#anthony youre a genius and i hate you

[citruscore]

when terry met terry

[steddieas-shegoes]

pop goes metal

for @corrodedcoffinfest prompt 'alternate universe'

rated t | 964 words | cw: language | tags: famous corroded coffin, pop star steve harrington, flirting, getting together

🎤🎤🎤🎤🎤🎤🎤🎤🎤🎤🎤🎤🎤🎤

"No fuckin' way are we working with him," Eddie argues with their manager. "You're always so worried about our image and then you go and have us doing a song with a fuckin' pop artist?"

The manager, Anthony, rolls his eyes. "It'll broaden your fanbase. You know who spends money on shit? Women. You know who likes Steve Harrington? Women."

"Does he even write his own shit?" Gareth asks.

"Does it matter?" Eddie turned to him with a glare. "Even if he writes it, it's not our style."

"Maybe we could at least hear what he's trying to work with us on?" Jeff, always the calming presence, asked towards Anthony.

"He sent over a sample before we sign any agreements."

Eddie sat down in the chair furthest from everyone else, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Now, this isn't an official recording. Just what he did on his phone on his tour bus with his acoustic guitar. He arranged the bass already for Frankie, too, but said he's open to whatever Gareth feels is right for the drums." Anthony pressed play on his phone and the room was filled with strumming and a surprisingly raspy voice singing what was clearly a chorus.

Eddie could pretend he hated it, and maybe the guys would agree with him and they'd never have to speak of this again.

He couldn't hide his reaction fast enough, though.

His jaw dropped as he listened to the lyrics, surprised to find that they weren't just about going to a club and dancing or being in love.

Steve's voice broke at the end before there was shuffling and the recording stopped.

Eddie felt everyone's eyes on him. He closed his mouth and looked down at the floor, tapping his fingers against his arm.

"It's not bad," he finally said. "Not sure why he needs us, though."

"Apparently, his brother is a huge fan of you and suggested he try to work with you."

"I think we should do it." Jeff said, a note of finality in his tone that Eddie knew he wouldn't try arguing with.

"Yeah, can't hurt." Frankie shrugged.

"If he's giving me creative freedom on the drums, how can I say no?" Gareth smirked.

"Guess we're working with the pop diva, then."

****

Steve Harrington was nothing like what they expected.

He showed up to their studio in sweats and glasses, holding a tablet and a bottle of Tylenol. They started to introduce themselves as he found a spot on the couch.

"I'm really glad you guys were willing to work with me," he said after he shook everyone's hand.

Eddie stared.

"My uh, my brother, Dustin, he's kinda why I wrote this song and I know it means a lot that you agreed to be on it," Steve continued. "So, thanks. Hopefully it doesn't ruin your vibes or anything."

Eddie felt every wall he built crumbling with every word Steve spoke. God dammit, this man just had to be sincere and hot and talented, didn't he?

"Nah, we're gonna sound great together." Eddie smiled at Steve's wide-eyed look. "You wanna show us the whole song?"

Steve nodded, pulling something up on his phone. Another recording, this one more professional and included an electric guitar.

"Robin was the stand in for the electric while I did bass."

"So you can play bass?" Frankie asked, leaning in.

"Yeah, but my preferred instrument is piano. I just don't do a lot of slow songs. Guitar is what gets the women interested, or so they tell me," Steve smiled awkwardly. "But feel free to change some things up. I'm totally open to suggestions."

But really, it was damn near perfect as it was. Frankie made one tweak during the bridge, but Steve ended up loving it more than the original and told him so with a grin.

"You're a fuckin' genius!" He exclaimed.

Gareth started messing around on the drums while Steve and Eddie worked on the first couple of lines.

"Something still doesn't feel right," Steve mentioned.

"Maybe we change the rhyming pattern?" Eddie suggested. "You've got ABAB. Might work better to do AABB. Some of these words can be moved around to make that work."

Steve stared at the notes app for a moment, then looked back up at Eddie, beaming smile making his eyes squint.

"I could kiss you!" He shouted. As soon as he realized what he said, he blushed, looking back down at the phone. "I mean, thanks. That's a great suggestion."

Eddie searched Steve's face, coming to the conclusion that there was probably a good reason why Steve didn't care about what women liked when it came to his music.

"I have a pretty strict rule about kissing people I work with," Eddie said slowly, quietly so they wouldn't be overheard.

"Yeah, no, that makes sense. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable or-"

"But we won't be working with each other for long, right?" Eddie continued, letting his hand rest on Steve's thigh. God, he was muscular.

"Um. No I guess not."

"Rain check, then. Until we've finished our professional relationship." Eddie couldn't believe he was suggesting this. Showing interest in a pop star. What's next? Dating one? Marrying one?

"Are you saying you wanna kiss me, Munson?" Steve suddenly sounded more confident.

"I'm saying we've got work to do before I can get my hands on you." Eddie tapped his thigh before pulling away. "So let's get to it."

"Dude! I got it!" Gareth yelled, interrupting their moment.

"Be right there!" Steve yelled back, not looking away from Eddie. "Might break a record for fastest recording time ever just so I can kiss you," Steve added quietly to Eddie before standing and walking over to Gareth.

"Well, fuck." Eddie sighed, smiling to himself.

[hayleythesugarbowl]

could I request an Ian hecox x reader where it’s an established relationship and reader also works at smosh!? Ty + I love your writing so much!!! Please take care and take your time :)

Fishy || Ian Hecox x reader

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ masterlist • smosh masterlist  ⋆˚｡⋆୨୧⋆

summary: you and ian have been dating for some time now, sneaking around so no one in the office knows you’re seeing each other. but when you find yourself in an uncomfortable situation, you’re forced to reveal your relationship to your coworkers

word count: 1.8k

warnings: none

a/n: hello love!! i hope you enjoy this + the way i went with it. it’s a little short but it gets the job done i think. i love ian sm 🤭

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     “Hey you.”

     You spun around to find Ian, your boyfriend, standing behind you.

      He wrapped his arms around you, pulling you in for a kiss.

     “Ian,” you whispered. “Not here.”

     You were in the middle of the Smosh studio. Well, not exactly in the middle. More like a secluded corner. But still, anyone could walk in.

      “Man, you eat a few garlic fries and suddenly it’s—”

     You laughed, interrupting him. “You know it’s not that.”

     It wasn’t that you didn’t want anyone to know that you were dating Ian. In fact, if any of your coworkers were perceptive at all they would’ve noticed by now. You’d come to work wearing something of Ian’s too many times to count.

     But nobody had noticed yet and you just weren’t exactly eager to tell them. That way you were spared all the dating your boss jokes. 

     “I could send everyone home,” Ian shrugged. 

     “You’re impossible,” you smiled, rolling your eyes at him. 

     “Or a genius,” he countered, tucking your hair behind your ear.

     You leaned into his touch, wishing this could last forever.

     Suddenly, you heard the sounds of voices coming towards you. Your friends must have just gotten done with a shoot.

     You quickly stepped away from Ian, leaving a safe distance between you. 

     You felt Ian flinch. You hated it too, but it was better this way. Or, that’s what you told yourself.

     Courtney was the first one to round the corner, smiling when she saw the two of you. “Hey, my guys! You ready?”

     You’d almost forgotten. Some of you had planned on going to lunch after filming was over that day. You couldn’t believe it was already that time—the day had flown by.

     “Definitely,” you shot Courtney a thumbs up. 

     “I’m starving,” Shayne came up behind his wife, throwing his arm around her shoulder. “All I’ve eaten today is Garret’s weird peanut butter pasta.”

     “I didn’t think it was that bad,” Anthony admitted, standing beside them. “It was flavorful, at least.”

     “And oddly fishy,” Angela added, making a face as she followed.

     “Oh that was the Anchovy paste,” Chanse said. “And I liked it, Garret let me keep the jar.”

     “This coming from Mr. Lube,” Ian mock- whispered and everybody laughed.

     “Laugh all you want, but it came in handy last weekend,” Chanse crossed his arms.

     “Which reminds me,” Courtney turned to you, “Jonah’s coming with us to lunch with us!”

     You felt your face pale. “What?”

     “What does that have to do with lube?” You heard Angela mutter to Chanse.

     “You remember, the guy I was talking about that would be perfect for you? I invited him so you two can officially meet,” she beamed.

     You saw a muscle in Ian’s jaw tick as you tried to fake a smile. 

     You had forgotten about that too. A couple weeks ago, Courtney had mentioned one of her friends who had just moved to the area. She kept going on about how he was kind and funny and something about your signs being compatible. 

     You knew Courtney had no idea that you and Ian were in relationship, otherwise she definitely wouldn’t be trying to set you up with another guy.

     You had panicked in trying to cover up your’s and Ian’s relationship and told her that you’d love to go out with him sometime.   You kinda hadn’t thought anything would actually come of it. 

    “Court, I don’t know,” You started. “Maybe some other time or—”

     “It’s already done,” she said, “Trust me, I wouldn’t set you up with anyone I didn’t think you would hit it off with immediately.”

     There was nothing you could do but smile and say, “Alright.”

     You couldn’t tell her why you suddenly had changed your mind about wanting to go out with her friend. Not without revealing your secret relationship. And you couldn’t not go to the lunch, not without raising everyone’s suspicions. 

     You looked at Ian and he shrugged. Anthony caught your eye and he gave you a reassuring smile.

     He was the only one at Smosh that knew about you and Ian. Being Ian’s best friend he said he just knew these things.

     That, and he’d caught you one time in the break room. 

     “Well, yay!” Courtney exclaimed. “Let’s go then.”

     All of you began walking towards the door. You hung back so you could talk to Ian without anyone hearing your conversation. 

     “I’m sorry,” you whispered.

     “Hey, it’s not your fault,” he said, letting his fingers brush yours as you walked. “Just, you know, be really repulsive so he doesn’t want to go out with you.”

     You chuckled, “I’ll try my best. Where are some of those garlic fries when you need them?”

     You grabbed Ian’s hand, linking your fingers together, safe behind everyone else.    

     Anthony turned around, smiling at the two of you. 

     You took a deep breath, looking at Ian, and praying you could get through this lunch unscathed. 

₊˚ ✧ ‿︵‿୨୧‿︵‿ ✧ ₊˚

      “Ok, is it just me, or does everything taste like fish?” Angela asked, dipping a fry in ketchup and holding it out in front of her.

     “It’s just you,” You took the fry out of her hand, popping it into your mouth.

      You sat at a table, an array of food and drinks atop it, Ian on one side of you and Jonah on the other.

      Of course it had worked out that way. 

      Jonah had tried to talk to you throughout the whole lunch—why wouldn’t he? as far as he knew this was supposed to be a date?—and you had tried to act as politely disinterested as possible.

     Now, he turned to you, asking, “So, are you more of a ketchup or a mustard  person?”

     “Um, I like both,” you answered. “Depends on what I’m eating.”

     “Me, I can’t stand mustard,” the man said, “Not since the shark incident of 4th grade.”

     He began telling you the story and you promptly spaced out. You looked across the table. Shayne and Courtney were deep in a conversation and Angela was putting fries in her mouth and imitating a walrus to an annoyed Chanse. 

     Next to you, Ian was talking to Anthony in a low voice. 

     “And so anyways, needless to say I don’t where orange pants on Tuesday’s anymore,” Jonah was saying. 

     You nodded, realizing you’d missed most of whatever he was saying. 

     You turned to Ian. He smiled at you and grabbed your hand under the table. You looked round to make sure no one had seen the exchange.

     But everyone was fully engrossed in their conversations. Except for the man next to you.

     “So,” he started, and you gave him credit for trying to make conversation, even as you were practically ignoring him, so as not to give him the wrong idea. “Do you come to this place often?”

     “First time I’ve been,” you said. “But the fries are killer, I may have to come back.”

     “Maybe we could come back together,” he answered. 

     You felt Ian grip your hand tighter under the table.

     “Oh,” you fumbled for words. “Maybe. But I’m going to be pretty busy with work for a while. You might want to go with someone else, no use waiting on me.”

     “And if I want to wait on you?” He almost whispered. 

     “I’m flattered,” you managed. “But I’m just not really looking to date right—”

     “Courtney told me you were looking for a serious relationship,” Jonah accused.

     Of course she had. You had basically told her as much.

     “Courtney may have gotten the wrong idea,” you said, “I’m not really interested in a relationship, of any kind, at the moment.”

     “What?” Courtney asked. She must have heard her name and now was waiting for a response. The whole table was, it looked like.

     “I lied,” you said. “I’m not looking to date—I can’t date.”

     “Why not?” 

     You took a deep breath. “Jonah, you seem like a great—”

     If not a little pushy

     “—person, but I can’t go out with you. With anyone. Because…”

     You looked to Ian for help, nodding ever- so-slightly. He smiled back at you, as if to say go for it. You watched as everyone’s eyes were on you. Now was a good a time as any.

     “Because I’m already seeing someone,”you blurted out.

     “Oh!” Courtney exclaimed. “Well, that’s great! Can I ask who?”

     “He lives kinda far away,” Anthony interrupted quickly, looking at you. “Right, (Y/n)? You probably wouldn’t—”

     You shook your head, silently thanking him for being willing to help, but knowing you might as well spill the beans now.

     “I’m—” You stared, but Ian beat you to it.

     “It’s me,” Ian said. “(Y/n) is dating me.”

     Everyone’s shocked expressions moved back and forth between you and Ian.

     He lifted your linked hands from under the table, as if it was some kind of proof. You supposed it was.

     “That’s right,” Ian said, pointing at you and looking around at all of your friends. “I’m the lucky guy who gets to get with this.”

     “We were waiting for a good time to tell you guys,” you said, rolling your eyes at Ian. “And, surprise!”

     “You’re dating?” Anthony over-dramatized. “This is news to me!”

     “Anthony, shut up, you knew the whole time,” Ian waved him off.

     “Wow,” Shayne ran a hand through his hair. “Congratulations you guys. I have like four—no, five!—jokes I could—”

     You raised an eyebrow at him.

     “Later,” he corrected, leaning back in his chair as Courtney patted his arm. “It can wait till later.”

     “I had no idea,” Courtney turned to you. “I totally didn’t mean to encourage you to cheat.”

     “I know,” you assured her.

     “Yeah, well, I’m going to take off,” Jonah said, standing up. “Later Courtney. Nice meeting you (Y/n).”

     “You know, I’m not sure I liked him,” Chanse crossed his arms. 

     He left the table and Courtney leaned in. “You know, the more I think about it, the more I’m starting to feel like you’re not perfect for each other.”

     Your whole table burst into laughter, before quieting down again.

     You turned to face Ian. You felt lighter than you had in a while. As fun as it was sneaking around, it would be a lot more fun not having to hide your relationship from your friends. 

     “So,” you started.

     “So,” Ian agreed.

     “I think there’s only one thing left to do,” you told him. 

     “Eat Jonah’s food?” Ian joked.

     But you just shook your head, leaning in and kissing him on the lips.

     Your friends whooped and hollered, enjoying the moment with you. 

     You pulled away from Ian gently, his arm still around your shoulder. 

     You loved Ian so much. 

     And you thought your coworkers reaction was something? Wait until the fans found out. 

     Because you would tell them—in due time. In fact, you had all the time in the world. Right now, you just let yourself enjoy this moment, surrounded by people you love.

     “Okay, taste this celery,” Angela said, as she held out the stalk. You’d almost forgotten she was there—she had been uncharacteristically quiet this whole time.

     “You can’t tell me it doesn’t taste fishy!”

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ˋ°•*⁀➷ ahh hope you enjoyed my babes 💋 stay tuned for another ian fic coming soon!!

[dhaaruni]

If you liked Bridgerton, here are other historical romances with the same tropes:

Virgin-Meets-Rake (Season 1, Simon and Daphne):

When the Duke was Wicked by Lorraine Heath: She's a witty debutante who's the jewel of the season, he's a seasoned rake mourning the death of his wife and child with excessive hedonism, and she recruits him to teach her how to attract a husband

The Lady Gets Lucky by Joanna Shupe: She's a shy heiress and master chef who struggles to talk to men, he's an irreverent scoundrel and would-be restaurant owner she recruits to teach her lessons to catch a husband

Devil in Winter by Lisa Kleypas: The villain in It Happened One Autumn enters a marriage-of-convenience with an heiress with a stutter (whose best friend he kidnapped, whoops) and at one point he goes, "I’m Sebastian, Lord St. Vincent. I can’t be celibate. Everyone knows that," and isn't being ironic.

Nine Rules to Break when Romancing a Rake by Sarah MacLean: She's on-the-shelf and deeply bored, he's a rake who's suddenly been given custody of his irreverent and wild teenage half-sister, she recruits him to help her be rebellious

Bound by Your Touch by Meredith Duran: He's a (seemingly) silly dandy, she's impossible to charm, and he shatters her facade

Enemies-To-Lovers** (Season 2, Anthony and Kate):

Eleven Scandals to Start to Win a Duke's Heart by Sarah MacLean: She loves causing trouble, he totally hates getting her out of it, she's wild, he's starchy, and they fall madly in love

The Notorious Lord Knightly by Lorraine Heath: She's the viperous writer who's publishing explosive smut starring him, her former fiancé that jilted her at the alter, and they find each other again

The Duke Gets Even by Joanna Shupe: She's a free-spirited heiress whose reputation was ruined ages ago, he's a broke Duke looking for a wife to fill his coffers and fix his estate, they see each other for who they truly are

It Happened One Autumn (and its precursor Then Came You) by Lisa Kleypas: two iterations of the classic, "free spirited woman meets buttoned-up man who loathes her and is kind of a freak in the sheets" trope in the best way possible. Also, Alex buys Lily a bear in Then Came You, which obviously made me cry

All the Ways to Ruin a Rogue by Sophie Jordan: His best friend is her brother, and they really want to fuck but hate it

Notorious Pleasures by Elizabeth Hoyt: She's engaged to his brother, they meet when she walks in on him fucking another woman, HATES her for being perfect, she hates him for being a degenerate loser, and infidelity ensues.

** These are true enemies-to-lovers books, not that hella lame rivals-to-lovers shit that's all over contemporary romances of late

Friends-To-Lovers (Season 3, Colin and Penelope):

The Lady Hellion by Joanna Shupe: Sophia is trying to solve a mystery (and dresses up as a man in the process), and recruits her friend (and one-time kissing buddy) Lord Quint to teach her how to shoot. She's exasperating, he's charmed and there's a puppy involved.

The Countess Conspiracy by Courtney Milan: She's a genius botanist but can't share her research since she's a woman, and he's her public face but refuses to continue anymore. He's always been in love with her, she's as oblivious as they come.

My Fake Rake by Eva Leigh: She's a scientist, he's an anthropologist, they're longtime friends and she recruits him to help her make a visiting naturalist jealous but ends up falling for him herself

Ravishing the Heiress by Sherry Thomas: They're in a marriage of convenience, but end up becoming real friends in the process before they realize they're in love

The Duchess Hunt by Lorraine Heath: He's a Duke looking to get married, she's his secretary and most trusted friend, he recruits her to find him a wife and they fall madly in love in the process

Forever Your Rogue by Erin Langston: He's her brother's friend who is recruited to help her manage her estate when her husband dies. She flits around constantly in anxiety and never sits still, and he likes it.

This should get you started!

[g1rld1ary]

masterlist 🦢🎀 𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒ 🎀🦢

anthony lockwood ✩

➻ sharing's caring

you meet lockwood at arif's and bond over your love of scones

➻ come home with me

your bus breaks down in the middle of the night and lockwood might just be your knight in shining armour

➻ bloody genius

after a long night of researching cases with lockwood, you do something you don't quite mean to

➻ jealousy jealousy (part two)

you and lockwood bond when you're his favourite waitress at arif's. maybe all that's needed to prompt a confession is good old-fashioned jealousy

➻ secret admirer

you've got a secret admirer ahead of valentine's day who seems intent on spoiling you

➻ to build a home

you're the only employee at lockwood & co who doesn't live at portland row, but you're beginning to think you should

➻ just blurry

lockwood rambles a lot when he's drunk and you fall victim to it

➻ what once was

you and lockwood hate each other -- you have since you were young. but when your teams have to work together, deeper feelings come to light

➻ ode to my family

(relicman!reader) lockwood tries to stop you from stealing sources for your family's business, he's quite persuasive

➻ opening doors

you're lockwood's secret girlfriend, but when he hasn't called you after a case, you have to go find him and reveal your private relationship

➻ miscommunications

you think lockwood likes lucy, he thinks you like george. neither of those facts are true.

➻ nice towel

the deleted scene if it was you and you were dating lockwood

➻ reaching out

l+co encounter a case a little too close to home for lockwood. luckily you're always there for him

remus lupin ✩

➻ kiss me on the dance floor

you and remus keep meeting in the bathroom at parties whilst holding your friend's hair back

➻ the way i see you

you're an artist and you wish your best friend could see himself the way you see him, but you endeavour to try

sirius black ✩

➻ tell me when you're sober

sirius calls you drunk at a house party and confesses something he probably shouldn't

➻ red carpets

both actors in different projects, you see sirius on the red carpet of an awards show and think he's gorgeous

james potter ✩

➻ 5 people james potter didn't mean to kiss (and one he did)

title says it all -- james potter is a very affectionate person

➻ lifeguard!james 2 3 4 5

➻ a little man power

neighbour!james meets you as you're moving into the building

➻ overheard that she was nineteen

you're sad on your 19th birthday but james is there to make you feel better

➻ summer friends 2

you and james both get made head counselors at your summer camp but bump heads a few times in the process

➻ our names in the paper

luke castellan ✩

➻ you never disappointed me

two three four five

10 things i hate about you!AU, luke gets paid to take you out so beckendorf can have his chance with silena

➻ unlucky

when clarisse can't drive you to your exam anymore, luke steps in as a favour and happens to be able to help your anxiety

percy jackson ✩

➻ pumpkin head

you and percy try the pumpkin head trend

luke patterson ✩

➻ new release

you find out luke is your neighbour only after blasting his new album all day, but he doesn't seem to mind

➻ sick days

you're not feeling well, but luke is here to look after you

spencer reid ✩

➻ sex on the beach

chilli margaritas

you're a bartender at the bar the bau frequent and you can tell spencer doesn't like his beer.

elle greenaway ✩

➻ do i make you nervous?

the woman taking your witness statement is stunning and it makes you nervous

monty the crow ✩

➻ boys r dumb

you find monty after edwin rejects him (platonic)

trevor spengler ✩

➻ lamest place in the world

you meet trevor and have a fun night together in an otherwise boring small town

neil perry ✩

➻ love's light wings

you meet neil at a party and accidentally recreate romeo and juliet's balcony scene

[mostly-marvel-musings]

The whole Tony behaving like a cat thing lowkey got me thinking about calling him kitten 👀

Kitten

Pairing: Young! Tony Stark x Reader

Warnings: 18+ handjob? dirty talk. Sub! Tony.

Main Masterlist

.

If there were one thing you loved and hated in equal parts was seeing your drama boy, the genius Anthony Edward Stark stomp away from you and pout those incredibly kissable lips.

On one hand he was upset or angry at you and on the other he always managed to look too adorable for you to resist.

“Are you even listening to me?”

“You know I am.”

Tony’s arms were crossed and an annoyed look adorned his handsome face as he watched you tend to your adopted cat, Gelato.

He had been terribly sick a few days ago and was recovering, meaning you spent most of your time looking after him that included cancelling a few dates and zoning out on Tony.

He had been patient, truly, even for Tony being the hyperactive guy he was. Today however, he had some really exciting news he wanted to share with you, and all of your attention was pulled from him towards Gelato.

Tony had stormed outside your bedroom and plopped himself on the couch, his back to you and held a pillow to his chest, pouting.

Nothing a little extra TLC wouldn’t cure.

As you made your way towards your sofa that sat a very irritated Anthony Stark, you couldn’t help but smile as he sensed your presence and shook his head.

“What the odds of my other kitten forgiving me tonight?”

You smiled, not missing Tony’s side glance at your nickname for him.

“Very slim. And don’t call me that.” He huffed, not moving from his place as you leaned over the back of the couch so your lips were closer to his ear.

“Why? I know you secretly love it, kitten..” you dropped your voice as you gently tugged the pillow Tony was clutching away; smirking as you felt his breath catch for a second before he recovered.

Your smirk only grew deeper as you pressing your lips to his ear, slowly trailing them down his neck, practically feeling his defences melt away.

“I have ignored you, haven’t I? Allow me to apologise, Anthony.” You murmured against his skin, feeling victorious as Tony mumbled half a response, shifting in his seat as he allowing you to peel his t-shirt off of him.

Your hands shamelessly trailed down his neck to his chest, playing with his nipples enough to elicit a little moan all the while your lips littered his face with kisses.

“Just kiss me.” Tony whispered urgently, swallowing your grin by slanting his mouth over yours.

He tasted of bitter coffee and gum he’d had earlier, making you hum into the kiss as one of your hands snaked down his torso over his sweats-covered bulge.

“And I haven’t paid attention to you either, have I, my darling kitten?”

Tony let out a muffled moan against your mouth, hips reacting instinctively to your touch as you palmed his clothed erection. You let your fingers card through his soft hair, tugging gently as your tongue battled with his.

“Is this what you want? Answer me.”

You broke the kiss momentarily to look into those coffee brown eyes that were now hooded, filled with need. Obliging to his wordless nod, you let your hand slip inside his pants and boxers, his dick reacting to your touch.

You wrapped your hand around his thick member, stroking him languidly while Tony trailed his lips down your jawline, letting out soft grunts often as you continued your ministration.

“You’re such a good boy, Tony. So needy for me.”

Your words only spurred him on, hips moving on their own accord to match your hand as you swiped your thumb to gather precum from the tip of his cock.

He pulled his boxers down for you, making you chuckle before silencing whatever smart ass comment would leave your mouth.

You watched the way his chest rose and fell as you brought him closer to the edge, his cock twitching in your hand as you continued stroking him; all while Tony buried his face in your neck, letting out sounds that travelled straight to your core.

“Go on kitten. Come for me.” You whispered.

“God yes!”

Tony let out a muffled grunt before his cock spilled his seed over your hand and his lower abdomen, snuggling closer to you despite the position.

“You did so good for me, Tony.”

Try as he may to deny, Tony Stark was a sucker for this; your attention, especially when his temper tantrums led to this. He had felt safe enough to be his most authentic self around you, that included occasionally letting out his submissive side.

You cleaned him up later and joined him on the couch, grabbing your phone and typing something that piqued Tony’s interest.

“What are you doing?”

Instead of answering, you simply showed your phone to the man, where his contact details were open. You laughed out loud as he rolled his eyes and pushed you away playfully, unable to hide a smile that threatened to form on his face.

You had edited his name from Tones to My Kitten.

Who wrote this in the back of a car on her way to work? Yours truly.

[stevetonyweekly]

SteveTony Weekly - November 26th

I’m traveling this weekend (at this point I’ve been in the car about 5hrs and have another 8 to go today) so I asked for a few tropes to share fics from. Thanks so much to @ishipallthings & @iwillsinkwithmyships for their suggestions. 

As evere, please leave comment and kudos for your author. 

~*~ 

Bodyguard AUs: 

it goes like this -- by Areiton 

It goes like this, really--

He wants Tony. 

He wants him like he needs air to breath, wants to wipe away all the ones who came before him with mouth and tongue and bruise tight hands. 

He wants Tony and he’s terrified. 

I could lie tangent to your curves by RurouniHime 

Steve is bodyguard to a prominent young socialite with too much genius on his hands... and who has taken an unfortunate shine to him.

(Written for royal_chandler, who won the bid for my offer in Marvel Trumps Hate 2018.)

Triple-A Rated by iam93percentstardust 

Three assassination attempts in two weeks. That's gotta be some kind of record. Three attempts - and that doesn't even count the Ten Rings. Tony's pretty sure that Stane's trying to kill him again. Fury's pretty sure of the same thing, which is why he starts sending agents to protect him. It's just that Tony doesn't like any of his new bodyguards - except one.

Safety by CSHfic, VSfic 

The suit needs repairs, and Tony thinks he's being clever when he tells the Avengers that Iron Man is away on personal business...until Steve helpfully volunteers to be Tony's bodyguard in his place.

Historical AU 

Looking for Heaven by foxxcub

When young Lord Anthony Stark learns Steven Rogers has enlisted in the army, he thinks he's seen the last of his tiny, headstrong, haughty stable boy. But four years later, Lord Stark gets an unexpected visit from Steve, whose mother has fallen gravely ill and into financial ruin. Even more unexpected, Steve agrees to a shocking proposal: they will marry, giving Steve the necessary funds to save his mother, and Tony the much-needed reprieve from harassing would-be suitors. It is a business arrangement, nothing more. But as time goes on and circumstances arise, Tony begins to learn that keeping his heart away from his husband is easier said than done.

Maybe Tomorrow by scifigrl47

Tony Stark may well be the richest man in America. In the depths of the Great Depression, that's no small claim. When a plot is hatched for him to take in an orphan for a week, everyone knows it's a publicity stunt. No one knows it better than Officer Steve Rogers, but he's got a job to do, and he's going to do it. Doesn't mean he's going to approve.

Yes, it's an Annie AU.

Yes. That Annie.

Love Match by FestiveFerret

Tony had but one goal for the season: secure a marriage proposal from an alpha with the position and means enough to remove him from his father's house. Love was wholly irrelevant to the matter.

Peep Show by BladeoftheNebula

“Alright there, Sugar?” A voice came from behind him and he whipped around to see an omega with a little box of tokens. “You know you got to put one in to start right?”

Steve felt his face heat. “Yes ma’am. I was just uhh—“

“First timer?” He nodded and she gave him an encouraging smile. “Well, don’t worry, there’s glass behind the curtain, so the omegas can’t bite.” Then she winked. “That costs extra.”

Steve’s face got even hotter. He certainly wasn’t doing that.

Steve knew he wasn't any omega's first choice, or hell, even third. But what starts as a visit to a seedy Peep Show in Manhattan ends up changing his life for good.

An Inglourious Affair by morphia

In 1944, Steve's commando team, The Basterds, are off to fight nazis in France. Tony joins their efforts after intelligence suggests that Herr Kleiser, a German scientist, has set his sights on making a massive nuclear bomb. Their mission: Get to Kleiser before he completes his evil plan. What neither of them had planned for, however, was to fall in love in the middle of the worst war either of them had ever seen.

Mail Order Bride/Arranged Marriage 

Object: Matrimony by BladeoftheNebula

Omega Tony Stark craves adventure and an escape from the life his parents have planned for him in New York. He places a listing in a marriage catalogue to seek a match with an alpha out West, and Sheriff Steve Rogers answers his advertisement. But finding a nice alpha doesn't mean it's all smooth sailing from there...

I Whisper Your Name on Each Star I See Falling by JezebelGoldstone, littleblackbow

The day Natasha first told Steve her idea, he never would have dreamed that her fool notion would land him here: watching the train roll into the station and trying to wrap his mind around the fact that somewhere in there is the man who agreed to marry him.

Steve, an alpha farmer living outside a small town in the Rockies who doesn't want to admit how lonely he is, has been exchanging letters with omega Tony for nearly a year. When at last Tony arrives in Big Eden, Steve is confronted with the fact that he doesn't know Tony as well as he thought he did - and falls for him harder than a landslide anyway.

rearrange my heart (to fit your smile) by starklystar

"You dare," Howard's chair makes an ugly noise as it scrapes against the stone floors, the chatter of the room shifting into hushed whispers and stolen glances. "I am your father and your King!"

"My King is my husband," Tony tips his chin up, defiant. "And I refuse to hear you suggest that my husband has been anything other than good to me."

Next to him, he feels Steve's shoulders stiffen in surprise.

Howard's fist slams loud on the table. "Your husband does not even love you!"

Tony jerks back, burned. He knows that. Knows that Steve did not marry him for love – does not need any reminder of the cold truth, of what he desperately yearns for and can't even hope to have – but the harshness of Howard's words was scalding, and Tony can't afford for this to go any further.

----------

Or, King Steven marries Prince Tony, Tony is pretty sure he shouldn't panic when he falls in love with his own husband, and Steve tries his very best not to cause diplomatic crises.

Keyword: try

[wordsarelife]

—i forgot that you existed

pairing: anthony lockwood x sibling!reader

summary: the reader had a bad day at school

warnings: none i think

notes: pretty short, soz! :(

you tossed your backpack across the room, slumping down in your usual seat on the couch of the living room.

your brother was sitting in his chair, mindlessly turning the pages of one of his magazines, completely ignoring you, until you sighed loudly.

he closed the magazine and looked at you expectingly.

“hey” you greeted.

“hi” he smiled hesitantly “how was school?”

“unbearable” you muttered frustrated “i hate going there”

“who doesn’t?” lockwood smiled and you could help but grin a bit at his words.

“you’re right” you said “school is pointless, i don’t even know why i have to go there, it’s not like i’m learning anything anyway. and it’s a building full of miserable and awful people who have nothing better to do than being mean”

“woah” lockwood raised his arms, surprised at your sudden rant and the shift in mood “where is all this coming from? you used to love going to school”

“well, i don’t anymore” you crossed your arms, falling back into the comfortable cushion of the couch.

lockwood sighed, before he got up and sat down on the couch next to you. “do you want to tell me what happened?”

“it’s nothing”

“it’s definitely not nothing” lockwood argued, shaking his head “something that happened has made you so angry that you suddenly hate going to school, doesn’t sound like you”

“yeah” you sighed “i know”

“so? care to share with your brother?” he was wearing that sympathetic smile that always got you to open up to him. he knew how to make you feel safe and heard and you always told him everything.

“i just got a bad grade today”

“oh” he nodded “which subject?”

“english” the silence was loud and you looked up to witness the surprised expression on your brothers face.

“english?” he repeated “that’s your best! your so good at it”

“i know” you breathed “that’s the reason it’s bothering me so much. even harry mace got a better grade! and i know for a fact that he stays up all night playing video games”

“i’m sorry, y/n” lockwood patted your shoulder “that sucks”

“yeah and not only that, but i also have a math exam next week and i understand nothing of what we talked about. it makes up 50% of the grade, i can’t flunk this one”

“shit” lockwood muttered and you nodded.

“indeed”

“i’m sorry school is hard, right now” lockwood said, while you nodded “but it’ll get better eventually”

“i know, it’s just a lot right now”

“yeah” he smiled “but don’t worry we’ll help you. you know, george is quite the genius when it comes to math and lucy is great in english. you just have to get back in your flow and everything will be alright”

“you’d really do that?”

“of course” he laughed “we’re your family. and please let me know if anyone is being mean or bullying you, alright?”

“thank you” you hugged your brother tightly and you could feel the relaxation set into your features.

“always” lockwood nudged your elbow “do you smell that? seems like george has cooked something for us”

you didn’t need to hear that twice, already on your way down to the kitchen. you were glad that you had a good home and people you could always count on.

“just let me know if i can do something for you, whenever” you said to lockwood, when he arrived at the kitchen door “i’m always there for you too”

he smiled at your genuine offer and nodded gratefully “i will” he assured, before he followed you inside.

[weclassybouquetfun]

Everyone Gets Lost in SALTBURN.

Including me, as I've gloried in this film three times -enduring the annoying Academy aspect ratio format (writer/director/filmmaking genius Emerald Fennell explained this ratio was used to accommadate the squareness of the estate and to enhance close-ups).

I love films that are bold and audacious; ones that are polarizing and divisive because that means it has touched the audience - for good or for bad - they have been given food for thought. Now, you may savour it, or vomit it out but you will wolf it down. I don't see how anyone could look at this film and be bored.

TL;DR

WARNING: MORE SPOILERS THAN ROOMS IN SALTBURN

THE GOOD

EVERYTHING. Barry Keoghan owns every single frame of this film. He gets to use so many colours in his acting palette and while I don't have faith in the Academy, I hope that they nominate him at least.

Same goes for Archie Madekwe as Farleigh. He is the Tom Wambsgans of SALTBURN (complimentary). He's a hanger-on who hates the other hanger-on. Fennell could have just written him as one note - just nasty and cruel bully, but he had more dimensions than that.

We get a glimpse at how he hates that his mother has to beg (by way of Farleigh) for financial support. He could have just been someone who held the attitude of, "I've got mine, now get yours", but it bothers him that his mother is struggling. He hates that he lives a pampered life while the footmen are ignored. I especially love how he has no shame over being taken care of by the Cattons. Kicked out of 3 schools for blowing teachers? Oh, well. Sir James' connections will get him somewhere.

He sets up Oliver to karaoke to The Pet Shop Boys' "Rent" and when Oliver remarks, "Felix, I think this song is yours too." (a line that never failed to pull a reaction from me), Felix doesn't tuck his tail between his legs. He's not embarrased. No, he gladly takes the mic.

Then there is Rosamund Pike who is never not fantastic in everything. Elspeth is so droll, so cutting, yet so loveable.

Pike tosses out these lines that carry such humour in it, effortlessy. Like Farleigh, Elspeth is someone you probably should dislike - not batting an eye when discussing Pamela's death, judgmental, gossipy - but she, like Sir James are charming. Their obliviousness comes across as a mere quirk in their personality versus a deal-breaker.

The humour. This movie is so funny. What I appreciated though is that where most directors would put laughs to diffuse the preceeding scene, Fennell plays it straight. You are sat there without any quip or hammy performance to distract from Oliver drinking Felix's cummy bathwater and lapping the drain for good measure.

Or from Oliver and Venetia's menstrual blood swapping. Or grief stricken Oliver humping Felix's grave. The laughter, however comes from the audience. I've seen it three times so I've experienced three different audience reactions and I was surprised by how much people laughed (and gasped. Or closed their eyes), when to me it was serious bizness.

The first screening I attended had a Q&A with the film's composer, Anthony Willis, and he said that when he does panels with Emerald she always apologies to the audience for the pervisity. Why apologize, Emerald?! Talk your talk!

The only scene I could think of where humour was added to diffuse a scene was when Oliver kills Elspeth and he's draped over her trying (and failing) to put her limp arms around him. I think that was necessary so audiences can go into the end scene of him dancing victoriously through his ill-gotten estate.

-When Felix starts clueing in that Oliver lied. The way the unasked question where they pull up to Oliver's home. You can see that he's taken aback by a supposed addict would live there. Then you can tell the realization is falling on him when he spots the lawn being watered because what hardcore adcict would care about maintaining the lawn? But it's the "Gone Fishin'" sign that made him realize he's been duped. Jacob played it so well because it was very understated. Even the entire scene with Oliver's parents (played by Dorothy Atkinson who displayed that same fierce love of her child in "Pennyworth" and Shaun Dooley who's usually playing a tough nut.).

THE BAD

The bad actually has nothing to do with the film itself. It's the perception of Felix that Jacob Elordi and Emerald Fennell holds. They both paint Felix in the most terrible light with Elordi saying Felix is scarier than his character in EUPHORIA and Fennell calling him callous, misogynistic and racist. While I can see where she paints him as such in the film (leaving Oliver to walk his bike back to campus, not talking to the girl/s he's going to have it off with, just hitting her on the butt and walking off with her, having the very tone-deaf attitude of "not seeing race" by telling Farleigh that he doesn't care that he's "different" from them. But does that make him a truly awful person? Maybe it makes me an apologist because I can see how Felix's life of privilege makes him oblivious on how to treat people.

Fennell says her direction to Elordi was that Felix is a bad kisser and bad at sex because he never has to try; he doesn't need to impress. That makes sense because if one is wealthy and/or conventionally beautifully those things does the heavy lifting and grants you a ton of leeway. Since it works for him, why would he even think he needs to pivot on his behaviour?

I just don't see Felix being a terrible person. He ran interference for Oliver at the bar, he tried to get someone to hook Oliver up with a friend, he ditched the graduation party to support Oliver after the "death" of his father. Duncan was so crushed by Felix's death that he couldn't even close the curtains. Liam or Joshua (the Footmen Farleigh said Felix didn't know the names of) ran off crying after closing the curtains while Felix's body passed by. You would think if he was such a horrid person the staff wouldn't be so affected by his death. He pushed Oliver to stay for dinner at his parents house because he could see how much it meant to them to just have homemade SpagBol and cake.

He may be oblivious and has blindspots, but I'm not buying that he's abominable.

THE REST

-When Venetia is telling the story about the doppleganger, there's a window to the garden behind her and you see a man in a pink shirt walking past, then we cut to the reactions at the table to her story and Felix is wearing a pink shirt. Could it be Felix's doppleganger? A harbinger of his death in the garden? If we take Felix seriously, Saltburn is inhabited by Felix's dead granny. What's one more supernatural occurrence?

-In the credits are images that alludes to what has transpired: we see a spider because Venetia tells Oliver Sir James calls him Spider-Man because she skulks and she says he spins his web, she thinks he's more of a moth (I say he's a kitsune. He's a shapeshifting, beguiling trickster.).

There's a puppet on a string - and that has a dual meaning of the shoebox theatre of Catton family puppets that Felix examines when he first arrives at Saltburn and latter stops in front of at the end when he fixes their memorial rocks atops it; and also how Felix was ultimately a puppet master. There's also an ouroboros and a pair of glasses, which I loved seeing because Oliver sheds his glasses when he gets into Felix's circle. We eventually realize that they were merely an affectation. A costume he adorned to get in order to get into the character as humble, unassuming scholarship kid and shedding him once he was ensconced in Felix's circle.

-I ponder whether Felix truly considered Oliver a friend. Ewan Mitchell's Michael (the other asocial scholarship kid) warned Oliver that Felix would get bored with him. Venetia tells Oliver that she likes him better than the last one. Her words seemed like this is Felix's folly and he does this all the time and Oliver was merely another stray. Then we hear from Felix that a friend he invited had a fling with Venetia and it ruined his friendship. Maybe Felix doesn't get tired of these guys, but they make a mere (perceived) misstep and he ends the friendship. We see it almost happen when Felix yelled at Oliver for making a fuss about the state of his dorm room. Which is why Oliver deployed Operation Dead Dad - he needed a gambit in order to not lose Felix's friendship.

There were a few times where Felix could have ditched Oliver, but he didn't. If he's as flighty as people perceive him to be then I think he would have just made an excuse for Oliver to not attend the fancy dress party. Cancellation wasn't the only option. He could have just pulled an Elspeth and had Sir James make Oliver leave in the dead of the night.

Instead, even after everything he now knows about Oliver's deception, Felix looks crushed after their talk in the maze. His anger from earlier seemingly turned to sadness. Maybe his apparent dejection stemmed from what Oliver said to him: how he was just giving Felix what he wanted; thus (screw you Farleigh, "thus" is a good word) probably making Felix ponder whether everyone around him are playing roles - court jesters trying to appease Felix their king and no relationship he has with anyone outside his family is authentic.

Or maybe Felix had sexual interest in Oliver (because I don't think anyone had a romantic interest in each other in this film; sexual/carnal/opportunistic, yes)? It's powerful when someone obviously wants you. Even if you didn't have any prior interest in that person the, "What if?" or "Why not?" aspect comes into play and you want test how far it could go. Venetia told Oliver, "Felix doesn't like to share his toys. Even the ones he doesn't want to play with anymore." Maybe he just liked male attention, but had no intention of following through. I don't know. Maybe Oliver wasn't the only unreliable narrator.

"I wasn't in love with him."

[3rddimension]

Another angle of why S and C could be keeping things private that I haven't seen discussed as much is the possible misogynistic backlash to C's comedy chops. If C hadn't had the year they just had in 2023 - massive director flex with the funeral roast; repeat bits in TNTL that even other cast members are referencing; so much fan love for appearances on games/lives; fans acknowledging the work S & C individually did to keep Smosh alive pre-Anthony return - then I could see S and C keeping it under wraps longer.

WHY I SAY THAT - there used to be a long running bit (they both participated in) about S ghost-writing C's tweets. Or C being "lady S" (roast joke). That they look alike, or are funnier versions of each other. Heck - C Freakin' Miller is a spoof of C by S. While I think the jokes from the Smosh team are hilarious and good-natured - I've seen stuff in the comments about how C isn't funny without S. Or S is the funniest version of C.

After the year that C just had, I think their work speaks for itself. It always has. But it will ALWAYS be harder for a woman/NB person to prove they're funny in the world of comedy. Plus S is hysterical, and a genius at his craft, plain and simple. The "S is Smosh operating at 99%" joke is in many ways true. But I feel like C is finally starting to get the credit they long deserve, entirely separate from S. That's got to be so hard to cheer S on while also wanting your own separate credit in the eyes of fans.

I would hate them going public and there being comments like - "oh THAT'S why C has been so funny." I hope folks have grown past that. I'd love to hear your thoughts on this!

Oh yeah it's definitely one of the factor that I was thinking as well. Since it's pretty much happened with Saige and Damien relationship way back in the day.

I also think that Smosh got so much room for their cast and crew to be able to learn and grow. You can see people like Kimmy and Erin growing into producer role in real time and ofc Courtney who went into full fledged producer/director role. Ian's pretty much nailed the mindset of his company.

[chronicangel]

Groupie

Link to this fic on AO3. Words: 2963 Date posted: May 27, 2024

Summary: He’s working for an extremely secretive government organization entirely intent on destroying Superman. So which is worse: That he has a crush on a journalist, or that that journalist is also a Superman groupie?

Lex sits in a chair as far away from the center of the room as he can get, chin propped on a fist, elbow propped on a table with some largely ignored snacks on it, and knee bouncing nervously. He hates these sorts of PR events. They always remind him of his days as an unappreciated assistant, whose primary job, above using his genius intellect to build impressive new tech the likes of which the world had never seen, was making Anthony Ivo look good. At least now his job is mainly to make sure that the companies working with the government to fund his newest endeavors stay happy with the projects and don’t spill too much information publicly.

Several feet away from him, he sees two stuffy old men whose names he can’t keep straight talking to each other in hushed tones. Just as he’s pushing himself out of his chair to go check on what, exactly, they’re whispering about at this extremely public event, he bumps into someone fetching something from the snack table, sending all of the food on their plate directly into their chest. His eyes blow wide, and he scrambles to try to grab some napkins from the table while he spits out, “I am so sorry, I should have been paying more attention to-- you!”

The man across from him is at least a head shorter than him, which isn’t hard given how lanky and awkward Lex has always been. He’s almost 25 years old and his sister still insists every time that he visits her that he’ll fill out soon. His suit-- which is nice, but not remotely the right type of suit for this event, and privately Lex wonders how he got in-- is smeared with chocolate cake, potatoes, cheese, and gold flakes, dark colors and awfully textured mush marring the white button-up and khaki vest. “It’s Jimmy Olsen, right?”

Jimmy blinks up at him a few times, long eyelashes practically brushing against his cheekbones, and then smiles like nothing bad has ever happened at all. “Yeah! And you’re Alex, right?”

Lex can’t help but grimace. “It’s Lex, now,” he says, and then adds somewhat lamely, “I’m trying something new.”

“Lex… I like it!” Jimmy says, clapping Lex on the back and then taking the handful of napkins from him to start carefully dabbing at his shirt, trying to at least get some of the chunks off. “So what are you doing here? Ivo’s still in prison, right?”

He gives an awkward cough of a laugh. “I… I think so! I haven’t really kept track since he isn’t my boss anymore and everything,” he dismisses, probably more quickly than is natural. The reality is that he’s sort of the lead researcher for the team trying to figure out what, exactly, to do with Dr. Ivo. Waller figures he’s got a better shot at it than anybody else. “What about you? I didn’t think this event was open to the press…”

“Oh, I’m not here in a press capacity!” Jimmy laughs, waving a dismissive hand. “I have a pretty huge stake in the Daily Planet now and Perry didn’t really want to come, so I’m here as more of a business type of guy.” He looks down at his shirt, messy napkins crumpled up in his hand, having picked up as much as they’re going to. “Man, I think this thing’s done for.”

“Sorry,” Lex says again, rubbing at the back of his neck now. “I can cover your dry cleaning bill, if you want?” He offers. He gets a substantial stipend from the US government now for his work with Waller and Task Force X, and really, he has no idea what to spend on it anyway.

“How about you just buy me a drink? One with gold in it! I wanna hear about what you’ve been up to since our little chat at S.T.A.R. Labs. Clearly you’ve been up to something cool since you’re at this party for whatever mysterious reason you won’t tell me,” he says, throwing an arm around Lex’s shoulders like they’re old friends.

Lex’s cheeks flush as he gets basically dragged to the bar by this guy, sparing a glance to the pair of old guys. They’re not talking anymore, at least.

“Um,” he starts lamely. Lex has never really been a drinker. He pretty much only has champagne when he’s forced to come to these stupid parties, and even then, it’s mostly to blend in with the elite socialite types, so he rarely ends up drinking more than one glass. “Could my friend here get… a glass of champagne? Uh, with gold flakes in it,” he asks the bartender, who nods and immediately picks up a glass.

“Champagne with gold flakes?” Jimmy asks with raised eyebrows, looking at Lex with the most skeptical expression he’s ever seen. “That’s the best you can do? Did you even go to college?” Without waiting for an answer (not that Lex thinks it was really a genuine question), Jimmy waves at the bartender, “Hey, ix nay on the champagne. Get me two starry nights. Put it under Olsen’s tab.”

“Starry night?” Lex asks, immediately followed by, “Wait, wasn’t I supposed to buy you a drink?”

“Well, you just get the next round then,” Jimmy says with a sly grin. They’re silent until the drinks come, with Lex just staring at Jimmy like he’s an alien. The other man seems completely confident, like he’s not out of place at this sort of event at all. He’s overly friendly, too, like he thinks he can just make friends with anyone. Then again, considering the situation Lex has found himself in, he guesses that must work. Maybe he needs to start projecting more confidence… The drinks that are placed in front of them are two gradients from clear liquid into a rich, coffee brown color, with gold flakes floating throughout. “Now, hold your nose and shoot it all back.”

Lex hardly registers what’s happening before the drink is in his hand, their glasses are clinking together, and then he’s throwing his head back with his nose pinched between two fingers and pouring the alcohol down his throat. It’s not like champagne at all. It burns, and it tastes like gasoline. He almost gags, but he manages to get it down. The aftertaste is like some awful mix between cinnamon and black licorice, and he can’t imagine why college students would drink this on purpose.

“It’s bad, right?” Jimmy asks, and Lex stares at him.

“You’re the one who ordered it!”

Jimmy laughs, and the sound makes Lex’s cheeks tinge pink again, heat crawling up his face. “It’s not about tasting good,” he says, which doesn’t make any sense to Lex at all.

“Then what is it about?”

Jimmy is quiet for a second, staring into the empty glass like it has the answer. To what, Lex doesn’t know-- he doesn’t think it’s the question that he asked. He’s got a sort of nostalgic fondness on his face, like he’s remembering something important to him. Lex wants more than anything to know what it is.

“Sometimes, life is beautiful, but it tastes bad going down. That doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy it for the beautiful parts-- gold flakes, the warmth in your gut, the people you’re with. Why waste all your time on boring champagne?”

Lex stares at him for a second. It occurs to him, somehow not for the first time even though this is only the third time they’ve met, that Jimmy Olsen must be a very wise person. He wants to know how he got to be so wise.

Jimmy beats him to the punch. “Aaanyway,” he starts, pointing an accusing finger at Lex, “what have you been up to since the last time I saw you? I mean, it’s only been a couple months, and now you’re at this fancy party for rich people and your boss isn’t even running it. Well, maybe your boss is running it. Is your boss Loren Jupiter?”

He snorts. “I don’t even know what Loren Jupiter does,” he dismisses with a wave of his hand for dramatic effect. “Look, I’m not at liberty to say too much about it, but I’m kind of working for the government now.”

The other man stares for a second, and then turns to the bartender. “Yeah, we’re gonna need more drinks.”

The next several minutes are spent with Jimmy trying to ask Lex probing questions about his new job and Lex expertly dodging them, if he may say so himself. Jimmy orders more and more drinks, until eventually the flush in Lex’s cheeks won’t go away and he can feel himself loosening up way more than he reasonably can. He has to redirect this. “Okay, enough talking about me. What about you, Jimmy Olsen? I know you work at the Daily Planet, but why? Why journalism?”

Jimmy hums in consideration for a long moment, staring into his empty glass again. “My dad was in the military and went MIA when I was a baby. Mom always said that he probably died, but I knew something else had to be going on. I kind of went down this whole government conspiracy theory rabbithole,” he laughs, but Lex can tell from the edge to it that there’s more he’s not saying. “I looked for connections in places other people didn’t. I’ve always known that the world is a secretive place, and I’ve always wanted to uncover those secrets. But nobody ever really took me seriously. I wanted to go into investigative journalism at first, but writing was never really my strong suit. So, I picked up a camera.”

They’re both quiet for another long minute. Lex watches Jimmy, sees the way that sadness dulls the light in his eyes, those eyes the color of chocolate and coffee and whatever the hell is in these drinks. It fills him with a sort of… anger, in a way that he can’t describe. The world is a secretive place-- a secretive and unjust one full of Supermen who take all the power for themselves and narcissists like Ivo who think they’re better and smarter than everyone else while people like Lex and Jimmy do all of the work. No one ever took Jimmy seriously? How dare they? How dare they ignore what Lex can see so plainly-- a genius just like him? “One day people are really going to regret overlooking you, Jimmy. I can tell.”

The smile that Jimmy gives him is half-hearted, and it twists something unidentifiable in Lex’s chest. “Well, all of that is behind me now, anyway. I have a great job at the Planet, and great friends. Lois and Clark have always believed in me. And once Flamebird blew up for my coverage of Superman stuff, the Daily Planet bought it and now I guess I… well I guess people take that seriously, if nothing else,” he says, with that same edge as his laugh earlier.

Lex wants to yell about something. He doesn’t know what. These so-called friends, who clearly haven’t supported him enough? The fact that it took Superman to get Jimmy the recognition he’s deserved from the start? That he still seems to think no one takes him seriously for anything else? Before he can even open his mouth to try to lament any of this, though, Jimmy is smiling again and jabbing him in the shoulder with a finger. “Well what about you, then? How did you start working for Ivo? I mean, why would a nice guy like you build something like the Parasite?”

Even though he’s never felt ashamed of it before, suddenly, Lex doesn’t want to admit that the Parasite armor was actually his idea. There’s something about the way that he says it that makes Lex feel like he doesn’t approve, and he desperately wants his approval. For the first time, Lex is the one who waves down the bartender and requests another round of drinks, and he waits until they’ve been set in front of them and he feels that burn down his throat for what must be at least the half-dozenth time of the night before he starts saying anything. He doesn’t think he would have the guts to tell anyone this sober.

“When I was a kid, my father used to… he wasn’t…” He grasps for the words that usually come to him so naturally, his jaw locking up. Jimmy puts a hand on his wrist and looks at him with furrowed eyebrows, like he’s really concerned. Lex takes a deep breath.

“I grew up in Suicide Slum, here in Metropolis. My parents weren’t… the best. Mom just watched while Dad used to take stuff out on us. Me and my sister, Lena. She was always sick when we were kids, wheelchair-bound when she wasn’t bedbound, and I think my parents always blamed her for the fact that we didn’t have any money. You’d think that would make me the favorite child, but it was kind of like a race to the bottom. And I didn’t want to be the favorite, anyway. I just wanted to keep my sister safe. I wasn’t able to protect her, and it made me feel so… small. That’s why I worked with AmazoTech on the Parasite armor.” He conveniently leaves out the part where he’s the one who pitched it, and where that’s what got him the job in the first place. “I don’t think anyone should ever have to go through that, to feel that way. You shouldn’t have to be Superman to protect people-- and you shouldn’t have to rely on Superman to protect people either. What happens when he decides that the rest of us are like Lena? Sick people he can blame for all his problems?” He tries not to let too much bitterness leak into his voice, sinking in on himself a little. When he looks over at Jimmy, the other man’s jaw is hanging open, and Lex can’t read his face. It makes his stomach twist up in knots.

Finally, Jimmy seems to realize that he’s staring and composes himself, mouth snapping shut. He clears his throat. “I’m sorry that you went through all of that,” he says, and his voice is so earnest. “But I think you’re wrong about Superman,” he adds, and Lex can only stare at him, chest tight again. “That’s the exact kind of thing that Superman is trying to put a stop to in Metropolis.”

“By making himself the law?” Lex snaps, annoyance leaking into his voice. “Maybe he is trying to help people-- but who is he helping? Do you really think that it’s everyone? No one can care about everyone. He certainly doesn’t care about the criminals he beats up. He doesn’t care about the people whose cars he’s flipping and whose walls he’s caving in. He didn’t care about me when he shut down AmazoTech and I lost my job.”

Contrary to what Lex might expect, Jimmy’s face softens a little. He reaches a hand out and rests it on Lex’s shoulder, and Lex’s eyes flash to it for a second. He thinks his face would heat up if it wasn’t already about as hot as it could get from all of those drinks. “You’re hurting,” he starts. “I get that. Honestly, I was once really hurt by Superman, too. It felt like he was one of the people who was supposed to be there for me, and he wasn’t, y’know? But then he was. And I think one day, he’ll be there for you, too. Maybe that’ll take some time. But I believe that.”

Lex considers these words for a minute. Is it possible that Superman could save him, just like he saves so many other people every day? Maybe. That’s not what Lex wants, though. He doesn’t need some superhero to fly in and rescue him. He wants to rescue himself. He wants to rescue the people he cares about. He wants people to know that Lex Luthor is not some weak little boy who cowers in the corner in fear, but a genius who has the power to take down even Superman. No one and nothing is ever going to hurt Lex Luthor again.

But before he can even think about saying any of that or what a bad idea it would be, the bartender announces to the two of them, “Sorry, guys. Event’s over in fifteen minutes. I gotta start cleaning the bar.” Lex stares at him for a second, and then at Jimmy. His hand is still on Lex’s shoulder, and the last thing that he wants is for him to move it. He doesn’t want to part ways at all. He wants to invite Jimmy to continue this conversation somewhere more comfortable.

When Jimmy finally does pull his hand away, it feels like the skin where he touched him is burning. “Well, I guess that’s goodbye for now,” he says with a grin, holding the hand out for a handshake. Stunned, Lex shakes his hand, staring at the shorter man for a long moment. He wants to kiss him. He knows this is a bad idea, for a number of reasons, yet he can’t stop himself from staring at his mouth.

Jimmy leaves not long after that, and Lex watches him until he’s out the door, along with half of the rest of the crowd, his heart pounding against his ribs and his stomach twisted into knots. He’s working for an extremely secretive government organization entirely intent on destroying Superman. So which is worse: That he has a crush on a journalist, or that that journalist is also a Superman groupie?

[femmmie]

smoshblr tag game wheee!!!

“tagged” by the amazing @lumiereandcogsworth thank you <333

1. how long have you been watching smosh? I actually didn't know about their youtube channel for a minute while I did frequent smosh.com the website LOL so I don't really recall, but it's a long ass time lmao!

2. favorite smosh cast member(s)? Ian for suuuurrre also Anthony but I'm still mad at him for leaving x33 and I really love Amanda she is so magical. She is truly the best thing to happen to Smosh like, what an actress. What an ICON. She's larger than life and I am at her feet.

3. favorite pairing(s)?

I mean, let's be real. It's Ianthony <3 I do love Amangela, but the thing is... my eyes are on Amanda only, I've found out about myself x3 maybe a self-insert ship with me and Amanda hahaha what?

4. favorite reoccurring character? Listen, Fred Darts is an instant classic, he NEEDS to return and continue to be iconic.

5. favorite smosh video? yesss another opportunity to spread the Claus Winklestein agenda >:) the bi-con we need but don't deserve x)

The video is so problematic for so many reasons lmao but it remains my absolute favorite. Something about Anthony as a girl *_* is always SO mesmerizing like?? The whole concept is genius, there's subplot, there is character development, the bisexual energy is off the charts and I have lots of thoughts about lots of scenes that I won't get into here bc I hate discourse lmao. But it's really something. I was like 'bring back claus winklestein!' in one of the member chats and they didn't even remember him and I was very offended LMAO <3

6. first video that got you into smosh? truly I don't remember but one of the first ones I do remember are the lip-syncing ones of course.

7. favorite picture of the cast?

I love this moment lmao the dynamic of Angela and Chanse being reverse boomers like they have no idea what is going on

8. favorite picture of your fave?

I love everything about this whole shoot 🙏🙏🙏

9. what smosh series do you want to see more of?

I really would like more Sword AF but with video x3 I would even like it to have higher production value so they can cut to scenes of them in full constume, cgi stuff and playing out some scenes 🥹

10. dream guest on smosh mouth?

*heavy breathing* I'm pleading the fifth

tagging: @only-frann @generaltrashshecox @smoshidiot @hecoxthirst @wazurenaide @lilac-hecox + anyone else who wants to do this! :D I'd love to read and watch your answers!

[jrueships]

anon who asked me to post some of the nba player sun+moon combos that make me feel different degrees of insane.. grah grawh. unprompted and unelaborated for now. will reblog with more later because there is always more

I AM NOT A PROFESSIONAL, idk if it's real or not & idc. it is fun & i like feeling like i am right abt things (i never am). leave me to my delusions please. im joking on these but also am i really

kyle lowry: ☀️ Aries, 🌙 virgo

what a bitch combo, people can't staaand you, huh! one moment you're having friends <3 you're having fun <3!! the next you're having a moment where you accidentally snap and regret everything but not fast enough for your friends and now all those friends of yours that made you so happy are gone and in the wind <3 with the only one left to blame being the only one left all alone : you <3 !!!

Ja Morant: ☀️ leo, 🌙 leo

do you even have your own personality at this point if we take away every outside influence youve tacked on to protect it or what. but hey, keep live, breathing, dying to the method acting, right 🥰 ?? cause when they hate you, it's not really hating YOU, huh? it's actually pretty genius !! ... i don't think YOU even know who's the real you at this point anyways, so no one will EVER hate the you you really are inside!! AND!!!!! they won't ever Love It either !

phenomenal acting ja! you're nothing without entertaining, as always 🥰 !! 🩵🩵

Anthony Edwards: ☀️ leo, 🌙 aquarius

'im not like OTHER girls'

* posts video of him being H*mophobic. *

Draymond Green: ☀️ pisces, 🌙 gemini

you could murder someone and still be the victim ( you have . )

JJJ: ☀️ virgo, 🌙 scorpio

the face of a man that would die if he couldn't throw in his stupid two cents into a fountain that specifically has a sign against throwing two cents in it .

Pg: ☀️ taurus, 🌙 leo

outside you're lovable until the wrong person (a person who actually DOESNT want to feed into the luxury of your own ego, WHAAAT😱😱?!??? NO FUCKIN WAY 🙀!!! ... AUTONOMY ⁉️⁉️) spends too much time with you for them to realize that you're actually a piece of immature shit. not even solid, liquid. the worst kind of asshole is an unpredictable asshole. because they can hurt the hardest and get hurt the hardest ( when it's least expected ). BUT YOU DONT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT THAT TOO MUCH if you actively distance everyonee who DONT automatically feed into your own delusions and only surround yourself with people that do or make you feel secure to the fact that theyll never ever call you out enough for you to actually acknowledge how much your shit stinks!! because you devoted too much loyalty to them for that to even HAPPPENN!!! it's a COMPLETELY HEALTHY and MUTUAL and TOTALLY NOT CODEPENDENT relationship ‼️ they compliment YOU, feed into YOU, you give them what they want, work for them for whatever they want, you provide enough where they feel too weak alone without it.... or at least not Whole thanks to you merging to their side like a parasite BUT A HELPFUL ONE!!!! .. so they have no choice BUT to excuse your gluttony and your selfishness and stubbornness because man!! you just work SO hard, huh :( !! scorpios just HAVE to understand because they work just like you!! virgos too!! and cancers just HAVE to feel bad because you've done SOOOO much for them ALREADY , haven't YOU ? what a good relationship . it's so . ' loyal . '

they can't leave you because that'll tear out too much of the life YOU gave them !! they can't LIVE without you (now)!! and you know that because you made SURE of that !!!!!!! because you ONLY EVER actually try whenever it's what You want. if others end up benefiting from it as well. sure. whatever. as long as it always adds to Your wants and Your demands, they can have their little cookies or struggles or whatever other people face that aren't you .

( i just Know it eats him up everyday that he can't include cancer zodiac dame into his little circle of Close Friends That Are Close Friends Because They Agree With Me. i just Know It. )

double the loyalty with double the selfishness too! but you make sure only to hang out with the people that you KNOW need that loyalty so they can value it while excusing the .. certain cons that come with it. hopefully excusing it to the point of pretending it doesn't even exist!! that would be GREAT 😁😁!! ... considering that's the entire reason you did all this work in the First Fucking Place .

you're such a HEROOO, and if you can't be that... at least you can be mentioned as the sidekick! eitherway, you're getting the limelight you always work yourself (more like others) to view you in! congrats pg ! you really EARNED it.

deserved can be up to debate .

but wait, no actually. because you never let anyone in too deep that ever Dares debate with you! so nevermind . wow . congrats .

Deebo: ☀️ Leo, 🌙 Libra

leave me alone right now (DO N O T leave me alone i will CRY ) i just need some time to myself (WHY ARE YOU LEAVING M E ALONE?????? with TIME !?!?? to MYSELF????? WHOSE PERSONALITY CAN I BASE MINE OFF OF WHEN I'M ALONE ?@???? my OWN??!?!?!???) please just leave me alone or i might say something i don't mean ( please don't leave me alone or i might do something i might not mean ) i don't want to look clingy ( but let's be honest..) don't make me regret ( please )

Kd: ☀️ libra 🌙taurus

Keldon: ☀️ libra 🌙 scorpio

oh i just KNOW that preservation lying is Prominent and Delusional

Lebron: ☀️ capricorn 🌙 aries

all the achievements you already have pale when it comes to chasing after the unattainable. Living and yearning like a Gatsby

[dreamwritesimagines]

So I just read enamored and I NEED all the girls from both garden of secrets and enamored to be besties they would be unstoppable! Like, CeCe would be the brains of the operation, Cherie would be the chaotic one but would always remind them all of their worth and to never settle for less, Clover would be the stoic bodyguard type so no one would mess with them, and Charlotte would be the optimistic one but who has the most emotional intelligence and is able to read emotions very well. And omg I just realized all of their names start with C! It's meant to be!

And I know it wouldn't be possible cause both Cherie and Charlotte are both Anthony's love interest, but I have a solution to that. Charlotte and Hugh (this breaks my Lothany heart, but hear me out) fall in love with each other. She would so just surprise him and one day it would just hit him that he's in love with Charlotte. And I know he said he doesn't want a marriage but if anyone can break him of that vow it would be sunshine personified! (Am I projecting my own love of Hugh onto him and Charlotte, yes. Am I gonna apologize for it, absolutely not!) And she would be such a great addition to their family like I can totally see her bonding with his sisters and just being such a great listener and influence on them! And because Hugh was so protective of his family, he falls more for her when he sees that she treats them with nothing but kindness!

And we know he would treat her right! (Anthony's a hot mess in Enamored and Charlotte deserves better than that lol) Also, I just realized that both Hugh and Clover came from abusive households, Charlotte is just a breath of fresh air and positivity who gives them all the love they missed out on growing up and I think that's beautiful. She's like a magnet for finding abandoned puppies and giving them a loving home❤️.

ok idk why I did that to myself, now I'm shipping Hugh and Charlotte help!

DARLING HOW DOES IT FEEL TO BE A GENIUS, HOW!? 😱😍

I have so many ideas about this omg thank you so much! ❤️ This is amazing! ❤️

First of all, they would be such good friends and an unstoppable friend group for sure 😍

Secondly, Charlotte and Hugh?! YES! YES PLEASE! 😍

Okay so my instant headcanon (yes I already have headcanons for them) is that Clover introduced them but Cherie instantly saw the potential love between them, and the next time she threw a ball, she made sure both Charlotte and Hugh were there and kind of made sure to mention some unpleasant lord was planning on asking Charlotte for a dance which made Hugh ask her before that guy could 😂 So Anthony would totally notice the gleam in her eyes and follow her line of sight and go like,

"Darling?"

"Yes mon amour?"

"Please tell me you didn't throw an actual ball just so that you could matchmake those two."

"Of course I threw a ball to do that, Anthony!"

"Jesus-"

"Look at them! Look!"

"I am looking."

"They belong together!"

"They're just dancing."

"That's how it starts, I know they are meant to be. I told you the same about Cece and Elias and you didn't believe me, and look where we are."

"Alright but-"

"I also told you Benedict met the love of his love when those two first met, and you said and I quote, 'that's impossible darling', and what happened? They're so in love now."

"I still have no idea how that happened to be honest."

"You know how much I hate I told you so-"

"Do you? I think you love it."

"Maybe. But I told you so and I am telling you so now."

"Fine but we have a deal, you said three couples only this season."

"They're my third couple!"

"You're finished then? This early on?"

"...Well, if two people are meant to fall in love and be together, I cannot possibly stand in the way of fate, can I?"

Also also, Hugh would adore Charlotte for sure! 😍 Like, he would so play it cool but Cece would see right through it, and eventually Hugh would go like,

"So your friend, Miss Harlowe."

"Yes?"

"She's uh...she's lovely."

"That she is."

"What is it with Benedict and her? Is she heartbroken like people say?"

"She and Benedict have been friends forever, that is all."

"So she's not-she's not in love with him?"

"Not at all."

"Oh. Good."

"Why?"

"Hm?"

"Why is it good?"

"Uh...no reason at all. She's cute and deserves better than a broken heart, that's why."

[lesmotsnomades]

Nobel prize winner Olga Tokarczuk: ‘We live with violence and misogyny like some sort of constant illness’ | Olga Tokarczuk | The Guardian

Books interview / Interview

Nobel prize winner Olga Tokarczuk: ‘We live with violence and misogyny like some sort of constant illness’

Anthony Cummins

The Polish author on her new horror novel, the genius of John Cheever and chasing the London of her dreams

Sat 5 Oct 2024 19.00 CEST

Polish author Olga Tokarczuk, 62, was awarded the Nobel prize in literature in 2018, the same year that she won the International Booker for her fragmentary novel Flights, cited by the judges for its “wit and gleeful mischief”. Annie Proulx has compared her to WG Sebald; for the London Review of Books, her 900-page historical epic The Books of Jacob (translated by Jennifer Croft in 2021) stands alongside “the great postmodern meganovels by Pynchon or Perec, Bolaño or García Márquez”. Tokarczuk, via the interpreter Marta Dziurosz, was speaking from Wrocław, Poland about her new novel, The Empusium: A Health Resort Horror Story, set amid creepy goings-on at a sanatorium before the first world war.

Where did this book begin?

The idea occurred to me many years ago but I was deeply engaged in The Books of Jacob and this funny sort of pastiche novel had to wait, even though I often work on different books at the same time and was also writing Drive Your Plow Over the Bones of the Dead [2009] on top of everything else. What actually helped The Empusium was the pandemic: after all my travels because of the Nobel, I had the chance to return home to my nest in the forests of Lower Silesia.

What led you to base it on Thomas Mann’s 1924 novel The Magic Mountain?

I have a love-hate relationship with that book. I’ve read it five or six times since I was a teenager and every time I read it differently – it grows with the reader. What struck me was my exclusion from the novel as a reader, and a person, from the questions it asked and the answers it gave. It made me realise that when I stood in front of my father’s bookshelves as a girl – at home it was my father who was dealing with books – a huge majority of the classic novels I could see dealt only with issues between men. I think this experience is quite widespread: girls have to confront their own absence in literature. I wrote The Empusium slightly out of anger and spite, I suppose.

At what point did the horror element come in?

I adore horror. But I realised, too, that only the tools of that genre could portray the topic I wanted to portray – the hidden violence, the misogyny that is rife in the entirety of our culture, which we live with like some sort of constant illness, like a predator that is always present and emerges from time to time to attack us.

"My translator says I have a very British sense of humour that isn't picked up on as well in Poland"

Has winning the Nobel prize made a difference to your work?

My first reaction [to the win] was a certain stiffening. The Empusium was therapy: writing is important but it’s also fun and can bring fun, be wild. I intend to remain close to this attitude; I don’t want to get dragged in the direction of prize-giving ceremonies and celebration.

Is it surprising to be your UK publisher’s top seller?

Very, but Antonia Lloyd-Jones [her translator] says I have a very British sense of humour – she says it isn’t picked up on as well in Poland as it is in the UK!

Before becoming an author, you were a psychotherapist. Has that shaped your approach to fiction?

I think so. Therapeutic work opened me to the strangeness of human existence. I learned that each person is a walking book – and to listen without focusing on the story that was going on in my own head.

You also lived in the UK for a while. What do you recall about that?

It was 1987. I’d just finished university and came to London to learn English and work a little bit, as so many Polish people did. I worked at a hotel at the back of Harrods. I lived on Fulham Road and went to Camden Town with a very international [crowd] to drink wine. Coming from communist Poland, this world was a huge shock – seeing the incredibly well-stocked bookshops and record shops was like taking an elevator directly to the seventh floor. I’ve visited London many times in the past 10 years; I’ve searched for that 80s London, which still appears in my dreams, but I’ve been unable to find it.

Do you have a favourite horror author?

I find modern horror quite cliche-ridden. I like horror from the late 19th and early 20th century: Edgar Allan Poe, the stories of the poet Gérard de Nerval, Dostoevsky, who wrote wonderful smaller works of horror. In Poland, we had Stefan Grabiński, a magnificent interwar writer who marries old-fashioned horror with the machinery of industrial society. If you like horror, I recommend a short story by Dino Buzzati, Seven Floors [1954], which is absolutely terrifying.

What have you been reading lately?

This autumn I’ve been gathering short stories. I’ve returned to Chekhov via George Saunders’s A Swim in a Pond in the Rain. And John Cheever’s stories are absolutely genius; I was sorry when I finished reading the book, a feeling I haven’t had in a while.

Do you have a new project?

Yes, a very big novel I promised myself I’d write years ago: a sort of homage to people from Lower Silesia, this amazing area in central Europe which has been completely depopulated and then repopulated. It’s very dear to me, because I’m one of those people myself. Formally, the book is similar to Flights, but its panoptic vision requires a huge amount of intellectual effort and I feel very tired.

Name something you need in order to write.

Basic calm to hear the dialogue in my head. I’m incredibly happy when I’m thinking and writing; it’s a wonderful defence mechanism that I’ve developed against the trials of everyday life. But the story I’m writing now might be my last huge book, because I’ve been having horrible problems with my spine. My body says: “Tokarczuk, this position you’re in when you’re writing isn’t for you any more – you should retire.” And I think that’s what I’m going to do.

 The Empusium: A Health Resort Horror Story, translated by Antonia Lloyd-Jones, is published by Fitzcarraldo Editions (£12.99). To support the Guardian and Observer order your copy at guardianbookshop.com.

[mostly-marvel-musings]

Hello! Sorry, are you still accepting requests? If not, then just ignore it, and if you accept them, then could you write something about Tony and fem!reader who escape from some important event to the evening seashore just to take a break from the hustle and bustle around them? Maybe a reader works for him in a company and they presented some new product or it was a charity dinner... Kisses, elegant outfits, the night seashore and Tony Stark are all I want now😭😭 Sorry if it's too much! Have a great day :)

Escape

Pairing: Tony Stark x F! Reader

Warnings: 18+ kinda, fluff

.

“Would you please tell me where we’re going?”

“Nope.”

You huffed, not prodding further as you leaned back against the car seat as Tony sped up yet again, zooming further and further away from the gala dinner that you two had sneaked out of minutes ago.

“Mr. Stark! Over here please!”

“Tony! There’s someone I want you to meet.”

With literally ten people calling his name from all directions, it was surprising how Tony managed to get to them all and engage with public. It amazed you how this man had been doing it day in and day out for years, and with such panache.

You respected the man for what he had achieved, his vision, what he stood for, that was main reason you began working for Stark Industries. Drinks flowed as the evening faded into a dull but glittery night and you found yourself utterly bored.

The genius noticed you, finding you an hour later and grabbed you by your hand and the two of you were out the back door.

Palm trees of Malibu flew by as Tony passed them at lightning speed in his R8. The cool, night air made you shiver, the light fabric of your evening gown did little to shield you from it. The car came to a halt as quick as it had started, your heels slipping inside soft sand as you realised where he’d brought you.

The beach. At well past midnight, you were on the beach with the one and only Mr. Anthony Edward Stark.

“Really Tony?” Your expression was incredulous as you were met with Tony’s signature smirk and a wink before he opened the door for you and helped you out.

The sound of distant waves crashing against the shore brought a smile to your face; this was quite unlike something you had experienced before, especially with your boss.

Taking your heels off, you held them in one hand along with the train of your dress while Tony rolled up his sleeves after taking off that fancy jacket he wore, filling your lungs with the cool, salty air of the night.

“Big surprise?” He murmured, gauging your reaction as you walked side by side, heading towards the water until the last of the waves kissed your feet before religiously returning to the ocean.

“Pleasant surprise for sure. Why though? I thought you loved the attention.”

It probably came out a little like a jab though wasn’t meant to be one, luckily Tony didn’t mind the honesty, in face it was one of the things he quite liked about you right from day one.

“I was bored out of my wits and by the looks of it, so were you.” He shrugged, offering you his jacket after noticing a shiver that you tried to downplay.

As soon as you covered yourself with Tony’s jacket, his scent enveloped your senses in the most inviting way. Intoxicating and magnetic, pretty much something that summed Tony up for you, he was rather hard to resist.

A hip flask poked out from the inside pocket of his jacket, of course. Fishing it out, you took a sip of the expensive liquor and handed it to him.

“Can’t say I hate this side of you. Well done, Mr. Stark.”

“I’m gonna take this as a compliment from the girl I’m trying to impress.”

You nearly tripped over your feet at his admission, you had to have been dreaming or at least misheard Tony. Maybe it was the alcohol you had consumed that was playing its tricks.

The moment your eyes met with his, your heart knew it was in big trouble. Months of resisting his brown, doe eyes had proved an impossible task but now, the way they bore into yours earnestly, so full of love, you were lost.

“What did you say?” Your voice was barely over a whisper, almost scared to have him say it out loud in fear of it being false.

“I like you Y/N. In fact, I think I may be falling in love.” Tony admitted, scratching the back of his head and stepping closer while his eyes searched yours for an answer.

It wasn’t out of the blue, but he wasn’t so verbose either. You had picked up on the flirty remarks and little gestures that Tony did whenever you were around, that hopelessly romantic part of your heart somewhere knew it would happen.

“See I had a whole thing planned about telling you but I don’t know what came over me tonight, maybe it’s the ocean air or whatever. I couldn’t help—”

You silenced his rambling with a kiss that successfully drowned his insecurities. You grinned against his lips when you felt him instantly relax under your touch, like a breath he’d been holding in for a long time. Feeling his heart beating under your palm, you lost yourself into the kiss as Tony pulled you closer, not wanting to let you go just yet.

“Definitely just the ocean air.”

I could write this better, elaborate it more! Time constraints!! I’m sorry. Thank you for this ask though, it stirred something in me :)