#anythings better than a recast lol
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i-only-know-fandoms · 5 months ago
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Carlos's mention in the wedding special and how they handled it was disappointing and vague and, in my opinion, leaves the door open to either fate
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So I took a peak at the Barnes & Noble bonus chapter of Melissa de la Cruz's Beyond the Isle of the Lost and Mal and Evie and Jay and Ben and even Doug are there but there's no mention of Carlos, and I don't know, that really upsets me. The Core Four aren't going to be in the movies anymore, (Disney, though intent on making more movie, at least hasn't sunken as low to recast Cameron, and Dove, Sofia, and Booboo won't return without him) they still exist in the universe (Mal's portrait, this bonus chapter, etc). And it just seems to me, as long as it's not on screen and they're continuing the franchise, Disney should include Carlos in any future books they might appear in
(Which I also believe they should do to continue Mal, Evie, Carlos, and Jay's story. They're intent on continuing the franchise, they've made that clear, and so tossing aside the characters that created it seems callous. Obviously there can be no more movies with them, thus, books. Also, these theoretical books could be for the YA fans of the original trilogy and thus get into the grittier details of the Isle, not the watered down happy ending that made no sense canonically in D3. As many are pointing out, Rise of Red will be for a new generation of fans)
I, personally, think that if they're set on continuing the franchise they should honor they characters should still be used (again, offscreen in books) to continue their stories and the legacies of the characters and the actors who created them, especially Cameron, as this is really his only legacy character. It also gives another way of keeping his memory alive, if they dedicate the books to him, and raise awareness for his foundation by including an page promoting it in the books.
It also seems callous to me to just toss all the work of those characters to the side, like they don't mean anything now that they can't be used in movies.
But, I am also worried want wanting this (or even asking Disney this, though I doubt they'd pay attention) that I am also just using Cameron? I just, I miss him so much, and this would keep him alive (similar to Chadwick Boseman through T'Challa. Like, they had him die in the movies as to not recast him, but there's still all the Black Panther comics and merchandise that he lives through. Yes, it's not necessarily his iteration of the character, since it did exist before him, but he's still connected with it). But should this stay in the fandom through fanfics and fanart, and not touched by Disney? But they're continuing the universe, so feels like this is just forcing him to disappear? Idk, I did another post about this after the Wedding Special, because I don't know if I'm being insensitive by wanting this. I don't think I am, I don't mean to be, but that doesn't mean I'm not.
So I set up this poll, (and set it before my rambling since who wants to read all this, lol) to get some wider perspective. Should I keep asking Disney to try and get the Core four's stories continued in books (if you're on Instagram, yup this is me) or am I being insensitive towards as them by asking for this
(The utter hopelessness of asking Disney and if I should give up because of it isn't in question, I have nothing better to do with my life than scream into the void. But if it's morally wrong.... I trust the fandom for an honest opinion on this and tumblr is the best place. And now we have polls, so......)
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jedinightsister · 9 months ago
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spoilers
also keen to see how river/sid is done in the show! in the books it's kind of like "here's a pair who have a very vague flirtation" to boom undying love when she shows up again lol. saw someone post an interview with the showrunner on reddit where he was asked if they're going to do anything with river/louisa and people were VERY against that lol. while i don't love it there might be more of a basis for that in the books that river/sid (...until river/sid actually happens). they're like the only 2 who seem to genuinely enjoy each other's company (since we were robbed of an emma/louisa bestie era :( )and there's some throwaway lines like louisa wondering how she should feel about river choosing to stay with sid, and if she had a right to feel anything, etc. anyway i'm good with anything as long as olivia cooke comes back, i know she's booked and busy but can't imagine a recast working as well
My response under the cut to avoid spoiling from the books!
first of all...BIG SAME TO LOUISA/EMMA BESTIES ERA please. She was one of the best parts of the books, and they did that really cruel cold open in Joe Country that led to...well... 🥲🥲🥲
Cuz I really like when the Slow Horses have interactions among each other, but also outside of it. And I love that she is the more uhm "stereotypical" beauty type (at least as described in the books) but she is so much more than that.
Emma Flyte my love 💖
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You officially have me even more excited for s4 now 😆 (She and JK Coe are the ones I'm looking forward to most. I hate Claude but I am keen to see him because of James Callis haha)
Okay,,,, back to the topic at hand.... I also agree with the book hinting more of the River/Louisa bond, and truthfully, when I read those parts, I can't decide if I ship it romantically or platonically, or maybe both idk??? But I just like that they are both the "capable" and "level headed" and closest to normal in Slough House haha. I think this is especially highlighted in London Rules, when they attempted to have that "stable" "normalcy" by having River go with JK and Louisa with Shirley. I literally cannot get over the pairings in that book, actually, but maybe I should reserve that for a different post haha
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I absolutely hope we get Olivia back again! Considering s5 has been greenlit, and we get our first hint of her being alive in this book, there is a lot of ways they can setup her reappearance. I certainly think it will help boost our chances for a season 6 if we get a powerhouse like her return to the show 😅🙈
They also have a potential (if they really want to establish some kind of romance on the show) to have a better build up for those two. The only thing I gripe about it, it is they weren't able to sprinkle some of that in River for s2&3. I wish they did, but you're right anon, Liv is booked and busy, so I feel like it can go either way...
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All in all tho, I'm just really happy at how the show adapted the books. They don't necessarily have to keep each story detail beat by beat, but they really captured the essence of how "useless" they all are, but still somehow manage to be involved with, and even solve, the biggest MI5 cases, not even the Park can handle 😆
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Thank you so much for the fun question!! It makes me so happy to talk to someone who loves both book and show like I do 🥰💖
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gunsatthaphan · 1 year ago
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I am so sad about the Mark P situation I hate that it has tainted my excitement for Only Friends I mean I think it is to late in the game for a recast plus when does gmm actually care what their actors get exposed for so I don't expect one, I love First and Khaotung so that is obviously what I am trying to focus on but yeah it sucks I am sure when they actually start filming my excitement will come back because it is not here atm
yeah same... he wasn't my main reason to be excited for the show lol but the situation still sucks.
there's no way gmm is gonna take action especially considering he wasn't the one who said all these things. a second hand scandal if you will. so they definitely won't recast or anything unless he drops out himself. we'll see what happens. it's still a while to go until they start shooting. at least his apology was better than prom's 🤷🏼‍♀️
xxx
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egg-emperor · 2 years ago
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I like how bouncy and fluid Eggman's movement is in Prime, but the voice still throws me. It sounds like someone trying to do an Eggman impression (which seems to be exactly what Brian Drummond did - try and make his voice sound like Mike's). I almost wish they'd had him do his own take on Eggman's voice because Drummond as a voice actor is really good at villain voices. I'll reserve more judgment until we get full episodes, but at the moment his voice is just "off" enough to bug me.
Me too, I absolutely love how he's animated, he's so bouncy and lively and full of the Eggman energy I love in every movement. It's also got me giggling over how handsome he is as usual so they did it right fjsbshgksbgk 🥰💜💕💘
But yeah I really don't feel the same is happening with the voice. I'm not trying to be negative so I realize I haven't actually shared my thoughts on it at all, aside from obviously being sad about how Mike has been replaced as Eggman in an English role in general for the second time (movie first which I was already sad about) and now in animated content for the first time... He's been the voice of Eggman the entire time I've been a fan, except I heard Deem Bristow first and enjoy them equally. They'll always be my two favorites and I know that no others will ever come close for me.
I really wish that they could've just gotten Mike for this. Especially because he's been an exception to the rule before as a non Canadian actor involved with another project and that definitely should've happened again here for such a major long time important role of his. I miss when you knew that with any kind English content, you could expect Mike's voice to leave Eggman's mouth but now that isn't even the case with animated content, it feels so wrong. I never wanted them to switch Mike out for any other English actor at all under any circumstances for as long as he was willing and able to play the role. :')
Mike's Eggman voice is the definitive for him now for almost 20 years of him being the voice of him in English. They brought him back despite the recasting and kept him the longest in English out of any of the English actors for a reason- because he brought so much life and energy to the character just through voice and it's so unique and powerful that nobody could come close to capturing it as well after him. Anyway oops sorry I'm rambling but I still can't get over this I'm just really sad about it and it just feels like a sin to replace him for anything in general to me lol
No hate to Brian or course, I'm sure he does have great voice talent even though I haven't really heard him. But yeah it kind of does sound like that and it's not really working for him. Mike was initially hired to be a Deem sound alike but I feel Deem's is easier to match than Mike's take, as in the first three X episodes he sounded pretty good and close, until the fourth where he decided to start doing his own take. While I still like the former, it was a big improvement when he started doing his own thing that he said was more doable and it worked just as great for the character.
But Brian sounding like he's kind of attempting an impression of Mike makes it sound rather flat in comparison, which I was expecting anyway because damn is Mike's hard to replicate with the gruffness and gravel and highs and lows of his tone at the same time. That's what makes it so great and unique, it adds a lot of life and energy to the character as much as lively exaggerated movement, which makes it the best to me. Even the way Mike performs growls and laughter sounds a lot stronger and emphasized with that energy to suit how theatrical of a villain he is.
But it's especially not helping that Brian's sounds like an attempted impression for those reasons, it probably would be better if it sounded more like he was doing his own slightly different take. I'm trying not to sound negative, I don't hate it and I will give it a chance and maybe he can improve or his performance will actually be pretty good as we hear more. But also I'm always gonna be absolutely biased when it comes to this, so I just know that Deem and Mike are always gonna be my two favorite takes equally and that no other is really gonna be close to delivering the same for me personally lol
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kurtxhummels · 2 months ago
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KURT: Okay, that I can excuse because JK is definitely a huge ick. To be fair, she started giving me the ick before the FB movies were even out, so I can't blame you there. You are DEFINITELY not missing anything. I like to act like Cursed Child doesn't exist. But in terms of FB, we need to make some sort of Wizarding World night where we binge all three movies. KURT: At least....as long as you don't mind me ranting about them recasting Johnny Depp for at LEAST ten minutes. KURT: I need to reread the books myself, to be honest, but I'm fairly certain we only know what the arena was like and how he won. He was damn near dead when he won which definitely stuck with me. I know that his games were another quarter quell where double the candidates were required, and he was 16. And I remember something about a volcano so that would be interesting to see. I remember that he and one of the girls from his distract reached the edge of the arena; then the female tribute left and he discovered that there was a force field on the boundary - which he used to his advantage to win. Okay maybe I remember more about it than I thought I did. 😂😂 KURT: You should watch or read Outlander, though. For sure. It's a great show. The books are pretty good, too; though, admittedly, I'm not done with the books. There are 9 and I've been stuck on book 4 for about a year now lol. The Scottish just enhances everything lol. ESPECIALLY in the show. 🤤🤤 KURT: I mean...vive la révolution could work for sure so we can pretend you haven't dropped anything 😂 If GRRM says that the show's ending is the way he intended it, we are GOING to his house and forcing him to rewrite it CORRECTLY. It really aggravates me with how GOT ended. I can see how they got the way they did - with Dany losing her mind and essentially becoming her father - but if they were going to do something like that it would have been better to make that change slowly. She devoted SO MUCH of herself to freeing slaves and such like that, so when you see her just suddenly more or less go mad...it's just too abrupt. KURT: I will definitely keep that in mind lmao. You do smell nice most of the time. 😉 But knowing that I shouldn't need it for that ep makes me feel better. I'm going to have to give it a try, though. If I love the episode and the zombies aren't too bad, then maybe I'll see if I can convince Dom to watch it with me lol. KURT: YAY! It's nice to know that I'm legally covered. Even better if I have backup. Hopefully he'll climb out and I can push him in again before anyone else shows up.
NICK: It wasn't because I didn't enjoy the first one! It was a legitimately fun watch -- I mostly just got derailed on the rest of them, and by the time I got back around to it JK was starting to give me the ick. That's pretty much exactly what I heard about Cursed Child as well, so it's good to know I wasn't misinformed and I'm NOT, in fact, missing anything.
NICK: I'm gonna have to go back and refresh on what we know about Haymitch's games, it's been a while since I brushed up. And then maybe I'll be ready to catch up with the other prequel before the new one comes out. Oh shoot, I'd forgotten that Outlander was based on a book series too -- that's one that I haven't seen the show OR read the books, I just know it's... Scottish.
NICK: 😂🤣😂
NICK: Intention to revolt noted. I feel like if I knew more about Broadway I would make a reference here -- Les Mis, or something? Let's pretend I'm not disappointing you horribly by dropping the ball, 'kay? Vive la révolution!
NICK: Listen, if you NEED a shoulder to hide in, I've got two of 'em. Just sayin'. I don't think it'll be necessary for just that one ep though -- there's a very good reason Nick Offerman won an Emmy for it, you won't be disappointed.
NICK: I've consulted legal precedent, and yes, yes you can. I'll even back you up. "Why no, officer, he just decided to go for an impromptu swim all on his own, I can't imagine WHY, 🤷🏽‍♂️"
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knchins · 4 years ago
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Hunger - Todoroki S.
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Summary: Todoroki Shouto doesn’t want to follow the footsteps of his father. On the brink of starvation, he hears the call of a witch who finds a way to fulfill both of their needs.
Pairing: Incubus!Shouto x Witch!Reader
Rating: E+
Word Count: 3.6k
Warnings: Sm*t, v*ginal fingering, v*ginal s*x, oral s*x, c*nnilingus, choking, some mentions of (consensual) breeding, soft!dom Shouto, some begging ig, some mentions of sugar daddy/baby, Shouto is several centuries old and is of age, oh and some fluff
Notes: This was my very first request I think??? I got it months ago lol so idk if this person if even still following me RIP. But I had a lot of fun writing it and I hope they enjoy it wherever they are <3 I did deviate a little bit but not TOO much.Censored words is so I can show up in the gd tags.
 Dealing with demons had become sort of a pastime for her, the young witch living in the secluded wood out in the countryside. She greatly enjoyed the remoteness, though sometimes it did come to a great disadvantage. Travelers would come, asking for potions or spell-work, something to help them with their troubles in life. As a grey witch (one who practiced both white and black magic), she tended to be able to help just about anyone with anything. Of course there were a few lines she wouldn’t cross such as raising the dead or directly causing death. She did have some morals after all, albeit somewhat controversial ones.
 Whenever she needed an item that she simply had no access to, then she would call upon demons to aid her in her work. The first couple times she had been a little reluctant and she would be lying if she didn’t say she had a few close calls, but ultimately demons could be bartered with just as humans could. The lower leveled ones were rarely smart enough to outwit her or ask for something she just couldn’t give. So far, dealings were good and they only became better when she met him.
 On the fourth or fifth time she called out for help, this time she needed a rare desert root for a drying spell, she followed the same procedure as always. She lit her candles, drew a summoning sigil on the floor, and chanted the words that would bring her the closest demonic being that felt the urge to heed her call. She specifically did it in a way that powerful demons would not be attracted. In fact, she would much prefer to keep them away for they were much smarter and more conniving, and ultimately not worth the risk. This time though...this time someone with a little more juice than what she normally found herself bargaining with appeared before her.
 Todoroki Shouto was an incubus with the most prestigious lineage of any sex demon that resided in hell. His father was known by all demonic beings. He was number one in his class, The closest to king that anyone of them could truly be. He had also fathered more children than any other demon, enjoying ruining human women to the point that they could no longer be satisfied by mortal men. Shouto found it distasteful. The way Enji wold flux his hormones so that any woman within a few hundred feet would simply beg for him to fuck her, to breed her, to make her his. He had more half-siblings than he could count in addition to the three full-blooded ones. His mother had also been a high class demon with a pedigree, though her whereabouts were currently unknown.
 He was minding his own business, taking a nice walk through the woods in the mortal realm when he heard the call. There was a tugging sensation on his chest and a melodic voice ringing in his ears. It was not a call for someone like him. Someone capable of such true  power. Yet, something drew him in. Something about that voice had his interest piqued. He couldn’t resist answering her quickly, less some other demon came to her first.
 He appeared before her, hair split down the middle perfectly. One half red like his father’s, the other white as his mother’s. One dark grey eye and another a brilliant blue, his white button-down shirt loose fitting with a few top buttons undone to show off his chest. If he wanted to lure in the opposite sex then he could with ease, but Todorki Shouto had a secret. One that made him much less powerful than he could be.
 The witch was taken aback by the demon in front of her. He was certainly the most handsome she had ever seen, most lower level ones were not very pleasing to look at. It made them easier to deal with. Her curious eyes blinked as if to make sure he was really there. Immediately she could sense that something was off about him. Something wasn’t quite right, however she could not pinpoint what it was.
 Shouto regretted answering the call immediately. The witch he had been summoned by was possibly the most beautiful creature he’d ever set eyes on. She was pure beauty and grace, more stunning than anyone residing in hell or earth. In fact, part of him wondered if maybe she was an angel. However the various bottles of herbs and assorted animal parts quickly led him to believe that she was not divine. She was simply mortal and in need of help.
 “Oh an incubus.” She said, still looking very bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. “What a surprise. I’m not sure if you can help me or not. You’re a little out of my league.” The last part seemed like a joke but Shouto wasn’t entirely sure.
 “Why did you call for me here?” He asked calmly, his face perfectly blank though his eyes were fixated on her.
 “I’m in need of something for a spell.” She said honestly, “Sometimes I call upon demons to help me gather items I cannot easily get.”
 “Is that not dangerous?” He asked, starting to look more intrigued than anything. “Do you not worry about your safety?”
 The witch let out a nervous laugh, “Well, lower levels ones aren’t much of a problem for me. You’re a bit more than I’m used to. I’m surprised you even heard it honestly.”
 Shouto knew immediately why he heard it. Because as it stood, his power level was that of some lower tier demon. He had only fed twice since coming of age. His hunger was almost maddening. It had been eating away at him for decades. But he would not be his father. He would not be a glutton for sex and breeding. He refused to follow in his very heavy footsteps.
 “I was simply within range.” He said, though she knew that him happening to be close by to her didn’t really mean much. The spell was designed to not be heard by anyone over a certain power level. Could an incubus really be below that? “What do you need?”
 “A root.” She replied, flipping through one of the many of her family’s grimoires. She found the page that had a drawn picture, name, and general description. “This one.”
 “You’re doing a drying spell.” He said out loud by mistake. He knew because he had had this particular spell cast on him many times throughout the years, though recently it seemed to be working less and less. It was to dry up sexual desire. It was one of the few things that helped him get by so long without feeding. Without it he would have been driven insane by lust many decades ago.
 The witch cocked her head at him curiously, “yes, I am. For a client. She’s tired of having children but her husband just won’t stay off of her. She’s hoping it’ll get him to stop.” She paused for a moment, “Can you get it?”
 “Yes.” he replied dumbly, as if it were totally obvious.
 “What is your price?” She asked then, realizing he didn’t catch the implied question.
 Shouto thought for a moment, it was about time to recast the spell judging by the lecherous thoughts that were starting to cross his mind. “Can you perform another one?”
 She looked perplexed for a moment before it dawned on her why he heard her incantation. He was starved. And he must have been for some time too. “I can but I think I can do something else for you that will be much more beneficial.”
 “And what is that?” Shouto asked, wondering if perhaps there was another spell or potion out there that was more powerful and thus would be more effective.
 “Just have sex with me.”
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 That was how it started. Any time the young witch needed something, she’d do a more specific summoning spell, one that only Shouto could hear. And every time he’d come, no matter what he was doing, to aid her. She would often jokingly call him her demonic sugar daddy because he provided everything for her for the low low price of coitus.
 The first couple times had been a little awkward. Shouto’s abilities were almost dormant. He fumbled his way about her body which was quite embarrassing for a sex demon. However after a few practice rounds the two truly began to find what got the other off the most. And in half a dozen sessions Shouto was feeling power, but with power came hunger.
 When he appeared before her hearth one night, without an invitation, the woman nearly threw an old vase full of nightshade at him in terror. She only put it down when she realized it wasn’t just any random intruder, but her newfound lover. She hadn’t needed anything in quite some time now. Hadn’t called on him because business had been rather slow and the jobs she did get, she didn’t need anything from him. Perhaps it was a little cruel of her to not call on him regardless, but she honestly did not know how much his appetite had grown. How it began to consume him until all he could think about was her, naked and writhing beneath him as he pounded into her. He craved her and only her. It was not something that ever really happened to Incubi. After all they could have anyone they wanted. But he didn’t want anyone else. He only had eyes for her.
 “Shouto.” She breathed out, heart still racing as she set down the clay vase. “I wasn’t expecting you, did you need something?”
 His eyes were fiery as he stepped towards her and she could smell the faint scent of hell on him. She wondered if maybe he had another argument with his father. He had told her a little about his family life during post-sex cuddles. It wasn’t much but she knew he hated the demon that sired him. He always seemed to be wound extra tight after coming straight from hell, and that was usually the reason.
 “Go bend your ass over the bed.” He said, further unbuttoned the flowy shirt he typical wore. Her eyes grew wide, embarrassment heating her face as she took a small step away from him. It wasn’t really out of fear, just a simple reflex. He never really got demanding of her like this, maybe something was wrong.
 But the warmth pooling between her legs told her that despite the interruption, despite having not planned this whatsoever, hearing him order her to get into the bedroom had her flooding with desire, and he could smell it.
 Shouto didn’t really have to use his pheromones to seduce her. He was naturally attractive and had a body that looked as if it had been sculpted out of marble. No, he never used them before but he was definitely using them now and they had her weak in the knees as she trembled. She walked on shaky legs into her bedroom, keeping her thighs pressed together as she walked in an attempt to hide the wetness that was accumulating in her panties. It was pointless though. He could always tell.
 He left his shirt in the living room and kicked off his boots on his way to the bedroom. He lost his pants at the entryway, watching as she leaned over the side of the bed and resting on her forearms. Her eyes large and doe-like at the rush of adrenaline. Sex with with a sex demon was always an unforgettable experience. It was easy to see how people went mad over it. The way he made her feel, the orgasms he gave her, none of it compared to any other lover she had ever had. Perhaps that was one reason why she had been so willing to listen to him just now. She knew he’d make her feel good, and who didn’t like to feel good?
 Shouto padded over, dropping to his knees behind her as he pushed her skirt up over her ass so that the fabric could bunch at her waist. His nimble fingers hooked around the elastic of her panties and he slid them down with an odd amount of carefulness. He practically buried his nose into her sex, inhaling that sweet scent of arousal that had him feeling absolutely feral. His tongue came to prod at her clit, causing a small whimpering sound to come from her.
 He dragged his tongue over every inch of her pussy, savoring it fully until she was a quivering mess with shaking knees that threatened to make her fall down. “Let me breed you.” He said between kitten licks. “You can have anything in return.”
 They had been using protection until then. Sex demons were incredibly fertile and typically had no trouble creating offspring. But at the time when this started, Shouto didn’t want to sow his wild oats like his father had. This witch had him wanting to throw all of that to the wind. He just didn’t care. That drive to fuck without any sort of barrier was maddening.
 Anything from a demon was a very big price tag, and Shouto had never tried to deceive her. He had never been anything other than honest. And despite all her teachers to never trust a demon, she found herself trusting him. Every time their bodies intertwined she fell more and more in love, no matter how much she had tried to resist. She had thought some distance would have helped ease her feelings, but apparently it had been hard on both of them.
 “Y-yes,” She gasped out as he latched onto her clit to suck, “Ple-please, Shouto, fill me with your cum.” She was gripping the old quilt on her bed tightly to try and keep herself grounded, but the way he was eating her out, two lithe fingers now dipping into her dripping core made it impossible to even think straight. All she could think about was her simple need to have him inside of her.
 He didn’t stop working his fingers or tongue until she hit her first peak, moaning out for him in a way that had him nearly cumming prematurely. The strain in his underwear was painful now as he throbbed with need. After one long lick along her slit he stood up, grabbing onto the globes of her ass for pretend support.
 “Tell me what you want me to do, Little Witch.” He said as he pulled down his briefs and kicked them away as if they were the most offensive thing in the world to him. “You’re shaking like you want to say something. So say it.”
 “I need you,” She said, somehow sounding out of breath despite not having done anything besides orgasm. “Shouto, I need you so much.” He wrapped one hand around his cock, pumping in slowly as he watched her continue to tremble. “Please fuck me!”
 The amount of lust he was feeling for this one mortal woman was dizzying. No one had ever told him that one person could have this kind of effect on a demon. Neither his father nor his two older brothers. Was it that far fetched to think that something was happening to him that had never happened to them before? They all had a primal drive for sex but never towards one specific person. Shouto found that he desired no one else in any of the realms. He only wanted her.
 He pushed it without any hesitation, feeling her tense suddenly at his thickness stretching her out. He watched with fascination as he disappeared inside of her cunt, the warm, wet feeling enveloping him like summer rain. “Fuck,” He couldn’t stop himself from cursing and just how amazing it felt to be inside her. It was like taking that first breath of fresh air after being held underwater for an extended period of time. It was so damn freeing.
 The witch relaxed against the mattress, her eyes closed to focus on that beautiful feeling of him completing her with his cock. Shouto took hold of her hips to keep her upright and steady as he pulled out slowly before bottoming out all over again, her slick making for the best lubricant as he moved with ease.
 It started slow. Shouto wanted to revel in the heat. He wanted to drink in the feeling of her walls clamping down around him. The sound of her tiny whimpers when he pushed all the way in after pulling out. But this was much too slow for her, she couldn’t handle such a torturous rhythm. Shouto had eternity but his little mortal did not. Her time was limited and the thought of that made his heart suddenly ache.
 “F-Faster,” She dared to mumble to him, sometimes he’d punish her if she begged too much. If she didn’t let him enjoy himself properly. Today was not one of those days though. Today Shouto wanted to hear her cry for his cock.
 So he obliged, increasing his pace as his fingers dug into the flesh of her hips. His witch began to moan even louder as he hit that sweet spot again and again, making her dizzy with ecstasy. She never lasted long when it came to sex with Shouto, something he took great pride in. He loved nothing more than to give her multiple orgasms.
 But this view just wasn’t doing it for him. He pulled out abruptly, making her cry at the sudden emptiness. He flipped her over onto her back, ripping at her blouse so that it was torn wide open for him. Then he tugged down her bra to free her breasts before reinserting himself into her. He watched her face contort with pleasure, the glossy look in her eyes as he began to pound into her at a relentless pace. The hypnotizing way her tits bounced with every thrust, they were just so perfectly in sync with one another. It was the definition of beauty.
 Shouto brought a thumb to her clit, lightly pressing on it in a way that had her clamping down on him even more. It was as if she was trying to suck him in deeper, never wanting to be without him again. He grunted at this sensation, eyes burning with lust as her mouth made that perfect “o” formation with her eyes rolling back as her second orgasm overcame her.
 He never talked much during sex, choosing to be a silent observer. Every now and then he’d give a command or order, but that was about it. He had never been much one for dirty talk like his father or eldest brother. The witch was fine with this. He made it hard enough for her to think without adding the pressure of comprehending something as complex as language.
 Just when she thought he might be coming to his end, he increased his pace even more. She whined, still feeling incredibly sensitive from the first two orgasms. At least he had the decency to take his thumb from her aching clit. Instead he reached up and wrapped his hand around her bare throat, squeezing just enough to lessen the flow of oxygen and blood to her brain.
 She gasped for air, her moans less audible now as air came out in strangled puffs. He would loosen just enough to give her a small break before tightening back up again. She grabbed at his wrist, and he waited for her sign that it was too much. A double tap anywhere on his body with her pointer and middle finger, or their safe word if she could manage it was all he needed to tell him that he’d gone too far. But neither came and so he continued to abuse her pussy with a pace so fast no human could possibly keep up, and only when she was screaming his name a third time did he finally release himself.
 Shouto came inside her for the very first time. Normally he pulled out even with a condom on. He really wanted to take no risk. This time, this time he had to claim her as his somehow. If any other demon were to come to her then then they’d smell him all over her. They’d think twice before crossing a Todoroki, that was just how well known his family was.
 He removed his hand from her neck, before leaning down to kiss it softly. His nose nuzzled the underside of her jaw in a way that might have appeared to be loving if either of them knew what that word really meant. Her heavy breathing slowly calmed down, delicate fingers squeezing his biceps with care. A simple sign to tell him that she was alright and that he did good. She had found that sometimes he needed encouragement. Sometimes he wasn’t as confident as he pretended to be. But small reassurances were really all he needed to bounce back to normal.
 “Can you stay the night?” She mumbled. Any time she asked, any time she was feeling particularly weak for him, he would turn her down. Saying he had other things to do. Saying it just wouldn’t be proper. Making any excuse he could.
 This time Shouto did not move from on top of her. His mound clouded with the afterglow of such an intense orgasm. He knew then that he’d do anything for her. Anything at all. And because of that realization he hummed back a simple affirmative. He’d stay as long as she would have him.
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plasticnightmaredoll · 4 years ago
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So, the "Justice League" finally got its own movie, eh? Oh, that thing from 2017 was just trash. It's gone. We don't need to look at it anymore.
But in all seriousness, it's great people called out for the Zack Snyder cut of the movie and actually got it! And, yes, it is a vast improvement over the Joss Whedon cut.
Now, my feelings about the DCEU have been pretty divided:
I actually did enjoy "Man of Steel" and found Superman to be relatable and likable for once (I'm not a Superman fan and don't come for me)
"Wonder Woman" was very entertaining and easily the best entry for me in the movie series so far.
"Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice" was a hot mess. Lots of good ideas but it was executed poorly. It felt kind of cheesy at times, especially that whole "Save Martha" thing. Jesse Eisenburg is not a convincing Lex Luthor. Ben Affleck is not a good actor and is a terrible Batman/Bruce Wayne. He's not as bad as George Clooney, but he's not much better either.
"Wonder Woman 1984" was a massive glow-down. Poor quality writing, Maxwell Lord was a weak villain, Cheetah was laughable, and the ending was so goddamn corny! Not to mention, it took ages for anything interesting to happen, and what was the deal with Steve Trevor possessing another dude's body? I mean...what?
Haven't seen "Suicide Squad" in its entirety but I do know and have seen enough to decide that it's a huge misstep. Haven't seen "Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn)" either but I have some interest in it so perhaps someday.
Haven't watched "Aquaman" but probably will eventually but I'm just not very motivated to see it. I like Jason Mamoa as Aquaman/Arthur Curry, but...I don't know. The trailers didn't really grab my attention.
The 2017 Joss Whedon version of "Justice League" was terrible -- worse than "Batman v Superman," worse than "Wonder Woman 1984." I thought the movie moved too quickly, lacked proper character development, and had some bad CGI (I mean, Mustache Gate, am I right?)
Onto the Synder Cut for "Justice League!" Spoilers ahead, of course:
These are really a collection of thoughts, opinions, and observations I had while watching the movie. I have only seen the 2017 film once and honestly don't want to watch it ever again, not even to "refresh my memory" of some details.
Steppenwolf
Steppenwolf was such a pitiful villain in the Whedon Cut. The CGI for him was terrible, and he looked like some weird dude in armor. His personality and motives were paper thin as well. He was a throw-away, token villain, and the only things memorable about him was his name and voice.
In the Snyder Cut, not only was Steppenwolf's CGI much more refined, his character design was imposing. His armor seemed to be alive, too, always shifting slightly, this way and that, which was an impressive sight. His motives, while nothing too deep or extraordinary, gave him a little more depth: he pissed off Darkseid and had to make up for it, and was clearly afraid of what could happen to him if he failed.
The name and voice obviously were still memorable but combined with the other improvements to his character, they were icing on the cake.
That being said, I don't think Steppenwolf is as intriguing or even remotely sympathetic as Loki and Thanos in the MCU.
Darkseid
Was Darkseid even mentioned in the Whedon cut? I can't remember and I don't want to watch that shitty movie again just to find out. However, I don't recall Darkseid making an appearance or even being spoken of in the 2017 version. Now, I haven't read DC (or Marvel) comics, so I don't know a lot about the guy, but he is supposedly one of the more iconic villains.
His motives are pretty simple, though: command and conquer. There isn't a lot of depth so far in the movies but he does pose a much larger threat than Steppenwolf did. You could tell Steppenwolf was intimidated by Darkseid, who was about as cold and menacing as they come. He's a complete villain in that regard, having no emotions and only seeking power for himself.
He looked great in the Snyder Cut. He was actually really fucking scary-looking. He made the beefcake Steppenwolf look like a puppy.
I'm glad that Darkseid made an appearance, even if he didn't fight the Justice League. It alludes to a much broader story, as well as foreshadows an epic boss fight down the line -- assuming the Snyder Cut is popular enough to convince the studios to make a direct sequel and not just abandon things in favor of some sort of soft reboot.
Superman/Clark Kent/Henry Cavill/Mustache Gate
Let's get this out of the way: Henry Cavill is hot af.
Ok, now that we got that out of the way, hooray for Snyder for getting rid of those nasty reshoot scenes involving Henry's CGI'd mouth! Can't say I missed them, you know? I mean, in the 2017 Whedon Cut, you could always spot reshoot scenes based on whether or not Henry's mouth looked normal and totally strange.
I think the 2017 movie had Superman grab Batman by the neck and ask, "Tell me: Do you bleed?" I'm relieved that was removed from the Synder Cut because it added too much of an evil tone to Superman, and we could clearly tell he was most upset with Batman upon being revived.
One massive problem with the 2017 movie was that it made every member of the Justice League look like bumbling idiots without Superman's help. It was downright embarrassing and unrealistic. I mean, you're telling me that Wonder Woman, a goddess, can't take on Steppenwolf? Or Victor Stone, a cyborg with incredible abilities? Making Superman key to winning isn't the problem, it's how it was done in the 2017 movie. He's already OP but that shouldn't mean his comrades have to be useless in comparison.
Superman was allowed to be OP in the Snyder Cut without making his team look incompetent. Like in the Avengers movies, everyone in the Justice League had a purpose and all of them worked together to defeat Steppenwolf. Superman obviously was key to winning, but, again, it wasn't like he was the only capable one during the battle.
I did like the black suit. It's kind of ominous but also very cool at the same time. But is it also foreshadowing something? I don't know...I haven't read the comics so I really don't have any idea lol.
Batman/Bruce Wayne/Batfleck
One glaring issue I still have is Ben Affleck is a mediocre actor at best and he's a terrible Bruce Wayne/Batman. I mean, they couldn't have found anyone else? Someone with, like, good acting abilities?
Martian Manhunter
This whole time -- THIS WHOLE GOTDAMM TIME -- Martian Manhunter was hiding in plain sight! General Swanwick, who I remember from "Man of Steel," IS Martian Manhunter. I didn't see that coming. I mean, I knew Martian Manhunter would appear in the Snyder Cut but I didn't know he'd have an alternate identity, let alone that of an existing character in the DCEU.
As much as I did like seeing him, I am glad he didn't play a big part because the movie already has plenty of characters as is, and introducing yet another one could have slowed things down and taken away from developing the plot.
The Runtime/Pacing
I mentioned already that the Whedon Cut felt rushed and needed much more time to develop its characters and plot. While I had doubts about whether or not making "Justice League" four hours long would be a good idea, it turns out that it was just what the story needed.
Character development was actually existent, and Cyborg/Victor Stone received a detailed backstory, and Flash/Barry Allen got some extra tidbits added to his character's story/background as well.
I actually thought Victor was a fascinating (if a bit tragic) character in the Whedon cut and was disappointed that he just sort of, like, popped up and fought alongside the other Justice League members with the tiniest amount of depth.
Despite an epic 4-hour runtime, it didn't feel slow, nor did it feel like any scenes were "filler." Every scene had a purpose and kept the story moving at a steady, comprehensible pace. It felt more like a 2.5-3 hour movie, honestly, which is a feat since pacing can often be one of a film's biggest issues ("Avengers: Endgame" also accomplished this feat with its 3-hour runtime feeling more like 2-2.5 hours but with no negative side effects of that). Breaking the movie into chapters, including an epilogue was a tad strange because it's not a very common thing, but I think it helped break up the epic 4 hours into separate, manageable but still cohesive pieces. Also, they helped easily transition from one portion to the next smoothly without any awkward cuts.
The Flash/Barry Allen/Ezra Miller
Barry still amused me in the Whedon Cut. He brought some good-natured humor and charm to the movie, preventing it from being too brooding and intense.
I think Ezra is a talented actor and does well in the Barry Allen role but he is, unfortunately, a problematic person. I mean, if he gets recast, he gets recast but hopefully, they pick someone else who has some acting abilities worth noting (i.e. Not a Ben Affleck type of actor)
The Final Battle
It was a huge improvement over the 2017 cut, as everyone was key to winning the final battle, not just Superman. It is meant to be a team of costumed heroes defeating a villain, not just one OP member of the team outdoing everyone else.
That being said, I felt that the final battle was a little bit anti-climatic. I don't know what it was but I just thought that it would be longer? I expected more to happen? More fighting? Not sure how to describe it, but I do feel like it wasn't as impressive as it could have been.
The Epilogue
A dystopian future involving an evil Superman and Joker somehow working WITH Batman was just...crazy. I mean, evil Superman, I can believe, but Joker and Batman working together (even reluctantly) is quite a sight.
Based on what I've been reading, this nightmare Bruce has could be setting up not one but two sequels for "Justice League." I would like to see how things will play out even if things get kind of dark. I'm getting the impression that Darkseid will kill Lois Lane, thus breaking Superman emotionally and making him compliant. That is unless Bruce intervenes in this timeline and prevents that from happening...but at the expense of his own life. Oh dear...
I definitely enjoyed the Zack Snyder version of "Justice League," and would definitely watch it again and again and again. I already have forgotten the majority of the Whedon Cut, and after seeing Synder's version, I think the 2017 movie will be rendered null and void. I hope it is just expelled from the DCEU canon entirely. That, and we get the "Justice League" sequels, preferably from Zack Snyder (Say what you want but I think he is a pretty good director for the most part and seems to really care about this work).
I honestly want to see a fight between the Justice League and Darkseid because I think that's what we're trying to build up to, and seeing as how Darkseid is one of the legendary villains in the DC comics, I would be extremely disappointed if this doesn't come to pass.
Also, as much as I like Batman/Bruce Wayne, seeing him sacrifice himself to save the team, including Lois and thus Superman's sanity, would be something else. It would bring everyone even closer together, for one, and I think that the negativity shared between Batman and Superman in the past would be completely forgiven. I'm not saying there isn't forgiveness now, but dying to save Superman's wife would change everything....if that makes sense? Does it make sense? I'm terrible at explaining my thoughts sometimes.
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is-this-just-fantasy · 9 months ago
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[ID: A screenshot of Tumblr tags that says: "#agreed but let's not act like nonbinary people are 'allowed' to talk about our oppression or have our own words any more than trans men are #tbqh as a non-binary trans man I feel like I'm expected to make a choice between defending my masculinity or defending my lack of gender #like lol last time I just tried to tag exorsexism on this blog I got hateful anons mocking the term. #The reality is that trans women have been objectified into tokens of oppression while all other trans people have been either overwritten o #recast into aspects of oppression; because the cishetero gender politics of Their Cursed Men And Our Holy Women have been uploaded into #trans gender politics completely unaltered. we are cosplaying the cismen and ciswomen of the 80's and 90's. #while the trans people of 2024 play the cissies Best Hits from the oldies nothing gets better and we get more divided #we claim every other trans person has it better than our niche identity does #we claim other trans people are "allowed" things that our niche identity is not #no trans person is "allowed" anything. we fight for it tooth and nail. we bleed and sweat and cry for our place in the world #and we would do well to remember that. #trans unity." End ID]
@gamblegun please copy and paste this and add it to your reblog!
Trans women are allowed to have their own word for their oppression, nonbinary people are allowed to have their word, butches are allowed to have their word, but trans men are uniquely not allowed? Why? Because trans men/mascs are untrustworthy? Dangerous? Because we don't suffer and must be silenced so our betters can speak? You are a bigot, and frankly stupid.
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m0nster-l0ver · 3 years ago
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My bjd came!! She's adorable, unfortunately she's a recast I only found out after she was ordered! I don't know her sculpt or who the original artist is :( I'll definitely post pics of her later hopefully someone can identify her! I was really scared that learning she wasn't legit was going to cause a issue with bonding but it really didn't at all! I do feel really guilty but that's what I get for lack or research. I hope this didn't harm the artist hopefully it like a old sculpt or that she's from a huge company! I don't know what to do now that I have her! She's on a dresser type thing where all of my dolls are in with my big sister lol dolls! I have a bunch of random stuff for her that I packed just for fun :3.
Things of note! (Good and bad!)
She's pretty well strung as far as I can tell but I also have never owned a bjd just watched things about them and like stringing comparisons! :3
Her eyes are very beautiful, and a perfect color! I requested a different eye color (she originally had yellow) and her eyes are so purple and pretty! The detail is like super cool! :D
Her wig is soft like super soft, it was hard to put on but I'm pretty sure that's because I had no clue what I was doing! It took me like 5 minutes- she also came with a silicon wig cap which is so so cool!! :3
Her outfit is perfect and super detailed! It's soft and nice with really good colors!! I really love her shoes they're just perfect! She also came with underwear which is really good! Everything fit really well!
She's not made of resin she is listed to be made of vinyl! She is super smooth to the touch and it's just a really nice feeling! :D
She was very very securely packaged which is great because the delivery guy decided that shoving her in the mailbox was better than putting her on our doorstep -. -
She's a amazing height! 11.9 inches in fact! I just love that alot :>
Her faceup is super well done and I'm pretty sure the seller actually did it themselves, it's pretty symmetrical and super nice!! Very perfect for the type of styles she'll be in later on!
The seller included a sponge to clean off stains from clothing which was really sweet if them because I never would of thought of that ;-;
Now for the not so good!
I am too nervous to open her head cap but I'm pretty sure her eye putty is the source of the really weird chemical smell that she gives off which isn't super great!
She came in a regular brown box which now that I know she's recasted does totally make sense, I don't really care about fancy boxes but they are cute! So yeah no display box!
Her joints are kinda weird, I think she was supposed to be double jointed in the legs because there's an extra line, but she just bends like a normal joint! She's clicky and that makes me nervous however her chest joint is good!
She's a recast ;-;
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That's pretty much it!! By the by I'm not against recasts as long as they are from huge companies or really old sculpts! Bjds are a expensive thing, my family isn't well off or anything so I feel really blessed to be able to own a bjd regardless of her legit-ness! I'm so happy I finally have a bjd I'm so excited for the future possibilities for her!! With that said, please don't be hostile if you stumbled across this post. At the end if the day we all are in the same community, we should respect others even if we don't see eye to eye!
Anyway, I'm happy to welcome Finch to my family!! I can't wait for the future fun we'll have :3
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norgestan · 4 years ago
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Hello! I was wondering how would you have liked dani to be and how would you have liked the damira scenes to be ? (the changes you would have made to actually enjoy and ship damira)
okay quick bucket list:
recast dani with a muslim actor of color
rewrite the entire s4 script
done :)
with the funny answer out of the way... there’s simply no way that i could’ve shipped damira, i am sorry. it’s truly beyond me. nothing about their dynamic charms me or makes me think they’re better or any different than the superior option for a white/non-muslim love interest, aka amiris. i can even enjoy virihugo despite really disliking the way they got together and most of their clips anyway. (also this is a good post that explains why dani being amira’s endgame LI is a bit of a fucking joke)
however, there are a couple of ways in which i could’ve enjoyed damira narratively. and that requires heavily tweaking dani as a character as well of how their entire dynamic works. i’ve made plently of jokes of how i am Not an og purist but, if eskam had chosen at least one relationship to develop super closely as it was in og, then i would’ve wanted that relationship to be yousana. they’re my favorite pair in skam for a bunch of reasons and most of them have to do with yousef being so in contact with sana’s culture. one big example of that is the last clip of episode 9 where they go on that iconic date: it’s both a slideshow of their chemistry and sensual/romantic tension as a couple, and a showcase of the thing that makes me love them the most, which is their super long conversation about faith and their future. to me, those were the moments lacking in damira because they got too caught up on painting dani as this hyper-realized version of a LI which turned out to be a self-congratulatory asshole who disrespected amira in various ways. there were never instances in which they seriously discussed dani reverting to islam in the future, or actually conciliated their visions of their faith to really show where they were in sync and where they disagreed to start working on it. after watching the yousana date clip, i left with the impression that yousef reverting to islam was a real possibility, but i can’t say the same for dani. the damira ending in particular rewards dani for being the way he is, and the worst thing is that amira practically encourages him to never be a muslim because she loves him the way he is (what the fuck!). moreover, he never showed any interest in following amira’s conditions, never tried to familiarize himself with her culture and friends (he took her to a BAR to meet HIS friends but he’s never even shown bonding with las labass?), never really cared about anything that wasn’t to get amira to be physically intimate with him. see, when i think of the yousana dynamic i see the yousef as someone who can read the sana and therefore know what to say and do, not because he only wants to charm her but because he genuinely cares about her. even sofianne showed some of that on the earlier episodes of skamfr s4, but that’s completely lost on damira and dani in particular. and i’m not gonna pretend that this task is possible to do with a white, christian-raised love interest. for this to work, whoever sp!yousef is has to be way more in sync culturally with amira.
a way to partially solve that issue is to make dani be honest to amira throughout the season. i don’t doubt he’s genuinely into her but then he doesn’t communicate her his doubts about the relationships and lies to her about the whole “the only problem in our relationship is the haters <3″ bullshit that he spews out for three entire episodes. moreover, dani being honest from the start would’ve given amira enough hints (red flags) that dani didn’t really take any of her conditions seriously and he was just waiting for her to be less strict about the terms that he agreed on, and maybe there would’ve been a real critique to the character that 1) didn’t make amira look like an “annoying religious fanatic” (which she wasn’t at all lol) to most of the white audience who sided with dani when the relationship started falling apart, and 2) taught an actual lesson to amira about how would a relationship between a white dude who has no intentions to be muslim in the future would go like. i can understand why eskam still left the question pending on the air as they wanted to give amira an endgame and they probably didn’t want to make it seem like muslim/christian relationships don’t work in the slightest when this is the first mainstream show with a hijabi protagonist in spain... but eh. fucking cowards.
if it’s not obvious by now, to me, the ideal version of damira is the one where they’re not endgame by any means, even going to the point that i really dislike that dani even likes amira back. i would’ve really loved if dani stayed in amira’s daydreams throughout the season, where her idealized version of a childhood friends to lovers story is quickly replaced by a more realistic relationship with someone who actually makes efforts to be with her (cough cough bi!kasim anyone?). in that case, dani can be as douchebag-ey as he was for the entire season, idc, but now the show would really acknowledge that and drive the message that amira deserves someone who’s attentive and respectful and genuinely loving of her. and hopefully say that without making it seem like it’s impossible for muslims to date non-muslims: more like, it’s unlikely for amira to date dani in particular, and only because he clearly has no interest on following on the things that she values the most - which is a message that applies to every relationship, honestly.
if i had free reign on completely redesigning dani’s character and the damira dynamic, then i would make dani way more understanding and have his clumsiness be acknowledged and criticized instead of both the characters and the audience using it as a justification time and time again. he’d show genuine interest in islam, he’d thoroughly discuss boundaries with amira to assure that they’re both comfortable, he’d made sure to safely insert himself on her spaces and not just drag them to bars and basketball courts on every date, they’d have SO many conversations of faith that truly make him a nuanced character and also help flesh out the reasons of why amira loves being muslim. which i think are just ways of dani respecting amira’s agency and showing genuine interest on her besides his initual infatuation, as all the other endgame LIs of the show have done it. i’d completely erase the stupid “uwu islam won’t let me kiss dani/viceversa” plotpoint from existence, for SURE. with all of those changes i would be neutral on the existence of damira as i am with virihugo, i think. but also the thing that truly holds me back is that... just, the lack of characters of color in the show. with the way kasim was only used as a plot device and dounia was written out off her best friend role very early in, we truly don’t even have a significant presence of muslim people of color in amira’s season. whitewashing yousef is a big part in that too, and that’s why people were so eager to believe that kasim could’ve been amira’s endgame for this season.
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callhimevan · 4 years ago
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If the writers do kill off Eddie then they will have a problem. I will start a riot. I have also never actually truely looked at 9-1-1 twitter. I have only ever look here on tumblr. I just think 9-1-1 tumblr is much more peaceful and nicer.
I will also start a riot anon lol! But in reality, I would honestly feel so gutted if they did kill off Eddie because there are so many people involved in his story who have breakthrough representation, like Christopher! Having Gavin on the show really brings a lot of inclusivity and happiness to the show and brings them a lot of interesting story lines (especially in the future! they can delve into both disabilities in growing children, but also single fatherhood)! But Gavin is not the only good representation either! There is a lot of Latinx representation that comes from his story, including Eddie himself, and Carla is within his story too! Simply killing off Eddie has a lot more implications than just Ryan, it also involves all of the people within his storyline, and that is just not fare to them, or the people they represent. This is why if they continue to give Eddie the short stick just because of Ryan (which it seems they are trying harder not to do? see: the Eddie insta post(s)), then they would’ve been better in the long run to just recast.
Now when it comes to 911 twitter anon, it really is a mess. Twitter as a whole is more cynical (and admittedly straight and political) than Tumblr is. They get so mad at poor Oliver over the littlest things (including character and publicity decisions that he has no control over), and where the Tumblr fandom groans and freaks out with a bit of hope, Twitter can be extremely harsh and brash sometimes. The fandom over there seems to be a lot more pessimistic about, well, pretty much everything, and while I do look sometimes (because I'm irl active on Twitter and can’t stay away) I can never stay for too long without getting a feeling of panic and dread over storylines. The fandom on Tumblr is definitely more peaceful and welcoming (and has a lot more buddie hope)! 
Thank you so much anon for letting me rant about this! If anyone else has anything like this my, well, everything is always open to chat!
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maliro-t · 1 year ago
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Adding to this in a post s3 world, mostly cause I just need to get the whole conversation out of my system.
My actual number one thought about this show is that people need to calm down and learn how to enjoy medium quality fantasy tv. Holy goddamn. I’ve been doing it for my whole life. I promise it is possible.
The conversation about this show (especially in a post-recast band-wagony outrage kind of way) has become so noisy and so condescending that as someone who loves the books and the game(s) and the show it is. very alienating
And just SO strange to me too. Again, I fully admit that the show is very medium. But. I don’t CARE!! Because I love the books so much that I’m just excited to see my guys! And I love watching actors act!! It’s fun! Yeah the writing isn’t as nuanced! It’s not as complex! It is fully not as smart! I don’t care! (also, as I mentioned before, if it were written for television in the same way it’s written in the novels it would be just fully unintelligible. unfortunately)
It is just especially jarring to me that THIS season, which was so much closer to the source material than the previous two, is the one where I really can’t escape outrage around the show’s betrayal of the books (which is especially ridiculous when people talk about episode 7 ‘sidelining’ Cavill. Girl, that literally happens in Time of Contempt. Ciri is the fucking protagonist. U are just obsessed with him. And ep7 was one of the best of the season imo).
I talked about this in my season masterpost or whatever, which is mostly an enthusiasm bucket that I made for myself, but I can’t see how anyone can watch episode 5 and conclude that this is an adaptation made with active spite towards the source material. They did not need to frame it with Geralt and Yen after the party that way. They did it BECAUSE the book did. They did it so that those brilliantly written tender scenes could be there at all, which they could have quite easily cut (I expected them to!).
Obviously, there’s a ton of bad faith and fully bigoted garbage mixed in too, which is part of what makes it hard to take any of it seriously-- half the time there are comments about ‘miscasts’, which is just barely concealed racism, or, as I mentioned before, misogynistic outrage at women having screentime despite being main characters. 
And I should be used to it lol I’ve been seeing men write dissertations about how Yennefer is cold hearted and irredeemably evil since 2016 and defending the paper white games with tired arguments about ‘historical accuracy’, but it still fucking sucks every time! Especially when people who should know better are taking those people’s side. Like they somehow don’t know THAT’S their actual argument.
Anyways. There are of course concessions I make, like, truly nothing has made me madder on this show than Rience getting decapitated. But that happened in the midst of a really enjoyable episode 🤷‍♂️. I really didn’t like almost anything about how the death witch plotline wrapped up in season two. But lots of stuff happened before and after that I really did 🤷‍♂️.
To use a popular talking point that I’ve seen as an example, I do want to talk about Cahir a bit more in depth, because of the way he’s been altered. And to be honest, it’s kind of strange to talk about changes made to him up to this point when in the books his actual appearances before Time of Contempt (or really, Baptism of Fire) are fairly limited, so, the ‘changes’ they’ve made have largely (though not all!) been invention and addition rather than pure deviation. But anyways, big changes include how high ranking he is in season two for example, or the fact that he’s imprisoned by Aretuza after Sodden rather than Emhyr himself after sacking Cintra-- though these are both tweaks that are essentially neutralized by his complete loss of status in Nilfgaard by season three. For a third (and most lamented) major change, he’s not as young in the show as he is in the books.
So, what is it that’s actually fundamental to Cahir’s arc in the books, and how does any of this effect it?
The thing I consider to be most central to Cahir is that both he and Ciri were traumatized by her capture.
I do think this is more visceral in its mundanity in the books, because their encounter isn’t infused with out-of-control power on Ciri’s part. Even without that, years later, he is so haunted by how afraid she was, how frantic, by cleaning the blood off of her, by trying and failing to calm her down. Because he’s just a person--a kid!--and in those moments, he couldn’t help but see her as one too. It’s so awful. That’s all it takes*. It is the soul shaking horror of seeing her react to his actions as a soldier. War is fucking horrific. Following orders can be fucking horrific. And he didn’t even fulfill his mission. After all that, he was punished for trying.
But the thing is, the show keeps that! We don’t see them fully dig their heels into it with him until this season, where we start seeing him dream of her (as he does in the books), letting that guilt slowly build up and eat away at him, but they really double down when Emhyr has him assassinate that Scoia’tel upstart (I forgot his name sgdfjshg I hated this guy). This, coupled with the dreams, is what really makes him start to feel the weight of his own actions in that same way, and it’s still something that manifests as a trauma. His extreme unease with what loyalty to Emhyr means but his continuous inability to ‘think for himself’, as Fringilla puts it (which is really a question of his safety above his beliefs, at a certain point) keeps him in the role of the Zealot even as he loses his faith in the cause. 
I do think this ties to his book arc well-- book Cahir doesn’t come out of imprisonment and go, ‘Well, that’s enough soldiering for me! I’m disillusioned now!’. It’s not until after Thanned that he deserts. It’s not until he’s seen Ciri again and failed to bring her to Emhyr AGAIN that he breaks away (of course, he knows he’s dead at that point, which rings true in the show too).
A Niflgaardian who doesn’t think he’s Nilfgaardian. A soldier who served a land that conquered his own, who followed a leader because it was what he was supposed to do, who blindly gave to a cause until it turned on him with a bounty and an executioner and a hefty dose of PTSD.
Now originally, part of the reason he ends up this way is because he’s so young- he has a certain amount of naiveté and impressionability, because yes, even by Thanned he’s, what, 24 max? A story about a reformed Zealot in his 30s rings different, yes, and is perhaps a less pointed commentary on how war preys on young people, but still a significant one on overall cultural brainwashing. He doesn’t need to be a kid for it to warp him, for it to start to eat him alive, OR for him to painstakingly crawl out bit by excruciating bit.**
And those first moments of lucidity and initiative we do see from him manifest in...basically suicidality! He’s begging Ciri to kill him, and he’s so guilty and wants it to be her so bad that he lets her escape and then vows that he’ll find her again-- not so he can capture her but so she can be the one to fucking execute him. Not Nilfgaard. If he’s to be punished, it must be at the hands of this person that he can’t forgive himself for hurting.
This version of the scene is unique to the show, but given Stygga, not out of line for the source. After Thanned in the book, he truly lives for her. Geralt initially thinks that he’s just out to save himself, but Cahir really just wants Ciri to be safe. To undo his own harm. To make something right (it’s honestly slightly ironic that Fringilla telling him to think for himself in the show is his epiphany because I don’t feel like in the book he ever manages to truly ACT for himself. but his path from then on is the manifestation of his own will, rather than the Empire’s or Emhyr’s which is still certainly significant).
Now, I do feel like Ciri was done a slight disservice in the show version of that scene only in that I do think it’s important that she runs from him and doesn't fight until cornered. Like, the degree to which she specifically fears him (even as she confidently faces other threats) and is traumatized by the image of him (or rather, the way her brain has dehumanized and reconstructed him as this faceless demonic phantom) is downplayed in the show I think, and I don’t feel like her confident challenge to him is warranted. Geralt’s role is minimized as well but I don’t mind that. It’s not about him. However, in service of meeting tv Cahir where he’s at in an effective way, this still gets the job done. I think there was definitely a way they could have done both, but it is what it is.
Anyways. The main thing the changes thus far prevent is Cahir’s romantic feelings towards Ciri (at least I fucking hope they'll prevent it 💀) and. personally. I find the way it’s written in the book very uncomfortable and his connection to her is significant enough without that being necessary. Certainly not that fiction has to be comfortable or sanitized, but I simply am glad to see that particular aspect of him unrepresented. 
All of this to say!! This was really a very long reiteration of what I originally wrote, which is that I firmly believe that you have to look at adaptation in terms of what it’s actually trying to do, not just with surface level accuracy. In my opinion anyways, with the Cahir example it really does stays true to the core of that character even with deviations! And regardless of that, it largely succeeds on its own! It is always more rewarding in my experience to look at what a story is doing rather than what it isn’t. And fucking honestly. Eamon Farren is so goddamn good in that role I don’t even care that much!! Which is fine too!!! 
OK that’s all folks, goodnight!!!!!!!!!!!!
*There is some implication that their ‘bond’ or w/e comes from his contact with her blood irrc, so in that sense there is still that magical connection, but the actual psychological effect on him can (and must, imo) be read just as strongly without that. I will never forget reading that part of the book, hearing him so vividly and horribly describe what that night with her was like.
**I'm adding this later but I do want to make a note of the story Cahir tells about Emhyr saving him from the usurper + Emhyr mentioning having 'known [him] since [his] voice cracked'; even aged up there that fundamental layer of child-soldier-turned-adult-soldier.
Happy Witcher eve! Since this is a blogging website, I’m gonna put up a long Blog Post™ I wrote a really long time ago about adaptation just to get my thoughts out there before new material comes out– book spoilers abound but I don’t actually explain them.
Keep reading
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gunsatthaphan · 4 years ago
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Imagine if the story is just Park going crazy
No mew actors >:(
Only Park >>:(((
the more I think about this the more I’m into it lmao 😂
~ 1moon: a villain origin story ~ 
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vanessakimballs · 4 years ago
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Honestly I 100% agree with your post abt the death battle. It just felt very off to me what with the unreal look and that they actually declared a winner. Idk i mean that kinda goes against one of the points of the original show lmao. And they recast caboose but didn’t bother to recast Tex or Sheila and just gave them the silent treatment?? Alright. Also yea the Simmons thing was incredibly disappointing to me bc he barely got to participate at all and just...wasn’t even in the main fight?? Like who thought that was a good decision lol. Also 100% agree with u calling bullshit on the blue win like not to be a sore loser but red team never lost a member and took down the fucking meta of all people?? But they didn’t think that mattered ig lmao. I mean I’m sure some people thought this was cool and that’s fine but if this was meant to be a send off to the og characters they failed imo it just felt like they could have put more into this :/
yeah, the whole point of the show was that these assholes were so incompetent that they COULDN’T kill each other. tex and sheila being mute makes me so mad XD. simmons should’ve been in the main fight, and the only reason he wasn’t was because they killed off sheila (blue team’s fifth member) and i guess couldn’t think of anything for him to do at that point? despite him being a cyborg AND knife-wielder? i mean i guess. and right! the meta was a red team victory. tucker helped, but it was grif and sarge who delivered the final blows.
if they wanted to do a sendoff to the original cast, they should’ve had an epilogue standalone canon 20+ min all halo machinima episode of them retired on chorus. then doc, carolina, wash, and sister could be there with them. but i guess since carolina and wash are in zero (for some reason), that can’t happen. why are they in zero again? ugh. the original characters deserve better than this.
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ceruleanwhore · 4 years ago
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I was bored (procrastinating like hell) so I decided to make some Winx Club character design/aesthetic boards like I did for Descendants
I felt like it was an appropriate way to waste my time since that live action series is coming out soon lol. Basically, I’m going for a more grown up, sometimes edgier, character design for a bunch of the characters that I think fits their character but translates into a young adult show while keeping the original aesthetics and some design elements. Anyway, let’s start with Bloom:
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So, here, the outfit is mostly the same as what she wears in the first season or two, plus nails and accessories. I decided that she is exactly the kind of person who would have her belly button pierced, so I gave her a bunny navel ring.
Next, we have Stella:
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I gave her a few different piercings: septum, navel, and lower back dermals. I felt that all of these fit really well with her aesthetic and energy, same with the rhinestone in the eye makeup. 
Then, there’s Flora:
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I don’t think she would have anything other than her lobes pierced, so the star lily earrings are it in terms of piercings for her. However, the one design element I added that I think is important is the flowers in her hair. I strongly feel like she would and should always be wearing some sort of vegetation in her hair.
Next up is Tecna:
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So, in case you can’t see with the size of the image, I gave her motherboard nails, battery earrings, and a mini level necklace. For piercings, I gave her one centered collar bone dermal and three on her forearm.
Then there’s Musa:
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I honestly think this one is my favorite. I gave her record earrings, sheet music nails, butterfly kisses, two lip rings, and wrist dermals that can be tied with a ribbon, like in the picture. Also, I think the twin buns make more sense and look better than the really short pigtails she had in the beginning.
Now we have Layla:
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Not much going on that needs to be addressed but I do love the through-the-ear tentacle earring/ear cuff. Oh, and the girl in the picture isn’t a fancast or a faceclaim, I just couldn’t find a picture of the right hair that wasn’t taken with the person facing the camera.
Okay, so, lastly, we have Daphne:
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I didn’t want to include an actual mask in this because that’s not something she wears normally, at least once she’s returned to her body, but I did find a masquerade mask ring that I think is rather perfect and the bracelet and necklace are orange to kind of tie in the ‘nymph of Domino’ aesthetic.
So, anyway, that’s everything for now. I also did the trix. Let me know if any of you would want me to do any more with this, like another one of these but with the fairy forms or a set with the guys or some face claims or whatever. Also, I’ve been thinking of making a petition for the people in charge to rewrite the script for F:tWS to include all the original character and then also recast for accuracy, mainly in terms of race, so also let me know if you would be interested in that.
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jawritter · 4 years ago
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You and Me...
Chapter 15
***SERIES WARNINGS**** Rape, non-con, male!rape, injury, violence, description of injury caused by rape, nightmares, self-harm, panic attacks, implied female non-con, language, ass hole Jensen, hurt!Jensen, dark fic, smut. If there is anything else I will add it as I go.
***Chapter Warnings*** Language probably somewhere in there, because it’s me y’all. Hints of anxiety, brief mentions of nightmares, and panic attacks. Like very brief, self-confidence issues. (If that’s a proper way to describe it...) Slight angst, a very little fluff, I think that’s about it. 
Pairing: Jensen Ackles x Reader
Word Count: 3278
A/N: This chapter is a combo of the original chapters 15 & 16, It might look at first glance like a filler chapter, but pay close attention to details in behaviors. **SPOILER** If you do it will save you some shock in upcoming chapters lol. As always all mistakes are mine! Please do not copy my work!! Feedback is gold! I hope you enjoy this one!
Summary: It’s funny how one choice you made can change your whole life. One mistake can alter your course, and set you on a path that forever will haunt you. Two people find themselves getting through one of the hardest trials of Jensen’s life, on just one small promise. You and Me. We’ll get through it together…
Want more? Check out my masterlist!!
***MASTERLIST***
***YOU AND ME MASTERLIST***
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The sun broke pink just over the horizon of Jensen's property. You found yourself sitting on the back porch with a cup of coffee in your hands, listening to the early morning sounds of birds overhead.
Even though it was fall, it was still slightly warm from the rain that had passed yesterday. Jensen and yourself had fallen asleep on the floor pallet that he'd made somewhere in the middle of the first season of Game of Thrones. You both would have stayed there too, that is if the nightmares hadn’t started.
You moved the both of you to the bedroom, but you never really went sound to sleep after that. Jensen seemed to fall asleep again pretty soundly thankfully, and when you made your way out here he was still sleeping soundly.
You'd already been up, showered, picked up all the pillows and blankets, and gotten yourself ready for the day. You were planning on finishing your cup of coffee and waking up Jensen if he'd not woken up by then, and get started on breakfast.
It had rained so much yesterday that the roads headed into the studio were flooded. That being said, it looked like the two of you got another day off.
Standing and stretching, you see Jensen sitting at the bar on the phone. A cup of coffee in hand, and his hair a mess. He looked so cute when he was still sleepy in the morning, and you couldn’t help the content smile that spread over your face at the almost normal scene playing out before you, it was nice after everything that had happened to feel somewhat normal.
Opening the door you were starting to hear bits and pieces of the conversation he was having over whoever he was on the phone with.
"Yes Danneel I'm aware of that, but if I want to see someone I'm entitled to do so... No... No... I don't know if that's a good idea... Well, I'm still... Yes, I'm aware of that... But I...WOULD YOU SHUT UP AND LET ME TALK PLEASE!... I'm still having some problems. I don't know if that's a smart thing to do right now... I do want to help... Okay fine...FINE!... I'll be there to get her in a few hours... If you just have to have her picked up now I can call Jared... Because I just got out of bed that's why... Whatever damn, you're being a bitch this morning... Yes, I did call you a bitch. Keep it up and your descriptions are going to get more colorful than that... Fuck you... I'll call Jared and have him pick her up. I'm not in the mood to see you right now." 
With that, he hung up the phone and rubbed his face with his hands, not even noticing you were standing there.
You walk up behind him and start rubbing his shoulders, not exactly sure what to do here, not wanting to overstep your place. His head rolled against you, and let out a deep sigh as you worked the knots out of his tense body.
"Everything okay?" you finally got up the nerve to ask. You normally tried to stay out of his business when it came to Danneel. You didn’t want him to feel like you were trying to step yourself in where you had no business being, and this was the first time you had ever blatantly asked about something that was going on between them.
"Yeah, it's fine. One of the twins has the stomach flu. Danneel doesn't want JJ to catch it so that she doesn't miss school. So she called and asked if she could spend the week with me. Which is fine, but she wants me to go get her from her house right now," he shrugged and turned around to wrap his arms around your middle, pulling you closer to him.
“She also has somehow found out about us, and she wasn’t exactly happy about it, even though it’s none of her damn business.” 
You kept your mouth shut because you understood a little bit of Danneel’s side there. Her children still had to see their dad, and that might mean you’re around them too… You would probably have had a similar response.
"I hope she doesn't see me having some of the problems that I'm having right now. It's not that I don't want to see her, I just don't want her to see me this fucked up," he said, his voice muffled because of his head pressed against your chest.
"It will be fine. She's not gonna notice. She's just gonna be happy to see her daddy," you tell him, running your fingers through his tousled morning hair. Honestly, it was becoming your favorite thing to do.
Just as you were about to pull away from him and fix breakfast so that he could get ready to have Jared pick up his daughter. The phone rang again.
"What Danneel?... Damn... Well, she was already exposed... Okay... No, it's fine... Tell her when she gets better I'll come pick her up, and we'll go to the zoo again and get Ice cream or something... No, I know... I'm sorry too, I'm just not myself still... Tell the kids I love them... Okay... Fine... Okay... Bye." 
He let out a deep breath and dropped his head down on the bar.
"What's up?" you asked, feeling like you were seriously intruding, but you were concerned about any sort of stress being on him right now.
"Looks like she's already caught it. She started getting sick when Danneel got off the phone with me a while ago. So she's just gonna keep her there." Jensen said, being torn between his family, and where he was now was still something he was learning how to do; on top of the stress that his attack had put on him. What made it worse was that you didn’t know how to help him through this part.
The physical you could handle, the nightmares, the panic attacks, you could handle, but when it came to his kids, that’s a whole different ball game.
"I'm gonna go grab a shower," he says, standing from the stool and placing a kiss on your forehead before making his way to the bathroom. You wished there was something to make him feel better. You didn't know what you could do though. Deciding to give him his space would probably be the best idea you turn and start on breakfast.
A few hours later Jensen was sitting with a guitar strung over his lap in the chair next to the window, and you were sitting with the laptop in yours, working through some transcripts that the publishing company had sent you. For the first time in a long time, everything felt... Well... Normal... It was easy... There was a comfortable silence that had fallen between the two of you. Only the sound of Jensen's guitar and your fingers sliding across the keys of your computer filled the room.
Out of nowhere a loud knocking at the front door made the both of you jump, pulling you both out of your comfortable state.
"I got it," Jensen said, sitting his guitar on the stand, and standing to his feet. You were halfway wondering if it was Danneel So you closed your computer and looked toward the front door, listening to try and see who it was.
You weren't left in the dark long though. Jared's voice came booming through the house. You rolled your eyes and picked your computer back up. 'Jensen must have called him over,' you think to yourself, not paying much attention as the two men walked into the room and sat down.
"Okay guys, listen, I got some really big news just now," Jared said excitedly, almost jumping up and down in his seat like a kid on Christmas morning.
You look across the room at him and see a dark-haired woman you knew as Jared's wife sitting next to him. She smiles and nods in your direction and you do the same. You hadn’t even heard her come in with Jared.  
"Okay,” Jensen said, almost a little afraid judging by his tone of voice. "Spill."
"Well, I got a phone call early this morning from Robert and Andrew. There is a network that has been running our reruns on cable TV for years, they’re not happy that the show is over. Apparently, the president of TNT Kevin Reilly is a fan, and wants to pick up Supernatural on their network for season 16!" Jared was practically floating above his seat he was so happy. Gen looked over at her husband and laughed at him a little nervously, but you could see she was just as excited as he was, obviously feeding off her husband's good mood.
You looked at Jensen, he didn’t look as excited. His brow was furrowed, and he was biting his bottom lip. Looking down at his hands in this lap, he was obviously thinking hard about what Jared just said.
"Come on Jay," Jared said, picking up on his best friend's mood. "I've already talked to Misha. He's onboard. Let's give the Winchester another run." Jared said, sitting on the edge of his seat. He knew this could never fly if Jensen refused to participate, there was no acceptable recast, and there was no way the fandom would watch if Dean wasn’t a part.
"You know I want to," Jensen said in a rushed breath. "I'm just worried that I can't do some of the things now that they may want me to do," Jensen said, shifting uncomfortably in his seat, still not looking at anyone in the room.
"Robert and I already thought about that. If this goes through we will work around any handicap, setbacks, or problem you may have that comes up. It won't be an issue," Jared assured him, giving his best Sam Winchester puppy dog eyes.
Jensen licked his lips and nodded his head. "Okay, let's try. What do we need to do?" he asked, looking up at Jared finally. Just a little hint of excitement in his own eyes you hadn't seen in a long time.
Maybe he needed this more than he knew he did...
"Well, we fly to Georgia to meet Robert, Andrew, Misha, and Kevin in the morning if we decide to do this. I know it's short notice man, but this may be our only opportunity to bring our show back.” 
Jensen chewed a little more on his lips, thinking hard.
"Okay, but Y/N comes with me," he said, reaching over and taking your hand in his.
"That's cool. Gen's coming with me. We'll rent a ridiculously expensive hotel with a spa in the bottom of it or some shit and the girls can hang out there while we're in the meeting," Jared said, looking between you and Gen. “Y/N will only be a phone call away if you need her.”
"Sounds great to me," Gen said.
"Yeah, I think that I can do that," you tell Jared, giving Jensen's hand a squeeze, letting him know you were okay with his decision, and that you were there.
"If this goes as planned, if we get the contract for a 16th season. Our lives are gonna change again dramatically." Jared said, looking at everyone in the room.
"Tell me when they where ever settled?" Jensen said, you could see his mood starting to lighten at the prospect of getting back to work.
Getting up you retrieve a beer for everyone in the room. You were a little scared, and a lot nervous, but the look on Jensen's face as he talked about getting back to work again made it all worth it. Whatever sacrifices were in the future, if you were with him, that's all that mattered.
The smile on his face right now as he talked to Jared about getting everyone back together again was worth everything that could possibly come again.
-------------------------------------
Jensen's POV:
"Yes sir. Mr. Reilly, we are more than excited to work with you all as well," Jensen said, standing and shaking hands with the man sitting across a conference table form Jared, Misha, Robert, Andrew, and Himself.  
The meeting had been a success, everyone agreed to everyone’s terms and needs, they were going to go for the 16th season of supernatural.
Honestly, it was something Jensen thought he had buried, he’d grieved it even, thinking he’d left Dean behind forever, but like he had told the fans of the show when does anything in supernatural ever stay dead?
Jared was convinced that they could easily knock out two more seasons, but Jensen was worried like he was when they had decided it was time to end supernatural in its 15th season. He wanted SPN to end on a high note, and it had in season 15, not though he was worried it wouldn’t be accepted as well as it went out, or when the hype faded it would fade before they could bring it to as close again.
Either way here they were, paperwork signed, plans with agencies, and crews were already in place, writers were being hired.
It was going to happen.
They will start filming next summer, Jensen's idea. Give everyone time to readjust their lives back into Vancouver. Also, it gave the writers a little more time to get their storyline together. It wasn't going to be easy to bring the brothers back. To be honest they were probably going to spend close to a year in Vancouver just preparing to kick off filming and getting the storyline straight.
As they exited the building Jared and Misha were arm and arm, skipping like a bunch of idiots. Robert and Andrew were walking ahead of him, talking excitedly on their phones. Every person that was involved in this show’s lives just changed dramatically.
They seemed excited about it. In a way, so was Jensen, but still, there was that uncertainty...
Supernatural was their life for years, over a decade and a half.
What if this didn't go well?
What if season 16 was a flop?
What if he couldn't do what they asked him to do?
What if he couldn't perform like he used to?
All these uncertainties rolled around in his head as his friends celebrated the whole way back to the hotel, but honestly, Jensen just felt tired.
"Jensen, you and Y/N gonna come to help us celebrate tonight?" Misha asked him. Jensen just rubbed his face tiredly.
"Actually guys, I think I'm gonna sit this one out. I'm pretty tired today," he said, Jared looked at him concerned from the front seat. Everyone else just gave him a look of pity. Man he hated when people looked at him that way now.
"Jay, are you sure you're okay, man?" he asked, trying to read his almost unreadable best friend.
"Oh yeah, I'm fine, just a little tired. I'll be fine once I get some sleep. Y/N and I are probably gonna fly home first thing tomorrow morning," he said, trying to change the subject to anything but where his head was right now.
"Yeah, Gen and I will too. Got a lot to prepare for!" Jared said, turning back around, giving up on trying to figure out what was wrong with Jensen and thinking to himself that he would just ask Y/N later how Jensen was really doing. He usually lets more show around her than he did anyone else and Jared knew that. If something was wrong Y/N hopefully would be able to get it out of him.
Jensen was tired, he wasn't lying, but more than anything he wanted to get back to the hotel room with Y/N. He wanted to get wrapped up with her again, and go into a stress induced coma for the next foreseeable future. The rest he could work out once he made it back home.
One step at a time.
That's just how he had to live his life right now.
Your POV:
Yourself and Gen had spent the day together while the boys were meeting with the network. You had let her talk you into going with her to get your nails done, and now the two of you were sitting in the small coffee shop across from the hotel when your phone rang, and Jensen told you both the good news.
Once you ended the call with Jensen you hurried to get back to the hotel room, waiting on Jensen to get back too.
He didn't seem himself on the phone.
He seemed distant, his voice seemed strained and tired.
Today was just not a good day for him mentally, and you knew it from the moment you both woke up this morning.
He needed to rest.
Even though his physical injuries had basically healed a while ago, his metal wounds hadn't even started to scab over yet. They were still sore and fresh. Too much in one day could cause another episode of panic attacks. He'd been making good progress, and you didn't want him to start to slip.
When Jensen came through the door he gave you a half-hearted smile, slipping his blazer off and throwing it in the chair next to you before kicking his shoes off, and flopping down on the bed next to you. You lay down next to him, start tracing little circles on his back. "You okay handsome?" you ask, he looked at you with a tired expression.
"Yeah, guess I'm not as mentally well as I thought I was. I'm exhausted for some reason," he tells you, scooting over closer to you, wrapping his arms around your waist.
"Stress babe. You can't let it get to you. You know that," you tell him, playing with the buttons on his shirt. He laughs a little at that.
"I'll be fine once we get started. It’s just… I worked so hard on this, gave up a good bit of my life into this show, I'm afraid it won't go very well. If it’s brought back."
You nuzzle your way up to him, giving him as much warmth as you could.
"I know, but don't worry about it. It will all pan out, just enjoy the fact that you guys get to bring it back. Don't worry about things you can't control." A comfortable silence fell between the two of you again. You thought for a moment that he'd fallen asleep until he spoke.
"They're all going to one of the local bars to celebrate, but I didn't really want to go," he says, shifting his weight a little.
"Well, then we don't have to go. There will be plenty of other celebrations and parties I'm sure as you guys start the season's filming."
Secretly you thought he should have gone out with his friends, but you didn’t say anything, you didn’t want to push him.
More silence fell over the room , and Jensen got up off the bed. "Come on, I can't keep doing this. I can't keep hiding where I think I'm safe. The only way I'm going to get past this feeling is to just break off and do it right? Well let's go grab a bite to eat, just you and me, then we'll go down to the bar with everyone else," he says, pulling you into a sitting position.
"You sure that's what you wanna do?" you asked him, eyeing him closely.
He'd never brought you to a restaurant before. You figured because he just didn't want to talk to anyone else right now, but now you could see it.
Anxiety.
He was afraid to be out in public. He was scared.
You didn't even recognize it until right now, and you were already kicking yourself for being so damn blind to it.
"Yeah, I'm sure," he says, pulling you to him, kissing you softly.
You made a mental note to start paying more attention to the little things, and stop passing it off as just Jensen being Jensen, because you were starting to worry just how bad his anxiety was, and if he was trying to cover it up and keep it from you.
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