#anyway I dunno if i'll post more for this
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Some Fords! (and Martin K Blackwood is also there)
#Some Ford wips I'm working on! I'll probably post these all seperately later. I dunno yet. just wanted them out of brain jail#The TMA crossover drawings are inspired by a fic which I cannot find the name of right now BECAUSE AO3 is DOWN????#anyway I got more drawings for it I'll post all together later#also I haven't listened to protocals yet and I need to relisten to the og so I hope I remembered Martin's level of lonely avatarship lmao#Also I just think Ford would be a bit mean to himself. ESPECIALLY his immidiately post Fiddleford leaving self#conflicting thoughts of 'I cant risk changing the timeline' and#'I was a miserable self centered idiot and Im afraid I still am so I need to to put my younger self down to feel better'#Gravity falls#Stanford pines#ford pines#young stanford pines#gf fanart#fanart#fan art#my art#digital art#martin k blackwood#the magnus archives crossover#Edit: the fic was 'earth becomes sky in the most literal fashion'!!
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So I watched Cybersix
#knox rambles#KNOX EDIT (me)#Cybersix#Cybersix AMV#i like it#it has the vibes (disclaimer: excluding ep 4 which i am acknowledging its problematic existence and separating it from the rest of the show#Been told by multiple people this has trailer vibes and I aint' complaining#they right#Me: i dunno if i'll post this#my buddies: you freaking genius this is so cool#me: [surprised pikachu meme]#i 100% have gender envy @ Adrian#we WISH we had that much swag#both Adrian and Cybersix out-swag us all#anyway yeah not my usual monkie or ninja stuff but i needed something new so spent a day binge watching this show#me posting content for old obscure shows? its more likely than you think-#the song's called Business of Danger if anyones wondering
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Turns out snapping turtles are super hard to draw. Oh well
(Extremely lose "lore" thoughts in tags i guess lol)
#lo rambles#ok i'll try to make sense of this#100% would have benefited from doing some studies on turtles but alas. i have a day job#and i wanted to get it done#anyway snapping turtles kinda freak me out with that SUPER sharp beak and all. i think thatd work pretty nicely#for strag the design is rather straightforward#i distinctly remember thinking the hair was straight up just stylized locs so thats what i went for#i thiiiink there was something with the underneaths' culture around mushrooms/molds too?#i thought itd be fun if thats what gives it the colour. different strands of fungi/molds and all#also some more scars cause i am pretty sure i remember his job being described as the most dangerous one out there#so it only makes sense#might have to make another post to really show that off if theres interest but yes#overall battlescars#blinded in the right eye cause why not thats always interesting and fun to see someone adapt to#especially someone who fights a lot#yea i think thats kinda all#mightve been the first ever blorbo i loved that shit when i was 6. a lot#i dunno how to tag this dont look at me#magi nation#strag
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CoD OC Dump #1 - [Black Ops Edition]
Decided to cure my art block by doodling all of my OCs so that I have an excuse to talk about them. Started off with my many CoD characters, so here's the first set. Names and info under the cut.
[Goes upper right -> lower left -> upper middle -> lower middle]
Joanne Locklear — Because not everyone has to be the most epic soldier or spy to ever soldier or spy, Joanne is one of my civilian characters.
A med-student with a clinical interest in neurology (and a personal/non-professional interest in psychology) only partly because of her husband (drumroll, please), Alex Mason. She's my OC version of Mason's wife.
Her parents own and run a bar & grill in Fairbanks, where she works part-time when she's not busy with school, and her father happened to have grown up and served in World War II alongside Mason's father. They were friends because they were the same age, they were classmates, and also because when they were little their dads made them. She's half-Alaskan Athabaskan through her mom, half-white through her dad.
Lillian Scott — An analyst in the CIA with a specialty in linguistics and a knack for codes as well, her main role in my fanfic series is to serve as a translator, gather intelligence, analyze said intelligence, and so on and so forth. She serves a mainly supporting role as far as operations are concerned, and she's fine with that. After all she is a scrawny little nerd (affectionate) and although she can fight if necessary she isn't exactly great at it. It's too much for her poor constitution.
A fun fact is that she can actually shoot really well (girl is Appalachian born and raised, she grew up hunting, what did you expect) it just hurts her hands and she kind of needs those. Also she's paired with Weaver because if you know me then you know that I love me a man with an eyepatch and a tragic complex backstory.
Nadezhda "Bell" Belkina — An OC!Bell because you can't give me a faceless protagonist and expect me NOT to make a very long and intricate backstory for them (if you know about my AC fanfics then you know exactly what I'm talking about). Abandoned on the streets, taken in by Perseus, something of a prodigy, then brainwashed by Adler through the MKUltra program...you know how it be.
She and Woods end up bonding over the fact they both spent their childhoods on the streets.
Claire Anderson & Michael Isaacs — AKA Svetlana Andreyeva and Mikhail Isakov, both KGB operatives planted in the U.S. to assume American identities, their job was primarily to track down and kill rogue operatives/traitors. The problem with that is that both of them ended up really liking their fake lives in America, and were tempted to defect. Claire defected to the CIA, Mike/Misha was killed before he could. By Russell Adler no less.
Oh, and speaking of him, Claire is his ex-wife. She wasn't his ex until after he shot Mikhail, though. And then tried to shoot her too. Yeah, you can see why their marriage went up in flames. Somehow they worked out their problems enough to work together in the 80s...and again in the 90s. RIP Mikhail though.
#artists on tumblr#call of duty#black ops#fan character#call of duty oc#oc: joanne#oc: lillian#oc: nadezhda#oc: claire#oc: mikhail#lots of canon x oc. there's more where that came from y'all strap in#i was gonna wait until i'd finished every cod oc I have and then post it#but i'm impatient and have hardly posted at all this year#so i decided to split them up based on the game they're from#bo is first because it's oldest. ghosts will probably be next because it's my favorite. dunno if I'll bother with mw#if i do i might just draw my favorite ocs from the bunch i dunno#because i have some minor/side ocs made for that#probably gonna end up drawing them anyways just because i like show and tell :P
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again and again i find myself lamenting that audio roleplay isn't taken more seriously by some people. like yeah, they often have a romantic element, and by nature they usually directly involve/address the listener- and i totally get that those things aren't to everyone's taste. no art or entertainment is universally appealing, and that's okay! but.. it still makes me a lil sad that the "cringe" reputation of asmr/audio rp precedes it. there's a whole lot of talent and creativity being poured into these audios by so many people that i feel goes unrecognized and/or disrespected simply due to the medium that the stories are being told through.
#this post brought to you by: me bingeing Sam & Darlin's entire storyline over the past few days and having a Lot of feelings abt it#asmr#audio roleplay#rp audio stuff#redacted audio#anyways i don't have a conclusion to this post. and i'm not Mad or Upset or anything i'm just thinkin' out loud#and i mean it's not like it doesn't get plenty of praise within its respective audience bc it does. at least for the more popular creators#but i feel it'll still always have the shadow of its cringe reputation looming over it#which makes it hard for some ppl to openly appreciate or share with others that aren't already fans of the medium#like do u know how many comments i've seen along the lines of 'this is great but i'd die if anyone knew i liked this kinda stuff' ?? :(#idk maybe i feel strongly about it bc i'm a self-insert fanfic writer. and i feel like the two have a lot in common. including a bad rep.#like. not every audio will be well-written or produced and neither will every fanfic. but that doesn't mean it's a less legitimate artform#and i'm lucky to have never (yet) received negative comments on my work. but that doesn't mean that it doesn't make me sigh when people-#-say shit like 'this reads like fanfiction' as a way of calling something bad. or other similar sentiments that make the same implication#and i wouldn't be surprised if audio creators feel the same way when they encounter certain comments or statements#like. those YT videos where ppl will 'try bf asmr for the first time' or whatever and it's just 20 mins of cringing and over-reacting? eugh#tbf i haven't watched many bc why do that to myself. so Maybe there's some that are respectful but still. imagine getting roasted like that#and yes yes i know that by posting stuff online you're inadvertently sighing up to be criticized by Anyone but still. man. i dunno#i'm going on a tangent but my point is. i'm grateful for the creators that still make their art in spite of the public's perception of it#bc some of the most impactful emotional experiences i've ever gained from fiction took place in audio rp and i'm so serious abt that.#anyways. this post almost feels like i'm 'making up a person to be mad at' but i promise it's not that serious i'm just yapping. mostly.#certainly not trying to start any kind of debate or anything either i just have a lot of fixation-induced energy and nowhere to put it#this is Eric's fault (/lh) for cooking Sam up in a lab catered exactly to my taste and making Darlin' waaaaay too painfully relatable#but it's also My fault for bingeing the Inversion /and/ the Quinn arc /and/ the Summit all within a couple days. but i can't help myself#feels like i've run an emotional marathon. triathlon. The Emotional Olympics if u will. i'm feeling Everything#who knew that beating the shit out of ur fictional abuser could feel so goddamn cathartic! it's a nice replacement when u can't do it irl#anyways i'm off on a tangent again. thanks for coming to my TED Talk i'm gonna crawl back in my hole now#actually i'm gonna go relisten to a few audios. as Research for my Sam & Darlin' playlist as well as a post i'll be making about it soon#u Know i've got it bad when i not only make a playlist but start Posting on here about the songs that remind me of them. i'm cooked guys.
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#registeel#and now this guy is maybe a bit less interesting. from this standpoint‚ i mean. the eyes being just dots make it a little hard to like#feel *connected* to them when they're ffp'd‚ y'know? i feel like it's kind of a reductive angle. which is why i zoomed this one and the last#one out a bit. so you can see a bit of the rest of their body. it's maybe less funny but would it really have been funny to just see 7 red#dots on a gray background and have to read the tag to know it's registeel? i dunno. maybe. maybe it would've been. but i like this more#maybe the explanation is that i'm taking these pictures myself. i personally know all these pokémon and have to ask them if i have permissio#n to take these pictures of them. but registeel said i couldn't get too close. so we settled with this. hehe yeah that's why :) hehe :)#anyway. you now have the aegis cave theme stuck in your head#hi it's me from the present. saturday morning. in yesterday's queued post i came up with the idea of maybe doing a monotype run of a pokémon#game. i don't know which one yet but i wanted to do water-type. but i was like. maybe i'll liveblog it on my main blog. yesterday#and today i came back and saw those tags as i was queuing up today's 'mons and i was like… hell maybe i could stream it if enough folks are#interested. but if anyone is then i didn't want to wait that long for the queue to get to that post bc that's gonna post on like. august 18#and class for my last semester of college Ever starts back up on august 21st and i don't. know if i want to start another pokémon playthroug#h that close to classes starting. especially not one where at least one (1) individual out there might be waiting for it So i put 'em here#they'll still be on that post but. they're here. just in case someone out there is chronically bored enough that that's something they'd be#interested in. y'never know there's a lot of folks here#anyway i will now queue up kricketot. see you then… or i guess see you whenever if you like send in an ask or a message or smth…
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good morning!! <33
#plans are similar as usual :3#maybe i'll write more today? or at least reblog an ask game to do#:3#otherwise i dunno#i wanna add a new f/o tomorrow#and like i need one more tag (bc I'm going to add jiaoqiu as a platonic like along with him)#i'll probably separate the posts but *shrugs*#...i really should start posting old fics i have#like i read some old astarion stuff last night (and though I've barely focused on him this year I'm still proud of the fics; you know?)#also i have like zayne & sylus stuff i haven't posted so...#might try to figure out a posting schedule (or at least a vague one)#anyways~ i hope today/tonight is kind to you!! <333#morning rambles
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Head in my hands wondering if I'll have to cut the entire Chume Labs section out because it's more suited to being a different chapter, but also knowing the next chapter can't have it either so I might have to cut it from this fic entirely aaaAAAAAAAAAA
#i talk#fic talk#I was thinking I could stay up a while and try to finish this chapter so I could maybe post it tomorrow#but this is really eating me up#On the one hand... a solely Fuga chapter would be great#on the other hand... this chapter is supposed to show their growth from Fuga to the Chume Labs era#(even if it IS 99% about Fuga)#because that's what the chapter's theme is about#Agh#I'll keep chipping away at things regardless#Anyways for folks who like numbers#so far of everything I've already written / edited I have 5588 words#If I solely make this a Fuga chapter there are 1135 words left in my draft#meaning the final total of the chapter will be around 7000 words more or less since I tend to add a lot more stuff when I'm editing#I've got 1870 words (approximately) written for the Chume Labs section#which means if I do the entire Fuga + Chume Labs part this chapter will probably be just under 10000 words#@ __________ @#Maybe I should split this chapter up and make the Chume Labs part an interlude#Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm#Or maybe I'll throw it in Chapter 4 after all. Hell I dunno#We'll see how I feel once I finish editing all the Fuga stuff#I'm pretty happy with the Fuga stuff though but oh boy did it kill me#I think the reason I'm waffling about the Chume Labs bit is because technically it wasn't supposed to be included in this chapter#I had the idea two (?) ish weeks ago and went ''Wait that's a great idea to add''#which is how 99% of my writing goes and is one of the reasons why everything takes so long lol#But anyways. Yeah it's looking like no chapter update today (or I guess tomorrow depending on your timezone)#Sorry guys!#But it's almost done
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-.-
#i am reading some stuff in the agatha tags#i know not a great idea#i just thought since I've been enjoying the meta posts atleast some of them I'll just keep a lookout for it#but as usual#the bs comes through#i have not seen one person who is mad coz agathario not been the focus#so either I've blocked all the idiots#or more likely people are preemptively policing others#which i guese is bound to happen but boy does it annoy me#i really don't care about them being endgame or getting happy ending or whatever#i felt the fandom as a whole also understands that and are just enjoying the ride#it's still mcu#we can be cautiously optimistic but especially with a story like agatha's#and her and rio's relationship being actually labelled as romantic antagonists#i fail to see how people even think that it's going to end as them getting some sappy happyily ever after or something like that#seriously do people really think that's in the cards#or it's just some wishful fanon thinking#i just want to enjoy the show as a show with all these interesting women characters#maybe i am alone in it but from what I've seen atleast on tumblr it feels the same for most of us here#i dunno what happens on other social media sites and i also actually don't care#it's always been like that especially wlw queer ships so yeah it kinda irritates me#i think i need to filter better and try focusing on the artsy stuff#anyways i am wondering if they will release teaser for next epi or not#I'll prefer to go without knowing anything tbh it is kind of exciting to experience it fresh without any spoilers#lets see#in the meantime i am rewatching the show and getting evermore obsessed with agatha and to some extent rio ha ha!#i am posting too much u can tell i am very invested now ...anybody want to pull me out? no? okayyy..down the road I go...!#i am so gay dude...fml#tag ramblings#for ts
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You ever just want to talk about Bertl,
#i . ooc .#The tags got so long just warning U now!#OK I know his appearance wasn't the longest but like. I'll never stop talking about him because he doesn't get enough credit? rip.#I know it's not really relevant any more because post-timeskip everyone is a lot better but. Referring to everyone's skill as of pre.#Reiner said Bertolt was the strongest of all of the shifters but he held himself back. He came 3rd without giving his all. Or really trying#I hc he held himself back to try not to let too much of his strength show bc people forget he had military training b4 joining the 104th.#And ofc. Also to not bring too much attention to himself bc of who he really is???#The way he mastered his Titan straight away and also has such a good handle on it.#Out of the 3 shifters he was the one that stayed true to the mission. Despite his reluctance he's got the strength and commitment.#People are so quick to say he relies on Reiner too much. And while he does at times. Reiner relies on him just as much if not more. Even if#Reiner doesn't realise it. Bertolt keeps him on track and has no one supporting him at all.#In COTT arc... U see him dodge Mikasa who is an Ackerman and seen as one of the strongest characters in the series...#And the same in RTS. Everyone gets too distracted by Mikasa to actually pay attention to how he dodges her 4 times?? Even tho she attacks#from behind? And the way he lands a hit on her. I just *screams*. I love how many times she tries to kill him. lol#How effective he is when he abandons his guilt and this is sort of irrelevant but. It's so special to me because as someone who is#a quiet person irl round people I don't know well. Who has it brought up a lot. I just adore when a character that remains in the#background just comes out and says enough is so hhhhh I know his reasons aren't good BUT RTS BERT... AH.#Also gotta talk about his marksmanship skills in a thread at some point?? Maybe Mp bert I J UST..#Anyway I might do a cheeky revamp of graphics n icons and that. Dunno yet. Need to actually write that'd be good lol.#This account is a lovebot didn't U know.
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"i'm not disabled" followed immediately by "i've got bad knees and a bad back" is certainly something to read 🤨 you know it doesn't have to be cripling for it to count, right...? it's not normal to be in pain after 15 minutes of standing. ableds can stand for, like, an hour at a time before they need to sit.
i know! i appreciate the concern, but i uh. dunno lol. genuinely i don't know. but i included the afaik ("i'm not disabled afaik" was the original phrase, though i'm not like mad at you for excluding it or anything) because i'm well aware that it's a possibility. it's hard to explain but there's a lot of little things that don't add up to much but are like. noticeable. like i would prefer to do most things sitting, if i could, as a matter of comfort. it would be easier for me. and walking isn't as bad as just standing. i've never been great at taking care of my body, and this has only gotten worse with time. it's hard for me to know what i should read as necessity and what i should read as preference, and how much weight to put on said preferences. like you said, i know it doesn't need to be "if i don't sit down i'm going to collapse" or anything, but where to draw that line between Definitely A Medical Thing That Affects Me More Than Other People and.. not that, i'm not sure. i kinda just thought i was a persistently slightly tired and low energy person, but it doesn't seem bad enough to be chronic fatigue, so...? is it related to the half-diagnosed. idk it's complicated depression (and yes in hindsight i probably should've counted that as disabling but whatever)? idk it's not a rabbit hole i've explored much at all is my point. but i know it's there and uh i guess this was sort of validating in a way anon so.. yeah? yeah👍
#also in reference to the pain after 15 mins of standing thing it's.. usually closer to discomfort than pain? but it's not Not pain either#it's often more like 'oh i should sit down. i wanna sit down. i should sit down' and it's not that frequent but it's like a status effect#and the frequent reminders are only after like 20-30 minutes#sometimes i don't even notice it and sometimes (if i'm bored lol) i'll notice it a Lot#this is not helped by my body being.. iffy at telling me what's going on. it's always too much or too little input with this guy#ahh that rascal. anyway#listen anon 1) uh sorry for going off like this idk if that's like. socially appropriate or whatever but i'm doing it anyway 2) if you've#got ideas i'm all ears. like off the top of your head not like. im not asking you to do research for an internet stranger ok#plus it feels weird saying i could be disabled when i have no idea what it would even be. i mean i think i'd believe someone else if they#said that but it's a classic rules for me and not for thee situation. still working on that#point is i got brain gunk for sure i just don't know how much of the body gunk is because of the brain gunk or smth else#like the possibly-probably autism definitely affects me physically i just don't know exactly what to do with that information#like. am i exhausted bc i'm overstimulated? is it the burn out? or is that a separate thing? or are they working together? etc#anyway yeah got caught vagueposting about my symptoms here's the deep dive no one wanted. for self indulgence purposes :v#no but i think about it a lot with posts like this bc i mean. would an able bodied person react THAT strongly to finding out shower stools#exist? probably not. but who knows for certain#....coming to the conclusion of. probably. maybe. but in what ways specifically? uh. i dunno. i just got them heavy limbs#might be a thyroid issue now that im looking into it. but again this is Not my area of expertise
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hey uh sorry for disappearing yet again for a couple months. don't have much of an excuse, though things have been more stressful than usual, offline life having involved family and hospitals and stuff, but not gonna go into any details, things are better now either way so ye. my way of coping with things have been mostly to just play games (ffxiv mainly, leveling alts and other grinding can be a good distraction sometimes) and nothing else to keep my mind off things, so haven't been able to focus enough to do much of any art at all. I am hoping to get back into the swing of things, I am back on my meds that I skipped out on for like a year due to various reasons, but they seem to be helping again so yeah, fingers crossed that things will work out and such ha
#also any and all social interaction not offline has been nonexistent due to things and I'm sorry for general unresponsiveness#again hoping to get back to being ever so slightly less antisocial at least sometimes#now that things are mostly calm again hopefully things will get easier in general idk lol#also I did actually doodle yesterday for the first time in like two months#just a random doodle of my viera alt that recently got to shb#he's very special to me and is a very good edgy bunboi bean that's been getting a lot of playtime these past couple months#he's very much a comfort alt based on a certain uhhh vibe that's been so important to me lately so idk felt inspired for once ha#so maybe I'll post that later just to post something idk we'll see#but ye fingers crossed I can get back onto the art train again properly soon#bc really more bombeep is not gonna draw itself and I'll be damned if I'm not letting it die just yet even if everyone else has jumped ship#it's my comfort ship and I do whatever the fuck I want art wise so heck yeah more bombeep soon hopefully ha#but ye anyways laters and such#also unrelated but corpse released a new song recently you should go listen to it#it's very good makes me feel really nostalgic and I dunno why#but ye stream DISDAIN on spotify or yt or something or don't you do you ha#ok laters forreals this time mmbye
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22 isn't very much at all, I think.
#5am rambles#anyways ignore this as per usual im just thinking in a post that i'll delete soon. i just worry and writing it helps.#you ever wonder when you'll “grow up'? and then realize youre not even fully grown?#that theres still more to learn in life and that the mistakes you make are just that? mistakes?#that you are still so very very young in a world that is so very very old?#im almost 23. barely a quarter of my lifespan. im still a child in a way- my brain not fully formed.#you ever wonder how many mistakes you can make before you figure something out?#I dont know much of anything really. that's the sad part. and the adults who were supposed to help me learn... didnt.#i was failed. and now im a failure. at almost not quite 23 years old. Maybe i wont be a failure in another few years.#i still have a while to go before I die. I'm not going to waste time thinking about it. im just going to try my best.#I have time. I can learn. Grace and patience are not endless but damn if i dont try to figure things out#first step though is meds and therapy tho. we're done with the pity party. some things you just have to accept are okay#cuz my whole life i was taught that being emotional is a weakness. its pathetic and stupid to be upset or angry about anything.#any time i wanted to show i was upset or angry i was 'wrong'. i was 'selfish' and 'dramatic'#so i suppressed and pretended i was fine. that i wasnt weak and pathetic. that i was good and not an annoyance or burden.#i am not weak. i am not pathetic. i am fine i am fine i am fine you dont need to worry about the inconvenience at your door.#sometimes the shame is so much that i cant look at myself or even think i deserve help. that therapy is for people with real problems.#that i feel like ill just be told im like this for attention or dramatics. that im such a disappointment and selfish too.#ive been a “problem” my whole life to the point i dunno if i CAN be fixed. that anxiety eats me alive every day.#therapy is supposed to give you methods to cope#i dunno if it'll work though. I forget my appointments a lot. i struggle to talk sometimes. i may be autistic but its hard to get diagnosed.#emotions are so hard to figure out.
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After days of fighting my impulse control I have finally caved in and bought Baldur's Gate 3. Ive also taken a few days off, completely unrelated, but now as soon as that game is finally on my pc? Yeah... Will probably do absolutely nothing from the list of things I was supposed to do on those mentioned days off 🙈
#personal#video games#raksh posts#curse that sarcastic asshole with traumatic past vampire elf#how dare he be tailored so damn perfectly as if for me Specifically!!#I saw him and Knew and promised myself I Wouldn’t fall for it but then I heard Astarion's VA in action and fell all the way in#I wanna BITE him and smother him eith affection and I dunno how Im gonna do that but damn me if I won’t#its gonna be a hell of a thing prob too with a more morally-good leaning character but oh well#the game looks just so damn fun too#Ive been watching a gameplay and my brain's been Whirring with ideas for my own character and party comp#think I'll go a ranger bcs I NEED my bow#the road of a bow chose me when I was but a mere child running around with my makeshift bow and arrow pretending to be Legolas#and apparently they get a familiar?? I NEED#maybe they could tank too so I can get my Astarion Gale and Karlach party#mabee switch out Gale for Halsin later on too Im definitely eyeing the handsom druid for sure 👀#and Karlach is such a cutie pie what an adorable lovely gal if there was Poly with her and Astarion who knows#but I have a feeling Im gonna be too obsessed with Astarion and afraid of messing it up by accidently romancing anyone else oof#anyway#if the game catches for me I'll prob disappear for a While#also sorry for all of my moots for not being at all active interacting with VP stuff!#i'l get back to that and reblog/add to queue when this brainrot lets me get a break 😅#and if I dont completely wear out my wrists with playing 🙈
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I'm probably far from the first person to say this, but you can't tell me that this song doesn't just scream Aventurine, c'mon.
#like. i don't even need to explain it do i. the lyrics are Right There they speak for themselves#aventurine#hsr aventurine#honkai star rail#hsr#Seven.txt#music stuff#panic! at the disco#p!atd#another song + character commentary post wow mayhaps i'll start making more of these but i fear people and their Opinions#but whatever. if i don't distract myself with a silly little tumblr post im gonna have a meltdown so. here. character commentary be upon ye#anyways listening to this and thinking of Aven gives me chills every single time i can't help it#as usual if u disagree feel free to keep that shit to yourself this is just my opinion let me have it in peace#Spotify#'oh but it's too Positive! he's actually miserable inside! he wouldn't embody this song that's just the mask he puts up!!!'#yeah ur right. and who said i wasn't talking about the mask#i'm not saying that this song embodies his truest self necessarily. but i think it does suit Some aspect of him#maybe the side that's trying to keep going. the side that picks him up off the floor and pushes himself out into the world day after day#forcing himself to find whatever scraps of hope he can hold onto. the song doesn't say '*Had* to have high hopes' for no reason#i dunno i'm just spitballin here. there's plenty of ways you can see Aven in this song. if u Want to#if you've never peeled urself off the bathroom floor and washed tears off your face while playing the most upbeat song you can find-#-to try and summon the motivation to keep going in spite of how u just spent 20mins wishing for it all to be over. well#well then u just can't understand my vision here
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#cascoon#it's like silcoon‚ but purple and pointy! desperately trying to remember how this one comes about. i'm gonna seem like a fake pokémon fan#i know silcoon and cascoon are both evolutions of wurmple. but i don't remember what the criteria are. is it a gender thing? hold on google#oh. it's just. some hidden personality value. so it's effectively random#y'know what. i think that's better than it being a gender thing. shoutout. but it could be considerably more interesting#maybe i'm just conditioned by the hitmonline to think that every evolution criteria has to be stupid and obscure and insane#or finizen At All#or all the stupid-ass trade evos. do not like trade evos. i do Not like trade evos! i have said this before but i will keep saying it#i just realized i called cascoon purple and pointy as though silcoon was not pointy. i'm not with it at all this morning#i just woke up‚ y'all. can you tell. can you tell i'm not sentient yet. i have to go to work in like an hour and a half and i am Not ready#anyway. i'm gonna get this guy up in the queue and dustox and then take my meds. see you guys in the dustox post#this must look so weird to y'all. since dustox is gonna be either multiple hours or a whole Day after cascoon#but i queue up two to three pokémon at once every morning to keep a good backlog in the queue in case one morning i miss it#which has happened before. it's saved my ass before. and i'm gonna need to use it at the beginning of july#sneak peek for you guys. i'll be heading out of town on june 30th to go to the other side of the country for work. so i won't be around#any posts you see from june 30th to july 4th are gonna be like super duper queued in advance. and i probably won't be able to answer asks#or anything like that. i dunno if i'll do a formal announcement bc no one will even notice but for you dear reader#who read this deep into my mile-long cascoon tags. you now know that i will be out of town from june 30th to july 4th#use this power wisely….
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