#another case of me trying to include characters who don’t have many quotes

[l-just-want-to-see]

On shame. 9/10

Dayenu definition / Dream, DSMP / Six of Crows, Leigh Bardugo / Wilbur Soot, DSMP / Scott Street, Phoebe Bridgers / Doodle of Tubbo with Tommy being taken into exile by Dream in the background, by meeee / Picture of Neptune / Neptune, Sleeping at Last / Technoblade, DSMP / Neptune, Sleeping at Last / Hannahxxrose, DSMP / this is me trying, Taylor Swift / Philza, DSMP / Crooked Kingdom, Leigh Bardugo / Tommyinnit, DSMP

[volann]

Everyone in tgcf is a foil character

Pt 2: Banyue

(here's pt 1, pt 3, pt 4)

While I'm sure something clever can be said about the meeting between Xie Lian and San Lang, if I do decide to compare them, I’ll do it later. So let's go straight to Banyue. I’ll start with Tian Sheng, and this is why: he is like Xie Lian when the latter was the crown prince. He believes in justice and wants to save everyone. He's also coincidentally seventeen years old. Tian Sheng represents the ideals that Xie Lian believed in his youth – he doesn’t understand why common people should suffer if they’re not the ones fighting. All the people who lived in wartime – Xie Lian, A-Zhao and Fu Yao – can see why this logic doesn't work in the midst of the conflict. There's not much more I can say about Tian Sheng, so let's move on to Kemo. We learn that he was weak when he was a child and people bullied him, so he swore to become stronger. He trained his body with stone mortar slate and thus gained his name (quoting wiki bc I can’t quote the books, I don’t have them in English). This sounds a lot like Hua Cheng, even though his motives might be different. Hua Cheng also gained his name by becoming stronger – the title “Crimson Rain Sought Flower” if taken literally and his reputation if taken figuratively. I don’t know what conclusion it leads to, but the similarity exists. By comparing Kemo with Xie Lian we can see how differently they treat people from countries that caused their respective homelands to fall: Kemo is still cruel to the people from the central plain even though Yong'an is long gone, while the prince, after almost bringing a disease to the same state, no longer wishes harm to anyone. He even protected and trained Lang Qianqiu, the crown prince of Yong'an.

Now, finally, about one of the more important characters – Ban Yue. With Hua Chen, or rather with Honghong-er, she is united by her difficult childhood and the fact that people around them treated them badly because of something they couldn't change - in Honghong-er's case it's appearance, in Banyue's case it's her mixed origin. Xie Lian helped them both survive. But her similarity to Xie Lian seems more obvious to me. During the war, Ban Yue tried to save as many people as possible from both sides, but it was hard. As a result, all of Banyue's citizens died because of her actions. She feels guilty for everything that happened even though it was impossible to save more people. Xie Lian compares himself to Ban Yue when they are speaking near Puqi shrine: he believes that the outcome of his actions was far worse than the consequences of Ban Yue's actions. Both characters don’t try to avoid the "punishment" - Ban Yue does not respond in any way to Kemo's beatings or resist when Fu Yao ties her up, while Xie Lian doesn’t try to get rid of his cursed shackles. They believe they deserve it. Another similarity is that both prefer to remember good things: Ban Yue forgets those who wronged her but forever remembers those who helped her, while Xie Lian prefers to remember tasty food rather than all the times he got hurt. They also died many times: Ban Yue let Kemo kill her to dispel the hatred of Banyue's warriors, and Xie Lian... the list is much longer here and it also includes deaths meant to save other people.

I don't think Pei Xiu can be called anyone’s foil, but it is still possible to compare his actions and opinions with those of Xie Lian. The situation here is somewhat similar to Kemo: Pei Xiu hates people with whom his country was at war. The difference is that he succeeded in getting rid of all the people of Banyue. Yes, it's worth noting that they were going to kill as many people from Yong'an as possible if they lost, but it seems to me that Pei Xiu would have been happy to get rid of them even without that. He talked quite a lot about revenge for what they had already done. Of course, there's still the question of how much he said to justify his actions, and whether the motivation of "I don't like Banyue" was stronger than "I need a better position in the army". Another aspect of his character that is completely opposite to Xie Lian is his treatment of the common people. Pei Xiu sent innocent people to certain death to maintain his position, while Xie Lian, as we know, wants to save the common people.

Perhaps I'll find out something else when these characters reappear, but let's stop here for now. I'll put off Nan Feng and Fu Yao for later again. It could be fun to compare Xie Lian and general Hua – as Xie Lian himself points out, their stories are quite similar, but I don't really want to compare the character to himself, especially when he has already done it. So it's time to step away from the characters for a bit!

In Banyue, you can only save a stung person at the cost of everyone’s lives. Many characters in tgcf are forced to choose who gets to live and at what cost, and I think in Banyue this problem appears for the first time – from General Hua, who saved the common people by interfering with the military and paid with his life in the end, Ban Yue  and probably even Pei Xiu to the place itself and the legends about it. Banyue is like the desert from the question of which of two people dying of thirst to give a glass of water to, and in the stories of many characters this is the central conflict.

[quirkle2]

If you don’t mind tho, would you have any clue where I could ask about this talk of the LU fandom/Jojo going out of line? I’m oblivious to whatever happened and I’m curious

it's a bit of a complicated and long story, but some of it has to do with fans in general just being rly pissy about characterizations. i'm not pointing any fingers or listing any names bc it's not a One Person kinda problem, and some people don't even notice/see the issue and don't think it's an issue at all. in the grand scheme of things, this first issue isn't rly that big of a deal

(this might get long, and might bring up some anxieties for people, so this break is for anybody who wants to avoid mentions of fandom discourse, including past belittlement of furries, otherkin, and systems. stay safe)

reminder: this is just me clarifying info bc somebody asked! i am not trying to dredge up old mistakes

^ some of the things im talkin about are like . people babying wind. people turning wars into a comic-relief character that only knows how to creep girls out. people turning twilight into an emo cowboy that constantly cries about his girlfriend that's now in another realm or whatever. people simplifying wild into a crazy arsonist who doesn't seem to have a brain. people taking the "bitter" part of legend and exaggerating it So much that he's literally just an asshole to everybody all the time for NO reason other than that "he's the bitchy one"

personally this isn't nearly as annoying to me as some others find it. but i think the Bigger one, for me at least, is jojo herself

in this post, jojo makes fun of furries and otherkin, which i do not agree with. i don't have a problem w jojo not wanting twi to be "furry-like" but she drew the furry purposefully disgusting and stupid-looking to make fun of them. i don't know much about otherkin, but i know it's wrong to make fun of other people, especially when they aren't hurting anybody <3

and in this post, while explaining four's characterization in the comic, jojo put the word system in air quotes, as if to suggest there's something wrong with systems or that they don't exist or something. that stirred up quite a lot of suspicion and doubt in the fandom, and many systems obviously did not like that. i am not a system, so that's all i'll put here—a lot of systems posted their own takes on it when it happened

jojo has since edited both the tumblr post and the insta post to not have the word system in quotes. she explained herself and apologized here and here (this specific one is, i Believe, referring to past mistakes such as the ones above), but some people still are a bit iffy on that whole debacle (me included)

there might be more, but that's everything that i personally know of as to why the fandom has sorta gone bad. this next reason (sorta two reasons) is a personal thing and i don't rly hold it against jojo herself:

silly reason: i just like familial bonds and Close relationships in fiction, and lu does not cover that. they call each other "brother" from time to time but that's not enough dammit i want them to cuddle and i want time to be the father figure and i want them to live in a nice ranch house together happily ever after OKAY!!!! /silly

a more serious reason: linkshipping

i DO NOT agree with people belittling others for posting linkshipping, and this happens in lu All The Time and it's appalling. im not gonna get into the whole "but it's against her rules" thing bc i have some conflicted feelings abt that whole topic and this will get ridiculously long if i prattle abt that, but . people r getting bullied. people r getting singled out and Called Out and hated on and, in extreme cases, Driven Off The Platform bc they posted two silly little fictional men kissing. that's inexcusable to me

it's a bit more complicated than that, but i am of the simple opinion that u should Never police how other people have fun, and this is all fictional and we should redirect our collective hatred toward Real World Problems instead of wasting our time on arguing about whether or not these fictional elves should kiss <3

if i do make a new au and get away from this fandom, i hope to provide a safe space for Everybody, including linkshippers

[twistedtummies2]

Gathering of the Greatest Gumshoes - Number 25

Welcome to A Gathering of the Greatest Gumshoes! During this month-long event, I’ll be counting my Top 31 Favorite Fictional Detectives, from movies, television, literature, video games, and more!

SLEUTH-OF-THE-DAY’S QUOTE: “How did people survive before there were pattern-recognizing sparse representation algorithms?”

Number 25 is…Abby Sciuto, from NCIS.

I’m cheating a bit with Abby, because she technically breaks one of my rules I established at the start of this event: no “side detectives.” What this rule means is that I’m supposed to only count the focal detective characters in the series, not any allies or assistants they may have. (For example: Sherlock Holmes would and will count, but Inspector Lestrade would and will not.) However, I’m making an exception in this character’s case, on the grounds of a.) the fact she’s my favorite character in the series, and b.) the way this show works.

“NCIS” is very similar to our previous entry’s source, “CSI: Crime Scene Investigation.” (Indeed, while this might be a coincidence, the two even SOUND sort of similar.) Rather than a typical detective/mystery series, where the focus is on a single chief sleuth solving baffling crimes, these shows are more “crime dramas,” and feature ensemble-type casts, where various different characters have different roles to play in the crime-solving process. And, just like CSI, the show does cycle itself through a sort of revolving cast, with major characters coming and going every several seasons. Our focus today, Abby Sciuto, is no exception: she is not the main character of the series, and in fact she left the show in Season 15 (the series is still going strong and will soon be having its 21st season, for reference). Therefore, many would say this is mammoth cheating, and it sort of is…but after tossing the idea of including her in the ranks or not around in my head for a while, I basically just threw up my hands and decided, “Fine. She’ll count.” Because I just love Abby that much.

For those who don’t know, “NCIS” focuses on the crime-stopping adventures of a team from the Naval Criminal Investigative Service, stationed in Washington D.C. For the first fifteen seasons of the program, Agent Abby Sciuto – played by Pauly Perrette (whom some comic-loving folks may know for voicing Lois Lane in “Superman vs. The Elite”) – was the chief forensic specialist of the team. She is at one point described as, “a paradox wrapped in an oxymoron, smothered in contradictions of terms,” and later in the same scene as “the happiest Goth you’ll ever meet.” Both of these descriptions pretty much fit Abby to a tea. On the one hand, Abby is cheerful, hyperactive, kindhearted, eccentric, and at times downright childish. On the other hand, she’s got a morbid and macabre sense of humor and style, a feisty and spunky edge to her personality, and can kick butt when the going gets tough (often surprising other members of the team when she does). On still another inexplicable third hand, however, she’s also deeply spiritual and at times shows a hidden vulnerability. She’s the youngest member of the team, and she’s also quite possibly one of its most brilliant: a genius years ahead of herself. It’s quite often Abby, specifically, who provides the final links in the chain to whatever puzzle the rest of the team are trying to solve, and her skills with electronics are easily matched with her perceptive talents of observation.

While I enjoyed “CSI,” as I said on my previous pick with Grissom, I felt the problem with the show was that a lot of the other characters just didn’t interest me as much as he did. NCIS, in some ways, has a similar and yet different problem: I actually think the whole cast of NCIS, generally speaking was pretty strong…for most of its run. (I mean, for God’s sake, you had David McCallum in the cast – may he rest in peace – that definitely had to count for something.) However, Abby was the primary reason I think I kept watching it; while the rest of the characters were fun, and I could actually say a LOT about ANY of them if I was asked (unlike most of CSI’s cast), she was truly something special. I’m going to be honest, it wasn’t long till after Abby left the series that I stopped watching it; I haven’t really caught up with most of the past five seasons since then. There were a LOT of behind-the-scenes issues that resulted in Perrette leaving the program, which I’m not going to go into here; suffice it to say, no one could fault her for her decision. It is a pity, all the same, that it seems Agent Sciuto will never return to spot out hidden details while downing enough caffeine to kill weaker souls.

Thanks for the good times, Abby.

Tomorrow, the countdown continues with Number 24!

CLUE: “No matter what the anthropological reasons, we fight to make the world a better place.”

[red-riding-wood]

⭐ Directors cut! :]

Thank you for the ask, Emily! I'll go with Time in a Bottle for this one. Ramble below cut.

This is another fic that is based off of a song that is very important to me (Time in a Bottle - Jim Croce). I have a massive fear of time, old age, death, etc. I always feel like I'm on a clock, always feel like time is moving too fast. So a lot of my own fear was projected onto the main character. And a lot of its inspiration came from the song. But it started with watching Faraway, So Close! (1993) and hearing Cassiel deliver the line, "Time is running from me." Emit, AKA Time, is then gone from the screen and Cassiel is left confused. I loved the symbolism of that so much and of Emit's name that I instantly knew I wanted to write something on it.

The character's fear of time is really embodied by the ticking of the clock in the bar. I remember trying to make it so that the tick was written at in the story when mortality, time, or the tension or fear was very acute so it would accentuate that. I also wanted the ticking to really drive home the character's conscious fear of time ticking down.

The first scene I thought of was the moment when Emit snaps his fingers and everything falls still and quiet. I also knew at this point that his "token" to her would be that moment, and probably at this point also knew the ending and the symbolism of the "time" in a bottle. There was something just very beautiful to me about the world falling still and silent around these two people in a sensual moment.

My memory is a bit hazy on the film, but I did kind of nab the whole plot of Cassiel falling to earth and becoming mortal. I remember the seeing in colour thing was a big thing in the film, as was the feeling of joy. So it was a bit of that and my own zest and yearning for life that made me want to describe everything as being very beautiful and vivid, from the colours and sights to the sounds and scents. I do think that there are many things that we as humans take for granted in life that, say, someone who's never experienced such things, (in this case, a fallen angel) would adore. The only thing the MC in this doesn't see the beauty in is death, nor does she understand the natural order. I wanted to make her a little naive, a little arrogant, since her world until this point has been very limited.

Though I haven't seen the film yet, I've seen clips from Knockin' On Heaven's Door (1997), and there's a particular one in which one of the characters says, "You've never been to the ocean. In Heaven, that's all they talk about.” For some reason, when I first heard this line, I thought it said, “And Heaven, that’s all they talk about,” as in, people go on about Heaven but don’t talk about the beautiful things that are here, on Earth, such as the ocean. This inspired the quote from TiaB, “Humans talk about Heaven as if it is an escape from life, some craved destination that they are all too eager to reach. But they don’t know what they have.”

From this I also developed a newfound appreciation for the ocean. I've lived by it for the past seven or so years, because my parents moved me out here when I was thirteen, and I've always hated it, partly because of them and partly because I personally think things would've worked out a lot better if they hadn't chosen to move here. But after hearing that line, I went to the beach one day and I just sat by the water for a long while and I thought to myself, "This is really beautiful." So I decided to include the ocean in the story. I still want to fucking move, though.

I definitely drew quite a bit of inspiration from the show, Supernatural, as well. I mean, there's literally an angel named Castiel who ends up becoming more human after falling and is first perceived as very arrogant and soldier-like. I think the "smite first, ask questions later" line might've actually been pulled from the show or inspired by some line in the show. This film reminded me of it and I decided to mesh the two into a bit of a guideline in my head for how this particular universe worked.

Overall, I think this is my most poetic piece, and I hold it to a similar regard as Heroes (though it's also my most "artsy" and my friend didn't understand it). I believe I wrote this after that, and it was the beginning of my barely-writing-anything-and-hating-myself-for-it period. I only wrote a couple paragraphs or so at a time, so it took me forever to write, until one day I had a surge of motivation and I just wrote the last of it over the next couple days.

[p-antomime]

What if...

— minors don’t interact. | wc: 4,5K.

content + warnings: 18+, including: sadist!fushiguro toji, manhandle, unprotected sex, rough sex, fingering, non-con, almost cervix fucking, breeding kink, gun play, heavy degradation, creampie, forced submission, size kink, dark content, public sex, spitting, dumbification, implied dacryphilia.

pairings: serial killer!toji fushiguro x reader.

— inspired by: somebody's watching me.

my kinktober list.

note: all the characters quoted in this work are over 21 years of age.

tw. this work may contain triggers about chase, violence, non consensual sex, forced submission and coercion, so please be careful reading.

— Have you got everything? — Maki asked as she finished helping Itadori put the bags into the trunks of the two different cars that would take you to the campground about an hour or so away from the capital.

— I think so. — Y/N replied trying to mentally go over everything she would need during those three days they would spend away from civilization. — Ah, calm down! My cell phone charger, I'll be right back. — And then she ran to the house, went to Maki's room and looked for the charger in the girl's messy bedroom with her eyes, finding it lying beside the bed and, after picking it up, returning to where everyone was waiting. — Now, yes, I got everything.

— Alright, who's going to drive anyway? — Maki looked at Itadori.

— Don't look at me...

— Tsk. — Maki rolled her eyes and nodded to Yuuta who was already getting into the other car. — Who will drive the car that me, Nobara, Y/N and Toge are going?

— Mai I think, or Fushiguro?

— I'm the one who's going. — Megumi answered, unlocking the doors and in a matter of seconds you were sitting in the passenger seat next to Fushiguro while in the back seat were your three other colleagues, with Toge almost immediately putting on headphones and Nobara opening her cell phone to check Twitter.

— Will there be internet there? — Nobara asked, and you glanced her over your shoulder as Megumi drove off, following the path taken by Yuuta in front.

— We're going to the middle of nowhere, y'know...

— Yes, but even in the "middle of nowhere" you can have internet by 2021. — Nobara answered with a shrug.

— The idea was that we would disconnect a lil' from the internet for a few days. — Maki commented. — Then maybe we could just enjoy our camping trip.

— I wanted to go to a Halloween party, to be honest. — You commented, suddenly regretting a little that you had accepted Itadori and Yuuta's idea about the camp.

— I think everyone this month is a little afraid to go out on the streets, let alone have a party. — Maki replied. — Y'know... the serial killer... — Megumi looked at her through the mirror on top of the front window of the car.

— And you believe this?

— Don't you?

— Most of the news I read about is pretty biased... and apparently the modus operandi from one crime to another differs in some ways and... — Nobara interrupted him.

— For heaven's sake... we are going to this camp to relax, not to talk about every morbid case of Tokyo's crime. Can y'all change the subject?

— Wanna put on some music? — Y/N asked, not letting Megumi retort nor Maki open her mouth to rebut his comments.

— Yeah, put this playlist on, please. — Nobara handed you her cell phone for a few seconds to connect to the bluetooth system of the car rented by Fushiguro.

"Great, peace for at least an hour", Y/N thought sighing heavily and trying to relax as the car was driven through the streets of Tokyo.

There was one day left until Halloween, it was the 30th.

And, stopping to reflect now, something inside your core began to bother with Yuuta and Yuuji wanting so badly to go away from the capital just one day before Halloween.

How many movies even had the same plot as this day you were experiencing, of a group of people at a camp who end up dying? Several.

The Burning, Cheerleader Camp, Madman, Sleepway Camp... and of course Friday the 13th.

Suddenly, as you ran through these movies in your head a shiver ran down your spine and you were a little startled when you felt something on your leg and swallowed hard realizing it was only Megumi's fingertips trying to get your attention.

— Are you all right? — He asked, and you raised one eyebrow. — You look uncomfortable, if you wanna trade places with Inumaki in the car, I can park.

— Oh, no... no, thank you, Megumi. — You forced yourself to open the kindest, most affectionate smile you could. — Thank you for thinking of me, but you don't have to do that, I'm completely OK.

— Okay, but if you need anything during the trip... — His eyes went from your face to the road visible in front of him through the car window. — You can ask me.

You nodded positively and responded with a "mhm" before glancing over to the back corner to see that Maki, now asleep, had laid her head on Nobara's shoulder, who was now distracted by the view out the window, and Toge had fallen asleep with his headphones on and head resting against the other window.

Nobody seemed worried about anything. Except for you, who clenched your fingers nervously, still feeling uncomfortable.

It wasn't even Megumi's fault, he wasn't doing anything but driving and occasionally glancing at you and the back seat to make sure everyone was okay. In fact, he was not feeling watched as you were.

You felt that something, someone was watching you through the window glass next to you, even after closing it and sunk your back into the car seat.

And so about two hours passed and soon the two cars were parked at the entrance of Hikawa Campground and everybody was dragging their backpacks and small suitcases with their belongings to the spot in the middle of the trees where the multi-room facility was that you had all agreed to rent. But halfway there, you swore to God that you heard the sound of stones being thrown, or rather: stepped on, in a field not far from where you and your friends were, but the sound came from a more closed forest area and, well?

You would rather have curiosity eating away at you than have an unwelcome surprise, so, as you turned to see where your friends were and saw them moving further and further away from the point where you stopped walking, your feet ran to where Toge, Choso and Yuuta, who were furthest from the group formed by Maki, Mai and Nobara and, further ahead, Megumi, Miwa and Itadori, were.

— We're gonna have a bonfire today, right? — Nobara asked, watching the group slowly disintegrate as each went to their respective rooms.

— Yes, the idea is to make a fire tonight, sleep in the tents and in the morning come back here so we can hike and walk along the river. — Choso replied.

— And what time d'you want to have the bonfire? — Mai asked.

— Hmm... — Choso looked at where Itadori and Yuuta were.

— Seven o'clock at night, 'cause when we get hungry it will already be burning brightly! — Yuuta said.

And after that, definitely, everyone went to their bedown room and you took a deep breath, leaning over the slightly uncomfortable bed. At least you wouldn't have to share a room with anyone.

The cell phone in your pocket vibrated and you picked it up, reading the notification from its digital bar. It was a typical Google notification, the ones that usually expose breaking news push, and it was talking about the fact that they had managed to reconstruct a sketch of who apparently was the serial killer Maki had mentioned earlier.

Again, you felt a shiver run down your spine, the feeling of being watched increasing more than when you were in the car next to Megumi and instinctively your eyes fell on the wide-open bedroom window.

What if someone wanted to enter your room during the night? What if that camping facility wasn't as safe as it looked? What if...

But then, the only thing you did, besides clicking on the Google news push out of sheer curiosity, was to close that window.

Your fingers immediately scrolled down the Google tab screen until they stopped over the scanned serial killer drawing and you rolled eyes in frustration. The drawing was terrible, to say the least. It literally looked like any dark-haired guy you see on the street and you probably put your skirt down a little for fear of him swiping at you, but then the notes below the drawing caught your attention. "Scar on right corner of lip, green eyes".

To be honest, after mentally visualizing him, you thought he looked like Megumi and it was best to keep that realization to yourself, since no one in their right mind would enjoy having any resemblance to a wanted by the police. Then you went to take a shower thinking that it would help you forget your worries, but they were only reinforced when you locked the bathroom door real tight and were afraid that someone was waiting for you outside the shower stall; it took you long minutes to actually finish taking that shower, put on some more comfortable clothes with a pair of short tapestry that didn't totally stick to your body and a blue tank top.

As you left the room, you found Itadori, Megumi and Yuuta getting ready to go fishing while Mai and Maki were busy talking among themselves and looking at the cell phone of one of them.

It seemed that only you had nothing planned for that afternoon away from the city, and you snorted trying to think of something you could do to pass the time.

Walking was probably the best option, right?

With that in mind, you sent a message to both Megumi and Maki that you were going for a walk alone and that if you didn't come back half an hour before the bonfire time, they were to come after you because something bad had happened.

A bad feeling was eating away at you, but at the same time you didn't want to end up having to be on your friends' heels because of a perhaps passing bad feeling.

So you went for a walk. And, truth be told, it was great to breathe fresh air. Great until your memory reminded you that maybe you had gone too far, and even the sound of the river from the big campground seemed distant now.

The trees around you seemed to multiply more and more, the silence morbid around you.

Only the sound of your breathing, slowly quickening with nervousness, filled yours ears. The feeling of being watched increased almost to the point where you felt that someone was watching you from a few meters away.

You turned around, swallowing hard and longing to go back to where your friends were, and, without looking back, started walking again.

Four steps, heartbeat increasing.

Five steps, your ears picked up the sound of something breaking, probably a twig, at some point behind you.

"Fuck, fuck", your mind repeated over and over again as your feet started to run as far as you could.

You felt something try to grab the back of your blue top and then try to run even faster, but you barely managed to cross more 10 feet.

Something had been thrown against your heel and your body went to the ground, face hitting the grass and dirt, clothes getting dirty and eventually a weight greater than yours being placed on your smaller body.

You were flipped forward and as you looked up with vision blurred from the fall, your face was met by a man with dark hair, thin lips, emerald eyes and a smile of amusement decorating his lips that had a scar in the right corner.

Before you could scream, his hand pushed against your mouth and you didn't even have time to raise your arms to try to fight him off, his other palm had already grabbed your wrists and pulled them over your head; then your eyes watered and legs tried to kick him, which wasn't very effective.

— Oh, darling. What made you think you could ever get away? So naive and tiny. — His husky voice reverberated in yours ears. — Why are you crying already? I haven't even done anything yet, and your cute lil' face is too pretty to be stained by tears. — His tongue flicked across his lips as his eyes traveled down your body in rapt scrutiny. — I wondered how long it would be before you ran out and I had to do this to you.

And though he had said that your face was too beautiful to be stained by tears, they were already wetting your cheeks and your arms were still trying to free themselves from his firm grip.

— Let's make a deal, hm? — He raised his eyebrows suggestively and you tried to focus on what he was saying, tried to calm down. — I'm gonna take my hand out of your mouth and you're not going to scream 'cause you're a good girl and know how to behave, understand? And if you scream or try to do anything I don't like, I'll break your teeth and then make you swallow 'em and go after your friends and then, who knows, do worse things to you. You don't want that, d'you? — Your head shook in a desperate negative way and his amused smile reappeared on his lips. — Okay, lil’ girl.

And you kept your mouth shut, in fact.

Mouth closed and eyes still watering, watching the man above you reach into the waistband of the jeans he was wearing and pull out a pistol. Opening the barrel, he let you see that the gun was loaded with about three bullets and you swallowed hard, still with the mouth closed.

— So, little girl, what d'you think I should do with you? — He asked, raising one eyebrow and positioning the cold barrel of the gun against your lips. — Should I fuck you out here? Where anyone can see you struggling to take my cock? Or are you the type who prefers to do the dirty work in a more private place, hm?

— P-Please... — You began to speak, growing more and more frightened with every brush of your lips against the barrel of his gun. — I j-just wanna go back to where they are, please, I... — He pressed the pistol more firmly against yours lips and your voice fell silent.

— You're dumber than you look and on top of that, you're behaving very badly, you haven't answered my question. — Your eyes watered again. — Oh, stop crying, sweetheart, you'll almost make me feel guilty for what I'm about to do to you.

— Please, please, lemme go, and.. I-I won't say anything about you to anyone, I swear! — He stared at you for a few seconds.

— You really are dumb, aren't you? — He asked. — Maybe I should just fuck you here and leave your body full of my cum to be found by someone else, what d'you think about it? — You swallowed hard and took a deep breath, your eyes starting to sting from crying.

For survival reasons, you had to restrain yourself in order to have more docile reactions, you didn't want to have a gun bullet buried in your skull.

— Don't take me a-any further away from here, p-please? — You tried to speak without letting your voice get any deeper.

— Oh, so you'd rather I rail you out here? What a lewd little girl. — He whispered, releasing your hands from his grip on his palm and pulling you up by the base of your neck.

Your legs curled a little to support your body, but soon you found yourself standing in front of this man who was extremely stronger than you and broad-shouldered.

His eyes suggestively looked at the garments still covering your body and you understood that he wanted you naked, so soon those clothes were on the floor around your body.

Toji turned away from you momentarily and circled the area in the same way a predator would do if he was admiring his next victim.

— Look at this body... — He remarked with a satisfied smile. — All mine to break and destroy, all mine to use 'til I tire.

Toji stopped behind you, placing the barrel of his gun against the side of your neck and resting his chest against your back while his other hand slid down the sides of your body giving your hips a firm squeeze before slipping it between your legs only to rub his fingertips against your folds that were slowly starting to get wet.

— And you're still a dirty slut who gets wet being chased through the trees, I knew from the start when I first laid eyes on you that you were the type to only pretend to be innocent. — His fingers withdrew from between your legs to rise up to your eye level and you felt terrible looking them wet and feeling the arousal drip from your entrance to inner thighs. — Look at you already getting wet like this, now, why don't you get down on your knees like a good girl for me, hm?

— I-I might know your name at least... — You spoke in a whisper, inevitably shrugging shoulders at his watchful gaze and doing as he commanded, feeling your knees quickly begin to chafe from direct exposure to the uneven soil of the place.

— Call me Toji, and be sure to remember my name well when I'm deep inside you. — He answered, still crouching behind you and putting one leg between yours.

His right hand spread over your back and forced your body forward and back, soon the side of your face was pressed against the same floor your knees were on and you were fully on all fours with your back to Toji, who felt his cock getting harder and harder under his underpants and pants.

He loved forcibly subduing stupid little girls like you and you were not even the third girl in a week that he took advantage of without any remorse. It was precisely this feeling of being forced to submission by an aggressive and violent stranger that was managing to make your exposed pussy leak against the fabric of his jeans.

Toji leaned over your body, brushing his lips against your ear and whispering:

— I know you are thirsty for me to use you now, to fuck you raw. — Toji slid the pistol's free hand down your torso until it reached your pelvis and cunt, where it began to circle and press on your clit, occasioning more of your arousal fluid to escape. — Your pussy won't let you lie, it's almost begging me to bury my cock in it and fill it with my cum, I'm sure you can feel your own pussy clenching around nothing as I speak, can't you? I know you can. — He applied more pressure against your clit and smiled wickedly noticing your hips trying to force themselves upward in search of more of his fingers. — See, you stupid slut? You could scream that you don't want this, try to convince yourself that you don't, but your body says otherwise, love.

And then Toji began to work his hand against your pussy, sometimes concentrating on stimulating your clit and other times penetrating your wet insides with his long fingers, making your walls expand and squeeze them hard.

Every time the tip of them bent and hit that spongy spot that made you roll your eyes in pleasure and need to bite your mouth to not let any moans escape, your orgasm got closer and closer.

The knot in the pit of your tummy was driving you almost crazy, you wanted to cum so bad and you wanted more of Toji's rough touch, treating you like a ragdoll.

Your eyes closed tightly as your body was so close to cumming. Just a few more stimulations from his fingers. But Toji pulled his hand away from you with a mischievous laugh escaping his lips, you looked over one shoulder at him with your face completely contorted with frowns and mouth hanging open from the pleasure.

— Oh, sweetheart, did you really think I'd let you cum so easily like that? — Toji brought his fingers to his lips, licking them slowly before going to unbutton and unzip his pants and, after that, pulling his underwear down with them.

As soon as your eyes fell on his dick leaking pre-cum, you were absolutely certain that it would hurt more than you could bear without screaming when he entered you

Long, big, that's Toji Fushiguro.

His hand eventually left the pistol on the floor away from your body to put both hands on your waist, lifting you to stand with your cunt in front of the tip of his cock and start rubbing it against your wet folds. And you moaned because of the sensitivity, fully aware that you needed just the right stimulation to make you cum; your orgasm was still so close it hurt.

And the right stimulation came in the form of a strong thrust that Toji used to push himself into you.

Your whole body broke down and there was no time for the synapses in your brain to register the mind-blowing pain of having your walls stretched almost to the limit, with the tip of his cock kissing your cervix.

You had orgasmed. With a simple thrust of him into you.

You would have fallen forward if that man's firm hands hadn't been gripping your hips tightly and holding you still, legs trembling unable to support your weight, vision almost going white.

— Fuck, did you just cum for having me invading you? Such a needy whore. — Propelling your body upward and making your back count his firm chest, Toji ran one hand up your tits, squeezing them in the process, clamped it to your chin and pulled your face down so that you could see where his cock was entering you, the length of it wet now from both his own pre-cum and your newly released arousal. — Look how you try to take it all in your greedy pussy. — He pulled his entire cock out of you only to thrust fully into you again.

Your back arched as you felt him slam against your cervix again and the moans coming from your mouth were shamelessly too loud for someone who shouldn't be enjoying the situation. Your desperate mouth opened wide for air and Toji took the opportunity to turn your head to the side and let a trickle of his saliva fall into your mouth, and you swallowed like the good girl he wanted you to be.

His hips began to thrust against yours with force, in a rhythm that gradually turned to be a more bestial, more violent one.

Your body rising and falling along with his, ass and hips gradually becoming redder from the impact of flesh on flesh, walls squeezing his cock tighter and tighter, eyes beginning to water again, but this time because of the overstimulation, and your whole body trembling with hands desperately gripping the sides of Toji's larger-than-life body partly to get more balance as far as possible, partly to make sure he wouldn't pull away again without letting you reach orgasm.

Your mouth desperately drooling and letting little "Please" and "Toji" escape in the form of moans, he had totally corrupted you, turned you into a slut in need of his cock in a matter of a few minutes, just under an hour.

— You bouncing around on my cock like a good girl, what a sigh. — Toji whispered in your ear, his low voice sending several shivers down your back. — What d'you want, hm? Want me to shoot my cock deep inside you and let you carry my babies? Want me to breed you and make you carry my seed back to camp like a good obedient whore?

And contradicting everything your own common sense had been whispering in your ear all along, your head desperately nodded and a slurred "Y-Yes, ple... please" escaped yours lips.

So Toji kept sinking inside you. And again, the same knot as before in the bottom of your belly indicated that your second orgasm was coming and you wanted so badly to know what it felt like to have your womb filled to the brim with cum, even if it was from that obnoxious man.

In an erratic thrust, his dick ended up painting your walls white, those hot spurts inside your pussy making you moan even more and end up coming just a short time later as Toji continued to move his hips back and forth, this time slowing down little by little, just to make sure you got his cum as deep as possible, even though your cunt was too small to hold qll his load and it would eventually leak a little.

He pulled his cock out of you, spread your legs a little wider so that you could see your pussy spurting some of the liquid and grunted softly at the scene.

You were such a good and useful fucktoy for him, taking his dick without complaint.

— You're so cockdrunk now, doll, so pretty and all just for me. — Toji pulled your face up to take your lips in a kiss that meant nothing but willingness to keep using your body until he was done ruining you. — What d'you think about me keeping you as my favorite fucktoy, uh? — From the cocky smile on his lips decorated with that scar, you couldn't tell if he was serious or if you wanted him to be.

But then, without Toji's objection, you just stood back slightly and began to silently manage to gather your clothes with legs still wobbly and trembling, plus your hips could barely move properly and brain didn't know how to begin to formulate an excuse to give your friends when you got back to the camping place.

Before you could finish buttoning those shorts, feeling Toji's cum leak out through the slit in your pussy and wet the bottom of your panties, he grabbed your wrist and squeezed lightly.

— I'm coming for you in Tokyo, so I hope you're ready to be chased again, this time through the city streets. — Toji opened a cynical smile and you felt your cheeks heat violently, obviously that everything was a game to him.

And you wanted to ask him how he knew you, for what reason he "chose" you. He didn't seem like the kind of criminal who picked his victims randomly, but shame flooded through you violently as you realized that you really had fucked a guy who is wanted by the police, who kills people all over town like it was nothing. Not fear, just shame.

— Oh, why are you so gloomy now? — Toji began to button his pants after pulling up his underwear. — You must be wondering how I know ya and how I knew you would be here today, right? Well... you know my son.

[writing-with-olive]

How to write essays fast

I've been writing a lot of papers, so that's what's on my mind.

So this mostly applies to your standard 5-paragraph paper, though it's fairly straightforward to adapt it to longer (or sometimes shorter) assignments.

One of the main things to note is that essays are VERY formulaic, so knowing the formula and being able to write down your ideas in a way that fit into the formula is probably the number one way to get stuff done fast. Because of that, most of what I’m covering is breaking down the formulas so they’re more accessable.

Also this got very long. If there’s anything you want me to expand on just let me know in the comments or send me an ask/DM and I’ll make another post that goes more in-depth about it.

Structure (I hate this step, so I’ve figured out how to do it very fast becuase it’s still important)

The first thing to consider is prewriting and structure. To start, there are two major paper structures I usually consider. The first goes

Introduction

Main point #1

Main point #2

Main point #3

Conclusion

This is good if you have a lot to say on the topic, or if it's something closer to a summary essay where there's not really an opposing side. In something where there are distinct sides, (or if you have less to say to support your own side), you may want something that looks like

Introduction

Main point #1

Main point #2

Why the other side is wrong

Conclusion

The "why the other side is wrong" side is involves thinking through the MOST credible arguments the other side might make, and methodically breaking them down to show how they don't work. The stronger the argument you choose, the more effective this is.

Since I personally hate prewriting with a passion, I usually do this step very fast and end up with an outline that looks like

Intro [insert thesis statement]

P1: [three word summary]

P2: [three word summary]

P3: [three word summary]

Conclusion

(thesis statement, introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion tips are all below the cut)

Usually, this is enough so when I look at my outline, I can see what I'm trying to focus on for each paragraph - and do so without straying from my main point.

For the prewriting, the main things to do are identify with basic structure of the two will serve your purposes better, and write a thesis statement that solidly supports your argument.

Thesis Statement

There are so many guides about creating thesis statements that are powerful, but I'm just going to quickly go over how to be fast about it.

The first thing to know is that a thesis statement is usually a complex sentence: it's your entire essay distilled down to a single line. The general formula I follow goes something like this:

"In their [media type] [name of specific piece], [creator's full name] explored/demonstrated/other verb [theme you're going to be arguing about] demonstrated/using/as evidenced/as shown by [example 1], [example 2], and [optional example 3]."

For example, a thesis statement that follows this format might go

“In his short film Job at Place, David Davidson explored the manifestations of human stupidity through the absurdity of the main character’s home, school, and office.”

Or, if you're writing a historical piece, it might look something like this:

"In [place/time period], [thing you're arguing was happening]: they had to/the conditions were such that/other thing to set up a list [example 1], [example 2], and [example 3]."

For example, a thesis statement that follows this format might go

“During the Tusken Invasion of 32nd century Tatooine, it was the lives of the children that were most affected, from their social development and connections with others to more personal struggles they didn’t yet have the tools to overcome.”

The examples you give are going to correlate to your paragraphs - example 1 is for body paragraph 1, and so on. 

Introduction

I like to think of the introduction as a funnel that gets more and more specific.

First, write a broad statement that touches on whatever theme you’re referencing. 

Job at Place is about human stupidity, so something like “while great minds have flourished throughout the ages, so have the not-so-great.”

Tatooine is about war, and about child development, so something like “children’s development has always been impacted by the state of the world around them.” or “war has many effects, many of which impact those not directly involved with the conflict.”

The idea is that it’s a broad statement that can almost be looked at like a universal truth.

Next, you’re going to go deeper - two sentences that narrow down the time and place you’re talking about specifically, and how that time and place fit into your universal statement. 

The fourth sentence gets even more specific - introducing how the thesis sentence fits into your first three sentences.

Then the last line is your thesis statements. 

Body Paragraphs

Your three main body paragraphs all follow the same formula. (I’ll get to the “why the other side is wrong” paragraph in a minute)

The first sentence you’re going to want is a topic sentence. For this, you’re going to want to look at the example you gave in your thesis statement that corresponds to this paragraph, and see how it relates to your central claim. 

If we’re going with the Job at Place example from above, for the second paragraph, you might open with a line like:

“A striking characteristic of Davidson’s short film was the abnormality of the main character’s school, used to showcase exactly what happens when poor decisions get taken too far.”

Everything within the paragraph will then back up the claim you’re making in the topic sentence (which in turn is backing up your thesis). 

For each paragraph, you’re probably going to want about three pieces of evidence, either in the form of direct quotes (plucking words directly from the source) or paraphrased quotes (summarizing what happened in your own words). The quote should be used to directly support your argument.

After each piece of evidence, you’re going to want about... twoish lines of analysis (this number can change as you need it to, but two lines is something solid to fall back to). 

While analysis can take all kinds of forms, one pattern you can use if you’re stuck is

evidence sentence 

what it means

how that meaning ties back into your main point

Following this pattern, a piece of analysis of Job at Place might look like:

“One of the first images of the private school is that it’s a tall spire with creaking stairs and loose floorboards. Despite this, the principal has eight personal cars parked outside on full display. While the first glimpse of the school might indicate that there is little money to care for the structural integrity, the notion is directly negated by the principal’s actions. By using these two images, Davidson demonstrates what can happen to the youth when those in power let greed carry them away.”

After you write your analysis, include some kind of transition phrase, and go onto the next piece of evidence.

The last line of your paragraph is going to transition into the next paragraph while also summing up the main point of what you talked about in the current one. (This line can also get moved down and tacked onto the beginning of the next paragraph, before the topic sentence, but I have found it tends to look less cohesive that way).

You might choose something like:

“While the school was a disaster in its own right, it wasn’t the only example of human folly.”

If you’re writing a “this is why the other side is wrong” you’re going to want to think about the MOST compelling arguments the other side could make. Take the top one (or two), and figure out ways to crack them apart using evidence from your source material.

In this case, your topic sentence might start off with something like

“While opponents might say [insert compelling counterargument], their reasoning breaks down when one takes into account the evidence.”

At this point, you’re going to follow the same formula as above. The main thing to keep in mind is that for the duration of this paragraph, your point is that the other side’s claim of X is wrong.

Conclusion!

If you know what you’re doing, this is actually the easiest part.

(wait, what??????)

The thing is, you NEVER want to introduce new ideas into your conclusion. Instead, you’re summarizing your main points.

The formula I follow per sentence is:

Thesis statement but reworded (you can change the sentence structure too)

Topic sentence for paragraph 2 or 3, but reworded (I’ll explain why you shouldn’t do the sentence for P1 in just a sec)

Topic sentence for paragraph 1 or 3 but reworded

Topic sentence for paragraph 1 or 2 but reworded

Wow sentence or question (i’ll get to this too)

The idea for the middle three sentences is you don’t want them to read as repetitive, so you’re going to mix up the order so it doesn’t match the order of the rest of the essay. This will help to keep it fresh.

The wow sentence is basically the last impression you get to make. I find it’s usually a good idea to go just a tad dramatic (it sounds dumb, but it has never failed me). If I can’t think of anything, a declarative statement on whatever major theme was being discussed throughout the essay usually does the trick.

Examples:

All of this shows that in the absence of friendships and platonic love, humanity will falter.

Fiction may seem far fetched now, but if the world falls into those same mistakes, it’s only a matter of time until it becomes a reality.

Art has existed for as long as humans have populated the earth; it’s not going away any time soon.

A lesson everyone must understand is the most powerful weapon isn’t anything physical or tangeable: it’s the ideas that exist in the minds of those who care.

(I told you they were going to be dramatic) A way I look at it is if you can’t imagine dropping the mic on the last line, it needs to be stronger (yes I found that plagiarized with not even a whisper of credit on Pinterest, but it works).

If you wrote a SOLID essay, consider ending with a question aimed at the reader (this will push your essay in the direction of either the positive or negative extreme: a strong essay will become stronger, a weak essay will become weaker). Questions can be a call to action or rhetorical as a means to drive home your final point. Becuase they’re more nuanced to the content of the essay, I don’t really have great examples to give you though (sorry).

Hopefully this is useful to at least some of you - good luck!

++++

Tagging:@candlemouse

If you want to be added to or removed from any of my taglists (found pinned to the top of my blog) just let me know :)

[delirious-donna]

To be honest, I can't quite believe I've hit this milestone already and actually I achieved it two days ago (this is so unreal to me)!

I would love to personally thank every single one of you, but y'know, I do have a life and I'm definitely not rich enough to be visiting you all, but just know that I would!

Anyway, this is to allow me an opportunity to give back! Please have a look at the rules and pick something you'd like from me!

Event Close Date: CLOSED 29th August 2022 (or if I get snowed under, but I'll update) Rules and options are below the cut ^^

The Rules

must be following me

over 18 blogs only, yes I'm offering SFW options but my blog is primarily NSFW so yeah... NO MINORS!

can be for any of my fandoms: Naruto, Jujutsu Kaisen, My Hero Academia, Black Clover, Fairy Tail, Edens Zero & Bleach

requests need to be off anon so I can check the top two rules are being followed but if you want to stay anon when I post, just tell me, it's no problem

at this time I'm not going to limit requests per person except ones that are first come first served - but be mindful of others

please be patient, all requests will be fulfilled but I do have to work and live so yeah...gimme a chance to rock your world

all drabbles/scenarios will be around 500 words, although I am not known for brevity so it could be more

I will assume female reader in scenarios unless gender neutral is specified, male reader needs to be assessed on a case by case basis but is not a straight no

I'll be using the tag delirious500 for all posts for this event

Option One - Can I take you out? (SFW)

Self-ships are amazing and need more coverage so this option is for anyone that wants that true experience with your favourite beau. Send me a description of yourself, as much detail as you are comfortable with (physical attributes, hobbies, maybe a little of your dress sense and if you consider yourself an introvert or extrovert) or you could send a photo – which will be deleted, of course. Choose a pet name or nickname and tell me your favoured character. I will write up a date for you cute little sweethearts. I am asking for this to come in off anon, but you can tell me you would prefer to be anon when it posts. No one needs to know it’s you if you don’t want!

Option Two - Sin with me... (SFW or NSFW)

Sinning never felt better than when it’s done with your beloved. Choose one of the seven deadly sins and your character of choice. I will write up a drabble based on your choices, this can be either SFW or NSFW, just let me know what you want. If I find I get too many requests for the same sin, I might take it off the menu. Just remember, lust isn’t the only fun one… promise.

Pride, Greed, Lust, Envy, Gluttony, Wrath & Sloth

Option Three - I wanna do bad things with you (NSFW)

Pick a prompt from below and give me your character of choice. I will write a short drabble around the theme of the quote. Let me know if there is anything you specifically do NOT want to be included. Only one request for each prompt – I will cross them out as they go. If I get two for the same then it will be first come first served but I will offer another option to the person who misses out, cause I’m a motherfucking sweetheart! ^^

“Your face would look better between my legs.”

“Roses are red, Violets are blue, I’m using my hand but I’m thinking of you.”

“I give you permission to wake me up if you get horny.”

“A gentleman holds my hand. A man pulls my hair. A soulmate will do both.”

“I wanna be the reason you slightly tilt your phone away from others when you read it.”

“I swear to you I won’t stop until your legs are shaking and the neighbors know my name.”

“Respect me. Adore me. Dominate me.”

“I want to taste me on your fingers.”

“The key to a great marriage — keep the fights clean and the sex dirty.”

“Now spread your legs and try to tell me about your day.”

“Spank me. It’s the only way I learn.”

[overthinkingfandom]

Cards on the Table - Breaking down the tactics in L'manburg Independence

/rp /dsmp

Much has been said in the fandom about L'manburg's independence. It is, after all, arguably the most important moment in DSMP's history, as the rest of the story wouldn't have existed without it. 

In light of the recent anniversary of it, yes I know I’m late, I wanted to throw my hat in the ring and add something to the discussion surrounding it. However, as the morality of the situation has been discussed to death I'll be taking a slightly different approach to it. 

Due to the nature of the DSMP's medium, the story has many unique quirks. One of those quirks is how realistic the tactics used in the story's portrayal of politics are. The independence conflict is a great example of it. While on the surface things seem to be rather simplistic in nature, there's a lot more going on that’s less obvious.

Both Wilbur and Dream are brilliant politicians who get to show both their strengths and weaknesses in dealing with an equally skilled opponent in this encounter. There’s actually quite a bit to go into, despite their interactions being so short.

When most people think about the L'manburg's independence, they think about the moment the declaration has been written up and the subsequent declaration of war. While this moment is certainly iconic, it's not really all that impactful in the grand scheme of things. Both declarations are the culmination of decisions that have been made beforehand. It's the moment when those decisions were made that really influenced things.

Conveniently, Wilbur and Dream only hold a single conversation about L'manburg before the declarations are drawn up, so we don’t need to look far in order to figure out where those decisions were formed. 

Wilbur has been working on L’manburg, collecting materials and building the wall surrounding it, for almost an hour when he spots Dream lurking. “Get [Dream] into the VC, I need to talk with him. He’s the leader of the other nation, I think we need to have a congress.” (52:44)

Dream: “Hello?”

Wilbur: “Hello Dream. Welcome to our great nation of L’manburg.”

Dream: “L’manburg?”

Wilbur: “Yes. We are seceding from Dream SMP. This is our own server now. This area, just this part [between the walls of L’manburg], is our server.”

Wilbur doesn’t waste any time before getting right down to business and talking about the matter at hand. However, the way he speaks about it here and in the rest of the conversation is fairly interesting. Wilbur is talking about L’manburg as if it’s something which already exists. They are seceding. This is their land. This conversation is merely a courtesy to give Dream a formal notice of their separation.

Yet, a bit later Wilbur shows he knows they need Dream’s acknowledgement in order for L’manburg to be its own entity. Independence is not a concrete thing that can just be taken or created on one person’s whim, after all. It only exists when the people with power agree it exists. 

Wilbur: “Dream, basically all we want from you is just acknowledgement that we are an independent nation now. That’s all we need.” (56:20)

So if Wilbur knows they aren’t independent yet, why is he talking like that? 

It’s because he’s using a salesman technique called an Assumptive Close. Instead of posing it as a question and putting the choice of agreeing or disagreeing in Dream’s hands, Wilbur acts as if it’s already true and leaves the burden of challenging his claims on Dream’s shoulders. He even moves on to ask secondary questions on how Dream feels about having embassies in his land (and notably he frames it as a question, unlike how he frames the topic of L’manburg’s independence) as if L’manburg is already a political entity. 

Wilbur: “Dream, I’ve got a proposition for you. How do you feel about having Tommy’s land being an embassy? Like it’s an enclave in your own land.” (59:01)

Wilbur’s use of this technique has an interesting side effect in that it signals to Dream Wilbur is taking a non-compromising position in this negotiation. In essence saying “L’manburg is independent, take it or leave it.” 

A non-compromising position is the game theory term for when someone goes, "I'm going to do that, this is going to happen and nothing can dissuade me from this course of action." It's a strong tactic which forces everyone to react to that person's position, reducing the others' options into a binary of either accepting that position or rejecting it. 

This is a very common tactic and various manifestations of it can be seen all over history and media. From Martin Luther who refused to recant or compromise with his famous words of “Here I stand, I cannot do otherwise” to groups who cultivate a "with us or against us" mentality to heroic characters who say they would die before giving in to whatever Evil the story focuses on.

This is the situation Dream is facing here. He can either accept Wilbur's assertion that L'manburg is an independent entity by either encouraging them or even doing nothing, or he can reject Wilbur's assertion by acting against it.

As we all know, he ended up choosing the second option but what were his considerations for doing so?

For that we would need to know what his goal was here, something we don't really get a sense of from his conversation with Wilbur. However, he ends up stating what it was in a later conversation with Skeppy. 

(Emphasis added by me and wasn’t part of the original dialogue.)

“Everyone can build wherever they want. [L’manburg] just decided to say that they get to determine where they can build and we can’t and we said well no, you can’t do that. And that’s what the whole war was over.” (31:44)

“[L’manburg] can’t tell us that we can’t go in their land. That’s all we wanted to say. That they’re not independent, they are a part of the Dream Team SMP. They’re just a delusional, small part." (34:26)

Dream lies a lot, so just because he says something doesn't mean it's necessarily true. However, this seems to be genuine. Dream has no problem telling Skeppy “we burned down their houses and blew up the whole land.” (32:36) later on in the conversation, so we can rule out that he's trying to paint himself in a better light, and there aren't really any other reasons for him to lie to Skeppy here about this. 

When looking at Dream's options with his goal we can see the choice is pretty much a no-brainer. 

Accepting is a total lose scenario for him. Not only will it fail to fulfill his goals, it would actively encourage the sort of behavior he doesn't want to happen, as Wilbur would set a precedent that so long as someone insisted hard enough and implied Dream is a bad person he would fold in negotiations and give them what they want.

Rejecting gets him far closer to his goal of railing against L’manburg’s exclusion. Going to war means he has to invest much more effort and resources into his reaction than if he just accepted as well as deal with the risks any war has, however the sheer difference in ability between Dream's side and Wilbur's side make the risk minimal. 

Going to a war he’s pretty sure he can win VS encouraging the sort of thing he disapproves of, isn’t really a hard choice.

This is actually the result of a mistake on Wilbur's part. CC!Wilbur called his character naive (37:49) and he's not wrong. Wilbur has a tendency to act as he wishes and not take into account that people might disagree or retaliate. We see it with him saying they could just ignore the Americans (1:51:17) or during the elections when he told Quackity his scheme and got blindsided by Quackity deciding to run against him. 

Historically, non-compromising positions worked best when the person who used it made sure rejection would be more costly than acceptance in one way or the other. In essence, narrowing down the options for others even more and leaving them only with acceptance. 

Wilbur may have managed to wipe off the table all other options and put pressure on Dream to accept with his use of Assumptive Close, but he didn't do anything to prevent Dream from rejecting. In fact, it seems like Wilbur didn't even consider it as a valid possibility as he outright dismissed it when Dream brought it up as an option.

Dream: “What happens if the rest of the server decides to take over your land?”

Wilbur: “They can’t. It’s literally not how servers- Dream you’re supposed to be smart man, that’s not how servers work. You can’t just take over another person’s server.” (54:33)

But, you may be asking, if it was better for Dream to go to war against L'manburg rather than grant them independence, why did he end up giving into their desire for independence in the war? Wouldn't it have been better if he just saved everyone the trouble and gave it to them when they asked for it the first time? Or maybe Dream’s obsession with Tommy and his discs is just that strong?

We can find the answer to all those questions at Punz’ video where he shows the behind the scenes of the independence war, including some of the planning which went into it from the Dream Team’s side of the war. Specifically, this quote:

Dream: “[The L’manburgians] are never gonna give up. So then in the end the resolution will probably just be, we won but they can think whatever they want, we’re just going to ignore them because they’re essentially like- You want to think you’re independent? You’re not, you’re still part of the SMP, but if you want to think you’re independent, you can.” (9:04)

“They’re never gonna give up.”

Whether it’s true or not doesn’t matter, as this is what Dream thinks and so this is what dictates his actions. Perhaps he’s overestimating his opponents here, or maybe he’s talking about how even if L’manburg is defeated this time they would try again for independence in the future. In either case, it’s clear Dream thinks the best case scenario for him - completely preventing people from fighting for L'manburg's independence - is impossible. 

So, he tries for the second best case. If he can’t prevent L’manburg, he’s going to allow it but only under Dream’s terms. That’s what his “they can think whatever they want” line is all about. He intends on giving them token independence here, something which would satisfy them but wouldn't pose a real threat. Which is exactly what he ends up offering them during the bow duel.

Dream: “Let me just clarify: if you win, we grant L’Manburg independence.”

Tommy: “Alright.”

Dream: “But we recognize it still as a part of the Dream Team SMP.”

Wilbur: “That’s fine, that’s a fine condition.” (40:54)

The token independence thing didn’t work out so well for him. L'manburg quickly grew to be seen as an entity separate from Greater Dream SMP by everyone, and so Dream was forced to concede and treat it as one as well. 

However, despite this part of his plan failing, overall the independence war was a glowing success for Dream. 

By giving L'manburg independence after winning the war, Dream sent a very clear message. L'manburg only gets to be independent so long as they stay on Dream's good side. If they don't adhere to the terms Dream sets out for them? He can and will kick their asses, as the war so aptly demonstrated.

This message is received loud and clear. During his entire presidency Wilbur went out of his way to treat Dream with respect and try not to piss him off. Something he clearly demonstrates a number of times, like when he asked if he should call Dream “king Dream” (59:08) or during the railway skirmish (24:16).

In fact, it can be argued that this message lasted all the way up to Tubbo's presidency. Unlike Quackity, who was perfectly fine with starting a fight with Dream, Tubbo knew first hand what a war against Dream looks like. He knew that they could not win a war against him, especially in their weakened state at the time, and that influenced his decision. 

As Dream once said: "L'manburg can be independent but it can't be free."

[blindbeta]

I have a question! Thank you for existing I deeply appreciate it. I was wondering if it is possible for a blind person to be able to read by learning the shape of raised letters, rather than braille. I ask because I have a situation in which it is reasonable that the blind character would know this, if possible, and the person they are travelling with is completely illiterate.I thought it might be interesting if the seeing character could describe the letters, or find a way to texture them so the blind character could tell them what something says. I have done a great deal of research for this character, but this is the one part I can't find a clear answer for. Thank you very much.

Good question, nonnie.

The short answer is, maybe? It would depend on the time period and location of your characters.

Since you want both characters to read, I’ll assume this culture has a formal writing system in place and values written communication.

A Brief History

In order to address this, allow me to offer a brief history of Braille. Because what you’re describing is exactly what happened in France before Braille was invented. This informative video summarizes it pretty well. Here is the text version of the video. The video mentions the embossed letter or raised type method of reading that was used at the time. It was difficult to read and the letters had to be very large in order to be understood, making it harder to read words and sentences. Reading must have been very slow.

According to this page on the National Braille Press website, reading this way required slowly tracing raised print letters. To write, one had to memorize the shapes and try to create them on paper, although they could not read the results.

Creating books was even more difficult. According to this page, [quote] “teacher Valentin Haüy made books with raised letters by soaking paper in water, pressing it into a form and allowing it to dry. Books made using this method were enormous and heavy, and the process was so time-consuming that l'Institution Royale des Jeunes Aveugles, or the Royal Institution for Blind Youth, had fewer than 100 of them when Louis Braille was a student there.” [End quote]

Braille books are already notorious for taking up several volumes. Large print books are only a little better. Textbooks used in schools take up several shelves to translate one print textbook.

Individual use and traveling with these things must have been impossible for the everyday person, even if you were a student.

Also, in this video by blind YouTuber Molly Burke, at the 9:05 time-stamp she answers the question: why don’t we raise print letters for blind people? She explains that it took too long to read and is not as efficient as Braille.

In the interest of time, I’ll try to keep this brief. The transition from the raised print letters to Braille was not a smooth one.

In 1826, first embossed letters published in English was James Gall’s triangular alphabet. Read about it and other systems here.

Another source says Gall’s writing system was introduced in 1831. The system did not gain much popularity outside of Endinburgh.

According to this page: [quote] “In 1832 The Society of Arts for Scotland held a competition for the best embossed type. There were 15 entries but Edmund Fry’s alphabetical system of roman capitals triumphed. Shortly afterwards John Alston began printing at the Glasgow Asylum for the Blind using a slightly modified version of Fry’s design. “Alston type” proved popular and inspired similar forms across Europe and North America.” [end quote]

None of these really caught on outside of certain areas.

In 1821, Charles Barbier was invited to the Royal National Institute For Blind Youth in Paris to demonstrate his Night Writing invention, which was developed for soldiers to read in the dark. It was too difficult to read and so was not used by soldiers, nor did it end up being used by the blind schools. However, a young Louis Braille was in the audience and was inspired.

In 1825, Braille thought he had figured out a good system of writing.

In 1829, he published the first Braille alphabet.

1834 - Braille is invited to Exposition of Industry in Paris, which extended the popularity of the Braille system.

1846- a school for the blind in Amsterdam starts using Braille’s system.

In 1852, Louis Braille dies.

1854- Royal National Institute For Blind Youth officially adopt Braille as official system after fighting it for years.

Because Braille didn’t take hold as quickly in Britain, the British and Foreign Blind Association, all of whom were blind, voted in 1870. They decided Braille was the best system. Braille quickly fell into use all over the world with the exception of the United States. By 1882, the embossed letter system was over.

In the U.S, from 1868-1918, the New York Point system was used. American Braille (developed by a blind teacher named Joel W. Smith) was also used from 1878 to 1918, when the U.S switched the standardized English Braille.

Would Your Character Know Raised Type?

Remember how I said you might be able to do this depending on the time period and place?

If you have French characters, you can used the raised type method as you described in your ask if the story takes place before, probably, 1825. It would be reasonable for your character to know the raised type method if they had attended a blind school before the Braille method was adopted in 1854. Between roughly 1829 and 1854, the French blind character attending school would know about the Braille system and probably complain about their school not teaching it despite Braille himself teaching there.

Similarly, they could used raised type depending on where the story is set, when the character attended school, and what system was in place at the time. If the story is a fantasy, you could make up a history similar to what I described above, although it would be important to have schools for the blind and have Braille or the equivalent be created by a blind character.

Remember that your blind character needs to learn the raised type method if you want them to use it.

If Braille would be available in real life (such as a more modern setting), I would prefer a blind character use Braille instead. Which is why I tried to offer alternatives that were historically justified.

I don’t feel very comfortable with a blind character having to use a raised type method rather than another system, because Braille literacy is declining nowadays and something about learning a raised type method over Braille (or other system, depending on where you set the story and what they were using at the time) doesn’t sit right with me. Your character doesn’t have to use Braille specifically, but I would rather they use the system that is available to blind people at that time. For example, if your story is set in the United States, it would be fine to use American Braille or the New York Point, depending on the time period.

If your story is modern, blind people can usually read raised print letters on signs, such as for the bathroom. In fact, a lot of people who can’t read Braille get by this way. However, keep in mind that we have screen-readers and audiobooks now. People aren’t reading entire texts or even many words with this method.

As for other countries, I tried my best to research what places, such as Japan, used before Braille. For several reasons, including the European-centric search results that keep coming up over and over again, finding the correct information is proving difficult. In some cases, previous methods may have unfortunately been lost due to colonization. It is important that we acknowledge that.

I feel that it would be easier to leave the research up to you since you know where you want to set your story and your own personal background, historical knowledge, etc.

Keep in mind that not all blind people in the world had access to formal education, depending on the place, time, their social class, etc. If you want your blind character to know how to read, you’ll need to find or create a setting that allows for it.

Generally, I would prefer blind characters use methods designed for blind people, whatever that happens to be in that time or culture. Prioritizing the other characters’ needs and having a blind character learn raised type over Braille when Braille actually exists in the story doesn’t work for me.

Like always, I suggest having more than one blind character in the story to avoid tokenism. Also, since your character is going to teach another character, be sure to show your blind character’s needs and goals as well.

I hope this helps. Feel free to message me or send another ask. I am not a historian and so if anyone wants to correct anything, such as dates, or provide any relevant knowledge, please feel free. I tried my best with this question. I would be grateful for help if anyone has more information!

-BlindBeta

[smhalltheurlsaretaken]

one thing I have grown tired about in the fandom is the constant anakin apologism. I'm always finding posts that that that if anakin had less contact with palpatine or if he had another master or is his mother had gained her freedom or if he had felt like he was not an outcast inside the order because he was old as a padawan, he would have not fallen. I personally that is baseless apologism to someone that was basically a sith trying to act like if he was a jedi but I wanted to know your opinion

I mean... 

I get it. I get defending Anakin, or trying to find ways he wouldn’t have made the choices he did. Anakin being a good person is a very important part of the Prequels, and we can’t take that away from his character. 

Well, a lot of people got very upset, saying he should’ve been this little demon kid. But the story is not about a guy who was born a monster – it’s about a good boy who was loving and had exceptional powers, but how that eventually corrupted him and how he confused possessive love with compassionate love. That happens in Episode II: Regardless of how his mother died, Jedi are not supposed to take vengeance. And that’s why they say he was too old to be a Jedi, because he made his emotional connections. His undoing is that he loveth too much.

George Lucas, 2005 interview

Perhaps not the best quote to illustrate the point, but just look at TCW - where Anakin is admittedly quite different from his movie portrayal, but whose characterization was still overseen and approved by Lucas. 

I disagree that Anakin wasn’t a Jedi. He was one. Sith just don’t care about the evil they do and the suffering they cause - Anakin, up to Order 66, absolutely knew right from wrong and wanted to choose the right path more often that not, and he did understand Jedi teachings. 

AotC: I’m a Jedi. I know I’m better than this.

RotS: Something is wrong. I’m not the Jedi I should be. 

(Of course, the flipside is that Anakin knowing right from wrong means he is all the more responsible for his own actions. Here’s an excellent meta by @david-talks-sw on the subject). 

So I understand explaining Anakin’s actions and empathizing with him. The Prequels are a tragedy, according to Lucas (said multiple times, including in the interview I linked). In a tragedy, watching the hero fall is meant to be painful because he’s a hero. The problem is, the line between explaining an action and justifying can be blurry, and understanding Anakin’s pain and confusing can be understood as dismissing his actions when they’re not the same thing. 

But I very much agree that bending the circumstances around Anakin’s choices instead of talking about Anakin’s own character is missing the point. In fact, we have a very good example to show that Anakin’s fall wasn’t only tied to external events - Mortis. Although I would never pretend I understand Mortis any better than any other viewer, one thing still sticks out to me as self-evident. Anakin chooses to fall when presented with something he can’t deal with. 

In RotS, he cannot accept the possible loss of Padmé, so he surrenders to his fear - he chooses the easy path of relinquishing control and letting someone else and something else take over instead of fighting his impulses and of controlling his emotions. On Mortis, despite knowing what the Son is and what he did to Ahsoka and his own sister, Anakin cannot deal with the knowledge that he will Fall, and so he lets the Son take the lead and he falls. 

In both cases, Anakin’s actions are very much his own. The Son didn’t ‘infect’ him like he did Ahsoka, he let him choose. 

I do think Anakin showed many of the qualities that should have made him an excellent Jedi. The Jedi certainly thought highly of him, with how often they called him and Obi-Wan their best team, or trusted him with high-stakes missions. Maybe I’ll defend that later, but in the movies and TCW they definitely counted him as one of their best.

Anakin was compassionate, brave, and idealistic. He was also incredibly egocentric - as in, saw the world as how it impacted him, and saw people as how they mattered to him. 

So yeah, I get loving him, I get liking him, and I get wanting him to do better, and to grow to become a better person. I don’t agree with stripping him of agency and responsibility for his actions. He was young, but he was a competent young adult with the tools to know and do better. His story is also a tragedy, so we’re meant to understand him and feel for him, because else there’d be no point to RotJ. 

But hey, I certainly rip into his shitty choices often enough on this blog - I had to cut him some slack here for the sake of nuance. 

[wingzie]

Brutally Honest Reactions to Jikook

It was requested on Twitter that I talk about the less positive posts about Jikook moments from my live reactions research. These will NOT include any screenshots, but I will discuss what I saw. I will continue to keep posting positive things about Jikook, but the fandom reaction towards Jikook is one of the reasons why I feel so strongly about supporting them so much. Please read ahead if you are interested. I will also keep it out of the Jikook tag.

I will quickly add my own experience here before I continue. I am an early 2019 ARMY. I didn't follow any BTS accounts on Twitter until after I caught up on content. I then started following Jikook accounts once I got braver, because I could see a clear difference in the way the fandom talked about them. (Or not at all in some cases.) It wasn't until I started following Jikook accounts, that I knew about GCF Tokyo. For a fandom that hyped up Jungkook being a director for LGO, his previous work and especially GCFT is rather ignored. Especially when it's obvious that Jungkook has always had an interest in making videos. 

GCFT

An important factor here is that GCFT was posted after Jimin's lovely twitter edit. From what I saw, no one had any real issues with Jimin's edit. The general consensus was that it was sweet that Jimin and Jungkook were finally able to go on a trip together and that Jimin made an edit out of it. But if that's the case, why were there then issues when GCFT was posted, that are still here today?

Compared to Jimin's edit, there is a clear sense of jealousy when GCFT was released. A "sweet trip" turned into a "not big deal" or started to include fake narratives. Some of which really confused me at first, until I asked someone at the time and got the truth. 

There is a sudden change of tone aimed towards Jikook: “How dare they go on a trip together?” and “how dare they share it with us this way?.”  It's clear to me that this jealously suddenly began because of the editing style, the camera shots and the song used. All of which made you feel a certain way when watching GCFT, if you were not so blind or bitter. However, the fandom did it's best to try to belittle JK's work. Saying excuses such as the song was not intentional or that the editing choices were coincidental. That's not the case at all and to quote a certain song "this is no coincidence."

There is an interesting notion that some shippers and y/n's turned to fan fictions after GCFT was released. This suggests to me that they did indeed in fact feel the same way about GCFT. They got the message loud and clear, but had to try to tune it out with another fantasy because of what they felt. They wanted what Jimin and Jungkook had for themselves or another member.

GCF's after GCFT

After GCFT there was a need to show: "look Jimin and Jungkook aren't that close." Which Jikook didn't get the memo of and it shows that people were keeping an eye on them. However, this was only to be able justify their negative thoughts about the possibility of two men being together. They couldn't stand the idea and came up with every excuse possible to deny it. There were a fair amount of “don’t assume their sexuality” posts floating around.

There was also a definite shift after GCFT with Jikooker’s themselves. Of course they were supportive, but much more discreet about it. Afterwards though ,and up through to today, they got louder about Jimin and Jungkook's bond. It's clear this reflects in the fandom perception of them together as a unit or just on the timeline itself. There is almost an annoyance whenever they show up.

The newer GCF’s turned more into a competition between the members. Something which sadly continued even with the Life Goes On MV. Rather than seen as a cute maknae trip in Osaka, GCFO was used as leverage against Jikook to prove that they weren't that close. Which is bizarre in itself and it was like Jimin wasn't in the video at all.

The outrage that sparked when GCFH was released showed the true hypocrisy of the fandom. Jungkook set the tone beautifully to match the Winter Package location of Helsinki. The fact so many quickly jumped on this, but ignored his skills previously is very telling. For all those yelling about appreciating Jungkook, they only yell when it's about making themselves feel better about something. 

Rose Bowl. I don't need to introduce this. However what I found interesting is that people outside of ARMY were more accepting of what happened than actual ARMY.  It also made me question what the definition of "ot7" is,  because these accounts were going around underneath posts with "stop shipping”, “they're just bros" or my most hated one "they do stuff like this in South Korea all the time."

The last one is an absolute hate of mine and is always used by NON Koreans. ARMY are often all about Korean culture until it's something they don't want to hear or know about. A general translation account has already pointed out that Jikook are extremely close due to lack of honorifics and it moe or less got ignored. Another account will mention the same , but for another unit, and it's worshiped to high heaven. Yet Jikooker’s are delusional for being the ones to understand the cultural significance of it?

Jungkook's Birthday in 2019

I am actually going to be calling out Jikooker’s here because the reverse happened this time. Others found Jimin’s Birthday video sweet, whereas Jikooker’s were being extremely rude and disrespectful ON the timeline towards Jimin about it. Plus the usual "Jikook broke up" malarkey that pops up twice a month happened. I only recently started researching this and I’m not even sure I can make a thread on it, because there was so much fighting on the Timeline about the Birthday video.

This is what spurred me on to write my twitter post about being careful about what you post and where your priorities lie. A lot of Jikooker’s were upset before Jimin posted. Not because "he hasn't posted.”, but because "he hasn't posted [for me]." 

This is something that Jikooker’s have to wrap their heads around. We only see a tiny percentage of their daily lives. They also have each other's phone number and see each other daily. They also know each other extremely well and probably better than any of us actually will. It is not up to us what they post or what we see. Do we miss them? Of course. However, to instantly start hating them for that is wrong. You're acting just like the fandom first did when GCFT came out. These same people also acted like nothing had happened as soon as Jimin posted the photo of Jungkook later on.

Seoul Final

For those that don't remember Rose, she was a k-army translator that went to Seoul Final. In one of her live shows afterwards, she explained how other Karmy were surprised by Jikook's closeness on stage. It wasn't just us.

However ,on Naver, there was a storm brewing about Jimin treating Jungkook inappropriately and the way they were acting on stage. This was first started by Jungkook akages and then spread around to some of the fandom who decided to jump in. 

This is one example of people using K-army as a weapon. That they know *best* when they suffer the same on their side with solos etc... It's also another example of the hatred towards Jimin. 

This isn't something new. Shipping was fairly peaceful and kept its original definition of wanting two people to be together. Even if this did include two real people. It wasn't until the definition of shipping morphed into something new and possibly real, that things started to erupt in the fandom. And this eruption was sadly placed onto Jimin, as people saw him as a disruption to their fantasies. 

This defamation of both Jimin and Jungkook's character from the fandom has been present since the beginning. They are seen as liars or not intelligent. That their closeness is fake, even though you can clearly see it from the start and then develop over the years. It's something that has always been beautiful to witness whilst watching, old content and new.

These examples of fandom reactions I have used are ones all related to expectations. If Jimin and Jungkook do not act as expected or they shock the fandom, one side will react negatively. The fandom also do not seem to like seeing Jikook be so loud, so to speak. And with the emergence of more Jikooker’s on social media, this horrid view of them will no doubt increase  Though many hate the term Jikook. It signifies the unit of Jimin and Jungkook and no matter what, they will do what they want too and continue to do so. Thank you for reading and feel free to ask questions if you have any!

[rpd-rookie]

The One Who Runs Away, The One Who Runs Back (Leon S. Kennedy x Reader)

Author’s note: This is a sequel to “A PAST WITH HER, A FUTURE WITH YOU” and the end of my three-parts fan fiction "I TRUSTED YOU WITH MY HEART" I decided to write after so many of you asked for it. Sorry it took so long but I was navigating from one fandom to another. (BTW, if there are any Devil May Cry fans up here, you can read my DMC fan fictions here) PS: Even if I said it before, I have no hate whatsoever towards Ada or Aeon.

Tagged: Angst, Fluff, Romance, Post-Break up, Sexual Content 

Part 1 / Part 2

***

Do you remember? We started this story by quoting some sitcom character that was clueless about love. Well, here’s a suggestion. Why not ending it by quoting someone who knew a little more on such matter.

William Shakespeare - you know that English dude expert on tragic ‘drink this poison, stab yourself’ kind of love - apparently once said ‘Love runs away from those chasing her, and those who run away, she throws herself on his neck’. I say ‘apparently’ cause, even though I have a master in English lit, this quote is from the internet, and also … who knows what the guy truly said?

But it’s the quote that’s important. Not the author. The quote it’s important because it sums up perfectly how this story is gonna end. However, before starting, let me tell you this quote is going to be the only Shakespeare-worthy sentence in this final chapter. You’ve been warned.

Love runs away from those chasing her.          Well, this part was definitely written for someone like Ada Wong. Owner of countless gold medals and possibly a world record at this point, that woman is basically the Usain Bolt of the ‘Running from Leon S. Kennedy’ competition. Unchallenged winner since the creation of this sultry version of cat and mouse game, it’s better not to think about the number of times she successfully ran away from her favourite agent.  But this year, this formidable titleholder in a gorgeous red dress will have to face her Nemesis in the championship. You. Though the comparison to the hideous bio-organic killing machine might not be very complimentary to you but you get the idea.  This year you enter the Kennedy Olympics. And this year you run like Sonic the Hedgehog and you win the damn competition (screw you Usain Bold!). And you do this with your head high and without an ounce of regret. Ignore all the texts and flowers Leon might send on your track Mario Kart style. His gifts are not as slippery as banana peels and they can easily be dodged, I promise. Well, most of the time, when you’re not lying on your bed in the middle of the night crying and sobbing while reading his messages or playing his voice in your voicemail again and again until you’re nothing more but a giant mess with puffy red eyes drowning in a puddle of your own tears.        Screw those messages too! And screw his broken yet terribly sexy voice as well!

Being a man of word, Leon kept his promise. And for months you kept on running peacefully, marathoning away from this past relationship that had destroyed you like no other before while tranquilly fixing your broken heart on the way. That run was a good cardio.

But sometimes, cardio is not enough, and even just the small sight of an overpriced whisky bottle or the smell of Leon’s perfume on some guy’s clothes is enough to reopen your wounds.           And when it happens, you always do the same thing, you break the damn bottle - and run cause damn! it’s expensive! -  or you tell the guy his perfume smells like cheap cologne and that he should definitely change it, which is an improvement on your past destructive behaviour, since there was a time shortly after the break up when you would have simply dragged the guy to your place to let him fuck you senseless while imagining he was Leon. All that just for the illusion to feel him again and for the sake to kick him out the next morning, screaming like a hysterical psycho.

So imagine, for a small second, the wave of intense feelings surging out of your healing heart when, in the middle of a cafe, you hear some dude sitting behind you ordering Leon’s favourite whisky while wearing the same bloody perfume. “It’s got to be relentless persecution at that point!” You sigh, already annoyed, closing your book more violently than intended. Hope you’re ready, stranger! Because you’re not in the mood to deal with this right now.            You turn around with a fake smile that reflects perfectly your irritation, ready to give him hell, your sharpest riposte already burning your tongue. After all, he deserves it and you can’t help it.         But when you meet familiar – and freaking gorgeous - baby blue eyes you freeze and stare, suddenly confused and lost and refusing to believe that in spite of the intense running, love just jumped at your neck after all and it was sitting there, taking the shape of Leon S(tupid) Kennedy.

You should have stood up and left, run for your life, run for your heart. And yet, you didn’t.    You stayed there staring at him looking at you, allowing all your memories, the good ones and the bad ones, all your buried feelings to come back from the dead, embracing them as if you had missed them, which, let’s be honest, you probably had.            You tried to scream to yourself “Come on, Y/N! Shake a leg!” but it seemed that what you brain understood was something like “Cum on him! Open your legs!” as a couple of blurry hours later, you were on Leon’s bed, legs wide open, screaming his name and begging him not to stop his amazing thrusts.

Six months, you ran for six months … Well, looks like the run ends here and now. After a minute-long deep stare, an afternoon of amazing sex and two hours long of something blurry in between.

“I missed you.” And there you were! The moment all couples that broke up have after one of them (in this case Leon with the infamous ‘I missed you line’) starts to believe they miraculously rekindled their love. The fatal post-coital cuddling session that you don’t know how to react to, as you think of all the possibilities before you.      Possibility Number 1) You tell Leon you missed him too and cuddle, enjoying that embrace you secretly yearned for months. But that includes forgetting what he has done or pretending that nothing happened.     Possibility Number 2) You push him away, get dressed, leave again and act as if this afternoon never happened. But if Leon doesn’t remind you of it, the ache between your legs will, that’s for sure!   Possibility Number 3) You jump him again until you sore even more and hope that you’ll be able to leave afterwards.         Frankly, all possibilities suck because, in all cases, it seems like you lose. Since,       with Possibility Number 1) you lose the run forever, with Possibility Number 2) you lose him again and with Possibility Number 3) well it’s result 1 or 2 + your body aching like crazy for days. I suck at math but no need to be Einstein to know the result of this calculation looks unpleasant.    So what do you choose?

You see a triangular dice rolling in your head, showing a never-ending succession of 1, 2 and 3 that doesn’t make any sense and that confuse you even more than you already are. 1, 2, 3, 2, 1, 3, 2 ! Oh for fuck’s sake!

You grimace, angry and pissed at Leon and probably even more at yourself, and finally leaves his bed and his strong warm arms, feeling the tears furiously forming in your eyes. “I can’t” You can’t look at him in the eyes. You don’t want to see his confusion, don’t want to see his pain as he witnesses all his hopes shatter to pieces.         “ What do you mean?” You can hear the sheets crease behind you, alerting you of Leon’s agitation, so you hurry and pick up all your clothes scattered in his room. You must leave, now. 2! 2 it is!  “This! All This! This afternoon never happened.” You tell him, putting on your clothes with sudden clumsy and trembling hands, not caring if your bra is correctly hooked or if you put your shirt on back to front. Your heart. You have to think of your poor heart first.          “Hey, hey, hey.” You feel Leon’s hand softly grabbing your arms and you let go of whatever you were holding right now. His voice is sweet and trying to be comforting. Don’t look at him Y/N! Don’t look at him! “Look at me.” You do. Damn it! And you see his gorgeous blue eyes staring at you, studying your flustered face and the tears slowly drowning your (colour) look. You missed those eyes. You missed them so.damn.much ! As much as you missed his hands cupping your face and his thumbs wiping up your tears. God! How many tears those thumbs have missed recently. “It’s alright.”

You want to believe him. You really do. But there is this voice screaming in your head and very clearly this time. A voice shouting, forcing you to remember that night, that awful nightmarish night, the one when you felt your heart break and your dreams turn to ashes. All that because of him and his obsession for her.

“No, it’s not alright, Leon.” You shake your head and miraculously manage to take a small step back. You never thought you could. But you had to. You can’t stay close to him. You can’t let him touch you, feel you. Not if you want to run away. And you have to run away. Like her! Like Ada. Ada! “I told you. For as long as you have feelings for Ada, I can’t … we can’t…”     “Please don’t talk about her.” He begs and rubs his hand over his face. Is he trying to chase her away from his mind? Is she still in here? Please, let her not be in here.    “But she’s the reason we’re in this situation now. She’s the reason why we’re in this mess.” You insist only for the sake to see his reaction when you mention Ada, to see if she’s still under his skin, somewhere. “Ada is not the reason. I am!” Leon corrects you, a finger directed at his heavy chest as he is putting the full blame on himself for the first time since that night. “I am the one who went after Ada when I shouldn’t have! I am the reason why we broke up! I am the reason why we are so miserable!”         “But I was fine!” You shouted back in an attempt to show him he was wrong refusing to listen to that part of you who knew he was completely right. You were miserable without him. “I was doing fine until you came back and fucked everything up! I was healing goddamnit!”             You felt new tears rolling along your red cheeks and quickly wipe them off with the back of your hand that felt so callous and rough in comparison to Leon’s gentle touch. “You can’t just jump back into my life like this and expect me to forget!”

Leon nods, agreeing with you in a certain way. But the truth is, he doesn’t want you to forget. He doesn’t expect you to erase his mistake. He just wants you to forgive him … No, he just wants you to come back to him. Period. And that’s got to be what you want to. It has to!   “So why did you have sex with me, huh?” He finally asks even though he already knows your answer. “Tell me!” You’re not the kind of person who has meaningless sex, not the kind of person who worships one’s body with divine kisses and devoted caresses if they mean nothing. “Why did you have sex with me?” And yet the answer he wishes to hear doesn’t come out. “For fuck’s sake Y/N! Answer me! Why?” He shouts making you shiver and cry even more.    “Because I LOVE YOU!” You finally scream. And it hurts. It hurts but it feels good too. Like a weight lifted off your chest. “Because I missed you too! Because those months without you have been terrible! Because I don’t know how to handle even just the thought of you or the sound of your voice in my voicemail. Because each time I see something that makes me think of you, I’m a mess and I do things that normal me would never do! You fucked me up, Leon! You fucked me up but I love you! And I hate to love you!” You grunt in pain and relief, enraged but happy that you finally let everything out. And Leon listens in silence, frozen by your powerful honest confession. But he doesn’t know how to react. He doesn’t know what to say. Part of him is overjoyed, ecstatic that you still love him but there is another part that just feels terrible, sorry for the pain your love for him caused you even in his absence.   “But you see—“ You continue “That’s the problem in our relationship, Leon! I love you in ways that are so intense, that go beyond sanity. And you love me by half.”    You see him crumple, his horrified face looking suddenly very pale as if he had just heard some dreadful news. Is that really how you feel? Is that how you see his love for you? Is that what he has made you believe?         “Goodbye Leon.”

With the full intention to leave Leon’s place for good and never come back, you grab you bag on your way out of the bedroom while carelessly shoving your underwear inside of it since you forgot to put them on in the midst of panic and precipitation. Get out of here, Y/N! Now! A reasonable voice encourages you. Listen to me!    But this not what Leon wants.

“I never loved you by half.” He declares and you abruptly stop, asking God if he’s some kind of sadist that loves seeing you in pain from the comfort of his divine sofa somewhere in heaven. “Never.” But it’s not God and his sadism that makes you turn around. It’s you, and your masochist love for that blue-eyed man before you.     “I don’t believe you” Your voice almost doesn’t leave your throat as you try not to sob.           “But it’s the truth.” He says with a calm soothing voice as he slowly approaches you. “I never imagined my future with Ada. I never wished to grow old with her or build a home with her.” You want to tell Leon to stop talking, to stay where he is but your body doesn’t seem to respond. And when you feel him grabbing your hands in his and the comforting warmth that goes with that simple touch, you know that leaving is now an almost impossible task. “Yes. I admit it. My feelings for her were real.” Even when his honesty hurts you, you don’t know how to leave anymore. “But they were nothing in comparison to what I feel for you.”     You try to let go, pulling your hands away from his loving grip but he holds you back. And you’re not strong enough. Or maybe, you just don’t want to be strong. Everything is so confusing. Everything is tearing you apart.     “But they’re still here, aren’t they?” You question, hoping his answer might give you a clue, might give you the strength to make the correct decision. Do you leave? Or do you stay? “And they’ll keep coming back each she goes back into your life. You can’t let go of her.”    “You’re maybe right.” His words hurt you more than you thought they would. They hurt like hell because you realise there are not the ones you wanted to hear. You wanted to hear him say that he would let go of Ada, for good, for you. You wanted to hear that because deep down … YOU WANTED TO FUCKING STAY! “But can you let go of your past?” He continues and you shake your head refusing to hear any other word coming out of Leon’s mouth.       “Don’t!” You beg, weary.           “No! Listen to me this time. Ada is my past, Y/N. She’s my past. And you … you’re my future. You’re my life, damn it!” He doesn’t cry but you don’t need his tears to sense how emotional and how honest he is. And suddenly, you just want to listen to him. “And I was a fool not to see it sooner. When you left me, I felt a void I had never felt in my entire life. I felt like a part of me was missing. And then, the bombing in Washington happened, and it was like I had nothing left. I needed you. I wanted you. You. Not Ada.”      “Leon” You whisper and he cups your face again, blue eyes staring deep into yours, allowing you to see everything in him, his strong love for you and all the weaknesses he hated to admit. “It was you in my mind. Only you. And it will always be you. Because I love you. Now. Today. And I will always love you.”

You cry even more, uncertain if those tears are tears of sorrow, tears of joy or a mix of both. God, how can your emotions be such a mess right now? How can you be wishing to shout at him with all the anger you’ve accumulated and, at the same time, willing to kiss him with all love you’ve got?

“If you got to believe something. Believe that. And if that’s not enough and you think you can be happy with someone else. Then go. I won’t hold you back.” You frown. He is fucking lying. You’re sure of it. “You can’t stop running after me and you know it.” He smiles and scoffs, sensing that hint of sudden defiance in your tone he enjoys a lot.  “True. I can’t sop running after you. But I’ll do my best not to catch you if that’s what you want. But you got to tell me. Is that what you truly want?” You don’t reply. Truth is, you’re not sure what to say not because you’re not sure that’s what you want but because you’re not sure you can trust him if you let him in again.                        “No.” You whisper. “No, that’s not what I want. I want you. All of you.” You can see Leon struggle to contain his growing joy as it starts to glimmer brighter and brighter in his irises. He doesn’t want to cry victory just yet. He is cautious and rightfully so. “But can I?”        “Want me?” He smiles. “ Have you completely?” You correct, searching for a promise in his eyes, one you hope, you wish he would not break this time.     “Trust me with your heart again and find out.”

This better not hurt this time…

[whump-town]

Was Hotch Abused?

I offer you my 2,300+ worded thoughts on the matter with episodes included. There's going to be lots and lots of talk about abuse so you're going to want to steer clear of that if that's something you're not cool with but for those of you interested... I give you all the proof I could think of:

Natural Born Killer.

In the eighth episode of the first season, “Natural Born Killer”, we meet Vincent Perrotta. His father was abusive but from the outside looking in, no one knew a thing. Perrotta started drinking at fourteen and committed petty crimes, as well as assault, for pleasure. Going as far as to kill his own father not too long after. But Perrotta is a monster and a psychopath so it’s clear we’re not supposed to sympathize which makes his interaction with Hotch so peculiar.

Hotch is our “Captain America”. A true neutral with an infinity for doing what’s right so it’s inconceivable to compare him to Perrotta and yet Hotch gives us some rather conflicting lines to dissect.

Before Gideon hands the interview over to Hotch, he spends a moment talking with the others out in the bullpen. The whole time he’s leaned back and he’s watching Morgan and Hotch. Now, at this point, we don’t know about the sexual abuse Derek Morgan faced at the hands of Carl Buford but there’s something about the way that Gideon spends the entirety of the conversation only looking at the two of them. Waiting for them to put together what he clearly already has and when Hotch does…

Hotch jumps straight into Perrotta’s profile, asking: “You grew up in a house that looked normal and happy, didn’t you Vincent?”, “But your father beat you every chance he got”

Perrotta excuses it with a shrug, “he smacked me around some, didn’t everybody’s old man?”

Abuse is a complicated thing and, often, abused children just don’t know what their parents are doing to them is abuse. It can be a subtle and outright thing but there’s an element of normalcy to it. The parent’s abuse is as habitual, as minimal as biting your nails to the child. Adults often can’t identify their parent’s past abuse.

With Hotch you learn that his lack of expression is often as telling as his expressions and as Hotch looks back at Perrotta, there’s something so sad about his eyes. His voice goes from loud, assertive to his whispered answer to Perrotta’s question. “No.” As if, well, maybe that’s a question he’d raised once too.

Perrotta doesn’t care about that though and he taunts “well, maybe if yours had you would have learned to fight”. But is it not more telling that Hotch didn’t make a sound? Perrotta got in several hits and the only sound Hotch made was when the wind was literally punched out of him. Not even when Gideon called to him and at that point, Perrotta did not the garrote around Hotch’s throat. That’s another thing mentioned before in the profile and something Hotch mentions to Perrotta directly. You learn to take the beatings, smile even. So, it’s just a little odd how little Hotch responded…

But that’s all nothing, you can take that how you want

Which leads us to the fateful, not everyone comment.

"You were just responding to what you learned, Vincent. When you grow up in an environment like that, an extremely abusive and violent household... it's not surprising that some people grow up to become killers"

That can’t mean NOTHING, there’s so much there but there’s something about Hotch’s subtle wording. The way he’s unconsciously slipped himself in there (a very real thing that people do) and he hasn’t even realized it. Doesn’t even know he’s done it until Perrotta pushes and he pauses, asks what Perrotta means. And the subtly of it, the way he doesn’t even mean to that says more than anything else.

“And some people grow up to catch them.”

It’s a super-specific comment to make. He can’t possibly be talking about Derek because he doesn’t even know about Carl Buford yet not to mention saying that about him would be incredibly rude if he were talking about Reid (and again, he doesn’t know about Reid’s childhood yet). So… that really only leaves him because JJ, Garcia, and Elle were not abused.

“P911”

In season two, episode two “P911” the team is hunting down a man trying to sell a young boy, Peter, on the black market. Kevin Rose is an underage boy “selling” himself on the internet while his abusive father has been in prison. I’ll let you just guess who it is that leads the team on finding out more about Kevin.

Your guess is more than likely right-- Morgan and Hotch. Now, we know about Morgan but come on. Nothing to say about it being Hotch who makes the emotional appeal?

The camera even follows his gaze, he’s crouched down (to appear non-threatening because he’s so close) and we watch his eyes take in the scars on Kevin’s chest. You can also note that while Gideon remarks that Kevin’s father was “always drunk, you never knew why he was hurting you, why he was so angry” both Kevin and Hotch look away from him.

AND FUCKING TRY AND TELL ME THE “some grow up to catch them” LINE WAS NOTHING TRY BECAUSE GUESS WHAT GIDEON SAYS? NO, NO GUESS--

Gideon: “At night you’d cry yourself to sleep hoping someone would come and save you”

And it’s HOTCH, HOTCH IS THE ONE TO SAY: “You have the chance to be the one who saves someone, Kevin. You can be the one who answers him, the one who stops his pain.”

PARALLELS PEOPLE THE PARALLELS

“Profiler, Profiled”

I bet you weren’t expecting this one, huh? But there’s something about people who faced trauma that makes it so perceptible to other traumatized people-- they sniff it out like coke to a drug hound. And, just guess, who it is that spends the majority of his time fighting with Morgan? Who knows (like I said about the bloodhound) immediately there is something Morgan’s hiding.

Hotch is angry, he’s upset that Morgan would hide anything. Mumbling about there being “larger implications” and how the team can’t have secrets. With the knowledge of exactly what that secret is it makes Gideon’s eye roll a little telling. Because it’s like they both know but neither will say. Driven home by Gideon turning the attention to Hotch, asking “would you want us profiling you?”

And again Hotch is the one to leap onto the abuse. The one to put the pieces together. Hotch’s anger makes no sense. He says he’s angry that Derek’s keeping a secret but the team has many, way too many. Over the years the team unwraps all kinds of secrets, he’s never angry then. So, it’s not about the implication of a secret at all. It’s what the secret is, like misplaced anger. Anger with himself may be leftover from his own abuse. But still…

Hotch lets Morgan escape. Knows exactly who and what Carl Buford is but all he tells the team is that “he won’t even speak about him”. He always knows how to find the abuse… like I said, a bloodhound.

George Foyet

I know you’re going to find this so fucking surprising but guess who also was abused? George Foyet was beaten by his biological father and his mother didn’t save him so he hates women (bleh, men are disgusting what’s knew).

Now, blah, blah, blah Hannah, I know you’re not about to say Foyet and Hotch are a lot alike-- no of course not. Don’t be silly. What I’m going to say is that they’re foil characters? They accent one another in an opposites sort of way. Foyet is a manipulative narcissist who doesn’t work well with others. Hotch is a guilt-ridden team leader who can’t let The Reaper’s case go. There are meant to be comparisons drawn between them. A good villain does that. George Foyet shows us that Hotch is not at all this removed, cool guy that we’ve previously assumed him to be. He cries in an alley because he blames himself when The Reaper kills a busload of people.

We see he has a rather compulsive nature. He never let The Reaper case go and has very personal ties in this case. Not even after Foyet attacks him, if anything it’s worse. He brings the case file home.

But it’s certainly interesting to see yet another “villain” with that same tragic abusive father and submissive mother come into play with Hotch. We’re nearing a point where it’s getting hard to call it coincidence (and according to David Rossi, there simply is not such thing).

Haunted.

In the second episode of the fifth season, “Haunted”, Hotch voice’s over a Dickinson quote: “One need not be a chamber to be haunted, One need not be a house; The brain has corridors surpassing. Material place.” These quotes are often cheesy, if not a little cliché, but given the premise of this episode is in exploring the ways in which a man’s traumatic childhood has left him now grappling for a truth he can not define… well, maybe we can say the writers were onto something here.

Darrin Call, debatably the Unsub of “Haunted”, was abused by an alcoholic father. We see several signs of it throughout the episode-- Darrin’s delayed speech & severe neglect that leaves Darrin in dirty, hole-riddled clothing. If what we see is not enough, the reports that the team is given on Darrin explicitly state that he was extremely physically abused. It is this abuse that leads to the PTSD that he’s diagnosed with.

As sad and disheartening as Darrin Call’s life is, overall it’s the sort of episode that is forgotten over time. When it’s placed right after the episode that viewers have to watch Hotch say goodbye to Haley and Jack then, who is Darrin Call when compared to the agony of watching Hotch show genuine weakness? After watching Hotch lay in a hospital bed, tears in his eyes wondering if his son will remember him? His fears become our own and after watching George Foyet disarm and mutilate the one guy we’ve been led to believe for five seasons is infallibly, unflinchingly never going to break… well, Darrin Call has it bad but our focus is elsewhere.

It’s on Hotch, right?

The guy who is coming back to the job after only a month (and a day) off to recover. Who Morgan worries might have PTSD but he knows they can’t easily measure because Hotch wrote the questionnaire, he knows all the right answers. Who we see has had new locks installed since the attack and has Foyet’s file sitting open on a table for easy access. Who hears Darrin Call’s life (worked the same job without promotion for years before getting fired, no wife, no kids, a hermit) and bluntly asks why Darrin hasn’t just killed himself.

And let’s just take a moment to break down that comment. Hotch, who in the episode previously lost his wife and child, wants to know why a man who is steadily starting to sound a lot like him hasn’t just killed himself.

And I don’t say “sounds a lot like him” lightly.

Darrin Call has PTSD. Hotch, more than likely, has PTSD

Here are some signs just from that episode: hostility (he yelled at Garcia over something very small), self-destructive behavior (he ran into Darrin Call’s father’s house without a vest, back-up, or telling the other’s what he was doing), and guilt (blamed himself for missing the eye twitching Darrin exhibited because of his years of antipsychotic use)

Darrin Call was abused… this marks the second HEAVILY implied time that Hotch has been compared to another man abused by his father

Vincent Perrotta was the first with that hard to forget the exchange

George Foyet and his notably exactly the same past as Perrotta

“Haunted” feels like it’s supposed to prove to the audience that Hotch is losing it. He distances himself from Morgan, leaving every room that Morgan is in. He doesn’t pick up Garcia’s calls after Darrin Call attacks his therapist. The only glimpse we see of the old Hotch is with Emily, pulled to the side, but his guilt burns and he even brushes her off. Shaking his head and turning his back to her because somehow he should have seen something no one else did.

Throw in Reid’s comment about Call “victims are often drawn to the scene of their first trauma” and we’re painfully reminded of Hotch’s apartment. A place you’d think he’d want to escape but didn’t. The man was stabbed nine times in his own apartment and stayed in that same place. Almost sounds like that statement could be applied to Hotch too.

A dash of Hotch’s own comment about where Call would go to in his confusion and he says “to what he knows”, even the importance of how that orphanage is “where he became Darrin Call”. Where does Hotch go? What does Hotch know? The job.

So… we tally now three total Unsubs that Hotch has this direct relationship with. Three Unsubs with abusive fathers and mothers who couldn’t protect them. Hmm… coincidence?

Brothers Hotchner

Supervisor Special Agent Hotchner is a master of hiding, that is undeniable. It’s hard to see anything behind those furrowed brows and impersonal suits and that’s likely for a reason. However, anyone with a little sibling can tell you that no one on this Earth can and will annoy the ever-loving shit out of you like a sibling.

But that’s not really important. Sean and Hotch don’t talk about their parents. At all. Ever.

Hotch says that when Sean was in the first grade he got sent off to boarding school. “I was the screw-up making bad choices”. Interesting enough of a statement to make but you throw in the rough ages of Sean and Hotch at that time and it’s a little more than just “interesting”. You have Hotch at roughly 14-15 getting into trouble just like Morgan did at that same age (coincidence???).

(now you can certainly look at Hotch’s parentification vs. Sean’s immaturity doubled with substance abuse problems but we’d be stretching. “The Tribe” touches on the parentification but Sean just calls it “the big brother” thing and tells Hotch that he’s not Sean’s father and it’s fine it’s whatever. Hotch is a bit pushy. That’s not new. Substance abuse can just be a problem, it doesn’t have to be bc they were abused but again… a little coincidental)

So... was Aaron Hotchner abused as a child? I certainly think so

[absynthe--minded]

Beren, the Nauglamír, and Editorial Oversight

this is gonna be a long one, guys.

so one of the things that makes Christopher Tolkien’s contributions to the greater legacy of the Tolkien Legendarium so complex is that he, as the posthumous editor of his father’s works, essentially was able to declare what is or isn’t “canon” in a way that no amount of scholarship (fannish or professional) will be able to truly successfully challenge. it’s his vision of Arda that was published as the Silmarillion, and his interpretations of the Professor’s works that have come to act as the standard and the baseline. after all, the Silm’s been traditionally published and translated into many languages; it’s far more accessible than out-of-print/print-on-demand copies of the History, and reading it doesn’t require you to slog through pages and pages of commentary or to have a good solid understanding of what the story is so you can follow along with lists of bullet points outlining events timeline-style.

of course, Chris also made mistakes, and those mistakes became enshrined in canon just as surely as anything else. I and many others have discussed the Gil-galad problem (namely, that Gil-galad’s parentage is oblique and strange at best and downright contradictory at worst, and Christopher’s choice to make him Fingon’s son was an admitted error) but it’s not the only case of a decision later proving to be the wrong one.

with that background, let’s talk about Beren.

Beren and Lúthien are in an unusual position in the Legendarium as a whole. Not only are they the sole author-insert characters, they’re also uniquely positioned as moral compasses - every other person in the Silm is morally ambiguous to some degree, or does bad or questionable things; not so with these two. If Beren or Lúthien does something, it’s explicitly the right thing to do, and this is confirmed by the narrative. If someone else opposes them, that is the wrong course of action. They’re not merely protagonists who make a lot of good choices, they’re good people, and the things they do are right because of their moral fiber and nobility. Of the active agents who are developed to any great degree, they’re the least complex and the most clear-cut, and the narrative itself treats them differently from other characters, validating them and framing them as the sort of spotless heroes that are in short supply in this Age.

This characterization runs headlong into the actions Beren takes in early drafts of the story and in the published Silm, where after dwarves kill Thingol and sack Menegroth, Beren (with the help of some allies, usually either Green-elves or Ents) ambushes them and duels the Lord of Nogrod for possession of the Nauglamír, a necklace originally owned by Finrod in Nargothrond that Húrin brought to Doriath after his release from Angband. Thingol commissioned dwarven artisans to alter the piece and create a setting in it for the Silmaril that Beren and Lúthien had won for him from Morgoth, and there was a dispute about payment that escalated to violence and ended in his death at dwarvish hands. The battle, later called the Battle of the Thousand Caves, was more or less a victory for dwarvish forces, as they escaped both with the Nauglamír and several other treasures from Menegroth and they defeated Sindarin forces that set out to stop them.

In most versions of the story, Melian sends Mablung to Ossiriand to warn Beren and Lúthien of what’s happened, and essentially asks them to do something to stop the retreating dwarvish forces from reaching Nogrod, where they came from. Beren does this, killing the Lord of Nogrod himself and taking the Nauglamír and the Silmaril home to Lúthien, who then gives it to Dior, who takes it back to Doriath when he takes the throne there. This is the version of the tale that’s in the published Silmarillion, and the one that’s consistent throughout the earlier drafts that Tolkien himself wrote.

But it’s not the only version that exists.

In The War of the Jewels, which compiles versions of the story written late in Tolkien’s life, we find The Tale of Years. This is not a cohesive narrative, instead functioning (like many of the writings that make up the bulk of the History of Middle-Earth) rather like a series of bullet points mentioning and summarizing key events. It progresses chronologically, giving a sense of passing time and organization to the First Age, and it has this to say about the Nauglamír and the battle at Sarn Athrad:

“The Dwarves of Belegost and Nogrod invade Doriath. King Elu Thingol is slain and his realm ended. Melian escapes and carries away the Nauglamír and the Silmaril, and brings them to Beren and Lúthien. She then forsook Middle-earth and returned to Valinor.

Curufin and Celegorm, hearing of the sack of Menegroth, ambushed the Dwarves at the Fords of Ascar as they sought to carry off the Dragon-gold to the mountains. The Dwarves were defeated with great loss, but they cast the gold into the river, which was therefore after named Rathlóriel. Great was the anger of the sons of Fëanor to discover that the Silmaril was not with the Dwarves; but they dared not to assail Lúthien. Dior goes to Doriath and endeavours to recover the realm of Thingol.”

(This quote is taken from the latest and typed version of the Tale of Years, an earlier handwritten version exists that is shorter but includes the same relevant details.)

Christopher Tolkien elected not to use this version of events, instead choosing to maintain the earlier tale where Beren had an active role; he was never truly satisfied with this, or with the Ruin of Doriath as a whole. In the commentary to the Tale of Years he wrote that “It seemed at that time that there were elements inherent in the story of the Ruin of Doriath as it stood that were radically incompatible with ‘The Silmarillion’ as projected, and that there was here an inescapable choice: either to abandon that conception, or else to alter the story. I think now that this was a mistaken view, and that the undoubted difficulties could have been, and should have been, surmounted without so far overstepping the bounds of the editorial function.” We have, for a second time, an admission of error, though unlike the Gil-galad question there is not a specific choice singled out as a flaw.

Why am I talking about this? Well, simply, I think that the version of the story where Celegorm and Curufin attack the Dwarvish host is the one that makes the most sense, and I’m here to make my case for its adoption as fanon. I’m not trying to take a purely scholarly view - I can’t prove that Tolkien’s true vision was for this version of the text, and of course it’s only in the one draft - but as a fandom we’ve reached the consensus before that specific versions of the story are preferred, even when they only appear in a single draft (Amrod’s death at Losgar stands out as the best example).

So here’s my argument. 

1. Beren is not a violent man, and having him act as a murderer is out of character.

This one is pretty simple - Beren is an outlaw fighting against Sauron, a defender of his family’s land, a nobleman in his own right, and a vegetarian who is keenly aware of what it is to be hunted and pursued. The man we’re introduced to in the other versions of the story is not someone who would answer violence with violence unless there was no other choice, and in fact he becomes less violent as the story goes on. Putting him in a position where he’s acting militarily against the Dwarves introduces elements to his character that simply don’t exist before this story. It’s inconsistent, and it also ends his life on a strange, sour note - he’s not an uncomplicated hero anymore, he’s also got blood on his hands.

2. Beren is one of the moral compasses of the Silmarillion, and having him be the one to spearhead the ambush of the Dwarves frames that act of violence in a very troubling light.

Like I said above, Beren and Lúthien are good people who do good things, and those things are good because of who’s doing them. If Beren kills the Dwarves and the Lord of Nogrod, that act becomes justifiable, and perhaps even the right thing to do, simply due to the fact that one of the two true heroes of the First Age is doing it. The narrative never frames this as a downfall or a moral event horizon for Beren, either - he made the correct decision and the consequences that come afterward aren’t things that can be blamed on him. But wholesale slaughter, even slaughter of people who do bad things, is not something Tolkien ever condones or paints in a truly positive light, so it makes more sense for it to come at the hands of people who aren’t solely positive forces. It’s thematically in line with what Tolkien does through the rest of the text, and it feels more like Arda, at least to me. I think an argument could be made that Tolkien realized that making Celegorm and Curufin the responsible party would achieve this end, and that’s why this version exists in the first place, but there’s no proof of it.

3. The Laiquendi are nonviolent, and it makes no sense for them to be involved in this fight. The Ents being involved at all is somewhat nonsensical based on what we know of them in The Lord of the Rings.

Another simple one - we don’t know much about the Laiquendi, but we know they’re not really keen on warfare or on any undue violence, so having them be Beren’s backup is a weird divergence from their presentation in the rest of the Legendarium. And the Ents are pretty universally depicted as uninvested in the wars of the incarnates, only taking action against Saruman when it becomes apparent they have no other choice - why should they care about Thingol’s death, or care enough to murder dwarves?

4. Melian’s actions make far more sense in a version of the story where she doesn’t merely abandon Doriath once she realizes Thingol is dead.

If Menegroth is already sacked, and she cannot hold the realm together on her own as its Queen without really fucking shit up with reality-warping shadow magic, her choice to abandon it after delivering the Silmaril safely to her daughter and warning her that Dior will be needed soon is far less irresponsible.

5. Celegorm and Curufin ambushing the dwarves makes more sense than any other alternative.

Of course Celegorm and Curufin were actively watching Doriath for any sign of weakness. Of course they noticed the dwarves leaving with stolen treasures, and heard rumors that Thingol was dead and his killers had the Silmaril. Given the choice of following Melian (if they even were aware of Melian’s departure) and following dwarves, of course they picked the dwarves. Their ambush and attack and slaughter is consistent with their past behavior, as is their refusal to attack Lúthien because they were scared as fuck of her.

What’s more, this also explains the Fëanorians’ refusal to attack Doriath immediately after the dwarves do - they were unsure of whether or not Lúthien was in Menegroth and ruling as its queen or acting in some capacity as Dior’s defender. Celegorm in particular isn’t the type to hesitate - he’s impulsive, and rash, and rushes into bad decisions without considering their consequences, it’s even in his name. But they waited for years, giving Dior time to marry and have children of his own, and then even sent letters rather than attack directly - and yes, some of this might have been Maedhros’s influence, or an attempt by all of them to stave off the Oath, but it’s also plausible that they were trying to figure out whether or not they’d have to take on the same woman who made fools of them before.

I, at least, think this version of the story makes the most sense, and I’ll be adopting it into my personal canon. I obviously think it’s worth advocating for on a larger scale, and I hope I’ve made a good argument for its widespread adoption.

[izzymcfeegles]

Yet another post about Sebastian Stan:

I'm seriously tired of making these posts, but over the past few days, there has been a lot of controversy surrounding Sebastian's most recent IG post, and as a result,more things are resurfacing and its become impossible for me to ignore. I'm going to try my best to give a fair assessment, but if I'm being honest, this all appears to be a pretty troublesome pattern of behavior. Before I get into any of that, I think it's important to mention where I stand on cancel culture. As someone who is a longtime fan of wrestling and classic rock, I'm no stranger to seeing some of my favorite artists act in ways that would be considered unacceptable by today's standards. I do think that stan Twitter has a tendency to be a bit harsh when it comes to judging things that people have done in the past. That being said:

Context is important. The reality is that there were many things that were considered to be socially acceptable at one point in time, that we've since learned can be harmful, particularly to those who are marginalized on the basis of race, gender, sexual orientation, gender identity, etc. Something that was considered to be acceptable 2005, we later find can be toxic and harmful. Do I think it's productive to cancel for someone for something they did decades ago that was considered to be acceptable at the time? Not necessarily. However, if this person continues to exhibit the same behaviors to this day, then yes, they should be rightfully taken to task.

In Sebastian's case, he has a documented history of saying and doing things that are ignorant and tone-deaf. In the early 2010's he made an comment about playing Bucky as a "transvestite," a word that is considered to be dated and offensive to Trans people. If I'm being honest, if I saw the interview the date it aired, I probably wouldn't have blinked twice as I was not as educated on Trans issues at that time. I now know that the comment was unacceptable and hope Sebastian does too.

Regarding the Jeff!Seb pedo memes, I'd be lying if I said my edgy 2009 self wouldn't have found them funny at one point, however in 2017, my adult self was not amused. And coming from someone who was playing an abuser at the time, liking those memes was a bad look. Same goes for the Kneegate meme, especially when you consider the amount of hatred black NFL players were receiving from people including the President of the United States for kneeling in protest during the national anthem. It was tasteless, tone-deaf, and he should have known better. The fact that his "apology" over the incident was surrounded by quotes, and as some fans speculated, copied and pasted did not help matters. Mind you, many fans were willing to give him the benefit of the doubt and forgive him, and for a while things seemed okay.

Fast forward to 2020. After the man made it a point to shame Miami spring breakers for vacationing during the pandemic, he is seen months later vacationing in Ibiza and later Tulum. The fact that he used his money and Romanian passport to go on vacation while many of us were either stuck at home or worse, putting our lives at risk to put food on the table, understandably did not sit well with many people, especially when taking his previous comments about pandemic vacationers into account. The fact that his traveling partner is a socialite who has a history of doing cultural appropriation, including doing brown face and using the word "savage" in reference to her friend doing a native war cry made it sting even more. I'm not going to go into depth about her because she doesn't deserve the attention and this is about holding Sebastian accountable, but the fact that he is still with her and they appear to be inseparable, it's clear that her history of CA is a non-issue for him. Make what you will of that.

Moving to recent actions. The current project Sebastian is working on is controversial in its own right. As someone who has been a Mötley Crüe fan for almost 20 years, I am familiar with the history of that relationship and how toxic is was and will never defend Tommy and the abuse Pamela suffered at his hand. While my issue is mostly with the producers, it doesn't change the fact Sebastian and Lily are still willfully participating in a series that Pamela herself does not wish to be made.

Sebastian's most recent post seems to be catalyst for the most recent wave of Twitter outrage. I am well aware that Tommy is/was a practicing Buddhist and that things like Buddha statues were part of his home decor. That's not the issue. The issue lies in the face Sebastian chose to make in the photo where he appears to be prying to the statue, along with the caption "find your zen fuckerz." Once again, I am aware of Tommy's speech patterns and get that it was "in character," but to use the combination of that photo and that caption as a non-Buddhist, it's understandable why some Buddhist fans were offended and saw it as disrespectful. And as a non-Buddist, I don't think it's right to tell these people what they should and should not be offended by.

So for those of you who hate paragraphs, TL/DR:

Sebastian has a documented history of ignorant behavior and posts and as of now does not seem to be interested in addressing these things and learning about why the aforementioned behaviors are problematic and why some fans are hurt. This is not okay and we should not be defending him.

I understand that for many of you, he has been a source of joy. Bucky is still my comfort character and I will always be grateful to Seb for portraying the him with the nuance and care he deserves. I'm not asking anyone to stop staning Bucky or to take down your Seb x Reader fanfics. Life is short and you're entitled to the things that make you happy. Just understand that his actions have hurt a lot of people and why fans are upset and lashing out. While I do not condone any threats or doxxing aimed at his direction, the same goes to people who criticize him. I've seen people go to some vile lengths to defend him, from going after Pamela, a victim of abuse, to telling Buddhists how they should feel about their own religion, to anons telling the blogs who call him out to go kill themselves. None of this is ok. At the end of the day, Sebastian is a 38-year-old white man who has a great deal of money and influence and has more social capital than the people calling him out. He will be fine regardless of what happens and does not need people to protect him. The same cannot be said about the people he hurt through his actions.