#and this one doesn't have a lot of detail (or any detail tbh) so it looks more solid and fun i think

[xxgoldie]

Congratulations for your 100 followers!

May I request for Lighter (zzz)? As for the alphabets, it's A, J, M, N, and Y!

I hope it's not too much, anywho, once again, congratulations! Hope you have a great day/night <3

thank u sm! ofc lighter nation pulls up first hehehe

main event page - event masterlist

A: Admiration - what's something they admire in a partner? Lighter really appreciates someone patient and caring. Partially this is because its something he really needs; while he's not massively secretive about his past, it takes him a while to truly open up about the details and the way it still affects him, plus he kind of forgets to take proper care of himself, since he's used to viewing himself as a means to other people's ends. But its also because so much of his life has been about violence, so he really admires a shift from that, and feels extra in love whenever he sees that gentle care in you, even if it's not directed to him.

J: Jealousy - do they get jealous easily? what are they like when they're jealous? Lighter is pretty secure in your relationship, so he's not gonna get jealous of your friends, and as long as no one's making you uncomfortable, he's not even particularly fussed if someone else asks you out, just keeping a protective eye on you while you reject them in case they take it badly and he has to step in. THAT BEING SAID, he does get possessive if someone tries to flirt with you, especially if they're subtle enough about it that you don't really notice. Directly shooting their shot is one thing, he can respect that, but those flirty little compliments and lingering touches are encroaching a bit too far on his territory. Suddenly he's glued to your side and his hand seems permanently attached to your waist, if the person doesn't know who he is (or doesn't seem to care), he'll drop it into conversation or take his jacket off so they see his scarred, muscled arms, making eye contact with a look that just screams "i dare you to try". Also, he may not get jealous of people, but he's lowkey the type to get jealous of like. pets and plushies. sees you cuddling your plushies or petting a cat and his thought process is just "aww cute. i wish that were me tbh. wait we're dating, that should be me." and he's well aware its a bit of a silly thought to have so he tries to play it off but the way he glares at whatever's taking up your affection is so obvious. He'll pretend he doesn't know what you're talking about if you tease him about it, so long as it works and he ends up in your arms with your hand threading through his hair.

M: Melt - what can you do to fluster them and make them melt? I've had this headcanon for a while that Lighter likes to tease you a lot so you don't get the chance to try to fluster him first, because it's honestly a little crazy how easy it is. Any sort of heartfelt compliment has him losing his words for moment, particularly if you tell him you feel safe around him. But if you want to see him properly flustered and embarrassed, you just have to be unapologetic and bold about your attraction to him. If he catches you staring, he will tease you about it, but just double down on it (e.g. "enjoying the view?" "oh, absolutely", or "take a picture, it'll last longer" "amazing idea actually" and genuinely pulling out your phone) and you have the upper hand in an instant, his ears go red and he tries to think of something smart to say back but he's short-circuiting a little. Poor guy absolutely cannot take what he dishes out.

N: Nicknames - what nicknames / petnames do they have for their S/O? what are their favourite nicknames for you to call them? He likes most variations of babe/baby, tho he uses baby most often. Also likes to use compliments as nicknames, lots of "hey gorgeous" and "pretty girl / pretty boy". When it comes to what you call him, he particularly likes if you call him "love" or some variation of it, like "my love" or "lover". Also, calling him "my champion" with a pout is like a fast-track ticket to him doing whatever you want.

Y: Yearning - how easily do they miss their s/o? what are they like when you're away? He's the kind of guy to always have his partner on his mind, little things just make him think of you. He's always taking photos of cute animals or pretty sunsets or other things he sees to send to you, and when he runs errands in the city he'll come back with lots of little trinkets and treats for you - he doesn't even actively look for them, it's just second instinct for him to think "oh they'd like this" and pick it up. However, I think it takes a bit longer than most for him to really miss you to the point it's a problem. Like, sure, he would always love to see you even more often, but he gets that sometimes life gets in the way and its quite often his gang duties that are keeping you apart, so it takes a little more for it to start genuinely affecting him. When it does, though, he's basically checking his phone for any messages from you - it's not just that he thinks of you in everything, he's actively looking for random reasons to text you. He'll be extra fierce in fights, trying to wrap everything up asap so he can get back to you. But if the gap really can't be shortened, he instinctively starts bringing you up in every conversation. Your name on his tongue helps fill the void a tiny bit, but it's lowkey just "ow, i hurt my hand!" "(Y/N) has hands..."

[koko-canie]

❥⠀Orin Ayo Headcannons　｡｡｡

Warnings　𓎟𓎟　 Mentions of Death regarding Drug use , Gun Violence , Body horror , Mentions of abuse , Cult mention ( obv ) , Kidnapping , Trauma etc

NOTES : Nothing is explained in super graphic detail of course but there's alot of dark themes here , its a horror mod so yeah. also some of these headcannons are personal !! don't take these seriously its just my interpretation

DREAM / LIE :

Lie isn't an exact "personification" of someone's trauma , but really an unnamed corpse who like the others is a victim of Tab's cult.

He's called "Lie" by the others as they do no know his actual name nor origins.

he has no memories of his past life

Lie also doesn't talk either , not that he isnt able to but he simply remains quiet for the most part.

Nonbinary , but only bc they cant tell what his gender is ( however he still uses he / him )

HART :

Her and James ( along with Kurt ) have a sibling like bond , James lets her sit around him

is able to remember her past but often doesn't like to.

Before Death she used to be a dancer ( ballet dancer )

while she cant speak very well she does whisper , you can hear her when its very quiet

BAYLEE :

He's very sarcastic but given he's a statue head bust its not surprising

While he isn't chatty , Baylee may make one-off comments or remarks to anyone he happens to see

he cannot move at all , others have to help him move

he has no memory of how he died , nor why he's even in a the cult in the first place

his face being covered in clay prevents him from making expressions but he can change his tone of voice

HUE :

in my mind , his design is different ( /glowingparasite's design of hue is what he looks like in my mind bc his actual design sucks poo poo )

Like a Tiger , he makes a "chuff" sound when pleased or content

he also knocks a lot of stuff over just because ( dudes a huge house cat tbh )

When he talks it sounds more like growling

James sometimes tries to pet hue when he isn't looking ( James is a softy for animals )

PROTOTYPE 3 :

legit cannot speak , only uses sound effects to communicate

i don't have much for her sadly

ETHAN :

He could play just about any instrument

He has a tenancy to move his fingers around when standing ( he's got the tism )

Despite being blind , he still remembers how to play most instruments by memory

Type of dude to say "Wowzers" and "Aw shucks" unironically

has a lisp

HETY :

was originally a pretty devoted followers of the cult , when she died Tab decided to bring her back to life.

very mentally unstable

She does have a body under the mass of ferrofluid and wires , but its very hard to notice and see

she is able to use these wires to grab things and attack ( she attacked lilac so yeah )

Reasoning for attacking iliac was due to her being a big fan but lilac ultimately rejected seeing her because of her sneaking back stage without permission. this lead to Hety attacking lilac.

DOUGG :

His inclusion to the cult was simply because Tab didn't like him. Dougg didnt actually do anything.

before death he was a gambler

he's a pretty sneaky dude though , sometimes playing pranks on the others for the hell of it

Likes to mess with James because of his reactions

AZ-TF :

When they talk it sounds like two people speaking at once

AZ has the deeper voice and TF has the higher one

they have no memories of their past

They often bicker about small things

STANLEE :

Before his death , he was actually friends with Andrew ( and even lived with him for a while )

When Stanlee is sober he is surprisingly well spoken and actually pretty smart

His addiction developed at 21

Due to his now ferrofluid blood , he cannot become sober and is forever high

he struggles with his memory

ACHETURE ( FLICKERR ) :

Can communicate though words on its screen

despite being a TV , its still sentient

Acheture still retains its memories before death

KURT :

He's often around James or Hart as he doesn't trust the others. ( its like a sibling dynamic )

Originally he was very scared of James , this changed over time

He also likes to keep the duck around for comfort

Kurt likes to draw to show how he's feeling

His vision is very blurry

CRATZ PURR :

Oldest within the cult in terms of age

he's just everyone's grandpa

he's a nervous wreck however and tends to get overly worried about the others

his voice sounds sorta autotuned with an organ

LILAC :

She's a lesbian ( sorry but i cannot see her dating a man , i don't ship her with neester at all :/ )

she still has her guitar but she cant play it

She considers Ethan to be a little brother

she frequently argues with James due to him being rude to everyone

Before her death she was very influential in the goth rock scene

JAMES :

I already wrote some headcannons for him in this post but ill add more

he struggles with empathy and often disregards others alot

despite this however he is very nice to Kurt and Hart

he also likes the duck

DERICK :

He isn't able to speak , like at all

i don't have anything for him srry

DUCK :

She's basically the cults pet

James is responsible for feeding her

KASKI :

Bi disaster

Often makes internet references that nobody understand ( aside from Baylee and Ethan )

Meows at people ( vocal stim )

has attempted to plat games on prototype 3 before

The hands on her body are tattoos but they can move

ANDREW :

He's a very slow talker , his voice is also very low

He often sings sea shanties to himself

when alive , he lived along the coast. from there he sailed off for fun.

at some point he met Stanlee when he was alive and even let him live with him. the two were very very close. however one say Andrew would get high and fall off his boat , resulting in his death. this had lead Stanlee's addiction to worsen and lead to his death too.

Andrew often stays around Stanlee within the cult , even if Stanlee cant quite remember him. ( doomed yaoi oops )

[wasyago]

we're at it again🕺

[sskk-manifesto]

Bungou Stray Dogs: Dead Apple and how “ability users” (opposite to “normal people”) learning to accept themselves through the acceptance of their own abilities is a queer metaphor of acceptance of own's sexual orientation and gender: an essay by me

[reidmania]

inbetween | spencer reid

good riddance x spencer reid one shot series master list

summary ; after months over talking over email, you and spencer finally meet in person.

warnings ; reader & spencer fall in love over emails, meeting in person, insecure reader, insecure spencer, worries about not being enough, pretty much just pure fluff tbh.

an ; in between yall. this song. this is the first oneshot in the good riddance x spencer reid one shot series!! while i waiting for the poll to finish!!

part one, part two, part three

‘I just can't come between 'em, they got their own thing I wish he'd stop pretendin', he won't let his phone ring. For more than a couple seconds, oh, I think maybe two. two hearts just fallin' in and out of love for somethin' new. ‘i wish that you could see 'em, their faces lighten up their past is cold and empty, they know it's been enough of waitin' on somebody, someone who doesn't care but he knows her name, she knows he'll always be there’

<>

The email rang up at exactly 5:30, exactly when you expected it to. You were sitting at your desk at work, knees pulled to ur chest as you spun on the desk chair. Your coworkers paid no mind to your antics, after working in the safe office for years, with each other. They were used to it by now.

You chewed at your lip as you refreshed your email when the clock changed to exactly 5:30, a wide smile dawned your face when you read the email, you heart ached with longing as your eyes traced over the words on the screen, your stomach tightening and your heart clenching.

Sent from dr.spencerreid@gmail.com at 5:30pm

Hi.

I don’t know when this will send because I’m writing it while on the jet, probably as we get lower and more towards landing, I’ll spare you the scientific details. We only got back from a case this morning, early. Which is why it has taken me so long to reply. Im sorry.

We got a case in Maryland, which I remember you telling me, is where you live. I know I should probably just ask for your phone number but I kind of enjoy the emailing thing. It’s a lot less nerve racking because I can try to pass it off as professional, even though a lot of the time our conversations aren’t.

I actually don’t think we have ever had a professional conversation. Which is a good thing. I really enjoy our conversations no matter what we are talking about. I really enjoy talking to you.

I hope this isn’t too forward but I wanted to know if theres any chance I could see you while I’m in Maryland for this case. I don’t know when it would be or how long I’d be able to see you for, but I do really want to see you. If thats okay with you.

I guess I should give you my number, so you know I’m not some creepy old man. That would be ironic since I work at the FBI and my job is to stop people like that… I don’t know.

Heres my number, 023387677

Love, Spencer.

Your stomach tightened at the idea of seeing him in person. You never admitted it, but you knew he wasn’t an old man, you knew exactly who he was. You made the decision to google his name 6 months ago, when the two of you first started emailing back and forth after he accidentally sent a work email to the wrong person and you replied. It started as just telling him he had sent it to the wrong person, then he thanked you and apologised and made a joke and then the conversation just flowed.

You had been having conversations with Spencer Reid for six months and you felt like you knew more about him than you did yourself. He told you about his day, and about things he had been through, He opened up to you about his addiction and his mom and you opened up to him about your own trauma and issues.

Spencer Reid was your best friend and you had never met him. You had never even heard his voice. You only had seen his face on google when you searched up ‘Spencer reid FBI’ and a photo came up, he looked younger than you assumed in it, seeing the photo was from a few years ago. You felt slightly bad since you knew he could google you and probably come up empty handed — you had the upper hand.

You look at the clock as it inches closer to six o-clock when you finish work. A boring office job, you often complained to Spencer about. It was ironic since his job literally traumatised him, and yet you complained about the boring desk job, although he never ever compared, he would listen and comfort you after a bad day no matter what, just like you did for him.

You don’t reply to the email he sent as you typed the number he sent into your phone, saving the contact under ‘spence’ The nickname that had developed only weeks into the two of you talking. You send him a text, letting him know it was you, saying hi.

“Phone.” You hear your boss, warning you about using your phone at work, you lift your head an apologetic smile on your face as you close your phone, placing it face down on your desk as you close your email and return to your work after muttering out a sheepish, ‘Sorry!’

Spencer is sitting in a conference room of the police station in Maryland. He didn’t know it but he was only two blocks away from the office you worked. He never usually cared to check his phone while working — nothing could be as important as the case.

Until you, until now.

He found himself hanging out to feel the buzz in his pocket, he found himself checking his phone just in case maybe he missed the message. Just in case you did message.

He also checked his email a lot.

“Whats up with boy wonder?” Derek asked as he spun a chair to sit on it backwards, resting his arms on the back of the chair as he looked around at the other team members. Spencer focus on anything other than the case.

“He gave mystery girl his number” Emily said, patting Spencers shoulder softly to get his attention as she walked past him, placing a coffee down in front of him. Spencer noticed how it was his normal order — despite the fact lately he had been getting your order, after he found out what it was. It made him feel a little bit closer to you.

“Oo, Okay lover boy.” Derek hummed approvingly, raising his eyebrow slightly as he looked down at the boy. Spencer sighed as he let back in his chair, tossing his phone on the table as he checked to get no message. “Nothing yet?” Emily asked, knowing Spencer had been stressing since he sent the email on the jet, nearly two hours ago.

He didn’t know it hadn’t even delivered until a few minutes ago.

“Shes probably just busy” Spencer muttered as he checked his watch for the time. 5:33pm, you’d be at work.

Derek shared a look with Emily, both with teasing smiles on their faces. They had watched Spencer obsess over the girl for the past 6 months, even after he tried to hide it for the first few. He did a horrid job, they all noticed him smiling at his computer and typing away more often than ever, they noticed his focus slight adverted. It took a bit but they eventually got it out of him when you didn’t email him back for a week and he was going insane with worry that maybe you were ghosting him, or that you were hurt.

He confided in his team, you emailed him a few days later saying your wifi went down and none of your emails were going through. He was instantly relieved.

His phone buzzed on the table, 5:35pm. His hand instantly reached out for his phone. His eyes widened and his lip twitched upwards as he read the message that lit his screen.

“And lover boy is in” Derek whispered to Emily, loud enough that Spencer could hear that only ended up in Spencer sending him a glare, before typing out a reply and sending it, asking to call you tonight when he got finished.

“Alright, We got a lead” Hotch said entering the room.

You leant against the back of your head board, your hair wet and dripping down the back of your neck as you waited nervously for call to ring through your phone. You were almost terrified of what the conversation might hold. You were glad you were calling before you agreed or disagreed to meeting him, you could feel out whether or not it might be awkward or not.

You almost jumped out of your skin as your phone started ringing, anxiety pooled in your stomach as your skin flushed hot, causing the drops of water on the back of your neck feel as if it was burning the skin. You reached out for your phone that rested on your bed side table, answering the call.

“Hi.” You muttered out a breath of air. You couldn’t even help but smile as the realisation dawned on you. You were talking to Spencer. Finally, actually talking to him.

You heard a harsh breath on the other side of the phone before some shuffling. “Hold on” He mumbled out, you stomach fluttered at his voice as your teeth sunk into your bottom lip as you bit back a smile.

“Okay.” You said, you heard some more shuffling before the sound of a door closing, then a creek. And then a breath.

“Hi” He settled on, you sat up a bit, crossing your legs as his word came out almost breathy and nervous. It made your chest thump against your ribcage so much it ached. “Sorry— I should’ve waited till I was in my hotel room to call, I was excited— Sorry” He said.

You could hear the nerves in his voice and all it did was make your cheeks beat a rosy hue. “It’s okay. I was nervous” You admit softly, you try to hide the slight embarrassment in your voice but it fails you as your words come out small.

You hear him chuckle. You think the sound genuinely makes your mind fall empty of any coherent thoughts. “You don’t have to be nervous” He spoke so softly as if his words were an exhale he had been holding in.

“But I am” You muttered.

“Me too.” He said honestly. You found comfort in the fact he cared enough about this interaction to be nervous about it. You went to run your hand through your hair but paused with you felt the coldness — it was still very wet from your shower.

“Good” You sighed out, voice almost a whisper. You didn’t know why you were speaking so quietly, there was no one else in your house. There was no reason to be as quiet as you were.

“Is good that I’m nervous?” Spencer asked, you could hear the teasing in his voice. It made your head spin and the words get caught as you shook your head, before remembering he couldn’t see you.

“Yes- No- no. No.” You muttered out, “Its uh- Its not good that your nervous— I- Its just good that you care” You scrambled out, stuttering over your words as you grew flustered. It made you want to turn into your pillow and scream.

You heard him laugh, making your face screw up. “Shut up.” You muttered out as it didn’t take a genius to figure out he was laughing at you scrambling over your words, your free hand came up to cover your face as your cheeks felt on fire.

“No- Im sorry. Im sorry. Of course I care, you know I care” He said softly as he collected his laughter, his voice dripping honesty for a moment as he spoke genuinely in a way that made your knees feel weak — Thank god you weren’t standing. You were silent for a moment as a smile dawned on your face.

“Tell me about your day.” He requested gently. You heard some more shuffling you could only assume he was getting comfortable in bed. You pictured it and it made your stomach burn with longing. Wishing it wasn’t just an image in your head.

And you did, you told him about your day and he told you about yours; the conversation flowed simply and sweetly from then on. He teased you whenever you stuttered over your words, you could hear the smile in his voice as he spoke.

You and him spoke until your voice was quiet and drowsy with sleep, until your eyes were fluttering shut and you went unresponsive for a moment before he asked if you were asleep and you would wake up to the sound of his voice, muttering out a no, to which he would chuckle, and tell you to go to sleep.

When you fell asleep, he waited ten minutes to make sure you were really asleep before hanging up. His heart full as he fell asleep smiling.

Sorry I fell asleep. If i didn’t throw you off completely and you still want to see me, im free any day after 6, when i finish work.

Spencer smiled at the message. The acceptance. You were accepting meeting him, seeing him. He couldn’t fathom the idea of anything you doing ever throwing him off. You had wiggled your way into his chest months ago, and you stayed consuming every part of him everyday since. He didn’t see that changing any day soon, or ever.

He sent you an address to a bar Derek suggested the team going to after work. He didn’t know if maybe it was too forward, or might be awkward with his team there, but at least if it didn’t go well there was people around.

He closed his phone as he waited for your reply, his mind replaying the conversation he had with you last night, how sweet you sounded, how your laugh made his heart clench, how whenever you said his name or spoke a little louder he felt light headed, unable to focus on anything but you.

There was anxiety in his stomach when he realised the two of you never quite talked about what it all meant. What the months of conversation back and forth was. He realised he didn’t know what you wanted. What you expected.

Maybe you just saw him as a friend, maybe to you the conversation is nothing more than friendly. Honestly, if that was the case Spencer didn’t think he would be able to deny you of that. He would do anything to keep you in his life, even if it caused a slight ache in his chest. He had told you things he couldn’t imagine telling anyone else, he trusted you in a way he didn’t know possible, and it may be stupid, maybe naive, but Spencer didn’t care.

The way he felt for you took over any ounce of doubt in his mind, it overtook the insecurity welling in his mind, that maybe you wouldn’t like him, not the way he liked you.

He had never felt so much for a person. He had never felt so much point blank. He could hardly fathom you feeling for him near the amount he felt for you.

Your hands traveled over your jeans softly as your palms grew sweaty as you stepped inside the bar. Thanking the guy you held it open for you as he walked out. You were instantly overwhelmed by the amount of people, the music playing and the people chatting. You probably should have gotten changed first instead of coming straight after work but you were too nervous and didn’t want to give yourself time to dwindle in your insecurities then chicken out.

You manoeuvred your way through the people, quiet apologies leaving your lips as you looked around for Spencer, or anyone who looks like they might be an FBI agent.

What does an FBI agent look like? you thought, as you let out a sigh, finally getting out of the crowd of people as you got to the back of the bar, a lot more free of space. A few people around, standing at tables. You skimmed over for a moment as you tried to catch any glimpse of the boy that you could.

You heard your name, making you spin on your heels. You saw a dark haired girl smiling at you. Well that isn’t spencer.

“Yes?” You said, smiling at her as you tried to hide the anxiety building in your veins. Your hand coming to push hair off your face softly as you try to focus on the girl in front of you. She grins widely, “Spencer is over there, you looked like you were looking for someone…” She said, my smile instantly widened as you looked over to where she nudged her head.

your breath got caught in your throat as your eyes settled on him, the photo didn’t do him justice in any way. His hair was messy and slightly grown out, he was engrossed in a conversation with who you could only assume was Derek Morgan, who Spencer had told you about. His tie was crooked in his suit as he lifted his arm to sip the drink in his hand.

you tear my eyes away as you look at the lady who is smiling at you. “Happy with that?” She asks. It takes you a moment to recognise her as Emily, whom Spencer had also told you about. You can hardly put it into words how your chest feels like its gonna explode as your heart thumps.

“He is gorgeous.” You breathe out, shaking your head as words fail you, your eyes trail back to him for a moment to see him laughing, you see his head turn towards the door, as if he is waiting for you to walk through them.

Emily smiles, patting your shoulder softly, “Cmon Mystery girl” She said, you pay little attention to the nickname as she encourages you to walk towards the table with her. Your legs feel like Jelly with every step that you take, your stomach twisting in the familiar feeling of anxiety.

When she pauses at the table your breath hitches. “Oi Reid” She mutters, both he and Derek turns their head towards her, “Look who I found” She says softly, hand brushing over your shoulder.

Spencers eyes skip over to yours and you watch an emotion pull his features. An emotion you can’t quite place and it makes your stomach ache at the uncertainty, insecurity creeping up the back of your neck.

“Hi” You breathe out as you look at him. Theres a moment of silence before he is pushing away from the table and walking around to you. His arms around you the moment you are in reach and it makes your muscles tense slightly before relaxing completely in his hold as you wrap your arms around his neck, hugging him back.

Emily and Derek watch in amusement for a moment, smiling when they see the look on Spencer’s face. The one you couldn’t place the one they knew all too well.

He was in love.

He was in love before seeing you, he knew that but watching you stand there grinning at him made him all the more sure about it. His hand rested on your waist as he pulled back from the hug to look at your face.

“Hi” He whispered back.

You chewed at your lip at you bit back the wide smile that tried to force its way into your features. His hand traveled up to your face before he could stop it hand cupping your face gently.

You eased, leaning into his touch the warmth of his hand feeling gentle against the soft skin of your cheek. “Y-You- I- Hi.” He stuttered this time.

You grinned, “Cat got your tongue?” You ask, teasing him like he would every-time you stuttered over the phone. He just grins in response.

“No. You’re beautiful” He said, eyes dancing over your face, he looked at you like he was trying to memories every little detail. Your stomach tightens and your knees felt weak as the compliment left his mouth. You had been told that before, but it felt different coming from him. He said it with honesty and sincerity.

“So are you” You said back before hugging him tightly again. He didn’t complain at all, instead his arms fell tightly around your waist as he held you against him, as if he was scared that if he let go you would disappear.

The night went on, you stayed by spencer’s side, his hand on yours or around your shoulder gently as if he couldn’t get enough of the feeling of you being next to him. You never complained — you took it all as a compliment and leant into his touch.

“Are you cold?” Spencer asked as you and him walked outside of the bar, hand in hand. he noticed the way you shivered as the cold hair hit the skin of your bare arms. You turn your head to look up at him, the look in his eye enough to make your chest clench around the fat of your heart.

“A little” You admit. It was nothing you couldn’t handle, but spencer was instantly pulling off his suit jacket for you, slugging it gently over your shoulders as the two of you walked down the street. You paused in your steps as you looked up at him.

“Thank you.” You say.

“Its okay- I don’t want you to be cold” He said softly. You couldn’t help but smile at his kindness, but you shook your head. “For that too— But I meant, for asking to see me. Thank you for thinking of me when you heard about where the case was — for talking to me everyday. Thank you for being my best friend Spence” You said softly as you lean against your car as you and him stop in front of it.

His lip twitches upwards into a smile as his hand drops yours instead resting softly on your lips. “I always think of you.” He admits, eyes on yours.

Your breath gets caught in the back of your throat. “Spencer.” You say softly.

He looks at you, really looks at you. He is seeing you. He is seeing every little thing you have told him over the last six months, every little detail about you there was to know, and all he could think about was he wanted more, he wanted to know you more.

“Yeah?” He says, his voice a whisper.

You feel anxiety pool in your stomach as the question lingers on the tip of your tongue. There was a pull towards him you couldn’t ignore, the same pull you felt when you received his email, six months, 2 weeks and 3 days ago. You’d count the hours but you figured that was more his style.

“You can say no, I want you to know that” You said, you wanted to make it perfectly clear that his response to this was completely up to him and you didn’t want to feel pressured. “Can I kiss you?” You ask.

His lips are on yours before you can even finish the question. One hand of his travelling to the small of your back to bring you in closer while the other tangles in your hair, cradling the back of your neck. Your hands instantly cup his face as you press your lips against him. Your lips together saying more than words ever could.

This, right here, him, right now.

It was everything and more.

[lunahearts]

Soooo I read all of Dungeon Meshi in this past week and I have many thoughts bouncing around in my brain and I think the only thing to do with them is some AGGRESSIVELY CLOSE READING of a scene I wanted to come back to and try to understand better.

So: I want to talk about chapter 28

This entire section of the story is something I feel like I am going to want to come back to a lot, because its such a transitional time and I feel like there are a lot of themes/ideas that I wasn't fully aware of during my first reading, and stuff I missed because of that.

One of the biggest things I have been turning over in my head is... hey, what was UP with the Marcille/Falin bath scene? Maybe it was because I was already primed to pay attention to stuff with them going into the story, or because I had already seen a couple of panels out of context. In any case, it really kind of stuck out to me as being very short but also VERY intense, while also being... hard for me to define? Some part of the nature of the intensity felt like it was going over my head.

I wasn't sure that revisiting it would help with this right away, but to my surprise, it actually WAS a lot easier for me to follow and understand when I went back to it. So I want to just do a close reading of That Scene and some other parts of the chapter & context around it all, because I think it offers insight into Falin & her relationships, and what purpose this chapter serves within the story as a whole.

So first of all, I think it's interesting that the scene starts with Marcille bathing Falin.

It feels very caring in a more platonic, less charged way then what will follow.

Marcille goes from this caretaker mode to joining Falin in the bath, and then of course we get the first of The Panels

(as a small note, I only noticed when revisiting that Marcille is using the rest of her Kelpie soap in the bath. Isn't that just the most heartwrenching little detail. Augh)

Anyway, one of the first things I thought was interesting going back to this is how much it reminded me of the very different sort of intimacy that came just before it - when Laios and Marcille assembled Falin's bones.

This is such a beautiful and intimate sequence, and something about Marcille examining Falin, whole, after the fact... I can't imagine there are not some echoes of those bones in Marcille's mind. The action seems more startling/intense for Falin at first, and maybe part of that is because Marcille has already experienced this level of intimacy with Falin's body in a way Falin herself wasn't a part of.

This panel in particular I think is a summation of the difference in the experience for them. This looks like... near orgasmic for Falin tbh, and Marcille is very focused on the actual like practical part of what she's doing, seemingly completely unaware of the Effect she is having on Falin.

The whole short sequence is focused on this intimacy that Marcille initiated seemingly without fully being aware of what she was actually doing. And once Marcille is satisfied, she is also the one that ends it, sitting back in the bath and moving out of Falin's proximity. All on her own terms, and for her own ends.

HOWEVER... Falin doesn't just let things go.

Instead, she returns Marcille's attention. First, by asking after her wellbeing:

Marcille, of course, deflects (there will be a lot of that in this scene).

But Falin doesn't let it go.

Falin is not a confrontational person. She likes to keep the peace. In this context, and in context of the way that Marcille was the one to come into Falin's space initially, the way that Marcille controlled the initial intimacy... this is striking. I genuinely think that these three panels might convey one of the most assertive actions Falin (as herself) takes in the entire story. One of the only things that outdoes it is the fucking INCITING INCIDENT OF THE WHOLE STORY.

I'd also like to point out here that this action of Falin's also parallels her resurrection by Marcille & Laios. It's is also a forbidden magical action done to save someone(s) she loves, and its something she does TO them, that they are not fully aware/able to react to until its done.

Anyway, back to the bath scene. Falin is taking action here and asserting herself. And how does Marcille react?

She flips out!! She rejects it! She tells Falin that she isn't supposed to be acting like that.

It's a very distancing response from Marcille, and also one that puts her back in that caretaker mode from the start of the scene. She also puts even more distance between herself and Falin by sinking into the water.

Falin doesn't give up though! She continues to assert herself. She's okay, she is allowed to chose to do this.

And Marcille continues to push her away. It looks to me like she only starts to relax a little once she fits Falin into a role she can better define and control. You're a patient, you're recovering, I understand this fact and you don't. Let me take care of you.

But, for a third time, Falin pushes back.

I don't think it’s coincidence that this is where she opens her eyes. She asks directly about the thing that they have both been dancing around:

The resurrection spell. The fact that Falin KNOWS about this, at least in part, recontextualizes the quiet battle for control between the two them. They both know at least some part of the truth. Marcille wants nothing else then to ignore it. Falin wants to be able to talk about it. Marcille's blatant refusal to give her those answers, I think, is what keeps them out of sync - intimate only ever in one direction at a time, never fully together.

And of course, even when directly confronted, Marcille refuses to engage with the truth.

This moment being on the bottom of the page is notable too. There's a beat here. The last panel holds on Falin's face. The reader reaches the bottom of the page, and they are held here for a beat as well, with Falin. It's not quite a rejection yet. What Marcille says isn't directly an answer to Falin's question, but it is a response. A valid one, even! Falin wasn't just asking the question after all, but struggling with guilt that Marcille has every reason to want to reject.

But then you move on the next page, and...

Marcille isn't actually addressing the question at all, not directly. She's deflecting, again. Oh we had a ~difficult time~, there were a lot of "tough situations." Even though she and Falin both know about the resurrection, and Falin has made it clear that she wants to talk about it, Marcille pushes away from the actual topic. She keeps things broad and indirect.

She offers the smallest gesture to Falin - nothing more than a whisper of 'don't worry about it I won't get in trouble' (even though Falin's concern was never just about Marcille getting in trouble).

Marcille then continues to deflect even further, completely changing the subject onto clothes and frog adventures, which seems to distract Falin as well, as she finally gives up on pushing.

And that's where the scene ends! Marcille pushes into Falin's space (without fully realizing), and Falin pushes back. She tries three times to get Marcille to acknowledge her wants, and three times Marcille rejects her, though she does eventually convey some truth. She is honest in her belief that Falin doesn't need to feel guilty, and that things will all work out, even as she continues to deflect the rest of the question. Falin finally accepts that, the topic of conversation changes, and we move on.

But there is a little bit more that happens between them. Towards the end of the chapter, they have this little 'oh no we have to share a bed' situation. Classic stuff.

And Falin seems to realize that the context of this is kinda different now then it was when they were in the magic academy. She's not a kid any more, and they just had those intimate moments in the bath. There's a new tension between them, or one that new at least to the bed sharing of it all.

And in this respect, too Marcille pulls away from what Falin is trying to say. She tries to frame Falin as a kid, tries to insist that nothing is different.

When I first got to this part, it honestly felt... a little uncomfortable? After the bath scene, it is really weird to move into a new intimate situation with Marcille explicitly treating Falin as a kid.

What I have realized in coming back to this scene, though, is how much I think its meant to feel uncomfortable. Throughout the chapter, Marcille's responses to Falin become increasingly patronizing. By letting some of that conflict between them resolve at the end of the first scene, the chapter seems to let things rest, and lets you set it out of your mind.

Then, when the same type of conflict comes back at the end of the chapter, Marcille is even more blatantly treating Falin like a kid, and the unfairness of it hits even stronger. They are both adults, and Falin deserves the truth. After 27 chapters from the perspective of Laios, Marcille, and the others in the group, this progression lets you feel things from Falin's perspective. It's supposed to feel uncomfortable because it IS uncomfortable for Falin, the way no one will quite tell her the truth.

After all, Marcille isn't the only one to do this kind of deflecting when Falin tries to ask about what happened. Laios has a similar response, right down to the 'treating her a bit like a kid' part.

Even more importantly, this final conversation of the chapter reveals one last layer in the knowledge/power imbalance between Falin and the rest of the party: she doesn't actually remember sacrificing herself and teleporting them out.

As I mentioned before, that action was one of the most assertive things we see Falin do in the story, and she doesn't even get to keep that for herself. Instead of being her action, her choice, it becomes yet another thing that the others know more about than her.

I think that's part of why there is such an air of melancholy to this hug they share on the next page

Obviously, obviously, there are so many emotions here for Laios and I don't think its all meant to be viewed as a negative thing, or that he or Marcille are being completely unreasonable. They've been through a lot, and what's more, they think they have time now. So much more time then they actually will have. Time to explain, to open up, to let Falin return to the group in full - as a teammate and not just as someone to be cared for and protected.

But they don't get time. And this relenting by Falin, this "I won't do it again," it's not something that feels triumphant. It's an attempt to comfort them, more a prayer than a promise. As if she is trying to exorcise a spirit. As if she is capable of promising that death won't come, eventually. It's what Laios needs, not what she wants.

That's the real tragedy of the chapter, I think. It's the one time, in the midst of everything, that they have the chance to give Falin what she wants - and they don't do it.

But I do think they realize that, and I think that this failure is a core part of their journey. It's another bittersweet taste to add to the mix - all the missed chances in this chapter to connect, amidst the moments of genuine peace they do get throughout it.

As Laios puts it later...

If Falin hadn't been eaten by the dragon, and perhaps if they hadn't failed her here, they never would have had the adventure that they got to share.

(or, perhaps more tactfully: in life & chapter 28, there are both good times and bad. Thanks, Chilchuk)

[twilightcitysky]

Everything Is Meant (long S2 analysis, part 1)

I cannot figure out for the life of me how to make gifs so this will have to be a gif-less essay. If anyone more tech savvy than me wants to reblog with relevant media, please do!

I've seen a lot of people saying how Aziraphale's actions in the final ten minutes come out of left field and are OOC, and when I first watched the episode I felt the same, but now I think I couldn't have been more wrong. And I don't think Aziraphale is being controlled... I think the entire season showed us exactly what was going to happen.

On first watch, what struck me was the number of plot points that seemed disconnected. I couldn't figure out how Job related to the present, or the Victorian era, or the Nazi zombies (still at sea on the zombies part tbh). I didn't know where the Maggie/ Nina subplot was going, or why we were bothering with it. Then I put my "psych hat" on and it was like seeing one of those 3D pictures come into focus. It's a psychological networking rather than a plot-driven one, which is what Neil told us to expect.

Detailed analysis under the cut, with spoilers:

I went back through the season in my head and started asking myself: why is this element there? What does it contribute?

1. Start with scene one. Why include it? Does it matter for the climax that Az knew Crowley as an angel? YES. It's actually huge. Angel Crowley was joyful, he was bursting with delight at creation, he was idealistic. He wanted to be a part of everything rather than run away from it, and that's still how Aziraphale feels. He loves being a part of things. He's a joiner. He's a landlord. He dances at clubs and he makes human friends and he learns magic. Crowley the demon doesn't seem to want any of that, and I think that's hard for Az. He wants Crowley to be free of the cynicism he thinks prevents him from enjoying life now. At some level, I think he senses that Crowley is depressed (empathy's not his strong suit but I'm sure he's aware that Crowley's in a "what's the point of it all" kind of mood; see the eccles cakes scene). He wants to fix it. Aziraphale is a fixer. Metatron offers him a chance to do that.

Another thing is that Aziraphale knows Crowley ended up Falling just for asking questions that seemed innocent. That's not okay with him. He thinks that with the two of them in charge they can actually MAKE the changes that Crowley wanted to see way back at the beginning, starting with a suggestion box.

2. Okay, now Jim. Obviously Gabriel/ Jim is the central mystery, but why does he matter? First and foremost: he's there to show Aziraphale that angels can CHANGE. Gabriel terrorized and threatened Aziraphale. Az has been terrified of him. He ordered Aziraphale's execution. And now here he is, drinking hot chocolate, doing noble self-sacrificing things, with morals that suddenly align with Aziraphale's. What an absolute game-changer that must have been! He thought Heaven was unfixable, but here's Gabriel in his shop for weeks, slowly convincing him otherwise.

Then two other things happen. First, they find out that this all happened to Gabriel essentially because he fell in love. He was fired and his memories were stolen and the only reason he recovered was because Beelzebub happened to give him the one thing that could save him. That must have seemed like incredible luck. Now, how does Aziraphale feel about memories? He lives in a bookshop that is stuffed to bursting with the records of all of human history, essentially. His memories of his time with Crowley are incredibly precious. He sees, there at the end, that everything he is can be taken from him as a punishment for falling in love. Aziraphale doesn't have a magic fly container. He'd be forever robbed of Crowley, his life, himself. It's a very real threat in his mind when Metatron intervenes.

Which brings us to the second thing. Metatron saves Gabriel. Not only that, he prevents him from being punished for loving Beelzebub and lets them both go. What better way to win currency with Aziraphale? HE doesn't want to go off to Alpha Centauri, he never has, but suddenly he sees that Metatron might protect his relationship. And he's probably the only entity with the power to do so.

So we come to two conclusions: Aziraphale, when he goes off to talk with Metatron, is feeling like maybe it's not intrinsically bad to be an angel. He believed all the angels sucked, and only God was good... but now he sees that even Gabriel can change. He met Muriel, and he likes them. (He also had a huge crush on angel Crowley, which is neither here nor there but he loves Crowley in all his forms.) So if Crowley became an angel again, would that really be so bad? In his mind, it wouldn't change who Crowley is. It would just make them both safer and allow them to be together. (He's wrong! And Crowley doesn't see it that way! But this is a key miscommunication. Aziraphale doesn't really believe that becoming a demon changed Crowley. Back to the first scene, which Aziraphale references during the Job minisode. In his eyes, Crowley is the same person (just more cynical because of what's happened to him)-- so why would it matter if he's an angel again? I truly don't think he was trying to save Crowley, or saying that Crowley would be Better as an angel. To him, it doesn't matter what Crowley is. Which is reductive and harmful, but not the same as thinking Crowley needs rescuing from himself.)

Second conclusion: he sees that an angel and demon can be in love, but they have to run away to be together. Gabe and Beelz couldn't go home again. Earth is Aziraphale's home, but after the attack on the bookshop he learned that without Heaven's protection he can't really keep them safe there. Metatron says: "Come with me, do this thing, and you can have guaranteed safety AND be with the love of your life". Poor Aziraphale wants this with every fiber of his being. All he's ever wanted was for Crowley to be safe. He's never been able to offer it. Over the past four years, he thought they were safe, but he's just learned that he was wrong.

This is getting long. Continued in Part Two!

[uyuforu]

Astrology Observation: Synastry & Composite with In-Laws pt.1

This post will be about Synastry and Composite observations with in-laws. It is only observations, and are not observed on many charts so take it just as a study. I'll make more in the future when I have more details and placements to study. This is also not something I have seen yet, so this is really a theory right now. Take everything you see lightly! In this observation post, I also include brothers and sisters in laws when I talk about In-Laws! Pretty much the family of your spouse. When looking at the Synastry, we look at what the two individuals feel for each other. While Composite is for looking at how their relationship is.

All pictures were found on Pinterest

Other posts you could like:

જ⁀➴ How to know when you will get married?

જ⁀➴ How to make a solar return synastry

જ⁀➴ Boda in Signs, Houses, Degrees

જ⁀➴ Boda Aspects

Book a private reading: menus ; Q&A ; rules ; instagram

Buy me a Kofi •ᴗ•

*IL= In-Laws

𝜗𝜚 Synastry

₊˚⊹♡ Since In-Laws are ruled by the 9H, most of the times you will have 9H synastry with them. Your planets could often fall in your In-Laws' 9H.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IL's Saturn in your 1H could mean they will have hard time to see you, they could hear a lot about you but it will take time to meet you. In any way, it could mean there are obstacles in the way for you two to meet? It can also that they refuse to meet you, or you can't meet them for a while, or perhaps you don't want to meet them? You are not meeting them fast, that's all!

₊˚⊹♡ Your Saturn in your IL's 9H could mean there is distance between you two (physically) and you can't meet them because you live far away from each other. There could also be language barrier between you.

₊˚⊹♡ If your Saturn falls in your IL's 4H, you could struggle to see them or meet them often. You don't get to see them often.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IL's Ceres in your 3H could mean they feel like they can share a lot with you, they feel like you will understand how they feel. Your IL will also encourage you in your intellectual pursuits and your hobbies too. This is a good communication sign between you two.

₊˚⊹♡ Your Ceres falling in your IL's 11H could mean could mean you see your IL as a friend, someone you like to spend time with, and actually enjoy having conversations with them. You could also like to hangout with them even without your spouse.

₊˚⊹♡ If your IL's placements fall in your 7H, they see you as someone they have a "contract with", meaning they are close to you because you are a IL to them, and they see you this way. By being married to you, your IL also see this as being married to you, meaning they don't really have a choice. Some placements falling in your 7H could mean they don't really like you, 7H is also about enemies!

₊˚⊹♡ IL's Sun in your 5H means they see you as one of their child, they will take you as their real son/ daughter than just an IL. You can have a more close relationship with them than just IL. It's a very good placement tbh.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IL's Sun in your 4H means they actually see you as a family member and accept you.

₊˚⊹♡ IL's Sun conjunct your Union asteroid could mean they like you since the day they meet you. It also means you will "travel" to see them (doesn't mean a long travel, it means you will move yourself to them than the other way around).

₊˚⊹♡ Your Sun in your IL's 6H means you will see them as someone who help you, and you will heal some trauma or some fears you have through them.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IL's Sun in your 6H is reversed, your IL could heal some traumas or fear through or with you.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IL's Moon in your 12H means they can understand you in another level, they can read you even when you don't say anything. If you like them, it's great, meaning you have a good relationship. If you don't, well good luck!

₊˚⊹♡ Your Moon in your IL's 10H could mean you could admire your IL very much.

₊˚⊹♡ Your Moon in your IL's 8H could be similar to the 12H synastry, but it could also mean there could be toxic vibes. You could also feel uncomfortable with your IL, there could be conflicts.

₊˚⊹♡ Your Moon in your IL's 5H (or their Moon in your 5H) could be like a siblings kind of relationship, it could be cheeky and fun too.

₊˚⊹♡ Your Mercury in your IL's 9H could mean you don't talk the same language as them and may learn a new language to talk to them. It could also mean you like to learn a lot from your IL and see them as someone you can learn from.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IL's Mercury in your 5H means they could like to joke around with you and they may talk to you very familiar way, you could joke around with them a lot.

₊˚⊹♡ Your Mercury in your IL's 7H could mean you could talk to them in a respectful way. It's also a nice way, not cold.

₊˚⊹♡ Your Mercury in your IL's 4H means you could talk to them in their native language (if you are a foreigner to them). The conversation could be very comfortable and heartwarming too, you may feel comfortable talking to them.

₊˚⊹♡ Same thing if your IL's Mercury fall in your 4H but they could talk to you in your native language if you are a foreigner instead of you.

₊˚⊹♡ Mercury conjunct Mars in this Synastry could mean the conversations are passionate, alive, and not forced, pretty natural. You both could want to talk to each other, but be careful to fights or disagreements.

₊˚⊹♡ Your Venus in your IL's 9H could mean you like the fact they are different from you. If you are a foreigner to them, you may actually enjoy that there is a cultural difference. You could also feel like it's the first time you love your IL so much. The feeling could be reciprocated.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IL's Venus in your 6H could mean they want to take care of you, they could want to give you gift based on what you like (because they listen to you) but also based on what you need, what is best for you in their opinion. They could like to help you and to give you advice. They will care for you.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IL's Venus in your 5H means they really enjoy spending time with you, they could laugh a lot with you and they just are happy to know they can spend time with you.

₊˚⊹♡ Your Venus in your IL's 4H could mean you take care of your IL and you treat them are your real family.

₊˚⊹♡ Venus conjunct Uranus in this Synastry could mean the love and attention the individuals feel are very transformative, they both (or one of them) feel like it's nothing they felt before. For example, my FS and my little brother have that aspect. And my FS is an only child and my little brother is the only boy. So they both could feel like they have the brother they never had.

₊˚⊹♡ Venus conjunct Vertex in this Synastry could mean the love and attention one receive is truly changed by the other one, it could be new or something they never experienced before too. It could also be a major turn for both of them.

₊˚⊹♡ Mars conjunct Ceres could mean Mars person feel responsible for Ceres person and want to appear strong to the Ceres person, they want them to feel impressed.

₊˚⊹♡ My dad's Mars conjunct my FS's Boda also and it could mean my dad will probably be invested in our wedding lol (could he pay...? perhaps?)

₊˚⊹♡ Your Mars conjunct your IL's North Node could mean you will help them in their life purpose!

₊˚⊹♡ Your Mars in your IL's 8H could mean this can be explosive sometimes, you could stand up to them if they get mad, and it can lead to arguments. But you can also help them with that, because you are not scared of them. You stand up for yourself.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IL's Mars in your 10H mean they can admire you a lot and admire how you work, stand for yourself, your confidence, etc. They think you are strong.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IL's Jupiter in your 7H could mean they feel lucky they are bond to you because of the marriage you had with their relative.

₊˚⊹♡ Your Jupiter in your IL's 5H means you feel lucky to be able to have such a close bond with them, you always have fun with them.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IL's IC falling in your 5H could mean they see you as their child (if they are your mother/father in law). And brother sister if it's another relative.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IC conjuncting your IL's Ceres means you will feel like they protect you and care for you like their own family.

₊˚⊹♡ Your Jupiter in your IL's 3H could mean you have good conversation and you could joke around a lot.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IL's Jupiter in your 9H could mean they could want to see you in your country if you are a foreigner or they will want to travel with you.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IL's Jupiter conjunct your MC could mean they will probably think you are doing a good job and admire you for that, they could also be interested in working with you.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IL's Uranus in your 5H could mean you are the child they never had, or sibling they never had.

₊˚⊹♡ Your Chiron in your IL's 1H could mean they remind you of a trauma you had, you could have hard time with them because they will trigger you somehow. You will also heal those with them probably.

₊˚⊹♡ Your Chiron in your IL's 3H could mean there could mean miscommunication problems between you two.

₊˚⊹♡ Your Chiron in your IL's MC could mean you will help your IL to be more confident and to lead more in life. You will be like a mentor to them.

₊˚⊹♡ Chiron in the others 8H or 12H could be complicated, you could also trigger each other, sometimes it can be a sign of not liking each other. If other aspects are good, then it means you will heal traumas together.

₊˚⊹♡ Neptune in the other's 7H could mean you have the illusion the person has good manners and are very into being appreciated. It could mean you can have a bad view thinking the person is not really like that and just pretending to be this way to be liked. Neptune person feel like that about 7H person between. On the other hand, Neptune person could feel like they are actually quite a charming person. On the bad hand, they could think they are fake.

₊˚⊹♡ Your Neptune in your IL's 5H could mean you think your IL is childish and prefer to have fun rather to take their responsibilities. If Uranus is there too, you could actually confront them about it one day.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IL's Neptune in your 10H could mean they could admire you for your work but they could also not exactly know what you do for living. They could also have a certain view on you that is not true, so they could be mistaken about your reputation.

₊˚⊹♡ Your Neptune in your IL's 3H could mean you don't understand when they speak most of the time, or you could lie to them often.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IL's Neptune conjunct your Mars could mean your IL could be easily influenced by you and your opinion. If it is in your 10H, they could really admire you.

First Impressions

₊˚⊹♡ Your 1H in your IL's 11H means you will see them as outgoing, chill, cool and very nice. You will think they are the kind of IL who act in a very unbothered way, and you could also think they have an unconventional way to act with you. For example, if you come from a family who are very high on respect forms, your IL could shock you because they will talk to you in a familiar way directly.

₊˚⊹♡ Your 1H in your IL's 10H means you will see them as cold, distant, quite respectable and sometimes scary. They could want you to think they are this way. This can happen more if it is the Father IL.

₊˚⊹♡ Your 1H in your IL's 7H mans you will see them as respectable, nice, charming, outgoing, and you will like to spend time with them. You will think you spend time because of your obligation as an IL. You can think they dress well too.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IL's 1H in your 2H means they see you as someone who has money, who is respectable and who is someone quite patient, nice and well put together. They can think you are good looking too.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IL's 1H in your 4H could mean they see you as a family member already, someone they want to take care of.

₊˚⊹♡ Your IL's 1H in your 6H means they will see you as someone stable, hardworking and someone who takes care of themselves and someone who is healthy. They could admire you too, and they could want to help you a lot too.

𝜗𝜚 Composite

₊˚⊹♡ Sun in Sagittarius could mean you have a cheeky and fun relationship. You could travel with your IL a lot or you could want to, you could also help each other learning languages. One can admire the other and one can teach a lot to the other. You could consider each other friends.

₊˚⊹♡ Sun in 6H could mean there are some distance between you two and respect. You care about the other and help each other a lot, you may also give each other advices. You could really be each other's motivation. There are still some kind of distance there, meaning that despite you can have a good relationship, perhaps your IL will still want you to be respectful.

₊˚⊹♡ Sun in Scorpio could mean you are not that close, and you don't speak much. You can have some small talk, and you can sometimes have an actual conversation on things that matter much. But rare I guess?

₊˚⊹♡ Sun in 5H is a sign you enjoy each other's company, you can really like talking to each other when you do, and your IL could consider you as a son/ daughter or a brother/sister.

₊˚⊹♡ Sun in Capricorn could mean one of you really respect the other and look up to them a lot.

₊˚⊹♡ Sun in 11H could mean you can think of each other as friends and sometimes siblings depending who is your IL to you. It's a very nice relationship as you two could play often games and video games together and talk about a lot of things. You could also follow each other on social medias too.

₊˚⊹♡ Moon in 11H means you can express your emotions together freely without having the feeling of being judged, you can also feel like you can talk about anything together. You can feel free and very outgoing with them too. It's a true friendship potential here.

₊˚⊹♡ Moon in Aries could mean you have a way to tease each other a lot and you could also have a lot of inside jokes. You could also get in some fights or arguments sometimes since you express your emotions freely and quite spontaneously together.

₊˚⊹♡ Moon in 5H could mean you feel emotionally safe with this person, and you can also like how close it's easy to be with them. They could think you are like a member of the family already. If it is your Mother or Father IL, they could think of you as their son/ daughter, but if it is another like a sibling IL, then they think of you as a bother/ sister.

₊˚⊹♡ Moon in Gemini could mean you joke a lot together, laughing could be often happening. You can like to talk with your IL and you feel like you can express your opinion freely. But you can also gossip together or about each other.

₊˚⊹♡ Moon in 10H could mean you don't hide what you feel towards each other and actually prefer to face each other about your emotions. You enjoy spending time together and respect each other. You could have a desire to work with each other.

₊˚⊹♡ Mercury in Sagittarius means you both joke around and have a good communication, you could help each other with languages and also share your life experiences to each other a lot.

₊˚⊹♡ Mercury 7H means you have a fair way to communicate towards each other. Your conversations can be quite charming, and you could talk about relationships, contracts, what is fair and right, appearances, romance, but also enemies. You could gossip also.

₊˚⊹♡ Mercury in Taurus is a fair way to communicate, you could have a steady communication. Sometimes the conversation can be boring. It can also mean you have a healthy way to communicate towards each other. This can mean you have conversations about money, stability, food, good things in life, shopping, material things, etc.

₊˚⊹♡ Mercury in 11H means you can have a friendly way to talk to each other, and mostly you can joke around easily, and perhaps even talk in a familiar way. You can text often with this person of follow each other on social medias. This means a good friendship can happen if you talk to each other quite often.

₊˚⊹♡ Mercury Capricorn means you are not good doing daily conversations with your IL but you may both prefer to have debates or conversations that are more intellectual. One of you may also really admire the other, and so there is one teacher and one student in this one.

₊˚⊹♡ Mercury 12H means you can understand each other on another level, but it can also mean you don't talk much to each other. You could have difficulties to talk at first and have hard time to understand each other. It can also mean you have conversations that can be very deep and you could also communicate telepathically together if you happen to be very close.

₊˚⊹♡ Venus in Capricorn means you and your IL could buy each other a lot of gifts or things casually, you could always bring something to each other anytime you see each other. You could admire each other a lot or one of you admire the other. You both show a lot of respect for each other.

₊˚⊹♡ Venus in 7H means your IL could feel like they totally adore you, they can be all over you. They will really like spending time with you, and will probably be proud and glad your partner chose you. They will love to see you and will probably will want to spend time with you often.

₊˚⊹♡ Venus in Sagittarius could mean you love to spend time with your IL, and they do too!

₊˚⊹♡ Venus in 6H could be a more cold and distant type of relationship you have with your IL, but deep down they actually care. You may not say it to each other, but you could both try to improve each other's life.

₊˚⊹♡ Venus in 12H could mean you both don't totally express how you feel towards each other. It means that perhaps you and your IL will not hug each other or actually say you appreciate each other. But you could know actually. It can mean you could be shy together lol, or you could be shy with them.

₊˚⊹♡ Mars in Aquarius is a sign of being best friend with your IL.

₊˚⊹♡ Mars in 9H means you could help each other see the bright side of life. There could be a lot of wisdom shared.

₊˚⊹♡ Mars in Pisces means you don't like fighting with each other. There is a lot of support between you two.

₊˚⊹♡ Mars in 1H could mean you help each other with confidence, one of you could help the other more.

₊˚⊹♡ Jupiter in 6H means you could help each other live a healthier life, and you feel like your life improved by knowing each other.

₊˚⊹♡ Jupiter in 9H means you could help each other learn a lot. If you are a foreigner, you both could help each other learning each other's languages. Even if you are, it could also mean expending your mind to new ideas and horizons with this placement. A lot of positive learning and teaching.

₊˚⊹♡ Saturn in 11H means you could have hard time to replace the link you have with your IL. With other bad aspects this could mean you both don't get along well. With good aspects this means you actually have hard time to replace your IL. You have such a close bond with them.

₊˚⊹♡ Saturn in 10H indicates that in order for your IL to trust you, time will be reacquired. It could take time for both of you to become close.

₊˚⊹♡ Saturn in 3H could mean there is a language barrier between you two. Or you could struggle to understand each other sometimes.

₊˚⊹♡ Pluto in 10H means you will both change a lot ever since you met each other.

₊˚⊹♡ 7H Stellium could indicate one of the base of your relationship with your IL is respect but also a lot of fairness. You could love to spend time with your IL and they do to, you both adore each other. You don't see spending time together as an obligation. You could also both want to solve any problems together if one arise, and you could ask for your IL help. They could be a friend to you. You trust them, and they also trust you. I think this is really good with an IL as it is actually a good sign of a good relationship. Your IL could be very happy to have you as their IL.

₊˚⊹♡ 6H Stellium could mean you will heal a lot with your IL. You both could need to either face things or heal trauma, and it is most likely to happen with them. This relationship could be complicated at first since you may feel a bit disturbed with them. Otherwise, you could care a lot about each other. You could like to help each other but also give each other advices. You could still be cold, distant and respectful towards each other, your IL is not your best friend in your head.

₊˚⊹♡ 12H Stellium means one of you idealize the other, and you two could have a close bond. Anything that you say to each other stay as a secret. You both could confide to each other.

₊˚⊹♡ Gemini Rising means most of people around you will see you two having a playful relationship, you can be seen laughing together a lot, joking a lot, but you can also love to debate together. People just see you two talking together a lot.

₊˚⊹♡ Cancer Rising means people could sense there is a strong sense of family between you two. You both could treat each other as a family member, depending on who this is compared to you. For example, my FS has that with my dad, and my FS could see my dad as his other dad, and my dad could see my FS as his other son. People could see you take care of each other and you care about each other. Tho sometimes the relationship could be tense.

₊˚⊹♡ Aquarius Rising here could mean people see you two sharing a good friendship. You could look very different from one another, yet you could get along well. People could also see you talk a lot about technologies or your friendship could be based on similar interest around the topic.

₊˚⊹♡ Aquarius MC could make you and your IL very open to talk and actually liking to discuss about many different topics. You could get along well because you could be both open-minded. This could be a sign you both challenge each other into having a more open mind and actually see realities in different ways.

₊˚⊹♡ Pisces MC could make you both have a complicated relationship, they don't know if you like each other or not. But it could be because you indeed have a complicated relationship with them.

₊˚⊹♡ Scorpio MC could make you both close to each other and you may help each other a lot through rough time. You have a strong bond with your IL and both of you could trust each other a lot.

Thank you for reading!

back to index ; ask ; request ; rules ; instagram

[withleeknow]

i think you'll do well with requests bc they seem to be popular in the fanfic side of tumblr! but even if it doesn't take off that quick, at least that'll be less overwhelming bc some ppl can be so demanding....anyways, i hope the best for you in this new journey haha 💝

me personally, i'm not very creative so i'll leave the details to the professionals (aka you) but i'd like to req something from minho's pov. i think those type of stories are SEVERELY lacking in the lee know fics department lol 🥲 it could be a childhood friends to lovers where he is pining for oc but he has a lot of self esteem issues and thinks she's not interested in him. also a big softie and just all around head over heels for her. you can add your magic! (if this is even remotely interesting enough to write lol i just want a minho pov tbh shsjjfjdjdj 😭)

light years.

summary: three times minho bites his tongue, and one time you don't let him.

pairing: minho x f!reader genre/warnings: childhood friends to lovers, fluff, angst; kissing, cursing, so much pining i could hurl. could this have been more edited? oh absolutely lmao but i actually don't hate it sooo this is what we're going with :p word count: 4.2k note: to the first anon, thank you so much for your kind words! :') and i'm sorry that this took me longer than expected. i was trying to figure out what i wanted to write for your prompt but then i got the second request with the song and i thought they would go nicely together hehehehe i hope the both of you enjoy thissss

as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡

navigation / request masterlist / ko-fi

I'm not sure what it means to love But I blink kind of slow around you I'm not sure what it means to love But I'll grow wherever you do What that means, I don't have a clue

I'm Not Sure - Margeaux Beylier

One.

Minho is 18 years old, and he doesn't know what love is, doesn't really care for it at all.

While his friends are out there wrapped in the clutches of young love - the kind that blooms with stolen glances in classrooms and sticky notes passed in secrecy, Minho finds it simply unnecessary. He doesn't understand it whenever Hyunjin whines about not having a girlfriend because they're still young, they've got all the time in the world for romance later down the line. It's not the end of the world like Hyunjin laments it is.

Minho has his own life to prioritize. College is starting after the summer and he still needs to figure out how he's going to cope with the absence of his cats once he moves away. He's got dancing and he's got his other hobbies to keep him fulfilled and occupied.

And above all, he's got you.

You're getting ready for your sister's wedding when it happens for the first time. Or rather, when it doesn't happen.

You step back into the room where Minho is waiting for you on the sofa, his gaze resting idly on the screen of his phone, scrolling absentmindedly through his friends' group chat even though he has no interest in whatever they're talking about. You cough lightly to indicate your return after disappearing into the bathroom minutes prior to change into your dress. He looks up upon your soft announcement, and when his eyes settle on you, he swears it feels like an invisible force has collided with his chest and knocked all of the air from his lungs.

Throughout all his years of knowing you, inseparable from childhood until now, Minho has never seen you like this - all dolled up with your hair falling over your collarbones, cascading over your shoulders in soft waves that beckons him to run his fingers through. The light blue dress hugs you beautifully, the silky material catching the light from outside the window every time you shift on your feet under his steady gaze.

"So...?" you ask, moving your arms awkwardly behind your back like you're not sure what to do with them. "What do you think?"

What does he think?

Minho thinks you might just be the prettiest girl in the world. He thinks he must have been an idiot his whole life, to have spent most of his waking hours beside you and not once has he noticed how truly breathtaking you are. He thinks about the feeling that spreads in the pit of his stomach, sends warmth throughout his body and makes his heartbeat race a million miles an hours.

Your best friend blinks slowly as he savors the warmth that he's never experienced before. It's similar to the feeling you get when you're sitting under the shade of a big tree on a summer's day. It's comparable to the satisfied tranquility you get after you've just finished a hearty meal. A little hazy in your contentment.

It's not until you probe with a pointed Well? that Minho realizes he's been staring at you in silence for a few minutes now. He swallows thickly, willing away the words that he wants to say but they get lodged in his throat. He reckons it's weird to verbalize them, because it's not how the two of you function. You don't often utter that kind of sentiment out loud and he doesn't either. Never have and likely never will.

In the end, he bites his tongue. "You look presentable," is what he settles on.

You roll your eyes, then reward him with a laugh.

Minho doesn't care about love. He only cares about you.

Two.

Minho is 21 years old, and he's gotten used to his heart beating erratically whenever he's in your presence.

Three years flew by in the blink of an eye, and graduation is just around the corner. You've always done well in school, straight A student with a track record that most could only dream to have. You put in the hours, you do the work. You deserve everything that you've achieved.

But it's been a challenging few months for you both, being seniors and all. He's had to watch you struggle to stay on top of your classes while also having to slave over a thesis 24/7 until you were sure it was perfect. It reduced you to tears a few times, and Minho was there to hold your hand through it all.

He held you in his comforting embrace when you wanted to give up. He made you dinner when you were too immersed in your schoolwork to notice that you'd forgotten to eat. He was your biggest support system; if it weren't for him, you don't know if you would've made it through.

It's hot outside today, a little unbearable but not uncharacteristic for June. Minho waits in a familiar hallway, the same hall that he's walked past for hundreds of times over the past few years, the same hall that he won't see again once he holds a degree in his hands in only a few weeks' time.

As he sits on an old wooden bench, he bounces his leg as if he's one of the people in the classrooms that line the hall. He doesn't have to be on campus today, but here he is regardless because you're scheduled for your thesis defense this morning. You're in one of those rooms, probably also bouncing your leg from the overwhelming nerves. Minutes feel like hours; you went in there a while ago after he had sent you off with a pat on the head and an encouraging Godspeed.

He's nervous for you, but he's sure that you'll do great. Years of hard work accumulating in what must be the most important moment of your academic journey. You even stayed up all night last night, refusing to sleep a wink just to revise your arguments and talking points.

Minho's head snaps up instantly as he hears a door creak open, the sound of it reverberating throughout the empty hallway like a gong announcing your return from battle. It takes you a few seconds to step out of the room and into his line of sight. He can't see you very well with all this distance between you, but he can still make out the way your frame is visibly shaking with every step you take. He rises to his feet, and you break into a sprint.

He opens his arms wide - a hug of consolation or congratulations, he doesn't know yet - but he still can't seem to brace himself for the collision. You run straight into his embrace, your warms wounding around his middle tightly. Minho feels your tremors, hears your sniffles from where you're pressing your cheek against his shoulder.

"How did it go?" he asks gently.

You start crying then, and he doesn't know if the tears that his shirt is soaking up are those of joy or of grief, but he holds you through it anyway. He swears he can feel every single beat of your heart, hammering so wildly as you're pressed against him like you could sink into him if only you'd push just a little bit more.

"I passed," you say in between sobs. "I got an A."

Minho heaves out the breath that he's been holding ever since you entered that classroom, but it's not like he had any doubt about it to begin with. He hugs you tighter than he's ever had before, and he loves you just the same.

You two must look so dramatic, all wrapped up together in your own little bubble, but who the fuck cares? Although, when another student passes by and coughs, you do break away from him, a little embarrassed for a second.

Even with your hair all mussed up and your flushed cheeks stained with tears, he still thinks you look the same as you did when you were 18 at your sister's wedding. The prettiest girl in the world.

Minho wipes away the wetness on your face with his sleeves, then swipes with gentle thumbs at the moisture that's gathered along your lash lines.

"Holy fucking shit," you breathe out, your shoulders sagging with evident relief, so much more relaxed now that you've done it. "I can't believe it's finally over."

Your best friend can't entirely agree, because he's always believed in you. He's had faith in you since the beginning, since you were mere children laughing and crying together on the playground. You were meant to do great things, this was always crystal clear to Minho.

I love you, he thinks as he smooths a hand over your hair, his chest swelling with nothing but pride and fondness for you. You did so well.

But it's not what he ends up telling you. He swallows it down, washes it away with a dose of regret and longing. He's still not the type to express sappy sentiments, and he's grown accustomed to adoring you only in secret.

"Let's go," he says softly. "I'll buy you dinner."

Minho is still young, he's still got his whole life ahead of him, but he knows what love is now. He knows that it's you.

Three.

Minho is 24 years old, and he finds it hard to make peace with the fact that you're starting to get out there, that you're finally going on dates now that academics aren't taking up most of your time anymore.

To be fair, none of the guys you've seen have been graced with a second date, and Minho thanks his lucky stars whenever you return from a night out and text him a simple Not it. He knows that it wasn't your decision in the first place, that your mom and your sister have been setting you up on blind dates because they want to see you bring a boyfriend home.

You complain about it all the time, whining about how you're not interested but your family is adamant on it. Minho is well aware, and yet, there's a part of him that's a little shaken, because what if? What if the universe miscalculates and the stars misalign just enough in his misfortune for you to cross paths with someone who's absolutely perfect for you? Someone who's a good man that can give you what you've always deserved to have.

He really doesn't know what he would do if that happens. When it happens?

He doesn't know why you're here tonight either, sitting on a chair on the other side of his kitchen island in a pretty dress when you're supposed to be going on a date in half an hour. The guy apparently works for a big record label, some producer that your sister knows through a friend of a friend.

You look indifferent, kind of bored, as you watch Minho makes dinner for himself. "You seem miserable," he comments, taking a quick break from chopping vegetables to glance up at you. You do look a bit miserable, but you're still the most beautiful in his eyes.

You throw your head back and groan loudly, "Because I am. God, I don't know why they keep making me do this. These guys always give nothing."

"Please elaborate."

"They're all boring suits with tedious routines." you say, and as absentminded as your tone is, it sounds a little pointed to Minho's ears. "They don't make me laugh."

Do they not make you laugh, or do they not make you laugh more than I can?

"Then don't go," he snickers, though there's no humor in his voice at all. "These guys sound like duds. Just tell your sister to fuck off."

"Do you mean that? Do you really think I shouldn't go?"

And there's something in your gaze, something so suddenly expectant in the way you're looking at him that makes Minho wonder. If he says yes, would you listen? Would you stay here with him? Would you stay here for him?

I'm serious. Don't go. You can have this and I'll make myself ramyeon. Just be here with me.

You both stare at each other on either side of his kitchen island for an infinite stretch of time. He feels like your eyes are trying to tell him something that he can't decipher, as if they're sending him signals in a language that he never learned how to read.

For a second there, he indulges himself. He pretends that you're only asking because you want to hear him say it. That you want him to put up a fight and not let you go.

But he bites his tongue because it's become a bad habit. A habit that he can't shake because he simply doesn't have the courage to do so. Because if you stay here tonight, looking like that under the cozy lighting of his living room, he might just spill his secrets and he wouldn't be able to take it when reality comes crashing down and you end up telling him that you've never felt the same way.

"I'm kidding," he musters up the words, and tries to plaster on a smile for your sake, even though he's not sure if you really believe it. "You're dressed up anyway. Go and get a free fancy dinner, if anything."

Minho knows what love is, but his love has always lived in the shadows, his longing has only existed in the dark that it terrifies him just thinking about it meeting the light.

Four.

Minho is 26 years old, and he's been a coward for the better part of a decade.

Maybe he's loved you for even longer, but he has spent the past eight years head over heels in love with you, and not once has he done anything about it. Never been able to gather enough courage to ask you out, never even hinted at his feelings for you. He loves you from his place by your side and yet, you've never known.

He loves you the most, but he loves you in the worst way that a person can love another - he loves you in silence.

You're the prettiest girl in the world, and Lee Minho is a pathetic coward.

All these years, he's kept quiet and for what? There's always a spot reserved for him right next to you and yet, it feels like he can only watch you from the sidelines, far away from where it really matters, because he doesn't think he can fit into your life the way he truly wants. You taught him what love was, and love, to Minho, is unattainable. Something he can spend the rest of his life yearning for but won't ever have.

Love hurts. Sometimes, all love does is hurt.

"I would've taken you to a nice restaurant if you asked, you know," he says, putting a chocolate cupcake on the coffee table in front of you before he sits down next to you on the fluffy carpet of your living room. He pulls out a candle next, placing it right in the center of the sweet treat.

Your gaze follows his hand has he lights the candle, your eyes glinting with excitement as though you're a child again and your favorite day of the year is still your birthday. The tiny flame curves and bends, dancing to a rhythm that looks like only you can hear. You watch the candle like it's magic, while Minho just watches you, thinking the same thing.

He watches as you close your eyes and clasp your hands together for the theatrics, then you blow out the flame seconds later with a swift breath.

You turn to him with a smile, "I don't need a nice restaurant. This is perfect."

He blinks, and there's that warmth simmering in his belly again. He first felt it when he was 18, and he feels it now. He feels it almost every moment that he spends with you, and he reckons it's only reasonable, because you're his home personified and love can still be beautiful even when it hurts. There's his heart racing again, but that's nothing new to Minho.

He muses over your words. Perfect. Just one simple word is enough to get his hopes up in a way that it really shouldn't.

Your definition of a birthday well spent is in your cozy apartment, eating takeout pizza with your best friend. Perfect, to you, is him baking you a singular chocolate cupcake upon your request and being with him within these four walls, where his fingers occasionally brush yours when you sit next to each other.

Oh, Minho would follow you to the ends of the earth if you asked him to.

He clears his throat lightly, breaking away from your gaze that's full of gratitude and childlike wonder. "What did you wish for?"

"I'm not gonna tell you. It won't come true then."

Wishes don't come true anyway, he thinks, but obviously he won't say it out loud to you, and on your birthday no less. Instead, he diverts his attention to the cupcake, subconsciously tonguing his cheek as he takes a small chunk of the sweet and offers it to you.

You let him feed you even though your eyes are narrowed. "What was that look?" you ask.

"What look?"

"You had a look."

"No, I didn't," Minho insists.

"Yes, you did. You wanted to say something, didn't you?"

He shrugs, popping a piece of cupcake into his own mouth. The answer is yes, he did want to say something, but if you want to get technical about it, then he's wanted to say something for years now. He asks you the same thing every birthday, What did you wish for?, and you would refuse to tell him every time.

"Wishes don't come true," he verbalizes it this time, with a voice that's lighthearted on purpose despite knowing that you wouldn't take it that seriously either way.

You roll your eyes. "Now you're just being pessimistic."

"What? I'm speaking from experience."

"You've never had a birthday wish come true?"

"My birthday wishes haven't come true since I was 18."

Minho feels your eyes on the side of his face, and when you remain quiet for a beat too long, he turns his attention back to you. "What?"

"How do you know they didn't come true?"

"Because..."

Because you've been my wish for almost a decade now. I didn't use to believe in wishes but I always believed in you. Every year, I wish for you to look at me the way I look at you, but it never comes true. Every year, I wish that you would love me back, not just as a friend, but you never do. You are my wish, but you're also the very reason why I know wishes don't come true.

Then he's laughing, but nothing is remotely funny about this. It's your birthday and suddenly all he can think about is how much it stings to be reminded that you're the only thing he'll ever wish for, and still, maybe this simple wish is absurd enough that the universe will never grant him what he truly wants.

"Never mind," he says. "This whole thing is silly."

There he goes, biting his tongue again. Coward.

"No, what were you going to say?"

"You're so bossy today," Minho pretends to complain.

"It's my birthday. Tell me," you press on, and suddenly he can't find any appreciation for your stubbornness that he's adored all his life. You keep your eyes fixed on him when all he wants to do is hide from you.

What is he supposed to say to you? What can he even say? That he's spent more than a third of his life hopelessly enamored with you? That the second he utters any of this out loud, he knows it will be the end of your friendship?

And Minho can't afford to lose you. Even if it hurts, he would rather let love hurt than live in the absence of you.

"Eat your cupcake," he says instead. "I'll get some ice cream."

He makes a move to get up, and the bad habit further cements its place in his subconscious. He's always running away from you when you're supposed to be the person he can be the most open with. This is how he knows he doesn't deserve you.

But you reach for his wrist and it makes him still, the feeling of your hand sliding downward to hold onto his fingers. He's used to the feeling of your smaller hand in his, used to how he can hear his heartbeat in his ears whenever you lace your fingers together.

What he isn't accustomed to, is the look on your face this very second, akin to the one you wore two years ago as you sat on the other side of his kitchen island, asking him if you should go.

Expectant and hopeful; you're holding something back too.

The words that slip from your lips are ones that he never imagined you would say to him.

"I've waited for you long enough."

His poor excuse of retrieving ice cream is all but forgotten as he stares at you, doe-eyed and despairingly confused. "What is that supposed to mean?"

You take a breath, and Minho wonders if this is how he looked every time he wanted to say something only to back down in the end.

Then it all comes rushing out.

"For a while, I thought there might've been something between us, something more than just friendship. I don't know why I thought that, I just had a feeling. On the day of our graduation, I thought you would finally kiss me or at least say something, but you didn't. Whenever I went on dates, I wanted you to tell me not to go, that I was wasting my time with those guys that couldn't make me laugh because they weren't you. You never said anything, you never did anything. I waited every birthday just like I waited tonight. You're still holding it over me and I'm starting to wonder if you really love me too or if I imagined everything this whole time."

Your voice gets smaller toward the end, almost as if the uncertainty takes over you the longer he remains silent. He doesn't have the words for it, doesn't really have the mental capacity to process all of what you just professed. Years and years of longing, of hoping that you would come running into his arms the same way you did on the morning of your thesis defense, and it turns out that you were always the one waiting for him to reach you.

If you really love me too.

Your fingers start to loosen around his but Minho doesn't let you get away, not now and not ever again. Not when he finally knows that he's burnt up enough of your time just because he was too stuck in his head to see that you were holding a hand out for him all along.

He pulls you into his orbit and he likes to imagine that somewhere out there in the infinite universe, two stars collide when he kisses you for the first time, long overdue but still heavenly nonetheless.

He's crying but you don't seem to mind the tears. You're kissing him back and it's really all that matters. He can't think straight but he adores you to the point that his lungs ache.

"I love you," he mumbles against your lips. The sentiment comes out clumsy, half coherent but wholeheartedly sincere. "I'm sorry. I love you, I love you, fuck, I love you."

You're the one who breaks the kiss first, with your hand on his chest gently pushing him away. Panic instantly shoots through him like a lightning strike. These are the words he's been holding back for years, did he not even say them right? Did he fuck things up yet again?

You brush the tears from his cheeks, your voice so impossibly soft when you ask, "Do you mean it?"

Minho splinters into a million pieces, of course he does.

Your name falls from his lips, sounding like a prayer, like the most tender plea that's ever been uttered, "I love you the most. I'm so in love with you that it hurts. I've been yours for so long and I never said anything. Fuck, I-I'm sorry. I love you so much. I'm sorry. I-"

You bring his face to yours once more, shushing him with a kiss that makes him putty in your hands. You tell him that it's okay, and you kiss him like you forgive him. The world could be ending right now, and he doesn't think that either of you would even care very much.

Because you're the only wish of his life, and you kiss him as though you want to make up for the lost years. Because Minho feels like he's 18 again and you're the most beautiful girl in the world, wearing a smile that leaves him breathless in the most wonderful way possible.

all rights reserved © withleeknow. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted 06.05.2024]

[prone-to-fleeting-obsessions]

Dating Yandere Aventurine hc's

Obviously tw for toxic relationship dynamic and so on, but it's really mostly fluff tbh

It's not the moment that he lays eyes on you, nor the first time he hears your lovely voice, that sparks his interest

It's later, after a few interactions, that he's left wondering why exactly do your eyes look like that in the sunlight, why can't he help thinking about the last words you said to him, and why on earth does he want to remember how your palms feel against his...

It's annoying, a stupid little weakness that's he's really hoping fizzles out with the rest of his long lost desires

It's even more annoying when it doesn't...

He wants to be around you, to see you happy and content... Wants to be the one that causes that

He tries to appease his little crush in subtle ways

Buying you gifts, taking you out, reluctantly opening up, all hoping for a reaction that would kill that desire, just any emotion that would convince him you weren't the perfect person he's built you up to be

All for not... Every little reaction just grows his want, multiplies his need to have more of you

After fully coming to terms with that, he'll try courting you casually, playing up his charm, his nonchalance

As if his emotionally distant performance can cover the fact that he's only getting more desperate

He's lying to himself, trying to convince his own heart that he doesn't need you

That he doesn't spend every waking second imagining you right beside him, all the pretty expressions you'd make and amusing remarks that'd pull a genuine smile from his lips

It's a coping mechanism, but a poor one in comparison with really have you there

And why can't you be there...?

Texting becomes much more common

Various pictures and paragraphs meticulously detailing where he is and what he's doing, in the hopes that you might choose to show up of your own accord

Silly little good morning or good night texts played off as a joke, as if he isn't anxiously awaiting confirmation that you're still happy and well

He's always been good at reading people, a skill of his trade really, so your emotions are like an open book

Anyone you want him to be, he'll play the part flawlessly

A rich flirty playboy? An impulsive and fearless gambler? Maybe a doting attentive lover? All of those are masks he will happily adorn

You'll know something's up when the gift giving starts to get a little heavy handed

Gorgeous expensive bouquets with his calling card, very pretty jewelry (most of which includes a familiar looking green gemstone), and really a variety of other small gifts that fit in line with interests you told him about in passing

He'll claim complete ignorance to the amount, stating he's only buying what reminds him of you (which is pretty much every little thing he sees—)

And "Oh don't worry, dear friend. Consider it a token of good will! Can't have you forgetting about me.~"

He'll make himself quite a nuisance if you don't eventually give in to his little games

Though his work schedule keeps him from actively stalking you, it's not uncommon for suspicious looking IPC personal to be seen whenever you're out in public

He's just paranoid, really, that's all it is...

He couldn't live with himself if his darling went and got themself hurt

When officially together, you're probably going to spend a lot of time with him...

He'll make his office more accommodating for you! You can decorate your space however you desire, nothing is too good for his love

It generally helps his morale to have you around at work too

He's not nearly as stressed and short tempered with his beautiful perfect love always at arms length, read to be scooped up and showered in affection when he needs a break

"Oh come onnnn... It'd be so boring without you. You wouldn't leave me all alone, right...?" He coos, gently pulling you by your waist closer to him with a needy grin, eyes shining slightly as he tilts his head, pressing a soft little kiss to your wrist before glancing up at your eyes.

It's enough of a difference that the IPC might actually start giving you a paycheck under the title of "emotional support employee" simply to avoid having to deal with him when you're not around

He'll make it up to you by taking you out to fancy lunches, and dinners... and occasional breakfasts—

There's actually a good handful of days that he simply refuses to come in because he woke up with you laying on him and would physically rather die than move

His jealousy issues are a little more pronounced now, too...

He's hates having to get violent, really, but he has absolutely no qualms with calling out and publicly humiliating anybody for staring to long or being passively rude

But if anybody is being outright aggressive towards you, it's a completely different story

Don't they know who you belong to? How easily he could ruin their entire livelihood with a single phone call?

His eyes will narrow, his smile getting a little wider as his grip on you tightens, memorizing the persons face as it drops in realization, oh what a thrill~

He'll be an obsessive possessive mess, but there are worse things than being the sole focus of an attentive and devoted man...

Ignoring how he'd rather suffocate than see you smile so genuinely at anyone else with those perfect lips he just adores, of course

[reignpage]

hello my love 💕 loving the recent updates as alwayysssss 😩 but I had a horny ask if you could, pretty please, you don’t have to but would love if you could

how often do each of the jjk men jork it? 😈 and any added details of their sesh: which hand(s), any edging/overstim, or do they play with the back door (i think Toji defo does but will NEVER admit) or you know general jorkin details 🙈

sigh, I woke up to horniess and now I will sleep to horniness, ventila98 you need holy water 😔

this was a little difficult cause I have no idea what goes on in a man's head as they jerk off but I really tried to embody their spirit, even closed my eyes and phantom jorked my imaginary penis and everything

....

Gojo:

how often?

depends on how busy this man is, I think. like if he doesn't really have much to do in a week, he'll likely do it everyday tbh. does it when he's bored is what I'm saying.

where?

anywhere really. he's away on missions often, so hotel rooms, in the bathroom, in bed, on the sofa. just anywhere he gets the urge to.

edges/overstimulates?

he edges himself for sureee, man wants to push his limits and tries to see how long he can last until the need becomes overwhelming.

choice of lubricant?

he's too good to use just any lotion, his dick is special. probably strawberry flavoured. deffo gets curious once in a while and tastes his own cum.

porn?

I feel like he doesn't really watch porn, just uses his imagination most of the time cause he's so focused on his own personal challenge. but if he does watch porn, it's of a threesome, two men one woman, totally doesn't think about a certain long haired bff 👀

Geto:

how often?

not too often, very rarely. too busy with his cult and plans for world domination. but when he gets really frustrated with monkeys and all the burden he has, then he'll seek out release.

where?

in the bath. he's kind of a clean freak, right? or at least he just hates monkey dirt, so I imagine being around so many non-sorcerers gets to him and the knowledge that he's partaking in something as monkey-like as self-pleasure fills him with a need to cleanse. and it's a bath, not a shower, specifically because he likes to take his time, to pamper himself.

edges/overstimulates?

edges too. there's a bit of internalised disgust so he tries to punish himself by pushing away the pleasure until he's sure he deserves it.

choice of lubricant?

lotion. I imagine he carries hand lotion often, he takes care of himself. and because he doesn't do it often enough to buy himself lube.

porn?

exhibitionism shit. like sometimes semi-public videos, and other times, fucking in front of a crowd. doesn't really like the aggressive porn videos, wants one that takes it slow, that builds up the torture, not just physical but also mental.

Choso:

how often?

every night. needs it to fall asleep tbh. thinks its wrong to do it during the day and he really beats himself up when he gets horny when the sun's still up. there's a lot of shame there that no one, under any circumstances, should exploit in our poor cho cho 🙂

where?

in bed. doesn't even dream of doing it anywhere else because it's too filthy, too naughty. he hides under the covers even if he's completely alone and tries to stifle his moans, biting his lip and throwing his head back against the pillows as he writhes.

edges/overstimulates?

overstimulates once in a while. most of the time he's just trying to get rid of the urge so he can sleep soon. but sometimes, he's in a mood to push himself, to extend the pleasure, to bring himself to tears. he loves being overstimulated so so so so much.

choice of lubricant?

lotion. has one right on his bedside table that he uses just for his special time. likes the vanilla scent. tasted the lotion with his cum once. he didn't hate it.

porn?

probably doesn't even know what porn is lol. if he does though, he goes wild. like he's watching every single video he possibly can. when he first starts watching porn, anything he watches gets him going. but once he's gotten over that beginner phase, he's a lot more discerning. likes the intimate videos, the one where it's at night, and you can tell the couple actually really loves each other.

Toji:

how often?

3-4 times a week. surprising? I think he's at an age where he's not getting turned on by a nice piece of ass. plus, he whores himself out, so he gets plenty of sex. he's not a pent up little teenager. does it when he's bored or when the natural need arises. morning wood is dealt with and if he can't sleep he'll jerk off.

where?

anywhere. does it in shiu's car sometimes. he jerks off pretty often in public toilets. does it on the sofa more than the bed, like if he's watching tv, he'll absentmindedly jerk off.

edges/overstimulates?

jerks off to cum most times. doesn't really view masturbation as an form or anything. it's just to satisfy an itch so he doesn't play around. but if he's feeling extra frustrated, he edges cause he knows the orgasm is better when you push it away.

choice of lubricant?

his spit and then his pre-cum. I hc he leaks a lot of pre cause of them big ass balls (is that how it works biologically, idk and who cares). doesn't have money for fancy shit.

porn?

lesbians probably. doesn't really like orgies or gang bangs. seeing too many men turns him all the way off lol. but he deffo likes the ones with a plot. sexy fireman saves slutty nurse from vibrating chair or something idk

Nanami:

how often?

a couple times a week. he's too busy to even think about sex. and he's also too stressed to get boners. I kinda feel like erectile dysfunction would be something that isn't a complete stranger to him if he's in a relationship. well anyways, he does it when he's really stressed and frustrated and he has so much tension to release. he'll take it out on his cock.

where?

in his office quite often. under the desk, not even bothering to lock the door. or in the bathroom cause he wants to be able to clean up the mess quickly.

edges/overstimulates?

usually neither. jerks off to cum too. he's always in a rush so he doesn't have time to play around. but if he does, then he switches up. edges more often than overstimulates, but he does the latter if he's reallyyyyy into it. like he's really feeling freaky and wants to feel some pain.

choice of lubricant?

lube. he used lotion a lot when he was younger and it caused him rashes, so he's since invested in proper lubricant. not flavoured, but definitely the warming/tingling kind.

porn?

only when he's in a safe space, like without the fear of getting caught. so if he's at home. and he has the time. probably watches couples too, likes the more intimate ones, the ones that focuses on the women's pleasure. he hates the fake moans and the overly produced videos. think it's just shameful. so he really likes homemade videos. sometimes tho, he does like the ones where its teacher punishing student. but that's very rare cause it gives him so much post-nut guilt lol.

Sukuna:

how often?

once in a blue moon. maybe even once in decades tbh. just doesn't really get boners and if he does, he just leaves it alone cause he's not a weak little mortal.

where?

in his chambers mostly. thinks it's a private matter so wants to keep it personal and intimate. and he also wants to take his time so he needs a place where he won't be interrupted with the sight of a snivelling little rat.

edges/overstimulates?

edges. personal challenge. wants to see how long he can last and how much he can take. could go on for hours. squeezes his base just at the last minute.

choice of lubricant?

spit. doesn't use lube, might not even know it exists, and he probably doesn't even use lotion let's be real. so he spits on his hand, or drools right onto his cock, or manifests his curse mouth onto his palm to slobber his own dick with his spit.

porn?

does not watch porn. he's traditional. doesn't even really think of anything in particular. his sexual experiences is limited I imagine. and if he does watch porn, then he'd much prefer homemade ones and bdsm, probably hates the overproduced ones too cause of all the extreme plastic surgery. he's a snob.

[bubbleberryuniverse]

- GHOST PERI AU -

(AKA Petrified!Peri because that name is cool as FUCK.)

REFERENCES ALSO AVAILABLE HERE!

REGULAR COLORS / HIS BODY [NOT GHOST]

GHOST COLORS / HIM AS A GHOST

SO. You may be asking, "what happened to him?" And I am here to EXPLAIN! :]

This AU is still a fairly [pun unintended] big WIP, so some details are still all over the place/undecided, and some may change over time; constructive criticism, opinions/thoughts, questions, are all appreciated!

The general idea is, well... divergent from the finale. What if, after the chip is grabbed and Hazel, Wanda, [and maybe Cosmo? I don't recall if he goes with them/ends up somewhere else] go to fix the wand, Peri explodes. And it gets undone when Hazel wishes to fix Fairy World. Buuuttt... not quite!

It wasn't her 1 Millionth Wish that she used up on Fairy World— which is why it Doesn't Quite Fix Him Going Kaboomey. But I imagine that having 1Mil Wishes had a mild influence on What Happened and why exploding DID get fixed... sort of. [I need to brainstorm specifics on this.]

ANYWAY.

Peri looks GENERALLY normal most of the time, except for, well, *gestures at reference.* Outside of THAT [cracked wand, cracked crown [crack hidden by the glow], slightly off color pallete], there's some other stuff that's just a Hint of Wrong.

Like coughing up confetti and/or rainbows [without any other sign of magical backup [which he can't experience anymore because he did technically already die via backup.]] And sometimes the funny silly wacky expressions that happened during buildup [big ol' eyes/pupils, star shaped pupils, funny faces [like when he was talking to Dev.]

Throwing this in here. Sometimes he just stares like the TBH Creature. It's kinda silly kinda funny. I need to make a Petrified!Peri TBH emote because that fits well.

I was ALSO thinking about the idea that sometimes limbs can detach [the ghost fairy in that one ep is what gave me this thought], mostly for expressive purposes/fun silly purposes. It can be seen in this image here! Still DEBATING on this, though.

ANYWAY.

ANYWAY.

Cosmo and Wanda Don't Know He Died [because of not being right there] But something Is Off. Peri probably doesn't at first either until they [themself] put it together through context clues, and then they're like, "ooohh no, mom and dad probably don't know I exploded!" And he gets REALLY nervous about them finding out because that'd be A Lot and he doesn't want to Worry Them [because... he fucking died.]

So. There's a lot of him just trying not to Act Suspicious. Which only makes them both concerned! I have so many silly funny interactions between them that I imagine, actually!

Like...

Peri: *Talking. Suddenly... star pupils!*

Wanda: Um. Sweetie?

Peri: Hey do you see that?

Cosmo: Oooh, see what?

Peri: Over there! *Points.*

Cosmo + Wanda: *Looks over.*

Peri: *Disappears.*

WHICH. YEAH. SO. GHOST FORM. They're completely hidden when they're actually a GHOST, and has no wand/wings when they're a ghost, either [they do have wings normally, I just forgot to include them in the reference.] And I imagine whenever they poof into their ghost form that they leave a tiny bit of confetti behind!

ALSO.

He reassigns himself to Dev on his own [who didn't forget after the finale.] And his magic is kind of fucked up. Cause he's DEAD and look at his fucking WAND. So wishes kinda get fucked up when granted a bit sometimes ehehehaha...

ANYWAY.

I am also dumping my Peri headcanons onto him. They're transmasc nonbinary and use he/they pronouns and they're also aroace! :3

PLEASE. PLEASE send me any asks if you have any questions! You don't have to ask to draw them, either— just tag me in any art if you ever make any, please! :]

[dunmeshistash]

The thing about Laios as well, is what if Kui genuinely didn't intentionally write him to be autistic? It's impossible to know how much she does or doesn't know about autism or if that was ever something she was directly considering in the process of making him. People have been joking (?) about how angry they'll be and how they'll lose faith in her as an author if she says she didn't write him to be autistic and it feels like it's putting really pressure on her (with no knowledge of her personal life and experiences in a culture that stigmatizes autism greatly) and putting autistic fans in a bad situation no matter what happens, because ableists aren't suddenly going to be any more positive about it if she says he is and if she says he's not or doesn't give an answer then that'll just embolden more people to be hateful, especially if people do react badly to that. With the way people have been getting really invasive about Kui's sexuality for ages now, too, I'm worried about how entitled people feel to her living up to their idea of her as a person and that the same kind of parasocial treatment could happen over this.

I'm autistic and think Laios is an autistic character regardless of if Kui would describe him by that word and that it's important to discuss that in a positive light. I don't think that's any less the case even if she does say directly that's not how she wrote him. But it feels like the pressure on her to confirm it is a situation that could go very badly in a lot of ways.

Kui has written about mental health in other situations, more specifically she has a whole one shot that uses being a werewolf as a metaphor to being a special needs child and one which compares socializing to a rythym game because it feels so hard to the main character. (Edit: Oh yeah the werewolf one is a little... idk how much I agree with it, it's negative about medication use so you might want to not read it)

I think is HIGHLY unlikely it wasn't on purpose, there's details about Laios that have no need to be there otherwise like the fact he has texture issues

tbh I think it's a little rude to imply she wrote a perfect autism representation by accident?

People are overreacting as usual about whether she admits it out loud or not tbh. I see it as them having no respect for her as a real person only wanting the image they have of her to fit.

[sxcret-garden]

hmmm smth im curious about…mtl likely in ateez to be a brat tamer/enjoy a bratty s/o

we're just gonna ignore the fact that this ask is almost 3 months old ok aksldjöfksa i've been wanting to answer this for ages and suddenly so much time has passed... anyway

thanks for the ask, anon!! my detailed thoughts are under the cut~ i hope you enjoy hehe

most

Hongjoong

Wooyoung

Jongho

Mingi

Yunho

San

Seonghwa

Yeosang

least

I think both Hongjoong and Wooyoung would thoroughly enjoy being with a bratty s/o! Hongjoong especially strikes me as such a brat tamer - dating a brat will for sure bring out his dominant side a lot! He'll have so much fun playing with you, figuring out how to make you submit to him and what kind of punishments you enjoy receiving just as much as he enjoys giving. The type to learn very quickly how to keep you under control outside of the house - however, once you're in the comfort of your own home he'll deliberately give you a bit more freedom to go wild, because he loves observing your bratty behaviour almost as much as he loves it when he gets to put you in your place for it. The same goes for Wooyoung, except he'll give you a lot more freedom to tease and disobey him. In that, he's not the biggest brat tamer I think - though on some days dom!Wooyoung will jump out and completely ruin you - but he enjoys the playful power exchange of being with someone willing to challenge him. He'll definitely let you win on some days, while on others he'll make sure to drag out the mutual teasing for hours, until you're both so horny that you just can't keep your hands off each other anymore.

Of course Jongho needs to be in the top 3 for this, but I didn't put him at the very top because I think he isn't up for brat taming all the time. Sometimes he just needs things to be peaceful and sweet while having sex - more often than the people ranked above him - but that doesn't mean he won't enjoy himself when you do act up. Will be pretty strict with you, and when you're both in the mood for it, hard dom!Jongho will jump out. As much as you misbehave, he'll be mean to you, knowing just how to break you into submitting to him completely, and he won't be satisfied until there's not a single thought of disobeying him left in your mind. And tbh he definitely gets off on outsmarting you and making you beg for him to finally give you what you need after he made sure you're done being bratty for the day.

I put Mingi fourth because I think while he wouldn't explicitly be seeking out a bratty partner, being with a brat would bring sides of him to light that no other kind of person could. I think you gotta smooth him into the experience, but after you've gotten comfortable with each other, bratty behaviour just might tickle a very dominant side out of him. Like one day you'll be teasing him in public and this guy will just eventually have enough of your attitude, drag you off somewhere, and whisper the dirtiest threat possible in your ear and neither of you will know where that just came from kslfjasdjf needless to say, he'll really enjoy discovering all about this very different side to him together with you.

Yunho and San would both enjoy having their partner acting bratty sometimes, but they wouldn't want to take on the role of a brat tamer all the time in my opinion. They're both softies at heart and need times where they can simply please you and make you feel good without any big power dynamics involved, being more on the service dom side of things after all. For Yunho especially, I think that he would rather keep things to the comfort of your own home, so his first instinct at you trying to rile him up or tease him in public wouldn't be to put you in your place or anything (though I do think he'd be up for that sometimes if you discussed it beforehand!). That said, I do think that both Yunho and San enjoy this kind of dynamic from time to time! They both have a dominant side to themselves, and they're definitely more than willing to try brat taming with a trusted partner. And just like with Mingi, you might uncover some surprising sides of them in the process...

As someone who has trouble seeing Seonghwa as a big dom, I put him towards the lower end of the list. He's probably a bit similar to Mingi, in that a bratty s/o might just tickle a side out of him that enjoys brat taming a lot! But I think he isn't as likely to actually end up with a bratty s/o. He wants to please you in any way he can, and certainly enjoys submitting to his partner too, so if his s/o turns out to want to be brat tamed, he might not really know what to do with that at first. Though if you're really into that, you two will be sure to figure out how to go about it in order to make the experience enjoyable for both of you!

Last but not least is Yeosang, because I just really think he'd prefer submitting to his partner than the other way around. I just don't see him as a brat tamer at all, so if you throw some bratty behaviour his way he will just be very confused and not know how to respond to that at all. Sure, over time you two can definitely incorporate some teasing into your sexual relationship, and if you explain to him how you want him to react to you being bratty he'll definitely do that. But I think it'd be more something he's willing to dip his toes into in order to please you, and not something that comes natural to him or that he'd get the most pleasure out of!

[ephie-om]

Song: Novacaine - The Unlikely Candidates

CW: possessive behavior, yandere tendencies (it's Levi what did you expect tbh)

Day 3: Leviathan

Levi is doing his best to summon the courage to go knock on your bedroom door. He wouldn't do this for anyone else, you know, but he can't go too long without his player two, and you haven't been responding to any texts or in-game chats. He makes his way down the hall and pauses in front of your door. Should he just… go for it?

Wait. What if there's a password?? He had never bothered to ask if you had one. What would you think of him if he didn't even know the password to your room?!

He catches himself before he starts to hyperventilate. He has to be strong for you. Before he can talk himself out of it, he knocks on your door.

Your voice sounds out, muffled from the other side. “Who is it?”

“L-levi.” He curses himself silently for stuttering. It's silent for a while, and he thinks he hears you sniffle through the door.

“Fine, come in.”

Victory! He cracks open the door and steps through, shutting it behind him quickly. You sit on the floor surrounded by a mess of pink and white fabric, a dress mannequin toppled over in the corner of your room. You won't make eye contact with him, and he's fairly sure you've been crying.

“What happened?” That was a stupid question, wasn't it? He cringes and waits for you to yell at him.

“I, um… it's embarrassing.” You drop your head and fidget with one of the fabric strips on the floor. “I knew you were going to that F3 anime con in a couple months, and you talked about how excited you were for your Mister Boss costume from the Circle games, and I thought maybe you would let me go with you if I dressed up too. So I tried to make Ruri-chan’s costume. And… you can tell how that went.”

Levi listens intently. There's a lot of feelings making a mess of his brain right now, namely embarrassment, hope, and adoration. But the one that shone through all of those is sheer determination.

He knows exactly how devastating costume errors can be. He's been doing this for millennia and sometimes things still come out wrong. Right now you look like him when he had just started. He’d wanted so badly to look like his favorite character from Deathly Fight X that he had nearly given up on cosplay when the costume failed. If there was one thing he could help you with, it was this.

“We can fix this.” You look up at him, questioning. “Trust me. You have me on your side. I'd never let my Henry be defeated by a couple of petticoats.”

You laugh, and he decides that no matter how many hours it takes, he'll hear that sound from you again when all of this is done.

He makes an executive decision to move the project to his room, since the sewing machine would be too much of a chore to lug down the hall. He organizes your fabric onto the pattern you'd printed out online and gets to work. Layers of fabric whoosh by you as he focuses, using his tail to hold a pincushion. He uses the dress form for the first bit, but opts to have you wear it while he sews the details so that he can tailor the dress to you.

You blush furiously as his hands skim over your waist, pinning small pieces in place. You know he would never dare to be this close to you if he wasn't so concentrated. You try to breathe as quietly as possible, hoping to not break this spell over him.

After a few hours of work, silence only broken by Levi's muttering to himself, he asks you to put the dress on one final time. You catch a few quiet words about “no way it'll work”, but you choose to ignore them. You step into the bathroom to change, and when you come out, you're met with a stony-faced Leviathan.

Even his tail has stopped moving as his eyes rove over you.

You're just too cute. He doesn't miss the way a blush heats your cheeks, or the way you fidget with your hands as he inspects you. He wraps his tail around his legs to keep it from knocking anything over. He doesn't move, doesn't smile, doesn't say anything. If he lets even one action slip, he might just end up keeping you in his room forever.

How could he let you go to F3 now? All those nasty gamers, drooling all over you. They would love you, love to have you. But they couldn't have you. Just him. Him, you, and that dress.

He'll go to the convention with you, if it's what you really want. But he thinks it's well within his rights to growl at anyone who looks at you for too long. And if you ask, he'll just tell you that's what any self-respecting otaku would do for a Ruri-chan cosplayer as cute as you.

[onlyseokmins]

bereal • k.m.g.

Pairing: kim mingyu x fem!reader Genres: smut (minors dni!), established relationship!au, taking pics during sex!au Warnings: reader uses she/her pronouns and is referred to as a girl, consensual pictures during sex that are shared to friends lol, swearing, degradation, objectification (tiny), a lot of oral (m. receiving), rope play (reader is tied up), marking, tiny use of toys, teasing, edging (m. &f. receiving), prolly oral fixation tbh, mentions of fingering (f. receiving), mentions of overstim, me thinking I'm funny again as usual, and like "you better cum fast" kinda thing fjkdsj um pls lmk if i missed smth WC: 2.5k A/N: helloooo I had no idea what BeReal was so this was a bit of an experience 😬 would just like to thank @/princessbetsy123-blog for their patience and understanding, I hope I did well haha also omg tumblr user onlyseokmins is writing non-sub gyu? show-stopping (derogatory) also huge thank you to @a1sh1teruu for the mingyu pic! ❤️ @princessbetsy123-blog asked: can you do any member where his BEREAL goes off during sex and their friends react? The reader has hickies all over her chest and neck and is tied up?

Ding!

⚠️ Time to BeReal. ⚠️

• 2 min left to capture a BeReal and see what your friends are up to! •

"Would you look at that, baby? What perfect timing, d'ya wanna show everyone how pretty you look?"

Your butt rests gingerly against the back of your ankles, wrists bound together behind your back. The soft ropes limiting your arm movements match the ones winding across your body that Mingyu spent over half of the afternoon tying, untying, and tying again with his large-ass fingers until he was satisfied after reading detailed instructions from Minghao.

Finally able to perfect the multi-colored knots and ties that looked absolutely lecherous yet stunning across your naked body, rubbing and squeezing all the right places. It doesn't matter whether you remain still like the obedient slut you are or wriggle and writhe in anticipation of what the man's going to do next to thrillingly torture you, you felt their restriction.

"Yeah, Gyu."

"The prettiest," he murmurs, thumb slipping under the ropes that accentuate your breasts. Your posture is helpfully corrected and uplifts your chest in a flattering manner so he can nip and suck as he likes without you wiggling away.

You mewl at the binds tightening, arching your back as much as you can while he traces patterns connected by the harsh love bites you can feel littered across your skin that he'd left earlier. 

Your body aches pleasantly all over. Having been edged for hours by now, it was well into the evening after a combination of intense, loving foreplay and the still-buzzing vibrator abandoned on the bed sheets from the distracting notification chime of his phone instead. You lean into his tickling touch as it slides up your neck, following more bites that scream "Mine!" all over.

"Mine," he confirms aloud with a whisper. "Will you let me show them how true that fact is?"

"Only… only if you let me cum." 

Your eyes close as he holds your cheek tenderly and aims the phone's camera lens. A sheen of arousal sticks to your thighs and no doubt ruined the ties around them with how much of a mess he's created out of you.

"Of course, love. I'd be an incompetent fool if I didn't and couldn't make such a pretty thing like you cum at least once."

He should've thought of that earlier, is what you want to snark back but you're too desperate to give him any attitude for his blabberings. He would never deny you anything for too long anyways.

Though you take the opportunity to bite lightly on the knuckle of the finger that somehow pushes past your lips, grazing your upper teeth down until right before his nail bed begins, opting to suckle at the tip instead. Swirling it around languidly and sloppily, saliva coating every inch of his finger to soothe the stinging indentation marks you feel out with your tongue.

"Dirty girl."

"Mhm, but I'm your dirty girl."

"Damn right you are."

He knows what you're playing at, what you're trying to prove. The vixen-like gleam behind those fluttering eyelashes as you dare to smirk — releasing his finger with a sickening pop that his cock wishes was it instead.

But he manages to hold back, intent on finishing his own little game before he fucks you stupid so you can't continue to tease him like this.

"One minute left. What position do you think would look best? There are too many to decide from."

Ever the photographer, Mingyu groans because he's utterly turned on (and continues to lose his mind over how good you look) but also due to frustration (again, over how perfect you are from every angle) for you as his muse sources an ever-flowing spring of inspiration. A blessing and a curse.

He's moving back and forth across the mattress, unintentionally jostling your tied-up form with his large body. You dumbly choke out "dick" when he nearly falls into you with the usual Mingyu-clumsiness you know and love. Luckily he possesses the brain cell at the moment to connect the dots between his covered crotch nearly shoved right into your face versus you actually insulting him.

"Baby wants my dick?"

You nod fervently, wishing you could reach your hands out and grab it. Instead, you opt to open your mouth as wide as you've memorized the impressive width of his cock, tongue lolling out as well for the heavy weight of it.

Mingyu full on moans — loudly — at your frenzied eagerness. Watching hungrily as your lower body shifts and your thighs squeeze together, skin straining against the tightened constraints of the rope. Evidence of how much you want him shows all of your body. From your lidded gaze to your puffy, neglected clit he can just imagine prettily between your legs — and it makes his chest swell in pride. 

He's quick to shed his boxers and absolutely cannot resist a little love slap to your cheek with his throbbing, aching dick. Smugly painting your cheek with a shiny smear of precum and tapping your awaiting tongue teasingly, not letting your lips wrap around him. 

Yet.

The timer is set and so is Mingyu's mind.

But yours is as well.

"Damn it, thirty seconds and I can't decide what's best."

You watch in mild irritation at the way he holds his dick with a frown of renewed concentration, bringing it in and out of the frame of his phone lenses. It's like he's teasing you again but this time not on purpose, the leaking head of his cock bobbing closer and then away from you. 

While you normally admire his talents at getting perfect, incredible shots on the first take, the purpose of BeReal was authentic pictures within the randomly selected global, two-minute time slot. Mingyu's pride was always on the line for some reason (probably a stupid bet between the boys). Only one snapshot and never a second late but at this point, all you cared about and wanted was some action. 

You're aware of how turned on he already is, watching the occasional veined palm rubbing against the growing bulge in his boxers. Stroking at it in the same motions as the vibrator he'd teased you with. A new set-up like this excited him (and you), evident by the dark wet stain where the tip of his cock strains against the fabric of his underwear. 

So, when he draws closer again, you lunge forward almost losing your balance but that just works to your advantage as you practically swallow and then choke around his goshdarn dick. Incredibly adept from tons and tons of practice, size training, and testing with his large package pays off, working to your advantage without an insane amount of prep work.

Mingyu lets out a hiss, a crazed look of insanity mixed with lust, affection, and wonder swimming in his narrowed eyes. He runs his hands through the sweaty black bangs strewn across his forehead, meeting your pleading tear-filled gaze with a huff.

"What, does my baby think she can make me cum quick enough?"

You answer him with your actions, rather than wasting words because your mouth is stuffed full of cock anyways. Though it doesn't stop the filthy gags as you take him boldly down the throat, bobbing and nodding your head in what end up looking like successive 'yes' motions, intent on pushing him over that edge. 

"Yeah, just like the pretty whore she is."

And as Mingyu's pretty little whore, you know exactly what makes him tick — or cum, for that matter. 

Stilling your head and swallowing around him several times before you have to back off for air. Not leaving him unattended for too long, you start nuzzling the underside of his cock as you catch your breath. Licking between his balls and mouthing each one with some special attention to make up for the lacking use of your hands. Following the prominent vein that leads all the way up to his swollen tip, collecting salty excesses of precum with a promised swirl of your tongue.

Rinse and repeat.

You make a point to meet his gaze every time his eyes flutter open with the most babygirlism look you can attempt with a cock in your mouth. Not that it's too difficult to achieve with how much you want him to give into you. 

"Desperate little slut, you want me to feed you my cum, don'tcha?"

Despite his words, Mingyu's already shaking after only three smooth rounds of your perfect little mouth routine. Teasing, tiny variations and switch-ups to keep him guessing with that one brain cell that's deteriorating. His resolve, especially when it comes to you, is terribly weak and crumbling by the nanosecond. It doesn't matter how defined his six-pack is as it ripples with each shuddering intake of air he breathes in or those toned arms that twitch, bulging and flexing as he tries not to break the phone in one hand or rip out strands of hair with the other. 

Even his thighs are trembling like a newborn lamb. Oh, how you wish you could place your hands against them but watching the muscles ripple in front of your eyes is rewarding enough. Although, your neglected pussy aches and you can't help but lightly grind against the back of your own shins searching for some semblance of relief.

And when he takes notice of what you're doing, that alone is enough to tip Mingyu over the edge. You know it before he does.

"Gonna… god, gonna give it to you, pretty baby. Fill up that dirty mouth of yours."

The low and guttural moan of pleasure turns into a pathetic whine full of frustration because you completely abandon his cock. Leaning back and away, you watch with thirstful glee at the way it bobs up and down, a shining mess from precum and your spit. 

But little spurts of white pool out of his tip, a painfully slow and almost stilted release because of the sudden departure of your warm mouth. He growls your name and swears when all you do is lick your lips with a smirk like a cat that was asked if it ate the missing canary.

"Revenge," you manage to croak out with a sore throat.

"Revenge, my ass."

Mingyu can't complain all that much given what tortures he'd put you through earlier but that doesn't hide the cute little frowning pout on his handsome face. He has enough wherewithal to re-aim his phone with his thumb poised over the shutter-release button. Predicting what you want as you lean in once more, tongue hanging back out as you bat your eyelashes up at the camera and incidentally — at him.

He can't help but curse you out a bit like you always do at him when the situation was switched. Muttering the filthiest, most derogatory rambles that have the empty walls of your cunt fluttering as he furiously rubs his aching cock with a large hand that barely diminishes either's size.

Finally, the successive ropes of white you've been waiting for spurt out, painting your face and landing on your tongue just as you like it. And you grin salaciously at the click of the lenses capturing the depraved image. Not just of you tied up on your knees, hands behind your back, lips swollen, and pretty face covered in splatters of white but the front camera catches Mingyu — albeit, pretty blurrily — throwing his head back and biting his lip as he cums.

And within seconds of the timer running out, he presses 'post'. Tossing the phone on the bed and pushing you down, the side of your body hits the bouncy mattress at the same time the inanimate object does. Mingyu easily loosens the ties and knots with a surprising amount of vigor despite his harsh panting, a wild look in his eyes. The vibrator that's still buzzing is increased one intensity level and you shudder in anticipation.

"You were saying something about revenge?" he questions with snark, lifting your thigh with his free hand, the toy coming closer to your dripping center — far away enough that it's not even close to touching you and yet you can still feel the powerful vibrations at a distance buzzing through the airwaves. "Where's that cute confidence now? Just opening your legs like the desperate whore you always are, hm?"

He spends the rest of his time working you consistently up to that precipice before dropping you like an elevator without its wires, unable to crash over that peak of pleasure. As if he hadn't done it earlier.

Again and again, with his fingers and that stupid vibrator until his cock has sprung back to life (in reality, isn't too long and yet it feels like forever). And then you're screaming, creaming, squirting, crying, and cumming over and over. Making a complete mess as he pounds your poor weeping pussy until you nearly black out, the both of you ignoring (or not even noticing) the hundreds of notifications lighting up Mingyu's phone.

*the8thwonder used RealMoji, :hao_disgusted:*

cherrycheol: well damn wish i could take back the time i just spent wondering what was keeping him from being the first to post 🤦

> gam3rbo1: u know gyu will do it w/o fail

> joshuahhhhhh: leave it to him to not miss a moment no matter what he's up to 🥴

*tangerineboos used RealMoji, :mingyu_is_loser:*

tangerineboos: can i report them??

> tangerineboos: their account IS private right?

> jeonghangel: why report she's pretty 🥵💦

> jeonghangel: altho i'd prefer NOT to see gyu's nutting face

> jeonghangel: THAT'S reportable 😒

> gam3rbo1: gyu might hit u jeonghan

> jeonghangel: 🤷 im into that

> tangerineboos: 🤢🤕 i'd prefer not to see at all 

> black3y3: i could help u w/that 👍

> black3y3: isn't that how his gf's acct got banned 

> dinostar: yes i reported her bc i thought her acct got hacked

> dinostar: turns out they just wanted to share their porn but forgot they were public 😃

*w00z1 used RealMoji, :jihoon_disapproves_15:*

realtiger: i thought pussies were banned

> junhehe: technically no pussy is seen

> realtiger: 🧐 SORRY i wasn't looking that close 

> tangerineboos: does hoshi even know where or what the pussy is 😂🫵

> realtiger: yeah man there's 1 in wonwoo's moment as usual 🙄💀

> gam3rbo1: pls don't bring matilda into this her fur is too shiny for ur greasiness

> junhehe: 🫰 matilda deserves the world 

> gam3rbo1: dni if ur not a matilda stan or jun ❌

> tangerineboos: yeah geez hoshi if miss tilda is a pussy wouldn't that make you one too 🤡🫵

> gam3rbo1: 🤨 i just said dni

> realtiger: lies and false slander i'm a tiger

> tangeringeboos: 🥊exactly. ur a pussy lolol

> realtiger: brb gonna go fight boo 👊

cherrycheol: ^ they won't be missed

> gam3rbo1: ditto

> joshuahhhhhh: at least seok hasn't posted or my eardrums would be bleeding

> dk21897: ummmmmmmmmmmmmm

> gam3rbo1: ope

> jeonghangel: speak of the devil and he shall appear

> joshuahhhhhh: 😮‍💨 no somehow the pizza he quick ubered just arrived

> dk21897: 😭😭😭😭😭😭 it was late so I had to wait!

> junhehe: isn't bereal supposed to be authentic??????????????????

 > dk21897: why are you judging me when gyu is tying up his gf

 > dk21897: shoot i can't @ her acct

 > dk21897: BLINK TWICE IF U NEED HELP

> joshuahhhhhh: these noise canceling earbuds work wonders 10/10 rec

> jeonghangel: im sure she's just fine 🥴

 > dk21897: TMI

> jeonghangel: 🤷 u asked

By the time the boys have worked out their back-and-forth commentaries, you're laying in Mingyu's arms as he scrolls, occasionally showing you what they've said. Half-asleep, you snort, "Should we thank Hao for the help?"

"I mean we could, but he'll deny it all."

He does, of course, since it's a public announcement — and criticizes how Mingyu had tied the knots from what he can see. But he kindly sends a new resource PDF the next day, a sarcastic warning attached to keep such things private if the two of you don't want to be judged on your technique.

onlyseokmins: March 2023 ©