#another comic based on real life experience

[temeyes]

personal taste

[funkle420]

a great way to combat genAI in the future would be educating kids (and teens and college students and all ppl) on art way more.

[emthimofnight]

We have heights, we have voices....now we need a run down on the Siblings personality! Then the trilogy will be complete...and then I can (affectionately) release Stellar from my 6 star basement of adorableness.

HAHAHA OKAY!! I will do as you ask for the safe return of my baby girl 🙏

Void

Confident, calculating, and unnerving.

Rarely without a smile on his face.

Has the energy of an apex predator. Unflinchingly comfortable in spite of any danger, having never known what it feels like to be prey.

Strongest out of his siblings and the leader of their little trio.

Manipulative and power hungry.

His creators have no real control over him. They've created a monster.

Views life as a game and himself as the main character. Doesn't recognize other people as actual people, only as pawns for him to play with. If they don't play the game they way he likes, he breaks them.

Taller than both Sonic and Shadow. Doesn't view either of them as parents, only genetic donors.

He sees Shadow in particular as his prototype.

Only acknowledges other people as important if they have great power or something that he recognizes as stand-out.

Has never known defeat nor fear. Both of these things have the power to shatter his world view.

His siblings are afraid of him for good reason.

Who is to say what his sexuality is??? Probably power-sexual. 😂 He would only ever be attracted to someone based off of strength or what they could offer him.

Andromeda

Short-tempered, snide, and bitter.

A gloomy person over all, almost always in a perpetual state of scowling.

The emotional core of the failed experiment trio. Does her best to keep Void and Polarity from killing each other.

Deeply envious of Stellar and her happy relationship with Sonic and Shadow. Wonders why she wasn't found and whisked away to a better life.

Awful self-esteem. Knows she is unhappy with her life in Cosmic Labs, but doesn't see any way out. At least she has a place she belongs if she stays inside the box that was made for her.

Cares for both Void and Polarity, but doubts if Void returns that sentiment. She and Polarity are close, getting along well when they are alone.

Pressured by their creators to get Void to behave. Since they cannot punish him, Andromeda and Polarity are often punished in his stead.

Secretly craves love, affection, and praise. Despite this, she chooses to fight Stellar whenever they encounter one another instead of accepting her offerings of sisterhood.

If she had to pick between Void or Polarity, she'd pick Polarity.

She is a lesbian!

Polarity

Hot-headed, resentful, and explosive.

The weakest of the siblings (including Stellar) and he knows it. Only outdoes them in speed.

Has an extremely tumultuous relationship with Void. He is constantly trying to prove himself to their creators, but is outshone by his elder brother.

Despite this, he trains harder than either of his siblings, and is often covered in bandages from overworking himself.

Takes the most after Sonic despite everything, and is a fun-loving, quick-witted, and gentle person at his core. If isolated and given enough time to open up, he is actually very sweet.

Only ever confides in Andromeda, and cares about her deeply. He will often step in and take punishments in her stead.

A closeted nerd. Has a stash of old comic books that were given to him by a generous lab worker that he has read cover to cover countless times. He could quote any scene from memory.

Often speaks out against Void and his methods. Void has gotten very good a tuning him out on missions.

Lowest chaos energy reading of all Project Stellar experiments, but cannot be beat in willpower and determination. Notable for his inability to ever give up.

Has constant dark circles around his eyes from lack of sleep and stress. Rarely ever rests.

He is bisexual!

Original post with Stellar's failed lab sibs if they had survived:

[sant-riley]

[Little things] [Ghost x Reader drabble]

AN: My god, it's been a while, babes. Hi hello!! I hope everyone's doing well, I'm back with another mid ass writing piece for Ghost based off of my experience getting flowers for the first time! I hope yall enjoy, I'm rusty as fuck lmfao

Contents: Gender Neutral reader, pre-established relationship, Ghost may be a lil ooc! This is about 1.2k words :)

"Are…are those flowers…for me??"

"Yeah." He gently extends his arms forward, the bouquet of bright and dark flowers shining under the light.

It looks so comically small in his grasp, so out of place. He looks so damn awkward, not looking you in your eyes. Simon has his civilian clothing on, his hoodie pulled tight across his head, making a shadow go across the small opening for his eyes in the balaclava.

You can barely make out any expression on his face, he's taking great caution to shield it from you as best as he can.

A lump is in your throat, making it hard to breathe with all the emotions flooding through you.

Looking down at the flowers again, biting your lip to stop the small tremble in it.

You quickly inhale then exhale shakily, moving to grab the flowers from his grasp, your fingers brushing against his own, though his are of course covered in his signature skeleton gloves. Still, a shudder goes down your spine, before you finally take the bouquet into your dominant hand.

A beat passes while your eyes just stare down at the flowers, not realizing the feeling of wetness making a small trail down your face.

"Oi, hey, what's with the tears for?" Simon's face pops into view, his large hand grabbing your chin and facing you towards him. His eyes are squinted and worry and anxiousness swims in them. His hands move without thinking to rub his thumb under your eye, catching the tears, and brushing them off.

It's embarrassing really, all these years you've lived and you're crying over some flowers, something so small.

Regardless, you sniffle and the floodgates open again, more salty tears pooling down and falling onto the petals.

"No one has ever gotten me flowers before."

Not your parents, not your other family, never a partner either, never once has anyone gotten you even just a single flower. Be it fake or real, you've never received one.

It was never a big deal, you pretended it didn't bother you, even if deep down it hurt just a tad when others got them for a special occasion, whether it be valentines, a graduation, or a promotion. It's just some stupid flowers that will make a mess with petals and be a hassle to clean up when it dies, who needs them?

It was just something you had come to terms with, pushing it to the back of your mind. Convinced yourself you didn't need them, much less that you deserved any in the first place.

But Simon, Simon Riley had gone out of his way to get you flowers, without prompting. The big bad Lieutenant of task force 141 went out of his way to not only visit you but to bring fucking flowers.

Simon sighs, moving to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, feeling his heart clench painfully at your admission.

Despite the rough life he has grown up in, he always paid attention to how happy his mother was to receive flowers. His father was not the type of man to get them for her, but His mother was never afraid to get some on her own accord, to set the dining room table with, that she felt deserving of them and if no one else would get her any, she'd do it herself.

Simon never really took into account that he should get someone flowers, surely they'd just get it themselves if they really wanted. Staring down at you now, he realizes it's more so the thought behind the actions is what's more important, not the measly flowers themselves. The thought of someone getting you a bouquet just because it reminded them of you.

"I'm sorry it took you so long to get 'em, sweetheart." He speaks low, feeling regret that he didn't think to get you any earlier.

Simon lets out a grunt as you softly launch yourself at his chest, your arms wrapping around his neck as you shove your face into his shoulder, one hand carefully holding the gift. He wastes no time in wrapping one arm around your waist, his other free hand coming up to brush against the back of your head as he hums, resting his head against your own.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you."

It was just a nudge from Soap really, the scot making a small comment that surely you'd like some.

Simon didn't think much of it at the time until he passed by a flower shop on his way to meet with you at a nearby park, one of your regular days just to spend time with one another before you both inevitably were called back to duty.

He's sure he made the employee uneasy, his dark hooded and masked frame towering over her own as he roughly asked what kind of flowers he could get. Anyone with eyes could tell he was out of his element. God, he didn't know fuck all about flowers, the best he could guess were roses.

After a moment, the employee smiles warmly and asks who the person receiving them and while he's a man of few words, it wasn't hard to catch the softness in his tone when he spoke about you, the tinge of longing in his eyes when the employee politely asked if you were partners.

"No, just friends." He waved her off, not catching the look the young woman sent him. Just friends didn't get that look in their eyes, the full body relaxing at the mere mention of them, he was full of shit. 'Just friends' my ass, she thought.

"Well, how about this? I'll make a bouquet based on what you've told me and if you like it, you give it to them…?" She offered, already moving with a pair of scissors in her hand towards the small nursery.

Simon nodded simply, and the employee smiled as she pointed him towards a table to take a seat while she worked her magic.

It didn't take her long at all to pull all the flowers she decided to go with, taking them back to her station as she swiftly started arranging the flowers. Her hands worked efficiently as she finished it off with a plastic wrap, choosing a black bow (to match the lover boy's whole assemble) to wrap around the stems.

She quickly calls him over with a 'sir' and turns the bouquet towards him with a small "tada!".

The bouquet consisted of a dozen flowers, some big, some small, beautiful nonetheless. Camillas, Red carnations, daisies, gardenias, and Hydrangeas with some fillers scattered throughout.

Even if he wasn't a flower guy, he had to admit it was beautiful.

"Soooo, what do you think? Do you think these work for you?"

"Yeah, yeah they'll do." He's already reaching for his wallet, looking to grab cash to pay.

"This one's on me, alright? Ah- don't argue with me mister, just come back and let me know if they were loved."

She stuck out her pointer finger at the man, turning on her heel to start the clean-up process.

She heard him ruffle and grab the bouquet, making a grunt her way and leaving, the door bell chiming as he makes his way out,

Looking back at the counter, in her tip cup are two 50-pound bills left there. Letting out a sigh quickly followed by a smile, she wonders if the lucky person will get the hint with the flowers she picked out, after all, all flowers have meaning.

[novlr]

what is a good way to introduce side characters into a story without being overly descriptive

Interesting characters are essential to telling a great story. While your main characters are the stars of the show, side characters play a crucial role in adding depth, complexity, and realism to your narrative. However, introducing these supporting players can be a challenge, especially if you want to avoid the dreaded info dump. Let’s explore some effective ways to introduce side characters without overwhelming your readers with too much information at once.

The importance of side characters

Before we dive into the techniques for introducing side characters, let’s take a moment to appreciate their significance. Side characters serve many purposes in a story, from providing comic relief to offering a fresh perspective on the main plot. They can also act as foils for your protagonists, highlighting their strengths and weaknesses through contrast. Additionally, well-developed side characters can make your fictional world feel more authentic and lived-in, as if it exists beyond the confines of the main storyline.

Introduce side characters gradually

One of the most effective ways to introduce side characters without info dumping is to do so gradually. Instead of bombarding your readers with a character’s entire life story in one go, reveal details about them over time. Start with a brief description of their appearance, mannerisms, or role in the story, and then sprinkle in additional information as the narrative progresses. This approach allows readers to get to know the character organically, just as they would in real life.

Show, don’t tell

While it’s almost cliché now, another key strategy for introducing side characters is to show, rather than tell, who they are. Instead of simply listing a character’s attributes or history, demonstrate who they are through their actions, dialogue, and interactions with other characters. This allows readers to draw their own conclusions about the character based on what they observe, rather than being told what to think.

Use dialogue to reveal character

Dialogue is another powerful tool for introducing side characters without info dumping. Through conversations with other characters, side characters can reveal their personalities, motivations, and backstories in a natural and organic way. This allows you to convey important information without resorting to lengthy exposition or narration. For example, a side character might mention a past experience or share an opinion that sheds light on their worldview. By weaving these details into the dialogue, you can create a more nuanced and believable portrayal of the character.

Connect side characters to the main plot

To make side characters feel integral to your story, it’s important to connect them to the main plot in meaningful ways. Rather than having them exist in a vacuum, show how their actions and decisions impact the central narrative. This not only makes the side characters more relevant but also helps to create a more cohesive and interconnected story. For instance, a side character’s seemingly minor decision could inadvertently set off a chain of events that alters the course of the main plot. By establishing these connections, you give readers a reason to care about the side characters and their roles in the story.

Include a subplot

You can develop your side characters by writing them into a subplot. By giving them their own storylines that intersect with the main plot, you create opportunities to explore their motivations, challenges, and growth. These subplots can also serve to heighten the stakes of the main narrative, as the actions of side characters may have unintended consequences that ripple throughout the story. By carefully crafting these subplots, you can add depth and complexity to your side characters without overwhelming the reader.

Summing up

Introducing side characters without info dumping is a skill that takes practice and finesse. By revealing details gradually, showing rather than telling, using dialogue effectively, and connecting side characters to the main plot, you can create a rich and immersive fictional world that feels authentic and engaging.

Remember, side characters are more than just background noise; they are an essential part of any great story. By giving them the attention and development they deserve, you’ll take your writing to the next level and keep your readers coming back for more.

[ghouldtime]

Hiii it's me again lol

Okayokay, so I just finished reading your rant on the COD fandom's unique choice of pet names, and I'm gonna be straight up and say I'm going completely off topic and INSTEAD veer off to a side thing you pointed out to give my own opinion! This is a kinda hot take so I'm just screaming into the void hoping someone shares my thoughts 🖤

Sooo we all know the Ghost comics released alongside the OG MW2. I personally haven't read it due to the TWs but I've seen enough screenshots and summaries to get the gist of what happens. HOWEVER I believe those comics are only canon to 09 Ghost and doesn't apply to reboot Ghost, and this is what I meant about it being a hot take cuz almost everyone in the fandom agrees the comics happens for both. And I can definitely see why! I mean, we didn't exactly get any concrete backstory regarding reboot Ghost, so anything goes.

Where I stand on the line, I'm a firm believer of reboot Ghost being Just A Guy™️like he had a (relatively) chill childhood but there are some things that stay the same with the comics. Like Tommy scaring him with the skeleton mask when they were children, and Simon enlisting after the 9/11 attack (not sure if those are canon, it's just what I've heard so please correct me if I'm wrong). No abusive father, no Roba, no Christmas trauma. Sure it makes him less interesting but I find it pretty amusing how the person wearing a skull print balaclava has no real reason behind wearing it other than it looking cool lmao

Anyway, yap fest over! Hope you have a wonderful day/night and remember to hydrate! 🖤

- Biscuits 🌺

SALUTATIONS it's good to see you again, I hope you're doing swell as well :D 💚💚💚

Technically, what you're saying is true!

The '09 comics pair with the '09 character and are indeed cannon for only him as far as I'm aware (someone feel free to correct me if I'm wrong). The reboot lacks a true significant backstory. As in, if you search it up, you basically get "he joined the SAS and is super cool and is great at doing cool soldier things and probably can do a sick backflip". What we know about the reboot is basically what we experience in game. And until we get either another game focusing on his earlier life or have confirmed scenes of it, we really don't know.

Personally, how I distinguish "Ghost" as a being is as three versions.

You have '09 Ghost. '09 Ghost is the one we experienced in the OG games and the comics. He's the dead one - and the one with the actual official backstory. Those are both cannon and are tied to him as a character.

You then have Reboot Ghost. Reboot Ghost is, as the name entails, the reboot alone. Basically, what we have of him and know of him is what we experience in game. Technically, we don't know his backstory and the full extent of his life. Is it similar to his '09 counterpart? We don't know. He's kinda the "What you see is what you get". There's some things implied with his dialog but most of his story is up for debate.

And then we have what I'm calling Fandom Ghost who is the most common variant. Fandom Ghost is neither the reboot nor the '09 version - he's a middle ground. He's what everyone is thinking of when you hear 'Ghost'. Usually how I've seen him portrayed is the reboot with the '09 backstory or some semblance of that.

(Side note: I know it's quite typical to specify when you're referring to '09 Ghost specifically because he does, of course, have a very different history and outcome. Not to mention, the dynamics with him and Soap are very different than in the reboot which is another reason why people usually clarify and go "This is who I mean")

I've never actually seen a TRUE reboot Ghost that wasn't fandom based or fanon in writing, now that I think about it. Probably because it's not that easy to write about a character in a limited sense where you don't know much about them and you have to stick to the limited material you're given.

A lot of COD operators lack a significant backstory outside of their military history. That's mainly done because they're videogame characters of a military, shooting focused game and they don't usually have the time to go into depth as to why that character is the way they are. They're primarily soldiers who are saving the world and playing their role. You might see snippets here and there but the focus isn't on their background or the inner workings of their character in a very personal way, aside from what is revealed on missions to add a natural perspective and make them see more human

Because it's not like in the middle of a life or death situation you're going to sit down and explain that you had a dog growing up, you had three sisters, your favorite drink is Baja Blast, and you have a lifelong fear of Burger King.

'09 Ghost, however, we GOT a backstory. We were given something to work with. Clinging to that or melding it with the reboot, who lacks a backstory, is what a lot do because it's trying to make use of the best source material we got until we can maybe get something else too. Personally I was a fan of that backstory because it DID add depth to him, significantly so. I liked it.

Additionally, I think a LOT of people go that route too because it's something that's quite easy to look up so they don't need to make something themselves

(This is an entire theory and me putting on my tinfoil hat: There's a lot of people in the COD fandom who are just here for the big beefy men and don't do their research, haven't played the games - they're just assuming things. And when they see the fandom Ghost, they just assume it's true, and it spreads when they write their own stories. I hope this doesn't read like I'm trying to gatekeep or 'HOW DARE YOU NOT KNOW EVERYTHING' or 'you're not a true fan unless-', cause I really really really do not care. Do what makes you happy, but I'm going to avoid reading what I feel mischaracterizes him for sexual purposes alone hardcore)

I also like to imagine that maybe the team doing the reboots has enough common sense too to not entirely scrap such a backstory as hey, it IS interesting, so there's a strong possibility that reboot might share some origins. Kidding, I'm being fully delusional here and know they won't do that and will likely just ruin it and I'm hoping they don't have a chance. I know any new one they come up with -like the writing in the last campaign -would be utter carbonated hot dog water and I do not trust them at alllllll. I'm refusing to accept reboot Soap's death but that's a rant for another time

That being said though, there's technically no correct backstory yet for Reboot! Ghost aside from what we already know. Anything that adds backstory or melds anything else to him is making him fanon/fandom!Ghost (which is by far the most common iteration and the one people default too)

I love when people give him, and other COD characters, happy or somewhat not dramatic backstories. They already have enough going on with the wars they're thrown in, I live for them having a scrap of happiness and normality. I can't blame people for not wanting to write or deal with heavy backstories and it's nice to see variety and is SO super valid.

But at the same time, I also do like his OG backstory, I love seeing when people dig deeper into the gritty stuff too, exploring that side of characters because not everyone has the best life growing up. And joining the military and when they join can be telling too about their home life

Variety is the variety of life and when there's not exactly a cannon, then I love seeing people make their own reasonings and conclusions and write fanfics with their own theories. It's SO fun to explore what other people think and it really results in some of the sweetest fics that dive more into depth than the official writing team ever could hope to

The Ghost that I write are usually AU Ghosts anyhow so it allows me more flexibility in what I write. BUT if I'm writing for Ghost, I do the blend where it has more of the '09's backstory but his reboot vibes. THAT BEING SAID

I love making him just, A Dude©, still despite that. Having a bad past doesn't make him any less of a person - nor does it make him this ultra mega tough dominant edgy sigma bad boy. He's literally just a GUY. Sure, he has extensive SAS experience and training to boot. Sure, he's easily one of their top soldiers. He's a stone cold killer when he's Ghost. He's there to do the job.

But Simon? Simon's just a dude, like everyone else - they all are at the end of the day. Sure, they have their own personal struggles and do have to go through a lot, but they're still people. He goes to the grocery store and is genuinely confused about all the options of milk now (how the hell did they milk HEMP). He still makes his bed and has to fight the fitted sheet to stay on, using his size and strength to force it in place before it can do 'the thing' that all fitted sheets somehow do. He bought a bird feeder so he could watch the wildlife as he drinks his tea for breakfast. Speaking of tea, he has a whole collection! And the good shit, you know he won't settle for any less.

He's just A DUDE© at the end of the day and I love those mundane things because hell, he needs them to still feel human and to be reminded exactly what he's fighting for

I just find it so silly and ridiculous when he's consistently like "I'M Batman: I AM THE NIGHT" sheer dramatic levels of broody in stories or when he's put in as this mega dommy bad boy who is 6'5", growling constantly, and is like the posterchild for a wattpad biketok fanfic.

Lmaooo be for real, he's out here doing arts and crafts to make his masks. He has a whole paint collection and everything. He went into the craft store for paint and came out with two new hobbies and no, I'm not listening to anyone who says otherwise

[genolover]

I love characters who are flawed and have trauma and make terrible choices based on that trauma. I really do.

I'm saying this because while I've never been a huge sonic fan, I fucking love shadow. I have been all over shadows part in sonic x shadow generations. I am so hype for sonic 3, you don't understand and I did not watch the first 2 movies. I was only interested in shadow. Was.

See, I ship sonadow/shadonic and with the new movie reigniting my interest, I have been reading sonic fanfiction again. With fanfiction comes a need for context. With context comes the understanding that sonics life is so fucked up. Like, I kept seeing christmas island being used as sonics birth place and I looked it up and that's canon. Cool, he came from a place with snow and stuff. Guess who just found out it's named after the real life Christmas island, the island that the US used for nuclear testing back in the 50s without evacuating the nearby town (which there is another government run experiment on the moon in the 50s in canon. Im just saying, theres something we play with there) . And that's just side stuff, there's so much in the games and comics that's just messed up. My guy was stuck in a torture egg for 6 months in forces, and lost his memories but had to keep going in frontier.

I'm just saying this bad boy (smacks a hedgehog obsessed with chili dogs, a struggle food, yes I am reaching based on my own experience and will continue to do so) can hold so much trauma.

I will be overthinking this to make aus at work.

[poisonousquinzel]

"the only reason Harley's called Harley Quinn and not Harleen Quinzel or some other moniker is because the Joker manipulated her into thinking the similarity in her name and the name of a specific type of clown meant they were destined to be together and that means she's intrinsically tied to him forever and can't exist as a character on her own because her origin is tied to him" ass take has gotta be the worst one I've seen as of late,,, like really can't lie it's stuck in my head lol 😭

i wish i could go about life misunderstanding characters this much and thinking that one who's been a canonical domestic abuse victim since her og origin episode / comic, who is partly (story wise) inspired by a real life dv victim who survived

In the afterword, artist Bruce Timm shares that their Harley was based in part on a real-life friend who was stuck in an abusive relationship: “I’m happy to report that the ‘real-life Harley’ did finally break away from her ‘Joker’ and has been happily married to another man for several years now.”

[Source]

is a character who's "girlbossified" when she's allowed to grow past and outside of her abuser himself,, and that that means idk writing her without him dilutes her character and takes away everything interesting and flawed about her? that she should never be written without him / without her world revolving around him, due to him being the catalyst in her origin?

The Joker's part of her origin because he was the root cause of her fall, the villain, the bad guy, the abuser. that doesn't mean she's required to be forever tied to him?

This isn't even a problem in the actual comics or anything. It's just absolutely 100% not.

No one even pretends Joker isn't intrinsically tied to her story, or more specifically her trauma. No one in real life and no one in their universe.

Tim Drake literally mentioned The Joker in like the last chapter of her (2021 - ) comic ffs!!! 😭

"Did the Joker make you want to do that? Do you wanna unpack that, Harley? Do you wanna talk about The Joker?!"

Harley Quinn (2021-) #42

But it's almost like people grow and heal and evolve. Her codependency and shit are flaws that are not permanent and are things she (can) and is working on.

She's riddled with flaws and they've gone nowhere! she's just trying her best to stay afloat and better herself bit by bit because she isn't Dr. Harleen Quinzel anymore, she can never walk into a medical building and apply and expect them to not know who she is upon a singular search in the system.

She's just Harley Quinzel now, she still has the skills and experience and schooling, but she also has a long serious criminal record, severe mental health issues and is living in a city that rightfully does not trust her. She can't go back, she can't get her old life back, and she can't go back to being Her, The OG "New & Improved" Harley Quinn who's world revolved around 1 person and him alone, because she would die.

He'd kill her, maybe not immediately, but he would be the death of her.

And she knows that. It's a lose lose.

The only real option she has is to lay down and die or to survive. To float and swim bit by bit until she finds stable ground.

Until she finds a way to live with herself again.

Harley's "obliviousness" is a coping mechanism that we literally see her dealing with since BTAS.

A warped world view that does in fact make her actions more complex,, and makes the aftermath / come down all the harder for her as she has to grapple with the internal traumatic response to Everything with Joker while also dealing with the world she's waking up to and realizing the real reality of her actions and the actual pain it left behind. It's literally been in her character plain as day since her First Personal Comic from 2000!

It's something taken seriously and something she knows, regardless if she even remembers the crime, that she has a responsibility to take accountability for. She almost lets Clown Hunter execute her because she was involved in his parents death, even though she doesn't remember the night, she trusts Batman enough that if he says she was there, she was. And she's going to own up to being there. She starts a therapy group for ex clowns post Joker War, she's become a (court ordered) professor and during all of these arcs Joker and his influence on her and her life are mentioned and acknowledged and present.

He's not been removed as an intrinsic aspect of her story, but he is no longer the center of her world and that is a good thing.

It's almost like character growth after 30 goddamn years is something that happens.

And! you know who else is intrinsically tied to Harley Quinn's character just as much as The Joker?

Poison Ivy and Batman.

Her three primary connections since the Beginning, since the original series that everyone wants to pretend was so so different about her than it ever was, was Joker, Batman and Ivy.

And a primary goal (Harley wise) for 2/3 people she's been connected to since Batman The Animated Series has literally been to get her away from the 3rd. They've just successfully helped save her in most universes now, even when she's the one who pulls the trigger in the end.

It's been over 4 years since I made this blog and I still cannot wrap my head around this fandom's deep seeded hatred and disdain for actual character development.

"Sorry", but that's just such a disgusting take built on misinformed foundations and idk a personal rage for bad guy characters not being bland, predictable one note entertainment for the rest of their miserable existence in comics until they're shelved for being fucking boring one note d-list characters?

[brigoesrahhh]

"Main Attraction"

Jonathan Ohnn / The Spot x f!Reader.

Part one, Part two, Part three.

1.8k words.

Summary: While Jonathan showed you around the science lab, you were busy thinking about other things. One thing leads to another… and suddenly you're making out.

After walking around the lab for around an hour, you were starting to get a little tired. You didn't typically do this much walking at your sit-down office job, but it was nice to have a change of scenery.

A lot has changed for you recently. It was almost becoming a pattern with Jonathan.

Like the way he would stand closer to you when you strayed a little too far from him, adoring the sight of you fascinated by a model of his work. You were so interested and intrigued by the nerdy science shit he thought would bore you. But there you stood, staring at a diorama of the collider and trying to figure out which pieces represented what.

It was all so different.

After watching you take in the small model, he was curious to see your reaction to the real thing.

He walked you over to an open hallway, displaying the super-collider blocked off with a glass barrier.

“So this is the main attraction: Kingpin’s super-collider.” He sighs at the brief mention of his boss. “It’s pretty top secret, so I’m not allowed to tell you much, but essentially, you can bring stuff from other multiverses through it. It’s pretty crazy,” he chuckles in a bit of his own disbelief. “I just run experiments to see how the machine’s working and test out what it can do. Pretty cool, huh?” He looks over at you, trying to gauge your reaction.

So this is why he was so stressed. And rightfully so, because wow — you never would’ve guessed that this is what all of the plans at Alchemax were based on. Your lips were slightly parted, visibly showing your surprise at the capabilities of the new technology. He laughed softly as you tried to wrap your mind around it. While you were distracted, he slipped an arm around your shoulder, pulling you closer to him.

You happily obliged, leaning your head on his shoulder and staring over the high-security glass at the large, laser looking machine. You could feel him heat up a bit at the contact, and he now entertained himself by drawing patterns on your arm with his thumb.

You put your hands in your pocket and fiddled with the metal keycard under the fabric, while you tried to imagine what his life was like. You pictured what he looked like and how he acted when he was happy, stressed, or even sad. The image of him working endless nights, the image of him accidentally falling asleep in his chair holding a cold, half-empty cup of coffee.

He lightly squeezed your shoulder, bringing your attention back to him. You turn to look at him, and he's… content. Though maybe a little worried that he shared too much information with you, as your face becomes more strung and deep in thought.

While he thought you were thinking about the science, you were thinking about the scientist behind it. Now it was your turn to crush on him.

His face had a warm glow that you couldn't help but feel giddy about. You first noticed this aura of his when he first sat down at your table at the cafe just a few days ago. Then again, when he wandered into your office like a lost puppy, looking for its owner. He sought you out, time and time again. And now you have this keycard, leading straight to him—

"Y/n? Are you alright?" He worries, turning to face you more directly and get a better read on your expression.

You nod your head silently, trying to decide what to do.

He laughs a little nervously, worried that he confused you too much. "Im sorry, I know I'm just dumping a lot of stuff on you-"

You weren’t sure how he would react, but...

"Can I kiss you?" you ask quietly.

His jaw comically dropped, and his face went blank, turning bright pink.

"I uhm- Yes. Yes, please." He laughs sheepishly, turning his body to face you.

You smiled at him a little nervously, taking a deep breath before meeting his lips. You placed your hand on his chest, feeling his heart beat out of his chest.

It was a short kiss, but the unbelievable look on Jonathan's face made you giggle. He pulled you closer to him, shyly wrapping his arm around yours and cuddling himself into your side. You took it that he wasn't used to these types of situations, so you removed your arm from his and pulled in his waist instead, which he seemed to appreciate.

You admired his flushed face as he looked out through the glass barrier at the massive collider. He seemed to drift away from the present, with a tiny smile never leaving his face.

After a few peaceful moments, he turned to you again, watching you smile at him. He giggled sheepishly, not realizing that you had been looking at him. He stared at you for a second before leaning into you again, pressing his lips against yours in a soft and gentle embrace.

You kissed back with a bit more fervor, wanting to show him the small extra bit of love that he was too scared to initiate. He accepted this quickly and matched your pace, running his tongue across yours briefly. It was a sweet moment, overcoming both of your minds and connecting you together. He searched for your hands and intertwined them with his, occasionally mumbling sweet compliments that you couldn't quite understand through his kisses.

"So pretty... mm... knew it when I first saw you... in the office..." he mumbles, breathing a little heavier and marking your face as his own as he planted small kisses all over your plush cheeks and lips. You blushed softly at his sweetness, and he took it as an opportunity to kiss you properly once more.

While he was busy decorating your face with kisses, he hadn't heard the soft click of the keycard reader being scanned, followed by an unlocked door. It was only when he heard footsteps that he froze, his head whipping around in the direction of the sounds.

"Shit," he murmured, throwing himself up on his feet and putting his hands on either side of your waist.

Your head tilted up to look at him, surprised at the urgency.

"John?" you questioned, standing up at his encouraging hands pulling you up next to him. "What's going on?"

The nickname warmed his heart, but he tried to stay focused as his heartbeat quickened at the interruption. "You're not supposed to be here... I uh- forged the keycard for you." He admitted, still pulling you by your waist around the lab, looking for a place to... hide you? "It's kinda forbidden for any workers to enter this lab…"

"What? Should I go now?" You ask, now processing the situation.

"No, no- shh..." He whispers, holding you close and scurrying away from the collider viewpoint, to behind a lab table. He crouched down, and you followed him, sitting together in the cramped hiding space.

He looked at you briefly, waving a hand for you to stay down. He peeked over the end of the table, watching as his coworker, Olivia Octavius turned the corner.

"What's happening?" You whisper to him, not being able to see her walk around the lab tables, briefly stopping to log into her computer. He held his hand over your mouth, looking into your eyes with a seriousness you'd never seen him show before. You immediately silenced when his eyes met yours, and you felt your heart skip a beat with the look in his eyes. His head quickly whipped around when he heard her hum a soft tune, and he figured that she was probably distracted enough now for you two to move to a safer place to hide.

"Follow me," he quietly instructed, grabbing your hand and slowly pulling you both up on your feet, giving you the signal to start slowly walking towards his new hiding spot.

The bathroom.

It would have to do for now, you suppose.

You followed him with sneaky steps, quietly moving towards the doors. Since he was a scientist, you figured Jonathan was good at making such calculated decisions, and so you trusted him that he had a plan.

He snuck around the corner he was eyeing, which was a direct path to the bathroom. The only problem? Octavius' computer was also in direct sight of the doorway.

Jonathan took a moment to figure out the best steps to take, mouthing his instructions to himself. You found this quirk of his quite cute, but let him continue to think without interrupting him.

"Alright, come." He whispered softly to you without turning around to face you. You followed him, quickly stepping over to the bathroom and walking into the dark room without turning on the lights to alert her.

As you entered the bathroom, you could hear Octavius typing away on her computer, oblivious to your presence in the lab. The darkness provided some cover, but you couldn't help but feel a rush of excitement mixed with anxiety as you tiptoed your way into the bathroom.

You carefully closed the door behind you to minimize any noise. The faint glow from the hallway provided just enough visibility for you to avoid tripping on any tiles.

"Phew-" he exhaled with relief, taking the chance to catch his breath. The trip wasn't physically taxing, but he was so worried that he was going to be separated from you that he tired himself out.

"Who is she?" You ask curiously, tilting your head in question.

"Oh, that's the other scientist working on the collider, Olivia Octavius. She's a, uh… an interesting character." He states, laughing softly. He seemed somewhat fond of her, but didn't want to tap into it that much.

"Should I be worried about her?" You ask, your voice laced with an underlying concern.

"No, no, she's not that scary. I'd just rather not get caught sneaking someone around, you know?" He answers, a little embarrassed. You laugh softly at his awkward reaction, and pull him in by the waist. He becomes flustered at the gesture, and lands on top of you.

He blushes at the close contact, and you pull him in closer. He squirms under your secure hold, tightly pressing his chest against yours. You crash your lips onto his, finally giving him the kiss you had been waiting to continue.

"Mmph!-" He moans at the sudden contact of your lips, taking a few seconds to register what was happening before kissing back.

He let out a few more soft sounds as you made out, slowly unwinding and getting lost in your arms. As the intensity of the kiss grows, you can feel the tension and anticipation between you both. The world around you fades away, leaving only the two of you locked in this passionate embrace.

After all, the main attraction hadn’t been the collider. It was Jonathan Ohnn.

—

☆ --- taglist: @penguiqueen-blog , @cochayuyo-wapo , @average-lettuce-enjoyer , @generalkenobi36

[endermaybe]

I loved reading the "From Eden" story, written by @aquaquadrant and the accompanying art by @lunarcrown. I keep thinking about the story/world, so I decided to be kind to myself and write it out, so at least my thoughts will be organized.

Or so I thought. It turned out to be more of a ramble than a coherent piece of text. I'm not gonna do it to myself to check and clear up everything, it's supposed to be a fun write, not a chore. I've made a lot of (obvious) observations and asked a lot of questions, but that's me just 'thinking out loud'. And I knew it would be long, but I hadn't expected it to be this long. I'm not sure if anyone will be interested in reading all of it, but here it is anyway.

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I love it, and everything about it.

I love the whole "Hells to Pay" universe. I love how alive the universe feels while at the same time it still feels very much like Minecraft. I love how it has very much game logic while at the same time having very real stakes and dangers.

I love the characters, both the ones based on youtubers and the original ones. The first category are clearly recognizable with their way of speaking and mannerisms and the latter seem just as well developed. I love how everyone has depth. Everyone has strengths and weakness, even if it's not always obvious. No one is fully good and even the worst characters have some good qualities. And everyone has the ability to change and learn, for better or for worse, but only if they choose so.

I love the writing. The way it's structured makes it fun and easy to read. The wording very much supports the world and it's characters. I love how it lingers on some moments and quickly goes over others, it feels very natural. And though I am the kind of person that wants to know anything about a universe/story they love, I do think that the amounts of exposition and explanation are great. More would probably hinder the telling of the story itself. And I love all the extra bits of the world told through answering other peoples asks.

I love the art. Everyone is unique and easy recognizable. The bodylanguage and faces are really expressive. It's great to see. Beside that, it's also an artstyle that I just really enjoy.

So onto more details of the story. A LOT more details, I basically did another deep read to make sure I didn't miss anything. Spoilers I guess for anyone who hasn't read the story but somehow did find this post.

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Lunarcrown's into comic looks amazing. It also wonderfully shows what kind of world Hels can be and the nightmare that is Tango's life. When I found the story, this intro was enough to get me hooked.

I think it's funny that the first part of an eleven chapter story (of which two are two-parters) is called a one-shot in the authors notes. I mean, I'm not a native English speaker and all that, but I don't think that's correct. Was it intended to be a stand-alone story? Had it been the plan for the AU to be told through short stories?

It's a small thing but I like how every new chapter/place is introduced by "Somewhere in [insert world], a player [is introduced, doing something]", with very minimal variations. It's a nice returning bit, through the whole story.

The way Tango's imprisonment is described is chillingly beautiful. It's horrific, but at the same time almost casual. But that's what is has become for Tango: just another day. In the same way, the manner of escaping is grueling, showing clearly his desperation. Well done.

It's so clearly noticeable, even through the immediate relief of escaping Hells Tek, that he's been through so much and that it impacted him so much. And then he decides to hide it and pretend it didn't happen for another decade. Even if he didn't fool people nearly as much as he thinks he did, it's so sad he though he needed to do that. Not to say that I can't understand it. Sadly, it probably stopped him from openly enjoying what he had: his freedom, all the wonderful experiences of the overworld and his friends. It's an amazing first chapter.

Also I love the way you write Xisuma.

And hello Bravo. I don't really like him as a character, too arrogant and snobbish. But at the same time, I love his journey and it's fun to follow him. He didn't deserve to be stranded here. But then again, that was kinda the point of the Universe's little experiment. I wonder, if he would one day learn about that, would it make him feel better or worse?

It's interesting to see his outside view of Hermitcraft. And them being considered a private bunch in this universe, while we see them pretty much place every block of their megabases, through streams and timelapses. Then again, in-story Hermitcraft is only in it's second world/season. I haven't been following Hermitcraft for THAT long, but it probably isn't a fair comparison. I wonder which of the Hermits Bravo was familiar with. Some of the redstoners, probably.

Timmy leaving his save spot to talk to Bravo wasn't something I noticed om my first read, and it's sweet of him. I love Timmy, and at the same time I want to yell at him for taking such poor care of himself. It's nice to see that through all he experienced he hasn't lost his kindness.

I've been definitely overthinking this, but while rereading Timmy explaining what Hels is to Bravo I was wondering how he knew the difference between Hells and a normal world. The logical explanation would be that some other player told him. But I remembered a post were there was mentioned Timmy was a Listener and I am a sucker for any Watcher Lore (and your version is great), so my mind came to the conclusion that a Watcher told Timmy. After all, he seems so lonely and so attention starved, that he would probably love it when the Watchers are around him. Maybe he tries to talk to them, make them stay a little longer. Most Watchers wouldn't be interested in him, since they can't make him leave. They would only be at spawn if someone more interesting has died without a respawn point. But maybe... Maybe some of the nicer Watchers decide to humor him, and talk for a moment. Maybe after a few times, they discover it's nice to sometimes just have a conversation with a player and just... start telling him things. Random bits of trivia, events that they've Watched somewhere else, things about their old lives. They would still be mostly doing other Watcher stuff, but when they are bored, or were about to visit Hels' spawn anyway, they stop by a certain avian.

Like I said, I've been overthinking this. It probably doesn't fit your story, but it has been fun to imagine. I like the idea that Timmy is one of the few players that is completely comfortable with being a Listener. And I like the idea of someone that people don't spend a second thought on casually having conversations with literal deities.

Back to Bravo for a moment. The stretchend out death-loop that is his way out of spawn is interesting to see. He starts out relatively optimistic but get's a hard and painful lesson on what life in Hels is like. By the time he meets the Arena recruiters he seems to understand why Timmy doesn't leave spawn. Bravo is glad with the resources he has, even though in any other world a second-day player would probably put him to shame. His first instinct on seeing players approach him is now to hide. He's already changed a lot, probably without even realizing it. And that is before he snaps.

The symmetry between the ending of one chapter and the start of the other is well done. One duo dies and Bravo finally gets a break in his struggle to survive. Another duo dies and Tango has a big setback in the game he's participating in.

The tone of chapter 3 is very different from the previous chapters. For a big part, it is an adaptation of Jimmy's and Tango's first episodes of the Double Life series. It's impressive how that part is both true to the source and a good adaptation. And then it smoothly transforms in your own work. Well done.

"They have only one bed." Look, I am very new to fanfiction, but even I know that this is a classic. I don't mind. Classics are classics for a reason, and you've written it good. I love the awkwardness here between the two of them.

Somehow the thing that's hardest to believe is that Grian would be the one to propose an end to the death-game, and it's funny that other characters seem to find that hard to believe as well. But it's a fun set-up to change mid-way in a death game to a survival world.

The addition that the soulbound can make you aware of your partners feelings and that it amplifies whatever is already between them. And thank you Impulse, for sharing your wisdom and for talking some sense into Tango. All the things Tango worries Jimmy will hate about him, seem to be the things he hates himself for. No wonder he feels unlovable. And thank you Pearl, for giving Tango some perspective.

So much of this chapter is just lovely and wholesome. After the Ranches have one good conversation, things just organically develop. Their relations grows closer and stronger. Tango learns to love and how it feels to be loved, he learns to be vulnerable, he slowly starts lowering his walls. There are still mountains of old pain, but there are new pieces that are healing as well. Thank you Jimmy, for being the healer that Tango needs. If only it would last.

Back to Hels. It's a nice detail that beds are a high end item. I guess that means making wool from string isn't possible (4 string into wool never felt right anyway). Though an anchor would prevent a long death loop by running out.

The inner workings of Hels Tek are a nice bit of information, though the place itself definitely is not. How does it compare to other redstone labs, like iRaid? Many workers probably only tolerate the restricting of their freedom because it's still better inside than being alone on the outside.

Clear is a fun character, especially when interacting with Atlas. He can get away with almost anything because he is just to valuable to loose in Atlas' eyes. He is a tragic mess but highly intelligent and takes pride in his work.

It's very telling that young Atlas, with just two minutes of life experience, already assumed the worst of others. That is not something he learned. Why would someone bother to plug a hole at spawn? Ease of traveling? And it's wood, valuable and burnable, it could have been part of a make-shift bridge, or something. Atlas really is the worst. Oh, and rule number one of Minecraft: don't dig straight down, smart guy.

It felt strange to me that Timmy lied to Atlas about Bravo, while pointing them in the direction that Tango want, the guy Atlas is actually looking for. But now I realize that Tango could "still see spawn in the distance", just before the portal spawned. Did Timmy in turn actually see Tango leaving and Bravo joining, from his higher vantage point? That would mean he probably did protect Tango, by not telling the full truth. Also, he's seen both of them. Has he noticed their likeness?

I hadn't caught on to Timmy casually lying Bravo in the first few times I read this chapter. It's sweet. And that he is able to do so while sounding casual surprises me. It feels like a stark contrast with his counterpart, who seems to be a bad liar and with an very emotive voice. And Timmy managed to do so in the face of a powerful man who has already subtilty threatened him and his with minions around. A quiet display of (inner) strength.

Timmy has delayed Atlas and Bravo meeting for five years, half the time Bravo spend in Hels. Five years without answers, five years without any hope of returning. If Atlas had found him the next time Bravo respawned (shot by a skeleton, if matched up chapter II and V correctly) Atlas would have put things together. Bravo would probably have jumped at the chance to get to Hels Tek, to civilisation, and he hadn't learned the "healthy Hels skepticism" yet. Atlas would be his savior! And would have been able to fully shape Bravo's image of Hels. Now, Bravo had to build his own image. Would he think it would have been worth those five years? Maybe, after he finally escaped Hels. I hope so, for Timmy's sake.

Tango had five more years on the overworld because of Timmy's lie. Five years of healing, but also five years of hiding and festering. He would have been in the fifth or sixth world of Hermitcraft, which would have had more resources than Double life. But the Hermit are more thinly spread and not focused on pvp. And on Hermitcraft, Tango probably would have been alone, when Hels Tek came for him. Others would have probably too far away to reach him in time, if they even knew were to go. Or maybe Tango would have been lucky and Hels Tek would have entered minutes before the final battle of the season 6 Prank War. Probably not but that would have been funny. There is a chance that the five extra years were unnecessary and only stopt him from fully healing but I think its way more likely that it saved him. On Double Life and with Jimmy at his side it seems that everything was exactly right for Tango being saved and to make sure his past won't come back to hound him anymore.

I truly hope that Timmy's little lie made things better in the end. I didn't realize that I had so much to say about one sentence in the story. I hope you didn't mind the sidetrack.

Atlas looking for Tango in the Arena seems to be the reason that the recruiters that made Bravo snap ran into him in the first place. Credits were it's due, thank you Atlas, for giving Bravo the means to gain things like good food, end-game armor and weapons. I still don't like you.

Considering Alisker has a spy in Hels Tek, and doesn't actually want hybrid farming to succeed, could the failing of respawn anchor be due to sabotage? Or maybe it was just the will of the Universe. Also, Alisker humiliating Atlas is very satisfying.

The downward spiral of Hels Tek is also very satisfying. It seems that Atlas never bothered to make any protocol for things taking a turn for the worst. I guess that just would be unimaginable for him. And then dr. Clear manages to halt that spiral in one lucid peptalk. That makes me sad that his lucid moments seem to be so rare and frustrated that he uses his skills and talents for Hels Tek. Clear Cut's mental health issues could be some form of heavy depression. That would be treatable. Earlier in the chapter it was mention he has to use potions of swiftness to be functional, but that sounds like management to me, not treatment.

The difference between Atlas meeting Bravo, and Atlas meeting a young Tango is interesting. Tango's base is hidden, while Bravo's is not. Bravo asks questions before deciding whether to attack, while Tango does not. Both of them are wary, but Tango seems eager to work in a redstone lab, while Bravo only sees it as a way home. All of these differences seem to be learned, though. And young Tango is cute.

Bravo at the start of chapter VI has plenty of Hels experience, but without Atlas having manipulated his worldview yet. Still, it's not a pretty picture. He thinks Atlas is probably dangerous because "he’s from Hels, after all". As if overworlders can't be dangerous. Does he know how players on anarchy servers can be? Does he know how an UHC works?

Overworld players gain the ability to travel between world as teenagers, and Bravo mentions next chapter that he probably stopped aging while still looking young. Tango was recruited as a teen, and spent only a few years in Hels Tek. He is the same age as Bravo. In other words, Bravo probably didn't have that much of a window between gaining access to multiverse travel and getting trapped in Hels. Maybe Bravo is just naive when it comes to overworld players.

You know, I really thought Atlas was the one to bring out the worst in Bravo, but perhaps all he did was stop Bravo from examining his own biases. I know Hels is a though place but I can't believe Bravo is that special for having a grand total of three pieces of furniture. He also already considers hybrid players part monster. One of his first thoughts on hearing Hels is an actual prisonworld is that the players that have spawned here must deserve it. And when Atlas guesses that Tango managed "to utilize [Bravo's] connection to leave Hels", Bravo interprets that as Tango willingly trapping him.

Bravo's early days in Hels Tek probably mirror those of Tango. A rundown of practices and procedures of the place, other scientist gathering information about him, leaving the communicator with other scientist to let them figure out the data. Probably to work with the same iron farm scientist Bravo talked to. But Bravo is aware what it's actually for, Tango was fed lies. And Tango was a teenager that had probably grown up feral and just entered a community for the first time.

Hels!Keralis is another fun character. I love that one of the extreme traits that he got from his counterpart is more eyes. How does he know that Bravo isn't from Hels? With the number of eyes he has it somehow wouldn't surprise me if he has some sort of special sight. Or it could be corporate spionage.

I haven't mentioned it before but the way you write the passage of time, with short snippits to show significant moments or changes, is very good. It really gets across how not everything happens in short order, how events can have far reaching effects and how change can happen slowly. It also helps you feel that time has passed and the world isn't static.

Once Bravo had his first impression of Patho, he really didn't bother updating his opinion unless other players made him. Bravo wonders what it could take to loose an eye, and there is something that can do that. In some of the worldbuilding posts it's mentioned that Martyn lost one eye, and Grian both of them, to Watchers. It would make sense that an experienced player would be recruited, but it could also just be an coincident. Bravo disapproves of the fangirling towards Patho, but I wouldn't be surprised if he once was a big fan of Etho. Legendary overworld redstoner and all that. (IRL during April Fools 2013, Etho was famous enough to get his own Minecraft block) The manner Patho let's Bravo know that he doesn't like to be touched is way over the top. Patho is another interesting character, but one of those that I'm very glad of that he's fictional. At the same time it's sweet of Patho that he is very much willing to educate others and share his knowledge.

I like the touch that the first two times the portal is lit, it has everchanging colours. Like the Hermitcraft portal Tango went trough. And it's later explained that inter-world portals have unique color-paterns, depending on their destination. So Tango is still on Hermitcraft in the early attempts. After that it switches to the red-yellow-green of the Traffic SMP/Life Series.

Bravo almost shows some critical thinking and empathy when he finds the Tango Tek farm, but it's immediately ruined when Atlas shows up. I hope Bravo gets nightmares about this when he finally learns how to self-reflect. Bravo's sarcastic reply on whether he has said his goodbyes is telling. He could have made friends if he had wanted to, I'm sure. The scientist had been welcoming and curious about him, and as a redstoner himself it's not as if they had nothing in common. That's a good base to build upon.

His first moments in ten years in the overworld are beautiful. Though Bravo has very many flaws, I do have sympathy for him gotten trapped in Hels. But not for anything else at the moment.

Jimmy reflecting on getting to know the Hermits is fun and wholesome. The little things he has learned about Tango, the thing he seems to love most about him, seem to be mainly related to being a blaze hybrid. All the things that are just Tango. That makes Bravo's claim that he should have been Jimmy's soulmate just plain wrong.

The whole conversation between Jimmy, Tango and Bravo is amazing. Jimmy is trying to figure out what is going on and all is knows for certain is that the person he loves is scared and hurting. And once again Bravo almost seem to realize the universe isn't as black and white as he though it was.

And then the fight! Tango's terror and fight response. Jimmy's terror. Tango's shutdown when he realized that he hurt Jimmy. Just wow. And Jimmy's reaction to seeing Tango freezing up is pretty much forgetting he is on fire because Tango needs him! Poor, poor Tango. Bravo clearly sees himself as a good guy by taking back his rightful place and trying to help Jimmy, not realizing that for Jimmy he is the villain and the leader of the group that invaded the Ranch and is kidnapping his boyfriend. And Jimmy placing himself between the invaders and the portal, knowing he can't win is a beautiful show of his care, courage and determination. These guys have very shallow definitions of strength and weakness.

The Cavalry arrives! And the announcing their presence with the horns is very much Double Life. I know that battles are hard to write, but you did an amazing job with it. It's definitely chaotic with much going on, but it's clear to read and good to follow. Every Lifer does their part in the battle and everyone has their own fighting style.

Was Bravo so angry of Atlas that he tried to follow him back to Hels? The place that he tried to leave for ten years? The moment the portal breaks he is surrounded by overworlders. He can blame the battle going wrong and the mistrust of the players on Atlas, but they give Bravo a chance to explain himself and he messed that up all on his own. And Bravo has seen they are pretty much what he thinks overworlders should be. It's a server where they don't grief bases, where they work/fight together, where they defend each other, where they ask questions and don't immediately attack. (Outside the battle, but that doesn't count, they saw their servermates in trouble.) But they don't welcome Bravo as one of their own. They restrain him and mistrust him. They don't see him as different from the other players that came trough the portal. ("What did you guys do to him", emphasis mine) They hear his explanation but don't believe him. They dislike it so much they kill him, meaning this time he is send to Hels and it's not a fluke or mistake. It's overworld players wanting him gone.

I don't think he realizes this, not at first at least, he has his mind on other things. But once he has time to process what happened? It has got to hurt, even if he doesn't admit to himself he was wrong. I think it all does help later with Tango's words finally reaching him.

Jimmy's fear of not knowing were Tango is when the portal is broken is so real. So is the relief on knowing he's still (physically) with them. Scar being the one to shoot Bravo feels right. Scar has a goofy and easygoing demeanor, but he is very capably and not someone who you should cross, and Bravo did that by saying nasty things about his friend.

It's a relief that Bravo has finally up enough to stop working with Atlas. Progress? His fight against the hired muscle parallels the fight Tango had in brutality, as much as he might deny it. and slicing his own neck is brutal as well.

I'm still not sure how to feel about the Bravo/Timmy reunion. I'm happy that Timmy isn't alone anymore, that he is with someone who has been, not quite nice, but at least polite towards him. At the same time Bravo isn't doing this for the right reasons, he later admits as much himself. He is using Timmy as a substitute for Jimmy. Thing is, he doesn't know Jimmy. Is he really so hung op over the whole 'should-be-soulmates' thing over a stranger? I don't get it, and that could very wel just be a me problem. But he does want Timmy around, even if he's not Bravo's first choice. Since Bravo stepped through the portal that was supposingly taking him to Hermitcraft, Timmy might have been the only one that has been there for him. Timmy was the one who explained Hells to him, without trying to manipulate him. He has been welcoming to him. He has been the one who showed sympathy when Bravo died. The only thing Timmy wanted was not to be alone, but he didn't force that. I hope Bravo's biases don't blind him towards all that.

And that final sentence. If he can’t have the sun, he’ll learn to love its shadow. I know I haven't been the only one going crazy over that. That one sentence it saying so much. I've also have been (over)thinking what that makes Timmy, symbolism wise. The sun doesn't actually have a shadow, being a light source. But there is one thing, it isn't a real shadow, but there is something that is a lack of sunlight. If Jimmy is the sun, Timmy is the night sky. Both are beautiful on their own.

Back to Double life and their aftermath of the battle. I like that you fully wrote the aftermath. Things like this often get skipped or summarized. Now things have calmed down a little, the players have room to feel their exhaustion, their fear, their pain, to become more aware of their wider surroundings and to start figuring out what actually happend. It seems that no matter the universe, the Ranch is destined to burn down. It's sad to see, especially with how warm and cosy you had written the place. And ofcourse Etho and Joel have water buckets, with that clutching trick they love doing.

The state Tango is in, is heartbreaking. No one seems to be sure how to handle that situation, except Impulse, but that might just be appearances. Impulse and Jimmy have a very similar comforting warmth around them, I'm not sure how to call it. So, while Jimmy might feel useless (and the 'intrusive thoughts' aren't helping), I don't think he would have done a bad job with helping Tango. But Impulse has known Tango for years, and has some experience. And he didn't just went through the things that Tango or Jimmy just did. Jimmy's comment about the lights show that he does know Tango, no matter what he thinks. It's interesting that the comments from the Watchers right after are ambiguous in whether they are directed at Jimmy or Impulse.

You cannot sleep, there are monsters nearby. That sentence fills me with dread ever time I read it. It's a dread probably every survival minecrafter knows. And for that sentence to be directed towards Tango is devastating. Luckily Jimmy knows just wat to say to pull Tango out of it. The whole conversation after feels beautifully sad and vulnerable and raw. And it's once again devastating that Tango still feels that he has to be strong in front of Jimmy and only let's himself cry when he thinks there's no one to see it. But Jimmy is not doing nothing, he is being Tango's shoulder to cry on, an that is worth a lot.

The game-chat log of the battle is a fun read. It's very bare-bones, due to it's nature but it gives a good overview and a good indication of how the other Lifers reacted. You have a very good grasp of how you can use the chat in the story. Also, good job Bravo, you did the impossible and make Jimmy hate someone.

Tango's desperate attempt to avoid talking about what happend is painful, and it doesn't exactly work when other players were actually there to witness it. He's still afraid of being rejected because of the truth. And when de finally talks about his past he uses the word 'evil' to describe the players of Hells multiple times, he really believes it. Of course, his friends know better. I like how mad the Lifers are about Tango's past, how offended they are for his sake. And Tango's fear of they kicking him out never crossed their minds.

Whether or not it makes sense for this AU to have a concept of years, I'm glad they exists because it makes it much easier as a reader to keep track of time and of a player maturity. Gradual growth isn't really a thing in Minecraft, so it could even work as kind of sub-growth-stages between player children, teens and adults.

Another vulnerable conversation between Tango and Jimmy, with Tango admitting things he probably never said out loud before. But how bad is it really if he found a healthy way indulge in his questionable desires? And it's not like death is permanent. I can't argue with Tango saying he's messed up, but that's the trauma, not an inherent part of him.

I don't think he has deceived and lied as much as he thinks he has. His friends seemed to realize that Tango had a traumatic past and that some things set him of. They knew Tango didn't want to talk about it so they didn't ask. And he may have hidden his past and a part of his personality, but that was mostly lying by omission. Were the parts of his personality he did show false? Did he not want people to have fun with his games? I highly doubt that.

And it's not as if he's the only one with questionable personality traits on this server. In chapter IV Pearl gave him a bucket of powdered snow so she wouldn't succumb to the temptation of torturing her own soulmate, for example. Nobody is perfect, don't try to live up to an impossible standard.

The good thing about Tango saying all his insecurities aloud is that others can point out he's wrong, and Jimmy let's him know very clearly. Tango seems to be so surprised about it. He never considered his fears being wrong.

All things considered the Ranchers seem to handle the burned out ranch well. They're sad about it and Tango feels guilty, and that makes sense, but no anger or panic or deeply repressed feelings. Progress? Jimmy's comment about liking to wear the gloves is cute. Him not giving them back to Tango is also saying that Tango doesn't need to hide his claws, or himself. I thinks Tango is starting to understand that, even if he has trouble believing it. Same with all the players showing up, Tango sees that the truth about him hasn't scared them off.

I guess that there have been times that all the hiding was too overwhelming at times. Those probably moments Tango looked for Hels. If he was there wouldn't have to keep lying to his friends. He would have felt so much guilt, especially after learning that he had a counterpart that was probably trapped there. So it's a good thing it doesn't show up.

The similarities and differences between Patho and Etho explaining the portals stuff are fun. They have different experience with portals and different tools to work with, but they figured it out. And Patho isn't willing to give up one redstone ore block, while Etho is willing to get up and look for one with a friend.

Every time Tango mentions something about his past in Hels, Impulse seems to be in conflict to be a comforting presence or to be in righteous furry. It's hard to blame him. It's nice to see Impulse and Jimmy kind of team up to try to help Tango work trough everything.

I'm not sure how firewalls and whitelists work (or don't work) in combination with hacked portals. I'm also not sure how those exactly work. Then again, I know it's more important that they work than how they work. My brain just wants to understand it.

Tango, I get that you want to protect your friends but going into Hels alone isn't the solution. That way they at least get hurt by your actions and you actually encourage them to make unprepared, desperate attempts to get you back. If Tango had succeeded in breaking the portal, the Double Lifers would still try to follow. Since they know Bravo met Etho's counterpart, they would probably open a portal with his data. That would definitely have been interesting, but that would not have been good.

Thankfully, Jimmy is there to prevent all that. It's good to see that he stands his ground when Tango wants to cut others out, even though Jimmy has his own insecurities to deal with. And he already followed him to Hels, so of course Jimmy wouldn't think twice about following Tango into a trap.

Bravo has so many villainous vibes. It's a miracle he hasn't noticed it yet. He has figured out why they are here, but at the same time doesn't seem to realize they are here to help. And the hypocrite is calling Tango a monster for his temper, while he started the fight because of his anger. Bravo is a very good fighter, we've already seen, he's been in much tougher fights against much more experienced fighters. So it's not that surprising that the Ranchers lose.

Even after they lose Bravo keeps on hurting Tango with actions and words. It's no wonder that Tango realizes that the personality trait he hates so much about himself -a thing that makes him believe that he deserves all the bad stuff- is something he inherited from Bravo. It's something he only has because it comes from his 'better' counterpart. And that realisation gives him wat he needs to get through to Bravo.

Bravo's breakdown is beautiful to watch. You can see his whole beliefsystem falling apart and him having nothing to keep up his mental strength. It's so well written. For all the wrongs he's done, I never saw him as an evil person. Arrogant, biased and misguided, yes. Even so, he came to Hels with a strong sense of justice but he had to spend so much energy on just surviving that somewhere along the way he had to give it up. One can only have a survival mentality for so long before things have to give.

Tango understanding what Bravo must have been trough heartwarming. And I'm very much with him on this. Him embracing and accepting Bravo and Bravo finally accepting him is great. And now it's time for Bravo to begin his redemption arc. I absolutely love redemption arcs and -though I don't think Bravo's finished at the end of the story- this is a good one.

Timmy and Jimmy meeting each other is pretty much the opposite of Bravo and Tango meeting. No mistrust or hostility at all but mostly awe. It's nice how Tango describes it in his point of view. Timmy admitting he understand why he isn't good enough is just so sad. He knew Bravo couldn't fully accept him as he was, and he sees that his doppelgänger looks much better than him (rather objectively, being healthy beats being unkept and skin-over-bones). Jimmy basically goes all 'protective big brother' over Timmy, it's great. It's a relief that Bravo learned to (or at least started to) see Timmy as his own person.

The last scene of chapter X. It was so frustrating to wait to see wat happened next. Bravo seemed to be on Tango's side, so it would probably be a ruse. At the same time, it wouldn't have been the first time if Bravo had lost his temper and stopped being smart. I'm rather new in the fandom side of Minecraft Youtubers, so this was the first chapter I came across and the first time I had to wait for an update. I found it after someone reblogged some of Lunarcorwn's art (along with a tiny excerpt) about this chapter. I was immediately fascinated, and after the intro comic, I was sold.

The start of the next chapter doesn't give immediate resolution to a first time reader. Bravo is definitely convincing. He has to be, Atlas is not easily fooled. But knowing what's going on there seem to be small tells in how Bravo acts. Or maybe I'm just imagining things. Bravo's aggression looks like anger but is probably his newfound guilt and insecurity. He only talks to answer Atlas' questions, his speech seems more to the point while at the same time he uses more filler words.

It's interesting to see Bravo trying to trust Tango and Jimmy, while at the same time having learned to be distrustful of everything. He's really going back and forth between the two. Thankfully, Tango is understanding and shows him grace. Why does Bravo tense up when Tango mentions his friends won't attack on sight? Had he forgotten that overworld players don't tend to do that? It would probably be painful for him to realize there are things he has unlearned or forgotten.

Poor Timmy probably hasn't interacted with more that one person in ages. The Double Lifers must be very much overwhelming, especially since many of them aren't exactly low-energy players.

It's Tango's job to make sure his friends don't go with a bad -but easier- plan? Talk about role reversal.

The conversation between Bravo and Timmy by the portal is nice. I like whatever kind of relation they have, messy as it is. I'm not saying it's good, but it's interesting to read about. They each have many issues. Bravo is now aware of that, but I'm not sure if Timmy is. I'm not even sure Timmy knows what a healthy relationship looks like. They both care about each other and I think they could help each other out. But at the same time, Bravo has anger issues and biases against Hels players and hybrids and Timmy is both and probably wouldn't set any boundaries. At this moment them being together could either be healing or toxic. So I get Bravo's hesitance.

Jimmy's hostility towards Bravo is so odd to see. It's so unlike him, though it's fully earned. Tango and Bravo sharing their braincells while coming up with a plan is fun, especially since Tango has to tell his friends that every time that, yes, he is on board with what Bravo says.

I admire Tango's courtage to enact the plan. Then again it's in a way a variant on Tango's earlier plan to sacrifice himself, now it's only temporary. It's no wonder he looses his nerves and fully panics at the last moment when he is actually faced with the machine that caused most of his suffering. Once again: poor guy.

Bdubs has a point about Bravo calling others bad, but Patho literally disemboweled him so I think Bravo is being fair in his case. As for instinctSV, he barely appears in the story, so that's hard to say. But I don't think you get to lead a company in Hels by being trusting and charitable.

Grian and his Watcher abilities! This is a great moment to use his powers, especially since he so hesitant to use them. And he and Jimmy are right, this is not the moment to explain it all. This is the second time that Grian uses his silent 'Watcher voice' in a group meeting and this time there is an extra Listener around. Grian's secret is all but out.

Grian getting Mumbo to come with him with some crazy but true explanation somehow sounds like a very Grian thing to do. I love your portrayal of Mumbo. It's been a lot so it's no surprise that he needs a moment to wrap his head around it. Mumbo is a good friend, keeping how he helped/helps with Grian's eyes a secret. And Grian turned up on his redstone world? Wouldn't that be single-player? How did Grian manage that? And it's good to know that Grian told Mumbo what happend over time.

Something that stood out was that Mumbo stopped himself from tugging his mustache. The way it was worded was like a habit he tries to unlearn. It was also something Clear did but didn't seem to mind.

Tango finally understands he doesn't have to do this on his own and that he can rely on his friends. The warmth he has for the people around him here is so sweet. And he finally doesn't just want to confront his past, but actually wants to put it behind him. He still thinks that the "entire mess is solely his fault" (as if he asked for it) but he knows they will do whatever it takes to help him. "Is it really any wonder he learned how to be a good person just by knowing them?" Just beautiful! Though, is he seriously gonna give Jimmy a lecture about self-blame? That's just funny.

It's promising that Bravo corrects himself about the burned Ranch. Especially since nothing about it is even spoken out loud. He might have had a change of view, fully ingrained change requires more than that. But Bravo is willing to work on it. He does note himself that he wouldn't have been able to see Tango's influence on the interior.

It's entertaining to see how Bravo describes the Lifers, and Mumbo. The sentiment of wanting to kill Atlas is very understandable. Though Bravo is the Plan Guy, Jimmy is the leader here. He listens to Bravo because Bravo has the most expertise. But Jimmy is the one who the rest listens to, the one who keeps the conversation on track and the one who validates the plan.

Tango and Bravo realizing how much they both have changed due to were they have been living feels like something they needed. I like how they are now that they're not hostile towards each other. Bravo and Timmy's realisation neither of them is a builder is a fun parallel of Tango and Jimmy, and I'm glad Tango is there to watch it. It feels promising somehow.

Once again, Jimmy is being a leader here. Checking in, helping, dispelling fears. I highly doubt that Jimmy sees himself as a leader, though. The talk between Jimmy and Bravo is amazing. It just radiates growth and caring.

Tango in the farm. Oof. It's amazing how he is so close to drowning in despair, but still manages to find something to hold on to. And then he realizes he was strong enough to survive it all before, and that he is stronger now. It's wonderful how he let his good memories strengthen him, and that while he is currently living through his worst nightmare.

Clear not realizing Hels Tek is being invaded and said invaders being fine with Clear just continuing to do his own thing is really amusing. Clear 'recognizing' Grian is so sad. But Grian doesn't seem to have the instinctive recognition of his counterparts name, and later when said counterpart realizes Grians name, it's not his player name. That's interesting. I appreciate that Grian stays with Clear and I wonder what is said between them off screen. I hope Clear eventually realizes Grian is not Scáil.

The invasion of Hels Tak is a fun read. Overpowering the first guard went so smooth! Then the ravager just had to shake things up. It's nice that during everything, Pearl and Scott seem to have patched things up and are flawlessly working together now. Jimmy seems to notice a 'intrusive thought' cutting another off, noticing how odd that is, even if he doesn't understand wat it means. Bravo and Jimmy fighting in sync is awesome! What's also a difference between this fight and the previous is that Jimmy uses his wings while fighting. Something that wouldn't be fair in a friendly fight. Tango notices later that he fights way better when he does use his non-human-side, for Jimmy it might be the same.

It's so nice that Jimmy notices that Tango lost the fear he always carried with him. He handled the last hours in the farm well. The first time I read this part I was so worried that there wasn't any mention of breaking the respawn anchor. I couldn't imagine that they would forget while standing right in front of it. Luckily there was no need for a respawn. I had also been a little nervous about Timmy and Bravo, had they made sure they would respawn at Double Life if their spawn point got reset? (Is that even possible for Timmy with his Hells-comm?)

Sweet Jimmy does not tolerate his boyfriend being name-called. And sweet Tango won't stand for his boyfriend being hurt. They're cute like that. It's good to see that Tango being called a monster has lost its power to hurt him, no matter how hard Atlas tries. He's finally able to fully accept his mob-side. It feels good that the three of them manage to piss of Atlas so much that he finally cracks, giving Tango the closure he needs. And then what's probably the most satisfying punch in Hels' history, even inflecting permanent damage.

This is the first time Tango consciously reached out for his own fire, isn't it? His own firestorm is a beautiful thing. And powerful. I'm so happy for Tango! Atlas having to helplessly watch how Tango casually strolls to the portal is extra satisfying.

Atlas just sitting outside and letting his laboratory burn really shows how defeated he is. If he was any other person I would probably feel sorry for him. And why is he so surprised that Tango and Bravo are the ones that beat him? They're both smart people that know how he works and with plenty of reasons to hate him. Are they really that unlikely to bring him down? Or did he underestimate them because they don't have the authority to boss others around? Good thing Tango had his friends on his side and that Bravo understood the power of friendship.

And then bX has the pleasure of kicking Atlas while he's down. Must have been a great relief too, to let the hybrid-farmer know his life's work was done for.

Even for the Hermits that had known something was 'off' about Tango, finally hearing what happened must have been a shock, for the ones that didn't know yet. And for Tango it must be nice to be able to tell it on his own terms, this time. He probably knew by now that the Hermits wouldn't abandon him after telling the truth, but having conformation must still feel great. It's also great that talking about it is becoming easier.

Alisker and xB are very sweet together. Very different from how they interact with other people. I admire Alisker's long term plan and how successfully it played out. He really made sure Atlas' damage stayed limited. I just wish his plans hadn't required for Tango to be locked in the farm in the first place.

I think it's a wise choice for Bravo to take some time for himself. Processing and healing from everything that happened can be nasty, and at those times it's nice not needing to mindful of others. At the same time, part of me is worried he's gonna overcorrect himself or close himself off. I'm not sure how excluded different worlds are, and how much contact players can have through the multi-net, but I hope that Bravo stays in contact with at least Timmy. It's sweet that Bravo clearly cares about Timmy's progress as well and that he regrets they both have to take different roads to heal.

The progress Timmy has already made is wonderful to see. Not only physically, he questions Bravo's decision to go and voices his discontent. Gently, but still. It feels like he's learning how to stand up for himself. Timmy himself really wanting to grow as a person is very promising, especially as someone who represents his counterparts (*checks external authors posts*) passiveness and victimhood.

Dbubs first appearance in the main story! His and Patho's relationship is both so warm and unhealty. I love complex people and I love complex people being even more complex together, and this story is full of them! I also love it every time when players are having that instinctual recognition at the proof of existence of their counterpart on page, whether is just the name or meeting face to face.

I wonder why exactly Patho wants to leave. It's not he didn't know about them having counterparts. Why does it suddenly matter? Is it because they visited Hells? Because they visited Hells together? Because of the recognition Patho felt? Or is it something else?

False, seriously? I don't think having someone chained up like an animal is keeping you in Tango's good graces. And you basically told him it could wait until he got back, while you're holding your twin prisoner! There might be something wrong with Sym, but what's wrong with you? It sounds like an interesting story, and I definitely have questions.

Poor Scáil. His suffering might actually surpass that of Tango in the farm. And if he's been like this since he left Hels Tek, it's been more than a decade, considering they never met. How did he become like this? I know it's related to Grian almost becoming a (full) Watcher, but this can't be how this is supposed to go. And even Grian has control of his abilities. Scáil using Grian's Watcher name makes me wonder how how much player vs Watches they actually are. Grian, please check in on your counterpart.

Stress' way of talking is always fun. Her and Doc's origin is cool. And I'm curious what your interpretation of the Hivemind is. Doc not having a Hels is a big relief, considering Doc himself already loves creating game-breaking machines. That trait would be terrifying on someone with a Hels mentality, let alone an amplified version of that trait. I understand why they are conflicted about it, though.

I'm glad we finally see Instinct in person. I like him and the vibe he gives off. Atlas working for him is amazing, how far he has fallen! I hope Instinct enjoys bossing him around.

Tango making the video about Hels and how to get there surprised me when I first read it, even though it makes sense. A lot of Hels players will probably change for the better because of it. It might also wreck the Hels economy. Overworld players could give their counterparts a way out, or provide them with resources that are easy to get in a normal world.

I have so many questions about it all. Can mobs travel through portals? How would it work when someone creates a portal in a creative world? Could they just spawn in rare items (elytra's or even things like spawn eggs) and bring them to Hels? Can counterparts create hacked portals when both of them are at different places in Hels? If so, that would create fast-travel. That would be especially valuable in such a giant world.

It would probably kind of sting for Bravo to see the video. Everything he needed to know and took him a decade to figure out, quickly explained in one video, uploaded not long after he finally escaped. Not that I think he woud disagree with uploading it, it's just, where was that when he needed it?

The idea of Bravo seeing Tango's video is interesting. Bravo could see all the videos Tango made while he was trapped in Hels. All the inventions and games (first Decked Out) that Tango created, all the projects he worked on with other Hermits. Tango could see the ones that Bravo made before they switched places. He could see how Bravo acted before Hels crushed him, the friends he had back in the day and how young he was when he got trapped. I wonder if they do that, and how it influences how they see each other.

It's very nice how you worked Steve, Herobrine and Alex in this universe. Does the Hels firewall being down also mean that overworld comms now work there properly? Herobrine being Hels former admin makes sense, as the first counterpart, though I hadn't expected it. It's nice that there won't be new player condemned to spawning in Hels.

The scene with Jimmy and Tango is just lovely. The cuffs and everything they stood for were so loaded for Tango. I'm glad he's finally able to take them off, and that Jimmy understood how much it meant for his soulmate.

I love how the last paragraph is inspired by the end credits poem. And I love how it both does and does not breaks the forth wall, and the things it explains. It's a nice touch that it's in-story explained by Aqua and Lunar.

-----

And that was it. For the main story anyway. I've also read the short stories from the Hels To Pay universe, but I leave that for another time. Maybe. I liked writing this but I've had enough for now. If you actually read all of this, you have my uttermost respect.

[unquietspiritao3]

musings on rpf

Been thinking a lot about RPF since the CoC3 outtakes. I think because it’s brought me a very small bit of exposure with people who aren’t familiar with the concept, and I also know from talking to friends that for many of them, Taskmaster is their first RPF fandom.

There are a lot of misconceptions about RPF and people who write it, and there’s both healthy and unhealthy ways to approach it. All this stuff that I, as a Fandom Old and veteran RPF writer, know and take for granted, but that other people may not have worked out yet. So I thought I should write some of it out explicitly, as best I can.

(And, too, part of this is me thinking, What would I want to convey if someone who inspired one of my stories reached out to me for a direct conversation about it? Not that I think that would ever or should ever happen, but it’s hard not to think about when you’ve had an experience like this.)

The biggest misconception is that RPF comes from unhealthy parasocial relationships. (I’m specifying ‘unhealthy’ because there are actually healthy ways to have a parasocial relationship, and nearly everyone has at least one. Other people have written about this in more detail here and here.) I’m not denying that in some cases, this misconception could be true, but by and large, the circle containing the fans who have an unhealthy parasocial relationship with a celebrity and the circle containing the fans who write RPF about said celebrity are a Venn diagram without much overlap. By and large, RPF writers are not delusional. By and large, we are incredibly aware of the difference between the real person and the character we’re writing, and we do not want to violate that real person’s boundaries. (If they want to go to AO3 and read fic titles and summaries—and perhaps more—then that’s their choice, of course.)

Taking myself as an example, I’ve talked here before about how I jumped into writing in the Taskmaster fandom with a very basic knowledge of the comics’ lives off-screen. I don’t feel particularly attached to any of them. I don’t feel like I know them. Even with James Acaster, whom I know the most about (the majority of it learned after I started writing!) and whom I relate to the most, I don’t imagine that we could be ‘friends’ or whatever if we met. In fact, I sometimes suspect I wouldn’t like him much if I knew him in real life. That’s not what this is about.

Another misconception is that all RPF is porn. Okay, yes, almost all of my Taskmaster fic is rated Explicit, and a lot of it is kinky porn. But there is a reason for that, which I’ll get to at the end of this little essay. Also, yes, Taskmaster RPF in general is extremely kinky, but I don’t think anyone can seriously argue that we are projecting that energy onto an entirely sweet, innocent, wholesome show. Anyway, the point is, there’s plenty of non-explicit RPF. Including most of what I wrote before Taskmaster. That’s not what this is about, either.

What is it about, then? For me, ultimately, it’s about the same thing any creative project you make and put out into the world is about. It’s saying, “Here’s something of me. Do you relate to it?”

The celebrity it’s based on only provides a germ of inspiration, taken from something in their public persona which I relate to. To fill out the character, I water that little seed with things from my own life or simply musings on human nature, and then I put that character in a situation I find interesting and see what grows. Keeping the name/likeness/biographical details (to an extent) of the celebrity is simply a shortcut to finding the other people who might relate when I put it out in the world.

You see, my goal for my RPF is not to have the celebrity read it. If they’re going to be bothered by it, I hope they don’t read it. I certainly don’t want anyone sending it to them or anything like that. While it was hilarious for Alex to say what he did, and it’s been a positive experience overall, I never expected or wished for it to happen.

My goal, especially with explicit and kinky porn like ‘A big boy like you’, is to let my readers know, If you see yourself in this, it’s okay. There’s nothing wrong with you. And to get that same feedback in return.

[homestuckreplay]

Homestuck Is A Game, Who Is The Player?

Week 3 Retrospective

'Video games have long been associated with spectatorship as well as play, from their origins in quarter-fueled arcades, where high score displays implied the presence of admiring or competitive spectators, to their migration to home screens and consoles. Live streaming chat emulates these older models, but its interaction with economies of scale on streaming platforms brings a different kind of intimacy and intensity to the experience. Chat lets spectators feel like they are there with the streamer as well as a part of a crowd, even if they are alone in their room.' [Jeremy Antley - emphasis mine]

From Homestuck’s very first page, the comic has made something clear. We are not allowed to immerse ourselves in John Egbert’s world. There is a layer of separation between us, an interface mediating our access to his life and story, a voiceover narration from the person who’s really in control. Who is this person, and what form does their control over John take?

Homestuck is presented like a video game, yet unlike a video game, we don’t control the character’s movements with arrow keys or have the chance to type our own commands directly into the text box. Instead of being able to explore the game on our own terms, we are confined to a specific and predetermined route, even though others seem theoretically possible. Simply put, we are not the ones playing the game.

Essay continued under the cut - about 2.6k words

I think there are two really important questions to consider when analyzing the meta elements of Homestuck and treating it as a game. The first - what kind of game is it? The second - where exactly do we stand in relation to the player(s)?

The most obvious answer to question one is ‘Homestuck is a text based adventure game.’ This guide to text based adventures is a great overview, and we can map the example commands here onto commands we’ve seen in Homestuck. ‘Examine room’ (p.4) is a one-word action, ‘Captchalogue smoke pellets’ (p.9) is an action and direct object, and ‘Nail poster to wall’ (p.19) includes the indirect object. John hasn’t given any orders yet - he’s too nice a guy for that - but ‘Report progress to TG’ (p.39) is definitely communicating with another character. All of these, and most other command lines, feel like reasonable instructions that could be recognized by a game.

However, commands like ‘Fondly regard cremation’ (p.52) and ‘Play haunting piano refrain’ (p.77) honestly feel too characterful to be fully interpreted by a computer, and ‘Squawk like an imbecile and shit on your desk’ (p.16) is… well, I tried typing this into the command prompt for the classic text adventure Zork, and got the following response.

A text adventure is just not set up to interpret wacky, left field ideas, much less respond to them in an entertaining way. And we know there is a real person behind Homestuck doing exactly that.

If my party enters the wizard’s study in Dungeons & Dragons 4th Edition, and I tell the Dungeon Master that I squawk like an imbecile and sit on the wizard’s desk, that statement will be understood. Sure, the DM will probably call me an idiot and put a nasty spike trap on the desk, but what I said will become part of the story in the way that a nonsense command in a text based video game never can. It’s interesting to think of Homestuck as a tabletop roleplaying game, where the narrator is the Game Master, the command prompt is a player, and John is a player character (presumably TT, TG and GG are the rest of his party and they’re just really late to the session).

Homestuck isn’t just text based, though - it has a strong visual element, including interfaces and overlays where the player can click and drag items between John’s inventory and his environment, or around his space. This suggests it could also be a point and click adventure game, a genre that grew out of text based games as graphics improved, and is defined by a strong inventory management component (check), puzzle solving quests (check - we’ve recently solved our first quest of acquiring the Sburb Beta) and dialog trees (????). The sprite based, isometric art style is really good for getting an overview of the space and seeing possible interactable objects, and Homestuck does feature extended dialog sequences - we don’t know if there are other possible inputs from John, but it's interesting to think that there might be.

These three genres - text based adventures, point and click adventures, and tabletop roleplaying games - all developed throughout the 1970s and 80s. It’s reasonable that Andrew Hussie (born 1979) could have grown up with some of these games. But to answer the second question, ‘where do we stand in relation to the player’, we might need to look at media forms still in their infancy - let’s plays, livestreams, and actual play.

[Michael Sawyer, 2004]

In the past few years, ‘Let’s Play [Game]’ has become a relatively popular thread format on the Something Awful forums, as well as personal websites. This began with posters taking screenshots of their playthroughs of a game and adding commentary in the text. The medium has now advanced to video and is typically hosted on YouTube, with commentary overlaid. Either format gives a creator the space to play through as much of the game as they choose, and then edit exactly what content they want to show to the audience, providing commentary after the fact. 

Homestuck, with its per-page illustrations, could be seen as a long thread of forum posts by the player, each including screenshots as they move through the game. The inclusion of short Flash animations shows the edge into video, and makes me wonder if we’ll see longer or more complex videos, perhaps with voiceover narration, as Homestuck expands its focus. The self-referential and aggressive yet helpful commentary in Homestuck is similar in tone to Sawyer's playthrough above, and could easily be the work of a player who knows where the story will go, at least in the short term, and is dropping hints to the audience while purposefully concealing some things.

Livestreaming video games is a similar concept to Let's Plays, but performed in real time. Often hosted on Justin.tv, an open video broadcast website that’s been gaining prominence in the past couple of years, a livestream is an improvised and unedited way to watch someone game. Any commentary from the creator happens without knowledge of how the playthrough will turn out. Homestuck, by Hussie’s own admission, is being written similarly in real life - they don’t know more than the broad strokes of how the story will go, and it’s possible that neither the author nor the narrator knows the long term implications of an action such as John stealing his dad’s PDA. 

Livestreams open the possibility for viewers to influence game events, if the streamer listens to their audience. We know this is true in Homestuck - readers are able to submit commands, and some are chosen for the story. The real time nature of Homestuck, waiting each day for the new update, is equivalent to waiting for a streamer to come online and start playing again so we can find out where their game goes next. This is compounded by us having no access to Homestuck outside of the streamer - we cannot buy and play this game for ourselves, it’s still in some kind of early or limited access, and the streamer controls all our knowledge. 

The livestream is definitely most similar to how Homestuck is made by its author, but it's hard to say whether its narrator is commentating in real time, or after the fact. I can't find any definite clues in our pages so far - I think the narrator wants to seem smart and superior, but I can't say whether they have the knowledge to back it up.

[img source]

Our final media format is known as Actual Play. Almost a year ago, the creators of Penny Arcade (along with Dungeons & Dragons game designer Chris Perkins) began releasing Acquisitions Incorporated, a short-run, officially licensed podcast where the group plays through a D&D adventure to demonstrate gameplay interspersed with jokes. This isn’t the first time a TTRPG publisher has recorded sessions to help people learn the game, but this idea seems to be crossing over into the entertainment genre - and webcomics are part of that movement.

In the first episode, the group have a brief aside. The DM says that ‘some players prefer to refer to their characters in the third person… others prefer to get into the first,’ and one player says they’ve observed the same thing in World of Warcraft. What’s not explicitly said is that the Game Master typically refers to the player characters in second person, describing what happens to ‘you’ and what ‘you’ see - much like streamers talking to their chat. The blocks of narrative text below pictures in Homestuck could easily be a Game Master balancing giving information to an unruly player, and providing entertainment for the audience. John’s lucky or unlucky moments with his sylladex could be the result of particularly good or bad dice rolls from his unseen player.

Actual play is a really great format for deep diving into a small cast of characters, and exploring their emotional state in ways that aren't intrinsic to a lot of video games. As we're already seeing the beginnings of John's emotional arc, we know this will be a focus, but we need two to four more characters with equally large roles in the story to really form a TTRPG party. Actual play also tends to include a lot of combat and its mechanics. We know Homestuck can handle crunchy mechanics due to the sylladex, but I'd expect to see the Strife concept become just as in depth and central to the story if Homestuck ends up fitting into this mold.

All three of these formats can have a mass audience, just like Homestuck does in reality - but Homestuck also feels like a very personal experience. Two people playing the same video game, even a highly linear game such as Portal or one that doesn’t involve much active interaction such as a visual novel, have slightly different gameplay based on the speed they move through the story and their missteps on the way to finding the solution to a puzzle. 

Similarly, my experience of Homestuck is different from yours. I read the new update every day, while I know some people wait for a few days of updates to build up and then read a larger chunk. Maybe I clicked ‘Aggrieve’ and ‘Abjure’ three times each on p.90, alternating the options, while you clicked ‘Aggrieve’ five times in sequence and then ‘Abjure’ only twice. Maybe I didn’t realize p.110 had an interactive element at first, and skipped over it until somebody pointed it out to me (really telling on myself here). These elements of Homestuck that we have direct control over are currently only a small part of the story, but they do exist.

In this way, Homestuck feels a little bit like sitting in the living room as a kid watching your older brother play a game, begging him to let you take over for a minute, occasionally doing so until he gets frustrated with your inability to Strife and takes the controller back. The nostalgia of the simplistic graphics and the 70s and 80s games that are being evoked only adds to this cozy feeling. If Homestuck starts to add more interactive elements, such as branching paths, opportunities for us to take over the cursor, or a chance for us to use John’s sylladex ourselves and choose what he picks up, it might be worth thinking of Homestuck as different iterations of the same game, each of us watching our own, slightly different player, and even co-playing with them.

So, who IS this narrator? In my mind, I’m trying to draw a clear distinction between the author and the narrator. Hussie is the author in the real world, and the narrator, or player, or GM, exists within the work. Their role is best described on page 82:

‘The game presently eluding you is only the latest sleight of hand in the repertoire of an unseen riddler, one to engender a sense not of mirth, but of lack. His coarse schemes are those less of a prankster than a common pickpocket. His riddle is Absence itself.’

The narrator is this unseen riddler (or perhaps unseenRiddler?), providing a secondary layer of control over what happens and what we are able to see. They’re the person clicking and dragging objects around John’s room, and choosing what actions to take next. The narration is their perspective on the game - whether we see this as a GM describing a scene to their players, or a streamer reading aloud information that the game has given them and providing their own commentary. 

So, we're watching the narrator play Homestuck, in whatever form it takes - but there's another layer to this. On page 22, an equivalence is made between the Sburb Beta, which John was supposed to receive on April 10 (and finally acquired on April 13 in-story, p.100), and the Homestuck Beta, which launched to us on April 10, but was quickly canceled and replaced with Homestuck proper on April 13. The Homestuck beta is linked within the comic, and might be canon within it - the narrator making an initial run at the game before restarting their save (perhaps on a different computer or console?) and trying again. Homestuck the game is currently about a kid who lives in the suburbs - and if the name and logo are anything to go by, Sburb could also be a suburbs-themed game. While we watch the riddler play Homestuck, the riddler will be watching John play the game Sburb. How deep does this go? Are there more layers inwards or outwards?

I’ve been puzzling this over for days, and I’m definitely left with more questions than I can answer. Here are the ones I'm focused on:

Is the unseen riddler playing the game as intended? Now that they’ve passed the tutorial, are they keeping the game on the rails and trying their best to follow a linear story, or are they pushing the boundaries, going for some kind of pacifist or resource-stripped run, trying to interfere with John’s intended story? Have they played the game before, and if so, how does this affect their gameplay?

If the unseen riddler is a character within the story, distinct from the external author, are we the true audience? Will there be an audience within the story, or perhaps other players? If so, how big will it be? What kind of reach does Homestuck the game have, and how many people are playing it or tuning in to watch?

How permeable are the boundaries? Is John simply pixels on a screen for the unseen riddler to play with, with no agency of his own outside of the riddler’s interpretation, like if we were playing The Sims? Or is it possible for the riddler to enter the game, or for John to leave it, and the two of them to communicate directly? Or a middle ground - something like ‘character bleed’ in TTRPGs, where a player embodies a character for so long that despite their not being real, they come to influence each other even outside of gameplay?

What the hell is the Midnight Crew? Is this a different game that exists separately to Homestuck? Will our riddler, or a different one, eventually play it? If we have three games - Homestuck, Midnight Crew, and Sburb - what exactly is the relationship between them, and how interrelated are they?

This is a lot of thoughts for what is, at time of writing, is 125 pages of comedy webcomic. But the story is just beginning, and we’ve been told it’s going to be a long day. Anything could be important, and with the frequent in-text nods to the meta elements - ‘examine third and fourth walls of room’ (p.61), ‘you decide it’s time for less meta, and more beta’ (p.113), the title appearing in the clouds on p.82 that John may or may not be able to see, the integration of the physical captchalogue card into the sylladex interface on p.98 - I don’t want to draw any firm boundaries, or make any assumptions about what is and what isn’t part of the story. Instead, I’ve cataloged the meta elements of Homestuck that might be worth paying attention to as we move through the comic, to develop a more concrete theory in time.

[atomicpizza64]

Yet another 50 villains for Lorch!

I’ll try and stick the major spoilers for Urasawa’s Pluto, Persona 5 and Watchmen under the cut. It might not work, and there is still spoilers for various other media, so beware!

Debatable for some but I don’t care. I will try and explain some reasons why they aren’t totally bad, and I’ll keep adding to it as I’m not sure it’s 50 yet

Mr Nobody (Doom Patrol): Your honour, he’s just a goofy guy! Hasn’t actually done too bad (at least in the comics), he’s just following Dadaist principles

Rhorchac (Watchmen): messed up childhood lead to screwed morality but he still has moments of mercy, attempts to fight evildoers

Gideon Gleeful: kinda just a kid raised in a cult who let attention go drastically to his head

Roxie Richter: (Scott Pilgrim, mostly Takes Off): enraged by Ramona abandoning her, takes it too far but got over it after a heart to heart

Darth Vader: Took his grief extremely far, destroys a greater evil at the cost of his life

Harry Lime (the third man): it’s mostly just charisma. Pretty nice to Holly… but may have killed a bunch of kids.

Dr Frankenfurter (RHPS): YOUR HONOUR HE IS JUST A GOOFY GUY

Plankton: completely ineffectual.

Father (C:KND): repeats the chain of harm caused by his own dad

Gladion (Pokémon): joins team Skull to rebel against his abusive mother

Guzma (Pokémon): forms team skull to vent dissatisfaction with the trial system and support loners, implied to have gifted kid burnout and an abusive parent (at his parent’s house on Melemele island, there is a bunch of golf clubs that are described as “broken and bent” 😬)

Asgore: Tries to kill Frisk but only to save his beloved kingdom and its innocent inhabitants

Oersted (live a live): desperately trying to repent. I’m not too familiar with his game tho

Badeline (Celeste): a manifestation of anxiety

The time Empress (Cris Tales): sort of sacrifice a few to save all motivations

Spamton: ineffectual, ostracised and betrayed by a partner

Eldegard: idk if I can summarise it here

Bowser: flips from game to game, sorta falls under goofy guy

Alice Hiiragashi (P5S): bullied relentlessly in high school, tries to be bigger than she actually is

The Enchantress (Shovel Knight) possessed version of your partner

Kokushibo (Demon Slayer): always felt massively inferior to his brother

Akaza (Demon Slayer): lost his adoptive family

Shadow the Hedgehog: lost his best friend

The narrator (Stanley Parable): ends up stuck in a horrific time loop, has moments of kindness

Pikmin Louie: sorta just acting based on bad social skills

Catra: scarred child stuck in a war manipulated by parental figures

The collector (owl house): scarred child in a war manipulated by a parental figure

King Andrias (Amphibia): desperately tries to atone, manipulated by his dad and the core

Pink (The Wall): suffered bullying at school, absent dad, smothering parent and a cheating spouse

Spinel (SU): abandoned by her only friend for hundreds of years

Vace (I was a teen exocolonist): young kid with no real anger outlet

Norman Bates (Psycho): unable to get any help he desperately needs due to the time period

Mr Burns (the Simpsons): often completely ineffectual, moments of kindness

Jack Torrance (the shining, mostly the book): manipulated, attempts to make right but fails

Frank Butterman (Hot Fuzz): only doing what he does out of a misguided desire to make the town he loves absolutely perfect

Winslow Leach (Phantom of the Paradise): taken advantage of and had his life’s work stolen

Zuko: scarred child in a war manipulated by a parent

Jessie and James: two kids from different kinda messed up backgrounds that want to rebel; also very ineffectual

Hans Beckert (M): unable to get the help he needs due to time period

Tetsuo (Akira): teenager who needs an anger outlet; the main reason he was chosen for the experiments was by chance, so Kaneda is aware of his status as a foil; has no control over his powers

Nox (Wakfu): will do anything to archive the goal of reunification with his family

Toga (MHA): ostracised and turned to villainy due to the gory nature of her powers, doomed yuri

Ice King (Adventure Time): ineffectual; lost his mind and has no idea what happened

Sy (1 hour photo): desperately lonely, implied to have been driven to join the perfect family due to childhood trauma

Croix (Little Witch Academia): slipped into darkness due to jealousy, sorta repents

Alma Madrigal (Encanto): went through the war and the death of her husband, just doesn’t really know how damaging she can be

Seymour Krelborne (LSOH): a meek guy who found himself in a position of control and desperately tries to hang onto it

The Kid (Blood Meridian): genuinely tries to be a better person at the end

All of the gang (IASIP): almost everyone had a terrible childhood and show prominent moments of kindness

Uncle Deadly (The Muppets): haunts the theatre, but was straight up murdered by his own critics

Hal 9000 (2001): doesn’t have much control of his actions, as it is the result of a coding paradox

the iron man (Black Sabbath): mistreated by society before a “then let me be evil” realisation

Q (ST:TNG): silly guy, somewhat of a trickster mentor, in the way he gives lessons for the crew, even if 18 people died that one time

get rekt

PLUS: Takuto Maruki: he just really doesn’t want what happened to his partner to happen to anyone else, even if the world stagnates

Goro Akechi: young kid manipulated by an abusive parent

Ozymandias (Watchmen): does potentially halt the end of the world, but at the cost of numerous lives

Goji (Pluto): witnesses the death of his family firsthand

Sahad/Pluto: scared kid manipulated by a parental figure, abeit after a war this time

[unscrupulousartist]

Kickstarter Update #2

Cross-posted from Kickstarter:

A few things I'm looking forward to in October...

Hullo, hullo! Welcome to Update #2.

First and foremost, thank you to everyone who's supported my campaign so far. :) This first week I was hit by an influx of spam marketers and questionable conversations that, while a shitty achievement badge in general, I was unprepared for emotionally; but each and every one of you has been a reminder that there are real people out there who want to support real art.

Speaking of supporting real art... there are some exciting things coming up in October that I'm looking forward to supporting in my life, and perhaps it'll be stuff you'd want to support, too.

IN CHRONOLOGICAL ORDER 

October 15th—Confluence ft. Publishing Goblin | @publishinggoblin

Confluence is on my radar because of my low-key obsession with Publishing Goblin—'cause come on, how great of a name is that? I've supported previous Publishing Goblin projects and will likely support more of their projects in the future. Publishing Goblin brought me The Alleyman Tarot, will eventually bring me The Hot Housewife Tarot, and has been steadily working through several poetry projects. As a bit of a goblin myself, I've got a starry eyed vested interest in seeing another cool creative make art and succeed in this world; for it's art that makes the rest of it worth living.

Confluence has beautiful artwork, a trusted artist working with a diverse team, and is a perfect excuse to throw dice into trays and laugh with friends. Full disclosure: this is likely to be a nice little gift for my TTRPG loving step-son, and we'll see about bullying him into running a little campaign for me and his dad. 

October 22nd—A Fool's Errand by J Strautman | @strautmaskreplica & B Marsollier | @b-marsollier

In other TTRPG news, your friends and mine over at Planet Arcana have designed their own tarot-based system.  A Fool's Errand puts your party into the world of Planet Arcana, with it's lavish landscapes, brilliant beasts, and arcane insight. You don't need to be familiar with the podcast to enjoy the game; but if you're looking for an award-winning group of Canadians playing through a unique Tarot-Inspired universe, it's definitely worth a listen. 

Playtesting our own little calamity has been a highlight of my still-very-novice RPG experiences. I get to live out my piscean fantasties as an angry waterbreathing aquean composite, and weave a tale of prophet and mystery with some storytelling friends. We're only a few sessions into our campaign, but it promises to be a fun experience. 

Sometime in October, Probably—Refugium by Simon Roy | @simon-roy

And I would be remiss not to include my favourite comics on my list. Refugium is the third book in Simon Roy's Griz Grobus series, following the eponymous first book Griz Grobus and the second, Miramar. Simon's a fantastically detailed comic artist and works with a wonderful colourist, Sergey Nazarov, to bring this galaxy-spanning universe to life. It's already funded, but you can buy the backlog or support Simon on Patreon while you wait for whatever he makes next. I'm trying to be patient while I wait for my copy of Refugium to arrive—hopefully sometime this month.   

Can you think of anything else exciting happening this month? Let me know. :) I always like finding new artists to swoon over. 

Stay Rested, Audrey

[stars-in-a-jam-jar]

Thinking about how I developed an Immediate attachment to Damian Wayne the second I learned he existed. Not even the second I saw him, the second I heard his name in a YouTube video about those animated movies he's part of, something in me went 'We are going to make liking this boy the newest facet of our personality' and that was when I was like *15 years old*. I've never actually directly read any of the comics he appears in because accessing them required (in order) money I didn't have, library locations I didn't have access to, piracy skills I had too much on my plate to acquire, and more energy to go further out of my way than my ADHD would allow me. So instead I simply kept up with my boy from afar.

My image of him is both so clear and probably So Far Off Base.

He is haughty and entitled. Because he is Ten Years Old and raised to believe if he was mean and deadly enough he could do whatever he wanted forever. Because his existence was functionally an experiment to see How Powerful Of A Being Batman's genetics could create and now he is obsessed with his own bloodline and birthright in a way No Healthy Person Is. Because in all the ways that matter to him, he has succeeded through Raw Stubborn Determination up until he is confronted with the fact that he cannot please his father while staying this way.

And isn't every child entitled to their father's love? So why does his father disapprove of him so much? Why does he treat these other people like family when Damian is his real family? Why does he work with them so closely but tell Damian to step back and follow orders? Damian is better than all of them in all the ways that matter most, obviously! He's earned his father's love and he should have it by default anyway!

But Damian doesn't know what love looks like. He knows what expectations and tests and goals and master plans look like. When you love someone you watch over them and notice things about them, but the only thing he was ever watched for, the only thing that was noticed about him all 6-to-10 years of his life was his ability to dispense death and navigate mortal peril and rigid high-control-group power structures. He doesn't know, he doesn't know how loved he is when Bruce tells him to put the blades away, to reel himself in, to not commit murders, to go to bed on time. How easily and automatically his father looks at him and sees a child in his care. Because to Damian, 'child' is a demeaning powerless role that only applied to him for as long as he had yet to grasp the mechanics of walking.

He doesn't realize how lonely and starved for affection he is. His slowness to believe in others and his overly formal abrasive speech speak to someone so unsocialized with anyone it'd be appropriate for him to socialize with that nothing short of Multiple Years Of De-Conditioning could possibly get him to a place where he can comfortably exist in a casual, gentle setting.

And then his dad Fucking Dies (this is comics and also It's Fucking Batman so obviously he gets better, But Like Still) and he has to orient his life around one of the people he started this whole journey territorially attacking for daring to think he had a comparable place in the heart of Damian's father just because he came into Bruce's life first. He becomes Dick Grayson's Robin, and suddenly everything about the way he's been operating gets shuffled and shaken and crackled into a shape that looks like a properly heroic young man. He connects to Dick in a way he's never connected with another person, he doesn't just feel a sense of 'Yes, this is The Correct Way Of Going About Things', he feels comfortable and like he's part of a team and not a Power Structure.

Has anyone else seen this? Do they touch on this Even A Little in the comics? All I know is the broad strokes and yet I Am Obsessed With This Boy. He's lifted from the original context of his life into the role of 'Batman's youngest son' and is floundering for a place in this family, but he doesn't understand that 'love' and 'family' and 'power structures' are not synonymous words. He is trying! He's trying to prove he's so cool and competent and valuable and why does everyone keep treating him like one of the least competent forms of person??? He's not a child, he's Damian Wayne Al-Guhl. He takes the mantle of Robin for himself because he refuses the idea that he should be asking permission, because to ask is an admission that not everything is meant for him all the time.

I'm so sleepy I wanna say more but I've already written so much about a character who I've only directly experienced in Wildly Inconsistent Forms.

I just like Damian Wayne a bunch, he's my blorbo.

[amyisherenowitsokay]

I was wondering if you've seen MatPats Film Theory on Invader Zim? And if you have, what your thoughts were on the conclusion?

Okay so since I'm sick I finally got around to watching this video to fulfill this ask.

TLDR for the people who don't want to watch the video below the cut.

TLDR: the theory is that Professor Membrane is an Irken, based off of his lack of ears, goggles that hide is eyes, complete lack of mention of who Dib and Gaz's mother is, his random advanced technology, etc. It would also be an interesting self-folly for Dib, who's made it his life mission to seek out the paranormal, never realizing he is in himself a paranormal entity. There's also some hints that while Dib is oblivious, Gaz might know ("I have a squeedily-spooch" quote), and her acceptance/knowledge is why she's Membrane's favorite kid.

Onto my answer:

I can definitely appreciate the thought that went into this video. I'm a big fan of fan interpretations and secret messages. The Invader Zim lore is so open-ended in a lot of areas, leaving hints about character personalities and motivations all over, it's real fun. That being said, I have to firmly disagree with MatPat's conclusion (with the disclaimer of: to each your own fanfictions).

I think the reason we just can't see Membrane's ears are because they're just under his goggles.

I think this is a pretty good angle to emphasize that the goggles don't go OVER his ears, but under. I actually have a facemask that does that, as it's more comfortable than something going over your ears for hours. The heavier duty safety goggles also have thick ass bands. I think Jhonen and the art team just took insp from that and upgraded it to look futuristic, to where they cover his ears.

Another reason I disagree:

Membrane had a childhood. (The comics also show him with his parents, but I'll stick to strictly show material, since a lot of the comics are not canon). Yes, it could be argued that this was just a younger Professor Membrane, when he was still short. However, I think the childhood wonder of still believing in Santa Clause, even as a super-genius, is more pro-human than pro-secret-Irken. Zim studied Christmas, whereas Professor Membrane experienced Christmas, if that makes sense.

To explain his kids, I do think Dib and Gaz were clones. I subscribe fully to the theory that the Membrane also told them already, way younger than was probably appropriate lol. I think if they didn't know for sure where they came from, they'd both have way more questions on the regular about their theoretical mom.

As funny and interesting as it'd be to have Dib be chasing proof of, well, the existence of himself, I think the reason Membrane tries to keep him away from the paranormal is as stated: Membrane believes, and has always believed, that science is the only career worth chasing. He doesn't believe in the paranormal, because the spookies are just things that science doesn't yet understand. I think if we're lending to the clone theory, it'd also trouble him that his clone-son doesn't like science, and therefore is not the perfect clone. Dib's disinterest is a sign of something going wrong in his experiment, which is simply unacceptable. Furthermore, I think we don't give Membrane enough credit for just being a sentimental guy sometimes. Like any other dad, he just wants his son to think what he does is cool, and join in on his favorite thing.

I think Gaz's comment about a squeedily-spooch was just her being a glib little sister. Also, Dib literally had his organs stolen in that episode. Zim stole his organs to replace organs that he don't exist in Irken physiology. Sure, Dib could be part-human-part-Irken DNA, but if that was the case, Zim still would've noticed by now. He literally steals Dib's DNA signature on multiple occasions. Zim turns him into bologna one episode, and the both of them take extensive cultures of their DNA to try and cure themselves from being turned to meat. If not one, the other certainly would've noticed some Irken in there and pointed it out.

I can't find the episode immediately, but there's also episodes where Zim gets electrocuted and we get the humorous x-ray shots. There's also an episode where Membrane gets an x-ray shot. In both, their bone structure is different.

As neat as the idea is, especially in terms of a 'wow Dib's his own worst enemy' idea, I can't say the video swayed me, or that I could be convinced towards adding it into my own personal fanon. Very neat video though. Thanks for the rec homie