it
(update: Jouno is still smacking his head against the wall. someone help him)
Like he'll just openly buy you food and presents and tell you he likes you and like hold your hand and shit?? Tecchou is no-nonsense. He wants to date you, he'll let you know.
And it's not like Tecchou's trying any 'techniques' or anything like that. There is not a THOUGHT behind those beautiful eyes; he's just following his heart <3
Tecchou might be a bit dense when it comes to such socially complicated things as courting, but he's a genuine person and wants to make you feel appreciated, and let you know he loves you. He just does it in the only ways he knows how <3
Tachihara:
The opposite of Tecchou
He's such a teaser. He likes to make jokes with and poke fun at his love interests, but sometimes might go a bit too far with it (If he does he genuinely feels super bad and apologises dw T-T)
Like he's one of those kinds of guys who you would get so caught up in the flirty banter with that you just talk for hours
If you're texting you guys are both kicking your legs and squealing in between texts lowkey, like you're secretly such lovesick dorks but you play it so cool
Some kaguya sama love is war type shit you guys have going on
And god forbid you do this in front of other people. They're probably SO uncomfortable. Like oh my god get a room already (this dot point was ghostwritten by Jouno)
As you two get more and more into it, he becomes less tease-flirty and more sweet-flirty. He genuinely compliments you instead of exchanging little jabs and backhanded teases, and it's so CUTE
He also, for some reason, gets more shy instead of less shy. He blushes, he messes with his hair- AUGH he's so cute
In all honesty no matter what way, shape or form Tachihara flirts with you, even if he's awkward and fumbles each time, he's still such a charmer that you can't help but love him anyway. some messy hair and a sweet boyish grin goes a LONG way!
Dazai:
This is what I like to call Egotistical Flirting
He will tease you by telling you how much you love him, how much other women love him, how wonderful of a guy he is and how great of a deal he's constantly offering you. Yes, the 'deal' in question is dinner and a movie double suicide
And of course you roll your eyes and chuckle, and while he pretends that he's all offended that you aren't openly falling for it, he LOVES that. He loves your affectionate sarcasm and he could milk it out of you for days if he had the time
And he doesn't even wait to even learn your name before he immediately goes full on womaniser. He would just approach you like 'Heyyy~' and it's all downhill from there.
Dazai is a man on a MISSION is what I'm saying
He will also tease you by embarrassing you. He just says the most oUT OF POCKET stuff out of nowhere in public?? He absolutely delights in seeing you get all embarrassed and having you swat at him and scold him
(He's a bit of a masochist don't question it)
Naturally, this is generally a facade to hide the fact that he is hopelessly infatuated with you, and kinda scared of commitment. He hopes you'll accept him as he is but just in case... it's easier to put up a nonchalant front.
Don't worry Dazai. you've got nothing to worry about. :)
Fyodor:
Mind games. Mind games. MIND GAMES
And not the good kind!
He will tease you with this neat little trick he uses called psychological warfare. In his experience it's 100% effective
Fyodor is a toxic little shit. He doesn't often really 'tease' so much as 'neg'. He doesn't quite care too much about your esteem as long as he's able to make you like him back.
You guys know this thing called Ascended Astarion? yeah this is basically just that but ⨠Russian â¨
All this being said he actually does feel affection and love towards you, and he DOES care. He just doesn't want you to reject him, so he'll use any trick necessary to prevent that (regardless of general ethics for the most part)
Fyodor is an all rounder. He'll tease, show genuine affection, neg, flirt, stalk, lovebomb...the whole shebang (I'm sure he asked Nikolai for tips, and I'm even more sure Nikolai had MANY)
Fyodor is just so emotionally out of touch when it comes to other people that he genuinely has no idea how to just...flirt, or even really be casual, like a normal person. It would be sad if he wasn't such a motherfucker
Honestly all of you 'I could fix him' girlies would fall hook line and sinker for this (and I'm allowed to say that because I am one of you)
In the end...man, just date Tachihara
taglist~ ⥠@gettinshiggywithit, @fyodorhatr, @flower-of-darkness, @bejeweledgirl, @kokoenjiandco, @pinkiipeachiikeen, @call-me-albie
#bsd#bungo stray dogs#bungou stray dogs#bsd fanfic#bsd fanfiction#bsd headcanons#bsd hcs#fanfic#fanfiction#headcanons#hcs#bungo stray dogs headcanons#bungo stray dogs fanfic#x reader#bsd x reader#x female reader#bsd tecchou#tecchou suehiro#tecchou x reader#bsd tachihara#tachihara michizou#tachihara x reader#bsd dazai#dazai osamu#dazai x reader#bsd fyodor#fyodor dostoyevsky#fyodor x reader
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somewhere to run | 10. austin
Pairing: sheriff!Joel x f!reader
Chapter Summary: You and Joel travel to Austin to meet with a lawyer.
Chapter Warnings: language, angst, hurt/comfort, flirting, sexual tension, emotional abuse, infidelity, some recapping of DV and SA situations but nothing new, smut (18+ MDNI), unprotected (reader previously mentions she's on bc) piv sex
WC: 6.6K
A/N: I have started a notification blog - @punkshort-notifs if you are interested in following for fic updates (but I will be keeping the tag list for this series until it is over)
Series Masterlist
One Month Later
Life carried on the way it always does. Without permission, regardless of any pain or suffering, it always remained a constant. Whether you were present or not, whether you wanted to acknowledge it or hide from it, it didn't matter, because life always carried on.
The first week was the worst. A week of what you could only describe as depression. A week of being alone. Safe, but terribly alone. Going to work helped distract you, until he came in for lunch like always and it felt like your heart was being torn in two all over again. And you could tell it hurt him, too, but you both seemed willing to withstand the pain over not seeing each other at all. Because even though it hurt, it was a reminder you were alive. A reminder that you could still care enough about somebody else, despite everything.
The second week was when you could no longer smell him in your bed. You woke up one morning, eyes barely even open as you searched around the pillowcase, then the sheets, grabbing and pulling at the fabric, desperate to seek out his scent to no avail.
The third week was when you finally didn't have to fight the urge to call or text him, even though he said you could, you knew it would just make things harder. And he must have agreed because he didn't reach out, either.
The fourth week was when you began to feel like you were finally coming out of your slump. You could go to the grocery store or pharmacy and didn't feel your heart skip a beat, you didn't scan the parking lot for his truck in the hopes of running into him. You didn't stop thinking about him, but it just hurt less. That is, until you ran into Hailey coming back from work one evening.
She was out on the sidewalk, cleaning up some garbage from the picnic tables in front of the pizzeria when you waved and caught her eye. You could immediately tell something was wrong by the pained smile she gave you.
"Hey," she said, the smile not reaching her eyes as she leaned up against her broom.
"What's going on?" you asked her. "Haven't seen you in a while."
"Yeah, I know, sorry. Work's been-" she waved in the direction of the propped open door and shook her head. "But I've been meaning to talk to you."
"Oh?"
"It's about book club," she said, dropping her gaze to the ground. "And I just want to let you know, I voted against it-"
"They don't want me back, do they?" you offered, trying to make it easier for her. She sighed and shook her head.
"It's all so stupid, I'm sorry," she said, looking up at you again. "Nikki's got all those old ladies wrapped around her finger and they're just pissed Joel dumped her for... well, y'know."
"They know we aren't together, right? I mean, I'm married..." you trailed off, not wishing to go into too much detail when you knew eventually when you went to court, all your dirty laundry would be aired.
"Yeah, they do. Still, they blame you, and it's stupid, like I said. They should be mad at Joel, it's not like it's your fault, and I swear I tried explaining that-"
"It's okay," you said, holding up your hand and giving her a sad smile. "I appreciate it, but it's fine. I have a lot coming up, anyway. I won't find that much time to read."
"But we can still hang out! Do you wanna go get drinks this weekend? Or maybe see a movie?" Hailey asked, and you could tell she genuinely felt bad.
"Yeah, either of those sound great," you said. "I'll text you and we can figure something out."
You made a hasty exit and dragged yourself up the stairs to your apartment. Even though you probably wouldn't have continued to go, the rejection still stung.
For a while, the silence was deafening. Without a TV to even distract you, leaving you with endless amounts of time to overthink, you were worried you were going insane. You lucked out recently and found a decent TV at a thrift store, so you at least had something to occupy your time, although you knew it would be short lived. In a couple days, you had an appointment to meet with a law firm in Austin. An appointment Joel had set up and offered to attend with you, and at the time, you were so desperate for anything to do with him, you agreed, but now you were wondering if that was a bad idea. Almost two hours in the car alone with Joel? No, that didn't seem like a good idea at all.
"Whadd'ya mean, you wanna drive separate?" Joel asked as you refilled his coffee. "That doesn't make any sense. Waste of gas."
"Yeah, but I was thinking of staying an extra day. Check out the city," you lied, turning your back to him so he wouldn't be able to see through you.
"Alone?"
You cringed at the word, but nodded. The little dinner bell rang in the window and your eyes jumped up just in time to see Thor put Joel's sandwich on the small shelf. You grabbed the plate and set it down in front of him, his eyes still boring into you, waiting for a better explanation.
"I think it'll just be easier," you said quietly, the words only meant for his ears. When he connected the dots, he leaned back in his chair and nodded.
"Oh," he said, gaze drifting down to his food. "That's a shame. I was lookin' forward to it."
"I'm sorry," you told him, grabbing a rag and pretending to wipe down the counter so your conversation didn't invite gossip and speculation. "So was I. That's the problem."
"And if I promise to behave myself, would you reconsider?" he teased, finally making you smile a little.
"I think you're incapable of behaving yourself, Sheriff," you replied, making him chuckle.
This was what your relationship had been reduced to: quick, flirty exchanges over coffee and turkey clubs. You supposed it was better than nothing.
"C'mon, it's just a couple hours. If you want, you can nap or listen to music," he said, picking up his sandwich and taking a bite.
"Fine," you relented, but only because once you offered taking two cars out loud, you realized how stupid it sounded.
"Pick you up at 7?" he asked around a mouth full of food.
"Sure. Do I need to prepare anything? I've never gotten this far in the process before," you told him, suddenly feeling nervous.
"Nope. Helen already sent over all the reports and once the process gets started, they'll reach out to whatever hospital you went to back in Philly to get your emergency room medical reports," he explained, and you nodded along, feeling fidgety. "I'm sure they'll do some more digging while they're at it. Reach out to his police captain and all that."
"Right," you said, biting your nail.
"One step at a time, alright?" he told you softly, picking up on your nerves. "You already did your part, now let the lawyers do theirs."
"But I'll have to testify," you reminded him, and he slowly nodded.
"Most likely, yes. You don't have to, but it'll help your case if you do."
"And he'll be there?" you asked, wringing the towel between your hands.
"Yeah, he'll be there," Joel said, watching your face fall. "But I'll be there, too. You just look at me when the time comes, don't look at him."
"Okay," you said, taking a deep breath. You knew this would be hard, but you also knew it was necessary. "And this lawyer - they can help me get a divorce?"
"Yeah," he said with a nod, and you breathed a sigh of relief.
"Okay," you said again. You forced yourself to smile even though the anxiety was already creeping up. "I can do this," you told him, trying to sound confident.
"Hell yes, you can do this," he replied. "That's my girl," he added, picking up his sandwich then pausing before taking a bite. He glanced up at you and gave you half a smirk when he noticed the look on your face at the term of endearment. "Sorry, I'll behave."
You had initially dreaded waking up so early, but after the restless night's sleep you ended up having, it turned out it didn't make much of a difference. Your appointment was at 9:30 and it took about two hours to get to Austin, so Joel arriving at 7am gave you a decent cushion in case there was traffic.
Already two cups of coffee down, you poured the rest into a travel thermos and grabbed your purse before jogging lightly down your stairs. You locked your door and turned towards the street to find Joel's truck parked right out front. Glancing around, you noticed it was fairly quiet still, which was a relief. Joel didn't have to take you to see a lawyer. His job was technically done until the trial. He was doing this for you, to give you some support and advice and it would be ideal if you could keep people from gossiping about it for as long as possible.
"Mornin'," he greeted you with a lazy smile, which perked right up when you handed him the thermos. "Oh, you're an angel, baby," he murmured, taking a sip with an appreciative groan. You took a deep breath and forced yourself to focus on your seatbelt. Less than two minutes and he already had you squirming in your seat.
The first hour of the trip actually turned out to be relatively quiet. You sat in a comfortable silence, listening to the radio while Joel hummed along and tapped the steering wheel and if you closed your eyes, you could imagine the scene just a little differently. Instead of Joel taking you to see a lawyer in Austin so you could press charges and divorce your abusive husband, you imagined you were taking a road trip together. Maybe with no destination in mind: just the two of you and the open road, stopping whenever you saw fit to explore and staying at roadside motels with stiff sheets and shag carpets, limbs tangled together as you panted into each other's mouths. No secrets. No drama. You smiled to yourself, the fantasy giving you a pleasant reminder of what you could have if you just stayed strong.
"What're you smilin' for?" he asked, and your eyes opened to look at him.
"Nothing," you said, and he clicked his tongue against his teeth. God, you missed that tongue and what it could do.
"When all this is over, do you think we can take a road trip together?" you asked him, and his eyebrows raised in surprise.
"Yeah, 'course we can," he replied, glancing over at you briefly before looking back at the road. "Where did you wanna go?"
"Doesn't matter," you said, rolling the back of your head against the seat. "Just wanna be with you," you added, softer this time. He looked over at you again, examining your face quickly before focusing back on the road.
"Me too, baby," he said, just as softly.
Joel stopped at a gas station just outside the city to fuel up and stretch your legs. After using the restroom, you wandered up and down the aisles while Joel pumped gas just outside. You were the only one in the store, aside from the sleazy cashier with greasy hair and nicotine stained teeth leering at you every time you crossed his field of vision.
You decided on a couple waters and some sugary pastries and made your way up to the front, forcing a polite smile for the cashier, whose eyes were greedily raking up and down your frame as you approached. You were wearing a modest dress with a cardigan, doing your best to look put together for your appointment, but that didn't stop the cashier's eyes from roaming.
"That all?" he asked as he began to ring you up. You nodded and hummed before glancing out the window, watching as Joel replaced the nozzle on the pump.
"$8.32," he told you, his eyes dropping to your chest as you pulled out a ten dollar bill from your wallet and handed it to him. Your fingertips tapped impatiently on the counter as he slowly counted out your change, clearly trying to prolong the interaction longer than necessary. When it appeared he was ready to hand over the money, you held your hand out, but he pulled your change back a bit and leaned forward.
"You from 'round here?"
"No, just passing through," you said, lifting your hand again, but he clenched your change in his fist.
"What's a pretty girl like you doin' out here all by yourself?" he sneered, his hand dropping below the counter to not so subtly adjust himself in his pants. You made a disgusted face and he smirked.
"She ain't alone," Joel's deep voice rang out from behind you. The cashier's eyes drifted over your shoulder and looked like he was about to make a snide comment when you felt Joel's hand around your waist. His eyes fell to Joel's belt and saw the badge and gun and the smirk he was sporting a moment ago vanished. He quickly handed you back your change and busied himself with organizing the cigarettes while Joel tugged on your waist, urging you to back towards the parking lot.
"And you wanted to drive separate," Joel teased as he led you towards his truck. He opened the passenger door and stepped back so you could get in but you paused and looked up at him. His forehead crinkled as he grinned, his eyes squinting in the sun and all you wanted to do was kiss him and never stop.
"What?" he finally asked when you didn't make a move to get into the car.
"I really want to kiss you right now," you murmured, and you watched the grin slip from his face and his eyes flick down to your mouth.
"We can't," he replied, his voice pained as his gaze continued to drift from your eyes to your lips.
"I know," you sighed. Instead, you stood on your tiptoes to press a chaste kiss on the corner of his mouth, your lips lingering a moment longer than you should have before climbing into his truck. His breathing stuttered, the feeling of your lips on his skin again sending him into a tailspin. He took a deep breath and looked up at you in the cab, putting on your seatbelt.
"Soon," he told you, giving your leg a squeeze before closing the door.
"So you mentioned you know some of these lawyers?" you asked him as he drove through downtown Austin.
"Yeah, I've dealt with this law firm a lot on some cases over the years. They're good people, as far as lawyers go," he joked before making a right hand turn. "I asked to meet with one of the women. Her name's Madeline. She's nice. Been there a real long time. Thought you'd feel more comfortable with that," he said, and you nodded.
"Thank you," you told him for maybe the twentieth time that day. You were convinced if not for Joel, you never would have made it this far. You would have had no idea where to even begin, but he knew the answers to all those questions and helped give you the confidence you so desperately needed.
Your hands began to shake and your stomach felt like it was in knots as the two of you walked up to the front doors of the impressive four-story building. Men and women streamed in and out of the doors, most dressed in suits and pencil skirts and talking on their phones hurriedly. You swallowed the lump in your throat once you got to the front of the building, but Joel held the door open for you with a reassuring smile.
"Don't be nervous, it'll be alright," he murmured as you walked up to the large receptionist desk that housed two women with headsets on, typing furiously into their computers. One looked up and caught your eye, giving you a friendly smile.
"Mornin'," Joel said, telling the young woman your name and appointment time. She glanced at her computer and nodded before looking back up at you both with another smile.
"I'll let her know you're here, you can take a seat. It shouldn't be very long," the woman said, casting Joel one more admiring glance before she turned back to her phone and dialed a number.
Joel led you over to some plush couches and chairs and you nervously picked up an old magazine. You skimmed through it, just looking for something to occupy your hands as you waited. He sat down next to you, then inched closer so he could rest his arm along the back of the couch. It felt like he was wrapping his arms around you without actually touching you, and it gave you a temporary sense of peace.
After a few minutes of listening to the receptionists answer the phones and transfer calls, you finally heard your name and Joel's. You both looked up to find a thin, middle aged woman with short, blonde hair and glasses and a kind smile waiting for you.
"Maddy," Joel said warmly, and the hairs on the back of your neck went up. He wouldn't have asked an ex-girlfriend to represent you, would he?
"Joel, long time no see," she said, giving him a kiss on the cheek before introducing herself to you and shaking your hand.
"That's usually a good thing," he reminded her as the two of you followed her down a long hallway, passing by a few empty conference rooms and closed doors that presumably lead to offices.
"Yes, very true," she agreed with a chuckle before stopping in front of her office. She extended an arm, inviting the two of you to enter first before she followed and closed the door behind her.
"How's Tracy?" Joel asked, glancing at a photo on her desk as you sat down.
"She's great. It's our ten year anniversary this summer. We're planning a cruise," she said, settling into her desk chair and shooting you a smile.
Okay, so probably not an ex.
"Alright, let's not waste any time. I know you drove a long way to get here," Madeline said, clasping her hands together on her desk and giving you another smile. She gave off a positive energy, and you could feel yourself loosening up. "I read over everything Joel sent over so I know the basics, and I am so sorry for everything you've had to endure," she said, her eyes softening. "But can you explain to me why you've never tried to come forward before? Trust me, his lawyer will bring it up."
"Well, I have tried," you began, your fingers tangling together in your lap. "I've gone to the police a handful of times but every time I thought I was making progress, Patrick would do something - call in a favor, I don't know," you said with a shrug. "And my police reports magically disappeared. I've gone to the hospital on several occasions-"
"That's right, I did read that. Which hospital?" she asked, picking up a pen, the tip hovering over a legal pad.
"There were a few different ones," you said, then rattled off the names and approximate dates you visited each hospital.
"Okay. We'll reach out and get copies of those records for the trial," she said, dropping the pen and looking at you to continue.
You went on to tell her about your experience with the police back in Philadelphia and how angry Patrick would get after those visits. You told her about his disappearances for days at a time and how he would come home in a haze, no doubt with alcohol and some type of drug in his veins, how those were the times he hurt you the most.
By the time you got to the part in your story where you packed a bag and left Philadelphia during one of Patrick's benders, you felt a lot more at ease. Your nerves were gone and Madeline's comforting gaze made it so much easier to tell her everything.
"So the next step in the process is discovery. Our team here is going to be digging up dirt back in Philly, and I am sure Patrick's lawyer is already doing the same thing," she said, putting down her pen and looking at you over her glasses. "That being said: is there anything I need to know? I don't like surprises in court. I don't care if you ever smoked weed or pushed him back, I just need to know so I can get ahead of it." You quickly shook your head.
"No, I've never tried drugs and I never hit him back." You glanced over at Joel for the first time and found him staring at you with a look in his eye that made you believe you were thinking about the same thing. After a moment, you turned back to Madeline, about to open your mouth to speak when Joel cut you off.
"There's one more thing," he said, sitting up straighter in his chair. She looked at him curiously, clearly not expecting him to have anything to add. "We, uh," he cleared his throat and glanced over at you. "We had a brief, personal relationship," he said. Madeline sat back in her chair and you could have sworn she was glaring at him. "It's over. It was just once," he continued, and you nodded quickly, trying to help him out.
"Nobody knows, either," you told her, drawing her gaze back onto you. "Patrick had his suspicions, but he also accused me of sleeping with two cooks from work, which is untrue," you clarified, "he's just jealous and angry."
"How can you be sure nobody knows?" she asked, and you paused.
"W-well, nobody..." you trailed off, looking at Joel for help.
"It's a small town, Maddy. If people knew, they'd be talkin'. Trust me," he said, rolling his eyes. "The most anyone knows is I had a little crush on her, but nothin' more."
"Besides. Patrick's cheated on me for years. I'm not an idiot, I could smell the perfume on his jacket and found the condom wrappers in his pants pocket," you told her, but she shook her head.
"This is a little different, hun," she said, leaning forward. "Joel's the town sheriff. He arrested Patrick and broke his nose. It's going to look like he had ulterior motives," she said, lifting up a piece of paper in front of her to double check her notes.
"I didn't break his nose, the table broke his nose. It was self-defense. The guy's got nothin'," Joel scoffed.
"Yeah you're probably right, but he's still going to make your life a living hell in court," Madeline said. "You looking for representation, too?"
"What?!" you exclaimed, turning in your seat to look at Joel. "He's suing you?"
"Yeah, it's no big deal. Happens from time to time, nothin' ever comes from it," he said casually.
"Why didn't you tell me?" you asked, your voice softening.
"Didn't wanna worry you. You gotta focus on this," he said, pointing to Madeline. "The other shit doesn't matter."
You wanted to argue with him but you knew your time was running short, so you let it go.
"Well at least you had the good sense not to take her statement," she said, glancing down at the papers before her. "Let's just hope it doesn't come up, and if it does, I'll be prepared," she said, making a note to herself before giving you her attention again. "I'll do my best to fast track this and set a court date. I'll have my team call his superior officer and we'll run some checks on him, call the hospitals, and start building your case. I'll be in touch soon about any potential witnesses you can bring to the stand that you trust. Anybody who might have witnessed Patrick abusing you, even if he was just yelling or twisting your arm. People you confided in. Anybody you might think can help, start thinking about it now and gathering contact info, okay?"
"Okay," you said firmly. You were starting to feel better, like this was the beginning of the end. And you had the feeling that Madeline was the right person to fight for you. She seemed honest and straight forward, understanding yet tough. This was someone who would give you your freedom back.
"And I can get a divorce?" you asked, and she nodded.
"Yes, I'm going to file the petition this afternoon and he will be served the papers," she explained. "If he contests it, we can cross that bridge when we come to it, but I'm hoping with all the fire we're throwing at him, he won't want to put up a fight."
"Thank you," you breathed, feeling even more at ease now that something was actually happening today. Any amount of progress at this point made you feel good.
You stayed another hour to review an endless amount of paperwork: the contract with the law firm, reviewing your statement for any inaccuracies, initialing and dating next to so many paragraphs on the petition to be filed that your eyes were going blurry by the end.
As you both stood up to follow Madeline out of her office, you stopped short.
"Wait, what about payment? I don't think we discussed legal fees in the contract," you said, frowning as you pulled your copy of the contract out from under your arm.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I thought Joel already told you," she said, glancing over at Joel, who dropped his gaze to his shoes. "The partners picked your case pro bono. The firm has to do a certain number each year and Joel suggested to a few of the right people that your case should be considered."
Your eyes widened and your jaw dropped.
"Are you kidding me?" you whispered in shock, trying to fight the tears that were beginning to spring up. You looked at Joel but he averted his gaze before awkwardly clearing his throat.
"It's no big deal-" he began, but you cut him off.
"No, it is a big deal," you told him, and he clamped his mouth shut. Madeline's eyes flicked between the two of you for a moment, watching as you tried and failed to come up with the right words to convey your gratitude.
"The firm is happy to represent you, hun," Madeline said, breaking the silence. "We're gonna make sure this guy gets what's coming to him, understand?"
You tore your eyes away from Joel, who was finding it difficult to look anywhere but the floor.
"Thank you. Thank you so much," you told her, and she smiled before extending her arm towards the door.
As you walked towards the lobby, she was reminding you to expect a call in a few days with an update and to have a list of contacts ready for her, but you just nodded along numbly, barely listening.
Joel had already gone above and beyond by finding you a good lawyer and coming with you for support, but to also convince them to handle your legal fees? He didn't have to do any of this, but he did, and he didn't expect anything in return. Nobody had ever expressed so much concern about you before. And as you walked in silence towards the parking garage, you realized there could only be one explanation. There could only be one reason why he would do so much, and the thought had your heart pounding in your chest.
You drove in silence for a while, the atmosphere in the truck tense. He tried putting music on but you couldn't focus on anything other than everything that happened in the past few hours. Then you started to go back even further: cleaning your apartment and finding you furniture after Patrick vandalized it, walking you home during a rain storm, fixing your fucking sink when you had barely spoken two sentences to him. You rolled your head to the side, watching him as he focused on the freeway, his grip tight around the steering wheel.
"Look at me," you said quietly, and you saw a muscle in his jaw twitch. After too long of a pause, he just said one word.
"Can't."
"Why not?"
"I'm drivin'."
"Bullshit," you said, and watched his throat bob as he swallowed nervously. You continued to stare him down, willing him to look at you, needing to see into his eyes to confirm your suspicion.
"Please, Joel," you finally said, your voice small. You could see the conflict in his face. The way his lips formed a hard line and his brows pinched together as he fought the urge, but once again he found he couldn't say no.
Slowly, he pulled his gaze off the road and forced himself to look at you. Your lips parted as you looked right through him and he knew right then and there he was fucked.
"Pull over," you mumbled, and he just nodded. He could feel the heat of your gaze on him as he took the nearest exit and pulled into a parking lot of what appeared to be an abandoned department store.
He didn't need to ask and you didn't bother to explain.
Once he parked, doing his best to choose a secluded spot, you each ripped off your seatbelts. He reached down to pull the lever below his seat and slid it back as far as it would go and in broad daylight, you climbed over the console to straddle his lap. His hands flew to your hips as you gripped the sides of his face, searching his eyes frantically before your mouth crashed down over his with a moan.
Joel was normally a strong man, but something about you always made him so weak. Weak and selfish and desperate and he wouldn't have it any other way. That's why, even though he knew it was a mistake, he kissed you back. Your tongues tangled together and when your hands slid up to his hair, he was done for. You were too warm and tasted too sweet and felt too fucking good, it was a miracle he came to his senses when your hand dropped down between you to land on his belt and he managed to pull away.
"That's not why I did all this," he said, each of you panting for air. "I didn't do it so I could fuck you."
"I know," you assured him, cupping the back of his neck. "I know why you did it."
He gazed up at you and slowly nodded.
"Reckon it's pretty obvious, huh?" he said softly, toying with the hem of your dress.
You didn't say anything in return. Instead, you lowered your mouth hungrily over his and he happily obliged. And when your hand drifted back down to his belt, he didn't stop you. He couldn't deny it any longer. He tried, he really did, but it was hopeless.
He wouldn't say the words out loud, and you were grateful. Because if he had, you weren't sure you would be able to convince yourself this was a one-time thing. Madeline's disapproving glare was seared into the back of your mind, her comments about Joel's own lawsuit still very much a concern, but when you lowered yourself onto him, each of you groaning your need into each other's mouths as you stretched around him, it all became a distant memory.
"Missed you so much," you mumbled against his skin as your mouth dragged down his jaw. You rolled your hips, slowly at first, but picked up the pace when you remembered you were in the middle of a parking lot and didn't have much time. "You feel so good," you continued, feeling his arms tense around you as he tried to hold himself back. "Think about you all the time. Especially in bed - ah!" you cried out when he began bucking up into you.
"Yeah? You touch yourself when you think about me?" he grunted in your ear, and your eyes rolled to the back of your head as you nodded. His hands gripped your waist, guiding your movements up and down while his mouth ghosted over your chest, wishing more than ever he could glide his tongue over your nipples, but he was too aware of where you were. He settled for yanking the sleeve of your dress down, exposing your shoulder so his teeth and facial hair could leave little red marks, hidden from view.
"Can't get enough of you, can't fuckin' stay away," he groaned, watching as you circled your hips, greedily chasing your own pleasure. Your arm shot out to the side, seeking leverage against the now foggy window, your fingers leaving telltale streaks as your hand slowly dragged downwards so when he got into his truck the next morning, he would see the ghost of your hand in the early morning dew.
"Joel," you whined, tossing your head back while you began to bounce, your ass accidentally beeping the horn and making you both laugh. Nothing could harm you here. Not when you had each other. Not when you had the feel of his rough hands over your skin and his soft lips against your mouth.
"You're so beautiful," he murmured, his arms wrapped around you, holding you close. "C'mon, baby. Want you to feel me tomorrow," he said, lifting his hips up to meet yours, bringing you closer and closer to the edge.
You gasped as your body went rigid, a white hot heat ripping through you while your legs began to shake and you whimpered his name over and over. You heard Joel groan and say something, probably a warning he was close, but you couldn't be sure. You nodded and mumbled some encouragement but your mind was still too fuzzy and your ears were practically ringing from the force of your orgasm. But when his teeth sunk into your shoulder, the slight pain snapped you out of it. His arms wrapped tightly around your waist, pulling you down firmly onto his lap until his body stilled and he grunted into your skin.
You rested your cheek on the top of his head while his face stayed buried in your chest, both of you fighting for air as reality slowly began to sink in.
"Guess I didn't behave myself," he finally said with a chuckle. You grinned and lazily raised your head up so you could look at him.
"I think I'll take the blame for this one," you said before lifting off of him with a little gasp and moving your underwear back in place. You were about to swing your leg back over to your seat when he stopped you.
"Just another minute," he said, his hands mindlessly sliding up and down your thighs, and you draped your arms around his neck.
"We shouldn't do this again," you finally said, breaking the spell. He sighed and nodded but his hands continued to glide up and down your legs.
"I know."
You cupped his face and tilted his chin up to look at you. Your thumbs brushed over his cheeks as you stared into his eyes, still seeing everything he didn't have the courage to say. Leaning down, you pressed a tender kiss against his lips, then rested your foreheads together.
"Thank you, Joel."
"You're welcome, baby."
As promised, a few days later, Madeline's secretary reached out for a list of contacts that could be called upon to support your case. You didn't have many people in your corner, but you gave her your cousin's information back in Philadelphia, an old co-worker who you had partially confided in when the abuse started, a few friends who had noticed bruises but you had made up excuses for them at the time, and you reluctantly gave your mother's information, with the note to discuss with you first before contacting her.
You had hoped Madeline wouldn't want to call on your mother to testify. You hadn't spoken to her since you ran away to Texas, and given the way she responded when you told her what Patrick was doing, you weren't confident she would be a good witness. But it was still someone from your past who you confided in, and that was what Madeline was looking for: a trail of evidence, cries for help, anything to prove the most recent incident was not a one off situation.
"Madeline called me today," you told Joel after picking up his empty plate.
"Oh, yeah?" he asked, wiping his mouth with a napkin.
"She reviewed all the contacts I gave to her secretary and she scheduled another appointment for next week."
"Great, what day?" he asked, pulling out his phone.
"Tuesday," you said, replacing his coffee with a glass of ice water. He glanced up at you and quirked an eyebrow. "You drink too much caffeine," you explained, and he grinned.
"Ah, shit. I have a thing at Sarah's school that day. Lemme see if I can reschedule it-"
"No, go to Sarah's school, I wasn't telling you so you would come with me, I was just... letting you know," you said with a shrug.
"You sure?" he questioned, and you nodded.
"I'm sure. I know how to get there now and I feel comfortable with Madeline. I swear, I'll be fine," you told him. He put his phone down on the counter and thought for a moment before leaning forward and lowering his voice.
"This ain't 'bout what happened last time, is it?"
"No!" you said in surprise, and he looked relieved. "Not at all. I'm just trying to... I don't know, take control of my life, I guess?" He nodded but he still looked confused. "What I mean is, I think it's important I do some things for myself. Not that I don't appreciate-"
"I get it," he said with a chuckle as he stood up from his stool. "You just let me know if you change your mind."
"Okay," you replied with a smile, but stopped him when you realized he hadn't touched his water. You held the glass out to him and he stared at it, then looked at you with a sigh before plucking it from your grip and downing the whole thing in one gulp.
"Happy?"
"Very," you said with a grin, and watched him as he walked towards the front door, stopping briefly to chat with Maria before heading back to work.
Joel shoved his hands into the pockets of his dress pants as he walked back to the station, nodding to a few people along the way. He couldn't stop his gaze from traveling up to the window above the pizza place every time he walked by, smiling to himself when he noticed a new plant in your window.
The bullpen sounded quiet as Joel made his way back to his office. He liked quiet days. That was always a good day, in his book. He sat down in his chair with a huff, the little orange light on his desk phone blinking angrily at him, indicating a voicemail. He picked up the phone and punched in his passcode. He was reaching for a pen when the voice on the other end of the phone made him freeze.
"Joel, it's Maddy. Give me a call back when you get this, it's urgent."
Taglist: @harriedandharassed@merz-8@sarap-77@nandan11@anoverwhelmingdin@fandomscollide@survivingandenduring@honeyedmiller@pedropascalsbbg@southernbe@pedrosfanny@gobaaby-blog-blog @eloquentdreamer @yomiyasxx @mrsparknuts@missladym1981@spacedoutdaydreamer @cosmic006533-blog @prettyinpunk85@maried01 @sunnyskyapplepie @sawymredfox@gobaaby-blog-blog@stevie75@mxtokko@sleepylunarwolf@lizzie-cakes@laurrrra@annieispunk@here4thedilfs @navystandardheatingoilcap @slugz-writes-shit@devilbat@ashleyfilm@scp116@tragerlover@iveseenstrangerthings50 @yvonneeeee @brittmb115@lulawantmula@abbysgirlll@ro-nahime-things@whxtedreams@ashhlsstuff@little-pookie@serenadingtigers@paleidiot@ashy-kit@lizlil@detectivejuliuspepperwood@buckyispunk @fckinel @sarahhxx03 @krispeenuggiez @flippittygibbitts@picketniffler@pedroslittlelady
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#joel miller#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller fic#joel the last of us#joel miller smut#joel miller x f!reader#joel miller series#joel miller angst#joel miller fluff#joel miller x reader#pedro pascal characters fanfiction#pedro pascal#the last of us hbo#the last of us fanfiction#the last of us#sheriff!joel#waitress reader#STR fic
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a cute idea just popped in my head!! imagine other bikers give simon an upside down peace sign (meaning ride safe/keep both wheelson the fround hehe) when his s/o with him. and she just waves her hand to others <3 they're the cutest couple đĽš
i definitely need a biker boyfriend in my life, yeah... that was all and now im going!! have a great day/night bestie <33 âď¸đ
IM SORRY FOR JUST REPLYING TO THIS RN BUT AHHHH OH MY GOD THAT IS SO ADORABLE IM GONNA CHOKE!! thank u sm for sharing this omg ^3^
this ones short n told from outsiderâs pov teehee <33
biker!simon mlist / star divider by @/plutism
ajaxâs head turns when he hears the short honk from logan, the other whirling past the speeding sedan to trail beside ajaxâs bike. he watches as logan brings his hand up, two fingers jutted out, and makes a pointing motion somewhere in front.
ajax follows loganâs signal, sitting up on his bike to see past the hoods of the cars, before catching sight of the infamous âghost riderâ â a funny name given that the bike doesnât remotely look like the harley that was used in the film, but one that stuck anyways. it was dubbed by a fan after seeing ghost in his first ever rally and ghost, with his sleek black skull mask and extra flare, took upon the name with pride.
but thatâs not what logan was pointing at, ajaxâs sure, because perched behind ghostâs bulk is a smaller figure, one whom ajax remembers hearing about â ghostâs darling girl. the manâs other half even when theyâre polars of each other; sun and moon, or however else the two are described.
ajax isnât really sure who started the rumour that the two are opposites because last time they all met, simon and his girl were equally⌠grossly in love.
finishing each otherâs sentences, actions matching up even when theyâre not looking at each other, defending each otherâs honours type of grossly in love.
simon pulling his girlâs chair towards him because â and ajax thanks the othermanâs tact â it would have been too much if he just plucked her from her seat and plopped her on his lap type of grossly in love.
but ajax understands why â youâre simply such a beautiful person.
ajaxâs not a shy guy â heâs sure shyness naturally gets replaced the moment one begins trusting themselves with their lives as they take on a bike â but there he had been, stuttering when talking to you. you had asked him how he knew of ghost and ajax swears it was like he almost forgot anything about himself. even how to ride a bike.
but you were so genuine with your interest in getting to know him that he felt so relaxed being around you; stutters getting replaced by the sureness in his voice, previous embarrassment getting trampled and replaced with comfort. ajax left that night feeling like heâs just been adopted as your older brother, lack of blood relations be damned.
loganâs light honking snaps ajax from his thoughts again and he turns to his friend, sending him a nod, before the two are revving their bikes to catch up to ghost rider.
when the two are close, logan splits from ajax until theyâre flanking ghost on either side. itâs ajax who presses his horn button to catch ghostâs attention.
itâs laughably endearing how both you and ghost whirl your heads to turn to ajax, and while ajax canât see ghostâs expression heâs blessed to see the way your glare melts away the moment you make eye contact with him.
one of your arm untangles from ghostâs waist to offer ajax an excitable wave. ajax raises his hand and points two fingers to the ground â ride safe! â hoping that you understand what it means, let alone know that it means anything.
ajaxâs eyes flit towards ghostâs head and even though the other man is all visored up, ajax sees him nod back before returning the gesture.
logan honks on the other side of the pair and ajax watches as the interaction was mimicked. you give logan a happy wave as well and logan, the bastard, replies with a flying kiss.
ajax laughs when ghost flips logan off.
OH HOW ADORABLE THIS CONCEPT IS IM ACTUALLY SCREAMING AND KICKING MY FEET!! hope u liked this <33
adding more characters in this fun lore teehee >:)
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Hi! There are role swap AUs of them already and I love them so much, so I tried making my own too! You should know that this is entirely self-indulgent like anything else I draw askdaslds
There is Mareach and Bowuigi bc yes alskdklasd and a tiny bit of one-sided Luaisy that leads to nothing because Luigi's a married man đ
I had other drawings of them, but they're not colored yet and I wanted to share the idea already sjsjs
Here's some ideas for this AU!
-Mario's the Mushroom Kingdom Princess and his parents are the King and Queen. Luigi used to be the other princess, green princess or green princess Mario (as in, his bro Mario, not his last name Mario đ), but he married Bowser and became the Queen of the Darklands :y Everyone in there respects and remembers his name, he's built a really good reputation for himself by simply being himself, in this house we believe in the 'Luigi is the Darklands' hero' hc too. Their aunt and uncles (and cousin) rule Sarasaland.
-(King boo's a Darklands ally but still hates Queen Luigi from that one time he wiped clean his mansion when the king kidnapped Mario. Luigi's scared of ghosts still too, but Junior always reassures him he's gonna beat them up if they try scaring his mama (I drew it actually, I'm gonna color it too!))
-When the bros were 20 Bowser at first tried kidnapping Princess Mario, and Mario was ready to beat his ass but they ended up talking about ally-making and ruling a kingdom as Bowser just got crowned king. Mario advised him to listen to his advisor and other stuff and by the time Luigi caught the koopa ship, ready to bonk Bowser in the head with his comically large hammer, the princess and king made plans of starting a treaty.
>Anyways, they met often after that when Bowser went to plan the treat with the Mario King and Queen. Luigi fell for Bowser and Bowser fell harder and Mario regretted talking to Bowser and should have instead just beat him up. He's happy for his bro though. When they married and had Junior and adopted the koopalings he decided that he was very happy that he talked to Bowser. He loves how happy Luigi is.
-Princess Mario accomplishes many things and excels at almost anything he tries, and all the toads treat him as a hero as well as a princess and all, so his dad doesn't think he's a failure, but still bothers him by urging him to get married ever since he turned thirty. He often compares him to Luigi, who got married at 23 and in the present had eight kids with his husband. Mario doesn't give a shit about marrying soon, but wished his dad would stop being annoying. His mamma is a sweetheart as always and often tells her husband to leave him alone. King Mario is stubborn as hell though (his two boys got that from him), so he doesn't.
-Peach and Daisy are cousins and they were trying to start a business together, though they weren't still sure about what (you know as Princess Peach and Daisy have many businesses together in canon aksdla), but before they could settle anything they somehow fell in the pipe and Peach landed in the Mushroom Kingdom and Daisy in the Darklands.
-Bowser still steals the Super Star, but in hopes of giving Luigi the coolest anniversary gift ever, as it's their seventh and all that. He very often gives him all sort of things, like great statues, many many dresses and all the stuff that he knows Luigi loves. Being the himbo he is, he's genuinely concerned that Luigi wouldn't like something unless it is completely new and has never been gifted to him at all. Of course, Luigi would love anything he'd give him, because Bowser's gifts are always made with love. By the end of the things, Luigi tells Bowser so and calls him an idiot affectionally, and also makes him return the Super Star. (movie-like, you know, since this is somehow a retelling alksdlasd)
-Based on what I read at discord, if you're who wrote it, pls know that i love your ideas jsjs- Bowser has set up many statues of Luigi that are of a nice stone color and has gems in its eyes to glow under the lava and the sun when it's out. Imagine that one Luigi render where he's got an arm raised and the other nicely by his side and he's smiling, that's the main statue of Queen Luigi sjjds. They contrast greatly against Bowser's, that were made to make his fierceness stand out, unlike Luigi's that highlight his kindness.
-In the piano scene, Bowser is playing and singing and Luigi's laying on his stomach over the piano's surface (no idea if that's possible but humor me alkdalsd) and listens with the most besotted expression ever, resting his face on his palms. When Kamek interrupts them Luigi's not mad or anything, but Bowser really glares at the magikoopa.
-Junior finds Daisy and brings her to the castle, in hopes that his mama and papa will help her, because they're the greatest people in the whole world and they can do anything.
-Daisy and Luigi quickly become friends, making Bowser jealous of the other human, especially because Daisy from time to time looks at Luigi as if she like-liked him. Not that he thought Luigi had eyes for anyone else beside him, but it was still annoying. And Diasy, for all she annoyed him, seemed to fully respect that Luigi was happily married.
-Daisy teases Bowser mercilessly too, at first clueless that she's supposed to be terrified and respect this guy like everyone else does (maybe Junior takes her to him first, and completely forgetting Junior's initial rambling about his family, she doesn't realize Bowser's the king, but when she meets Luigi, she sees his crown and fancy clothes and immediately knows she gotta be respectful to this guy. She doesn't know how royals are in this lava world, after all), but she keeps doing it, knowing the koopa king may look terrifying but he's mostly bark and no bite.
-DK and Mario are friends and they often meet up to beat the shit out of the other, or sparring as it's called, I think. The first time they did it, Mario got the cat power up and destroyed DK in front of the kong king and other kongs, and since then Cranky doesn't dislike Mario so much, and the others respect him greatly too.
-Mareach,,, they look at eachother and sparkles are in there too. Peach doesn't brutally throw Mario to the ground or anything, but he loses his breath anyways because of her beauty. Also, Mario's type is beautiful tall women (and tall idiot men, maybe his dad suggests DK as a husband and Mario's like ew dad, we're just friends. Or maybe... Donkareach... I like the fics that has them, but idk for this).
-Toad as a wingman, he doesn't care how obvious he is, he's gonna make Princess Mario and his new friend Peach be together, because they clearly like-like the other.
That's all I got for now askdalsd thanks if you read my ramblings, sorry if there's mistakes in writing.
I'm gonna color the stuff I got left and maybe draw more, but knowing myself I dunno if I will anytime soon đ Also I go back to college the next week sadly sjsjd
Got any thoughts on the AU? Tell cuz I'd love to know c:< but only if it's nice thoughts, I'm sensitive akdalsd
#super mario bros#my art#mario mario#princess peach#princess daisy#luigi#bowser#bowser jr#bowuigi#mareach#AU#roleswap au#also the Mareach preg post is gonna take me longer than expected bc I really wanna color it all alsdkasd#sorry pipol#princess Mario is the first ever he/him princess#princess Luigi was the second#princess mario and peach marry and they become queen mario and king peach idc
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Hope youâre doing great!! Iâm obsessed with your writing. What do you think Bully!Tsukishima would act if someone else tries to bully his crybaby?
~ Anon âď¸
i'm good thank you!! i hope you're well too! i hope you enjoy how bully tsukki reacts <3
it never even crossed his mind that someone else might try and bully you and if it did it was fleetingly and on occasions when he heard someone laugh at something he did to you, the thought didn't bother him. in his eyes it doesn't matter, if someone did start teasing you then that's your problem, it doesn't affect him.
although it really does.
when it actually does happen properly and he realises someone is genuinely bothering you it then becomes a reality and he has to deal with it.
you never hid that someone else was upsetting you and teasing you, tsukishima would never care about it anyway. coincidentally he found you one day taking deep breaths and sniffling as you're trying to breathe correctly after being tormented by someone who has started bullying you and they were crueller than anyone you've ever met before.
tsukki never thought he'd see the day where he would see you cry and not take some amount of pleasure in it but seeing you desperately try to calm down from something he didn't know about filled him with serious dread. something he has never felt so strongly before.
he crouches down to your level to where you were sitting and you jump not realising he was there in the first place. he frowns and tilts your head up so he can look at you and wipe the tears off of your face with his thumb but the tears just keep coming. "talk to me princess," he says gruffly.
you shake your head vehemently.
tsukishima clenches his jaw at what he believes is your ridiculous behaviour. "don't be a baby, talk to me."
"you won't care," you reply quietly.
"won't care about what?" if you were anyone else he'd likely have lost interest in trying to help someone so stubborn by now but you're you. if people don't want to accept his help and keep refusing to cooperate with him the majority of the time he stops trying to help, the only real exemptions are his brother and yamaguchi but even they know better than to test tsukishima's patience on this kind of thing.
"someone's being mean to me," you say while trying to stop crying.
tsukishima scoffs. "so what?" he pauses for a second before continuing, "is this why you're in here hiding away? so what if someone is being mean taking away your pen and you cry your eyes out."
you shake your head again but meekly this time, "they're being really mean tsukishima." he doesn't say anything and just looks at you. because of his gaze on you you feel his scrutiny so you come clean completely and tell him, "they're bullying me."
tsukishima just goes completely still because no one else can treat you like that. no one else can make you cry, at least not over something so serious, not over something that really upsets and affects you. not if that person or persons are bullying you. you're his, only he is allowed to do that to you. no one should make you cry. he can accept you crying if you thought someone looked at you funny or took a belonging of yours or teased you a little because you cry all the time, but this? he's not having this.
he wets his lips and looks up, taking a deep breath and trying to stop his anger from rising to the top. he's not an angry person, no one ever would assume he was an angry person and they'd be right, he's not and he never thought he would be but the idea of someone bullying you, the idea that someone is being really mean to you, that pisses him off because its not like before when he thought you where overreacting like the crybaby you are about someone mildly teasing you on one occasion, this is serious. "who?"
"does it really matter?" you fiddle with your fingers, finally calming down a bit and having less tears flowing down your chubby cheeks.
"yes, it matters."
you tell him their name and tsukishima notes it to memory.
tsukishima kisses your forehead and lifts you up, resisting the urge to kneed your soft wide hips as you stand up. "come on, lets get you something to eat and drink." it's extremely rare that tsukishima ever is seen with you in public alone but he takes you to a vending machine outside in campus.
you think he did this because it's quieter out here so there's less people and less people to recognise the two of you together but in actuality it was the closet place from where you were and he wanted you to drink something as soon as possible with how much you were crying. he's never seen you cry that much and that's saying something, the man who gets off on seeing you and making you cry not ever able to make you cry as you just have been... (yet)
that person never bothers you again. not once. why? you don't know but you're guessing tsukishima had something to do with it.
the thing with tsukishima is that he is actually very popular and is friends with people that are also popular so one bad word about someone spreads like wildfire. there are so many rumours about him in just one day it's crazy, that's when tsukishima decides to have his own private conversation with them. "your social life is a wreck your club is thinking about kicking you off the team because of all those allegations. they might be fake but really who would they believe out of the two of us? you bother my girl again, i'll make it worse. if you even talk to her or look at her i'll make sure these rumours follow you for the rest of your life."
no one talks to your bully any more but tsukishima kept his promise to not make even more extreme rumours. after he was kicked off his basketball team he was content. he'd never done anything like this before because it's not like him at all it's not in his character. so he doubts he'll ever do it again... that is unless someone else tries to bully you. they need to learn their place after all. don't touch things that aren't yours to touch.
#tsukishima x reader#tsukishima x chubby reader#tsukishima x reader smut#tsukishima smut#kei tsukishima#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu x chubby reader#bully tsukki -p6 <33#haikyuu x reader smut#hq x reader smut#hq x chubby reader#⥠mine / writing#⥠tsukki#âď¸ anon#hq smut#haikyuu smut#tsukishima x chubby reader smut#hq tsukishima#⥠lana's letters
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episode eight: the upside down
You know you shouldnât, but you laugh. Honestly, after everything youâve been through tonight with Steve, how can he possibly think the two of you arenât friends? âWhy are you laughing?â Steve mumbles, confused. âSorry,â you wheeze out, still uncontrollably laughing. âItâs justâI mean, dude! We almost died together, of course weâre friends now!â âWe are?â He looks like a little kid on Christmas day being given the gift heâs always wanted. Your heart warms. âYes, idiot.â
Summary: drinking game time ! take a shot every time jonathan tries ditching you or every time you almost die at the byers house, you find out that steve really is an athlete and tbh it's hot, but you know what's even hotter ? saving hawkins and reaching a tentative compromise with steve after he loans you $5 for snacks. after, jonathan makes a promise you really hope he can keep.
Rating: general, cursing and slight scary violence
Warnings: violence, use of fire and weapons, guns, use of fem!reader and use of y/n, slight mentions of blood and death
Words: 13.7k
Before you swing in: the final chapter ,,, my heart </3 please enjoy my child, i put so much into this chapter. action scenes scare me, they're hard and i'm weak, so i hope this lives up to everything you guys wanted n more ;) i cannot believe we're at the end (but i do have another chapter planned that's set in season 1, so shhhh). thank you so so so much for all your support. i never thought this silly lil fic would get that much attention, but i'm insanely flattered and grateful for each and every one of y'all. i'm so proud of what i've created and you guys are my beloveds ,,, anyways, enjoy !!!
-
You almost miss Jonathan and Nancy sneaking off.Â
You had been explaining a comic book that had been in your bag to El when you noticed a shift in your periphery. Turning your head, you see Jonathan stand, offer Nancy his hand to help her up, and then walk towards the main doors together.Â
What the fuck.Â
âThey wouldnât dareâŚâ You excuse yourself and run out the gym and into the hallway to follow them, absolutely furious. Youâre so sick of their bullshit, of Jonathanâs bullshit and putting Nancy first. This isnât even a petty jealousy thing, this is about the years of friendship between the two of you that has just suddenly disappeared within a damn week all due to circumstances completely out of your control.Â
The slam of the main door is the only warning Jonathan gets before youâre yanking him by his coat and flinging him back, forcing him to look at you. âWhere the fuck do you think youâre going?â
Youâve never, ever yelled at him like this before. Not even earlier this week when heâd given you that bullshit apology after screaming at you for being in his room, for saying the two of you werenât family. You didnât yell at him for hiding Nancyâs pictures from you, for going off without you to find the monster. Despite everything, youâve never been this cruel to him, even if he may have deserved it at times.
Jonathanâs wide eyes stare down at your hand thatâs still clutched around his coat, frightened. âBug, we were justââ
âJust what? Sneaking off without me?â
âItâs not like that, Y/N.â Nancy now steps in, her hands held up as if youâre some rabid dog she wants to calm down. âWe just figured weâd help Joyce and Hopper.â
ââWeâ? Are you fucking kidding me? You two talked about this, had an entire conversation, and still somehow came to the conclusion that ditching me was a great fucking idea?â You scoff, deeply hurt by the fact that the two of them had an entire conversation without thinking to include you in it.Â
âBug, can we talk about this one on one?â Jonathan asks, his voice lowered. You can see the genuine upset in his eyes and for a moment your grip on him lessens, but then you see Nancy behind him and your anger only returns.Â
âNo, we can discuss this right here.âÂ
He sighs and tries to grab the hand not clutching his coat, but you slap it away. âBugââ
âYouâve lost that privilege.âÂ
âBugâI mean, Y/N,â His voice falters. âLook, my mom and Hopper are out there right now trying to find Will while that monster is still out. Nance and I⌠We want to finish what we started.âÂ
âWithout me?â You donât mean for it to happen, but your voice catches at the end.
Jonathanâs gaze softens and this time he succeeds in grabbing your hand. You let go of him and allow him to pull you in, weak against him as always. âIâm doing this to protect them, to protect you, Y/N. Iâm always trying to protect you. You know that, right?â
You used to think that you did, but now? Youâre not so sure, and it terrifies you.Â
Nancy has stepped away from the conversation, now kicking at rocks while youâre with Jonathan, and you canât help but think about how wrong all of this feels.Â
Throughout this entire week itâs felt like someone has given you a photo of Jonathan, smeared its lines and edges, removed his moles and his crooked smile and made it neater, altered so that if you squint you can see the boy you grew up with underneath it all⌠But itâs fuzzy, almost too unclear to really see.Â
Now heâs standing in front of you, his smile once more crooked and cunning and his moles faded underneath the moonlight and for a second you can see him. There he is, clear and untouched and him in a way thatâs never quite been yours.
âI know,â you tell him. âBut how many more times do you expect me to forgive you for lying and ditching me? If you want to protect me, you need to talk to me.â
Jonathan winces. âI know, I know it sounds stupid and I know Iâve fucked up more than enough this week, I just get caught up in wanting to make sure youâre safe. Itâd kill me if I let anything happen to you⌠I just, I canât lose you, bug.â
âSo pushing me away is your grand plan of keeping me?â
âIâve always been an idiot.â He manages a smile, and you canât help but laugh.Â
âThatâs true, but if you attempt to ditch me one more time I swear to god Iâll pour tar all over your car.â
The boy laughs and for a brief moment everything feels okay again, but it doesnât last very long. âIn our defense, we figured youâd be better off with the kids since youâre not really a fighter, ya know?âÂ
You drop his hand. âExcuse me?âÂ
Jonathanâs smile is gone. âWhat?â
âIâm not really a fighter? Youâre kidding, right?â
âHey, no I didnât mean it like thatââ Jonathan fumbles over his words, clearly taken aback by your sudden mood change.Â
You step away from him. âHow many times did I defend you against Lonnie? Better yet, remind me how we became friends in the first place. Wasnât it because I threw milk at a bunch of idiots bullying you? Huh?â
âY/Nââ
âGod, I canât believe I almost let you get away with it again! I mean, do you even hear the bullshit that comes out of your mouth?â You deepen your voice, now doing a poor impersonation of him. ââHey, bug! You know I love you, right? Cool! Now, Iâm gonna go do fuck all and ignore you and ditch you and then somehow turn it into me being a good guy because duh! I can never do any wrong!ââ
âPlease, justââ
âDid I get it right? It was a pretty good impersonation in my opinion. I mean, I am the one who has had to deal with this shit all fucking week. I think I'm an expert on this topic now.âÂ
Jonathan looks pained but you donât fucking care anymore. Youâve reached your limit, youâre sick and tired of being treated like some delicate creature thatâs incapable of taking care of itself. You literally slapped Tommy Hagan this afternoon in order to help Jonathan, yet here he is basically calling you weak.Â
And yet Nancy is the fighter. Sheâs the one who gets to go along on the adventure while youâre sidelined because for some damn reason youâre always the second option. Never taking matters into your own hands, always the one left behind to clean up the mess and take care of those also discarded.Â
Youâre sick of it.Â
You step closer to Jonathan again, so that youâre nose to nose, and whisper, âIâm tired of never being good enough.âÂ
And with that, you reach into his coat and snatch up his keys, a game youâve always played with him but now has turned into a bitter taste in your mouth, and run back into the gym. Someone has to inform the kids of the plan, make sure theyâll be okay on their own.Â
Dustin sees you approach and smiles, but when he notices the angry pace in your steps, he frowns. âUh oh.â
âYeah, uh oh.âÂ
âJonathan again?â
You nod, still too angry to trust your words. âYeah.âÂ
He notices the keys in your hand. âWhere are you going?â
Mike and Lucas look over now, curious as to whatâs happening.Â
You sigh. âIâm going with Nancy and Jonathan to the Byers house, weâre going to kill the monster.âÂ
âWhy the hell are you going?â Dustin exclaims while Mike shouts âsick!â and Lucas mumbles âgreat, alone againâ. El remains quiet, still resting.Â
You flick your brotherâs hat. âI have to, Dustin.â
âFor Jonathan?â He shakes his head. âI like him, but arenât you mad at him right now?â
âIs it just me, or is she always mad at him these days?â Mike whispers over to Lucas, who simply shrugs.Â
âGirls, man.âÂ
You ignore them and focus on Dustin. âIt doesnât matter. He needs my help, and no one in the party gets left behind. Remember?â
âY/Nââ
âI love you,â you kiss the top of his head. âI promise Iâll be safe, just be careful, okay? Iâm putting you in charge, so donât let me down. If everything goes according to plan, Iâll see you in a few hours tops!â
Dustin tries to argue some more, but you quickly run back outside before he can get another word in. You feel horrible leaving him behind, but you know this is the right decision. If you can kill the monster, thereâs less of a chance of the kids or Joyce and Hopper getting hurt. Jonathan and Nancy may be fine on their own, but thereâs always power in numbers and theyâll need all the help they can get.Â
You just⌠you have to help. You know this is what youâre supposed to be doing, even if it pains you to do so. Dustin and the kids are smart; as long as they stay at the school, theyâll be fine.Â
In theory, that is.
Nancy and Jonathan are waiting for you outside. You push past them and march towards Jonathanâs care; they awkwardly follow after you. You unlock it, throw yourself into the backseat, and promptly dig through your backpack to make sure you have everything.Â
The two teens get in a few minutes after you. Not one word is spoken as Jonathan starts the car and the three of you drive off, leaving Hawkins Middle behind.Â
âÂ
You thought the car ride with Nancy and Jonathan from the funeral home had been tense, but this one? Downright painful.Â
Jonathan has a tight grip on the steering wheel and keeps trying to catch your eye through the rearview mirror but you avoid his gaze. Youâve spent the last five minutes arranging and rearranging your backpack to give you something to do while Nancy has tried three times to make conversation to make this car ride bearable.Â
âEl seems nice.âÂ
âYou said four words to her, Nancy.â You retort, switching open your switchblade once more to watch the moonlight dance off of its blades.Â
âRight.âÂ
Nancy shifts uncomfortably in the passenger seat. You know she realizes sheâs once again upset the balance in your relationship with Jonathan. It was only an hour ago that she tried getting you to admit your feelings for him before convincing the boy to up and leave you. Sure, Jonathan made his own decision in the end, but damn. She couldâve at least pretended to want you around.Â
She notices your knives and tries to spark conversation again. âI love the color of the handle, itâs beautiful.âÂ
âThanks,â you switch the blades closed and sit up in your seat. âAnyways, you geniuses have a plan or were you just counting on ditching me and winging it from there?â
âY/Nââ
âNo, Nancy. I insist, letâs talk about a plan. Weâre here to kill a monster, right?â
She closes her mouth and frowns, turning to Jonathan for help, but heâs no use. Heâs busy tapping his fingers against the wheel and praying that the world will just swallow him up whole. Too bad for him youâre a stubborn pain in the ass and would simply pluck him back up so you can torture him some more.Â
Nancy sighs. âWell, Jonathan and I were thinking we use the supplies we got earlier and lure the monster to his place, then we kill it.âÂ
âAwesome plan, guys!â You say, your voice dripping with sickly sweetness that leaves them both feeling even more uncomfortable. âBut may I suggest some actual details or shall we just bank off of this wonderfully dull and vague plan?âÂ
âSure, Y/N. Tell us what you had in mind.â Nancy rubs her face tiredly, knowing she deserves this.Â
âGreat! Iâm assuming weâre luring the monster with blood?â They nod at you, so you continue. âOkay, so before we lure it I think we should completely booby-trap Jonathanâs house. Nail the bear trap down onto the floor, make sure the floor is cleared of anything that could trip us up. Then, once weâve got the house secured, we knick ourselves to draw some blood and pray to whatever god is up there that we can kill the thing.âÂ
You pause for a moment, remembering how all the Christmas lights had been unscrewed by Joyce earlier. âThe lights, we need to fix them. The monster communicates through the lights so if we have them, then we can track it.â
âThat all sounds great, bug.â Jonathan finally speaks up, ass kissing.Â
âThanks, pal. Still donât have the bug privilege back, but Iâm sure you simply forgot.âÂ
He gulps, once more going back to being silent as he drives you and Nancy to his house.Â
Nancy again tries to diffuse the tension. âHow do we even kill the monster though? I mean, will my bullets be enough?â
âI have this idea, but itâs⌠well, itâs out there.â You bite your lip, now feeling your cocky demeanor slipping. âIf we can safely set fire to it, I think thatâs our best bet.â
âFire?â Jonathan exclaims, but Nancy shushes him.Â
âI think youâre right.âÂ
âY/N, I know youâre mad at me but do we really have to set fire to my houseââ
Now itâs your turn to shush Jonathan. âThis isnât about that. I wouldnât burn your house down, I already told you Iâd just pour tar on your car whenever I get the chance. For now, I really do think the best thing to do is burn the monster alive. In every horror movie and book, fire always gets the job done.âÂ
Despite herself, Nancy lets out a soft chuckle as Jonathan parks the car, now at his house. âSheâs right, Jonathan. And who burns down houses these days? Tar really is the best form of revenge.âÂ
âIâm flattered, Wheeler. At the rate youâre going, youâll be off my shitlist in no time.â You tell her, patting her on the shoulder before getting out of the car. You quickly open up the trunk and gather the monster hunting supplies while Jonathan and Nancy take their time getting out.Â
You let yourself into the Byers home using your own key to the place. Itâs been nestled in between the key to your house and the spare key to Jonathanâs car on your keychain for a few years now.Â
The first thing you get started on are the lights. Thereâs hundreds of them to get through, but you drop your supplies and begin screwing them in one by one. Nancy and Jonathan come in soon after and silently begin to help.Â
No conversation is made besides the necessary comments about the prep work. Youâre all too focused on the possibility of what could happen next; the danger of the situation has finally set in. After the lights have all been fixed, you instruct Jonathan to begin nailing the bear trap down while you and Nancy discuss where to pour the gasoline. You both agree to make a path from the living room to Willâs room.Â
As Nancy pours the gasoline, you follow behind her and pick up any flammables. You weren't lying to Jonathan earlier, you really donât want to burn his house down. While the house is wrecked, itâs still a home despite everything thatâs happened in it. You practically grew up within its walls, youâd do anything to keep it as protected as possible.Â
When youâre done, you watch Nancy load her gun. A shiver runs down our spine; she looks at ease with it, which you figure should be reassuring, but the gravity of everything leaves you feeling on edge. You leave her alone and walk into the kitchen where Jonathan is, now hammering a ton of nails into his bat.Â
You begin to sharpen your blades next to him, still finding that you only feel secure by his side. The rhythmic sound of his hammering calms you, in a sense. It serves as a distraction. You know you insisted on coming, you donât regret it and you know youâre stronger than everyone seems to give you credit for, but youâre also terrified. This isnât just some adventure in the woods; this could kill the ones you love dearly.Â
Once youâre both done preparing your weapons, the two of you walk to Willâs room and rig up a simple snare. Jonathan grabs a yo-yo and you pull up a chair to set it on. The idea is that when the string gets pulled, itâll alert you that the monster has sprung the bear trap. Itâs not the most efficient warning system, but itâll have to do.Â
The last thing to do is set the bear trap, which takes all three of you to achieve. Jonathan and Nancy hold down the edges with their body weight and you very carefully set the trap with your hand. You shake a bit as you do so, but you force your nerves down. You remind yourself that Jonathan thinks youâre too weak, too cowardly, you have to prove him wrong.Â
When the bear trap clicks into place, you let out a harsh exhale and sink against the wall, your heart still pounding. Jonathan and Nancy copy you and the three of you sit in silence. Youâre still shaking a bit, and Jonathan is next to you just as tense, but for the first time since youâve met him you canât reach out to grab his hand to steady yourself. Heâs too far, both literally and figuratively. Even with him next to you, you couldnât be more far apart.Â
In the back of your mind, you hope the kids are alright. Hopefully theyâre having a better night than you currently are.Â
âCâmon,â you say after a few minutes, getting up to walk over to the living room. âWeâve done all we can, now we just have to draw some blood and be the prettiest bait in Hawkins.â
âÂ
Nancy and Jonathan decide to cut the palm of their hands, but you respectfully would rather die than have a matching scar with them. The idea makes you so uncomfortable you visibly cringe when Jonathan tells you the idea. âYeah, no thanks. I think Iâll find somewhere else to cut.âÂ
He looks hurt by what youâve said but doesnât voice it. Instead, the three of you stand in the living room in a triangle facing each other and he begins reciting the plan. âRememberâŚâ
Nancy goes first. âStraight into Willâs room andââÂ
âDonât step on the trap.â You finish.
Jonathan nods. âAnd then?â
âWait for the yo-yo to move.â The girl says.Â
âThenâŚâ Jonathan flicks the lighter on.
You whistle low. âLet there be lightâŚâÂ
âRight. Light.â The boy nods again. âAlright, we ready?â
âReady.â
âScar time.âÂ
Jonathan and Nancy bring their hands up and place their knives flat against their palms. You roll up your sleeve and place your own knife against the upper part of your arm, just below your shoulder, and take a deep breath.Â
âOn three,â Jonathan says. He begins counting and you all canât seem to stop shaking. He senses your unease and looks up at you and Nancy. âYou guys donât have to do this.â
Nancy glares at him, her own voice shaky. âJonathan, stop talking.â
You nod. âYeah, what she said.â
Jonathan tries to argue, but Nancy squeezes her eyes shut and yells, âThree!â
You close your own eyes and slice at your arm, the pain immediate. You gasp out, never having been good with pain, but you know you have to do this for Will. The blood trails down your arm, dripping from your elbow onto the ground, and you watch as blood from Jonathanâs and Nancyâs own cuts falls onto the ground too.Â
Well, at least itâll be an easy scar to hide compared to theirs.Â
âFuck, that stings.â You say to break the silence, and Nancy nods her head in agreement.Â
âNot the most pleasant feeling.âÂ
Jonathan guides the two of you over to the couch and grabs the first aid kit that you had prepared on the coffee table. He sits in the middle, leaving room for both you and Nancy on each side of him, but youâre still pissed at him and opt to sit on the floor in front of the couch.
Nancy begins to patch up his wound, and it takes everything within you not to reach over and help him yourself. It feels unnatural to watch someone else taking care of him, but the space between you still feels too vast to cross.Â
You patch up your own cut while the two of them talk quietly. You wind a bandage tight around your arm, ensuring you wonât bleed through, and Jonathan watches above you with guilt in his eyes. Nancy is trying to reassure him that everything will be okay, but as he watches you struggle to tie the bandage he wonders if heâs fucked up more than just your friendship.
âBug, let me help with that.â He leans down and ties your bandage before you can stop him.Â
You glare at him, still having not said anything to Jonathan besides what was needed for preparation. Nancy distracts herself by cleaning up around his cut and your stomach twists into knots. This is all so miserable.Â
âY/N, I know youâre upset with me and you can go whenever. I wonât blame you, youâve done enough for me.â Jonathan says, trying to catch your eye.Â
You turn away and inspect your bandage, still reeling over the fact that he tied it for you. âIâm here for Will, and only Will.â
âY/NâŚâ Thereâs a hurt in his voice that almost makes you turn around to throw your arms around his neck and whisper a million apologies to him. To tell him everything, that you love him and that youâd do anything for him and thatâs why youâre so terrified of how you feel. You know youâd burn yourself up if it meant heâd be taken care of, if it meant he was safe and happy and far away from anything that could harm him. You know youâd use up everything within you to love him.Â
Instead, you remain silent.
After getting no response from you, Jonathan clears his throat and begins to say something about how the lights will serve as an alarm for the monster, trying to pretend that everything is okay, but heâs cut off by a sudden pounding on the door.
You all jump and your fingers tighten around your switchblade, ready to open it. As your heart pounds you think of all the possible ways the plan could go wrong. When youâre on possibility number twelve, a voice calls through the door.Â
âJonathan?â
âIs that⌠Steve?â You say out loud, in complete disbelief.Â
Steve continues to pound on the door. âAre you there, man? Itâs⌠Itâs Steve! Listen, I just wanna talk!â
Youâre the first to react, standing up to run over to the door. You fling it open and step outside, making sure Steve wonât be able to see inside the house. When he sees you, he stumbles back a bit. âHenderson?â
His face is still bleeding from earlier and his hair is a mess, and yet thereâs a softness to him that you havenât seen before with him. âSteve, now isnât really a good time.â
âCan I just talk to Jonathan real quick? I just⌠I want to apologize about what happened earlier, see if we can maybeââ His eyes land on your bandaged arm. You curse and roll down your sleeve, feeling like an idiot for forgetting to hide the wound before going outside.Â
Steve reaches out to touch it, a hint of worry on his face and his voice is now full of concern. âHey, are you okay?â
You shiver at his touch, itâs gentle as he skims along the bandage and inspects it for any other problems. You pull away, now hiding the wound. âItâs nothing, but you should really go.â
âI want to help you, Y/N. Do you need me to get you anything?â His face is so full of worry for you that it makes you ache. Then a thought occurs to him. âWait, whereâs Byers? Why isnât he here to help you?â
Youâre about to make up a lie, but Nancy flings the door open. âSteve, listen to me.â
He looks between the two of you in complete shock. âOkay, whatââ
âYou need to leave.â Nancy orders.
Steve looks at you. âIâm not trying to start anything, okay?â
âI know, butââ You get cut off by Nancy.
âI donât care about that. You need to leave.â
Steve begins to plead with the girl and you step away a bit, not wanting to intrude. You feel bad for him, he looks so beat down by whatâs happened today and you suppose that you canât really blame him. After spending maybe a total of ten hours with Nancy and Jonathan, you also have come close to losing your mind.Â
If you were with Jonathan, if you truly had him, youâd react the same as Steve. Begging for the girl he loves to listen to him, to give him another chance with the promise of him changing.Â
âI just want to make things right.â Steve says, impressing you with his vulnerability. Heâs openly admitting to his mistakes and taking accountability mere hours after the situation has occurred, leaving you both in awe of him and also saddened for him. He loves Nancy more than anything, you can hear it in his voice.Â
He deserves better.Â
As youâre thinking this, you see his eyes flicker down towards Nancyâs bandaged hand and his brows furrow. âWhat happened to your hand? Is that blood?â His eyes now flicker over to you again. âWhy are you both hurt?â
âWeâre clumsy?â You say as Nancy yanks her hand away from Steve.
âIt was an accident.â She agrees.Â
Steve looks between the two of you, now sensing that something else is wrong. âWhatâs going on?âÂ
âNothing!â Nancy insists, but something in Steveâs demeanor shifts.Â
âWait a second, did he do this to you? To Y/N?â His once soft voice is now filled with anger and you step in front of him.Â
âSteve, it wasnât Jonathan. You need to go, I promise Iâll explain everything laterââÂ
He grabs you by your side and gently moves you so that he can get past and shove through the door. Nancy yells at him to stop and tries to push him out, but sheâs useless against his strength. When he manages to break in, he stumbles inside and scans over the house.Â
âShit!â You follow after him, your brain running a million miles a second trying to figure out how to explain everything to him.Â
âWhat the fuck?â Steve mumbles, eyeing the bat with nails in it. âY/N, whatâs going on here?â
Heâs looking to you for reassurance and you guess he assumes that the two of you are allies in this Jonathan and Nancy situation. You really wish you could explain, but Jonathan has grabbed him by the shoulders and is trying to push him outside. The two stumble around for a few seconds and you just helplessly watch.Â
âSteve, thereâs no time to explain, please just listen to Jonathan and get out of here!â Youâre helping Jonathan now, trying to get Steve out the door and away from harmâs reach, but heâs still fighting back confused and lost as ever and you pity him.Â
You hear a click and turn around, gasping when you see Nancy holding her gun up to Steve. âWoah, what the fuck Nancy?â
âWhat! What is going on?â Steve yells, now more panicked than anything else.Â
While Jonathan has stepped away, you find yourself standing in front of Steve as if to somehow block the bullet. You canât let him get hurt, he doesnât have any part of this, he can still have a normal and happy life if he just leaves now. âNancy, put the fucking gun down, this isnât helping!â
Steve pleads with her as well and the two of you scream at the girl to just listen and not swing around loaded weapons, but Nancy remains firm in her stance. âYou have five seconds to get out of here. Iâm doing this for you.â
âBecause holding a gun to his head is any better than telling him the truth?â You exclaim, entirely over the situation.Â
As the four of you are arguing, the lights begin to flicker. Steve and Nancy donât seem to notice, but you do. You look at Jonathan and say your first real words to him in hours. âJonathanâŚâ
He hears you and he runs over to your side, grabbing your hand as the two of you stand shoulder to shoulder. You feel your heartbeat race and you can feel him shaking beside you. Heâs terrified, so are you, but his hand around yours manages to steady you.Â
âNancy!â Jonathan tries to get the girlâs attention, but sheâs too busy counting down to hear him.Â
He shouts at her again and the lights start to flicker more wildly and you draw your switchblade out, adrenaline coursing through you. Itâs time.Â
Jonathan yells once more and finally catches Nancyâs attention. âThe lights!â
She whips her head around and curses, Jonathan, still tightly holding your hand, tugs you along so that you follow him as he secures his weapons and grabs the bat. âItâs here.â
âWhatâs here?â Steve is flailing around, utterly lost.
You all ignore him and now stand back to back in a triangle. Nancy holds up her gun, Jonathan wields his bat, and you flick your wrist to bring out your knives. âWhere is it?â
âI donât know!âÂ
The lights flicker rapidly and you feel overwhelmed. They were supposed to serve as a guide towards the monster, but there's no possible way to see which direction itâll come from and for a fleeting moment you think youâve made a huge mistake.Â
Steve is still screaming, demanding answers, but youâre too busy scanning your surroundings to offer him some information. âHello? Will someone please explain to me what the hell is goingââ
The roof opens up, cutting Steve off, and you scream as the monster attempts to come down right above you. Jonathan shields you from the fallen debris and you cling onto him in utter fear. This isnât real. This cannot be happening.Â
Nancy begins to shoot at the thing while Jonathan guides you to safety. He brings you to the edge of the living room and holds your face in his hands, forcing you to really look at him for the first time all night. âListen to me, stay here while I get Nancy.â
He kisses your forehead and then leaves, rushing over to Nancy to pull her away and guide her towards Willâs room. Steve stands next to you, frozen, and it forces you back to reality. The plan, you have to stick to the plan.Â
You grab Steveâs hand and yank him so that he follows. The monster has dropped down now, a horrible creature on all fours that opens its gaping mouth to let out a horrible screech that you feel deep within your bones. This is what killed Barb.Â
The four of you run to Willâs room and you only just barely have enough time to warn Steve about the bear trap. You look over your shoulder and shout, âJump!â right as your ankle catches on its chains.Â
You fall. Hard.Â
Pain sears through your ankle and you try to get up, but any pressure on it sends flames through your entire body and you let out another scream. The monster catches up, looming over you, and you brace for your death. Thereâs no fucking way youâre getting out of this.Â
You squeeze your eyes as the monster stalks close to you, its ugly mouth open and ready to kill you. Jonathan is screaming at you to get up, but Nancy is holding him back from helping. Youâre relieved by this, knowing that someone has to be there for Will once this is all done. Heâll need his brother, and Nancy seems to understand this. You catch her eye and nod at her, sending a silent thank you.Â
âBug! No, let go of me! I have to help her, Nancy!â Jonathanâs voice becomes hoarse by how loud he screams, his voice breaking with fear and desperation.Â
Then, right before the monster lunges at you, you feel a familiar pair of arms slide underneath your legs and pick you up. âWhatââ
Steve Harrington has swooped in to save you, picking you up as if you weigh nothing, ever the athlete, and swiftly jumps over the bear trap while screaming his head off. âOh my god, oh my god, oh my god!â
Youâre so delirious from the pain in your ankle and the adrenaline pumping through your veins that you canât help but let a laugh escape you. No fucking way is any of this real. Steve Harrington is carrying you bridal style into Willâs bedroom with Jonathan and Nancy as witnesses.Â
What a life.Â
Once youâre both secured in the room, Steve sets you down gently right as Nancy yells at him to shut up. As soon as Steve lets go of you, Jonathan is at your side and pulls you into a crushing hug.Â
âBug.â He breathes out against your ear, relief heavy.Â
âIâm okay.â You tell him, threading your fingers through his hair. Heâs shaking harder than ever, and holding onto you as if heâs scared heâll lose you again. âIâm okay, bee.âÂ
He pulls away and his hands are all over you, checking everywhere for any other injuries. âDid it hurt you, are you bleeding? There should be a first aid kitââ
You grab his hands and kiss his knuckles, which seems to calm him down a bit. âIâm fine, just twisted my ankle. If you help me up, Iâm sure Iâll be able to stand again.âÂ
Jonathan quickly helps you to your feet and you lean against him for the extra support. While you put on a brave face for Jonathan, youâre terrified out of your fucking mind. You almost died. Jonathan is still holding your hand and heâs looking at you as if seeing you for the first time and you force yourself to look away. Itâs the same look from the field days ago, when you thought heâd kiss you.Â
You have to focus on whatâs at stake.
How the hell are you guys supposed to kill this thing?
The monster screeches, breaking the moment between you and Jonathan, and he flicks his lighter on and forces you to stand behind him. Nancy holds up her gun and you bring your knives closer to your face, Steve standing weaponless behind you.Â
You all wait, tense, for the monster. It stalks closer to the room, its awful growls alerting you of its proximity, but it doesnât appear.Â
âWhatâs it doing?â Nancy asks, frustrated.Â
âI donât know.â You respond, equally as frustrated and scared.Â
Another few agonizing seconds pass, and you stare at the yo-yo and hope that it remains still. Then, the lights stop flickering and it becomes quiet. All you can hear is your blood roaring in your ears.Â
Nancy looks around. âDo you hear anything?â
âNo,â Jonathan shakes his head, inching closer to the door.Â
âWait!â You tug at your still interlocked hands. You pick up his bat that had been thrown on the ground and hand it to him. âBe careful. Please.â
He gives your hand one last squeeze before letting go, accepting the bat.
As Jonathan pokes his head out to see if the monster is outside, Steve bends his head down and whispers in your ear, âRomantic.â
âShut. Up.â You hit him in the chest, fearfully watching your best friend to make sure he doesn't die. When he motions an all clear, Nancy follows him outside, then you, then Steve.Â
The house is silent and your heart sinks when you see that the bear trap has been left untouched. You realize with a horrible gut wrench that the monster is smarter than the three of you had anticipated.Â
So much for your plan, then.
âItâs smarter than we thought.âÂ
âYeah,â Jonathan agrees with dismay.Â
He stalks against the wall towards the living room and you all follow in a single file line. You do your best to stick close to the wall but you limp with every step. Your ankle is definitely out of commission for now. Great.Â
All of you are on edge, waiting for the other shoe to drop. It couldnât have been that easy, thereâs no possible way that the monster simply up and left. You enter the living room, which has gotten even more wrecked due the monster. The wallpaper has been torn off of some parts of the wall and you see papers scattered everywhere.Â
âShitâŚâ you mumble, kicking at a shredded wallpaper strip.Â
In the corner, Steve has started to hyperventilate and mumble to himself. âThis is crazy, this is so crazy, this is fucking crazy.âÂ
You limp over to him and grab his shoulders, making him face you. âSteve, hey. Itâs okay, Iâm here.â
âY/N, what the hell just happened?âÂ
âItâs⌠complicated. For now, can you trust me that everything will be okay?âÂ
âOf course I trust you, itâs justâŚâ He nods, his eyes softening. You lessen your hold on him and give him a smile, he seems to be calming down. Then, he looks around the room and seemingly remembers where he is. âThis is crazy!âÂ
Steve lunges for the phone on the wall and tries to call for help.Â
You stumble after him, the pain in your ankle slowing you down. âSteve, waitââ
Nancy gets to him first, grabbing the phone out of his hand and throwing it across the room. He looks at her, shocked. âWhat are you doing? Are you insane?â
âItâs going to come back!â Nancy yells at him, and you wince at the way she treats him. You know Steve will only listen to her, but she could at least be nicer about the whole situation. The three of you have had some time to process everything happening, Steve was thrown into the deep end.Â
âYou could be a little nicer,â you mumble, and Nancy sends you a glare. You raise your hands up in surrender. âSorry.âÂ
âSteve, you need to leave. Right now.â
He looks so overwhelmed and you give him a pitying look. He stares at you, reminiscent of the way he looked at you earlier in the alley, silently begging you to say something, anything, but again you can only shake your head at him. You wonât force him to stay, it wouldnât be fair.
âY/N, pleaseâŚâ He tries one more time to get you on his side, but you canât. Frustrated by your lack of response, Steve groans. âFuck it!âÂ
He runs out the door.Â
Youâll admit that youâre a bit disappointed, but you also understand. Who in their right mind would stay?Â
You and Nancy share a look before the lights begin to flicker again. Dread fills you. âFuckâŚâ
Jonathan is back by your side and he and Nancy again form a triangle with you, all your backs pressed together as you desperately try to locate the monster. You all stumble in a circle, searching for any sign of the thing, but thereâs nothing.Â
âWhere is it?â Nancy gasps out.
âJust fucking show yourself!â You shout, just wanting this all to be over with. Your body is drained from living in a state of fear for so long.Â
âCome on you son of a bitch!â Jonathan echoes your taunts.Â
Suddenly the lights turn off and youâre left alone in complete darkness. Faintly you can hear the monsterâs familiar growl approaching from behind you. The hair on the back of your neck stands up, the air stands still. Itâs back. Before you can react, it pounces on Jonathan.Â
âJonathan!â You scream alongside Nancy. Desperation takes over you and before you can even process whatâs happening, you ignore the pain in your ankle and jump onto its back, stabbing repeatedly at it.Â
Your blades only bounce off of its thick skin and the monster struggles to get you off. You hold on as tight as you can, shouting and kicking at it so that it canât hurt him, but then it opens its mouth and for a horrifying moment youâre afraid that Jonathan will die.
âNo!â You scream even louder than before and double down on your effort, stabbing and slashing as much as you possibly can to try and create some damage, but your arms are starting to ache and your ankle now feels like itâs on fire.Â
âNancy, its skin is too thick!â You sob out, nearing complete exhaustion. Then, just as youâre about to collapse from exhaustion, gunshots fill the room.Â
Nancy begins to shoot at the monster and with the help of your blades, the two of you manage to pierce its skin, but even then the damage is minimal. Itâs not enough, it wonât be enough. Tears stream down your face and the monster only gets closer to Jonathan, so you do the only thing you can think of: you crawl onto the top of its body and stab at its mouth.Â
The monster lets out a blood curdling scream and flings you off of its back. You go flying across the room and land against the wall with a groan. All the air has been knocked out of you and your ribs are definitely going to be bruised tomorrow. Every part of you aches, but you manage to lift your head up and blearily process the monster now approaching Nancy as she continues to shoot at it, but it remains unphased.Â
You crawl over to Jonathan, who is still laying on the ground. Heâs motionless, and you fight everything within you not to break down and sob. You have to keep going, he has to be alive. As you reach Jonathan and frantically check for a pulse, the monster has now cornered Nancy and her gun seems to be out of bullets.
Itâs over. You know it is.Â
Right as youâve accepted your fate, a screaming Steve Harrington wielding Jonathanâs bat once again manages to save the day.Â
He hits the monster with the bat, effectively saving Nancy and youâre so impressed with his batting skills that you almost find him attractive with how easily he hits and dodges the monster. However, you file those thoughts away for later and finally manage to wake Jonathan up. He startles with a gasp and you check over his chest, scared he may have gotten pierced by the monsterâs claws.Â
âIâm fine, we need to help.â
You help each other up and you have to lean heavily against him due to your ankle. You bull riding the monster has only made the sprain worse; youâre too afraid to look down and see the damage thatâs been done.Â
As the two of you hobble over to Nancy, Jonathan looks at you. âIs Harrington really here right now?â
âYes.â
âLovely.â
Steve manages to lure the monster closer and closer to the bear trap and you watch him in awe. Heâs quick footed and so sure of himself, the complete opposite of the boy from only ten minutes ago who had run out of the house screaming his head off. Now, Steve is swift with his hits and even twirls the bat in his hand to show off. The small act causes you to smile despite the horrible circumstances.Â
By the time you and Jonathan are up and recovered, Steve has successfully led the monster straight into the trap. It clamps around the monsterâs foot and it screeches, flailing around in the trap. Steve still has his bat held up, now frantically looking over to everyone else. âHeâs in the trap! Heâs stuck!â
âJonathan, now!â Nancy screams, motioning over at him to use his lighter.Â
Jonathan listens, using his free hand to flick the lighter on and then drops it onto the ground, right into the trail of gasoline. Immediately the monster goes up in flames, letting out horrible noises. You all shield your faces from the flames and Jonathan pulls you closer into him, still having yet to let go of you; you feel yourself sink into his side as you watch the monster wither away.
âBug, I have to get the fire extinguisher, do you think you can stand on your own?â Jonathan asks you, his voice soft but urgent.Â
You quickly nod and brace yourself for his departure. âYeah, go.âÂ
He lets go of you as gently as possible before running to grab the extinguisher. When he has it, he orders everyone to get back and then smothers the flames. It takes a couple seconds, but eventually the fire gets put out, leaving behind an awful stench that makes everyone cough and gag.Â
âHoly fuck,â you wheeze out, hunched over. âBurnt monster smells horrible.âÂ
âYeah, no kidding.â Steve coughs out.Â
Nancy covers her face with her jacket. âWhere did it go?â
âIt has to be dead.â Jonathan pants against the wall, looking like heâs three seconds away from passing out. âIt has to be.â
âIt fucking better be dead.â You mumble, hobbling closer to see what exactly was left behind. When you get closer and see the giant lump of melted skin all over the bear trap, you gag. âOh god. Yeah, okay. Itâs dead.â
Everyone sighs with relief.Â
Then, you notice a Christmas light above you flicker on. Your heart stops, terrified that the monster has somehow survived, but then a second one turns on, then a third, until a path seems to be guiding you towards the living room.Â
You all follow, cautious but curious, but these lights donât feel threatening. Thereâs an energy to them, a comforting one that leaves you breathless. When you get to the living room, tears form in your eyes, now understanding what this all is. You look at Jonathan, who also seems to be thinking what you are.Â
Itâs Joyce, you know it is.Â
âMom,â he breathes out.Â
You limp over to him and grab his hand. He turns to you, his eyes shining with an appreciation that he only ever has for you. He seems to be drinking you in, as if now realizing just how close the two of you came to dying tonight. Youâre doing the same, thankful that heâs alive and standing next to you despite everything. Thereâs so much the two of you want to say, but as always the words arenât needed. You understand each other perfectly, the balance between you centered once more.Â
You put your head on Jonathanâs shoulder and he brings his hand to your hair to softly stroke it. The two of you stand like that for a second, breathing each other in and enjoying the tenderness after such a miserable day, before you slowly break apart and follow the lights going outside.Â
The porch light flickers and Nancy stands next to you, watching it with uncertainty. âWhereâs it going?â
âI donât think itâs the monster.â Jonathan tells her.Â
âItâs Will.â You donât know how you know this, or what makes you feel so certain that youâre right, but somehow you know that you are. Somewhere deep within you, you feel the faint outline of hope flicker.Â
A new silence surrounds the four of you at your words, and for once thereâs hope between you all. Then, after a minute or so of silence, everyone begins to head back inside. Steve first, then Nancy, and finally Jonathan, leaving you alone with the crisp early winter air.
You take a deep breath, the cold air serving as a reminder that youâre alive. You let it fill your lungs until you canât breathe in anymore, then you release the air through an exhale and feel your body settle into its exhaustion. This is the first time youâve had a moment to yourself, so you let the exhaustion weigh upon you like a warm blanket.Â
Will is safe, you can feel it. Despite everything, heâs safe and alive. Jonathan is too, still your best friend regardless of all the unspoken words between the two of you. Dustin is at the school with the kids, away from danger. Everything is okay, itâll be okay.Â
You let the moment wash over you, incredibly grateful to be lucky enough to have survived it all. Everyone you love and hold close to you is safe. You didnât fuck up this time. God, you did it.Â
Jonathan comes running out after a while, his face alight with joy and he crashes into you and picks you up to twirl you around. You laugh, loud and freely, and bury your face in his hair as he continues. âBee, stop! Put me down, you dummy!âÂ
He does as heâs told, but doesnât let go of you once your feet are on the ground. âMy mom just called, they saved Will. Heâheâs in the hospital, heâs okay.âÂ
You squeal and throw your arms around Jonathan again, squeezing him so hard that youâre afraid you'll hurt him, but he simply laughs and squeezes you just as tight. Tears come again, but this time theyâre happy ones, and if it werenât for your ankle youâd be jumping up and down right now.Â
Jonathanâs laughter dies down and he cups your chin around his fingers so that you look up at him. âYou did it.âÂ
âWe did it, bug.â You softly push against him. You canât take all the credit.Â
His eyes are shining again, you havenât seen him this happy in so long, you get lost in it. His face is lit up and his smile is back and youâre so in love with him that it claws against your throat and threatens to spill out in excess.
A beat of silence passes and Jonathan just soaks your presence in. You canât quite read his face, but for once this doesnât frighten you. You enjoy it, you relish in the fact that heâs still yours yet now forming into someone new and lovely and wonderful.Â
âYou never gave up.â He whispers at last, adoration in his voice.Â
âNever.âÂ
âYou never left me.âÂ
âNever.â You breathe out, the word so simple with such heavy weight behind it.Â
The moment is so raw, so tender, and Jonathan is giving you that look again, the one that leaves you feeling like the sun itself has settled upon you and kissed your cheek. His eyes flick down to your lips and you smile, taunting him to lean in. He seems to understand, giving you his own teasing smile before leaning in. You lean in as well, every part of you buzzing, and right before your lips touch his, Steve bursts through the door.
âJonathan, dude, do you have like, any food in the house?â He asks, completely oblivious to what heâs just interrupted.Â
You and Jonathan break apart, laughing the tension away. He ducks his head down, clears his throat, and turns to Steve. âSorry, man. Been a little busy this week for grocery shopping.â
Steveâs eyes bulge out of his head. âOh shit, right. Sorry, okay. Uh⌠Well, Iâll be inside, I guess.âÂ
âWeâll be in shortly.â You tell Steve. You want to be frustrated by his timing, but something tells you that youâll have all the time in the world to tell Jonathan how you feel. Now just isnât the time.Â
âÂ
The moment you arrive at the hospital, Jonathan sprints out of the car and straight towards the front desk to find out where Will is. You and Nancy follow behind, figuring you wonât be able to see Will for a while since youâre not blood related, so the two of you wish Jonathan goodbye and head towards the waiting room.Â
Steve lags behind, obviously unsure where to go. Nancy immediately walks inside, but you notice his hesitation and nudge his shoulder. âIâm sure that the cut on your eyebrow needs to be looked out. Letâs go sit, okay?â
He sighs deeply. âYeah, sure. Totally. Letâs go sit in a room full of people who probably hate me. No biggie.â
âEither come or donât.â You shrug. âBut the way I see it, you can start mending some metaphorical wounds while you wait in there.â
You donât wait for Steve to figure out what to do, you know that Dustin is somewhere inside the waiting room and youâre buzzing to see him and the rest of the kids. You hobble inside, still very much in pain due to your injuries, but the moment you see your brother it all fades away.Â
He runs into your arms and almost knocks you down with the force. Dustin clings onto you, mumbling over and over again how sorry he is.Â
âHey, wait a second,â you pull him away and crouch down, groaning a bit at the pain. âWhat are you sorry about? What happened?â
You look around the room and see everyone there. Nancy, Hopper, the kids, Steve, even Nancyâs parents, but thereâs someone missingâŚ
âEl,â you breathe out.Â
Dustinâs lip trembles and he begins to cry. You soothe him, grabbing his hand to bring him over to the seats and sit between him and Mike. Lucas is to the left of Dustin and you canât help but notice how all the boys have dried tears in their eyes.Â
When theyâre ready, you have the kids explain what happened, and the more they tell you, the more guilty you feel. You shouldâve been there for them, you left them all alone with that monster. You got Will back, and yet youâve lost El as a result. It seems that no matter what you do, itâll never quite be enough in the end.Â
âItâs not your fault.â You tell Dustin, who still keeps apologizing. It was you who had left him in charge, youâre why El ended up vanquished by the monster. âYou did everything you could. I shouldnât have left you guys all alone, but Iâm proud that you all took care of one another, okay?â
He sniffs and nods his head, but you know he doesnât believe you. All the boys are somber; you know itâll take time for them to recover. So, you do what you do best, you console them. You hold their hands and rub their backs and offer your spare comics in your bag. You do whatever you can to comfort them, to reassure them that theyâre safe now and that no one will hurt them, but the light in their eyes has dimmed.Â
Theyâll never be the same again.Â
And El⌠she had been so young, you donât think youâll ever not feel the heavy weight of guilt whenever you think of her. She had been so sweet and had trusted you.Â
You shouldâve been there, you wish you couldâve saved her.
Steve watches from his seat across from you. He listens in as you comfort the boys, taking care of them in such a natural way. He admires this softer side of you, one he hasnât quite seen before. Sure, youâve always been gentle and sincere, but watching you with the kids is something special in itself. You manage to get them to laugh, you offer them your shoulder to cry or sleep on, and you read aloud to them stories from your comics and Steve finds himself drawn towards your interactions with the kids.Â
Itâs sweet, something delicate and lovely, and Steve admires everything that you are. When he sees you awkwardly stand up and stumble over to the vending machines in the hall, Steve finds himself following after you.Â
-
âBitch!â You slam the palm of your hand against the vending machine in vain. The bag of chips hangs by the little spiral, taunting you.Â
âThatâs not a very nice word, Henderson.âÂ
You turn and see Steve, leaning against the wall with a fond expression. âYou stalking me?â
âNah, just wanted to watch you fight against a vending machine.â
âHa,â you snort, turning back to the machine. âUnless you can help me get this last chip bag, youâre free to go sit back down.â
You mean it to be a joke, not expecting Steve to actually listen, but heâs at your side within a second. âStep back, let Steve handle her.âÂ
âWhatââ
Steve motions for you to move, so you reluctantly do as youâre told. Once youâre out of the way, Steve claps his hands, stretches out his neck, and then begins to aggressively shake the vending machine.Â
âThat is so not what youâre supposed to doââ
Suddenly the bag drops down from the hook and into the retrieval slot. Steve reaches inside, grabs the bag, and then dangles it in the air. âTada!âÂ
You laugh and grab the bag from him. âOkay, Iâll admit, that was impressive.âÂ
âWhat can I say? Iâm charming like that.âÂ
âSure,â you smile at him, neither of you have moved yet. Heâs still standing in front of you with that cocky smile on his face thatâs slowly started to warm on you. You truly do understand why so many girls have fallen for him. If you ever saw Steve on the street, a stranger passing by, youâd fall a little bit in love with him yourself.
The thought startles you. âWell, uhâŚâ
âYes?â Steve raises his eyebrows at you, smiling.Â
âThank you for the chips. The kids havenât eaten anything in hours, soâŚâ You wave the three bags in your arms. âGotta keep 'em fed.â
âWait a second, thereâs only three bags there. Arenât you going to eat anything?â
âI only had enough money for the boyâs chips.â You say, feeling suddenly sheepish. âItâs fine, though. Iâll just eat a few pieces from them and wait until we get home.â
Steve scoffs. âYeah, no.â
You frown at him, confused as he rustles through his jean pocket and pulls out his wallet. âI donât want your moneyââ
He doesnât listen and simply puts the cash into the vending machine and punches in a few numbers. Slowly, one by one, multiple different bags of sweets and chips come falling down within the machine. Once the last one has dropped, Steve bends down and offers the huge stash to you.Â
âA feast, on me.â He winks at you and you canât help but blush.Â
âTâthanks, I guess.â You now carefully balance the rest of the snacks in your arms, the mound almost blocking your view. Youâre not sure how much Steve just paid, but with all these snacks you and the kids will surely be well fed.Â
Steve shrugs, and if you werenât so tired youâd think the blush on his face was a real one. âItâs the least I can do, all things considered.â
His words give you pause. You know heâs referencing earlier today, back in the alley where fists slammed against skin and he had dragged you away from your best friend, but the memory feels like years ago. So much has happened since then, Steve has saved your life since then.Â
âSteveâŚâ Your ankle is starting to sting again from standing for so long, so you adjust your footing and try to figure out what you want to say. âI never got to thank you back at Jonathanâs.â
âThank me?â His face scrunches in confusion in a sickeningly cute way that it almost distracts you.
âYes. You saved my life tonight, Steve. I wonât ever forget that.âÂ
âOhâŚThereâs no need to thank me. I mean, what are friends for?â Steve freezes and clears his throat. âI mean, shit. We arenât friends, you keep saying that. Sorry. You know what I mean.â
You know you shouldnât, but you laugh. Honestly, after everything youâve been through tonight with Steve, how can he possibly think the two of you arenât friends?
âWhy are you laughing?â Steve mumbles, confused.Â
âSorry,â you wheeze out, still uncontrollably laughing. âItâs justâI mean, dude! We almost died together, of course weâre friends now!â
âWe are?â He looks like a little kid on Christmas day being given the gift heâs always wanted.
Your heart warms. âYes, idiot.â
Steve starts moving around in what you can only guess is a happy dance. âSweet! Does this mean I get a cool nickname, too?â
âA nickname?â A bag of chips threatens to fall from your arms, but Steve catches it before it can land on the ground and takes a few more snacks off of your hands.Â
He readjusts the snacks he now has so that he can carry them easier. âYeah, I mean. Byers has one, why canât I?â
You donât think youâll ever stop feeling so thrown every time Steve mentions a small detail about you that heâs somehow come to notice. He has a habit of doing that, surprising you by how much he seems to pay attention to you. You thought that no one ever had before, but Steve continues to prove you wrong.Â
âIâll tell ya what,â you begin to walk back towards the waiting room, careful to step carefully to not drop anything or upset your ankle. âLetâs see how this âfriendsâ thing works out, then Iâll decide what nickname fits you best. Deal?â
Steve thinks for a moment and follows. âHmm. I donât know, I think Iâll need some type of precaution to make sure you give me a nickname in the end. I want one, Y/N. Iâm so serious right now.â
You laugh at his pleading tone. âI can add you to my baking list. Whatever I bake, youâll get a piece of it. Is that better?â
âGod, yes!â Steve punches the air and cheers.Â
Youâre smiling so much that your face aches. You havenât felt this light and carefree in so long, youâd almost forgotten what itâs like. The two of you donât say anything else as you walk back to the waiting room, though Steve seems to slow down so that you donât hurt your ankle keeping up, though you still let out a few winces and groans.
When youâve arrived back at your seat, Steve sets down the snacks and runs off without another word. Youâre confused by his sudden departure but donât think much of it. Instead, you wake the boys up and show them your array of snacks, which wakes them up immediately.Â
Youâre mediating a fight between Mike and Lucas over who gets the bag of Chips Ahoy when a nurse interrupts. âExcuse me, maâam. This young man over here told me I should come over and check out your ankle?â
The woman smiles and you look past her and see Steve sheepishly waving from his seat across from you. Youâre stunned. Had he really gone out of his way to ensure your ankle gets treated?
You shake the thoughts out of your head and inform the woman all she needs to know. You tell her how youâd fallen and what type of pain you feel when you stand up. She inspects the ankle, her fingers cold but kind, and within a few minutes has diagnosed you with a sprained ankle.Â
âAll you can really do is stay off of it for a few weeks while it heals. I can go and get you some crutches, if youâd like?â She asks, rolling her gloves off and tucking them back into her pocket.
You nod. âIf you wouldnât mind, thatâd be great.â
The nurse leaves with the promise of being back soon. In the meantime she instructs you to keep your ankle elevated, so you prop it against the coffee table and wait. Youâre annoyed that you even have to have crutches, but then you think of Barb, of El. Youâre luckier than you should be.Â
âÂ
After an hour or so, Jonathan opens the door to the waiting room. He spots you and Mike talking softly with each other and whistles over to catch your attention. When Mike looks up, Jonathan nods at him and the boy scrambles out of his seat.Â
âGuys! Guys! Heâs up, Will is up!â Mike shakes awake Lucas and Dustin, who had been cuddling on the seats fast asleep. âWillâs up!â
Once theyâre awake, they quickly follow after Mike and the three boys are gone in an instant, sprinting down the hall towards Willâs room. Clearly theyâre eager to see their friend.Â
You do your best to get up as fast as possible, but your new crutches serve more as a nuisance rather than an aid. As you struggle to get up, somehow knocking over the mountain of snacks, Steve rushes over.Â
He grabs the crutches and offers you his hand. âHere, careful.â
âThanks,â you awkwardly accept his hand and get up. Jonathan watches from the doorway, a curious look on his face. Nancy does the same from her seat, not saying a word as she watches Steve gently help you navigate the waiting room with your injury.Â
Jonathan holds the door open for you and takes over once youâre out the door. He grabs the crutches from Steve and is now the one to hold your hand, balancing you. âI can take it from here, Harrington.â
âRight, yeah.â Steve scratches the back of his head and coughs. âIâll just⌠yeah.âÂ
He heads back inside and you and Jonathan watch as he leaves. As soon as heâs out of earshot, Jonathan turns to you. âAre you two friends now or something?â
âWe almost died tonight, bee. I think itâs safe to call Steve a friend now.â
Jonathan bites his lip, though thereâs a far off look in his eye that leaves you feeling like youâve missed something in the conversation. âGuess thatâs true. Anyways, letâs get you to Will.â
By the time you make it to the room, the boys have swarmed around Will and are telling him everything heâs missed this week. Heâs listening eagerly as theyâre telling him about El, but when he sees you enter the room, his eyes light up and he tries to sit up.Â
âY/N!â Will calls out, pure excitement in his voice.Â
You practically fall over in your haste to get to him. The second youâre close enough, you collapse onto his bed and give him the tightest hug you possibly can without hurting him. He feels so small against you, smaller than heâs ever felt before, and his sunken eyes and pale skin make you want to cry.Â
But heâs alive and here and in your arms once again, happy and wonderful and safe.Â
âLittle bee,â you try not to cry, but tears are thick in your voice. âI missed you.â
Will manages a weak smile and shrugs, trying to play off the gravity of the situation. âTook a little detour home.âÂ
You laugh and ruffle his hair. âAt least you came home, thatâs all that matters.â
âAhem,â Mike obnoxiously clears his throat, effectively ending your moment with Will. âYouâre hogging Will, move over.âÂ
You laugh again and move away, allowing the boys to resume their millions of updates. You maneuver your crutches and walk over to Jonathan, who is standing by the door. Heâs looking at the boys and Will with a soft smile on his face and you join him, standing side by side as you watch your boys finally come together again.Â
Then, you feel a pair of eyes on you and you turn around. Nancy is leaning against the doorway behind you; she looks frail and distraught. Thereâs a sadness in her eyes as she watches the kids. You know that watching the boys reunite with their friend must remind her of Barb. She never got her happy reunion.Â
You feel awful for the girl, so when her bittersweet smile drops and she turns to leave the room, you nudge Jonathan to make him aware of the situation. He sees her fleeing and begins to follow after her, but he stops.Â
âWhat are you waiting for? Go.â You tell him, knowing itâs for the best.Â
He shifts his weight, uncertain. âAre you sure?â
Youâre not sure how to decipher the hidden meanings underneath those three words, but you find that youâre exhausted trying to keep reading between the lines. The feelings youâve kept buried bubble to the surface, but you remind yourself that he loves Nancy, despite your weird moments of almost with him. Thereâs something there between you and Jonathan, you both can feel it, but it feels too raw and fragile to bring into the light.Â
Without having to ask, you know that Jonathan will choose her.Â
It breaks your heart, but you look over at Dustin and Will, who are laughing about some joke while Joyce gazes at them fondly, and you know that you canât lose this. Maybe Jonathan knows this, too. The small family youâve built together, itâs too precious to ruin.Â
Joyce and your boys, you canât lose them. Theyâre yours, and Jonathan is yours in a way that you canât quite keep to yourself forever, but for now itâs enough. You approach Joyce, grab her hand and give her a tired smile, and the smile she returns to you reminds you that this is more than enough for you.Â
You turn to Jonathan, pushing down your feelings once more in favor of appreciating the fact that Will is looking at you again, alive. âGo, bee.âÂ
Jonathan gives you one last look. You study his face for a moment, watching as it shifts from confusion, to hurt, then finally into acceptance. Youâll never be sure of what exactly heâd been thinking in that moment, but it seemed to have been enough for him, too.
He smiles, lets out a deep breath, and then leaves.
The door closes softly behind him.Â
âÂ
A month later you find yourself in the passenger seat of Jonathan's car, tired from your shift at Bookstrordinary but excited to pick up your brothers. Somehow, even after missing three consecutive shifts last month, Mrs. Waters refused to fire you.Â
But Jonathan? He hadnât been so lucky. His boss fired him from the Hawk, but he hadnât been too upset. He still drives you to and from work, so you suppose things could be worse.Â
Itâs late, but the two of you take your time driving to the Wheelerâs. Nothing much has changed between you two following Willâs reappearance. Sure, maybe youâre at his house more just to make sure Will is adapting well, but besides that everything seemed to go back to normal.Â
Well, almost normal.Â
Steve appeared at your job a few days after your conversation in the hospital. He had surprised you when you walked in, and when you asked what he was doing in a bookstore, Steve simply shrugged and said, âYou canât figure out my nickname if we donât hang out, right? So, Iâm here.â
He had become a regular at the store, stopping by whenever he could, and slowly the two of you became good friends. Youâve come to enjoy Steveâs presence, something that you never thought would ever happen. But he keeps you company as you work, he wanders around and explores the comics and books you recommend to him, and itâs nice having someone to goof off with.Â
Plus, you did promise to add him to your baking list, so heâs also become your taste tester who happily eats any creation you bring in for him.
As for NancyâŚ
That was more of a sore subject for Jonathan.Â
There was a few weeks following Willâs reappearance that you thought Jonathan and Nancy would get together, but it never happened. Youâre not quite sure why, maybe it had something to do with Jonathanâs hesitation of approaching her, but it had crushed him when you and he saw Nancy and Steve making out in the hall as if nothing bad had ever happened.Â
The way Jonathanâs face crumbled when he saw the couple only solidified that heâd never be yours, but you comforted him anyways. You told him he deserved better and then dragged him away. Itâd taken him a few days, but eventually Jonathan was able to fake a smile again.Â
You havenât spoken about it since that day, but you leave your window open most nights for him to crawl in. The nightmares from that night fighting the monster plague you both, and the loneliness feels a little heavier than usual, but at least you have each other.Â
âJonathan! Y/N! Come in, the boys are downstairs.â Mrs. Wheeler answers the door, letting the two of you in. âAnd Y/N, I love that sweater on you.â
You thank the woman. âIt was a gift from my mom. She claims I need to up my wardrobe, whatever that means.â
âWell, I think she has lovely taste.âÂ
âIâll let you know you think so!â You open the basement door and motion for Jonathan to go down first.Â
When he reaches the bottom of the steps, Jonathan makes a face. âWoah, whatâs that smell? Have you guys been playing games all day, or just farting?â
âMy vote is farting.â You say, hopping down the last step. Your ankle has mostly healed by now, but sometimes if you land on it wrong it makes a weird clicking noise followed by some pain, but you choose to pretend that itâs normal.Â
The boys laugh and Lucas points at your brother. âOh, thatâs just Dustin. He farted.â
He begins making fart noises with his mouth and you and Dustin share a look. âVery mature, Lucas.â
The boy continues to sing and make fart noises and you canât believe that this is your life. Youâre standing in a smelly basement while picking up your stubborn brother all while simultaneously enjoying the fact that you get to call this your life.Â
Jonathan calls over to Will to grab his things, so you follow suit and gently berate Lucas. âAlright, thatâs enough. I gotta get Dustin home.â
âWhat, I thought I got to stayââ
âJonathan is our ride and I made cookies, so letâs go.â
The moment the word âcookiesâ leaves your mouth, Dustin hops up and collects his things without any further argument.Â
Once heâs ready, he and Lucas play wrestle as they say goodbye. While theyâre distracted, you walk over to Mike and discreetly hand him a container full of double fudge brownies. Youâd specifically made them for him, knowing they were his favorite, because you noticed how hard itâs been for him to adjust to El being gone. He really cared about her, anyone could see that.Â
Mikeâs eyes widen and he throws his arms around you. âThanks, Y/N.â
You pat his back. âAnytime, Wheeler.â
Dustin breaks away from Lucas and runs up the stairs, so you take that as your cue to leave.Â
Upstairs, Jonathan and Will are talking to Mrs. Wheeler. When they see you enter, the woman turns to you and asks if youâll be bringing over your usual round of holiday treats. âOf course, Iâll get started on them tomorrow. You guys still like the sugar cookies?â
âIf you make them, I think Iâll die of happiness.â Mrs. Wheeler informs you, and you laugh and tell her that youâll have them ready as soon as possible.Â
You bid her goodbye, Dustin now by your side, and you follow Jonathan and Will to the front door. Right before you open the door, Nancy calls Jonathanâs name from the top of the stairs.Â
âHey, Jonathan, wait up!âÂ
You, Dustin, and Will stand awkwardly in the back while Nancy hands Jonathan a wrapped gift and wishes him a merry Christmas. They share an awkward exchange since Jonathan hadnât gotten her anything, but Nancy assures him that itâs fine. The interaction is painful to watch as Nancy doesnât spare you a single glance. Dustin and Will look at you uncertainly when she kisses Jonathanâs cheek, but you ignore them and pretend to be interested in a Christmas decoration on the table.
This will never get any easier.Â
âYou ready?â Jonathan turns back to you guys, a blush on his face, and all you can do is silently nod.Â
In the car you sit in the back with Dustin, who squeezes your arm in reassurance. Heâs come to understand your complex feelings for Jonathan and has pieced together Nancyâs involvement. While heâs never outright consoled you, heâs shown his support in other small and wonderful ways.Â
âThanks,â you whisper, and Dustin smiles.Â
âWe all buckled up?â Jonathan asks as he starts up the car.Â
âYes, captain.â You mock salute.Â
Will giggles at you before he sees the gift and looks up at Jonathan. âCan I open it?â
âYeah, sure.âÂ
You and Dustin lean forward so you can see whatâs in the box. When Will unwraps a beautiful, and no doubt expensive, camera, you gasp. The bitterness and hurt from moments ago vanishes. This gift is from Steve, you know it is, and something warm settles deep within your bones.Â
You think about last month, how youâd told him not everyone can just afford a camera.Â
Seems like Steve listened.Â
Maybe he isnât so bad after all.Â
âÂ
A week later you knock on the Byersâ door, a giant container of your annual holiday cookies in your arms.Â
âBug!â Jonathan answers the door with an excited smile on his face. His new camera is in his hands and before you can even process whatâs happening, heâs already taken a photo of you with your crooked earmuffs and oversized box of cookies.
Heâs been using the camera ever since he got it. Thereâs now multiple pictures of you, always unaware or caught off guard, now hanging in the kitchen. It makes you blush to think about.Â
âYou didnât even give me a chance to smile.â You complain, shoving your way inside. Itâs snowing and youâre freezing.Â
Joyce grabs the container to help you as soon as she sees you. âHere, honey. Iâve got it.â
You thank her and walk over to Will, who is drawing at the kitchen table. âHey little bee. Whatcha drawing?â
âHi, Y/N.â He slides over his picture and youâre shown a quick sketch of you and the party, this time fighting what appears to be a misshapen dog. âItâs a Dire Wolf, weâre fighting it in our latest campaign.â
âAh, I see. Looks fluffy, though. Canât possibly be a dangerous creature.â
Will rolls his eyes at you. âThis is why you donât play with us.â
âCareful, youâre sassing the girl who has just bravely ridden her bike through the snow to deliver her famous Christmas cookies.â
Will is out of his seat in an instant, running over to his mom, who has just placed the container on the counter. âDid you make the oatmeal raisin cookies?â
âDuh,â you snort.Â
âAnd the chocolate chip?â
âI sure did.â You stand next to him and point at a new cookie youâre trying out this year. âThis batch is a caramel banana one. Steve seemed to like it and I think itâs pretty good, so I hope you do too.â
Jonathan swoops over and kisses your head. âOf course weâll like it, bug.â
âHeâs right, you know. We always love whatever you make us, honey.â Joyce informs you, her mouth now full of cookies.Â
âIâd hope so, this is like my fifth year making these for you guys. Itâd be awkward if you hated my baking.â You say, now securing your earmuffs back on your head. âAnyways, I should get going. Itâs Christmas, my mom wonât want me out too long.âÂ
Joyce looks out the window and frowns. âDid you really bike here in this weather?â
âIt wasnât too bad, Iâll be fineââ
âNo. Jonathan, grab your keys and drive Y/N home.â She stares you down, daring you to argue with her, but you donât. You know better than to argue with Joyce Byers.Â
Once Jonathan has his keys, you say goodbye to everyone and wish them a merry Christmas. Jonathan throws your bike in his trunk and soon youâre off on the road. The drive is quiet but cozy. The snowflakes fall in a pretty spiral and thereâs a soft song playing on the radio.Â
Sometimes, if you close your eyes, you can pretend that the events from last month never happened. Will never disappeared. You never discovered that you love Jonathan. Nancy Wheeler never became friends with Jonathan, possibly something more had there been more time. When you close your eyes and sit still, you can imagine that your brother never has nightmares that wake him up screaming. That your heart doesnât hurt when you make your best friend laugh.Â
For a moment, you can forget.Â
âCan we always stay like this?â You ask Jonathan softly, almost as if youâll disturb the peace that winter has brought with its quiet snow.Â
âLike what?â
Youâre not sure how to express what youâre feeling. âThis, us. Together.â
âOf course weâll always stay like this.â He grabs your hand, bringing it to his lips to kiss it. He says this like itâs a fact, the most obvious thing in the world.Â
âPinky promise me.â You hold your pinky up. You know itâs silly, but you need him to hear you, to understand what youâre saying.
Jonathan looks over at you. âY/Nââ
âPlease, promise me, bee.â
Heâs silent for a moment, seeming to understand the weight of everything between, around, and within the two of you. Then, he extends his pinky finger and wraps it around yours. âI promise, bug.âÂ
And you believe him.
[END OF SEASON ONE]
-
â series masterlist
â if youd like to buy me a coffee âď¸
â thank you for reading ! feel free to like, comment, reblog, or send in an ask so we can chat <3
#steve harrington x henderson!reader#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington x you#stranger things#steve harrington fanfic#stranger things rewrite#slowburn#angst#wdtai#m's writing#im so tired n happy and full of love for u all#cannot believe its done :')#pls pls pls enjoy <333
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dating isaac & yumi hc's? đđ
dating isaac & yumi hcs
chill chaos. like they go from chilling in your room one minute to yelling because something got them in a mood to debate
these two are genuinely really smart but when you put them together they are. so fucking stupid
you try to keep them on task if they need to do smth but it always ends in you guys doing literally nothing productive
the two tall boys of tgc. isaac and blake are both over six foot so there's probably a height difference going on here
cuddles. blake is less cuddly but loves it anyways. he won't usually go out of his way to cuddle but he's so down if you initiate it
isaac on the other hand BEGS to cuddle. comes in your room like "baby can we lay in bed and watch tiktoks :("
sometimes blake walks in on a cuddle sesh and just casually joins without saying a word
other times it starts as them both cuddling you and then somehow they're cuddling each other? neither of them say a word abt it
literally they both eat so much. you wonder how their combined doordash spending hasn't put them in debt (they are both dashpass members)
sitting in one of their rooms and they just go 'oh hey i ordered us food' like ??? okay sure
when it's the three of you the feasts are legendary. literally nothing goes to waste because they have an innate ability to smash food like it's nobody's business
so they both like quality time and physical affection but their TRUE love language as a poly couple is gift giving but it's just food giving
the munchies are insane
if it's your thing, the three of you get high together quite frequently. it's nothing too much but you just have some edibles that either isaac or blake bought and chill
although none of you are really vloggers there's constant content on your ig stories of each other doing random shit
every few months you and isaac fill some random part of blake's room with plastic balls. it's tradition
if you choose to be in your gym arc you have a bf for it. if you choose to be in your lazy arc you have a bf for it. perfect halves
dinner dates are most common but also they do like a good clothes shopping trip. it's mostly isaac but
blake likes to take you (and isaac) to obscure places he finds in town. abandoned malls, petting zoos, cat cafes, you name it
they are also both amazon impulse buyers. both blake and isaac will randomly come to your room with a giant box and it's some random shit like a barbie dreamhouse
both of them like when you play with their hair. you sometimes nag isaac about getting his hair cut but it's fun when it's long
you tell blake not to cut his hair and when he inevitably does you and isaac both clown on him for looking like an idiot
the group chat of you three consists of some strange memes and tiktoks. there's not really an explanation to them they just send em
you have seen them actively get into an argument about who wants to go out and get your morning coffee shop order more. like it's a competition or smth
both like to surprise you with things but are terrible at hiding it
blake streams on twitch and you and isaac just chill in the call with him while he games and yells at shit
you both fuel chat and get him upset because you run channel point predictions as to whether he dies or not
they're great bfs.
I LOVED THIS like they're my second favorite i think for poly ships. i hope you like it :D
#isaacwhy#isaacwhy x reader#yumi#yumimain#yumi x reader#tgc#tgc x reader#the group#the group x reader#the group chat#softwilly#bigt#larry croft#headcanons#poly tgc
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Hello, you said in some tags in a poll that Speed Racer (2008) is your favorite film. If youâre okay with it, Iâd really like to hear more about why you love it. I love the Wachowskisâ work (theyâre among my favorite directors), but I kinda ended up bouncing off Speed Racer (2008). So, hearing that it had a real impact on someone makes me very curious why. Iâm not interested in criticizing your opinion or arguing with you, Iâd just really like to know why you love it in the hopes I might be able to enjoy that movie more in the future.
oh god this is from seven months ago, I'm so sorry - but I do love almost everything about Speed Racer (2008) and I still think about it nearly every day.
I love that it's so bright and colorful and absurd. I love that it's an anime in live action form. and I love that at its heart, it is a story about love.
it's about the mistakes people make out of love, and the consequences of that. it's about the way children grow to understand why the adults around them make the choices they do, and maybe choose to do the same things. it's about taking risks for the people you love, and the pain of failing to change the world, because everything is capitalism and everything hurts.
(and it's also about being transgender btw. like, that's one of the main things about it - it is very much a movie about being transgender)
what if your father's choices hurt your older brother, and your older brother's choices hurt you, and now it's you and your younger brother staring down a future where you're going to end up hurting him by making the same choice?
and then...what if you can escape that? what if the broken parts put themselves back together, and the hope doesn't run out, and you're not alone with the things that haunt you? what then?
and now you're at the end and mistakes were still made, people were still hurt, but everyone's grown and changed and they're different now. and they've figured out that maybe, just maybe, you can change the world by doing something you love, by creating art and beauty and making people feel things.
maybe you really can defeat capitalism by driving a car really fast. and even if everyone thinks you can't...don't you have to try anyway? shouldn't you fight with the skills you have, the only way you know how?
what if it works?
and I'm not even gonna get into most of the Racer X stuff (because I want people to go watch this movie, and most folks probably won't be spoiled for it), but his whole deal is just...everything. I love him.
(if there's a guy from Speed Racer that I want to put in a jar and shake every so often, or maybe wrap in a blanket so he can have a nice nap, it's Racer X. he's a great character. prime blorbo material)
anyway I've been rotating this movie in my head ever since I saw it for the first time, and I think I've seen it...seven? times now? and I still cry at the final race, and I still get blown away by the intro sequence.
(the beginning of the movie is genuinely one of the best things I've ever seen - it does an amazing job of introducing you to the world and the story of the characters, and gets you emotionally invested in it right from the start. it's fantastic filmmaking)
also like. story stuff aside, from a technical standpoint, the movie is a masterpiece. it's the type of thing that people hated when it first came out, but when you look at it now and see how it was made, how it intentionally looks bizarre and cartoonish, plastic and surreal, you can see the exact vision the Wachowskis were going for, and it's brilliant.
the way they did the visual effects, the way they made the outdoor scenes feel so detailed, the way the driving and the tracks work - they put so much thought into that, and the behind-the-scenes vids show how cool their process was.
also uhhh cars go vroom, crash into each other, flip upside down, explode, maybe have bees and hammers in them sometimes?
(the above is me complimenting the unhinged vibe of the races themselves, which I love very much)
anyway I could make other full posts about the script of the film and how much I love it, or the cool side characters, or the fanfic potential of the amazing world of the film, or how I can prove that it's set in 1991...but I guess if anyone wants those rants, they'll just have to watch the film and then come talk to me. :)
(please. please come talk to me about Speed Racer.)
so, yeah! I kinda lost my mind there and made this post way longer than I intended, but I do feel strongly affected by this movie, and I hope this has helped explain why.
#asks#crescentwench#speed racer#speed racer (2008)#speed racer 2008#the wachowskis#my beloved#also it's important for anyone who hasn't seen the movie or cartoon to know#the main guy. his name is Speed Racer#first name Speed last name Racer#also the movie has vague found family vibes because Sparky and Trixie are here and are a part of this family#don't worry about it. they belong here#and so does chim-chim#he's their youngest child#and also a chimpanzee#sbs rambles#long post
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(TW: grooming) So, I once had a couple of people from my wof disc, not going to list any names or something for their privacy... they usually don't talk about wof most of the time. But when they feel like they want to, they would go onto the wof channels and just... whine.
Like, literally. They cry like toddlers over a kids book series. Something like, "WAAAAAH I HATE THIS CHARACTER WAAAAAAH I HOPE THEY DIE" and they literally attack any people who would tell them to calm down or disagrees with any of their opinions đ
One of their opinions is that they hate peril, and worship scarlet. Like, I get it, Scarlet's a great villain, and she's iconic, but it's not like I support ANY of her actions whatsoever! These people are like "boohoo we don't care that your adoptive parent feeds you black rocks everyday" whenever peril is genuinely having a hard time.
And then they would praise her when she's manipulating peril and telling her she's a monster and nobody likes her. Like, I love scarlet but I do NOT support any of her actions at all. Yeah lets praise this grown ass woman for grooming a minor into thinking she's a monster and nobody likes her because we all hate said minor anyway!!! (I don't think I remember that somewhere, but I do recall that in the disc)
These people's reasoning for hating peril is that she's killed a lot of innocent dragons (even though she REGRETS that later in her book. I think these people have zero media literacy or something), and that she's too "obsessive" over clay. Idk if this ever happened but I think she learns to not be too obsessive somewhere in this series idk I haven't read it in a long time.
I think they just hate wings of fire in general and like to complain about how "bad" it is because they hate most of the characters just for breathing oxygen or something. They also hate anemone just for her general bratty behavior in the second arc. I do agree that this sudden personality change was uncalled for and that it should have build up in the previous arc, but she was a TODDLER that was groomed into a war weapon, has to have a harness so she can follow her mother literally everywhere, and was arranged a marriage with a OLD MAN at one point, and was a child abuse victim at one point. (note how most of these "hated characters" are pretty much groom victims) Yeah no wonder why she was very bratty!
Anyways, to sum this up, I have NO IDEA why these people are talking about hating wings of fire in general. If you hate it SO much, then why don't you stop talking about it?? Why are you complaining about it KIDS series in the first place? It's not like it killed your grandma or anything. And the fact that you also HATE most characters that were GROOMED into what you hate the most about them and worshipping their groomers in general. Just stop talking about it and go find something ELSE that is worth your time instead of wasting your life away crying about a kids series.
Oh, yeah, and also when they are not talking about wings of fire... they constantly make birth jokes, and it makes me uncomfortable and icky đ¤˘đ¤Ž Thankfully, they're not around in my disc anymore for the moment. Sorry for sending this essay-long ask, if you don't mind.
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Phan Fic Recs #3!!
here is the requested long fic list! these are all 100k+, not all of them are finished (i didn't put any on here that aren't actively updating tho) and all of them are SO good so i hope you enjoy :)
Silver Arrows To The Heart by @evermorepeyton (137k WIP)- this one is a duplicate from the other list but there might be a few on here, ignore that<3 anyway this fic is AMAZING!!! dan and phil formula 1 drivers au- they're both on Mercedes and lots of awesome teammates to lovers hijinks ensue<3 this one gets a special shoutout for having some fantastic female characters (who are dare i say just as intriguing as dnp themselves?) and also bc the author is a beautiful human who i love<3 a super fun fic and very in character for both of them (somehow lmao, you wouldnt expect it with racecar drivers but somehow it works so well)
dancing on the blades (you set my heart on fire) by kishere (123k)- imagine all the 2009 phan lore but if dan and phil were figure skaters. yep, it's a yuri on ice au where dan scores a spot in the famous Lester training gym and meets phil, who is one of the most well known figure skaters in england<3 fantastic fantastic fic, such perfect vibes and lots of great lester family cameos<3
Strictly Come Dancing but make it GAY! by @natigail (176k)- the final duplicate from the medium list<3 this fic is AMAZING!!!! this is the one that got me back into phanfic in general afterhaving not read any for about 6 years, it's a strictly come dancing au where phil is a hot pro dancer and dan is a celebrity/gay activist, and they accidentally become the first gay couple to compete in scd<3 FANTASTIC outfit and dance descriptions, i listened to all the songs while reading it and it was honestly so lovely i felt like i could see it so clearly<3 also- the lore references are AMAZING lol i felt like a pro every time i found a little easter egg. amazing fic, i HIGHLY recommend it<3
A Semester Abroad by @everything-is-as-it-was (162k WIP)- this one is really fun!! lots of domestic phouse vibes as it is about an american college student who gets stranded in England after a study abroad housing situation falls through and who gets accidentally taken in by these two random british guys with a REALLY weird house... sooo funny, it's really quite cute and i highly recommend giving it a read! I love outsider pov and this has an abundance of funny moments because dnp are Weird
Broke, Gay and New in Town by @natigail (347k)- do you want the softest, cutest, most magical and compelling story to ever exist??? literally look no further because right here is the dan and phil stardew valley au and it is SO CUTE!!! dan inherits a farm from his grandfather and decides to ditch his boring life to go and run it, and he has so many adventures along the way. oh yeah phil is there too and hes SO CUTE and they fall in love :3 seriously so cute, also you don't need stardew valley knowledge to enjoy this it is independently perfect (i have never played the game and actually learned what it was From this fic so ur good lol)
linger on by dizzy, waveydnp (184k)- this one is so so so sweet... non youtuber au where 33yo phil has been living with his parents, but when his dad dies his mom decides to sell the house and phil has to find somewhere new to live. so ofc he becomes roommates with some guy called dan, and ummm they fall in love? honestly they are SO perfect in this fic, i adore it<3 highly recommend
L'Histoire Française by danfanciesphil (105k)- suuuuper fun teachers au! phil is a history professor and dan is his TA. this fic is SO FUN!!!! genuinely adore it lol, it's one of the first phan fics i ever read and it has stayed with me forever<3
So Many Stars by transdimensional_void (152k)- another teachers au :) dnp meet when they both become english teachers at a school in japan and this is VERY cute <3
okay there's the list!! sorry this one is shorter than the others haha, there are too few long fics in the phandom :( but all of these are so so lovely and i hope you enjoy! lol some distractions may be needed during these trying times <3
#dan and phil#phan#dnp#phandom#dip and pip#phil lester#dan howell#dnpg#dapg#dan and phil games#phanfiction#phan fiction
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