#animating is fucking painful <3< /div>
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sait........
og video format below the cut before it got SCRONGLED by like seven different compressions
still scrongled by tumblr compression but brother, i am tired
#madness combat#madcom#rain world#actual art#rain world slugcat#technically.#rain world saint#saint rw#animating is fucking painful <3
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This is far from my best work, but it's 1:30am, and I needed to get this down before I slept or lost my mind. So here, take a snippet of Rook seeing Zara again for the first time in 3 years.
Trying, and failing, to keep his voice from shaking, [Rook] said “Hello, Captain.” Mouth still open in surprise, [Zara] replied “Well, hello yourself.” The reality of what she was seeing seemed to hit her as she rounded the desk. “Rook, is that really you?” He nodded. “It’s me.” Zara ran towards him, stopping just short of touching him, and said “What did she do to you?” Rook’s heart stuttered and he had to brush his fingers together to confirm Sigmar’s ring was still in place. Could she possibly see through its illusion? But then he remembered what Lanny had said. She knew where you were. His throat clenched and he choked out “Two years.” A wave of grief swept across Zara’s face as she said “I’m so, so sorry.” Rook shook his head vigorously. “It’s not your fault.” Zara ignored him. “It is my fault. I failed you. As your captain, it’s my responsibility to keep you safe, and I failed you.” Rook wanted to say something, to reassure her, but she pushed on. “She sent me letters, told me all the terrible things she was doing to you. I… I let you down.” Those words hit Rook with the force of a dozen cannonballs. Lanny had said that Zara knew Wolf had him, but knowing that Zara had been aware of what Wolf was doing to him… somehow that was more painful than any wound Wolf had ever inflicted. He barely managed to force his next words out around the lump in his throat. “Where were you?” And why didn’t you come? “She said she’d kill you if I came to get you. Or if I hired anyone to get you. You’re standing here because I stopped sailing.”
(honorary one-time tag for @space-writes bc I remember you enjoyed my other bits about Rook and Zara.)
#morrigan.text#my writing#dnd writing#oc: Rook#oc: Zara#btw when I say that what she said was more painful than any wound wolf inflicted I'm not just talking about her not saving him.#it also just hurts him to know that she was hurting too.#she left him with that woman for two years (to save his life yes. but she left him there all the same) and yet half of his thoughts are#''I'm sorry I hurt you.''#ROOK. MY BELOVED BABY BOY. PLEASE.#STOP APOLOGIZING.#also if anyone needs a cheering up after this please know that their conversation got interrupted by a giant snake showing up and zara#immediately asking Rook ''WHAT DID YOU DO???'' bc she knows her boy.#and he's like ''idk I just woke up like an hour ago'' and then he suddenly remembers that he swore like 3 times (town rules say no to that)#and he just goes ''SHIT'' and Zara fucking clamps her hand over his mouth and says ''take that back!''#and through her hand he says ''how the fuck am I supposed to take that back?'' and she just clamps his mouth harder.#oh. and the time he swore earlier was bc he stepped outside and got spit on by a bull and he was like ''is this normal??''#and someone said ''I've never seen that happen but these animals are part of [big snake almost-god]'s menagerie'' and hands Rook a paper#with all the town rules (there are many). And he goes ''what the fuck?'' and then he gets to the rule that reads ''no swearing'' and he goe#''SHIT!'' and then he realizes what he says and goes ''AAAHHHH.'' and I was cackling.#I was doing this on purpose btw. I knew that this would make the snake mad at me and I did it anyway bc I am a chaos gremlin.#however I did NOT know I would get Rook's only friend from before the party killed by doing this. RIP Jay. I loved you so much.#but yeah. my boy swears like a sailor bc he is one. and it did in fact get people killed. But it was funny to me.#ALSO when she met the party the first thing she said was ''thank you for saving my boy'' and I almost sobbed.#like yeah. he is her boy.#I'm going to explode just thinking about it.#okay if you read all these tags I love you forever and please feel free to yell at my idiot boy in the comments/tags/wherever.#maybe if enough of us join in he'll actually listen. (no he won't)#OH RIGHT. And the party is finally staring to realize how much of a capital L Liar this man is.#because they can literally see him catching himself about to say ''I'm fine'' every time they ask how he's doing
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Woe
youtube
Animation meme be upon ye
#oc#art#oc art#artists on tumblr#character art#animation#animation meme#this surprisingly took only 3 days to make :0#but holy fuck rendering this was a pain @~@#this was originally meant to be 30 seconds long but uhhhh I maayyy have went a little beyond that whoops#but still I like how it turned out :0#Youtube
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Finally finished Attack on Titan. My God. Just. Wow.
#I started it when it first came out then was very odd and on#I eventually watched like 3 seasons in and never watched the last season or the long finale eps#I started getting my brother more into anime over the last like 2 years or so#he discovered AOT and finished it a while ago now and has been pushing for me to finish it too for like probably over a year at least#I’ve always been reluctant cause it’s such a heavy show and I had to be in the mood#finally the stars aligned tonight and we watched the final finale ep.#I cried several times.#it was perfect#it was painful and perfect#my fucking heart#hard to believe I finally finished it after over a decade from when I started it#and now I have lots of convos about it with my brother to look forward to#we’ve already discussed plenty tonight. but it’s getting late and idk if my brain’s even fully processed it all#attack on titan#top tier in my books#I don’t think I could ever do justice to the show trying to explain what was so good about it#gotta appreciate the little things. need to take the time to look at where I am rather than just where I want to reach.#peace and freedom are always worth reaching for even if war and suffering are inevitable to life. cherish the lives around you.#those are my takeaways from the series. those are the messages I received. and what a tragic and beautiful journey it was.
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apparently being slightly too neutral with Gale about the crown of karsus in sorcerer's sundries and giving a slightly cautious piece of advice about Mystra before he goes to talk with her means that no matter how many times you successfully convince him not to use the crown for himself and ascend to godhood, at the very end when you convince him one last time with a DC 30 check, he's confused why you're telling him no when you've been pushing him to yes this whole time, and then he fucking breaks up with you to ascend anyway.
#bg3 spoilers#baldur's gate 3 spoilers#gale dekarios#im genuinely upset. it feels bugged - thats how much of 180 it was#the endings for eveyone feel poorly thought out but act 3 is such a pain in the ass. bugs everywhere.#like id get it if id spent the whole game feeding into gales arrogance and ambition but i fully wasnt??#how was i supposed to know it would all hinge on those two little dialogue choices?#my post#juno didnt get her happy ending and im sick as fuck about it 😭#ON TOP OF THAT i couldnt click on the dialogue option to have one last kiss right before we confronted the netherbrain!!#i'd click it and it'd exit out the conversation instead of showing the animation. im upSET#baldurs gate 3
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elias has been so extra much on my brain lately ;n; there's no specific reason why but I have been particularly yearning for him tenfold the past week or so.... my sun incarnate... I just want to wrap my body around his as tight as possible and never have to part from him again... he's got me completely captivated again waaaa.....
#x. talk#x. gush#<< maybe?#💛💥#I CANNOT HELP THEEES..... I SIMPLY LOVE MY HUSBAND ....#he got a cute recolor in the new pattle pass this season n his quotes with it are so sweet :) <3#he's so excited to train all the new recruits and isn't letting what deimos has done kill his moral... headbutting him like a giant kitty#I get literal crumbs of blitz content and i go fucking crazy again </333 ubi knows they got me good with him </333#need to kiss and bite and scratch him everywhere like a frantic rabid animal till im normal again !!!!!!#my back is still aching like hell from the concert n all i can think about is his warm hands carefully rubbing away the pain ;--;
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I know some people are talking about Sally and Barry attempting to emulate their mentors in certain situations, which backfires on them, but I don’t think Barry gave up on trying to be Fuches halfway through. Actually, it was a perfect impression. When he started screaming down the line at Hank, it’s because that’s what Fuches does. Whenever Barry tells him firmly that it’s over and he’s not going to help Fuches anymore, Fuches loses his shit; he yells at Barry that he’s pathetic, he won’t survive without him, when I find you motherfucker! Barry’s mistake was failing to recognise that Hank isn’t him. Hank respects himself, genuinely cares about other people and, most importantly, won’t degrade himself just to feel like somebody loves him. But Barry absolutely would and, with all his other damage, that’s why he’s furious that Hank somehow says no to him.
#barry will always walk on his knees for a hundred miles through the desert#but Hank will let the soft animal of his body love what it loves#and he would never ever do himself damage for somebody to use him. Barry always does#I’m not defending Barry btw I’m not that vein of Barry fan I hope he explodes in an explosion and fuches and maybe gene comes with <3#but Barry has never been loved unselfishly. never been loved by somebody not using him. so he understands love as sacrifice and pain ONLY#love is not gentle. love is a thousand tiny needles. love is their teeth embedded in your heart#so when Hank - who knows love can be both sacrifice and tenderness that you expose the worst of you and have it kissed and not cut open -#when he doesn’t adhere to this system Barry has in his head (when he basically says ‘no. this not how love or the world really works.’)#Barry fucking loses it. The way Fuches loses it. because to them love is pain and if they don’t hurt you they don’t love you#and if they hurt you (no matter how awfully) then you forgive them in the end. you get to be a little upset. but you always go back. always#but Hank won’t and he doesn’t need to! he is loved openly and honestly and any pain comes from having to grow and understand not from abuse#and Barry loathes him for it. he hates it. and he’s never going to get out and he’ll never be free. he is sick sick sick#and there’s not a cure in the world for it anymore#not when he let it fester and get worse and worse and worse. and now it’s over before it’s over.#ANYWAYYYYT#barry#barry hbo#monroe fuches#noho hank#barry berkman#edit: yeah turns out Hank will also kill it though. oops!
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Hey guys I saw a leaked script for frozen 3 and hands makes a return !!
Hans: literally just breathes Elsa: smirks and Murders him to death with ice powers, struts away sassily because she’s Idina Menzel Hands: will return in Frozen 4 and every short thereafter for this same joke
#Hey how the fuck did this copy into italics when I had the asterisks copied#since when does tumblr do that#Disney#frozen 3#frozen#disney frozen#I’m bored I guess because I know I’m opening to a bunch of hate#but nevertheless I am so goddamn tired of overdone jokes and#buttmonkey villains who are supposed to be threatening but are undermined in every appearance thereafter#‘it’s just a kids movie omg’ bro I know. Why don’t you want kids movies to be good#Anyway I’m annoyed by the Wish movie too but apparently that’s controversial to say#sorry but the animation in the trailer is PAINFUL literally it’s a headache trigger#Like I’m sorry I loved Spiderverse and puss in boots last wish#but I can’t even watch Nimona or the Spiderverse sequel rn#I Can’t even play tears of the kingdom. Had to quit because I got badly sick every time I played#Luckily this joke will be swallowed by tumblr because I used too many tags#but ugh I’m just tired of bad jokes#I’m tired of bad dialogue#I saw monsters Inc the other day and remembered what good funny dialogue was in a kids movie#natural interactions and believability and unique voices#voices as in tones and delivery#but also the voice actors yes#I know it’s because of the studios rushing this junk out for a quick buck#and the shit conditions the writers work under#but I’m just like… tired#If wish is any better than the ultra compressed YouTube trailers as they say#maybe I can watch it. And I will judge it in full then#otherwise rn it looks like another disenchanted or whatever they called the enchanted sequel
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jobs will say they're disability friendly until you actually need them to be friendly about your disabilities
jobs will say they're mental health friendly until you actually have to miss work for it
jobs will say they support you taking time off until you actually do it
capitalism is a sham and employers do not and will not ever care about you, and if you're chronically ill, sucks to suck
i have an average of 1.5 absences a month and i'm tardy an average of twice a month, and somehow that's still too much.
18 absences in a year if i go at the current rate. 18. out of the 208 days total that i work (4 on, 3 off, with a 3 hour commute each direction.) 18. days. of absences. and that's too many.
and god forbid i be more than 15 minutes late.
#it's because we're horrifically understaffed#animal rescue is understaffed and underpaid and burnt the fuck out#but where else am i gonna go#back to retail? my body can't take that anymore#a decade of 8 hours a day on my feet has quite literally crippled me#i called out today because i dared to have fun over my weekend and my hip pain flared so badly that i couldn't put weight on it#i should stay home and rest it tomorrow too#but i'm not#because my boss already texted me today to inform me that my absences are “alarmingly too frequent” and “becoming problematic”#i took fmla for a month and a half last year because i couldn't handle existing#i've been back for 3 months#my shelter laid off 15% of our staff within a month of me returning#critical teams were cut entirely#and my team#the adoptions team#has seven people total#that's not enough#that isn't NEARLY enough#not for an animal shelter of our size and animal volume#that's why me calling out is “problematic”#because HR won't greenlight us for more positions#because of a problem THE CEO caused by driving us into the ground financially#and if i leave i have to start all over somewhere else#i have to wait a year to be eligible for fmla at a new job#i lose my benefits#i don't even know if i could FIND a job#the market is awful and i will literally collapse if i have to work a standing job again#i made it six months at my last one#because i was so dizzy and in so much pain all the time#undiagnosed issues of course
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i have this oc that nomatter how hard i try i can get her personality right and it is so painful i kinda am gonna cry abt it
#manga#anime#oc#plz if anyone is open to helping me ill take it#i dont eanna ask reddit and stuff cuz people are really judgemental there and shes really personal and stuff shwhw#fan oc#original character#🥺😭#im in so much pain#i think maybe i just needa play the games shes related to the most more#i have started on one btu the other i dont even have#and then there are 3 FUCKING VERSIONS OF IT WHY ATLAS#AND THE NEWEST ONE IS ONLY ON THE PLAYSTATION RN 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 OOUGH#persona 5#persona 3#maybe im limiting her witj her relations or smth i cant tell
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Do you ever think you’re not meant for this world and would fit so much more easily into the depraved sex horror mutilation novels you’re so fond of
#I’ve been through so much fucked up shit and now I’m just supposed to go to work?#sometimes I feel like I’m on a different plane of reality that only people who have been exposed to horrific things can access#and that’s why it’s so hard to get along with people. like they don’t know what it’s like to suffer#there’s a degree of pain where you turn into an animal . and someone needs to have known that#it’s like we’re entirely different organism like Neanderthals and Homosapiens. same ecological niche but fundamentally not the same#that metaphor will break down if you squint too hard at it#this is very stream of consciousness#but genuinely a lot of my closest relationships throughout my life have been with cult survivors and people who’s parents are murderers#or have survived similar shit that I have. I dated a guy in high school who’s dad shot his grandma while he was asleep in the house#(for those who keep track he’s the one who left his literal nazi fiancé for me . he was a nice enough guy just in a complicated situation)#it’s like we can all speak the same language without sounding like gibberish#I love not phasing people it’s so humiliating when my life is the most horrific thing someone has ever heard of#anyway the novel I finished today was very comforting . to me <3 it felt like a world I’d like to sink into and live in#give it up for auto-amputation
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i am so miserable these days it's unreal. let's hear it for the misery folks everyone give it up for the misery 👏👏👏
#i do nothing but sleep and then overeat out of stress and pain and then become more stressed and pained and sleep more#nothing excites me nothing is worth waking up for nothing makes me passionate or happy#i wake up every day after awful nightmares and the first thing i notice is the agony in my hips and it does not improve#i cry 2-3 times a week when i used to never cry at all while on my bipolar meds#i have stories i fall in love with (like the silt verses) but they only fleetingly hold my attention compared to the past#every time i flap about headcanons it's a little more desperate a little more transparently trying to escape my body#having more and more days where i simply play phone games all day because i'm in so much pain that#even merely scrolling tumblr or trying to watch tv / youtube makes me feel pukey#i need to see a doctor really bad aha. except theyre just going to say#you're fat and out of shape. stop eating everything and take a walk#completely disregarding that my hips are both subluxing with every goddamn step i take#it's fucking horrible. it's fucking horrible in here and if i was an animal they'd put me down out of kindness#unfortunately. i am a human being.#negative#disordered eating /#food /#i GUESS.#autoimmune tag
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also good evening my legs fucking hurt
#i'm like a 4-legged baby animal learning how to walk my legs are WOBBLY#i've been huddled up in my room for days now bc i fucking hate it here everyone is horrible and it's school break so i have. nowhere to go.#like i just went out last week to settle some stuff in enrollment for next sy and had to stay there for 4 hours it was So Bad#but i went for a walk for a few minutes outside thinking it was gonna help with my mental state but that is False <3#not only does it not improve my brain i am now experiencing Pain that is Physical!! love it here /j#catdrain
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#fUCK 2/3 OF THE DVDS DO NOT PLAY ON MY XBOX IM GOING TO FUCKING SCREAM#its obviously been resealed too there were some smudges so its like idk if theres even anything on the discs now#and its midnight so i cant check if they work on our all regions dvd player downstairs#but even if they work on that one... thats a hard ask of me to sit downstairs and watch anime in front of everyone during the day#its supposed to be a us region but like at this point idk if its an xbox issue or a bootleg issue or a preowned issue#fuck man im gonna have to buy a bunch of pc accessories too then to watch in my room without headphones on#this sucks man i was so excited but the world is just conspiring against me being able to watch this fucking anime#i find more and more things to regret every day of my life#i can take issue with the seller but if i do then i have to return it and its like... more hassle but i only have 2 more days to do that#but guess whos got a LONG FUCKING DAY TOMORROW#delete later / /#vent#ShitPost.exe#srsly like im already mad regardless of whether it works or not downstairs i need to just give up being mad bc the problem is already here#im going to fuckinv slepe im in too muc fucking pain to deal w more stress and now i have more things i have to do tmr#like it hurts for me to sit in a car for 5 minutes. tmr im in the car for 30x2 minutes with physical therapy in between#i dont know how im gonna do it man#i was unable to do shit last time iw as on the car that long#fucking rural ass small town that only has healthcare for rich ppl making me be in pain to get treatment for pain like fuck#hate this shit so much#hate my rural ass tourist town#hate not being able to see a local doctor#hate fucking dvds being so fucking fragile#hate buying shit online when u don't know if itll work (both secondhand and new)#pls just let it work downstairs tmr pls pls pls#ill steal the dvd player for a while and my mom can stuff it and use the other xbox for dvds till i get my own disc drive#pls i just dont want to have to argue my case to possibly return this bc i could be denied and im gonna scream if that happens#and i dont think my back can take the kinda scream im gonna scream if that happens#s2g i was ready to pay 3 digits for a working box set it was too good to be true to get it for less than 20 ugh#(less than 20 including shipping)
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Also naruto war arc has been supremely boring and it is making it very hard to watch it. Lol.
#speculation nation#fanny watches naruto#i watched literally 100 episodes in like a week and a half between asuma arc and pain arc#and now here i am. getting *maybe* an episode a day. if even. bc its just so fucking boring.#the entire sasuke retrieval arc team getting soul snatched and forced to fight in the spirit dome was just. so BORING.#like it was cute to see Shino and Ino working so hard to keep them alive. good character moments for them.#couldve done without the incredibly repetitive battle in the spirit dome tho.#only so many times i can see fang over fang or whatever before it gets. so boringly repetitive.#like these 3 episodes couldve been just one. or even less than that. come on man.#trying to bait myself with eventual sasuke but thats not even working rn. im just so fucking bored with this arc.#rememebring why i have never gotten past this point in the anime Or manga. lol.
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urghdjf i need an interest to just absolutely throw myself into
#most promising rn is greco roman mythology/history but also i want a research phase w some sort of animal just not sure which i want to#tackle first. or how#or when. that is the main issue actually. winter break i guess idk#personal#for now i’ll just have to settle for physics because HOLY SHIT it is going so bad rn i cannot stress enough how poorly i am doing in this#class. i have never done this bad ever and passing it is going to be such a pain <- hang on need to say that when i typed that autocorrect#suggested a bunch of bread emojis that’s really funny actually. anyway. going to be such a pain if it’s even possible#met w my physics prof today to go over a game plan and he says it is ‘not at all out of the realm of possibility’ but oh my god. i cannot#believe how much i am stressing over the prospect of needing to get like a 73 on the next two exams like that SHOULD NOT fill me w#unspeakable dread and fear that should be fine. and yet#also when i asked him if he hs any recommendations for resources besides our textbook he told me no i just need to use the textbook#‘properly.’ which. okay fuck you then <3 i read the chapters all the way through and take pages of notes on them like i don’t know how much#more proper you want me to get. clearly it is not working if i am averaging a 45% on exams. but whatever !#the physics chronicles#sorry that completely derailed from the original purpose of this post
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