#and you want me to still vote for them. Talking about how we have to be pragmatic about things and you think revolution is unrealistic
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dykedvonte · 1 month ago
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I think the most baffling thing about the Tulpar as a vessel to me is the fact that the ship really did only have a one way communication system.
I know it was cheap but even the most basic of vessels regarding major transport would have some way, shape or form for outside communication. Not only that but there was absolutely no form of innate emergency signal to show they may have been offline or in trouble despite clearly having a system to dock credits if they went off course. It's another factor that really shows that bad situations are made to get worse by design. One person who is required to relay all information to the crew and make all the choices without feedback. No way to update or call for help in case of a dire situation. No way to inform of inner personal conflicts and acquire procedures accordingly.
It really is like they are all in some sort of fucked up solitary confinement. They have their own world with strict roles that are meaningless in the end, as long as the cargo makes it, it doesn't matter what happens on that ship to the company. They don't want to hear anything and will come to conclusions on what happened based on how much pay they can withhold from the workers. Even what they do send is short, sterile and corporate to the extent it was likely written and sent out with a command by some random unmanned computer in an office.
There's something to be said about how unfair it is to force absolute power and control onto one person when you as an entity could do so much more to offload it but I've said it many times before so I won't again.
#its just like idk i dont think Curly was a bad captain because we only have this scenerio and I certainly dont think a man like Swansea#would like him or have very little issues with him specifically if he was incompentent or too lienent in the past but I do think the stress#was making him worse and worse as being a present leader as it dawned on him how much he actually had to handle like I really think he#just wanted to do yknow normal captain pilot stuff and fly the ship and yknow the little stuff like make sure things run right and over tim#the constant stress and strain of having to make every major choice started to grate on him and freak him out cause they cant even fucking#eat unless he pulls out the scanner and starts cooking like he has to choose the meal likely or have a vote and i make that part of the#reason he seems so indecisive and inactive is the fact he has to make the choice all the time and he's hoping he can at least make the crew#feel a little more in control of themselves as people by staying out of affairs like the game or disputes because god he literally has to#choose for them all the time like thats a lot of responsibility monitering their sleep their breaks food consumption thats all on him like#it really should be another persons job entirely as thats almost like absoulte contrl over the lives of everyone else that PE forces onto#that title and its also crazy how everyone accepts it even if they dont like it like they broke the food machine open rather than get the#scanner they all waited two months before Jimmy appointed himself leader its so scary how conditioned they all are to the environemnt#cause that sort of mindset is sadly real where people just wait everyone just waited until it was getting real dire and then they still#followed Jimmy without too many complaints like i saw a fic or post where Anya acknowledges they all kinda just let Jimmy do what they want#because he became the captain and it was stupid on all their parts cause they could clearly see how bad he was and yet he was captain so#they just fell in line to their roles and thats a bigger point towards how PE treated them and the complacency capitalism brings to you#just like something that irks me because idk I know Curly is slow to act but he's not as like unopinionated as people make him out to be#like he does try to find solutions but they are still restricted at the end of the day by what PE provides them and I think his biggest c#crime is being in his own head too much and not giving Anya that emotional stability cause like idk man was he supposed to go to Home Depot#himself and install like padlocks? even if the let Anya sleep in medical after she pointed it out she was already pregnant at that point#like we arent seeing the inherent issue that no one not even Anya herself was thinking of the preventative measures because a)there was a#point nothing was happening that necessitated them b) it would've been the responsibility of PE to address them pre and post incident and c#there is only one person on the entire ship given the authority to do anything. You can not make multiple important choices in one instance#in such little time and Curly should not have had that total power like i think the most interesting thing in takes that really blame Curly#is that level of control they give him over the company. Like again i think about the three days we miss between the eval/party and the#convo/crash like i think people switch them around as if those scenes happen in succession when they are broken up and its heavily implied#Curly and Jimmy just havent been talking vs the depiction that she told him and for like three days Curly was just chummy despite the fact#Jimmy and him just had a blow out fight like the next time we assume they talk is during the crash sequence cause he honestly hangs#around Anya more which i think is really important because she trust Curly to defend her himself but not his judgement to give her somethin#to defend herself as she knows he believes her but also knows she's not seeing the danger the same and its heartbreaking and more
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linagram · 2 years ago
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[ 𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚋𝚊 𝚗𝚊𝚘𝚖𝚒'𝚜 đšđŸ· 𝚟𝚘𝚒𝚌𝚎 𝚍𝚛𝚊𝚖𝚊 ] 𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚕𝚍𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚌𝚛𝚞𝚎𝚕𝚝𝚱
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naomi's vd is here! i think this one is a little shorter than the other ones? at least it definitely feels like a short one to me.
well, naomi's crime was basically solved on my other blog, so i felt like it wouldn't make sense to try and make it sound more mysterious than it actually is, haha. she's still a very interesting character to me though and i'm excited to see how her trial goes.
(divider link)
(door opens)
(sounds of footsteps)
Miki: I hope we didn't keep you waiting too long..
Naomi: No, no, everything is fine, don't worry about it.
Naomi: I understand that you two are quite busy today, haha. If I recall correctly, you have to extract everyone's songs today, right?
Miki: Y-yes..
Naomi: And I'm only the fourth prisoner. You still have a lot of people to talk to today.
Miki: *nods*
Naomi: Well, do your best then. I'm sure everything will be fine.
Miki: T-thank you so much!
Eiji: *clears his throat*
Eiji: I'm also here, just so you know.
Naomi: Of course. Hello, um..
Naomi: Is it okay if I call you both by your first names? You both are guards, so calling you both "Guard-san" is kind of..
Eiji: Hey, who do you think you are to-
Miki: Yes, that would be so much better!
Naomi: Great. Hello, Eiji-san.
Eiji: (to Miki) What are you doing? She has no right to call us by our first names like that, she's just a prisoner!
Miki: Well, I'm tired of being called "Guard 002" or "Guard-san's assistant" all the time. So yes, I prefer my name better.
Eiji: .. What happened to you?
Miki: Maybe I'm just trying to act more like a guard?
Miki: You can still say her prisoner number and name though. It's your thing, after all.
Eiji: I-I know that..
Naomi: Haha, you two get along so well.
Eiji: So, Prisoner 004, Chiba Naomi.
Eiji: Oh, you also were a teacher before arriving to Milgram.
Naomi: .. Yes, that's right. I was an elementary school teacher, to be more exact.
Miki: That's so cute! To be honest, I can definitely imagine you being a type of person who's good with children.
Naomi: !..
Naomi: Y-yes, a lot of people have told me that..
Eiji: So, an elementary school teacher..
Eiji: Even someone who spent so much time with children still ended up becoming a murderer.
Eiji: There's really no hope for all of you.
Naomi: Yes, I won't deny that I really did murder someone.
Miki: U-um, before we discuss that..
Miki: How about we talk about your life in Milgram?
Naomi: Well.. Sure, why not?
Miki: Do you get along well with other prisoners?
Naomi: Hm, let me think..
Naomi: Other prisoners are very.. interesting people.
Eiji: You mean they're all insane.
Naomi: *laughs* I don't really have a right to judge them for their behavior and for what they've done. I'm just like them, after all.
Naomi: I can't imagine some of them being criminals at all though..
Naomi: Like Yurika-san. She's so kind and gentle!
Naomi: And Aimi-chan. She's such a sweet and polite girl!
Eiji: You haven't mentioned Asahi though.
Eiji: Don't you think it's weird that he's here, since, you know, he's a child?
Naomi: ...
Naomi: Kids can be very cruel too, Eiji-san.
Naomi: Of course, a lot of prisoners here are children. Akio-kun, Aimi-chan, Riku-kun..
Naomi: But.. um.. Asahi-kun definitely seems like the type of child who is not as pure and innocent as you'd expect a child to be.
Eiji: It's like you had to deal with kids like that in the past.
Naomi: You're right.
Naomi: I love kids, I really do, but some of them..
Naomi: .. Can be more evil than any adults.
Naomi: And yes, usually people say that it's okay for children to do horrible things, because again, they're children, they don't understand what they're doing!
Naomi: But that's exactly what makes them so evil.
Naomi: We always say that adults are responsible for what they've done even if they didn't know better, but why do we go easy on children?
Miki: Um.. because they're children?
Naomi: Miki-san, were you ever hurt by a child?
Naomi: And what about you, Eiji-san?
Miki: ...
Eiji: ...
Naomi: Think about it. Refusing to play with someone just because they're "different", making fun of someone for some stupid reason they've just made up, hurting someone and then blaming that person for everything..
Naomi: Children are capable of all those things.
Naomi: I can tell that you two have met children like that before.
Miki: H-how do you know that?..
Naomi: You two are still children in my eyes. I know that a child had to go through something horrible when I look at them.
Naomi: I had to help a lot of my students. Some of them were abused by their own family, some of them were bullied by their classmates, some of them were simply ignored by everyone.
Naomi: And I can tell that you were just like them when you were younger.
Naomi: I'll tell you more, I feel like one of you is still really angry at that child who hurt them in the past, meanwhile the other one..
Naomi: Feels like they were that child who hurt someone very badly when they were younger.
Miki: ...
Eiji: .. Stop it. Let's just talk about your crime already.
Naomi: You're right. Sorry.
Naomi: But before we talk about that.. Can I ask you something?
Naomi: Eiji-san, you want to vote everyone here guilty, right?
Eiji: Haha, how did you know? Was that so obvious?
Eiji: Of course. I hate every single Milgram prisoner.
Naomi: I see. In that case..
Naomi: Can you promise to vote me guilty no matter what?
Miki: .. Huh??
Eiji: Sure, I'd love to!
Miki: No, wait, Chiba-san, what does that mean? Why do you want to be voted guilty?
Naomi: Well.. Because I want someone to tell me that they don't forgive me.
Naomi: I'm sick of it. I know that my crime is unforgivable, but..
Naomi: I've never got punished for it.
Eiji: .. What do you mean by that?
Naomi: My crime.. was seen as something good.
Naomi: Well, not exactly good, but not exactly bad either.
Naomi: Sure, I've never actually told anyone that I was the one who did it, but I just know that people wouldn't say that I'm evil for doing that.
Naomi: They would be okay with that. Even my victim's family would be okay with that.
Naomi: So, please.. Tell me I'm guilty.
Naomi: I will tell you everything you want to know about my crime. Just promise that you won't forgive me like everyone else did.
Eiji: Oh, you don't have to worry about that.
Eiji: Now, about your crime-
(bell rings, machinery sounds)
Miki: No, no, wait! We need more time! We finally can talk to a prisoner who actually wants to tell us everything about their crime, we can't lose that chance!
Eiji: It's okay, we'll learn everything we want to know very soon.
Naomi: But.. Are you sure that video will be enough to judge me properly?
Naomi: What if you decide that I'm innocent after watching it?
Eiji: Well, if that video makes you look sympathetic..
Eiji: It simply means that you actually want to be forgiven.
Naomi: I..
Naomi: I DON'T WANT TO BE FORGIVEN! I DESERVE TO BE PUNISHED! I LITERALLY KILLED A CHILD-
Eiji: Prisoner 004, Naomi, sing your sins!
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robocops-a-christ-allegory · 1 year ago
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How are you gonna talk on and on about how we need to be more pragmatic when it comes to politics to get anywhere while your "pragmatism" leads to absolutely fucking nothing here and thousands and thousands of deaths in Palestine. Like obviously even if the democrats were doing everything they promised they'd still be fucking evil and I still wouldnt vote for them while they continue to fund Israel but like we're not even winning anything. You're talking about how we need to be smart and logical to get anywhere and we're not getting anywhere.
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kristasummers · 11 months ago
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Friendly reminder that voter-shaming doesn’t work and parties and candidates should EARN your vote, not guilt trip you. You have every right to vote your conscience.
With so many elections coming up worldwide it's probably a good time to remind everyone that tumblr once got infested with agents trying to convince everyone not to vote, or not to vote left because the candidates weren't morally pure enough.
Also a reminder that they were better at tumblr than most of us, comrade interloper was great at memeing. Like, the talent!
Anyway don't fall for it. There is no morally pure option.
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medicinemane · 3 months ago
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"Watch Kamala COOK TRUMP
 then EAT HIM ALIVE!"
So
 youtube has decided I love the most annoying left wing pundits (don't know what I did to deserve it), but they have some of the most amazing titles for their stuff like
 uh huh, surprised no one else is reporting on this pretty massive election update, but you probably know what you're talking about crazy youtuber
(Now we know why he brought up Hannibal at that one rally, he was warning us)
(You know what, I mostly trust you people, but not 3 reblogs down and I'm not talking politics with loonies. So no reblogs, but you have my permission to plagiarize anything in this post for your own post, steal away on that title... I can even track you down a source... sadly I'm not funny enough to just randomly write that)
#like I really don't feel like talking politics cause people can't be normal about it#but that title was just too fucking funny to to share... especially when it fits so well with stuff recently said by him#anyway; if you actually want to talk politics; all I'll say is you've probably figured out how I lean#but what I'm gonna tell you is just to register to vote if you can; and to get a mail in if you can#(though bonus info I found out with mail ins; try and drop them at a drop point cause the USPS head is a clown with them I guess)#(hasn't fixed failures to deliver them on time or at all; and sorry; ain't gonna blame the rank and file postal workers)#(especially when he cut all that stuff right when he took the position... real sorry to hear he's still in that position)#anyway; I encourage you to vote if you can; and I'm not gonna say what way you should vote on anything#both cause it's not my business and cause I feel telling people to vote just annoys them; doesn't change their minds#I'd invite you to have a nuanced discussion so we can both expand our views but... will you forgive me if I don't trust anyone with that#people are rather unwilling to back their words up; and they're rather unwilling to listen to anything they don't already agree with#...which is why I try and step back and be willing to track down verification for claims I make with source in hand#and at least back down and say 'well... I heard; I can't find it'; or maybe a 'well seems like it wasn't quite what I understood'#I don't find others; even people I really like; extend that courtesy#talked with too many people who just kinda ignore what I say when it doesn't agree and take a tumblrina as a source#again; even people I like#and it just wears me down; so that's why I'm not gonna talk politics; cause despite the fact we should#I rarely find it's productive; it's only ever miserable#so please just appreciate how funny a title that is; and please try and ignore anything else
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chaoskirin · 6 months ago
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I'm not gonna tell you how to vote, BUT...
Here are some truths about the upcoming United States election.
Either Trump or Biden will win.
Our political system is designed around ensuring that either the Democrat or the Republican win. There is no "but if everyone rallies around a third party candidate..." argument, because...
Grassroots campaigns can't work. There are areas of the country that don't have internet or television. Congress just allowed the Affordable Connectivity Program to lapse, denying internet to even more people. There is literally no way for some candidates to get their message to huge parts of the country.
The Republican and Democrat candidates are backed by huge donor machines that enable them to tour a campaign trail. Independent candidates do not have this luxury.
Our country still uses a First Past the Post (FPTP) voting system, which is specifically designed to support only two candidates.
Our country uses an electoral (all or none) system, which is why you hear that voting for a third party candidate "takes votes away" from one of the major party candidates. For example, if Trump gets 48,999 votes, Biden gets 50,000 votes, and a third party candidate gets one single vote, Biden takes all the electoral votes in the state. All of them.
I really hope you make your peace with this now. Please, vote how you want, but with one candidate saying he will essentially outlaw transgender people, I can't imagine NOT voting for the only other candidate who can possibly win. Right now the polls are 50/50, which is absolutely insane to me.
In my experience, it's usually younger people who talk about either voting their conscience, or not voting at all to "send a message." I assure you, not voting doesn't send a message to the candidate who loses. Your message is only received by the millions of Americans who will suffer as a result.
I don't want to argue. I have no desire to fight with anyone over this anymore. And if you want to ask me "so I have to choose between two killers?" as a gotcha, then I'm sorry to say... The answer is yes. Those are the choices we've been given. And because the United States is no longer a true democratic republic, there's not a whole lot we can do to change that right now.
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assumptionprime · 1 year ago
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"I Just Don't Think That's Going To Happen"
Good news: I finally made a new comic!
Bad news: It's about something that sucks! If the good news here outweighs the bad, maybe support me on Patreon.
In the midst of talking about how much this sucks, I am extremely fortunate to even be able to move to somewhere safer. Please support those who can't, or who need a helping hand to go somewhere they can be themselves. (Give trans people money)
[Image description: Comic, sixteen panels. Panel 1: Robin speaking on her phone, clearly distressed, tears in her eyes: "I'm telling you that I'm scared. These people-- the kind of people you vote for-- want to take my health care, my rights away from me. I'm afraid I'm going to have to leave my home." The voice from the phone answers: "Well," Large dialogue text in a large white space between panels: "I just don't think that's going to happen." Panel 2: Robin, wide eyes still tearing up, stares in disbelief at her phone. Panel 3: A website heading "Home > News" above a headline that reads "Utah just banned gender-affirming healthcare for transgender kids. These 21 other states are considering similar bills in 2023." Panel 4: Another headline reads "Health care for transgender adults becomes new target in 2023 legislative session." sub heading continues: "Lawmakers prefiled many anti-trans bills ahead of state--" Panel 5: Robin looking at a tablet screen, concerned. Panel 6: Robin siting on a couch, watching TV. A speaker on the TV says: "After the anti-LGBTQ+ campaign prompted several protests and bomb threats made against the Boston facility, the group has now turned its gaze toward the Gender Health Program at Vanderbilt Medical Center in Nashville." Panel 7: Several headlines: "New Tennessee bill banning 'male or female impersonators' in public could criminalize drag performers and trans people" "Missouri lawmakers ban transgender care for minors, restrict coverage for adults" "Tennessee has passed a ban on gender affirming health care for trans kids. The bill's exceptions may only exist on paper" They headlines are accompanied by a map showing the severity of anti-transgender legislation in different US states. Panel 8: Robin's spouse Jordan sitting on the couch, looking up from her laptop toward Robin. Robin is gripping her arm tightly, a look of distress and sadness on her face, tears welling in her eyes. Jordan says "That's it. We're leaving." Panel 9: Robin taping the top of a cardboard moving box, looking over her shoulder toward Jordan, who is saying something as she walks away holding another box. More boxes are stacked behind them. Panel 10: Robin sitting at a table with a large stack of paperwork and holding a pen. She is leaning back and groaning: "Eughhhhhh" Panel 11: Robin standing with three friends, embracing as one of them speaks "I'm glad we got to see you before you left. We'll miss you." Panel 12: Jordan and Robin standing by the open trunk of their car. Several bags and suitcases are loading into the back. Jordan is shoving things in tighter and grumbling "It WILL fit!" Robin, holding a vacuum compression bag of full of clothing that has yet to go in the trunk, looks unsure. Panel 13: Robin and Jordan standing in the empty house, lights off, with sunlight coming in from the windows in the back doors and lighting them from behind. Robin looks upset, Jordan has a comforting hand on her shoulder. Panel 14: Jordan and robin sitting in the very full car, their dog in the back seat. Jordan is driving, Robin in the passenger seat looking out the window. Panel 15: Robin, still in the passenger seat of the car, now propping her head up with her hand on her cheek. She is looking down, seeming morose. Large dialogue text in a large white space between panels: "I just don't think that's going to happen." Panel 16: closer shot on Robin. Her gaze has shifted outside the window, her expression is now bitter, with tears gathering in her eyes.]
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jaylaxies · 1 year ago
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RULE NUMBER 1: DON'T FALL IN LOVE
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PAIRING: jake × fem!reader
GENRE/CW: smut, fake dating, fluff, slight angst, unprotected sex, drunk sex, blowjob, cunnilingus, penetration, usage of nicknames, themes of jealousy, mentions of sunghoon, heeseung, jay and mark, mentions of karina and yunjin, Imk if i missed anything!
WORD COUNT: 16.2k words
SYNOPSIS: your ex getting a girlfriend after just two weeks of breakup was enough to infuriate you to the point where you had to step up and make him regret breaking your heart. solution? fake date his best friend and make him jealous!
WARNING: 18+ content, minors dni
A/N: hihi, my loves <3 anonnie requested for me to make a jake version of my jeno fic and the poll voted in support so here we are! (both fics are mine) i hope you guys enjoy it! all likes, comments, reblogs are highly appreciated! it keeps me motivated! iloveyou all and happy reading <33
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Drink and forget. 
That was your plan for the night, and what’s a better way to achieve it than attending a party with your friends?
“Woah! Girl, slow down,” Yunjin scolded you, taking the shot glass out of your hand, “it’s been half an hour, Y/n. If you take another shot then you’re going back to the dorm.”
You groaned, “you know why I’m doing this Yun. I should’ve listened to you and Rina.”
Heeseung almost whined, “what’s the point anymore? You didn’t listen to them and still fell for him instead of me which resulted in him breaking your heart.” 
That earned him a smack on his head by Ningning, who now turned to you with a smile to lighten up your mood, “it’s been two weeks already, babe! Let’s forget about him and dance—” she said, her last word trailed off as she stared at the party entrance, the same time the music got loud. 
“I can’t believe he left so easily,” you whispered to yourself, gulping down your sentiments before paying attention to where your friends were staring, turning around to look at the entrance gate. 
There he was, the reason why you had been cooped up in your room, crying your heart out. The reason why you were drinking to numb your feelings, yet it all went downhill the second your eyes fell on him. 
Park Sunghoon. 
His walk was confident, his sculpted face looked more charming than ever as he sported his ever so appealing smirk looking indifferent to what had happened between you both. 
Topping it all, he had a girl clinging on to his arm, giggling as she pulled his arm to be pressed between her tits. She was clad in a mini dress which barely hid her ass and your friends couldn’t help but glance back at you with a nervous expression on their faces. 
Your face, however, remained stoic as you exhibited no sign of emotions despite feeling the anger burning up inside you, your fist clenching as you saw them walk towards your group. 
You couldn’t believe how Sunghoon was the same guy who used to give you shy smiles whenever your groups used to sit together as he was a close friend of Mark and Heeseung. 
Your friends had warned you, they did, but you were so blinded by his innocent face and pure smile which held secret promises of sincerity and a hope of something more. You took your time to notice that he cared for you, even waiting outside your classes with a bouquet at times. 
He had you swooning, ignoring the warnings and signs you should have seen coming. His sweet talk lured you right into his trap, and you found yourself saying yes to him in a heartbeat, marking the onset of your honeymoon phase. It was dreamy, to the point even your friends were convinced he had changed his ways and finally decided to settle down. 
Yet, deep inside you could feel your gut telling you that it won’t last, and he proved it just right when he forgot your one month anniversary, when he forgot the flavour of your favourite ice cream, when he didn’t bother calling you or taking you out on dates. 
When he admitted that he was bored and wanted out. 
It lasted for two months before he decided to break up, leaving you standing by yourself in your dorm, tears cascading down your face before your roommates heard a broken cry leave your mouth. Yunjin and Karina never left your side after that. 
Others tried to talk some sense into Sunghoon but it was as useful as a chocolate teapot. 
The hope of him regretting his decision went downhill when you saw him with this new girl, barely two weeks after your break up, the corner of his lips turned up into his usual smirk as he stood in front of you all, getting no smile or greetings yet he wasn’t one to mind. 
It was a rare sight to see his best friend frowning, nonetheless a frown of disappointment settled on Jake’s lips. 
Despite the loud music and the array of sweaty bodies dancing all over the room, you could feel the deafening silence in the circle of your group until a small whine came out of Sunghoon’s new girl toy, who pouted and whispered something in his ear, giving you the opportunity to look at Yunjin, who looked equally disgusted at the exchange. 
The girl must have asked him to introduce her because he nodded with his usual smile, turning around to face everyone as he spoke up, “hey guys! Meet my new girlfriend.” He motioned at her to speak up. 
Her fake giggle made you want to throw up, and you noticed how you weren’t the only one who felt this way as Heeseung excused himself from the conversation, rolling his eyes, which made you smile. 
That didn’t stop her, “hi guys!” She exclaimed, dragging out the hi, “I’m Linda.”
A series of snorts and coughed up laughs emerged as she proceeded to introduce herself, which included you who tried your best not to laugh at her oblivious state, completely disregarding the fact that she was not welcomed here. 
No matter how heartbroken you were, feeling like a fool as Sunghoon’s eyes took your outfit in wasn’t something you’d allow to happen. You didn’t bother excusing yourself as you left the circle, Yunjin following you in a beat as you just missed the whine Linda let out at your disrespectful actions. 
“The fucking audacity?” Yunjin was furious, your inner turmoil matching her expression, “I can’t believe he’s got the nerve to bring that bimbo here.”
You wasted no time in gulping down your fourth shot, no one bothered to stop you this time, knowing well you needed it as you tried to keep your tears at bay, it was too late to say you regretted saying yes to the player. 
Your body felt hot as your mind clouded into a hazier state, the confidence overpowered your painful state, your legs taking you to your friends who knew you were drunk beyond your capacity as you danced with them, rolling your body and letting yourself free. 
Yet the one thing that never left your mind was revenge. 
You wanted revenge. 
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The booming voice of your alarm clock was successful in contributing to your raging headache as you opened your eyes with a deep groan, feeling disoriented and your hangover building up. 
“Fuck—” you muttered, shutting up your alarm. 
You were surprised to notice the medicines and a bottle of water that was kept on your nightstand, and you didn’t waste a second before gulping it down to help your headache as well as your parched throat. 
Being grateful that it was a Sunday, you slumped back down, trying to recall the night but the only memory that stayed in your head was the one of Linda squishing Sunghoon’s arm on her boobs. Your jaw clenched at how easily he moved on. 
Just then, Karina entered the room with a small smile. She was the only one who looked normal as she wasn’t present at the party yesterday. 
“Oh! I was just coming to wake you up. We’re all going out for brunch since no one is in their right mind to cook,” she informed you with an amused look, noticing how you were still wearing your dress from last night.  
A shower was exactly what you needed at the given point as you tried your best to get ready in fifteen minutes, your mind filled with ideas to take revenge, no matter how childish it sounded. But how? Well, searching the net didn’t help much. You weren’t going to post a bad picture of him in the name of revenge.  
It also wouldn’t work because it was impossible for him to have a bad picture, much to your dismay. 
You sighed, linking your arms with Yunjin and Karina as you got out of the car which the latter drove as you walked inside your usual diner to see everyone sitting together after aligning the tables. 
Heeseung pulled you to sit with him, he barely had his eyes open as Mark went on telling everyone how Heeseung got pissed drunk last night and made out with his knee while crying. 
The scene was easy to imagine which made you all burst into laughter at the poor boy who could only whine, “your knee tastes like mustard!” 
The laughter died down when you felt a repeat of yesterday happening yet again. It was a friends only brunch, but apparently, Sunghoon’s Linda didn’t get the memo. 
You could see his best friend trailing behind him yet again and you wondered how Jake handled Sunghoon despite his actions, which now made everyone uncomfortable to some extent. 
“Should I punch that asshole?” Heeseung asked, whispering in your ear and you sighed for the tenth time today, shaking your head as you completely ignored the two people and focused on eating and chatting with the ones who made you feel better, however, you could feel Sunghoon’s eyes staring at you. 
You just wanted to go back, already tired of the couple who couldn’t keep their public display of affection at bay. Now you were sure it wasn’t just the hangover that made you wanna puke. 
“I think I just lost my appetite,” you commented, causing the guy in front of you to snigger. 
You looked up for the first time to see Jake sitting opposite to you, sending you a smile once he saw you looking his way, which you returned easily. 
He usually kept to himself and he wasn’t the talkative one in the group. You had only talked to him while greeting him whenever your groups met, and once when Sunghoon got drunk beyond control at a party and so you had to call Jake to pick him up. Your interactions were limited to him because of one person. 
Your smile dropped the second you heard that annoying giggle again, Jake only looked your way with a small frown after as you averted your gaze back to your lap, gulping down your anger. 
The sound of a message notification from your phone grabbed your attention, and you opened it to find your group chat being active. 
Uni haters đŸ€ŹđŸ‘ŠđŸŒ (minus Sunghoon) mOrk: uhh yo guys this is awkward 😬 heedungie: can’t believe i lost my title of annoying king to sunghoon’s gf??? đŸ€Ź ningx2: she’s not even a guy yunjinnie: but she’s annoying ningx2: can’t argue w that đŸ€Ș rinaa: let’s just eat and leave as soon as we can, the air is suffocating me đŸ€• you: too late i can’t eat anymore đŸ€Ą jay: im leaving i can’t w this bullshit, she didn’t even wear her wig properly  mOrk: holy shit? she’s got a wig on?!?! 😹 You laughed as you noticed Jay calling the waiter for the bill, which you all split as soon as you could and made your way out of the suffocating place, leaving the two in there as Jake too, decided to leave early. 
The drive back home was barely five minutes long, which soothed your nerves as you sang along to old songs Yunjin played on the speakers. 
They could notice how you looked exhausted, but it was more than that, they knew you had something in your mind and it was related to none other than your ex. 
“Okay, what’s going on?” Yunjin asked once you entered your shared dorm room. 
“What do you mean? I’m perfectly fine!” You tried laughing but it came out fake, causing Karina to raise her brows. 
“Spill. Right now,” she ordered, making you sit in between them as you clicked your tongue in annoyance, which wasn’t directed to them. 
“Fine. I want revenge,” you confessed, “he looks so happy and unbothered as if nothing happened? How can he say hi to me as if it’s the most casual thing in this world after he broke up with me saying he got bored? Ugh I hate his guts!” You ranted. 
“So, do you have any plans for that?” Yunjin asked. 
“Not really,” you muttered, “safari really recommended me to flirt with other guys in front of him,” you laughed, picking at the pillow cover of your couch. 
Yunjin refrained herself from snorting, “would he be jealous of a random guy though?” 
Karina laughed along, “yeah it’s not like you can date his best friend to make him jealous?” 
Your eyes widened, your head turning slowly as your lips curled into a devilish grin, immediately causing your friends to exchange nervous glances and speak up. 
“Don’t fucking tell me you’re considering this,” Karina blinked, incredulous. 
“Listen—” you started, only to be cut off midway. 
“No way,” a breathy laugh left Yunjin as she tried to contain her words and make you understand without any cussing. 
“It’s not a bad idea, okay?” You tried to convince her. 
“So what? Are you gonna seduce Jake?” She asked. 
You laughed which sounded more like a pfft, “of course not, silly! We’ll fake date each other!” You said, face shining as if you had presented the greatest idea known to mankind. 
“Be so for real right now,” Karina deadpanned. 
“Lord, Y/n think straight. This is real life, you’re not in a cheesy rom-com movie or a book,” Yunjin provided her input. 
“I know! But I just have to make him jealous for what? A month before he gets bored of that Linda girlie, and maybe Jake would agree to it too!” You nodded at the possibilities. 
“I can’t believe this is happening.” Yunjin rubbed her eyes, “me either,” Karina said as they both looked at you with an expression you couldn’t decipher. 
Your smile only got wider, “this is the best way to make it work!” You announced before looking at Karina sheepishly, “please send me Jake’s number Rina,” you said in a sweet voice, knowing she was the social butterfly of the university before you waved a goodbye at them, walking into your room, formulating a plan alongside. 
“This is gonna be a disaster, right?” Karina asked Yunjin, sighing. 
“Oh definitely, it’ll be a show.”
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You walked in your room, contemplating if it would be alright to discuss this on text or if you should meet up with him, the latter option was more plausible yet scary because what if Jake laughed at you? What if he didn’t agree to work with you for the sake of his friendship. 
With such a stupefied idea, the possibilities were endless. Besides, you weren’t gonna ask for a lot, just a little hand holding, maybe hugging but nothing beyond that. You have to play pretend and smile a lot around each other. That would sell your drama and that would make Sunghoon jealous and realize that he lost a gem. 
You waited and thought about it for a few days before finally giving in. 
You took a deep breath, giving yourself a last nod of encouragement before you picked up your phone, saving the number Karina had forwarded you and clicking on his profile before sending a text. 
To: JakeđŸŸ You: heyy jake! đŸ„° it’s Y/n, can we meet up?  You wondered if that emoji was too much, but you did not get enough time to ponder upon it as Jake texted you back in a minute.  JakeđŸŸ:  Hey, Y/n :) sure, is everything okay? You: yess! i just need to talk to you about something :3 JakeđŸŸ: How about Starbucks at 5?  You: perfect, i’ll be there ^^ JakeđŸŸ: See you <3
Your mouth widened at the heart at the end of the text, before you brushed it off, thinking that he sent it by mistake, or to seem kind. You kept your phone on the nightstand, standing in front of your closet to select an outfit for your meeting. 
The plan was made, you just had to discuss it with Jake but you had never talked to him before, maybe that is why your heartbeat rose up. He was a good looking guy, there’s no denying that and you’ve heard that he was one of the smart ones too. 
You bit your lip as you straightened out your top, rethinking your life decisions. There was no backing out now. You looked in the mirror again, satisfied with your outfit and makeup. You knew you looked stunning as you grabbed your phone and bag before driving Karina’s car to your desired destination. 
The place was almost empty except for a few people who sat and worked on their laptops. It was easy to spot Jake, his dark hair shone under the dim lights of the cafe, he pushed his specs up for it to rest on his perfectly pointy nose, his lips parted ever so slightly as he focused on reading a book which you had never heard the name of. 
His aura looked calming, which boosted your confidence as you made your way towards the table he was sitting at. It was near the window, at the end of the cafe, which gave you enough privacy. Somehow the seating choice felt very Jake to you. 
Clearing your throat, you mustered up your courage, smiling slightly. “Hey, Jake!” You spoke, looking him in the eye. 
That was enough to capture his attention, he looked up at you with a smile that reached his eyes. 
He looked adorable. 
“Y/n! Hey, come sit please,” he said, gesturing at the seat on the opposite side of him. 
His eyes were soft as they looked at you sitting down, noticing a strand of hair which you tucked behind your ear, finally looking up at him, trying to find the right words to start the conversation. 
“Isn’t it weird how we’ve never talked before?” You chuckled, causing him to nod with a small laugh. 
“That’s true. How can I help you today?” He asked, keeping the book aside, carefully placing a bookmark before doing so. 
You kept your confident smile on, “I needed your help with this hypothesis I have,” you nodded as you explained it to him, and he was sure that the meet up was for academic purposes now, “so I need to take a little survey. Can you answer some questions for me?” You asked.
He nodded as you took out a notepad and pen from the bag you were carrying. 
“Sure, I’d be glad to help,” he smiled, eyes turning into soft crescents, which you stopped to stare for a second too long before realizing that he was waiting for your questions. 
You snapped out of your daze as you started scribbling on your notepad, “your full name?” 
“Don’t you know it?” He asked, confused. 
“Shh just answer, it’s the official protocol.” You huffed. 
“Sim Jaeyun.”
“Gender?” 
“Seriously—” 
“Just say it!” 
“Okay, fine. Male.”
“What’s your age?”
“I’m 20.”
“Introvert, extrovert or ambivert?”
“Introverted.”
“Marital status?”
“What?”
“Single? Okay. So on a scale of one to ten, how willing are you to help me get back at your best friend by being my fake boyfriend?” You asked, your smile never faltering. 
Jake blinked once. Then twice. “You lost me on that one,” he spoke up. 
His eyes displayed a mixture of shock and amusement, and maybe it was your figment of imagination that you saw him snigger but you weren’t the one to give up. 
Your lips jutted out in a pout, eyes shiny as you looked up at him, “c’mon! You won't let a girl beg for a little help, right? Especially when she was hurt so very deeply by the said ex, right?” 
Jake looked at you, your pout only deepening in the hopes of him accepting your idea. He only leaned on his arm, coming closer with an enthralled smile. 
“So what you’re suggesting here is that I fake date you to get back at my best friend for hurting you?” He confirmed and you nodded enthusiastically, “how’s it going to work?”
“Easy! Sunghoon isn’t the one who gets affected by a lot of things but if I date his best friend, that’s you, then he would get jealous and would regret breaking up with me,” you explained, “then I won’t take him back,” you announced, a triumphant smile on your face. 
Jake nodded, as if contemplating whether the offer was worth it, “what do I get out of it?” He asks. 
“A fake and pretty girlfriend of course,” you smiled, “and a chance to teach your best friend some manners,” you shrugged as if it was a win-win situation. 
Jake’s expression didn’t give out what he was thinking and you were patiently looking at him for some sort of answer, hopefully a positive one. 
“Do I have time to think?” He asks. 
“I would give you some but then I’m an anxious being,” you stated which elicited a laugh out of him as he never expected that coming out of you. 
But he had seen it all, the way Sunghoon behaved with you. He forgot all important dates, gave priority to his parties and the friend group which was potentially harmful for him, not to mention that his reason for breaking up was worse than the worst excuse, saying he got bored, only to find a girl two weeks later. Jake truly hated Linda as she accidentally broke his favourite vase while she made out with Sunghoon in their shared apartment. 
“Fine. How are we going to go about this?” Jake sighed, giving in finally as he saw your face practically lighting up with excitement. 
“Wait! Does this mean you’re in?” You asked just to be sure. 
“I don’t think I have any other option,” he teases but you don’t mind, you were simply enjoying the feeling of victory already, “so, now what?” He asks, finally realizing what he had gotten himself into. 
Fake dating. 
“Now, we’re going to set some ground rules, which of course, we’ll write down and sign as a contract,” you say, getting a page out of your notepad. 
“Like that one movie by Jenny Han?” He raised his brows. 
You stopped to think for a second, “yeah but it’s not like we’ll fall in love or something,” you shrugged with a laugh and he nodded. 
Y/n and Jake’s rules of fake dating! <3
Don’t fall in love 
Hand holding is okay
Drive to the uni together 
Nicknames are a must!
Kissing is not allowed!!
Don’t tell anyone except for Yunjin and Karina 
Break up once the goal is reached. 
Goal: make Sunghoon regret breaking up!! (Additional: get rid of Linda)
Signatures
You passed the sheet to Jake, “anything you’d like to change?” You asked as he read it all, and you noticed his brows slightly scrunching as he did so, exactly how they were scrunched when he was reading his book earlier. 
“I’m assuming you told your friends already,” he pointed out rule number six, to which you nodded sheepishly. 
“No kissing?” He asked, “you know no one’s gonna buy it if we don’t kiss, right? But of course, if you’re not comfortable then it’s fine.”
You bit your lower lip, wondering if you should consider it since he was right. Kissing is the easiest way to show affection, “I think you’re right, we’ll do it only when it’s required,” you said, and he nodded. 
You wondered how he was so calm with all of this, and you liked that he was asking questions about it all. 
“What’s with the nicknames?” He read rule number four. 
“Sunghoon is big on nicknames, I bet he calls you some too. He used to call me princess,” you sighed, remembering how it used to be. It hurt but the current hatred overtook that feeling. 
“Alright, sweetheart,” he whispered. 
Your eyes widened at his deep, accented tone, but he only smiled, “just practising,” he said and you nodded, gulping down. 
“Okay, so is the list done?” You inquired. 
“Yeah, I just have to add one thing,” he said, scribbling down another rule while you asked him random questions. 
“Have you ever dated before?” 
He shook his head, “you’re my first,” he winked, and you wondered how he was so good at flirting. 
“So—” you were going to ask another question but it seems like he knew what it was. 
“I know I’m silent but it doesn’t mean I’m inexperienced,” he stated, and you were amused as it was the first time he saw him being this way, “besides, this deal of ours would benefit me by driving the girls away.”
“Right,” you snickered, looking at what he had written, “why PDA?” you asked. 
“Because that’s the key to irritate Hoon, especially with Linda around who sees no other seat but Hoon’s lap,” he explained as your face scrunched at the image. 
“You really are smart,” you muttered, signing the contract before handing it to him, who was quick to sign it too before you extended your hand. 
His big hand encased yours in a handshake and you couldn’t help, but notice how his fingers were slender, veins visible on his hands as his grip was firm on your hand. 
You had sealed the deal. 
Y/n and Jake’s rules of fake dating! <3
Don’t fall in love 
Hand holding is okay
Drive to the uni together 
Nicknames are a must!
Kissing is not allowed!!
Don’t tell anyone except for Yunjin and Karina 
Break up once the goal is reached. 
PDA whenever the target is around!
Goal: make Sunghoon regret breaking up!! (Additional: get rid of Linda)
Y/n       Jake 
Signatures
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“Listen, I know plans don’t work at times, there’s no reason to be sad over it—wait why are you smiling? There’s no way—” Yunjin asked as soon as you entered your dorm after your meeting with Jake.  
“He agreed,” you squealed. 
“You’ve got to be kidding me. Jake? The scholar guy who’s silent for the majority of the time, the guy who’s never had a girlfriend before, he agreed to fake date you?” Karina’s mouth was hung open and you only nodded excitedly. 
They both looked at each other before nodding, “now, you need a day out. We’re talking waxing, getting your hair done, and preferably your nails too since you’ve had that colour for too long and new clothes—” they made a list as they successfully dragged you out for all of it the next day, saying it’s a little something they’d want to contribute to your fake dating strategy. 
You didn’t mind a bit of it, being pampered was something you loved and it was long due as you had devoted all your time to crying after your breakup. 
It was when Monday rolled by when it finally settled in. You were going to pretend to date Jake Sim, in front of everyone. Your friends gave you last minute pep talks and you were more than glad that they had decided to help you dress up too. Just then your phone rang with a notification. 
JakeđŸŸ: Morning, sunshine <3 Ready to sell our show?  You: good morning!! i'm more than ready! are you tho? 👀 JakeđŸŸ: I’m already waiting for you outside, love ;)
You almost choked on the water you were drinking as you remembered the rules. 
You had to go to the university with him. 
“Bye guys! He’s here,” you said to your roommates, getting up and grabbing your bag as you made your way out in a hurry. 
Jake was standing by his car as he lived in the apartments and not the dorms, which was ten minutes away from your university campus. As for your dorms, they were a solid five minutes walk from your room. 
He looked up from your phone as he heard you walking closer to him, “hey,” he smiled. 
“So punctual, you’re right on time,” you said, “seems like you’re excited.”
He chuckled, opening the passenger seat door for you, “I can’t say I’m not excited to see other’s reactions,” he admitted as you sat down inside, thanking him softly. 
Sunghoon had never once opened the door for you. 
He got in the car, focusing on the road, “what’s the goal for today, princess?” He asked in his deep tone. 
You blamed your overly sensitive skin for the tingling you felt due to his voice, also sitting to notice how his face looked like a sculpture.  
“Soft launching our relationship,” you answered, clicking his picture. 
“In the cafeteria, during lunch then?” 
“Exactly! You just have to sit next to me and smile, that’ll be enough for Heeseung to suspect something,” you explained the basic plan just in time as you reached the university parking lot. 
“Why? Do I never smile?” He asked, getting his seatbelt off. 
“You do, but only to our group. Others are limited to a neutral expression only,” you pointed out as if you had analysed him fully. 
“Wait,” he stopped you from opening the car door, getting out and opening it for you with a tiny smile. 
Well that worked since people were nosy enough to notice a girl coming out of Jake’s car, which is a scene that never occurs. 
He politely offered you his hand as he helped you stand up. His hand was warm juxtaposing your cold ones, as he pulled you towards him, your shoulder pressed against his chest, which you could feel was chiselled, he definitely had pecks. 
“Smile, princess,” he whispered, and you overcame your state of hyper focus on him before putting on your best smile. 
“What are we doing?” You asked, your smile never faltering. 
Jake was somehow really good at looking at you with fondness in his eyes, he’d be a nice theatre guy if he takes up acting someday. 
“Dropping my girlfriend to her class, of course,” he said smoothly, and you started walking, hand in hand. 
“You’re pretty good at this. Are you sure it’s your first time?” You teased, noticing others staring at your hands. 
“Why? Do you think I’m a good boyfriend?” He asked back and you were truly amazed to see him retorting to your questions, given that you had barely seen him talk before. 
He felt your hand slipping and quickly intertwined your fingers. The gesture made sure to send a shiver down your spine. 
Sunghoon never held your hand while walking. 
“We’re just getting started, we’ll see how it goes,” you suggested, causing him to nod and continue the conversation you had left off. 
“So what you were saying back in the car is that people perceive me as someone who’s mean?” He tilted his head in question. 
“Of course not! They perceive you as someone who’s unapproachable.” You say seriously, you both stopped walking as you had reached the class. 
He blinked at you once. You blinked back. 
And you both burst out into soft laughter before he ruffled your hair slightly, bending down to your level, “study well, princess.” He winked, walking away to attend his own lecture. 
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You tried your best to focus on the lecture as you jotted down the notes alongside, however the feeling of thrill kept your leg bouncing the entire time, your mind working out possible scenarios with everyone’s reactions. 
Soon, the classes were over and it was the time for your lunch break, which also meant that it was the time for you and Jake to act in front of everyone else. 
“We’ll cheer for you,” Karina said and you could only laugh at her expression. She still couldn’t believe that you were going through with this. 
From the entrance of the big cafeteria, you could easily spot the table where everyone had already assembled. 
“Ready?” A deep voice whispered in your ear, successfully causing you to jump back. 
But Jake was quick to grab your waist and pull you closer before you could trip, his eyes equally widened as yours, “god! You scared me,” you said, breathing in deeply to calm your heart. 
You could feel his scent infiltrating your senses, it was a perfect blend of woody and citrus, which was also paired with slight musk and mandarin. He smelled really good. 
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to,” he said, letting go so you could stand straight. 
His eyes were full of worry, mouth slightly agape and you smiled to let him know you were okay. “Now, smile and talk,” you said as you both walked into the cafeteria. 
“Do I really never smile?” He asked you, “because people are staring.”
“I told you already! You smile only when you’re around our friends and we have never really talked before, at least in front of others,” you laughed. 
The whole group went silent as the two of you approached. Heeseung was the first one to raise his eyebrows as you sat down with him, but Jake didn’t sit next to Sunghoon. Instead, he sat down next to you. 
Linda, as usual, was sitting on Sunghoon’s lap, but that didn’t stop Hoon from staring at you and Jake. 
“Something is fishy,” Heeseung pointed out. 
“What is?” You asked, feigning innocence. 
Jake was silent when he wrapped his strong arm around your waist, pulling you slightly closer to him. You could feel your stomach tingling, and he simply smiled your way. 
“Firstly, I saw you getting out of Jake’s car in the morning,” Hee noted, “secondly, he was holding your hand and he walked you to the class. Thirdly, he’s been smiling nonstop.”
“Dude, no way!” Mark simply laughed, thinking it’s another one of Heeseung’s jokes. 
Ningning looked lost while Jay seemed to be focusing on your expression, “I don’t think it’s one of his jokes this time,” he said. 
“It’s really not!” Hee argued, glad that Jay was agreeing. 
“Does this mean—” Mark’s eyes widened. 
“—that they’re dating,” Yunjin said, acting her best as she widened her eyes, almost standing up at the confession. 
A series of gasps left their mouths, “what?” They collectively exclaimed. 
You tried your best to hold in your laugh as Jake turned to look at you, and from the side of your eyes, you could notice Sunghoon staring at you deeply with his jaw clenched. 
“They are! Look! He’s got his arm around her waist,” Heeseung exclaimed in an overdramatic way. 
“Guys—” you tried to say but Jake stopped you. 
“It’s fine, princess. They know now,” he smiled, pulling you even closer in a side hug. 
That caused Ningning, Mark and Heeseung to scream while Linda squealed, jumping on Hoon’s lap. 
Jake caressed the corner of your lip adoringly, “no need to hide it from our friends, baby,” he said before looking up, “Heeseung is right, we are dating.”
“What the fuck?”
“Since when?”
“Excuse me?”
“Did you fuck?”
All eyes turned to Ningning in disbelief as she asked the question, “what? I’m curious,” she shrugged, everyone looking at Sunghoon subtly to observe his reaction. 
You leaned into Jake’s chest, making yourself comfortable as you saw everyone chatting excitedly, your eyes settling on your ex for just a moment to see his furrowed brows and hardened eyes, a vein popping out from his neck. 
Day one, successful. 
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“So you’re dating now, huh?” Sunghoon’s voice asked Jake as he entered their shared apartment. 
Sunghoon was sitting on the couch, face devoid of expressions as he asked the question. 
Jake chuckled softly, gripping his bag tighter as he walked into the room, standing in front of Sunghoon, “yeah. Who would’ve seen that coming?”
That caused the other boy to chuckle along, but it sounded strained, almost ending with a scoff, “I certainly didn’t see it coming.”
“You don’t sound happy for me,” Jake said, his tone teasing. 
Sunghoon was trying hard to keep his fake smile up, “What makes you think so?”
“Your smile. It’s strained,” Jake pointed out, grabbing the bottle of beer in front of Sunghoon and taking a sip out of it. 
Sunghoon clicked his tongue, looking Jake dead in the eye, “how can you date her? What happened to the bro code?” 
Jake remained calm, “why? Weren’t you the one who was done with her?”
“She’s my fucking ex, Jake,” he snapped. 
“That’s right, she’s your ex. She’s not yours anymore, she’s my girl.” Jake smiled, keeping the beer back on the table before walking away. 
“Oh! And, try to be happy for us now, Hoon. I don’t want my princess to be sad because of us, yeah?” Jake gave him his infamous eye smile before returning to his room.
The plan was working. 
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You didn’t have morning classes the next day, which is why you had to walk to the main campus instead of getting a ride with your fake boyfriend. Yet you left your dorm an hour before your lecture to meet up with Jake as he had something to tell you. 
The one thing you liked about your University was its beauty, the gardens and fresh flowers only heightened up your spirits as you tried to find Jake in the garden of the STEM faculty, which was mostly empty. 
You spotted Jake waiting for you by a tree. He was reading the same book he had in the cafe the other day, you had also noticed how frequently he used to go to libraries during your relationship with Sunghoon. He loved to read. 
“Hey,” you said, standing in front of him with a smile. 
“Hey there, princess,” he replied, making you tilt your head. 
“Why are you calling me that? We’re alone right now,” you laughed. 
“For practice, of course,” he said in a beat before he handed you a cup of coffee, the exact one which you get from your favourite cafe nearby. 
“How’d you know?” You blink, surprised at his sweet gesture, also thanking him for it. 
He shrugged, “I’m known to be attentive,” he said. 
Sunghoon never knew your favourite drink. 
“Sunghoon talked to me yesterday,” he told you as you took a sip of your coffee. 
“Yeah?” You asked, stepping closer to hear what he had to say. 
“Yeah, he truly hates this setting. He asked me how I could date you.”
“Oh my god, he didn’t even hesitate? What did you say back then?” You asked. 
“Hold on—” he said, grabbing your waist and turning you around, his hand resting on the back of your head as he pushed you against the tree. 
“What’s wrong?” You asked, eyes widening as he leaned closer, making your heart beat out of your chest as you looked into his honey brown eyes which were surrounded by little specks of gold. 
“Sunghoon,” he breathed out, “he’s here and he’s looking our way.”  
To Sunghoon, it might look as if Jake and you are kissing but his lips are still inches away from yours, his scent pleasing your olfactory receptors as your ex only scoffed and walked away. 
“Oh,” you said in understanding. 
Jake only chuckled, “so, he went on saying how you are his ex and I shouldn’t be dating you,” he continued to tell you the story. 
Only Jake Sim could talk so calmly in such a compromising position. You wondered if Sunghoon had left already. 
“What did you reply?” You asked, voice coming out in a whisper as your body became aware of his hand which rested on your waist. 
“That you’re not his anymore,” he claimed, “that you’re mine now.” He said, breathily. 
You gulped down your nervousness. You knew it was a part of the act yet you couldn’t help but feel your skin tingling ever so slightly as you nodded. 
“Is he gone?” You asked, referring to Sunghoon. 
Jake blinked twice, finally looking up to see no sign of your ex anymore as he stepped back and you breathed in deeply. 
“The plan is working perfectly then,” you let out softly. 
He nodded, eyes crinkling. 
“I almost forgot,” you gasped, “Yunjin gave me this idea that we should go on a date!” 
“A date?” He asked, knowing that it’ll just be the two of you there. 
“Yes. It’s honestly just to make it believable. We can go out, click pictures and have a good time by eating good food,” you said, looking in his eyes for confirmation. 
“Sure, let’s do that,” he agreed, making you smile as you said you’d text him the details before rushing to your lecture. 
Jake simply leaned back, staring at your rushing figure with tender eyes. 
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Another week had gone by swiftly and the only thing that bothered you were the girls who came up to you, asking if you were truly in a relationship with Jake, to which you said yes with the sweetest smile you could muster, crushing all their hopes of having a future with your fake boyfriend. 
Heeseung was hellbent on knowing more about this newfound relationship of yours, Ningning simply wanted to know if the calm and silent guy was good in bed, Yunjin and Karina were amazing at acting as if they didn’t know it was fake. Mark approached Jake as he tried to get a few tips out of him since Mark wanted to man up and confess to his crush. 
As for Sunghoon, you hadn’t seen him for the past two days. He didn’t sit with your group during lunch, nor was in any of your shared lectures. Even his girlfriend came to ask you guys if you had seen him. Only Jake knew that Sunghoon had spent the past two days drinking at their apartment. 
That was the least of your concerns as Ningning kept asking you random questions. 
“Favourite hair colour on guys?” She asked. 
“Black looks heavenly,” you admitted. 
“And haircut?” She asked Karina.
“Anything as long as it’s not a bowl cut,” she winced, distaste for that haircut clear on her face. 
“But guys, undercut looks so fucking hot, you have to admit that,” you pointed out and everyone seemed to agree with you. 
The conversation was casual but Jake decided to take it up a notch and surprise you with something you had decided upon, yet never executed. 
“Let’s go on a date today, baby,” Jake suggested, again making everyone stop and stare at you both. 
“Dude, how are you so cool?” Mark whined, wanting to do the same with his crush. 
“I thought you were shy, but I guess the silent ones are the freakiest,” Ningning commented. 
“He’s literally talking about a date, Ning,” you sighed. 
“I can't believe he took you away from me,” Heeseung shook his head as you gave him a look. 
“You guys were never together in the first place,” Karina reminded him, and he sobbed dramatically. 
Jake looked at you expectantly, his eyes seemed bigger than usual and you could swear they were shining just the perfect amount. It somehow made you look away, biting your lower lip in the process before you nodded. 
“I’d love to,” you admitted. 
“Perfect, I’ll pick you up at five,” he said, grabbing his bag and swinging it on his right shoulder. 
He noticed how you looked happy this particular day, your face had a certain kind of glow to it and your smile was brighter. It seemed as if you were doing better now, and your friends really loved to see you this way. 
He bent down, touching your cheek tenderly, pressing his lips on your forehead ever so gently, making your eyes flutter close at the soothing sensation. 
“See you then, princess,” he whispered, looking at you one last time before going to attend his next lecture. 
“Did he just?” Heeseung covered his mouth. 
You were just as shocked as the others, not expecting any kind of PDA at all, especially when Sunghoon wasn’t around. That was the first time he had done it. You bit your lip yet again, looking down at your lap, trying to contain your smile. 
Yunjin and Karina looked at you before looking at each other with a knowing look. 
Then they smiled, wishing for the best.  
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“What do I even wear?” You huff in distress, looking at your roommates who looked like statues seeing your bed full of random clothes tossed around. 
“You can simply ask him where you guys are gonna go, it’s not like you’re actually dating and it’s a surprise,” Karina pointed out. 
You stopped, saying, “you’re right actually,” but then you whined, “I don’t wanna ask him such simple things, help me out guys.”
Yunjin sighed, mustering her stylist expression as she gave your wardrobe and your bed a once over, quickly getting all articles of clothing she wanted before handing them over to you, solving your problem in two minutes maximum. 
“Don’t you think this dress is a little fancy? I mean, we’re probably going to a local cafe,” You asked, cocking your brow. 
“Just trust me and wear this babygirl,” Yunjin said, using her usual nicknames. 
You had just finished applying your lip oil, concluding your makeup as you got a notification from Jake saying he was outside your dorm. 
You smiled unknowingly at the text, a feeling of excitement, or rather, giddiness creeping up your stomach as you bid your roommates goodbye, grabbing your purse and not forgetting to thank them for tolerating your tantrums. 
Walking out of the dorm and towards the exit, you stopped as you saw Jake leaning against his car, which wasn’t an unusual sight for you, however, you had never expected to see him in a black jacket, thinking that he’d be clad in his usual hoodies. 
His hair was neatly trimmed as he sported an undercut, which he didn’t have in the morning, meaning he got it cut right after your classes. 
Right after you revealed your liking for the particular haircut. 
“Jake,” you whispered, walking closer to him, noticing how he wasn’t wearing his usual specs either, probably opting for the lenses instead. 
He was lost in his own thoughts, his eyes fixated on the flower he held in his hand, completely immersed in his thoughts before he looked up to see you standing right in front of him. 
“Y/n,” he murmured, his heart pounding slightly as he noticed the light breeze gently swaying the hem of your dress, “you look beautiful,” he smiled, dissipating your jittering nerves and sending a wave of warmth through your chest. 
“You look so—” you tried to find the right word, eyes never leaving his face as you had never seen him look so bold before, “captivating.”
He laughed at your statement, “here,” he said, extending his arm and passing you the flower he had gotten for you, the tips of your fingers brushed against his ever so slightly, “glad I could captivate you, sweetheart,” he whispered, winking at you. 
You were left stunned, wondering where did he get his sudden boost of confidence from as you sat inside his car, watching him start the car, gripping the steering wheel normally, yet it made the veins of his hands pop out. 
You cleared your throat, “so, where are you taking me today?” You asked him. 
“Well, that’s something you’ll have to wait and see,” he teased, building up your anticipation. 
“Okay, is it far though?” You asked, falling into a conversation with him so easily, and he told you it would be an hour long drive, making you wonder where you were off to. 
There was something so endearing about others sharing their favourite things and talking about them, you loved to hear all of it and you felt even better seeing Jake comfortable around you as he went on telling you about the books he’d been reading and recommending the ones you’d like. 
One hour felt like a few minutes with him, time passing by effortlessly. Your lips parted in surprise once you saw where you were.
It was the fancy restaurant you’d been wishing to visit from the past year, but never got a chance to do so, “oh my god, I really wanted to come here to eat,” you told him, smile brightening and you were glad you had dressed up for it. 
“I know,” he said, extending his arm for you to hold. 
You looked at him, incredulous, “how?” 
“I asked Karina,” he admitted as you held on to his arm softly. 
You were thoroughly surprised at his revelation, knowing that he could’ve taken you to any normal place nearby but he chose this. You were in awe at how beautiful the interior was as you focused on the little details here and there. 
“You didn’t have to do so much, Jake,” you whispered, loving how his skin shone under the light of the chandelier. 
He shook his head softly, eyes never leaving your face, “I know it’s a fake date but it doesn’t mean that I’ll take you to our usual cafĂ©s, you deserve more than that.”
You breathed in softly, breaking eye contact and looking at your fiddling fingers. You felt as if your heart was beating out of your chest. Everything he did felt so genuine and well thought of. He cared about your likes and dislikes, he always took a note of your preferences. 
Sunghoon never did that. 
“You’re too fucking sweet,” you muttered under your breath so he can’t hear it. 
“Hm?” He asked, menu in his hands as he scanned it thoroughly for all possible options. 
“Nothing,” you smiled, getting your phone out and clicking a few candid pictures of him, which did capture his attention. 
“What’s that for?” He looked at you with big eyes, his face giving out the cutest expressions despite him looking tough in his undercut and newfound style. 
“Why not? Can’t post my boyfriend on my story now?” You asked cheekily. 
It was something you both had decided you’d do, the likes and replies flooded in soon as your friends were flabbergasted at the fact that Jake had cut his hair and dressed up so well. 
You both decided upon the dishes you wished to have and the waiter noted it down kindly, leaving you two alone to talk after. 
“Won’t you post me too?” You asked. 
“I will, you just have to wait for a while. I promise it’ll be the prettiest picture ever,” he said, full of confidence. 
“Well, that’s a challenge then because I don’t usually like my photos,” you smirked and he leaned in. 
“We’ll see how that goes,” he challenged. 
It was great that you could share any kind of emotions with him, whether it was you being goofy, him being silent, or you being nervous as he turns to be confident. It was a mix of everything. 
Soon, your food was served to you and even the scent of the scrumptious meal was enough to make your mouth water as you hummed with delight with just one bite, saying it melted just perfectly in your mouth. 
You didn’t notice him watching your eager face, loving your reaction as he felt like he did the right thing bringing you here. Until you catch him watching you. 
“Is there something on my face?” You asked cluelessly, pouting as you ate another bite. 
“Actually, yeah there is,” he said, leaning closer to caress the corner of your lip with his thumb, brushing away the crumbs gently as you simply sat with your heart pounding at his gesture. Even more so when he smiled, licking his thumb, “all done.” 
“You’re really so good at it,” you muttered, and this time he heard it. 
“At what?”
“If you do this,” you said, gesturing at your lip, “to any girl then she’ll definitely swoon over you.”
He raised his brow, “why? Did you like it that much?” 
An awkward chuckle left your mouth as you tried to dismiss his question, “I’m just saying,” you state, trying to be as nonchalant as possible. 
He only laughed, “alright, sweetheart.”
You whined, and the other families around looked at you both with soft eyes, thinking you both were cute together as his eyes turned into crescents at your behaviour. 
You couldn’t remember the last time you felt so at ease being out with someone. That wasn’t just all, Jake insisted on taking you to another place for a little walk. Night had fallen as you walked together on a rather empty bridge, yet it was a pretty sight—water reflecting the glistening stars along with the crescent moon. 
“How’s Sunghoon?” You asked all of a sudden, not noticing Jake’s smile faltering for a fraction of a second. 
“He’s coping in his own way. I bet he’ll be back to uni tomorrow. But he definitely regrets it,” Jake lets out slowly, “isn’t that your goal?” 
You stop walking, trying to find the right words, “yeah,” you whispered,  “but it’s not over until he confronts me himself. I need some closure,” you said, looking at him with a teasing smile now, “why? Don’t wanna be with me anymore?” 
He licked his lips, biting his tongue as he smiled, which you noticed was another habit of his, “of course not. It’s good to have someone to talk to.”
“Yeah? Then tell me more about you,” you said, looking at the water as you folded your arms over the railing. 
He was silent for a few seconds, joining you to lean on the railing, “I’ve always been the shy kid I guess. I was the one who always used to read sitting in the corner of a class and so, I never really had friends.”
You didn’t glance at him, letting him speak freely. Jake was one of the kindest souls you had ever met and it was obvious even in the little time you had known him. You wanted him to be happy. 
“Hoon was my friend ever since we were kids, our families are really close so he was forced to befriend me. He didn’t mind it, he was the kindest child and helped me talk to others, he was also the reason why I met you guys,” he sighed, “Hoon was always first when it came to everything, he led the way for me and I let him do that each time.” He turned his head, looking your way as he whispered, “until I realized I should’ve been the first this one time.”
You couldn’t understand what he was referring to, yet you understood that Sunghoon was dear to him, however his recent actions caused him to drift apart from Jake. 
A flash of light took you out of your trance. Jake had clicked your picture, “show!” You said, almost jumping closer to him and his shoulders rose up as he laughed when you tried to get his phone from his hands. 
“You’ll see when I post it,” he said. 
You whined again, “but what if I look bad in the picture?”
“You can’t ever look bad, sweetheart,” he said earnestly and you could feel your cheeks heating up as you closed your mouth shut, biting your lip as you looked away shyly. 
He chuckled, “let’s get you home now.”
You checked the time on your wristwatch, “oh, yeah. It’s late.”
You both started walking towards his car, getting off the bridge as Jake saw you shiver with the sudden gust of chilly air hitting you. 
He wasted no time in getting his jacket off and passing it to you, “here, it’s cold.”
Your eyes widened to see him wearing nothing but a white tank underneath which displayed his muscles as the moonlight accentuated it further. You never knew he worked out, your eyes travelling to his arms which were veiny. 
Jake looked unreal, almost like the bad boys you’d see in a movie but his well sculpted face made him look like a Greek god. He really had it all. 
You didn’t even notice you had stopped walking as Jake wrapped his jacket around your figure, smiling slightly as you reached the car, his scent enveloped you aa you hugged the jacket closer to you.  
“T—thank you,” you spoke, mentally slapping yourself for stuttering. 
“Can’t let my girlfriend freeze now, can I?” He stated more than asked. 
He helped you get in the car by opening the door, which he always did. It was another habit of his which you found endearing. He got in the car soon, looking your way before he leaned in all of a sudden, his face inches away from yours, causing you to stop breathing for a few seconds. 
The shape of his lips was beautiful. 
He leaned back soon, dragging the seatbelt with him as he secured you in your seat. The proximity reminded you of how he kissed your forehead in the morning, and your mouth worked before your mind could as you asked him about it. 
“Uh, so—why did you kiss my forehead in the morning?” You inquired. 
He most certainly was not expecting that question, and his expression gave it away, “your friends were watching,” he stated, licking his lips, “and Mark was suspicious as we never kissed before or did anything other than hand holding,” he explained. 
“Did he ask you about it?” You questioned, hugging the jacket closer to your body. 
Jake hummed as a reply, seeing you get comfortable on the seat with droopy eyelids, he knew you were going to fall asleep soon and he let you. 
His heart could only take so much for one day. 
He made sure to drive safe, glancing at your sleeping figure from time to time and he swore you looked like a baby when you slept. 
You reached back safely and he stopped the car, he didn’t wish to wake you up when you looked so at peace. He called out your name softly, coming closer to pat your shoulder. 
You stirred in your sleep, opening your eyes slowly to find Jake close to you. 
“We’re here,” he spoke, voice low. 
“Oh,” you blinked a few times, trying to adjust to the street lights as you got out of the car, not expecting Jake to get out along with you. 
You looked at him in question and he just shrugged, his muscles flexing in the process, “let me walk you to your door,” he said. 
Sunghoon never walked you to your door. 
“Don’t you ever get tired of being a gentleman?” You asked with an amused smile. 
“Not when it comes to you,” he uttered quietly. 
Heat rushed up the tip of your ears now that you stood in front of him, “Jake—” you whispered, “thank you so much for today. I can’t remember the last time I had this much fun on a date.”
A fake date, you reminded yourself. 
“It’s good to see you happy,” he took a step closer, “good night, princess.”
He was gentle as he slowly brushed his fingers on your forehead to tuck your hair behind your ear, he leaned in closer, his lips grazing your forehead in a featherlight kiss. You closed your eyes, the warmth of his kiss lingering on your skin as he bid goodbye to you. 
He was walking away by the time you could open your eyes and breathe again, not even bothering to ask for his jacket back from you. 
You looked around your place once to see if your friends were watching this time. 
They weren’t. 
Your room had a tranquil atmosphere as the moonlight coming from the window lit it up. Your roommates were already asleep in their respective rooms as you got changed into your sleepwear and took your makeup off, carefully keeping Jake’s jacket on the bed, not once thinking that your pillow would exude a scent like him too. 
It was hard to sleep, as if you had a feeling of giddiness bubbling up inside of you. Even after tossing and turning, you couldn’t find a perfect position to sleep, not to mention how your mind had created a montage of today’s date, replaying it over and over. 
You sighed, staring at the ceiling before closing your eyes shut, hoping you’d get some sleep before waking up for Uni in the morning. And slowly, you drifted to dreamland with Jake’s scent lingering in the air. 
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Your alarm clock was your enemy. You really needed a few more minutes to catch up on your sleep, grabbing your phone to see if there’s something that could drive your sleepiness away. 
There was. 
Your picture was the first thing you saw when you opened Instagram, it was posted by Jake instead of being put up as a story, which was unusual since he only had two pictures on his account—one of him and the other one of his pet dog. 
A soft gasp left your mouth, heart thumping out of your chest as you saw the picture. The flash made you glow and you had the tiniest hint of a smile on your face as you looked at the night sky. 
It was indeed your prettiest picture anyone had ever captured, it was exactly what Jake had promised. 
The caption, however, made you turn around and grab your pillow as you screamed into it, kicking your feet. 
My girl, that’s what he wrote in his caption, paired with a red heart. 
You knew it was for show but that didn’t stop the butterflies in your stomach from going feral. It felt too real, the gestures, the little things. It felt more real than your previous real relationship and you weren’t sure how you felt about it. 
It was another day where you had afternoon classes, and so you did not go to the uni with Jake. You had not liked or commented on the picture yet, pondering about how to go on about this. 
Jake had texted you twice, wishing you a good morning first and then asking if you had your lunch yet. You were tempted to reply but first, you gained a slight amount of courage and liked his post. 
You typed a comment with the first thing that came to your mind. 
You’re mine forever ❀
Your cheeks burned up as you kept your phone down on one of the picnic benches kept around the campus, as that was the exact place you were sitting at after your classes had ended. 
A very whiny and feminine voice called out your name, and you looked up to see Linda along with your ex and your fake boyfriend. The smile on her face was sickening and you wondered what they were doing together. 
Yet again, you did not think twice before getting up and burying your face in Jake’s chest, wrapping your arms around him in an embrace. This shocked Jake, you could feel him go still for a negligible second before a deep laugh boomed up his chest, you could feel him vibrate as he wrapped his arms around your frame. 
“Missed me that much, baby?” He asked, patting your head. 
Sunghoon watched the scene unfold with dark eyes. 
“I missed you so much, baby,” you whispered. 
It was the first time you had used a nickname on anyone, heck you never even called Sunghoon that. 
A cough separated you both and now you couldn’t muster up enough courage to look at Jake while he couldn’t stop looking your way. 
“Linda wants to have lunch together, like a double date,” Jake told you and you saw Linda nod excitedly. 
“It’s so romantic! We even got the lunch packed, see!” She raised her hand to show you two bags which probably had the lunch she was talking about. 
This day couldn’t have gotten more weird. 
“That sounds great!” You tried to sound cheerful but it only came out awkward. 
Good for you, Linda didn’t pick up your tone and clapped excitedly, “we only have thirty minutes because I have my salon appointment after so let’s be fast,” she spoke in a go. 
You noticed Jake sporting the same look of confusion as you, it was an awkward situation indeed. Sunghoon didn’t say a word, only observing you and Jake.  
Jake took the paper bag and got the packed lunches out. He had gotten you your favourite salad with grilled chicken as he opted to get the same dish for himself, not forgetting to get you coke, which you preferred to drink while eating. 
He really paid a lot of attention to your likes and dislikes. 
Linda really couldn’t read the room as she never once stopped talking about this new lingerie set she got for herself, “Hoonie liked it too,” she giggled and you tried to focus on eating, not having it in you to picture it in your mind.  
“I’ve told you not to call me that,” he spoke, his words harsh. 
That was the first time he opened his mouth ever since you started eating. Linda didn’t care, pouting slightly as she started talking again, “let’s play couples quiz!” She squealed. 
You could feel your headache growing with her high pitched voice. 
“Jake, when’s Y/n’s birthday?” She asked. 
He fixed his gaze on you, answering the question correctly. You tried not to be shocked, displaying your sweet smile for them. He actually knew a lot about you, the eye contact made you bite your lower lip before you asked. 
“Sunghoon, when’s Linda’s birthday?” You asked now, questioning him directly, which he did not expect. 
“Third of February,” he said and Linda gasped, offended. 
“That’s not my birthday!” She almost screamed, bickering with him for a solid minute as Jake passed you a few tissues, seeing the salad get on your fingers. 
“Okay, next question,” she said and she kept on asking him questions as if it was a rapid fire round and Jake answered each of them correctly. Your heart was thumping out of your chest, he knew your favourite colour, your favourite tv show and singer, your favourite cake and song. 
Sunghoon knew nothing. 
Linda didn’t know a thing about Sunghoon either, just like he never knew a thing about Linda. 
Sunghoon slammed his fist on the table, getting up and walking away without any second glance, you almost jumped with how loud the sound was, your hand resting on top of your chest to soothe your nerves. 
Linda ran after him, or rather she tried to run after him in her heels. 
“Are you okay?” Jake asked you softly, his fingers caressing your cheek as he searched your face for any kind of discomfort. 
You nodded, gulping and looking away. 
This wasn’t supposed to happen. Your skin wouldn’t stop tingling where he had touched you, it was almost impossible for you to breathe when he was so close to you. 
“Y—yeah, I’m okay. I think I should go and get my assignments done now, yeah,” you said, fumbling over your words as Jake frowned, wondering if he did something wrong. 
“Y/n—”
“I’ll see you tomorrow!” You waved at him, almost running away, leaving him with a dejected sigh. 
Of course, you didn’t have to answer his questions, he reminded himself. It was a fake relationship after all. 
So, while you laid in your bed with your pillow clutched close to your chest, Jake stood in front of Sunghoon at their apartment. 
“Since when do you eat salad?” Sunghoon asked, tone somewhat disappointing. laced with a hint of jealousy. 
“Y/n likes it,” Jake smiled softly, “It was hard not to like it after.”
“You hated coffee,” Sunghoon almost accused. 
“I like it now, it’s normal to develop your taste,” Jake replied calmly. 
“You’ve never gone on a date before, you’ve never had this kind of hairstyle before. You’re changing yourself and for what?” Sunghoon sighed, shoulders dropping when he accused him again. 
Jake only bit his lip, “love does things to you and I think I'm changing for the better.”
Love. 
That’s all Sunghoon had to hear before leaving the room. 
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“Why are you sulking, babygirl?” Yunjin asked you the next day, seeing you sitting with your blanket wrapped around you, a piece of chip in your mouth as you lazily snacked on it. 
“Nothing,” you mumbled, hiding your face. 
Yunjin rolled her eyes, “you were squealing in the morning yesterday, what changed?” 
You sighed deeply, “I guess I’m just feeling a bit down today,” you shrugged. 
She sat down on the bed, right in front of you before pulling you in the most warm and comfortable hug. It was something you appreciated even more this particular day. You felt conflicted with your feelings. 
It’s the little things, it’s always the little things when it comes to Jake, it creates a bigger picture for him. But for Sunghoon, it was only the larger picture with no elements supporting it. 
“That’s the problem, babygirl. I’m not gonna let you drown in your own blanket all evening. You’re coming with me to the party,” Yunjin stated, opening your closet to select an outfit for you already. 
Turns out that Yunjin can be a great manipulator because there was no way you’d be standing in the middle of a party with a vodka shot in your hand otherwise. 
Maybe drinking would help you, it always does. It’s almost pathetic how you’re ready to get shitfaced for a whole night just to get rid of intrusive thoughts, the thoughts which consisted of Jake and Jake only. 
You drank that shot in a go, getting another one as Heeseung tried to stop you but to no avail. Once you had taken three shots, all in a row, you turned around to find Karina, who looked as if she spent a while trying to find you. 
“Y/n! Where have you been?” She asked, grabbing your hand, “come, we’re gonna play upstairs.” Without much fighting, she dragged you upstairs and Heeseung followed behind. 
You wondered what Jake would be doing right now. 
The multicoloured lights were shining bright as they covered the expanse of the whole staircase, which you had trouble walking up, courtesy of your heels and a very short dress. 
Karina opened the door to a room and your eyes immediately scanned the surroundings to understand who you were going to deal with tonight. 
It was your whole friend group and some of their mutual friends too, however that wasn’t why you stood frozen in your spot at the given moment. 
Jake Sim, the guy you had been avoiding since yesterday, was sitting in the same circle, the bean bags, sofas and chairs were arranged to be that way, as he sipped on a can of beer which he held in his slender fingers. 
Seeing him at the party was shocking enough as he rarely attended any, but to add on to it, he was all dressed up as well. 
He sipped on the drink, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down as he gulped. The side angle gave you the best view of his undercut and defined jawline, your eyes travelling down to his chest, which was exposed as the top few buttons of his white shirt were unbuttoned, a black leather jacket covering him up as he also sported a few rings on his long, veiny fingers, a necklace gracing his slender neck. 
You almost forgot how to breathe until Karina pushed you forward, which gained the attention of Jake, who smiled your way as he expected you to come over to him. 
Karina and Yunjin high fived in the background, meaning; it was their plan for you both to meet at the party. 
Your heels clicked as you walked towards him, it was as if you both were the only ones in the room at the given moment. He wasn’t being subtle as he stared at you, especially how he looked up when you stood next to him. 
“Baby,” he whispered, pulling you to him—which was something you never expected. 
You landed straight on his lap, his arm wrapped around you securely as the other one rested on your thigh, covering up your skin which was showing, courtesy of your short dress. 
Your mind blanked, you couldn’t think anymore as goosebumps rose up your arms when he spoke in his deep voice, the others also stopped to stare at you both as he was not the one to show affection in public. 
Heeseung and Yunjin teased you both, yet that wasn’t something you paid much attention to. You didn’t even see Sunghoon sitting in the same room, as if he wasn’t anyone to you anymore. 
“I missed you so fucking much,” he whispered, making you sit close to him, your hand working on its own as it held on to his broad shoulder for support. 
You should have been used to this whole fake dating plan of yours, yet you couldn’t ever get used to Jake’s constant surprises. It didn’t feel like it was fake when it came to him and it most certainly wasn’t a help how you could feel the alcohol kicking in, his hand felt warm on your cold skin. 
“Jake,” you whispered, looking at him with hooded eyes. 
However, you never got to say anything further as others had decided on playing a classic game of twenty one dares. 
The first dare went to Mark, who was given the dare to kiss his crush who sat right next to him. 
“Why were you avoiding me all day?” Jake asked in a whisper when everyone else was busy cheering for Mark. 
You had no answer for it, nor did you have any way to control your heart which was thumping out of your rib cage with the proximity. 
You breathed out with a chuckle which sounded forced, grabbing a beer can which was on the table in front of you, “avoiding you? Why would I?” You asked, looking away. 
That wasn’t much help as he was quick to grab your chin, making you look his way again, “did I do something wrong?” 
His actions were bold, yet his voice was sweet and full of concern. You shook your head, resting it on his shoulder, “of course not,” you whispered, not having it in you to look at him, “you’re really perfect, Jake.”
He wasn’t given any time to react as others cheered. 
Apparently, it was your turn to get a dare and the evil smile on Jay’s face gave it all away, as if he knew exactly what was going on between you two. 
“I dare you to kiss Jake,” he smirked as everyone minus Sunghoon clapped, Mark nodding, still red from the kiss. 
“True, we’ve never seen you kiss,” Hee muttered in realization. 
You stopped breathing, seeing everyone cheering for you. You had fake kissed him when Sunghoon was watching that one day in the lawns, yet this was a whole different story when they were demanding an actual kiss from you both. 
Jake’s hand tightened around your waist, your dazed eyes taking in his expression as he raised his hand to cup your cheek, caressing the corner of your lips gently, as if he was asking for your permission. 
You knew you were drunk, yet all your senses made you feel as though you were the sanest person alive. The anticipation felt so painful and you could feel Sunghoon’s stare on you both. 
With a tender sigh, your eyes closed shut as you grabbed the collar of his jacket, pulling him into you. 
Your lips collided in a fervent kiss, your fingers tangled in his hair, tugging it ever so slightly, causing him to groan into your mouth as his hand supported the back of your head, tilting it slightly as your desire and passion fused together, transcending your surroundings. 
You couldn’t hear the whistling or screaming around your surroundings, your mind completely gave in to the pretty boy, who was kissing you like his life depended upon it. 
His lips were soft, perfectly moulding against yours as you moved them in harmony, letting the sheer pleasure take over your senses to the point you couldn’t differentiate between whether you were drunk which made you feel as if you were in the state of unadulterated ecstasy or it was simply Jake’s effect on your body. 
You didn’t pay attention to Sunghoon, who threw the beer can on the floor, walking away from the room, nor did you care about Linda who ran after him. 
All you knew was that Jake Sim was kissing you and he was exceptionally amazing at it. 
He squeezes your waist as you gasped, letting him bite your lower lip, lacking his usual self control as he mentally claimed you to be too intoxicating for him. 
“Hey! Get a fucking room!” Jay shouted. 
That was enough for you to break the kiss, your eyes still closed as your chest heaved up and down, blood rushing to your cheeks as you felt tingly all over, the shiver going down your spine all the way to your abdomen. 
Jake was already staring at you by the time your eyes fluttered open. His lips looked plump, slightly swollen from how you had kissed him, the veins on his neck seemed even more prominent but his eyes—they were dark, laced with lust. 
He didn’t wish to stop. 
You didn’t want him to stop. 
He got up from the chair, making you stand up along with him, his fingers quick to intertwine with yours as he pulled you with him, your wide eyes drifting to look at Karina who only winked at you, giving a thumbs up alongside it. 
“Jake,” you breathed, following him out and into an empty room, which he locked before pushing you against the wooden door. 
You could barely stand given how weak your knees felt at that exact moment. It most certainly didn’t help that Jake bent down to your level, the dim lights of the room making his skin shine as he asked you again. 
“Why were you avoiding me, Y/n?” His tone gave you goosebumps when you heard your name roll out of his tongue. 
Forming sentences felt like a tough job when his lips were borderline touching yours, “because,” you whispered mindlessly, wrapping your arms around his neck, “I couldn’t stop thinking about you.” Your voice was quiet, just like the room, which made it sound louder than intended as you looked him up through your lashes. 
His jaw was clenched, you could notice him breathing deep, his hold on you tight and you chuckled deeply, alcohol taking over your senses, “I can’t stop thinking of you, Jaeyun.”
You didn’t let him reply before you pressed your lips onto his, your bodies pressed against each other, mouths moving as your lips melded and parted, his hands all over your body, every touch igniting a spark in you. 
He tapped your thigh twice and you got the memo, jumping into his arms as he picked you up with ease, muscles flexing in the process but his lips never left yours while he walked towards the bed, helping you lie down as he got on top of you, your legs wrapping around his waist as your dress started riding up your thigh. 
He leaned back, eyes fixated on yours but you only continued to pepper kisses along his jawline, and down his neck, making him growl as he stopped you from unbuttoning his shirt. 
“You’re drunk, baby. I don’t want you to regret anything in the morning,” he says softly, breathing in your scent as he inhales deeply. 
“I’m not,” you whined, switching your positions to be sitting in front of him, trying to remove his jacket, before he stops you with his fingers wrapping around your wrist. 
He cupped your cheek as you looked at him sadly, “tell me, do you not want me?” You’d ask, playing with his necklace. 
“Fuck,” he muttered. He couldn’t hold himself back, not when your eyes sparkled with innocence and undeniable glimmer of need, “you have no idea, darling,” he chuckles, running his thumb on your lower lip, which was still wet from your kiss, “I want you so fucking much.”
That was enough for you to smile at him, eyes hazy as you slid off the bed and got on your knees, unbuckling his belt as you fumbled with the button of his jeans while Jake couldn’t believe this was happening. 
The strap of your dress slid down, revealing more of your cleavage, that’s exactly when you helped him get out of his jeans, revealing his boxers. Your fingers grazed his clothed cock, your lips tugging up as you saw him groan, even more so when you kissed his semi-hardened cock. 
His eyes never left yours during the entire time you teased him, getting his leather jacket off, leaving him in his white button up and boxers, which you pulled down in a go. 
A shiver went down your abdomen, making you close your thighs with how big he was. His cock was hard, leaking with precum that made your mouth water. He had the biggest cock you had ever witnessed in your life, girth and veiny too. 
He sucks in a sharp breath when you take him in your small hand, squeezing it a smidge before planting featherlight kisses all over his length, swirling your tongue around his head, he bit his lip as he took the scene in front of him. You licked big stripes of his length before taking his head into your mouth. 
That snapped him out of his daze, he couldn’t take your teasing any longer. Pushing himself up slightly, he spread his legs to accommodate your body between it as he grabbed your nape, gathering your hair in a makeshift ponytail as you took him in, your hands stroking the base where your lips couldn’t reach. 
“Just like that, sweetheart,” he groaned, pushing your head to hold his cock in you even deeper. 
You can’t help but think how he looks nothing like his sweet self in the given moment, he looks like a devil who’s thirsting for lust, his eyes dark and so immersed in your activities. 
His length throbs in your mouth as you continue your ministrations, quickening your pace as you sucked him off with all you had, hearing him growl made you realize how your panties were soaking wet when you release him with a satisfying pop sound, looking up at him again.
He sat straighter, his thumb wiping the saliva that was all over your chin and lips before pulling you up on the bed, spreading your legs to see a wet patch on your panties as you struggled to take your dress off. 
He chuckled deeply, “Oh, bunny. Let me help you with that,” he says, cursing once he sees you without any bra, his fingers tracing your neck, your clavicle and going all the way down to pay attention to your tits. 
However, that’s not all he does. Your toes curl when he yanks your panties to the side, immersing his tongue to tease your clit before he licks and sucks you thoroughly, humming against your folds as he gets drunk on the taste of your juices. 
His tongue prods on your entrance, pushing it in as your fingers grabbed his roots, tugging on his hair which also elicited a deep groan from him, your eyes rolling back with how ecstatic you felt. 
He fucked your cunt, pushing his tongue in while his thumb worked wonders on your sensitive bundle of nerves, making you squirm around, finally moaning out, “Jake, oh god!” You cried out. 
“That’s it baby, scream my name,” he whispers against you, the moist squelching noises filling up the room as you arched your back, your body shaking with how you could feel your high approaching, as he yearned for your pussy, not stopping once, as if he had completely plunged his body to focus on your pleasure and your pleasure only. 
You chanted his name as if it was a mantra you had to recite, and that’s exactly when you felt your stomach tightening, a teardrop leaving the corner of your eye, cascading down your neck as you allowed yourself to feel the unadulterated bliss Jake provided you with. 
It wasn’t the alcohol, you admitted. 
You were drunk on Jake. 
You breathed in deeply as he licked you up, finally getting up as he rolled your nipples between the rough pads of his fingers before he also removed his last article of clothing, leaving you to see the shadow of his abs and pecs clearly. 
“Tell me you won’t regret this in the morning, baby,” he breathes out, searching your eyes as his length brushes against your sensitive cunt. 
“I won’t,” you promised, “I want you, I need you, Jake,” you cried out as his eyes turned hooded. 
He silenced your loud moan with his lips on yours, your nails digging into his back as he gave a sharp thrust, filling you up till he bottomed out easily with how wet you were, kissing your tears away and giving you a minimum of two seconds before he grabbed your wrists, holding them above your head. 
“Do you know how pretty you look right now, bunny?” He asks, giving you another sharp thrust, this particular one hitting your g-spot, which had you whimpering out his name, “all mine, yeah?” He asks, thrusting harder, his hips slapping your ass. 
“Y—yours!” You managed to speak, eyes closing shut with pleasure. 
“Open your eyes, baby. Look at me when I fuck your pretty little cunt,” he whispers as your wail out when his cock hits your cervix. 
He takes his time to kiss and mark your neck, his teeth digging in as he sucks on your sensitive skin harsh enough to leave marks. 
It was effortless how he moved in and out of you so easily despite groaning about how tight your little hole was and you felt dumb, you couldn’t think, you couldn’t speak. You simply knew and felt one thing and that was Jake. 
He manhandled you easily, turning you around and lifting your ass up, your face buried into the pillow as your mascara smudged, just how your lipstick was smudged all over your cheeks. 
He thrusted into you yet again, smacking your ass as he saw it jiggle with the impact, another moan reverberated the room, which made him spank you twice more before he started fucking you again, your walls clenching around him with need as he gave you almost brutal backshots. 
“I’m—Fuck!” You cried out, almost passing out as you breathed in deeply. 
You both were so close, his cock twitched in you as his thrusts got sharper, “go on, bunny. Cream my cock like a good fucking girl,” he groaned. 
You withered beneath him as you screamed out his name with sheer pleasure as you reached your high, coating his cock with your juices before he also moaned deeply, fucking his cum into your glistening pussy. 
He breathed in deeply as he pulled out, staring at your cunt which was dripping with your juices mixed together. 
He sighed softly, holding you in his arms, “baby,” he whispered softly as you initiated a soft kiss, getting on his lap again as your heart beat rose up to the point you could hear it in your ears while Jake felt the same way. 
He could see how exhausted you were by how you started dozing off in his arms. He didn’t know what would happen tomorrow, he didn’t want to know. All he wanted was to have you in his arms now and freeze the time. 
It took him time to get up as he helped you get dressed up again, before he picked you up in his arms, getting down to see the party winding up. You were asleep and cuddling into him, his heart still racing as he saw Yunjin smiling at you two, “take her home with you,” she said, “and you better take care of her,” she added as a genuine warning, which made Jake nod earnestly. 
He would never hurt you.  
He really was perfect with how he took you to his room safely, with how he tried to remove your makeup even though he had no idea what he was doing, yet he was gentle as you slept with how drunk and exhausted you were. He made sure to change your clothes to his loose ones, just so you would sleep comfortably. 
He had fucked you, however he still was respectful and tried to not look your way while he changed your clothes. 
You looked so peaceful as you snuggled close to his pillow in his bed, he couldn’t help but stare at you with a soft smile as he kissed your forehead, “sleep well, baby.” He whispered as he slid under the covers next to you, holding you as if he was scared he’d lose you, his body shivering ever so slightly at the thought as he cradled you in his arms. 
Jake really was perfect. 
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Your body was sore, the sunlight almost blinding you, adding on to the throbbing pain in your head as you shifted around the covers, opening your eyes with a groan to find yourself in unfamiliar surroundings. 
A low cry left your lips as the memories of the past night flooded into your mind, the graphic details of Jake and you, the way he had asked you if you’d regret it. 
You didn’t regret a thing. 
And neither did you know how you’d face him after this. Yes, everything that started off as a fake relationship but even you couldn’t deny that none of it felt fake to you. 
Butterflies erupted in your stomach as you saw a little note on the nightstand saying—
Good morning, sweetheart <3 Please take this medicine when you wake up and also drink the hangover soup! I’ll be at Uni and will be back by the time you wake up, love. 
“Why do you have to be so perfect?” You whined to yourself, kicking your feet, “why do you have to make me feel this way?” You whispered to yourself, gulping and looking at the medicines and a bowl of soup on the nightstand. 
You didn’t realize that you were wearing Jake’s clothes till you spilled a little drop of soup on it, eyes widening for the nth time today as you gasped. 
You couldn’t stay anymore, you got up and rushed to grab your clothes, which were folded neatly before you changed into them with a rush, getting out of his room while you checked your phone, bumping into a hard chest. 
You winced, looking up as your expression dropped.  Park Sunghoon stood there, his eyes sad as he searched your face for some kind of emotion, any kind of emotion, however you didn’t give him anything, choosing to walk away but he was quick to grab your wrist. 
“Y/n,” he spoke your name in desperation and you tried your best not to turn around, yet you did, looking at his regret stricken face as he spoke further, “I broke up with Linda,” he started and you almost snorted. 
“Well, good for you,” you said, turning around yet again, only to be stopped. 
“Don’t fucking do this, Y/n,” he breathes, eyes watery, “I know you and Jake aren’t dating. Come back to me, baby, I regret everything I did to you, please?” He almost begs. 
“Don’t call me that,” you seethed out, “you know nothing about us and it’s too late, Sunghoon. I don’t want you.”
He didn’t let you leave, pulling you into a hug as you struggled to get away, “I know you’re angry and you don’t mean it. Let’s be together again, we used to be so happy,” he whispered. 
“And you fucking ruined it,” you cried out, pushing him away, “you ruined everything and you never cared about us! But y’know what? Jake isn’t like you. He’s kind, caring and he’s genuine about everything,” you let out, stepping away, “I love him.” 
Saying that out loud felt like you had lifted a boulder off your chest. Your face was equally surprised as Sunghoon, but you didn’t stay any longer, shaking your head as you rushed out of the apartment and got into the safety of your own dorm. 
You loved Jake. 
And you were sure he didn’t feel the same, it was all fake for him. You sat in your bathtub for hours, pondering and mentally slapping yourself for letting this happen but it was beyond you. Jake was so easy to love. 
What scared you the most that he hadn’t called you once, nor did he reply to any of your texts throughout the day. Your heart broke into pieces when he didn’t show up in front of your dorm to pick you up. 
You were sure he hated you for drunkenly acting up that night, maybe that’s why he kept avoiding you. You had ruined everything. 
The plan for the day wasn’t to attend the classes, but to find Jake. Every second that passed by without him talking to you felt like a punishment, as if your anxiety would eat you up through and through. 
He wasn’t by the lawns, he wasn’t in the cafeteria and you could feel your eyes welling up with tears of frustration when you couldn’t find Jake. Yet you didn’t lose hope as you thought that he’d be in his lectures. 
A big smile etched your face when you found him standing in front of his locker and you sprinted his way, which startled him. It was as if he didn’t expect to see you in front of him, his eyes leaving yours for a second before he smiled at you. 
It was forced. 
“Jake,” you breathed out as you felt fidgety, “can we talk?” 
He bit his lower lip, not answering for a few seconds before he nodded, guiding you towards the rooftop for privacy, not uttering a word throughout the way. 
You stood side by side, watching the cloudy sky as he finally looked your way, “congratulations,” he let out, trying to smile. 
You looked at him, confused which only made him speak further. 
“I saw you and Sunghoon hugging,” his voice broke but he gained his composure, “I know you’re probably back together now and you don’t need me—”
“Jake,” you whispered, shaking your head as you stepped closer to stop him, yet he continued. 
“We don’t have to fake date anymore,” he nodded, looking at his feet, “I’m glad I could help you forget about him for some time and also with your revenge—”
You were on the verge of crying by now as you whispered his name again. 
“I’m so stupid to have thought that maybe it won’t be fake, but I know you want Sunghoon—”
“Don’t you fucking see that I want you? Sunghoon and I talked, yes we did and I told him I don’t want him. I don’t fucking want him, Jake. You’re not a rebound to me, This isn’t fake to me anymore, I don’t think it ever felt fake to me,” you let out your frustrations, shutting him up fully. 
“My heart feels like it would beat out of my chest every fucking time I’m near you, this longing intensifies each day and it scares me so much,” a crystalline tear escaped your eyes and Jake was quick to cup your face, as if on instinct and wipe it away, “you do this sweet things no one ever did for me, you remember the smallest details about me that no one else seems to care about and I feel restless when we don’t talk. I’ve grown so used to being around you, it’s not fucking fake. I think—I’m falling in love with you Jake,” you finally let out. 
“You—you love me?” He asks, voice barely a whisper as he finds it hard to breathe and you nod, his slender fingers still cupping your cheek, “you hugged Sunghoon—”
“I pushed him away,” you said in a beat, “he hugged me, I didn’t,” you assured him, grabbing his hand which rested on your cheek, “I told him I love you.”
Jake pulled you in his embrace, his body shook slightly which broke your heart thinking how he had it all wrong, you never wanted to see him hurt, just like how he always wished for you to be happy. 
He held you tighter, making you feel safe as warmth bloomed up your chest, “I liked you ever since I saw you trying to play guitar with Jay on the day we met, but Sunghoon was faster to reach out to you,” he confesses and you part your mouth with surprise as he leaned back to look at you, chuckling ever so lightly, “I hated how he treated you but when you came to me for help, I got selfish and used this to get closer to you, even if it meant that I’d have to fake date you,” he muttered, pressing his forehead against yours, “but I fell harder each day, even more so when I had to hold your hand and it felt so small against mine yet it fit perfectly, when you dressed up so beautifully for a fake date with me, when you looked so adorable in my jacket, when you remembered my birthday and my likes which even I hadn’t noticed before. I fell in love with you, baby,” he smiled through the tears as you pulled him in for a kiss, both of you smiling uncontrollably as it full of tenderness and affection, your hearts beating together as you shared unspoken promises through it. 
You weren’t fake dating anymore as you looked at him with a silly smile, taking the document of your agreement out before scratching out a line. 
Rule number one: Don’t fall in love. 
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© jaylaxies | tumblr
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kaisturni · 6 months ago
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pillow princess | c.sturniolo
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→ chris x fem!reader
→ plot; traveling with the triplets, y/n usually shares the room with nick. in a sudden change of plans, she ends up sharing the room with chris. with the unexpected presence of one bed for the two to share, tension arises through the night when only inches separate them.
→ warnings; SHMUTTT, dom!chris, swearing, fingering, grinding, unprotected sex, cum eating, hair pulling, creampie, use of nicknames
→ a/n; this one has so much build up i didn’t even realize so sorry 😛 thank you to everyone who voted, hope you guys love it!
NOT PROOFREAD (sorry)
——————————————————————————
“that flight was terrible,” i groaned, the boys all nodding in agreement, everyone stretching their limbs every which way.
“honestly i just can’t wait to get to the hotel, anyway, i call sharing a room with matt,” nick says, as the four of us wait for your check bags to arrive.
“what! why?” i shoot a confused look at him, since nick and i are always the pair to share a room together, hell we have so many sleepovers, even sharing a bed isn’t a problem.
“because you fuckin snore, y/n,” nick states bluntly, i feel my face falling into offense.
“no i don’t!” “yes you do,” the three say in unison. i always hated when they did that. it’s creepy. but i’m confused at this sudden accusation, because nick has NEVER brought up anything about me snoring before.
i say my thoughts out loud “what are you talking about? even if i did, you sleep like a rock!” i retort.
“tonight is just NOT that night, besides we have to be up all day tomorrow to vlog AND film with sam and colby. besides, chris doesn’t mind your snoring anyway,” nick argues, chris shoots a cheesy smile and a thumbs up at me, i roll my eyes at the both of them realizing this is a losing battle.
“okay, whatever. just don’t keep me up all night,” i point a finger sharply at chris, since he’s always up until the break of dawn and even then has more energy than ive seen anyone have in the morning.
“noted.”
at least we’re not sharing a bed- i think to myself. not that it would necessarily be a problem, but for some reason he always made me so nervous. i dont want to admit it’s a crush, and i dont think sharing a bed with him would help with the aching nerves i get being around him. the thought of the circumstance makes me shudder. best just not to think about it.
✧ : *✧:* ✧ : *✧:* ✧ : *✧:* ✧ : *✧:* ✧
we all go to nick and matt’s room first, just to film some of the vlog. we all explore the room, opening every drawer and examining the snacks on the tv stand, and i admire how plush and soft the bedding is. at least i’ll sleep good on this tonight. chris seems to have the same idea as me, gripping on to the top part of one of the beds where it meets the headboard. i can’t help the thought of him doing the same thing but me beneath his body; the idea of it makes me squirm. i shake away the image as my ears tune back in to the conversations going on.
“that’s a really cool
 deck!” chris exclaims,
“that’s a REALLY COOL DECK,” nick mocks him, eliciting giggles from both me and matt, and i almost forget for a second that this isn’t the room i’m staying in, and i try to keep the conversation going as long as possible.
after about 15 minutes of filming, matt hands the camera to nick, giving the outro for the evening.
“goodnight everyone, we’ll see you guys tomorrow when we go explore austin,” nick says to the camera, then shutting it off.
after our own collective goodnights, chris and i making our way down to our own space. i’m so exhausted i can’t even hear myself think. my eyes linger down the dim hallway to matt and nick’s room. i’m honestly still a bit bitter about the whole room situation, i make a mental note to scare the shit out nick at some point during filming with sam and colby to get back at him.
i unconsciously smile at the idea of it, not noticing chris looking back at me,
“what are you smiling about?” he says with a little giggle, i reconnect my brain to my actions, eyes widening at what he could be thinking about me stupidly smiling as he keys us in to the room,
“nothing, just thought of something funny earlier. it was a pretty cool deck,,,” i say in a sing- song voice mocking him, he rolls his eyes “yeah whatever, it wasn’t that funny,” he states, i do a mental cheer to myself that he didn’t catch on to me trying to unconditionally hide where my mind was going to after he said those words; to be fair i WASN’T smiling at the thought of us sharing a room, but considering how i had been acting about the whole thing, i’m not exactly sure how convincing my explanation was.
the door opens and he flicks on the lights, after my eyes adjust, both of us are met with a singular king bed, identical headboard facing the city of austin, i can see my eyes widen in the reflection of the window in front of us.
i feel my cheeks turn hot, and i can see chris out of the corner of my eye glancing at me, also keeping himself silent amidst our little
 situation.
he breaks the awkward silence in the room by clearing his throat,
“gummy bears,” he starts, placing his bag on the plush white chair in the corner of the room, while i throw mind mindlessly on the floor trying my best not to think about the current situation
“i’ll be eating these tonight,”
“woah for free?” i say grabbing the bag from him, also making an effort to cut the awkwardness somehow still lingering in the air.
“no definitely for purchase,” he says walking around the room, “oh,” I throw the bag down, now uninterested in the snacks in front of me.
“what side do you like?” he asks, making himself comfortable right in the middle, arms stretched out on both sides, giving me a crooked smile.
cute.
“i prefer the left. but whatever side is fine,” i proclaim, doing my best to seem indifferent and not give him the impression that i’m going to be a pain to sleep with.
not like that, of course.
“good answer, i sleep on the right,” his smile doesn’t break as hops off the bed and rifles through his duffel bag,
“i’m gonna take a quick shower, won’t be long. put something on for us to watch,” i nod, and he disappears into the bathroom.
time passes as i’m left alone flicking through channels, eventually settling on a random movie i’m sure neither of us have seen before, this will do. i decide to find some pajamas of my own.
of course, my fucking luck and to my horror, i come up empty on a sleep bra AND shorts. i cant help but physically face palm myself at my lack of planning, but forgive me, i was anticipating on only nick seeing me in a lack of clothing.
i peel off the safety of the clothing i have on, and slip in to a separate thong and a t-shirt that is just barely covering my ass.
i’m so fucking stupid.
suddenly, the water shuts off and i race with myself to get back into my side of the bed to avoid chris seeing me and my shift in wardrobe.
he emerges from the bathroom, and i steal a glance at him, standing there with wet curls and his upper half still slick, highlighting all the muscles visible on his body.
the sight of him makes me heat up just to look at, and i cross my legs tightly to hopefully get rid of the aching between them, and flip my body around to face away, unaware to the fact that my ass is on display to him.
“no, no pants, huh?” i hear him let out a shaky breath from the other side of me, feeling my cheeks grow hot again, i make my best attempt to pull my shirt down and face him, beginning my ranted explanation.
“no yeah sorry i-i just was expecting to sleep with nick, this is what i usually wear i’m sor-“
he cuts off my rambling with a laugh,
“you’re fine, it just took me by surprise, that’s all. but you should probably move over, i think we should both go to sleep in a little,” he suggests, i can tell he’s being careful to not fully raise the covers, in order to avoid the exposure on my end.
i almost feel relief that he doesn’t care, but part of me wants him to care. to see him get hot and bothered by seeing me like that. but thankfully, yet unthankfully, this is a purely platonic sleeping arrangement.
“yeah, yeah you’re right,” i let out half heartedly, letting my eyes travel back to the scene on the tv, but i can’t help but peer out of the corner of my eye and notice how good he looks.
fuck.
his jaw tight in seeming concentration of the nonsense in front of us, hair messy from his shower, his chest slowly rising up down and rhythm and i almost let my eyes wander down his body to the waistband of his pants or even lower, but i don’t dare to allow myself the chance.
✧ : *✧:* ✧ : *✧:* ✧ : *✧:* ✧ : *✧:* ✧
my eyes shoot awake, and i prop my arms up to look at the clock a few feet away,
3:24am.
the tv is shut off, and chris is calmly sleeping beside me. i guess i had unknowingly fallen asleep at some point during the movie. i sigh and rub my face, beginning to make my attempt to fall back asleep again. suddenly, there’s a shift in the bed and i feel an arm snake across my hip and pull me closer.
i gasp and freeze at the contact, not daring to make a move. i feel chris’ hands squeeze at my hips, and a barely audible groan escapes his lips. my breath starts to pick up when i feel him harden against my ass.
i don’t know if i can take this. he isn’t even awake right now. he doesn’t know what he’s doing.
i quickly turn to face him,
“chris!” i whisper yell and shake his shoulder, with his hand still holding on to my nearly bare hip.
as he comes to consciousness, he deeply inhales and lets his eyes adjust to the darkness. realization hits him when he quickly removes his hand from me and darts up into a seated position. i can almost see him blushing despite the dark haze around us, the same feeling creeping upon myself for the nth time tonight as we sit in silence, which is quickly broken by his voice.
“shit, y/n, i-i’m sorry,” he begins, “i was just dreaming and, and i didn’t realize what i was doing I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable,” he explains. my brows furrow slightly as i realize the context of his words.
“what was the dream?” i ask, my own curiosity getting the best of me, but the confidence in knowing he was most likely having some sort of sex dream about me makes the lustful side of myself take over.
his head tips back, i can tell he’s contemplating his next words.
“you. y/n. us. right now. i always thought you were pretty, but you looked so fucking hot earlier, like you’re literally half naked in the same bed as me. truthfully I’ve had feelings for you, and seeing you like that
 it just made me want to fuck you,”
the last part of his statement is just barely above hearing level, and i’m honestly shocked at his confession. i didn’t think this would ever happen, that chris would ever see me in that way, but i got over that quickly.
i don’t know what came over me, but my actions and words only grew in seduction, and i was now determined to break him.
“sorry, i didn’t hear you, you wanted to what?” i crawl over and sit myself on his lap, placing my hands on his bare chest, and i feel his breathing and heart speed up.
“i want to fuck you, y/n,” he says in a single breath, and i take it as a sign to crash my lips into his.
the kiss is deep and sensual, his hands snaking down to my ass and squeezing, causing me to groan, and in response i grind myself onto him, feeling his dick grow hard beneath me.
the lack of material between us causes the wetness between my legs begins to rise quickly, and chris takes no time to comment on the state of my arousal.
“fuck y/n, i can already feel how wet you are,” he says between sloppy kisses, and one of his hands slaps my ass hard, the other gripping for dear life.
i gasp at his action, and his tongue fully enters my mouth, and i don’t bother trying to fight for dominance. all this new contact with him is already making me feel buzzed.
he flips us around so my back hits the bed, and i look up at him as he grips the headboard, our lips reconnecting in a matter of no time.
his hand gently tugs at my shirt, signaling he wants it off, and i inwardly smirk to myself knowing there’s nothing between my shirt and my bare body.
i swiftly remove it off my body, and even in the dim light he can see my chest, i purposefully squeeze them together causing him to bite his lip and move down to claim a nipple in his mouth.
i moan at the contact, he sucks hard at the sensitive bud, other hand snaking down to my panties, which i’m sure are now thoroughly soaked.
as if he read my mind, his fingers easily glide between my folds, and i whimper at the feeling.
“you’re so fucking wet—all for me, yeah?” he says lowly, those words coming out of his raise even more arousal in me, and the only thing i can do is nod and moan in response as he rubs my clit with his wet fingers.
he moves my black thong to the side, and i bite my lip in anticipation for his fingers to enter me, and he slowly inserts two, causing both of us to moan in harmony.
his lips rejoin mine, but the fast pumping of his long fingers inside me make it difficult to kiss him back.
i feel the knot building up in my stomach and i know an orgasm is approaching fast.
“c-chris, i’m gonna cum,” i breath out, shocked that i’m withering under my one of my best friend’s touch.
he hums at first, his pace slowly picking up, “cum for me pretty girl,” he purrs in my ear, i pant feeling the build up in my sensitive nerves release, him continuing to pump as i ride my high through his fingers, now covered in my own cum.
he brings his soaked fingers to his mouth, licking my juices off of his fingers,
“you taste so fucking good y/n,” he bring his hand down back to my folds, and i wince at the contact.
“suck,” he demands, bringing his fingers to my mouth, and i look him dead in the eye as my tongue swirls around his digits.
the eye contact pierced through me, and i let go of the grasp i have on his fingers with a pop, his lashes fluttering at the sound. chris’ lips meet mine again, and i hardly notice him removing his plaid pants, palming himself through his underwear and groaning into my mouth.
“is this okay? do you want to do this?” he asks, rubbing sweet circles on my inner thigh. how could i say no to him? we’re way beyond that.
i nod in affirmation, “more than okay, i want you, chris,”
chris smiles and swiftly pulls me to the edge of the bed, peeling away his last layer of clothing. his erection springs up, and i take a deep breath at just the sight of his size, tip leaking precum.
i instinctively spread my legs further for him, and he pumps himself a few times before aligning with my core, wetting himself between my folds.
he slowly pushes himself into me, and the sting of his size makes me hiss,
“i’ll go slow okay?”
i nod and close my eyes, and his forehead press against mine, pushing his dick further. i feel our hips meet and he pulls out almost all the way, before slamming into me.
fuck going slow.
i can’t control the loud moan that crawls from my lips, one from chris, “fuck,” follows soon after. his pace picks up; wet noises, skin slapping, and loud moans are the only sounds that fill the room.
he pulls himself out, and i prop myself on my elbows and give him a confused look,
“turn around,” chris grows, and i do without retaliation, sticking my ass far up in the air with my chest pressed against the mattress.
he wastes no time inserting himself back into me, going to his rhythm once again.
chris grips my hips so hard im sure they’ll be a purple hue in the morning, but that’s at the least of my concerns right now.
“god, you feel so good. you like bein a pillow princess, don’t you?” he huffs, continuously bringing our hips to meet at a pace faster than i think i can breathe.
the only way i can respond is through a muffled groan into the bunched up sheets, holding on as hard as i can.
he grabs my hair into a makeshift ponytail and pulls my head up,
“answer me. you like it, no- you love it, don’t you?”
“yes, i fucking love it chris!” i say as i gasp for oxygen, and he shoves my face back into the pillow, spewing praises and profanities into the air.
“i-i’m close baby, where should i cum? “chris says, his strokes becoming sloppier by the second, and i feel him twitch inside me, causing myself to clench around him.
“me too, shit, i-inside me, cum inside me,” i breath, way beyond fucked out to realize the consequences of those words.
with one last stroke, he releases inside me, and i feel myself become warm inside, both from him and my own cum painting his dick.
we simultaneously pant as he pulls out, and i flip myself over, feeling completely drunk off fucking him.
his body crashes down next to me, delivering sweet kisses to my face and lips, unlike his previous animalistic behavior just a few seconds ago.
“are you okay? how was that? did i hurt you?” he questions through pants, i giggle at the change in demeanor.
“i’m okay, it was perfect, and no you didn’t. i loved it, chris.” i say, running my hands gently through is slightly wet hair, some strands sticking to his forehead from the sex-sweat build up.
“i want to keep doing this,” chris starts
“me too-“
“but i want to be more,” the words leave his lips quickly, and his eyes focus between mine, analyzing my face, searching for a response.
“me too,” i state again, “but what are we going to tell nick? matt?” the idea of telling them didn’t cross my mind, but the anxiety of having to face them about that makes my heart race.
“we can keep it to ourselves— for right now,” the octave of his voice raising slightly at the end, posing his proposition almost as a question.
i smile and place a gentle kiss on his lips, “we can do that, but not for too long, okay,” i say after pulling away.
chris smiles warmly at me, “okay, but we should really go back to sleep. it’s 5:30,”
i almost get whiplash turning my head to look at the clock so fast, and i widen my eyes at how much time has passed.
“good idea,” i reply, shakily crawling back under the covers.
“you’re sleeping naked?” he questions.
“yes, is that a problem? you coming back here or not?” i raise my eyebrows at him,
chris shakes his head; “not at all, come lay on me,” he makes his way to his side and opens his arms for me, and i inch my way over into his warm grasp.
chris places a soft kiss on my forehead, and i can feel myself slowly drifting into sleep. i don’t think im going to scare the shit out of nick, my mind thinking of my previous vendetta against him; little does he know he did me a huge favor.
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rosie-read-that · 13 days ago
Text
one more afternoon / jake "hangman" seresin x reader
summary: your brother's best friend pays a visit to his texas hometown, and in spite of your resolution to get over your (slightly embarrassing) childhood unrequited crush, you can't help but admit that you're still down bad for jake seresin.
content warnings: f!reader, alcohol use, oblivious reader can't take a hint
word count: 14k (you told me not to apologize for long fics, so here it is, i present it without apology!)
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author’s note: hello, all! i wanted to have this out by thanksgiving, but i got hit with a stomach flu and then with a regular flu, so it took me this long to finish it. i hope the wait was worth it đŸ«¶ the title is taken from a song by maggie rogers. as promised, the next one will be a short (i mean it this time!) and spicy holiday-themed one for all the tyler owens lovers 💓 thank you so much for voting in the poll that got this baby written.
“Did you hear the big news?” Your dad bustled into the shop with his arms full of greenery, grunting as he set the bundles wrapped in newspaper into a bucket. At the counter, your mom paused her accounting and fixed your dad an eager stare. She loved news. “Jake’s coming home for the wedding!” he announced. He brushed his hands off while yours fumbled over the order forms. A few slipped out of sequence and fluttered down to the floor. You bent to pick them up, hearing your mom’s sigh of delight.
“Oh, that's wonderful news! Dinah will be so pleased, and Amanda, too. She was worried Jake wouldn't manage to get leave. You know how much she adores him.”
“Well, she's not the only one. Mike’s ready to throw a whole goshdarn parade in his honor.” The forms retrieved, you busied yourself with putting them back in order. Your dad laughed. “I haven’t seen the kid that excited since the day Gilly was born.”
“Ow!” You stuck your finger in your mouth, the taste of blood making you wince.
“Sweetie, are you okay?” your mom asked.
“Yeah, yeah, just
 paper cut.”
She came to your end of the counter. Taking your finger in her hands, she moved it this way and that, squinting at it through her glasses before she dropped a kiss on your head. “Mm, I think you’ll live.”
“Thanks for the diagnosis.”
“Don’t sass me!” she joked. “I’ll call Mike. Maybe we can all throw Jake a nice big barbecue, spend some time together like the old days.”
“He’ll probably be busy with wedding stuff,” you pointed out, mumbling around your finger.
She shot you a look that said spoilsport. “I know Jake, he’ll make the time. Besides, he’ll be walking with you at the wedding, won’t he?” Mom must have taken the shock of surprise for disappointment, because she smacked a hand against her forehead and said, “Oh, sorry! Me and my big mouth!”
It took you a moment to realize she wasn't talking about Jake.
“Don’t worry about it,” you said, making a half-hearted attempt to sort through the forms again. Your parents looked at you skeptically. “I’m fine! Josh and I are practically ancient history.”
Dad, bless him, took your word for it, or at least pretended to. He picked up the bucket of sage bundles and took it into the back, but your mom hovered, stroking your shoulder, cloyingly sympathetic. It was clear she wanted to say something but was afraid of how you’d react. Knowing her, she’d give you that hangdog expression all day until you gave her permission to spill the beans, so you gave a deep sigh and turned to her with a look that said, “Alright, let’s have it.”
“I heard he’s bringing Mia to the wedding,” she blurted out. “Amanda was livid. She said she would disinvite him if you wanted—”
“Mom, I hope you told her that wouldn't be necessary.”
“Of course I did! But she said it was a standing offer.”
Oh, bother
 Amanda was a sweetheart, if not a little overeager. As much as you appreciated everyone’s tact, it was also part of the reason why you still felt some awkwardness when you thought about Josh. Any time your friends or family brought up your ex, they looked at you like they were expecting you to fall to pieces, especially after word started going around that he had moved on to someone else. No matter how many times you insisted that they could refer to him normally and not as “him” or “you-know-who,” they thought you were being a brave martyr about it, pretending to take it better than you were for the sake of maturity.
“It’s not like that,” you explained for the thousandth time. “Josh and I are fine. And Mia
” Okay, so part of you did want to bash her over the head with a waffle iron. Still
 “Nothing untoward happened. We were already broken up when they got together.”
“Well yeah, but after only a month,” your mom scoffed. “That’s hardly enough time to get over a six-year relationship.”
You shrugged. “Maybe some things are meant to be, and some
 aren’t.”
“Oh, sweetie.” She hugged you from behind. You grimaced as she squeezed you tight and made cooing sounds. “You don’t have to be so civil about it. You’re allowed to be upset.”
“I know, Mom, thanks.” You patted her hand.
“Anytime.” You thought that would be the end of embarrassing conversations you didn't want to have, until she clapped her hands and said, “Look on the bright side - it’ll be good to see Jake again! For him to meet the baby - and won’t the wedding pictures be just darling? He’s so handsome! I know you’ll look just fabulous together
”
-
It was as much clichĂ© as it was ancient history. Jake Seresin - tall, tan, broad-shouldered, with a thousand-watt grin and a starring place on the high school football team - had been your crush since the moment you realized boys were more than just smelly, disgusting nuisances. Hell, you'd liked him even before the letterman jacket, around the time of his first growth spurt, when he’d come back from a summer visiting his aunt and uncle in California. From the porch steps, you'd seen him running into the yard to throw ball with your older brother, Mike, and your stomach had flopped and then flipped, and then flopped again. Looking back, Jake - a mere mortal - had an awkward phase just like everyone else, but you didn't see it at the time. To you, he was the dreamiest guy since you wore out your family’s Titanic VHS trying to feed your preteen fantasies of being Rose romanced by DiCaprio (before the ship went down).
Anyway, Jake’s awkward phase didn't last long. By the time he was a sophomore, he was playing on the junior varsity team along with Mike. Your sports-mad, overly enthusiastic dad gave them his blessing to turn the barn into their own personal gym, and while you complained about the unfairness of the world and the preferential treatment given to male athletes, you did find excuses to “run errands” and “pass through” so you could see Jake, shirtless, glistening with sweat. It didn't take long for Mike to notice. As a preteen, you weren’t exactly known for your finesse. While, in your opinion, you were doing nothing more than offering the boys a little lemonade - like Mom asked you to do - Mike would go back to the house for dinner and declare for all and sundry that he’d “appreciate it if you didn't salivate all over Jake like a peeping tom.”
“I do not!”
“Yeah, you do!”
“Mom, I swear it's not true! He’s making it up. You’re making it up, you buttface! You just don't want me hanging around—”
“Why would I want you hanging around? We’re training! You’re a kid, you're a safety risk!”
“Mooooom!” you wailed.
“Honestly, Mike, don't call your sister a safety risk. You're hardly grown yourself.”
“She called me a buttface!”
“That’s true. Sweetie, don't call your brother a buttface at the table, it's not polite.”
“Fine. I’ll call him a buttface later, like he deserves.”
No further comment was made about your crush on Jake on that occasion, but over the years it became your brother’s weapon of choice when he wanted to knock you down a peg, and “I’ll tell Jake you have a big fat crush on him” was a surefire way to get you to do whatever he wanted.
Once, you went down for a glass of water after you were supposed to be in bed and came upon Mom and Dad talking in the kitchen.
“—it’s a harmless little crush,” you heard her say. “We all had them at that age.”
“I don’t like it.”
“Of course you don't. She’s your daughter and you're finally working out that she's not going to be a little girl forever.” There was a pause. “You don't have to worry, Stan, I’ve given her The Talk.”
Ew, gross, ew! You wanted to crawl into a hole and die. Yes, you remembered The Talk and you didn't want to have it ever again!
Your face heated as you knelt on the stairs. Hearing about The Talk in relation to you and Jake made you think about the stuff you’d seen at your friend Tessa’s house on the TV one night during a sleepover. You had stared at the screen, titillated and kind of horrified at what the actors were doing, the way their bodies moved and the sounds they made. Once the scene was over, you turned to each other and burst into nervous giggles, knowing your parents would blow a gasket if they knew what you’d seen. Not that you understood it. You knew how babies were made, but you didn’t understand what sex was supposed to be.
And your dad was worried about you having it? With Jake?
“He’s a good kid,” your mom gentled. “He knows she's too young for him - I’m not even sure he's aware that she likes him. Even if he is, he treats her like Mike’s kid sister. She’ll grow out of it.”
“If you say so, hon. But God as my witness—”
“She’s gonna have a boyfriend at some point.”
“When she’s eighteen,” your dad declared, “and not a moment sooner!”
You padded back to your room. It wasn’t news, but hearing that Jake thought of you as a kid dealt a heavy blow to your self-esteem. From then on, you resolved to play your cards closer to the chest - you might not be able to help the way he made you feel like your insides had turned to melted goo, but no one else had to talk about it behind your back like you had some sort of disease.
Unfortunately, playing it cool was one of the hardest things you had to do during high school. As it turned out, Jake and Mike were actually pretty good at the whole football thing. Around the time they made varsity, you zeroed in on the fact that girls found their athletic prowess to be sexually irresistible; they were crazy about them - and crazy about Jake in particular.
You watched as he winked and blew kisses at a train of girlfriends while he was out on the field. He leaned against their lockers, turning the charm up to eleven and brushing strands away from their cheeks, saying things like, “Pick you up at six?”
When he got his first truck - a beat-up old Chevy that he bought off Don Amberley by working shifts at the hardware store - you’d peer around your curtains at the sound of his horn. Sometimes Mike would take a while to leave the house, and Jake would turn his head to kiss the pretty girls in his front seat as a way to pass the time. The shy ones laughed, warding him off with a light push against his chest, while the bold ones closed their nails around his shirt and pulled him even closer, all but straddling his lap. You watched with bated breath as he put his hands on them, green with envy, wondering what it would be like to have his attention, not as his best friend’s little sister but as an actual girl.
Your suffering lasted a whole calendar year, after which Jake went off to college, then joined the Navy, and while time made you realize that you needed to move on with your life and stop making up scenarios about a white picket fence and two-point-five children, you never forgot about Jake, who in your mind - and despite your best efforts - remained the measure to which you compared every other guy.
It wasn't just his ridiculously handsome good looks, though having the body of a Greek god and a smile that made your toes curl didn't hurt. He had helped you when you’d scraped your knee roller-blading, letting you lean on his shoulder and fetching the bandages from the downstairs powder room; he joined your mom in the kitchen to do the washing-up when he stayed over for dinner, saying, “ma’am, I insist,” which earned him funny looks from Mike, but it never swayed him into doing things differently. You liked that he’d earned his first truck, got good grades, was a loyal friend. To you, Jake Seresin was the full package and then some - what more could anyone want? And while you had long accepted that he would make another woman very happy someday, the way in which your family teased you about your “little childhood crush” never failed to put your stomach all in knots. There was nothing little about it. In fact, it had now lasted well into adulthood and you had a feeling it would never fully go away.
-
Dad was right. Michael insisted on being part of the airport welcome wagon, cringey sign and all. He even stuck Gilly in an adorable pilot’s costume. Your sister-in-law sent you looks the entire way and, like a saint, restrained herself by only once making a comment about “your brother’s true wife.”
You sat in the backseat, trying to will yourself into being less nervous. Maybe it was your guilty conscience; for some reason, you kept thinking about all the times you’d imagined him in bed, or in the place of one of your boyfriends when you were doing couple-things. Be cool, be cool, you kept telling yourself.
By the time you parked at the airport, you thought your poker face was pretty flawless. After helping Julie wrestle the baby things into the stroller, you made your way through the chaotic mass of people coming and going through the Barbara Jordan terminal. The weather was good. Jake had texted your brother to say that he’d landed safely and was waiting to deplane, and Mike, vibrating with excitement, was trying to stake out a place in the Arrivals hall that would show his dorky Welcome Home, Hangman! sign in optimal light. Honestly, it was kind of embarrassing to be seen with him. You kept apologizing to the people he elbowed out of the way, as if to say, “Move aside, I was here first, bud!” But it did strengthen your resolve to be chill because at least one of you had to be.
Finally, you spotted a familiar face in the line of passengers spilling into the hall. Like something out of a romcom, Jake Seresin spotted Mike standing in the crowd, dropped his duffle bag, and came bounding into his arms. They talked over each other between laughter and bro-y exchanges, while Julie snorted through her nose and even Gilly sputtered and snuffled. You could take the boy out of Texas, it seemed
 but back home he was still sixteen around friends.
Jake turned to you and smiled. “Hey, Cabbage.”
“Please, don’t,” you said, feeling awkward about the old nickname.
“Come here, bring it in.” He held out his arms, grinning, and there was no conceivable reason why you’d say no, so you steadied your nerves and stepped into them. He wrapped his arms around you. He smelled just as good as you remembered him - better, even, because a memory could never be as good as the real thing.
“You’re so stiff!” Jake pointed out, squeezing you tighter.
“No, I’m not.”
“What am I, your creepy uncle?” He looked down at you, then over your shoulder and spotted the baby in Julie’s arms.
His smile lit up his whole face and you felt your heart twist against your ribcage. You let out a breath when he let you go, trying not to fixate on the way his hand brushed against your shoulder as he did so, a slide that seemed to linger.
Fondness - that was all it was, you told yourself. He’d known you all your life and he was fond of you.
He turned his attention now to your little niece.With something like awe, he said, “Michael, you old bastard
” Then, “Sorry, little lady - you must be Gilly! Hi! Hi there, it’s your Uncle Jake! Your not-at-all-creepy Uncle Jake
”
“Nice one,” you threw back.
He grinned wider, saying, “Julie, how are you?”
“About as well as can be expected with a teething baby.”
“Well, you look great.”
“Liar,” Julie replied, but his comment made her stand a little straighter.
He let Gilly grip his finger in an attempt at a handshake. Being a sucker for attention, she wiggled her body in her mother’s grasp and held her arms out to the smiley stranger, wanting to be carried. Jake was thrilled. He bounced her in his arms the entire way to the car, asking about the wedding, his parents, how Amanda was doing, which of their friends he could expect to see on Saturday afternoon. Mike stuck to him like glue, carrying Jake’s bag for him and answering his questions. You were certain he’d send Julie to the back so Jake could ride shotgun, but instead, he loaded Gilly into her baby seat and Jake touched you on the elbow, saying, “I can take the middle seat.”
“You don't want the window?” you asked, your arm tingling. He had slipped on a pair of sunglasses once he left the terminal and he looked like a movie star, all golden skin, slicked-back hair, and a hint of stubble on his jaw. You had no idea how you were supposed to survive a 90-minute car ride when just the sight of him made you want to melt into a puddle on the floor.
“I want to sit next to my goddaughter. You get her all the time,” he pointed out and ducked into the car.
Helpless, you climbed in after him and pulled the door closed. In the back of the SUV, there was no way for your bodies not to touch. By necessity, your arms and thighs pressed together, his body solid and warm. You didn't want to draw attention to yourself by squirming away even though your heart was beating double-time and you were at a loss as to what to do with your hands.
Thankfully, the car started moving, and by the time you made it onto the highway you had almost gotten used to the feeling of his muscled forearms and the smell of his cologne. You were focusing on the passing landscape as he made small talk with Mike and Julie, so it caught you unawares when he turned to you and said, “So - it seems we’re paired up for the wedding. I’m sorry about you and Whatshisface, by the way.”
Here we go
 “I know that you name his name, Jake.”
“Do I? Persona non grata. I must have erased him from my memory chip.” He was grinning like the cat who caught the canary, and there was something about the twinkle in his eye that made you glare daggers at your brother, who was looking suspiciously blank-faced sitting in the driver’s seat.
“Oh my God, Mike, what did you tell him?”
“Nothing! I just said you two broke up and that he’s with Mia now.”
“That cow,” Julie put in.
“Okay, time out!” you called, doing the motion with your hands. “As much as I appreciate this show of familial solidarity, it’s really not necessary. Josh and I are cool.”
“Well, we’re not!” Mike said.
“Then be cool, Mike! And you!” You wagged your finger in front of Jake. He stared at it like it was the most amusing thing in the world. “You just got here. Do you really want to spend the rest of the week picking fights that have nothing to do with you?”
Evidently, the answer was yes, but he raised his hands in a facetious show of surrender. “Hey, I never liked the guy.”
“Dude, neither did I!” Mike crowed.
“What? You never said anything!”
“I’ve always said that - haven’t I, babe?”
“Mike, you say a lot of things,” Julie drawled.
“
including the fact that I never liked the guy! Him and his beady little eyes—”
“He gets hay fever!” you defended. “That’s not his fault!”
“—and the fact that he stayed in the apartment—”
“I wanted to move out! Julie, a little help here?”
“Hey, I don't like the guy either.”
“What?” You were flabbergasted. You thought that everyone liking Josh was the whole reason why they felt communally betrayed by the breakup. Now they were acting like the spearheads of an anti-Josh conspiracy? “Are you seriously telling me this six years after the fact? You went to games with him!”
“Wait, you went to games with Josh Spritzer?” Jake balked, his voice going up an octave while Mike went red in the face.
“I was in a dark place, man. Julie was pregnant and you weren't around
 It was a case of the pre-baby blues!”
“I feel like you just admitted to cheating on me. Josh Spritzer?”
“Hey!” you warned.
“I mean, I guess it’s all a matter of taste, sweetheart
”
“Seresin, what the hell!”
“
although God knows I never knew what you saw in him—”
“Oh, didn't you?”
“Hey, I love you all sooo much,” Julie piped up from the passenger seat, “Jake, I’m happy you’re here, but will you all shut up so Gilly can sleep?”
“Yes, ma’am.” Though Jake sobered up, the provoking glint remained in his eyes. Once more you were aware of his closeness and the heat of his skin.
“Unbelievable
” you said underneath your breath, crossing your arms, your reward being another one of Jake’s dazzling smiles.
-
When you arrived, the reunion was as rowdy as you expected. About two dozen Seresins and their closest friends and family had convened at Jake’s childhood home. Amanda cried when she saw her favorite cousin coming towards her, and she excitedly introduced him to her husband-to-be, a bookish engineer named Christian who came from a small family and seemed as flattered as he was overwhelmed by all the attention.
Dinner was served outdoors, buffet style. The backyard was strung up with twinkling lights and music played from a pair of speakers stationed at the back porch. The air was festive and full of hope; it was easy to get caught up in the pre-wedding bliss when you were well-fed, your glass never empty, the company some of your most loved people in the world.
Josh - thank God - was not in attendance. He was supposed to walk down the aisle with you. Your save-the-date and wedding invitation had arrived labeled with his name along with yours, the assumption being that of course your long-term, live-in boyfriend would be your date. After you’d broken up, Amanda had to reshuffle her arrangements to keep you as one of her bridesmaids, the only upside being that Jake’s uncertain attendance made him your perfect partner.
Well, perfect for Amanda, if not for you.
At some point in the night, after speeches had been made and dessert served, Jake took the seat next to you to chat with his great-aunt Sandy and her boyfriend, Clyde. The apple pie came courtesy of Mrs. Seresin, who had the best recipe in the county and probably the entire state of Texas, in your limited and yet eager opinion. You demolished it with aplomb and once you finished, Jake pushed his plate towards you, the crust untouched. “Have at it.”
“Are you sure?” you asked.
“I know it’s your favorite part.”
The fact that he remembered made you feel sixteen again, watching him come home from university, crushed at knowing that he had a whole life you didn't know about, people he knew who were probably far more interesting, sophisticated and self-assured. He joined the Navy, and then moved out west while you stayed behind in your hometown, stationary while he took to the skies.
He had always been nice to you, for all that he enjoyed teasing you and even making fun of you on occasion. But that didn't mean you would ever be anything more to him than his best friend’s sister, someone he indulged in the same way as Amanda.
You excused yourself from the table, picking up plates as a pretense to head inside and get a few moments to yourself. This was exactly the reason why you hadn't wanted Jake to come home. Selfishly, in your heart of hearts, you had prized your own comfort above Amanda’s happiness, which made you feel like a Grade-A jerk, but you weren't ready to confront the way he made you feel after all this time. How could you explain to yourself, let alone anyone else, that you were holding out for a fantasy you’d had since you were young?
Suddenly, the presence of everyone you’d known and loved all your life felt oppressive rather than a source of delight. You poured yourself a glass of wine from one of the open bottles on the counter and went out to the Seresins’ front porch. From there, the sounds of the party seemed far away and you let out a sigh of relief. You sat on the ledge with your back to one of the vertical beams, watching the night breeze move the branches on the trees and the clouds which obscured the waning moon. Gradually, your mind slowed its pace and you were able to enjoy the song of the night critters mingled with the distant music of someone - probably Clyde - strumming his guitar.
Your repose was broken by the screen door opening and then clattering shut behind you, making you turn your head to see Jake coming outside, just a touch sheepish but for the most part his usual Jake-self, out of his jacket and carrying a bottle of beer.
He lowered himself beside you, and after a moment’s silence, said, “So, how’ve you been? Aside from Whatshisface.”
You shot him a warning look. If he was bringing up Josh, it was only to tease you like he’d done in the car and you weren’t in the mood right now to be the butt of a joke - not when you felt so vulnerable about what he was to you. (Dammit
 and of course this has to be a wedding.)
“What,” he said, gently cajoling, “I can’t ask?”
“About my personal life? You never used to care.”
“In high school, I don’t think I was supposed to care. And afterwards—”
“Afterwards, Hangman got a little too full of himself,” you quipped.
“Hey
 that's
 actually pretty accurate, I’m not gonna lie.” He took a swig of beer, laughing as he said it. The porch light threw his features into sharp relief and you gave yourself permission to look at him - really look at him - for the first time since he returned.
Setting aside that he was gorgeous as ever, he seemed less carefree than you remembered, but it wasn’t a bad thing. He appeared, well, like a grown-up, for lack of a better word. You wondered whether you were being unfair in making assumptions when you had both changed so much in the last decade, as people tended to do. He wasn’t just the dream guy in your head; he was so many things in his own right, and he was here with you, wanting to talk - and maybe trying to get to know you on an even field.
If only that wasn't another reason to love him.
“You seem different,” you said, hoping your voice wasn’t giving you away.
He looked at you for a few breaths, the corner of his mouth tipped up but the rest of his face serious. Then he shrugged in mock humility with a “What can I say, greatness suits me.”
“Idiot
” You shook your head and let out a snort, though on the inside you felt full of champagne - fizzy and bright because he was with you.
“How's the shop going?” he asked after a beat.
“Pretty well. We’re doing the flowers for Amanda’s wedding.”
“And you're bridesmaiding?”
“It’s hardly flying F-18s.”
“I think Amanda would disagree.”
“Well, it is her wedding,” you pointed out, “she’s—”
“Out of her mind,” Jake enounced.
“She’s excited,” you corrected even as a montage ran through your head of all the times Amanda had texted the wedding party’s WhatsApp group to say that “a catastrophe” had occurred or that today was the worst day of her life because “the linen photos do NOT reflect the true shade. I wanted SAGE green - doesn’t this look laurel to you?”
“She’s my cousin,” Jake went on. “In fact, she’s my favorite cousin - which is how I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that she’s the biggest bridezilla this side of the Mississippi. To being wedding buddies,” he said and held his beer out towards you, “’cause God knows we’re gonna need it.”
“Wedding buddies,” you said, and clinked your glass. You waited until he had a mouthful of beer to say, “So, how’s your love life these days?”
“O-ho!” He nearly choked. “We are not doing that.”
“That hardly seems fair!”
“Age before beauty, Cabbage: I still get to make a few of the rules.” Watching your face work into a grimace, he laughed. “You really do hate when I call you that, don't you? Look at you! It's like a full-body cringe!”
“Stop it!” you complained.
The unfortunate nickname started back when you were a kid and had a penchant for a particular Cabbage Patch doll, which, in hindsight, seemed like an emotional support object, thank you very much. You carried it around until you were forcibly parted during Kindergarten - hence, Cabbage Patch, which in time shortened itself to “Cabbage.” It was cute when your mom said it, but Jake?
“You don't seem to mind when Mike calls you that,” he replied.
You narrowed your eyes. “I’ve seen Mike in all sorts of undignified situations. It evens the playing field.”
“I’d say we've known each other almost as long.”
“It is not the same.”
“How come?”
“It’s just
 not.”
“I’m getting nothing else out of you by way of an explanation, aren't I? Fine
” he dramatically sighed. “I guess I’ll stop calling you Cabbage.”
“You don't have to
”
“Nope, it's done, it's retired!”
“Thank you,” you said, a little embarrassed.
From the backyard came a round of applause as Clyde finished his song. Jake smiled at you, then leaned close with a devilish glint in his eye. “Are you sure you're okay with the whole Josh thing? We can always make it our mission to make him insanely jealous.”
You scoffed. “Please, he would never buy that. You and me? He’d see right through it.”
“I want you to know that your lack of faith in my abilities is deeply, deeply hurtful. I’m just saying! You haven't seen me in action!”
“Oh, I’ve seen you in action, alright
”
“There she is!” he cackled.
You hoped the laughter meant he’d missed the note of jealousy in your voice. “Besides, I don't care about making him jealous,” you said with a shrug. “He and Mia are good together.”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah
 Okay, look,” you sighed, “the only reason I’m telling you this is because you're not them, so I’d better not hear a word from Mike about anything I’m about to tell you. Deal?”
He nodded, and mimed zipping his lips closed for dramatic effect.
“There’s just
 no sob story about it,” you began. “By the time it was over, it was almost a relief. And honestly? If it hadn't been for our families, we would've broken up ages ago.”
“What was wrong with him?”
By the look on his face, it was like he expected you to say he had a funny snore or that he chewed too loudly or had an extra head. If only the truth were that tangible. He wasn't mean to you, didn't cheat. But he wasn't Jake. He didn't make you excited to wake up in the morningz
“By the end, we were more like roommates than boyfriend and girlfriend,” you explained. “I mean, when it happened, did I want to claw Mia’s face off, knowing she’d been angling for an opening for years? Of course I did. But that was more about my pride than anything. I wasn't heartbroken. I’m not,” you insisted. “But telling them that would feel like ruining Christmas. They're having fun slinging mud on my behalf.”
“And maybe just a tiny part of you enjoys it?” Jake asked.
“If you tell anyone, I’ll kill you.”
He laughed. “Do you really think I’m above a bit of harmless spite? Hell, I practically wrote the playbook. But what you said - about your pride being hurt? That goes for him too, you know. He doesn't have to buy the whole thing, he just has to see you moving on. Trust me, it’ll hurt.”
“Maybe I don't care enough to hurt him.”
Jake studied you, his eyes shining in the warm glow. “You really have grown up,” he said at last. “I, on the other hand—”
“Oh, come on. Jake, you’re all talk, always have been.”
“I beg your pardon?”
“The summer before your junior year,” you pointed out, “you spent nearly all of it replacing Will Delonge’s wooden fence and you told no one about it. The only reason I know is because Mom found out—”
“Your mom finds out about everything,” Jake lamented.
That she did. “You helped Arn McCallister with his math grade,” you added. “You asked Gina to dance at the Winter Ball when her friends made that bet—”
“Some friends,” he interjected. “I swear, Fiona Brussaurd still scares the shit out of me. What, were you keeping tabs on me all through high school?”
“Everyone was keeping tabs on you all through high school,” you confessed. “You were Jake Seresin, Hometown Hero. You still are. You could probably get away with murder.”
He huffed a laugh, shaking his head. If you weren't mistaken, there was a tinge of pink in his cheeks, but it might have been the beer he finished, or a play of the light. “Actually, I can’t. Semper Fortis, remember? You can't fly planes in prison. Besides, I am way too pretty for that uniform.”
“And you always do that,” you replied. “Try to throw people off the scent of you being an actually decent guy. But I know the truth,” you pointed out. “You have a tell.”
“Really, what's that?”
Over the course of the conversation Jake had angled towards you without your notice; now, your knees were touching and his upturned mouth was close enough to kiss. Your heart was racing in your chest, and yet his gaze was like a challenge - don’t back down, he seemed to say, and that was all Jake. He was exhilarating, just by being himself.
You dared to draw even closer, as if whispering a secret. “Mothers love you.”
“Maybe I’m just really good at pretending.”
“Take the hit, Seresin. No one is that good.”
Smiling, he nudged your knee and leaned back on his hands, sitting with you until the first early-nighters began to leave.
-
Amanda Seresin was two years older than Jake. Her dad, Jake’s uncle, passed away when Amanda was fourteen, and ever since, Jake and his parents had taken her and Dinah under their wings. Jake was the closest thing she had to a brother, and though he was younger, you knew Jake was incredibly protective of her and his aunt, so you were determined not to ruin his wedding experience by being a lovestruck weirdo.
After your time together on the porch, that might prove difficult for you. But this was about Amanda. She assigned you to be his date, and you were going to be a professional about it.
Literally. You were handling the flowers, after all.
“These are a little tall, aren’t they?” your mom asked, fretting over the tulips at the center of one of the guest tables. “I asked for measurements, but now that they’re here
”
You glanced at your watch. “We have time to fix them.”
“All of them?”
“Yes, mom, all of them. Let’s take them into the kitchen, then we can rush up and change before the cocktails start.” You knew she wouldn’t have a speck of peace if she didn’t get them trimmed. She would fret and fuss, and probably commit floral kidnapping crimes when it all got too much. She liked everything to be perfect, especially for the people she loved, so you ignored the time crunch and your watch yelling at you that it was 4:35, twenty-five minutes before guests were due to arrive for drinks and canapĂ©s, and, signaling for your dad to help gather up the centerpieces, you rushed into the venue’s kitchen and started trimming down with the nearest pair of garden shears.
Your mom breathed a sigh of relief when the task was done and a few of the earliest guests offered to help carry the vases back to the tables, giving you enough time to head upstairs and put on the blue dress you’d brought in a garment bag.
So you were fussing about your looks
 That didn’t mean you were not chill, it just meant you wanted to look nice
 for Amanda. For the photos. It had nothing to do with Jake Seresin at all.
By the time you made it down - finally, and a little late since you spent more on it than usual perfecting your makeup - there were about sixty people on the lawn, nibbling on pulled pork sliders and mac-and-cheese bites, mini tacos and bacon-wrapped dates. You spotted your dad grabbing one of everything and your mom pulling on his sleeve, probably to hiss, “Pace yourself, hon.” She had a glass of champagne in one hand, more as a prop, since half of her attention was spent surveying her work as if anticipating one of the centerpieces to go up in flames.
Knowing her, she might have packed a tiny fire extinguisher in that glittery, silver clutch.
You stifled a laugh, grabbing a plate and a few of the canapĂ©s from a passing waiter. The rehearsal dinner was a much bigger affair than the barbecue Jake’s parents had thrown for close friends and family the night before. You knew Josh would be in attendance (probably with Mia) and so would a lot of your high school crowd. Letting out a sigh, you threw your shoulders back and tried to look relaxed, exchanging greetings as you mingled with the growing number of guests. It was a beautiful night. God must love Amanda, as He should, because the weather was balmy in a pleasant way, warm enough that the ladies could throw off their wraps and show off their dresses, the men leave their jackets draped over chairs.
The venue was a little bed and breakfast with a sprawling back patio and hedges that grew around the property, gracefully unkempt, with magnolia trees in bloom. You said hello to your old History teacher, a small, soft-spoken woman with a gray bob and tortoiseshell glasses dangling on a chain. In turn, she had taken personal interest in Amanda, Jake, and then you - she was the whole reason Amanda went into teaching, and you heard Jake mention once that he wouldn’t have joined the Navy if not for her. Sometimes, you felt a little self-conscious about not having more to show for your education, but Ms. Beauchene never made you feel like your life choices were a disappointment. She popped into the flower shop on occasion, pleased with her paper-wrapped bouquets, and no matter what, without fail, you’d ring her up and she’d say with full honesty, “These are going to make my week,” before she walked out humming.
You were glad Amanda included her in the rehearsal, especially when you spotted Josh walking in with his arm around Mia’s waist. Excusing yourself, you made for the bar and ordered one of the signature cocktails, Amanda’s favorite blackberry bourbon smash, and downed half of it before turning back and making small talk as if your life depended on it. Strangely enough, it wasn’t the sight of Josh that had you feeling like the inside of your brain was crawling with ants. It was Mia. You hated the thought of her seeing any kind of weakness in you - that she might take in your appearance and think that your hairdo was messy or that your eyes looked a little dark, and assume from it that she’d left you a human wreck after her little victory.
Without a doubt, Mia had attended the Fiona Brussaurd School of Mean Girls, and the last thing you wanted to do was appear like the lesser creature. So when your family began to fuss under the pretense of “casually” making conversation, you swatted them away, feeling grateful when dinner was announced and everyone could retreat to their neutral corners.
You chose to sit at a table with a few old school friends, one of whom was also in the wedding party, and to avoid the meaningful looks Julie had been sending you all evening, you sat with your back to the rest of the guests, enjoying the hour of relative peace and reminiscing, the view of an ornamental fountain set with warm lights, and your plate of pan-seared sea bass and cheesy potatoes. Gradually, the music shifted from sit-down easy listening to dancing tunes, and the people at your table began seeking out partners or joining those already on the lawn who were spinning and jiving in every available space.
Soon, you were alone at the table. You leaned back in your chair, enjoying the breeze against your face. If you closed your eyes, listening to the sounds of music and laughter, you could almost forget all the drama with your ex

You felt a tap on your shoulder. Looking up, you saw Jake and his movie-star grin. The butterflies started banging around your stomach again. Forget the tulips, you were the one with your nerves all in a tangle tonight.
“Hey, stranger - ’nother drink?” he asked, offering you another of the bourbon cocktails. He had a rocks glass in his other hand, and without waiting for an invitation he took the chair next to you, throwing his arm across the back of yours.
You replied, “Yes, please,” trying not to melt into his touch. Nuzzling against him like a cat would not be chill, you reminded yourself, even if he did look incredible with his open dress shirt collar and the little peek of his chest made you feel like a Victorian with the vapors.
He lounged in that casual way of his, attractive without trying. “These things really go on forever, don't they?”
“And it’s just the rehearsal dinner.”
“What happened to getting married on a Tuesday while everyone’s at work?”
You narrowed your eyes. “Did you just quote Runaway Bride?”
His face went still. “What, no.”
“Yes, you did!” you exclaimed, setting down your drink and straightening in your seat. Jake looked mildly panicked and was doing his best to look innocent, which you found absolutely hilarious. “Oh my God, are you a closet romcom man?”
“It must've been subconscious.”
“Subconscious, my ass,” you shot back.
“She looks happy.” Jake tipped his head towards Amanda despite the fact that she was behind you both, out of sight, and clearly being used as a way to change the subject. “You know the guy?”
“You met him yesterday,” you said. And I know what you're doing implicit was in your tone.
Jake shrugged, an expert at deflection. “Yeah, but it's hard to tell what a guy’s made of from a single meeting.”
Deciding that the accusation of Romcomitis would go unanswered on this particular occasion, you tested the limits of his cool under pressure, pretending to deliberate before you played along with the conversational shift.
“D’you want to hear the absolute worst thing I can think to say about him?”
Jake went battle-ready, poised to hate the guy. You watched his shoulders and the set of his jaw change, and it made you want to touch the side of his face and kiss the frown away, laughing as you did.
Just messing with you, you would say.
It would be so easy. Maybe the fantasy was clouding your judgment - along with your third cocktail of the night - but you could feel in your body that being with Jake would be as natural as breathing.
You looked over your shoulder, watching Christian lean into Amanda to whisper something into her ear.
He had his hand on her arm and looked a little spooked, probably because one of the Seresins’ honorary aunts, Jackie, who was known for her tell-it-like-it-is comments, no matter how indiscreet, was walking away. Poor guy. Amanda giggled at whatever he said and stroked his hand, whispering back words of reassurance. Their demeanor together was easy, full of shorthand. And Amanda did look happy - so happy that it made you a little jealous, pleased as you were that she had found her person.
Jake followed your gaze, watching them alongside you.
“He's a little dull,” you explained. “But in a good way. He mellows her out.”
“Amanda? That sounds like an impossible task. But I can see it
” He cocked his head. “I think.”
You turned your eyes back to your own table. Jake was fiddling with his glass, watching the amber liquid swirling around the oversized iced cube. He looked pensive, a furrow appearing between his brows that, in another life, you would have stroked away.
He shook his head and raised the glass to his lips. “You don't realize how much you've missed
”
Before you could think about it, you had your hand on his arm. “Hey, no one's keeping score.”
“Maybe I am.”
“Then don't,” you insisted. “You do what you've gotta do - we all know that. Your parents know it, Amanda knows it. She’s just happy you're here.”
You could tell that, as much as he appreciated your words, they weren't enough to sweep away all the moments he hadn't been around to see. It didn't matter that Jake loved flying planes, that he was proud to be one of the best naval aviators in the service, and wouldn't change his career for the world. He was still in a position where he had to ask you what Amanda’s future husband was like. He had missed his goddaughter’s christening, had to rush out of Mike and Julie’s wedding five years ago
 He’d made an oath, and for as long as he wore the uniform, his first commitment was to something other than his family. Other than himself.
He spoke his next words quietly, almost to himself, just for you.
“You know, the thing about flying is that when you're up there, nothing else matters. It can’t. All of your focus, all of your faculties, your energy
 they're in the air. Meanwhile, all of this real life
 the thing we’re meant to be safeguarding for everyone else, it doesn't stop, and when you land right back in the middle of it—”
He stopped.
“Yeah?” You were hanging on for the rest of it, eager for these little pieces of Jake that you stored up even after he was gone.
“I mean, it feels like yesterday since I left for college, signed up. Now Amanda’s getting married, Mike’s having kids, you are having just the worst luck of the year
”
“Hey!” you laughed.
“I’m kidding, kidding!”
“You’re sounding like an old man, Jake. You're thirty-two - pull yourself together. Jeez! Who knew Top Gun would make you so existential? Is that why you're self-medicating with classic romantic comedies?”
“If you ever tell Mike, I swear to God—” He pointed his finger at you, and you pinched it in two of yours, earning a chuckle and a childish attempt at a thumb-war game that was interrupted when the bride herself came up behind you and threw her arms around you both with a “Hey, you two!”
“Mands!” Jake exclaimed, craning his neck to give her a kiss on the cheek.
“Having fun?”
“Absolutely. So, so much—”
“You big fibber,” Amanda threw back. “Why are you here? Go dance!”
“Can’t. I’m keeping my date company, and a gentleman never abandons his date. It’s in the rules.”
“Good thing I know you're not a gentleman. You're in my wedding party!” she said. “It’s up to you two to set a good example for the other guests.”
“Yes, ma’am. Shall we?” He offered you his hand, throwing Amanda a look that said, See? I’m following orders.
She smiled back, giving you room to rise from your chairs and circle round. With her arms crossed, she watched as you found an open space, making sure you’d followed through before seeking out her next victims.
As bad luck would have it, the song switched from something uptempo to an Ashley Monroe ballad, romantic strings and all. “Has anybody ever told you/ that when you walk into a dark room/ the light of a thousand moons surround you?/ Yeah, there's just something about you./ Has anybody ever told you?”
It was stupid, but the words felt so real with Jake’s hands on you that you were worried he’d be able to read your mind or see on your face that you meant every sentence. You tried looking anywhere else, at the other couples, the catering staff picking up empty glasses, at your mom fluffing a perfectly decent bouquet, anywhere but at Jake.
“Why do you always do that?”
“Do what?” you asked, eyes darting nervously at being caught red-handed.
“Tense up like I’ve got the plague,” Jake said. “You’re making this weird.”
“I’m making what weird?”
“We’re dancing!” He pressed one hand against your hip, the other into your lower back. “Just dance!”
“By which I’m sure you mean, ‘just follow my lead’?”
You didn't mean to sound so prickly, you were just panicking and trying to throw Jake off the scent. This does not constitute playing it cool, you scolded yourself. But instead of taking it badly, Jake laughed as he stared down at you.
“If you like. Or I can follow yours if it makes you feel any better. Here, you can put your hand on my waist - but leave room for Jesus.”
“Dork.”
“There we go,” he cajoled, swaying with you in time to the beat. “Letting you insult me seems to really get your engines going. We should analyze that.”
“Don’t you ever stop talking?”
“I don’t know, do I?” He cackled out loud at the dark look you sent his way, stroking your back in a way that meant absolutely nothing, but which you felt all the way down to your toes. “You make it too easy,” he added.
Jake’s sense of humor made it hard to stay self-conscious. Eventually, you eased into the dance and you were almost sorry when the song switched to something a little more upbeat that didn't require him to stand so close to you. Still, he twirled you in a circle and brought you back into the solid curve of his body, showing off.
Then, out of nowhere, his face worked into a scowl as he spotted something a few yards to your right. You turned your head to see what it was, so lost in the moment that it took a few seconds for you to register that Josh was dancing with Mia, quite well, actually, to the Texas Tornados.
“Look at that schmuck.”
“Jake
” you warned.
“What? It’s just an observation, I’m not saying it for your benefit.”
“She looks incredible,” you sighed. On anyone else, the dress she had on would make them look like a costume disco ball, but on Mia it looked modern and chic, showing off her body and matching well with a slicked back bun and dangly earrings.
Jake’s shoulder rose and fell beneath your hand. “If you say so. She’s not really my type.”
Are you serious?  “Jake, just about every woman is your type.”
“I’m sorry, are you slut-shaming me right now? In this political climate? I could have you canceled for that.”
“Ha-ha,” you said in response. “I mean, look at her, she is objectively a 10 - don’t say you wouldn’t. Hell, I would if I were inclined that way
 Don’t!” You pinned Jake with a warning stare, cutting off the joke that was on the tip of his tongue and dying to come out.
“Well, I wouldn’t now,” he said instead.
“Gee, thanks.”
“For the sake of our friendship.”
The word made you tense up again - not on purpose, it was an automatic reaction you wanted to take back as soon as you went stiff all over again. And it didn't escape Jake’s notice.
“What?” he questioned, cupping your shoulders and shaking you a little as a gag. “Oh my God, have you ever thought about taking up yoga? Meditation?”
“Flying lessons?” you shot back.
“Hey, don’t knock it. Compared to you, I am a very chilled-out person.” You rolled your eyes, not wanting to admit that he was right. No matter what was going on inside Jake, he knew how to keep a calm exterior. You’d always admired that about him. With the exception of your dad, your family wasn't known for its cool under pressure. Even Mike could be a bit of a basket case. That’s why he and Julie worked so well together.
You sighed again, wondering if you’d ever find your own version of Christian or Julie, someone who fit with all of your wonky parts and made you feel, regardless of circumstance, that everything would turn out okay.
“You look beautiful, by the way.” You looked at Jake, startled by the remark and the heat rushing into your face. He was dead serious. The levity you saw in his eyes had nothing to do with his tone, which was kind but not pitying. And you knew Jake would never say something like that if he didn’t mean it. “Not that it’s a competition,” he tacked on, “I’m just saying
 don’t sell yourself short. I’m sure he’s eating his heart out right now.”
“And how would you know a thing like that?”
“Because he hasn’t stopped looking at us for the last sixty seconds.”
Your gaze drifted off to the side before Jake took your chin in his hand, his touch gentle and yet firm.
“Don’t look!” he chided. “Jesus
 That’s recon 101 - I’ve got your six, you keep dancing and pretend we’re not talking about him, you amateur!”
“Sorry! You’re so bossy!” you grumbled, fighting off another blush.
“Sweetheart, you have no idea.”
The word zinged through your body along with the killer Jake Seresin dimpled grin, and to make matters worse, he twirled you again, laughing when he brought you to rest your back against his chest. Josh froze when he saw you, spotting Jake’s hands on your waist. But you couldn’t care less - you were breathless, with Jake’s mouth close enough to kiss, reminding you of his knee nudge on the porch and his arm beneath your hand.
For a moment, you could almost believe that he was flirting with you for real. If you turned your head, would he accept the press of your mouth against his? Would he push you away or pull you in closer, regardless of your families watching and Josh staring, almost open-mouthed, like he couldn’t believe Jake fucking Seresin would give you the time of day?
Before you could make a choice, the song ended and Jake released you from his grip, keeping a hand on your back as he herded you away from the dance floor and to the bar, where he ordered a beer and asked if you wanted something. If you answered, you weren’t aware. You felt not in control, your stomach all in knots and the memory of Jake’s touch seared into your skin. A part of you still wanted desperately to kiss him and the other wanted to rush into the B&B and burst into tears from sheer confusion. Meanwhile, Jake seemed perfectly fine, chatting with the bartender on duty and leaning against the counter as he dropped a few bills into the tip jar.
“What are you doing?” you asked when you felt him touching you on the shoulder.
“Pretending you have lint on your dress.”
“Hey! On the dance floor was one thing, but I am not aiming to make this entire weekend about making my ex jealous. Any high school dude-vendetta you have against Josh should be addressed on your own time, you psycho. Besides, he’s never going to actually buy it.”
“Alright.” Jake threw up his hands, lowering the charm down a few watts. Your drinks were set down on a pair of square cocktail napkins and you took up yours, a fizzy gin thing with lemon that made you wonder whether you shouldn’t have stuck with bourbon to avoid going around with a hangover on Amanda’s wedding day.
Jake went on. “But I’m really not liking all this negative self-talk, you know. Mia might be a 10, but at most he’s, like, a 6
”
“Oh, be quiet!”
“You’re an 8.”
“What?” The alcohol either rushed up to your head or evaporated completely. How the hell did Jake manage to say things that left you completely dumbfounded and without a single intelligent thought in your head? And he did it with a smile! This one was purposefully subdued as he waved around with the beer in his hand as if making a profound point.
“You’re way out of his league. Don’t tell me you hadn’t noticed?”
“Okay, well
”
“You’re blushing!” he remarked. “That’s adorable.”
“You’re not funny, Seresin.”
“Hey, I joke about a lot of things, but I don’t go around handing 8s to just anyone.”
“Oh, look, they’re bringing out coffee.” The needle was tipping firmly towards the need to escape, though it wasn’t that serious - you knew it wasn’t; Jake had a tendency to be a flirt and he usually didn’t mean anything by it. Sometimes, it could even be amusing to play along, to get swept up in his wit and the light of his attention. But you didn’t want to play. And you didn’t want to seem ungrateful for his company because you weren’t. You loved every precious second you got to spend with him, knowing he’d be off to California soon and that the next time you might see him could be months or even a year from now.
Getting your hopes up would be a mistake, and you were dangerously close to doing it.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” He touched your elbow gently. You wished he couldn’t read you so well. Or that he could read you better, and see what you had been trying to say to him for years but were too scared to utter.
You did your best to smile. “Nothing’s wrong. You don’t have to hover all night. Go, take a load off, have fun.”
“I am having fun,” he said, frowning. “Aren’t you?”
“I was. I am,” you corrected, frustrated with yourself for not taking it better. For not being cool and together and the sort of girl who took charge and damned the outcome. She would’ve kissed Jake when she had the chance. She would have shown up to California. Hell, she would’ve made her move ages ago instead of pining, pathetically, and letting twenty years go by.
That’s what Mia had done. And that’s why she had her dream guy - your former guy - while you were exactly in the same position, too tongue-tied to take a shot.
“Just
 can you give me some space?” you blurted out, your frustration bleeding through.
The hurt in Jake’s expression was there and gone in a lightning flash, but you’d seen it and you felt terrible about it. Before you could say anything to make it better, he’d replaced it with a devil-may-care smile.
“Got it,” he said, his voice a little tight around the edges. “Well
 I’ll make myself scarce. Holler if you need me.”
With that, he took his beer and disappeared into the crowd, leaving you to weave your way through oblivious partygoers to find the nearest ladies’ room, where you locked yourself in a stall and tried not to ruin your makeup with the tears threatening to spill down your cheeks.
-
Hindsight was a bitch. The next morning you were sure you’d overreacted, made a fool of yourself and created a potentially awkward situation now that the wedding day was upon you and you had to take his arm, in - you glanced at the digital clock on your nightstand - five-and-a-half hours, and walk with him down the aisle wearing a smile for the sake of the photographers.
You groaned, covering your face with your hands and calling yourself every name in the book.
Jake had promised to be your wedding buddy and then sweetly kept his word, and what did you do in response? Completely freak out, you scatterbrained nincompoop.
As penance, you threw yourself into the arrangement of the reception flowers, channeling your mother while you directed the staff this way and that, trying not to think about Jake and the mortifying apology that awaited you. It was the right thing to do - not only to clear the air but because he hadn't deserved being chewed out in a momentary panic, and you knew you wouldn't feel right with yourself if you didn't take the blame and say your mea culpa.
But boy were you dreading it.
“You should head out now, Cabbage,” your mom advised around eleven o'clock. “Dad and I can handle the rest and you should be with Amanda, spend some time with the girls before the big event.”
“Are you sure you don't need help with the aisle arrangements?” A cowardly attempt, but you did it anyway.
“We’ve got it,” Mom repeated, turning you around and all but shepherding you into the parking lot. She waved you off with a “have fun,” and you couldn't help your brain’s internal response of “fat chance.”
All the way to the B&B you kept rehearsing what you might say to Jake when you saw him, but by the time you pulled up and found a free parking space, you were sweating, physically and metaphorically, and thinking that, maybe, if you listened to TED Talks rather than Dateline, you might have an enlightened response to your current dilemma.
You fetched your bagged bridesmaid's dress from the trunk of the car, along with your makeup bag and hair tools. You’d have to use the shower before you started getting ready, but you were looking forward to get-ready champagne and a throwback playlist. Anything to feel more like your normal self and less like a silly teenager who couldn’t talk to boys.
You went up three flights of stairs to reach the bridal suite. From both sides, you could hear music spilling out into the hall, an ABBA classic clashing with Brett Young. Automatically, you placed your hand on the doorknob leading towards bouncy 80s pop only for it to turn and spring open, revealing Jake with an undone bow tie hanging around his neck.
It could be that your mouth sprung open, not expecting to see him that abruptly and without giving yourself your planned thirty-second pep talk.
Your mind went blank. All you could do was stare at him like an idiot as he pointed across the hall and said, “Bridal suite’s that way.”
“Yeah, it was
”
“The Super Trouper? Groom’s choice.”
“Are you sure it wasn't yours?” The joke spilled out of your mouth, landing awkwardly to your own ears. But Jake smiled anyway, glancing down as he let the door close behind him. 
He rubbed the side of his freshly shaved cheek. “I’m headed down to the front desk, by the way. I swear I’m not stalking you.”
You deserved that. So instead of cringing down into the floor - which was what you really wanted to do - you took the hit and said, “I didn’t think you were.”
“About last night
”
“I’m sorry for flying off the handle. I’m just
 a little stressed,” you cut him off. It was an understatement, and not totally honest, but it was the best you could do without getting into the embarrassing particulars.
From the groomsmen’s side, Britney Spears followed ABBA, singing, “Oops, I did it again,” which seemed perversely apropos and just another reminder that you were a puppet of fate. Presently, you had to be paying for God knows what sin - probably calling Mike a buttface all those years before.
“Hey, I get it. I wasn’t trying to be clingy,” Jake went on.
“You’re not! You’re a good friend
 Thank you.”
It pained you to say it, but you figured now was as good a time as any to face facts: you only had a few more days together, and you didn't want to spend them all wasting what you had, wishing it would turn into something else. Friendship with Jake was good enough. He was kind and loyal and honest; hell, anyone would be lucky to have him in their corner.
Maybe what you needed was a little gratitude. It was a wedding day, after all. Your friends and family would all be gathering in a few hours to celebrate Christian and Amanda and they had chosen you to be a special part of their most important day. How cool was that?
“Can we just not talk about Mia and Josh today?” you asked, hefting the garment back up your shoulder. “I want to focus on Amanda and make sure she has a nice time at her wedding - get drunk but not sloppily so, take a few pictures, dance a bit, not feel like everyone’s waiting for the Jerry Springer shoe to drop?”
“We can do that,” Jake replied.
“Okay. Thanks.”
“See you on the other side?”
“You bet.”
He went down the hall, turning right and bounding the carpeted stairs. You watched him go with a sigh, deciding that it was hard to be a grown-up and lovelorn at the same time. The two things were so incompatible - liking someone, loving them even, felt utterly undignified.
Nonetheless, you could breathe a lot easier after clearing the air. With the apology out of the way, you threw yourself into full bridesmaid mode, squeezing into the cramped bathroom with five other women in customized robes who were curling, straightening, powdering, talking, fighting for counter space, gasping at gossip, and being an overall flurry of chaos while the bride reigned over all, putting in comments through the haze of hair- and setting spray.
The air in the room was joyous, with a smattering of nervous energy mostly provided by Amanda.
Once dressed in your different styles of champagne satin, the bridesmaids focused on making sure Amanda was ready for her starring role. You took turns doing up the buttons on the back of her wedding gown, and when Dinah popped in to give her a pair of diamond earrings she wore to her own wedding, there wasn't a dry eye in the room. “Do not let my mascara run!” Amanda urged, prompting Carrie, the maid of honor, to jokingly rush forward with a folded-up Kleenex and dab at her eyes.
The groomsmen left for the wedding venue first, piling into a shuttle after yelling well-wishes through the door. Fifteen minutes later you followed suit, with Ali O’Rourke pouring canned cocktails into plastic cups and filming the journey at the same time as her phone blasted Taylor Swift (“But none of the breakup songs!”). In twenty minutes you were at the botanical garden, arranging the first look through a comical series of shouts and mimes partially obscured by a tall bush and caught on camera by the couple’s videographer. Once Christian had gotten the memo to stand there, at the edge of an ornamental pond but with his back to the azaleas, you pushed Amanda in his direction and waved her on, giving whistles and catcalls when he dipped her into a kiss that was very un-Christian-like and all the more romantic for that reason.
Once the wedding party photos were done, it was time to head inside and wait for the guests to arrive. You found that, like Amanda, you were feeling a little jittery now that patience was all that was required. From the double doors to the altar, it was a fairly long walk and you were worried that your heels would sink into the grass or that you would fall flat on your face. Luckily, you weren’t the only one with that fear. Amanda’s coworker, Lucy, who had never been a bridesmaid before, had a minor freakout, and talking her down helped you allay your own fears, as did the liquid courage courtesy of Ali’s dress having pockets.
(Amanda: “I don’t remember reading that on the website.”
Ali: “That’s because you didn’t. I had it tailored.”)
At last, the wedding coordinator called for everyone to take their places and Jake came towards you, looking smart in his tux. At the rehearsal dinner you’d heard Mike asking, “So, where’s the dress uniform?”, to which Jake replied, “And upstage you?” Well, uniform or not, you were sure he could upstage anyone. To you, he was the handsomest person in the room, and you were in danger of saying so until Jake beat you to the punch.
“Look at you, you clean up well!” he remarked.
“And you look terrible.”
“Now I know that’s a bald-faced lie.”
You laughed. Humble as always. You were glad to see that all the awkwardness between you had gone, in no small part because of the excitement over the ceremony. A sudden hush came over everyone as Harriet signaled for the doors to be opened. Jake held out his arm. “Shall we?” he said, echoing his words when he asked you to dance.
This time you were ready for it. No matter what, in this particular moment, you and Jake were allies - wedding buddies, he said - and instead of overthinking things or making a mountain out of a molehill, you were resolved to enjoy it.
You took his arm and faced forward. The first strains of music began. Showtime, Harriet mouthed, while at the altar Christian turned to meet his bride.
-
The ceremony was over in the blink of an eye, followed by a drinks reception and a sit-down dinner punctuated by toasts that ranged from the humorous to the downright sentimental. Now that Amanda had clipped up her train, she seemed more relaxed than she had been in the morning, and it made you feel like you could let down your hair, so to speak, and enjoy the party underneath the light-strewn tent.
The guests were eager to dance. Without letup they moved through classic wedding standards and modern dance hits to country reels and the obligatory playing of “Mr. Brightside,” a moment which Sandy and Clyde stole with their enthusiastic head-bops. You couldn't remember the last time you danced, or laughed, half as much, and even the appearance of Josh and Mia couldn’t steal your good mood. As long as they kept to their side of the tent, you could pretend they weren't there and if Mom or Julie sidled up with a comment in defense of your honor, it was easy to point a finger to your ear as if to say, “What? I can’t hear you, the music’s too loud!”
Jake kept close for the most of the night, leaning in close and making funny comments about the hidden goings-on - who was putting the moves on who, who was sneaking mini cupcakes into their purse, who got carted off to the indoor area after over-imbibing and nearly causing a minor dancefloor traffic incident.
Maybe it was all his Navy training, but for a guy’s guy Jake had an uncanny eye for gossip, and you said so, winning a laugh and another request for your oath of secrecy.
“I hate to tap out before Great-Aunt Sandy,” he said halfway through the Jailhouse Rock, “but do you want to take a breather? I feel like I’m getting a stitch in my side.”
“You? Sheesh, Hangman, you're really letting yourself go,” you chaffed. “What'll the higher-ups think when you get back to San Diego?”
“Well, if they really want to replace me, I’ll send them Aunt Sandy’s way.” He led you outside, where you promptly balanced one foot at a time trying to unclasp your heeled sandals while Jake watched, snorting before he took pity on you and let you lean on his arm.
His very muscled arm

Inwardly, you sighed like one of the Bimbettes from Beauty and the Beast, but hey, you’d behaved yourself all day; you were allowed to have the occasional impure thought.
With a little sound of triumph, you managed to remove your shoes and held them by the straps, walking on the grass in your bare feet. You had a pair of flats in your purse, but that was somewhere inside and, anyway, the ground felt good against your tired arches. You’d been dancing for over two hours and needed the break.
“How do you even stand in those death traps?” Jake eyed your shoes as if they were hand grenades, which amused you to no end seeing as they’d cost you a small fortune precisely because they claimed to be comfortable.
“They’re not so bad,” you replied. “Besides, I wouldn’t need them if you weren’t so tall.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment.”
You shrugged, keeping your face deliberately blank. “It’s a free country.”
“Wow
” Jake huffed through a laugh, “you are incapable of just being nice to me.”
“What, I am nice!”
“In a backhanded-compliment sort of way, sure.”
“What do you want me to say? ‘Jake, you’re the biggest 10 at the wedding’?”
“Oh, I don’t know, but we’re getting warmer,” he said with a toothy grin, entering a path bordered by low hedges leading to the pond where the first look had taken place.
The lights from the wedding reception lit the way, along with the small solar-powered fixtures planted in the ground, but for the most part the darkness was a respite from the sights and sounds of the packed tent. In a way, it made it easier to talk to Jake, ignoring your history, feeling like a girl who’d been asked on a walk by someone who wanted to spend more time with her.
You laughed, leaning into the role of interested flatterer. You were walking backwards, even daring to place your hand on the front of Jake’s shirt, trusting him to lead the way and keep you from tripping into a bush. “You’re an incredible dancer,” you put in, going full Bimbette. You might have batted your eyelashes, and your voice took on the dreamy girlishness of Marilyn Monroe, which only gave Jake the giggles as he tried to maintain his yes, I am all the things composure. “You look as good in a tux as you do in your Navy uniform.”
“Both true.”
“You’re funny and smart, and soooo interesting.”
“Don’t I know it.”
You gasped, stopping in your tracks to place your hands on his cheeks. Jake was smiling from ear to ear, struggling to keep his lips pressed together. “You’ve got a face like an Old Hollywood dreamboat.”
He nodded solemnly, the slight clearing of his throat the only indicator that he was on the verge of breaking character. “You’re not the first person to say that, actually.”
“Oh, really?”
“Mm, does that surprise you? Do you disagree?”
“Of course not, this is the Jake Seresin Appreciation Hour.” You draped your arms around his neck. Maybe it was the cocktails or the distant wedding music making you bold, but Jake didn't pull away and you were only pretending - at least, that was your justification when you felt the weight of his hands on your hips.
“Go on, then.”
“Your eyes are green.”
“Now you’re just stating facts.”
“Fine, but you’re being a very picky subject!”
“I’ll have you know,” he scoffed, “Jake Seresin Hour was not my idea. You don’t get to institute it and then complain when I point out your lazy reporting.”
Lazy reporting? You were ready to duke it out over that and he knew it, his eyes alight with the challenge, head cocked to see what you’d come up with next. Your back hit the trunk of a live oak and you felt the adrenaline in your veins mixing with the alcohol and a sheer attraction that wouldn't be kept at bay. You wondered briefly whether this was what flying was like - a full-bodied, present physicality, all instinct, every move stretched taut and your nerves like live wires.
Jake glanced at your mouth and it left you breathless. Little wonder, then, that the next words out of your mouth were half confession, half part of the game.
“There’s not a single person at this party who isn’t head-over-heels in love with you.”
“Not a single one?” Jake argued. “Not even the groom?”
“Not even the groom.”
“Well, obviously, we’re not including my relatives in that.”
“But everyone else
” you trailed off.
“Everyone else. Including you?”
“Especially me.”
It’s just a game, it’s just a game. The thought kept clashing in your head with the urge to say “kiss me” and he was standing so close, with his body half pressed against yours, solid and warm, realer than any lust-fueled fantasy you could’ve come up with in the dead of night, the party forgotten with him as your only view, and you kept thinking, Maybe he wants me to. Maybe it wouldn't matter. Maybe I should do it - what would be the harm?
The answer to this final point was obvious, and yet he was hard to resist. His fingers brushed against your waist, the touch feather-light enough that it might have been in your imagination except for his forehead pressed down to yours, his heart beating steadily beneath your nervous hand.
Without debating it further you pulled him into a kiss, shutting your eyes against any possible consequences as you memorized the taste of his mouth, the weight of his hands sliding down your back, the heat of his breath. You pulled away, mortified by your lapse in judgment and the obvious proof of feelings which you now couldn't take back.
There was no undoing this, but still you tried.
“Oh, I’m sorry
 I’m
 I’m drunk
 I shouldn’t have—”
“It’s fine.”
“No, I’m
 I’m gonna go.” You slid past him, holding your breath, willing him not to follow after you or try to stop you from fleeing. Your body felt like it was short-circuiting, blazing with need and then doused in icy-cold regret and horror at your own actions.
So he had flirted with you. That didn't mean he wanted to kiss you; it certainly didn't signal any romantic interest that merited you throwing yourself at him and telling him, of all things, that you loved him!
You went back to the party, picking your purse up from behind your chair and forcing a smile when people stopped you to chat, making excuses and saying you had to go to the bathroom. Inside, you moved past the lobby and straight out to the drive, where the hired shuttle service was taking guests in no state to drive to and from a few local hotels.
The driver asked if you were ready to leave and you said yes, feeling mildly guilty for staging an Irish goodbye, but there was no way you could go on pretending for the rest of the night, let alone face Jake. You prayed that everyone would be too busy having fun to notice your absence, and if not you would apologize profusely tomorrow at brunch, claiming a headache or exhaustion or anything else that might obscure your bad decision-making and propensity to lose your shit around Jake.
You were let onto the bus, the sole passenger as the driver turned on the engine and radioed his boss to say he was en route to the B&B. Just as you were relaxing into your seat, Jake came bounding up the steps, giving the driver a cursory nod just before the doors closed behind him and the vehicle began to move.
“Can we talk?” he asked, sliding next to you and dropping his jacket in his lap.
“There are, like, fifty open seats.”
“But you’re sitting in this one,” he said with the ghost of a grin. You would've rolled your eyes if you weren’t busy wishing you could teleport to literally anywhere else.
You faced forward to the other cars on the road, watching their taillights shine as you moved into nighttime traffic. “Can you do me a favor? I know you’ve done a lot of them over the past couple of days, but can you just forget that ever happened?”
“No.”
Aghast, you turned your head to see Jake looking maddeningly smug, not to mention relaxed, while he was invading your personal space and driving you to the brink of mental collapse.
“Why not?” you demanded.
“Why not? Because I don’t want to.”
“And is what I want—”
“Completely irrelevant,” he finished for you. “Besides, you kissed me, remember?”
“I don’t. I’ve wiped it from my memory chip.”
With a smile, Jake leaned forward and pressed a kiss to your lips that was almost chaste, except for the brush of his tongue against your lip and his fingers cupping your chin in a hold that was teasing and gentle, and undeniably thought-out.
“How about that one?” he asked, pulling away just enough to view your reaction.
“How about what?”
He grinned. “Cabbage.”
“Ew! Why would you call me that right now?” you exclaimed, scooching back into the window.
“Because you’re adorable. Beautiful.”
“Like a leafy green?”
“Yeah, like a whole salad.”
You laughed. “That makes no sense.”
“It really doesn’t.” But it did. Like so many other inside jokes, you knew exactly what he meant to say. It made you feel all warm inside, especially because there was no trace of subterfuge in his handsome face, and you knew he’d never be cruel enough to lead you on. He followed you, he thought you were beautiful, and he was here trying to convince you not to take the kiss back.
To be bold. To follow through.
“If you want to keep being friends
” he began.
“You and Mike are just friends, Jake. I’m the kid sister with a massively pathetic crush on you.”
“Maybe I have a crush on you too,” he said, looking you straight in the eyes. “Is that so hard to believe?”
“A little
 A lot, actually.”
“It shouldn’t be.”
In front of Pleasant View the driver pulled on the brakes, and Jake laced his fingers through yours as he dismounted and put a twenty in the tip jar, stopping in front of the entrance to face you with a question hanging, unspoken, in the air. If you let this opportunity pass you by, he would let you do it without a word, taking the gentleman’s way out and stopping his pursuit under the assumption that you had no interest in being with him, or in seeing where this new thing between you might go. But if you said yes

The possibilities flashed through your mind, as frightening as they were wonderful. Everything might change. Everything would, there was no doubt about that. But change wasn’t always a bad thing, and if you had someone holding your hand along the way?
Wasn’t that what love was all about?
“You’re thinking very loudly,” Jake pointed out.
“Is that an issue?”
“Why, is it an issue for you?”
You shook your head, trying to contain the nervous joy in your chest. “Maybe you should take me flying sometime, teach me the ways of classic Hangman chill.”
“Just name the time and place,” he promised. “I’m ready when you are.”
Instead of second guessing, you took him at his word.
You reached up and kissed him fully on the mouth, sighing when he pressed you flush against his chest and carressed the nape of your neck. There was no predicting the future; that part would always be like navigating blind. But Jake was worth the risk. If nothing else, he was the sort of man who made you want to try, who took chances, and made you laugh through the terror of uncertainty.
In that moment, being lifted off the ground, physically swept off your feet by the man you’d loved since you’d first contemplated what love could be, you felt like the luckiest girl in the world. And the best part? From the look on Jake’s face, you knew the exact thought running through his head:
Babe, the luck is all mine.
Man, you loved weddings.
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potofsoup · 6 months ago
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i love your fourth of july comics every year but this years feels extremely optimistic about biden’s abilities in the face of him letting roe get overturned and funding a gen*cide at worst or letting it happen at best by taking the bare minimum of regulatory action
 i mean can he really be trusted at all anymore to do the right thing or act in line with the people’s demands? and how do we know the people behind project 2025 won’t just rig the election again to get in under false pretenses?
Hihi! Thank you for reading and enjoying my July 4th comics every year! I am in a non-US airport en route to a month-long trip in a place with sketchy internet, so sorry in advance for sloppiness in my response (and potentially going radio silent).
But:
I don't think he "let" Roe get overturned, since that was the Supreme Court's overwhelming conservative majority, which really started with Mitch McConnell refusing to approve Obama's appointee and forcing it into a 2016 election issue. The fact that Trump got to appoint 3 Supreme Court Justices is what got us here.
Re: Biden and the Israel/Hamas war ... on the one hand, there's definitely more that he could have done, but on the other hand, they are a whole other country over there. It's Hamas that initiated the Oct 7 attacks and took the hostages. It's Netanyahu and his right-wing government who decided to retaliate to such extreme extent. Biden can talk about how he would really like Netanyahu to stop fighting and step down, but at the end of the day that's not his call, any more than he can stop the Sudan fighting that is near-genocidal either.
So, to come to your question #1: "Can he really be trusted at all anymore to do the right thing or act in line with the people’s demands"?
For me, it's a resounding YES. Guyz, he has passed so much good domestic policies. My spouse works in green energy and the passing of the Inflation Reduction Act halved his anxiety and gave him legitimate hope. The tumblr post I linked to in my comic has links to many of the other great things that Biden has done. Tbh I voted for him in 2020 because "a moldy onion is still better than Trump", and I've been pleasantly surprised. Like how he tried to cancel student loans, the Supreme Court overturned it, and then he came back 6 months later with a different way to do it that didn't lead to a court challenge.
Is he perfect? Hell no. There's tons of stuff that I wish he did more about, or he went further on, but also he's just one guy heading one branch of government who is heading into an election year. (Just like FDR promising not joining WWII, while behind the scenes doing all the Lend-Lease Act stuff). And "the people" have lots of demands, many of them conflicting.
I'd also like to push at the unspoken part of your question... "Can he really be trusted to do the right thing..." compared to whom? Because right now the answer is "compared to Trump." And compared to Trump... I don't even trust Trump to respect the results of a legitimate election. Heck, he might just take his favorite state secrets, sell them to the highest bidder (or just show them off to someone for funzies), and then claim Presidential immunity. A decent Democrat who got stuff done vs someone who probably wants to pardon himself and all his friends and do Project 2025 stuff is not even on the same level. (Do I wish that there was a viable Democratic alternative to Biden? Sure! But who?) Heck, at this point -- imagine if it's Kamala Harris vs. Trump. Who would you vote for?
As for your question #2: "How do we know the people behind project 2025 won’t just rig the election again to get in under false pretenses?"
We don't. But also what can we do besides showing up to vote?
Actually, I need bullet points for this:
The 2022 midterm elections brought in fewer-than-expected election-deniers into crucial electoral offices at the state level, which means that hopefully most state electoral boards will continue to have integrity
Yes, voting is harder but at least we can still vote. So it's about getting out there and getting your vote counted. For some states, it involves waiting in 8 hour lines. For some states, it involves bringing 2 forms of ID. Document. Track. Make sure it's dropped off in a real ballot box and not a fake one. Don't believe messaging that the voting is happening on a different day or location, etc.
A 50.1% majority is easily challenged. A 55% majority, less so. Which means getting people out to vote.
The more people know about and think about the reality of a second Trump term (versus being disappointed by a Biden term), the more they will be motivated to vote against Trump.
Finally, let's be real here: I'm braced for a 2nd Trump term. That said:
I'm still going to go and vote for Biden, because the only way to prevent a 2nd Trump term is to vote.
A Trump term where either the House or Senate is controlled by the Democrats will be *very* different from a clean Republican sweep.
Even with a clean Republican sweep on the federal level, States have so much more power now, and voting the state level stuff will help shore up Democratic goals for the future. States get to draw voting districts however they want. States get to decide on abortion policies. If you live in a deep Red state, there still might be things to vote for that make it easier to live in now, and turn it purple a few elections down the line.
So at the end of the day, it's "Vote AND". Vote and keep living your best life. Vote and tell others about Project 2025. Vote and have hope. Even if Trump wins, at least you'll have voted against him. Vote and stay to build up a progressive wave for the next election.
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suksatoru · 2 months ago
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002. CARNATIONS
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Touya wasn't fitting in very well.
There were a lot of things you noticed about him during his first week. He didn't talk much - he'd sit in silence a lot more than he should. It was bad. He was spending too much time with his own thoughts - and you were becoming afraid that he would end up swimming too far into his own mind where drowning would only be inevitable.
He didn't eat much either. Only when he absolutely needed to - and he'd take a few bites before stubbornly pushing his plate away. It was hard trying to get him to talk to you too, because he simply refused to cooperate.
There was this faraway look in his eyes. Like he couldn't believe what his life had come to. He had so many plans - so many things to do. They were all hopeless now. He had an entirely new checklist- and he couldn't even be bothered to pick it up. Was it bad that he had no will to live?
Touya didn't understand why his father wanted him alive. He hadn't seen him since the war, only hearing his name whispered amongst the doctors when they thought he was asleep. Touya truly didn't see the purpose of his family fighting so much for him - he was falling apart. Both mentally and physically, straining the doctors for no reason when he should just die. He'd done terrible things, and in his mind, he deserved death.
"He won't listen to anyone besides you."
You blow out a breath of air with a nervous chuckle, shifting your weight from one foot to the other as you look up at your supervisor. She looked mad. Her brow was ticked upwards, a wrinkly finger holding up a sheet of paper that had 'Todoroki' scribbled at the top. His latest speech evaluation report.
"He can talk just fine with the insults he was spitting at the other doctors. That man has a foul mouth, and an even fouler mood. No doctor that comes even within five feet of him is spared his horrible remarks and glares. But in all of your reports, you never once mentioned him saying anything exceptionally rude. He's... quiet around you."
Your brows pinch together as your gaze stays on the report in your hands
Touya was confusing you.
"And I understand you have other patients, but they've all progressed nicely with their treatments. Todoroki - well, he is a special case."
You were being asked to accept the job of having Touya as your sole patient. You knew his condition was bad - but you didn't think it was this bad. The other doctors had all come to the same conclusion, that he was in desperate need of a single support system. Someone who could help him every step of the way - and they had made a unanimous vote for you to be that person.
You accepted. You thought you'd have to think more about the proposal, but...
"Touya, do you like board games?"
For the first time this entire evening, his eyes lift from the tiled floor he'd been glaring at as he turns to you with a look of disinterest. You try not to let him see the way you're fighting back a smile when he finally speaks for the first time this afternoon
"I haven't played one since I was a kid. I don't even remember how they work."
"That's ok - I can teach you!"
He looks out the window, gently rolling his shoulders as the muscles under his hospital gown shift from the movement
"Why? Just sounds like a waste of time to me." He says, his voice gruff as you gently drag your chair closer to his bed
"Well, some of these games involve some brain work. Don't you think it'd be a nice challenge to try and work them out? We can even-"
"No."
You pause when he interrupts you, folding your hands in your lap as you patiently wait for him to continue. Your smile falters when he starts staring again, his eyes opening a little more to watch you as he remains silent and still - not elaborating any further.
"Ok-"
"Call Endeavor."
You pause, trying not to show your surprise as you quickly close your parted lips when you meet his gaze.
Nothing. His eyes were devoid of even a speck of emotion as he stared at you. If it hadn't been for him moving to run a tired hand through his white locks, you would've thought he was dead. That is just how dull his eyes looked.
"Well... let's talk about this first, okay? Why would you like to call him, Touya?" You ask softly, moving to grab his hand like you'd do to comfort any other patient before your fingers awkwardly hover over his hand
Touya did not like to be touched.
He narrows his eyes at you with an annoyed sigh before he looks away again, clearing his throat before speaking
"I need to do something."
You frown, taking a quick glance at the emergency phone across the room. There were a few contacts Touya would be allowed to call - one of them was, unfortunately, Endeavor's.
"Are you sure you'd like to call your father-"
"Don't fucking call him that."
You freeze, a chill running down your spine that feels like being dowsed in ice water when he snaps at you. His eyes burn to life, the hatred in them so strong that you can't even bring yourself to look at him as you realize you'd crossed some sort of an invisible line.
"I- okay, I'm sorry. Do you not like it when I address him as that?"
His silence was all the answer you needed.
Maybe it was your guilt that had you hesitantly reaching for the phone. You power it on - and you can see the poorly hidden surprise on his face when he quirks an eyebrow, surprised you were fulfilling his request.
He almost feels bad for what he's about to do. Almost.
"I'll hold the phone up to your ear, Touya. Let me know if I'm too close, ok?" You ask gently, and he nods his head with a grunt. He's not staring anymore - he's actually avoiding your eyes. Maybe you should've taken that as a sign that something was wrong, but you were too busy trying to understand what was going through his mind that made him want to call his father so out of the blue.
You pray silently that Endeavor won't answer - but the phone is barely on the third ring before it cackles to life
"Touya? Touya this is your number calling me - Touya are you there?"
The air is tense with your anticipation - could this mean progress? Barely two weeks in seemed a little early, but you sent Touya an encouraging smile anyways.
That was the last thing he needed to give him the courage to open his mouth
"Fuck you Endeavor! Burn in hell you flaming piece of shit!"
Your yelp doesn't surprise Touya at all as you hastily end the call, fumbling with the phone as he kneels over and grasps the railings of his bed - before he laughs.
It hurts so much to smile, but he does it anyway - his laughter is a hoarse wheeze as his chest shakes. You power the phone off with trembling hands before whipping towards him
"Touya- y-you tricked me!" You sputter, clutching the phone to your chest as he struggles to breathe. He whacks his chest, as if he's trying help the oxygen reach his lungs - and your eyes widen in panic
He lets out a deep exhale, turning to you with a barely noticeable smirk when he sees the dread in your eyes
"That was too easy. You shouldn't be so nice to me, Doc."
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"Well... this could be considered progress, sir! He's, uhm - open to communication?"
Endeavor is not amused. He drills you for another fifteen minutes - demanding to know every little thing about Touya's recovery process, and each minute you shrink further and further into your seat.
Who knew Touya would be the one to come to your rescue?
The undeniable beep that comes from your pocket immediately rips away your attention from Endeavor
Beep beep beep beep-
"What is that?" He nearly growls as you fumble with the small device in your hands, desperatly trying to turn it off as your feet move towards the double-doors quickly
"Touya's emergency button, he's calling me - I'm so sorry but we need to continue this conversation another time! " You yell over your shoulder before he can even get another word out, racing to the elevators as you come to a stumbling stop in front of them - you press the third floor button four times before the beeping starts up again.
Your mind immediately thinks the worst, and you're practically flying to the stairs as you run by two families and nearly knock a fellow doctor off his feet in your race towards Touya's room
Touya jumps when his room door slams open, his brows furrowing as he discreetly tries to see what made you run into his room in such a haste.
There were a few strands of hair that had fallen from your updo - you're panting as you take in Touya - sitting just fine on his bed as he stares at you. There's a hint of amusement in his eyes when he sees you before he slowly turns away.
He peers down to the device in his hands as he points it at the TV - clicking the small red button on it over and over again.
"A-Are you-"
"It won't turn off."
He waves the remote at the TV again, grumbling all sorts of profanities under his breath as he stubbornly tries to will the screen to shut off - the news played softly through the speakers as you slowly nod your head
"We use this remote for that."
He eyes the device in your hands before holding up the one in his hand
"Then what the hell is this for?"
"Emergencies. You press it when you need me and it is urgent - I check in periodically anyways, so you only use this remote when you really need me to come right away. You pressed it a lot of times before, so I had to run here. I thought something was wrong." You sigh, rubbing your temple as he turns over the device in his hand with a thoughtful hum. You gather the fallen strands in your palm and work on quietly fixing your hair.
"Why are you so nice to me?"
You pause from where you were tying your hair - lowering your hands into your lap as you tilt your head at him in confusion. Touya's glad he interrupted you while you were tying your hair - because now it falls over your shoulders in soft waves. He thinks you look... nice like this. He wonders if this will be the only time you'll let your hair flow freely in front of him.
The bluntess of his question was what made your hands drop. His words hang in the air as you try to formulate a response, but he cuts you off before you can get a word out.
"The other bastards treat me the way I deserve to be treated. How come you're actually trying? What's in it for you?"
He seems annoyed. But then you see the sincerity in his eyes - and you realize he genuinely didn't think he deserved any form of kindness. You want to hug him - but you also would like your limbs to stay in tact, so instead - you lean forward with a soft smile.
"You see, I like to think of people as flowers."
He stays silent, waiting for you to continue.
"Some grow in open fields with the sun shining over them all the time. Some grow through the cracks in concrete - and some die from drowning in too much rain or being dried out from the heat."
Something in his eyes softens at your words
"All flowers are beautiful you know - the ones people say are too far gone can still be preserved. I really like pressing flowers, you know, in glass. It reminds me that their beauty is an everlasting type of thing."
You pretend not to notice the sheen in his eyes when he stares at you. It's quiet. The curtains move from the gentle breeze that enters through the open window, and it catches wisps of your open hair in it as you smile.
Touya had thought he'd seen it all. The ugliness of the world, the terrible parts no one should venture into. How many times had he lied when he'd say "I've seen it all." ?
He realizes how wrong he was when he understands he forgot to look through the cracks in the dark walls he'd been surrounded by for so long - the splits and breaks in the surface where hope seeped through. There was still so much he wanted to see.
Flowers. Who knew something so little could mean so much?
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CARNATIONS MASTERLIST.
@dabislittlemouse @rueclfer @kawaiidemoneart @porusuniverse
@starrmage @lilbeatlebear @bokukenmakuroo @bbluefllame
âŹ†ïž i love u all for the support đŸ„șđŸ©· thank you. i am seriously so greatful :(
please let me know if you would like your username to be removed or added!! i got a little excited with the taglist sowwy 😖
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sonyaheaneyauthor · 1 month ago
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I've almost reached my breaking point with this genocide in Ukraine. I'm older than most Tumblr users, so I was being yelled at in university tutorials in the early 00s for talking about the Holodomor, and being told that "If it happened, Ukrainians deserved it for being Nazis".
I was out there in 2007 when we had the worldwide march for the Holodomor to be recognised as a genocide, only for so many countries (the USA being one of them) to tell us that they won't do it because it might upset russia.
I remember when russia invaded in 2014 and Obama said it wasn't his business, and that russia can decide what happens in Ukraine. And then he sent Ukraine fucking helmets and "hygiene kits" instead of the military aid he was supposed to.
My family in Donetsk walked out of their homes with their lives packed in plastic shopping bags nearly eleven years ago. But people prefer to believe the russian lies that Donbas wants to be part of russia.
I remember sitting at home on the 17th of July 2014, hearing about russia shooting down MH17, and feeling my blood run cold because the initial reports said the aeroplane was full of Americans. Being so sure that the USA might finally live up to the Budapest Memorandum and get involved in the war.
Of course they didn't.
And then the Malaysians went and protested at the Ukrainian embassy, as if they were to blame for being invaded by their genocidal neighbour.
I remember being at a protest at the russian embassy in Canberra just after Crimea was annexed, and the only people who turned up for us were other Ukrainians. Soon after there were massive protests for Palestine and BLM from Melbourne to Dublin and beyond. Ukrainians are too white for leftists and too foreign for right-wingers to care about.
More people dumped buckets of ice on their heads than supported us.
I spent Easter 2016 in a hotel in Ukraine. 8.5 years ago I was the only guest who wasn't a soldier on leave from the war.
Now I go on reddit and see that Americans are discussing how Ukraine "has a neo-fascist problem". Um, you guys just voted for Donald fucking Trump?
Then I see an Australian journalist say that the US election result means that America is "becoming like Eastern Europe". No. Eastern Europeans aren't Nazis. They suffered more under the Nazis than anyone.
We're always on our own. Millions upon millions of Ukrainians have been killed in the last ninety years, millions more sold into slavery in Germany (including my grandparents), hundreds of thousands sent to gulags (including the entire population of my grandmother's village), and hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of thousands dead or missing now, but we're still not seen as worthy of caring about.
I have family members whose dead bodies have been lying on battlefields for over a year. One killed in Bakhmut, a city that no longer exists. Another taken hostage from Mariupol, a city russia bombed to the ground. The mass graves there can be seen from space.
We can't get the bodies back because russia has colonised the area. I have a relative who was moved on from fighting in Vovchansk because there was no point fighting for another city that no longer exists. My relative who was taken hostage in Mariupol was starved and tortured for 2.5 years.
And then last week our city's magazine had a three-page interview with the russian ambassador, explaining why his country "has" to commit genocide in Ukraine. The editor laughed at my aunt when she phoned to register a complaint.
But teenaged tankies on sites like this will mock Ukrainians' deaths, stick a fucking hammer and sickle in their profile, and lecture people like me about things they know nothing about.
The world needs to end its ridiculous love affair with the russian federation.
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adrienneleclerc · 8 months ago
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That’s That Me Espresso
Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Hispanic/Latina! Reader
Summary: Charles and Y/N have been dating for a few weeks, they met after the Suzuka Grand Prix. Even though their relationship has been short lived, there’s something about her that has Charles down bad. They are living proof of how the boyfriend should always like the girlfriend more.
Warning: Grammatical and spelling errors
A/N: For those who voted for idea 2, about Charles being auctioned off for charity? Yeah, I'm not vibing with that idea anymore. But i am working on the fanfic where Charles thinks Y/N likes Lando.
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Charles was never one to chase girls. Sure, in every relationship he was in, he was the best boyfriend he could be, he would be so devoted to them. But in his current relationship, he has never felt this way before. He was away for the Imola Grand prix and he couldn't sleep so he decided to call Y/N. After a few rings, she answered.
"Bueno?" Y/N asked sleepily.
"Hello, mon ange, did I wake you?" Charles asked.
"Sort of, is something wrong, Charlie?" Y/N asked.
"Oh nothing, I'm just having trouble sleeping without you here, you know?" Charles said.
"I’m sorry I couldn’t make it to this Grand Prix, cariño, i just have a lot of in-person meetings. Plus, you've been to countless races before, you would think you'd be used to sleeping alone." Y/N said.
"Yes, but that was before i met you. Now when i'm in bed alone, it feels like I'm missing something.” Charles confessed.
“You’re so sweet. But seriously, muñeco, you have media day in the morning, and I can’t have you be sleepy during the interviews, Fred would kill you.” Y/N said.
“No he wouldn’t, I’m il predestinato, the prince of Ferrari.” Charles said.
“Muñeco.” Y/N warned.
“Alright Mon ange, I’ll go to sleep, but please FaceTime me before you go to work.” Charles said.
“Of course, Charlie. Te quiero mucho, Goodnight.” Y/N said.
“Yo tambiĂ©n te quiero, Goodnight.” Charles tried his best to say in Spanish and he hung up.
The next morning, Y/N woke up, showered, did her after shower routine, got dressed and she was about to make breakfast when Charles decided to FaceTime her. She answered.
“Muñeco, how are you? Did you get some sleep?” Y/N asked.
“I did actually, it took a while though.” Charles said.
“Well when you’re back in Monaco, I’ll be sleeping by your side.” Y/N said, she set her phone against something in the kitchen so she can make pancakes.
“Sounds perfect, I’ll be counting down the days.” Charles said.
“You think you’ll make podium?” Y/N asked.
“I’ll dedicate my podium to you, Mon ange.” Charles said. They kept talking while Y/N made her breakfast, Charles also took his phone with him to eat when his room service came so they had breakfast together,
“Charlie, baby, i need to go to work, okay, I’ll talk to you soon, te quiero.” Y/N said.
“Yo más.” Charles replied and hung up the call. There was a knock on his hotel room door and he opened it to see Carlos. “Good morning, Carlos.”
“Morning. Were you talking with Y/N?” Carlos asked
“Yes i was.” Charles replied smiling.
“Ay, I should have known, she has you completely smitten.” Carlos says.
“I know, mate, there’s just something about her.” Charles said, sighing like a person in love.
“You are whipped, it’s entertaining to see you like that. We need to head to paddock now for the interviews.” Carlos said before him and Charles left the hotel room.
Meanwhile, Y/N was finishing up her third meeting of the day when she got w FaceTime call from Y/N so she excused herself.
“Charlie querido, what is it? I’m technically still in a meeting.” Y/N said.
“Sorry Mon ange, I just wanted to see how you are, I am on break right now and then I have more interviews before the race,” Charles said.
“I’m fine, just a little tired, I call you later tonight okay? Then you can tell me all about your day. Te quiero.” Y/N said, blowing him a kiss.
“Yo más” Charles said, doing the same thing before hanging up. Y/N was about to enter the conference room again but she was stopped by her assistant.
“You got that man wrapped around your finger.” Monica commented,
“Well i wouldn’t necessarily say that I have him wrapped around my finger. Pero es si, lo tengo mal (But Yeah, i got him down bad).” Y/N said.
“How? Like what’s your secret?” Monica asked.
“There’s no secret, it’s just that me espresso.” Y/N said.
“Ha ha, no go, you have a meeting to run.” Monica said. Y/N entered the conference room to continue the meeting.
Her workday was done and she got a text from Charles and it was a link to one of his interviews. She clicked on it and she was watching it but there was a question that Charles answered that surprised her.
“Charles Leclerc, what is your favorite saying?” The interviewer asked.
“I Don’t know if it’s a popular saying or an actual saying in general, but my girlfriend says ‘that’s that me espresso’. When she was younger, her mom would say she was like a shot so espresso because of how hyper and energetic she was as a child, basically bouncing off the walls. So now when I ask her a question about anything she does, she’ll say that’s that me espresso or it’s just that me espresso, meaning that’s just how she is. How do I get crying babies to stop? That’s that me espresso, I have no idea but I guess I just have a calming presence.” Charles said laughing. Y/N stopped the video and FaceTimed Charles,
“Hey Muñeco.” Y/N said.
“Hello, ma Belle, did you see that interview?” Charles asked.
“I did, you used my phrase.” Y/N said.
“Of course I did, it’s my favorite saying in the world, it perfectly describes you. You are a shot of espresso, a moment with you has me smiling for hours, I can’t get enough of you.” Charles said,
“Eres tan cursi (you are so cheesy) but i love that about you.” Y/N said.
They continued talking until it was time for bed.
Race Weekend was done and Y/N can continue working from her home office, she didn’t didn’t have any meetings to attend to in person, she was free. She was finishing up some files when the doorbell rang. Y/N got up and answered the door and she saw a huge bouquet of her favorite flowers (mine are peonies because of Blair Waldorf).
“Whats this?” Y/N asked and the bouquet of flowers were lowered to reveal a smiling Charles Leclerc. “Muñeco!”
“Mon ange!” Charles exclaimed, they entered her apartment and they hugged as soon as charles put the bouquet on the kitchen counter, he spun her around and out her back on the ground to leave her kisses all over her face. “I missed you so much.”
“I missed you too, I thought you weren’t coming until tomorrow, did you come here straight from the airport?” Y/N asked, taking in Charles’s hoodie and baggy jeans,
“Yes I did. I stopped by the florist first, obviously.” Charles said, gesturing to the bouquet,
“They’re beautiful.” Y/N said. “What brings you here?”
“Because I wanted to tell you up something important. I know we haven’t been dating for a long time but I have never felt this strongly about someone, I love you, te amo, estoy enamorado de ti (i am in love with you).” Charles said. Y/N starts tearing up,
“Ay muñeco, yo tambiĂ©n te amo.” Y/N said, hugging him. “Je suis amoureux de toi.” Now it was Charles’s turn to tear up, she just told him she was in love with him too. They kissed.
“I fall in love with you more and more each day, I can’t get enough of you, how do you do that?” Charles asked, brushing Y/N’s hair back. Y/N just shrugged.
“That’s that me espresso.” Y/N said and both of them laughed, Charles pulled Y/N onto the couch and started talking about where to go out today,
The End
I had no idea where I was going with this short imagine but I hope y’all like it!
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latenightdaydreams · 6 months ago
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Horangi x König x Reader (fem)
Poll story! Thank you to everyone who voted!
MDNI🔞
Master List
>cw: fem/afab, threeway, p in v, oral
2.8 word count
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After a long mission, König and Horangi decide to go to a local bar to drink and celebrate a job well done. They get a table in the back, per König’s request. He hates when people stare at him, and they always do. Horangi makes his way to the bar to order them some drinks when he passes you. You’re there with some friends, it looks like. Stunning.
On his way back from the bar with drinks in hand, Horangi has an excited sparkle in his brown eyes. He places the drinks down on the table and then slams his fist down.
“There is the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen here.”
König looks at Horangi annoyed, “You know we don’t have the same type.”
“No, this woman transcends types. She’s just stunning.”
“Where?”
“The one in black sitting at the big round table. Go grab napkins or something and look at her,” Horangi encourages König.
“No, that’s weird.”
“Shut up, go!” Horangi playfully demands of him.
König stands from the table, glaring at Horangi as he turns to walk off. He walks past the table you’re sitting at and he sees you. It’s almost like time stood still for a moment as his eyes fall on you. Horangi was right. You’re divine. He almost stumbles over his own feet as he simply turns around. Horangi face-palming at how awkward König is.
“Mein Gott, she’s beautiful.”
“I know. I wonder if either of us would have a chance.” Horangi looks over his shoulder in your direction.
König slips his beer underneath his sniper hood as he takes a sip and looks over at you, too. König’s picked women up at the bar before, but never one that looks like you. You seem almost untouchable.
“We should talk to her.”
“We?” König looks at Horangi wide eyed.
“Yes, we. After the mission we went on, why not?”
König’s eyes went back to you before taking another drink. “You’re crazy then.”
“If we had the chance to have the three-way we always talked about, it would be with her.”
He has a point, but it still feels weird to just approach a random woman at the bar. Especially when you’re as big as König. That’s just not something you do. At the same time, it has been a while since he’s been with a woman

Before König could give his final opinion, Horangi springs up from his seat and makes his way over to you. König watches with wide eyes as Horangi puts on his best confident stride and casually walks up beside you.
“Hello,” Horangi greets your group of friends to be polite before turning to you. “I just wanted to speak for me and my friend over there and say that you’re the most beautiful woman we’ve ever seen.”
König can see Horangi point to him. His face turns hot as he tries to not pay too much attention. He can’t believe Horangi is actually going through with this. What if it works?
You gaze into the beautiful brown eyes of this man dressed in a military uniform and peer over to his friend sitting in the back. A smile spreads across your lips as you take in his words. His Korean accent adding to his charm.
“That’s very sweet of you two.” You smirk and look back over at his friend. “Are you two military?”
“Yes, we are. We just came back from deployment actually. It’s just us celebrating our return home
if you’d like to join?”
There is a small giggle from the women you’re with as you turn to them. Your closest friend gives you a thumbs up and a wink, boosting your confidence. After a short moment of taking in everyone’s expressions, you turn back to him.
“Sure, why not.”
Under Horangi’s mask, he smiles widely. He steps back to allow you room to follow him back to the table König’s waiting at. König sat there looking dumbfounded. How? How did he get her over here?
“I’m Horangi, an Operator at KorTac. This is König, Colonel at KorTac.”
A pair of icy blue eyes look at you from underneath a sniper hood. Sitting, König looks like a giant. He reaches his hand out to shake yours.
“Pleasure to meet you.” A thick Austrian accent carries his words.
“Pleasure to meet you too.” You place your hand in his. His hand completely dwarfs your own.
After two hours of talking to the two men and light drinking, Horangi decides it’s now or never to ask. He clears his throat and looks at König. König, looking at your love struck, didn’t notice his friends’ social cues. So Horangi just cut him off mid sentence.
“Would you all want to continue this conversation back to my place?” Horangi’s soft brown eyes gaze into your own, running down to your lips making your heart flutter.
You’re not married, young, and trying to explore new things after your most recent break up. A one-night stand, let alone group sex, is something that would usually turn you off immediately. Maybe it’s the lift trials or the fact both men are charming, but you nod in agreement. König’s in disbelief. Horangi is a mad man, a genius. How is he so smooth with women?
König finishes his final drink and stands, revealing his true height. You just look up at him in awe. Horangi is around 6 feet, which is already tall. König is nearly a foot taller than Horangi. A god almost. König looks down to see how you’re staring at him, causing his breath to catch in his throat.
Once back at Horangi’s apartment, he walks you into his bedroom. You look around, taking in the small things that tell you about him. As you look, you can hear König shut the bedroom door behind you.
Horangi pulls his balaclava off, showing his handsome face to you for the first time. He runs a hand through his thick black hair as he approaches you. König watches your body language and how you’re receiving the advances from his friend.
You stand there feeling the tension rising in the bedroom as Horangi puts his hands on your waist, pulling you closer to him. His hand cupping your cheek and bringing you in for a kiss. You kiss back as his hand glides over your body, squeezing your ass.
Horangi opens his eyes in the kiss to look at König watching them and motion in over. König took a deep breath and walked up behind you, sandwiching you in-between both men. A chill runs down your spin as König wraps his massive hands around your stomach, reaching for the hem of your shirt and lifting it up.
König pulls your shirt off, tossing it onto the floor. Horangi leans down, kissing your cleavage as he snakes his hands behind your back to unhook your bra. His hands guide it off of your body as his kisses lower to your breasts, slowly finding your nipple. A soft sigh comes from your lips that gets both men excited.
With one hand, König lifts his mask slightly to reveal his mouth. He places a trail of kisses along your neck and down your back slightly. His hands wrap around your waist to caress your stomach. Horangi licking and sucking on your sensitive nipples makes you whimper softly. You turn your head to the side to look at König as he kisses back up your neck. His lips press against yours with a needy passion you’ve never felt before.
Horangi gently turns your body so you face König. You tilt your head all the way back to look up into his blue eyes. The small part of his face you can see from him holding up his mask has a scar across it, making you wonder if that’s the only reason he’s wearing it.
König pinches your chin between his fingers to hold your head up to him as he leans down to kiss you again. He slips his tongue out, pressing it past your lips. Both of your tongues swirl together before he gently bites your bottom lip. His other hand gropes at your breasts, twirling your nipple between his fingers.
Horangi stands behind you, grabbing at the buttons on your pants and undoing them. He drags your pants down, staring at your shapely ass in a peach-colored thong. As he pulls your pants down, he drops to his knees, taking a firm bite out of your ass. His hands rubbing circles and slapping lightly.
“You have a fantastic body, y/n.” Horangi groans before slapping your ass once more.
König lowers his mouth to your breasts, suckling hungrily at your breasts. Once your pants are lowered, he slips one hand down and caresses your soft mound. He slips his fingers between your legs and rubs your folds through your panties, feeling a wet spot already formed.
In one swift motion, König lifts you and Horangi pulls your pants off the way. You wrap your legs around König as he walks you to the bed. He sits you down on the blue bedsheets, gently pushing you back. His fingers slide down your body and pull your thong off. He takes a moment to appreciate how beautiful your pussy is. Horangi undresses as he watches König lightly rub his thumb over your clit.
König takes a step back and looks at Horangi as he undresses as well. He lifts his shirt off, revealing his firm body riddled with scars. Your eyes roam all over Horangi's and König’s bodies. Both men are stunning.
They approach you on the bed, giving each other a glance as if trying to communicate what to do. Horangi joins you on the bed, pulling you back to him as he relaxes back on his pillows. His fingers play with your nipples and lips kissing your skin gently while König lays belly down in front of you.
König lifts his mask slightly, leaning his head down to kiss your pussy. You gaze down at his blue eyes as he looks back up at you. Your head drops back on Horangi’s shoulders as you moan out from the pleasure of König’s fat tongue slipping along your folds.
“Beautiful sounds.” Horangi whispers to you as he pinches your nipple lightly.
Your body was overwhelmed with the pleasure of both men touching you. Your hips move slightly in rhythm with König's tongue. His large hands come up and hold your hips still, a small smirk at the corner of his lips. It gives him an ego boost to see you reacting the way you are.
As König sucks on your clit, causing your legs to twitch, Horangi’s lips lock with yours. You both kiss passionately as you moan into his mouth. His hands grasp your breasts and squeeze tightly.
“Oh fuck.” You moan, turning your head to look back down at König.
“Are you going to cum already, love?”
You nod as you gaze down at König. Your fingers grasp as Horangi’s legs next to you as your back arches. The feeling of König sucking while licking your clit is too much to hold back from. As your eyes flutter a loud moan escapes you.
König buries his face deeper into your cunt as you cum. He wants to taste all of you. His blue eyes close as he rests his head on your tight, lazily licking your clit still until you come down from your orgasm. He sucks lightly once more before moving himself up, grabbing your hands and pulling you forward.
“All four, Liebling.”
You listen and get on all four as König kneels before you. His hand comes up and caresses your hair as Horangi stands behind you. He rubs his cock along your slick folds, a small groan escaping his lips as he anticipates what your cunt will feel like wrapped around his cock.
König gazes down at you as Horangi pushes his cock into your pussy. Your eyes light up with pleasure. Once your mouth falls open to let a moan out, König’s tip slips into your mouth. Feeling overwhelmed with desire, you accept his cock into your mouth. You suck on the tip as you gaze into König’s eyes.
His mask falls forward as he gazes down with lust. The way your plump lips feel is heaven. His eyes close and drops his head back. One hand reaching to your hair and helping guide you up and down his fat shaft.
Horangi moans as your tight pussy swallows him whole, his hips rolling quickly into you as he watches you suck König’s cock. His fingers grasp your supple ass tightly. His balls slam into your clit with every thrust adding to your pleasure. His hand raises and slams back down, slapping your ass hard enough to leave a print.
You moan as König’s fat cock is gagging you, pushing more down your throat. König grabs your hair tighter and thrust his hips forward into your mouth. His eyes travel down your body to Horangi’s face full of pleasure making him wonder how your cunt will feel.
König gives Horangi a look as if he wants to switch. Horangi nods and gives you a few more fast thrusts before pulling out. You gaze up at König as he moves. Horangi steps off the bed and stands at the side of the bed.
“Can you lay on your back for us, Liebling?”
You nod and look at both men as you lie on your back. Horangi gently pulls you to the edge of the bed by your shoulders leaving you head to dangle off the edge slightly. König rests his massive body between your legs, looking down at your pussy.
König slaps his cock on your sensitive cunt as he watches Horangi gently guide his cock into your mouth. His pale blue eyes drop back down and places his cock teasing your tight little cunt with his tip. Finally, he rolls his hips forward. A muffled moan leaves your mouth as you feel König cock stretch you.
Horangi places one hand underneath your head to hold you up slightly as he thrust his cock in and out of your mouth. He pushes in slowly and holds it to see how far he can go before you begin to gag. Your breasts bounce from the motion of König slamming his broad hips into your delicate body.
Horangi pushes in more and more, you gag lightly but don’t turn your head away. The outline of his cock in your throat as you fully take him in. König watches and it only turns him on even more.
“Gott, you’re perfect.” König moans out.
Both men experience physical and visual bliss seeing the way you are able to handle two cocks. You feel as if you’re on cloud nine as these men take out months of sexual frustration on you.
“Where do you want out cum, love?” Horangi asks as he reaches out and slaps your left breasts lightly.
“Anywhere.”
Horangi and König look at each other, again as if talking through visual cues. They both gently pull out of you. König grabs your legs as he does and drags you to the edge of the bed before lifting you up and setting you on the ground.
You look up at both men as you kneel before them. Both men continue to stroke their cocks as they approach you. König gently caresses your face and turns you to look up at both of them. His thumb caresses your bottom lip gently opening your mouth.
Horangi is the first, his moans coming out low and shaky. His cock twitches slightly as hot ropes of his cum go across your face. You gaze up at his brown eyes as he finishes. König steps forward and rests his cock on the tip of your bottom lip. His cock throbbing as it releases large spurts into your mouth. His moans are soft and high pitches. You suck on the tip of his dick once he finishes and swallow his load.
Horangi and König look at each other with a proud look on their faces before looking back down at you.
“I’ll go start a bath.” Horangi says as König lifts you up.
König carries you to the bathroom behind Horangi. His eyes glossing over your naked body, he can’t believe he has been privileged enough to touch you. Both men would make sure they show you how much they appreciate you giving yourself to them.
The next morning you wake up snuggled in between both men. König’s head resting on yours with his hand cupping your bare breasts. Horangi’s face is almost pressed into yours as his arm is around your waist. You relax into the warmth they generate and smirk. This turned out to be a great decision.
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hurtspideyparker · 9 months ago
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One night in the lab Peter finds an old prototype of the EDITH glasses and puts them on.
"Look Mr. Stark! I am Iron Man," he says with a deep voice.
"C'mon kid, that's the best impression you got?" Tony says before looking up.
He sees Peter with those rectangular frames and big grin. For a moment he thinks he's looking at old publicity photos of himself. A confident Tony Stark, tinted glasses and cocky smile, hair fluffed up and oozing manly charm.
Tony's easy smile drops a bit at the thought of Peter being anything like who he used to be.
"Oh sorry for talking over you Ms. Potts I just like the sound of my own voice more than hearing about the safety of our company. I'm too cool to apologize so I'll buy you a zoo for endangered species later honey," Peter tries again with the mocking deep voice.
Tony is quick to recover from the odd deja-vu feeling of seeing the teenager in the frame of a mirror, focusing back on his hologram.
"Yeah because I call the love of my life by her last name. And for your information it was an alpaca sanctuary, and she loved it." Tony corrects, pointing a pen at Peter in rebuke without looking up from his work.
"I chose to be respectful over accurate. Also I saw those alpaca photos and one of them was trying to chew on her skirt, she didn't look very impressed." Peter replies with a matter of fact press of his lips.
Tony glances back at the boy only to find himself unable to look away. He can't help but hear echoes of "I just wanted to be like you!" when he sees the boy wearing frames reminiscent of Tony's classic fashion sense.
Tony thinks about Howard, how he used to run laps to prove he was good enough, better than, worthy of being his son.
He was never enough for Howard.
"You're always better at remembering that kind of stuff than me anyways kid."
Peter is taken back by the earnest tone the older man suddenly possesses. His mouth opens but no words come out in reply, Tony looking at him as if he can see right through the spiderling.
"Now stop playing with my old crap and c'mere, we have some important decisions to make," Tony waves him over to look at something on his phone.
When Peter gets close enough he sees that it's a food delivery app, Tony's fingers hovering between an Indian and Thai restaurant.
Peter shoots him another grin, "I vote for samosas!"
Tony rolls his eyes but clicks on the Indian restaurant anyways.
Peter notices in the reflection of the phone that he still has the glasses on, reaching up to remove them before Tony puts a hand on his wrist to stop him.
"Keep em on, it's the first time you've ever looked cool enough to hang out with me. The tech in those is useless anyways, they're just a pair of sunglasses now."
Peter looks up at his mentor with such awe and admiration that Tony nearly melts like butter under the sun.
Tony may not do many things right when it comes to people, but he knows that even when he was still young and naive he'd known better than to ever look at Howard like that.
So maybe there's one thing he hasn't screwed up.
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