#another long ass thing
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this project is gonna be the death of me it is never ending but I’m locking in we ball
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#long awaited update#hit a rough ass patch in recovery from my Many Things#feeling good for the first time since August tho#fingers crossed i AM recovering fr but time will tell in several months when it’s time to face the unspeakable terrors again#ah well worst come to worse I’ll have another wild tale to accompany the next batch of brain damage I get dealt by god#cosplay#soulsborne#bloodborne#ludwig the accursed#fromsoftware#ludwig the holy blade#horror#monster#fromsoft#dark souls#bloodborne cosplay#puppetry#practical effects
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NO BECAUSE I DON'T THINK WE TALK ABOUT THIS ENOUGH WE DON'T TALK ABOUT THIS ENOUGH CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS? BECAUSE
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Yeah okay that's a pretty terrifying thing to see, and I can pretty logically assume this is hallucination on N's part, but does that stop him from literally CATCHING HER IN THE NEXT THREE SECONDS???
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NO THE FUCK IT DOES NOT LOOK AT HIS HAND LOOK AT HIS HAND UNDERNEATH HER HEAD LOOK AT IT
CAN WE ALSO TALK ABOUT THE CHANGE IN EXPRESSION THAT I CAN ONLY ASSUME IS DUE TO WHAT HE SAW?? Like also I assume yeah obviously he's worried about Uzi because who the fuck wouldn't be (Cyn) but like LOOK AT THIS BULLSHIT
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HIS EYES DON'T HOLLOW OUT UNTIL SHE NEARLY HITS THE GROUND AFTER THAT WHOLE THING OCCURS AND YOU CAN SEE THE FUCKING SWITCH FROM "Oh my fucking god what the hell is happening" TO "BEEP BEEP BEEP RED ALERT SHIT'S GOING DOWN OH BISCUITS OH FUCK"
"Myrah what the fuck are you on about it's 8:30 in the damn morning?"
I AM UNWELL ABOUT THESE TWO GODDAMNIT
#AND I GIVE 0 FUCKS ABOUT WHO KNOWS#OR WHAT THE FUCK TIME IT IS#GOD THESE TWO MAKE ME SICK THEY MAKE ME ILL /POS#I need to write a very very long post about them very soon#another thing to add to the list of long ass posts I have to make... sigh...#yeah J enjoyers I'm coming for your ass#I have an analysis to perform and no I will NOT wait for permission#and FUCK YOU for expecting me to#(i know no one was expecting me to)#anyway#murder drones#md#glitch productions#glitch#uzi doorman#serial designation n#nuzi#biscuit bites#n x uzi#uzi x n#mymy rambles
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One of my favorite things about Psych is how when they establish a character fact, they stick with it.
Have I at all heard that Gus did tap before the Episode Where He Does Tap? No! But it's brought up/he does tap in several episodes afterwards!!! (Tap-Man and the Seabirds comes to mind)
Did Juliet have a brother before Ewan "JOOOOOHN CEEEEENAAAAA" O'Hara appeared? Not really, although they DID say she had a large (at least extended) family. And they bring him up afterwards!! (Obviously the Bourne episode but also her dad mentions her "and the boys" growing up with Lloyd)
Did Shawn know what Phineas and Ferb was before it was referenced?? Who knows!! But now he's watching their marathons!!
And like!! We love that!! I can't super think of any other examples but there's something so refreshing and comforting to have details that for any other show would've been one-offs never to be brought up again instead become a more nuanced part of the character as a whole!!!
#edit: NOT TO ADD IN ANOTHER THING. BUT I JUST REMEMBERED THAT THEY MENTION THE EP1 DETECTIVE SEVERAL TIMES!!!!#obviously psych isn't perfect#I'm sure there are some details and plotholes in season one or somewhere else that don't get ironed out#but!!!#BUT STILL!!!!#I love psych your honor#just yelling into the void#psych 2006#burton guster#ewan o'hara#juliet o'hara#shawn spencer#I feel like I'm going feral#is this good writing? is this what a good show is?#I feel like I've been living off a steady diet of spn and spn-lite with only avatar as the pinnacle of shows#(it is but with only one example and it's literally peak writing I feel like I haven't actually watched a well-written show in ages)#shows I've liked? sure! shows with heart? certainly!#but good shows??? consistently well-written. long-ass. funny. heartfelt. good shows???#chat am I crazy or is psych actually a wonderful show with good (even if sometimes dated) writing???#(I am still not over John Cena playing Ewan O'Hara I'm sorry)
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regarding dr ratio's team join voiceline with aventurine
idk where it originated from but i've been seeing this notion that the ENG voiceline is horribly mistranslated and ratio is much more caring and friendly in the original CN. THIS IS LITERALLY NOT TRUE HE IS JUST AS BITCHY IN BOTH LANGUAGES
as a native chinese speaker i actually really love hsr's localisation and i would like to clarify the misconception + explain the cultural nuance/context behind this particular voiceline
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i think this tweet might've been the original source for this misconception? op's translation of the CN line is very literal and completely lacking in cultural nuance. while the sentence 管好你自己 does literally translate to "take care of yourself", it lacks the automatic positive connotation that this sentence has in ENG. CN is a high context language -- aka the meaning of a sentence can be totally different based on context clues like tone, body language, etc.
ratio's tone in this line is not the tone of someone who is concerned for a friend. it's standoffish. when said in this kind of tone, the meaning of 管好你自己 is closer to "mind your own business", making the ENG "keep to yourself" a more accurate localisation.
in addition, the word 管 has connotations of controlling/managing something -- directly translating this to "take care of yourself" means it's missing a lot of important nuance.
granted, the second half of the line is a bit unnecessarily aggressive in ENG. the CN is more like "I have no need for your concern", and explicitly saying that he believes aven's concern to be "false" in ENG is definitely a lot ruder than the original line.
However. in my opinion it's not Too far off base. the way he emphasises the second half of that voiceline in CN carries an implication that he actually disdains aven's concern; we can extrapolate from context clues that he feels this way because aven's concern is just an act. tldr; eng line explicitly saying "false display" does make it ruder than CN but it didn't just come from nowhere -- the implication is already there in CN
this is not to say that ratio doesn't care about aven or see him as a friend. imo the reason ratio is so standoffish in this line is because any display of concern from aven here has the clear intention of teasing ratio. they both know ratio can take care of himself perfectly well. this is just how their dynamic works -- aven makes silly playful comments and ratio deflects them by acting cold.
in conclusion: ENG voiceline is not a mistranslation. hsr localisation is definitely not perfect but in this particular case i feel they've done a fairly good job of conveying the original meaning. thank you for coming to my ted talk
#SORRY FOR THE LONG ASS POST#Im just passionate about accurate localisation#if you read the whole thing thank you seriously#if anyone has other thoughts or questions please feel free to share under this post or in my inbox or wherever!#i did cross check all this with another native speaker but im open to hearing other ppl's interpretations too#dr ratio#aventurine#aventio#ratiorine#not necessarily ship but ill tag anyway#honkai star rail#hsr#long post
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We all already know Mizu and Akemi are narrative foils. But you know what? Lemme just say it, here's what I think:
Taigen and Mikio are foils.
Not necessarily to each other as individuals in the way that Mizu and Akemi juxtapose each other, but mostly in the contrast between their relationships with Mizu.
I've covered specific parallels between Taigen and Mikio in other posts I wrote; but as the number of parallels I'm noticing between them keeps piling up, I'm compelled to just compile them all in one post. So! This is, thus, the post in question.
First of all, let's look at their similarities.
1. Their status in society is the same. They are both samurai who lost their honour and have dreams of reclaiming it.
2. They are also both diligent as they strive to achieve this goal, they both care deeply about their work, but here as they begin to contrast, as the work in question and way they go about their goals is different:
For Mikio, his work is in taming and rearing horses; in order to prove himself, he must tame Kai—a willful and strong horse—and present it to his lord. For Taigen, his work is in sword fighting and martial arts; in order to prove himself, he must kill Mizu—a willful and strong swordsman—and present her dead body to his lord.
In the parallel above, not only are Taigen and Mikio contrasting each other, but Mizu and Kai are placed in comparison as well. And of course, Kai is Mizu's horse, and represents her. Which is why, when later, Mikio sells Kai off, it represents the way he is tossing Mizu (and their relationship) aside.
From there, the rest of the details of their character begin to contrast and juxtapose each other more clearly. So let's look at those differences, shall we?
Their backstory:
Mikio was a great samurai who was banished. A somebody to a nobody. Taigen was a fisherman’s son who rose to the top. A nobody to a somebody.
2. The first time we meet them on-screen:
Mikio is an adult. An older man. Mizu's superior in age. He is Mizu's to-be husband. A love interest. Taigen is a child. A young boy. Mizu's peer in age. He is Mizu's bully. An antagonist.
3. Their maturity and growth:
Mikio is mature, but stuck in his ways. Taigen is immature, but capable of changing and learning.
4. Their overall attitude:
Mikio is generally relaxed, easy-going and unfussy. Taigen is uptight, irritable and severe.
5. How they talk to and conduct themselves around Mizu:
Mikio is aloof, soft-spoken, and serious. Taigen is obnoxious, brash, and sarcastic. Mikio is quiet, speaking only when spoken to, even when Mizu turns to smile at him and shows openness to be near him. Taigen is loud, talking while others are silent, even when Mizu turns from him and shows no interest in conversing with him.
Mikio doesn't show much of who he is to Mizu throughout their marriage, despite their growing affection. Taigen openly shares his traumas and life story to Mizu during their brief alliance, despite their mutual antagonism.
6. Their external vs internal selves:
Mikio is calm, gentle, and considerate on the outside. Taigen is hot-headed, rude, and selfish on the outside. Mikio is cowardly and deceitful on the inside. Taigen is brave and loyal to a fault on the inside. Mikio tells Mizu that he wants to know and see all of her. But he scorns and betrays her, the woman he loves. Taigen tells Mizu that he wants to duel and kill him. But he endures torture to not betray him, the man he hates.
9. Their hair, a symbol of their honour:
Mikio's topknot is untied by Mizu during their spar. This humiliation occurs in private, the two of them alone in a rural location where no one can see them. Taigen's topknot is cut off by Mizu during their duel. This humiliation occurs in public, the two of them being watched by many others in the Shindo Dojo.
10. Their power dynamic with Mizu:
Mikio believes he is Mizu's mentor. He teaches her to throw knives, how to ride and care for horses, and about the tactical benefits of using a naginata. Taigen believes he is Mizu's equal. He views Mizu as a samurai like himself who received all the same teachings he did, and who possesses the same values.
11. Their perceptions of Mizu:
Mikio sees Mizu's feminine side first. He sees her as sweet and gentle, but also clumsy and incompetent. Taigen sees Mizu's masculine side first. He sees her as terrifying and deadly, but also strong and skilled.
12. The way they approach sparring with Mizu:
Mikio only spars with Mizu once. As the fight progresses and she is beating him, he tries to put a stop to it. When she teases/provokes him, he starts taking the fight personally and seriously, finding no enjoyment in it. Taigen spars and brawls with Mizu all the time. No matter how many times Mizu beats him, he doesn't back down. When Mizu challenges him with a chopstick, he is eager to compete with her and gladly rises up to the challenge.
Mikio and Mizu's one and only spar is a friendly match; Mizu is smiling and having fun while he grows increasingly frustrated. Taigen and Mizu's last-seen spar is a playful wrestling match; both him and Mizu are having fun and laughing.
Mikio cannot deal with Mizu being better than him, so he scorns her and walks off, avoiding her thereafter. When Taigen cannot deal with Mizu being better than him, he follows her to observe her moves and continues training in hopes to eventually beat her. After being bested by Mizu once, Mikio leaves her and sells the horse he'd previously gifted to her. After many times losing to Mizu and fighting alongside her, Taigen commends her and admits she is better than him.
13. When Mizu pins them down in a friendly spar:
Mikio sees Mizu's whole face objectively. Taigen stares at Mizu's mouth and eyes.
Mikio gets angry when she kisses him, throwing her off of him and snapping at her, calling her a monster. Taigen gets aroused, apologising, so she pulls herself off of him.
14. Mizu's blue meteorite sword is a reflection of her soul. She believes most are undeserving to face it, let alone hold it. And on that note:
Mikio is the first person (chronologically) that Mizu fights against using her sword. Taigen is the first person (we see on-screen) that Mizu fights against with her sword. Mikio is the first person (chronologically) to ever hold her sword, as she passes it to him, letting him wield it. Taigen is the first person (we see on-screen) to ever hold her sword, as she passes out, and he picks it up and carries it for her.
15. Then, last but not least, in Fowler's fortress, when she is drugged and in pain, she hears Ringo's voice in the dungeon. She then follows it to an open cell:
Mizu first sees Mikio as a hallucination, the sight of him haunting her and causing her to lose her grip on reality. Her eyes glow a surreal blue to represent this. Her Mama appears then and says Mizu's name accusingly.
Mizu then sees Taigen, but he is real, the sight of him a relief and grounding her back to reality. Her eyes return to their normal blue colour to represent this. Taigen looks at Mizu weakly and says her name softly.
Then, later, when facing Fowler, her revenge awaiting her, she instead chooses to follow her conscience (represented by Ringo's voice in her mind), putting aside her vengeance for a time, in order to save Taigen.
So that's basically all the ones I've noticed so far, but even then, I feel there's already so much that forms a contrast between these two.
What makes it especially incredible about these juxtapositions is that Mikio was Mizu's husband, the man she had fallen in love with, the one person she had ever been intimate with, the man who made her begin to accept herself, to put down her desire for vengeance and instead live a life of peace and happiness.
So for Taigen to have so many parallels with him... Do you see what I'm saying here!
Not to mention that Mizu clearly already has some burgeoning attraction to him, as indicated by how she thinks of him when asked about her desires. And Taigen clearly has shown interest as well (see: him getting a boner after their spar, him holding her hand and telling her, "We're not done yet.").
And on the topic of speculating future possibilities of this relationship, this post by @stromblessed has pointed out yet another parallel between Taigen and Mikio:
Mizu promises Taigen to meet him for their duel in autumn. Mizu fell in love with Mikio and duelled him during autumn.
With all that said, I do believe Mizu and Taigen's relationship is definitely hurtling towards something. But whether they will actually end up together in a sustainable relationship and have a happily ever after? Well, that is a whole other story; we'll just have to wait and see.
#blue eye samurai#mizu x taigen#taigen x mizu#taimizu#taigen blue eye samurai#blue eye samurai meta#hope yall enjoy my thesis on virgin mikio vs chad taigen#this was written last night when i shouldve been writing the new chapter for my taimizu fic that i promised i would work on....whoopsies...#i will get to it eventually but i just have to get a firmer grip on characterisation before i can delve further into it yk#on that note. i kiiinda regret posting the fic on a whim!#my last longfic was written better because i had the whole thing complete and could go back and edit/polish/revise before posting#so it came out much more coherent and consistent ykwim?#this fic might suffer a bit for this reason 🤒#but its fine i have to remind myself im just doing it for funsies#anyway here have another long ass meta post from yours truly#meta dissertations.pdf#shut up haydar#fandom.rtf
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do you guys think Thedas has the Sweater Curse and if so how long does it take for Lucanis to brave it and knit Rook a sweater anyway
#for those not into fiber arts#Sweater Curse is that if you spend the hours and hours and hours to knit a sweater for someone they will then break up with you soon after#realistically this is just bc knitting takes a long ass time for things that big and so gives plenty of time for a relationship to go wrong#but i know several knitters who swore not to make sweaters for anyone until married to avoid the curse#ramblings#lucanis#lucanis dellamorte#rook x lucanis#rookanis#another night of being soooo normal. normal thoughts only about lucanis over here#dragon age: veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard#jade plays dav#lucanisposting#juniper x lucanis
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remember null? well after lore progression and violence he regained his true self now
say hi to narrow (or, nicknamed by hana, anguria which means watermelon in italian)
lore rambling in the tags because i'm not assed to write it here
#tenka willow#my sona#oc:narrow#my ocs#my art#i never said it here cus i have null's lore only written in my art fight but in VERY short words#null was basically a chimera made by anemone out of the cast-away guardian Narrow and willow#whose purpose was to eradicate a whole species in the realm whom both willow and anemone despise#anemone inserted a chip into null's body so that he ONLY focused on eradicating that species#because it was the destiny himawari gave to willow. even tho that was basically genocide#so hana and a few others worked together to try to beat anemone's ass (and failed)#however anemone told them the placement of the chip after his ass being kicked a bit#then after that they beat null's ass. and got the chip out. and he regained his true self. YAY!!!!!!!!!#now they're probably gonna be on a quest to find narrow's actual body.............#which is cast away for thousands of years in another planet#being dormant. for so long. so basically narrow is an old man#his actual form is supposed to be a salamander-fish thing i guess#anyways um this is explained very briefly and vague if you have more questions do ask#i literally don't post about lore shit here ever 😭😭i have so much worldbuilding i didn't tell anyone but my brother
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Genuinely so curious who Mike thinks is gonna be buying The Cage or the new DCTL GN bc with the way he tweets as far as he's concerned, it's not gonna be:
The queer people he has actively admitted he will never show any representation of in the games.
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2. The POC he has actively fought against representing in his franchise. [Who he also mocked for thinking they would be represented in his franchise]
3. The Bendy fandom which has always been concerned with topics of diversity esp in the sense of queer people since its creation. Who he has responded to really poorly esp in regards to the GN.
4. The fans who critique him. [He blocked me for doing so lol]
5. His fans in general who he tweets about like this currently. [He's being vague about why people were mad at him or sent him 'nasty messages' because if you actually looked into why you'd see he was in the wrong. Either way, a very hateful way to speak abt ur own fanbase.]
Reminder while Mike is trash talking his fans he has always treated them rather poorly. The fans who won the fanart contest for Chapter 5 never got their posters actually in game due to it being rushed. Not only was chapter 5 a big slap to the face story wise, but it was literally so rushed he couldn't be bothered to add in the art his fans gave him for his game FOR FREE. [Meatly blames this on a crazy timeline, reminder him and Mike are the literal ceos of this company. The proposal of future updates here is also pretty cruel considering Mike nowadays happily admits he corrupted Chapter 5's source code and therefore literally can't update it At All currently. Because he is a moron]
At least they got to be in Boris and the dark survival, and by that I mean that was the Only game they got to be in so far, isn't that just treating your fans like you love them? Shoving their hard work into a spin off game almost nobody has played or addresses much. [Hell, who knows if with the Lone Wolf rebrand they'll even stay there. In which case they'll be in None of the games, only in the credits of BATIM]
6. The Bendy fans who just generally disagree with him on stuff. Like the new ink demon design where there is literally a public poll showing people generally prefer the old one.
7. The Bendy fans who can see he is actively lying to them. To their fucking faces.
He says this has always been the case, but screenshots and links to tweets regarding the books being canon prove it was not. Does he really think bendy fans are stupid or something? [Unless he's admitting here he lied to Kress when he told her the books were canon which sounds worse!]
8. Anyone who doesn't like the idea of giving money to a guy who laid off tons of employees then afterwards thought it was a great idea to express his anti-union views! Also brag about how good of an employer he was, according to his employees, he was not!
So in summary; Mike is an awful person who has not learned anything from the awful things he did. I will not be purchasing The Cage because, combined with this and his absolute refusal to take any kind of critique or see any differing interpretation of his franchise, I have no reason to think my problems with the franchise will ever be addressed or fixed. I probably will pirate The Cage along with any future Bendy Products [Including the movie] and will do my best to avoid giving it any kind of monetary support. Unless this changes any time soon, I can't see myself making anymore positive Bendy posts soon.
Mike has just managed to make it so hard to speak positively or optimistically of this franchise when he's so willing to broadcast how little he cares about it or its fans. I'm at the point where I refuse to pull any of my punches with my problems with it. What's the point of trying to play nice with my critique when either way the people creating it don't care?
So with this post, I want to invite anyone who feels similarly about the franchise to tell me, make a post or send an ask talking about how all of this makes you feel. It may not change how things are, but genuinely seeing other people share my feelings of anger makes me feel better. It feels nice to see when other people share our same concerns and worries. I'd also love to know if anyone else thinks they'll be avoiding purchasing Bendy products over this.
I'm not forcing anyone to participate in it nor trying to say anyone who doesn't supports mike but genuinely maybe if we can collectively decide to boycott things like the movie, graphic novel and The Cage... It might at least make the bendy devs acknowledge how much they have destroyed their own fandom's faith and trust in them.
The way Mike tweets about his actions like he had no control over why people were mad at him at least proves to me he takes NONE of it back nor regrets it. If you didn't know about his actions and only went off his tweets, you would be led to believe Mike has been needlessly picked apart by fans over things he couldn't control [or in his own words, had his words twisted and taken out of context]. That is not how you speak about your actions if you have actually learned better from them.
anyway, that has been my bendy dev callout post. This is an open invitation to anyone feeling similarly upset about the way the franchise is going to talk about it. It's genuinely nice to see how people feel about this and the more we talk about the more it's likely the bendy devs are forced to address our concerns. I don't think they will but hey, that's why I'm not gonna support them with my money anymore nor am I gonna be nice to them in any content I make critiquing Bendy. I mean I'm also basically making this post just in case anyone asks me Why I feel this way towards to bendy devs/as a way to respond to anyone who thinks I am too harsh in my critique in the future.
As always, it seems the best part of Bendy isn't actually anything about canon but about what the fan's are creating with the ideas Bendy failed to do anything interesting with.
Also the books, the books slap.
#batim#batdr#bendy and the ink machine#bendy and the dark revival#ramblez#bendy and the silent city#bendy the cage#for the record another reason Im making this post is bc some of the only good resources to learn abt why the bendy devs suck are some old#very longer videos and this is a very long post but I thought it was important to document the recent shit theyve been doing alongside some#of the worst past things theyve done bc Mike has been trying to misinform people on what happened but those videos are still great resource#if you want more info n such#long post#mike D#for anyone who doesnt wanna hear abt him since he doesnt go by mood anymore#sorry if this is rambley or emotional Im just so sick of these guys fr dskjhgskdfjghskdjhgkjhsd#I miss when I didnt spend my days stressed about the awful shit mike is gonna say next and how I would have to disprove it in a post later#or explain why its bad to have a cast of nothing but cishet white guys n constantly fight back against any push for diversity in said cast#genuinely its just tiring esp when u see other bendy fans give ignorant or very silly defenses/takes on those things#n then u lose a lot of respect for them bc they are speaking on stuff they dont know much abt so confidently and therefore misinforming#people or even encouraging very bad views on stuff like diversity n its importance#Im not saying people like that are bad people but it is stressful n upsetting when u see someone u thought knew better do that sort of thin#it makes it hard to trust them again on other issues bc u now dont trust they know what they r talking abt!!#like please think twice before telling young artists making norman white was a tough and complicated decision it was fucking not the bendy#devs just think all their humans are white by default and dont wanna change that its been proven time n time again thats all it is#and defending them just bc u like a franchise they made is very very bad!! They are not ur friends!! they suck and we seriously need to#stop pretending they dont!! toxic positivity is only gonna make the fandom an absolute nightmare its not gonna make ANYTHING better#it just means people will be forced to PRETEND they never have negative thoughts abt the franchise n therefore make them burned out#just look at other similar fandoms please lets not make those same mistakes!!#sorry can u tell Ive been having just. A time recently#anyways back to making my queer ass bendy fan game full of so much diversity mike will prolly shit when he sees it DKFJGHKSDJHGKJHSD
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OH YEA BTW BTW. I got caught up in another fixation so I didn't comment about this the day-of or when I watched it but. The Lunar's apology video!!
And frankly? I don't see anything wrong with this episode actually! This looks really promising and there's even acknowledgments of topics I wasn't sure they'd ever bring up on the show. I still hold a lot of feelings on past episode leading to this point, but I think am overall wildly relieved that this was where we ended up. Lunar could have easily forfeited everything out of shame and stayed in that dingy apartment, not ready to take their mental bandages off yet and start the process of disinfecting the wounds.
But they swallowed their pride and not only initiated the conversation but also admitted they were wrong!! They were just dripping with vulnerability in this episode and ghod don't I know that takes a lot. I must confess I am also terribly excited for their conversation with Eclipse because I feel like, this time around, it will actually be more of a conversation instead of... Lunar talking at Eclipse about how they're not scared of him anymore while Eclipse tries to rile them up.
Because Eclipse is at a place where he has actually changed for the better and because Lunar is at a place where masking doesn't do them good anymore, I feel like they will actually have to both contribute time the conversation instead of it just being like it was last time. I am,,, very hopeful for whatever happens in it, to be quite honest HSJABD
I'll also add that honestly, most of my worries stem from just,,, wondering how this is going to be moving forward. Like, in a more meta sense. Earth had acknowledged that trauma takes a long time to heal, but I worry that process may be sped up for the sake of videos. Not to mention, Earth honestly has every right to be upset at Lunar, like, forever tbh. They did something that is going to affect her for the rest of her life. I'm worried this is gunna be, like,,, a wedge between them for good.
I actually have a lot of thoughts abt how things were and are and will be around this but uhm I have talked so much longer than I intended to so that's all for now. Overall, happy with this direction!!
#xero says things#honestly. if y'all would allow me to be a lil personal in the tags right quick#figuring out what feels off bc smth is actually wrong vs what feels off bc i relate to lunar rlly hard and am getting secondhand—#—vulnerability feelings is. oftentimes /very/ hard for me HSJANSM#so watching this made me ache. it make me feel directed-at in a way that made me feel a bit like a trapped pray animal#but putting my own messiness aside. i don't think there's anything /wrong/#like. this is an important moment for lunar for sure. the fact they even brought themselves to the family's house is /super/ impressive—#—to me bc. as someone with similar issues#my ass genuinely would have just assumed i was exiled for life. i would have been far too scared to cross another line#so the fact they made that step is. /huge/#I STILL HAVE SOME QUALMS. and a lot of my previous sentiments still ring true. but i am overall pleased.#lunar and earth show#the lunar and earth show#tlaes#laes#laes spoilers#tlaes spoilers#long post#xero thoughts and rambles
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realized i painted half the environments on the first pages of chapter two in the wrong color and it kinda deflated the determination i had to push myself to get the first comic update out asap :/
#ganondoodles talks#i am so good at digging my own graves of creative failure#i can probably play with color correction but its not gonna look organic#idk i can always see that a thing wasnt painting that way in the first place bc it just doesnt fit right#(havent been able to work on anything for the past few days bc my lil brother was here and i just wanted to spend time with him)#(dont see him very often :( played the new mario party together until i couldnt stay awake anymore lol)#i am extremely caught between writing totk rant and concept art for the rewrite and ... comic stuff#i feel like the longer i dont get either done the less its gonna be worth it#and i keep flip flopping back and forth (and with depression artblock kicking my ass too) without getting anywhere#im guessing its gonna go on for so long it will either be far too little relevant anymore or my brain loses its fixation on it#i dont want it all to be yet another ambitious and forever unfinished project ...............#but i cant ever finish anything so i supposed my worry and struggle with all that is in vain anyway
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k2 is such a funny ship to me, like it's just plausible enough to be kinda sorta realistic if you squint and pray and look at it sideways, not quite a crackship but not able to get off the ground as more than a particularly popular rarepair either. they had, like, one big episode together back in season 3, a handful of major moments over the years that people hold onto with an iron grip, and basically nothing else outside of a plethora of fantastic fancontent and dreams.
i think i like it for the exact opposite reasons that i like kyman, actually, they sorta stand as complementary ships in my mind. where k2 barely has any actual basis in canon & comes heavily from fanworks and speculation about how well the characters would match each other, kyman is practically canonical, at least when it comes to cartman's feelings, and is at least regularly joked about and referenced in-show. personally, i also tend to see k2 as a ship that is kinda miraculously requited, whereas kyman is usually stuck in unrequited hell, which...
...well, this gets into more specific character analysis, but a big part of this is that i tend to see cartman as having very fucked up views of both romance & sexuality that have especially interesting implications when you consider him to have a crush on kyle, specifically.
on the one hand, i think his cupid self is evidence enough that he has a very fairytale, idealized view of romance, based more out of the hollywood movie image of what love is supposed to be rather than anything in reality. south park adults being utter fucking idiots 99% of the time means that most, if not all, of the kids don't have a lot of good role models to base their actions off of. i'm not gonna talk out of my ass about childhood development more than i understand it, but i don't think it's too controversial (?) of a take to claim that kids understand & learn about the world through watching it just as much as interacting with it, particularly when it comes to their own parents.
cartman is a piece of shit, and while a lot of that comes from him and his own bigotry, he's still ultimately a kid in show and you can trace where some of his worst traits originate from in the people around him, even if he makes the personal decision to push it as much as humanly possible. i think the trend in recent seasons for many adults to try and at least appear more pc only makes this more obvious, actually (coughcoughrandy), though talking about that is maybe biting off a little more south park politics than i'm willing to chew for this particular post.
point is, cartman as a character in particular does not have a lot, if anything, to base his idea of what a healthy, happy romantic relationship looks like, which isn't only because liane is single though that may be a major contributing factor. love isn't work to cartman, it isn't about the maintenance of a relationship or communication or all the more realistic and slightly less pleasant parts of loving someone that hollywood doesn't find dramatic or interesting enough to show. rather it's a fantasy, something that happens to people that they have no real control over. i wouldn't be surprised if he believes in soulmates or love at first sight, even if the likelihood of him admitting that out loud isn't especially high.
on the other hand, i think his view of sexuality is greatly influenced by not just liane's sex work, but the way she is slut-shamed and treated like garbage by the rest of the town for it. i tend to view cartman as having a very transactional, cynical view of sex and sexuality, where sex is only used for personal gain (whether that be money or power, likely at the expense of someone else/the submissive party), and sexuality is an inherent character flaw, a weakness that must be overcome unless you are able to twist it and use it for your own (material?) benefit- see the streaming wars & cartman wanting his mom to seduce a rich man for money as a recent example of this.
it's a running gag in TFBW that cartman uses douchebag catching their dad fucking their mom as a tragic backstory, and doesn't seem to understand how reproduction actually works even when kyle basically says it straight to his fucking face. even as a joke, there's still a lot of underlying truth behind why he would believe this. cartman is aware of his mom's sex work, even if he may not want to fully admit/believe it, largely because of situations where he's specifically getting shit for it. he knows he has a father, and that he is (in)directly responsible for said father's horrible death & consumption, but he only really cares about that insofar as it means he's half ginger. sex has only ever been presented through its most vicious power dynamics to him- why would he see it as a good thing, as something that could ever be loving, especially when contrasted against such an idealized, purified view of romance?
(you could also extrapolate from this how cartman associates sexuality & romance with femininity & his brand of sexism to get some particularly delectable transfem cartman ideas, but i digress.)
ANYWAYS. this is all to say that cartman having a crush on kyle (or anyone, really, but kyle is obviously the most emotionally volatile example) instantly pits those two conflicting views against one another, like he wants something that he doesn't even think could ever exist: a happy, healthy romantic relationship, where sex is just a normal thing that they can choose to do or not. this is where a lot of kyman angst comes from for me, with cartman either trying to stuff that round desire back into the square hole of how he views the world, or having his ideals fall ever further apart when the feelings are unrequited. and, on top of that, none of this being actually said out loud because communication is impossible.
this is why i always see kyman as making each other worse, especially if they actually manage to make it into a romantic relationship. i simply Do Not see kyle being a patient enough person to help cartman work through the intricacies of all of his expectations and idealized fantasies and internalized fears surrounding such mutually screwed views of romance & sexuality- on the rare occasions that kyle does show some interest in romantic relationships it's usually pretty centered around himself, and to be frank i only see his interest in romance going down as he gets older.
i've heard some people talk about kyle before like he's the "moral compass" of south park or whatever and while that may be true by the end of the episode, one of the things i like most about him is the fact that he struggles so much to get to the best conclusions. this is kind of getting back into the k2 side of this analysis, but where kenny manages a much more effortless selflessness, even pushing it to the point of being both a strength and a flaw when kenny stops caring about himself for the sake of others, kyle is a lot more self-centered than he cares to admit and it influences a lot of his attempts at being a good person.
this is both my favorite aspect of kyle, that he really has to put in the work to be the good person that he wants to be, and also the primary bad trait that i think cartman brings out of kyle. by being such a notoriously horrible shithead, he gives kyle the perfect target to unleash his annoyance on, getting him so caught up in arguing and proving himself to be the better person that kyle forgets to actually listen to the people that he's supposed to be standing up for. cartman is a fantastic troll and, at least in show, kyle definitely has not learned to stop feeding him argument fodder yet.
sidenote: about kyman entering a romantic relationship... wasn't sure where to add this, but it's for this exact reason that i also see kyman (or this version of kyman where cartman gets worse with age, rather than better) only actually happening in the universes where kyle has lost all other meaningful connections, to the point that feeding a troll to get off on an argument is the best possible option, even if he's old enough to know better. especially if he's old enough to know better.
again, k2 is the opposite of this for me in that i see kyle & kenny as having a lot of potential to bring out the best in each other.
if kyle's worst trait is that he gets too caught up in his own feelings & desires to truly be the good, selfless, thoughtful person that he wants to be to actually do genuine good for the sake of others, kenny's problem is that he skews too far in the opposite direction. i kinda already said this, but to state it outright: kenny's biggest strength and his biggest flaw are the exact same, that he is selfless to a fault, to the point of consistently putting other people's safety and happiness above his own when he thinks it would be of help the majority/the people he loves. this was the key kenny trait that was established by the end of BL&U, and it has only gotten more prominent in the years since with his mysterion persona.
it is in this way that kenny both stands as someone that kyle can look up to & admire for how effortlessly he dedicates himself to the people he cares about the most, but also, simultaneously, as someone that kyle can take care of himself and offer the same help back to. and i don't even think kenny needs to say very much out loud to push kyle towards a lot of these conclusions, he kinda just has to exist and be noticed and kyle has the intelligence to figure it out himself, to recognize the shit that kenny puts himself through and his (usually) quite noble reasons for doing so, and want to offer him the same love and care and dedication that kenny never allows himself to have.
really, the difficult part of this is being noticed at all in the first place. again, i said earlier that k2 is kinda "miraculously requited," in my mind, specifically because the aspect that's missing in the show and almost always must be provided by fan content for k2 is that spark/push forward that gets them close enough to start talking and for kyle to notice kenny in the first place. it's just lucky that's one of my favorite things to figure out and write for those two, hehehe.
#sp k2#kyman#super long post#tangerina talks#a very casual (long ass) analysis essay but i enjoyed writing this#ik some people like writing a version of cartman that grows in maturity & gets better as he gets older#and that's definitely valid#i just like writing him better when he gets worse LMFAO#this isn't pro-k2 and anti-kyman btw i genuinely really like both ships a lot#this is just my attempt to explore how i see them as opposites#and also figure out what specifically is the most appealing about either ship to me#cxtangerina#fun fact i think the actual most unhealthy relationship would be twyle but that's an argument for another essay ;w;#also no mention of style because. reasons#this shit is long enough i need to write more south park analysis but let's see how people react to this thing first
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After @yannig mentioned that there was a sequel to the Blooming Flowers, Silent Sorrow (MYATB novel) that features Siming and Jinbao, I had to investigate.
The sequel is called Jinbao Marries a Wife and is being translated here. I haven't started reading, so I don't know if it's getting a proper translation or it's MTL, but from what I can tell from a preliminary skim, it doesn't look like a copy and paste G translate job.
Until we can manifest a live action sequel into existence, this will have to do.
#siming is the wife?#lolol#another thing to add to my already long ass reading queue 😭#blooming flowers silent sorrow#jinbao marries a wife#meet you at the blossom#siming x jinbao
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mental illness hitting hard tonite but we ball !! they r so cute i couldnt not draw them despite knowing nothing abt strawberry shortcake lmao
designs by @qevillous go check them out or else (i am holding a confetti gun to your head)
#splatoon#coroika#my art#digital art#aloha coroika#army coroika#the fits are so them too i love them#army in a little skirt thing.....#and aloha with those long ass baggy sleeves#same w army but#AUFHG taking critical damage i need to study them under a microscope#wish i couldve drawn the skirt but by the time i had sketchy stuff down i couldnt be bothered repositioning#they r so. grrrhgah#lowkey wanna draw the rest of them but wow am i stacked with things rn#at least it feels like it#maybe tho#maybe another midnight art tangent will lead to the rest of them#i rlly love masks fit.....#IM GETTING DISTRACTED AGAIN RAAAH throws the art at u and runs
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god im legit so mentally tired idk what to do
#mm another thing too but like#i think it might take me a long long while to reblog any posts at all#replying to ppl i can do#but i dont want to feel like it a requirement and force myself to do it even if i genuinely do like ppl's post#its more so ill leave it there until i get enough mental energy to reblog them and add my thoughts#cause i am passionate in tagging and i dont wanna half assed or make the tags short and make ppl feel like i dont care abt their posts...#auagahah#yea i might just take a break from that#but ill still be replying cause it take less energy eee#.txt
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how do i tell my roommate that her cat repeatedly pissing on and destroying my things is something that people usually offer to clean or replace or apologize for instead of shrugging off
#there's always garbage scattered along the floor she has a million shoes that somehow end up under my bed#she fucking leaves her cat alone for days and days bc 'if he gets hungry he'll rip open the cat food bag' ?????#her cat killed one of her turtles bc of their shitty housing and the other one's visibly terrified to bask in the fucking#led light that gives off no heat that i TOLD her was wrong and unhealthy months ago#she never cleans said turtle's tank even though the algae bloom is currently insane#her shit takes up like 80% of the room for exactly zero reason#and i cant use my closet because rascal pissed in it over the month long break and she did nothing about it#meaning the whole closet smells so much like piss that any clothes that stay there will smell like piss#it's fucking filthy in here and she never cleans obviously but it also makes it harder for me to clean bc her shit's everywhere#can you please maybe just take some of the trash out before you go cheat on your boyfriend please#(<- at least im pretty sure that's what's going on? might be more of an open relationship)#your cat is fucking violent and filthy because you never hang out with him or clean anything#and next year i'll be gone (im Not living like this for another year) and someone else is going to put you into debt#charging you for the things your cat ruined or they're going to abuse him again and you don't even seem to care#bc you're too busy buying sorority merch and thinking about new tattoos and shit#i want broke ppl to have fun and to buy/do things that make them happy but her negligence literally has a body count now#bc she refuses to keep a turtle she's had for over a year in anything but shallow unprotected tupperware#a small glass tank isn't that expensive especially not compared to tattoos!! you Can save for this#and more importantly you Should have saved for this before getting a fucking living thing in your house#she kept her dead turtle rotting in our room for about three weeks. just. in a cup by the sink#and there's nowhere the cat can't reach so im terrified every time i leave that he's gonna piss on my mattress or something#that i'd be financially responsible for (or else that'd leave the poor inheriter of this room in filth) and couldn't really clean properly#and unfortunately i like talking to her so much and im so dogshit with confrontation that i never say anything#world's biggest sucker award!! fucking. christ on a cracker#like he's pissed on my SHOES. he's scratching up everything in here#and i don't want to pay outta my ass or spend a bunch of time trying to fix her cat for her#because contrary to popular belief i have shit to do!! i do not have the energy to have a cat That's Why I Don't Have One!!!!!#and i can't go to the RA bc she's not supposed to have any of these animals#if rascal gets taken from her chances are he's gonna get euthanized at our local shelter and i can't take him in bc of my dogs#but why doesn't she ever stop to think about how this might be affecting me?? my standards are not that high!!!!
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I couldn’t settle on one colour so this guy gets all of them
#sorry. it’s another robot in weird formal wear.#sorry it’s fucking blue and white again#i promise I can design things outside of this but I am!!!! stuck rn#art tag#oc tag#ned dex and this guy all wear shirt and ties#ned has more of a generic work attire whereas dex has whatever he has going on#an undershirt with. long sleeves that are also fingerless gloves. his shirt. his tie and then a cropped hoodie#then twenty ALSO wears a shirt. but his is under a regular hoodie that goes under a trench coat#naro and zero don’t wear formal wear#zero’s outfit doesn’t really need to be logical so idk what’s going on there#Naro’s outfit vaguely just looks like pjs#they’re not but I don’t know how else to describe that#and this guy wears a whole ass suit#anyway!!#his colour changing isn’t a voluntary thing#if he focuses REALLY hard he can change his colours#but usually it changes depending on a task he’s doing and he does it without notice#it IS also sometimes an emotional thing#but if it’s an intense emotion like sadness or anger they’ll just go grey more than anything
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