#and write some thank you cards
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today is the day i get back into piano
#today i promise#and wash my hair#and put away all my things from the trip#and organise my drawers#and clean my room#and write some thank you cards#and get started with essays#......#maybe not#vee rambles
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When talking about Boothill's drink order in 2.6, like. Hoyo could have just glossed it over and described it as "a few" or "several" drinks. They didn't bother to program in the actual glasses or anything- it's not like any of us were gonna count them and notice if they put in the wrong amount.
But they specifically chose the number seven, and if it IS just coincidence, it is a very very fun one.
Hsr is also known to make tarot card references- we had the online event shortly before Penacony's release, I'm pretty sure there's at least a couple simulated universe occurrences and a curio, and then Black Swan's Everything.
The Seven of Cups is a card about dreams and making choices when you have multiple options it front of you. It represents resisting self-deception and false dreams, and not letting yourself be charmed by hallucinations. It is a warning to carefully consider what is real vs what is not, which is very important in Penacony as a whole, being the land of sweet dreams, and it becomes relevant to Boothill later, when Primon starts to fuck with his head.
It can also represent someone who is "deep in their cups," which is a more polite way to refer to someone who uses alcohol as a coping mechanism to an unhealthy amount.
I hate that this could be a serious comment on Boothill being an alcoholic to cope with how much horrifying trauma he's experienced...and I have to discuss it looking at Primon's ridiculous fucking face fjkdslajldk
The overall message of the card is to stand fast, keep a clear head, and make your decision. Which suits Boothill beautifully even outside of this patch, since he is the very picture of ruthlessness and straightforwardness- he is able to see that bright clear line between action and result, and he follows it doggedly! Everything he does, he does wholeheartedly and decisively! And we see it especially well when he fights through the partial regression Primon leads him into!
Straight and clear and sure as a bullet, baby!!!
#honkai star rail#honkai star rail boothill#hsr boothill#this took longer than I thought it would I'm like an hour past my usual daily post time#ah well whatever into the void it goes#there's also a Chinese poem called Seven Cups of Tea which I think merits some consideration. but having both in one post was throwing off-#the flow and the vibe of the writing so I cut it. Boothill is obviously very Wild West based but hsr is still a Chinese-made game afterall.#('This American shit is easy' - some Hoyo exec probably flsajflkdsj)#as a note I'm not very well versed in tarot cards OR western movies: so if anyone has extra insights to offer I'd love to hear it!#@ me askbox me put it in replies or tags- whatever. I am unendingly curious about all things and I love to learn. I wanna hear it!!#I always try to look up if things related to Boothill are references to Western movies before anything else...but it's really hard to-#-look up that shit if you don't even have a film title. i now know there's a movie called 7 cups. thanks google.#hsr#boothill#hsr 2.6#honkai star rail 2.6
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Been LOVING your lil magician folks recently please continue they're beautiful and very cute and cool and also very well-designed!! 🥺❤️
thank you for the kind words !!! im not much of a writer, but i do have some sort of story in mind for them.. theyre bitter rivals who end up as roommates bc of their scatterbrained elderly landlord lol
#idk how much of it im gonna keep or change but thats basically the gist of it ^_^#i dont know if i could ever write a solid linear story bc im very indecisive and tend to change things a lot so most of what i make ends up#very abstract or nonlinear.. just short drabbles or stuff that can be slotted into a general setting or premise#although i do want to challenge myself to try and write some sort of enemies/rivals to friends because i have a huge weak spot for that#dynamic!! i tend to be a little soft on my characters which i think has to do with me being a conflict avoidant person. so maybe exploring#this kind of dynamic will help me experiment with my sense of storytelling. although i cant promise it will be written well lol#im also thinking of making their story part of a bigger world so kinda like an omnibus?? i have another story in mind i think i can fit int#the same canon and itd be funny if theres like a bunch of wacky going ons between different apartment tenants nichijou style#but we'll see!!! thank you for your interest in these little shits!!!!#my art#myart#my oc#oc#presto#shuffle#house of cards#oc talk#ask#doodles#yapping
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wait they nerfed knifegate???
#i was in the middle of doing the echo grind for that#i mean thank god because it made me hate what is otherwise a very cool ambition#they all have grinds but echo grinds always feel the worst#and that one was like how would you like to not play the game at all for months#the only other thing in ambitions that has been anywhere near as frustrating#is all the card draws you need for hearts desire#yeah yeah it's a card game i get it#but when that translates to waiting to draw a card for two weeks#and it's hard to do other stuff while you wait without ducking in and out of storylets constantly#it's just like.... why#dreamgate was kind of the ultimate culmination of that#light fingers and bag a legend did not ever make me want to put down the game and say nah#the writing for all of them is so good it's just some of the mechanics are aaaahhhhhh#fallen london#flmp#mp#i have enough echoes already with the nerf this feels weird
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Hi hello I watched all of carmilla in a weekend when I was 17 because a student teacher who in retrospect I had a bit of a crush on mentioned that she knew one of the actresses. also I am pretty invested in all your recent vampire stuff because I watched iwtv in 2 days last week because your edit intrigued me
oh hiiii 🫶 thank you for indulging me. thats so cool that you watched iwtv! did it live up to the expectation?
i also watched carmilla at 17! or like, 17-19. i found it when s2 had just started and followed it to the end. did something permanent to my brain but i think it was a good thing. on rewatch now im like, i was right to like this. like it's a solid show, it's good. it has its flaws obviously but it's well written, the emotional moments still get me, i can see why i liked it and i still like it now even when it's not anymore, you know, meeting every need that baby gay me didnt even know they had
what it doesnt reaallyy do though - i dont remember if i posted abt this or if i left it in my drafts but - is explore vampirism as a concept. their subject matter is more lesbianism than vampirism. which is great! thats what they wanted to do and they did it and it's very good. but reading interview with the vampire the book rn im realising how much potential vampires have to be metaphors for like so many things and i started wondering like 'wait, did carmilla just not really engage with it or did it all go over my head'. but it just didnt really engage with it all that much. which again is fine bc that wasnt what they were doing. im glad they were more about the lesbianism than the vampirism
but there's this interesting difference in framing, because in iwtv they keep calling armand 'ancient' right? and emphasising how old he is. and he's like 500? and i was like 'wait isnt carmilla like 400?'. she isnt, shes 340, but still, thats getting there, you know? and we know quite a lot about her history, but kind of just the Big Events. when she was turned, the events of the novella, coffin of blood, silas. thats sort of what we know. but none of the long lonely slog of history day to day you know? with armand i feel like we can really feel how much time everything takes. how every one of those years is made up of single days. with carmilla i dont feel that as much. i keep kind of thinking about daniel, when louis calls him a boy in the first episode, saying "im an old man, with all the triggers that come with it"
because carmilla might look 18 (or mid twenties at this point) but she has lived all that time. shes also seen her native land be claimed by like a succession of ruling powers, right? like armand. shes been buried alive, like louis. when lestat is born, shes already 80 years old, shes lived a whole human lifetime, and the entire adult part of it shes been a vampire. shes lived through 1680-1870 being a lure. i compared her to abigail hobbs in some tags on a post, i dont know if youre familiar with hannibal the tv show, but i do also kinda keep thinking about that comparison
if youre not familiar, in the first episode of hannibal the murderer of the week is this guy garrett jacob hobbs who kills and cannibalises girls who resemble his daughter. and later on it turns out she was made to be his lure. like they'd go places and he'd sent her to the victims to make friends and maybe get them back to their home or smth. not sure if they specified all the details. but that's what carmilla did for mother. and in s2 we hear from mattie that while every couple of decades carmilla had to lure victims for the fish god, she also seemed to just enjoy humans between those times, right? like the doctor, gets lonely, gets a new companion. but we've only sort of got mattie's mocking word for it ("dont eat him, hes a poet! or her, shes got such a wonderful voice. or that one, shes just too pretty to ruin"), we don't know exactly from carmilla's point of view what she was doing or why. if mattie's talking about stuff that happened after the blood coffin, 1950-now, then i think it's a fair assumption based on what carmilla says in the s1 sock puppet show that after she'd figured out what the real situation was and what her role in it was, when she'd started trying to save girls from being sacrificed, that she mightve been doing the same trying to save people from becoming mattie's victims. it's probably more likely that she was just trying to find excuses to stop mattie from sucking someone dry rather than actually having like an aesthetic based morality. but it might be a bit of both. im still trying to figure out what her philosophy actually is, like i dont know what existentialism actually means ghkfjghkj but i will
i also found it pretty striking in the movie when shes turning back into a vampire she says like "this was supposed to be done, you know? the blood lust, the self-loathing, the sleeping tied to a chair in my own bedroom". thats what defines her vampirism, wanting blood and hating yourself for it (the third part is a joke/reference to s1 but also i think meaningful for how she sees her relationship with laura when she IS a vampire. little bit of that 'she will reject me for my monstrousness' shining through). and thats what defines vampirism for lots of vampires across the genre obviously, but i dont know, it struck me. we dont get a lot from carmilla's pov, we know a fair amount about her, but the story is always told through laura. we get laura's diaries, but just snippets here and there from carmilla, what shes thinking, how shes feeling
and i love that shes a philosopher. i love that thats how she seems to try and find something to hold onto, in a world that kind of moves around her, having been murdered, kidnapped, turned and groomed to be a lure on the cusp of adulthood, never having been properly loved (the relationship with her father wasnt good she says in s3, and her mortal mother i dont think has ever been mentioned (like laura's)). the only good relationship she seems to have had for the better part of 3 centuries seems to have been mattie, and mattie seems to love being a vampire. i can imagine carmilla just sort of going along with anything mattie wants to do just because shes so desperate for that friendship. not like, against her will necessarily really. but more like, she hasnt even had the space to develop her own will, you know? and philosophy lets you do that. philosophy gives you frameworks to understand the world and to develop your own opinions on it. and by the 21st century she seems to have developed those opinions, she has a sense of her own values, but shes also still stuck in that same situation. shes jaded and cynical in the face of laura's optimism and strong moral code a lot of the time in s1 because she feels probably pretty powerless. like she does what she can to save some girls but at the end of the day shes scared of her mother and she has nowhere else to go really, right?
i like how she grapples with that over the course of the series, in tandem with laura grappling with her black and white morality. she sort of jumps ship from her mother to laura bc theyve fallen in love, but then laura still stuck in her hero thinking refuses to see her monstrous side. not literally bc i think the biological vampirism never seemed to be a problem for laura, but morally. the having murdered. carmilla needs laura to see that and love her while seeing it bc the last girl she loved rejected her for being a vampire.
but you see her kind of swing back and forth in s2. she softens first with laura but then they break up and she leans back hard into the sarcastic cynic defense mechanisms, leans hard into "im a monster, dont expect heroism from me". but thats like, it's sort of learned helplessness i think. it's powerlessness, resignation. bc morally shes not a monster. maybe she doesnt have as strong a drive to help other people as laura does and is a little more selfishly hedonistic in that she just wants to enjoy her/their life, but she doesnt hurt people for fun, she never has. she just sort of didnt have another option for a Really long time. so she pretends she doesnt care. "im a vampire, this is what i do, this is who i am". but clearly from the way she talks about it when she turns back into one, she doesnt enjoy it
and i like how she goes even further in s3, where she starts swinging even more to the heroic side, bc she sees hope. shes like "wow if we kill my mother, i'd be free". theres hope and she becomes like a lot more active. and shes like that at the start of the movie too, a lot happier, a lot more relaxed, and then vampirism is back and bam depression gfhgkjh like shes immediately more gloomy, ashamed of her past and her self, retreats into herself
sorry i just took this as an opportunity to dump all the carmilla thoughts floating in my head on you. you didnt ask fhkghgjh consider this an open invitation to you or anyone else to come talk to me about carmilla
#just finished watching the movie and i had actually forgotten but at the end shes a vampire again!#they totally gave us a super great opening for more conflict to explore hollstein's relationship#bc carmilla sort of puts closure to her past by taking responsibility for her part in it and it makes her a vampire again#and laura is like 'dont give up on our life together' and shes like 'im not giving up on anything!'#and laura is like 'we're supposed to live and get old and have grandkids how are we gonna do that if you dont age'#so thats a great set up#im putting the fic im writing i think another 5 years in the future#bc the movie is 5 years from the end of the series and im doing another 5 years so it's 2024#but theres so much opportunity to play there. theres conflict. tehres problems to solve. but theyre in a good place#i dont think they ever specify how vampires are made in this universe#therees some posts on carmillas blog where she responds to asks abt why she doesnt turn laura or if she would#and she just says 'you have no idea how this works'#but that was still during the series and the writers obviously wanted to keep their options open and their writing cards a bit closer to#the chest#but at this point you could make laura a vampire#you could explore that. see how they both feel abt that. would bea difficult decision#theyre also not married yet in the movie#they celebrate carmilla's 'rebirthday' where she turned human again#you could do a thing where they turn laura on that same day. sort of make that their wedding#not an easy decision i think. i think it would take a lot of discussion to get them there but not impossible#and would be fun to explore. both their feelings abt all that. and like anotehr 5 years in the future where they are in their lives#idk idk. brainstorming#thanks for giving me an opportunity to infodump a little :)#carmillaposting
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i feel it's so fucking stupid and ungrateful but it still hurts a little when someone gifts me something i just don't like. i don't know. i know it's dumb and inaccurate to astrain that much meaning to a simple gift, but it feels kinda like they don't know me. i guess it feels like people don't see me, like a reminder that the person i reflect and the person i feel like are incredibly different.
#two fairly recent examples jump to mind#last year my class did a secret santa#the guy who got my name barely knew me so instead he asked our litterature teacher for tips#i was doing an effort to participate a lot in her classes and discuss stuff and i felt like she was an adult i could really trust#and adult who Gets It#and she picked just. the wrong gift. a classical philosophy essay.#stuff i hate reading. stuff i hate thinking about.#i said thank you to both of them and tried to read it during christmas break still. but i was right. i hated it.#and this year's christmas#recently i tried patching things up with my parents and we are a lot more communicative now#so they've opened up that my demand not to receive any gifts was painful to them#so we had an agreement: we write open-hearted letters to each other on christmas.#and they can gift me something if they'd like but no pressure if they don't find anything they feel would be a good gift#bc i myself opened up about the whole ''inaccurate gift'' thing being one of the reasons i dislike receiving stuff#and guess what. christmas comes. they got me a printed card from an artist whose work we saw at a local art thing earlier that year.#that artist does mainly either plants or nice architecture. stuff i love.#they picked the ONE work of hers that doesn't look like that. some reinterpretation of the great wave of kanagawa#a piece which i dislike with a passion for aesthetic reasons#i had promised i'd be honest if their gift missed the mark but tbh i couldn't. it's just an aesthetic thing it's completely begnin.#it's not like they spent lots or tried to pick something that was USEFUL#so i smiled and the picture is hanging with other stuff in my room#and i thanked them and i can't express how genuinely glad i am we have a better relationship#but man i felt my heart break a little under the tree in that moment#idk#i know it's silly but it makes me feel weird. and cold.#broadcasting my misery#vent
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How’s the demo coming along? /genq (Sorry if this is rude, I’m just curious ^^’’)
NO WORRIES I DON'T FIND IT RUDE!! honestly it's been a bit slow, I wanna pick up my pace again and be on that GRIND like how I was cause that felt good!! I'm also planning to delete the game on ren'py since I'm having issue with some of the coding even though I'm following the tutorial exactly as shown so I'm hoping that deleting the game(which isn't that big of a set back for me, I really only had the title screen in there so far) and then just start from scratch cause I don't know if the game file is glitching or if I'm just REALLY bad at coding(though tbf I haven't coded anything since the required coding class in high school and I wasn't even using ren'py for that) Although my plans have changed a bit, I don't plan on going to college this semester(which my dad is NOT going to like so I'm really dreading even TELLING him), rather I want to focus on getting a job(which will still take up my time as well as having to take care of everything at this place) BUT hopefully I'll be less stressed and at least have more free time(I take FOREVR to do college assignments, I'm a really slow worker, I always have been) but I'm hoping that I get a job and make money and save it up so I can GET OUUUUUUT of this place which would lower my stress and give me significantly more free time. And then I wanna do trade school, I wanna use my own money, not my dads, if I'm out of here and use my own money I don' have to worry about anyone else's expectations other then mine so that's also less stress YIPPEE! Progress is slow but tonight I wanna find some music, which thankfully I already have an artist(Peritune) that I REALLY like so I'll just be looking through more of their stuff! Now that I have most of the scenes written out it should be easier to find music and backgrounds! Anyways long story short progress has been slower than I'd like but I'm feeling that motivation kick! I'll try to post more updates as well, sorry for just going MIA!!
#☕️-cafe sweet#🎤-asks#yandere visual novel#male yandere#yandere#visual novel#yandere boyfriend#yandere vn#It started out as a little break from writing and drawin cause my wrist was hurting and i felt drained#but then stuff just kept getting worse at home#im safe though dont worry just STRESSED LMAOOOOO#honestly though seeing people still being interested in Cafe Sweet is giving me a big motivation boost!#Thank you! I'll get more done tonight!#Also with money being mentioned i REFUSE to open up a kofi or a patreon#one i dont have a credit card#but two im such a slow worker that i have like nothing to offer like im not sure id be able to do monthly specials#and so id feel like im scamming people and i DONT want to do that#maybe eventually in the future but def not right now!#I also wanna redo Artemis' sprites cause i was NOT liking how they were coming out#which also made me unmotivated LMAO#I might fix up some of the beginning of the script tonight as well#i need a smooth way to transition into naming yourself and picking your pronouns as well as naming your cat
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So....TTPD is out.
...how in danger are we?
Yes. ✌️🤍
#some updates are spared#others are not#laughing in S&S D#laughing in DIOH#laughing in angst#laughing in MY PEN IS CHARGED BRUH#little did you know your home's only really just a town you're just a guest in#the voices in his head called the rain to end our days of wild#pulled him in tighter rach time he was driftin' away my spine split from carrying us up this hill#stitches come undone#i can fix him no really i can#trust me i can handle me a dangerous man#say it once again with feeling#how the death rattle breathing#silienced as the soul was leaving#old habits die screaming#So I leap from the gallows and I levitate down your street#Is it a wonder I broke?#change the prophecy#cards on the table mine play out like fools in a fable#theres so much more LMAOOO#do with those as you will#my fics#I am also debating writing an absolutely devestating oneshot just because I can#this album is lowkey my personality for the foreseeable future thanks taylor swift#you neVER MISS
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I saw several people wondering how to participate in this bingo event. so this is how it goes: you look through your recs, you fill out the card, and... you post it 😉
to make this even more interesting, every author that gets tagged in a bingo card is now challenged to fill their own. I said what I said.
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main character is a side character to fail better by orphan this is an unusual rec for me since the main character is camilla collins, and the main relationship explored here is jack/camilla. but really, I adore it because it's a rare example of an outsider pov on jack through the eyes of someone who likes him, and maybe sees more of him than he know. there's something very sad about jack at this point of his story, but his and canilla's awkward attempts to make something real of what they almost have are really endearing. plus: even if jack didn't fall in love with camilla, I definitely did.
still a WIP Increasing Engagement by always1895 I have a problem of hoarding WIPs and occasionally checking on them like I'm waiting for them to return from the war. this is one of those WIPs. there are two things I can never turn down, and those are social media fics and an enemies to lovers arc. just know my ass is sat down for whenever this fic is finished, and yours should be too. (*) if anyone knows the author's tumblr handle, please tag them!
short fic Patient as Pie by @edgarallanrose no fluff hits quite as hard as zimbits fluff. this short fic has jack being needy and affectionate and domestic, and it just makes me warm and gooey inside whenever I read it. which, you know, is often.
inspired you to write Two Things Only by @thewesternredcedar I'm going old school with this one, because whenever I think of a fic that inspires me I think of the summer I read this fic six times to get through my own fic. this may be in my top ten favorite fics of all time. it has endless amounts of pining, hilarity, silliness, and to top it all off, it's set during my favorite time to read about: right after graduation and before Y3. it does such a good job of nailing that jack and bitty essence that I just can't help coming back to it for inspiration.
bookmarked recently (...ish) say my name (and call me a liar) by @weneedtotalkaboutfic it may be cheating to rec a fic that was written for you, but uh, I don't care. this fic just hits all the right spots. it's smart, it's funny, it's mysterious, it's sexy, it's emotional. it has both super slow-burn and whatever the opposite of that is, thanks to a wonderful two-person-love-triangle. and if that's not enough, the real star of this fic is jack zimmermann and the journey of his sexuality and his happiness, which just blew me away.
BONUS: canon divergence But this place still stands, this place remains unchanged by @doggernaut I already have my bingo but I have more to rec, so. this fic is a really fun glimpse into a future that could've been, and it's supported by a wonderful ensemble cast (of both canon characters and realistic-feeling OCs). this fic made me laugh out loud and clutch my chest, and even though I knew where the story is headed, I couldn't wait to arrive there with it.
BONUS: isn't on AO3 lighthouse au by @appalamutte this is one of those tumblr snippets I wish I could will into becoming a full fic. just that one scene, along with the bonus background, made me fall instantly in love. historical au's can be hit or miss for me, but this was so unique and so intriguing, and (as already established) I can't resist a good enemies to lovers action.
BONUS: FREE here you come again by @ivecarvedawoodenheart honestly, no one rips my heart out of my chest quite like syd does. the first time I read this I was too emotional to think thoughts, but the second (and third, and fourth) I was just like: tell me everything about this. immediately. the phrasing lives in my head rent free? this short fic literally does.
#omgcp#omgcheckplease#zimbits#I just wanna stand on a podium and make a rousing speech convincing all of you to WRITE MORE FICS#and if you didn't fill your own bingo card until now: go rec some fics. now. thank you.#fic recs
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What is a Monday? A miserable little pile of obligations.
semester turnover restructure
generate/send out error reporting
figure out how to separate out unique counts
create polite reply to Massive Dick Move email
finish the bad book >:(
bò kho (not an obligation. dinner)
laundry
lizard bath
#yapping tag#I spent my weekend trying to sleep and now all my chores are due today and I wanna complain. grump grump grump whine.#the semester turnover restructure actually is a pet project so that part I like! I wish I could take my time with it though#the error reporting is. well it's easy to generate (it's actually running now) and it's tedious but uncomplicated to send out#but then I'm going to spend the rest of the day getting passive-aggressive responses from everybody#in a just world my coworkers would respond to careful itemized lists of all their fuckups with 'thank you Alexis you're so helpful#we really appreciate you flagging our mistakes two weeks before the system final-saves them forever into stone. have a cookie!'#but alas#if I'd been any less stressed and frantic when I first established the error reporting I'd have set up a separate address to send them from#write up some template emails and let the reporting all come out of the mythical 'automatic system thing'#--every 'automatic system thing' in our college is me or IT on my behalf. even the people who hired me for this don't seem to realize#if only I'd known from the beginning that nobody would ever connect me and my systems! I'd be exploiting the shit out of it--#the unique counts is going to be a headache. no idea how I'm going to structure the coding for it. might be fun to invent? we'll see#the Massive Dick Move email response also will be an invention. 'hello Mr Massive Dick I am karma here to smite you' but polite#the bad book >:( I don't want to read any more of but the deal I made with my friend is he sends me free books and I report back#we did not discuss a special 'get out of book free' card for when the main character is a godawful shit sibling. (should've done though)#beef stew is good! mostly it's on the list so I don't forget to set the timers#laundry and lizard bath can wait until tomorrow if they must but they shouldn't wait any longer than that. lizard and I will get stinky
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ok took a walk, did another big burst of work to wrap up the week, and did a reset/clean of the entire house except for the baby’s room. cleaning never takes as long as I think it will in my head… I should remember that but I won’t. I also listened to the tswift album in a more focused way but I still don’t like it much and am not sure it will grow on me. oh well! I do appreciate that she makes good art AND terrible art lol it reminds me that we all have both within us. mm okay what next. I need to make myself eat dinner… I keep skipping meals bc heartburn + baby squishing stomach but I think I can move into a summer salad phase if I try. the weather is soooo glorious maybe I’ll eat outside and finish my book about birth practices in four cultures.
#maybe I’ll just read tonight#maybe I’ll comment on some friends’ fics I have a backlog#I should write thank you cards but I think that might be a Sunday project#can’t forget that I tutor at 8am tomorrow
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#Laughing at the fact that I’m going to be writing my dad a thoughtful little Father’s Day card#that is just filled with straight up lies.#what id rather say is this#thank you for making me aware of just how fucked up you are#thank you for spending the majority of my life convincing me my mom was the problem#thank you for never showing me what an actual loving and caring marriage looks like#thank you for making me feel like I have to always apologize but then telling me to stop apologizing#thank you for never coming to any of my soccer games but then pushing for the fact that you always had to work.#you actually didn’t you just didn’t care.#thank you for being a dick to my brother and making him feel like he had to go to extremes to be a man#thank you for calling me fat after I just had a baby.#thank you for causing conflict in my life during a sensitive time in my life where I’m trying to step into a role of motherhood#while also being a wife and daughter and trying to find myself again#thank you for always getting your feelings hurt but never wondering how you hurt mine.#thank you for never holding yourself accountable for your behavior and your actions#thank you for constantly guilting me by implying that you’ll die some day and I’ll feel bad#thank you for saying that I wouldn’t have any of the nice things in my life if it weren’t for my husband#my husband told me that’s just not true that I’m a good person who deserves good things regardless of if I’m with him or not.#thank you for cursing me by saying one day I’ll see how it feels to be you and how my son will treat me just like I treat you#he won’t.#because I’ll do better by him than you ever did for me.#anyways#happy Father’s Day#plz disregard this#I’m feeling things and need a space to put them
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hihiiii fairy berry :3 i was reading flighty AGAIN!!!! and i was wondering if you ever thought ab a part 2 THIS ISNT ME PUTTING IN A REQ OR ANYTHING i just wanna know if its smth thatd ever be done yk no pressure i swear i love and am satisfied w flighty and i will happily continue to read it for the rest of my days
hi love! if the long flighty ask was yours, sorry i haven't responded to it yet,, i've been a little absent!! as for a part 2,, honestly i haven't really considered it yet? that's not to say it won't happen or anything, but it isn't a priority atm.
i know it's probably annoying to hear and i'm really not trying to shove my commissions down people's throats; but genuinely the best way to get full continuation fics definitely are my commissions, because i do those before any other fics i personally want to write. often times i don't really do part 2s (for stand alone fics) because i get ideas for another fic i'd rather do,,, and then any further fics that continue off of what i wrote just get pushed up and up and up and i forget about them a little :/
so i'm not sure? maybe when i watch season 2 jjk i'll be really inspired and want to continue flighty. but it's just as likely that i'll get a new fic idea and want to write that instead ♡♡♡
#i'm hesitant to say yes on these kinds of asks bc#i dont want to make promises i can't keep#i'm really sorry this is such a nebulous answer#and i know commissions just aren't in the cards for some people#and that's totally understandable#but because fics take 2-3 weeks at least to write;;;#it's either: i get paid to write something that person really wants#or i do that work purely because i really really want to yk?#♡♡♡♡ thank you for the ask though i appreaciate you soooo much#honey mail
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365 Days of Writing Prompts: Day 131
Adjective: Nebulous
Noun: Glass
Definitions for those who need/want them:
Nebulous: in the form of a cloud or haze, or hazy; (of a concept or idea) unclear, vague, or ill-defined; another term for nebular (relating to or denoting a nebula or nebulae)
Glass: a hard, brittle substance, typically transparent or translucent, made by fusing sand with soda, lime, and sometimes other ingredients and cooling rapidly, and it is used to make windows, drinking containers, and other articles; a substance similar to glass which has solidified from a molten state without crystallizing; glassware; greenhouses or cold frames considered collectively; a drinking container made from glass; the liquid or amount of liquid contained in a glass, or a glassful; a lens, or an optical instrument containing a lens or lenses, in particular a monocle or a magnifying lens; (British) a mirror; (archaic) an hourglass
#im hoping to meld together multiple interpretations of this into one piece#which might be fairly ambitious#(which isnt new for me but im not typically ambitious in this particular way)#but whether it works or not im very excited#on an unrelated note today has been an awesome day#i decided to take my gf to our local gameshop after work as a little surprise#we were buying some magic (or mtg if you will) cards each and the owner was checking our stuff out#he was asking us how long weve been playing and how big our collection is#and he gave us a paper bag 'to add to [our] collection' as he said#and i thought it was a grab bag situation so for clarity i asked 'all of it?' and he said 'yeah'#bro he fucking gave us a giant stack (at least three or four decks worth) of cards with six booster packs and a little life counter#the contents of that sack is probably about $100 (on top of the free booster pack i got out of the random magic card vending machine)#fucking wild#what an amazing day#i couldnt not document it here#cos this is lowkey my diary at this point 😂#thanks for reading#really thank you#writing#writer#creative writing#writing prompt#writeblr#trying to be a writeblr at least
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Wip asks! 5, 16, 19 w "help" <3
answering this instead for the current diabolik spiral fic, working title house of cards, just to keep things interesting and also because i have more of that written than only hope for me is you
5. are there any ocs in this fic? who's your favourite?
this whole fic is about a not technically oc but close enough, antonio my best friend, who is one of the guys who originally finds diabolik's boat in the ocean in diabolik chi sei but now he has a name etc. he's straddling the line between 'technically appears in canon unnamed but there nonetheless' and 'i made everything about him up so he's basically an oc'.
16. write the next 5 sentences and share
VERY early on this is definitely a long way off from being done but
There is a chance he's already too late, and nothing he does now will save him. But he has to try, at the very least.
It's a long, long night. Antonio stays standing so as not to fall asleep, rocks the child gently when he begins to stir. He is still worryingly quiet, but he's breathing, and bit by bit, the cold begins to loosen its grip.
19. where does (insert word here) appear in this fic?
the word being "help":
It is not their job to help people; it is their job to ensure they are not a threat to the island.
#neon answers#laviejaguardia#thank you!! <3#this is once again an example of me writing just for me but i do love this fic thus far#the thesis of this fic is what if diabolik was just lying in diabolik chi sei and what if there WAS someone who looked after him at least#in the early years. etc. more widely its because i thought for too long about who taught him to read and spiraled abt it#i still need to work out some of the plot details it's not perfect but it Is very important to me#like a house of cards#neon writes
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ughhhh I’m not feeling too good am feeling icky icky
#my throat is sore idk why 😭#I exercised a lot yesterday so my body is so sore and it hurts to move ugh#I can’t even cough because it hurts 😭😭😭😭#Chat i don’t feel great :((#Not even work was good I felt so off-kilter talking to customers#I GOT A MATCHA ICED LATTE AND IT STILL DIDN’T MAKE ME FEEL BETTER THIS IS FAKE 😭😭😭#Also i started to clean my bathroom and then i got overwhelmed for some reason and stopped#I need to do laundry or at least put my clothes in the laundry bin rn it’s all over my floor 💀#I washed my bedsheets (good) but haven’t made my bed so I’m just sleeping on blankets rn (bad)#Also i need to write thank you cards for my bday and my shoes are everywhere and i need to put my clothes in my closet 😭#AND I STILL HAVE HW TO DO UGHHHH#and I need to read and I want to plan for next weekend and I have to buy my friends a gift for bdays#And i need to organize my computer and i want to hang out with my friends and i need to beta read a fic#And i have all this stuff I need + WANT to to do but I literally can barely get out of bed :/#I just spend the day in my bed looking at tumblr on my computer then closing my computer to go look at tumblr on my phone#Sometimes i go on youtube and look at videos I want to watch so I add them to my ‘watch later’ bc watching them in the moment takes effort💀#Chat it is not ideal
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