#and we don’t know them so there is no right or wrong way to write anyone so it’s all about who we imagine them to be

[harryssyndrome]

Hoax | h.s

summery: “don’t want no other shade blue but you. No other sadness in the world would do…”

based off this request. Thank you so much anon for this idea, this was so fun writing and I hope it’s something you were looking for. I tried to be as angsty as possible with a blend of cutesy sweet, hope it’s a perfect mix. Let me know in the comments? [thank you! mwah mwah mwah 💋]

Posted on: November 26th, 2024. I DO NOT GIVE PERMISSION TO COPY OR TRANSLATE MY WORK IN ANY PLATFORM. Like, comment & reblog are appreciated 💓Italics are past memories. Hope you lovelies enjoy this little big piece.

wc: 6.6k (oops🤭) || Masterlist 🤍

Tag-List: @fruity-harry @angeldavis777 @wheredidmyeyesgo | TAGLIST IS OPEN! || REQUESTS ARE OPEN!! 💌

The morning had started just like any other, the sun streaming in through the kitchen window, casting a warm glow over everything, but YN barely noticed. She sat at the counter, her hands curled around a coffee mug, its warmth barely a match for the cold ache building inside her. The apartment felt empty, despite the soft hum of the city just outside the window. She could feel the weight of the silence pressing down on her, a silence that had grown more oppressive over the past few weeks.

Harry had been on tour for what seemed like forever now, and their communication had dwindled. What had once been late-night calls and stolen moments between sound checks had turned into rushed, distracted conversations, where he was either too busy or too tired to give her his full attention. YN had always known the demands of his career, had always been willing to share him with the world, but it was starting to feel like he was slipping further away from her.

She had tried to be understanding, tried to remind herself that this was just a phase—that he was only gone for a while, and they would find their way back to each other. But today felt different. Something in the air was charged with tension, a sense of dread that hung around her like a cloud. Harry had promised to call her during his break between rehearsals, and as the minutes ticked by, that sense of unease only grew. She hadn’t heard from him, not even a text to explain why.

When the phone finally rang, she grabbed it with an anxious breath, hoping for the reassurance she so desperately needed.

“Hey, babe,” Harry’s voice crackled through the phone, distant and strained. There was a tiredness in his voice that made her heart ache even more.

“Hi,” she replied softly, trying to keep her tone light, but the worry slipped out anyway. “I was starting to wonder if you forgot about me.”

Harry didn’t immediately answer, and YN could feel him shifting on the other end, perhaps looking for the right words, or maybe just gathering the energy to engage with her. “I didn’t forget,” he said after a beat, his voice uncharacteristically flat. “It’s just… things are hectic right now. You know how it is.”

YN frowned, her fingers tightening around her mug. She knew how it was. She knew that Harry’s tour schedule was demanding, that he barely had time to breathe, let alone talk to her. But it was different now. It had been different for weeks, and she couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong.

“I get it, Harry,” she said softly, trying to keep the frustration from her voice. “But it feels like we haven’t really talked in days. I feel like I’m losing you.”

The words hung in the air between them, thick with unspoken emotions. She didn’t want to say it. She didn’t want to accuse him of pulling away, but she couldn’t ignore what was happening anymore. She missed him. She missed the way they used to connect, how they’d stay up all night talking about their dreams and fears, how they’d laugh until their stomachs ached. Now, it felt like all they did was talk about logistics and time zones. She wanted more than that.

Harry let out a heavy sigh, and for a moment, she thought he was going to apologize, that he would offer the comfort she so desperately needed. But instead, his voice grew colder, his words sharper. “You miss me? Maybe you miss the version of me that you had before all of this. But I’m not the same person anymore, YNN. I’m just tired. Tired of feeling like I’m constantly being pulled in a million directions.”

Her heart sank at his words, the finality in them hitting her harder than she had expected. “What does that mean?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

Harry’s words came out in a rush, almost like he couldn’t stop them, as if they were coming from a place deeper than he intended. “It means that I don’t have the energy for this right now. I don’t have the energy to keep pretending that everything is fine when it’s not. And maybe I’m just tired of pretending that you’re not asking for more than I can give. Maybe I need space. Maybe we both need space.”

The words stabbed her. She felt them deep in her chest, each one like a dagger, twisting further with every breath. “Space?” she echoed, barely able to form the word, the hurt creeping into her voice despite her best efforts to hold it back. “I’m not asking for space, Harry. I’m just asking for you. For the person you promised me you’d always be.”

Harry didn’t respond right away, and when he did, his voice was tight, defensive. “Maybe that person isn’t here anymore, YNN. Maybe that’s what I’m trying to say.”

The silence that followed was suffocating. YN could hear the faint rustling of something on his end of the phone, the noise of people moving in the background, but it didn’t matter. The emptiness between them felt so loud, so unbearable. The connection that once held them together was fraying, thread by thread.

She swallowed hard, the tears welling in her eyes. “Fine,” she said, her voice breaking as she spoke. “If that’s how you feel, then I guess I’ll leave.”

The words came out before she could stop them, and she immediately regretted them. But the damage was done. The silence that followed was deafening, and the weight of Harry’s absence felt so heavy, so crushing, that she could barely breathe. The person she loved, the person she had given everything to, had just told her he was done. He was tired of her.

Before she could say another word, she ended the call. The click of the phone disconnecting felt like the final nail in the coffin, sealing whatever it was that they had left.

YN sat there for a long moment, staring at the phone in her hand as if it were some foreign object. She couldn’t move, couldn’t speak. Her mind was numb, her thoughts tangled in confusion and hurt. The apartment, their shared space, felt so small now. It felt suffocating. Every corner of the place was a reminder of everything that had once been good, everything that was now falling apart.

Tears blurred her vision as she stood up from the counter. She didn’t know what to do. She didn’t know where to go. But she couldn’t stay there. Not with him, not with the words he had just said. The love they had built felt like ashes, and she couldn’t breathe in the smoke any longer.

She started packing her things, her movements automatic, like she was on autopilot. Her hands shook as she threw clothes into a bag, not caring if they matched or if they were folded neatly. Nothing mattered in that moment except the urgent need to get away from the place that had once been home. She ignored the phone buzzing with messages, messages from Harry, apologizing, pleading with her to call him back. She couldn’t. Not yet. Not after the things he had said.

When she finished packing, she grabbed her bags and walked out the door. The apartment felt even emptier as she closed the door behind her. There were no more goodbyes, no more promises. Just the echo of his hurtful words ringing in her ears.

YN drove to her parents’ house in a daze, her eyes stinging with unshed tears. She couldn’t stop thinking about everything that had happened, about how quickly their love had unraveled. She needed space to think. To breathe. To figure out how to move on from this. But deep down, she knew it wasn’t that simple.

It wasn’t just a fight. It was something deeper. Something that couldn’t be fixed with apologies.

When she pulled into the driveway, she didn’t feel the relief she thought she would. Instead, the silence that had followed her from their apartment seemed to follow her here. Even the familiar sight of her childhood home didn’t offer the comfort it once had. It all felt distant. Empty. Just like her heart.

She stepped out of the car, closing the door behind her with a soft click. As she walked up to the front door, her phone buzzed again. She ignored it. She couldn’t bear to look at it. She couldn’t bear to see his name flashing on the screen. The man she loved had just shattered her heart into a million pieces, and she didn’t know how to pick them up.

The night had been a blur for Harry. The anger, the disappointment, the gnawing guilt in his chest from the argument with YN—it was all too much to bear. In the solitude of his hotel room, far from her, he drowned out the pain with alcohol. He knew he had messed up, knew he had hurt her with his words, but the overwhelming pressure of being on tour, the constant demand of being a public figure, and the exhaustion had driven him to the brink. He had never intended for it to escalate the way it did, but in his drunken haze, it all came crashing down.

Somewhere between the blurry shots and the endless stream of drinks, he found himself in a bar, surrounded by strangers, feeling more alone than he had in a long time. His phone was buzzing on the table, the screen lighting up with YN’s name flashing, but he didn’t pick it up. The coldness in his heart had become too unbearable, and he pushed her away instead of confronting the hurt he had caused. He just wanted the world to stop spinning for a moment. He wanted to forget everything that had gone wrong.

And that was when Emily Ratajkowski had walked in.

They had known each other for years, casually friendly in the way celebrities often are when their circles overlap. Emily, ever the charmer, had greeted Harry with a friendly smile. They sat and talked, their conversation casual at first, just the usual small talk about work and life. But Harry, caught in his haze of regret, had let his guard down. The more they talked, the more the words flowed. In some strange way, it felt easy to talk to her—like she was a stranger he could confide in, someone who didn’t carry the same weight of their past, the years of intimacy and history he shared with YN.

It didn’t take long before the alcohol took its toll. Emily’s laughter had filled the air, and Harry had found himself leaning closer, her presence soothing in a way that made him forget the ache in his chest. Before he knew it, they were kissing. His mind screamed for him to stop, to think about YN, to remember everything he stood to lose. But in that moment, he didn’t. The guilt had been smothered by the fleeting comfort of the kiss, the escape from his spiraling thoughts.

He didn’t remember much after that. The night blurred into incoherence, a jumble of laughter, flashes, and fleeting touches. Harry woke up the next morning, disoriented and groggy, the light filtering through the hotel room window far too bright. His phone was buzzing incessantly, and his stomach churned when he saw the series of missed calls and messages from YN. The weight of it all hit him like a wave, and for a moment, he just sat there, trying to piece together the fragments of his memories.

Then, his phone lit up with an alert—a notification from a gossip website, and his heart dropped into his stomach. There, in front of him, were pictures of him and Emily Ratajkowski, the kind of photos Harry had spent years avoiding. They were kissing, their lips pressed together, captured in a moment of reckless abandon that Harry didn’t even fully remember. The headline was cruel: Harry Styles and Emily Ratajkowski—A New Romance in the Making?

His throat tightened as he scrolled through the photos, his mind racing. He didn’t remember kissing her. He didn’t remember anything about that night except the overwhelming sense of regret that now gripped him. He had ruined everything. The fragile thread holding him together seemed to snap in that moment. He had lost YN, and now the media would make sure the world knew it. His personal life was on full display, and all he could think about was how much he had fucked it all up.

Desperation began to rise in his chest, and without thinking, he began sending text after text to YN, each one filled with apologies, regret, and pleas for her to talk to him. But she didn’t answer. The silence on the other end was deafening.

Meanwhile, YN was in her parents’ house, sitting in the living room with the muted glow of the television casting long shadows across the room. The house, once a place of comfort and warmth, now felt suffocating. Her mother had been quiet ever since YN arrived, sensing the heavy tension in the air. She tried to comfort her daughter, offering tea, but YN couldn’t bring herself to care. The weight of the argument, of the harsh words Harry had said, sat heavily in her chest, gnawing at her.

But when the photos surfaced—when she saw Harry with Emily, their lips locked, the headlines flashing across her phone—her world shattered all over again. The room spun around her, and she felt like she was suffocating. The love she had poured into her relationship with Harry now felt like a cruel joke. She had trusted him. She had believed in him. And now this—this betrayal was too much to bear.

Tears blurred her vision, and she quickly turned away from her phone. Her mother noticed the change in her expression and asked softly, “YN, what’s wrong, sweetheart?”

“I can’t do this,” YN whispered, choking on her tears. “I can’t keep doing this. I thought he loved me… but now… now I don’t know who he is anymore. It didn’t even take him a night to move on?”

Her mother hugged her tightly, murmuring comforting words, but YN couldn’t hear them. The pain of what she had seen—the public humiliation of it all—felt like a physical weight on her chest. She needed to get away. She needed to clear her head.

“I’m going for a walk,” she said, her voice distant, as if she were speaking to herself rather than her mother.

Her mother nodded, understanding the need for space, and watched as YN stepped outside, the cool evening air wrapping around her like a blanket.

The lake stretched out before her, calm and unbothered by the storm raging inside her. Its surface shimmered faintly under the overcast sky, the golden light of the fading afternoon barely breaking through the thick clouds. The familiar sight of it— the way the trees reflected on the water, the distant sound of birds, the rhythmic lapping of waves against the shore-should have brought YN the comfort she was seeking. But all it did was make her chest tighten with a suffocating ache.

She had always come to this place for solace, even as a child. The lake by her parents' house was her sanctuary, a space where the noise of the world couldn't touch her. But now, as she stood there, arms wrapped tightly around herself against the crisp autumn air, the silence was deafening. It wasn't peace she found here today. It was the echo of memories she had desperately tried to bury since she walked out of the home she had once shared with Harry.

Her boots crunched softly against the earth as she made her way closer to the water's edge, the damp grass soaking the hem of her dress. The wind whispered through the trees, carrying with it the faintest scent of pine and earth. But YN didn't notice. Her mind was far away, replaying a reel of memories she wished she could turn off. No matter how much she tried to focus on the present, her past with Harry came rushing back to her, vivid and bittersweet.

She crouched down near the shore, her fingertips brushing against the cool surface of the water. As ripples spread outward, her thoughts drifted to another time, another version of herself-a happier one. She closed her eyes, and it all came rushing back as if she were still there.

It had been a summer evening, the sun setting in brilliant hues of orange and pink.

Harry had been sitting on the dock, legs stretched out, his feet just barely skimming the water. YN had been lying beside him, her head resting on his thigh as they shared a bottle of wine they had stolen from her parents' pantry. The lake had been their escape that summer, a place where the chaos of Harry's career and the pressures of the world seemed to melt away.

"This place is magic," Harry had murmured, running his fingers absentmindedly through her hair. His voice had been low, almost reverent, as he looked out at the water.

YN had tilted her head to glance up at him, a smile tugging at her lips. "You always say that," she teased. "But you're not wrong."

He grinned, his dimple deepening as he looked down at her. "It's true, though. Don't you feel it? It's like... time stops here. Like nothing bad can touch us."

She had laughed softly, the sound blending with the gentle rustle of the trees.

"That's what l've always loved about this place. It's quiet. Peaceful. Away from everything."

Harry had hummed in agreement, his gaze softening as he studied her. "One day, YNN... one day l'd love to settle down somewhere like this. Away from the noise. Just us."

Her breath had caught at his words, her heart skipping a beat. "Just us?" she'd asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

"Well," he'd added, his lips twitching into a playful smile, "maybe not just us. I'm thinking a couple of little ones running around, maybe a dog... or two."

YN's heart skipped at his words, her stomach flipping in that way it always did when he hinted at their future. She laughed, nudging him playfully. "Little ones, huh? You planning on starting a family with me already, Styles?"

Harry grinned, his dimple showing as he leaned closer, the teasing glint in his eyes softening into something deeper. "Why not? I mean it, YNN. I'd love that. A house by the lake. Waking up every morning with you by my side. Teaching our kids how to fish or swim or whatever it is people do out here. It sounds perfect."

Her breath caught as she looked at him, the sincerity in his words tugging at something deep within her. "It does," she whispered, her voice barely audible. "It sounds perfect."

He reached out, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, his fingers lingering against her cheek. "You're perfect," he murmured, and before she could respond, he leaned in, pressing a soft, lingering kiss to her lips.

The world had faded away then, leaving only the two of them, wrapped in a bubble of love and possibility.

“I wouldn’t want anything less than forever when it comes to you.”

His words had settled into her heart like a warm glow, and she had leaned in to kiss him, the taste of wine still lingering on his lips. In that moment, with the sun setting and the world quiet around them, she had believed him. She had believed in forever.

YN blinked, the memory dissolving as the present came crashing back. The lake was still, the air cold, and Harry wasn't there. Her chest ached as she stared at the dock, the image of them sitting there overlaying the reality of its emptiness. She could almost hear his laughter, feel his hand in hers, but it was all in her mind.

The betrayal burned anew, the image of him with Emily flashing behind her eyes.

How could he have said those things, painted that picture of their future, and then so carelessly let it all fall apart? How could he kiss someone else after everything they had shared?

How had they gone from that to this? How had the man who once promised her forever ended up kissing someone else? The image of Harry and Emily flashed in her mind again, sharper this time, and her stomach twisted. She wrapped her arms tighter around herself, trying to hold together the pieces of her heart that felt like they were falling apart.

The lake, once her sanctuary, now felt like a cruel reminder of everything she had lost. The life she had envisioned with Harry-the house by the lake, the little ones running around, the forever they had dreamed of-felt like a distant, unattainable dream. And yet, no matter how much she wanted to hate him, to shut him out completely, her heart wouldn't let her. She still loved him, even now, even after everything.

YN sank down onto the grass, her knees pulled to her chest, tears streaming freely now. She thought of the countless nights they had spent talking about their dreams, their plans. The way Harry had once made her feel so safe, so sure of their love. And now, it all felt like a cruel joke, a dream turned nightmare.

"Why, Harry?" she whispered into the stillness. "Why did you have to ruin everything?"

The question hung in the air, unanswered, as the sun dipped lower on the horizon.

She let herself cry then, the sobs wracking her body as she finally allowed herself to feel the full weight of her heartbreak. The lake bore silent witness to her pain, its surface rippling gently as if trying to offer her some semblance of comfort.

The lake, once her sanctuary, now felt like a graveyard for their love.

When she returned to the house, her heart felt heavy, each step laden with the weight of everything she was feeling. But it wasn't the emptiness of the house that grabbed her attention; it was the faint sound-the small, deliberate taps against the window. At first, she thought it was the rain playing tricks on her, the gentle taps against the glass. But when she heard it again-sharp and insistent-her breath caught in her throat.

Her mind didn't even have time to process it fully. She spun toward the window, her heart pounding in her chest. And there he was.

Harry.

He stood in the pouring rain, his face pale, his hair clinging to his skin. His clothes were soaked through, and his hands trembled slightly as he threw small pebbles at the window, as if trying to wake her from a nightmare she couldn't escape. She stood frozen for a moment, unsure of what to do. Was this real? Was this the same man who had hurt her so badly?

But then, she saw it in his eyes-the desperation. The raw vulnerability. The silent plea for forgiveness that spoke louder than words ever could. He was standing there, drenched, with nothing left to lose. He was a broken man, and in that moment, she could see that he knew he had ruined everything.

Before she could stop herself, she ran to the down to the front door, threw it open, and without thinking, rushed outside into the rain.

The rain fell in torrents, its relentless downpour drowning out all sound except for the beat of water against the ground. Harry stood before YN, drenched, his eyes wide with desperate urgency, a look of raw pain etched into every line of his face. His clothes clung to his body, soaked through, but it was nothing compared to the turmoil inside of him.

“YN…” His voice broke, as if the weight of her name was too much to bear. His hand reached out shakily, desperate to bridge the gap between them, but she pulled away slightly. He flinched, not from her rejection, but from the weight of his own guilt that seemed to pull him lower with every passing second.

“I—” He took a breath, trying to steady himself, but his words tumbled out in a frantic rush. “I never meant for it to be this way. I never meant to hurt you, YNN. I swear, I never thought—God, I was so drunk, so damn stupid. I don’t even remember what happened, but I know I messed up. I know I messed everything up.”

YN’s heart clenched painfully in her chest. She wanted to scream at him, to tell him how much he had hurt her, how much his words still stung like a constant ache in her soul. But instead, she stood there, her breath coming in ragged bursts, staring at him as he trembled in the rain. She wasn’t sure whether it was the cold of the storm or the pain inside him that made him shudder, but it was impossible to ignore the depth of his regret.

“You do remember, Harry,” she finally spoke, her voice shaking but strong. “You remember everything, even if you don’t remember that moment. You remember the things you said to me. You remember how you treated me. How you—” She stopped herself, not wanting to continue with the painful words. But the memory of his cutting tone, his dismissive words, echoed in her mind, taunting her, making her question everything they had ever shared. “I trusted you. I loved you. And you—you broke me.”

Harry’s eyes welled with unshed tears as he took a step toward her, this time not caring if she pulled away. He was beyond caring about the rain, beyond caring about anything except for the woman standing before him, the one person who had always been his everything.

“I know,” he whispered, his voice thick with emotion, and she could see the raw vulnerability in his eyes. “I know I broke you. And that’s the worst part of it. I never wanted to hurt you. Not in a million years. I’ve never loved anyone the way I love you, YNN. You’re it for me, you always have been.” He reached for her again, but this time she didn’t pull away. His fingers brushed against hers, a tentative touch, as if he were afraid she might vanish the moment he let go.

“But I let my stupid insecurities, my stupid mistakes, cloud everything,” he continued, his voice cracking. “I’ve never been more scared of losing someone than I am of losing you, and I couldn’t see that until now. I couldn’t see that you are the one I need. That it’s not the fame, it’s not the tour, it’s not anyone or anything else—it’s you, YN. You’re the only thing that matters.”

The words hung in the air like fragile threads, each one trembling with a rawness that made Ashley’s heart ache in ways she didn’t think possible. The anger, the hurt—it was still there, simmering beneath the surface, but now there was something else too: hope. Hope that maybe, just maybe, this wasn’t all lost.

She swallowed hard, her throat dry. She wanted to push him away, wanted to shout at him for what he had done, but when she looked at him—really looked at him—there was something so devastatingly human about him, standing there, shaking in the rain. He was broken, but there was sincerity in his apology, a plea that reached her heart in ways his words never had before.

“You don’t even understand what you’ve done to me, Harry,” she said, her voice quivering as she took a step back. “You think it’s just about what happened with her, with Emily? It’s not. It’s about everything that led up to that moment. It’s about the words you said to me, the way you dismissed everything we had, everything I gave you. It’s about how you made me feel like I wasn’t enough.”

Harry closed his eyes, a silent tear slipping down his cheek. “I didn’t mean to make you feel that way, YNN. I never wanted you to feel like you weren’t enough. You’re everything to me. I’ve been an idiot, and I know I’ve hurt you, but please… don’t let this be the end for us. I can’t lose you. I just can’t… live without you. I can’t.”

The storm raged around them, but the silence between them felt deafening, thick with the weight of everything unsaid, everything unresolved. YN could feel the anger still bubbling inside her, but she also felt the pull of something deeper—the love she had for him, the love that she had thought was gone, but now seemed to flicker in her chest like a fragile flame.

She wanted to stay angry, to hold onto the hurt, but something inside her was giving way.

“Harry, I…” Her voice faltered, the words catching in her throat as her chest tightened painfully. “I don’t know if I can forgive you right now. I need time. I need space to figure this out.” She shook her head, unable to meet his eyes as the tears finally spilled over, mingling with the rain. “I don’t know if I can go back to who we were. You hurt me too much.”

He stepped forward again, his hand reaching for her, trembling with the force of his desperation. “Please, YN. I’ll do anything. I’ll give you all the space you need. I’ll be patient, I swear. I’ll wait as long as it takes. But don’t walk away from me. Please.”

She didn’t respond immediately. The storm had drowned out every thought, every hesitation in her mind, but there was still one thing she knew for certain: she couldn’t let him go. Not yet. She wasn’t ready. Not when her heart was still so tangled up in him, so unable to let go of the person he had once been to her.

“I need time,” she repeated softly, her voice barely audible against the pounding rain. “I need to think, Harry. Please, just… just go inside. I can’t—” She couldn’t finish the sentence, not without breaking apart completely.

Harry nodded, his face a picture of heartbreaking understanding. His heart was in pieces, but he was willing to wait, willing to do whatever it took to prove that he could make things right. Without another word, he turned toward the house, slowly, unwilling to leave her in the storm but knowing that he had to respect her need for space.

YN watched him go, her heart heavy in her chest, torn between love and hurt, between forgiveness and anger. The rain continued to pour, and as she stood there, feeling the cold seep into her bones, she wondered if they would ever find their way back to each other—or if this was the beginning of the end.

The night had felt like an eternity. Each minute stretched on, filled with haunting thoughts and the pounding rhythm of YNs heart. Her mind was tangled in knots, the anger still burning bright, but beneath it all, there was an undercurrent of something she couldn’t deny: the love she still had for Harry. It was the kind of love that had once felt so pure, so easy, but now felt fractured, jagged, like trying to hold onto a shattered glass piece that was bleeding into her heart.

She hadn’t been able to sleep. The past few days, the pain, the betrayal, the anger—it all swirled together in a mess that made her restless. Harry’s words from the night before—the desperate, raw apology—replayed over and over again in her mind, like a broken record. And yet, each time she thought of it, the hurt crept back in. She had tried to push it away, tried to convince herself that she could ignore it, but the reality was that she couldn’t. Not when the memories of their love, of their happy moments, still clung to her like the scent of his cologne.

But it wasn’t just the hurt she was feeling. There was something else, something deeper, something that felt too real to ignore. She couldn’t escape the way her heart still responded to Harry, no matter how hard she tried.

As the morning light began to filter through the windows, YN could no longer stay in the silence of her room. She had to see him. She had to confront everything that had happened and, maybe—just maybe—find a way to heal. But even as the desire to see him grew stronger, there was still that gnawing uncertainty. Could she really trust him again? Could she really forgive him for what had happened?

The house was quiet as she made her way down the stairs, the soft creak of the wooden steps echoing in the otherwise still air. The soft hum of the morning felt foreign against the heaviness that weighed on her shoulders, but she ignored it, pushing forward. When she stepped outside, the cold hit her like a rush, but it was nothing compared to the chill in her heart.

The lake was quiet, still as glass, the air thick with the faint scent of damp earth and fresh water. And there, sitting on the grass at the edge of the lake, was Harry. His posture was slumped, his shoulders drooped, as though the weight of the world was resting on him. The sight of him in this state, so broken and vulnerable, pulled at her heart in ways she couldn’t explain.

He looked so small, so lost.

For a moment, YN stood there, watching him. She wasn’t sure what to do, what to say. But as she watched him, she realized that she couldn’t stay away. Not anymore. She had to speak. She had to let him know how much he had hurt her, but also how much she still cared, despite everything.

Her footsteps were quiet on the soft earth as she made her way toward him. Harry didn’t look up immediately, but she could see the slight twitch of his head as if he felt her presence. His face was blank, his eyes staring out at the water, but there was something in the way he held himself that spoke volumes.

YN stopped just a few feet away, standing still as the silence stretched between them. For what felt like an eternity, neither of them spoke. The tension was thick, palpable, like a heavy fog.

Finally, she couldn’t stand it anymore. The silence, the uncertainty. She had to break it.

“I don’t even know where to start, Harry,” she said, her voice trembling just slightly as she crossed her arms over her chest, trying to protect herself from the rawness of the moment. “You hurt me. You really hurt me. And I don’t know if I can ever forget what you said to me. What you did to us.”

Harry flinched, as if each word she spoke cut through him. He finally lifted his head, his red-rimmed eyes meeting hers. There was guilt in those eyes, raw and undeniable. His voice came out barely above a whisper.

“I’m sorry, YNN. I’m so sorry. I can’t even begin to explain how much I regret everything. I was angry, and I was drunk, and I didn’t—” He cut himself off, his hands shaking as he clenched them into fists at his sides. “I never meant to hurt you. Not like that. You’re everything to me, YNN. You always have been.”

YN took a deep breath, her chest tight with the conflicting emotions. She wanted to stay angry, to protect herself from the pain he’d caused, but she couldn’t deny that his words, his remorse, were hitting something deep inside her. It wasn’t enough to erase the hurt, but it was a start. She looked at him, really looked at him, and saw how broken he was. He was a man who had made a mistake, but he was also a man who still cared for her.

“I don’t want to feel like this anymore,” she whispered, her voice breaking. “I don’t want to live in the hurt and the anger. I want to move past this, but I need to know that you’ll never do this again. I need to know that you’re willing to fight for us.”

Harry’s eyes welled up, the emotion overwhelming him. He reached out then, taking her hand gently, almost like he was afraid she might pull away. “I swear to you, YNN. I’ll fight for us. I’ll fight for you. I’ll do whatever it takes to make this right. I’ll spend every single day proving to you that you’re worth more than anything, more than the stupid mistakes I’ve made. You mean everything to me.”

YN’s breath caught in her throat. It was impossible to ignore the depth of his words, the rawness in his voice. But it wasn’t just the words that got to her; it was the sincerity in his eyes, the vulnerability that he rarely showed anyone, let alone her.

She stepped closer to him, her heart pounding as she tried to make sense of the whirlwind of emotions swirling inside her. She had been so angry, so broken, but looking at him now, she realized that she couldn’t just walk away.

“I want to believe you, Harry,” she whispered, her voice shaking. “I really do. But I need time. I need time to heal, to trust you again.”

Harry’s face softened, relief flooding through him. “I understand. Take all the time you need. I’ll be here, every step of the way. I’ll prove to you that I’m worth it. That we’re worth it.”

And in that moment, everything felt a little bit clearer. The storm inside her had not fully subsided, but the clouds were beginning to part, and the sun was starting to peek through. She stepped closer, closing the distance between them, and in one slow, careful motion, she placed her hand on his chest. The steady beat of his heart under her palm was a reminder of how much he still cared.

“I’m willing to try,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper. “I’m willing to try if you promise me that you’ll never let me go again.”

Harry’s eyes shone with tears, and he pulled her into his arms, his hands cupping her face gently as he kissed her forehead, his lips brushing softly over her skin. “I promise you, YNN. I’ll never let you go. You’re my everything. I love you.”

YN closed her eyes, letting his words wash over her. She hadn’t been sure if she could forgive him, if she could ever move past the hurt. But standing here in his arms, feeling his heart beat against hers, she realized that love wasn’t always easy. It wasn’t always simple. But it was worth fighting for.

“I love you too,” she whispered back, her voice trembling with emotion.

And as they stood there, wrapped in each other’s arms, the world around them felt a little less heavy, a little less uncertain. The future was still unclear, but for the first time in a long time, they both had hope.

They’ll be alright.

[sweetlady555]

Unlocking the hidden power of Mars 12H:

Hi everyone! I apologize for not having been uploading as much but I’m back and writing about Mars 12H because it's so powerful and I rarely EVER see anyone talking about it. As I’ve decided to step fully into my power starting November 2024, I’ve recently realized something powerful about my energy that completely changed my perspective, I will be using Kim Kardashian as my example as she is a Mars 12H native :$

What Is Mars in the 12H? 🤔

Mars represents drive, action and motivation. The 12H is the house of the subconscious, hidden things, spirituality, behind the scenes, hidden strengths, the spiritual realm. When these two energies combine, they create an energy that works below the surface often in ways we aren't fully conscious of. 👁️

One thing you should know is Mars 12H natives makes moves in silence they don't need outside noise or your projections! You'll see how it's done just watch, you don't know need to know how, why or when they're going to do it, but just know they've been multiple steps ahead of you. Its like this divine calling thats always in your ear telling you which move shall be next and its such a strong force that its like if you don’t take action itll make you feel so……… wrong its like a itch. Usually Mars 12H natives do take the action and it leads to blessings I like to call them. Mars 12H natives do not feel the need to force anything, when the thought and feeling comes you do that shit! Mars 12H natives are always mysteriously led to exactly where they need to be.. this is likely why they get their rep for being so mysterious & secretive! Its imporant as a Mars 12H native to listen to your gut and trust that everything will work out as planned, and this doesn’t go for just Mars 12H natives it goes for everyone!

Let's use Kim Kardashian as a famous example on how Mars 12H manifests for the natives, as a Mars in 12H native I feel like I can relate to her ambition and I can understand her doings.

Kim Kardashain always knew she was going to be a star, if you have seen her videos of her younger self she states, "and you're all going to remember me as this beautiful little girl" For both Kim and people with Mars 12th house, the confidence and determination to become a star or successful often comes from a deep subconscious belief in their destiny. Even if they don't know the "how" or the "when," they just FEEL compelled to take action towards their dreams, sometimes in ways that seem hidden or almost effortless to others. In Kim's case, she didn't just fall into success, she actively pursued it through her work, image crafting, and seizing opportunities. Even before she became widely known, she had an innate sense of how to position herself and build her brand. This is the Mars 12H signature, an internal drive that doesn't always need external validation or explanations to succeed. Many people accuse Kim of "destiny swapping" with Paris Hilton but let's be so fo real right now.. Destiny swapping doesn't exist, and I feel like people just can't believe Kim rose above Paris Hilton which seemed so effortlessly, but not enough people credit her for her hard work and perseverance. People have accused her for being a reptellian too 😭 ? because I guess its that hard to understand hard work, dedication and logic actually does pay off! Kim has a vision and she's still actively working hard for her vision behind the scenes, and if its one thing we all know its that Kim will chase her bag regardless!

My experience with Mars in the 12H :

Growing up, I always knew I was going to be something special, I knew I was gonna be influential (I have 10H placements so this might manifest differently) Last year, I had rose to fame very quickly online through my image and the amount of people who were confused af how I did it was flattering not gonna lie! I would hear people tell me things like “did you sell your soul?” or “whats the method?” or “you only got it because you had this and this” . I was always in my own bubble online posting what I feel destined to do no matter what my ego said. I thought with my soul a lot of times even if it was shocking, so honestly I could see how people would accuse me of “selling my soul” or having a certain method to my influential social media fame. There is a lot of pain & passion behind my doings and I logically plan everything out so it kind of flatters me honestly! To me this just shows how Mars 12H natives are skilled in making something out of themselves coming from being a underdog to becoming someone highly admired.

The Energy Of A 12H Mars Native :

Mars in the 12H natives can have this strong powerful magnetic effect on others without them even realizing it but others will feel this on a subconcious level. They truly have a lot of appeal! Its almost like this hidden power or secret magentism that draws people in which could attract a lot of admirers, monitoring spirits, actual spirits even! 😭 The truth is though, Mars 12H natives do really have this strong inner power within them, they tend to be very confident in themselves and this energy reflects on the outside even through the screen. They have this aura around them that can’t be ignored. Mars 12H natives will often be seen as untouchable or enigmatic, just like Kim she knew how to use this energy to use this subtle allure to captivate her audience.

People with Mars 12H have this sexual energy that is more felt, not seen! This can make their presence intoxicating as others may sense their sexual energy without knowing where it’s coming from. Its almost hypnotic! Its a deeply rooted emotional and spiritual sexual energy often rooted in the subconcious. With Kim, she knew how to use this energy in her brand being percieved as seductive, powerful and confident, but it wasnt just about her body — it was about the way she carried herself and commanded attention without saying much.

Despite being more subtle, Mars in the 12H gives the individual an almost unconcious control over their sexual energy. Theres an innate understanding of how to play on emotions and create attraction often with very little effort. This creates an energy that is simultaneously passive and powerful and you can’t deny or ignore it either. Almost like being in the background but still being the force everyone notices.

There is a lot of fantasy and imagination that takes place with Mars 12H natives and how theyre percieved, natives with this placement tend to make others fantasize about them not just by how they look but how they make people feel! Their energy creates a sense of longing, almost like a dream or a fantasy that others want to live in. Kim Kardashian has been able to tap into this fantasy energy by cultivating an image of perfect beauty and luxury, which keeps her in a fantasy world that fans want to be apart of. This fantasy element is key to her sexual appeal, as it makes her seem unreachable and unattainable.

Mars 12H natives, if they aren’t aware of their power makes them a target for insecure people and spirits in the physical and spiritual realm. People will often notice this energy before you even do and project the most they can and throw as much dirt as they can on you because they’re afraid of your power! Its highly advised you take the precautions and make sure you are being careful in who you’re telling your business to, what things you might be opening in the physical and spiritual realm, who you let into your space, who you’re doing business with all of it! Dont let them take advantage of you!

I also had read that Mars 12H often repress their emotions or their anger and although it is that in some cases, Mars 12H natives just tend to strategically move instead of acting out on anger or resentment in the moment to avoid unnecessary conflict and to stay in power and their own peace. Its a silent strength many Mars 12H natives have where you don’t have to scream or shout to prove yourself, you can strategically wait for the right moment, then act with precision. This ability to stay focused and composed on long term goals is what makes Mars 12H natives have this quiet power behind them. People might not realize that this anger comes from a calculated, startegic place, its not random but it could be percieved as out of nowhere. The 12H is often linked to subconcious energies, hidden feelings and things that are not visible to others, so when Mars 12H natives express their anger it can come off as intense, mysterious or even uncontrollable to those around you. People may not fully understand why you do the things you do or whats going on beneath the surface so this often leads to people labeling your anger more extreme.

The Spirtual Realm

Mars in the 12H natives are often deeply connected to the spiritual realm, but they experience it in a unique way. This placement can give them a natural sensitivity to invisible forces or energies like I mentioned earlier a divine force! Whether that may be intuition, sprits or subconcious currents that influence their actions. Mars in the 12H is often described as “Behind the scenes” or operating in the background, which makes these individuals especially attuned to the unseen world—the spiritual, emotional and psychological realm.

Mars, the planet of action, aggression and energy, in the 12h amplifies the natives ability to tap into intuitive and spiritual currents. This placement suggests that instead of being overly action-oriented in a physical way, Mars energy often works in more subtle and intuitive forms. For these individuals, the battle often happens internally-in the subconscious, in dreams, or in their connection to the spirit world.

Mars in the 12th house people often experience a sense of being guided by invisible forces, and they can be highly receptive to messages or signs from the spirit realm. This doesn't always mean they consciously hear or see spirits, but rather that they might feel guided by an internal voice or experience moments of divine timing that feel too precise to be mere coincidence. They may also experience heightened sensitivity to energy, such as a feeling of being watched, sudden shifts in mood or vivid dreams. Its not a common occurrence to hear ringing in your ears when you’re picking and feeling up on certain energies with these natives!

Since Mars 12H is a powerful subtle energy this makes spirits from the spiritual realm more attracted to them, Mars 12H natives are very assertive and felt by these spirits hence why certain spirits like to latch onto them. Its not common either to see spirits, see things move suddenly and even a spirit taking control over your body when you’re asleep. It sounds scary but don’t let this make you afraid, I once fell into this when I was around 8 or 9 when I was sleeping and a spirit had woken me up in the middle of the night and made me literally slam my face into my headboard that made the principal think I was getting hurt at home, i was always targeted by this spirit. I was the only one who could speak to it and make them do certain things like move toys and such. I didnt realize at the time I was connecting with aggresive spirits 😅 and not God. Its highly important for Mars 12H natives to strongly protect themselves when they are asleep because when you are asleep the veil between the spiritual realm and physical realm is very thin!

Mars 12H natives embody this spirtual warrior archetype, they can feel a calling to fight or stand up for spiritual causes or to protect others, but they do this in a way that is not outwardly visible to others. Mars 12H natives might actively avoid conflict when it comes to spiritual warfare or protecting their energy and their peace. They may also engage in energy work, spiritual practices, or rituals in private to protect themselves from unwanted spiritual influence. This is often done subtly or privately, as they don't always like to broadcast their spiritual strength. Their Mars energy in the 12th house can make them exceptionally good at clearing negative energy, transmuting it, and defending themselves from energetic or spiritual attacks, but they may prefer to do so behind the scenes, where others don't see it.

Mars in the 12th house natives may also experience periods of isolation or retreat, where they feel the need to withdraw from the physical world to connect with the unseen world. These moments of solitude allow them to recharge spiritually, process subconscious material, and connect with higher realms of consciousness. During these times, they may feel a deep connection with their higher self or with the spiritual beings guiding them.

When it comes to spiritual practices, these individuals are likely to have a natural talent for healing or working with energy, whether it's through prayer, meditation, crystals, or other metaphysical practices. Mars in the 12th house helps them channel life force energy in a quiet, powerful way, almost like a spiritual warrior operating in the background, quietly shifting energy around them.

Its important to watch out as a Mars 12H native what you are putting your energy into as these things will manifest almost immediately. When you decide to shift your attention to other IMPORTANT things you will often notice your energy was literally the foundation for whatever negative thing that was happening. So be Aware! You know how powerful your energy is.

This was a long post but as a Mars 12H native, I rarely see any accurate or in depth posts of Mars 12H individuals, I had to really dig into my experiences to understand this was Mars 12H influence all along.. In my opinion, Mars 12H natives deserve so much more respect for what they do because a lot of it goes unseen and for multiple reasons lol. I havent wrote in a while but I was getting a huge urge calling to post about this. If any mars 12h individuals relate to any of these experiences please let me know because I’d love to hear from you! and please be careful 💟 may god protect your divine energy, space and you ☮️

[jeonsblackgf-writes]

Brat Tamer | JJ Maybank

summary: You underestimate JJ when it comes to sex

pairing: JJ Maybank x black!readee

word count: 7,942

warnings: unprotected sex, oral sex (m&f), face slapping, rough sex

AN: I’m high yall so when I started writing i literally could not stop .. and now here we are! REQUESTS ARE OPEN

________________

The summer heat was stifling, heavy enough to make tempers flare. But you didn’t sweat—ever. Not physically, not metaphorically. It didn’t matter if it was the middle of July in the Outer Banks or someone testing your patience—you stayed cool.

Today was no exception. You sat at your usual table on The Wreck’s patio, long legs crossed and nails tapping against your lemonade glass. Freshly manicured, your nails caught the sunlight in a way that was impossible to ignore. The poor waiter had already tried twice to get your drink order right, but still, the lemonade didn’t taste like what you asked for.

“Listen, baby,” you said, your voice syrupy-sweet but laced with edge. “How hard is it to add strawberries? I know y’all got ‘em. I can see them behind the counter.”

The boy stammered something about checking again, and you waved him off, exhaling in annoyance. “Can’t find good help no more,” you muttered, leaning back in your chair.

Across the patio, JJ Maybank lounged in his seat, sunglasses sliding down his nose as he tilted his head to watch you. He wasn’t subtle. That amused grin tugging at his lips wasn’t, either.

“She’s somethin’ else,” JJ said, low enough for only Pope to hear.

You caught him staring, though. You always caught them staring. But JJ didn’t look away like most people did when you locked eyes with them. No, he leaned into it, smirking like he knew something about you that you didn’t.

You let it slide for now, but when the waiter returned with your drink, still wrong, your patience hit zero. “You know what?” you said, voice sharp as the click of your heels as you stood. “Forget it. I’ll make it myself.”

You stalked toward the bar, every step calculated, hips swaying just enough to make sure everyone knew you were somebody. On your way, though, you couldn’t resist stopping at JJ’s table, your shadow falling across him.

“You got somethin’ you wanna say, or are you just gon’ keep gawkin’ like a lost puppy?” Your words were pointed, but your tone was teasing, a challenge wrapped in silk.

JJ slid his sunglasses off, eyes a piercing blue that raked over you slowly, boldly. “Maybe I’m just waitin’ for you to bite first.”

That made you pause. You leaned closer, close enough to catch the faint scent of his cologne and whatever mischief was brewing in those eyes of his. “Boy, you couldn’t handle it if I did.”

“Try me,” he said, voice dropping just enough to make your stomach tighten.

You studied him for a beat longer than you meant to, then tilted your head, a slow smirk spreading across your lips. “Cute,” you said, straightening and taking a step back. “But I don’t do charity cases.”

JJ chuckled, low and gravelly, as you walked away. “Keep tellin’ yourself that, princess. We’ll see how long that lasts.”

You didn’t stop, but you tossed a look over your shoulder, the curve of your smile enough to keep him hooked. “Don’t hold your breath, Maybank.”

But as you made your way behind the bar, the heat wasn’t just from the summer sun anymore.

The sun was setting now, casting the Outer Banks in golden light, but JJ Maybank wasn’t about to let you go that easily. Something about the way you dismissed him—like he wasn’t worth your time—lit a fire in him.

You weren’t his usual type. You were high maintenance, all diamonds and designer sandals. The kind of girl who expected the world handed to her on a platter. But damn, if you weren’t intriguing. Sharp tongue, sharp wit, and sharp enough to cut through his charm like a knife.

He stood up from his table, sliding his hands into his pockets as he watched you behind the bar, instructing the staff like you were running the place. Maybe you were. He wouldn’t put it past you.

When you turned, you spotted him leaning against the bar, watching. You rolled your eyes. “What now, Maybank?”

“Didn’t think you’d notice,” he said, grinning as he stepped closer. “Figured you were too busy bossin’ everyone around.”

“Someone’s gotta do it,” you shot back, resting your forearms on the counter. You tilted your head, meeting his gaze without a shred of hesitation. “Now, you followin’ me, or you just lost?”

JJ leaned in, closing the distance between you until your faces were inches apart. His voice dropped low, just for you. “Maybe I’m both.”

You blinked, your composure slipping for half a second before you masked it with a scoff. “Cute. But if you’re lookin’ for a handout, you’re barkin’ up the wrong tree.”

He smirked, catching the faint crack in your facade. “Who said anything about a handout? Maybe I just like a challenge.”

“You? A challenge?” You laughed, leaning back, but your pulse betrayed you. He was too close, his presence electric, and you hated that it was working. “Boy, please.”

JJ’s eyes traveled down to your lips before snapping back to your eyes. “Keep tellin’ yourself that, princess. But you’re the one still talkin’ to me.”

You opened your mouth to fire back, but nothing came out. He had you, just for a second, and he knew it. That smirk widened, lazy and confident.

Before you could regain the upper hand, JJ stepped back, breaking the tension just enough to leave you wanting more. “Enjoy your drink,” he said, turning on his heel and sauntering away, his swagger as cocky as ever.

You stayed where you were, blinking, wondering how the hell you let him get the last word. But as you watched him disappear into the crowd, you felt it—that little spark of curiosity burning hotter than you wanted to admit.

JJ Maybank had your attention, and that was dangerous. For both of you.

The night rolled in, and the soft glow of fairy lights strung around The Wreck gave the place a dreamy vibe. You stayed longer than you planned, sitting at your table and letting the warm breeze dance over your skin. If you were honest with yourself, you were waiting.

Waiting to see if JJ Maybank had the audacity to come back.

You didn’t have to wait long.

“Thought you might still be here,” his voice drawled from behind you.

You glanced over your shoulder, arching a brow. He stood there with his hands in his pockets, his T-shirt clinging to him in all the right ways, his hair tousled like he’d just rolled out of trouble.

“And what if I am?” you asked, turning back to your drink and swirling the straw lazily.

JJ took it as an invitation, sliding into the seat across from you like he owned it. “Figured you’d want some company. Can’t be easy keepin’ up that mean girl act all by yourself.”

You smirked, shaking your head. “Oh, trust, I’m not actin’.”

“That so?” He leaned forward, resting his forearms on the table, his eyes locking onto yours with an intensity that made your breath hitch. “Could’ve fooled me.”

The way he looked at you wasn’t casual. It was deliberate, like he was daring you to react. And as much as you hated to admit it, you liked it.

“You must be real bored,” you said, leaning back and crossing your legs. “Or just desperate. I can’t decide which one’s worse.”

JJ chuckled, low and rough. “Maybe I’m just curious.”

“‘Bout what?”

“‘Bout you,” he said simply. “You act like you got it all figured out, but I think you like pushin’ people away just to see who’s stupid enough to stick around.”

The words hit harder than you expected, but you didn’t let it show. Instead, you leaned in, lowering your voice. “And you think you’re stupid enough?”

He smirked, his eyes dropping to your lips for a split second before meeting your gaze again. “I think I can handle you.”

“Boy I’ll break you,” you scoffed, laughing softly. “You couldn’t handle half of me.”

“I dunno,” he said, his voice dropping, rougher now. “You seem like the kind of girl who likes seein’ people try.”

You stared at him, your stomach flipping in a way you hadn’t felt in a long time. He wasn’t wrong. You liked the game, liked the power it gave you. But this wasn’t just any guy trying to impress you. JJ was playing your game and flipping the rules, making you wonder if you could keep up.

Before you could respond, he reached across the table, brushing his fingers against the back of your hand. It wasn’t much, just a light touch, but it sent a jolt through you.

“You feel that?” he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

You didn’t pull your hand away. You didn’t say anything. But the heat between you was undeniable, sparking in the space neither of you dared to cross just yet.

“Good,” JJ said after a beat, leaning back with a satisfied grin. “Means I’m gettin’ somewhere.”

You rolled your eyes, snatching your hand away and shaking your head. “Keep dreamin’, Maybank.”

But you didn’t leave. Neither did he. And somewhere in the back of your mind, you knew this wasn’t over.

The tension hung heavy between you and JJ, crackling like a live wire. You told yourself you were just bored, letting him hang around for entertainment. But deep down, you knew better.

He leaned back in his chair, arms crossed, his smirk firmly in place as if he knew exactly what he was doing to you. And maybe he did.

“So, what’s your deal, princess?” JJ asked, breaking the silence.

“My deal?” You arched a brow, stirring your drink as if you weren’t fazed. “What’s yours? What’s a Pogue like you doing sniffin’ around Figure Eight?”

He grinned, the kind of grin that said he didn’t care what you thought of him. “Maybe I just like a challenge.”

“Or maybe you don’t know when you’re out of your depth,” you shot back, tilting your head.

JJ chuckled, leaning forward again. “See, that’s where you’re wrong. I think you like that about me. You’re used to all those Kook boys doing whatever you say. Bet you don’t know what to do with someone who doesn’t play by your rules.”

You stared at him, your lips pressing into a line. He wasn’t wrong, but you’d never admit that. Instead, you let a slow, teasing smile curve your lips. “And you think you’re that someone?”

He held your gaze, his blue eyes piercing. “I know I am.”

The confidence in his voice made your stomach flip. You leaned closer, your faces inches apart now, your voice dropping to a whisper. “Boy, I could ruin you without even trying.”

“Do it,” he said, the challenge thick in his tone. “I dare you.”

The air between you felt suffocating, your heart pounding so loud you swore he could hear it. His eyes flicked down to your lips, and for a split second, you wondered what it would feel like. You were a different breed, JJ would have his dick tucked, crying back to his friends if you got a hold of him

You could feel the heat between you intensify, like everything around you faded out, leaving just the two of you in this charged moment. His gaze flicked down to your lips again, and you caught your breath, heart pounding as the words left your lips before you could stop them.

“Don’t tempt me, Maybank,” you murmured, the edge of your voice betraying the control you were trying to hold onto.

JJ’s grin didn’t falter. If anything, it only deepened. “Then maybe you need to be reminded of how good it feels when someone calls your bluff. Maybe those kook boys don’t fuck you good enough, but me? I’ll fuck you just right.”

Your hand twitched, the urge to push him away—or pull him closer—fighting for dominance. But you stayed still, your breath shallow as you stared at him, a slow burn crawling beneath your skin. The space between you seemed to close with each passing second, and you fought the impulse to give in. To give him what he wanted.

He leaned forward, so close now that his breath was warm against your cheek. “I know you feel it, too. That thing between us. Don’t act like you don’t.”

You took a slow breath, the sharpness in your tone returning as you shoved the fire creeping up in your chest down. “You’re right,” you said, voice quieter now. “I feel it. But don’t get it twisted, Maybank. This little game of yours? It’s gonna cost you.”

JJ’s eyes sparkled with a mix of amusement and something darker. He leaned in just a little more, his lips brushing your ear as he whispered, “I’m counting on it, princess.”

You froze. The tension was unbearable now, and for the first time, you felt that little bit of control slipping. But you weren’t about to let him see that. Not yet.

You pulled back quickly, putting a few inches of space between you, eyes narrowing as you gave him a look that said you wouldn’t back down. “You talk a big game, but can you actually keep up?”

JJ’s smirk never wavered, the cocky confidence radiating from him. “We’ll find out, won’t we?” He stood up, slowly, never taking his eyes off you. “I’ll see you around, princess.”

As he walked away, you watched him, heart pounding in your chest, a mix of frustration and desire swirling inside you. The game was only just beginning, and you weren’t sure who would end up winning. But one thing was clear—he wasn’t going anywhere, and neither were you.

The days that followed were a blur of half-hearted attempts to focus on anything else. You were used to getting what you wanted, on your terms. But ever since JJ Maybank had come into your life, it was like everything shifted just a little. He was everywhere. The way he looked at you, the way he challenged you—it made your head spin.

You weren’t used to this.

It was a warm afternoon when you found yourself back at The Wreck, seated at your usual spot with a drink in hand, waiting for your friends. You told yourself you were just there for a good time, not to see if JJ would show up again. But as the minutes ticked by, you found your eyes wandering to the front door with the hope that he’d walk through it.

And, of course, he did.

JJ strolled in with that same lazy swagger, looking like he’d just stepped out of a beachside magazine shoot. He scanned the room, and for a second, his eyes locked onto yours. You narrowed your eyes at him, giving him the cold shoulder, trying to maintain some semblance of control.

But you couldn’t ignore the way his lips twitched when he saw you.

Without breaking eye contact, he made his way over to your table, sliding into the seat across from you without asking. His grin was cocky as ever. “Didn’t expect to see you here.”

You raised an eyebrow, leaning back in your chair. “And what? You think I’m just gonna follow you around now?”

“I think you can’t stay away,” he said smoothly, his voice dropping a little lower. “I think you like the game. And you’re not ready to let me win yet.”

You huffed, trying to mask the little flutter in your chest. “Keep dreamin’, Maybank.”

But he didn’t back off. Instead, his gaze slid over you, slowly, deliberately, making your pulse quicken. He was testing you, and you weren’t about to give him the satisfaction of knowing how much he affected you.

“I’m not dreamin’, princess,” he said softly, his voice almost too low for anyone else to hear. “I’m just enjoyin’ the view.”

The words hit you like a punch to the gut. You felt your cheeks flush, but you kept your face neutral, refusing to give him any indication that his words had landed. Instead, you leaned forward, your lips curving into a playful smirk.

“Is that so? You sure you’re not just tryin’ to get under my skin?”

JJ’s smirk widened, and for the briefest moment, you saw something more in his eyes—a flicker of something deeper. But it was gone before you could name it. He leaned in, mirroring your posture, his face only inches from yours.

“I think it’s working,” he said, voice thick with something dangerous. “Don’t try to pretend you don’t feel it.”

Your breath hitched, but you refused to back down. “I don’t know what you’re talkin’ about.”

JJ’s gaze flicked to your lips before meeting your eyes again. “You don’t have to admit it, princess. But I know you’re just as interested as I am.”

You stood quickly, your chair scraping back as you leaned over the table, the distance between you vanishing in an instant. “You don’t know a damn thing about me, Maybank.”

His smile didn’t falter. He leaned forward just enough to close the gap, his lips barely brushing against your ear as he spoke. “Maybe I’m just waitin’ for you to show me, then.”

The electric tension that shot through your body in that moment was undeniable. Your heart raced, pulse throbbing in your ears. You hated how much you wanted him—how much you wanted to break and let him win.

But you didn’t.

Instead, you pulled away, your composure returning as you straightened up. “Nice try, but I don’t do charity cases.”

JJ laughed low and easy, sitting back in his chair, his eyes never leaving you. “We’ll see about that, princess.”

You walked away, but this time, you didn’t feel the relief you usually did. You knew something had shifted, and you couldn’t deny the pull toward him any longer.

And, somehow, you didn’t want to.

It was getting harder to ignore the pull, the way JJ seemed to be everywhere you went, always so damn close. The chemistry was undeniable, and every interaction felt like an unspoken dare. But the game was far from over. You weren’t about to let him think he had you figured out just yet.

But you also couldn’t help the way your body responded when he was near. Every time he got close, you could feel it—this electric charge between you that made it hard to breathe. You didn’t know whether to run or lean in, but you sure as hell weren’t going to make it easy for him.

It was late one evening when you finally cracked.

The Wreck was quieter than usual, the late-night crowd thinned out, leaving the place with a calm, almost intimate atmosphere. You were sitting at the bar, swirling your drink in your hands, letting your thoughts drift. That’s when you felt the familiar presence.

You didn’t need to turn around to know it was JJ. You could feel him, his eyes on you, drawing you in even from across the room.

“Couldn’t stay away?” he asked, his voice smooth, almost too confident.

You looked up at him, keeping your expression neutral. “What do you want, Maybank?”

He slid onto the stool next to you, close enough that you could feel the heat from his body radiating into yours. “I told you, I’m just curious. Still don’t think you can handle it?” His tone was teasing, but there was something else lurking beneath it—something darker.

You narrowed your eyes at him, the temptation to let your guard down almost overwhelming. “I’m sure you don’t know the meaning of the word ‘handle,’” you shot back, though your words were laced with more heat than you cared to admit.

“Think I don’t?” He leaned in closer, his voice lowering, sending a shiver through you. “I can handle you. I think that’s exactly why you keep tryin’ to push me away.”

You looked at him, eyes locking. The intensity between you was suffocating, the kind of tension that had been building between you for days now. There was no going back.

Without thinking, you slid off your stool, standing right in front of him, so close you could feel the heat from his body envelop you. “Don’t try to act like you know me, JJ,” you said, voice steady despite the wild pounding of your heart. “You couldn’t handle a girl like me.”

His eyes darkened, lips parting slightly as he leaned in, not giving you any space to escape. “I think I could.” His voice was a growl, a soft challenge hanging in the air between you.

Your breath caught in your throat, and for a moment, you almost couldn’t breathe. The way he was looking at you, the way his body was just inches from yours—it was too much, and yet, you wanted more.

He reached for your wrist, gently pulling you closer. You could feel the calloused warmth of his hand against your skin, a contrast to the softness of your own. “I’m not some Kook who’s gonna back down,” he whispered, his lips brushing your ear as he spoke. “I’ll push you until you can’t stand it. Until you beg for mercy.” He licked your ear.

You swallowed, your chest rising and falling with each breath, your heart a wild mess in your chest. You wanted to fight him, wanted to say something, anything, to push him away. But it was hard to find the words when everything in you screamed to just give in.

Instead, you pushed him back, just slightly, your voice barely a whisper. “You better be ready for the consequences.”

JJ’s lips curled into that familiar smirk, the one that said he was already three steps ahead. “I’m counting on it.”

Without another word, he let you go, standing up slowly and walking toward the door, leaving you breathless in his wake.

You stood there for a long moment, struggling to collect yourself. But something inside you knew you weren’t done with him. Neither of you were. The line had been crossed.

And you both knew there was no going back.

It had been weeks since that night, and the tension between you and JJ hadn’t let up. If anything, it had only grown. There were still moments when you’d catch him looking at you with that cocky grin, like he knew something you didn’t, and then there were moments when he’d be all too serious, like he was trying to figure you out.

But tonight? Tonight was different.

Your friends had dragged you out to a house party on the outskirts of the Outer Banks. The house was packed with Kooks and Pogues, loud music blaring from the speakers, people laughing and dancing like the world didn’t exist beyond this moment. You told yourself you were just here for the fun, to forget about everything else for a while. But you couldn’t stop thinking about him.

JJ Maybank was the last person you wanted to see tonight. And the first person you were hoping would show up.

You had been making your way through the crowd when you saw him—standing in the corner, drink in hand, with that same lazy confidence he wore like armor. His hair was slightly damp from the heat of the room, his shirt clinging to his chest, and that smirk? It was there, as if he knew exactly what kind of effect he had on you.

You paused, watching him for a beat. It was almost like he was waiting for you to come to him.

You didn’t give him the satisfaction. Not yet.

Instead, you found your friends and tried to lose yourself in the chaos, but it didn’t take long before JJ was on your radar again. You could feel his eyes on you, and every time you turned around, he was closer, moving through the crowd like he owned the place.

Finally, you couldn’t take it anymore. You had been avoiding him long enough.

“Hey, princess,” JJ’s voice was low and smooth, right behind you, sending a shiver down your spine.

You turned, almost too quickly, your eyes locking with his. “What do you want, Maybank?” You tried to keep your voice steady, but the way his gaze slid over you made your chest tighten.

“I was gonna ask you the same thing,” he said, his tone teasing, but there was something else in it—something deeper. “But I think I already know the answer.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Yeah? What’s that?”

JJ grinned, stepping closer, his body just a few inches away from yours now. The air between you was thick with tension, like a magnet pulling you toward him whether you liked it or not. “You’re thinking about me.” His eyes dropped to your lips, just for a second, before meeting your gaze again. “Aren’t you?”

Your heart skipped a beat, and you hated that it was so obvious. But you weren’t going to let him win so easily. “Not as much as you think, Maybank,” you said, though your voice was a little less convincing than you intended.

JJ chuckled, a sound that made your stomach tighten. “You keep lying to yourself, princess. But you can’t lie to me.”

You tried to step back, but JJ’s hand shot out, gripping your wrist gently. “You don’t have to fight it anymore. I know you want this.”

The feel of his hand on your skin was like fire, and the tension that had been building for weeks came crashing down in an instant. You stood there, staring at him, your pulse racing.

“I don’t have to fight anything, Maybank,” you whispered, leaning in just enough so your lips were barely brushing his. “But don’t think you’ve won yet.”

JJ’s smirk grew, and for a second, it was almost too much to handle. He leaned in, lips grazing your ear as he whispered, “Oh, princess. We both know I’ve already won. You just don’t wanna admit it.”

You should’ve pushed him away. You should’ve said something—anything—to end this before it went too far. But you didn’t. Instead, you found yourself leaning into him, your body betraying you once again.

“Let’s get out of here,” he said, his voice low and commanding. “I think we both need a little privacy.”

The offer was tempting, too tempting. You knew the consequences, knew where this could go. But at that moment, you didn’t care. You weren’t ready to stop, not yet.

Without saying another word, you let him lead you through the crowd and upstairs, your hands brushing against each other, sending a jolt of electricity through your body.

JJ had this way of making everything else disappear, and the only thing that mattered was the feeling of his hand in yours, the pull between you two undeniable.

As you stepped inside a random room, the cool night air from an open window hit you, but you didn’t feel cold—not with him so close.

He turned to you, his hand sliding to your waist, pulling you closer. His eyes locked with yours, the playful smirk replaced by something more intense, more real. “You’re not gonna regret this,” he murmured.

Your heart was hammering in your chest, and every inch of you screamed to step back. But all you could do was nod, your voice barely a whisper. “I already am.”

JJ’s lips curled into a grin, and without another word, he kissed you.

The kiss was all fire—fierce, hungry, and urgent. You could feel everything in that moment: the heat of his body against yours, the way his hands roamed, pulling you even closer. Your mind screamed at you to stop, but your body didn’t care.

“JJ..” you whispered, as his hand urgently went all over your body, tilting you head back as he started to place wet, open mouth kisses on your neck.

“I know baby…I know.” He whispered, as he started to take your clothes off one by one.

Wanting to have control, you pushed him onto the bed, a grunt escaping his lips as he watched you run your manicured hands along his thighs, that siren look in your eyes, making him wait to cum in that moment. Without another word, you bit onto your lip, as you watched yourself zip his pants down, him helping you get him out of his jeans, leaving him only in his drawers.

“Remember when I said you couldn’t handle me?” You asked him, seductively. JJ gave you a small chuckle and nodded his head. You hummed, looking at him as you stuck your tongue out, running it along the outside of his plaid boxers, a moan falling from his lips as his back fell onto the bed. You licked again, this time slower, and harder.

“Jesus..do something.” he groaned, looking at you again as you kept licking the base of his dick in a teasing manner. The music from the party was still going loud so if anywhere were to hear you, they would be listening to damn hard.

“What do you want me to do baby? Talk to me.” You spoke, pulling his dick out from the pee hole. It was red, very red, and pre-cum was leaking from the tip so you did what any girl would do and licked the pre cum from his dick before taking his entire tip into your mouth, making sure that your mouth was wet, before abruptly stopping, JJ’s eyes popping open, almost scowling at you.

“What happened to you putting me in my place? Guess you just like every other kook den huh white boy.” You teased, giving his tip another soft lick.

Your words must’ve ignited something inside him, because he immediately reached forward and gripped your neck, catching you off guard. It wasn’t enough to kill you but enough to stop a little air flow. He leaned close, until your lips were barely touching.

“I’ve tried to play by your stupid ass rules. You’re gonna see why those kook idiots could never handle a girl like you like I can.”

You were suddenly thrown on the bed, JJ growling in the process. He immediately started to discard your clothes, not wasting any more time and not giving you a second to say a thing. He looked at your underwear and smirked.

“Matching set huh? How’d you know my favorite color pretty girl?” He asked, leaning down to rub his hands along your neck, wrapping both his hands around it before running them along your chest slowly, feeling it ride up and down quickly as he continued to move down to your breasts. He smiled at you before opening your legs and getting in between them properly. He continued to rub, going along your sides and your stomach, truly admiring your soft brown skin, before stopping right where he wanted to. The party on the other side was long forgotten.

“That’s a coincidence. You ain’t nobody special boo.” You retorted, despite the vulnerable position. You mouth would never let up, and he knew that.

JJ smiled, almost as if he were taking you for a joke, as he started to pull your underwear off. “Okay baby.”

With your panties gone, he finally got a chance to get a good look at what he had been thinking about so much. It was like watching a kid get his favorite toy. Your pretty legs were wide and welcoming, your pussy leaking, almost as if it were fucking fake.

He was in awe, he had never seen anything so pretty. Not only were you fucking soaking, you had a fat fucking pussy, a fucking perfect, and he would’ve came in his pants right then and there if he didn’t wanna eat you so bad.

He took one long sniff and moaned loud, almost catching you off guard. Nobody had ever done that.

“You smell so fucking good mama , can’t wait to eat you til you cry…” He whispered, placing open mouth kisses on your plump thighs, holding a tight grip on them. He licked the space between your right thigh and your pussy, causing you to gasp and bite your lip “You talked so much shit I swear to god I’m gonna make you regret agreeing to let me have you.”

Part of you was scared of that statement, not knowing what he truly meant, but you knew you were about to find out.

“Such a pretty pussy..” He whispered against your lips, slurping and sucking on your clit until he pulled it into his mouth and let it go. You let out a loud whine as your back arched against the bed, trying to close your legs from the immense pleasure but JJ growled and snapped your legs firmly back in place, watching your facial expression as he sucked your clit harder, shaking his head into your sopping wet folds.

“What were you saying? About me not being able to handle you?” He asked against your lips. Before you could answer, he placed his lips back on your clit, sucking harder and harder until you were pushing his head off you, not like he’ll let you. As his sucking continued, he added two fingers into your pussy, slowly fingering you as he watched you unfold. His mission was to make you come at least two times. That way, you never stop wanting more.

JJ flattened his tongue on your clit, and set rubbing circles, using his tongue, enjoying the feeling of your clit throbbing against him. You moaned, almost too loudly, pushing his head into your waxed pussy.

“Fuck yourself on daddy’s tongue. Give me that nut baby.” He rasped, allowing you to move your hips against his mouth, letting you use him any way you wanted. He was eating your pussy better than any guy you had come across.

“Fuckkkkkk JJ, Im gonna come.” You cried, gasping loudly as he sucked your clit harder. Your vision going white as you came, not realizing the liquid that came out of you. When you came down, youopened your eyes to see JJ looking at you like you were a prized possession.

“I just made you squirt…”

You widened your eyes, but before you could say anything, his mouth was back on you for the second time and you almost choked on your moan from how sensitive you were, but he didn’t care. He had a point to prove.

JJ slide two fingers into you, and started fingering you hard, and fast. Not caring about how loud you were, JJ watched as you continued to let out the most beautiful moans he had ever heard, and he wanted to heard more. He moved up to your mouth, placing his lips on yours but not giving you a full kiss. His ego got bigger as he watched your eyes twitch before they rolled in the back of your head.

“Hey hey..eyes on me or I’ll stop. I need two more baby, two more and I’ll think about taking it easy on you.” He whispered, his eyes never leaving yours, his lips finally found yours. You pulled your top down, pinching and playing with your breasts as you kissed him

He swallowed your moans, his fingers never letting up as you unraveled even more. He knew you were still sensitive, but you were so adamant and couldn’t stop running your mouth. It was his mission to give you what you been asking for. He tilted his head, pushing his tongue into your mouth, letting you suck on it before pulling it away, biting your bottom lip and letting it go. You were drunk off him and he hadn’t even fucked you yet. He gripped your face in his hands, squeezing your jaw to open it as he spat a big glob on spit into your mouth, smiling as he watched you swallow it and smile at him with your tongue out. You were a fucking freak. And he was going to take advantage of every minute of it.

JJ pulled away, but kept fingering you as he looked you in your face, watching even facial expression you make.

“Gimme another one, Gush on my fingers baby, I need it.” He whispered, fingering you harder, watching you writhe under him. He leaned down and took one of you nipples into his mouth, sucking and biting on the brown nub until you were a whining mess under him. He smiled against you.

“You talk all that bullshit, but look at you. A bitch for my fingers. A pogue. Wonder what your friends would think if they saw you.” He teased, slowly moving his fingers, his thumb rubbing at your clit harshly.

You smirked slowly, “What I do ain’t nobody business but mine, welcome to the roster big daddy.” You whispered, almost like a moan,

The way you were reacting to him made him want to do unimaginable things to you. He knew he had to really give it to you. You had too much mouth, never had anyone to put you in your fucking place. Tonight that changes, and JJ could give a fuck if anybody hears.

“Keep talking to me like that. It just makes me more eager to fuck you up mama. After I’m done with you, there won’t be a roster.” He replied, pinching your nipple, making you squeak.

He quickly pulled his fingers out of your pussy and shoved them in your mouth, making you suck them. You moaned, silently thanking yourself for your good hygiene. Your tongue moved slowly in between his fingers, moving from one finger to suck, and then the next, making sure you stick your tongue out to lick up his finger slowly as he watched you, biting his lip.

“You’re a fucking slut.” He laughed, pulling his fingers away and pushing you back on the bed. “But i’m not done with you.”

JJ’s then went back to your pussy, slurping on your juices as loud as he could as you shook under his touch, hold his head with both your hands as you thrusted into his mouth, biting your lip. He moaned against you, letting you use him as your thrusts started to get rougher.

“Fuck fuck fuckkkkk, I’m gonna fucking cum.” You cried, your face scrunched up in pleasure, using the same hand to hold him close to push him back, but he grabbed both hands and did his face in deeper, as you screamed, squirting on his dick.

“Stop running, or i’ll fuck you until you pass out.” He growled, before moving your legs up high, “Hold your legs up.”

You did as told, watch as he went from your pussy to your ass, suck on the rim. You gasped, from both pleasure and shock, watching as he went to town on your asshole, using his tongue to push past your rim, fucking your rim slowly. With you holding your legs up, rubbed your clit with one hand and pushed four fingers into your pussy with the other, thrusting aggressively

“Tell me how good i’m making you feel or i’ll stop right now and leave you right here.” He growled, sucking at the puckered hole, his hands still moving. Before you could say anything, you let out a loud gasped as you arched your back off the bed, squirting around JJ’s hands. Your legs shook violently as you came.

“Guess that said enough.” He laughed. “Suck my dick and I’ll think about giving you some dick mama.”

You said nothing, as you sat up and got in front of the bed, letting JJ move back to give you some space. You got on your knees and began rubbing his thighs, looking up at him with a drunk smile as he ran his hand across your cheek, before trialing up to your braids and gripping them hard. He used his other hand to hold his dick and guide it to your mouth, not giving you a chance to adjust to the size and length of his dick before he started thrusting into your mouth, Luckily for you, you give extremely good head, and adjusted quick, getting your mouth wet as he trusted in and out harshly. You wrapped your lips around his dick, watching as he hung his mouth open and let out a loud groan before taking his lip into his mouth and looking down at you as you looked up at him, tears in your eyes. It was the sexiest thing he had ever seen.

JJ gripped your hair with both hands now, thrusting even harder into your mouth until he couldn’t reach anymore, smirking as he watched you take his rough he was being. Your eyes looking up at him was the sexiest thing he had ever seen. He was looking foward to ruining you.

Before JJ could come, he pulled you off of him, leaning down to pick you up, and throw you right back on the bed, and turning you around on your hands and knees. He pushed down the middle of your back to deepen your arch, your ass perfectly in front of him. He moaned, giving your ass a loud smack causing you to gasp, before leaning down to kiss the area he hit.

“Read to get your life fucked up?” He asked, leaning down to kiss your forehead. You scoffed, wiping his kiss off.

“Fuck me, or don’t. Either way I’ll get fucked.” You shrugged, wanting to rile him up. JJ must’ve caught, because his face turned dark and before you knew it he was thrusting into you from behind, having a harsh grip on your hips, one that’ll probably bruise later. His head tipped back as he roughly fucked you from behind, using one hand to grab you by your back and pull you to him, his thrusts powerful and firm. A moan coming ron you ever thrust.

“Imagine…dick like this every day for the rest of your life.” He moaned, using both his hands to hold into your breasts, your whines becoming louder as you feel yourself about to come again. “Shit it’s so fucking good, i’m gonna fuck you up over … and over .. and over…”

You moaned at his words, as he pushed you back down, your face in the pillows as his foot was now on top of your head, angling your body so he could thrust deeper. His thrusts were ruthless, not letting up on you at all. You almost felt dizzy, but you couldn’t tap out…now now, he just started fucking you.

But it was so good, You grabbed onto his ankle of his foot that he planted on your head and started aggressively throwing your ass back, catching him off guard, his hands now on his own hips as he watched you do the work, sounds of smack and squelching along with your combined moaned filled the room.

“Jesus fuck, slow down.” He gasped, his head tilted back but you didn’t listen, in fact, you went harder, loving the small whimper that just escaped him.

JJ was in bliss, he smiled into the ceiling as he felt your ass crash back into his pelvis again and again. He rubbed his hands slowly up and down your back, loving the feeling of you gripping the shit out of his dick. He quickly pulled out of you, turning you on your back and immediately thrusted into you, leaning down on you, grabbing your neck with both hands and pounding you into the mattress until you kept tapping him, officially tapping out but that didn’t stop him, he smiled. He took one of his hands and slapped you across the face before placing it back on the side of your neck, spitting in your mouth.

“Nobody could ever fuck you like this. Fuckkkkkk.”

“Perfect fucking pussy. That dick feel good baby? Hm?.” He groaned, grabbing his phone from the nightstand before propping it up on the lamp right across from you and pressing record, and ramming his dick into you at a unforgiving pace, causing you to choke on your moan, your cream creating a white circle around his dick.

“Tell the camera who’s making you feel good.” He demanded, forcing you to look at the camera. You finally got a look at yourself, your braids were kinda frizzy, and your eyes were low and tearful as you tried your best to take what he was giving you.

“It’s yours, daddy. It’s all yours.” You cried, feeling yourself sauirt once again tonight, your legs shaking drastically. You cried against him as you came again. JJ smiled, pulling you in for a kiss. Never in your life have you submitted to a man…ever. It felt foreign, but good at the same time.

“Good job baby.” He praised, allowing you to come down from your high. “Too bad I didn’t come yet.”

Your body went limp as he pulled you to the edge of the bed, turning the lower half of your body to the side, before lining his dick up with your pussy and thrusting harshly before pulling out and doing it again. You slowly started to slide up away from him, your pussy too sore to keep going. JJ growled and yanked you back down before pounding into your pussy, grabbing your hip and your thigh as he punished you.

“Stop *thrust* fucking *thrust* running.” He snapped, in between thrusts, using one hand to slap harshly at your face before stuffing his fingers in your mouth.

“I want everybody to hear you. I want every man whose ever fucked your to hear you.” He moaned, grabbed the phone from the night stand and turning the camera to face you.

You were ethereal, your eyes big and glossy, lips puffy and raw from the kissing and biting. You had hit marks and buckles littered across your collar bone and neck. A true masterpiece. JJ smirked at the thought.

Your walls began squeezing around JJ, prompting him to want to nut faster. He leaned down, face to face, moaning against your check as his breathe hit the side of your face. JJ’s moana and groans were getting louder, more rough. Him pumping his dick into made you moan loud, the way he touched you, sucked you. You just might drop all your other hoes.

“G-god I’m gonna cum all in your fucking pussy. Gonna fill you up so fucking good mama.” He could feel his orgasm coming as he watched your face etched in pleasure. JJ bit his lip, tilting his head back and he thrusted harder into you, chasing his own orgasm, the bed hitting the wall with every thrust.

“W-wait JJ- I’m not on birth control.” You gasped, clenching around him. He hummed.

“Guess we’ll be busy for the next 9 months.”

JJ thrusted into you one hard time before letting himself go inside you, moaning as he looked down at where you were connected and kept thrusting slowly, fucking his cum back into you as much as he could. When he was finished, he pulled out of you, laughing at your fucked out, cock drunk state.

Your body was limp, only thing moving being your chest because of how hard you were breathing. Your eyes towards the ceiling, not sparing JJ a glance as he looked at you lovingly.

“Hope you know this means your mine now pretty girl.”

You couldn’t do anything but nod, which made him laugh.

“Told you I could handle you.”

[carlyraejepsans]

would you be okay pitching ghost trick to someone who doesn’t rly know anything about it? i’ve heard of it before and that it’s good but idk why, and i don’t really get a lot out of advertisements or game descriptions

you know the toby-typical campiness in how he writes his characters in UTDR? over the top, extremely iconic, clearly working from preestablished tropes but doing his own special spin on them? put toby fox on acid and you've got shu takumi's writing style.

ghost trick isn't "just" good. ghost trick is the type of good that invents a whole new categorization for itself. ghost trick invented a situation to put little fictional bitches in that is so good, the most popular works in the tag are people from other fandoms being like "oh shit, let me put MY fictional bitches through in this situation as well"

it is one of the most hooking, satisfyingly delivered mysteries I've ever seen in a videogame. there is not a single second of the game that feels unutilised, everything pushes you forward in the mystery, and still it never feels choking. the way it handles tension and delivers its information is phenomenal. if this were a normal recommendation i would start talking about the gameplay and how fun and good it feels to play and how genuinely clever it is but you're not here for that, are you, so let me tell you the real selling point: every single character in this game is fucking insane. not a single one of them is normal. it's a noir. it's a parody. it's an animator's wet dream. my friend is playing the game on stream and they said his fiancée can tell when we're streaming because she can hear him doing his pathetic man voice on call.

listen to me. you will fall in love with sissel. i played One Shot earlier this year. i thought i was never going to find a game with a protagonist that crawled into my heart as much as niko. i was wrong. jesus christ i was wrong. you need to understand, this is a puzzle game. once you know the answers that's it for the gameplay. the replay value is extremely low. I have replayed it 5 times in three weeks just to make the wrong choices and watch what sissel says and quips about it. he's my guy. i need to hold his face in my hands. you will see his fuckass red suit, you will see his fuckass banana hair, you willl see his goofy little smile and his dirk strider ass sunglasses and you will whimper like a DOG because you miss him so much. i am missing him right now as we speak. fuck.

play ghost trick.

[bloomzone]

Feeling Overwhelmed? You're Not Alone. Let's Talk About It..

I know we all go through it. You’re balancing school, friends, family, and everything else, and suddenly, it feels like you're carrying the weight of the world. Lately, I've been feeling burned out, overwhelmed, and like everything is piling up at once. With school stress, exams, and the constant pressure to keep up, I sometimes feel like I can’t breathe. It's exhausting, and I'm sure some of you feel the same.

It’s so easy to get stuck in the cycle of trying to do everything perfectly. Every time you think you’ve got it under control, something else comes at you, and you’re back to square one and YES THIS IS ANNOYING!!!. It's like there’s a never-ending list of things to do, and no matter how hard you work, you never seem to catch a break.

And the worst part? The pressure from others. Whether it's friends, classmates, or even family, there's always someone asking you for help. Sometimes I feel like I’m the go-to person for everything—assignments, questions, last-minute requests. And don’t get me wrong, I want to be helpful, but it can get draining. Especially when you're trying to hold it together and just need a little space for yourself

For example:Today I couldn’t catch a break already stressed about exams, and in desperate need of rest. Just as I sat down to breathe, the calls and messages started.

One of my classmates began spamming me with messages, asking about a history and geography exam date that we ALL already knew. Then, another classmate began asking for English assignment answers. She wouldn’t stop. She kept sending, “Hi, hi, hi, hi…” over and over until I caved and responded.When I finally sent her the answers, her response? “Ahh, what would I do without you? You’re a lifesaver!” And while I know she meant it kindly, it felt so heavy I feel guilty. What about MY life? What about my peace?

In that moment, I realized how much I was giving to others and how little I was leaving for myself. I was pouring all my energy into helping everyone else while I was running on empty

And plus I’ve been in those moments when you’ve studied hard for an exam, thought you’re finally catching up, and then suddenly—a change happens. A test gets rescheduled, an assignment gets pushed to the last minute, and it feels like everything you worked for was just... wasted. I get it. And it’s okay to feel frustrated and angry about it. You’re allowed to feel this way. It doesn’t make you weak, it makes you human.

But here’s something I’ve been reminding myself lately: I am not responsible for everyone else's stress. It’s okay to say no, it’s okay to take a break, and it’s okay to not always have everything figured out. Taking care of yourself isn’t selfish; it’s necessary.

Here 5 Tips That Are Helping Me Cope with Stress and Burnout

1. Set Boundaries and Protect Your Energy: I’ve learned that it’s okay to say no. If someone’s asking for help, and you’re already feeling stretched thin, it’s okay to tell them, “I can’t right now.” You can’t pour from an empty cup, and you deserve your time and energy as much as anyone else does.

2. Don’t Overload Yourself—Take It One Step at a Time: Break your tasks into smaller, more manageable chunks. Don’t try to do everything at once—focus on one thing at a time. It makes the workload feel less daunting and more achievable. One task, one hour at a time.

3. Rest is Not a Luxury, It’s a Necessity: Sometimes we push ourselves too hard because we think we’ll get behind if we take a break. But if you don’t rest, you’ll burn out. Give yourself permission to step away, even for just 10 minutes. Watch a comforting youTube video, take a walk, or close your eyes. A little time for yourself can give you the energy to come back even stronger.

4. Talk About Your Feelings—Don't Bottle It Up: If you’re feeling overwhelmed, don’t keep it inside. Talk to someone, whether it’s a friendu trust family member, or even just writing in a journal like I do ..Putting your feelings into words can make a huge difference. It clears your mind and helps you see things from a new perspective.

5. Make Time for Self-Care: It’s easy to forget to take care of yourself when everything is going wrong. But self-care isn’t just about face masks and bubble baths (although that helps!). It’s about doing things that recharge you—reading, listening to music, or even just doing nothing. Find what makes you feel lighter and make time for it.

Let’s Take the Pressure Off Ourselves.

I know the world often tells us we have to be constantly productive, constantly moving forward. But the truth is, you don’t have to hustle all the time. It’s okay to slow down, take a breather, and focus on your well-being. The world will still be there when you're ready to take the next step. You are not a machine pookie. You are human, and you deserve peace.We’re not alone in this, even though it sometimes feels like we are. Everyone’s going through something, and sometimes just knowing that you’re not alone in your struggles can make a huge difference.Remember, it’s okay to not have it all together. It’s okay to be tired, to feel burnt out, to not always know what’s next. Life is hard, but you’re still here, still fighting, and that’s something to be proud of. I'm so proud of you

© bloomzone

[glitter-stained]

Jason Todd Meta: My opinion on the csa headcanon

Does Jason's behaviour suggest he was a victim of csa?

There is very little, in terms of clinical signs, that’s going to point to csa specifically, because most symptoms, for psychiatric disorders, aren’t specific to one disorder or cause. One thing that’s usually a good hint would be children making very sexual statements/references/jokes/behaviours that are very inappropriate in context (a good example of this would be Roman Roy from Succession); night terrors are bed wettings amongst children/teenagers over a certain age. But that is absolutely not necessary: many, if not most victims of csa don’t display these specific signs, and a twelve years old that suffers from night terrors is not necessarily a victim of csa. The one thing that tells you for sure, in a person with trauma, that they have been a victim of csa, is that they’re telling you they have been a victim of csa. I’m insisting on that part because there’s a whole bunch of therapists (cough cough psychanalysts) that will tell you confidently that your psychiatric symptoms stem from a childhood sexual trauma (cherry on top of the shit cake if it’s incestuous) that you didn’t know about because you’ve repressed it. I repeat, that’s bullshit. If you meet a clinician who tells you that, RUN. So, a warning: this is probably the least “psychological analysis” of my “Jason psychological analysis posts”, because Jason’s symptoms do not allow us to conclude formally for or against a history of sexual abuse. But that doesn’t mean we can’t do some meta, make sure we're on the same page with what's analyzed here, some textual analysis, discuss what the csa headcanon does and does not imply in terms of his behaviour. I think it’s a good idea to start with it so we know where we’re standing with our analysis, regardless of the fact it’s maybe not the most interesting in terms of psychopathology and neuropsychology.

A couple of disclaimers:

I only talk about the comics I want to talk about. This is for two reasons, which are that 1) I do what I want and if I don’t like/don’t find something interesting, I’m not gonna waste time on it; and 2) I’ve been reading comics for a couple of months only, and there are, like, a lot of them. If there are comics you wanna see analysed under that lense, feel free to suggest them! I might not want to, but it also could be that I haven’t read them yet. Additionally, I'm not interested in questioning the morality of Jason's actions here. Ethics are fun, and I like talking about them sometimes, and morality sometimes has a place in talks about demonization but largely speaking this isn't the space for that. I separate talk about morality and psychology stuff as much as I can for a reason, so if you are looking here for excuses for his behaviour or arguments as to why he is a bad person, you're in the wrong place. Moral judgement is irrelevant here for the most part.

On the events of Red Hood: Lost Days:

Jason has, at some point in the comics, been a victim of csa. When Talia kisses Jason before pushing him off a cliff right after he got out of the Lazarus Pit, and when she initiates sex with him in Lost Days, that’s not consent!! That’s a grown woman taking advantage of a traumatized teenager who is, on top of that, deeply indebted to her. That’s a predatory act, with a steep power imbalance, it’s sexual assault, and on top of that there’s an element of suggested pseudo-incest. That decision was retconned, and thank god, because it was a brutal assassination of Talia’s character based on a good bit of racism, and also because the way it was portrayed doesn’t make it clear that Jason is a victim in a situation rather than that super annoying trope of “teenage guy gets to bang a hot MILF and hahaha lucky him”, writing a male character in a situation of SA without acknowledging it as SA or taking it seriously is one of the tropes I hate most, it reinforces stigmatisation and isolates victims. For all of these reasons, I’m not gonna include that element in my analysis, but it’s important to note that if you do include those scenes in your conception of it, then Jason is undeniably a victim of csa and everything discussed about it applies to him.

What if it were a lie?

I’ve said it before (and I’ll say it again), I deeply, violently hate headcanons/tropes where a character lies about being a victim of csa (whether it’s for manipulation, personal gain, any reason really I don’t care). It’s rare as fuck in real life, however it’s a common trope that feeds into fear of being wrongfully accused that causes push-back and increases social stigmatization. CSA is a painful thing associated with intense feelings of shame and already a deep fear of not being believed. Imagine making a considerable effort to seek help after something terrible happened/is happening to you, and you have to brave your fear of not being believed on top of that, and once you’ve made all that effort you get rejected and villainized because it’s just easier for the person you’re reaching out to not to believe it. So I’m awfully weary of this type of headcanon, and I think a general rule of thumb is “if your interpretation of what the character is saying is that he’s talking about how he was abused, especially if he’s talking about sexual assault, then it happened.” If you don’t like that, if you don’t feel like that’s good representation, then you can question the story, think it should be retconned, or rethink your interpretation of what the character says if it’s ambiguous, but hcing that the character lied about his assault is not a hypothesis we’re going to accept here no matter what. So we can start by scratching that one out: Jason never lies about being a victim of csa, or wilfully hints at it even though that’s untrue, at any point.

Two other ideas I’ve seen floating around that I think are worth mentioning:

No, just because Jason lived in the streets as a kid doesn’t mean the only way he survived was through underage prostitution. I genuinely don’t understand that idea, yes being a street kid makes you extremely vulnerable, yes it makes the risk of resolving to underage prostitution to survive higher but it’s absolutely not a fatality. That idea is, quite frankly, weird. Do you automatically assume if a real life person tells you they were in the streets for some time at a kid that they are a victim of csa? Also, I've seen the idea go around that because some people have a strong reading/hc of Jason as bi (which I have no problem with I love bi Jason), that would be an argument in favour of the csa hc. Please don’t do that. There’s no link between queer sexual orientations and childhood sexual abuse, that’s a harmful myth that we should work to deconstruct or, at the very least, not continue to vehiculate.

Another important thing to keep in mind: childhood sexual abuse =/= childhood sexual trauma.

Now, a traumagenic situation is a situation that might induce trauma (so development of, acute stress disorder, ptsd, cptsd, derealization, any traumatic pathology really). These situations exist on a continuum of probability to be traumatized by this situation. For example, a flood, a car accident, witnessing a murder and being sexually assaulted are all traumagenic situations, but the probability of developing trauma from them are very different. It hinges on personal, situational, social, and environmental risk factors (that have nothing to do with being weak, anybody can develop trauma). A definition for traumagenic situations can be found in the diagnostic criteria for ptsd in the dsm-5:

A. “Exposure to actual or threatened death, serious injury, or sexual violence in one (or more) of the following ways:

1. Directly experiencing the traumatic event(s).

2. Witnessing, in person, the event(s) as it occurred to others.

3. Learning that the traumatic event(s) occurred to a close family member or close friend. In cases of actual or threatened death of a family member or friend, the event(s) must have been violent or accidental.

4. Experiencing repeated or extreme exposure to aversive details of the traumatic event(s) (e.g., first responders collecting human remains; police officers repeatedly exposed to details of child abuse). Note: Criterion A4 does not apply to exposure through electronic media, television, movies, or pictures, unless this exposure is work related.”

Note that the this last criteria has been added from the DSM-5 in order to explain cases of PTSD observed in at-risk jobs like cops exposed to repeated detailed child abuse, first responders collecting human remains, or, crucially, vigilantes repeatedly exposed to brutal crimes. This means that Jason, when he works on the Dumpster Slasher case, when he is horrified to find Gloria in the immediate aftermath of her rape (and later finds her dead body, because witnessing the consequences of these traumatic events is also an important component of that second-hand trauma), is being exposed to a very traumagenic situation. As I said before, that doesn’t necessarily mean you will experience trauma (thank fuck for that), but there are factors that influence that. SA related situations has an already pretty high probability of inducing trauma. On top of that, age is a big factor in that: the younger you are, the less resources, emotional regulation, development and coping mechanisms to face the traumagenic event you have (though there is such a thing as “too young to have PTSD" -when your memory is simply not developed enough for the memory to traumatize you because you will not remember the event.) At fifteen, with his memory fully developed but his brain going through so much changes because of teenagehood and his past history, Jason would be at risk. On top of that, you’re more at risk to get traumatized if you’re already stressed out when the event happens, so Jason’s mental state at this point in his robin run is also a risk factor. All to say, it’s very plausible for Jason to have sexual trauma without being a victim of sexual abuse in relation to canon events. Besides, in headcanon territory when it comes to Jason’s childhood before Robin, there are so many ways to be exposed to sexual violence : witnessing/finding his mother being a victim (considering the position of extreme vulnerability Catherine was in), witnessing assault in the streets, being the victim of attempted SA and escaping, watching street kids get picked up and later find their bodies/being told by other kids, as a cautionary tale, in excruciating detail, testimonies of their own assault… Or for example, if we’re thinking about Arkham Knight, being constantly threatened with SA, it being hinted and joked about and hanging over him like a sword of Damocles is something I could see Joker and other inmates do that could definitely induce sexual trauma even if it doesn’t happen ; what matters most, in trauma, is that the fear is real. Mechanically, when we’re looking at the way trauma works even on a biological level, the overwhelming fear is at the core of the pathology. (This is also why you can develop PTSD after a psychotic episode.) Like, my point isn’t that one of these things happened to Jason, or that he has to have sexual trauma from the events of the Diplomat’s Son or anything -mostly just that this is a possibility, something very serious that happens and an important nuance that I never see in discussions on the csa headcanon, and while it’s not exactly what the debate is about, I think it’s something important to ponder.

Do you consider the csa hc to be canon?

So, there are a lot of Jason stories, and I’m very pro “not take in account what is said in comics you dislike in your conception of canon” because if I did that absolutely no bat character would be readable, I have to believe that no character is defined by their worst writers. And boy, does Jason have a lot of bad writing… On top of the personal retcons, there are also the canon retcons: like Battle for The Cowl is retconned… Unless someone decides to reinject/revamp it into the narrative (please don’t please don’t it’s irrecuperable let it lay with the Flying Todds where it belongs). So, let’s see. There are three writers/arcs that imply/mention the csa hc: Starlin’s writing of Jason’s post-crisis Robin Run (canon though some stuff in it seems to have been retconned), Winick’s writing in Green Arrow: Seeing Red (canon as far as I know), and Battle for the Cowl (retconned). It’s worth noting that one of those are considered to be foundational works for Jason’s character (Jason’s post crisis Robin Run and Starlin’s part in it), and another was written by Winick, who wrote the other two foundational Jason stories: Under The Red Hood and Red Hood: Lost Days. On a personal level, I’m very mitigated about what I like and accept about it. I base my whole love and characterization of Jason about his post-crisis Robin Run, I love that little guy so much, Starlin’s take on Jason’s Robin Run is absolutely canon to me (which does not mean I like Starlin as a writer, thank you very much). On the other hand of the spectrum, the only reason Battle for the Cowl isn’t my least favourite comic ever is because The Killing Joke exists, absolutely not canon, get this thing away from me. And then in the middle, my feelings on Seeing Red (on the entirety of Winick’s Jason really) vary depending on the day, because I do like a revenge story that challenges the status quo with tropes of “bad victim” and it sets up Jason as a character based on love rather than morals which I adore, but there are also some elements of psychophobia in the writing that I (who approach stories through the filter of psychopathology first and foremost) can’t just look past, and also the way it intertwines with classist stereotypes. So do I consider Seeing Red to be canon? In good faith, yes, but whether I’ll accept it as such really depends on the day. In terms of the csa headcanon: it’s heavily hinted in BTFC but not outright said, it’s there as a undercurrent in Starlin’s run because of his intention (to make Jason die of AIDS). And then we have Seeing Red. Basically Jason lists elements about Mia’s life, including her past with underage prostitution (so, just to be very clear, csa), and says they’re very similar, having both lived on the streets, and understand having to do bad things when it’s necessary. This is not the same as saying “I was a victim of csa”, and what he’s saying could be interpreted differently (we know that he was stealing tires, and “only what he needs to survive”, so he could have been referencing small-time theft.) So, it could be a reference to something else, I totally understand why some people want to interpret differently. It just… Feels like such a weird and weak argument to be equating boosting tires to underage prostitution, to me it’s very ooc (in comparison to UTH Jason), and it would feel like weak writing from someone like Winick. Aka it’s not technically canon, and you don’t have to accept it as such(I understand the mentality of "I'm rejecting this interpretation because it feels like demonization of csa victims" perfectly), but personally I think it takes a lot from Jason’s character in Seeing Red and from this story in general.

[holylulusworld]

Wrong message

Summary: A case of the wrong number…

Pairing: Lloyd Hansen x fem!reader

Warnings: drunk reader, possible alcohol abuse, wrong number trope, implied breaking and entering, implied dark Lloyd (nothing happens)

“Just do it, just do it!” Your friends cheer you on. They are a bad influence, and you shouldn’t spend time with them. Today, they got you drunk. Margaritas are the devil’s work without a doubt. “Message, Mr. sexy ass!”

“Ughh… we had half a date, Kelly,” you slur, failing to unlock your phone. Your eyes are blurry, and you can’t focus on your passcode. “I don’t think he’ll answer.”

“Hey, I called my ex and asked him to send me a dick pic! You won’t chicken out now! It’s always the same with you. You’re no fun.” Kelly accuses you of being lame.

“Fine, I’ll do it,” you curse yourself, but being called lame angers you. “Let me just unlock my phone.”

“I don’t think she can talk,” Cheryl giggles before taking a large sip from her third margarita.

“She can message him,” Kelly replies quickly. “If he doesn’t answer, she can still call him.

“Damn it, bitch!” You curse your phone. “6969.” You giggle as you finally remember your passcode. “Here we go! Be prepared for—”

“The hottest pick-up line ever,” Cheryl cheers you on, while Kelly smirks at your wrecked state. Sam and Adriana already passed out and snored loudly. Not very graceful or hot.

“Hmm…” you scrunch up your face, thinking hard. Your foggy brain makes it difficult to think straight, so you write the first thing that comes to your mind. “Alright.”

Hey, sexy…🍆🍆

You harrumph and stare at your phone as he doesn’t answer.

Are you there, sexy…

… Three dots are all you get. You wait for him to answer, but the dots disappear.

“I don’t think he’s online,” you lie and try to close the chat. “Maybe another time.”

“No, now,” Kelly insists. All of you saw her ex's dick and made fun of her for settling for a tiny and crooked wiener for so long.

You scoff but type the next message. You may be more forward this time.

I wanna suck your dick so bad. I want to feel you shoot your cum down my throat and make your toes curl, and after, you can eat my pussy until I squirt in your face.

… The dots blink for a second, and then, he replies…

Who’s this? Is this a joke? I swear you’ll regret messing with me, sunshine!

“Fuck! Fuck!” You look at the number, realizing it’s not Scott’s number. You cry reading a stranger's reply. “I texted the wrong number!” You glare at Kelly. “That’s all your fault. Now some random creep has my number!”

“Fuck…shit!” Cheryl panics. “Okay. Just text him back and tell him it was a case of a mistaken number. He’ll understand. You can block his number if he’s a creep!”

“Okay! Good idea!” You try to stop your hands from shaking before you reply.

Oops…sorry dude. Wrong number. I hope you have a good night!

He immediately replies to your message this time.

Hell no, this is the right number, cupcake. Tell me where you are, and you can suck my nuts too. I’ll pay you back and let you ride my stache.

“Ride his stache?” Kelly cackles, much to your dismay. She can be a little too much sometimes. You still feel bad for texting the wrong guy, and she has to laugh about your mishap. “Who wears a mustache? Only losers.”

“You don’t even know the guy,” you huff. “This is your fault.”

Suddenly sober, you close the app and decide to forget about your mistake. He will get that you’re not interested in sucking a stranger’s dick.

Some hours later, your friends left, and you’re drifting in and out of your drunken haze. You groan, feeling something tickle your foot.

“Fuck off,” you grumble and kick the invisible hand touching you. “I’m tired.”

“Now, now,” you hear someone purr in your ear, “is that the way to treat a man flying down here to eat that cunt?”

A cold shiver runs down your spine, and you sit up, screaming, as the stranger is standing in your bedroom.

“Who are you? What are you doing here?”

“I came to collect.” He smirks and slowly slides the zipper of his pants down. “I hope your mouth is as good as you promised…”

Tags in reblog.

[stellarbit]

1000 Follower Celebration

I never thought much of my work so I've waited to do celebrate until 1000. For those who've followed and anyone who liked, commented, or reblogged anything, here is an event as thanks. Please know that this blog and those in this fandom mean so much to me. I read every tag, comment, and reblog and they make my day every time.

If you've followed me for awhile you'll know my writing can be slow and fickle. As a thank you I am committing to fulfilling the requests I receive between November 23rd - November 30th. After that I'll be closing my requests until I work through them.

Now let's get to it!!

Some quick rules

Pick up to 3 prompts.

I'll take individual character requests or something like "members of the 501st/Bad Batch reacting to" requests as well.

I will be doing requests for Clones/Star Wars first and then any previous fandoms I've written for.

I will not be taking anon requests for this event

Let me know what character(s) you want.

If you have them, please state SFW/NSFW preferences

If you have them, please state what gender preference you have.

I retain the right to not write prompts that are uncomfortable/extreme for me.

Tell me as many details as you want, it really helps! You can DM me too if you'd like to discuss.

If you've submitted previous request you'd still like done, feel free to send it again. Tumblr has vanished some requests and I've never seen them again

Please be patient, I waited until life calmed down to focus on this event but writing takes time.

Prompt List

My favorite prompts are the personal ones. If you've been going through anything and you'd like comfort, distraction, or in character advice from your favs, I'm here for you. It's been helpful for me and I'd love to do that for you. Be as specific as you want <3

I'll take continuation requests for previous fics. (I am working on Two Faces pt 3 and aim to finish the Hound drabbles from the past, so if its for them don't you worry, just be patient please.)

Tropes

And there was one bed~

Love at first sight

Hate at first sight

Fake dating

Locked in together

Aphrodisiac

Amnesia

Sharing body heat

Kissing as a distaction

Dying confession

X denying their feelings for Y until Y shows interest in someone else.

X teaching Y something

Carrying bridal style

Confessing during fight

Romance/Fluff

“I think I’m in love with you.”

“I didn’t know love until you.”

“You’d be easy to love.”

“You are my equal in every way.”

“I will never stop fighting for you.”

“If there was anyone meant for me, it was you.”

“You say you love me, but you don’t know me.” “Then let me.”

“They don’t compare to you. No one does/ever has.”

“Don’t look at me like that.” “Like what?” “Like you love me.”

“I could make you feel better.”

“Beautiful.”

Angst:

“We could’ve been us.”

“I don’t want your apology.”

“It would be easier if I didn’t know you.”

“You said you wouldn’t leave and then you did.”

“I feel like I’m falling apart.”

“All I’ve ever wanted is for you to see me.”

“What is it about me that isn’t good enough?”

“At least I kept my promise.”

“Does he/she/they not know about me?”

“You look exactly the same.”

Funny&Misc

“You’re family.”

“Bite me.”

“What a pretty sight.”

“Get over it.”

“I thought you couldn’t stand me.” “I lied.”

“You’re bleeding.” “No shit.”

“Do you believe in soulmates?” “No.”

“I thought I was alone.”

“Stop staring at me to distract me.” “Oh, I’m not trying to distract you.”

“I can’t remember the last time I laughed like this.”

“Are my eyes deceiving me or is that a smile, my love?” “Oh, shut up.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen something go so wrong so fast.”

“Do you believe in soulmates?” “No.”

“What kind of dumb question is that?”

“Don’t even think about it.”

"it wouldn’t hurt you to smile you know." “it will.”

“I can do it myself.”

“What a tease.”

“I’m hilarious.” “You’re traumatized.” “Is there a difference?”

“All this sneaking around is going to get us into trouble.”

LETS DOOO IT THANK Y'ALL

[katiascraft]

𝄞⨾𓍢ִ໋ "Maybe i should've told you i miss you. I almost said it but i don't know if you feel the same" | OP81 ✧₊⁺

Parings: oscar piastri x singer!reader

Summary: your insecurities lead to lose your favorite person in the world but destiny always plays his worst (or best cards) for you. In the aftermath of it all, two souls come together as one (again). Or that’s what they’d like.

Word count: 6k.

Warnings: mentions of anxiety, insecurities and depression. Just angst. And a little fluff. Centered on a few songs of Gracie abrams that will be mentioned on the story (just if you want to listen to them while reading). Not a native English speaker so there could be (so many) errors. Not proofread.

Author's note: this is the longest fic I wrote but im so happy with it! I just hope you liked it as much as I do! (I like to suffer 🙃) I should be writing essays tho. Don’t forget to like, reblog or comment! And follow me so we can be friends :3 (and drink mate together!)

MASTERLIST

The ticking clock ── .✦

You took a deep breath. Your hands were shaking and your stress levels were at their peak.

“You are always picking fights, y/n. I'm tired, "Oscar said, clearly annoyed. Is not that you always fought or had a toxic relationship, no. but lately, things got harder between you two. Stupid fights now and then. Dead silence that creeps you out everytime. Coldness was the new dynamic you had going on. And it hurts.

Everyday hurts lately.

“Oscar, I'm not always picking fights. For fucks sake, just wanted to know why you are so cold all the time to me!” you didn't want to raise your tone but desperation never took the best out of you. He was shocked, his head disapproving. Probably done with all of this. Done with you. You didn't want to admit it but maybe it was true. 

“I'm not being cold to you, y/n. I already explained it to you: I'm tired. My job it's complicated enough to come home to be even more complicated. Just stop” he said leaving the kitchen, leaving you behind hanging in your words. That made you so you followed him down to the living room. 

“Oscar, don't leave me talking alone, please! Why do you always have to run away? I have feelings actually you know? I would love to express them to my lover so we can have a proper conversation, what do you think about that?”

“y/n, bullshit. Don't act like I'm a monster who doesn't listen to you. If i didnt we wouldn't have this argument. Stop playing the victim for once. You don't hear me out either anyway” he gritted his teeth trying not to follow you down with your anger. He didn't want to raise his voice towards you. 

“Playing victim? You're impossible oscar. I only asked you a fucking question, what did i do wrong for you to ignore me and act so cold? And you said you're just tired and that's bullshit” you were so angry by now. Offended. Hurt by his words. Hurt by the fact you were happy once and now everything is falling apart. You never hurt this deep before. 

“It's not!” he couldn't anymore with all of this. He didn't want to raise his voice but you made him feel exasperated. “You see? You don't trust me! Im telling you im just tired and you say its bullshit and then you play the victim card that i dont listen to you and im a fucking monster? I see how things go now. I'm done” he didn't even want to look at you. He just sat on the sofa looking at the floor. But you heard what he said under his breath. What you were most scared of what’s happening. 

You started crying out of desperation, anxious that all of this was gonna end right there and then. You just left him there and went back to the kitchen as if that way he wouldn't see nor hear you crying. You just couldn't keep talking or being around him. Your heart was sinking.

He sighed frustrated and stood up sprinting to his studio and banging the door. You gasped hearing the door closing so violently. No that he noticed what he said. Nor that he cared you thought he didnt care you anymore, that was for sure. 

(...)

You haven't talked to Oscar since yesterday. He didn't sleep at your shared apartment. He said he didn't want to see you. That hurt a lot. Your heart was already broken. You didn't know what to do anymore. You've been on this rabbit hole for several months. You didn't understand what broke between you or when it was. You felt confused, lonely and scared. What would your whole life be without him? Once, you only wrote love songs because what you felt for him was beyond what your body could handle so you needed to take it out. Now, you didn't write anything for months. You felt too much sadness, it felt like you didn't feel anything at all. Just emptiness. 

You were playing with your food, not really that hungry that you thought you would be. Another night alone without him. Would life be like this when he gets rid of me? I don't wanna leave. 

The doorbell rang. You frowned, not sure who it could be knowing it was almost 10pm and I couldn't sleep (just as yesterday and every time you had an argument with him). You looked through the little visor of the door seeing your boyfriend was back home. But telling from the look on his face, things wouldn't be better anyway. You opened the door after taking a deep breath not sure if you would survive another fight. 

You two just looked at each other for a few seconds. Probably analyzing how you were feeling now that 2 days have passed by. Neither of you smiled. Not that you had the energy or a reason to anymore. You moved from the door so he could get into the apartment and closed the door once he was in. 

“Did I wake you up?” he asked quietly. You swallowed hard not knowing what to say by this point.

“I can't sleep since you are gone, so. No, you didn't” you didn't want to sound cold, especially after you fought because he was acting like that with you,but you felt like shit and didnt have energy to pretend you were okay with it all. You felt miserable. He nodded without saying a word and looked at the floor for a moment. 

After a moment of really uncomfortable silence you broke it with something you didn't even think would slip out your mouth “are you seeing someone else, oscar?” your words cut through him as if they were sharp glass pieces just thrown directly at him. 

“What?” He was surprised and hurt that you thought about him like that. You shrug.

“I mean, it's not that you don't kiss me anymore, so.and i think you're not tired because of your job, i think you're just bored of me, tired of me, done with me” you sat on the kitchen table again. He followed you there but stayed standard. He was confused and hurt now. 

“When did I ever say that to you?” he was tired of all of this, for sure. But he wanted to make things work with you. He just didn't know how to.  It was hard for him to understand you, but he was trying. He finally sat in front of you staring at your plate. It was full, you kept playing with your doodles, pretending to eat like you used to. He felt so guilty for all of this. He knew at that moment. That he broke you. He didn't know how or when but he did. His face softened in sadness.

“You said it. You said you were done and you know what? I get it. I mean, it's not as if I am easy to love. I know I'm complicated and a pain in the ass for everyone so I wouldn't be surprised if you found someone else that makes you happy for real and you don't wanna tell me out of pity. I'm ready to hear it though. Just say it” your voice was empty and plain no emotion detected just numbness. He didn't want to think it was too late. It Has been a long time since he has seen you like this. At that time it wasn't him who made you feel like it. 

“I didn't mean to say it, y/N. I Was tired because of work and fighting with you. I don't like fighting with you. I wanna make things right, please. I wouldn't ever do that to you, you know it” he explained desperate for a moment. He wanted you to believe him. But your face didn't say anything. He couldn't read you and made him scared. You looked unbothered, way far gone now.  

You shook your head “i know you mean it and i know you are tired, but i don't think you really want to be with me anymore” your sincerity cut like a knife in both of you. Like, you over thought a lot about it but it still hurt. He was lost and didn't know what was going on anymore or was going through all of that. “You didn't deny it either” you continued.

“I'm not with anyone else, y/N, please” he cut you off with his deep voice, kind of cracky now. 

(...) 

You just didn't know how you ended up moaning his name once more. His mouth is in your centre. His hands are grabbing your tights. Your fingers on his hair.

How easy is it, right? To love someone. One moment, you destroy them.. Then, you fix them with makeup sex. Making them see the stars so they forget how shitty things are. So that pleasure it's more important than gentle affection. Always pretending to be sane then doing insane shit like this as if memory didn't exist when it came to you and him. As if feeling him inside you was the only thing that could fix your mind. That it was the only way to communicate properly. As if it was your love language, then ignore each other. 

His mands of your body grabbing you as if you were about to break and he was trying to keep all of your pieces together. As if he could save you or your relationship that was already 10 feet down buried. He would like to think sex could fix it. That it was the best to communicate if then you didn't trust him. He was hurt and you didn't trust him. You were hurt because he didn't love you anymore. Unfortunately, your minds couldn't agree. You were the love of his life, he wanted to help and make you trust him. But you just didn't, you already convinced yourself he didn't love you anymore and that everyone was better than you. He wanted a team when you just wanted to run away from him. Or from yourself? 

Destruction ── .✦

“I'm done with you for real, y/n! Everytime an important day comes for me, you just like to ruin it!” He was mad as hell. Fed up with all your bullshit. 

“You really think I do it on purpose? oscar! “ He left the room so you started following him around your shared apartment. “I wouldn't if you didn't ignore like you always do! I don't know what to do anymore! Nothing seems enough for you!” you started crying out. Your heart couldn't take it anymore and this time it felt different. So much different than any time before.

“Why is it always my fault? Why am I always the one doing something wrong? The only thing you do is complain about me and then you just want me to kiss you?! You are insane!” His words cut you deep, so deep you thought they cut you in half and you were nothing anymore. You couldn't breathe for a moment. He called you insane just the way your parents made you feel your whole life. Maybe they were right after all. You deserved all of those years in a psychiatric hospital. You deserved even when he

 was the first one to say your parents were monsters and you were more than okay. More than normal. More than lovable. How ironic, right?You wanted to laugh but couldn't. You just couldn't move. 

Oscar realised what he said. He knew when he saw you. He felt terrible at that moment.

“Look, y/n i-” you cut him not wanting to listen to him anymore. 

“Dont talk” you said shaky under your breath. You had to sit down on the sofa because you felt you were about to faint. In shock - a lot of moments of your relationship replayed in your head. How could someone who said he loved you more than anything and anyone, end up thinking just as your parents? It was your fault. Of course it was. How could you ever think someone would love you? You were miserable. How can someone love a miserable person? 

Oscar started breathing heavily and he had to sit on the floor trying to calm down. He is always so collected and rational, these kinds of feelings he had never experienced, not even with his ex. 

“We can't be together Oscar, I make you miserable. And you're right. I'm insane, how could someone love me right? No one wants to deal with my bullshit, not even myself” you said quietly. His throat closed for a moment. He remained in silence for a few seconds processing your words. You didn't look at each other, you couldn't. Guess this was it. How sad, right? Oscar started crying realizing what was about to come.

“I promise y/N, I'm sorry for what I said. I didn't mean it that way. You aren't hard to love, actually the opposite. But yeah, i don't think this is working for us anymore whether i like it or not” he said wiping his tears out of his face as he could. 

You nodded even though you didn't hear a word he said. It was over. Your life is over. 

Do you ever think of me? ── .✦

It's been exactly 8 months and 25 days since you and Oscar were not together anymore. Yes, you had a countdown. You created it to see how far you’ll survive because you didn't believe you would last this much. You thought your life was over and for a few weeks it was. You didn't get out of bed. The break up depression, i guess. Your friends suggested you go back to therapy because they were really worried about you and your mental health. They knew how much Oscar meant to you: he was your everything. And to be honest, that was your first mistake going into the relationship with him. 

You shouldn't have made him your everything because you were nothing suddenly when you left. You didn't know who you were without him, what you liked or what you would like to be. All of your future plans had him in them. There wasn't a future without him. He was everywhere in your life. You shaped your destiny around him. You wanted to get married and have kids with him. And you never wanted to be a mother but he had changed that until he was gone. 

You couldn't go back to dating. You tried but failed every time. You were a little too afraid to get hurt again. You had to work through your insecurities and traumas first. There was a lot of your history that needed to be let go. You needed to go through really ugly times in your past to find some perspective. Forgive yourself, putting yourself first, understanding yourself. You just worked on knowing you and becoming the person you always wanted. 

And you grew and changed so much. You felt proud of yourself. You started writing again. Creating was the best way to mourn your relationship with Oscar alongside your old self that left him. To mourn that part of you that is gone forever. Creating was what kept you sane all this time. What brought you back to life. You wrote so many songs about him. Blaming you, blaming him. Blaming the universe for not putting it easier on you. 

So music, once again, saved your life. 

Oscar’s life changed drastically. Not only by the fact he didn't have you anymore on the paddock to cheer him on, but also he didn't have you in his apartment to share his life with. He missed you everyday he woke up to an empty bed. Mourning what you had changed him forever. He blamed himself for not knowing how to get to you, how to understand you and be able to help you through it. So he started reading about psychology to learn how to understand people better. He wanted to improve his emotional intelligence. He knew that maybe you wouldn't be there anymore, probably forever, but at least he could be better to the people around him. 

He didn't date anyone. His way of mourning was trying not to think about it occupying his space and time with work and training and racing and reading. He couldn't do anything else.  

He always found himself not being able to think, wondering where you were and especially how you were. After that night, you went to cero contact. And he knew it was the best, but he couldn't get you out of his head yet. He felt guilty knowing that he can understand your needs better when it's a little too late. He just wished to press rewind and do it again but the right way this time. He knew it was impossible and that dug a hole in his heart. He knew that it would be there forever. You were the love of his life. He really thought he couldn't love anyone that way, ever again. You were a force of nature for him. Blowing him away every single time. 

You never went back to races. He knew how much you adored the sport and how in another life you would have loved to be an engineer. You dreamed of one day to see a woman on the podium. You actually sponsored two girls from F1 Academy. The boys didn't see you again either. Actually he knew you did see lando a few times because you two became really close during your relationship, but lando always lied and told him that he didn't see you. He knew Lando was trying to be a good friend. He even tried to introduce Oscar to some girls but it never worked. He tried though. But he found himself thinking that he was kissing it was you. It was heartbreaking to see. He was kind of stuck on you. 

So he decided he would take his time to grow and figure out who he was by himself. Find comfort in his own company. Doing dates  by himself. He found it cringe to call it that way but his therapist insisted on calling it that way so he could deprogram himself from you and anything and everything related to you. 

He was proud of himself though. He was doing alright again, actually enjoying his job, his friends, and his own company. He even won races, he did podiums and everything he dreamed of. But still, he hoped you didn't feel like you needed to leave to let him shine. He wished you were there every time to hug you and shower you in  champagne. 

He really missed you in his life. 

Too far gone, don’t know where we started ── .✦

So here you were more than a year later at the Azerbaijan GP 2024. The Mercedes team invited you as a star guest so you came with your friend because alone you would have died. Actually, before coming to the paddock you had an anxiety attack and if it wasn't for your friend who made sure you felt safe and okay to go, you would’ve been on a plane back home. It was the first time since you broke up with Oscar you felt okay enough to be able to go through it. You were invited by different teams at least 15 times now. But you always lied and said you couldn't make it. You just needed to stay at home or the studio writing as far as possible from oscar and anything related to him. But you went through all of that with your therapist and she said that if you liked the sport and you really enjoyed races or anything related to it, you shouldn't let Oscar or the thought of him or what happened, deprive you of it. 

It was sunday, you preferred not to come on friday or saturday just because there were more possibilities you would bump into him. And you just weren't ready to see him. The race was insane so far. Actually, Oscar was doing more than okay. Your heart was pounding, you could hear it loud and clear. Your best friend held your hand all the time in that garage so you don't forget she’s there for you. And that you’re okay.  You knew you shouldn't be afraid of him because he was an angel. But you were scared of yourself and how would you handle that situation. You came to terms that actually, everything that happened between him and you, it was that your insecurities just made everything so toxic that he couldn't handle it all. It didn't feel good when you realised that but it is what it is. You didn't know better and forgiving yourself for that was the hardest part of the process. 

You squeezed your best friend's hand, it was the last lap. Your heart is almost out of your body. You are wearing an old Oscar hoodie. You really liked it, plus you came here looking like shit in your opinion. You didn't even brush your hair nor that you needed it like before, now your hair is super short. Everyone in the garage was watching closely and before you could actually process what you ‘ve just seen. Your friends shouted “omg” in unison not believing what they saw.

Destiny had its twisted ways to be honest. Osca won the race. he won. You were just shocked. 

You were here and he won, like, what are the chances of that to happen actually? First race you’re back and he wins. and in that way. Your friends hugged you. 

“Holy shit that 's really insane shit” Nikola said, watching the screens at the garage. 

“We need to go guys, i don't wanna see him, please” you didn't know why you started to panic like that. Sonny looked at Nikola and just got you out of there. 

At the Mercedes hospitality you felt safe while the celebrations were held. There was no reason or chance Oscar walked into the Mercedes building, right?  You were drinking some coffee with you girls trying to focus on the conversation about any other driver but Oscar, just around strategy and stuff. You were trying really hard but you couldn't stop thinking about the fact that maybe he could come into you any time. Now that you see destiny hates you. 

“y/N, you okay bestie?”Sonny tried to get you out of your drawing though by touching your arm so she could catch your attention back to reality. 

“Oh yeah, I was just thinking,” you said, adjusting yourself on the chair. Nikola looked worried. 

“y/n, we can go if you need to. We don't want you to feel uncomfortable, okay? Just tell us” she said, comprehensively describing the situation and her friend's feelings. You licked your dry lips.

Before you could answer her someone interrupted you. 

“y/, is it you?” that. Fucking. Voice. Your friends’ eyes widen as surprised as you were. You turned to the voice to find, in fact, your ex boyfriend watching you so confused. You were speechless for a moment. He looked so pretty and sweaty. His eyes are shining brighter than ever you have seen. 

“Oh, hi oscar. Yeah, it’s me” you tried to play it cool but to be fair, you felt the butterflies on your stomach just like the first time you met him at that  birthday party you didn't want to go to. But luckilyyou did. Destiny is always playing dirty for you. Or geniously. You didn't know anymore. He smiled widely.

“Oh, wow, hi, yeah. I didn't know you were coming” he said nervously. Your friends looked at each other noticing. 

“I was invited by George, actually. I almost didn't come tho. How crazy, you win right? You did an amazing race. "You were surprised that you could even have a proper conversation with him while your heart was hurting out of anxiety, nervousness and butterflies were everywhere. 

Oscar Felt his chest tighter. His stomach was happy to see you, he knew. “Thank you,” he said sweetly. You looked so pretty under the light of the Mercedes building. You were his hoodie, your favorite, but he didn't know if it was appropriate to mention it. Your hair was so short and looked so beautiful on you. It actually made you look prettier. Your face was the face of an angel, he always thought that. But with that haircut it only intensified your perfection. He felt stupid. Just like the first time he saw you at that party he wasn't even invited directly. Destiny always played on his favour with you, until that night. He didn't even want to remember it. You looked so different yet you felt the same. Your perfume was the same, he knew. It’s the one he gifted you on your 6 month anniversary. You used to celebrate each month. 

An awkward silence makes its presence between you two, not knowing what else to say or comment. 

“Congrats oscar on the win” sonny tried to save you from misery right there capturing oscar’s attention. He smiled gently, thanking her and nikola. He recognized them and gave them a hug. He seemed happy to see them. You smiled remembering your nights playing uno and drinking wine and baking canela rolls when winter break came around. You Missed him more than you’ve ever thought you would. And something inside you just felt exactly the same you always felt with him. He altered the chemistry in your brain so easily it was kind of scary. 

“Hey osc! Zac wants to talk to you! What are you doing here?” Lando Norris came into the building as well. He was your friend when he saw who Oscar was, he grinned. “Hey, bestie, whatchu doing here?” he said happily, giving you a comforting hug. He was genuinely surprised because you didn't even tell you. He suspected Oscar was here because George told him you were here. He can't keep secrets. And he knew it was George because he was sure Lewis didn't even know you. 

“George invited us,” you explained after he stepped back.

“Okay let's go, great to see you girl. Hope to see you around more often "Oscar said while looking directly at you in the last sentence to then disappear dragging Lando out of the hospitality. Your friends looked at you and you looked at them.

“I need a whole vodka bottle down my throat right now” you sentence, making you laugh. But you didn't. You felt scared of what you felt a few moments ago. 

(...)

New year is here. You were invited along with your friends by lando to his beginning of the year party here in Monaco. And oh you knew Oscar was gonna be there. Of course, he is one of his closest friends also.

This time you felt more calm and collected around the fact you were going to see him again. I think being drunk was the thing you were thanked for. If something felt rare,you would drink straight vodka or tequila and the problem was solved. You didn’t even have to think about it. 

Your friend helped choose the sexiest dress for you. It was a satin white little dress with broderie endings. Pretty subtle but at the same time suggesting. Just how you were. Angel face, dirty minded. Problem was you couldn't date people because of the Oscars. Because since you saw him those seconds in Azerbaijan, you couldn't stop seeing his shiny eyes and beautiful smile every time you close your eyes. You didn't interact all of this time, you didn't even follow each other on social media. 

Mystery drove you I guess. And who could blame you? It was Oscar Piastri, the one you had to forget. But I just couldn't. You missed his touch, his breath, his voice, his lips. 

Your friend took you out of your thoughts telling you they needed to go to the bathroom. You Followed them around the party up to the toilets. They got in but you decided to wait outside because the music was just so good you wanted to enjoy it. You always wished you could write a party song but it isn't your thing at all. Nor you didn't have the personality for it. You were too deep of a person. You needed to cut deep. Be someone to suffer along with. Or at least that’s how you perceive yourself as an artist. 

“y/N?” not that voice again. That damn voice. Though this time you were waiting for it. You looked up to find a drunk Oscar in front of you. You were breathless for a moment. How can a man become so much hotter in just a year? You smiled at him feeling your strawberry lip gloss. 

“Hoy, osc. What’s up?” you said easily. The alcohol made it easier actually. When he smiled you almost died. You Adored his smile since that party you didn't even want to go to. You thought you fell in love with him just right there. Just right here…?

“I was looking for Danny, have you seen him?” he said normally, ignoring his heart, almost skipping a beat when he saw you in that short white dress. He hoped not to be drooling in your face. Since he saw you again, he couldn't get you out of his head. You were everyday hunting him. He wanted to text you but he wasn't sure if he should. You seem so happy now, he didn't want to ruin it. He convinced himself that probably the best for you was staying away from him as much as possible. At the end of the day, he was the reason you hurt, right? Or he wanted to believe that. 

For a moment you watched his lips talking to you. His drunk voice always turned you on. But you couldn't show it. Not anymore. You looked back at his eyes. Half smile on your face while shaking your head “no, i didn't. Iwas waiting for my friends that are in the bathroom” you explained and he nodded. 

“Well, I'll keep looking then. See you around” he told you to go back into the crowd to look for his friends. Hesaw the way you looked at his lips. He had to be the stronger one. It was better this way. As much as he wanted to eat you out right there and then.

He hurt you. He didn't understand you. He didn't deserve you. He made sure to protect you from himself. Even though all he wanted was to be with you. 

the announcement ── .✦

yourusername made a post

liked by sabrinacarpenter, landonorris, georgerussel and 987,677 others

yourusername: finally, i'm so hyped i can tell you that my new ep "almost said i miss you" will be yours on february 14 🥹 left my heart on these songs and i'm so excited for you to hear them! Love you sm. Thank u for all of the support. Ur my angels <3

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user56: OMG THIS THE BEST IM SO HYPED QUEEN I MISSED YOU

oscarstan: the song titles 😭😭😭😭😭😭

y/nstan: let's pretend we don't know for who these are to

landonorris: cant wait for people to cry their eyes out just like i did :'( *liked by yourusername*

↳ georgerussel: i know someone

↳ georgerussel: @/oscarpiastri

↳ alexalbon: you can't live without drama, don't you?

↳ georgerussel: not drama mate, i'm making things work here

hattiepiastri: so excited girl !!!!!

↳ user674: NOT HIS SISTER HI GIRL

↳ user89: let's not make assumptions, maybe they remained friends

↳ user45: i try not to be delusional but this doesnt make it easier

danielricciardo: congrats princess! I already know you 'll kill it! Miss you *liked by yourusername*

sabrinacarpenter: never fail to make me cry for hours. I love you, ur the best in this world *liked by yourusername and oscarpiatri*

↳ user90: OMG HE LIKED HE LIKED WHAT IS GOING ON

↳ user12: AAAAAAAAAA

↳ georgerussel: you're welcome guys :)

taylorswift: and artist of the year goes to.... *liked by yourusername*

The aftermath - february 14 ── .✦

Oscar was back to the UK training for the beginning of the new season. It was the coldest winter he experienced. He got back home from mclaren hq. He took a hot shower to warm himself. His apartment was silent. It felt empty for the first time. Like something was missing. He went straight into bed. He wasn't that hungry anyway, but he was tired indeed. 

“Hey, listen to it. I think you need to” 

He saw his sister Hattie's notification pop up on his screen confusing him abit. He went into the messages app and opened his sister’s. When he did he understood what she was talking about. A knot on this throat formed. It was y/n's ep. Guess he now understood taylor swift’s exes. It’s hard to date a musician ust because of the aftermath of the relationship. 

“Just do it. You will understand why once you did” 

Another message popped up on this screen and sighed heavily. Probably his sister was right but at the same time he was scaredas fuck. He opened it on spotify, she looked as pretty as ever on the cover of it. ‘Almost said I miss you’ - that was the title and only had 3 songs. By the names of them he suspected it was about him but he tried to believe they weren't even though his sister already told him that they were. He decided to listen to it in order.

He took his headphones from his nightstand so he could hear your voice clearly. All over his head. Cutting deep into his fiber. 

The first piano tiles started playing and his heart was already sinking. Hearing her voice so raw and close and clear sent shivers down his spine. He heard every single word you said. It described perfectly that horrible and forgettable night you broke up. Hearing your voice crack broke his heart into a million pieces. It wasn't even half of the song when he started crying. He knew what he said under his breath that sent you both straight into hell. He felt so guilty about everything. He really just wished to talk to you. 

When he started to hear the second song he knew it was about that race you went. He hoped to see you in the next one, and the next one. But you didn't go again. The lyrics were so real his skin felt every word. 

When he heard you saying that you felt sorry his tears streamed down his face more violently. He didn't recognize this person. But you always had this effect on him. With you he was a feeler, one that felt way too deeply. Unlike the person he shows to people. You always knew the real him. He couldn't lie to you. Even though you thought he would cheat on  you. He would never. Hearing you wanting to hold him broke his heart. Why did you both have to do this the hard way? Why didn't you just be happy with each other? He really missed you. He missed everything about you. Your presence around him. He was his best version with you. Now he feels like a ghost of who he used to be. 

The last song just ended him. 

‘Do you remember being happy together? I do, don't you? Then all of the sudden, you’re sick to your stomach. Is that still true?’ he whipped his tears the best he could. 

He never called you or told you he missed you. But he guessed you would have liked it like that. 

‘everything i know brings me back to us. Everywhere I go leads me back to you’ he felt the same. 

He didn't know what to do. He had a battle inside him. He promised himself he would stay away from you so you could be happy just like you deserved. But at the same time he wanted to be happy and he knew you made him happy. He was happy with you. 

“So? Call her please oscar. You both deserve to be happy and figure things out along the way, together”

Hattie read his mind. Her text just in time when he is back into the silent apartment. The empty and cold apartment that once was full of laughter and music because you were with him. He missed you so much. He missed hearing you play guitar rumbling words then writing them down. Your hugs when he was back home, your cuddles in bed when he was sad, your perspective on things. He missed every detail about you.

But was he ready to come back to you?

[sleepyparalysisdmon]

Enhypen and their 'oh' moment

Requested? Yes! Request: ‘so happy you’re willing to write for other groups 💞 my request is enhypen members falling in love / realizing they’re falling in love’

Jungwon Like most group leaders, he carries a lot on his shoulders. He probably feels that he can’t share that responsibility with anyone else from time to time. Still, he finds himself opening up about his stresses one night and he lets you comfort him. He likes to be strong for everyone else and wants to appear unaffected, but he feels safe appearing affected in front of you because you’re so gentle about it. It’s when he’s got his head in your lap after he unloads all his worries that he has his little ‘oh’ moment.

Heesung He might come off as reserved and even a little bit cold at first (someone please prove me wrong though!!). You might even think he doesn’t like you very much because he’s perhaps not as outwardly expressive as others. But trust that he has a soft spot for you. He might not let some of the younger members get away with something, but you can right in front of him and he’ll never say a word. If one of the younger members throws a fit about this preferential treatment, he’ll blink a few times and think, ‘huh. That’s weird.’ Largely unaffected by this revelation though.

Jay I think he’d be one of those that knows pretty early on that he’s falling. Within the first few times he meets you, he recognizes what’s happening in slow motion, so there’s no big ‘oh’ moment. Just a series of little confirmations along the way that his assumption was correct. You do the slightest, most monotonous thing and he thinks. ‘Yep, I think I’m in love.’ It’s not this big, scary feeling like some of the other members might experience, but rather a comforting feeling to fall.

Jake Now he might be shocked. Say you aren’t even dating but you share some mutual friends. He sees you playing with Layla in the other room and one of his group members calls him out for his staring, and maybe even calls him ‘lovesick’. Totally flabbergasted because what do you mean?? It’s not like that?? His group members’ faces tell him everything he needs to know - which is that he’s a blind idiot (affectionate).

Sunghoon Ok, he realizes because he’s jealous. Regardless of whether you are dating or not, he’ll see someone get way too close to you, or hear someone talk about how they’re going to ask you out, and he’s panicking!! Cannot determine right away why he’s panicking because he’d like to think he’s not a very possessive person. But here we are. The ‘oh’ moment is when he realizes he perked up as soon as your attention was back on him. Might just confess in a roundabout way right then, like, “don’t pay attention to anyone else, okay? Only me!” A big baby.

Sunoo lol he says he hates annoying things. Then lets you annoy him continuously. Doesn’t say a word when you poke his cheek or boop his nose. Doesn’t complain when you keep him up with your yapping in the middle of the night. Doesn’t think the first thing of bailing on any other plans because you’re bored. This will be a super slow realization, but when it finally does hit him, it’s because HE said he missed you and you laugh and say, “but we’re constantly together!” ‘Oh’ indeed.

Niki To no one’s surprise, Niki has maknae privileges and totally milks it for all it’s worth. He’s totally fine with being babied by his members. He’s used to being protected, but feels rather protective of you. Might even speak up to his hyungs if they mess with you too much, to which they’ll tease him about. Thing is, he might start swinging on them if they don’t stop!! The thought that it’s anymore than friends doesn’t compute for him until it’s spelled out for him by one of his group members, probably in a sarcastic way - like, “Fine, fine, we’ll stop messing with your girl.” Never occurred to him that you could be his until that moment.

[fanfictionstuff]

Amaimon X Student 12

So, i'm mostly done writing the Amaimon x Exorcist chapter 3 but this idea came to me and I couldn't let it go. 🫢

When Shiemi assures you, that yes, Rin deleted the photo, she is sure of it. You open your photo app once again. “Wait, it’s actually cute.” You comment, gazing at the photo. “Okay, it’s really cute.” You grin. 

Izumo scoffs. “It’s gross _____.

Paku leans closer to you to get another look. “It is kind of cute.”

“Right?” You grin. 

Izumo glares at the two of you. “It’s not cute at all, and you would think differently if you saw what we saw on the camping trip.” She tells Paku.

You huff, “I was on the camping trip; it’s cute.”

“And clearly, you’ve got a screw loose.” You pout at her words but don’t argue against it. 

After the four of you finish, you go your separate ways. Shiemi and you head to your apartment while Paku and Izumo head in different directions. The walk to your apartment is quiet, and Shiemi seems really nervous throughout. Once you arrive, you gently nudge her inside, “Okay, tell me what’s wrong.”

“I’m sorry! I shouldn’t have said anything, I just didn’t realize you didn’t know, and I said it in front of other people.” She looks like she’s going to start crying, so you quickly wrap your arms around her. “No, no. Shiemi, it’s okay. Izumo and Paku are some of our closest friends, right? It’s okay. I’m just glad you told me.” She nods against your shoulder as she hugs you back. 

“…._____?” 

“Yeah?” 

“You didn’t really put his…thing…in your mouth, right?” 

“….” 

----------------------------------------------------

Amaimon cautiously steps into Mephisto’s office. The king of time had sounded odd over the phone when he requested that Amaimon come for a brief chat. 

“Oh, I'm glad you’re here. Please, take a seat and enjoy some tea. We need to have a brief chat about Miss ____.” He gestures to the chair opposite his desk as he speaks to Amaimon. Said demon glances at the chair and then back at Mephisto before calmly sitting down.

“Tell me, what do you know about Miss _____?” 

“…” 

Mephisto nodded. “I suspected as much. She comes from a long line of exorcists, a lineage typically marked by great power. For centuries, they have served the order tirelessly.” He observed Amaimon cautiously, and as expected, there was no sign of reaction. “Unfortunately, many of them were wiped out during the Blue Night, particularly the younger generation. Miss ______ is the last one left to carry on the bloodline unless her parents have another child, though honestly, that seems unlikely.” Still, Amaimon remained unfazed. “Her parents are exceptionally strict; I’m unsure how she managed to convince them to let her stay at True Cross to graduate. Regardless, since she’s the last of her bloodline and her family is so demanding, they are already searching for suitors for her. They want her to marry and start a family soon after graduation. I’ve heard she has developed a bit of a crush on you.” Once more, there was no response from Amaimon. “Stay away from _____; I had thought you were merely trying to provoke Rin. I wasn’t aware you had become intimate with her.” 

Amaimon opens his mouth, looking for a moment like he might argue with Mephisto, but then he nods. “Okay.”

Mephisto raises a brow, surprised Amaimon agreed so quickly. I suppose he’s not as interested in her as he made it seem to Rin; good, it’s less of a headache for me. “You may leave.” 

As Amaimon leaves Mephisto’s office, thoughts of you and another man begin to fester in his mind, fueling his anger with each step. No other man should be able to kiss you, hold you, or be intimate with you. No other man should ever hear the sounds you make; or have the privilege of tasting you, and no other man should know what it feels like to have your mouth around their cock. You belong to Amaimon. You’re his pet.

His anger quickly escalates into rage as he heads to your apartment without hesitation.

You jump when there is a loud knock on your door; confused, you pull away from Shiemi. “Coming.” You’re surprised to see Amaimon standing in the doorway when you open it, but what’s more surprising is the emotions on his face; the normally unbothered demon king is now furious. Almost on the same level as you saw the night he attacked Rin on the camping trip. “Uh, come in?” Despite your common sense telling you otherwise, you step away and welcome the demon into your home. He steps into the house and quickly heads to your bedroom. Where he’s aware you keep documents. “Shiemi, you should leave.” 

“But-“

“It’s okay. Look, if I don’t text you within an hour, feel free to call someone to check on me, alright? I promise I’ll be fine.” It’s not a promise you should be making, but you’re eager to find out what’s bothering Amaimon. You can hear him going through various drawers in your bedroom. “Actually, I’ll call you since someone tends to text from my phone. So, if I call you, you can be sure it’s really me, right?” Gradually, she nods, allowing you to guide the blonde out of your apartment. 

As you enter your bedroom, you find Amaimon sitting on the edge of the bed, casually flipping through a stack of documents. It’s evident he has uncovered what he was looking for. A frown crosses your face as you move closer, slowly realizing what he has discovered. “Did Mephisto tell you? I haven’t even shared it with Shiemi or Rin, and they’re two of my closest friends.” You let out a sigh; it’s a topic you prefer to ignore, preferring to live in a world where this isn’t your reality. It’s easy to pretend until another file arrives in your mail every few weeks. 

“My parents didn’t have a choice; they were matched up and told that if they didn’t like it, too bad – they needed to have a child. Fortunately, they fell in love, which is quite rare in my family. However, having witnessed what their own parents and other family members endured emotionally, they didn’t want to put me through that. They’re offering me a choice among the potential suitors they’re finding. I can even go on dates with them before making my final decision. There are a couple that my grandparents have selected.” You pick up a file from the bed and show him a photo of a gross-looking man twenty years older than you. “Luckily, my parents are trying to find me someone I’ll at least be attracted to; as you can see, my grandparents couldn’t care less if I’m attracted to them or not.” You toss the file in the trash can beside your bed. “Why did Mephisto tell you?” 

“Rin Okumura showed Big Brother the photo I sent him. He told me I need to stop bothering you, and why.”

“Oh.” 

Amaimon carelessly tosses the files from his hands onto the floor. “I don’t like to share,” he declares, stepping on a few of the fallen papers as he exits, slamming the front door behind him.

You sigh, bending down to pick up the strewn documents. “I guess that’s the end of that. I was hoping to live in my fantasy a bit longer.” You had been trying to ignore all the files, but now you realize it’s time you have to accept it. Carefully, you start to scan through the documents and photos. Most of them end up in the trash, as you discard them without bothering to read beyond their names and ages. You had initially set aside a couple of options to discuss with your parents, but now they’ve become mixed up with all the others. Upon revisiting them, you find yourself less interested. How can you be interested after experiencing perfection?   “No. Stop _____. It’s time to grow up. They want me to be at least engaged within a year of graduating.” 

Unlocking your phone, you take a photo of the files you had originally been slightly interested in discussing with your parents. 

Hey, Mom, I’ve been thinking about picking a husband. What do you think of these three?

After sending the text, you give Shiemi a quick call to reassure her that you’re okay and not to worry. You rush to end the call and toss the phone across the room. Your eyes flicker to the files you’ve selected once again. “I hate this.” you groan, hurling them across the room as well.

------------------------------------------------------------

Your mother doesn’t reply until the next day, and it’s a call instead of a text. When you receive the call, you’re sitting with your friends for lunch. 

“Hey, sweetheart, how are you?” 

You lean against Shiemi as you answer. You really don’t want to talk about your potential future husband now, and you haven’t even told your friends yet. “Fine, I’m just having lunch. What’s up?” 

“Oh, I’m calling regarding the message you sent. I’m pleased to hear that you’re finally considering it, but I have some unfortunate news.” Her voice carries a hint of detachment. “It’s about Hano-san.” She pauses, letting out a sigh. “Sadly, he passed away last night.”

You straighten, having trouble processing her words. “Huh?” 

“Yes, it was a demon attack, but there aren’t any details. Nobody knows what demon it was; the only signs it was a demon were that he was found with his weapons drawn.”

Oh fuck. 

[leonardalphachurch]

sometimes i remember that most north fans don’t write him as an absolute insane person ethical manipulative girlfriend style and i’m like. what is he even then… just a pleasant white man? you know what. more power to you if you need a pleasant white man for a blorbo but god that could not be me

[puppyeared]

footnotes arent enough I need you to talk to me like im fucking Amelia Bedelia

[dashiellqvverty]

calling myself a former rpf fan is so misleading bc “fiction” had nothing to do with it. even when i did read fic i was never even all that into it and i didn’t really get much out of it it was ALL about reading those primers and manifestos and analyzing lyrics and watching videos/interviews/etc

[angelthingy]

(this was written AFTER writing the tags, so reading those first might make more sense!)

wrote this on another post somewhere but since i ended up writing an essay in the tags forgetting to mention it i felt i should add that in now

as much as i think it’s important to have empathy to any side in queer discourse, the important thing to me is that the word discourse itself implies that there’s a debate

sometimes. there is not a debate

sometimes. they are just wrong

people saying “aro people aren’t queer” is NOT a debate, they’re just wrong. aro people are queer go away

people excluding trans people from communities isn’t a debate, they’re just wrong and possibly terfs/radfems!

just wanted to clear that up because i generally get kinda anxious whenever i talk extensively about a topic because!! i am not the best at using words to describe my thoughts!! because my thoughts often dont happen in words and instead in concepts which is a lot harder to explain!!!!

all queer discourse could be stopped if we all just remembered that in the eyes of conservative fascists we're all dirty queers polluting their kids minds who need to be eradicated at all costs

[sparrow-and-seed-scrawls]

How to Write Strong Dialogue

(from a writer of ten years)

So you’re back in the writing trenches. You’re staring at your computer, or your phone, or your tablet, or your journal, and trying not to lose your mind. Because what comes after the first quotation mark? Nothing feels good.

Don’t worry, friend. I’m your friendly tumblr writing guide and I’m here to help you climb out of the pit of writing despair.

I’ve created a character specifically for this exercise. His name is Amos Alejandro III, but for now we’ll just call him Amos. He’s a thirty-something construction worker with a cat who hates him, and he’s just found out he has to go on a quest across the world to save his mother’s diner.

1.) Consider the Attitude and Characteristics of Your Character

One of the biggest struggles writers face when writing dialogue is keeping characters’ dialogue “in-character”.

You’re probably thinking, “but Sparrow, I’m the creator! None of the dialogue I write can be out of character because they’re my original characters!”

WRONG. (I’m hitting the very loud ‘incorrect’ buzzer in your head right now).

Yes, you created your characters. But you created them with specific characteristics and attitudes. For example, Amos lives alone, doesn’t enjoy talking too much, and isn’t a very scholarly person. So he’s probably not going to say something like “I suggest that we pursue the path of least resistance for this upcoming quest.” He’d most likely say, “I mean, I think the easiest route is pretty self-explanatory.”

Another example is a six-year-old girl saying, “Hi, Mr. Ice Cream Man, do you have chocolate sundaes?” instead of “Hewwo, Ice Cweam Man— Chocowate Sundaes?”

Please don’t put ‘w’s in the middle of your dialogue unless you have a very good and very specific reason. I will cry.

Yes, the girl is young, but she’s not going to talk like that. Most children know how to ask questions correctly, and the ‘w’ sound, while sometimes found in a young child’s speech, does not need to be written out. Children are human.

So, consider the attitude, characteristics, and age of your character when writing dialogue!

2.) Break Up Dialogue Length

If I’m reading a novel and I see an entire page of dialogue without any breaks, I’m sobbing. You’re not a 17th century author with endless punctuation. You’re in the 21st century and people don’t read in the same way they used to.

Break up your dialogue. Use long sentences. Use one word. Use commas, use paragraph breaks. Show a character throwing a chair out a window in between sentences.

For example:

“So, you’re telling me the only way to save my Ma’s diner is to travel across five different continents, find the only remaining secret receipt card, and bring it back before she goes out of business? She didn’t have any other copies? Do I have to leave my cat behind?”

vs.

Amos ran a hand over his face. “So, you’re telling me the only way to save my Ma’s diner is to travel across five different continents, find the only remaining secret recipe card, and bring it back before she goes out of business?”

He couldn’t believe his luck. That was sarcastic, of course. This was ironically horrible.

“She didn’t have any other copies?” He leaned forward over the table and frowned. “Do I have to leave my cat behind?”

The second version is easier to digest, and I got to add some fun description of thought and action into the scene! Readers get a taste of Amos’ character in the second scene, whereas in the first scene they only got what felt like a million words of dialogue.

3.) Don’t Overuse Dialogue Tags.

DON’T OVERUSE DIALOGUE TAGS. DON’T. DON’T DON’T DON’T.

If you don’t know what a dialogue tag is, it’s a word after a sentence of dialogue that attributes that dialogue to a specific character.

For example:

“Orange juice and chicken ramen are good,” he said.

‘Said’ functions as the dialogue tag in this sentence.

Dialogue tags are good. You don’t want to completely avoid them. (I used to pride myself on how I could write stories without any dialogue tags. Don’t do that.) Readers need to know who’s speaking. But overusing them, or overusing weird or unique tags, should be avoided.

Examples:

“I’m gonna have to close my diner,” Amos’ mother said.

“Why?” Amos growled. “It’s been in the family forever.”

“I’ve lost the secret recipe card, and I can’t keep the diner open without it!” she cried.

“The Bacon Burger Extreme recipe card?” Amos questioned.

“Yes!” Amos’ mother screamed.

“Well, that’s not good,” Amos complained.

vs.

“I’m gonna have to close my diner,” Amos’ mother said, taking her son’s hand and leading him over to one of the old, grease-stained tabletops with the ripped-fabric booths.

Amos simply stared at her as they moved. “Why? It’s been in the family forever.”

“I’ve—” she looked away for a moment, then took in a breath. “I’ve lost the secret recipe card. And I can’t keep the diner open without it.”

“The Bacon Burger Extreme recipe card?”

“Yes!” She still wouldn’t meet his eyes, and her shoulders were shaking. “Yes.”

Amos sat down heavily in the booth. “Well, that’s not good.”

The first scene only gives character names and dialogue tags. There are no actions and no descriptions. The second scene, however, gives these things. It gives the reader descriptions of the diner, the characters’ actions, and attitudes. Overusing dialogue tags gets boring fast, so add interest into your writing!

So! When you’re writing, consider the attitude of your character, vary dialogue length, and don’t overuse dialogue tags.

Now climb out of the pit of writing despair. Pick up your pen or computer. And write some good dialogue!

Best,

Sparrow