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imaginedanvrs · 9 months ago

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cancer's a bitch

masterlist

natasha romanoff x reader

2.3k words

warnings: reader has cancer and there's no happy ending. major character death

summary: at a time you need her the most, Natasha is nowhere to be found

“The results came back positive. I’m sorry. The next steps will be to start…” You couldn’t hear anything past that. It became white noise to the thrumming of your heartbeat in your ears, an instant emphasis of your ebbing mortality.

You knew about all the treatments your doctor was trying to explain to you, you had been on a deep dive down the web about them every night since you first went seeking help about your suspicions. Now that they were confirmed, you wondered who you should tell first. How could you even begin to find the words to tell anyone that you had cancer?

That was all you could think about on the journey home. Natasha would be there and you weren’t sure whether to tell her outright or wait for the right time. You wouldn’t know how much of that you had until you knew how your body took to the treatment. Best case scenario, the chemo would nip it in the bud and never return. It would be a thing of the past before you could fully process it as a terrifying present. Worst case scenario… Well, it didn’t do to think about it.

You needed to talk to Natasha.

When you finally got home, your heart plummeted further at the sight of your girlfriend packing. You knew that the frantic nature she took to grabbing items meant that she had been called on a last minute mission and that it was probably urgent. You also knew that she could be gone for some time. It could be weeks - weeks you would spend relaying the difficult conversation in your head. Weeks you could spend without her there to comfort you in your crushing fear for your life.

“Hey, babe,” you greeted as you hung up your jacket. If her mind wasn’t so preoccupied with work she would have asked where you’d been.

“Hi. Sorry I know we had plans tomorrow but I’ve been called away,” Natasha told you without looking your way, too focused on filling her bag as quickly as possible. You sat down on the edge of your bed and watched the redhead for a moment, debating whether or not to ask her not to go. You had never done that before, nothing had been that important.

“You think you could skip? I need to talk to you,” you muttered, threading your fingers together to stop them trembling.

“I can’t skip a mission for a date, detka,” Natasha huffed. You swallowed.

“It’s not that,” you said with a forced chuckle. “I’ve just been to the-”

“Y/n, I need to go,” she told you pointedly.

“There are other agents.” You didn’t mean it to sound like a plea, to sound like a child trying to convince their parents not to leave them on the first day of school.

“It’s important,” Natasha said, zipping up her bag and slinging it over her shoulder. “There are things going on that you don’t understand.” That hurt.

“Natasha please,” you tried, not caring how desperate you sounded. Still, she continued for the door. Maybe if she had looked at you properly instead of kissing your cheek in passing, she would have seen the worry written over your features in bold. “Please don’t go.”

“I love you, I’ll see you soon,” she called over her shoulder.

“I love you too but I-” you were cut off by the apartment door closing in your face. “I’m not well,” you whispered. She was already gone.

There were numerous people you could have called to pick you up from your first round of treatment. It was also highly recommended. You were exhausted, but taking a taxi home was the easiest solution, because it meant you didn’t have to tell anyone where you were.

It had been a couple weeks since your diagnosis and Natasha still wasn’t home. You still weren’t sure how to approach the subject with anyone you knew, counting on your girlfriend to hold your hand through the process. But she wasn’t there by your side and she wasn’t there to take you home.

Wanda would have been a good person to tell. She was the kind of friend who would drop everything to be with you when you needed her. She would have picked you up. She would have pulled over to hug you when you began to cry silently in the back of the taxi. She would have figured out a way to call Natasha home but she couldn’t…because she was imprisoned.

The battle of Leipzig airport hit the news by storm, as did everything that followed. Half were imprisoned and the rest were either on the run or playing lap dogs to the government, leaving you alone. Upon hearing that your girlfriend was an outlaw, you were able to piece together that you wouldn’t be seeing her for a long time. Nor would you see your friends. You were deserted.

You collapsed over the toilet once you were home, bringing up the contents of your stomach as your weakened knees groaned in protest from the impact. They were already bad - your legs - having been the area the cancer was attacking, but every short track you made seemed to make the pain worse. So much so that you were tempted to let the exhaustion overtake you on that very bathroom floor. You just wanted to close your eyes in hopes of having a short break from your reality.

Instead, with a small whimper, you forced yourself up and towards the bedroom. The sheets didn’t smell like Natasha because you had had to wash them a few days prior. You had sprayed some of her perfume on her side of the bed but it wasn’t the same. It wasn’t her. Still, you clung to her pillow as if it was, imagining her strong arms wrapping around your frame tenderly. She always protected you in your weakest moments, except that one. Except the worst.

Weeks turned into months and things became considerably harder. The pain was progressing with the cancer, working its way deep into your bones despite the aggressive treatment you had. At the start, a bad day was not being able to make it into work. After months, a bad day was not being able to get out of bed. The treatment wasn’t working.

“We need to operate,” your doctor told you. You peered at the frown lines along his forehead, wondering how many people he had given that news to before you. How many people had sat in the chair you were in, listening to the doctor tell them their body was failing to fight off a biological evil? Were their loved ones sitting in that office with them, occupying the empty seat next to you? Were they waiting outside? Were they a phone call away? You should call your parents. Nothing buried the hatchet like telling your parents you were dying, right?

You didn’t want them though, you wanted Natasha, wherever she may be. She could be dead. Perhaps if she was, you would be together sooner than it would take for her to come out of hiding to see you just once. You didn’t want that. You weren’t that selfish. You hoped she was okay, better than you at least. But you were selfish enough to wish she would come see you, just once. It would be dangerous, stupidly reckless. There were no doubt eyes on your home at all times, waiting for Natasha to come back for you. That was why she couldn’t come. Yet you still couldn’t help but think fuck the risk, please just come hold my hand.

That was all you could think as you were wheeled into surgery and when the mask was placed over your face. You didn’t wish for success or recovery. You wished for her. You were naive to even try. She wasn’t there when you woke up and even though you hadn’t expected her to be, it still hurt to see the visitor chair next to your bed empty. You weren’t desperate for company, if you were you would have called your parents. You had always prided yourself on handling things on your own, even the burdens you could share with others. So no, you didn’t want sympathy, cards, flowers or visitors. You didn’t even care that you still had to get a taxi home instead of having someone waiting for you in their car. You just wanted a text from your girlfriend, to know that she was still out there somewhere thinking of you - caring about you.

Even after a year, you refused to give up on the dream Natasha would some day come home. You still celebrated your anniversary. You celebrated her birthday. You placed a present under the small tree for her on Christmas, leaving it there even after you took the tree down. You left the first aid kit on the windowsill in the bathroom. You always made sure there was a fresh pb&j sandwich on the kitchen counter when you went to bed. Even when keeping the apartment clean and tidy became too difficult for you, you ensured that anything Natasha might need, should she come home, be out ready for her.

After two years, your doctor refused to continue your treatment. It was causing internal bleeds. It was stripping you of energy you didn’t have to start with. It made you sick. You were entering stage four, something that didn’t always mean you were approaching the end of the road. But in your case, you were.

Then, finally, you received a text.

Unknown number: new jersey, tmrw. I’ll send you an address once you land -n

You blinked at your phone. You weren’t going to make it downstairs, never mind to the airport. There was a high chance Natasha had destroyed the phone as soon as she sent the message, but you had to at least try and find a way to say what you needed to.

Me: goodnight, see you in the morning :)

It was code, something you had come up with years ago. It was a text you had always dreaded receiving but had never pictured yourself sending. Why would you? Your girlfriend was the spy who’s life was always in danger in some sense, yet it was you preparing for what would come next.

You closed your eyes, content in the fact you had managed to say goodbye in some sense. It wasn’t the way you wanted, but it was better than nothing.

You awoke, two days later, to the sound of your window being opened. You opened your eyes but couldn’t raise your eyelids more than half way, adding to the poor visibility the night time provided. You only saw the figure when it moved, but you weren’t alarmed by the presence of something unknown no matter what it could mean. You hoped it meant you weren’t going to be alone when you went, no one deserved that.

“Y/n,” Natasha’s name pierced through the room. Your breath hitched in your throat but you were unable to answer. Your throat was sore and you hadn't had a drink in a long time. You didn’t have the strength to grab the glass on your bedside table.

Natasha turned the lamp and you really wished she didn’t. You didn’t know what you looked like, but the last time you saw your reflection you were greeted with someone you didn’t know. Would Natasha see it that way? Wonder where her girlfriend had gone? She had always been an expert on concealing her emotions, but her shock then was clear. Not just that, she was scared. You knew that feeling all too well. It had taken her place as the one constant in your life.

“What…are…” She was at a loss for words, you noted. She took a tentative step that allowed her to be close enough to see the tears brimming in her eyes. God, you always loved those emerald eyes.

Natasha brought the glass up to your lips and you managed two sips before turning your head away. “What do I do?” She asked, voice shaking. Your hand managed to find hers, linking them together with the intention of never letting go until you had taken your last breath. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered, squeezing your hand. You managed a smile. “I love you so much.”

“Love you.” There was so much more you wanted to say. How much you missed her, how you had waited for her to come home. You wanted to rush her out of the apartment under the fear she would be caught, but you also wanted to tell her that you had been hanging on for her, keeping the grim reaper outside your door until you were ready to take his hand.

“God I…” Natasha also had a lot she wanted to say. She wanted to tell you how not a single day went by where she didn’t want to come running home or at least send a text. How she regretted ever joining a battle that seemed so insignificant in comparison to you laying there. She wanted to tell you about her family and how much she had told them about you and that they had even promised to keep an eye on you as she continued on the run. She wanted to tell you that she was going to be at a loss without you, but seeing the exhaustion on your face, she didn’t want to keep you from your rest any longer. You had waited long enough for her.

“It’s okay. You can go now. I love you so much and I’ll never stop loving you. You’ve done so well and I’m so proud, you can go to sleep now.”

Natasha didn’t want you to see her cry. It took all of her will power to hold it back until the final rise and fall of your chest. She bit back a sob, watching the light in your eyes finally dim so that they could take their place among the stars.

#natasha romanoff #marvel #natasha romanoff x reader #black widow #gxg marvel #natasha x reader #natasha romanoff imagines #natasha romanoff angst

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moonlitstoriess · 7 months ago

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Across the Universe-ch.6 (Fenrys x Reader)

Summary: Y/n has everything she needs in life. A family, friends, a safe place she calls home and most importantly a male whom she loves. What happens when it all changes when Y/n finds out about the betrayal of her lover and her so called family? Well, ending up in Terrasen and in queen Aelin's court was not what she expected but what she will need to start her new journey full of surprises.

See masterlist

"You are not paying any attention."

Isolde's voice shut off y/n's overthinking as she turned her head from the window in the healers hut and saw the concerned female with a small jar in one hand and some leaves in the other.

"I am sorry, I just got lost for a minute. You were saying?"

The healer sighed as she came closer and put the objects on the small table near y/n "I was saying, this salve will soothe the pain on your neck but in order for the marks to leave, you must apply it with these Sylvan leaves. Their smooth surface contain wondrous magical healing abilities so smearing the salve on it and then applying it on your neck will take the marks in a day or two, depending on the severity of the injury."

Y/n gave her a confused glance "But I did not mention having any neck wounds."

"Oh yes because as you said 'A friend needs it urgently because she fell and her neck got marked badly' Hmm I wonder how is that even possible? Also let us not forget how you are wearing a turtleneck during one of the hottest seasons the kingdom has endured."

She smiled sheepishly and replied, "I was never good at telling lies."

Isolde smirked "I can tell. That goes to show how pure your heart is dear."

At that, the younger females expression became solemn as she sighed and again turned her head towards the small window "I don't know about that."

She felt the healer sit down opposite to her and put her hand on y/n's, caressing it smoothly "There is clearly something bothering you. It is not a good decision to keep it locked within yourself. I am here and willing to listen."

Y/n wanted to. She really wanted to tell Isolde or anyone who would listen really about all that was troubling her. Especially after what she saw last night in the place filled with crystals. But would anyone believe her? Did she even deserve to be listened to? So much pent up trauma, so many words, memories, revelations. She wondered if Isolde would still look at her with this motherly care written all over her face if she knew even the tiniest bits about her. Azriel was the only one who ever heard her full, raw and true story. Who saw her deepest and darkest parts. Who, in turn, showed his own deepest darkest parts. Who promised to love and cherish her even more now that he knew her fully. But in the end, all of those words of affection, all of those intimate touches, all of those memories were lies. He lied. Az lied. He left and all that remained of her was a broken heart and a broken soul.

She thought that she learned her lesson. That she would never make the same mistakes again. How wrong she was. After the shock she endured last night, y/n could not get any sleep. She even went out to the beautiful, spacious, white marble balcony that overlooked a vast green mountanious area with small lakes running in between. However, even that could not soothe her. Her last resort was going to the training ring and exhausting herself but even that did not work. Thankfully though, this time Fenrys did not show up and y/n did not think she could stay calm and not throw a knife at his eye if she saw him. What she saw in the catacombs brought all her buried memories back. Made her rethink her choices. Her past.

How was it even possible? She would never recover.

Because what made her fall to her knees after seeing it was-

"Y/n? You are gone again dear."

She snapped out of it as she faced the healer, who was now looking at her with concern "Maybe I should also give you a tonic against overthinking."

That made y/n giggle as she said, "Such a thing exists?"

Isolde smiled warmly "Not yet but if it means you will stop drifting off in the middle of a conversation then, I will somehow create it."

Before y/n could reply, the female continued "What secrets do you hide you poor child?"

"None of importance."

"Do not lie to me. I have seen your naked body. The scars and memories it carries is unmeasurable. Each of them telling a different story."

She patted Isolde's hand, got up, put the two products in a small pouch and said, "Maybe someday I will feel ready to tell my story. Today is not that day Isolde. Thank you for the salve."

The healer also got up and started putting other medicine's in small, wooden boxes "As you wish. But remember child, the shadows may cloak you for a time, but true strength lies in the light you choose to reveal."

After leaving the healers hut and putting the salve with the leave's in her room, y/n walked up the stairs to the library in hopes of searching more on the matter. An hour ago during breakfast, Aelin announced that they will all be splitting in groups to search for more information. Obviously apart from Yrene because she was busy with the book in her room. They took the next two hours to attend to their duties because after all, Aelin was a queen and the rest of them also had jobs to do. So that means after an hour everyone would get together again and spend their time searching.

Once she reached the large room, her eyes immediately landed on Eva who was sitting on one of the lounge chairs facing the large floor to ceiling windows and reading a book. She looked up and smiled when she saw y/n entering the room.

"Y/n! Do you enjoy reading?"

Y/n nodded as she came and sat down on the carpeted floor next to Eva "I have always enjoyed reading. Fantasy, romance, action, even history."

At that, the younger one giggled "Me too! I especially enjoy getting lost in the pages for hours. Forgetting the real world exists, just you and the words on paper that transport you to an imaginary world you do not want to leave. Ever."

Y/n sighed and said, "Yes, unfortunately the real world can be...cruel and that makes me wish that the places we read about would be real so I could dissapear there and never come back."

After seeing that Eva had a sad, almost mournful look on her face as her gaze landed past y/n on the window and the view beyond, she quickly tried to correct herself, "Oh Cauldron boil me! Eva I am sorry for making the mood so sour, I did not mea-"

"No. You are right. I was just remembering times where the world was cruel."

At y/n's confused gaze, she took a deep breath and said, "During the war 3 years ago, I was so scared. Lysandra and everyone I loved were fighting the Valgs and whatever other horrors Erawan was throwing at them. Lysandra and Aedion tried calming me by saying that everything is fine, that we are winning, but, I saw it for the lie it was. Everyday felt like the last. Like that would be the day they would die and I would be left alone. Again."

The poor girl was struggling to continue so y/n said, "Eva, you do not have to conti-"

"But I want to. This world of ours was not a good place y/n. Not for 10 years. I know my family has told you about what happened but not about what they each went through, their own secrets."

"I do not blame them. It is absolutely fine if they do not wish to tell me that. After all, I am a stranger to you all."

"Yes, their stories are theirs to tell. But I will tell you mine."

At that, y/n gave her a puzzled face "Why? You barely know me."

"Because I trust you. And even if I have known you for only a few days, I believe in you. I see you for the braveheart that you are, y/n"

Braveheart. One of y/n's earned nicknames. Did Eva know of it?

And so, Eva told y/n of her story. She told her of her time with Lysandra in Madame Clarisse Duvency's brothel, about how Lysandra gave her these scars to save her from an early fate of prostitution. At some point, y/n had moved from her place on the floor to the couch to hug the small teen.

By the time she finished, y/n was frozen in her place, processing the shocking information. She was and still is a child. How could they? What world were they living in?

Eva had no tears on her face. In fact, she seemed so emotionless when she was talking.

She took y/n's hands in her smaller ones and said, "I am beyond crying. Please do not pity me, I have had enough of that. Yes, those horror's will never truly leave me, but atleast I fight against them everyday. Their marks on my body get less and less. I am strong now. Aedion has begun teaching me some fighting forms. Yes, these scars will never leave me, people will continue to either judge or be disgusted by me when they see my face but do I care? No. Lysandra has saved my life. I shall never be ashamed of them."

This girl was not only smart but also strong. Stronger than y/n will ever be. Atleast she has managed to face her demons instead of hiding from them. And as they sat there in comforting silence, reading the book in Eva's lap while she was tugged safely under y/n's wing, she understood that at some point, she would also have to face her revelations.

An hour later, everyone was gathered in the sitting room. Aelin took a sip of water from her cup before looking at each one of them in the eye and saying, "We will be dividing ourselves into groups in order to be more efficient. Chaol will stay with Yrene in the palace, Lysandra, Aedion and Elide you three will be going to The Silent Sanctuary, that remote monastery is one of the few places that survived Erawan for 10 years due to its location which is why their ancient manuscripts and meditative insights could provide some form of guidance or hidden knowledge regarding the issue. Then, Row-"

"Why am I not with Elide?" Lorcan said as he stood up and faced Aelin. Rowan, sensing the threat to his mate, also got up and bared his teeth. "Lorcan I swear-"

"That is enough." Aelin said as she glanced between her mate and Lorcan before relaxing back in her chair. "The Silent Sanctuary is considered a holy place for its monks and sages and even if I am their queen, they still hold their own laws and values. Elide is going for sure because she has a way with convincing people to submit to her. Lysandra is going because that place is located in the mountains. Her shapeshifting would be essential for them. Aedion is going for extra protection."

Lorcan was about to protest again, probably with a stupid remark when Elide put her hand on his chest and said, "Lorcan, I am not a little child you can coddle all the time. Did you forget how we managed to get into the circus at some point? How we got jobs as actors and performers? It was all due to my conversational skills and acting. We need to do this so stop acting like a mother hen."

Clearly Elide was the only one to ever shut him up because even though he still had an angry expression on, he hugged her to his chest and muttered a small "Sorry, love."

Lysandra sighed as she put her head on Aedions shoulder "Finally, it has been so long since I shifted."

Her husband, clearly dumbfounded, replied "You were literally a bird this morning."

She slapped him on the shoulder "Yes but a bird is not a snow leopard. It has been a while since I was a snow leopard."

Y/n chuckled from her place near the window "I have never met a shapeshifter in my life. I imagine it must be fun getting to change forms whenever you please."

Aedion grumbled "Fun? It is not fun when I wake up in the morning to not find my wife beside me but some animal."

At that, there were a few chuckles while y/n full on laughed.

Aelin, after regaining her composure, went on "Great. Now that we handled Lorcan's tantrum," a glare from the angry giant directed at his queen, "I digress. Rowan and Lorcan will be going to the Riftgate Ruins."

At the confused expressions from everyone, she sighed as she continued, "I know, I know. None of you have heard of the place before. Except me and Aedion. Tell me cousin, have you been there?"

Her cousin offered her a contemplative look as he answered, "I have heard of the place and its legends but never got the chance to visit personally."

Aelin nodded. "Neither have I. But, that place holds remnants of a lost civilization that has apparently been here way before Terrasen even existed. Legends say they once connected worlds and realms and that's why, the place could offer clues to how the current threat may transcend boundaries."

Rowan, standing beside his mate and queen, put his hand on her shoulder, causing Aelin to look up at him "My love, you know I do not like acting too overprotective or doubting your choices but...why am I paired up with that brute exactly?"

Lorcan snickered "Not nice when you have to be seperated from your wife. Is it now, Rowan?"

Aelin ignored Lorcan as she put her hand on her mates and said with a smirk, "Why? I thought the two of the most feared and strong fae to ever exist could work together."

"But that one is not a fae now, is he?" Lysandra said with a smirk

Lorcan was about to reply with another useless comment before Aelin shut him up yet again, "Fae or human does not matter. He is still extremely skilled, warrior and feared. I need you both working on this together."

Lorcan had a smirk on his face as he looked at Rowan--who was still glaring at him--and then did a mocking bow for Aelin.

Aelin sighed as she put her fingers to her temple and continued, "Gods. Anyways, that leaves me, Eva, Fenrys and Y/n."

Y/n's heart began to beat faster after hearing a specific someone's name. She did not fail to notice how Fenrys also straightened from his sitting position on the couch. She prayed and hoped that she would atleast be paired either with Aelin or with Eva but not with him. Oh please not hi-

As if Eva could hear y/n's thoughts she jumped up and down while saying, "Can I please please be paired with y/n? Pleaseee-"

Aelin held a hand up as she cut the little girl's pleading off "I am sorry sweetheart, but I will need you with me. You and I will be visiting The Great Library of Orynth. Since you are very good with books, I will need you to help me over there."

Eva, clearly disappointed, glared at her parents, crossed her shoulders "Are you sure you are not taking me there because that is the safest place out of all the locations so far?"

Aelin gave her sheepish smile "Well....that may have also played a role BUT! I do really need your skills and alsoooo...you do not want to spend time with me?" she gave a small pout at Eva to which the girl sighed but hugged her tightly saying, "Of course I want to help you anddd spend time with you."

But y/n did not pay attention to their conversation. She did not pay any attention to anything as realization dawned upon her. No, No, N-

"Fenrys and y/n. You two will be heading towards The Oracle's Sanctuary. I know the ancient fools there will try to act like you two are below them and their visions but, they need to see the prophecy we found in the book. Their visions and foretelling regarding the future have never failed my ancestors and though I again, have never been there, I trust in those that came before me which is why I am sending you two there."

Y/n wanted to shout out her protests but Fenrys beat her to it "But why us? I mean what does she have to offer that will make it more helpful. Aelin, just send me on my own."

Y/n scoffed loudly as she glared at the blond male and said, "Me? You are judging my skills without even knowing me or seeing me in action? Believe me Fenrys if we get into trouble it will be me who will save your ass."

"I would rather die at the hands of our enemies than let you save me."

"I can fly."

"Not impressed. I can shift into a wolf."

"And do what? Run around until someone catches up with you?"

"You clearly have no idea on what MY powers are so stop acting like you do."

"How ironic. You are doing the same to me! You know what? I won't even waste my energy on a bastard like you. Just pretend that you do not exist."

"You little-"

"Will you two shut up or should we go and fetch some Mead-soaked Berries to eat while watching your banter?"

Aedion's voice cut through their increasingly agressive argument as they both turned to look at the rest of the room with angry glares.

Lysandra was fake coughing to try and hide her laugh, Aedion was smirking like a fool, Elide was hiding behind Lorcan so that they would not see her smile, even Lorcan had an amused expression on his face. Rowan had his arms crossed and both brows raised as he glanced between the two of them. And Aelin had an amused smirk as she said, "Well, sorry you two but there is no other options lef-"

"Yes, there is. Me and Y/n-" Eva stopped herself after a pointed look from Lysandra.

Aelin continued, "I need y/n because she herself is from a different world. Maybe somehow the seeress would be willing to submit more if she saw you-"

"So I am some object to be presented at a market for sale?"

"That is not what I meant. You come from a foreign world. You have wings, which no one here has, and insight into your world. The seer's in there can be....uncooporative if they wish so. That is why, you going there and showing the prophecy would be the best bet we have. Fenrys is coming because he knows those roads, don't you Fenrys? After all, you have visited them twice."

At that, not only y/n, but everyone apart from Aelin turned with a shocked look at the male as he shrugged and said, "I had my reasons. But as you said, they are uncooperative. They did not help me."

"Well, we do not have the luxury of time or second guessing. Everyone go get what you need, pack your essentials. Apart from me, Eva, Rowan and Lorcan you two groups will have the longest road ahead."

Y/n was about to protest when Aelin gave her look that said 'if you want to find a way back to your world, you must help'

And she was right. Y/n had one and only one goal. Get back home. The rest did not matter. They needed to find a way to get her home and to solve the threats coming their way. She can shut up and endure it for just a little bit more and then she would be out of here. For the sake of Prythian. Just ignore Fenrys and it will be alright. He is an uncultured prick who can not hurt her more than he already has. Just get it over with. Be smart. Be cool. Be levelheaded.

These were the chants she kept on retelling herself as she made her way to her room. She first changed out of her current clothes, applied some of the salve Isolde gave her, and then wore some practical gear. She did not know what road she and the-one-who-shall-not-be-named will take, but she guessed that it would be no easy straight path.

Y/n opted for a...you guessed it, a black turtleneck. Combining it with black, tight, leather pants, and knee high, black boots. She did her hair in a way that it won't get in her way and then began packing a small back. An extra turtleneck, a jacket, a flask with water, the salve Isolde gave her, and a few more items later, she went downstairs with her bag slung over her shoulder.

When she arrived at the grand hall, everyone was already there, busying themselves with the weapons that were scattered all over the place. Chaol was also there, although his wife was nowhere to be seen. Probably in her room, busy with deciphering the book.

She walked towards the table that had all kinds of weapons on it. She took a small, dark brown knife holder as she picked two, sharp ended, small knives. She also took the intricately designed bow and arrow. Y/n was always an excellent and precise shooter, being able to shoot her enemy from any distance and angle. She even helped Feyre improve her own shooting skills.

Just as she was about to turn around, her eyes caught on to brass knuckles. Does she really need them? She can punch quite well. But...it wouldn't hurt to have them increase the force of her punch. After contemplating a little more, she took the object and stored it in her knife holder.

Everyone was ready with their weapons. The brute or otherwise known as Fenrys, also had all kinds of weapons strapped to him.

Rowan and Aelin were having their own little moment while Lorcan was clinging and whispering somethings to Elide like a baby duck who just saw their mother for the first time.

Chaol gave them all a small smile as he patted Aedion on his shoulders and said, "Good luck. Me and Yrene will inform you if we find something." then he gave a look to Fenrys and y/n, smirked and said, "Try not to kill each other though."

Y/n smirked back "No promises."

Fenrys just rolled his eyes before Aelin and Rowan came forward. "Remember, if you can not find anything it is alright. Do not stal and waste time, just come back immediately. Be careful, all of you."

Y/n saw concern flash through the queen's eyes before they all started heading out. She felt Fenrys approach her before he said in the most annoyed voice ever, "Give me your hand. I will transport us."

"You mean winnow."

"Transport."

"In Prythian it is not called transport."

"Well, sorry to dissapoint you princess but this is not Prythian."

"Bu-"

"Give me your hand, y/n."

"We can just walk."

"Walk? If we walk there it will take us a whole day to just even cover half of the way. I will take us to the closest location near the sanctuary. But even then, the road ahead will be long but we will have to walk because it is warded and I won't be able to transport so better not to waste our energy walking from now."

"Then you go, I will walk-" y/n yelped as she suddenly felt herself being lifted up, bridal style, as the room around them started disappearing. That arrogant idiot! He did not even listen to her!

The second they arrived at the clearing, y/n threw herself off from his arms.

"You fool! Are you deaf? Who told you that you can touch me?!"

Fenrys, reigning in his anger, calmly responded, "You were wasting our time. I had to do it in order to get us here."

She scoffed and turned away from him. Fenrys tried his hardest not laugh when he saw her shock and wonder as she took in the place.

He meant it when he said the place is protected by ancient magic so strong, no one could break its wards. So, he brought them as close as he could to the road. But even from here, they would most likely spend three days trying to get to and from the sanctuary.

The place they were in was a small, circular, open area covered in grass and moss. However, this place was surrounded by a dense forest. When he turned his face to the right, he saw the road that they would take. He knew that path and what it held.

This ancient road winds through dense forests, where gnarled trees twist like guardians keeping watch over secrets long buried. Moss-covered stones line the path, their inscriptions faded with time and whispered tales of travelers who sought wisdom from the Oracle. As you tread deeper into the wilderness, the air grows thick with a sense of otherworldly presence, and faint echoes of prophetic murmurs seem to guide your way. Eventually, the path opens into a clearing bathed in ethereal light, revealing the towering spires of the Oracle's Sanctuary rising against the horizon, beckoning those brave enough to seek answers amid the swirling mists of fate.

He looked at y/n as he said, "Welcome to The Whispering Path."

Y/n turned back at him and asked, curiosity and a bit of fear evident in her voice, "We....we take this road? Are you sure?"

He smirked. The little fireball was scared. Good.

"Giving up already princess?"

She came closer to him and Fenrys was once again buried in her addictive scent. Although she was way shorter than him, she still somehow managed to look down on him as she said, "If you think this is enough to scare me away, then your only skill is fighting not thinking because you clearly are an idiot."

His smirk only widened as he pushed past her and began his way towards the path, not looking back. "If you say so, princess."

She will regret her words in just an hour.

He heard her loudly stomp her feet on the ground as she followed him.

Nearly two hours later, the forest path stretched endlessly before them, twisting and turning through ancient groves where the canopy overhead blocked out the sun's warm rays. The air grew cooler, carrying with it a dampness that clung to their clothes and skin. Shadows deepened beneath the towering trees, their trunks gnarled and knotted like the veins of the earth itself.

Each step seemed to echo softly, as if the forest itself held its breath, watching their progress with unseen eyes. The sound of rustling leaves and distant animal calls added to the eerie atmosphere, creating a sense of isolation despite their group's closeness. Occasional beams of fading sunlight pierced through gaps in the foliage, casting fleeting patches of golden light on the forest floor.

They pressed on, guided by the faint sense of purpose that drew them deeper into the heart of the woods. The Whispering Path seemed to weave its own tale, a narrative of mysteries waiting to be uncovered amidst the looming darkness.

Fenrys saw from his peripheral vision how she would keep one hand on the knife sheathed in her belt. How every sound, small or big, would steal a reaction from her. A gasp, a sharp turn of her head, knife in her hand. It was so unusual how he did not find her frustrating here. During their walk, they exchanged only two sentences. Are we there yet? and No.

But still, he, for some foolish reason, felt drawn to her because even if he did not show it, his eyes would constantly find her for a second, make sure she is well and then immediately look forward before she realizes it.

It was an hour after sunset when Fenrys finally stopped and said, "We are halfway there. We rest here until sunrise and by then we will be moving once again. Hopefully, by the afternoon, we will be able to reach the sanctuary."

He did not wait for a response from her as he put his bag down and began taking off some of his weapons.

"I...where or how will we sleep?"

"On the grass, by putting out extra clothing under our heads as pillow."

She gave him a confused look "Why couldn't we just bring sleeping mats or something?"

There she goes again with her annoying questions. Honestly why does he never have any luck? Why is it that he has to be stuck with someone as infuriating as her?

Just ignore her. Sharpen your knives. Ignore her so you do not have to snap back at her or take your anger out on her. Ignore her so you do not have to look into those hypnotizing eyes. Ignore her so...so that you do not have to look at that beautiful face. At those tempting lip-

"Hello? Have you gone deaf already?"

With a sigh, he looked up to see her standing there with her arms crossed. "Why take on extra weight? It would only waste our time. Just sleep on the ground or...have you never done that before?"

She scoffed. "Of course I have. I am going to find some wood. We need fire."

One secon he was sitting, and in the next, Fenrys was holding her wrist as he said, "No fire. This place is packed with creatures far worse than your imagination. The second they see the light coming from the fire, or atleast smell it, they will know that they are not alone so unless you want to be ripped into pieces and feasted on, we are staying in the dark."

She ripped her arm from him, gave him a glare, and went to take somethings out of her bag.

Fenrys sighed, tilted his head backwards and looked up at the tall trees covering the sky. It is like she insists on being a headache.

If he thinks he can order around he is about to be surprised. She is only keeping quiet out of fear for their safety. Once they are out of here, y/n will make sure to give her a piece of her min-

"What are you doing?"

She stopped. Turned around to look at him. Still sitting on the same spot, sharpening his knife and not looking at her. Or maybe he is pretending to ignore her. Y/n could not care less.

"What are you talking about?"

"Why do you have a healing salve and Sylvan leaves?"

He knows of these things? How? Did his injuries at some point also require these exact remedies? Did Isolde teach him? How is he even seeing her right now? She can barely make out his silhouette.

"You have definitely gone mad now. I am doing noth-"

She saw his head snap up at that. Saw how he put away whatever weapon he was sharpening.

"Do not test me y/n. Why do you need those things?"

"And who are you exactly? Last I checked, I do not owe you any explanations regarding anything that I do."

In the blink of an eye, he was right infront of her. There was some distance between them still. Thank The Mother. Honestly, he needs to stop this. She has had enough of not being able to know his next move.

He took slow steps towards her as she took slow steps back. "Come to think of it, why are you wearing a turtleneck? It is very hot nowadays."

Were those her hands sweating? The temperature here is cool so why was she sweating? "I wear it because I like it."

He was still walking closer towards her. "Hmmm, and I suppose it is also why you always wear long sleeves? What are you hiding y/n?"

She tried. She really tried to sound brave but her voice betrayed her as she said in a shaky tone, "None of your business."

That was it. He was right in front of her and she was pressed against a tree. Or was it a large boulder? She had no idea. Breathing became difficult. He was literally nose to nose with her. Why was it so hot?

"Atleast tell me why you wear a turtleneck."

"No."

"Very well then."

Really? He really just agreed? It seems so. He released his grip on her, turned around and started walking away. Y/n released a sigh. Finally-

In the flash of a light, Fenrys had her pinned against the tree again as he quickly pulled down her turtleneck.

"NO-"

But it was too late and her smaller hands were nothing against his firm grip on her. She could not push him away.

She saw it all in slow motion. His reactions, starting from realization going all the way up to anger was written all over his face as her bruised neck was presented to him.

She could only whisper a meek "Please,"

His nostrils flared, even in the dark she saw how his onyx eyes got even darker. His grip on her tightened as he released a low growl.

"Who did this to you?"

She could not answer. She was lost for words. Oh Cauldron boil-

"Y/n. I am not playing around answer the damned question."

"No, Fenr-"

"Who. Did. This. To. You."

"I can not tell you."

"And why is that?"

Because it is your close friend. Y/n knew he was only worried because he felt like he had to be her protector, like she was his job, his team mate until they left this forest and he sent her back to her house. He did not truly care for her, but even then, she could not tell him and cause trouble between him and his companion.

"No one of importance."

"Do not lie-"

She used all her strength to push him away.

"Leave me alone Fenrys! I said it is none of your business so go mind your own fucking job. I myself will deal with the one who did this to me."

"As you wish."

He turned around and went back to his side, lay down and turned his back to her.

For some reason, y/n felt like he would find whoever did this to her because what he said did not sound like he was letting the matter go at all.

Morning came once again. After having a poor breakfast of whatever they could find in their bags, they were on the way again. He did not speak to her and she preferred it to be this way. She did not think that after their small argument, she wanted to hear his voice.

Five hours of silence later, they reached what looked like another clearing. However, this one looked nothing like the previous ones. Soft, natural lights flickered amidst the foliage, casting a gentle glow that illuminated the surrounding area with an ethereal warmth. Fireflies danced in lazy spirals, their tiny bioluminescent bodies creating a mesmerizing display that seemed to guide them forward.

As they stepped into the clearing, the air hummed with a palpable energy, tinged with anticipation and reverence. Ancient trees encircled the space like silent sentinels, their branches adorned with shimmering vines that sparkled as if touched by starlight. A tranquil stream meandered through the glade, its crystal-clear waters reflecting the moon's silvery gaze.

In the center of the clearing stood the first glimpse of their destination: the Oracle's Sanctuary. Its architecture defied conventional design, blending seamlessly with the natural surroundings. Tall pillars of intricately carved stone rose toward the heavens, supporting a domed roof that seemed to embrace the sky itself. Soft, haunting melodies drifted through the air, sung by unseen voices that spoke of forgotten truths and timeless wisdom.

As they approached the entrance, a sense of reverence settled over them, mingled with a quiet apprehension. They exchanged knowing glances, acknowledging the weight of their purpose. The journey had been long and hard, yet here they stood at the threshold of destiny, ready to seek the Oracle's guidance and unravel the cryptic clues that awaited within.

"Why is this place so empty? I mean, shouldn't there be guards? or some servants?"

"The seers are not attached to worldly desires. They have let go. That means, it is only them and their souls, connecting witth their surroundings. Besides, they are too ancient and powerful to need any protection or help. Atleast that is what the books said."

Before they could go any further and reach the entrance, Fenrys stopped her. She turned her head around and gave him a puzzled look. "I have been here twice. Neither of those times I got any help. I never even saw their faces. They did not deem me worthy to appear apparently. So I should warn you, it is possible we come out of here with absolutely nothing."

Y/n did not know what it was within her that made her say "You are worthy, Fenrys. Do not let a bunch of old people tell you otherwise."

She saw the surprise and quick gratitude on his face before he turned his head sideways and said, "Well then. Let us hope that the third time is the charm."

Inside the Oracle's Sanctuary, every corner whispered of ancient secrets and the weight of prophecy. The main chamber was a symphony of light and shadow, illuminated by softly glowing orbs suspended from the vaulted ceiling. Shafts of daylight filtered through stained glass windows depicting scenes of celestial alignment and the weaving of fate.

The walls were adorned with tapestries depicting the cycles of the moon, the dance of stars, and the rise and fall of empires. Runes and symbols, both familiar and arcane, were etched into the stone floor, their meanings lost to all but the most learned scholars and seers.

At the heart of the sanctuary, a circular pool shimmered with a surface as smooth as polished glass. Around the pool, low benches and cushions invited visitors to gather in contemplation or prayer.

Books and scrolls lined shelves carved into the walls, their leather bindings cracked with age yet holding within them knowledge that spanned epochs. Dust motes danced in the beams of light that filtered through the chamber, giving the impression of a place frozen in time yet vibrantly alive with the whispers of prophecy.

"Well, this place certainly seems like it has been used."

"Yes. Apparently not when I was here though."

"So what now? How do we call upon them? Do we just wait?"

Fenrys shrugged but looked away "When I came here I...I begged. I hoped they would answer me but...this room stayed just as empty. And I was here for 5 hours."

Y/n hummed in understanding before turning around to find a way for these seer's to appear when she felt otherworldly magic fill the room.

Then, out of nowhere, in the dim recesses of the Oracle's Sanctuary, the seers emerged like living embodiments of the cosmos' secrets. Their forms are ethereal and ever-changing, blending seamlessly with the shifting energies of the sanctuary itself. Each seer appears as a shimmering figure of translucent mist, veiled in robes that seem to be woven from the threads of time.

Though their presence is otherworldly and their nature elusive, the seers possess an innate understanding of the threads that bind fate together. They move with a grace that defies mortal comprehension, their movements guided by unseen forces.

Their eyes, glowing orbs of iridescent light, reflect the constellations that dance across the heavens. Wisps of starlight swirl within their fluid forms, pulsating with the ebb and flow of cosmic energies.

When they speak, their voices resonate with echoes of distant galaxies and forgotten epochs, carrying the weight of prophecy and the wisdom of ages past.

"Y/n Y/l/n the Iron Phoenix. The Winged Fury."

"Fenrys Moonbeam. The White Wolf of Doranelle."

"Come forward."

Why did they all talk at once?

So, not humans then. Nope. Definitely not mortals. But powerful enough to kill them in the blink of an eye.

She shared a look with Fenrys before they both came forward and each sat on one of the cushions.

Y/n and Fenrys awaited in respectful silence, their eyes trained on the shimmering figures of the seers. The seers, in turn, regarded them with a knowing gaze that seemed to penetrate beyond flesh and bone, delving into the depths of their souls where destinies were written and fates were entwined.

Their gazes were trained on her. "You are searching for a way home."

Y/n sighed as she replied, "Yes."

"This world is in grave danger."

It was Fenrys' turn to sigh as he replied, "We know. Which is why we come to ask for your help. For a way on how we may bring an end to it before it escalates."

Y/n put her hand inside her pocket to retrieve the paper containing the prophecy when one of the seers said, "The prophecy you have uncovered foretells of a time when shadows will seek to shroud the light once more. It speaks of cycles and destinies intertwined, where the fate of worlds rests in the hands of a chosen few."

Y/n hid her shock. How do they already know what she wanted to show?

"The Book of Breathings holds a secret that transcends its physical form. It is indeed a key--a Wyrdkey, if you will--capable of unlocking gates to realms beyond. These gates are not merely pathways; they are thresholds that, once opened, threaten to destabilize the delicate balance of our universe."

A mournful expression passed over Fenrys' face before he said, "We dealt with this three years ago. Aelin closed the gates. Why are they opening now?"

The seers regarded Fenrys with a solemn understanding, their luminous forms pulsating with a subtle energy as they responded to his question.

"The closing of the gates by Aelin Galathynius was a triumph, but prophecy is often a tapestry woven with threads of inevitability and cyclical patterns," one seer explained, her voice carrying the weight of millennia. "The gates, once sealed, are not immune to the ebb and flow of cosmic forces. The actions of mortals and the machinations of darker powers can unsettle even the most fortified barriers."

Fenrys nodded, his expression grave. "So, despite our victory, the threat persists," he concluded, his voice tinged with frustration.

"The Valg are relentless," another seer added, her gaze distant yet focused. "Their thirst for dominion knows no bounds. They seek weaknesses in the fabric of reality, exploiting any opportunity to breach the gates and unleash chaos upon the realms."

Y/n furrowed her brows as she said gently, "But, if I am correct, didn't Aelin loose all her power? How is she going to close the gates once more? How is it related to her?"

"The prophecy speaks of a chosen few," one seer intoned, her gaze fixed upon Y/n with a depth of knowing that transcended mortal comprehension. "In the heart of a queen, strength resides, but it is not Aelin Galathynius, who holds the key to closing the gates."

She saw Fenrys' brows furrow in surprise, his mind clearly grappling with the revelation.

Y/n herself felt a surge of anticipation mixed with trepidation. "Then who?" Fenrys pressed, his voice a mixture of curiosity and concern.

"It is Y/n Y/l/n, the Stormbreaker," another seer declared, her luminous eyes locking onto Y/n's with a clarity that bespoke centuries of foresight. "The Braveheart who carries the essence of fire and fate within her."

Y/n's breath caught in her throat as the weight of destiny settled upon her shoulders. "But why me?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper. She heard Fenrys inhale sharply.

She must be going mad. There was no way she was destined to be the one to lock the gates. What about her going home? Her plans, they were doomed.

"The Book of Breathings chose you as its bearer, guiding you across realms to fulfill a destiny entwined with the fate of worlds. You possess a unique connection to the Wyrdkeys and the ability to unlock the gates that threaten to unravel the fabric of existence."

"W-what kind of abilities and con-connections?"

"You possess a unique resonance with the Wyrdkeys," another seer explained, her luminous eyes fixed upon Y/n with unwavering clarity. "The Book of Breathings recognized within you the potential to wield its power, to navigate the currents of time and space, and to restore balance where darkness threatens to prevail."

Fenrys, sitting beside Y/n, interjected with a note of concern. "And how does she return?" he asked, his gaze shifting between Y/n and the seers.

The seers exchanged a knowing glance before one responded, "The Book of Breathings is both a key and a gateway. It holds within its pages the knowledge to traverse the realms it unlocks. Through understanding and mastery, Y/n can harness its power to return to her world."

"And why must I close the gates?" she pressed, her voice tinged with determination.

"The gates, once opened, threaten to disrupt the delicate tapestry of existence," the third seer replied, her presence shimmering with a quiet intensity. "They are thresholds through which chaos and darkness seek entry. Only by closing them can the realms be safeguarded, ensuring the balance upon which all life depends."

"You have to decipher the Book of Breathings, harness its power to return, close the gates and with that, go home."

She was beyond frustrated now. "I don't understand. I DON'T UNDERSTAND!"

"You may be angry now y/n y/l/n, and you may be desperate to go to the home you believe in, but within the echoes of ancient whispers, home calls to hearts entwined by threads unseen. The Book of Breathings, a key to realms veiled in mystery, beckons you to paths yet unwalked. Mate not in the flesh but in the resonance of shared destinies. Greatness lies not in the blaze of glory but in the quiet moments where choices shape the stars' dance and futures intertwine."

It was Fenrys' turn to be frustrated as he said, "What on earth does that even mean?"

"Y/n y/l/n, your secret, the one you hide and cherish with all your soul, the one that you understood on an even more intimate level in the crystal caverns-"

"That is enough." She needed to leave. Now. Too much information was thrown at them all at once. To say she was pissed, would be an understatement. These old hags think they know it all, including her deepest secret. Besides, she did not need a reminder on what happened that night in the caverns.

The seers said nothing as they began slowly disappearing.

A look of contemplation passed over the Fenrys' face before he asked quickly, "Why did you not show up when I begged for your help?!"

A faint shimmer of light flickered where the seers had stood, as if they were considering his question before offering a response.

"Our sight extends across the tapestry of time," one of the seers finally answered, their voice gentle yet firm. "At times, the threads of fate must unravel naturally for destinies to align as intended. Your path demanded growth and resilience, lessons that could only be learned through your own journey."

And with that, they disappeared, seemingly leaving both Fenrys and y/n confused.

As they left the sanctuary, neither of them spoke. Both too lost in thoughts of their own regarding what they just learned. Y/n was grateful for the silence. Her mind was about to burn out due to all the thinking she was doing. So much revealed in one sitting. What on earth is she to think of it?

As night dawned upon them once more, they quietly ate their meals and layed on their sides of the grass and turned their bodies away from one another. But she could not sleep. How could she? After all that she learned it would be impossible.

"What will we do? What will you do?"

She heard his silent question but did not answer. She did not have an answer to give.

Instead, she whispered, "Why did you go there twice? Why did you beg?"

She did not think that he would answer her. But, to her surprise, she heard him sigh before saying, "The first time was for my two brothers. Gavriel and Connall. It was after the war and...and they both were killed during it. I wanted to know if I could trade my life with theirs. I...I believed they deserved it more than I ever could. The second time was a year later when I was going through horrible things. I was confused. I still am. I wanted guidance, I wanted help, advice, anything to tell me know who I am and how I can find my purpose in life again. But, as you heard, I was not answered. I stopped coming here since then."

Y/n turned around. "Fenrys, look at me."

He slowly turned around until they were facing each other on the grass.

She took a deep breath and gently whispered to him. "You are lost. Your grief is understandable. Your pain is understandable. What you are going through is understandable. We all have our own hidden troubles, nightmares or secrets that we must overcome on our own. But do not for one second, blame yourself for anyone's death. I may have not gotten the chance to meet either of them but, I know that they would never wish for you to want such things. They sacrificed themselves for you and your people. Do not let their sacrifice be in vain by trying to talk down on yourself. By trying to wish for a different end."

Her hands were itching to touch his handsome face, to move those few strands of hair behind his ear.

Fenrys gave her a small, sad smile. "What about you? The oracle said you had your secrets too. What is the crystal caverns?"

Y/n sighed as she turned around and lay flat on her back, staring up at the large trees covering her view of the night sky. "I do not know anything anymore Fenrys. Sometimes, I wish to be living in a tiny village or Island where no one knows of me. Where I am free of everything and anything."

She felt him come closer to her as the heat of his body started enveloping her. "Seems like we both share the same dream then."

For the first time since coming here, y/n genuinely smiled as she turned around and faced Fenrys or rather, his chest because of how close they had gotten.

But she did not care. Just for tonight, she would not care. So, she snuggled closer to his chest as the feeling of serenity washed over her, gently guiding her to unconsciousness.

What she failed to see however, was how Fenrys looked down at her with a small smile as he too, promised himself that this was just for a night. That they both needed comfort after all that they heard. And so, he carefully put his arm around her waist and hugged her closer to him as he too, descended into dreamland.

When morning came once more, y/n awoke to find herself in the embrace of the male she usually hates. For some reason, right at that moment when he was still deep in sleep, when the sunlight peeking through the dense leaves highlighted his face in ethereal glow, y/n felt nothing but care for him.

But, it all changed when he opened his eyes. Y/n immediately turned bright red as she pushed away from his arms, blabbering excuses, "Um...I-I....yeah um-"

But it was all cut off when a piercing sound was heard from above. They both immediately got to their feet as y/n had her bow and arrow in her hand, ready to shoot whatever it was. But it was after the second roar that Fenrys widened his eyes and ran forward. Y/n, surprised and confused, ran after him. They stopped at a place where the branches of the trees were not as densely packed and they could see a little bit of the sky.

From what she saw, y/n wondered if she fell and hit her head somewhere. Because what on earth was this? A large, black, lizard like thing with wings similar to hers flew over them. She heard Fenrys chuckle as he turned and looked towards her. "Manon and Abraxos are finally here."

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azrielslightintheshadows · 1 year ago

Note

Hello!! How are you?? I'm sorry for the difficult week... and thank you very much for answering me, I'm simply delighted! And don't worry, your writing hasn't been affected, it's still great! If she hasn't gotten better! And I'm glad you like the requests... I think they're silly🥹

But get better! And if you don't mind, I have one more request🤭 I imagine something where maybe Rhys went out and left the reader at home, but maybe, some of the boys, Cass or Az, stayed at the house, and they didn't know they weren't alone , so what, they end up attacking the reader thinking she is an enemy? And Rhys senses her fear of the bond and goes to help her? I imagine Rhys super angry, and protective of the reader, taking care of her and being cute...

(I read your recent Azriel story which was based on a movie, just amazing! I loved it!)

Safe.

Rhysand x f!Reader.

Masterlist.

Warnings; abuse, a bit angst.

Thank you so much. I hope you enjoy this too!!! I really enjoy your requests.

Being the High Lord’s mate could be very beneficial when you strolled around Velaris, most faeries didn’t even dare to look at you while others like most store owners gave you the best products they had, not because they fear Rhys, they do it because they love him. If you could take all the hate for him from the court of nightmares and multiply it by one million, then you would have the love for him from Velaris. You and Rhys knew that your whole life would change now so you decided to take things slow so you can adjust better and that is the reason you haven’t moved in together yet. Rhys would come over to your house most nights while the rest you would stay with him at the house of wind, recently though you both started searching for your dream house, a place that would represent both you and him and hopefully the rest of the family you will create.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

You woke up in your mate’s arms with your head on his chest and your legs tangled, you loved mornings like this so much. You pressed your body harder into his warmth and glanced up, he was awake too with a smirk on his face and those violet eyes staring back at you. The sun was hitting his eyes in a way that they sparkled and his whole face looked even more sharp.

“Good morning beautiful” his deep morning voice sent shivers down your spine.

“Good morning handsome” you replied and kissed his naked chest.

“I have to go to the day court today, me and Helion have some matters to discuss” he informed you and rubbed your back.

“But today we were supposed to go see the house by the Sidra” you frowned.

“I know but this is urgent” his voice softer than before, a silent plea for you to understand him.

“Okay…” you nodded and pressed yet another kiss on his chest.

“I will take Cassian with me so if you need anything find Azriel” he said as he rolled you on the bed next to him and got up.

“Okay I want to stay in bed for a little longer, I will ask Azriel to fly me home later” you smiled and pulled the blanket higher. Rhys chuckled and started getting ready.

“I’m leaving… don’t miss me much” your mate smiled and leaned over you to give you a soft kiss.

“I’ll survive” you teased him, and he scowled playfully before giving you another kiss and hurrying off.

You rolled over to his side and pressed your face on his pillow, his musky scent of cinnamon and cedar still there. You sighed in content and closed your eyes. Sleep came over easily and a few hours later you felt well rested, so you got ready for the day.

You wore a pair of leggings and threw one of Rhysand’s shirts on, the need to feel him around you growing as you inhaled his scent again. You strolled around the house to find Azriel, you couldn’t see his shadows anywhere. Weird. You thought and kept looking.

Azriel was sitting in his office trying to put some mission reports in order when he heard light footsteps. He glanced around and ordered his shadows to find out who was in the house. They didn’t come back, and this made him tense, he knew that Rhysand and Cassian were at the day court, Amren was doing some research so she spent all day in her apartment and Mor was in the court of nightmares handling some issues with her father. No one else could enter the house without him knowing. The shadowsinger reached for his dagger and cursed when he remembered that he placed all of them in his room in order to clean them. He got up and walked out, walking quietly as a cat down the hall and ready to pounce on the stranger. When he located where the stranger was, he jumped on him, sending both of them on the ground and in one swift motion he manoeuvred himself so he could bang the victim’s head on the ground, when he did a feminine groan filled the silence and he glanced down. The hair looked familiar, and he rolled the female on her back, a gasp leaving him when he noticed it was you.

You were unconscious with blood streaming down your forehead.

“Oh no no no” he cried out and picked you up hurrying off to find Madja.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

You woke up with a terrible headache and pains around your whole body. You squinted and noticed an unfamiliar ceiling and then it hit you. As you were walking around the house of wind Azriel jumped on you from behind sending you face-first to the floor and then he banged your head against it. You were too busy playing with his shadows to even realise that someone was behind you. You groaned and tried to sit up when rough arms pushed you back down.

“Hey it’s okay…. you’re okay… you need to rest” it was Azriel who spoke, and you looked at him. His eyes were red, his face swollen and his hair a tangled mess.

“I’m so sorry y/n I didn’t know that Rhys left you in the house”.

“It’s okay Az, you didn’t mean it. It’s not your fault I should’ve shouted your name since I was looking for you. You had no way to know that I was still in there.” You croaked and caressed his scarred palm.

“I feel terrible, and I deserve everything that Rhysand will do to me when he gets here. Please don’t stop him.” His voice was soft.

“No, it’s not your fault and I won’t let Rhysand hurt you” you said and squeezed his hand.

You could feel Rhys frantically pulling the bond and before you had a chance to pull back to reassure him that you’re okay the door almost snapped in half as someone forcibly pushed it open and your mate burst in. He was standing there frozen, his eyes wide as he scanned your form, and his power flowing out of him and suffocating everything. You shivered as you felt it, the power was raw and primal and it felt like the night came, like the sun would run and hide in fear. A low growl left his throat, and he marched closer picking Azriel by his shirt’s collar and pushing him against the wall.

“You fucker” he yelled and pushed him harder. “I’m going to fucking end you”.

“Rhys… baby it’s okay. He didn’t mean it it’s my fault” Rhysand didn’t budge. “Please baby he didn’t know I was there” you tried to get up almost falling on your knees by the pain and dizziness. This snapped your mate out of trance, and he rushed to you helping you back into the bed.

“Stay” he ordered and turned to go back to Azriel. You managed to grab his arm and pull him back to you.

“It’s okay y/n I deserve it” Azriel said and nodded.

“No you don’t, shut up and go. I’m fine. Everything is fine” you said and tightened your grip on Rhysand.

Azriel bowed his head and left, you made a mental note to find him again and reassure him that everything is okay. Your heart couldn’t stand seeing guilt tearing him apart.

“What happened? I felt your fear down the bond and then Azriel reached through his mind and told me he hurt you” Rhysand said as he cupped your jaw.

“I was walking around the house trying to find him and I got distracted by his shadows… I was playing with them and Azriel jumped on me, he didn’t know it was me though.” You explained.

Rhysand shook his head a low growl leaving him. “It’s my fault, I shouldn’t have let you in the house alone.”

“No, it’s just an unfortunate event, its no one’s fault” you whispered and caressed his arm.

Rhysand took you home and spend the rest days taking care of you, he wouldn’t let you get out of bed and even when you needed to use the bathroom, he would pick you up carry you there and wait outside to take you back to bed.

“Baby I’m okay. Everything healed I want to go out today.” You whined and he smiled sweetly.

“Okay, get dressed I have to show you something” he said and got up.

He picked you up, his wings emerging from darkness and shoot to the sky, after a few minutes you landed next to the Sidra. You looked around and you jaw dropped when you saw the big estate there. It was made from stone and marbles, with a huge garden and the biggest windows and balconies you had ever seen.

“Rhys this is beautiful” you exclaimed.

“This is our home. You will be safe here and we can finally start our family.” He smiled and wrapped his arms around you from behind.

“Our family” you whispered and leaned back into him.

Requests are open but delayed!

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fandom-lover2 · 19 days ago

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A Place To Rest Your Weary Soul

Chapter Two - In Time, It Will Feel Like Home

Word Count - 3168

-image not mine-

Chapter One - There's Room For Two

You watched the rows and rows of houses pass by in a blur from the front seat of Sue’s car.

You’d been in this car 5 times. The first was when going to your first foster home. The second was 6 days later when you left that foster home. The third was a week later, going to your second foster home, and the fourth was when you was leaving that home 4 days later.

Now, you were on my way to your third foster home.

4 days seems to be a record, you wondered if you’d break it this time.

If someone had sat you down two years ago and told me you’d be in the foster care system, you’d have laughed. If two months ago someone told you you’d be in the foster care system, you’d have cried, happy and sad at the same time.

You were 16, that was supposed to mean you’d be placed in some shithole orphanage or group home, where you’d have to fight every second of your life just to stay alive before you were booted to the streets on your 18th birthday.

Sue took pity on you, and was trying to keep you from orphanages and group homes, so was doing all she could to get you into a foster home rather.

The first had been too loud, too many children being fostered or the biological offspring of the people. You didn’t leave your room, not to eat or shower. You were too terrified to move. It had only been 3 weeks since it had all happened.

The second home was a disaster. You’d been there less than 32 hours before the dad had started screaming, yelling and threw a glass. Police found you in a park 7 hours later.

Sue said she realized it then, when she picked you up, you needed somewhere quieter, less people. A couple maybe, with no other children. A man who was soft spoken, gentle and kind and a woman who was sweet and calm.

Apparently, in her three days of searching, only one house fit the requirements, only this house didn’t have a woman, just a man.

“Toshinori Yagi. You will be his first placement. I really think you two will do well together.” Sue had told you when you’d climbed into her car after lunch.

You’d thought she was joking at first, but she wasn’t, and it made you furious. You had ignored her the entire trip, glaring out the window. She knew why you were removed from your mother to begin with, now she was leaving you alone with a man. And to make things worse, she’d gotten a call while on the way to say she was needed urgently and would have to drop you off at his place and then head out immediately.

You’d fought the panic attack silently the whole drive here, and now you were pulling to a stop in front of his house. God you missed my headphones, your music. You missed everything that was mine that you would never see again. You blinked away the tears, surprised you even had anymore to cry after all the crying you’d done the last 2 months.

You looked passed Sue at the house. It was nice, typical for San Fransico suburbs. The outside was all brick, two stories with a protruding bay window on the first floor and stairs leading to the front door.

A man was emerging from the door, a dark wooden door, and your heart dropped.

He was thin, dressed in basic pants, and plain white tee that hung loosely on his frame and… slippers?

You smiled when you noticed them, something so amusing to you that he’s wearing slippers to come greet you.

Maybe because the other two houses had been so formal, everything so uptight and business like. This guy was in slippers, in clothes that could pass as pajamas, ready to greet you.

Maybe this was just a façade, a false image of him being calmer than the others. All men were evil, loud and harsh, angry and dangerous. Slippers were just a weapon.

Sue got out the car, and headed for the back of the car, getting your bag out. Bag, like it carried anything more than a toothbrush and the only thing you managed to grab from your old life, Bluenose. The stuffed pony you’d gotten when you was 7 that you had slept with every night since. You couldn’t sleep without him, despite him being faded and falling apart. He was all you had.

No point hiding in the car, you’d tried that the first two times. It hadn’t stopped the inevitable, only prolonged the panic.

Sighing, you opened the door and stepped out, closing the door behind you. You met Sue at the trunk, taking your bag wordlessly. She shut the trunk and headed across the street to meet the man, and it was then that you realized how fucking tall he was.

He'd tower over you. No, fucking seriously? Did Sue read your file? Did she know why you were here? Why was she doing this to you?

They shook hands, and spoke for a bit. You stayed back, studying him. He didn’t seem angry, yet. His shoulders were relaxed, his hands (just one could cover your whole back) weren’t fisted, or twitching. He didn’t cross his arms. His face was kind, starting to wrinkle around his eyes. He had dark smudges under his eyes, evidence of either an iron problem or lack of sleep. You hoped that didn’t mean he stayed up late drinking. But he was still so fucking tall.

You were so ready to run. You’d find somewhere to live, some way to survive.

You were about to, gathering your strength, when Sue turned to you, and gestured for you to approach.

And then he turned to you, and he smiled.

It wasn’t forced, or practiced. It was nervous. He was just as scared of this as you were. He was as scared of you as you were of him. At least that’s what he was showing.

You prided yourself on being able to read people, have a sixth sense for them. Your instincts had been right about him, and about the first two families. Now, it was telling you this guy wasn’t… bad.

If you ran, Sue would send the cops to fetch you. When they did, you’d end up in a group home for sure. You wouldn’t survive a group home.

You took a deep breath, balled your fists and took the steps towards them. You approached slowly, keeping your eyes on him, on his every move. You kept Sue between the two of you. He stared at you for a breath, then another, then one more.

You didn’t know what to do. You hadn’t been the one to start talking the last two times, and you weren’t going to today either.

He moved then, slowly. Your heart still jumped, and you took a step back.

But he wasn’t moving towards you, he was moving down. He was bending down, crouching on the sidewalk.

You stared at him, shocked. Now, you were level. Actually, you were looking down to meet his eyes.

“Hello Y/n. I’m Toshinori. It is very nice to meet you.”

He didn’t hold out his hand, expecting you to shake it. He didn’t move, his hands on full display resting on his knees. He was still smiling, unsure and hesitant. His eyes were searching your face, looking for something. His eyes were beautiful, cyan and bright. And his blonde mop of hair was tied back into a pony, expect for two strands that framed his face. His features were sharp, but he didn’t seem strict.

Everything about him was kind, and warm.

You blinked, realizing you’d been staring at one another for a while. You met his eyes again, then dropped your head. That counts as a greeting, right?

“Right,” Sue spoke, pulling out her phone and beginning to text someone. “I need to go.”

The man stood slowly, taking his time. You balked beneath his height again, already have forgotten how tall he was.

“Call me if you need anything. I’ll be back tomorrow to see how you’ve settled.” Sue then turned to you, and she knew better than to try put a hand on your shoulder again. “Call if you need me, for anything.”

You nodded, keeping your eyes low.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” she reassured, then hurried down the path and back to her car.

You both watched as she drove away, and you fought the sting in your eyes again, the feeling hollowing in your chest, reminding you you’re being left again.

“You can come inside when you’re ready.”

You turned around, looking to the man. He had ascended the stairs, now waiting by the door. The offer was nice, no one had offered for you to go into their home when you were ready. It was always, “let’s show you around so you go do your own thing and we can get back to what we were doing, because you being here isn’t actually what we want”.

Noise across the street caused you to turn back to the road, away from his house. A family was leaving the house opposite his, a mother, father, a baby in a stroller and a son of about 2. They were heading out for a walk. The son waved at you, and you waved back. A few houses down from them, to your left, three girls, young enough to still have their hair in pigtails and pink dresses, were playing with a skipping rope. On this side of the street, some houses to my right, 2 old men sat on folded chairs on the sidewalk, a radio playing some sports commentating.

This place seemed ok. Safe enough.

Turning again, you began up the stairs slowly, looking into the house. The front door opened into a small entryway, which lead either to a flight of stairs that went to the second floor on the right, or a hall, that opened into the living room.

Toshinori had gone inside, waiting for you at the doorway into the first floor.

You stepped into the townhouse, wiping your feet on the mat just inside the door. You closed the door behind you.

“Have a look around.” he spoke again, softly, as he gestured further into his house.

You gripped the ends of your oversized hoodie, body beginning to shake from how long you had been tensing. You ventured through the doorway he’d had to duck under. One double seater, navy blue couch sat facing the flatscreen TV that was on a mahogany stand. An armchair, matching blue, was beside the couch, facing the TV at an angle. In the crook of the bay window, a desk with a laptop and a lamp, a stack of papers beside it. Just to the right of the TV, taking up almost all of the wall, rows and rows of books on bookcases.

You didn’t even mean to start walking, you just did, padding onto the white rug and towards the shelves. You started closest to the TV, and moved along, scanning the spines for authors you knew or books you’d heard of. Many you didn’t, but there were a few Shakespear novels, and other classic literature names everyone knew.

You felt him behind me, waiting for you at the end of the room. You could feel him studying you, and you could sense he was happy you liked the books. At least it was something we could fall onto as a conversation starter, if you stayed long enough for that.

“You are welcome to read any that you find interesting.” he murmured when you’d finally reached the end of your scanning.

You appreciated that, him speaking so softly.

The midday sun through the bay window bathed the room in a calm glow. Accompanied by nothing but birdsong outside, it was easy to forget why you were here.

Another thing you noticed while browsing the books, not a spec of dust on the shelves. Everything so far was neat, clean. But it also looked lived in, like a mess was allowed to be made.

The first house wasn’t like that. Everything was so pristine, perfect in its place. Nothing was allowed to be moved, toys in the basket were just decoration, the floor wasn’t allowed to be dirty. It was like no one was supposed to live there, just meant to be more decoration for the house.

The second house was the exact opposite. Hadn’t been cleaned in months, dust covered every surface where used food packages weren’t. You’d awoken to a rat in your room your first night. You didn’t sleep the rest of my time there.

Here, it was clean, but you could move things. A book sat on the side table between the couch and armchair, there was a used coffee cup on the desk.

Your skin didn’t crawl in this house. You turned back to Toshinori, who was leaning against the wall, still patiently waiting for you.

Your back had never been to him the whole time you’d been here. You always made sure to keep him in your periphery, just there for you to watch.

He smiled again, softly and natural and he slowly, so slowly, moved to stand again and continue into the house.

You followed him, through the archway into a small kitchen. A circular table sat in the middle of the room. There was a door too, leading outside. The kitchen had a big window, showing what barely classes as a yard outside, fenced in by wooden slates taller than you. A clothesline took up most of the yard, and it was nothing but grass, no flower beds. The tree from the garden next door to the right hang over to this side, providing some shade.

The kitchen itself was basic. There was a dishwasher in here too, and some dishes were drying on the rack beside the sink.

“You are welcome to anything in here. Don’t feel like you need to ask.” Toshinori spoke again, keeping as far to the other side of the kitchen as possible.

You looked around the kitchen, at the off-white cupboards and beige countertops. There wasn’t a theme in here, nor the living room. Things seemed to just be here, no thought put into it. Like they were just replaced when the previous one failed, but the new didn’t match the old. A white toaster, steel grey microwave, white refrigerator, red kettle. It was unique.

The curtains were drawn back in the kitchen, and over the next house that rose beyond the fence, the tops of Tokyo were just visible.

There weren’t any plants in the house so far, or pictures on the walls. Was it because he couldn’t keep them alive? Were there no people to be remembered in frames?

Taking one final survey of the kitchen, you looked back at the man. He moved on silently, moving back into the living room, then towards the stairs. He went up them, the wood hidden beneath the carpet that was a light grey creaking as he went. You followed after, using the guardrail.

At the top, there were four doors. One, leading to the bedroom that over looked the road, the bathroom in the middle of the rooms, the laundry room and then the room to the right, the one overlooking the yard.

He moved towards that door, and opened it. The sunlight poured in through the window with a small reading nook. Beside the window, a few white, wall mounted shelves held books. Below the shelves, a brown desk and matching chair stood waiting to be used, with three stacked boxes.

Toshinori made sure to take a few steps back, giving you plenty of space to move into the room. The bedframe was a pale green. The bedding was nice, a soft light blue. A closet was built into the wall next to the door. Toiletries were laid out meticulously on the bed.

“This is yours, obviously.” he spoke behind you, taking up a small space at the doorway, not blocking the exit. “There’s some clothes in the closet. Not much, but enough for a few days. I thought we could go out together, get some more.”

You nodded, moving to place your shitty backpack on the bed, before deciding against it and dropping into onto the fluffy white rug at the foot of the bed.

“This is yours now.” he repeated. “You can decorate it however you’d like.”

Like you had anything.

“Can even paint the walls if you want.” he added.

You turned to him, shocked. Paint the walls? Why? You were only staying a few days, maybe a week? And even if you did stay a little longer, wouldn’t he have to change it when the next kid came.

“We can go to Ikea, redo the whole room if you want.” he tried again, looking around the room nervously.

“No point when I’m only gonna be here a few days.” You hadn’t meant to say it so harshly, and felt bad when he flinched back at your words.

He looked at you for a few moments, then smiled again, this time it was forced. “You’re right.” Then he looked away and frowned. “Still, you should feel comfortable here, as short as you do stay.” He looked up at you again. “I’m hoping you do stay a while, and can call this place your home.”

You inhaled sharply, and couldn’t stop the tears that gathered in your eyes. That was the first kind thing anyone had said to you in a while. You clenched your jaw, because that had been stopping the tears from falling recently.

Toshinori smiled again, this time genuine and kind. “I’ll let you get settled. You saw the bathroom. All this is for you to use,” he gestured to the stuff on the bed, then pointed to the stacked boxes on the desk, “and you can open those up and set them up to your preference. I’m not very good with all this new technology.” he confessed.

You forced a half smile for his sake, then dropped your gaze again.

Can you just leave already?

He picked up on my silent plea, and began moving away from the doorway. “Right, well I’ll be downstairs if you need anything. Get settled, take some time. And Y/n?”

You flinched at your name, but forced yourself to meet his gaze.

“It’s good to have you here.” And then he was turning and padding down the stairs.

Once you were sure he was on the ground floor, and wasn’t coming back, you tiptoed over to the bedroom door and closed it as quietly as possible.

Then, you dropped down onto the floor, your back against the bed, and began to sob, your throat burning as you fought to keep silent.

@thoraeth @sharkteemth

#all might x daughter reader #all might x oc #all might x reader #all might x you #mha all might #all might #yagi toshinori #toshinori yagi x reader #toshinori yagi #toshinori yagi x daughter reader #bnha #mha #dad might #dad might x reader

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petertingle-yipyip · 2 months ago

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STRANGER (xiii) - KAZ BREKKER

tags: @beekeepingageissome @shadowzena43 @nikfigueiredo @mp-littlebit @starmansirius @hadesnumber1daughter @directioner5life @strvngestark @hostilityghost @ofmenanduhhhwellmen @justnerdystuffs @faeriepigeons // previously // next

Pairing: Kaz x Davina Rollins (enemies to lovers)

Word Count: 6,863

Summary: An unseen clock ticks down and alliances shift. Tensions rise behind the scenes in the Barrel and when a player leaves the board, a new conflict unfolds.

“I won’t tell you!” She screamed, shooting up in the bed.

You jolted awake from your spot on the floor, moonlight streaming through the window. Your knife was in your hand in an instant while your eyes darted around the room. You quickly realized you were in Melli’s room so you dropped the knife and sat on the edge of the bed.

You reached for her arms and gave her a gentle shake. Her eyes weren’t open but she was thrashing against you.

“Mellaney!” You said urgently. After the first few times of her doing that, you realized her full name got a quicker response.

As expected, her eyes opened and her expression fell to one that shot through your chest.

“I’m sorry.” She whispered. Her eyes watered and her lower lip quivered. “I didn’t… I promise.”

You said nothing. Instead, you pulled her into a tight embrace. Her hands fisted the back of your shirt and you felt her silent sobs.

It was three days since you got her back and she still couldn’t sleep through the night. You hadn’t slept in your own room since either. It felt haunted with the ghost of your last argument with Kaz, as if Jordie had come to hold you accountable for your harsh words.

If it wasn’t you sleeping on her floor, it was Kol while you watched over the Poisoned Rook. You used the time in the office to figure out how to keep your friends out of the fight considering your father knew their names and faces. The secret of your home’s location was the only shadow left for you to hide them in but they’d only stay in it if you barricaded them inside.

You were damn near considering it.

“I swear…” Her voice was muffled against your shoulder. “I didn’t tell ‘em anything, I swear.”

“It wouldn’t matter if you did.” You said softly.

“They kept saying I would break and when you found out, you’d kill me yourself.”

“All that matters is you’re safe now. You could’ve told the Lions everything and I’d still welcome you home, Mel. You’re my family and this is where you belong. That’s all I care about.”

She pulled away first and wiped her arm across her eyes. “What about Brekker?”

“What about him?” Your brows furrowed. You hadn’t mentioned much about Kaz other than the fact that he sent Wylan.

She shook her head.

“Maybe it wasn’t…” She trailed off and you realized something.

Melli was trying to distinguish what was real from what was taunts from the Dime Lions, what she could believe and what was used to torture her. If your heart could break anymore, it did at that moment.

“Brekker’s fine.” You promised, even though you had no idea. Ever since he left, he stayed gone.

It was for the best, you knew, but it still hurt. Even if it was exactly what you were trying to do. Maybe you’d visit Nina soon to ask how they all were.

“He was here.” She spoke slowly, trying to piece together the idea. Patiently, you let her. “I heard you and him yelling.”

“We were.” You nodded and her eyes seemed to brighten at the confirmation. “We do that a lot.”

“You were the angry one.”

“The idiot took a bullet the night we went to get you. I didn’t know he was going to be there. We brought him here to help him but I started a fight with him. I haven’t talked to him since.”

“Oh…”

“It’s alright.” You forced a smile. “I’m just glad he’s alive.”

“Pekka’s afraid, you know?” She changed the subject and you were glad. “I heard him talking to some of the Dime Lions that watched me.”

“He was there?” A new anger burned out your regret.

“Once. He was afraid of what would happen if you and Brekker actually came together. He didn’t outright say it but he thinks the Lions can take you both individually, not together.”

“Hmm.” You nodded slightly. “I’ll talk it over with Kol. Maybe he can help me figure something out.”

“He’s taken over for me, hasn’t he?”

“Temporarily, but you’ll always be my right hand. As soon as you’re up for it, you’ll be right where you left off.”

“You should keep him as your lieutenant.” She shook her head. “He’s stronger than me, a better fighter and a better soldier.”

“I never said my lieutenant needed to be a soldier. A strategist or a diplomat is just as useful.”

“He’ll serve you better than I can.”

“That’s up to you.” You said, swallowing your sadness. “If you want to take a step back after everything, I’ll understand, but we don’t have to make that decision right now. I can’t imagine what you went through…”

“They wanted to know everything... Where we stay, what jobs we have planned, what your relationship with Brekker was, if Kol was the only Grisha in our ranks, how many we have, how much money we have.” She wrapped her arms around herself like she could make herself smaller.

You noted the faint appearance of bruises across her wrists and forearm, the only evidence of the prior breaks. Kol had spent the better part of a day repairing those bones. The wrap around her chest was still there to secure the cracked ribs she suffered. Various bruises littered her back and stomach. Knife wounds healed and turned into faint scars on her legs. All traces of injury were gone from her face.

Kol worked himself into exhaustion putting Melli physically back together. While he rested, the least you could do was try to help put some of her mental pieces back together.

“You’re so strong, Mel.” You said softly. “They would’ve broken anyone else.”

“Not you.” She argued quietly. “You would’ve taken it and laughed. Spit in their faces.”

“I would’ve told them anything if it would’ve kept you safe.”

“No, you wouldn’t have.”

“No, I probably would’ve ran my mouth so much they would’ve put a bullet in my head instead.” You tried to joke.

“You would’ve lied or came up with something clever that would’ve put them into some unspoken trap that Brekker set.”

“Brekker won’t help me anymore. Him and the rest of the Dregs are keeping distance.”

“That’s not my point.”

“Right, I’m sorry.”

“The point, Davina, is that you and Kol, Kaz and all his friends, you’re all made for this Barrel life. I’m not…”

Before you could argue, Adrin came bursting through the door.

“Sorry. Good to see you awake, Melli” She smiled sheepishly. “Davina, we need you downstairs.”

“What’s wrong?” You stood. A new feeling of dread settled under your skin while your mind raced through what could be happening. You started to formulate a plan to try and get everyone out, the kind of distraction you’d need to keep focus from whoever was coming for you. Luckily, her explanation calmed your racing thoughts.

“Nik’s starting fights.” She frowned.

Melli threw her blanket back and you saw, from the corner of your eye, her swing her legs towards the floor. You wanted to tell her to stay out and rest, but you figured she was getting antsy and keeping her away from the action would do nothing to show that you still wanted her beside you. Instead, you gestured for Adrin to help and you hurried down the stairs, practically jumping them two at a time.

When you finally reached the main room, your Snakes were clustered around something. You could hear the sounds of shuffling feet, taunting cheers, and numbers being yelled. You elbowed your way to the center and once you reached it, the crowd quieted almost immediately but some kruge still exchanged hands.

“Someone care to explain?” You asked loudly.

Nik grinned viciously at you, drawing immediate suspicion. Carmen was the other person in the center and when she met your gaze, you immediately clocked the blood on her teeth and anger in her eyes. She didn’t start the fight but she was damned willing to finish it.

“There she is!” Nik announced and your glare shifted, allowing Carmen to fade back into the crowd. He had a stream of blood from his nose and a blossoming bruise around his right eye. “The Dreg slut!”

A collective gasp from behind you.

“If you want to keep your tongue, I suggest you apologize.” You warned tightly.

“Come on, Davina!” He laughed. “We all know you’re tumbling with Dirtyhands. You get turns with the Wraith as well?”

You rolled your eyes at the ridiculous rumor. “Funny

how you didn’t say any of this when they were here.”

“That’s why he got involved with Melli, right? Cause you’re just that good to him.”

“I can’t tell you why he helped us because I don’t know.” You admitted.

“Trouble in paradise?” His taunts continued.

“What I do know is that you are terrified of Brekker and the Wraith. You’ll say just about anything to keep them away from here, right?”

A chorus of muttered agreements came from the crowd.

“But Brekker and the Dregs have never moved against us. Have they?” You turned to your Snakes. “They aren’t exactly friends, but they aren’t our enemy. Dime Lions are our enemy! Dime Lions nearly killed Melli. Dime Lions have tried to make us into a joke.”

Some Snakes cheered.

“Because of you!” Nik yelled and you took a deep breath before facing him again. “Because you’re Davina Rollins!”

“So what?” You yelled. “I’m a Rollins by birth and nothing else. He’s afraid of us. He knows we’re coming for him and he can’t stop it.”

“Davina?” You spun immediately towards Kol’s voice. You hadn’t even realized he was back, but you weren’t surprised to see he had made it to Melli’s side. “Stadwatch is prowling around the Rook. They’re looking for you.”

Your expression fell immediately. Nik laughed again and you whirled on him. He held his arms out to his sides tauntingly.

He turned you in. The immediate thought was loud, pounding against your skull, but you didn’t want to believe it. How could he? You took Nik in when he was beaten out of his own home. He was one of your earlier members yet the potential for his betrayal seemed far too likely.

The Snakes closest to him stepped back as if they sensed your desire to beat a confession from him. One closest to you handed you a blade before taking their own step back.

“Davina?” Melli’s voice barely reached you.

“Lock him up.” You said flatly. “Keep him shackled till I get back.”

You turned away and almost immediately, your Snakes acted on your command. Some didn’t, looking between you and Nik with uncertainty.

“Say it.” You challenged.

“The Dregs know where we are now.” Aryan said firmly. “What’s to stop them from coming after us now? Our secret was supposed to keep us safe. You promised that.”

“Why would they?” You shrugged. “We’ve never crossed them.” Not as a group, but you personally betrayed Kaz. At least if he was going to come after you for that, it’d be specifically against you.

“We can’t trust them!” Soleeya yelled from deep within the crowd.

“Brekker helped bring Melli home!” Adrin countered. “That’s worth something!”

“Dirtyhands killed my brother!” Aryan continued.

You considered that. It was possible and not entirely unlikely, but it also seemed too convenient.

“The Wraith ruined my uncle’s career!” Stephan added.

“Wasn’t your uncle a slaver?” Carmen yelled.

“Fahey owes me money!” Fayven shouted.

“That’s your own fault. Fahey owes everyone money!” Kol argued.

“Enough!” You yelled over the chaos. “I will not sit here and let us implode because of one professional courtesy. Kaz Brekker and the Dregs have a long list of complaints. Fine. But guess what? In the grand scheme of things, there is no ill-will.”

“What if you’re wrong?” Nik continued.

“If I’m wrong, then I’ll hand over control of the Snakes to whoever can beat me.” You shrugged. “Until then, you’ll shut your mouth. Another word against the Dregs from any of you and your jaw’s wired shut. Understood?”

You spun in a slow circle, ensuring eye contact with each and every Snake.

Everyone made some sort of noise in agreement before dispersing. Kol looked over your shoulder to Nik, who was currently detained by two Snakes. You heard the thud and a moment later, Kol’s eyes met yours.

“Where are you going?” He asked.

You dropped the spare blade into your boot. “To deal with Stadwatch. Someone sold me out so you’ll need to post bail. Gather my personal funds, get my stash from the Rook if you need to. Until I’m back, keep them from tearing each other apart.”

“You’re not wrong about them.” Melli said quietly. “Even if the Dregs as a whole hate us, they listen to Brekker. Keep him and you keep them all.”

“Unfortunately, I don’t have him.” You confessed quietly.

“His Crows seem to think otherwise.” Kol teased.

You rolled your eyes before taking off.

“Blink last.” Melli called out as the door was closing being you.

By the time you got to the front door of the Poisoned Rook, the sun was rising. Ketterdam was waking up and Stadwatch was on you.

They yanked your arms before your back before slamming the shackles around your wrists. You winced slightly at the pressure but said nothing. You kept your head high as the onlookers slowed. Even the various doormen quieted for the spectacle.

Your eyes darted among the crowd for a familiar face. You didn’t find your father, which made you reconsider if he sold you out. Wouldn’t he want to witness your arrest?

Instead, your gaze found Kaz and his stupid hat.

He wore a blank expression that you quietly cursed. You nodded in acknowledgment and he took that as his cue to leave. Frowning to yourself, you were paraded away.

You waited in the cold cell alone, laying on the worn mattress. There was a small window on the opposite wall with three vertical bars. No way for you to slip through.

You found yourself thinking that Inej could probably do it.

You watched the light change and tried to count off the minutes you waited. You lost count by the time an officer came for you. Again, your hands were wrenched behind your back and you were guided down to a room that was void of furniture, save for two chairs and a heavy wooden table. You were shoved into one chair and the officer sat in the other.

“Davina Maxim Rollins.” He began and you winced slightly at your full name. “You are being charged with arson, possession of illegal substances, inhibition of trade, robbery, and general criminal mischief.”

“Who’s raising the charges?” You asked plainly.

“Are you aware of this building?” He ignored your words, pulling a folded map from his pocket instead. A red circle surrounded the cafe.

“Vaguely.” You shrugged.

“It burned down a few nights ago, one of Pekka Rollins’ properties.”

“Shouldn’t you be talking to Pekka then?”

“We did. He didn’t know anything but said you might.”

You frowned to yourself. Your father may not have turned you in but he sure was willing to utilize a chance to get you out of his way.

“And you take everything he says as truth?” You countered. The officer’s frown deepened.

“When I was young, I used to go there with my friends. One would talk trade with the owner.” You smiled slightly at the memory.

Regardless of it being part of your father’s con, it was still a memory of Kaz and Jordie. That would always trump any affiliation to Pekka.

“I haven’t been there in years, not since I found out it was part of an old con Pekka used to run. Figured it was abandoned by now.”

“And this?” From another pocket, he withdrew a shard of glass. “Scientists found traces of a drug from the Shu Han.”

Now that was interesting. You didn’t know the kvas was laced with a Shu drug considering Wylan never mentioned that. That alone made you doubt whether Stadwatch had facilities equipped to know that for certain or whether that was an actual shard from your jars. Someone likely fed them that information, the same someone who turned you in, and that had to be one of your Snakes. No one else knew what made up the gas.

Wylan wouldn’t turn you in, which only pointed another finger at Nik.

Another nail in the coffin.

“Do I look Shu?” You finally said when you realized how the silence had stretched. “My father’s heritage is the Isle, my mother Kerch. I wouldn’t know anything about a Shu drug if someone shoved it down my throat.”

“Did you purchase the drug?”

“No.”

“Did you steal it?”

“No.”

“Do you know where it came from?”

“You just said the Shu. My guess would be the ships of slavers you all never seem to catch. No doubt those ‘indentures’ need something to make the handover easier.”

“Ms. Rollins, this is your first time with Stadwatch.” He switched tactics in response to your growing hostility. “I’d hate to lock you away so young. Tell us something useful and we can work out a deal.”

“A tragedy.” You gave a sarcastic pout. “I don’t know about the cafe. I don’t know about the drug. I don’t know about any of Mr. Rollins’ properties or his men or any inhibition of trade. I mind my own, Officer, and I’d like to return to it.”

“What of Ms. Mellaney Dodgion? A report came in not too long ago of her being taken from Tante Heleen at the Menagerie and the suspect matches your description. She was quite adamant it was you.”

You snorted. You met Melli years ago. Whether that was truly considered ‘not too long ago’, you didn’t argue. Buy leave it to Stadwatch to believe whoever can shell out the most kruge.

“Ms. Dodgion had no contact or requirement to be with the Menagerie. It was a price her mother had to pay, what for I don’t know and don’t care. Besides, I’ve never had a conversation with Tante Heleen. I’d likely knock her teeth out if I ever did.” You spoke truthfully. “I despise the woman because she’s cruel, taking girls younger than me and putting them into horrendous situations. If anyone’s going to know about illegal drugs, it’d be her. But her coffers are always so full so Stadwatch keeps away, right? No, you’d rather bother little old me.” You heaved a dramatic sigh.

“And your affiliations with Dirtyhands?”

“A pretty little thing, he is.” You allowed a flush to cross your cheeks, hoping it portrayed an innocent crush. “It’s true that I’ve been to the Crow Club. Who hasn’t? But I swear, I could knock the man over the head with his cane and he still wouldn’t give me so much a glance.”

“We have it on good authority-“

“Who’s?” You cut in. “If you don’t have evidence against me, either post a bail for ‘criminal mischief’ or release me. I have no information for you, Officer. But even if I did, I’d never tell you.”

He frowned at you before mumbling about useless arrest and wasting time. You caught the name among his complaints.

Nik.

“Shall we send summons for your father to collect you?” He asked as he stood.

“Do that and my death is on you.” You laughed. “No, a friend is already on the way with enough pocket change to make this all go away.”

His eyes lit up at the mention of money.

“I do wish you had been more cooperative.” He sighed.

“The problem with that is that if I told you anything, you’d want more. You’d threaten anyone and anything you could to keep me compliant. I’d get nothing from it except a reputation of being a rat… Nik has done enough of that, don’t you think?”

He paled before hurrying out of the room. A new officer came and escorted you back to your cell to wait for Kol. You didn’t enjoy the new potential of eyes on you. Avoiding Dregs and Dime Lions was one thing, but to actively avoid Stadwatch was another. It was an aggressive wrench in all your plans, so you’d need to come into power quickly.

Your first concern, however, was ridding yourself of the rat.

Another hour passed before you were released and you managed to snag a short nap on the scratchy cot. You had to admit, it was more comfortable than the floor. You and Kol were quiet as you walked back to the Poisoned Rook. You didn’t miss the whispers that followed, the new rumors about you already brewing.

“What’s been done with Nik?” You asked, sorting through a trunk of costume pieces you’d been collecting.

“He’s been unconscious since you left. Why?” Kol answered simply. “And what are you looking for?”

You threw a short blonde wig onto your desk before starting to braid your hair. “I’m nearly certain he tried to sell me out to Stadwatch.”

“And you need a wig because…”

“I can’t bring him here to discuss it. He’ll try to rally the Snakes around him.” You pinned the braid around your head in a neat crown before fixing the wig into place. “However, I need thisn conversation to be public enough that he doesn’t feel immediately threatened. I’m not welcome in the Emerald Palace, nor do I want to go back there, which leaves…”

“The Crow Club.” Kol sighed. “I could’ve Tailored you if you’re doing this to avoid Brekker.”

“Drag Nik to the Club if you have to.” You reached into your boot and withdrew the blade. You tucked it into the front of your belt instead.

“Will you kill him?”

“Not directly.” You shook your head. “But we are walking him to his execution.”

“We?”

“Yes. You’re coming with me.”

He sighed slightly. “I should get back to Melli.”

“It wasn’t a request. You’re coming to make sure Kaz is busy while I’m there.”

“What am I supposed to do?”

“Talk to him.” You shrugged.

You weren’t alone at the Club for long. You took a seat at one of the card tables to pass the time. Nik slid into the seat next to you by the third hand. You caught Kol’s eye as he was being led to Kaz’s office. He offered a subtle nod and you wondered for a brief moment what they would talk about.

“Why are we meeting here?” Nik asked tightly. “What happened with Stadwatch?”

“Nothing, obviously.” You smiled. “And we’re here because it’s neutral ground, right?”

“You have power here and we both know it.” He spat.

“And you have none. A little birdie told me you’re not welcome here.”

“Yes, so let’s make this quick. Shall we?” His fingers were anxiously tapping the table.

“Nik, you betrayed me.” You said truthfully, spinning in your seat to face him. “You sold me out.”

“I did no such thing.” He whispered harshly. “It was your father, if anyone. It was his building you burned, his crew you’re killing!”

“I never said what the pretense of my arrest was.” Your head cocked in faux curiosity. “How’d you know?”

“Well, I- People talk, of course. Nothing stays secret in the Barrel for long, right?” He chuckled nervously.

With one hand, you carefully drew your blade with hopes of avoiding suspicion. With the other, you reached for the tucked end of his shirt. Nik was quick to grab your wrist so you leaned in with an innocent expression.

“All it takes is one word and I can have Dirtyhands here to end your life.” You said sweetly. “But I don’t want to do that to you, Nik. That’s why I came in disguise. You’ve been with me for a good while.”

“And I’ve been loyal to your fight. To you, Davina.” He tried, swallowing hard when you didn’t falter. “Please. I can explain.”

“You see…” You pulled more on his shirt until it came fully untucked. You gently pushed the fabric up until you saw the head of the snake tattoo on his lower abdomen. “I can take a few back-handed comments. I’ve gotten them my whole life, it feels like.”

“Davina…” He sounded breathless, frozen by your touch and words.

You slid out your chair, the sound of your feet landing lost in the sounds of the Crow Club. You felt a few lingering gazes on you so you played a part as the dealer stepped away. You inched forward so Nik’s knee was between your legs. To anyone else, you two were a pairing that was hitting it off and due for a good night. If anyone bothered to look closer, they’d see the burning purpose in your eyes.

“I can take it, Nik, but I won’t let betrayal and mutiny exist in my home. I just won’t.” You laughed with a shrug. You kept the shirt pinned up while you pressed the cold blade against his skin, just above where the tattoo started.

“I’ll leave Ketterdam.” He tried desperately. “I swear to you, Davina, you’ll never see me again.”

“I’m sorry.” You said with fake sympathy. “But I just can’t trust you. So long as you bear my patron, you reap the benefits. Let’s say you do leave but end up back here for one reason or another… That tattoo implies you’re safe and welcome with us, but you’re not. Not anymore.”

“Please, Davi. I’m begging you.” His eyes darted between yours. He didn’t bother to hide his fear as he recognized his mistake.

“No you’re not.” You pushed on the knife and his jaw clenched to avoid crying out. You shushed him gently.

As you slid the metal under his skin, you leaned in to speak quietly in his ear. “Taking your tattoo is a mercy. I won’t risk my people’s safety for you.”

You leaned away and pulled the knife the rest of the way through. The flap of skin landed on his thigh. You let his shirt fall back into place before you picked up the bloodied flesh. His breath was coming in heavy pants as he clutched the seeping wound.

“Mercy.” He spat at you, any trace of your former friend and ally gone. You quietly lifted your eyebrows. “You couldn’t give me the mercy of your Healer?”

“No.” You answered firmly. You slapped the flesh over the back of his other hand before slamming the knife down, pinning his hand - and the skin inked with the head of the snake - to the table. “Because he is my Healer. He is my people, and you aren’t anymore. My mercy comes by way of you bleeding out before Dirtyhands gets to you. Ask the Saints that he kills you quickly..”

His head snapped towards you and you smiled wickedly.

“You think the Wraith didn’t see you come in here? You truly think the Bastard doesn’t know you’re here? Or that a cheap wig can truly fool him? Or that Kol wouldn’t have told him by now, considering your little trick could’ve put Melli in danger?” You laughed slightly. “You think I’m a fool but you don’t even know the trap you walked into.”

“He’ll kill me.” Nik panicked.

“Better him than me.” You shrugged and backed away. “If I ever see you after this, your death won’t be kind.”

“I hope Pekka destroys you.” He spat.

Silently, you smiled and turned on your heel. On your way out, you caught Jesper near the door.

“New look, huh?” Jesper grinned and flicked the blonde hair. His eyes scanned the wig and then your face then your body. His eyes lingered on your hand and you subtly rubbed your fingers together. Blood. He met your gaze with an unspoken question in his eyes.

“Tell Mr. Brekker there’s a gift for him at one of his card tables.” You said instead.

Jesper turned and quickly looked at the tables. His focus stopped on Nik trying to free his hand. He already seemed weakened from the blood loss.

“That’s… That’s one of yours, innit?” Jesper turned back to you.

“He bears no snake.” You shrugged and you saw Jesper’s attention dart back down to the blood on your hand. “Tell Dirtyhands to have fun with that one.”

“Saints, Davs.” He sighed. “What’d the poor man do?”

You said nothing. You had already begun backing away.

“Hang on.” Jesper tried to reach for you but you had already blended into the exiting crowd. You hung in the doorway to catch his last few words. “Kaz is gonna kill me when I tell him she’s come and gone.”

That comment seemed promising.

You felt a hand around yours to pull you away. You tensed, ready to fight, but relaxed when you saw it was just Kol.

“How’d it go?” He asked when you fell into stride with him.

“He tried to blame Pekka instead of owning up to it, so I took his tattoo and left him there. Whatever happens now isn’t my problem.” You answered.

“You took his tattoo in the middle of the Crow Club?”

“It was a tricky spot so I only managed to cut off the head. I couldn’t exactly take his pants off to get the rest off his hip. Imagine those rumors.” You shook your head. “What did you talk to Kaz about?”

“You.”

You silently nodded. You had expected as much but something about it still felt strange.

“I assume he’s still angry.” You tried to sound nonchalant but judging by the glance Kol gave, you didn’t.

“He’s always angry, it seems.” Kol joked. “But he seemed more angry at himself than you. You, he was more hurt by.”

You sighed regretfully.

“I know you believe you’re doing what you have to and I can’t convince you otherwise.” Kol continued. “But be careful that it doesn’t get to a point of no return. When this is all over, I assume you’ll want more of a life. You deserve that much but you won’t have it if you villainize yourself against everyone you love.”

“I don’t love him.”

“Don’t you?”

You made a noncommittal sound and let Kol guide you to the Rook. He went back to your building, mentioning something about resetting one of Melli’s ribs that weren’t aligned. When you hurried to ask him about it, he pulled a face and shrugged. You made a mental note to kick him in the shins when you saw him again.

When you got to your office, Inej was waiting for you.

“Not even Stadwatch can keep you.” She said with a small smile. “Can they?”

“Not when I have such important things to do.” You laughed slightly and pulled the wig off. “What do you have for me?”

She handed you an envelope. Inside was Heleen’s guard rotation, a sketch of the girl who was supposedly willing to help you, a blueprint of the Menagerie, and a rough schedule.

“You’ve been busy.” You commented.

She gave a casual shrug. “I still can’t figure out what Kaz is willing to trade.”

“I’m sure I’ll know it when I see it.”

“You’ve been busy as well.” She gestured to the wig you dropped on your desk. “Jesper said something about an abandoned Snake.”

“Not abandoned.” You shook your head. “Disowned. Nik chose his own fate.”

“Nik? The one who ran his mouth when you brought us in?”

You nodded and she tried to hide her smirk.

“Has anything else happened with the Lions?” You asked. Something told you that you wouldn’t have much time left with Inej that night.

“Nothing big. Kaz had a little interaction with a few when he was around the Orchid.”

“The Orchid isn’t Dime Lion territory.” Your brows furrowed.

“A new acquisition, apparently. Maybe to make up for the money he lost when you took this place over.”

“It’s still strange for him to be interested in a Pleasure House…” You pinned the thought to figure out relevance

later.

“They tried to warn us off the job.” She continued. “He doesn’t care. We leave in two days.”

“I don’t think there’s a soul in Ketterdam that can warn Kaz of anything.” You laughed slightly. “You probably have the best shot.”

She gave you a pointed look.

“He very easily tells me no.” You defended.

“Yet he still does it.”

You waved a hand to dismiss the thought. “Wylan told me about your group’s little saying, instead of good luck… Melli and I have one, too. We say to blink last and die tomorrow.”

A hesitant knock sounded at your office door, the coded knock for your building. You felt a new concern in your veins as you held a finger to your lips to signal Inej. The Wraith was already inching towards the window.

“Everything alright?” You called out.

“You have a visitor.” Adrin answered. You didn’t miss the uncertainty in her voice.

“I shouldn’t.”

“He was very… Insistent.”

You turned to Inej, now perched on your windowsill.

“No mourners.” She mouthed.

“No funerals. Blink last.” You returned silently.

“Die tomorrow.” She grinned before slipping out and disappearing from view.

You went and sat behind your desk, tucking away Inej’s intel.

“Fine.” You called out, not bothering to hide the annoyance. “Come in.”

After a moment, the door opened and Adrin walked in first. She mouthed an apology before stepping aside, letting the visitor in.

You had only a moment to be surprised before settling your features to a mask of indifference. You simply

nodded to Adrin before she slipped back out.

“You shouldn’t bully my doorman.” You scolded lightly and dropped the wig to the floor behind your desk.

“She should stand her ground better.” Kaz shrugged, looking everywhere in your office but at you.

“You shouldn’t be here at all.”

“You’re likely right.”

“So why are you?”

“Your Heartrender came to see me today.”

You briefly wondered if that was what your dynamic had fallen to. Sharp, one sentence responses with little to no emotion.

“Well, Kol is free to go out and make friends. What does that have to do with me?”

“He didn’t tell you?” Finally, Kaz met your gaze. You only shrugged at him. “We’re leaving Ketterdam for a job.”

Briefly, you wondered why Kol didn’t tell you. You couldn’t remember if you had already mentioned it to him, but if you hadn’t, Kaz was likely trying to push your buttons. You didn’t give him much of a reaction.

“I’d offer you my luck but it doesn’t seem to do anyone any favors.” You said, a slight edge to your words. “May the Saints watch over you.”

He scoffed slightly. “I don’t care for Saints.”

“Only profit, right? You believe in yourself and your friends and nothing else.”

You could see the thoughts behind his eyes, unspoken words that he reconsidered several times over. He seemingly decided against them all.

“How’s Melli?” He asked instead. He made his way over to her desk, which you had only recently put back the way it should be after letting Wylan work on it. You watched as he examined some of her trinkets.

“Why are you here, Kaz?” You tried again.

For some reason, it didn’t seem like he had an answer. Not one he wanted to share, at least. He glanced over his shoulder at you then returned to his inspection of Melli’s collection.

“She’s alright.” You said. “Still a bit banged up, but I think her mind is in more pain than her body. She’s up and moving, which is good. She’s strong, but she may not want to return as my lieutenant. And then Nik went and tried to have me arrested so things are a bit uneasy across the board.”

You hoped you didn’t have to specify that he was included in the last bit.

“Is that why you had him stripped of his tattoo and left in my Club?” He glanced over his shoulder at you again, one of Melli’s pendants - one you had gotten from a Ravkan vendor for her birthday - in his hand. You could see the hint of a smile on his face, like he knew where it came from.

“Is that where he went off to?” You shrugged, the indifference playing in your voice. “Hmm, guess he chose a cruel death.”

“He’s not dead, not yet at least.”

“You’ll use him for information then.” You sighed slightly. “Well you won’t have to torture anything out of him. I’m sure he’ll tell you everything you want to know.”

“I don’t need anything from him.” He almost sounded offended as he came to sit across from you. “Your Snakes aren’t the problem.”

“Everyone else in the Barrel would disagree.” You dramatically threw an arm to the side. “You thrive off leverage. Nik could tell you everything you need to keep us under your thumb. You’d be an idiot to not take advantage of that and you never pass on this kind of opportunity.”

“You think so little of me, Dear. For all you know, I know what I need to know about you and your friends. I don’t want to fight you right now.”

“If you’re not here to threaten me or taunt me with all the details Nik could give you, why are you here?”

“We leave in two days.” He repeated the information you already had. Did he know Inej had come to you or was she that good at keeping her secrets? “And I’ve come to offer you a job while we’re gone.”

Now that was interesting.

“Pekka will see this as collusion.” You pointed out as you came around your desk to lean against it beside him.

“Who said Pekka needs to know?” He shrugged casually.

“I’m listening.”

“I need you to keep an eye on my Crow Club.”

“Can’t Haskell look out for his own turf?” You raised your brows in slight challenge. “Why do you need me?”

“Because I trust you.”

“You don’t trust Haskell?”

“The man wouldn’t realize something was wrong until it slapped him in the face.”

“Why come to me after what I said to you?”

His fingers drummed the crow’s head atop his cane.

“Crows tell each other who has been kind to them.” He explained and you felt dumbfounded for a second. What that had to do with anything was beyond you but you let him talk, if only to keep him there. “They tell each other who to look out for… You always looked out for me, Vina. You’ve always been kind.”

“And it’s turned into my greatest weakness. My kindness has gotten too many people hurt.” Your eyes fell to the spot on his chest where the bullet hit for a moment.

“Pain is part of life in the Barrel. Those who cannot bear it never belonged here. Those who can are stronger for it.”

“What one can bear and what they should have to bear aren’t the same.” You said quickly. “I shouldn’t have to bear the weight of my father’s forgotten sins but I do. You shouldn’t have to bear the weight of it either but you do. I can’t fix that for either of us. I can’t keep Melli and Kol and the rest of them safe. I cant-“

“You do what you have to.” The head of his cane lightly thumped against your chest, right over your heart. “You always have. Sometimes your kindness is what’s needed rather than your father’s cruelty.”

“Why would you need someone to watch the Club anyway?” You pushed the cane away and redirected the conversation as you recognized the recurring argument looming.

“I don’t need anyone taking advantage.”

“Who would…” You began but then a new understanding washed over you. With a jolt, you considered what he was risking for Inej’s buyout. You wouldn’t just be looking for some amount of kruge or some promised deal or trade. You’d have to steal back the Crow Club.

“What did you do?” You asked quietly, hoping you were wrong.

“Will you help me or not, Davina?” He asked firmly instead.

“Of course, you idiot.” You rolled your eyes slightly. You met his eyes and you thought of Kol’s words. If he was right and you could build more of a life in the Barrel, would it be so wrong to try? If you couldn’t have it, shouldn’t you fight for it instead of against it?

“I don’t suppose this means I’m forgiven?” You tried.

Saints help you.

“What do you think my forgiveness looks like?”

“I don’t know.” You confessed. “I guess I never thought I’d actually see it.”

“Do this for me and maybe you will.” He stood, offering you his hand to shake. You stood with him. “I may even be so moved with gratitude that I’ll give you a share of the haul.”

You snorted a small laugh. “I didn’t think you knew that word.”

“Share?”

“Gratitude.” You grinned and shook his hand. “The deal’s the deal.”

41 notes · View notes

keelt9 · 3 months ago

Text

Chapter 7

Masterlist

Mika takes out of the oven a new tray of cookies, white chocochips. “You fly right to Monaco or Belgium?” With her day off she insisted we should do a sleepover.

In her apartment the combination of color green and white makes you feel calm in every room, she said after a long day she could fall asleep even in the kitchen without a problem.

The last GP before summer break has me more excited than I could ever expect and with no race week in the middle of it, it only increases a little bit more.

“I have to pick my last bag from my brother's house, then from Belgium right away to here.” I take a sip of my tea. It's a sleepover but she refused to let another drop of caffeine be on my body, while she can avoid it.

She has that smile, the corner of her lips barely raises but her eyes full of admiration.

“I’m not going to be emotional if it’s what you’re expecting, I’m just proud, that’s all.” Mika takes her baking gloves off her hands, sitting next to me.��Just a few things we need to work on.”

I scoff, but she’s right. “Less caffeine, more vitamins and minerals, and proper hours of sleep…” I cover her mouth with another cookie.

“I got it, I got it. Take care of myself.” Her doorbell along my cell phone warned us the food is here.

“That’s mint, although.” She points to the sticker at the back of my phone. “Tell Lewis I wouldn't mind one of these.”

I turnt it around observing the sticker while she's walking to her door. A tyre and in the middle a small paw; is now on my phone case.

I whisper to myself before biting my lip. “It was someone's last request before I go.”

I arrived in Monaco Wednesday night, Lewis will come to pick me up on the weekend. Right now, he is America, fashion icon one more time.

All my boxes were successfully delivered to London; let me spend the days working, my determined conviction is to enjoy the last to GP without having to work in the paddock.

That Friday night, after I went for a glass of water; back in my room the screen on my phone is lights on, 2 missing calls. I don’t have to ask who it was because it’s calling one more time.

“Y/N?” The voice of Alexa is full of relief. “I’m sorry, I know it’s late but could you…”

“It’s urgent mon amour!” Alexa bluffs, the voice of Charles clearly hammered sounds so funny.

“Long story but can you com…” One more time she’s interrupted.

“Hellu, Y/N? It 's you right, bien sûr que c’est vous, Max is acting like a kid.” Yeah, only him.

Like he’s telling a secret he whispers right to the phone. “He refuses to go, maybe you don’t have notice but it’s late at night, really late..”

I heard Alexa asking him to sit one more time. “Sorry, it’s just…”

It only takes me one look around the dark room and the clock, 2:31 am. “I’ll go, send me the address.”

I bet the cab driver must have been chuckling when he heard the direction I asked him to take me and a girl wearing joggers, hoodie and a cap.

When I arrived a lot of people were coming out of a fancy club, nice clothes still some totter and others into a “deep” talk.

I took my phone out and dialed Alexa's number. “Where are you?” She told me, took them to a nearby bench so they could calm down.

The near bench was 2 blocks away!

The scene I found it’s far away, the one I'll picture on my way here. Alex is holding Charles hand who is leaning in her arm as Max sits still, eyes closing, when she sees me her face relax.

“Hi, I’m sorry for the delay.” My voice makes Charles open his eyes and point at me.

“There she is!” Alexa rolls her eyes but she is smiling at him.

“I’m the one who should say sorry, but… things went out of control.” I shake my head. “He refused to go.”

I softly touch Max’s shoulder, he opens his eyes like the last time the redness in his face is evident.

“Are you ok?” Max stands or at least he tries because immediately sits down one more time. “No, you don’t.” My hand on his shoulder is enough for him to rest his head over it. “Hm, I’ll call a cab to take you home, all right?”

Actually I called for two, one for Alexa and Charles and another for Max; she was worried if I would be ok, I calmed her telling her it’s not my first time, making her giggle.

A couple of minutes after they left, a cab stopped in front of us. “Come on Max, it’s time.”

I put his arm around my shoulder as he got into it, thank God the woman didn't mind taking a look at the boy who has a cap of Machster university.

After I made sure he’s safe, I was about to close the door, he slightly pulled my hoodie. “It's late, remember, I’ll protect you.”

Not again.

I take a deep breath, I try to get his hand from my hoodie but he covers my hand with his other hand. “Please.”

Who could I…

By the time we reached his apartment I already had backup in case I could need them.

Max has been dealing pretty well until we get into the lift, he comes out of the cab without so much fuss, walking inside of his building, swaying a little bit, but inside he leans back slowly slipping on the floor of the lift.

A deja vu. “Ok, no, no.” This time I’ll gladly help him to stand, however when he stands the metal door helps me to see he has a smirk on his face.

“Are you enjoying this?” I ask fighting to contain a smile, and his arm around my shoulder. Max shakes his head but a giggle escapes too. “Yeah, sure.”

Took Max 5 minutes to open his door, but he refused to let me help him, saying it’s a door, <Who can’t open a stupid door?> Well…

The impressive amount of trophies in his home along with some helmets and his sim, left me speechless. “Wow.”

Max smiles looking at me with eyes half close. “I couldn't make it all fit.”

“Let’s go, you need to lay down.” He points to the last door. “Believe me, you’re heavier than I think.”

His bedroom has a clear contrast, creamy colors with a navy blue and just a few frames with photos is all I can see.

With a smile on his face, lays down in his bed. Searching for a blanket, he rolls to his right with eyes closed so I thought he was already asleep; I was about to leave his room when he speaks.

“Tell me a story.” I tilt my head, his eyes still closed but he patted the side of the bed so I could sit.

“Am…I'm not pretty good at telling stories. Dad used to make sleep humming a Bob Marley song… And definitely I'm not going to sing to you.” The memories of dad taking me to my room in his arms as he sings a full song while he covers me watching me fall asleep are one of my most treasured memories.

“That sounds like a good story.” His bubbly laugh makes me smile.

I scratch my forehead, trying to find another story to tell him. “Fuck.”

Max opened his eyes, visibly tired, still making a huge effort to stay awake. “I never heard you curse…Interesting.”

I laugh because it’s the most silly thing I heard that night. “Let me think, you asked me where the idea of the shelter was, right?” Max nods. “Well, that will be..”

When I was 7 probably 8 years old, Lewis and I were walking around London; he was already in F1 and it was the summer break, near to our old house we found a big brown dog limping from one his legs, it took us 1 minute decided to help him, so I ran for bread in the nearest store. At the beginning he reluctantly smelled it but after we sat next to him, he approached us step by step.

Came late at night with a huge dog was the last thing our parents expected and after a long talk they agreed he would stay with us until he fully recovered. The next day the veterinarian told us he was an old dog probably 12 years old, his health was weak and the fracture in his leg doesn’t give him a long life expectancy, but could care less.

Moon, as we called him, spent the last 3 years of his life with us, waiting for me at the bus stop every time I came from school, making dad and mom company every second and trying to jump when Lewis came home.

Sadly on a hot night of summer, Moon says goodbye to us sharing the last night of tea under the table.

That week while I was crying in my room as Lewis hugged me, we made a promise, when I were older enough, we would try to help every homeless dog to at least have a safe place to live.

As I finished Max was breathing slowly, head buried in his blanket, fully asleep now.

I observed him for a couple of seconds, his eyes closed, the tight grip on the blanket and his face red for too many drinks.

“I’m going to miss you.” I chuckle, I leaned down for giving a small peck in his cheek. “Good night Max.”

I waited for my back ups in his living room. After 20 minutes Max's door opens one more time, Rupert, his personal trainer, enters quickly.

I think he finally breathed after I told him Max is peacefully sleeping in one piece. “I’ll take you home, we can leave him locked, making sure he doesn't make a bigger mess.” Nice offer but I need time to calm down, a little bit.

“No worries, I already called a cab, it’s ok, thank you anyway.” Rupert nods as he opens the door.

“Y/N, thank you so much.” Rupert said, reliving that Max is safe at home.

“Am, Checo has plenty of good numbers which I can call.” I joke trying to rest importance to the moment and my confused feelings.

Lewis arrived early in the morning to his apartment, finding me asleep on the couch; we just had a quick breakfast and left right away. We want to enjoy all the moments we can, just for us.

“I can understand it, it just doesn't make so much sense for me.” He keeps complaining that most of the time I have a tendency to sleep on the couch.

We’re waiting inside of his jet ready to leave. “Because it hasn’t, the couch could be really comfy sometimes.” Lewis raises his eyebrow. “What? Oh you’re so…” I fake a shiver that made him laugh.

“All right, let’s have fun this week.” He pulls me, grabbing my head and carness my hair. “My little baby is already leaving me.”

I laugh but I softly kick his leg for he let me go laughing like a little kid.

By the end of the day of practice, the social accounts of Mercedes made sure people knew Lewis brought company, with a picture of me on my first GP. A little girl who is wearing big headphones on her head as Lewis is next to me explain something I couldn’t remember; now, the picture is me, similar headphones watching Lewis is on the track, the description is <Time goes by…>

Walking inside the hotel Lewis keeps watching the first photo on his phone. “Look at you, when you used to be so cute.”

I roll my eyes, similar to all the comments friends and family have sent me along the day. “The <sexy> comments are still too much for me.”

Lewis put his phone in his pocket shaking his head. “I’m sorry, I’m sti…” My words stuck in my throat when I saw Max coming out of the lift.

All these days, my routine practically consists of going to the garage then the hospitality, with more cameras on me that I expect making me feel shy avoiding all types of contact with people who haven't a Mercede shirt.

Max smiles when his eyes are found with mine, but a weird tension on his shoulders appears when Lewis says hello.

“Let’s go Max, we’re late.” One of the girls from the Red Bull PR team waits for him a few steps away from us.

Lewis softly makes me walk inside of the lift, unable to say something to him.

“Did a <race> incident happen?” I ask to try to see him right to his eyes, but I only see his profile.

“He called around 4 am on Saturday morning, he wanted to apologize for the mess he made. He knows he has to do it with you but doesn't have your phone number.” Oh shit. The jaw tense only increased my nerves. “I asked what mess, and he told me you take him home late at night, drunk.”

He saw me, an uncomfortable expression on his face. “For the second time.”

Max Verstappen why do you like to complicate things?

“Well, I…only help, that’s all.” My finger starts to grip my purse tighter.

Lewis narrows his eyes and takes a deep breath. “What did you tell him?”

“What makes you think I told him something?” It's my turn to choke my head with a serious expression on my face. “Make sure it won’t happen again.”

Covering my face was the only thing I could do. “That’s the only thing I said to him then, he said he likes you.”

The sensation of the elevator going slowly makes me feel dizzy. We have to be on the last floor.

“I know.” Lewis choked as his eyes turned wide open. “He already implied that.”

As the doors open Lewis makes a sign with his head for going to his room, the talk definitely doesn’t end.

We talked for one hour… He let me talk. I told him about the first time we met until that Friday night. From time to time I feel an odd heat on my face and a peaceful sensation in my heart.

“That’s all.” I laid back on the chair feeling his eyes on me but he’s more relaxed now.

“You li…” He tried to speak but I cut him right away.

“NO! Don’t say it.” I stand walking to the big window.

The lights of the streets and buildings always make me feel calm, a spark of light in the dark. “I have a ton of things on my head, it’s just… a new friend, a stubborn friend, that’s all. Let’s not confuse things.”

Lewis stood next to me, tingling my arm with his. “Better.” I bluff, making him smile. “Seriously, I appreciate him so much but, like mom said, he’s too sassy most of the time.”

I laughed and leaned my head on his shoulder. “Trust me Lew, next week I’ll be at home, keeping me busy with all the things I have to do, all will go back to normal.”

“I just want to protect you, I couldn’t do it last time.”

I know Lewis believes he could do something for me those days, the truth is, not even myself could prevent how the things went that day.

“This is what it feels like?” Lewis saw me raising his eyebrow as we walked to the garage for the race day. “Be observed under a microscope.”

Lewis laughs head backwards, but for 3 days at least I have one camera so close to my face on the day.

“Stop right there!” Bottas reached us coming out of his garage, suit on. “You broke my heart, you told us you’ll be here until the end of the season.”

My sharp eyes go right to Lewis. “I thought they already knew.”

“They?” Checo came running from his garage winning exasperated eyes from his PR team. “Lewis Hamilton you’re so…”

Bottas grabs my hand about to give my brother a little punch on his chest. “We don’t use violence.”

“Is it true?” Checo asked, putting one more time on his cap which was about to fall from his head.

“I’m afraid it is.” Bottas hugs me, keeping Lewis safe from me.

Checo bluffs but he has an idea for the way he smiles. “We have to take drastic measures.”

It seems they already had this planned for the way they told me their idea so confidently. In a way to say goodbye after the race they already have reserved a nice restaurant for a goodbye dinner like they called.

“After all, I’m afraid we won’t see you soon, right?” Bottas asked with a funny expression on his face.

I scoff but he’s right. “I’m afraid I don’t have a clue either.”

A great close; Lewis gets second place in a tight final lap. I spent all the time in the front line even in the ceremony where I couldn't avoid seeing Max who from time to time, took a look where I was smiling at him too.

When all the fuss calmed down Lewis' team prepared a small cake for us, wishing success in our new project and like Rosa said. <Wishing we see you soon,>

I know I should be prepared for this, still it’s hard to contain the tears, for months they gave me a refugee and more.

As night falls, there are just a few technicians, most of the team's withdrawal from the garage. I told Lewis before going to the dinner I need to talk with Max, hesitant he nods but insite if I need something call him right away.

Checo told me Max is probably still in his garage; he won although he doesn’t like the way his car feels along all the race.

I found him leaning back in his car breathing deep seeing it like he could scan with his eyes to find the problem. I approach him slowly, hating the way my steps echo on the floor warning him about my presence.

Max turned his head but didn’t make another move, in his eyes you see a mix of surprise and ease, like he’s been waiting for this still wasn’t prepared for it.

I stand next to him unable to say or make another move, like a layer of ice born between us .

“I thought you had an appointment for dinner.” Max is always straightforward.

I look at his car but it’s hard to find some words, not now he clearly knows something.

“I wanted to talk to you before you hear it, even though I’m late, right? I will say it right away.” I let all the air on my lungs come out. “This was my last Grand Prix.”

Max knuckles turn white while he’s still grabbing his car, his blue eyes one more time start to form a storm inside of it.

“Yeah, I heard…something about it.” He clears his throat, his voice is the most serious I’ve heard from him. “Why now?”

“The project is getting into a critical phase, traveling around the world it’s getting more complicated.” My words are heavier than I thought it would be. “This is the best for me.”

Max finally stands quickly making me feel vulnerable but not intimidated. “I wasn’t expecting this.”

The moment his eyes found mine I saw more bewilderment than anger. “I thought I had more time.”

Inside of me there is a fight I clearly wasn’t prepared for, I don’t want to hurt him but I won’t quit my decision.

“I didn't want to tell you because things were pretty “weird” and you have a race. I want you to hear it from me, not for a rumor.” Max nods when he turns to his left slightly. I see the way his jaw tense.

A dry laugh it’s the only thing I heard for a couple of seconds, a sign that still he couldn’t believe it. “So this is it.”

That’s not a question and not a statement.

I take a step, not a physical one. “I’m being honest, I’m glad we got to know each other.” Even if I’m smiling, a nostalgic feeling makes my heart squeeze.

Max put his hands at both sides of his waist, frustrated on every move of his body, in his eyes you can see him searching for the right words to say, until something clicks on his head.

“I'm dying to ask you to stay but I won’t do it, but… if I ask you to come just one more couple of races, you will come?”

I observed him, always surprised with his honesty. “Max, I… I’ll be busy, you know?”

The determination in his eyes it’s really annoying in a good way. “I know, I’m, oh my God Y/N why are you making this so hard?”

I giggle, getting my head low. “Max, let's be honest, I’m not the one who complicates things, you said and do weird things and I…”

“Because I’m trying to flirt with you!” Max has his fist tight, and chuckles about the odd situation around us. “Ok, I say it, you want me to repeat it, I’ll do it.”

I shake my head; he seems it’s about to scream.

“Y/N…” I see around all the garage, unable to see or hear anything. “Now, can you please let me do this properly, you are taking away from me half of a year.”

“Max…” He definitely won’t shut up.

“I'm flirting with you because I like you!” As soon as that word came from his mouth I walked closer covering it with one of my hands as the other one grabbed his arm, otherwise I would fall over him.

Any of us expect that because of the way his eyes open and his arm tighten, from that moment on, something will change, things won’t return to normal.

I close my eyes trying to calm down but… Have you seen the sea when it’s dark blue with the soft white line of the waves crashing against each other?

I could see it right now on his eyes

#f1 #f1 imagine #formula 1 #max verstappen #max verstappen x reader #f1 x reader #f1 fanfic #f1 x female reader #max verstappen imagine #lewis hamilton #mercedes #sir lewis hamilton

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tip-top-cloud-surfer · 2 years ago

Text

First Time Father - Rooster

Pairing: Rooster / Wife (No Name or Appearance)

Word Count: 1.2k

Warnings: Hospital Visit, Self Doubt, Stress, Light Angst, Sick Baby, Baby OC is Referred to as 'Dove,' Rooster Thinks He's a Bad Dad

This work, all of my other works, and my entire blog are 18+ Only.

Summary: It's Rooster's first time alone with his baby daughter. But when she comes down with a fever under his watch, Rooster seriously doubts his abilities as a father.

Master List

It was Rooster’s first extended time alone with his daughter without his wife around.

He was very much a hands-on dad, but his wife was their daughter’s primary caregiver for the first four months of their daughter’s life because of maternity leave and then her gradual return to work. Rooster was always quick to look after their daughter, who they nicknamed Dove, when he got home, but he openly acknowledged that his wife cared for Dove most often.

So, with his wife’s college friend’s child-free wedding coming up, Rooster had a three-day weekend to care for his daughter all on his own. And, well, this was a test for himself. His wife didn’t put excessive expectations onto him. That was all Rooster.

He always tried to check-in with his wife to make sure that he was pulling his weight with Dove. Rooster didn’t want to become one of those complacent dads who just relied on their wife for everything and couldn’t take care of their own child by themselves. He didn’t want his wife to be one of those women who said that she had two kids at home—her actual baby and her husband.

Maybe that was just the fear creeping up from his conversations with Penny about her divorce and what the older guys at work said, but Rooster wanted to prove to himself that he could do it. He could take care of his daughter by himself without any hiccups.

Rooster’s wife left Thursday night and Rooster handled Thursday night and Friday morning perfectly well. Dove stayed on her nap and feeding schedule, he got some projects done around the house, and they even went to see Grandpa Mav. But then a few hours after they got home, Dove came down with a fever and started crying like nothing Rooster had ever heard before.

And, well, maybe he panicked just a little bit.

The lights of the ER were bright and blinding and Rooster did his best to shield Dove’s eyes from the excessive light. Holding her against his chest as she cried, Rooster tried to console her as he waited for a medical professional to come and collect them.

Since it was a Friday night, the pediatrician and Urgent Care centers were all closed. And his wife wasn’t answering her phone, probably because she was at the rehearsal dinner. And the lady giving him the side eye for the last hour combined with his daughter’s continuous cries were really starting to push Rooster over the edge.

“It’s okay,” Rooster tried to console his daughter, his voice breaking a bit. “It’s okay, sweetheart.”

He pressed a kiss to the top of his daughter’s little head, praying for some advice from his mom. She would know what to do in this situation. But Bradley didn’t know what he was doing. Maybe he wasn’t as good of a father or as good of a husband as he wanted to be. As he thought he was.

“Bradshaw,” a nurse called, causing Bradley to hurry to his feet.

The nurse led him back to one of the smaller hospital rooms. Bradley listed off the timeline of events to the nurse, who nodded, typed them up, and walked off to grab a doctor. Rooster tried setting his daughter back into her carrier, but that only made her cry louder. He picked her back up and cradled her to his chest, feeling a few tears leak out.

“I know, sweetheart. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry you’re in pain,” he whimpered, resting his head on top of her smaller one.

There was a light knock on the door before a man dressed in a pair of turquoise scrubs and round glasses stepped into the room. The doctor seemed to quickly assess the situation before striding further into the room.

“I’m Dr. Greene,” he stated, causing Rooster to nod. “What seems to be the problem?”

“She has a fever and she won’t stop crying and I don’t know what’s wrong. Nothing that I try seems to work,” Rooster replied shakily, hugging his daughter just a little tighter as she continued to cry. “And I don’t know what to do.”

“Alright, let me take a look at her.”

Rooster set his daughter on her back on the examination table. She wiggled around, still whimpering and crying. Dr. Greene started with his stethoscope and listened to her heart and lungs. He quickly checked her ears and her throat and looked over her vitals again. Rooster stood to the side, trying to comfort his daughter as well as he could while subtly wiping his tears away.

He must have done something wrong. He was a terrible father. He screwed up his daughter.

“It’s an ear infection. Nothing too serious,” Dr. Greene deduced, straightening up. “I’ll prescribe some antibiotics. That should clear it up in a few days.”

“But her screams . . . she sounds like she’s in a lot of pain.”

“Ear infections hurt. And this seems to be her first one and she’s only about four months old. Every little bit of pain to a baby can easily be the worst pain that they’ve ever experienced before,” Dr. Greene explained calmly, typing away at the chart. “Her heart rate is normal and her lungs are clear. And an ear infection can cause the fever.”

“And the ear infection, what caused it?” Rooster asked nervously, rubbing his daughter’s head.

“Well, does she spend any time around other kids? Is she in daycare or does she have any siblings?” Dr. Greene suggested, turning back to Rooster.

“She’s at daycare twice a week,” Rooster breathed out, causing Dr. Greene to nod.

“Exactly. Those places are a breeding ground for disease. Especially with babies and young children who haven’t really built up an immunity to anything.”

“So . . . I didn’t do anything wrong?”

“No, I don’t think so,” Dr. Greene stated, finishing up with the chart. He turned back to Rooster, studied his tired and frazzled expression, and offered him a small smile. “First time dad?”

“Is it that obvious?” Rooster returned, wincing a bit.

“I assure you that we’ve seen and heard plenty of stories far stranger than an ear infection from first time parents,” Dr. Greene chuckled, gathering his things. “Kids get sick. It happens. And you did the right thing in getting her to a medical professional. The antibiotics should be ready at the pharmacy and they should clear it up. But if she’s still sick in three days, go to your primary care physician.”

Dr. Greene turned to leave the room before pausing and turning back to Rooster one last time.

“And to be perfectly honest with you, I would highly prefer a parent who was overly concerned with their child’s health than one who wasn’t concerned at all. You’re doing fine,” Dr. Greene assured Rooster with a small smile before opening the door. “Have a good night.”

“Thanks, you too,” Rooster called back, finally able to breathe a bit again.

It was just an ear infection. He didn’t screw up. He did the right thing.

“Let’s get you some medicine, Dove,” Rooster sighed, setting his daughter back into her carrier.

The Dr. Greene that I may or may not have had in mind:

#rooster fanfic #bradley rooster bradshaw #bradley bradshaw #rooster #dadley dadshaw #top gun fanfiction #top gun maverick #top gun: maverick #tgm #tgm fanfiction #top gun #bradley bradshaw imagine #bradley bradshaw fanfiction #bradley bradshaw fic #rooster x wife!reader #rooster bradshaw fic #bradley bradshaw x wife!reader

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princessconsuela120 · 5 months ago

Text

Chapter Five: Time —❃

series masterlist

Chapter warnings: light cursing, mentions of pregnancy, death, everything that comes with euphoria

Author's note: Is was the first chapter for this book I ever wrote!! As always, italics are flashbacks to moments they had during teotfw that I just didn’t write. Enjoy!!

—❃

“Do you like kids?” Alyssa asked, glancing over at fezco as the two sat together on the beach. They had been sitting on the beach watching the stars at her dads house, one of the more peaceful moments they had together before they got caught. Besides, Alyssa believed the stars always looked more beautiful reflected on the water.

“Hmm?” He hummed, look looking away from the sky as he drew careful patterns with his eyes.

“Kids, ya like em?” She said, sighing as she thought back to her family. Truth is she missed them, as much as she hated to admit it. After finding out she had a hidden brother, Alyssa had been feeling a lot of different emotions. She had thought about kids, and if she would ever want them.

“Depends on the kid. My brother’s pretty chill.” Fezco replied, making Alyssa nod. She knew he missed ashtray, she also knew that seeing a boy around his age probably made him miss him more.

“That's right. I don't think I want kids.”

He looked over at her with furrowed eyebrows when she blurted out the last part.

“Why not ma?” He asked softly, making Alyssa sigh.

“Just more a chance ill fuck them up.” She mumbled, hugging her knees to her chest as fezco shrugged.

“I don't see it that way. You know? It's like, a chance to start new.” He explained, making Alyssa nod. She never thought of it taht way. Truthfully, she didn’t want kids.

“I guess. But kids are a lot of work. My siblings are just whiny babies.” She explained, making Fezco chuckle. “Their heads do smell nice though.”

“Yeah, I guess that's a plus.”

They let a silence pass by, followed by the quiet sounds of waves from the beach. Alyssa looked over at him, watching the starlight shine against his blue eyes. She had rethought a lot of things after meeting fez, she wondered what else might change because of him.

“Would you ever want kids Fez?” She asked gently, making him shrug.

“You know, i haven't really thought of that. I guess i wont know until, until i meet the right moma for my kid.” Ge explained, and she nodded in agreement, hugging her knees closer as she rest her chin against her knee.

“Yeah.” She sighed, letting the air reset her brain as she thought silently. “Fez?”

“Yeah ma?”

“Would you ever want kids with me?” She asked, and Fezco’s face turned a bright red shade. She didn’t know why she asked, she wasn’t sure, but she knew it had something to do with the comfort and safety she felt when she was around him. The warmth he brought.

“Shit ma, maybe we should focus on escaping the police first.”

“Yeah, I guess you're right.”

She took that as a no, that he wouldn't want kids witty her. How could he? She knew any kid she had would just turn out like her. As much as she could try, try to be better than her parents, she'd think it'd be almost like a curse that loomed over their heads. Who would want her as a mom?

—❃

“Fez, we gotta talk.” Alyssa said, urgently running into Fezco’s apartment. He did a double take as she ran in, having been anticipating mouse’s a rival after the police raided his house.

“Lyss, whatchu doin here. I told you to stay home.” He said, having prewarned her not to turn up.

“I know but um, it’s really important.”

Both their head whipped to the door when a loud pounding was heard.

“Open up boy!” Mouse’s voice called from the other end, making Alyssa’s heart drop.

“I swear to god Alyssa you better be tellin me you’re dyin or some shit or I swear to..”

“Im pregnant.” She said, interrupting him. And there he stood x his jaw slightly agape trying to process the words she had just said.

“Huh?”

“Fez! They’re comin in!” Ashtray said, pulling Fezco out of his day dream as he jaw remained open.

“What do we have here? Am I interrupting?” Mouse asked, raising his eyebrows teasingly making Alyssa shudder.

“No, no not at all, scary man.” She said, whispering the last bit to fezco.

“Stay behind me ma.” He said protectively, carefully pushing her behind him.

“No need to hide doll. Come on out.” Mouse tutted, smiling disgustingly at me as I stepped out slightly.

“Hey, she ain’t botherin nobody.” Fezco said protectively, clenching his fists.

“I just want her to step out the shadows, yeah? No need for daddy’s protection is there.” Mouse flicked his fingers for me to come to him as fezco shuddered at his comment.

That one was a little too soon.

“Go to my room ma, just wait for me to…”

“No one’s going nowhere. Now sit.” He patted the spot beside him. “Come on doll, I don’t bite.”

She looked to fezco worriedly, and he nodded at her to let her know he was nearby, with protection.

At Least he used protection this time. What too soon?

“I heard you got raided.” Mouse said, placing a hand on Alyssa’s thigh, making Fez’s fists clenched.

“Yeah. They didn’t find nothin though.” Fezco replied, hoping to get mouse to leave without any problems.

“I’d hope not.”

“We good?”

“I don’t know, are we good doll?” He began running his fingers down my face, making her whole body shiver before she heard Ashtray yell loudly.

“Take one move closer and I swear to god I’ll smash your fucking head off!” Ashtray shouted,before finally deciding to smash him over the head, and also smash off Custers nose making Custer scream in pain. And suddenly I was there again. I’m the house, and by the look in his eyes, so was Fez. We both looked at each other knowingly before back at Ashtray pleadingly.

“Yo, bro, what the fuck!” He said, tan his hands down his head before looking at Alyssa who had the same look on her face. “What the fuck is goin on in this house!?” He shook his head, looking at the scene before him. Me in shock, pregnant with his baby, ashtray in shock, having just committed murder, Custer screaming in pain from his nose being smashed off, and mouse dead.

“Yo, what the fuck.”

#fezco x reader #fezco euphoria #fezco #fez #euphoria x reader #euphoria #angus cloud x reader #angus cloud

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sunnyie-eve · 7 months ago

Text

31 | In the Mind

Series: Indispensable | Teen Wolf

Paring: (Stiles Stilinski x OFC Martin)

Word Count: 1.9k

Warnings: night terrors

| MASTERLIST |

"You got yourself some guard dogs, I see." Julia laughs seeing Ethan and Aiden with Scott, "Guys, give him some space." She looks at them.

"Thank you. Now let's go catch Stiles up on last night." Scott grabs Julia's arm dragging her along with him.

In the Chemistry classroom, Stiles is alarmed to find that the writing on the chalkboard is gone as is the extra key from his ring. He asks Scott that he showed him the key but Scott said he only told him about it.

"But I saw it last night, Scott." Julia tells him to back up Stiles.

Stiles confesses to them that he believes he allowed Barrow into the Chemistry closet and then wrote a message to the killer on the chalkboard. Stiles had even found an old story about Barrow's attack on the school bus. The killer apparently packed nuts, bolts, and screws along with the bomb in a box wrapped as a birthday present.

"What does that sound like to you?" Stiles looks at them.

Scott says he doesn't believe that Stiles is trying to kill people. Then says Stiles looks tired and needs to take a sick day.

"You do look terrible." Julia says as Scott leaves the room, "Want me to drive you home? I can skip since I'm passing all my classes now." She offers.

"Can you drive me to the hospital instead? Maybe if I see my doctor..."

"Yeah, I can do that." She takes the keys out of his hand as he holds them out to her.

Driving to the hospital, Julia kept glancing over at Stiles looking out the window, "I'm sure there's an explanation, Stiles. Like Scott, I don't think you're trying to kill anyone on purpose. And I believe you about everything. That day when we saw the writing on the board... I did kinda think it was your handwriting so I do believe you. Like I said, I'm sure there's an explanation."

Once at the hospital Melissa explains that Dr. Gardner isn't back until next week then tells Stiles he can see one of the hospital's urgent care doctors. Stiles start to panic so Melissa and Julia try to calm him down.

Melissa takes him to an exam room where he explains to her the anxiety, panic attacks, sleeplessness, sleepwalking, and blackouts. He tells her his Adderall isn't working and he is feeling irritable to the point of homicide with vivid dreams during the day.

"Wait, so the other day, you were just up afterwards during our sleepover?" Julia asks him so he nods his head, "You should have told me how much you've been not sleeping."

Melissa gives Stiles Midazolam - a common drug used to relax patients before surgery which makes him hold Julia's hand since he hates needles. She says he is profoundly sleep deprived. As he is dozing off, he calls Melissa Mom.

"He's lucky he has you by his side." Melissa tells Julia as she takes a seat in the chair so Julia just nods her head as Melissa leaves.

Julia tries to get comfortable while she keeps an eye on Stiles sleeping. Slowly she doses off to sleep as well hoping that Stiles will be okay. She hated seeing him like that. Julia wakes up a few hours later to see it was gonna be dark soon. Since the chair wasn't the comfiest thing in the world, she gets up going to crawl in the hospital bed with Stiles. Even though he was out like a light he had a feeling it was her so he puts an arm around her as she cuddles into him falling back to sleep.

As both were sleeping, Melissa goes to check up on Stiles to see the two of them making her smile, "Now I really see what Noah means." She closes the door.

Julia only wakes up because she feels Stiles gets up, "Are you okay?" She sits up as he gets out of bed.

"I'm fine. I'll be right back." He leaves the room confusing her.

After a few seconds of having an odd feeling she gets out of the bed to go look for him, "Stiles?" She walks the halls, "Stiles, where did you go?" She speed walks around till she runs into Scott.

"Where's Stiles?"

"He left the room and I'm looking for him now." Julia says as they hear a thud then find Stiles alone in the middle of a room.

"Stiles, you okay?" Scott asks him so he turns at to face the two.

"Yeah, fine. What's been going on?" He asks him walking over and Julia just thought something seemed off. As the guys walk out Julia looks around the room, "Julia?" Stiles calls her name, "Come on." He puts his hand out for her.

"Hey, I'm heading out." Lydia pops into Julia's room.

"Isn't it a bit late?"

"Yeah, but I'm heading to school to meet with Aiden. He's going to model for me so I can sketch him." Lydia slightly smiles.

"Oh, well have fun." Julia waves goodbye as she gets up to get a book off her shelf to read since she was bored.

While reading and having music play in the background she starts to hear quiet whispers. Getting up she goes towards her radio turning it up focusing on the voices, "Help me, please." She listens hearing Stiles, "It's so cold."

Quickly Julia grabs her phone calling Stiles and he picks up on the last ring as she gets dressed to go to his house, "Julia, I'm scared. I don't know where I am. I can't see and my eyes are watering. My leg hurts and I can't move. Please, Julia. I believe you can find me." The call cuts out so Julia rushes out of the house talking her mom's car since she still doesn't have a car.

Rushing into Stiles' house with the copy of his key he gave her, she runs up to his room to see his murder broad had more red string that was tied to scissors stabbed into his bed.

"What the hell?" She closes the door going over to it all.

The door opens to reveal Lydia and Aiden, "Did you hear it too?" She asks Julia.

"Yeah, and I called him as well." Julia looks at the board hoping to find something.

This time Scott and Isaac burst into Stiles' bedroom surprised to see the sisters and Aiden, "Did he call y'all too?"

"No, we heard it. Then Julia called him as well." Lydia tells him.

After seeing Stiles murder wall Aiden says that Stiles thinks he is part of an unsolved case. Isaac then thinks it's more direct saying Stiles believes he is an unsolved case.

Scott and Isaac catch the other us up on Stiles' description of his surroundings and his injures. Aiden points out that it is to be the coldest night of the year with temperatures in the 20s and that Stiles' jeep is gone suggesting he was more than just sleepwalking.

Scott says that he promised not to tell Noah about Stiles making the girls say the cops need to help find him as well, "You guys remember they get theses feeling when someone's about to die, right?" Aiden reminds them.

Scott and Isaac go to the station to tell Noah while the other three stay to try to find something to help give them any idea of where Stiles is.

The sisters look at the wall trying to find something while Aiden goes through Stiles stuff on his dresser, "Julia, did you draw this?" Aiden shows her.

"Yeah, he asked for one since I drew a lot." She turns back to the wall.

"He likes you a lot, doesn't he?"

"I don't know honestly. It's confusing right now with things that have happened between us." She moves her hand around towards him to leave her alone.

"Huh?"

"They slept together." Lydia sings causing Julia to turn around to face them.

"Let's just tell everyone shall we. I accidentally told Isaac at Danny's party so now we just have Scott, Allison, Derek, Ethan, and Kira to tell left. Oh, and Noah and Melissa." Julia huffs while Lydia gets an update from Scott.

Aiden ends up touching a string making it vibrate and the girls start to hear voices, "What did you just do?" Lydia asks him, "Did you touch one of the stings?"

"Maybe."

Lydia does it now and they hear more voices but Aiden couldn't like them, "Something about a house." Lydia looks over the wall, "That one."

"What's Eichen House?" Aiden asks.

"A mental health center." Julia tells him.

As the Lydia and Aiden talk, Julia messes with the string more, "All in his head." A whisper comes through, "There but not there." Another adds.

"Let's go, Julia." Lydia and Aiden rush out while Julia stays in the room thinking it all over.

"There but no there? All in his head?" Julia talks to herself taking a seat on the bed. "Okay, he's cold. He can't see. His eyes are watering. He was sleepwalking..." She thinks it over, "What if he's still sleeping?" A thought comes up in her head so she heads out to the coyote den.

As she gets out of her car, Rafael and Melissa pull up, "Julia?" Melissa walks over to her.

"I had this thought since he was sleep walking and all the stuff he's going through. He said his eyes were watering and that he was cold so." She said as Rafael goes in the den and finds Stiles.

Pulling him out Stiles screams as Melissa holds him trying to calm him down, "Stiles, you're all right! Okay!"

He looks around to see her, Rafael, and Julia helping him, "You're alright, Stiles," Julia grabs his hand, "You're okay now." She says so he leans out of Melissa touch to lean into Julia's chest breathing heavily. She wraps her arms around him holding him closer to him rubbing his back, "I did it like you told me." She whispers rocking them.

"We should get him to the hospital." Rafael tells Melissa and Julia.

"Come on, you two. I'll ride with you two." Melissa tells Julia and they head to the hospital and let Noah and the others know they found Stiles.

At the hospital Stiles sleeps while everyone talks outside the room. Melissa tells the kids they have school less than six hours and to go home. Scott and Lydia walk away but Julia doesn't move, "Julia, go get some sleep." Melissa tells her.

"I'm not going. I'm passing so who cares if I miss school. He believed in me that I would find him and I did. I'm not leaving his side... Noah, you understand." She looks at him with teary eyes.

"Okay, I'll let your mother know you're here for Stiles." He walks off.

Melissa takes a seat next to Julia, "Did you believe Lydia about where Stiles was?"

"Sorta, the voices told me it was all in his head and that he was there but wasn't there. That got me thinking that in his mind he was there but physical he wasn't. So that makes me wonder if Eichen House will play apart in things at some point. I just have this feeling."

"I'm gonna get some another chair to put in his room for you." Melissa gets up walking away so Julia goes into Stiles' room.

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oddeyevibes · 1 month ago

Text

Summary: A Flashback chapter in which you hear a terrible rumor about Ichiban.

A/N: Honestly didn't realize I never uploaded this to Tumblr.

Then

The matter was urgent.

You didn’t care about the looks from other people.

You needed to find Ichiban.

The day started normally enough until you found Ichiban’s wallet on the ground. No money, but his ID in there, bold as day.

On any other day, this might have instantly caused some concern, you chalked it up to him simply enjoying himself. It was also his birthday after all. You figured he and Mitsuo got shitfaced.

So you had set off to find and return his wallet to him. That’s when you heard a terrible rumor. At least…you hoped it was a rumor. Bad gossip always makes the rounds just as much as good gossip.

Ichiban killed someone last night .

When one of your mother’s coworkers told you that, you felt your heart drop. Ichiban? A murderer?

‘That can’t be.’ You remembered thinking.

Ichiban’s the type that’s always caught off guard when betrayals happen in crime dramas and now you’re supposed to believe he took someone’s life.

When you stopped by the cigarette shop, the old lady told you the same thing. Of course, she made a slight harsh comment about it when she saw your worried expression.

“ It was only a matter of time, Y/N-Chan. He’s Yakuza, after all .”

Then you ran to Michiyo. Unsurprisingly, she wasn’t much help. Almost as wasted as her customers and in her inebriated state, she gave the worst advice someone could give a teen going through emotional turmoil looking for their friend: check the Arakawa family office .

So you went. Barreling through the streets of Kamurocho, ignoring the dirty looks and profanity people shouted at you for rubbing into them. Only one of them actually stopped you, Mitsuo.

“Hey, hey! Slow down, Y/N. What’s wrong?” He looked behind you, worried you were being chased.

You struggled to catch your breath before speaking. “Tell me everyone’s lying.”

He shrugged, clearly lost on what you’re on about. “Lying? About what?”

“Everyone’s saying Ichiban was arrested. That he killed somebody last night.”

The look on Mitsuo’s face said a lot. He was just as in the dark as you were, if not more. He was deep in thought before a look of dreaded realization washed over him.

“Oh shit!” He hissed. “I called him earlier and he started spouting some nonsense about how old we’ll be in the future. I thought he was just being sentimental cause of his birthday but…” Then he focused back on you, noticing the tears forming in your eyes. “Listen, Y/N, there has to be a misunderstanding. Ichi wouldn’t do that.”

“I know! Why is he going to jail?”

“I don’t know, Y/N…maybe they got the wrong guy. Listen, I’ll talk to Arakawa-san. You just get back home—HEY!”

You bolted off into the direction of the Arakawa family offices, Mitsuo chasing after you.

Standing in front of the office was none other than the captain that Ichiban and Mitsuo reported to: Jo Sawashiro, smoking a cigarette.

“Y/N, slow down!” Mitsuo shouted, drawing the attention of Sawashiro.

The older man turned in your direction, instantly recognizing you. The kid that Ichiban kept hanging around. Another example of Ichiban’s negligence as a Yakuza in his eyes.

You stopped in front of the man, breathing heavily as he eyed you with an unreadable expression. He then looked past you to Mitsuo.

“Mitsuo…what the hell is this?” He asked. He spoke with his usual stern tone. “Get this kid out of here.”

“Yes sir!”

“No! Where’s Ichiban?”

He didn’t reply. Merely staring you down in an attempt to scare you but despite the mixture of fear and confusion, you stood your ground…and he respected that. Instead, he looked back at Mitsuo, gesturing his head in your direction, silently urging his subordinate to carry out his orders. Mitsuo went to gently grab your arm but you instantly snatched it out of his grip.

“You don’t get to send me away!” You yelled. “Tell me where Ichiban is!”

‘The audacity.’ Sawashiro thought. As much as he wanted to tell you off, he smirked. “You’re running through the street making a scene. You obviously know. Why don’t you tell me… boss ?”

“Everyone’s saying that Ichiban… killed someone last night. But I know it’s not true. Ichiban would never do something like that so then why is he going to jail?!” There was so much firmness in your yell as the tears let loose and began sliding down your face. To be honest, you looked like you could pass out any second but in your mind, you needed to be awake to help Ichiban if you could.

“If that’s the word on the street then I guess it’s true then…Ichiban’s a cold-blooded killer.”

He was teasing you. You knew it. Mitsuo knew it.

“He’s nothing like that. He can’t even do a collection run like a normal Yakuza.” You reasoned.

“Maybe he’s an idiot savant.” He suggested, earning more of your ire. “Bad at collections…good at killing.”

“SHUT UP! You’re lying! Ichiban would never take someone’s life!”

Sawashiro finally got fed up. “Listen, you little brat, how well do you know Ichiban? How can you say he would never do something like that? You only know what he shows you.”

“Captain…” Mitsuo interjects before you can shoot something back. “What… did happen last night?”

Sawashiro scoffed. “Yasumura…why is she still standing in front of me?”

“But what about--”

Sawashiro said nothing but gave him a stern and threatening look. One that said, pry anymore and you’ll be losing part of your finger and Mitsuo knew Sawashiro was just petty enough to do it, especially with Mitsuo’s close proximity to Ichiban. Guilty by association and all that.

He was too focused on intimidating Mitsuo that he wasn’t ready for the hard shove he received from you. He had almost toppled over before catching himself, nearly dropping his cigarette as it happened. He felt his rage quickly build as he stared down at you ready to tell you off but the tears in your eyes were just flowing and he didn’t have the heart to do that all of a sudden.

You were some teenage idiot trailing behind another bigger idiot. You knew nothing true about this world and you probably had some black-and-white view of how things worked. He knew that if kept trying to poke fun at you, he’d eventually tell the truth, and while he could probably get away with just letting you in on it knowing no one would ever even try to believe you, he couldn’t with Mitsuo there.

He had to play it cool and collected to keep up the story. The story of him being the one that murdered someone last night and that Ichiban was covering for him by orders of Captain Arakawa. Maybe one day you’ll know but until then…

“What the hell is wrong with you?!” He shouted.

“YOU KNOW HE DIDN’T DO IT!” You were screaming now.

“Keep your voice down.” He hissed.

“You know he’s innocent and you’re letting him go to jail because you hate him. You’re nothing but a jerk! A petty jerk! You’d let an innocent man rot in jail knowing he doesn’t deserve it.”

“He got himself in there by himself. He thought he was a big man so he killed a member of someone else’s family. Now Arakawa can’t bail him out of this one.”

“HE DIDN’T DO IT!”

“What’s going on out here?” A calm voice came and tore through the rising tension. All three of you looked to see Masumi Arakawa standing there in his normal get-up with his signature fedora. Arakawa’s voice always made him sound calm and collected in a way that made other people nervous because they could never guess what was going on in his head. It was unnerving that way.

The Arakawa family head surveyed the current scene in front of him. Maybe in normal circumstances, he could laugh this off as simply Sawashiro letting a kid push his buttons. But under these circumstances, when he knew who you were and who you were here for…this talk was not going to have a happy ending.

“Jo…what’s going on?” He asked.

Sawashiro straightened himself up to give off the physical impression that he was not about to get into a verbal confrontation with someone that needed a hall pass to use the bathroom.

“Nothing sir, she was just--”

You pushed passed him to be face-to-face with Arakawa. The way Jo wanted to swing so bad but he knew better than that.

“Arakawa -san! Say it’s not true! About Ichiban! Everyone’s saying he killed someone but you know he could never do something like that.” You pleaded with the man.

Sawashiro’s teasing had nothing on the way Arakawa suddenly avoided your pleading gaze, tilting his hat down. That told you clearly. Even he’s in on it.

“Arakawa-san…?”

“Y/N…have you eaten yet?”

/////

You didn’t make much of a fuss about his request. You didn’t have any reason to not trust him but the energy of the whole walk was somber as the two of you just sat in initial silence as the sounds of small talk filled the cafe.

He opted to just let the two of you sit in silence while you waited for your meals. He wanted to let you have a moment to breathe. It was only when the server delivered your food and left that he started to talk with you.

“You know…Ichiban and I were supposed to get some Peking Duck last night…we had to settle for ramen since the place was closed. He was so excited, he almost made a scene shouting at the closed sign.” Arakawa chuckled.

You couldn’t help but crack a smile but that didn’t answer the questions you needed. Your lack of an audible laugh told Arakawa that. It broke his heart that he couldn’t tell you the truth. From what Ichiban told him about you, he babysat you and was practically a friend of you and your mother’s small family. And now…he would have to take that away. That hurt him deeply.

“You must be very close with Ichiban.”

You looked up at him with a somber doe-eyed expression but there was a break before you responded.

“Yeah…I guess so…he’s not really my babysitter anymore but my mom still tries to get him to come to the house. It’s her…really bad attempt at trying to get him out of crime…” you laughed. “She says he’s too good for that type of life.”

Arakawa smiled. “I would agree. The life of a Yakuza is a life of…taking advantage of the community around you.”

You shrugged. “Well, that’s not true. A lot of gangs start with the intent on protecting the communities they form in. It’s just…they all lose their way at some point.”

“That is true. You’re lucky to have such a caring mother.”

There was another beat of silence.

“How have you been doing in school? Ichiban told me you’re graduating this year. That’s good. It’s nice to see young people living up to their full potential. So many are lost in the cracks that oftentimes they have no choice but to find shelter in unsavory places. Do you know what you’ll do once you graduate?”

“Well…my mom wants me to go to college. I’ll have better opportunities to fall back on if something doesn’t work out. But I don’t really know what I wanna do after that. Seems like I’m always asked that but I never have an actual answer.” You let out a nervous chuckle. You hated that question so much.

“I’m hoping Masato changes his mind and does go to college. He’s a smart kid and he deserves a chance at showing that to the world.”

You didn’t say anything to that. You had no real opinion on Masato in general and what few times you did meet him when Ichiban was tending to him, he was kind of an asshole. You probably shouldn’t say that to his father right now though.

“Maybe he just needs time to think is all…or maybe some motivation. I mean, he probably thinks he doesn’t need or…deserve to do something with his life since he’s the son of a Yakuza boss maybe?”

“Ah…maybe so…” He seemed sad when you suggested that and you instantly felt guilty.

“I’m not trying to say that it’s your fault, Arakawa-san. It’s just that…the few times I have met him with Ichi, he always seems so…sad, you know?”

The man nodded. “I understand completely. Though I never know what I can ever do to reassure him that he has value in this world. I always try to tell him that he can make his own space without bending others’ notions of what he should be. I want him to live for himself but…it’s hard not to think that I’m holding him back sometimes.” Even with him pouring his heart out, the tone of his voice felt like a father’s reminiscing about fond memories with their kid.

You let out light laughter in an attempt to alleviate the tension. “Now I feel bad…the worst my mother and I fight about is how I’m trying to grow too fast. She wants me to go to college back in America so I can experience a chaotic youth like she did.”

Arakawa sat back with a laugh.

“Well, she didn’t say it like that but…she might as well have. I told her I’d feel out of place there. I mean…I’ve been here since I was practically a baby. But even then…it feels like I don’t have roots here either. I’m not even a foreigner but I get treated like one.”

Arakawa casually leaned upright. “Maybe… you’re scared of leaving because you think it’ll hold more weight to the notion that you don’t belong here.”

You nodded like a child caught red-handed. “I guess so.” You mumbling.

“Maybe you shouldn’t be living for these people. Maybe you should be living for yourself? Maybe that’s what your mother wants you to realize. I know it can sometimes sound like we parents are just…lecturing without understanding but often we do but…it’s been so long since we were young that we’ve forgotten how to say in a way that our children would understand. There’s a chance your mother can feel guilty because of how you feel and she wants you to find somewhere to place…your roots.”

“Maybe so…but…I think I just need time.”

“Of course. Life’s too short to force yourself onto one route. I think a lot of people forget that.”

You shrugged. “Well, it’s hard for people to remember when everything around them is constantly telling them to be this way like it’s…life and death. People’s hands are being forced every day. It’s a rat race out here.” Your eyes lingered outside the cafe’s window, watching busy bodies move past, not even taking the time to stop for anyone busking on the sidewalks.

You didn’t see the smile that Arakawa had on his face. Like a proud dad. You were a smart kid, clearly. You were gonna be alright with or without Ichiban.

“Arakawa-san…” you only spoke his name but the delivery told him what was going to come out of your mouth next. “What happened to Ichiban?” You didn’t bother to look back at him.

Arakawa was silent for a moment, mentally prepping himself for the question. Would he tell you the complete truth or half the truth? Would he even tell you at all?

“What happened to Ichiban?”

Still not looking at him. So he took a moment before replying. “He’s going to jail. He killed someone without orders…someone in another Tojo family—”

“You have to be lying.” You finally turned back to face him. “You and I both know Ichi couldn’t have something like that. There has to be more to the story. Maybe he defended himself and…it was an accident. He’s probably losing it right now. Murder is…intentional. It’s premeditated. He’s not a murderer, Arakawa-san, you know that.”

“…….I know. Maybe you’re right. It was an argument that got out of hand and maybe…Ichi took it too far.”

He was willing to indulge this idea if it meant that you would simply go home after all is said and done. He could see how desperate you were to rationalize the idea of Ichiban being….going to prison for murder.

“It’s not enough isn’t it. Nobody meant anything by it, right? I mean…your both Tojo clan…maybe they were just hanging out and got a little too drunk…were you there?” You asked him.

He shook his head. “No, after the Peking duck idea fell through, we went our separate ways for the night. I had hoped to see the ball drop with Masato but…”

“He’s not made for prison.”

……….

Arakawa looked down at his food.

“He’s hard headed but he’s got a soft heart.” You went on. “Can’t you do something, Arakawa-san?”

There was a tense pause before he replied to you. “I’m sorry. There’s nothing I can do. He’s no longer a part of the family.”

Hearing that broke you. Ichiban really was on his own. You didn’t even know what you could do to help him. You doubt any court or lawyer would actually help in the way he needed. Not to mention, this was Yakuza stuff and they would damn sure work to keep Ichiban in jail as retribution.

“If it is any consolation…Ichiban accepted his expulsion from the family. He knew the risks if he stayed. This punishment is his and his alone but so long as he keeps his head down, he’ll be fine. The years will go by in a flash.”

You let out a heavy sigh. There was no relief. Only sadness.

“I have a feeling you’ll be fine. So long as you focus on yourself much like your mother wants, you’ll lead a good life.”

“My best friend is going to jail, Arakawa-san.”

“If Ichi were to know you were panicking, that’s all he'd do during his time.” That clearly didn’t satisfy you. He folded his hands and placed them on the table. “Right now, Ichiban will need you to be strong. Do you think you can do that?”

There was a moment of contemplation before you nodded.

“I promise, I will do everything in my power to make sure Ichiban is safe inside. That is my part. Do you know what yours is?”

You nodded again.

“Good.” He then extended a hand, signaling for yours.

Your hand gripped his in a lackluster manner that was only shooed away when you realized how firm his was compared to your own.

“Your mother has no doubt probably heard this. We should probably get you home. Alright?”

“….ok.”

#Ichiban x reader #LaDrabble #Sawashiro was dead ass gonna box a child

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