#and trauma is fucking hard as hell to get rid of

[craftykittyscientist]

i’m so fucking tired. looking at the people i used to know and they way they’re just assholes. all of them, i’m so tired of seeing him in the hallways during school. i’m tired of remembering what his house looks like or things we did. i’m so tired of people.

[pepprs]

genuinely so angry and scared im shaking. how many other times this week this month this year have i been exposed without knowing it. do people even tell each other anymore. it’s just so grim. it’s so fucking grim

[shadow4-1]

I'm just imagining Ghost telling you that he'll kill anyone you decide to sleep with that isn't him. And, of course, when Soap finds out he's got a bit of a death wish.

Like, you and Simon are just friends with benefits. He drops by your place whenever he gets a leave and that's it. No strings attached. Just something quick to fill the time. At least, that's the way it'd always been.

"If you fuck anyone else m' a kill 'im."

It's hard to take him seriously when he's got you face down on floor with your ass up in the air. You groan and try to push your hips back against him. He grabs you by the scruff of your neck and cranes your head back. You whine at the discomfort but he doesn't stop. He mutters the threat into your ear again before finally letting you go.

You cum harder than you'd like to admit. But when you finally come back down to Earth, you start to wonder. You try to ask him about it but he says nothing. Whatever this is - it's supposed to be no strings attached. You're allowed to see other people. You're allowed to fuck other people.

But you've never known Simon to be anything other than a man of his word. His threat is more than likely serious. You don't know much about his background other than he's military and that he's sustained heavy trauma over the years. So, you find that you don't really want to try him.

It's easy for awhile. Simon always leaves you satiated. But, as weeks turn into months you start to feel your skin crawl. You would've already called up your other friends with benefits by now. Instead, you'd blocked them all that first week he'd left.

You try to ignore your hunger, but it festers into a deep seated need none of your toys can rid you of. You get a call from Simon one night after a fruitless tryst with your vibrator. He sounds to be in better spirits after you whine about how much you miss him. You don't even realize how you sound until the words are already out of your mouth.

"Johnny's gonna drop by t' check in on you, love." Ghost hums contentedly. "Show 'im a good time."

He hangs up.

What does he mean by that? You'd met Johnny numerous times before. You'd flirted and enjoyed yourself in his presence but...he's Simon's best friend. Show him a good time? Does he want you to screw him? But...he said he'd kill anyone you sleep with?

You try to keep your resolve when Johnny drops by later that evening. He's his usual charming self - touchy and too comfortable. You voice to him your unease, but he brushes it off with more shameless flirting over your homemade dinner. After dinner, he practically throws you up onto the kitchen table. You kick and push at his chest with outstretched arms. Whatever this is can't happen.

"No! Johnny, he'll kill you." You squawk, pushing at his jaw, trying to keep his lips off of you.

"He wouldn't dare!" He laughs as he forces off your panties with impatient hands.

He flips you over on your stomach, forces your shirt and bra off. He humps desperately against you, slipping his cock out of his jeans. He smells of sweat and musk - as if he'd run straight to your flat after receiving Simon's call.

"Johnny, please." You try to reason with him. "I don't want you getting hurt."

"Hurt? Simon'd never hurt me, love." He hums, tweaking one of your nipples with one hand while he eases open your folds with the other.

"He loves me just as much as he loves you! Besides-"

Johnny laps a long stripe from your collarbone, up across your neck and chin, before stopping to press a firm kiss directly to your lips. You shy away at first, but it isn't but a moment longer before you melt into him. It's been so long...and Johnny is willing to take the risk.

"If he did try to kill me it'd sure be one hell of a fight." He smirks, pressing himself deep inside of you. You whine, tears pricking in your eyes as he practically splits you open with how thick he really is.

"I think I could take 'im nowadays. Aye know all his secrets!"

[biolums]

typed out a wholepost about how i constantly crave attention ornevencjust That Person. drafted it because i said waymore thwn i want people to see (i am haha unstable on here. buti dont want to. like. i dont want you guys seeing me just. unstable). stood up. realized imwearing my exes shirt. and now im doing even worse. so. haha feeing kind of unstable here

[monty-glasses-roxy]

@jellycreamjammedart

(Responding to your reblogs here for the read more I added, so as to save everyone from a three mile long post)

Ohhh you're so right. The scenario where Cassie goes after Freddy to get revenge on Gregory, actually puts Freddy in the same situation the others were in. If any of the other animatronics knew what Cassie was planning, they could have stopped her and saved Freddy from that fate, but they chose not to. In getting revenge on Gregory, she unintentionally or not, gave Freddy a taste of his own medicine, just without the part where she steals his parts and makes him live without... Though I'm sure if he still has Roxy's eyes, she could do that too.

Ooooo I like your additions to my lil scenario!

Honestly, if Cassie is in bad shape after dealing with Mimic and escaping, then Roxy and Cassie's dad are probably in too much of a rush to get her to safety to sit around and explain everything. However, if he was around at the time of the Raceway construction staff going and dying to Mimic, possibly even a technician that was part of that team and either made it out alive, or was meant to manage things in the Raceway while they were gone, not much would need to be said. If that's the case, then all Roxy really needs to tell him when he gets there is "Mimic is dead" and he could probably fill in the gaps for what that has to do with Cassie.

Though he's not psychic, so she'd probably say Mimic tricked her and they managed to kill it. The smaller details would have to wait as Roxy would have to relay what she knows about the injuries from the Minis to him so that he has as much information as he needs to tell the A&E team at the hospital. This is only if he knows though. If he doesn't, well, an old Fazbear murderbot lured her down there and Roxy got her out, that's the most he's getting until Cassie's in a better state to explain it all to him. Who dropped the lift is just not immediately important, just that it fell with her inside, ya know?

(More under the cut)

Honestly, it'd take some time for Vanessa to contact Cassie's dad I think. It's not like Roxy would know what hospital they went to and there's privacy laws to stop her from just showing up if they don't know her or want her to. Cassie might want to see her if Roxy talked about her enough, but I think generaly speaking, Vanessa is gonna have to either break into Fazbear records or get Roxy to hand over his contacts. In the case of the latter, Roxy would probably just be confused. It's been like a week, Cassie's probably told him all of that by now? And also no she can't have his contacts. She won't risk Gregory getting a hold of them after what he did. No way in hell is she doing that!

All this to say, Vanessa is probably only going to get a chance to talk to him if he brings Cassie back to see Roxy and the Minis. I feel like at the very least, Cassie would manage to convince him to go back and update them on her condition. Ya know... so Roxy and the Minis don't worry themselves into the ground thinking she might be dead. Like they were worried about Vanessa.

But in a situation where Vanessa does meet them when they're visiting Roxy for a bit? Vanessa trying so hard not to cry cause oh my god are you telling her Gregory did that to her??? She's healing, yeah, but she went up against Mimic and a falling lift, I'd say a loss of at least one limb is a given and... well she was hoping in her head it would have all just roughed her up a bit, this was not what she expected. How can she believe Gregory did this? Still, she has to talk to her dad. She has to make sure he knows everything. It's only right.

They're both so nice to her as well she feels awful for doing this. Roxy and the Minis stay with Cassie while Vanessa and Cassie's dad go and have this chat and the second he knows that Vanessa is housing Gregory is the second he stops trusting her. How can she take him in knowing what he's done?! To his daughter?! The fuck is she doing here talking to them like this?! Isn't Roxy meant to be her friend?! And she still thought it was a good idea to take him in?!

I think maybe after that initial anger, he'd just be concerned though. Like... is she okay? Is she safe? This is clearly a complicated situation on her end of things... His anger is with Gregory at this point, not her. He just maybe won't tell her anything important in case it gets passed onto him. If she ever dares to bring Gregory back here, or anywhere near Cassie, well Roxy's gonna have someone else to guard from him this time. He's not a violent man, but what the fuck okay??

From then on, he communicates with Roxy to make sure he, Cassie and Vanessa are rarely, if ever, there at the same time. You're absolutely right, he's gonna want to make sure there's distance there. He's got to be 100% sure the little rat that hurt his daughter isn't there before he lets Cassie visit Roxy again. He's taking no chances now.

Even if he knew about the whole situation from Cassie, they'd still need to have some sort of conversation. And to be honest, after this whole Vanny thing? Vanessa doesn't exactly have many other people right off the bat she can really talk to, so if nothing else, it helps her wrap her head around the absolute nightmare of a situation she's in now. This is a real shit show and with how many people get upset at just the mention of Gregory's name, it's got to be really hard to deal with that. Yeah, Roxy hasn't just stopped caring about her, and trusts her enough not to pass most things onto Gregory or Freddy, but Vanessa can hardly say anything about them to her cause it pisses her off so much she probably starts scratching at the fucking walls or something.

Horrible situation to be in on top of all of the Vanny stuff, the whole thing where apparently the animatronics actually cared enough about her to search for her after everything, and suddenly being a guardian and technically on the run for stealing a Freddy from Fazbear itself. Vanessa is really going through it now.

This was not a good outcome for that conversation, but she supposes it could have been a lot worse. How else is someone meant to react to someone telling them they're housing the kid that tried to kill their kid? Just brush it off like "kids will be kids"??? No! Absolutely not! She's so fucking sorry for everything, someone please tell her what to do now, because she has no idea. She's at a complete and utter loss

Oh sfdsfsdfs you know what would be funny? Cassie finding out Vanessa has Gregory and Freddy back home. Just turns to Roxy like, ".... wow. You're really friends with her? Are you sure?" She's not even mad. Just immediately starts squinting at Roxy's choice in friends, judging her just a little bit about it lmao. Sure, they've been through some shit, but come on, she can do better than this...

Freaking HAUNTED by the scenario of Cassie falling for the Mimic's act in the elevator and she comes back from it so, so, SO freaking scared but also so so SO freaking biased and spiteful and ANGRY she tries getting back at Gregory in the way that would hurt him even more than just 'paying in the same coin', by taking away from him exactly what he loves the most by trying to get Freddy destroyed. 💀 (definitely not a route I think Cassie would truly dive into but boy ain't it an interesting one none the less! 👀)

It also doubles as a way to free Roxy and the others from Freddy as well!! Two birds one stone!!

However... I've never heard the saying 'paying in the same coin' so I'm not entirely sure what it means, but I can take a pretty good guess. Not to be contrarian but what makes you think destroying Freddy wouldn't be doing the same thing Gregory did? He destroyed Roxy, Chica and Monty, and it was his voice telling him to deactivate Roxy for good to come and save him. After shutting her down, and her coming back to throw herself at Mimic for Cassie, Gregory tried to make it all for nothing by dropping her.

All of Roxy's damage falls on his shoulders, both before and after Cassie came into the picture. He didn't even care, did he? And neither did Freddy so really, this is the best vengeance she can hope for. She deals with the animatronic that Roxy keeps saying she'll kill if she ever sees him again, and hits Gregory where it really fucking hurts. Two revenge plans one stone!

And you're so right, Cassie would probably not go down that road... But ya know she might at least be a little tempted given Roxy's aggression over it. She keeps giving her ideas damn it she doesn't want them!!! Roxy can take them and do whatever she wants with them, Cassie doesn't wanna do it!!! And it works out cause Roxy doesn't have the fucking balls to go all the way with a murder plan anyway so no one gets hurt!!!

I guess that's a lose lose scenario ngl though...

This reminds me of a scenario I had the idea for a little bit ago when we were last talking about this stuff! (That got a bit long here so I'll add a read more for convenience)

The idea is that Vanessa, Gregory and Freddy return as quick as they can to try and save Cassie and instead find Roxy, once again guarding the door, Mini swarm in the shadows around them. She's obviously more damaged than before so it's a bit more difficult, but she's doing her best not to fall off the barriers she's stood on over the door and I've just had the idea of Minis holding onto her in the dark like training wheels. Aside from them, she's completely alone.

Vanessa talking is a shock to her and she's beyond happy to hear she's okay and most importantly, was freed. Surprisingly touched by her running to help her too... Just fucking snaps at Gregory and Freddy to shut the fuck up whenever they say anything cause she doesn't give a flying shit what they have to say. Vanessa hurries though, asking how she got away from that thing down there and tells her that Gregory's friend Cassie was down there too, what happened??

Yeah uh. Roxy says nothing for a while and Gregory gets impatient and tries to run at the door. The Minis grab him and the swarm just kinda take him away, literally up the fucking wall and take some pictures with an old Fazcam so Roxy can see it later lmao she's actually devastated she can't see this happening right now. Anyway, Roxy's like "what do you THINK happened?" and since she won't say anything else, they naturally, assume the fucking worst. She doesn't correct them or say another word. Just tells Freddy and Gregory that they've done enough fucking damage and to get out before she throws them out...

Oh yeah Gregory is fucking pissed. Why didn't she save her?! Why is Roxy out here when Cassie isn't?! What kind of useless animatronic is she that she couldn't save one kid?! What, is she only good at killing kids?! Is that it?! He's so fucking mad and Roxy just lets him rant and rave, the Minis stopping him for her every time he makes a run at the door until Freddy takes him away. He says he's disappointed in her, but that he's not surprised and that makes her seethe but she doesn't say anything until she hears Vanessa leaving. She stops her and when they're alone, she tells Vanessa the truth.

Cassie is in bad shape. Mimic is dead and they barely made it out, but her dad took her to hospital a little before they got here. Vanessa - who was in tears already - is so fucking relieved, but then asks why Roxy didn't say anything earlier. She tells her the truth as she knows it. That Cassie was here trying to save him. That Mimic lured her here as him, and at the end, Gregory said he couldn't risk being followed, and dropped the fucking lift with Cassie in it.

Now that doesn't make sense to Vanessa. She may not have been there for that last bit but they didn't rush all the way over here for nothing. Roxy can't exactly answer why he'd want to come back here, but she reminds her what he and Freddy did to all of them and points out that this would hardly have been out of the ordinary for him.

And so, you now have a situation where Vanessa doesn't know what to believe. She knows Roxy wouldn't lie about something like that and even if she did, she's a fucking awful liar. But she's clearly angry enough to let him think Cassie is dead and not give a shit... And she says it's to make sure he doesn't try it again so she's also asking Vanessa not to say a word. She can't do that! She can't just let a kid think his friend is dead because of him! ... But she's right in thinking this may not be completely out of the ordinary for him... But he wouldn't do that to someone he would run to the rescue of, right?? Gregory wouldn't do that, she knows him well enough to know that now!!

You see what's happened here? Now Vanessa is in the middle. If she doesn't say a word, Gregory will forever think Cassie got killed trying to save him. If she tells him and it turns out Roxy is right, then what if he tries again?

I feel she'd tell him, but no matter what, Roxy just straight up telling the truth to Vanessa, his current guardian, and not to him would cause so much pain. He could have been there screaming at her and she didn't say a fucking word because in her mind, this is nothing compared to what he's put all of them and Cassie through. And what happens if she does die in hospital?? What then?? She can't lie and say she's fine when she's not anyway!! She doesn't know shit!!

But ya get me with this? It's emotional revenge enacted at the end of Roxy's very long day in the pizzeria graveyard. Minimal effort required, with Vanessa unfortunately in the middle, but Vanessa is always welcome here. Roxy won't blame her for whatever she chooses to do, because at the end of the day, Roxy's done her job. Whether Gregory or Freddy believes it or not, she did her job.

She's really fucking glad she couldn't see his reaction though, she wouldn't have been able to keep her mouth shut if she had. Like most of the others, she can't bare to see a kid in genuine pain and she knows damn well how much her silence caused...

But yeah, you just got me thinking about that again. It's a spur of the moment thing for Roxy, inspired partly by the fact she's not good with words and doesn't really know how to approach this anyway. It's been a long day and her lack of words just turned into this and she's not even a little bit sorry. I think Cassie would appreciate the sentiment of keeping her safe from a second attempt on her life. And feel a bit bad that she takes some satisfaction in hearing how devastated Gregory was over it...

The picture of him being held from his ankles on the ceiling by the Minis is pretty good revenge too. They're proud of that one lmao

[tiredmamaissy]

Ralak te Sepwan ieyk’itan: Chapter Three

An Illustrated Collaboration with @zestys-stuff

Masterlist ; Rut/Heat/Knotting Info

🔞 minors, do not interact 🔞

Hyperlinks are attached to specific paragraphs that when clicked on will lead you to its illustration by Ralak's creator @zestys-stuff.

Characters: Metkayina!Ralak (24) x Sully!Omaticaya!Reader (19)

Warnings: nsfw, smut, fluff, angst, ptsd/ flashbacks, profanity, age gap, sexual tension, size difference/kink, praise kink, jealousy, scenting, fingering, recollection of non-con trauma (for the plot), alcohol consumption/drunk character, let me know if i forgot anything?

Word Count: 6.3k

Requested: Yes || No

Author’s Note: Sorry this one took a while, been a hell of a week. It's got a lot of angst, so prep yourselves guysss. Ends with smut, ofc. I hope you guys enjoy 🤍

Synopsis: Your family seeks uturu with the Metkayina in the village of Awa’atlu. You have a difficult time adjusting, and are assigned your own special teacher, Ralak.

<- Previous Next ->

“Y/n. For the love of Christ, you better tell me that the storm held ya up last night.” Jakes voice rings in your ear, waking you up.

Oh shit.

You look to your left to see the first rays of sunlight shining on Ralak’s sleeping, naked body, chest heaving slowly from his unfaltering breaths. Perched on his side, his face sits in his palm, as if he’s fallen asleep partially sitting up. Two fingers still nestled inside you, his facial muscles are slightly tensed, like he’s ready wake up any minute and tend to your every need, just like he’s been doing all night long. 

“Get your ass home. Now.” Jakes irate voice brings you back to reality.

Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.

What were you going to tell Jake? That the storm did keep you up? He’d never believe that. Not for a second. Either way, if you didn’t go now, this man would skin the love of your life. Unmated, in his bed, all before your second iknimaya? He’d try, at least.

“Sst-ah.” you let out a shaky breath, grimacing as you pull his fingers out of you. They’re covered in your cum, so much so that a thick string of slick connects you to his fingers when you pull your pelvis away. You scramble to your feet, wiping yourself up with the already damp cloth next to his bed.

I’ll be back, my love. You think, looking over at him one last time before rushing out of his marui.

On your way to the cave, you try to assess your state. It’s hard to tell, given the fact that your heart is pounding at a speed only an ikran could attain. Anxiety streams through your veins, but otherwise, you feel fairly normal. Maybe a little bit like you did after your first iknimaya, when you passed your dream hunt and had one too many glow worms. But nothing unmanageable.

Guess it’s over.

Finally arriving at the cave, frantic eyes search the body of water for your loincloth. It’s floating at the far end of the lake, so you dive in. As you’re swimming, you catch a whiff of your own scent, mixed with Ralak’s. You bring your arm to your nose and take a deep breath. “Fuck.” you curse under your breath, submerging your entire body in the water, trying to bathe his scent off you.

You knew you scented each other, but you didn’t know that it would linger this long. You scrub your body, paying extra attention to your chest and neck. Time is going faster than you can move. But it’s like the more you scrub, the more you rub it into your skin – into your essence.

“Forget this.” you huff, grabbing your loincloth and swimming back to sand. You wring it out, slip inside and tie the knot hastily. One last look back on his marui pod, and you’re gone like the wind – quick and silent.

The trek back home is nerve-wracking, you feel so uneasy that you could feel something in your throat. A lump. You swallow repeatedly, trying to get rid of it, but it grows a little bigger for every step you take. By the time you’re at your marui door, you feel like you can’t breathe.

Neteyam smells you first, wreaking of a male na’vi, nose scrunching at the odour. He huffs a harsh breath through his nostrils, attempting to rid the lingering scent from of his lungs. He examines your condition – clammy skin with little colour left in it. Eyes trailing up to your face, he could see the fear written all over it, along with something else. Something like –

“Jesus, what the hell were you thinking?!” Jake hisses through clenched teeth.

“D-dad. I-I can explain.” you stutter, throat so tight you can barely speak.

Jake pulls his head back, eyelids blinking furiously. It’s as if the scent quite literally hit him, square in the jaw. With his suspicions confirmed, his lips stretch into a thin line, his go to expression of disapproval. The type that makes your ears lay flat against your skull, and bottom lip jut out.

“I can smell him on you.” Jake brushes past you. “Stay with your brother.”

“Dad, please.” your voice is strained, fighting against the lump in your throat. “Where are you going?”

He stops dead in his tracks, back still turned to you, a hand flying up to his face to pinch the bridge of his nose. “To Tonowari, kid. Tsireya will teach you from now on.” He heaves a heavy sigh and walks away.

The anxiety quickly morphs into anger, bubbling in your veins and sizzling your skin. Your short fuse blows. How could he take this away from you? You weren’t a ‘kid’ anymore. You had passed your iknimaya back home, and you’re on the brink of passing it here, too. Despite that, he always treats you like this, like the late bloomer you are. He didn’t even care to know what really happened.

“Not a fucking kid!” you shout after him, only for him to shake his head and continue walking.

“Sis.” Neteyam mutters, gently guiding you into the marui pod by your arm.

You shrug him off, storming past him to dive into your bed, burying your face into your pillow – damp from last night’s tears. It only becomes wetter as your fresh tears stream down your face. You couldn’t help it, you cried whenever you felt overwhelmed with anything. Sadness. Happiness. Anger. Frustration.

The sound of your privacy curtain being drawn back snaps your head up from your pillow. It’s Neteyam, standing over you with a face of concern, a bowl of steamed fish in one hand and a cup of water in the other. He sighs quietly, crouching down to come eye to eye with you. “You were in heat, weren’t you?” He states, already knowing the answer. “You should eat and drink something.” He places the bowl and cup on the floor next to you.

You sit up, supporting your torso with your arms behind your back. Neteyam. The older, caring bother, always looking out for everyone but himself. Of course, he would be the one to care enough to find out what you’ve been through the past day. “Yup. Late bloomer finally got her heat.” you speak of yourself harshly, taking the cup of water and chugging it.

“You smell gross.” he chuckles breathily, nudging the bowl of fish closer to you.

“Thanks, big brother. Appreciate it.” you giggle between cries, nudging it back to him. “Not hungry.”

His arms rest on his knees, braids swaying in his face as he looks behind him before dropping his head. “Agh.” he lifts his head, staring at you for a few seconds, as if he were contemplating something. “You should not have done that. Not before your iknimaya.”

“I didn’t! Nothing... like that happened, Tey. Ralak isn’t like that.” your head hangs low as you utter the words. “He’s... a gentle giant.”

Neteyam scoffs, straightening his spine. “Gentle giant? He looks like he eats na’vi for breakfast.”

“Hey –” you sniffle, glaring up at him, “I like him, Tey. A lot. He’s good for me.”

Neteyam’s features soften. As if hearing your words plucked a string of sympathy in his heart. As much as he wants to help you, he can’t. Not with a direct order from his father. He shakes his head, eyes closed, and brows furrowed.

That’s his way of saying, ‘Sorry. Can’t’.

You sigh, bringing your knees to your chest to hide your face. You can smell Ralak’s scent now that your nose is near your thighs. It fills your lungs with every breath you take. His pheromones. His aphrodisiac. His arousal. He left it all on you, rubbed into your skin so deep it seems to have altered your own scent.

Is this what scenting does?  

Soon you’re breathing heavily, trying to savour what left you have of him – of last night. It makes you heavy in the head, like all the strength has left your body. You feel your face warm up, the heat spreading to the tips of your ears. You’re tired. Defeated.

“Neteyam! Neteyam!” Lo’ak’s faint voice sounds frantic.

You hear Neteyam shuffling to his feet to go and check what his brother is on about. “Stay here, got it?”

“Mhm.” you hum, too tired to even lift your head.

The sound of Lo’ak yanking back your privacy curtain makes you jump out of your skin, nearly knocking over the bowl of steamed fish. You stare up at him wide eyed, to see him motioning over to the door of your marui. Your brows kiss in confusion, unsure of what’s going on.

“Heard you were in... hea-a situation. Just gonna borrow big bro for a second, cool?” he raises his brows, nudging his head towards the door in an emphasized manner.

A smile pulls at your lips once you realize what he’s doing for you. You wipe your puffy eyes with the back of your hand and shuffle to your feet. “I owe you, Lo’.”

Ralak’s POV

Ralak rouses to an empty bed. He sits up quickly, scanning his marui for any sign of you. Nothing. The only thing that remains is your potent scent flooding the room. The only proof that you were ever here. “Oh, y/n.” he groans, head slumping into his hands.

You were gone. Gone like you were never here to begin with. Taking a moment to gather his thoughts, he tried not to assume the worst. But what if – what if it was the worst? To be used and discarded like an object. All over again. Surely, there’s no way that you would do this to him, not after opening-up to you like that. Not after last night. Not after the words you uttered to one another before going to sleep –

‘I love you’.

But why does it feel the same? The same as that day. The day he was in a marui pod like this one, young, bare skinned and short haired, kneeling before his own karyu. His chest tightens, the walls of his throat closing in on one another. He can feel it creeping up his spine. The flashbacks. The tremors. The nausea. Rushing to his feet, he makes his way over to the shelf well-stocked with bottles of ‘fermented fruit’ – pxir [beer; alcohol].

A poison to many, but an antidote to him.

Dust had settled on the bottles since the last day he reached for them. The day you became his tanhì. That’s why he had never brought you up here, he never wanted you to see the truth. The way he copes with his emotions – bottling them up and then chugging it down when they became just too much.

The bottle opens with a pop, strong, bitter scent wafting up his nose, replacing the scent of you in his lungs. He takes a quick swig, baring his teeth from the sting of it trickling down his throat. “Ahh.” He sighs a breath of relief, feeling the alcohol already taking effect, loosening his chest, and clearing his throat.  

Yet he can still feel the shiver of his spine, and the churn of his stomach.

“Shit.” he curses, taking another swig. Cursing himself for trusting another after he made the vow to never trust again. Another swig. For facing the part of him that he’s denied since he came into adulthood. Another swig. For letting someone in. Another swig. For allowing himself to love you.

Alas, a clear mind and body – rid of the memories of his past.

He readies himself for his bath, something he often did to relax. Just like he did last time you left him.

----

Time is of the essence. With no idea of when Jake will be back, you move quickly. You weave through the webbing of the mangrove roots, ducking and dodging those that jut out. You take a short cut, bouncing over the netting of a cluster of marui pods on the way to Ralak’s.

Eyes guardedly stuck to your feet, you bump into Ka’ani, the man who replaced Ralak’s role as fisherman – faceplanting into his bare chest. Arms instinctively wrapping around you, he holds you close until you regain your balance. Admittedly, he’s a little too close for comfort, his face nestled in the crown of your head. You hear quick, nasally breaths, muffled by your hair.

Is he... sniffing me right now?

You shove him off you, probably a little too rough to be considered friendly, and take a few steps back. “Sorry, Ka’ani.” you mutter, gingerly walking around him.

“No problem, at all.” he smirks, raising his hands and making space for you to leave.   

With a quick shake of your head, you continue making your way to Ralak. The closer you get, the more a giddy smile spreads across your face. Though you were the bearer of bad news, you can’t ignore the flutters in your stomach. The same flutters you had when you first laid eyes on him – the day Eywa herself told you he’s the one.

Your mate.

Your legs move faster, as fast as they can go, until the sand slackens your steps. Silky, fine sand – always the first thing to let you know that you’ve arrived. You can’t help the excitement bubbling from your tummy and up your throat. “Ralak!” you blurt out, eager to find your love.

A tall figure in the distance catches your eye, it looks as if he were going into the cave. You wave your hands above your head, shouting his name as you lope towards him. “Ralak!”

The figure stops, turning around to acknowledge your calls. He stands still for a minute, before walking towards you with a stagger in his step. Tail perking up instantaneously, your hand flies to your bare hip, searching for your medicine pouch. You’re running on the tips of your toes again, concern and worry replacing the flutters low in your belly.

“Wha-t is it?” you shout, voice wavering as you close the distance between your bodies.

You crash into him with a smack, making the typically sturdy giant wobble. Now your ears art alert, perturbed by his odd behaviour. Gently pushing you away, his large hands grip your upper arms, fingertips touching once another. Blue, hazed orbs peer down at you, extra glossy and lidded.

“Are you sick? Wounded?” you question, resisting his gentle pushes to search his body. 

Nostrils flickering above his pursed lips, he leans into your neck. He pulls back with a huff, blowing hot air through his nose, onto your face. Your eyelashes flutter, face of concern quickly morphing into one of confusion.

Everyone is sniffing me today.

Head snapping to the left, his eyes search the webs of the mangrove roots off in the distance. A guttural growl rumbles deep in Ralak’s chest, thinned lips curling over his canines, flashing them before your eyes. You watch in awe as his brows lower, knotting together to turn his eyes beady. Ears flat against his skull, the scent of another na’vi scrunches his nose.

That’s a new look.

“Ralak.” your voice is breathy and small – laced with fright.

His growl grows louder, coming from the pit of his stomach, deep and powerful. Lengthy fingers tightening around your arms, he spins you around and tucks you behind him in one swift move. His name slips off your tongue once more, quick, and unsure. He has one hand perched on the dip of your waist, holding you close behind this towering frame.

“Come out.” he growls gruffly, straightening his spine to present at his full height.

The two words double-knot your stomach, sending you wiggling into the sink of his back, face peeking through the crack of his arm and side. Your eyes flicker from side to side, looking for whatever – whoever he’s talking to. Meanwhile, your fingers grip the band on his loincloth, the only thing available on his body to hold.

Silence.

“Or I make you.” He rasps the warning through his four, pointed fangs.

Perhaps if Ralak wasn’t here the knots in your belly would have tightened by now, to the point where you would feel queasy. But the hiss fizzling from the back of his throat puts your nerves at ease – your body sensing its safety in his presence.

Out comes a brawny, wide na’vi, from behind the large, thick roots of the mangroves. His hands are splayed out, representing something of caution. No – surrender. He approaches Ralak slowly. Warily.

“Sorry, brother. I did not know she was yours.” Ka’ani says impishly.

Jaw snapping open, his hiss comes out full force. It’s loud and thick, almost grating. Much like a roar. Though you knew it wasn’t for you, it shook you up, tugging at the string in your grip as your body jolts forward into his.

“She belongs to no one.” His top lip twitches as he spits the vile words, stinging your heart in the process. Am I not his? What about last night? You think, tightening your grip on the band of his loincloth.

“It looks as if she belongs to you, Tak.” Ka’ani leans to the left, chin jutting out as he tries to catch a glimpse of you. “Look at her, holding on to your –”

“Lewng! [shame]. Tracking her scent.” Ralak hisses, turning his body to hide you from his predatory eyes. “Leave.”

“Ah. Come on now, brot-” He spreads his arms wide, walking around Ralak towards you.

Ralak takes a step forward on his last word, nearly coming chest to chest with the shorter na’vi. A moment of silence passes between the two, as Ralak stares him down with vengeance in his eyes. A hand flies up to his hip, gripping the knife sheathed in its casing. “Now.”

Ka’ani straightens his back, eyes flickering between Ralak and yours that peek from behind him. His hands retract, hovering either side of his head as he retreats. Ralak maintains his position, with a hand keeping you tucked away whilst the other rests on his hip. Once Ka’ani’s figure is no longer visible, Ralak sighs, and turns his heel to make his way back to his much-needed bath.

“Thanks...” you huff, walking close behind him.

“You women and your heats.” he mutters as he walks faster, ripping his loincloth out of your grip.

“Ex-cuse me?” your words bounce as you try to keep up with him. “You have no –”

“Do you understand what would have happened had I not been here? Do not be so reckless.” He tsks, as his feet come to a halt, balling his hands into fists.

“Reckless? All I did was walk here!” you shout, almost bumping into him again.

“Because you left to begin with.” he whispers through clenched teeth.

“What?” the question is breathy, hands perching on your knees to rest.

He turns around quickly, prompting you to stand at full height. Breathing heavily, he presses his warm body against yours, chin tucked into his chest to peer down at you. Instinctively, you perch on the tips of your toes, eyes lidded in anticipation of a kiss. Instead, he brings your wrists up to his nose, heated lips pressing against your supple skin.

“He scented you.” he mumbles quickly, lips pulling into a thin line before letting go and backing away.  

“Why? How? I only bumped into him.” you walk towards him, watching him turn his heel again. “Hey –” you reach out for his arm to pull him back around.

First you leave him this morning, then come back scented by another na’vi. He shrugs you off, hands now fiddling with the knot above the base of his tail as he nears the entrance of the cave. The knot of his loincloth comes undone, heavy, sheathed hunting knife silently making impact with the sand.

“Because he wants everything that’s mine.”

So, I am his. You think, one corner of your mouth curling upwards into a smirk.

“Oh, Ralak.” You stand at the cave’s opening, waiting in silence for a response.

He continues to keep his back turned to you, dips of his clenched glutes on full display. Despite last night, seeing him naked still makes you shy, cheeks turning red and hot from the blood that rushes to them. You watch him hastily put his hair in a sloppy bun as he submerges himself in the water.

“I need to speak with you about this morning” you mumble, eyes locked onto the ripple of his back muscles.

“No need. I understand.” he answers lowly, shimmying over to the bottle of fermented fruit propped on a rock in the cave.

“Understand what? It’s about –”

“You made a mistake. It was your heat. It is fine.” he mutters quickly, taking a swig at the last word.

A mistake? My heat?

The realization hits you, hard. You’d been so out of it, so delirious from your heat you hadn’t given a second thought about his confession. His trauma that he confided in you, in this very cave. It’s like stones in your heart – no, boulders. Weighing it down so heavily that it feels like there’s a pulse in your stomach.

How could you be so cruel? So thoughtless? So insensitive? To not even wake him and utter the words to his face. To allow him to wake up to an empty bed after letting down his walls and being so vulnerable to you. To be so caught up in your own head you couldn’t even bat an eye at the man who helped you through your first heat.

“Oh. Oh, Lak. No. No, it’s nothing like that.” you sputter out a trembling voice, sliding into the water to rush over to him. You rest your hand on his upper back, taking in the warmth of his skin. He feels feverish – hot to the touch.

What is he drinking?

You rub his back gently, bioluminescent freckles dancing from your caresses. Yet, he’s rigid. Cold. Distant. He’s not the Ralak you know, swaying side to side as he brings the lip of the bottle to his mouth.

“Stop, my love.” you coo, sliding your hand up his raised arm as you walk around him.  Pulling the bottle away from his lips, you cautiously place the pxir on a nearby ledge. “Ralak.” you whisper, staring up at him with worried eyes.

The sound of his name falling from your lips tilts his head back ever so slightly, like it pained him to even look at you. Curly, loose stands of hair frame his face, accentuating his angular features. He attempts to fix his mask of indifference to his face, but you can see through it. You see the anguish glossed over his lidded, inebriated eyes.

Ocean blue eyes.  

tw: flashback

His mind is elsewhere, dissociating back to the day of the incident. The night of his iknimaya celebration, where his own karyu cornered him in his family marui, engulfing him with her pheromones. Manipulating him with her heat to take care of her. To touch her.

He can hear the waves crashing into the shore, the pitter-patter of the rain on the roof of the marui, the roll of the thunder – her whispers in his ear, ‘I’ve been waiting too long for this. You are officially a man now. Make your karyu feel better, right here...’.

The smell of her pheromones is suffocating, more potent than any fermented fruit he’s ever had. It frightened him, feeling like he had no self-control. No way to stop his movements, no matter how much he screamed at his body to move, run – anything.

It is what made him vow to never lose control of himself. His composure.

He can feel the heaviness of his body. The lethargy. The way his lungs refused to fill, no matter how hard he tried to breathe. When he woke, he was alone, sitting in the corner in a pool of his own sweat, curled in on himself. His karyu left, to never return. Leaving nothing but the lingering smell of her heated scent behind. 

tw: end of flashback

“My karyu” you hum softly, placing his hand on your chest.

When you first called him that, he almost grimaced. But as time passed, you made the word bearable. You gave it a new meaning, a new feeling. Eventually filling him with eagerness to hear it fall from your flushed lips. In tones of excitement, frustration... pleasure.

You hold his thumb, and give it a squeeze, trying to bring him back from wherever he is. Your heart weighed even heavier, seeing him drift away and detach when he’s right in front of you. “I’m not going anywhere. I’m right here. Feel me. Feel my heartbeat. Focus on it and come back to me.”

The words echo in his skull, reverberating between the thick bone. He can hear you, feel you. With each thump of your heart, the heaviness of his body lifts, the scent of her fades, the pitter-patter of the storm subdues until nothing, but that thump can be heard. His eyes finally flicker down to yours, ears and brows twitching at the pulse of your heart.

Only a bottle could do that for him. Bring him back. Yet, you did it with the mere sound of your heart.

“I’m sorry, Lak. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry I was so thoughtless. I’m sorry... that happened to you.” the words are shaky, flowing over your quivering bottom lip. “I would never. Ever. Ever. Ever –” you blubber, shaking your head, “Ever, do that to you. I-I had to leave because of my father. He’s punishing me. Forbidding me from seeing you. Having Tsireya teach me instead. I should have woken you.”

Another arm snakes around his waist, bringing him in closer to you. You slump your head into his chest, letting the tears flow and stain his skin. “I don’t regret a thing. I meant everything I said. I-I see you, Ralak” you sputter, breath hitching from the crying.

“Tanhì” he croaks, kissing the crown of your head as he wraps his arms around you to hold you closer.   

“I love you” The three words are said in unison as you cling onto one another.

Alcohol still coursing through his veins, Ralak’s heavy body slumps into you, slowly shifting you both against the cave wall. He presses your back against the rocky surface, unwrapping his arms from your waist to support his body weight with a hand on the wall. He leans in, brushing his cheek against yours.

“I will miss you.” he whispers huskily next to the shell of your ear.

“I’ll miss you, too.” you whisper back, head pulling back to meet his gaze.

Your eyes lock for a moment, an undeniable tension now budding in the air and making your breaths quicken. He inches even closer, lips brushing against yours as you exchange the same hot breath until you’re light in the head.

He kisses you roughly – sloppily.

Tongue slipping into your mouth, you get a taste of what he’s been drinking all day. It’s a little sweet, with undertones of various fruits native to the reef people. But once the sweetness wears off, the bitter aftertaste makes your brows gather. He pulls away, revealing heavy-lidded eyes with thin blue rings for irises, flickering side to side as they stare into yours.

Chests heaving in synchrony, you both struggle to catch your breath. Hands cupping each other’s face, your lips crash into one another again, body language hungry and desperate for each other’s touch. Ralak shoves his knee between your legs, providing you with the friction your body has been begging for. Your body moves on its own, humping at his thigh as best you can in the water.

“I-I want... you.” The desperate words part your bruised, flushed lips, hand sliding up his back to caress his kuru [queue].

He shakes his head, brows gathering tightly. “Not now. Not here. We do it the right way.”

“Then...” you pant, voice laced with desperation as your hands make their way to his hips, dainty fingers wrapping around his hardened girth, “...give me something else.”

Breath turning raggedy, he struggles to maintain his composure. The influence of the alcohol surging through his body proves it to be an even more difficult task. He takes a deep breath, withdrawing his knee from your legs to spin you around in one quick motion. Ralak tries his best to be gentle with you, shoving you into the wall to press his aching cock against you.

A soft moan parts your lips; thin, fuzzy tail wrapping around his thigh in attempts to bring you closer. Eywa, did that push him closer to the edge. Your tail had been one of his favourite things about you from the day you first locked eyes, so slender and delicate. Nothing like his. It not only fascinated him. It aroused him.

It makes him push into you even harder, tip of his cock throbbing against your lower back. He craves to be even closer to you – to be inside you. To rut into you until your voice becomes so hoarse from screaming his name. Over and over. Again, and again. Fingers hurriedly fiddling with the knot of your loincloth, he pants a few greedy, rough kisses along your upper back.

“Oh! Ralak, I-I think –” you moan lowly, his touches throwing you into a daze.

“What?” he huffs, fingers coming to a halt in fear that he’s being too rough with you.

“I think I’m still in heat.” you lie, or maybe it wasn’t a lie. You feel so woozy in the head that you’re not even sure what’s going on anymore. All that sits at the forefront of your mind is him claiming you as his.

“Is that so?” he lets out a breath of relief, a chuckle if you will.

“Yes. Can you help me?” you pant, trembling voice feigned with innocence.

“Ah. Let me check, little one.” He buries his face into the nape of your neck, pulling back with a loud sigh through his nose. A growl rumbles in his chest and up his throat. “I can still smell him.” The scent of another so deep into your skin makes him want to mark you. To sink his lengthy canines into your neck for the smell to seep out, only to be replaced by his.

“Then fix it.” you breathe, head dipping forward to open yourself up to him.

“Oh?” he smiles open mouthed, brushing his pointed fangs against your silken skin, making your back arch on instinct. Submitting to him and his touch. Open mouth lingering over your neck, his jaw closes to graze his teeth against you. He sucks lightly on your skin, puckered lips pulling off with a pop.

Of course, he’d make you wait for that too. He was only ‘helping’ you, right now.  

He kicks your feet apart, spreading your legs for him to settle in closer behind you. A string of your slick connects your thighs together, breaking apart when he rubs his cock against your bare cunt. He begins rubbing his face into the back of your neck, scenting you as his.

“Mine. Yes?” he growls, thrusting himself against your slippery slit.   

“Yes.” You spread your legs further apart, standing on the tips of your toes to provide him with better access. “Please.” You let out a pathetic mewl.

He grunts in frustration. He wants nothing more than to thrust himself inside you, stretching your pussy out with his huge cock. And with those little, sweet pleas, it’s almost too hard to resist. But he does. He pulls away, gaze snapping down to the rope of wetness connecting your most intimate parts together.

Cocking a brow, his hand comes between your sticky pelvises, fingers coiling around the string of slick before they glide over your pussy and spread your folds. Your wetness drips down his digits, pooling in the palm of his hand. “So wet. Maybe you are in heat.” he mumbles, pressing his lips against your back, peppering kisses down the curve of your shoulder.  

Ralak fondles with your puffy clit, rubbing tight circles into it with his slickened fingertips. Your hips squirm around from the white-hot pleasure tightening your core. It’s just not enough. Perhaps it’s just residual heat, but you feel so, so empty. A yearning deep in your womb, to be filled and stretched. Your hips buck forward, slipping his fingertips to prod at your entrance, before pushing back on him to try and sink them inside you.

Needy body language riling up the giant behind you, his harsh kisses move their way up to your ear. “Say it, tanhì.” he groans lowly, positioning his finger at your tight hole.

“I n-need you inside of me!” you cry desperately, shoving yourself back into him.

“You listen so well, paysyul.” he exhales a hot breath into the shell of your ear, sinking his thick finger inside you, twisting his wrist so that he can curl it right into your sweet spot.

“Oh, shit.” you moan breathily, cheek pressed firmly against the rocky wall.

“That is why you learn so quickly.” He fingers you roughly, expertly working out a squelch with each curl of his digit.

The feeling is like heat, shooting down your spine and pooling in your pelvis. It makes your hips spasm, chasing the fiery sensation in hopes to put it out. His finger brings relieve, satiating the itch as your sweet spot swells from pure bliss. He knows exactly where to touch, and how to touch.

Yet, it still isn’t enough.

“More! ‘ts not enough!” you cry, writhing underneath him.

He finds your little cries amusing, letting a chuckle evade his lips. How could something so small act so mighty? He slides another digit in, feeling your tight pussy walls stretch to accommodate him. He hears the little whimper bubbling up your throat, letting him know you need a moment to adjust.

“Taking my fingers so well, hm?” he praises you with a shaky voice, planting a gentle kiss behind your ear.

“Mmmn! Please!” Another plea falls from your lips, a plea for him to move – to make you cum. He sets a relentless pace, stimulating the sensitive spot in your gummy, hot walls, working lengthy moans and mewls from you.

With the way he’s fingerfucking you, it feels as if your nerves are on fire. The coil tightly wound in your core ready to snap any second now. Your brows pinch together in fervour, mouth falling open to allow heavy, hot breaths to escape.

“Close! So close! Gonna! Gonna –” Your words catch in your throat, leaving you breathless and tense around his fingers.

“Make yourself cum.” he orders gruffly, stopping all movement once he feels you tighten around his digits.

You gasp, hips moving on their own to chase the orgasm he just took away from you. “No, no. You know I can’t. Please.” you sputter, pushing against the wall to ride his fingers.

“You can. And you will.” he growls, bending his fingers as encouragement.

You quickly accept your fate, holding on tightly to whatever pleasurable feeling remains and running with it. You push back on him, squirming around as you try to make yourself cum. Closing your eyes, you tune into your body, feeling what feels good and where. But the position that you’re in makes it even harder to do it yourself.

“Just fuck me!” you cry desperately, frustration so pent up you couldn’t help the outburst.

“Language.” he hisses, shoving his fingers so deep inside you that your slick coats his knuckles.

“Fuck! Please.” you beg, reaching behind you to grab his wrist.

“No.” he smirks, looking down at how your cunt sucks in his digits, listening to your pleading and begging.

He just wants to hear a little more. To hear how badly you want him. He loves the way you squirm around, sputtering nonsense from being so fucked out by just his fingers. He loves the little noises your pussy makes for him and can’t wait to hear how they’ll sound once his cock is stuffed inside you.

“Ralak. Please. Please make me cum!” you cry, using his wrist as leverage to fuck back into him.

He slides his hand down your stomach, fingers playing with your swollen, neglected clit. He’s pumping his digits in and out of your dripping cunt, feeling your slick dribble down his hand. It doesn’t take long for you to near your climax, pussy walls clamping down around his fingers.

“Let go. Cum for me.” he groans, swollen tip of his cock oozing beads of precum onto your lower back.

“Oh, fuckfuckfuck!” you let out a hoarse cry, entire body shuddering underneath him “Cumming! Cumming!”

“That’s my girl.” he hums proudly, scissoring his fingers open to stretch you out.  

You let out a high-pitched whimper, hint of pain making your eyes water. Then a wave of ecstasy ripples through you, leaving your legs trembling beneath you. He snakes his arm around your waist, holding you up while you ride out of your high, sprinkling your shoulder with kisses.

Once you come down from your high, you lean back into him, resting your head against his chest. Huffing and puffing, you try to catch your breath as you turn around to cup his swollen balls. “My turn to make you feel good.”

To your surprise, he rests a hand on your arm, pulling it away from him. He looks down at you through blown pupils, arousal plastered all over his face. Beads of sweat trickle down his temples, wet strands of curled hair stuck to his cheeks, he sighs the words. “Not today, tanhi. I must get you back, now.”

[pocket-jack]

Hey, guys! I decided to torture myself before sleep beacause... Why not? So, here's KidKiller's rough sheets with some headcanons I have for the guys (probably with a lot off mistakes cus my browser refuses to fix them for me)

Kid time, baby

I draw him differently now. I know his face looks more... diamond shaped in anime, but I can't get rid of his square coded energy, so... Heart-shaped it is!

When he recieved his eye scar he didn't lose the ability to see, but now it get's dry really fast and if he won't do something about it it'll gonna ache.

He had multiple piercings on his ear, but his powers just kept pulling them and one day almost ripped his ear of, so he (with a manly tears) decided to take them off.

I headcanon him wearing a corset, because he's a little chubby and he can't get rid of this extra fat (not with his appetites). Also everytime when he takes it off, not only he's forced to look at his hanging stomach, but he's also has to fight off Killer. Killer's only dream was for Kid to be well fed and happy.

Nor his, nor Killer's sexuality is defined by them, but actually based out of other's observations. Kid is pansexual because he's kinda gender blind. For him it's confusing that you're weak just because you have tits and extra hole between your legs. He's also demiromantic. Both of those preference he acquired during Kutsukku (where you couldn't trust anyone, even your lover. And where the gender norms were the least of your concerns)

He also have undiagnosed ADHD which mostly give him extra impulsivity and also now the metal can speak (thank ye, neurodivergency!). Sometimes it's stresses him the hell off, especially during Kutsukku. He could not sleep because of all of this buzzing he kept hearing from EVERYWHERE. Now he can control it, but sometimes it returnd and he has to suffer.

Metal also responds to his hidden emotions. It may float when he thinks, reflects or remembering something. It may rumble when he's angry, concerned, scared. Or it may form something if he's happy, in love or something like that.

He's hard rock kinda guy, we all know this, but I headcanon him as a music lover in general (so whatever makes his brain go bzzt, mostly rock). I find Thrown a couple of month ago and it's sounds like something Kid would like (probably even kin, esp Backfire). MSI is a basic thing for him to have (every punk need at least one song in their playlist). I guess not every person will understand it, but Пшлнхй is such a Kid coded song (Every Russian proverb, but one part is just sending you to fuck yourself is something that Kid would do irl. The chorus is just... mmm)

Killer, my beloved!!!!

I love headcanoning him as androgenous. He has a feminine features: oval shaped face, eyes with big eyelashes, even his lips is a little softer than the average male lips. That is the main reason why he hid his face, because everyone would bully him fot it when he was young. Killer was confused with a girl a lot during his time on Kutsukku.

During timeskip he strained a lot of muscles just to get stronger. He was neglecting himself most of the time, because he had a mission: to become stronger so he'll never fail to protect Kid ever again. They also been really distant during their training. Only when Killer hurted his arm they bounded again. Kid was surprisingly a good mentor for his healing. Probably because their trauma was almost the same

When he's wearing a mask he usually get's his hair out of the way so it wouldn't mess with his vision

Pre timeskip he wanted to work on his style, feeling obliged to do so, cus his crew was dressing up in colorful styles. He choose to fit into more West Bluish kinda style (cowboy boots and pants). But then anxiety hitted him and suddenly he felt too vissible and everyone was looking at him and... Let's just say it wasn't a pleasant expirience for him. He just wanted to show that he was a part of the crew too, but now he feels himself too overreacting and dramatic and stuff. It took a lot of time for everyone to convince him that it wasn't about the look, but more about the comfort. With their support Killer started wearing something he likes more, and it felt fantastic. He actually started to like himself in the mirror a bit more after timeskip and then Wano happened

Killer is asexual beacuse of the amount of trauma he suffered during his childhood. I hc him having a low libido too. He's still feels romantic attraction (only for Kid), and if he asks, Killer will have sex with him without hesitation. But it's only for Kid, OR for his sake

It is so logical for him to have OCD. Just him casualy living and then the dread that if he won't do something usefull his crew will see how fucking usless and worthless he actually is and live him behind the same his parents did just suddenly hits him. Oh hey! Anxiety! Abandonment issues! This man will explode, please, give him a hug.

It got worse after Wano. He's doing bad things with his face and no one knows. Even Kid. (I love making them suffer for the sake of Hurt\Comfort)

I am 100% sure Killer is a Queen guy. It just gives me Killer vibes... The same with Elton John. And also... To fit in his pre timeskip cowboy vibes into the oven,,, He's actually like country rock alongside with glam rock. Barns Courtney is his favorate

So... How do you like my silly little headcanons? Maybe I post something about Heat and Wire too. Welp, I'm fainting out of exaustion, bye!

[stuffforme2]

Okay listen I lvoe the pjo books and series with all ym heart but.. everyone talks about them like they're perfect WHICH THEYRE NOT any problems are kinda brushed under the rug and I find thst kinda werid? Like you'll see other books and TV shows get dragged and canceled for the stuff in Riordan books and yet pjo doesn't?? So.. uhhHHHH yeah that's jsut something I noticed.

The weird relationshipd ynamics. Rick is like allergic to someone bring okay with being single or jsut aromantic like you can say Reyna but her having a crush kn Jason?? Yes she rejected Apollo but her relationship with Jason deterioted brcuz she had a 'crush' on the guy and that doesn't really amke sense to me (I can go into so much detail kn this)

AND LEO AND CALYPSO OMFG that is a toxic relationship. The age gap. The way calypso treats Leo. The fact Leo SHOULD NOT be with someone like this man hasn't dealt with his attachment and Abandonment issues like st all?!

The literal only black character in the pjo books being beckendorf.. then he dies. Then the Korean/Asian (I'm not sure sorry) character dies, Ethan. And like I understand Percy is hinted st being Hispanic (have seen many ppl talk about this dont mnow if it's common knowldhe) but it's never confirmed or added??? I know Rick fixes it later but it's still weird to me lmaoo

Rick unable to keep consistent personality. Woobigying Nico OH MY GOD NICO HE BECOMES GAY AND THSTS WHDT EVERYONE FUCKING FOCUSES ON AND HE SHOULD'VE NEVER GOTTEN WITH WILL ATLWAST NOT THAT QUICK it's not healthy. Their relationship was rushed and didn't make sense I felt like people only like ot becuz it's a gay relationship??

And oh mygods— Samirah. I am not Muslim and I am not an expert on the Nuslim religion but there is so much shitbthatbeas wrong in thst book that I even knew was incorrect and jsut weird to happen?! The AMOUNT OF TIMES HER HIJAB CAME OFF and I'm also like "yaayyyy representation" but it could've been as easy as one Google search. one.

Jason. Jason as a whole. He had the most potential out of ANYONE and personally I think he had more potential then Percy like his story is so INTERESTING and then.. Rick knocked him iut with a brick multiple times, didn't work kn his sotry or trauma at all, then KILLED HIM. Same with Ethan. I am so Vitter about these two.. HELL EVEN LEO AND FRANK.

Also the way he made Annabeth first quest (first quest SHE IS LEADING AND IS HER PROHECY) all about Percy. I was reading it and I was like "bitxh— this is Annabeth Quest?!" LIKE he it pissed me off that Annabeth was swept to rhe side as Percy's lvoe interest giving her knly enough personality and stary to make her jnteredting enough to eb loved but never delving jntk it into Mark kf Athena and even at Mark of Athena it all rounded back tk her and Percy's relationship LIKE JESUS CHRIST DO THESE MFERS PASS THE BELLDAN TEST?!

The low key incest at the beginning ricj writing that all the demigods had the same impish features at rhe start and then.. jsut.. CHSNGING IT?!

Not letting a virgin goddess who has no history of having children have.. children.. NOW you may be wondering 'but then how would we get Annabeth?'— JUST GiVE ATHENA HER FAVOURITE CHOSEN PPL LIKE SHE DID WITH ODYSSEUS let her stay childless. Jsut let her choose some children she'd like as hers wonce they're Bron and she then blesses them as her heroes, that's how she treats them any way and it also gets rid of the incest?!

Also the fact it's implied that Annabeth is only smart becuz she's a child of Athena.. Rick made a virgin goddess technically have children so he can have a smart women character and that's just.. EuGGHHhHHh JUST LET HER BE SMART IT NOT THAT HARD "Oh, no, I'm not smart because Athena chose me.. Athena chose me because I was already smart" Smacks you with common fucking sense.

Also Annabeth ALWAYS needing to eb saves and its always done by a man. OMFG AND GROVES GF DHE HAS NO PERSONALITY OUTSIDE OF BEING SOEM GUSY GF EVEN THOUGH HES GONE FOR MKNTHS AND BAREKY CONTAXTS HER?!

The whole apheodite cabin. The whole aphrodite cabin. The whole aphrodite cabin.

The fact it's clear Rick doesn't think girly girls cant be strong or into fighting or able to wield a fuckign weapon. The way he makes nearly every girly girl into a total mean bitch or ruins their characters.

[dovkss]

hawks confronting reader for trying to hide their stockholm syndrome

word count: 957

warning: 18+; stockholm syndrome, emotional abuse, mentions of kidnapping, manhandling, bratty! reader, threatening, yandere themes

a/n: a lil sum to make up for lost timeee! ;(

Days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months. As he had planned, your feelings for him had began to shift.

No longer were you fighting him, spitting at him, yelling at him. No longer were you being disobedient, pushing his face away when he tried to kiss you.

No longer were you being an ungrateful whore.

You couldn't help but feel attached to him. It was hard not to. You haven't had any contact with an actual human besides him for the past few months. And, boy, were they long.

You got used to seeing his face. His gorgeous face. You were now comfortable enough to caress the fluffy red feathers he would leave in your space on purpose.

After being locked up in the basement during the day, you began to actually look forward to when he came back to you from patrolling or whatever hero work he had to do for the day.

When that door opened and he stepped through it, you found yourself smiling or letting out a sigh of relief.

You were aware of what was happening to you. You had read about it online some years ago. Stockholm Syndrome was what it was called... you think. People who are victims of abuse will start to empathize with their abusers to cope with the trauma they faced.

Well, he never hit you. Nor did he force you to do anything you didn't want to.

That's not abuse, is it? Surely not, you were perfectly fine and able to take care of yourself.

He kidnapped you, yeah. But... he was nice to you. He fed you, washed you, kept you warm, and bought you your favorite things!

That's not abuse.

Takami also took note of your change of heart. You never knew when your gaze on him lingered a little longer than normal. Your smile now wasn't sarcastic or half-assed.

At first he thought you were up to something. Maybe you were creating a ploy to blindside him in an attempt to escape.

Like he’d let that happen. Of course not.

But knew he had you wrapped around his finger when you let his lips come in context with your neck without putting up a fight. You were doing so well for him.

Only problem was you not admitting it. That annoyed the hell out of him.

You couldn’t let him know that you were coming around, then he would be getting his way. But if he was keeping you safe, what would be the harm in that?

No harm at all. Just a hurt ego. If he knew he was getting his way, you’d never be able to live it down. That cocky bastard.

"You cozy?" He asked you, his tone light. You nodded as you sat on the opposite end of the warm couch. It was movie night tonight, it was his turn to pick the movie.

You both sat in silence for the first half hour of the movie. You could see in the corner of your eye him looking at you. You bit your lip nervously, only trying to focus on the movie.

"Ya wanna sit next to me?" His next question was simple enough. You looked over at him. You knew you'd never forgive yourself for this. You scooted over a bit, your shoulder almost touching his.

He reached over and pulled your head into his neck and grabbed your legs to dangle over his. You huffed but said nothing.

"You startin' to like me yet?" He rested his head on top of yours. You rolled your eyes, not saying anything in response.

"Not even a little?" He chuckled. "This 'playing hard to get' act is getting old, Babe."

"It's not an act. You're just 'hard to get rid of'."

In a flash, you felt his demeanor change. Suddenly, he's on you before you even know it. He slams you back into the cushion, bringing his face to your cheeks, squishing them together. “I hope you know that you're never, ever getting rid of me. Nobody is fucking coming for you either, so I suggest you come to terms with that now."

You wriggle under his firm grip, trying to pry him off of you. You found it to be useless as he brought your face closer to his, forcing you to make eye contact with his yellow ones.

You couldn't lie to yourself. Being this close to him made you feel some things. You panicked.

"M' sorry, please, let me go..." you begged, closing your eyes. You hoped he listened, as your face was growing hot and beginning to cramp. You braced yourself for the nail marks that you would feel embedded in your skin.

He grinned. "Give me a kiss."

You leaned forward slightly, pecking his lips. He scoffed and shook you a bit, making you whine. "A real one, c'mon now."

You obeyed and attached your lips to his. He wasted no time slipping his tongue into your mouth. He wasn't just kissing you, he was letting you know that he was in charge.

For as long as you're here.

He pulled away with a chuckle before pushing your head down away from him further into the couch, then letting go. He returned to his spot while you lay there, trying to catch your breath.

You hadn't even noticed your thighs being clenched together. Your eyes watered slightly at the idea.

You were losing it. You were losing yourself, slowing turning into his. Your life now in his hands. Your freedom being stripped away from you.

“When I get outta here, m’ gonna kill you.” Your words were timid and empty.

The only thing left he had to change about you was that bratty mouth.

[igotanidea]

Trauma : Batboys x PTSD!fem!s/o

platonic version was here, but since @ultravioletqueen asked me to make a bit more advanced in terms of relationship here's how I see the romantic verse. And I took a bit different approach to this one.

Please, be aware that my knowledge about PTSD is limited, but I know about panic attack and anxiety so the story may be a bit more of the second kind.

Also, I'm biased towards Jay and I'm not sorry for that.

DICK

"I'm back!" his yelling came from the door and judging by the tone someone may think that he was gone for a week not just for an hour-long shopping. But when she did not response straight away some strange feeling grew in his stomach. "Y/N? Baby?"

'I...... I'm here......." the faintest of the voices came from the kitchen and he rushed there, still in his jacket and shoes, not caring about the risk of sploching the floor.

"It's happening again?" he asked, falling onto his knees on the floor next to her and she just nodded "Oh, my baby, you poor thing. Can I hug you?"

"Yes, please" she clung onto him with all the force she could gather in this weakened state, sobbing and shaking while he was rubbing her back, holding her tightly against his chest and kissing the top of her head repeatedly.

"I'm sorry" she cried "I'm sorry, it just won't go away after all this time. I'm sorry there's something wrong with me, that I'm broken. I'm sorry...."

"Stop it." she whispered, tightening the grip, but making sure it was stil comfortable for her and not suffocating. "You're not broken. You're just scarred and it makes you who you are. It makes you the person I love. The sensitive, helpful person who despite everything see the good in the world and fights to make it a better place for people. The person I chose to be with."

"Dickie....." she cried even more, hiding face in his shirt.

"Sh..." he cooed "Let it out. Let it all out. I'm here for you, love."

"But....."

"You don't have to talk. Unless you want to. Do you want to?"

"No."

"Then I'll just stay with you. For whatever long you need me. Hopefully, forever?"

"I don't ever want you to go." with every shook of her body, his heart skipped a bit. She shouldn't have been through all this pain and trauma, but there was no way he could change the past. The only thing he was capable of was making sure that the future held as many positive feelings and memories as possible.

"That's good. Cause I am one hell of a hard one to get rid of." he smiled. "Let;s get you off this floor and to bed, all right?"

"Mhm....." she muttered and Dick just picked her up, bridal style carrying her to the bedroom, covering with blanket and snuggling next to her in attempt to provide her with love, comfort and safety.

JASON

"Why are you up?"

"AH! What the fuck Jay?!" the cloth she had in one hand fell to the floor as she used the fork she had in the other as a potential weapon.

"It's 2 am. Why are you up?" Jason asked again

"And why are you here?" she crossed arms over chest, pouting, eyeing him up and down, still in his Red Hood gear "shouldn't you be patrolling?"

"I was in the neighbourhood. Saw a light here and came to check on you, you're welcome."

"Well as you can see I am perfectly fine, so you can go back to whatever you were doing....." she turned around towards the sink and resumed her cleaning fit. At 2 am. Jason's eyes travelled around the counter, crammed with dinnerrware she was frantically washing. Something was definitely wrong.

"Y/N" he spoke softly

"What?" she snapped, harsher than intended and the sound of her own voice made her sigh and rub the forehead "I told you I'm fine."

"Come with me" he tossed her the spare helmet lying on the shelf, nearby and she involuntarily caught it. At the same time he threw away his Red Hood helmet and jacket and changed it into civilian counterparts.

'Where.....?

"Just come with me" he grabbed her hand and practically dragged her out, into his motorcycle, forcing her to sit behind him. "Just hold on tight, all right, sweetie?"

They were speeding throught Gotham's streets, Jason focused on the road and Y/N's embrace on his waist. She was having an episode, he could tell. And damn the patrol, she always came first to him. So he dropped everything to just get her into the top of the highest building in Gotham. To get some perspective.

"Jay, why are we here?" she asked, voice trembling, looking down at the city, filled with lights "Wow. I never thought Gotham could actually look this beautiful. But still, why are we here?" she slightly moved away from the edge of the building. It was high and she did not want to fall off.

"When I came back from the death" he started, taking a place next to her reaching for her hand and intertwining their fingers together "I had flashbacks of what happened with Joker. Heavy ones. And the only way I knew how to deal with them was running away. As far as possible. So this...." he waved his hand around "was my safe place. Somewhere I came to calm down, somewhere peaceful and quiet and out of everyone's reach. No one knew about it, so they were out of my hair."

"But now I know....."

"You're the exception to every rule I set for myself."

"Jason....." she muttered, moving closer to him, resting head on his shoulder and feeling his arm sneak around her waist.

"And then you came into my life and became my anchor." he continued "I didn't need this place anymore. Look, baby, I know what it feels like to relive the past, all right? And I don't want that for you. So that's why we are here. To get away." he kissed top of her head affectionately "I won't let anyone hurt you, hope you know that. Even if that means saving you from yourself."

"Jay....." she whispered again, tilting her head up and their gazes met.

"Yes, princess?"

"I love you....."

"I love you too, sweetheart."

TIM

"Bruce, please, please, don't make me attend the gala."

"cut it, Y/N. You are going. You are the only one that I can actually believe will not turn it into a circus show.

And just like that, poor girl ended up at the annual Wayne Gala, dressed up from head to toe, feeling like a kid in her mother's clothes. Pretending to be someone else, someone confident, elegant, laid-back and maybe a bit conceited. She was Wayne Enterprises top employees, she should have known better than to beg Bruce to cut her some slack.

Instead, she was doing rounds and rounds, talking to potential investors, trying to charm her way into their hearts. All with the brightest smile on her face. The smile that could never reach her eyes, which slowly started to give away how terrified she truly was. It was suffocating.

"If you'll gentlemen excuse me for a second." she grinned politely finishing one of her countless converstations "I need to go to the ladies room."

While the guest just nodded in understatement, Bruce was far from letting her get a break.

"Y/N." he appeared out of nowhere, grabbing her elbow "There's one more group I need you to charm, all right?"

"Bruce...." she whined "please...."

"Just this one. I promise, Y/N."

"All..... all right" she stuttered and putting on her proffesional face approached three older men standing by the window. At first, it was easy to cover up for her shaking hands and trembling legs but then one of her interlocutors used some ill-fated words which triggered memories from the past.

"What do you think about that Miss Y/L/N?"

"I......" she tried to form a sentence but it felt like someone punched the air out of her lungs and like the world was spinning. However, just one glance at the man in front of her told her he did not notice a thing. Damn it she was good at pretending. "I think....."

"I think it's a proposition worth considering, Mr Jacobs." a warming touch to her forearm, a soft voice in her ear and the sense of someone's calming presence next to her grounded her immidiately. She sighed deeply and Tim squeezed her hand reassuringly, almost like he was trying to say I'm here now. He noticed her symptoms even from the other side of the room.

"Mr. Drake. Such a pleasure to see you. I was just explaining to this young lady here......"

"Y/n is an exeptional mind. My father and I really trust her opinions so if she thinks it's something to invest it, we surely will. Now if you excuse us, I really need to take something up with my girl." his hand travelled up to her waist when he slowly led her out of the prying eyes of the guests to the more secluded part of the manor.

"Are you all right, Y/N" he asked sitting her onto the stool and handling her a glass of cold water which she gladly accepted, sipping on it.

"I'm better now." she smiled faintly "how did you know?"

"'Cause no matter how many people I was talking to tognight, my focus was on you. Like always" he looked down, cheeks a bit flushed with the confession. "I know about your triggers, I know you asked Bruce not to come here tonight and I just ......"

"Tim. Tim, look at me." he raised his head to face her, face turning even more red when she cupped his cheek gently and rested her forehead on his "have I ever told you how great detective you are?"

"I don't mind listening to it a couple more times." he leaned into her touch.

"I can keep telling you that all night if it means we don't have to go back there."

"I'm pretty sure the other members of the family can handle this for a while, don't you?" he smiled and leaned forward to close the distance between them.

DAMIAN

he's obviously aged up

Sounds of punching and kicking were echoing through the training room in the manor. Y/N was not the one to use it very often since she as far from strength workout focusing rahter of speed and flexibility, but being in a very complicated relationship with the youngest son of Gotham's richest came with some benefits. Like now, when she was struggling with her PTSD and anxiety hitting on her again. Being the fighter she was, she decided to hit back. Literally. By putting on leisurewear and stand against some virtual opponents. Little did she know that there was a quiet figure standing behind her back watching her every move. She should have sensed him, she was trained it that, but once her mind started working against her it was like she was transferred to another reality. Only her and her memories, pain, fear and all the bad emotions. Maybe that was why despite being in quite good shape she was panting, sweating and shaking more than usual.

"I hate you...." she cried kicking another AI opponent "I.... I hate you...." single tear flew down her cheek but she not let any other appear.

"I don't think they care about your hatred" Damian smirked moving towards the center of the room "you should really control your feelings here Y/n."

"You don't know...."

"Oh I know. I know you are way to much in your head right now."

"Do you?" she scoffed, standing in the power position dead set on not letting him intimidate her.

"I do." he nodded, turning a bit more serious "And I mean it, if you don't get your ass out of your head you are going to hurt yourself. Or worse, get hurt. Or, the worst, humiliate yourself."

"Watch your words, Wayne!" she clenched her fists, anger seething through her every pore.

"Look at yourself" he smirked "wrong posture, overwhelmed with feelings, missed punches. Don't you think you should have just stick to being ordinary girl? Batman seems like too high tresholds for you."

"Is that what you think?" her eyes widened. Damian was not exactly known for his social skills, but she thought he might treat her differently. After all they were toghether, so why? And to add up to it, they were alone. There was no need to show this side of him, it was Y/N who he was talking to. And those words of his hurt. Probably more than she wanted to admit. And it made her face the reality or rather crash with the reality. Was she really not good enough? Subconciosly she started to recall all the latest things she did to help Batman and Robin and could not remember any mistakes. "Dami?"

"Of course not." he spoke calmly approaching her.

"So why did you say it?"

"Tell me where are you?"

"What?" she frowned. He did not make any sense.

"Where are you?" he repeated, eyes fixed on her confusied face

"At the manor?" she hesitated, not sure where all of this was going.

"And where were you a couple minutes ago?"

"Oh....." now she realised. What he said and most importanly how he said it, had one single purpose - bring her back. Make her think rationally and logically. And it did.

"Look, Y/N. I've been trained by the assassins, I'm still learning about.... you know....relations. But I try, all right?"

"I know you are. And I ....."

"Let me finish" he cut her off. "If there's anyone I want to learn with it's you, ok? But for now, I can only do as much as helping you ground. By being harsh sometimes. And.....I'm sor...." he stuttered "Nah, I'm not gonna say it."

"I don't want you too" she laughed wholeheartedly "that would be so out of character."

"You want to spar with me, Y/L/N?" he asked handling her some weapons and gently brushing his fingers over hers.

"Coming from you it sounds like a proposal."

"Don't get ahead of yourself Y/L/N".

[robiinurheart33]

(TW for major panic attack, small s3lf harm and intrusive thoughts) - clicks for Palestine

Anyone who takes a good look at Ghost can probably guess he isn’t the most mentally healthy person.

Okay, he lied. No one would look at him long enough to actually take a good look before looking away in fear.

So why the hell are so many people annoying him today?

Look. He isn’t usually a very angry guy. Ghost is more like a combination of all his traumas and defence mechanisms and depression with anxiety all wrapped up in a scar-filled muscle tank. He does not get angry easily. He’s trained for that.

But fuck, when everyone is somehow getting on all his nerves at once, Price demanding paperwork, Gaz being way too fucking patient with him, and Soap whining all the god damned time. Jesus. Christ. Give him a bloody break already. He hasn’t drank water or eaten anything today, and his head is light and his brain feels like soft tissue scrunching up in preparation for a killer migraine. His boots are too tight, his mask suffocating him, his dozens of knives and guns and whatever the hell he keeps in him, he’s feeling every single minute detail and it’s driving him up the fucking wall. Who the hell decided all the lights be white?? God, his eyes burn. He probably hasn’t blinked properly in a while. His jaw and teeth hurt from clenching them, and ghost can practically feel his shoulders turning into giant boulders.

Ghost wants to crawl into a hole and die. Well, he already did do that, didn’t he? That wasn’t funny. He grimaces, sucking in a big breath as he pinches the bridge of his nose. Pull it together.

His thoughts are all over the place right now, and he can’t focus on one thing at a time. He needs to do a hundred things at the same time, and another part of him is reminding himself how dehydrated he is. He wants to choke the living hell out of his brain. Able to kill hundreds of people but unable to escape the confinements of his own mental stability. Ghost almost huffs at that. So you use comedy as a coping mechanism under stress? The words of his shrink suddenly ring through his mind, and ghost wants to bash his head into the wall and pull out all his hair.

Okay, okay, okay. Stay focused. First thing is to get back to his room, finish paperwork, drink and eat then sleep. As simple as that. Nothing else. Work, eat, sleep. Okay. He can do that. Terrifying lieutenant reduced to some guy who can’t even take care of his basic necessities. How can you even take charge of thousands of lives on the field? Ghost bites the inside of his cheek hard, tasting metal flow into his mouth immediately. SHUT THE FUCK UP. He feels like his skin is wrapped in cling wrap, pulling tighter and tighter, until his skin burns and he wants to scratch on every cell on his body until the feeling goes away. This is quite literally his own personal purgatory. Is he dead? He hopes he is.

Ghost slams open the door to his room, and winces at the loud sound that happens. He closes the door a little more carefully, his fingers trembling and even the subtle “click” of the door echos through his head and he wants to melt into the floor and die. Ghost presses the heel of his palm into his eyes and watches the sparks flutter behind his eyelids, until the pressure relieves some of the tension, until it almost hurts, and his breathing somehow soothes slightly. He wasn’t even aware of how hard he was breathing. His chest itches, and Ghost scratches at it, surprised by the dull pain that etched through his ribs. He rips off his gloves and throws them onto the floor, like a child throwing a tantrum. His father’s words plague him, and a cold sweat starts to break out.

It all boils to a point, and Simon throws his mask off, hands trembling and shaking and he doesn’t know what to do how to get rid of this how does he function, and he has work, work, work and there is no time at all and he’s paralysed by the thought of choice, and he’s standing in the middle of his room, face flushed and panting. His shaking hands raise slowly and he grabs onto his hair and yanks. He gasps and grinds his teeth together and it hurts. It hurts, and it’s making his brain feel sharper, and his eyes are slowly blurring. It hurts, and he doesn’t let go. Energy thrumming beneath his skin, and his nails sink into his forearms, and he scratches, scratches, scratches, it hurts, and he scratches, scratches, scratches, and there is nothing that can save him, and he scratches.

It hurts.

He hurts.

It’s good to see you again, Simon.

A sinking feeling explodes in his gut and his mouth opens, jaw limp and he doesn’t know what’s happening. He pants, and it hurts. He falls to his knees, face plummeting into the foot of his bed, and it hurts. Tight, tight, and with fumbling hands and skin and blood under his fingertips he unbuttons his jeans, throws over his shirt and lay panting on the ground. It’s too close, and he unties and throws his boots across the room. Tantrum. His mind taunts. It’s not enough, it’s never enough, hurt. It hurts.

His fingertips tremble.

He almost sprains his ankle tumbling into the shower, turning the knob completely to the right. He slams his head against the wall tile, not even waiting for the water to heat up before stepping into the water. His back and shoulder hurt, and he tries rolling his shoulders back but to avail. He tries to compose himself, and he fails. There is simply no more energy left in him.

Simon shivers and slides down to his ass, closing his eyes and welcoming the boiling water with reverence. It burns, and he hurts, and he’s alive, and he feels horrible. He knows he hates sitting while showering. He knows that there is no way he can possibly get up now. He knows that this is the absolute worst way to deal with his attacks right now. He knows he should get help. He knows he should breathe.

Simon does none of that.

He cannot tell if the liquid falling down his face is water, blood, sweat or tears. He doesn’t think about it any further. He angles his face just slightly out of the water to take in a gulp of humid air. That’s one down now. He shudders yet again, could imagine the goosebumps break across his arms. One objective right now is to get clean. He breaths some more. Counts to 10. His body doesn’t listen to himself. Dirt scrapes across his knees, and it’s not real, none of it. A metal hook, rotting jaw, and blue eyes.

Soap. Johnny.

Simon opens his eyes.

There’s no dirt, there’s no hook, or wood, or fire, no smell of decomposing bodies, no gun or blood, no pats to his shoulder, no whispers, no tommy, Beth, Joseph, elizabeth Riley or Johnny, he’s alone.

Like he always knew he was.

Simon twitches his toes, and watches as it slowly curls up. One more down. he blinks, and both his feet curl up. Twenty blinks later, and his hands twitch, static twitching up his arms. Distinctly, he remembers that they react that way due to not getting enough oxygen into his body. Ten blinks later, and his hands curl up. He slides his fingers against his palm, clocking in the water slowly getting colder again. He makes his hand into a fist. Another slow ten, and he lays his palms flat against the shower floor, inhaling painfully before pushing himself up with a grunt, slipping slightly and slamming his shoulder into the shower wall. He wheezes, clawing at the wall to keep himself upright. It hurts. His head spins. He blinks.

Breathe.

His hands fumble for the water tap, clammy hands shutting off the water and suddenly it’s way too quiet.

That’s- shit, that’s even worse and Simon turns on the water again, not to have it beat down on his back but a small drizzle, just to keep it from being silent, to not remind him how alone he felt.

A beat. Then two.

Simon turns off the water again and steps out of the shower quickly. He grabs a towel and wraps it around himself, staring at the man in the mirror.

Simon blinks. So does he.

Breathe.

That’s enough. He has work to do. He opens the door and steps back into his room, changing quickly and ignoring the blooming bruise on his shoulder and forehead. He takes one last breath and looks at the balaclava thrown onto the floor. He has work to do.

Ghost picks up the mask.

[serial-killers-hope]

Hello ^^ would you mind writing a story with Ronin and an actual devil reader? It's fine if you don't want to!!!!

You’re wish is my command. ~ DP

TW / CW :

- Religious Implications

- Religious Trauma

- Blood

- Gore

- Cannibalism

- Murder

You have been warned.

Enjoy.

The Devil’s In The Name.

“Fuck!”

You cursed aloud, kicking at the puddle of water on this hell called Earth. You were placed here on account that you were one of the demons tasked with checking on Earth with an assigned angel. But of course, there was no angel in sight and you were stuck on Earth while it rained. The alley being the only safe haven around that you could possibly stay in.

Your tail flicked at the pelting rain, hiding under a cloak that you had come with. The only shelter for your shivering body which didn’t seem accustomed to the cold just yet. It made you shudder at the thought of never being able to find warmth.

What was odd however was the sound of thuds and steps in the direction of the entrance. Your eyes squinting to see someone with faux horns and a weapon of some sort draped across his shoulders.

Your eyes stayed fixated as he lowered the weapon onto an ‘enemy’who only seemed to sob and cry at the thought of being hurt. Soon, sounds of heavy bashing, guts spilled across brick with a thick crimson that pooled under them. White and grey brain matter splayed across in a beautiful display.

Grotesque and amusing to your slit eyes.

The man in question who had taken the persons life now stood straight, nudging the body with a spiked boot and a devious gleam in his eyes. It made your spine straighten as your tail seemed to wag even more.

The smell of blood taunted as you seemed to drool. Eyes fixated now on the body that laid against the wall in a visceral pool of their own blood.

“Hah…”

The craving was hard to resist, your tail hitting some tin trash can that you stood by.

“Huh?”

The man’s head snapped over at your direction, his eyes squinting as well to make out your shadow. Only seeing the tail wagging and some light that shone on your feet.

“Fuck, now I have to get rid of you?”

You immediately retreated back into the darker parts of the alley making the man groan in frustration as he kicked a nearby box and started stalking your way. Eyes seemingly scouring for you in any shadow.

Then he froze.

Sharp, piercing, orange eyes stared at him. Glowing in the dark with slits for pupils. Your breath seemingly heavy and needy for something he couldn’t quiet place. It was as if he immediately knew he wasn’t dealing with someone human.

“Hah? The hell…”

He approached with walls put up so high and thick, they could easily crush you if you even entered his presence. It made you shiver at the thought of his own flesh in your maw, metallic and heavy in taste.

“No…”

You murmured, making the man roll his eyes as he finally was close enough to make out some of your features.

Your eyes were orange, your body seemingly frail, clothes tattered, the cloak over you had been soaked from rain, and a red rosary hanging from your neck. It made him cringe.

You finally showed your full face, a single horn on the left of your forehead with the other seemingly broken off. It almost made him pity you… yet you were a demon he knew he had to learn more about.

“Jesus, I won’t hurt you. Don’t worry your pretty lil’ head.”

He chuckled, voice raspy and deep as he examined your switch emotions.

“I’m Ronin… you?”

You shook your head, eyes downcast as Ronin sighed and placed the bar against a wall. His hands moving to shrug off his jacket and drape it over your shoulders.

“… Why’re you being so…”

“Nice? Hah, I’ve had my fair share of shitty situations. God knows what he did to me of course.” Ronin’s laugh was now bitter and resentful, not of you but of God. “I’ll call you tangerine. It suits you.” He tapped under his eye, implying his own trauma and your color… it made you oddly comfortable.

“Oh.”

Ronin sighed, noticing your drool from a mile away as you stared at the body in the distance. “Well… eat?”

Your head shot up, tilting your head slightly with a confused gaze. Your hands trembling as you lowered your cloak and made your way out. His eyes following as he immediately ran when you could to eat.

Taking the body in your own hands and eating with loud crunches and moist noises. Bones breaking and meat tearing. After all, demons aren’t fed as well as angels or humans.

“Damn, you look hungrier…” Ronin laughed, deep and eerie. Making you shudder.

“Well… guess I found a new disposal method.”

[bakugosbratx]

yandere bakugou tries to cheer up his darkling?

Katsuki Trying to Cheer up His Darling

Warning: 18+ content. Yandere themes, gaslighting, manipulation, kidnapping infer, abuse, noncon referenced, etc.

Tags: @peachyquing @awilddreamerreads @milkthistletea @lanarist @quietlegends @bakugous-trauma @gazelle-des-pres @cherrykamado @thisbicc @miriobaby @sickchildren @bakugousbrat @vinny-likes-to-play21 @ssplague @ahbeautifulexistence @ebiharachan @fransuki @angie-1306 @rainne-cloud @nymphoheretic

• Katsuki would attempt to cheer up his darling. Attempt.

• Katsuki isn’t a patient man. He may gain a tiny bit as he gets older and more comfortable with his darling, but in general, Katsuki is impatient. Let’s not forget he also has a hard time understanding his own emotions. How do you expect him to understand his darling’s?

• He’ll try with talking to his darling. “What the hell is you mopin’ ‘bout?” He’ll grumble with folded arms, crimson eyes peering down at them. When his darling either gives him the silent treatment, or a bland answer, or even a truthful one, he’ll be quick to gaslight them.

• “You’re such an ungrateful brat. After all I’ve done for you and you have the nerve to be poutin’?” Katsuki scoffs as if this is supposed to automatically fix their attitude towards him. And when he learns it doesn’t work like that, he’ll try a different approach.

• Katsuki will come home with a stuffed animal, a treat, or something he thinks the darling will like. They’ll have to show gratitude then, right?

• At least, that is his hope, but when that doesn’t work, he’ll try other methods like fucking it out of his darling because dick fixes everything in Katsuki’s mind.

• His darling can deny it all they want but when they sing a melody of moans, that just confirms to Katsuki it is working and they are just giving him a hard time.

• But somehow, that doesn’t change their mind. A pout still stays on their face until all his tricks run out and he asked the question he should have asked before, “what the hell is it that you want?!” And when they answer honestly, they can expect a lecture on how ungrateful they are and a week in the basement with no food or water. But when he comes to see you, he expects you to be so grateful for his presence which will be rewarded with a nice bath, food, makeup sex, and cuddles

• And if the darling gives an answer Katsuki doesn’t want to hear — which will more than likely be the case — they can expect a lecture of how ungrateful they are, a week alone in a dark room, and no food or water. Then, you’ll have to lean on Katsuki when he frees you which will be a nice bath, cooked meal, makeup sex, and cuddles.

So, yeah. Katsuki may not be the best at comforting if they don’t respond the way he wants them too.

©bakugosbratx

• When the darling shows no gratitude, he’ll get even more angry, but he’s not done trying. He’ll do anything to see his darling smile. So, naturally, he’ll ask them what his darling wants.

• Katsuki will try to spend more time with his darling because they are obviously upset he is at work all of the time, right? And with all of that time means more time for Katsuki to pressure darling into sex.

• And when they say “no.” He will just do it anyway because dick fixes everything, right? The darling can claim they hate it, but as much as the darling moans, Katsuki thinks otherwise. Besides, what better way to get rid of that nasty attitude of theirs other than fucking it out of them.

[lazaruspiss]

sladedicktalia??????? i am LISTENING

there's like. 5 fics. im so starved. i think theyre so hot and funny together!! im obsessed. also this got long so im adding a readmore. whoops.

SlaDick: classic enemies to lovers. they may try to kill each other half the time but they respect each other more than anyone else. OBSESSED with each other, Slade knows he's weird about Dick and couldn't care less but Dick is so in denial about it. they could both give explicit consent but be so antagonistic about it that it becomes unclear if "yes i want to have sex with you" is actually code for "die right now" and i think that's beautiful.

SladeTalia: they fucked! in canon! there was some bullshit plotline where Talia tried to give Slade Damian and pretend he was his son instead! ex fuck buddies who show up just to make each other's lives harder bc they wanna fuck so bad it makes them have stupid brain. also they're both hot as hell. i'm weak for big strong milf/dilf idk idk.

DickTalia: LISTEN TO ME. TALIA WOULD TREAT HIM RIGHT. THEY BOTH KNOW HOW EMOTIONALLY DEVASTATING IT IS TO LOVE BRUCE. LISTEN TO M- ok aside from that. Talia is someone who tried so hard to be good, to choose to be kind. She loved Bruce because she saw how hard he tried to do good in the world. Her character has gotten considerably colder over time, in huge part due to a certain writer writing about her despite knowing nothing about her, but in universe i try and rationalize it as a growing cynicism stemming from both her father's gradually increasing cruelty and Bruce's failure to support her or commit to her or to even just respect her. She hasn't been shown to have very many people in her life who she can really trust and be close to. She used to have a good relationship with Ra's, she used to have Bruce, she's even lost Damian at this point. She feels like such a lonely character to me. And I think Dick would be able to see that, be able to understand it better than most. He's always had people who loved him, people he could turn to, but he's also ended up perpetually isolated for one reason or another. Dick and Talia both feel to me like characters who are so lonely the further they get in their lives. I could see a silent understanding there. The kind of people who would be able to find solace in simply sharing a space with each other. Neither of them like to talk about what they've been through, I think they'd like to have someone who just gets it. Trauma for trauma, you know?

SlaDickTalia: several angles available here.

1) Dick deserves some sexy older lovers who would wine and dine him and also rail him within an inch of his life and also kill for him. i am not immune to the aesthetics!! to the allure of a hot older duo double teaming their young spitfire partner!!!

2) corruption arc. u know u wanna.

3) Dick's fear of abandonment x the 2 most devoted people on the planet. if they were dating nothing bad would happen to Dick again, Slade and Talia just wouldn't allow that. smth smth, couldn't get rid of them if he tried <3

4) Bruce would hate it and that's always fun :3 not that that's hard tho, Babs is like the only one of Dick's partners that Bruce liked and that's bc he wants to keep it in the family.

5) healing.... sobs...... esp when it comes to feelings around parenthood. Those three have shit to work out and i think having some company would help.

6) They all need more people time but 2/3 of them don't get along with anybody so they're kinda stuck with Dick. that kid will forgive anybody if u bat ur eyelashes and behave well enough. He's also more likely to still see them as people despite everything they've been through, and when you're a military experiment and a semi immortal daughter of an immortal terrorist... It can be hard to find someone who looks at you like you still have a chance at humanity.

7) Slade and Talia playing a Cat Vs Dog type game with Dick in the middle. I think it's funny.

[dreamersbcll]

Could you write something where Tara is nervous and/ or irritable when Sam starts hanging out with some new girl. Just some good old fashioned codependency and possessiveness

“Joyous”

i’ll do you one better.

—————————————————————————

Tara wasn’t one to complain. She wasn't. When life threw the whole kitchen sink at her, she didn’t even make a peep. Nothing got under her skin because she wasn’t afforded the luxury to dwell on it all. She had to be on her toes, ready for the next attack; the next time, she would have to protect Sam.

But lately, Tara’s biggest problem was Sam’s new coworker. Haley. A tall, blond-haired girl with radiant eyes and an infectious smile. The girl stayed over one drunken night and just never left. It was like she was a permanent fixture in the sisters’ lives or at the very least, Sam’s.

She tried; she really did. But the final straw was finding the pair curled up in their bed together, sleeping soundly. Tara remembers taking the whole image in, her hands balled up and her eyes blurry with rage.

On the bedside table, there used to be a picture of the sisters’ smiling in front of the Blackmore University sign. It was replaced with a picture of Sam and Haley smiling together in their work clothes.

Every fucking picture, video, hell, even selfie together, the pair looked fucking joyous. As if Haley made the sunrise and the planet turn on its axis. As if Haley knew which smiles Sam was faking and how she preferred to be loved.

It fucking infuriated Tara.

This sixty-forty time split was too little for Tara. She needed one hundred percent of Sam’s time. She earned that time through years of fights, bloodshed, and mutually bonded trauma.

Haley wasn’t there for the last Woodsboro bloodbath, and she was nowhere near New York. She didn’t understand what it was like to be a Carpenter. And she wasn’t going to understand. Tara wasn’t going to give her a chance.

She needed to get Haley out of the picture. Tara wasn’t stupid. She knew her big sister was the sturdy frame, holding everyone around her up, and Haley was the temporary Polaroid picture that just wouldn’t get torn up.

Again, Tara tried. She really did. She tried to hang out with the girl and listen to her boring stories about being a financial advisor and how hard it was to commute from Princeton to Columbia. She had tried several dinners, shopping trips, and movie nights. None of it worked. The girl was still a parasite stuck to Sam’s back, draining her of the ability to love Tara.

And she was fucking tired of competing for Sam’s attention. Tara didn’t deserve this half-assed treatment. Sam chose her first and decided to love her first as well.

Sam was hers first. Not Haley’s. And she would never be Haley’s.

Tara figured that if there were no picture, there would be no frame. She needed to get rid of Haley quickly and quietly.

——

Stumbling back inside her apartment, she tried to breathe in and steady her breath. She couldn’t remember the last time she had run six entire city blocks, as she wasn’t in shape for it.

Leaning against the door, she tilted her head back, eyes closed in concentration. Her blood ached with exhilaration, her chest fluttering with joy. She didn’t realize how cathartic it was to release her emotions like that.

But Tara forgot to check if Sam was home, so when the kitchen light flickers on, she knows she’s caught.

Opening her eyes, she made eye contact with her sister, who leaned against the kitchen door frame, her arms crossed, face stoic. Gritting her teeth, her face glistened with sweat, her eyes still wild with euphoria.

She was caught. But she wasn’t sorry.

Sam walked up to her, eyes raking over the disheveled image that was her baby sister. Braided hair was frizzy and tangled as if someone had yanked at them in distress. Blood smeared across one cheek, splatters flecked on blue jeans. Coupled with the torn t-shirt and blossoming bruises under the left eye, Tara had looked better.

Tara wasn’t going to apologize. She did what she had to do. She didn’t start the fight, but she damn well would finish it. Sam taught her that much.

Shoot them in the head, don’t stop until they aren’t moving. Never fuck with the daughter of a serial killer. Or the sister of one.

She pushed off the door, getting in Sam’s face, daring her to tell her that what she did was wrong. Begging Sam to make a move, force Tara to feel sorry for taking out the girl that took her spot in the bed they shared.

Instead, Sam did neither of those things. She clicked her tongue in disapproval, reaching over and rubbing the blood stain off Tara’s cheek. Tara leaned into the touch, still watching Sam’s eyes. Her face was stony, but her eyes sparkled with love and approval.

Tara grinned wide, knowing she had Sam wrapped around her finger. She smugly crossed her arms over her chest, letting Sam wipe the blood off her face.

Breaking the silence, Sam spoke one sentence.

“Did you make a scene?”

Tara shook her head, the grin making her face ache in glee.

“No. You taught me not to. I did what you showed me. And I did it so well,” she purred, enjoying the way Sam’s breath caught in her throat.

Her sister then smiled back, a real Cheshire cat grin. She pulled Tara in for a hug, the two melding into one another. Tara breathed a sigh of relief into her sister’s chest, her heart bursting with love at how gently Sam touched her.

“Took you long enough, honey. I wasn’t going to wait any longer for you to end it,” Sam hummed, kissing her head.

Tara rolled her eyes but still clung to her sister, her smile a permanent fixture for the rest of the night.

She was the original photo. Nobody fucks with the original.

[harlequinoccult]

hey there, this isn't rlly an ask as it is a ramble so uuh feel free to ignore it!

i usually play IFs by picking an oc of mine and deciding to put them into Situations. i have like 3 ocs that basically were born by me constantly playing IFs a certain way. the reason im saying this is bc while stalking browsing your tumblr, i realized smth i found quite amusing, which is that OD has a very similar backstory/traumas to one of my ocs, except both of them ended up w pretty much opposite personalities-

im gonna call my oc by his alias to make things fair, so Vulpine it is (he has a whole thing w foxes its not important). Vulpine also usually grows up without parents or any family really, basically raises himself as a street rat, has one HELL of a teenagehood, gets arrested at LEAST once, basically becomes an alcoholic from ages 14-20, has religious trauma that makes him question his worldview and changes his beliefs completely, is an aggressively stubborn motherfucker... but as he grows up he kind of "mellows out", in a way.

in slsq terms, ig his personality would mainly be apathetic with caustic (is that the name for the aggressive personality type?) tendencies. but mostly he's just sighing and trying to get on with this without dying. he stops drinking and using drugs completely in his adult years, mostly due to his never ending paranoia (he cant defend himself well enough if he's inebriated, and he learned that from experience). becomes much more patient as a person, much more set on his boundaries, and ultimately more of a "functional member of society". he's a bit of a cleaning freak, knows abt 8+ languages just bc he likes studying, is a MASSIVE fucking nerd who would live in university if he could. he probably was working on getting a doctorate or smth when Carter came along and just fucking ruined his life

on the surface, Vulpine and OD have... p much nothing in common. one of them is a stoic bitch with a dry sarcastic humor and a voice so deadpan you can barely tell what emotion he's feeling unless he gets truly angry (which is a surprisingly hard thing to accomplish), and OD is... well. it's OD.

but i do feel like there's some sorta kinship there, past their obvious differences. Vulpine is no stranger to extreme trauma and the habits someone would develop to try and overcome it in some way. he's no stranger to being shackled for most of your life and fighting so hard to get rid of those chains you end up changing yourself almost completely. he wouldn't try to "fix" OD bc he knows that's not how this works, but... he'll try his damn best to at least give them some stability. make sure they eat well every day. make sure they sleep on a proper bed and not just on a mattress on the floor.

the kind of absolute devotion and loyalty Vulpine can develop for someone... i can't wait to pair him up w OD and see what happens, ngl, i think their dynamic would end up being so interesting and change quite a bit the more they know eachother (from being mutually annoyed at eachother's existence to... something else)

i had no one else to ramble abt this, and tbh i could talk abt Vulpine forever so ill cut it out here! thanks for reading this if you do, i am so hooked in this IF already its ridiculous. i hope you're having a good day/night!

Never apologize for rambles!! I LOVE hearing about peoples MCs/OCs!!!