#and yes yes i know Rebel is out too but i think the heartbreak traumatized me

[kakikoo]

Was anyone going to tell me that Life After Legend (I and II) were apparently just sitting in Marie Lu's story highlights or was I supposed to find that out just searching through Goodreads (thank you user Cindy!)

[chocolatemilksmoothie]

Labyrinth Runners

Omg I loved this one!! buckle up, there's a lot of little details and a lot to point out

I suspected we might not get an update on Luz and the rest of the owl house members and the suspense there is killing me ngl...

I can already see it, both groups meet and both are like "we have SO much to tell you you're not gonna believe this-"

anyways, baby Willow and baby Gus my beloveds

I love their relationship. they were there for each other before anyone else was, and you can see how deeply they care for one another

Gus is a scary good illusionist, it must be frightening to have that happen

ahh good ol' breathing exercises, always worth a shot

I ADORE that Bump allows more kids to try multi track magic, and Matt got into illusion magic! aww

Among Luz's messages was "don't scare him(them?) away" I think she was referring to Hunter. it's sweet she took the time to write that, but god I hope she's safe

the hearts they are adorable <3

I enjoyed Willow and Amity's plot as well! Amity trying to protect her because he values having her back vs Willow wanting her to see that she is strong and can fight alongside her!

he's been reading about Grimwalkers... oh buddy what have you learned?

it's both sweet and heartbreaking that 1) he thought of hexside as a safe place to hide and 2) he's wearing the Flyer Derby outfit. he really had a good time being a normal kid for a day :')

Adrian. I like his style but I did NOT buy his act. How horrifying that he was tricking students into getting sigils by pretending he was helping them not get sigils. messed up

they really made him a pretentious director. I love it. both he and Terra are scary and full of personality, very fun antagonists to see

Love his design also. Everything about it

Severine... is voiced by Dana right? she was hilarious, go back to the tiny cat coven girl they don't deserve u here

Loved the concept of a trippy labyrinth of familiar places too

throw yourself down the steps to see if they're real, flawless technique

once again Hunter parallels another character. Gus is trusting by nature, which has led to him getting hurt, while Hunter grew up in a competitive, hostile environment where the only person he trusted blindly ended up being a monster. He is being extra cautious. But Gus won't hurt him

God, Belos sent a search party and is pretending like he's all worried. he hasn't told anyone he ran away. but we know what'll happen if he goes back to the castle *shudders*

the acting and animation for the panic attack, the breathing and the hesitation were done with a lot of care. I also like that it's in "Gus' room"

I love Gus I love him lots ok

the banned posters I love my children lmao

HIGH FIVE

I'm so happy Hunter still calls Willow "captain" he respects her a ton

and again, it makes sense he noticed she wasn't the real one. Gus is trusting, and Willow has never taken advantage of his trust, while Hunter is super on edge atm

"put him-" "out of his misery? got it" jesus dude he just kicked you

HIS TEAMMATES SAVED HIM

"dude looks sickly" yeah he's been sleep deprived and mentally abused and probably not eating much it'll do that to ya

oh I love this little ragtag team of rebel witches (+ Gus of course)

Adrien wants to find the Galderstones for Belos. Funny, pretty sure that's an ingredient for a certain thing hmmm ever heard of Grimwalkers?

"in the name of the moon we will kick your ass!"

Gus' ability to make you see traumatic memories is messed up. Dana stop traumatizing the children challenge

Hunter and Gus bonding about how they've been deceived and used. and awww the breathing with whistling ahaha is this because of the tooth gap because same

GUS KEPT THE MIRROR THINGY YES

"what... is... this??" "just go with it" my heart

friends will hug you even if you haven't showered

the Illusion coven head got MESSED UP oh my god

Barcus cracks me up he's so well spoken

and we end with Hunter having a LOT to talk about, but also having a large group of people to support and watch out for him

I suspect they're all gonna start preparing to find Luz and the others and to stop Belos in the Day of Unity ohhhohoho I feel DREAD BABEYYY

this was a dense one, and the first episode without Luz in it. I expect next week we'll catch up with them, especially King, and hopefully by the end of next ep both teams meet up to prepare together...

[louloutche]

Motherland Fort Salem 1x07 - Mother Mycelium

Here we go again, here are my thoughts on that week’s episode.

The opening scene

First of all: the opening scene. It was pretty obvious that the episode would start with that but wow. The confrontation between Scylla and Alder, the illusion, the tension. It was intense and that’s why I loved every second of that. If I’m not wrong, this scene was also the first one where we got a glimpse of the Spree’s motivations. Now it’s starting to make sense. They are primarily opposed to the conscription but they are targeting civilians because they are the ones they actually hate. They think (and they might be right) that the hunt is not over, just different now, and all witches should be free of the humans. Now, we can actually identify with them and understand their motivations.

Abigail

I knew from the beginning I would like that character and I was right. How could you not?

Abigail at the beginning of the season every time Raelle did anything:

Abigail since ep 1x06 every time Raelle does anything:

She’s so supportive and that’s so beautiful. A real link is creating between Raelle and her and I’m here for that. I think sooner or later Raelle is going to push Abigail away because she feels smothered maybe? Deep down she’s glad that Abigail cares about her, but she’s been so used to rely only on herself that she will probably have a hard time believing that someone is willing to throw themselves under the train for her.

Honestly, some people say and/or wish Raelle is going to take responsibilities and become the head of the unit, but I wouldn’t mind if she didn’t. I think Abigail is a great leader because she’s devoted and protective, even if she doesn’t admit it.

Also, in this episode, we’re starting to see Abigail’s convictions crumble. Adil will be the element that will make her question the army more and more. He’s already started. He’s here to defy the idealized picture of the army she has been fed since she was born and prove there are always different sizes on a war. Not one, not even two, but many sizes and more often than not, innocent people, civilians suffer. Some people said they didn’t like the show because they thought it was glorifying the army. I don’t know where they got that impression from. Maybe Alder, but for the rest, I don’t really see any idolization and it was pretty obvious considering the angle the show was taking right from the beginning that there wouldn’t be such thing. Now we know there won’t be any.

To close that part about Abigail, I would love for her to develop a really bond with Augustin and whatever that other guy’s name is. It doesn’t mean I want them to have a romantic relationship (pretty easy to guess Adil will be her love interest) and I’m not even talking about friendship without sex. They could be friends with benefits. I’d just like to see her develop a meaningful friendship with them beyond sex. Just a personal wish.

Tally

We didn’t see much of her in that episode. I was disappointed, but that’s often the case in TV shows, not all characters can be at the center of each episode. Nevertheless I enjoyed that scene in the forest where Raelle tried to confront her. She will probably discover the truth soon, because Tally will tell her or in some other way. It could happen in the last episode, it would be one of the cliffhangers of the finale and would be pretty interesting in fact.

Raelle

I hadn’t commented on that so far, but I find it really interesting that her magic is based on speaking instead of singing. That’s a nice callback to paganism. But that’s precisely why I wonder why the girl said it was “pagan nonsense” or whatever. Their way of life is pagan. They celebrate Beltane, which is a pagan celebration, they refer to “the goddess”, which is probably the Triple Goddess (also called Hecate), they honor earth (Adil did in that episode). They are the definition of pagan witches, so I don’t understand why that girl would say that.

Now, that scene where Raelle fixed Khalida. She knows something is wrong and we know it too. It’s very clear that despite what Abigail said about Raelle being powerful and getting better, something unusual happened. Or didn’t happen precisely. Maybe the mushroom has something to do with that? Maybe Khalida is not really cured? That last guess doesn’t seem very likely to me, I think she is cured. But maybe that thing that was poisoning her got scared by Raelle and went away somehow, maybe it will infect someone else. But for me the best lead is the mushroom.

Scylla

It was pretty easy to see even before Anacostia said it that she was starting to have regrets. Her tears were for Raelle, for the shock of what Anacostia just did to her, but also for the realization of what she had done. Speaking of what Anacostia did to her, I wonder if they will treat it later. I don’t know if she’s the only witch able to do that in Fort Salem (I will speculate on that below), but there’s no doubt that being the victim of such invasion must be traumatic and Scylla might and should suffer aftereffects.

Raylla reunion

That. Scene. Was. So. Intense. Like, I said the opening scene was, but it was nothing compared to that one. Kudos to Amalia and Taylor. Their acting was on point, I almost cried. This was really, really impressive. I wish Scylla had told the truth, but at the end of the day, maybe it’s better. Raelle and her have such a special bond, I think that it will have more impact when the moment comes that Scylla told her that she loves her and she wouldn’t do anything to hurt her, instead of telling her what she had done and add something like “it was for the good of our people” or something like that. And I think Scylla understands Raelle very well and knows what will be efficient when the time comes. Raelle will be pissed when the truth comes out, but in my opinion she will be more inclined to take Scylla’s side (Scylla will probably not stay with the Spree much longer once she's out of this imprisonment and her side will be her own side) with what she told her. Once again, kudos to both of the actresses for that heartbreaking but beautiful scene.

But also, I'm not sure what was their purpose when they brought Raelle. Of course they wanted to weaken Scylla (Amalia confirmed it) and it worked, but did they have other intentions? Maybe Raelle wasn’t just a tool and she was also one of the goals. When she knocked everybody out during training and Izadora briefly talked to her, she said something like “let the army make you stronger”. It’s clear the army is very interested in Raelle, and for good reasons. What if they were trying to make sure she lays on them so that when the time is right, they can use her? They probably want her on their side, because she’s powerful and because she expressed her hatred, or at least her dislike toward the army, and it makes her dangerous. So maybe they have a plan and for that, they needed her to see Scylla without knowing who was holding and/or to be weakened and confused (what is real and what is not? did she dream? is she crazy? it could lead to (self)isolation and thus vulnerability), so that they can “come at her rescue”.

Anacostia

She will be a key element, there is no doubt about that. We can easily guess that sooner or later, probably not in season 1 but maybe in next seasons if the show is renewed, there will be a rebellion inside the army. It might be small with just Raelle, Scylla and a few others. Or it might be big. Like really big. My guess is that it’s going to start small and then it will get out of hand and there will be an actual mutiny against Alder and the established power. Some rebels might join the Spree, although I doubt it (if they do there are going to be few of them), some might just create their own new group, and that’s where it would become interesting, because then, people like Scylla who joined the Spree out of frustration and desperation might find something closer to their aspirations in that new group. Anyway, I’m drifting away.

If what I’m hypothesizing happens (not a very risky theory, but still), Anacostia will have a very important role. We knew at some point she would doubt Alder, and here we are. It was also very likely that sooner or later, she would have consideration and empathy for Scylla, and here we are. She had probably already noticed here and there that some of the things Alder was doing were not right, but now she’s slowly starting to realize that Alder’s is misusing her power. Or maybe she’s not there yet, but she will be. And I think that what Alder told her really hurt her. Not because of the words she used, because yes, it’s true and pretty logical that as an orphan, Anacostia has “a soft spot for orphans”. But the tone she used and the way she looked at her... Well, all that wasn’t very motherly, friendly or even sympathetic and I think Anacostia noticed the difference compared to the way she usually talks to her.

I will write it in the part about Anacostia, but now it’s about Alder too. I think one of the reasons why she reacted this way is because she’s freaking out at the mere idea of losing Anacostia. There might be personal feelings involved and of course she’s not stupid, she knows she’s on the edge and you might say “everybody wants her head”, so she doesn’t need to have one of her most loyal soldiers against her on top of that. But I’m pretty sure there’s something else. As I said above, I don’t know if Anacostia is the only witch able to do what she did with Scylla, but probably. While watching the episode, I was wondering if each witch had a special ability, but I don’t think so. They are better in different fields, just like every average human, but I don’t think they have “special attacks”. I think Anacostia is an exception. Beyond the fact that she’s super powerful, she has a gift. There’s a reason why Alder took interest in Anacostia above all the other orphans she raised other than the fact that Anacostia is completely devoted to her and very talented (I believe Alder complimented her on that in the scene where we saw the orphans). By the way, the devotion is starting to crumble and that’s probably what pushed Alder to react that way. Anacostia is probably some sort of “special weapon” for her, and she understands she might lose her. Alder showed up to interrogate Scylla herself, but Scylla didn’t talk despite her attempt to make her. She was already here, so why didn’t she infiltrate Scylla’s spirit herself? Probably because she can’t. She must be more powerful than Anacostia, but she can’t do what she does and that’s (one of the reasons) why she needs her and she was so upset when she saw Anacostia show signs of weakness.

Khalida

That little girl is crazy talented. The character, but also the actress. I don’t know how old she is, but an experimented and very good actress like Lyne was impressed (she talked about it in After The Storm). She said she had a very strong presence on set and I’m not surprised because it shows on screen. I can’t wait to see what will be her role in the next episodes. But seriously, can you imagine how powerful she is? She put Alder on her knees, both metaphorically and literally. I’m really excited to see what’s next.

Other questions, assumptions, thoughts, etc

When Izadora slit that girl’s throat? Disgusting in more ways than one. Can you imagine how f*cked up you have to be to do that kind of thing. And yes, she’s a bit creepy, maybe not all instructors would go that far, but it shows the kind of people the army is creating or at least letting fight in their rows and teach. Also, the fact that they could knock Raelle, Tally and Abigail out so easily was disturbing too. They’re only in their first year, we can guess older and more experimented witches might be able to resist or at least feel it, but still. Can you imagine what kind of power teachers and instructors have on you if they can do that?

This is kind of creepy that these old ladies are following Alder everywhere she goes (and hissing when she’s pissed). Don’t get me wrong, even if they don’t have any lines, I think that’s great that these old actresses got these roles. But story-wise, that must be strange for people around Alder. I guess they have to be near her for the spell to work (maybe it was explained off screen and I just didn’t see/hear it).

Witch daddy talked about revocation of the accord? That’s getting serious! It will be very interesting if it gets this far.

Did Khalida knew Raelle’s name because of the linking? Or is she some ancient entity / old wise lady in a child body? That was a bit disturbing. I like the character because but she is kind of creepy and have a strange way to speak and interact with people, even her brother.

How is Adil able to use magic? I thought only women could in witches lineage. Or maybe it’s true only for some ethnies or not for others?

There was a shift for two characters in that episode, Abigail and Anacostia, and I can’t wait to see where it leads them.

We didn’t see Bridey :( I hope she’s going to be back soon! But I doubt it, because it seems that time gaps between episodes are pretty long (or not always, because I don’t think Scylla has been sequestrated for that long, but I might be wrong) and we didn’t see her once in that episode while she was following Abigail like her shadow in the last one. But I’m hopeful, she might be back as a soldier and not Abigail’s bodyguard.

What will happen to Scylla now? They have a location and there will be an attack, but on a more personal level, they know that she murdered civilians. Will they keep her alive to get other information? Are they planning to kill her as soon as the attack is over? I’m a bit worried.

I will conclude this long as* post by saying that this mission is gonna be a disaster. Tally feels guilty, Raelle puked just before leaving the base and she’s very disturbed after seeing Scylla, Abigail is not focused because she’s bothered by what Adil told her and she's worried about Raelle but also probably about Tally because there’s no doubt she noticed she was avoiding Raelle. It’s going to be a mess.

[vvivacious101]

Re-rewatching S05E16 - Dark Side of the Moon

Oh god, this episode totally floored me. There is so much happening in this one but despite the information overload, this episode is phenomenal. I can already tell this is going to be a long post.

So, in “Dark Side of the Moon” Dean and Sam die and go to Heaven where Cas tells them not to let the angels find them yet because he sees this as an opportunity to talk to Joshua. Joshua is an angel who resides in the garden at Heaven and is rumored to talk to God, so Cas needs Sam and Dean to find the garden and talk to Joshua. Meanwhile, Zachariah is looking for the boys so he can put them back into their meatsuits so they can play their parts in the apocalypse but not before he gets some time to play (read torture) with them.

Zachariah is an interesting character. I have somehow always liked his character. He reminds me of Crowley.

Zachariah is an overacheiver, a teacher’s pet who thought his job would be so easy. Getting two monkeys to play their part, how hard could it be? He, of course, had never met the Winchesters and I get how he feels. Even though he is a dick, I understand the place where his anger comes from but I guess he does a pretty good job of illuminating that place himself.

Let me tell you something. I was on the fast track once. Employee of the Month, every month forever. I’d walk these halls, and people would AVERT THEIR EYES! I HAD RESPECT! And then, they assigend me you.

And the rest as they say is history. His downfall is so total that it’s almost comedic, but he was an interesting piece of this apocalyptic puzzle.

This dialogue of his from this epiosde is one of my favourites.

Wow. Running from angels... On foot... In heaven. With out-of-the-box thinking like that, I'm surprised you guys haven't stopped the apocalypse already.

Zach catches up with the boys and just as he is really getting started, Joshua arrives on the scene and tells Zach to let Sam and Dean go as God demands it and they get rescued.

This entire season especially after the Colt didn’t pan out, finding God was the only way they had of averting the apocalypse and Joshua basically tells them ‘sorry, no dice’.

But he also mentions other interesting facts about God that I didn’t pay attention to earlier like the fact that he is on Earth and that the amulet wouldn’t enable them to find him, which is an interesting way to put it because in season 11 we will learn that the amulet was basically turned off and thus doesn’t actually work the way it’s supposed to.

So we get that God doesn’t want to intervene. He feels like he has done enough which brings me to another realisation - why did he intervene in the first place why did he put Sam and Dean on the aeroplane, why did he bring Cas back?

The first one is easy to answer when Sam and Dean are in the convent as Lucifer’s cage is opening two things are clear, number one, an archangel going supernova could probably be fatal and since Dean and Sam are critical to what comes next having them killed does no good, number two, considering what had just happened no way was Sam going to say yes to Lucifer on the spot. So Sam and Dean would have to be broken down gradually like we have been watching all season, so even if God hadn’t interevened on the first count nothing major would have changed. But the second question isn’t that easy to answer.

Why did God bring Cas back? In season five, Cas has done very little to influence events. He could easily be written off. The problem is that when Cas came back I immediately felt it was because he still had a part to play but the problem is Cas doesn’t come back to do something Cas comes back because he surprised the hell out of God. Things become really clear when you realise that God is Chuck. Chuck who sees Cas rip up the ending and still be brave enough to stand up to an archangel. Chuck who sees Cas and is inspired beyond belief because for the first time the omniscient has found his blind spot and he is intrigued by Cas and that’s why Cas comes back because of the story he changed, the story that didn’t go the way it was supposed to.

But now God is done, after all what he wants is to see his favourite story end the way it was always meant to and Sam, Dean and Cas are no longer interesting as they increasingly fall into the ruts of his story. In this very episode, both Cas and Dean lose their faith and things look very bleak. So in God’s POV the story is going where it’s supposed to and he wants to play his part in making sure that it ends the way it is intended to go. Famous last words.

I can’t believe I have typed this much and there is still so much more to go.

In their trip to Heaven, Sam and Dean meet Ash and Pamela. Ash is amazing, he was one character I would have loved to see more of and he is still as cool as ever and it was amazing to have him back on the show.

But what I want to talk about is Pamela’s conversation with Dean. She tells Dean that the worst case scenario is Heaven and Heaven is all about reliving life’s happiest moments, so really how bad could things be. Even if the apocalypse kills a bunch of people they get to come to Heaven which is not so bad and Pamela definitely sees it as a better place. When I initially watched the show this made a lot of sense to me and I didn’t exactly get Dean’s POV and this time around I am totally on Dean’s side. Heaven is run by angels, you are in their control and more importantly the fact is that you aren’t alive. We can‘t just all kill ourselves even if the evidence points to the fact that Heaven is a better place because free will only exists on Earth, the place where your decisions can actually make a difference. Living beats dying even if Heaven trumps Earth and I’m on Dean’s side.

The most important thing to come out of this episode is the loss of faith. Cas’ loses his faith in God when it becomes clear that all the efforts he put into finding God were for naught and the righteousness that was the wind beneath his wings falls away. Cas believed that God wouldn’t want the end of the World especially when he brought him back. Cas believed he was brought back to stop the apocalypse and he puts all his efforts into it, buoyed by the fact that God wants it that way and now that hope is all but dashed as Cas crumbles under the rubble of his faith in his father.

The second person who loses faith is Dean. Dean comes to Heaven and sees two memories one of him and Sam as they spend one 4th of July lighting up firecrackers in an empty field and one of him and his mother when she is in the middle of a bad fight with John.

Dean’s heaven is memories of his family while Sam’s best memories are spending a Thanksgiving Dinner at a friend’s place, about living two weeks by himself and about the day he left his family behind to go to college. And as Dean comes to realise this truth he wonders whether he and Sam were ever on the same page.

Dean: Your heaven is somebody else's Thanksgiving, okay? It's bailing on your family. I mean, what do you want me to say? Sam: Man, I never got the crusts cut off my PB&J... I just don't look at family the way you do. Dean: Yeah, but *I'm* your family. We're supposed to be a team, it's supposed to be you and me against the world, right? Sam: Dean, it is. Dean: ...Is it?

What I found most heartbreaking is when Sam reminds him that going to Stanford was a happy memory because he finally got away from Dad and Dean reminds him he wasn’t the only one Sam got away from.

At the end of the episode when Dean drops the amulet that Cas returned into a garbage bin, the message is clear. Dean’s lost faith in Sam. The amulet is an interesting artifact in this context when they had faith the amulet was invaluable to Cas and Dean but as soon as they lose faith Cas doesn't want it any longer and neither does Dean. It's interesting how faith is the difference between something being indispensable and something being garbage.

I can’t believe I have talked so much and I still have more to say. This epsiode is a treasure.

So, I couldn’t end this post without talking about John. John is prominently brought up twice in this episode. Once when Dean tells Sam that their parents' marriage was only perfect after Mary died. This made sense. Every marriage has tough spots and this was a particularly bad one for John and Mary. But John loved Mary and after her death it was easy to remember the good memories, it was easier to put her on a pedestal and fight a war in her name, so of course their marriage was perfect, immortalised forever in John’s heart. But the thing that got me was when Mary, stressed after her fight with John, is soothed by Dean. Dean who is what four years old and Sam has this to say about this - I didn’t know how long you have been cleaning up Dad’s messes. This makes more sense especially in light of another memory. It’s the memory of Sam running away from his family on Dean’s watch and Dean can’t even verbalise what happened when John came back. This is one piece of dialogue that is imcomplete but the words that aren’t spoken are practically engraved on your heart and the pain is hard to overlook. Sometimes, it's easy to forget how traumatic Dean's childhood was while Sam got to rebel, got to be who he wanted to be because John wasn't the only one raising Sam, Dean was too and Dean taught Sam that he was important, he was loved and valued something that John couldn't instil in Dean.

Dean is broken in the aftermath of this episode and if “My Bloody Valentine” had aired after this episode Dean being dead inside would have made a lot of sense, because presently Dean is dead inside. He has lost all faith and their every chance at averting the apocalypse has been dashed.

[aluminiumfoildubai-blog]

Why Narcissistic Knight In Shining Armour Turns Out To Be A Loser In Aluminium Foil

It is OK to have a healthy loving relationship. Unfortunately, you may realize your partner is a narcissist. It is shocking and sad fact. It is far better to know the truth than getting stuck in lies till the rest of your life.

Narcissists are those type of people unable to love other human beings back. They sabotage and destroy their relationships. Keep your eyes wide open so it won't be too late for you to get out.

The relationship with a narcissist will change you. There is one proverb "When in Rome do as the Romans do". In other words, this person affects your emotions, your behaviors, and decisions. His mind games, manipulations and lies will brainwash you. You will accept to believe in many fake toxic beliefs about you and your life. Toxic memories about him will stay in your mind for a long time.

When you decide to go away, You may be completely broken in your new reality without him. You lost your identity and self-worth as you got exploited by his domination and abuse.

Narcissist leads their victims to lose their authenticity. You won't know who you are anymore because he was the only one telling you who you are for so long.

You may feel broken as he broke your trust and betrayed emotionally. In other words, he misleads your person to trust him completely. He leads you to tell him everything about yourself. You believed in his fake personality and fake intentions. That is the reason why you got manipulated to do, think and feel whatever he wanted. He just used your weaknesses and trust against you.

Click here to know more about the Aluminium foil UAE

Narcissist love power and control. He knows what women love to have a romantic partner. That is why they play a love scene. Often he will be the first one to use those three magical words of 'I LOVE YOU'.

He will repeat this over and over again until he gets it from you the same confession. It is only a confirmation for them that you got sucked in. Then you must worship and obey them Otherwise, you are useless to him.

He will also do everything to isolate you. He hates exposure by your family and friend. That is the main reason why he will separate you from them. You will stay all alone with him. You won't win with his never-ending mind games and abuse.

His plan is to destroy your life. He will entrap you mentally. It is a mind control game. He will offense you and degrade you. You believe that you are a worthless weak, unloved, unimportant creature. Nobody but he can love you so you must stay. If you rebel, he will use your dark secrets against you. If you want to run away, he will keep you financially dependent and mentally addicted to him.

When he will decide that you are not a good supply for him, he will leave you like an empty wallet. He will find a new victim leaving you wondering what happened. Yes, you have never been a loving human being to him. You were an object to him.

It is a very heartbreaking experience. There is a lot of grieve, painful emotions and traumatic memories. When you take a challenge and acknowledge your pain, you have a chance to reborn. It is a great chance to rebuild yourself, get strong, free and empowered individual.

[aeroknot]

i’ve always known this, but i just have to say it here instead of rambling in my tags on that last reblog, which reminded me of my feelings on this:

rey and finn mean so damn much to me as heroes 

their motivations... they are.... so complex; so reluctant to get involved and yet they so deeply gravitate to the center of their narratives in such beautiful and poignant ways. like, there’s a bit more nuance to my next point, but still: my general take on luke and leia and obi-wan and anakin and padmé is that they were all gung-ho, sabers-a-blazin’ take-the-plot-and-enemies-by-their-throat and RUN WITH IT heroes. they were not without pain in the long run, but generally speaking, they all decided early on they wanted adventure, they wanted involvement, they wanted heroism and liberty or death. and they are still remarkable for that, but like.... I can’t relate as deeply to someone that brave, or adventurous, or royal, or so “obviously destined” for heroism. 

so the hero arcs of rey and finn are a “messier destined” in my eyes and they are allowed to be reluctant, and that means so much. they go through journeys that, in my eyes, highlight way more hesitancy and fear, and stretch them and their views on their identities, and that’s invaluable to me to see on screen. the comparisons between previous SW protags and finn and rey as protags remind me of that quotation, “some are born great, some achieve greatness, and others have greatness thrust upon them” and like.... that’s a wonderfully hopeful, terrifying, and relatable feeling, especially when we recognize that trauma is also thrust upon us in life, and yet there are multi-layered responses we can have to the spectrum of these life events -- to all of what the universe presents us with -- and we get to see heroes who struggle with the myriad ways of coping with their pain and their greatness at the same time

one is devastatingly lonely and simultaneously attracted and repelled by adventure and heroism and what may be her destiny foretold by prophecy and yet?? her worldview of herself is so limited and small until others come crashing into it: i’m just a sand wasteland girl?? with people to wait for?? my life is scavenging and waiting and yet.... it’s intimidating that i dream; that when i dream i yearn for green, rain, roots, growth. if only she could just get a taste of what’s out there and see herself reflected back to her in the pools of possibility and the reflection of herself in a friend or mentor’s loving eyes and the fire of her own raging power in her enemy’s eyes. she was someone who felt in her gut she’s meant for way more but was too terrified to admit this to herself until all signs pointed to yes and the pain of becoming who she really wanted hurt less than remaining secreted away

one is tragically abused, traumatized, indoctrinated to hate weakness, vulnerability, and compassion, and yet his entire being thrives on cooperation and bonds-- and bonds cannot be nurtured without vulnerability and compassion-- and in fact, losing a close bond, his friend, is the entire impetus for his rebellion. so he became motivated by the very values they tried to eradicate in him. and he finds new bonds, love, partnership, friends, joy, even. home, even. he grew in the dark; he grew back in the places they trimmed. and he rebels even though he’s terrified. even though he knows the consequences. even though he probably can’t even register it as rebelling because he just thinks of it as survival. he’s running away from contributing to evil and then he’s running away from contributing to heroism and yet he fucking turns around, back into the snake’s pit, back to save a friend. to even maybe in some ways redeem himself, and to heal (and finn is a Black Man and this is a Big Deal to see on screen right now. he’s right. he is Kind Of A Big Deal in the Resistance)

so what’s at the root of their heroism is not necessarily just your classic case of The Good Guys being Bald-faced Moral Beacons, or a stubborn and ingratiating hopefulness against insurmountable odds. it is courage intimately tied to their own personal pain in ways they are aware of the entire time. courage against traumatic personal experiences, their hopefulness weathered by their knowledge of the odds of being torn apart. courage against survival instincts and preservation of self. courage against evil and oppression that has cowed them into corners and violated them not just in a systemic way, but very deeply personally as well. courage against heartbreak.

and i love tfa for it. and i love them for it. i will never stop loving them for it.

[ladyvialana]

a few more initial thoughts on vld s3:

First, I must reiterate: sniper!Lance!!!

Second: NEEDS MORE CORAN!!! (I mean, all the seasons need more Coran, but still)

Third: Sven! I am still cackling. ohmigod, that accent was the best, and pairing him with Slav?! I am convinced that every version of Shiro and Slav together must be amazing.

Fourth: I was not expecting Zarkon feels! Like, that was not at all on my radar! Goddamn.

Fifth: Blue paladins are always awesome (and queer)

Okay, so, slightly more initial in depth character thoughts and reactions next under a cut because this accidentally got really long:

Allura:

- best character story arc in the season, imho

- her scenes with blue in ep3 were amazing

- kind of wish we got more on her connection to magic/quintessence, especially now we have a backstory regarding the evolution of Haggar and (potentially) druids/magic in general

Pidge:

- loved her and Hunk bonding

- really hoping that season 4 has more to do with her search for Matt/the rebels since it was introduced and then kind of dropped

- her character arc really is kind of a waiting game, unfortunately, until the plot catches up, so while there were nice team moments with her, nothing major happened, so I’m expecting lots of awesome stuff later on

Hunk:

- we had a return of smart!Hunk moments! yes! I am so here for that! As well as the (somewhat) reduced food jokes (they’re actually kind of funny when used sparingly as opposed to every time he opens his mouth!)

- like Pidge, some great team moments, but no major character development, though, considering that Hunk and Pidge were the only two to keep to their original lions, it does make sense even if I’m not totally happy about it

- though, I do want to see more of his awesome piloting skills (that Shiro taught him!!!) since he’s so close to Yellow (I love that, I do, the scene where he basically refused to fly Black because he loves Yellow so much warms my heart)

Lance:

- he’s grown so much since the start of the series, I’m still crying (god, that scene in Black, and breaking up with Blue and then pragmatically taking himself out of the equation because he doesn’t think he’s the best soldier they have ... I’m gonna need more tissues guys)

- he’s just such a perfect XO - especially for Keith - like I genuinely love this dynamic (I fucking wrote about this dynamic because I wanted to to see it so much and here it is, playing out on screen, I am in heaven!!!)

- Lance and Allura’s developing friendship is everything I didn’t realise I needed until it happened. I need more of these two bonding, stat!

Keith:

- Keith’s struggles with leadership and living up to Shiro’s expectations was everything I needed from his storyline. Like, I love that he’s conflicted, that he realises he’s screwing up but also that he’ll do what he can to make things better (and he does! I genuinely like leader!Keith). He’s trying and he’s improving and, just as he starts to get the hang of this leader thing and maybe get his feet under him: wham! Shiro’s back (which he’s so happy about) and the team dynamic - their personal dynamic - has shifted so much that the friction is driving a wedge between them. 

- Seriously, I am living for this emotional drama, all the contradictory things he must be feeling (thrilled at Shiro’s return, upset that everyone is ignoring his decisions again after being unwillingly thrust into the leadership role, guilty that he’s resentful about Shiro’s return, so fucking insecure because the minute that Shiro does return it’s like everything feels like it’s running smoother and he had to struggle so much for every win, relieved that maybe he doesn’t have to carry this burden any more, but also maybe a little angry because he earned this, okay and maybe he’s a little proud of himself, but it just feels so wrong when Shiro says it because Keith feels like he’s nowhere near as good enough for this as Shiro, but Shiro’s not okay and the guilt is just drowning him!) ... damn, I need to write fic about this, I have too many thoughts and feelings

- I mean, I love everyone in this season, but Keith is due for a breakdown and it’s going to be messy and ugly and so many people are gonna be caught in the crossfire (and I can’t wait! ... I need this angst guys, it’s been building for so long)

Shiro:

- I am so fucking worried about Shiro, like you have no idea

- So there are two options here:

1. This is the real Shiro and he just went through another terrible ordeal with the Galra experimenting on him and potentially has put his team (his family) in danger just by existing and this is going to end horribly for everyone

2. This is not the real Shiro but he is clearly unaware of this and has all of Shiro’s memories and so he believes he has just been through another terrible ordeal with the Galra experimenting on him and potentially has put his assumed team (his assumed family) in danger just by existing and this is going to end horribly for everyone either when shit goes down or they stumble across the real Shiro

- both of these options are heartbreaking and (working with scenario 2 here) even if it’s not the real Shiro, I am already inclined towards sympathy because this is gonna end in tragedy and there’s probably going to be even more loss of autonomy and major trauma involved and it just makes my heart break for him (and episode 5 just broke my heart and, whichever Shiro it was fighting to survive, I’m rooting for him)

- regardless of what is going on with Shiro (real or not) he didn’t deserve this and is clearly so done with life and needs to rest and I firmly believe that Black recognised that Shiro was on the edge of breaking down and could not bring himself to pilot Black again and intentionally didn’t respond and Shiro feels so guilty about being relieved about not having to fight again (honestly, that final fight with Zarkon had to be traumatic, whether he is the real Shiro or not, those memories not being there is a very worrying sign about his mental state)

- did I say Keith’s breakdown was going to be messy? ha! Shiro’s is gonna be bad enough to destroy the castle and maybe a few nearby planets. That look on his face when he was in bed and Keith just assumed he was fine to go again? I felt like I’d been punched in the gut. That was not the face of a man who is in any way okay!!! (#giveShiroallthehugsandwarmblanketsintheuniverse2k17)

Other things of note:

- everyone’s going gaga over Lotor and the Generals and while I do think they make interesting characters, I haven’t seen enough of them to make much more of a judgement - though, I am definitely more of a fan of the Generals than Lotor (Zethrid’s my fave, she likes blowing stuff up and has smart ideas like killing your enemies while they’re helpless - she’s clearly read the Evil Overlord list unlike her fucking boss who does things seemingly for #aesthetic)

- seriously though, Lotor’s kind of bland and generic and the plot kind of twists itself up to be a little convoluted to make him seem mysterious and cunning, maybe he has a really awesome Xanatos gambit up his sleeve for the later seasons that will make up for it (maybe we will have actual depth to his on-screen persona later as opposed to just using his Generals to prop him up as interesting, who knows) (seriously though, what’s his genuine motivation? what was his relationship with his father actually like? can we actually see him interacting with the rest of the Galra empire/fleet? Haggar kind of has a point about his priorities)

- despite my complaints, I was genuinely excited by the plot of this season. Yay for exciting sci-fi!

- loved seeing the original Paladin backstory

- again, I was not expecting Zarkon feels - I was definitely not expecting Zarkon/Haggar feels (or that their pre-evil relationship would actually be quite sweet?!)

- Alfor’s a darling and such a nerd, I love it

- baby Allura is the cutest ever, I imagine that Coran was completely smitten the first time he laid eyes on her (the entire universe was, tbh)

And finally, one of my favourite aspects of the season - the development of Keith and Lance’s relationship:

- aaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- they’re just so supportive of each other, and they look to each other for guidance, and they pay attention to what the other is saying, and their teasing is kind of fond now, and they had actual scenes about emotions together

- I’m just ... I’m fine, completely fine, I’m always so happy I float near the ceiling when the two of them interact on screen, this is totally normal

- (*whispers* season 3 reaction fics! *squee!*)

In conclusion: Whoo! Bring on season 4!

(I am now going back to rewatch the whole season again before bed)