#anon you genius

[allimili]

i normally dont send asks because im shy but your elysia! yn posts gave me brain worms...... imagine... shadow milk and elysia yn doomed lovers... imagine the angst...

Just a memory.

[turtletoads]

consider. transfem gohan?

considering............

[girltiger5000]

i saw that you posted jimanya with a say anything song! have you heard the song property by the same band? it fits them a lot in my opinion

anon after you sent this ask I read the lyrics and then I listened to it on repeat for days Thank you…

anyways anon you are so right I absolutely see it. it’s like if Jimmy was a little bit more obsessed about having control over her and cared about her (in his regular messed up ways) a little more

[fritzes]

both maria and jess beat iga to get their first slam sf

OH

[silvermoon424]

I think it's so funny how people think Naoko mistakenly switched Sailor Pluto and Sailor Saturns' attributes (she didn't), but completely overlook Sailor Mercury and Sailor Pallas. Mercury is a trickster god, but Sailor Mercury is the Soldier of Wisdom. Pallas Athena is the goddess of wisdom, but Sailor Pallas is one for cunning and trickery. And no one noticed this?!

Literally mfw I read this message

[tyrannosaurus-maxy]

That hot ass thick bearded dude grabbing Max by the wrist and yanking him onto the boat?!?!?!?! Holy fuck, that was WAYYYYYYY hotter than it should be.

I will not be taking questions on the thoughts I’m having at this time!!! 🤯🥵💦

Pirate AU when 😌

[devotion-disorder]

OSHA violation, put a tennis ball at the top of the horn

The Beast Has Been Contained

[chocostrwberry]

I like to imagine that after Alya loses her miraculous, she goes full investigation and detective, doing all she can to figure out what Hawmoth, Mayura, and Volpnia (and eventually Madame Morphosis and Argos) are planning and where they could be operating from (since she can't really figure out their identities),

YOU GOT MY BRAIN THINKING!!

What if since alya loses the fox miraculous, she feels like she failed LB and her team. But she won’t just crawl into a hole and feel sorry for herself. She’s still going to do everything she can to help LB, even if she doesn’t have a miraculous anymore. Alya does this through increasing awareness about Hawkmoth’s influence over Paris!!

Maybe she transforms her already popular Ladyblog into an Anti-Hawkmoth platform. She links mental health resources, interviews conducted by her with victims of Hawkmoth, ways to identify an akuma butterfly, etc.!

This would really help LB because if there are less akumas being created, she can have time to recover from unification. And it would be harder for Madame Morphosis in Season 3 to find people to akumatize, but as an unexpected drawback, the ones she does create are extremely powerful because the victims were too emotional to resist.

I didn’t really think of her role after losing the fox miraculous and this is kinda perfect bc I love her so much!!

[dipperscavern]

reading the father cregan most has made me feel things ?? my womb is empty ?? and waiting for cregan ??

ALSO KISSES i will always read your tags. they are the favorite parts of my day, in addition to when you post. notifications stay ON.

climbing up the walls with more thoughts of father cregan 🤠 (gods be fucking good, this does sound like a convent. hi sisters!) 🛐

i digress. as we have well established, cregan is a lovely father. he's patient. he's a leader. and he's got that stark loyalty and determination to protect what he loves. which is you and your little pups. (ur so right. he only refers to them as pups.)

i imagine that when your water breaks, you are squeezing this man's hand to the point of bone breakage. pleading with him not to leave. so when the maesters come in and settle you, they look at cregan, expecting him to leave the room - per tradition. one of them, maybe the youngest, starts speaking. "lord stark-" and cregan shuts that shit DOWN ☝️ "your lady stark does not wish it." and everyone knows to shut up and listen when it comes to lord and lady stark.

he is absolutely the type of lad to pick your kids pups up as they climb all over him. once in a post, you described his back as burly enough to sled on and your kids are determined to test that. HELP CAN we actually picture cregan's velocity sliding down a hill like 😐 while his kids are giggling, sliding on his back. hi! hello!

he tells your kids stories of the north in that rugged god-sent accent as he tucks them in for bed. will probably sneak out with them in the night to go get lemoncakes from the kitchen. he gives them cute little fur cloaks to wear, with the house stark embroidery. THIS IS SO CUTE I AM GOING TO SOB

holds them during his meetings. could literally be planning to go to battle or smth, and one of his kids comes in. he just puts them on his lap before continuing with battle strategy. he was just meant to be a dad. he's so giddy about it. so in love with you, and grateful that you gave him this. you gave him chubby little pups running around the castle, hands up in the air reaching for you both. he just wants more :((( crawling at your feet, in your arms, and more in your belly.

i fear i'm going to crash out if i continue. (will definitely be continuing with more asks later. ✊️)

-🔄❄️

REVERSE ELSA ANON HERE TO GRACE US ALL AGAIN !!! yes pls continue later arF ARF ARR ARF

u read my tags….. stop ily. notifications on too i am truly honored. ANYWAYS… SISTERS SISTERS GATHER ROUND. GATHER ROUND FOR FATHER CREGAN

you are so right btw. because when your water breaks, that’s when it all becomes real to you. yes, you want this babe out, but birth is a scary, painful thing. hearing the stories of men choosing to save the babe instead of the mother (i glance to viserys), or of men being done with their wives after they do their duty has only heightened your worry in having to go through it. cregan would never do that to you, you know this, but the thought is a scary one, and it lingers nonetheless. it doesn’t help that the rational side of your brain isn’t in charge right now. you’re afraid.

so when cregan goes to leave and fetch the maesters, you, not usually one to make demands — find yourself almost yelling one.

you both stand rooted to your spots, looking at the fluid on the floor. he was trying to help you into bed, but apparently your pup had other plans. you’re momentarily paused, cregans arm around your waist, hand enclosed in yours while facing the bed. shock hangs in the air as both you realize what this implies. he moves to remove himself from you.

“I will fetch the—“

“No!”

your tone of voice stops cregan in his tracks. has his brows pinching not in their usual hardness, but concern. he had hardly begun to turn away before you reached for him. he tilts his head to look at you, your own dropped down, gaze fixed on the floor. you look at him, a mix of so many emotions on your face cregan could not begin to name them all. you have a hand over your stomach, the other firmly clasped over his arm.

“Do not go. Please, Cregan. I’m afraid.” he’s never heard you like this before. fearful. you mistake his worry for refusal.

“Please— I ask this of you—“

“You need only ask once.” he reassures.

you sigh, relief flooding your veins at cregan heeding your request. it’s tradition for the husband to remain outside of the birth room, but you’re not sure you can do it without him. cregan only pulls you closer, shouting the name of your sworn sword that has been made to accompany you everywhere since the late terms of your pregnancy. the knights response is instant, opening the door with a hand on the hilt of his sword.

“My Lord.”

“Fetch the maesters, Ser. The babe is coming.”

the knight only hesitates with shock, before bowing with the ghost of a smile on his face and running to do as commanded. the entire castle has been waiting on your pups arrival, you both included.

eventually, the maesters arrive — and in tow with them, an army of midwives and your usual ladies in waiting. cregan stands at the foot of the bed, far enough to be out of the way, but close enough to be at your beck and call. they’re attentive, maesters setting up their various herbs & medicines as your ladies in waiting prepare the room itself, your midwives attuned to your every move.

one of the youngest maesters, new in his craft, looks at cregans unwavering form with hesitation. he swallows, and begins to speak before one of the elder maesters can stop him.

“My Lord, it is tradition—“

“Your Lady Stark does not wish it,” he says, looking at the young maester. “So it shall not be.”

the man only nods, returning to his work with his head low. the other people in the room, who have served under cregan for years, know when lord & lady stark come out to quiet themselves & get to work.

the labor is long, and the birth difficult, but cregan is there every step of the way. eventually, hours upon hours later, your pup enters the world — kicking and screaming.

“A boy, Lord Stark!”

cregans heart skips a beat. a boy. an heir.

before you know it you have three. two boys, and one girl. cregan melts into the father role like he was made for it, and every time you get the gift of watching him interact with your kids, you get more and more convinced it is so.

watching them hang off his back, giggles falling from their lips, stretched in a wide smile as his much larger arms come to support under their legs. the view of it from behind makes you laugh, each & every time. cregans back almost swallows your kids whole, their tiny frames dwarfed in comparison. even so, he handles them with a gentleness most wouldn’t expect from the wolf of the north. alike to how you might handle a butterfly landing on your fingertip, or the delicacy used to handle newborn foals.

cregan verses them in the culture of the north, along with its stories. tales of vampire direwolves, the old gods & weirwood trees, and the stories cregan himself was told as a child. he’s careful to not scare them too much, but sometimes, other people can get carried away. a guard or one of the men on his council letting a frightening tale about the others slip, resulting in them asking to sleep with you and cregan for the night. of course, you oblige every time, generous in your reassurances that the others are no match for Ice — or for their father.

your daughter has him wrapped around her finger. pleas of staying up just a little longer, or riding just down that trail are almost always obliged. he can’t help it, when she looks up at him with those big pleading eyes of hers — the ones that are akin to yours. asking him sweetly if they could please check for any leftover lemon cakes. it’s late, she should be asleep, but cregan can’t help himself. opening the door in a way so it won’t creak, hushing her giggles and buying the cooks silence as they get a late night snack.

and yeah, when one of his pups stumble into the council meeting, he doesn’t turn them away. he picks them up to slot them on his lap, and the stern look on his face is all they need to see to know to be quiet if they want to stay. he could be planning anything — from a hunt, to going to the winter town himself to take care of a group of men intent on causing havoc. it could lead to bloodshed, but your kids don’t seem to hear that part, just content being with their father.

cregan wouldn’t trade this life for anything. he loves his pups, and he’s so in love with you. passing by each other during the day, and cregan always stops you, pulling you to him to slot his lips against yours — no matter how busy he is. he can’t help it, you’re just so lovely, and you’ve given him so much. he thinks of you every time he looks at your pups, and he feels his heart skip a beat in his chest. seeing your pups throw snowballs at each other, and he can’t resist, pulling you close & bending to connect your lips with his. you melt into him every time.

[wetpussyju1ce]

toxic!ex boyfriend/toxic!baby daddy!jax pls!!!

exbf!/bd!jax who absolutely loses his shit when he realizes he's lost you for good after you move the last of you and your son's boxes in the moving truck. literally shaking, crying, sliding down the wall

remember that scene after abel was kidnapped and he's just in the nursery chain smoking? yeah, that's him but with cigarettes and alcohol that he swiped from the clubhouse's bar

exbf!/bd!jax who lost out on the best pussy of his life because he played with your heart one too many times

was the breakup his fault (again)? yes, but in his defense you weren't supposed to be back home from your business trip for a few more days. you decided to surprise him for his birthday and found him in bed with ima.

you absolutely beat the brakes off her and it took juice and chibs three tries to you off her after luring them to false security that you were good before you attacked her again and opie and clay were manning the door so you wouldn't get in.

exbf!/bd!jax who damn near has to be sedated when your son tells him during dinner that mommy is having a playdate with one of his friends' dads.

it feels like a shock to the heart. you weren't supposed to move on. you were supposed to be mad at him for a week, maybe two, then you'll cave, tell him you miss him. he gets gemma and clay to watch your son so the two of you could "mend your relationship" aka, so he could fuck your brains out, promising that he'll be better, that the two of you will get finally get married.

ex!bf/bd!jax who hates how happy you are without him, that you're not with this guy just to make him jealous.

there's a genuine connection and the guy treats his son with respect, treats you like a queen.

he knows he can't get in between this relationship

ex!bf/bd!jax who realizes that he has to let you go, the further and further he's sucked into the club

idk, just something i thought up

+18 mdni

okay anon. I'm usually NOT into toxic aus like this but this made me giggle. more like cackle like a merry witch! because there's something abt a man crying vomiting sliding off the walls ripping his hair out when he realises he's fucked up BIG TIME that is very satisfying to me. that he fumbled his biggest blessing and gift in life. OH I LOVE IT. HE DOES NOT DESERVE HER. NEVER HAS AND NEVER WILL. HAHAHAHAAAA

oh yeah. def reader would move on. cry a little. drink a little maybe. spend long nights w her toys and then pass out in bed over the sheets only wearing a t-shirt. winnie the pooh style.

but then she picks herself back up again. settles in w her baby if she had one w jax. because OBVS she's taking the baby with her. what the hell. gets a new job. donates half of her wardrobe just because. treats herself once in a while. works out at home. gets a cat or two. keeps a garden w her baby. while jax has red rimmed eyes hunched over a bar counter depressed LOOOLLLL

oh and then he'll try sooo hard to get her back. grovel. beg on HIS KNEES if he needs to. sends flowers. sends groceries. whatever the hell she needs. pays for child support. pays for the baby's clothes or for school supplies if they go to school. he would randomly show up to the house. kick the dirt of her lawn w his shoes like an angsty teenager while reader ignores him inside the house, watching TV in her undies, a big bowl of popcorn resting on her lap, wet hair wrapped in a towel.

and when they cross paths outside in public (more like he stalked her like a maniac) he tries to get her to listen to him. uses every trick to get her to WAIT. lowers his voice. does that thing where he tilts his head to the side. charming. handsome. teasing. he knows she used to like that shit when he did before. he smiles and looks at her w his baby blues. begging for time. Just 10min. please please please please

but she doesn't care anymore. is over it. she only cares abt what her future holds. abt living in the now. so she walks off and his shoulders sag and he sadly looks at her magnificent ass as she leaves him to go shopping or something.

that night he rages and smashes half of his room, smokes a fag or two, gets in bed, all grimmy and dirty, sadly jerks himself off, comes all over himself with her behind his eyelids and cries a little then passes out in bed (shoes still on and everything).

[daylighted]

MANAGER BEN HERE AND I KNEW U WOULD SEE MY VISION !!!!! hate fucking in the payback conference room, desperate secret make out sessions in the elevator, intimate touches during vought banquets and parties AAAAAHAHHHHHH i can always count on u queen!!! and i live for a (healthy) age gap story !! in my head shes mid-twenties and sb is around 30-40's like u said, bc honestly its jensens prime

love u

i fear i think all of jensens life is his prime so of course i have to agree with u. anyways let me feed the ppl a lil. a tease if u will

also can we pls send all the love to manager!ben anon bc this is literally not my idea whatsoever it is all urs pooks u are the genius behind all this every time u come up in here i SCREEAMMM

it started so innocently, when you think back on it now. this man you couldn't stand; the girl he was instantly pulled in by and couldn't leave alone. maybe you should have known that it was doomed from the start from that alone, but perhaps you were, while denying it, hoping that it wasn't.

soldier boy's kissing you in between the first and the ninety ninth floor. your parent's office, where you were supposed to be heading, is on the twenty-fourth. but of course, ben was conveniently waiting for the elevator at the same time as you. of course, he stands by the buttons, acting as if it's an act of chivalry within itself to hit your button for you.

"what floor are you, sweetheart?" he'd asked with that little quirk in the corner of his mouth. and you'd said twenty-fourth, and he'd promptly ignored it, pressing the ninety-nine at the very top of the list.

an argument ensues. it always does. but he plays you like a harp, and touches you just as gently, as if those same hands weren't stained with invisible blood that you only knew about from the stories your parent told you about. none of them are heroes, they'd said, it's best to not fall for that illusion no matter how desperately they try to paint it.

ben was desperation at its very core. your leg was hiked around his waist, and it felt heroic; the way his tongue swiped against yours. it felt heroic as he stole your breath from the cage that was your lungs. and it definitely felt like you were being saved when his bloodstained, killing fingers pushed the fabric of your panties away and he dipped them inside of you like you could singlehandedly wash them clean.

"they hate you," you pant on his mouth, not as an accusation but a simple statement. you do this sometimes, when you're overwhelmed, and he's making you feel too good for a man that you despise, that you punched in the face on your first meeting, and tried to the next three times you saw him, too. little reminders for yourself that this man did not equate to his actions. it was too much, though, to think about if that logic applied to the deaths on his conscience. "i hate you," you correct, and somehow it becomes a loop, like you could convince yourself if you repeated it enough.

his fingers are buried deep, the tips of them pounding relentlessly against your cervix, stretching out your spongey wet walls while they desperately clench around them. his mouth is a bruising force on yours, teeth having already nipped your bottom lip, and even his soothing kisses to follow were rough and intense.

his nose presses against yours, and for a second he might be ben, but then his mouth opens, and you're reminded that he doesn't think you're special; at least, you don't think so. you don't know that he doesn't do this with anyone else - pin them to the elevator wall in the midst of an argument, trying to stoke the flames that so far only you have been able to rise within him.

"hate me quietly," soldier boy chides into your mouth, and you must be utterly screwed, because you listen.

[inkyrainstorms]

What if after the rescue, both Stan and Ford are so used to talking to eachother without the other responding that whenever someone responds they always meet it with surprise.

Stan: *has forgotten learning how to talk to people properly and just essentially monologues*

Ford: I see, what type of snails did you find?

Stan: *shocked Pikachu face*

And same thing in reverse too.

Both boys have had social isolation so I think their conversation skills have infinitely took a dip.

Wait, anon, you’re right. The recovery arc of this au is gonna be such a fascinating one to explore, given that the only times they actually talked face to face was in the beginning and will be near the end, whenever Ford manages to rig up the system so he can send messages too. It’d be hard, of course, and rescuing Stan has a higher priority than talking to him. Ford is just glad he can hear Stan’s voice

the. ‘Oh my god that was really fucked up and we should talk about our issues face to face now that all is said and done’ arc will be the best thing ever

[targaryenluvs]

I absolutely love how you write!! Now I've got this under my skin: basically the President Coriolanus and maid dynamic. The servant has this behavior in which she avoids crossing paths with Coriolanus at all costs but he already has her in his sights.

coriolanus snow x fem!maid!reader

mr president

tw: mdni 18+ (m masturbation, jerked off, implied sex in, power abuse, humiliation kink, guilt trip, cheating, degradation, naive reader, implied short reader)

coriolanus had been watching you all day. you knew it. he knew it, and he didn’t care. you’d always been taught to put your head down, go unnoticed, to just work. but it seems president snow had other ideas to how you could be of service to him, preferably with your legs wide open.

but this week felt different. you were use to his stares, they always seemed to linger even once he was long gone. but lately they set your body on fire, consuming you. you could barely look at him when he asked you to fetch a glass of water, when he requested for another seat at the table to be set tonight, and so on.

he loved to embarrass you with the most ridiculous and tedious jobs. but at first they’d been mild in want, for you to feed him, for you to clean his shoes and tie them, pick any lint off of his coat. but as his desire for you increased so did the humiliating nature of them. to clean the floor in your uniform which he knew you’d ripped that morning on a sharp thorn, to pick up the utensils he’d dropped, when he’d requested fresh new sheets after he’d soiled them himself. watching intently as your hands bunched up the sheets, cradling them in your arms as your cute little face scrunched up in horror as his cum coated your hands.

he loved you.

and you had no idea as to why. you never drew attention to yourself and certainly not enough to warrant his. yet coriolanus was hellbent on having you.

when you were awoken by one of maids in the middle of the night you’d expected something different, maybe one of the girls needed help in cleaning. but when she told you of president snow asking for you specifically for help with something, you could only help but be scared. you didn’t want to go help him with whatever. you didn’t want to be within arms reach of him let alone his own quarters. his wife was away on a business trip that week, leaving him with free time to torment you.

but you went nonetheless, who were you to refuse your dear president?

the entire walk to his quarters had you reassuring yourself, he’ll want you to bring him something. ‘water perhaps, then he’ll let you go. he’ll let you go y/n.’ you approached his door, raising your hand before knocking but a voice stopped you in your tracks. was it a cry? a groan? you leaned into the door, ear pressed against the cold wood, listening for a hint of what was occurring.

‘fuck,’ he groaned out, ‘so good, fuck s’ so good.’ that must be some really good soup! you thought as you smiled, you’d made his soup today and he said he’d eat it later on that night. ‘fuck y/n.’ now you weren’t arrogant, it may have been your soup but you didn’t name it after yourself. you should correct him.

‘mr president?’ your sweet voice called out, your voice went straight to his throbbing cock. ‘c-come in.’ you smiled to yourself as you opened the door only to be with president snow on his bed, hand wrapped around the base of his cock, completely naked with a smirk on his face. definitely not eating soup, you thought. ‘close the door, now.’ you did exactly that, what would someone say if they found the president so indecent? you should protect his image.

‘sit down.’ you crept over to him before hoisting yourself up, your small frame dwarfed by the overly-large bed. meant for two. his wife! you instantly covered your eyes like a child who’d seen something they just weren’t meant to. ‘i’m so sorry president snow, i didn’t mean to look. i’ll leave.’ you rambled as you slowly wriggled away, but not before his hand landed on your thigh. ‘i didn’t call you in here for you to leave right after.’ his hand rubbed into your thigh, soft and gentle, everything he wasn’t. it drew a soft moan from your lips, snows smug expression was evident, only if you’d just open your eyes.

your hands slowly peeled away from your face as you gazed into his eyes, ‘i saw you looking before, you liked it didn’t you slut?” for some reason the word made you blush as you looked down at your lap, his hand was playing with the hem of your night dress. ‘no mr snow.’ you bashfully replied, his hand worked its way up underneath your dress, the other preoccupied with his dick.

‘no? am i not pretty?’ you eyes widened at the implication, president coriolanus snow, ugly? he was anything but, ‘no! i- i mean yes, yes you are pretty, very pretty mr president.’ he grinned at your words, ‘yeah? you wanna prove it to me? you’d do anything for your president right?’ you nodded along quickly, not before gasping as his hand now played with the waistband of your underwear.

‘i want you to suck me off.’

‘suck what?’ his eyes trailed downwards.

‘oh! oh.’

the sentence sent your head into a spin, were you really going to do this? but his sweet voice, so soft and hushed, his body illuminated by the gentle orange glow of his lamp, his hooded eyes, so sleepy. it all coaxed you in as he led your hand to where he needed.

another quiet groan escaped coriolanus’s lips as your thumb rubbed over the tip of his cock. he was already close but just your presence, along with your hand had him tipping over the edge. your slow tugs, unsure and trying, your timid voice, ‘am i helping you sir?’ sir, the clear line distinguished the two of you in place. ‘yes, yes you are y/n. call me by my name.’ and soon enough he reached his peek, sticky release all over your tiny hands.

he was sure the picture would be ingrained in his head, you’d lifted your hands as you simply stared at them, then looking up at coriolanus.

‘what do i do?’

‘swallow.’

[wannaeatramyeon]

The Crew Heads with Reader: Board Games

G/N. Silly. 4 small scenes. (Jake Kim, Eli Jang, Johan Seong, Samuel Seo)

Bro Code | Dinner | Shopping | Television | Gacha | Board Games | Suits

"What the fuck?" Samuel glares at Johan who returns it with equal hostility.

"It's a word." Johan spits, arms crossed and defiant.

"Use it in a sentence."

"I'm going to kilp you."

"Johan will kilp you," Jake chimes in.

"Samuel will be kilped by Johan," Eli adds.

"Almost," you say, "But Johan I don't think that's a word-"

"3 to 2, overruled!" Jake grins, totting up the points from the Scrabble board. "Ok so that's triple word score too for God Dog. Fuck... he's in the lead."

.

.

"I just said you can't play a +2 on top of a +2 card!" Jake moans, looking at the stack of cards in the middle.

"Says who?" Johan asks, because that rule is stupid

"It sounds like bullshit but-," Eli scrolls on his phone, looking for a source. "Uno officially. The cards can't stack."

You lean over his shoulder, read the rule with your own eyes but disregard it anyway. "The fuck do they know."

"5 to 0, draw your cards asshole." Samuel leans back, smug when Jake add another 6 cards to his hand.

.

.

"You're cheating!" You screech as Jake freezes like a deer caught in headlights.

"No I didn't!" He holds up both hands in surrender. He absolutely did not cheat.

"You grabbed an extra 100 won, I saw you!"

"I didn't!" Jake protests his innocence.

"I saw him too," Eli says as Johan and Samuel both nod vigorously.

"What, owning most of the properties on the board isn't enough for you?" You say, jabbing a finger in Jake's chest. "And now you're cheating?!"

"But I didn't-"

"I don't want to play anymore!" You throw your cash in the air, standing up and stepping over the Monopoly board as the rest of the guys follow suit.

"But... I didn't." Jake mutters, looking at the mess of cash around him.

Ok. So he didn't cheat. In fact, you know for certain that everyone else did. It's just expected with a game like Monopoly. No-one becomes rich fairly with capitalism.

Poor Jake however, did play fair and square, ended up lucky with the community chest and chance cards which led to him owning the majority of the properties.

All of you, getting more pissed off by the minute but not wanting to admit defeat, slithered your way out of it by accusing Jake and throwing him to the wolves.

You promise to make it up to him, somehow. But you are not losing at Monopoly.

.

.

"Are you blind?" Johan growls when Samuel's hand comes down on the 9 that landed on top of the 6.

"Fuck off," he mutters, retreating and putting his own card down - an 8.

"I think Snap might not be for Samuel," Eli grins, placing a King face up, as Jake agrees that Math isn't Sammy's strong suit.

"Easy mistake," you shrug, rising to his defence. You have definitely done something similar many times. Not with these guys though.

You've never played Snap, that simple card game, with them. For good reason-

"Snap!" Jake shouts, hand slamming down after he places another King on top of Eli's.

The table legs creak, then with a sickening crash, collapses under the force of his power. The four crew heads and you are left sitting around a mess of splintered wood, spilled drinks and ruined cards.

"Oops."

Samuel rolls his eyes. "Well done, moron."

-And that's why you don't play Snap.

[malifiquemakes]

your points about Chad Kakashi are very true. As well as Virgin Obito. But I would like to propose the well loved trope of Chad Becomes A Moron Because Of Virgin. Obito not even trying to be sexy and yet, Kakashi getting turned on left and right.

Anon you are 1000% correct, thank you for The Visions:

Not now Naruto, sensei is busy speed running 20 years of repressed gay panic

[iamnmbr3]

Lupin would get cancelled for marrying a 25yo, Sirius would get dragged for being secretly a nepo-baby. Krum would get cancelled for dating a 14yo. The shopping list would be long for the reasons why Dumbledore would get cancelled, but the man would not stop putting out iconic tweets. Hagrid would get cancelled for animal trafficking. Snape would get cancelled for having the craziest attitude and wearing his black cloak buttoned to the TOP.

Bahahahahahahahaha

(this is regarding my post about what dumb things Harry Potter characters would get cancelled for on social media if they had it)

love it