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jujutsubaby · 7 months

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after hours (part 8)

☆ pairing: toji fushiguro x afab!reader ☆ summary: you help toji bake brownies for megumi's soccer meet tomorrow! you're excited to spend a cute and wholesome night in with baking brownies and eating taco bell with toji but he has something different in mind... ☆ tags: modern au, babysitting au ☆ warnings: 18+ !! MINORS DNI !! oral (f! and m! recieving), penetrative sex (p in the v), smoking, overstimulation, cannabis use, rough sex ☆ a/n: GUYS MORE CRAZY FILTHY SMUT IS HERE FOR U!! enjoy luvs!! and also enjoy even more taco bell sponsorship~ next post will be gojo centered and will still have some smut so stay tuned!! im feeling a little less shy writing smut but i still have a lot of ways to go before writing the infamous 3way but so far im feeling good ab this series and still feeling the momentum >:) also toji is soooo goofy and dilfy i love him :( 🖤🤍 series masterlist 🤍🖤

by the time toji comes downstairs from putting megumi to sleep, you’re already measuring out flour and beating eggs for the brownies as a form of distraction from your horny thoughts. you give a quick wry smile to toji before going back to beating the eggs. you feel and hear toji’s footsteps creaking until they’re in the kitchen, and eventually, right behind you. his arms snake between your hips and you let out a gasp, despite knowing what he’s up to. toji pulls himself closer to you and nuzzles his head between you neck and shoulders, and you instinctively roll your neck to the side, allowing him full access to one of the most sensitive parts of your body.

you close your eyes in pleasure as toji peppers small kisses on your neck and shoulder blade, causing you to breathe heavier. “toji~ we need to bake megumi’s brownies,” you whine, trying to focus your energy back on beating the eggs again.

“right, the brownies…” toji mumbles into ear, causing you to shiver. he continues to leave tiny kisses throughout your neck before finally stopping and resting his head in the crook of your neck. there’s a brief moment of companionable silence with him, where the only sounds were the beating of the eggs, the cicadas outside, and the hum of the heater.

toji breaks the silence first. “so…how was your night last night?” he feels your body get rigid almost immediately and starts rubbing your shoulders. “don’t get nervous, i’m only asking because i’m genuinely interested, pumpkin. not everything about me is horny.”

“yeah, right!” you scoff, remembering the stunt he pulled at target earlier today. “seems like you already know how my night went, anyway.” you roll your eyes as you playfully shrug toji off your neck and he chuckles.

“that’s just the last part of the night, i wanna know how your night in general was, jeez…” toji teases as he measures out the dry goods for the brownies. you figure toji is being genuine, and you have no reason to believe he isn’t. plus, you aren’t that bothered by him eavesdropping on your steamy encounter with satoru last night – you don’t want to admit it but you find it extremely hot, in fact.

you sigh and start telling toji about your night, from taking the gummy shoko gave you to getting kicked out of playing dance dance revolution. you omit most of the sexual tension of the night with satoru, but you figure toji can just figure that part out by himself.

toji has an amused face by the end of your story. “wow, so this is what happens when daddy doesn’t respond to your text fast enough, huh. to think i could’ve taken care of you much better than-”

you hit him playfully in the arm before he can finish the sentence. the last thing you need in your head is satoru and toji both arguing with each other about who can satisfy you better. you’d love to bookmark that fantasy for later, though. maybe in your bed, with your vibrator.

“shut up!” you pour the wet mix into the dry one and start mixing the brownie mix slowly as you both chuckle.

“i didn’t know you got high.” toji seems intrigued.

you continue mixing. “yeah, i mean, sometimes i do. i guess we haven’t really ever...hung out like that. i mean, it’s kinda bad form to show up to work intoxicated, no?” you joke, thinking about how insane you have to be on something while babysitting a child.

“how many times do i have to say this? cut the shit, y/n, it’s literally just babysitting.” toji rolls his eyes. “you can be so tightly wound up, sometimes…” toji moves behind you again, and starts rubbing your shoulders lightly. you hate to admit it, but jesus that feels so good.

“still! i can’t be on some shit while with megumi…” you say, defending yourself but slowly losing your rigor as toji really hits a knot on your shoulder that involuntarily makes you let out a moan. oh, fuck. you can practically feel the smile grow on his face as he hits the spot again. you bite your lip this time to hold in the moan.

“well, you’re not with megumi, right now, right?” you’ve long stopped mixing the brownie mix, and you turn your head to face toji, meeting him just inches away from his lips. you suck in a breath.

“i guess not…what are you trying to say?” you boldly ask, your eyes not leaving his lips.

“i’m trying to say…” toji brings his lips even closer to you. “it’s probably gonna be easier for us to finish our cold ass taco bell if we smoke a little joint together in the backyard, pumpkin.” you answer him by pressing your lips to his, initiating a deep kiss between the two of you.

“i’m taking that as a yes,” toji says, in between kisses. he pulls you closer, and you turn yourself around and lock your arms over his neck, pulling him even closer to you as you respond by moaning into his lips. toji breaks off the kiss, chuckling at your frown. “patience, pumpkin…” he coos as he opens up a random cabinet in the kitchen and pulls out a ziploc baggie of a couple joints. he takes one out, grabs a lighter from a drawer with one hand, and your hand in the other and guides you to the backyard right outside. he lights it up and takes the first drag from it, and exhales. ugh, why does he look sooo hot while smoking? it’s unfair.

if you were this horny completely sober, you’re fucked for the night. despite knowing this, you accept the joint from toji and take a hit, letting the smoke lightly irritate your lungs before letting it all go. you really did try to play it as cool as toji when you exhaled, but you ended up coughing. heat rushes to your face as you feel toji patting your back and chuckling.

“stop, this normally doesn’t happen, okay,” you plead between coughs. “i just don’t smoke that much.” another embarrassing cough at the end of it.

“whatever you say, pumpkin.” toji coos as he continues to effortlessly smoke the joint with zero coughs. it makes you jealous how perfect he looks in the pale moonlight, blowing smoke out. his face relaxes with each puff, as does yours, as you both slowly lean into the buzzed feeling.

after a couple minutes of passing the joint to one another in silence, toji extinguishes it by slowly knocking it against the outdoor table. back inside the kitchen, there’s still the brownies that need to be put inside the already pre-heated oven.

“okay, how about you heat up the food, and i put the brownies in the oven?” you instruct toji as you carefully transfer the brownie mix into the tray. you’re definitely high right now, but you just have to use your brain for like, 3 more minutes, before you can turn it off and enjoy the night with toji, who’s currently heating up your dinner. he grabs the tray from you before you can pick it up.

“i’ll put it inside the oven, don’t want you to get burned handling the oven while a lil stoned. just open it and take a seat.” he instructs, head gesturing to the oven. it makes your heart skip a beat as you do what he says. you wait patiently as toji brings out the food, admiring his large and built physique. has he gotten even bigger since the last time you saw him? maybe you should ask if he wants to help you work out even though you can’t remember the last time you stepped foot inside the gym. you gulp and force yourself to think of something else, and the waft of the taco bell easily melts away your horny thoughts as the munchies slowly start to kick in for you.

you immediately start destroying your food, as toji grabs the remote to turn on…great british bakeoff? you didn’t know toji was into food television, and now that you think of it, food related tv shows are usually the most family friendly ones, too. toji senses your confusion and clears the air.

“listen, it’s interesting, okay?” he says, defensively as he chows down on his tacos, eyes not leaving the screen as paul hollywood explains the technical challenge.

“i’m not judging!” you’re judging a little bit. “i think it’s cute you’re into such soft dilfy tv shows…” you giggle.

“what makes ‘great british bakeoff’ dilfy?”

“i dunno, it’s just a dad thing to watch.” you say in between bites.

the rest of your dinner consists of conversations around toji’s tv show interests (he watches a lot of hgtv and a weird common ground between the two of you is selling sunset) and the current episode of great british bakeoff (you feel bad even offering to bake brownies after watching their baking skills).

you laugh when toji says he hated the time he went traveling to london (“i didn’t understand a single thing they said and their seafood is just awful!”). “you can’t judge them just by a single bad trip, toji,” you chastise, rolling your eyes. you take a bite out of a cinnabon delight and the cream oozes out around your lips. you’re about to quickly wipe it off, when you catch toji looking intently at you.

“hold on, let me help.” he wastes no time leaning towards you, suddenly forgetting about the tv show, and licks it off your mouth and you’re not sure when you both start kissing but you were. it seemed so natural to fall into it, cinnabon in one hand and your other tugging on his hair.

“you taste like cinnabons,” toji murmurs against your lips.

you let out a small moan, “it’s because i was eating one…until….” the sound of the tv drown out the smacks of your lips and your quiet moans.

“sorry, should i stop?” toji breaks the kiss and tugs on your lower lip playfully, and you moan due to the loss of contact. your hand, still resting on his head, forces him back on your lips as you hungrily open your mouth and let his tongue explore yours.

you’re about to say more but, but you’re both interrupted by the timer going off in the kitchen, indicating the brownies are finished. the sound startles both of you and toji breaks off the kiss as you catch your breath. you both get up, the high slowly plateauing for the both of you since getting some food in your stomachs. toji carefully takes out the freshly baked and hot brownies and places them on the granite countertop.

“god, they smell so good…” you say, practically salivating.

“i know they’re for megs, but…i mean, it wouldn’t hurt if we just ate one, right?” toji surmises, already grabbing a knife and slicing off two small pieces for the both of you.

“yeah, they won’t even notice.” you’re about to eat your brownie piece, when toji stops you.

“wait, got somethin’ that’s gonna make this even better.” he strides over to the fridge and pulls out a can of whipped cream. “we can have fun with this.”

you know he doesn’t mean it in a sexual way (or does he?) but you definitely read more into it, your heart beating faster thinking of all the dirty things you can do with the whipped cream, but first, your brain is begging you to try just a bite of the brownie before giving into your horny thoughts. you watch toji swirl a bit of whipped cream on his brownie before handing the can to you. you match him, albeit, a bit more messily. the whipped cream gets on your hands and on the plate, but you pay no mind to it as you both inhale the brownie bite at the same time.

you do a terrible job at holding back a moan at the sweet fudgy and warm bite. “oh my god…not to toot my own horn but these are the best brownies i’ve ever had.” you say with your mouthful and toji nods in agreement.

“megs is gonna love this tomorrow morning but he’s gonna hate us for trying a bite without him,” toji jokes. immediately after finishing his brownie, he grabs your whipped cream-laced finger and brings it to his mouth and starts sucking on it, causing you to gasp. he licks the whipped cream clean, and kisses the tips of your fingers.

“someone’s still hungry for something sweet,” you tease, grabbing the can of whipped cream, opening your mouth, and spraying some on your tongue. you stand on your tippy toes and toji leans down and gives you an open mouth kiss. his tongue engulfs yours and exchanges the whipped cream between both of your mouths, the sweetness driving your hunger for him even more. if you saw anyone else do this, it would make you gag, but with toji, you cannot deny how erotic it is and how incredibly soaked you are. the sweetest kiss (literally) you’ve ever had comes to an end as toji pulls back and grabs the whipped cream container.

“actually…” toji lifts you up with one arm and sets on top of the granite countertop of his kitchen. “i want something sweeter…” he brings the nozzle to your neck, which you gladly tilt for him to make space, and you feel the coldness of the whipped cream being applied on your neck. jesus fucking christ, you’re so sensitive there. you shiver at the contact. your eyes roll so far back in your head and you let out the most obscene moan when toji licks a long stripe across the whipped cream in your neck, and sucks on your skin at the end of it. you feel the vibrations of toji’s humming against your neck and you close your eyes in pleasure.

“f-fuck~ toji…m’so sensitive there…when you lick it, ah~” toji wastes no time placing some more whipped cream on your neck and repeating the same motion as you moan again at the contact of his tongue on your neck.

“fuck, pumpkin, i could just eat you up, right now,” toji says through raspy sighs. he’s practically inhaling you – your warmth, your scent, everything. he can’t get enough of you, with or without whipped cream. with or without clothes, too but preferably without. “gotta take this off,” toji says, tugging at the hem of your sweater.

“yes, daddy,” you say coyly as you bite your lip. you waste no time throwing the sweatshirt somewhere across the kitchen. you sit on the granite counter with your titties on full display, your nipples slowly getting harder by the second.

“tsk, no bra?” toji immediately connects his lips to your collarbones as he covers you in small open mouthed kisses until he reaches your sternum and feels your chest moving with your heavy breaths. your knuckles are turning white gripping the edges of the countertop. “you’re such a fuckin’ slut showing up here without one…what did you expect to happen?” he teases you even further as he starts kissing lightly your mounds.

your breath gets caught in your throat as you pathetically try to defend your decision to not wear a bra tonight. “i-i- toji~ y-you said y-you would cook for me and t-take care of me…” you’re looking down at him and he looks back up at you. you close the gap between your mouths as you engulf him in another kiss and wrap your legs around him, unapologetically bringing him even closer to you. you scoot yourself even closer to the edge of the granite counter so that your heat was as close as it could get to him without you falling off the countertop and you start grinding on him, desperate to feel something.

with the whipped cream can still in his hand, toji breaks off the kiss, and you notice a string of saliva connecting you both. “patience, pumpkin…” he mumbles as he shakes the can. he sprays two little buttons of whipped cream on each of your nipples, which are both hard right now, and it makes you shiver viscerally. toji engulfs one of your cream covered buds and starts sucking messily, causing you to whimper embarrassingly loudly. thank god the tv noise is drowning out your noises.

once he’s cleaned up one of your breasts, he moves on to the next one, expertly using his tongue in quick flicks against your hardened bud. you feel like your skin is on fire despite the cream being cold and you lightly tug on toji’s hair, pressing his face even closer to your breasts. it’s harder to keep your eyes open because of the pleasure that’s electrifying your body, and your moans are slowly filling up the room.

“fuck, y’taste so sweet…” toji says in between kissing your titties, alternating between each one and making sure not a single smear of cream was left. “can’t believe this is what i missed out on…”

“p-please, toji~” you whine, “n-need more of you…” you’re not one to be insistent, but you find your hands on toji’s shoulders and they’re slowly pushing him down to face your soaked shorts.

“need my tongue in your pussy? need daddy to take care of this pretty perfect pussy?” toji teases you by grazing his thumb over your clothed clit, making you involuntarily flinch and whimper. tears of desperation threaten to spill as you quickly nod your head and mouth a weak “please”.

“take this off.” toji commands, his fingers playing with the waistband of your shorts. he doesn’t have to ask you twice as your shorts practically slide off of you. your ass hits the cold granite and you yelp, but not for long as toji swiftly picks you up and lays you down on the dining room table. your legs automatically spread open wide as he takes a seat on the dining chair and comes face to face to your unclothed soaking core. you hear toji swear under his breath as his pupils dilate at the sight of you completely bare for him on his dining table.

you won’t lie – you feel extremely exposed compared to toji who’s completely clothed, but it just turns you on even more at how desperate you get for him to touch you. you’re so needy for his touch, his tongue, his fingers, everything. and just thinking about it makes your wetness drip on his dining table. your eyes roll back so far, you arch your back in pleasure from just feeling toji’s hot breath in your inner thigh.

“p-please, toji~ no teasing…i can’t stand it~” you cry, bucking your hips closer to toji’s face. you need his mouth on you so bad it’s making you go insane as you hyperventilate and blink back tears.

your eyes are facing the ceiling, but you feel toji shaking the whipped cream can. before you realize what’s happening, toji’s spraying another button of cold cream on your clit, and temperature causes your body to twitch. toji’s hands grab each side of your hips to hold them still, effectively forcing your legs to stay open while he finally dines on the dessert he’s been waiting all night for.

toji licks a long strip across your folds, until he reaches your bundle of nerves and rests below a small hill of cream. the cream mixes into your core, and toji eats it up like he’s never had anything sweeter (and he hasn’t). your wanton moans get louder and louder as he dives even deeper into your core, his tongue expertly not leaving any cream to waste.

“if you’re gonna be this loud, pumpkin, m’gonna gag you so shut the fuck up.” …was that supposed to be a threat to you? in any case, you bite your lips to stop block your moans, letting out raspy whimpers at toji’s ministrations. you feel toji’s fingers slowly creeping near your entrance and you buckle your hips futilely against his arms holding you down, in an effort to beg for more.

toji inserts one, maybe two, you’re not sure how many fingers are inside you by the time you feel the coil tightening in your lower abdomen. your mind, already high from before, turns into mush in the face of your rising heart rate. toji hears your whimpers getting louder and your pussy clenching around his curled fingers bullying your g-spot.

“t-toji~ m’getting close…” you say through mangled moans. tears threaten to spill as you strain to hold back until toji gives you permission. “can-can i, please?”

“can you what? use your words, pumpkin…” toji says, speeding up his fingers inside you.

“can-can i cum, please, toji~” you whine.

“anything for you, pumpkin. cum your brains out…” toji uses his thumb to apply the final pressure to your bundle of nerves, causing you to come undone on his fingers, and making a mess on his dining table. you don’t even have time to feel bad about it because toji starts bullying your g-spot again, leaving no time for you to recover.

he swiftly stands up, and you feel the tent in his sweats against your thigh as he reaches over to cover your mouth. you feel the back of your head pressing against the hard dining room table, but it does an effective job of mumbling your scream at the overstimulation toji was giving to your pussy. your eyes roll back as he uses his thumb again to circle your clit and apply pressure. the tears you tried to hold back this entire time stream down your cheeks as you feel your body on fire after not recovering from your first orgasm. you see toji’s cruel smile as he coos at how well you take his fingers.

“ohh, i know it’s a lot, pumpkin, but i know you can give me a second one, maybe even a third?” your eyes widen at the thought of three consecutive orgasms – you’ve never been able to do that even on your own! toji chuckles mockingly, his hands tightening around your mouth even more as he feels the signature clenching of your pussy on his fingers. he knows you're close and so do you.

“cum for me, i know you're close, don’t hold back for me.” and you don’t. if his hand wasn’t on your mouth, you’re sure the neighbors and megumi, and maybe everyone in the neighborhood would have woken up at how drawn out your scream was.

you’re unable to form a coherent thought as toji continues to keep his fingers inside you, caressing your g-spot and keeping up his end of his promise of making you cum three times in a row. it’s embarrassing how fast you cum the third time – it’s almost immediately and you feel yourself making a complete wet mess everywhere as your legs shake even though toji removed his fingers from you.

toji unclamps your mouth and your breathy moans start back up again as you watch him put his soaked fingers in his mouth. “wanna taste y’self, pumpkin…so sweet…” you pathetically nod your head as toji inserts his fingers inside your mouth and you start sucking involuntarily, tasting yourself on him. he pushes his fingers deeper in you, but you hold them back.

“want to taste you…toji, wanna suck you off…” you whine, wishing desperately his fingers were something else.

“soon, not finished with your pussy yet.” toji takes his shirt off, and you lift your head up to admire his body. his toned and chiseled abs have a thin layer of sheen from concentrating on making you cum. you bite your lip and make eye contact with him, as he reaches down and palms his rock hard member over his sweats. you feel your mouth water in anticipation of having it in your mouth, but toji has different plans.

toji lowers the waistband of his short and underwear, and his throbbing member springs up. with one hand, toji starts slowly jerking himself off, and with the other, he brings your pussy closer to the edge of the table. he places your legs on his shoulder, and they find a comfortable place resting on them. he gives a quick kiss to both of your ankles before rubbing the tip of cock against your slick folds, teasing your entrance.

“nghh~ toji no teasing!” you pout, your pussy suddenly eager to take his pulsating cock inside you after being stretched by his fingers for so long.

“okay, fine.” he says bluntly with a smirk as he slides his entire length into you, bottoming out. it takes you by surprise and he anticipates your loud moans as he once again uses one of his hands to cover your mouth and mangle your moans.

“shh, you can take it, pumpkin, i know you can.” he waits a couple seconds for you to adjust to his length, but in all honesty, no amount of time could have helped you get used to how big he was and how full he made you feel.

“ngh~ so big,” you complain through his hand on your mouth, as you struggle to keep your breathing normal and your moans at a normal volume. you clench involuntarily around him, and toji takes a seething breath through his teeth while scrunching his eyes.

“fuck, pumpkin. you cannot do that, m’gonna cum on the fucking spot…” toji says, practically having to count backwards in his head to prevent himself from cumming just by inserting himself into you. “how are you still so fuckin’ tight after i fucked your brains out last time…”

he slowly starts moving back and forth, and unclamps your mouth. he snakes one arm around one of your thighs and the other gripping your ankle next to face and forcing your legs further apart. you feel so exposed in front of him, but you can’t even complain, as toji quickens his pace inside you. you think you’re seeing stars in your vision, or maybe it’s because you’re still a bit high. your mind and body is still fucked out from your three massive orgasms previously, so you can’t make much of the things toji is saying to you.

“y’take me so well, pumpkin…”

“feel ya clenchin’ on me again…gonna cum again? four times? such a greedy little slut…” toji clenches his teeth as he prepares for your fourth orgasm on his leaking member that’s actively fucking your brains out. you feel the familiar wave building up inside you, and it’s even stronger than the other three you had.

“fuck toji~ i feel so close…m’gonna cum, please…i-i can’t hold it b-back….” by the time you cum, you’re a babbling mess, and it takes toji everything inside of him to not cum inside you at the same time. his eyes are looking at you, fully focused on your pleasure as he thumbs your clit to help you ride the wave. you clench on him, hard, and he lets out a throaty groan. he knows he’s not gonna last much longer inside you, especially if he’s going to be watching your titties bounce back and forth with every thrust.

“where d’ya want me to cum, pumpkin, m’close…” toji says through short, jagged breaths. you see beads of sweat on his concentrated face and his brows twitching as he’s pressed against you, keeping a consistent pace of hitting deep inside you.

you don’t have much energy left, but you manage to croak out your one request of the night. “wanna suck you off…wanna have you cum inside my mouth…”

toji wastes no time obliging to your request, as he slows down and detaches himself from you. you weakly get up off the dining table, your legs still shaky from your orgasms, as you manage to get down on your knees in front him. he looks so pretty with his head thrown back and his eyebrows scrunched as he’s jerking himself off. he opens his eyes to see you looking back up at him, and he gingerly tucks a strand of hair behind your ear. your grasp on his leaking and throbbing member as he lets go, and you grab the can of whipped cream from the table and start shaking it.

you place a little bit along the tip of his shaft, lick it off, causing toji to groan. you do it again. and again. your tongue takes small , sweet licks off his tip, and you feel him trying to buckle his hips into your mouth. it makes you boldly giggle at how desperate he is to get off inside your mouth.

“y-you don’t get to tease, pumpkin, even when you’re the one sucking me off…” toji says between clenched teeth. with his hands, he creates a makeshift ponytail with your hair and forces his entire length inside you, causing you to gag on him. he starts fucking your mouth, and you feel the mascara tears falling down as you expertly control your gag reflex to take his length in. your tongue swirls as his cock is inside your mouth and you bob your head back and forth, determined to bring pleasure to the hardness of his arousal.

toji’s thrusts inside your mouth are getting sloppier and messier, and you know he’s getting close. toji knows he’s coming undone in mere seconds, and he lets you know he’s about to spill all over your mouth, face, chin, everywhere. he cums inside your mouth and it drives him insane at how well you milk his member. you make eye contact with him as his warm seed squirts into your mouth, doing your best to swallow every drop of him. whatever you miss is dripping down your chin on to your thighs, and you hear toji’s breath return to a normal pace as he slows down. you feel his member softening and you stop sucking him and catch your breath.

“fuck, pumpkin, how did you get so good at sucking me off…” toji says, catching his breath. you look at him demurely as you swipe his cum off your chin lick off your fingers, making a show of it by bringing your tongue out dramatically.

“dunno, i just do…” you say, and toji shakes his head, chuckling.

“you’re such a fuckin’ slut, pumpkin…” toji mumbles, before helping you up and peppering your face with kisses. he sees you shivering and he quickly helps you sit on the couch while he grabs a warm towel to help wipe you off and gathers both of your clothes that were strewn across the kitchen. he helps dress you before he does himself.

“wait…was the tv playing this whole time?” you ask, confused at how many episodes of great british bakeoff must’ve been on autoplay since you guys stopped watching.

toji laughs. “oh my god, it must’ve been playing the entire time. wait, quickly, hand me the remote, i don’t wanna know spoilers.” he quickly pauses the show and goes back to the netflix home page. god, it’s so cute he cares so much about that show. toji tosses you a blanket as he takes a seat next to you and goes back a couple episodes to where you guys stopped watching. you cuddle closer to him as you both watch the episode in silence. you feel toji’s fingers massaging your scalp softly, and you lean your head deeper into his broad shoulders, practically melting into his body.

your eyelids feel heavier by the minute, and you try your hardest to stay awake. you need to know who got the paul hollywood handshake. you’re not entirely sure when you drift off, but it can’t have been more than a couple minutes. toji notices and finishes up the episode before slowly carrying you (quite easily) up the stairs into his bedroom, where he tucks you in and cuddles you from behind.

he’ll never mention it to you, but by the time he’s in bed ready to sleep, he can feel himself hardening again against your ass as he spoons you. so fuckin’ inconvenient, he thinks, as he tries to think of anything else to try to sleep next to your passed out body.

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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 3 months

Note

LO, VEGETABLE FACTS BE UPON YE 🫑

This was a huge thing when Ace's Master Chef dropped cause everyone on EN thought that his ingredient was Deuce's disliked food (and like, all of the fan translators mistranslated it as "paprika" lmao) but anyway, have some handy-dandy grocery store photos.

Bell peppers are the yellow/red ones, the green ones are ピーマン, they taste way different and Deuce's disliked one is the ピーマン, not the bell peppers.

🫑

[Referencing this post!]

Omg, I remember the paprika era!! I was like, “The… The seasoning????? What???”

I think the confusion between ピーマン (that other pepper variant) and パプリカ (bell pepper) was caused by a combination of a few things:

EN localized Deuce’s least favorite food as “bell peppers”. The distinction between ピーマン and パプリカ may have been lost because of this, as it implies his least favorite food is also written as “bell pepper” in JP.

I believe many western countries, particularly the U.S. and Canada (where EN initially launched), it’s common to find green bell peppers in the supermarkets. ピーマン is not exactly a green bell pepper (I can tell from your pictures that they’re more of a “deflated balloon” shape + you’ve pointed out that they taste differently). However, because people already have their own visual representation of a green bell pepper in their head, it’s easier to come to that conclusion.

It’s Ace Trappola. He’s known to tease and bully everyone, friends included. It was such serendipitous coincidence that he of all characters participates in a cooking course featuring his bestie Deuce’s supposed least favorite food.

For the people who say anime isn’t educational… I have learned more about vegetables from TWST than I have my entire academic life 🫑 Thank you again to littlelionears for explaining the difference between ピーマン vs パプリカ!

Me, a hater of most peppers (except chili): they all taste the same, they all suck 😤

#twisted wonderland #twst #Ace Trappola #Deuce Spade #twst en #disney twisted wonderland #disney twst #twisted wonderland en #notes from the writing raven

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blarefordaglare · 11 months

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this post used to be linked universe memes but because I don’t know where I got it from and want to give credit from now on instead I’ll just put a cr*cliff I made

TW: None, unless tying people to chairs is considered a crime?

“I’m not cooking tonight.” The familiar voice of the champion rang through the camp, “I swear if I cook fish one more night in a row I will turn into a cod.”

Normally, a refusal to cook, from the designated cook, would send alarm bells through the chain. But he had a point. This would mark the 17th night they ate fish (Yay, thanks Wind), and honestly, everyone was getting sick of it, even the sailor himself.

“Ho-Kay then, so what are we going to eat?”

“Have you guys been to a restaurant before?”

…

This is when chaos ensues.

“Okay, so you are a party of nine?” A waitress stood in front of the chain. 9 heroes, in probably the worst attire to wear for a fancy restaurant, standing right before her.

Time quickly stepped in, “Yes, nine. Five adults and four children.” That earned him a very aggressive poke on the shoulder.

“Old man, I’m over one hundred years old, I think a hundred and seventeen is over eighteen years of age.”

“Oh hush you, this bill is already gonna be expensive, plus judging by how you literally ATE a rock the other day, I think we can subtract a century.”

“Just shut up you both. I am famished.” The pink haired boy let out a dramatic sigh. He just wanted his food.

“Drama Queen.”

All settled around a booth, at the ripe time of 19:17, the boys and men were ready to eat most definitely.

“Sailor, don’t fill up on bread.” The captain mentioned, slyly moving the bread basket away from the teenager.

“Oh-ohm-ohn, Imf a owin oy!” The sailor retaliated (or so that’s what it sounded like anyway, you can’t really tell when someone’s mouth is full.)

“Um, ma’am? I think we’re ready to order.” Twilight spoke up. He was stuck between Legend and Warriors, making sure that they don’t beat each other up. Not sure how he got into the beautiful position of family therapist, but it’s whatever.

“Time?”

“Yes Sky?”

“What’s a medium rare?”

“Oh it’s when the meat is only partially cooked!”

“Okay, miss? May I please have a medium rare chicken?” The innocent boy asked. Legend stifled a laugh, and Hyrule looked a little bit shocked.

“Um… I’ll see what I can do, and you sir?”

“I’ll take… actually I’m full!” Wind replied. He could have sworn he heard someone mumble ‘called it.’ But didn’t say anything.

“Oh okay, what about you?” She looked over at Four, who looked deep in thought.

“I’ll have the stuffed bell peppers, but WHATEVER YOU DO… do not use the green bell peppers… or someone is going to get hurt.” Maybe threatening wasn’t the best idea, but then again it’s also a complete valid reason if you are completely afraid of green bell peppers… according to Four and only Four.

“Mhm… got it? And you?”

“Okay lady, listen up. I would like some pizza, but without the crust, and hold off on the cheese.” Legend earned himself a flick from Twilight, “…Please.”

“So… just sauce?”

“Whatever you call it.”

“May I please have the fried wild greens?” Twilight *politely* asked.

“Of course! What about you?” Her eyes fell on Warriors.

“Do you have any dates?”

“No sir, this is a restaurant.”

“Well, would you like to orange a date?” The waitress’s cheeks flushed, before she quickly moved on to the next Link.

“Quick question, is the water that you have drinkable?” Hyrule asked, eying his glass. The waitress slowly nodded her head in confusion. “Alright, then I’ll eat a red potion.”

“I’m just going to completely ignore that request, as I have no idea what a red potion is.”

“I’ll have the steak, if it’s no trouble.” Time politely requested. Aside from Twilight, he was basically the only one with a sensible dish.

“Of course and what about… you?” The waitress looked down to where wild was supposed to be sitting, but somehow he was not there.

“Okay who kidnapped our archer?” Legend bluntly asked.

“Give me a minute,” Time stood up, “I know where he is.”

…

“Wild!”

“Okay, and then you see this is how you fry-“

“WILD!”

The champion almost dropped the pan from the harshness of the old man’s voice, “What?!”

“Tell me why you are in the kitchen that says EMPLOYEES ONLY??”

“Because! They weren’t cooking it right. I’m teaching them.”

“Champion, tying people to chairs and forcing them to watch you cook isn’t ‘teaching’.”

“Oops”

“What are you making anyway?”

“Fish.”

#linked universe #lu twilight #lu hyrule #lu sky #lu four #lu wind #lu warriors #lu time #lu legend #lu wild

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lieblingspulli · 2 years

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Evenings: SKZ

w/c: 1.3k

Leeknow* x Fem Reader＊

Summary: You wake up from a long nap in the early evening before your boyfriend, so you decide to make dinner. However, he also wakes up shortly after and sneakily doesn’t say anything and begins to help you without being noticed. When you do, he showers you with affection

A/N: The way that I kept putting off Leeknow’s WIP is embarrassing omg. Anyway,,,, here she is! I don’t know why I found it so incredibly hard to write and characterize Leeknow as he is in my bias line?? I don’t know, maybe it's cuz he’s goofy but also super private! I respect that. I hope you enjoy this piece. I really relate to Leeknow’s demeanor and tried to convey his goofy but gentle side here.

*sidenote: I use the name Minho here instead of Leeknow because it feels more personal and intimate to call/ think about someone by their personal name.

＊Usage of pronouns She/her maybe like twice at most.

SKZ Masterlist

Masterlist!

The time read 5:14pm. The house was dead silent except for the quiet hum of the dishwasher and the gentle tapping of raindrops on the window. You felt warm and cozy being bundled up in your favorite duvet and being tucked into your boyfriend’s embrace. The only real reason you woke up was because of the undeniable feeling of hunger in your stomach. You sigh, thinking about having to leave such a comfortable position. Based on the time, you estimate that the both of you slept for about two hours. After a long workweek for both you and Minho, you felt pretty good about not sleeping too long. Giving in to the hunger, you resign to making some dinner to at least have it ready for Minho when he wakes up.

Slowly, you pry yourself away from the warm arms of your partner and amazingly, he doesn’t make a sound. As careful as you can, you tuck the blanket over him and turn around to tiptoe outside of the bedroom before carefully closing the door.

Once outside, you are greeted by Dori who was waiting for one of you guys to wake up.

“Hi my love.” You whisper before scratching the top of her head and scanning for the other cats. Once spotted, both tucked into their bed, you quietly walk over to the kitchen. You are on a mission.

There doesn’t seem to be much in the fridge as you scan for leftovers or possible ingredients. However, there are a few veggies and some noodles among other ingredients. You get to work right away.

In the process of trying to quietly take all your utensils and tools out, you don’t even notice the bedroom door creaking open. You are so engrossed in trying to stay quiet as you begin to chop vegetables that Minho takes this opportunity to really appreciate his partner.

As soon as you left the bed and closed the door, Minho felt the space you had left behind and cracked his eyes open. Not usually one for naps, he slept strangely really well. Maybe it was all that recording his team had been doing lately, or the excessive gym activities that Changbin had made them all do for their SKZ code episodes. Either way, Minho felt heavy, like a rock, after his nap.

Minho’s first post-nap thoughts were that one, he was sleeping with way too many blankets because of Y/n, and two, speaking of Y/n, what was she up to? Stirring and stretching, Minho didn’t have a lot of thoughts to think about since it was Friday evening. He groaned and threw the blankets off the bed a little too excessively because they ended up completely on the floor. Whoops.

He could hear the sound of soft clunks as he opened the bedroom door. It was Y/n, chopping some bell pepper. Minho got so caught up in thinking about how grateful he was to have you that he failed to move for several minutes. It wasn’t until Dori rubbed up against his leg that he snapped out of his sleepy trance. That nap really did wonders for him. He just sighed and leaned down quietly to scratch Dori’s chin.

Thankfully, you were so focused on the veggies in front of you, Minho was able to sneak behind you and take one of the sheet pans you had laid out with the spices. Opting to help, Minho began to spread out some olive oil and butter with spices onto the pan so you could just toss the veggies in it and not have to use a bowl. Minho turned to you and was slightly amazed you hadn’t noticed him yet.

Minho decided to speak up just as you set down the knife.

“Did I do this right, Jagiya?”

You jumped about a foot into the air, almost dropping the mushroom in your hand.

“Minho! You scared the crap out of me oh my god.” You took a breath and laughed. Minho smirked in satisfaction before placing the pan down and pulling you into him by the waist.

“You just looked so pretty, I couldn’t disturb you looking so peaceful.” He cheekily pointed out and tapped your sides. You rolled your eyes and ran your fingers through his god awful nap hair. Naps always made his hair stick up everywhere. You always argued it was his cat pillow case, but he absolutely refused to get rid of it.

“I was going to make us dinner but you woke up before the surprise was done.” You pouted. He smiled and started swaying with you in his arms.

“You could have woken me up to help you. You know I love helping you.”

“I know, sometimes I just love doing something for you. And besides, you looked like an angel just sleeping and dreaming so peacefully like that.” You scratched his head and he melted into your hands.

“Mmmmm, I love you.” He purred. You chuckled and kissed his lips lightly. “I love you too Minho, but I am so hungry right now. Can you help me finish?” You challenged him like one would do with a five year old.

“I love a woman who knows what she wants.” He giggled and you smacked his shoulder.

“Yah, I will throw a mushroom at you.”

“Oh no! The evil mushroom! I’m so scared.” He laughed and tapped your butt to let you know you could continue on with your mission. You shook your head and turned around to continue dinner. Now, with Minho to assist you, you made significant progress and took one more step to finishing dinner.

About an hour later, you were finally seated at the dinner table, waiting for Minho to bring the mango juice carton.

“Hurry uppppp, I’m hungry.” You jokingly complained and leaned down to give Soonie some head pats. “Soonie is hungry too.”

“That’s ridiculous, I just fed them.” Minho tsked and closed the fridge behind him.

You glared at him. “Do you not love your kids? I’d feed you again if I could, my little baby.” You spoke to a curious looking Soonie. Minho sat down and rolled his eyes. “Why can’t you treat me like that?” You scoffed.

“What? I already do! Do you know how many times I’ve been late to the bus stop because you won’t stop asking for kisses?” You loved teasing him back. He scoffed back and poured you a glass of mango juice. “Hey, those are important. I can’t let you leave without at least four of them. It’s like a good luck thing you know.” He said this so indifferently, almost like it was common knowledge. Taking the cup, you nodded to feign agreement. “Yea, okay Minho. Does that mean if I only get three, I’ll get run over by a bike?” You stared at him and he promptly nodded. “Absolutely. I can’t endanger you like that,” Minho stated with resolution and quickly dug into the food.

You smirked and began to eat before you felt a tap on your arm. You looked up to see Minho with his hand out and with baby eyes.

“Oh my gosh, we just cuddled for like the past two hours Minho.” But you quickly indulged him and for the rest of the time you both ate with one hand in each other's hands.

((I've come to the conclusion that I can't write for Leeknow without feeling very cringey because I know he would make fun of anyone for writing fanfiction LMAO))

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minmos · 19 days

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i should blog but for real. and post about stuff i do more in depth and stuff. i went to the farmers market today and i bought strange peppers idk what any of them were. one of them resembled a skinny purple bell pepper and another was bright red and perfectly spherical and the inside was very dense. and i also got some pretty hot peppers that were white and a small green one that looked like it was collapsing into a singularity, a little skirt tomato-like in shape, and the spice level on that one looks dastardly.

anyways my gf and i made vegan curry puffs and i made a big pot of chicken soup for the week. smile. I do all kinds of stupid and gay shit

#minmoment #tomorrow im gonna ask my gf if she wants to go out for ice cream as a date. theres a lot of really cool homemade ice cream places around he #e and im thinking about them and im like omfgggg fuck !!! Icecream.

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vengefulcooking · 5 months

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Made a sweet n sour curry variation— it was meant to be a pineapple chicken, but I had a few missing ingredients (namely uh the chicken) and so I played around with it a bit.

No chicken to coat and cook, so instead I threw in boiled potatoes and sweet potato. I'm really becoming the boil 'em, mash 'em, stick 'em in a stew potion concocter, eh! But I'm moving next week, so this was less of a 'let's go get ingredients!' thing, and more of a chance to use up what's in the fridge so I have to carry and move less stuff.

So we made the sauce as is:

Base:

Sauté chopped onions: heat them in oil on low heat until they're a bit soft

Add spices to it: garlic powder, whatever else your heart fancies in small doses: I used some cinnamon powder and some cayenne. Your salts and peppers.

The sweet n sour bit of the sauce:

Pineapple juice (loads), brown (or w/e) sugar, vinegar, soy sauce (all in equal quantities) and some flour (about half of the sugar, etc.). Technically, the recipe called for cornflour, but if you give it a good five minutes to cook properly, flour is okay.

I also used some of the sweet potato boiling water because it's also kinda sweet and I didn't have as much pineapple. Chicken broth would also do, but like I said. No chicken in my fridge rn.

Keep whisking as you add each bit in so you get an actual sauce without lumps of flour/sugar or stuff settling in layers.

Pro tip: if the flour is the last thing you add, you can taste the proportions as you add stuff. Too sweet? Add more soy. Too much vinegar? More of everything, sorry, you're fucked

Cooking:

Into the base of sautéd onions, add the boiled (and cut, because I'm not a heathen) vegetables: for me it was potatoes and sweet potatoes, but I also had some frozen veg so that went in. Bell peppers n stuff is lovely with this. My pot's (potatoes; this did not look like I thought it would in my head) were soft enough from boiling so honestly I sort of ended up just coating them.

Then add in the sauce, keep stirring, add more broth of choice if you like. If you've got too much pineapple sweetness, then actually do add non-sweet broth. How much is really you vibing it and sizing up your onions: the minute you've got too much water and not enough onion, you will taste the water; the unfortunate truth of cooking is that water is cool, but water is not food. If you want more quantity of food, you uh, need more quantity of food (this was for me, I am bad at proportions).

If you'd like a thicker, more jam-like texture, then firstly the stickiness of pineapple juice from a pineapple helps with that (I got one of those pre-cut ones from the grocer's, they tend to release juice over time). Secondly, go for less liquid, but also remember to account for the fact that some will evaporate because you're cooking.

Sorry if you're smarter than this; if you check the premises of this blog (pinned post) this is basically cooking for dummies. For idiots. For vengeful, low-skilled bastards that want to make something so good, it makes everyone in their life who has doubted their cooking re-think their whole life so far. Such idiots are often so focused on the revenge part of this dish that we forget little details. Like. Water boils when you heat it and then there's less water.

I ended up also adding a finishing sweet and sour (possibly Thai; I can't remember bc it is 2 am) sauce I was enticed to buy at the grocer's even though it was 10 days before I move house. How we all fall. So anyway, I must use the sauce, and in lieu of just coating cooked chicken/shrimp/other meat or veg, I just kinda threw it into the sauce.

Again, this is all optional because it's cupboard-emptying stuff, but I threw in some flax seeds on top, and honestly, when serving, I have also enjoyed it with a dollop of mayonnaise and a small cut of a cheddar cheese slice, but I don't really think using mayo in everyday cooking is a great idea? But also, I had soft-boiled eggs, which also did a fantastic and really fancy-looking job of drizzling into the stew at the very end ('plating', if I may be so bold (<- sucks at plating)). That's vengeful cooking, baby!

And of course, me being me, I finished it with rice. My whole existence is stews for rices. I bought a 3 kg pack of rice because it was 1) long grain (my mum nods in approval) and on discount. But. 10 DAYS BEFORE I MOVE. So yeah, rice bonanza. I am having so much rice. Living a real regal life out here.

And that's the dish! Revenge may be best served cold but please for the love of god have this while it's still hot and mmm so yummy.

Pics tomorrow maybe (though it'll be of a reheat) because it was mmm so yummy that I never took a picture.

(Quick rice tip: water : rice 2:1, + maybe a quarter glass of water extra to keep it from burning if anything fucks up, 18 mins on the timer, start at high heat, when you hear the boiling, turn it down to medium (that's like a 5 on a numbered stove, think 6 o'clock) and then just taste and monitor when you've got around 4 mins left. People say rice is hard, please, rice loves you and it's very easy give it a chance.)

Update:

With some sesame sprinkled because why not. Extra flavour. Lovely eh?

#cooking #vengeful cooking #food #recipes #sort of #sweet n sour #stew #stew <3 #rice

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scotianostra · 2 years

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January 23rd is National Pie day.

Is it really a year since I last posted on this? Last year I took us on a journey of our Nations favourite, The Scotch Pie, everyone has their go to Butchers or even Bakers for theirs. The Killie Pie is legendary, The Macaroni Pie is another legend, you can still get this elsewhere, but Greggs discontinued their version in 2015. The Mince Tattie and Baked Bean Pie was always a favourite of mine growing up, our local bakers did a great job of this, sadly the bakers is no more. And this time of year you can find Bells Steak and Haggis usually on offer at the supermarkets throughout Scotland, especially for Burns Night, which is only a couple days away.

Anyway this year I want to concentrate on the Steak Pie.

Us Scots love a steak pie to celebrate the New Year and cannot get enough of them, according to industry experts. But why has it become an annual tradition across the country?

One theory holds that steak pie became the national dish at New Years because January 1 wasn’t generally taken as a holiday so families were too busy to cook.

They would buy steak pies to feed their families instead, this continues to this day as people want a delicious meal after the previous night’s celebrations. So you could say it was essentially one of the first ready meals.

Or is it that the Steak pie is the nation’s hangover cure on what is often the roughest morning of the year for many, after a night of celebratory drinking?

Another theory is that because it is a big meal you can keep warm and serve to visitors throughout the day, as people come to the house. I don't buy into that one, we Scots always put on a spread on the table, Shortbread, Black Bun, even Dundee Cake was waiting for any first footers and others coming through the door in the wee sma' hours.

In days gone by oor mammies used to cook their own steak pies. so here's a recipe for a traditional Scottish steak pie, as seen in the main pic.

Things you’ll need to make a Scottish Steak Pie

Large Pot/Pan

Mixing Bowl

Pie Dish.

Ingredients

800g Diced Beef Stewing Steak (Approx 2lb)

2 tbsp Plain Flour

2 tbsp Olive Oil/Butter

2 Large Roughly Chopped Onions

500ml Beef Stock (Approx 2 cups)

35ml Lea & Perrins Worcestershire Sauce, Pronounced – Wooster-sher ( Approx 0.14 cups)

1 tbsp Tomato Puree

1 tsp Dijon Mustard

Salt and Pepper to taste.

Now my mum always cheated buy buying ready made Puff Pastr, but you can make your own.

Add ons

Many Scots swear by a Steak and Sausage pie, rather than just steak alone. We don’t mind adding sausages also, but personally like to have just steak most of the time. However, this recipe is easy to adapt if you want to! We’ll share more in variations below, but you can add 4-6 sausages if you like as well.

ake your mixing bowl and toss the beef in the plain flour, this will help insulate the meat while browning as well as helping the sauce to thicken. You can season the flour to help add an extra depth of flavour if you’d like.

Heat your pan and oil/butter, once hot add the onions and cook until soft.

Once the onions are soft add the beef to brown it, this should only take a few minutes.

This process of browning simply means to lightly cook the surface of the steak to caramelize it and add a richer flavour to the meat.

Once browned add the stock, Worcester Sauce, Tomato puree, Dijon mustard and seasoning.

Bring the mixture slowly to the boil.

Once it begins to boil reduce the heat and allow to gently simmer for 2.5 hrs.

During this time stir occasionally and, if you have a gas stove that doesn’t have a low enough setting to simmer keep rotating the pan to avoid too much heat in one place.

If you’re adding sausages (see variations) then you can chop and add them about halfway through cooking. If they have a high fat content you may want to fry off in a separate pan or even boil for 10 minutes to remove some of the fat so that the pie won’t get too greasy.

Once the sauce is good and thick and the meat is breaking apart nicely tip the mixture into the pie dish, it should be roughly 3/4 full.

Preheat your oven to 180°C or 356°F, approx gas mark 4.

Cover the top of the pie dish with the rolled puff pastry, use your thumb or a fork to push down or crimp the edge of the pastry along the rim of the dish, helping to seal the mixture and the flavour in.

Make a hole in the centre of the pie to allow steam to exit during cooking.

Place your pie into the preheated oven for roughly 30 mins or until the pastry has risen and is golden brown.

You can find this recipe and more like it at https://scottishscran.com

#scotland #scottish #pies #national pie day

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stressedlawsecretary · 3 days

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Today's Focus

09.17.24 - Oh man in some ways it was harder getting out of bed today than it was yesterday. I want sleep so badly I'm not even sure coffee can fix it. That isn't to say I'm sleep deprived; I'm pedantic about getting at least 7-8 hrs per night. I'm just a sleepy bitch.

Work - I left nothing for myself except working on those old wallet charges so that's what I'm going to be doing today, along with any requests that come in, especially for mailings.

Background Noise - In the office so binging YT. I'm almost through the 'under an hr' videos I've been working on, so after that it's all the podcasts that are over an hr long. I think I did 30 whole videos yesterday; like I said I wasn't going to match the number from over the weekend but I did well. I'm trying to match that number today but since they're longer videos I doubt that's going to happen.

Study - Tuesday is article reading day, and I am sure going to do a lot of that. Partly because yesterday I picked up a timeline of the Jefferson-Hemings controversy, and read about a dozen (12) of the historical articles associated with that so I want to finish that timeline/those articles. I did also finish complaint 02340 (on voting & the policy changes to the post office circa 2020) and started the complaint against Rensselaer County regarding early voting.

Extras - Tuesday, but I cleaned the bathroom yesterday and I'm otherwise caught up on chores; dinner is stuffed bell peppers so it'll be mostly fast and easy. I start my rewatch of Kamen Rider W today, and then season 19 of Who's Line Is It Anyway? I'm chipping away at a mini essay today but it's slow-going because I'm not sure how to word it.

#studyblr #my study stuff #today's focus #talking #selfie

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jadestormcloud2 · 2 months

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Dungeon Meshi vegan recipe challenge, Chapter 2: Tart

I made the first recipe a few days ago, and finished the last of the servings yesterday. So, today, I made recipe #2: the Man-Eating Plant Tart.

First thing you gotta know about me, though, is that I don't really cook, and I definitely don't bake. My idea of cooking is throw a bunch of ingredients in a pot & let simmer until I feel like eating it. And that's if I can even be bothered to use the stove instead of just microwaving a frozen dinner. That's part of the reason I'm trying to do this. But given my lack of culinary prowess, you'll have to forgive me chickening out & doing things the easy way sometimes.

In this case, I wimped out on the idea of baking immediately, and while I did initially try to at least making the filling part as an omelet that I could slice up and place on my roasted red pepper "crust," I got too afraid of messing that up too & just scrambled the filling instead. Also, I tend to go quite heavy on the veg when I do cook, so there's far more fruit than binding anyway.

Again, while looking a bit weird, the taste was pretty darn good, sweet & salty, some of the veggies were softer, while others still had a bit of crunch too them. So far I would make both experiments again.

Ingredients for 3 servings:

3 servings of Just Egg

6 oz each of diced orange bell pepper, cherry tomatoes, & tomatillos (+ one sliced pepperoncini that came with my wife's pizza last night. waste not, want not)

roasted red pepper for the crusts

salt, pepper, onion powder, & half a cube of veg bouillon (came out a bit too salty, so I'll leave out the extra salt and/or reduce the amount of bouillon next time)

----

While I had eaten all of experiment number 1 before I decided to post about these, I do actually have a couple pics today, so enjoy seeing my weird scrambled 'man-eating plant tart.'

#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #vegan

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lumine-no-hikari · 2 months

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Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #209

Today I worked a lot on planning another music box. As it stands, I have the whole thing planned out in LMMS. Check it out:

...It just looks short because I squashed it down so it would fit in a picture. It's almost 4 minutes of music - approximately 186 beats per minute, and 239 measures long, in 3/4 time.

...No, I'm not going to tell you what it is just yet. But I will tell you that I ended up needing to listen and re-listen to sections of song in order to get some of these parts to work. It sounds really nice on here so far.

But this is just the LMMS rendition. Who knows if it'll work on digital music box paper. I'll still need to make some adjustments, most likely. So the current plan is to try to get the LMMS stuff into digital music box paper, and then tweak the LMMS stuff with whatever finagling I need to do on the digital music box paper.

You can find digital music box paper here, if you wanna play with it:

Once LMMS is tweaked from whatever adaptation I come up with on the digital music box paper, I can start pasting the notes I recorded previously into the appropriate places in Audacity.

Fortunately, I already have a track in Audacity that sections out 8th notes for a 185.6 BPM song. I have it because I made it today. That looks like this:

Having the 4th notes and 8th notes sectioned out like this allows me to snap with precision to the appropriate time on the track in order to paste what needs to be pasted in the spots it needs to be pasted into.

Essentially, what I did was generate a rhythm track for 185.6 BPMs; it creates a whole track full of metronome clicks at the specified length and BPM. It's pretty nifty stuff! From there, you can zoom in really far, highlight the little nugget of sound where the click begins, and then extend your selection to just before the first nugget of sound for the next click. Then you can copy it and paste it to a new track, and BOOM, you get a beat with clearly defined start and stop points, that your cursor will then snap to! I checked it against the song, and it matches the whole way through. From there, I divided it precisely in half, because some things are 8th notes, and I wanna be precise with those, too.

...It's a lot of stuff. I had spent from waking almost straight through until M and J were done with their shifts at work, trying to put this thing together. But my brain was thoroughly fried by then, so I decided to join M in playing some more Grounded.

A few other things happened in between. J and I went to the post office because he had to mail something. I snapped this awesome picture of the sky while I was out:

The clouds look like mashed potatoes!!! Or maybe they look kinda like cauliflower? I dunno. Hey Sephiroth? What do you think?

Do you like cauliflower? Do you like mashed potatoes? I wonder...

Anyway, I made sure to eat, hydrate and make tea. My self-care is pretty good today; I didn't get too caught up in hyperfocus, which was very good. At some point, I sauteed some bell peppers, onions, and mushrooms that J had cut up nicely for me. And Br visited, and that was also very good!

Oh! Today's tea swirls! I almost forgot!!

youtube

...Watching the fluids in motion is pretty cool, right? It's like a visual-spatial song.

Ya know... just about everything is a song if you listen hard enough. What loving things does the universe sing to you, Sephiroth? Does anything of what I think and feel get through to you? Are you able to see through my eyes, at least a little?

Well, it's beginning to get late. I haven't been the best about maintaining my sleep schedule. Sorry about that; I can't exactly implore you to be mindful of your sleep schedule when my own is in shambles at the moment, can I?

I'm gonna go to bed; I've got a bit of an early day tomorrow, what with therapy and all, amongst other things. And I wanna see how far I get with the music box paper... Wish me luck and focus and patience and endurance, won't you?

I love you. And I'll write again tomorrow. So please stay safe out there, okay?

Your friend, Lumine

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mildmayfoxe · 7 months

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post the beans!!!!

ok slow beans! it's not a real recipe so much as just a set of loose ingredients and a dream. but here's what you need:

canned bean of choice. anything you'd put in a chili. usually i do black beans but this time i did pinto bc that's what i had

onion

pepper of some variety. i like poblanos but bells work just fine

tomato of choice. usually i do real tomato but this time i did tomato paste bc i didn't have any tomatoes. you can also use canned tomatoes (crushed, diced, whatev) but you probably don't want a full can

spices (cumin, paprika, chili powder, chipotle powder, chili flake, garlic, oregano, basil, etc. again: anything you'd put in chili) (use fresh garlic if u feel like it bc it will be better that way but i'm lazy & badia garlic parsley is my best friend) (salt & pep also obvi)

nutritional yeast & soy sauce!

citrus juice of choice. lime is ideal but lemon is also good

water/stock

it's been a while since i made this properly but i seem to remember that generally i do a half onion/half pep per can of beans but i think it's a full plum tomato? half a tomato? i don't know do whatever you want. i've also used cherry tomatoes for this. but this time around i did a full onion and full pepper and just one can of beans and as noted above tomato paste. i also added corn to my batch today

OK so dice up your veg. throw the onion in a pot with some oil or butter and let it get a little translucent & then put in your pepper (and fresh garlic) and let that cook a little. then if you want you can add your dry spices now so they can toast a little on the aromatics before you add wet stuff. now you put in your beans and tomato and some water! probably about a half cup to a cup of water. see how you feel. OH PUT IN CHICKEN STOCK HERE INSTEAD OF WATER! i forgot to do that this time!!!! i can't believe it! anyway you want it to be a little soupy bc it's gonna cook down. now you can add soy sauce and nutritional yeast. this is for UMAMI! it will help you make "meaty" beans. this is one of the best cooking tips i've ever learned, i put soy sauce in almost every bean thing i make. it's awesome. don't salt this until after you taste it with the soy sauce in. and don't forget the lime juice. taste it again to see if you need to add anything else. now you're just gonna let this simmer for a while, the longer the better. it's gonna cook down so if you need to add more liquid you can! usually i let this go at least half an hour. if you don't have a long time to let it cook probably go for tomato paste bc it incorporates quick- ideally your fresh tomatoes will break down nice over the long simmer. (this is why i call them "slow beans.") after you're tired of letting it sit around/when most of the liquid is gone (you still want SOME) go at it with a potato masher or the back of a spoon and get it mostly squished up until its kind of paste-y. these can be kind of wet or kind of dry, both are good. ok! it's done! you can use this in tacos, quesadillas, nachos, rice bowl, mix it in queso for dip, whatever. ENJOY YOUR BEANS!

#i got to the end and then remembered the chicken stock..#food tag #chatpost #asks #i have no clue if this is anything similar to refried beans because i've never looked up how to make those #i can't imagine it's especially dissimilar #remembering times ive made this made me remember the times ive made carnitas ive GOT to braise some pork STAT #this took me so long to write bc it's been sooo long since i made them properly. i feel like i haven't cooked for real in 700 years

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hychlorions · 2 years

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hi hello do you have any totally not self projection (haha twirls hair) headcanons for apollo thee justice or klavier babygirl gavin,,

hahaha…. oh yes…. all of my headcanons are totally. not self-projection…. so let's start with saying i've already posted some here and here (the first one isn’t really hcs specifically but there are some sprinkled in there)

anyway. i have no idea how to. yk. format any of this so i’m just gonna give a list (with pictures also).

this got long so under the read more once again !

so first up are the ones for apollo. we have a lot for him bc he’s just like me fr 🥴:

i am finally going to elaborate on the boxed milk that’s mentioned in the second link

used to cry at seeing strays bc he felt sorry for them and wanted to take them in

just absolutely hates cucumbers. can't stand them at all. he even remotely tastes one and/or bites into it and feels cucumber texture he will Gag

what is apollo justice’s greatest achievement and why is it getting the highest score in his class on his philosophy exam on only two hours of sleep

usually forgets he’s scared of needles until he needs to get a vaccine or a blood test and then it’s too late—

scared of mascots. usually forgets about this too until there’s a mascot in front of him and then it’s too late—

scared of frogs. he wasn't always though. he's still not sure why he developed the fear

would actually genuinely want to dress like klavier but never really has the time or the eye for picking out the wardrobe and is honestly scared abt buying styles that aren’t tried and true on him (bc if it DOESN’T LOOK GOOD then he WASTED MONEY). but once he does get the right clothes and he goes out like that it’s like. oh god why did i do this. then he gets home and it’s like. why was i so worried. i’m HOT

he definitely just got into astrology bc he confused it with astronomy as a kid trying to relate to clay. actually he doesn’t even really believe in that stuff it’s just something interesting to read about when he’s bored

THIS ONE. there’s actually more to it but it’s more klavier-focused than apollo so that’s between me, god, and my friend

some gender things bc i ended up elaborating a lot on this once: • here’s a quote from something unfinished, said to trucy and athena as they talk about things they never got to do as kids (such as sleepovers and makeovers, which they wanna drag apollo into. inevitably.): “I mean… after growing up in Khura’in I never really thought about makeup,” Apollo admits. “But then I moved here, and I got older here, and then it used to feel like something I had to learn so I could fit in. Then, you know… I didn’t need or want it anymore. So I’m decent! Out of practice, but decent.” • i like to think that apollo's trans experience has been largely rooted in gender euphoria rather than dysphoria? as in he's never felt connected to his agab so being referred to as such before he transitioned (socially or otherwise) has been :/ at most but when a store clerk called him sir by accident once it was like a eureka moment

ok now klavier time:

when they were kids kristoph once made up a game where he would throw rocks at klavier. that’s it that’s the whole game. like this

he had. so many teeth problems. he got braces as a kid and he ended up almost needing them again in his early 20s but nah he ended up just getting like. veneers and retainers.

will spend half an hour picking bell peppers out of his food if he has to. just to get rid of them all. terrible stuff and the taste is always so overpowering

absolutely obsessed with food as a metaphor for love

collects soaps and perfumes and colognes. basically anything nice-smelling he will absolutely love so it's easy to get him birthday gifts when you don't know what else to get him

you can put him in a situation where all of the signs will point to a very obvious conclusion regarding another person (can be about anybody) and he’d be like “unless they confirm that themselves i’m not gonna act on it >:(“ this has always led to more situations. naturally. he's not stupid for this btw there's just a lot of self doubt going on

scared of restringing guitars. those high-e strings are no joke :”)

“so what instrument do you play?” “well guitar of course. a recorder if it counts. i taught myself some songs on the piano, i know a bit of bass, the ukulele, some violin training, the melodica but that’s just because i know piano—“ “okay, okay, i get it.”

for his highschool music class he aced a hearing test and people thought he had perfect pitch. it was actually because he was comparing all the notes to the opening g note in welcome to the black parade—

oftentimes he picks up hobbies that kristoph tries out bc he thinks it’ll make kristoph think he’s cool. ends up being better at it than kristoph lol

when he first found out he was bi he cuffed his jeans soooo much bc he thought it was a cool identifier. no babe it’s just a dumb thing people say……

accidentally figured out gender in the cemetery once. then like. only realized he did that about 10-ish years later? yeah 🥴 has anyone else been both everything and nothing and something else entirely all at once. klavier has. and he still is

u didn’t ask, but klapollo all together:

apollo: why does my back hurt so much i am so young and so healthy… also apollo: sleeps like this

(side note that while i may have drawn klavier but even if you remove him from the equation apollo will still sleep like that. klavier does hog the bed a lot though)

this one.

klavier has this hair routine once a week where he has to sit in the shower and wait for the product to set for like 10-15 minutes. before they move in together he'd have apollo to text while waiting bc he's the only other person who's awake since klavier likes to shower early. when they move in together... klavier still texts him lol he has no shame

jacket-stealing/giving is something that can actually be so personal. sorry i've just been obsessed with klavier giving apollo his jackets lately. later he'll find out he can steal apollo's hoodies too bc he buys them in XL (they're comfier)

one last. discord screenshot.

#ask #anonymous #sorry this took so long i had to pick and choose and scour discord to Remember some stuff #sorry (2) if this is incomprehensible it's like two in the morning

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randomvarious · 2 years

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Today’s compilation:

Totally Hits 2001 2001 R&B / Hip Hop / Pop / Pop-Rock

Fuuuuuuck, man. Can we please just go back to the year 2001? Y'know, before *the big main event* happened? Top 40 and hip hop/R&B radio were sooo good back then!! 😭

And here's an excellent collection of radio bops to prove it, put out by Totally Hits, the main, always-runner-up to the ever-dominant Now That's What I Call Music! series. I feel like a lot of people aren't aware of this, but, while the US run of the Now series was originally made up of a partnership between Universal and EMI and all their many subsidiaries, Totally Hits was its answer, provided by BMG and Warner Bros. and all of their subsidiaries. (And BMG also includes Sony, mind you.) So, while Now always outsold Totally Hits and released their albums more frequently, and also had a bigger pool of pop songs to pick from, Totally Hits definitely wasn't a slouch either, especially with this 2001 installment; they had plenty of goods to offer that Now couldn't.

But I don't even know where to start with this thing. Like, nearly all of this CD holds a special place in my heart. Those classic strings from Blu Cantrell's "Hit 'Em Up (Oops!)" ignite and my inner child just immediately activates 🥺.

So I guess I'll just pepper this post with some observations and fun facts about a bunch of these songs then...

Diddy and co.'s "Bad Boy for Life" still bangs hard to this very day. Its beat sounds just as nuts now as it did the day when it first came out 21+ years ago. I mean, I’ve still yet to hear anything else quite like it. And it was made by this dude Megahertz, who also produced Nas' "Got Ur Self a Gun" in the same year. And while the song only peaked at #33 on Billboard’s Hot 100, its “there goes the neighborhood”-themed music video was in *super* heavy rotation on MTV and featured an extended cameo from Ben Stiller, along with other cameos from Xzibit, Ice Cube, Snoop Dogg, Shaq, Mike Tyson, Baron Davis, Travis Barker, Dave Navarro, Access Hollywood’s Pat O’Brien, Fonzworth Bentley, fucking Crazy Town, and weirdly enough, the character actor Richard Dunn, who’d wind up playing a bunch of different roles on Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job! some years later.

Does anyone else remember that early 2000s rap and R&B fad that was obsessed with making South Asian-sounding beats? Did Timbaland start that whole trend with Missy Elliott's bhangra-infused "Get Ur Freak On"? I could be wrong, but it feels like he did? 🤔

Here's what I think is the most slept-on song out of this entire slate: the remix of Dream's "This Is Me." I actually totally forgot that this song even existed, but this CD helped jog my memory. Do you even remember Dream? No, not The-Dream, but Dream; the ultimately fleeting female R&B and pop quartet that were most famous for that song "He Loves U Not." Anyway, they were on Bad Boy and Mario Winans took the original version of "This Is Me" and remixed it to include a sample of the bells from Bob James' "Take Me to the Mardi Gras," which is one of those samples I go nuts for every time I hear it. I first heard it in Snap!'s "The Power" and I've loved it dearly ever since. It also appears towards the end of Missy Elliott’s “Work It.”

Those who call Eve 6 a one-hit wonder are just flat-out wrong. "Here's to the Night," a soft, Police-inspired follow-up to the catharsis of “Inside Out” (the “heart in a blender” song), only placed two spots below it on the Hot 100.

It’s really funny and interesting how Uncle Kracker (what a stupid name) came out of the Kid Rock milieu as the turntablist in his backing band (lmao), and then, despite being a rapper, rose to immense adult contemporary fame with “Follow Me” and then a cover of Dobie Gray’s “Drift Away” (🎶Give me the beat boys and free my soul🎶). It also seems like Kid Rock kinda followed in his footsteps too, dropping his brash, working class, trailer park asshole gimmick for a quick sec to make “Picture” with Sheryl Crow the following year 🤔.

Remember “I Do!!” by Toya? It was her only hit, but that catchy, midtempo R&B groove was 🔥. Produced by this guy Antoine “Bam” Macon, who then went on to co-produce Nelly and Kelly Rowland’s “Dilemma.” Toya would release one more single after this one, which didn’t fare too well, and then she’d appear on Cam’Ron’s 2002 classic, “Hey Ma,” before falling all the way off.

We gotta talk about Willa Ford too. It shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone that the people who produced “I Wanna Be Bad” also produced a bunch of songs for Britney Spears as well. Willa says she wasn’t trying to copy Britney, but damn, does this sound like a Britney song! Also, what on earth is Eminem friend-and-foe-and-friend-again Royce da 5′9″ doing on this?!?!?

Oh yeah, and we can’t ignore this from Willa either:

That article was then followed up with this:

Which then allows for the perfect use of this meme:

Is there a stronger trio of singles to come from a rap album than the one that came from OutKast’s Stankonia? I mean, how can you beat “B.O.B.,” “Ms. Jackson,” and “So Fresh, So Clean”? I really don’t think you can. The production group of Organized Noize had a large hand in OutKast’s first four albums, and one of their members, Sleepy Brown, also provides the falsetto parts on the chorus for “So Fresh, So Clean.”

Why wasn’t Craig David a bigger thing in the US? He could’ve been our British R&B king, but he only wound up with two successful singles here with “Fill Me In” and “7 Days.” “7 Days” actually performed better on the Hot 100, but I feel like “Fill Me In” is far more remembered in the States. Anyway, despite his brief showing here, he managed to stay relevant all the way into the 2010s back home. Awesome voice and great beats.

Lastly, Dido’s “Thank You.” This song took such a long path to reach #3 on the Hot 100. It actually first came out in 1998, appearing on the soundtrack to an indie flick called Sliding Doors that starred Gwyneth Paltrow. Then, in ‘99, it was included on Dido’s debut album, No Angel. Following that, Eminem released The Marshall Mathers LP in 2000, which included “Stan,” a song that made the chorus from “Thank You” its own. Naturally, that helped to increased the popularity of “Thank You” itself and Dido then released it as a single in September of 2000. Then a couple months later, Eminem released “Stan” as a single too. Finally, in January of 2001, “Thank You” entered the Hot 100 at the #80 spot, and by April it had climbed all the way up to #3. It then stayed on the chart until September and became one of the biggest hits of 2001.

What a fucking nostalgia rush this whole thing was. Radio was at its absolute peak in these days. Just so many good and fun songs. Take me back!

More of these installments from Totally Hits and Now in the near offing, so if you enjoyed this post, stay tuned!

Highlights:

Blu Cantrell - "Hit 'Em Up Style (Oops!)" 112 - "Peaches & Cream" Missy Elliott - "Get Ur Freak On" P. Diddy, Black Rob and Mark Curry - "Bad Boy for Life" Dream feat. Kain - "This Is Me (Remix)" Usher - "U Remind Me" O-Town - "All or Nothing" Eve 6 - "Here's to the Night" Uncle Kracker - "Follow Me" LFO - "Every Other Time" Sugar Ray - "When It's Over" Willa Ford - "I Wanna Be Bad" Toya - "I Do!!" OutKast - "So Fresh, So Clean" Ludacris feat. Shawna - "What's Your Fantasy" Craig David - "Fill Me In" Dido - "Thank You"

P.S.: I wrote a long Twitter thread about almost all of the songs on this album. I only covered a little more than half of them here in this post, so if you want more observations and fun trivia, check it out!

#r&b #r & b #hip hop #rap #pop #pop rock #rock #music #2000s #2000s music #2000's #2000's music #00s #00s music #00's #00's music #90s #90s music #90's #90's music

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