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their relationship devastates me.
Tom and Shiv • Succession 2.10 — 3.09
#these gifs remind me of that one tomgreg fic#where greg's having this dark night of the soul about how he's 'not a good person'#and tom tries to comfort him by saying#'there are no good people#gregory'#you are surrounded by shitty people all the time#you just finally decided to drop the 'oh look at my bambi eyes#and face the inevitable'#and it just makes me think#about how tom and shiv behave horribly to each other#and to their subordinates#and i still desperately want better for them#for shiv to start as a political consultant again#and support the next jimenez with nate#and for tom to get out of this marriage#and find happiness with greg or honestly just about anyone else#and work just about anywhere else#and i know none of this will happen#and that they'll probably stay married#but sometimes i just really need to believe#that people in horrible marriages#who are horrible for and to each other#can write a new script;#they can't turn the clock around#but they can make different choices#chose different contexts#find new and more meaningful connections#because i just can't believe it's all one horrible#intergenerational cycle#i just can't see the world that way
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avenging spider-man #13
#good bedside manner: check your buddy is okay after you impaled him with a katana.#spideypool#not me. feral spideypooler. thinking it is so nice that peter asks wade if he's okay.#he has a healing factor. most people wouldn't ask if he's okay. but peter asks. and that's nice.#sci talks comics#i just really like these issues. i love how quick the flip is between wade having been hired to work against spider-man#to them just working together. and they're both so groovy about it.#like i don't know i really like that dynamic.#that peter doesn't see wade as a real actual threat to him at any time.#knows in his Core that wade actually never means him harm. i like to see that strange weird trust between them.#you never see that anywhere else.#just i REALLY like their dynamic HERE !!#yes i AM reading way too much into it !! but shut up!1 i based my entire personality on these two issues of avenging spider-man!!
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Aw man...
#Vent incoming wee woo wee woo#Goooood man I feel so. Stressed and anxious cuz of my job#I hate it. I hate trying not to cry every 5 minutes#I hate the feeling in my chest. It's like someone is poking really hard into it#It's almost suffocating#I feel awful. Every little thing makes me angry. I don't want to be angry at ppl who did nothing wrong. I don't want to be like this#I really wish I wasn't like this. Why can't I be more calm and normal#I feel like I need a good cry. But I don't have anywhere to go for that#When I'm at home I don't feel like crying cuz I purposefully distract myself from stress#But I do feel like crying at work#But ofc I can't cry at work#And even at the end of the Day when going home I'm too tired to cry. Plus it would look weird for other ppl walking by...#I hate this. I get all stressed durring work but then I can't let it out#I have work rn. And tomorrow#I'm just gonna have to feel awful until my Days off come#God. I really hate venting. I don't like ppl seeing me like this but. I don't have anything else left to relieve the pain#I just don't know what to do anymore#Where to go#Whatever. This feeling will go away eventually#It will come back ofc#I just wish there was a better way to ease the pain. But again. I don't have a place for that#So I'll just have to seat w these feelings until they go away#I'll try to keep myself distracted. Which will be hard cuz I. Am at work. The place which makes me feel these things in the first place#But whatever! I'll try anyways#I'll look at art. Or I'll think about characters that I like...#Save me fictional characters. Save me!!#Anyways. Vent over 🎉
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so california tiktok has created an echochamber with a bunch of californians saying “i just realized i have a california accent because i don’t say the T in words like mountain” and it’s been pissing me off because no one says the T in mountain but people in california like to pretend they’re special
#idk about anywhere else but all american accents say moun’n because pronouncing a hard T is just extra work#anyways sorry i just had to make this post because it’s been driving me crazy#‘omg i just realized i don’t say the T in costco 🤯’ do you think everyone else does?????
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HI I think I sent an ask a while back about having recently found TaTA and a) if it came off as trying to rush/guilt you. I am so sorry because that was NOT my intent, and b) I can hugely guarantee you have at least one person who will eat up any return, no matter when it happens, because I care about the guys so much 🥺 really looking forward to whatever comes next!!
Oh, I appreciate this a lot thank you!
Tbh it's a stress I would have regardless of anyone asking me about it, I'm probably the biggest one rushing and guilting myself on it. Which might contribute to some of the burnout I had...
My complaints are more about people who are demanding "more content daddy" or asking me if I'm dead or asking on every single post I make where it is... Wondering when it's coming back is completely reasonable, it's been a long time! but there's definitely a line haha
my editor also keeps randomly scheduling me and then saying "oh, btw you're scheduled to return in 3 weeks. Is that alright?" And I have to keep saying no, that's not alright??? And then dealing with that process...
I could write an essay about all the reasons it's not back yet, but that doesn't help me feel any less pressured, and it doesn't help you all get the rest of the comic any faster...
As of right now I'm scheduled to and trying to return october 21. No official announcement yet cause I have to do a lot of work in that time, but it's my official goal at least. When we get closer I'll be able to say for sure whether it's coming back on that date!
#basically the main reasons its not back are:#1) webtoon bullshit#2) sad about it ending#3) chronic illness and mental health#4) other projects I never had time for while it was going (books next comic prep pitches etc)#5) writing the rest took a long time#6) thumbnailing the rest (so i know it fits in the episodes I have! is taking a long time#7) finishing 4 months worth of episodes... is taking a long time...#its just too much#i could have rushed and made something okay#but I would way rather pause and make something amazing#and im telling you. holy shit it's so good#like it is so so so good its going to be worth the wait...#i hope. HAHAHAAHHA#but seriously im sorry i dont want you to feel bad for being excited about my work and wanting more of it#felixitous#asks#its hard to complain about the people crossing the line without accidentally lumping in people who are being reasonable#sorry about that#youre good#and honestly everyone on tumblr has been good so#its not you guys#this is why I've been posting way more here than anywhere else auaudjjdjjeje#feels way safer yallre way nicer to me
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The passage of time was sooo normal and kind to me this year guys qwq
#happy 2025#art summary#artists on tumblr#two of these are commisions and two are from artfight#I could not manage drawing alongside work and everything else that went awry this year qwq#yeah I made the scylla part three months ago and only manage to post anything about it now I#am so bad at this#I usually don't do new years resolutions but for this one I genuinely want to get better at promoting myself#especially since I'm out of work again#laid off like a true animator/gamer....#oh and that october mizi one is just an unfinished sketch I guess january akane having a bad time is also unfinished#never could manage to get it anywhere despite wanting to on account of the hair coming out reeeeally nice#I'm extremely proud of all my bigger pieces this year though#june and july ones hehe juri june and july#I never answered anyone on artfight and I feel so bad about it :'( participating on that was like#one of the last things I remember doing before time started passing normally again this year or well feeling better at least#and well as bad as it ended my time working was really great only routine that stuck around the whole year#and going out with my then coworkers felt really fancy and fun#I was able to save up a lot and want to use that to focus on personal projects this next year#......which is partly the reason I Need to study and practice getting better at promoing
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Seeing ppl here brag about how they use generative AI to cheat on their university work and its like. You're not learning anything. Why are you even there if you're not gonna do anything. You dont even have to be here.
Look the education system is unfair n shitty and often chews and spits it's students, and yea it's riddled with ableism specially for mental illness that wont let you work on homeworks like adhd for example, but the solution is not giving ppl degrees for doing nothing. Its like the ppl who buy diplomas for social clout n prestige instead of proof that you know about about an specific career. It makes the whole thing pointless. You just got a degree on how to write prompts on chatgtp.
#me rambles#idk im trying to not get into le discourse but. man that tickles me off#yea education often sucks ass and it needs renovations and better ways to check if it's students learned that are not the torment nexus#and like i would be a little less bothered if it was middle/highschool education bc ok teens that have to study yes or yes#(which again the problem is w the system and cheats were you learn nothing are not the solution)#but fuck. you're adults. you could be anywhere else.#n so many ppl going on abt work culture n shit but one of the main reasons ppl get degrees is precisely to show they're qualified for a job#sigh i know the fellas saying all that are just smug jackasses#who think they're super smart n beating the education system n shielding themselves with anti ableism language#and dont give a damm about anything im saying here#its just that education is important. (in any economic system too bc man they try to pull out the anti capitalism card)#anyways im getting to focused on this subject. imma go and read or smth
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ah. has difficulty sleeping then dreams of apocalypse i guess.
#so i uh; fell asleep again;#its all right. it felt very tangible though#piktalk#it was very fictiony in places but that matters little in dreams like that.#for some reason the sky just. stopped working. or started working differently i guess.#you could see every band of every time of day all at once; leaving a sort of faux secondary horizon in the sky.#(i do not do well with seeing the blank night sky; so i did my best not to look.)#the moon was uncomfortably large and vivid; and you could see it from anywhere. you could not see the sun.#evidently; they were preparing to use a large weapon in case anything could be shot at. we were in the range; so we had to go.#it was mostly everyone in what i assume to be a college dorm scrambling to get their stuff and leave.#by the time i got everything a lot of people had already gone. but we drove off anyway.#it got dark like evening; then even darker past that. my phone lost service and all we had was blind trust in the gps.#nobody else was on the road. it was very quiet. i didnt want to ask how long we had; so it stayed quiet.#it felt important actually; that id left something important behind accidentally.#i was very sad about it; but it felt very concrete. didnt feel like playing or imagining. there was this thought of#'well we wanted a fresh start didnt we? i guess thisll be it.' which felt; feels; very important somehow.#i do think its a little funny though. said weapon from earlier was called justitia. implied to be a pale blue bird.#not really literally. it was still implied to essentially be a nuke. it just looks like a bird from far away.#so. huh. goodmorning.
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staaaaares off into the void
#officially spiraling again 🙃#bad thoughts everywhere about my inability to be a human and fear of that never changing#everyone around me can make it work can have lives can hold jobs and not want to kill themselves#why can't i lmfoafksjdhfs#um. yeah. idk. i have counselling on tuesday i think so i'm tryin to just hold on til then#but i'm also out of my antidepressants and the pharmacy has gone over the max 72 hrs without an update on my renewal request#had to take half my dose today so i have half for tomorrow too#so i'm probably gonna feel even worse for the next couple days 🙃🙃🙃#gonna look at doing some writing to distract myself + focus on good things#but i promise nothing idk how it's gonna go#and i'll probably be quiet when it comes to dms even though i just started catching up#bc being social just sounds like too much for me to handle today. sorry ;n;#i'll be fine!!!! promise i'm not like. Planning anything. just needed to vent a little#and as always i feel the need to explain my absence from dms bc god forbid someone misunderstand me that's apparently one of my worst fears#and deepest traumas lmaooooooooo... fuck#sorry. SORRY. sorry for the negative crying on the dash i just genuinely don't have anywhere else to spew it until tuesday (':#━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ ooc ⋮ don't @ me.#suicidal ideation cw#personal cw#vent cw#negative cw
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you’re important to people you’re important to people you’re important to people you’re important to people you’re important to people you’re important to people you’re important to people you do matter you do matter you do matter you do matter you d
#i’m tweaking over nothing again 💜#vent#rune rambles#daily affirmations 💜💜💜#they aren’t working that well#jesus i’m a high maintenance friend#lowkey just don’t feel special to anyone 💜 LOL#there’s nothing about me that people can’t get anywhere else yknow?#i’m just average
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Man I really wish I didnt feel bad abt sharing Leo lore outside of tumblr. It is what it is
#id love to feel okay talking abt him in servers or when chatting w others but i have the like#well hes not the commander so he'll be considered inherently less interesting to others and also he isnt Cool Enough in general#tumblr is fine bc im really just talking to myself and people fan choose to interact so i dont feel bad abt it#but I cannot imagine trying to talk about him literally anywhere else bc im like well nobody wants to listen to That#but its okay Like I dont need to its genuinely fine it can just be a little wacky when im sitting there like oh#im sure am the only one who hasnt participated in the talk abt their own oc....#I made an off hand comment about Shipping rytlock and leo in vc and nearly walked into the ocean#things to work on......#Me: Okay even tho it was a short sentence that was way too much information abt ur canon time to never say anything ever again
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I wish mental health services were more easily accessible and certain mental illnesses weren't still demonized in the field
#still pursuing a bpd diagnosis#but a lot of the specialists im seeing online are all like#have you been victimized abused or manipulated by someone with bpd?#and im like :(#ough im not ready to have ANOTHER heavily stigmatized mental illness#but despite that i still do hope i get diagnosed#i think it would explain a lot#and really help me work through my issues#before it gets to that tipping point#it already has come close multiple times just this year alone#i just... idk#i want to be better i want to get better#i dont want to hurt people anymore. i dont want to hurt myself anymore#it sucjs it really does#sorry for vent posting again#i just dont have anywhere else to go#and i dont feel comfortable talking to people about this stuff usually#everyone tells me i can talk to them but.. idk. its hard to do that. so many things can go wrong. i dont like talking about myself#i like for people to have a certain image of me. prefer people not to worry themselves over me#it brings bad feelings and associations sometimes#which if i have bpd can be thhe cause of that i suppose. just makes me feel insecure? ig? guilty? makes me feel like a bad person#when people try to get me to take care of myself. even if its a good thing#idk im just rambling#nobody take this in a bad way or feel discouraged in fact dont pay any mind to this#im just spitballing#will probably delete later#monnie rambles
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I picked up my wip after like two weeks and I can see all the things I need to fix but the main question is still in the air. Do I add this softcore scene even if the contribution to the plot is like. 10%? Maybe less? Or I just take it out even when I really really like it... ª 😔🔫
#.. its just so Nothing but it doesn't feel like ✨vibing✨ but if i take it out feels like something is ✨ missing✨ god#im so close to eat snow and hope i find rock there#tried ree's advice to read it with and without it and BOTH THINGS FEEL OFF#im gonna Smash. my head against the table. someone hold me#im not being brave rn#THE WORST THING IS THE SCENE IS LOW-KEY KIND OF BANGER THAT'S MY PROBLEM#And i dont think i can make it work anywhere else... I could Try but id have to create something kinda similar to the thing im doing and no#this js the kind of of tragedy Shakespeare was talking about with the to be or not to be... hamlet my man. i get you so well#it's fine. i will make it work. i need to finish this. I Need To. Even if it kills me.
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sorry im really not a dragon age blog in any official capacity i just love talking to myself on here
#by talos this cant be happening again#i just have. a Passion. for discussing and dissecting the way marginalized people are depicted in fantasy#as well as analyzing appropriative worldbuidling#so you can see why this game has such a hold on me. there's a lot to talk about and i cant help but work myself up sometimes#and i dont really interact with fandom a lot for that reason lol (failed step 1)#but like im having fun. i like aspects of the game i like the characters & gameplay this is just part of how i engage#im glad people like my posts but please dont interpret me as any kind of authority on dragon age. or authority on anything really#and dont take my posts abt characters as me asserting my thoughts as Fact. im literally just saying shit. just my opinion fr#shouting it into the void here for lack of anywhere else to share it!#but i have anxiety now so moratorium on da text posts
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I drew this explanation post for why I was completely inactive for a week, but then felt too anxious and drained to post it, and subsequently disappeared for a second week
Two main blog drawings and one side blog wip later, I remembered I made this and still think it's funny, so even though I stopped being dead (TM) I still wanted to share lol
Brief series of events at work
^^^old, but I'm still taking it easy so posts on both this blog and my alt will continue to be scattered for now
#so for those of you that don't know; i have moderate combined scoliosis#my entire back is always at least a little strained so i have to really watch my physical activity#but i live in Tennessee where we have the lowest federally allowed minimum wage#so in order to pay for college i have to work in a package distribution company because it's the only place that pays well/has a scholarshi#I'm in the small package dept thankfully (bc spine)#but for the last three months one specific manager kept sending me out to a different area with the heaviest packages in the building#when i first disappeared it was because i was having trouble walking and using stairs lmao#I complained to that manager and it seems I'll be in smalls again for the foreseeable future; so I've had time to recover and am better :D#every day i didn't post after that was due to anxiety and a low social battery BUT I'm getting slightly better on that front too#i have been *very* aware of my spine lately though#the last time I got an xray was ten years ago and i wonder if it's changed since then... not that i can afford a new xray lol#also can i just take a space to complain about the US not using the metric system#so many packages have kilograms ONLY and i have NO frame of reference for that since we don't use kilograms anywhere else#''ooh wow 70 is a big number but surely it can't be that baD- HOLY SHIT THAT'S 154 POUNDS'' <- me all the time#at this point I myself will just switch to metric and make life harder for both myself and life around me out of principle
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If you didn’t make a Tumblr until 2021 then how were you in the Nevermoor fandom before?
I only made this blog in 2021 but I’ve been on Tumblr since 2013!! I was mostly hanging out on Discord though for Nevermoor because it’s easier to have discussions that way.
I finally made this blog because I needed a dedicated place to talk about Nevermoor and post fanart and theories and etc. where I understood the formatting. Also so I wouldn’t be bothering other people that don’t know about the series at all, lol. Nevermoorsource came later and is my outlet for sharing all the interviews and art and other things/info that I like to keep up with in one place.
The thing is that I am usually lurking anywhere. I’m in a Facebook group when I don’t even use Facebook. If you see someone in TikTok comments saying that people should read Nevermoor, it might be me. I even stubbornly tweet about it, despite the fact that there are about a solid five other Nevermoor fans on there.
#asks#I used to have a twitter quotebot! but Elon stopped functionality for those soon after I made it 😒#still working on figuring out an alternative#like a random quote generator or smthn#I just love nevermoor sooooo much that I always want to talk about it and am always looking it up online#several ppl I know have literally found me online because they knew I’d be talking abt nevermoor lol#also I love nevermoorposting on tumblr bc I love rambling in the tags <333 can’t get that anywhere else
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