#and they’re allowed to be just as flawed as everyone else

[greniza]

One of the consistent elements of Human Domestication Guide is that the setting's core kinks are, in-universe, institutionalized and enforced to a greater or lesser degree depending on the story. To many people, those kinks are strange or off-putting, and the premise of being forced into such a situation is (understandably) horrifying. My first introduction to the universe was the original story, which can be (and was, by me) read as a character's life and mind being wrested from her control and sculpted by a malignant and alien entity with total technological and social power, transforming the previously defiant main character into a puppet whose new master could play with or discard as she saw fit. This is not to say the story is problematic -- fiction is fiction -- but it left a lasting impression of the canon that I'm sure others share. Such is the bitter taste present in-universe.

There are people that, upon hearing someone say "I like this" about anything, will turn around and say, "Wow, you like this? You want everyone to have this? I don't want this, and therefore you are a bad person for wanting to force me to have this." These people fail to appreciate that someone could conceive of having different preferences from them. The "but" is that, as mentioned before, the bitter institutionalization of the human domestication guide universe loads the statement "I want to live there" with subtext of allowing the HDG universe's subjugation upon the unfortunate listener so long as the speaker gets to live there too.

The speaker's belief is that the subjugation of the HDG universe would be an abhorrent experience. I would agree with previous' post that it is about control, and that evaluating control and self-determination as moral goods isn't necessarily correct. I propose that while seeking control or it's simulacrums may be irrational, it is a survival instinct. If I had the ability to wave my hand, say "abracadabra," and cause anything material I imagined to come to pass, I might not be happier, but I would definitely never go hungry, and things that I noticed hurting me would evaporate. With more money, more time, more this, more that, one is necessarily able to do more. In previous's example, they trade their choice of food for automatic, free, and instant preparation; this is an increase of agency for previous and a loss of agency for another. So, previous would opt in, and someone else wouldn't.

This survival instinct extends to hypothetical considerations of the HDG universe. "What if," a skeptic might ask, "I was assigned an affini who's just sadistic and likes it when I suffer? In-universe, I'm powerless. I have no recourse! That would be awful!" and that skeptic would be correct! They would have no recourse. Such is necessarily the framing of the setting. The problem, reassures canon, is the premise of the hypothetical. There are no evil affini. All are very long-term thinkers with the happiness of the organisms they care for as the top priority. There are no need for checks, balances, or anything that could impede them, as they are as pure as angels while working in groups. This is almost paradoxical; the affini are characterized as big, weird-looking plantpeople, but still people. People, as you or I know, tend to suck and be awful, to take things for themselves at the cost of others. They’re so like us in some ways that they must be like us in every way. Furthermore, the individual characterization of affini often comes to friction with this overarching premise, as individual affini are clever and good, but still undeniably people and still undeniably flawed.

Truthfully, subscribing to the paradox of affini being both comprehensible and benevolent requires effort and a willingness to suspend disbelief for the sake of fiction. If the affini are truly people with flaws and shortcomings, as compelling narratives often require them to be, then they cannot be perfect in the way that canon demands they be. But, in order for canon to not be a narrative idealizing giving "good-intentioned" authoritarians unchecked power, the benevolence of affini must be the case. To quote, of all things, the Federalist papers, "If angels were to govern men, neither external nor internal controls on government would be necessary."

HDG critics do not have investment in the setting sufficient to justify upholding suspension of disbelief in the face of narratives they view as unsettling, while fans of the setting are able to justify this suspension due to their enjoyment of the works therein.

Is HDG problematic? Again, it's a work of fiction with a subjective interpretation. The setting explores a reversal of the survival instinct to seize control, with payouts to protagonists for doing so. Equally, the setting explores a universe where throwing oneself prostrate at the feet of an imperialist conqueror yields great rewards. It serves as a vehicle for critique of the modern system where your choice is to either submit or suffer; a system which advertises itself as at least having a choice. Ultimately, though, the core of Human Domestication Guide is the kink. It's fiction, not reality. Judging engagement with a fictional work, especially one centered around kink, is silly.

A critique I've seen of HDG is "you'd have no control over your life" and idk, I feel like I have so little control over my life now.

the main difference is here it's due to capitalism, ableism, and transphobia and I have to largely take care of myself. Whereas in HDG, I would be fed, clothed, my disabilities accommodated for, my transition would be done in a week And I'd have a large hot plant person caring for me the entire time.

If I'd have no control over my life, at least HDG is safe and sexy

[faerygardenparty]

I’m gonna be so honest I’m never gonna be able to stop thinking about Jordan Li as a character because not only are they the only character in any mainstream media that I’ve ever seen whose openly and explicitly bigender they’re also portrayed just so well?? I don’t know how to explain it but like fuck I’ve never felt so represented by a character before

[blueforester]

Idk I would post about how much fun I’ve been having with Starfield but everyone who’s never played it and doesn’t know anything about it seems to be having such a good time jerking themselves off about how much of a flop it is that it would feel rude to interrupt

[aeth-eris]

★ chiron in the 1st house ★ you’ve carried the weight of feeling like you’ll never be enough. it’s like the world takes one look at you and decides you’re wrong, flawed, too much or not enough, all at the same time. so you build walls, armor yourself in masks, trying to be what they want, but deep down, you’re still waiting—waiting for someone to see the real you and not run away. you’re scared they never will. but what if you’re already enough, just as you are? what if the person you’ve been hiding is the one who deserves the love you’ve always given to everyone else?

★ chiron in aries ★ you’ve spent your whole life fighting to prove that you’re worthy of being here, of taking up space. somewhere along the way, someone made you feel like you weren’t strong enough, brave enough, or capable enough. now, every step forward feels like a battle, even when no one’s fighting you. but what if you didn’t have to fight anymore? what if you could lay down your armor and still be safe? you’ve always been enough—just as you are, without the fight.

★ chiron in the 2nd house ★ there’s this ache inside you, a quiet voice that whispers you’ll never have enough, never be enough. maybe it started when you were young, watching others have what you couldn’t, feeling like you were on the outside looking in. and now, you tie your worth to things—money, possessions, accomplishments—hoping they’ll fill the emptiness. but they never do. the truth is, you’ve been enough all along. you were never meant to prove your value to anyone. you just forgot how to see it for yourself.

★ chiron in taurus ★ you’ve tied your worth to the things you have—or the things you’ve lost. maybe you’ve never felt like you had enough, or maybe you’ve clung too tightly to what you did, fearing it could slip through your fingers. but it’s not about what you own, who you impress, or how others see you. you are enough, just as you are. the love, the security, the beauty you’ve been searching for? it’s been inside you all along.

★ chiron in the 3rd house ★ words have always felt heavy, haven’t they? like no matter what you say, it’s never the right thing. you’ve been silenced, misunderstood, maybe even laughed at for speaking your truth. so now, you second-guess yourself, swallow the words that ache to be spoken. but here’s the thing—your voice is a gift. it deserves to be heard, even if it shakes. and the people who matter? they’re the ones who will listen, not just to your words, but to your heart.

★ chiron in gemini ★ your words have been silenced, twisted, or ignored, haven’t they? you’ve spent so much time wondering if you’re smart enough, eloquent enough, if you’ll ever truly be heard. sometimes, it feels safer not to speak at all. but your voice matters. your thoughts matter. the world needs what you have to say, even if it takes time to find the right words. start with the truth in your heart—that’s enough.

★ chiron in the 4th house ★ home is supposed to be a sanctuary, but for you, it’s always been complicated. maybe you’ve felt like you didn’t belong, like love came with conditions, like you had to earn your place even in your own family. and now, the idea of safety feels foreign, a dream you’re too scared to believe in. but you can create your own home, a place where you’re finally enough. because you are enough. you always have been.

★ chiron in cancer ★ you’ve craved love and safety more than anything, but it always feels just out of reach. maybe your family didn’t give you the care you needed, or maybe you’ve spent your life trying to be strong for everyone else, hoping someone would finally hold you the way you’ve held them. it’s okay to let yourself be soft, to need, to want. you don’t have to be everything for everyone. you’re allowed to ask for love too.

★ chiron in the 5th house ★ you’ve been told you shouldn’t shine, that your creativity, your joy, your love of life wasn’t good enough. maybe you stopped trying, stopped creating, stopped believing that you deserved to be seen. but there’s a fire in you, a spark that’s never gone out, even if it’s small right now. it’s waiting for you to tend to it, to nurture it, to believe in it again. you deserve to take up space. you deserve to shine.

★ chiron in leo ★ there’s a little part of you that’s always felt unseen, isn’t there? like no matter how brightly you shine, no one’s really looking. maybe they told you to dim your light, or maybe you told yourself it wasn’t worth trying anymore. but the world needs your spark. it needs your warmth, your creativity, your joy. you were born to be seen, to inspire, to lead. don’t let the fear of rejection keep you in the shadows.

★ chiron in the 6th house ★ you’ve worked yourself to the bone, haven’t you? always trying to prove your worth through what you do, what you give, how useful you can be. but no one notices the cracks forming, the quiet desperation for someone to tell you it’s okay to rest. you’ve been carrying so much for so long, and it’s breaking you. you’re allowed to put it down. you’re allowed to take care of yourself.

★ chiron in virgo ★ you’ve spent so much time trying to be perfect, haven’t you? trying to fix yourself, fix others, fix everything. but no matter how much you do, it never feels like it’s enough. the cracks still show, and you hate yourself for them. but those cracks? that’s where the light gets in. healing isn’t about being flawless—it’s about being whole. and you, even with your imperfections, are whole.

★ chiron in the 7th house ★ love has always been a battlefield for you, hasn’t it? you give and give, hoping someone will finally stay, but they don’t. or maybe they do, but it feels like pieces of you get lost along the way. you wonder if you’re too broken to be loved the way you dream of. but you’re not. the love you’ve been searching for is the one you can give to yourself. when you find it, everything else will fall into place.

★ chiron in libra ★ you’ve bent over backward to keep the peace, haven’t you? given so much of yourself away just to make others happy, to feel loved. but deep down, you wonder—what about me? who’s going to make me feel whole? you’ve been so busy holding everything together that you forgot you deserve balance too. your needs, your desires—they matter. it’s time to stop pouring from an empty cup and let yourself be held.

★ chiron in the 8th house ★ loss has followed you, hasn’t it? betrayal, pain, and wounds so deep they feel like they’ve carved pieces out of your soul. you’ve built walls, shut people out, convinced yourself that no one can be trusted, not even yourself. but healing doesn’t mean forgetting the pain—it means transforming it. you have the power to turn your scars into strength. you just have to let yourself feel again.

★ chiron in scorpio ★ you’ve been broken in ways that words can’t describe. you’ve felt the sting of betrayal, the ache of loss, the darkness that feels like it will swallow you whole. and now, you guard yourself, scared to trust, scared to let anyone see just how deep your wounds go. but there’s strength in vulnerability, in letting yourself feel. you have the power to turn your pain into something beautiful, something that heals—not just you, but everyone you touch.

★ chiron in the 9th house ★ they made you feel small, didn’t they? like your dreams were too big, your beliefs too naive. so you stopped reaching, stopped hoping, stopped believing in the magic you once saw in the world. but that magic hasn’t left you. it’s still there, waiting for you to reach for it again. your dreams are valid. your truth is valid. and you are more than enough to bring them to life.

★ chiron in sagittarius ★ your soul is a wanderer, always searching for truth, for meaning, for freedom. but somewhere along the way, someone clipped your wings, made you feel like your dreams were too big or your beliefs were too naive. now, you doubt yourself, your path, your right to take up space in the world. but you were born to expand, to explore, to teach and inspire. the answers you seek are already within you—trust yourself enough to follow them.

★ chiron in the 10th house ★ you’ve carried the weight of expectations, trying to prove your worth through accomplishments and success. but no matter how much you achieve, it never feels like enough. the fear of failure haunts you, and the pressure is suffocating. but you’re not just what you do. you’re so much more. you don’t have to carry this alone anymore. you deserve to be seen for who you are, not just what you accomplish.

★ chiron in capricorn ★ you’ve carried the weight of the world for as long as you can remember. responsibility, expectations, pressure—they’ve followed you everywhere, whispering that you’ll never be enough unless you succeed. but the truth is, your worth isn’t tied to your achievements. you don’t have to climb every mountain to prove you belong. you’re already worthy, just as you are. let yourself rest. let yourself breathe. you’ve earned it.

★ chiron in the 11th house ★ you’ve always felt like an outsider, haven’t you? like no matter where you go, you don’t quite belong. you long for connection, but you’ve been hurt before, so you keep people at a distance. you deserve to be loved for who you are, exactly as you are. your tribe is out there, waiting for you to find them. but first, you have to believe you’re worthy of being part of something bigger.

★ chiron in aquarius ★ you’ve always felt a little out of place, haven’t you? like no matter where you go, you don’t quite belong. people may admire your uniqueness, but you wonder if they’ll ever truly accept you for who you are. you’ve tried to blend in, but it only made you feel more invisible. your healing comes when you stop trying to fit in and start embracing the beautiful, one-of-a-kind soul you’ve always been. your tribe will find you when you show up as yourself.

★ chiron in the 12th house ★ your pain is quiet, almost invisible. it lives in the shadows, buried so deep that even you can’t always find it. you’ve spent your life carrying wounds you didn’t deserve, and sometimes it feels like the weight of the world is on your shoulders. but you’re not alone, even when it feels like you are. your healing is in the light, in letting yourself be seen, even by yourself.

★ chiron in pisces ★ you’ve felt everything so deeply, haven’t you? the pain of the world, the heartbreak of those you love, the ache of wounds that aren’t even yours to carry. sometimes, it feels like drowning, like you’ll never come up for air. but your sensitivity is your strength—it’s what makes you a healer, a dreamer, a creator of worlds. just remember: you don’t have to save everyone. sometimes, the one who needs saving is you.

[anim-ttrpgs]

Disabilities and Monsters in Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy

Through a discussion with @vixensdungeon (great blog to follow for TTRPG stuff by the way) it came to our attention that some of our more jokey and memey posts and reblogs may have given some people a slightly skewed idea of what Eureka, and particularly the “urban fantasy” parts of Eureka are really about, and its tone. We like to joke around about it, and the “cute monster girl” angle really sells on tumblr.com, but actually playing these types of characters in Eureka is not exactly a power fantasy. They eat people, and often eat them alive. If you find that cute, funny, and/or sexy, well, Eureka is still probably just the game you’re looking for, but that isn’t the main thing. Eureka uses the fact that many of these characters necessarily subsist off the flesh and/or blood of other people as a loose metaphor for mental and physical disability.

Imagine you need something that everyone else has but you don’t. If you don’t have it regularly, you will literally start to waste away. The only way to obtain this thing is to take it from another human being, who also needs it, and others will deny that you need it, and abhor that you need it. It’s not uncommon for people, even “progressive” people, to say something along the lines of “they need to all be killed for the good of society,” even if they don’t realize that’s what they’re saying. You didn’t choose to be this way. This is the reality of monsters in Eureka, and many people in real life.

And then even when you have that thing you need, for now, there are many facets of society that you just can’t participate in because your condition makes them impossible for you, like if a vampire wanted to take a run on a sunny beach. Monsters in Eureka will be challenged by their supernatural weaknesses at every turn, while hiding their abhorrent needs from society and even the rest of the party, and asking why they have to be this way. Finding clever ways to get around and circumvent their weaknesses is a core part of the gameplay of monster PCs in Eureka. Imagine you and your friends want or need to go somewhere, but that somewhere is on the other side of a river. The river has a well maintained bridge. For everyone else but you, a vampire who can’t cross running water, getting across the river is the simplest task in the world, so much so that no one would even consider it a task, but for you, it’s a challenge, and for gameplay, it’s a puzzle.

It isn’t totally hopeless, as many of the jokes and fan comics show (those aren’t just memes, they’re only showing one side of the coin and not the other). Monsters who accept, or even embrace and celebrate their monsterhood, can and do exist canonically, alongside monsters who can’t bear to do what they do. In some cases, these may be the same monster on different days.

I’m going to conclude this post by posting two excerpts from the rules text itself.

Disabilities are Disabling

So why don’t disabilities grant any advantage? It isn’t too uncommon for RPGs to have some sort of “flaw” system, where during character creation you can give your character “flaws” or some kind of penalty, and usually get that balanced out by being able to add extra bonuses elsewhere. Sometimes, these “flaws” may take the form of disabilities.

One particular high-profile indie TTRPG takes this beyond just character creation, and makes it so that if a PC receives a “scar” in combat that reduces their physical stats, their mental stats automatically go up by an equivalent amount, and proudly imply that to make any mechanic which results in permanent consequences or makes disabilities disabling is ableist. We think you can probably tell what we think of that from this sentence alone, and we don’t need to elaborate too much. 

We do think, in the abstract, “flaw” systems in character creation are not a bad idea. They allow for more varied options during character creation, while preserving game balance between the PCs.

But in real life, people aren’t balanced. The events that left me injured and disabled didn’t make me smarter or better in any way - if anything, they probably made me dumber, considering the severity of the concussion! Some things happened to me, and now I’m worse. There’s no upside, I just have to keep going, trying harder with a less efficient body, and relying more on others in situations where I am no longer capable of perfect self-sufficiency.

A disabled person is, by definition, less able to perform important daily tasks than the average person. To deny this is to deny that they need help, and to deny that they need help is to enable a refusal to help. This is the perspective from which Eureka’s Grievous Wounds mechanic was written.

When a character is reduced to 1 HP (which by design can result from a single hit from many weapons) they may become incapacitated or they may take a Grievous Wound, which is a permanent injury with no stat benefits. Grievous Wounds don’t have to result from combat, they can also be given to a character during character creation, but not as a trade-off for an extra bonus.

“But then doesn’t my character just have worse stats than the rest of the party?” Yes, haven’t you been reading this? There is no benefit, except for the opportunity to play a disabled character in an TTRPG. This character will probably have to be more reliant on the rest of the party to get by in various situations. Is that a bad thing?

Monsters Essay

All investigators in Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy are regular people. They can also be a monster, like a blood-sucking vampire or a broom-riding witch. Importantly, this works because despite their unique nature, monsters are still regular people. You can read more about this in Chapter 8, but the setting of Eureka does not have a conspiracy or “masquerade” hiding supernatural people from normal society. Though they are still largely unknown to modern science, they exist within normal society - and a lot of them eat people.

The default assumption in RPGs has been that monsters are just evil by nature, doing evil for evil’s sake. RPGs that seek to subvert this expectation often instead make monsters misunderstood and wrongfully persecuted, but harmless. Eureka takes a wholly different approach.

There are five playable types of monsters in the rulebook right now, and it’ll be seven if we hit all the stretch goals, but for simplicity’s sake this discussion of themes will just focus on the vampire. Despite them applying in different ways, the same overall themes apply to nearly every monster, so if you get the themes for the vampire, you’ll get the gist of what Eureka is doing with its playable monsters in general.

Mundane investigators have to keep themselves going by eating food and sleeping (see p.XX “Composure” for more information). Well, vampires can’t operate the same way. They don’t sleep, and normal food might be tasty for them as long as it isn’t too heavily seasoned, but it doesn’t do anything for them nutritionally. Their main way to keep themselves functioning is fresh living human blood, straight from the source. To do what mundane PCs do normally by just eating and sleeping, vampires have to take from another, whether either of them are happy with this arrangement or not. They do not, of course, literally have to, and a player is not forced to make their vampire PC drink blood, just like you reading this in real life don’t literally have to eat food. You do eat food if you want to live in any degree of comfort or happiness, and vampires do drink blood or they eventually become unable to effectively do anything.

This is numerically, mechanically incentivized and not simply a rule that says something like “this character is a vampire and therefore they must drink blood once every session,” to demonstrate that the circumstances a person faces drive their behavior. In America, there is a tendency to think of criminality and harm done to others as resulting from intrinsic evil, but people do not just wake up one day and decide “I think I’ll go down the criminal life path.” Their circumstances have barred them from the opportunities that would have given them other options. 

People need food; food costs money; money requires work; work requires getting hired; but getting hired requires a nearby job opening, an education, an impressive resume, nice clothes, charisma, consistent transportation, and so on. For people without other options, crime becomes the only method left to meet their basic needs. Would you rather take what you need from other people, or go without what you need? There are people who don’t have the luxury of a third option. Failure to meet the needs of even a small number of people in a society has high potential to harm the entire society, not just those individuals whose needs are unmet.

As their basic need for blood becomes more and more difficult to ignore, a vampire is going to encounter much the same dilemma. There is really no “legal” or “harmless” way for them to get their needs met, even if they do have resources. Society just isn’t set up for that. And no, your kink is not the solution to this, trying to suggest every vampire just find willing participants who are turned on by vampires or being bitten is suggesting sex work. It’s one step removed from telling a girl she should just get an OnlyFans the minute she turns 18, or that women should just marry a rich man and be a housewife that gets their needs taken care of in exchange for sex and housekeeping. Being forced into such a dynamic isn’t ethical or harmless for the vampire or for their “clients.”

“Oh well, then the vampire should just eat bad people!” You mean those same bad people we just described above? Who gets to decide which people are “bad people?” Who gets to decide that the punishment is assault or death?

Playable monsters in Eureka are dangerous, harmful people. They were set up to be.

Society not being set up in a way that allows monsters to make ethical choices brings us to the next theme: monstrousness as disability, and monsters as “takers.”

Vampires have to take from others a valuable resource that everyone needs to live, and the extraction of which is excruciatingly painful and debilitating. No one knows what happens to blood after a vampire drinks it, it’s just gone. Vampires are open wounds through which blood pours out of the universe.

This is a special need, something they have to take but cannot give back. Their special needs make them literally a drain on society and the people around them. In the modern world, there is a tendency to feel that people must justify their right to life, that they must pay for the privilege of existing in society. This leads people to consider “takers” (people who take much more than they give back, such as disabled people) as something that needs to be pruned away for the betterment of everyone else. Even many so-called “progressives,” while they claim not to agree with pruning “useless eaters,” still hold the unexamined belief that people must justify their existence. To reconcile these two incompatible ideas, they instead simply deny that disabled people take more resources than most people, and are capable of giving back less. This sentiment is perfectly illustrated by the aforementioned game’s insistence that disabilities are never a net reduction of a character’s stats.

Vampires and other playable monsters are inarguably “takers,” but in positioning them as protagonists right alongside mundane protagonists, Eureka puts you in their shoes, and forces you to acknowledge their inner lives and reckon with their circumstances. You have to acknowledge two things: first, that they are dangerous, that they are harmful, that they take more than they give - and second, that they are people. Because they are people, Eureka asserts that they have inherent value, a right to exist, and a right to do what they need to do to exist. (We also acknowledge that their potential victims have a right to do what they need to do to exist and defend themselves, but that is a separate discussion.)

One final point to touch on is mental illness. Mental illness is a disability, one pretty comparable to physical disability in a lot of ways, so all of the above points can apply to this metaphor as well, but there are a few unique comparisons to make here.

It’s not the most efficient, but there are a couple of loopholes deliberately left in the rules that allow vampires to sometimes sporadically restore Composure (and thus their ability to function) without drinking blood. Eureka! moments and Comfort checks from fellow investigators can restore Composure.

When writing the rules, we came to a dilemma where we weren’t sure if it was thematically appropriate for monsters to be able to regain Composure in these ways (since it could lessen their reliance on causing harm), but ultimately we decided that yes, they can.

People with mental illnesses may have the potential to be harmful and dangerous, but all the information we have access to has shown that mentally ill people with robust support structures and control over their own lives are much less likely to enact harm, whether through physical violence, relational violence, or violence against the self. This is why we kept that rule in for playable monsters. Being able to accomplish their goals, and having friends who are there for them, makes that person less likely to cause unnecessary harm.

Vampires are especially great for demonstrating this because they’re immortal and they always come back when “killed.” They can’t be exterminated, they aren’t going away, there will always be problem people in society, no matter how utopian or “progressive.” Vampires are a never-ending curse, who will always be a problem whether they like it or not. The question is how you will grapple with their inevitable presence in society and how you will treat them, not how you will get rid of them.

Eureka is as much a study of the characters themselves as it is the mystery being solved by the characters. It is a game about harsh realities, but it is ultimately compassionate. It argues through its own gameplay that yes, people do have circumstances which drive their behavior, people do have special needs that are beyond their ability to reciprocate, many of those people do cause harm or inconvenience to others, and all of them are still valuable. 

Elegantly designed and thoroughly playtested, Eureka represents the culmination of three years of near-daily work from our team, as well as a lot of our own money. If you’re just now reading this and learning about Eureka for the first time, you missed the crowdfunding window unfortunately, but you can still check out the public beta on itch.io to learn more about what Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy actually is, as that is where we have all the fancy art assets, the animated trailer, links to video reviews by podcasts and youtubers, etc.!

You can also follow updates on our Kickstarter page where we post regular updates on the status of our progress finishing the game and getting it ready for final release.

Beta Copies through the Patreon

If you want more, you can download regularly updated playable beta versions of Eureka: Investigative Urban Fantasy earlier, plus extra content such as adventure modules by subscribing to our Patreon at the $5 tier or higher. Subscribing to our patreon also grants you access to our patreon discord server where you can talk to us directly and offer valuable feedback on our progress and projects.

The A.N.I.M. TTRPG Book Club

If you would like to meet the A.N.I.M. team and even have a chance to play Eureka with us, you can join the A.N.I.M. TTRPG Book Club discord server. It’s also just a great place to talk and discuss TTRPGs, so there is no schedule obligation, but the main purpose of it is to nominate, vote on, then read, discuss, and play different indie TTRPGs. We put playgroups together based on scheduling compatibility, so it’s all extremely flexible. This is a free discord server, separate from our patreon exclusive one. https://discord.gg/7jdP8FBPes

Other Stuff

We also have a ko-fi and merchandise if you just wanna give us more money for any reason.

We hope to see you there, and that you will help our dreams come true and launch our careers as indie TTRPG developers with a bang by getting us to our base goal and blowing those stretch goals out of the water, and fight back against WotC's monopoly on the entire hobby. Wish us luck.

[byoldervine]

Writing Tips - Beating Perfectionism

1. Recognising writing perfectionism. It’s not usually as literal as “This isn’t 100% perfect and so it is the worst thing ever”, in my experience it usually sneaks up more subtly. Things like where you should probably be continuing on but if you don’t figure out how to word this paragraph better it’s just going to bug you the whole time, or where you’re growing demotivated because you don’t know how to describe the scene 100% exactly as you can imagine it in your head, or things along those lines where your desire to be exact can get in the way of progression. In isolated scenarios this is natural, but if it’s regularly and notably impacting your progress then there’s a more pressing issue

2. Write now, edit later. Easier said than done, which always infuriated me until I worked out how it translates into practice; you need to recognise what the purpose of this stage of the writing process is and when editing will hinder you more than help you. Anything up to and including your first draft is purely done for structural and creative purposes, and trying to impose perfection on a creative process will naturally stifle said creativity. Creativity demands the freedom of imperfection

3. Perfection is stagnant. We all know that we have to give our characters flaws and challenges to overcome since, otherwise, there’s no room for growth or conflict or plot, and it ends up being boring and predictable at best - and it’s just the same as your writing. Say you wrote the absolute perfect book; the perfect plot, the perfect characters, the perfect arcs, the perfect ending, etc etc. It’s an overnight bestseller and you’re discussed as a literary great for all time. Everyone, even those outside of your target demographic, call it the perfect book. Not only would that first require you to turn the perfect book into something objective, which is impossible, but it would also mean that you would either never write again, because you can never do better than your perfect book, or you’ll always write the exact same thing in the exact same way to ensure constant perfection. It’s repetitive, it’s boring, and all in all it’s just fearful behaviour meant to protect you from criticism that you aren’t used to, rather than allowing yourself to get acclimated to less than purely positive feedback

4. Faulty comparisons. Comparing your writing to that of a published author’s is great from an analytical perspective, but it can easily just become a case of “Their work is so much better, mine sucks, I’ll never be as good as them or as good as any ‘real’ writer”. You need to remember that you’re comparing a completely finished draft, which likely underwent at least three major edits and could have even had upwards of ten, to wherever it is you’re at. A surprising number of people compare their *first* draft to a finished product, which is insanity when you think of it that way; it seems so obvious from this perspective why your first attempt isn’t as good as their tenth. You also end up comparing your ability to describe the images in your head to their ability to craft a new image in your head; I guarantee you that the image the author came up with isn’t the one their readers have, and they’re kicking themselves for not being able to get it exactly as they themselves imagine it. Only the author knows what image they’re working off of; the readers don’t, and they can imagine their own variation which is just as amazing

5. Up close and too personal. Expanding on the last point, just in general it’s harder to describe something in coherent words than it is to process it when someone else prompts you to do so. You end up frustrated and going over it a gazillion times, even to the point where words don’t even look like words anymore. You’ve got this perfect vision of how the whole story is supposed to go, and when you very understandably can’t flawlessly translate every single minute detail to your satisfaction, it’s demotivating. You’re emotionally attached to this perfect version that can’t ever be fully articulated through any other medium. But on the other hand, when consuming other media that you didn’t have a hand in creating, you’re viewing it with perfectly fresh eyes; you have no ‘perfect ideal’ of how everything is supposed to look and feel and be, so the images the final product conjures up become that idealised version - its no wonder why it always feels like every writer except you can pull off their visions when your writing is the only one you have such rigorous preconceived notions of

6. That’s entertainment. Of course writing can be stressful and draining and frustrating and all other sorts of nasty things, but if overall you can’t say that you ultimately enjoy it, you’re not writing for the right reasons. You’ll never take true pride in your work if it only brings you misery. Take a step back, figure out what you can do to make things more fun for you - or at least less like a chore - and work from there

7. Write for yourself. One of the things that most gets to me when writing is “If this was found and read by someone I know, how would that feel?”, which has lead me on multiple occasions to backtrack and try to be less cringe or less weird or less preachy or whatever else. It’s harder to share your work with people you know whose opinions you care about and whose impressions of you have the potential of shifting based on this - sharing it to strangers whose opinions ultimately don’t matter and who you’ll never have to interact with again is somehow a lot less scary because their judgements won’t stick. But allowing the imaginary opinions of others to dictate not even your finished project, but your unmoderated creative process in general? Nobody is going to see this without your say so; this is not the time to be fussing over how others may perceive your writing. The only opinion that matters at this stage is your own

8. Redirection. Instead of focusing on quality, focusing on quantity has helped me to improve my perfectionism issues; it doesn’t matter if I write twenty paragraphs of complete BS so long as I’ve written twenty paragraphs or something that may or may not be useful later. I can still let myself feel accomplished regardless of quality, and if I later have to throw out whole chapters, so be it

9. That’s a problem for future me. A lot of people have no idea how to edit, or what to look for when they do so, so having a clear idea of what you want to edit by the time the editing session comes around is gonna be a game-changer once you’re supposed to be editing. Save the clear work for when you’re allocating time for it and you’ll have a much easier and more focused start to the editing process. It’ll be more motivating than staring blankly at the intimidating word count, at least

10. The application of applications. If all else fails and you’re still going back to edit what you’ve just wrote in some struggle for the perfect writing, there are apps and websites that you can use that physically prevent you from editing your work until you’re done with it. If nothing else, maybe it can help train you away from major edits as you go

[you-dance-with-the-skeleton]

Me: I think I’m so viscerally uncomfortable with people acknowledging that Stanley might be as intelligent/more intelligent in some ways than Stanford because it makes Stanford so replaceable. I mean, Stanley is worth so much. The twins adore him. He’s so lovable and good to others. He’s charismatic, resourceful, scrappy, a wonderful parental figure, a truly driven person who could overcome anything if he had a reason to, and his positive traits vastly outweigh his flaws. Ford deserves his one thing. Stanley also having that one thing makes Ford obsolete.

The otherworldly therapist over my shoulder: Do you think that Stanford’s *only* good quality is his intelligence? Do you believe that if he wasn’t the smartest person in the room, he’d be entirely worthless?

Me, visibly sweating: Well, a bit? Yes? He has other qualities, sure, but none of them are nearly as valuable. None of them make him stand out as a person, or would allow him to compete with others. Anyone else could have those traits.

Therapist, reflecting my own face back to me: What about his creativity? His ability to tell stories? His art? His loyalty to those he trusts? His intuition? The care he also shows to his family? His survival skills? His own ability to endure hardship? Are those not worth appreciation?

Me, slapping at the spectral projection like a swarm of flies: Like I said, those are good qualities, but they’re also ones he shares. You could find a hundred people who could be as creative, or as enduring, or as loving, or anything else.

Therapist, reforming into a sentient cloud of mist: Why does he have to compete? Everyone has unique traits, yes, but everyone shares their traits too. You couldn’t name me a single trait that Stanley has that no one else in the cast also displays. Why hold Stanford to that standard and no one else?

Me:

Therapist: Do *you* believe that without your intelligence, you’d become replaceable?

Me:

Therapist: Failure has to be acceptable. As uncomfortable as that is, it just has to be. Your loved ones should value you regardless.

Me:

Therapist: Can you imagine Mabel or Stan or Dipper abandoning Ford just because he got something wrong? No. He gets many things wrong. So do you. You won’t be left behind either.

Me:

Therapist: The promise of knowing the answer every single time is always going to be a lie. That’s the point. You fell for it. You need to unlearn that, because it never ends well.

Me: … Can we go back to talking about toxic old man yaoi?

Therapist: yea sure.

[takatul]

Twisted Wonderland self-aware!Yuu except they’re empathic.

When I say self-aware!Yuu I don’t mean a scenario where Yuu transmigrated into Twisted Wonderland with memories intact.

When I say self-aware!Yuu I mean someone who knows themselves better than anyone else.

They know they have flaws. They know that, sometimes, their flaws will get in the way. Whether it’s shutting down emotionally, not being able to express themselves properly, or something to do with a physical ability. Their flaws will always follow them around. Even in Twisted Wonderland.

And yet, self-aware!Yuu is still kind. Still loving all of their strengths and flaws.

Ace needing a place to stay after Riddle off’d-his-head? “Yes, of course you can sleepover.”

Deuce breaking down after letting his delinquent side out? “No, you’re not a bad guy— you just protected me and Grim from those bullies!”

Riddle having a crisis after his overblot? “I don’t accept your apology. Not yet at least. But I can understand why acted this way… you’re allowed to feel angry about your past. You didn’t deserve that kind of treatment.”

No matter how wrong the opponent is, self-aware!Yuu always empathizes with them in the end.

Maybe one day, someone confronts them about it. I can see Leona or Azul or Rollo and maybe Jamil. They’re people who have experienced and or seen how terrible people can be.

“Why are you so nice all the time? You’re too thought. Too kind. Good people like you always end up last.”

Perhaps self-aware!Yuu will look at them with a stoic face. Perhaps a shocked expression, accompanied by a frantic gasp. Perhaps even small laugh at their question. And just as the confronting student was about to retort again, self-aware!Yuu will smile.

“Well, I’m not a good person. I just do what I think is right.”

Self-aware!Yuu will sit down, watching activities unfold around them— heart still bursting full of kindness. They’ll pat the empty space beside them. An invitation, but it’s up to the student to take the initiative.

“It’s everyone’s first time living after all. May as well make it kind.”

Soon enough, if the student plucks their courage, they’ll sit and slowly learn how to become self-aware too.

banner credit: @bunnysrph

[arcanarix]

Make That Double, Ch2 - Yan!SatoSugu X Fem!Reader [AO3]

Word Count: 6.8K

Warnings (for this chapter): mutual mastuurbation (btwn stsg), non-con, cunnilingus, panty gags, bondage (chains), deaths

Geto meets with Gojo during times where it’s feasible, which is becoming more and more of a rarity these days. While it’s not like the higher-ups can do much about it even if Gojo gets caught, Geto isn’t fond of the idea of him having to clean up a mess he’s caused all on his own accord.

“What’re you staring at me for? Want to go another round, or…?” Satoru snags him out of his thoughts, and Geto shakes his head, nuzzling his face into Satoru’s neck as they’re tangled up in each other in bed, their breaths and heartbeats in sync. He’s told the girls he might be held up a little longer than expected, and thus Suda is supervising them to ensure they’re not up to the wrong kind of mischief while he’s absent. He has a feeling that the girls are already suspecting something else is going on—especially since Satoru comes out of his mouth like word vomit in conversations—but that’s not his problem to deal with right now.

“You’re risking so much just to be with me,” he mumbles into his skin. “I’m not worth the trouble.”

“Hey,” Gojo murmurs, pressing a chaste kiss to Geto’s temple. “Don’t say things like that. I told you—we’ll figure this shit out like we always do, right? I’m sorry I couldn’t be around when it really mattered.”

“It always matters that you’re here,” Geto insists, “But it doesn’t mean you should risk everything you work toward for my sake. Besides, I don’t regret what I did for the twins, or what I did to my parents. It was deserved.”

Gojo doesn’t make a comment about his parents; while he agrees with Geto’s sentiments about them being genuinely flawed people, they still loved him. The comment just doesn’t sit right with him. Everyone is capable of doing terrible things—even Gojo hasn’t been against slaughtering mass numbers of non-sorcerers after what’s happened with Riko—but this? This is something he can’t wholly fathom from Geto, least of all from Geto.

But it’s not like Gojo can make any claims—most of it is kind of baseless given he has a distant relationship with his own folks.

Even so…

“Whoever said I gave a damn about what the higher-ups think? Except for maybe Yaga,” he quips as he drags out a sigh. “The higher-ups are a bunch of conservative fools. I’m a sensei now just to spite them.”

“I genuinely fear for your students,” Geto deadpans. Gojo scoffs, casting a sidelong glance at the curse user.

“Hey! Am I that bad?” he laments, pouting like a sad puppy.

“…Do you really want me to answer that?” Geto drawls with a little smirk playing on his lips. Gojo’s resolve crumbles in that moment and he’s still pouting like a petulant child.

“You’re no fun,” he gripes and Geto chuckles at that. He doesn’t want to, but he knows he has to return to his own duties. The girls are going to get a little restless not knowing where he is and the last thing he needs to cause is unnecessary conflict.

He shifts a bit in his spot, and Gojo whines, snuggling into him closer to keep him in place.

“I should probably get ready to leave,” he announces as he moves to untangle himself from Gojo’s body, but Gojo protests out loud with another pitiful whine, yanks him back into bed, his lips barely brushing over his. Geto can’t even complain; he won’t deny Gojo has him wrapped around his finger even now.

“Stay a while longer,” he murmurs, and their lips finally lock. This time, it’s Geto melting into Gojo and allowing himself to be vulnerable for a while longer. He doesn’t get to have moments like these to himself as much anymore. There’s no room for it given his position that he put on himself willingly. He means what he told Gojo—he doesn’t regret his decisions. He doesn’t regret breaking away from jujutsu society and their outdated ways of life. Maybe the only thing he regrets is not telling Satoru the truth sooner.

But perhaps, Satoru knowing that even now, Geto bends to his will, must be enough reassurance for him.

Later that evening, Geto finds a moment to find Satoru back at his penthouse. His students have been sent away on one of his missions—his idea of tough love, he tells him in jest—but that also gives Satoru more of an excuse not only to spend time with Geto, but to observe you on the sidelines.

Currently, you’re probably back at the bakery between your class schedule. Gojo has commented that he sees you working on your assignments on your shifts, admiring how much of a hard worker you appear to be. That’s ought to pique Geto’s interest as well—it’s important for his future doting wife to be dutiful as well, after all.

Upon entering the living space, Gojo’s once again sprawled onto the love seat, fiddling with a piece of unfamiliar cloth in his hand. Geto’s eyes widen, violet eyes sparkling in curiosity as he approaches his lover, looming over him.

Does that pair of panties…belong to you? It looks like a thong…

“How did you get this?” Geto asks, eyeing the pair of panties in Gojo’s hand. “Is it hers?”

“Indeed it is, and how else?” Gojo scoffs at the redundant questions. How unlike Geto to seem so slow to figure shit out. “I dug through her stuff while she was in class.”

As realization dawns on him, he growls like a crackle of lightning and leans in further to closely inspect the cloth.

“Give that to me,” Geto growls, attempting to snatch it from his hand but Gojo’s eyes twinkle as he keeps it just out of reach, shifting over to the further edge of the couch.

“Wait your turn, baby,” he purrs as he brings the lacy red cotton thong to his nose, inhaling your fresh scent. “Fuck. I bet she tastes as good as she smells.”

“Satoru,” he addresses in a firmer tone as Geto’s lips curl into a pout. “Give me.”

Gojo smirks as he slips his free hand into his slacks, brushing a calloused thumb over his tip. He shivers. He’s already leaking and hard, but he can make himself last as long as needed. Plenty of practice on his own and with Geto.

“Satoru…” Geto tries again, crawling onto the couch toward him and wrapping his arms around his waist, scooting closer. “You’re torturing me.”

“Wait your turn, but if you need it that badly, you can just join me.” His gaze flickers down at Geto’s lap, then meets his eyes, a devious little glint in his sharp sky blue eyes.

A whimper leaves Gojo’s lips as he’s already so oversensitive.

Geto runs his tongue past his lips as he observes the scene unfold. Gojo keeps the underwear hovering over his nose, debauched by your scent, his face flushed with a coat sweat leaving behind a light sheen on his fair complexion. Geto finds himself scowling to himself—has Gojo really lost his patience so soon? He has yet to secure you and yet here he is, swindling things from your apartment just because he doesn’t know how to wait.

The best things come to those who do, after all; as old and cliché as that adage is, Geto finds it to be truer the older he gets.

Groaning in defeat (as much as he loathes to admit it), Geto slips his hand into his pants and begins to lightly stroke his cock, eyes fixed on the cloth shoved into Gojo’s face.

“Why are you taking so long with her?” Gojo moans into the fabric. “She smells so good. So sweet.”

“We can’t afford to be impulsive, Satoru,” he mutters, picking up his pace as he rests his forehead onto Gojo’s shoulder.

“I know, but come fucking on…you need her more badly than I do. This is about you, ultimately, you know. There’ll be a time where…fuck…I can’t be here at all. And you need someone. I also have to…fuck…take care of Fushiguro’s kid.”

“I know,” Geto mumbles, now practically fisting his cock so hard there’s a splorch, splorch, splorch—with each firm stroke as he nears his release. It won’t nearly be as satisfying once he finally has you where he wants you, though. Satoru agrees with that sentiment; Geto can tell.

“Fuck, Suguru. You’re down bad for a monkey,” he teases as his eyes remain fixed on his leaking girth. “Maybe your convictions aren’t that solid at all, Suguru.”

“Shut up,” he snaps in a low hiss, biting onto his shoulder and making Gojo yelp from the contact.

They climax together, their breaths mixing as they pant to catch their breath.

“You’re so down bad,” Gojo chortles, leaning in to peck his lips. “But so am I.”

Geto finally snatches the panties from Gojo’s clutches. Gojo’s lips twitch into a smirk.

Your only classes today have been canceled, so you take a full shift at the bakery. It’s not like there are many other employees anyway, and you can use the extra cash. Nothing wrong with adding a few extra hours, right? Just means you’re prioritizing the right things in your life, unlike last night while you were sobbing into the shower about your lack of a love life…

…And as if to rub salt into the wound, your eyes flit to a couple sitting at one of the bars by the window near the entrance. Sharing scones. Sneaking kisses. Taking couple selfies. Popping cherries into each other’s mouths. It makes you sigh in longing as you sink your face into a clenched fist. You so wish you can have something like that. Something pure, happy, carefree. Something to keep you working toward something if it means spending the rest of your life with someone you love. It makes things like this a little more worthwhile, because you have someone to go home to.

Instead, all you have waiting at home is a whole lot of nothing.

“Excuse me!” a customer ushers with a bright smile, waving his hand in front of your face. You snap out of your thoughts and smile apologetically back. “Hey, sorry. I didn’t want to bug you, but I was waiting to order for a bit now.”

“Oh! I’m so sorry about that,” you reply as you zip back over to the cash register. “What can I get ready for you?”

“Hey, aren’t you in Evolutionary Computing with me?”

“Oh, are you a graduate student?” you ask with your curiosity clearly piqued. Now that you examine his face, you do kind of recognize him…this might be a chance to really make some connections this year! Your heart is leaping with joy at the idea; does this mean you might even find someone if you actually actively try?

He shakes his head, still wearing a bright smile that makes your heart rush. This guy seems to be bouncing off the walls with sunshine. Maybe he has that golden retriever energy people explain so much about on social media, and that’s just your type!

“PhD,” he corrects while scratching the back of his head. “But I’m taking that class this term. Man, it’s no joke, huh?”

You burst into a fit of giggles at that notion. That class has kept you up for many nights slaving over debugging endless lines of code. “No kidding! Those projects sure are hefty. Did you keep running into bugs in that last workshop she assigned us?”

“Oh, yeah. It’s annoying, for sure. I’m still debugging that code! Maybe we can help each other out a bit, yeah?” he offers as he pulls out his phone. “We have a chat for the class if you want to join that too.”

“I’d love that, thank you!” You realize something you nearly forgot. “Oh right, your order?”

“Oh, yeah! Um…” he trails off, scanning the menu above you. “I could go for a Nutella crepe and some black coffee.”

“Awesome, I’ll have that right out for y—!” Your voice peters out as you hear the ding of the bell on the door, another customer strolling inside.

You heart threatens to stop then and there.

It’s Geto.

And he’s alone, this time. Your classmate must have caught onto your unease, and you try to shake yourself out of it. Just bounce back like you always do! You have a job! And you’re working hard as a student, even trying to make friends here! And you’re doing just fine!

You clear your throat, bouncing back to your customer service tone, ignoring the way your voice wavers ever so slightly. “Yeah, I’ll get that right out for you! And we can talk about class stuff later.”

The stranger nods with a handsome smile. “Yeah! I’m Masato Fujimoto, by the way!”

“Nice to meet you!” you exclaim. You tell him your name.

You ignore the icky, prickly feelings over your skin as Geto approaches the counter, glaring into Fujimoto’s back.

As Fujimoto shuffles over to settle into one of the bar stools, you keep on a plastered smile as Geto approaches the counter.

“Hello again,” you greet with another practiced smile. You try not to pay attention, but his eyes are still following Fujimoto…why’s that? Does he recognize him or something? “Are you picking up some things for your twins?”

“Not quite,” he answers, as his piercing violet gaze fixes on you. You cock your head to the side, eyebrows scrunching as you’re bombarded with a myriad of swirling thoughts. He seems more standoffish than usual today…What’s with him? Is there still trouble in paradise, or is he just a tired father?

“Oh?” And for fuck’s sake, why do you care? He’s just a customer, remember?

“I’m just here to propose an offer,” he begins, his tone authoritative, much like a father’s. “But before that, I suppose I should order something for the girls.”

“How can those two eat so much Nutella and not get sick?” You find yourself giggling into your hand, as if in an effort to put an ease to that tension weighing ok your heart.

“I haven’t the slightest idea,” he admits, seeming to humor your attempt at small talk, perhaps also in an effort to help you lower your guard around him. You appreciate the effort he’s making this time around.

As he pulls out his wallet, you rest your hand over his to stop him as he hands over his card.

“It’s on me,” you tell him with a tight-lipped smile. If it’s just stuff at home weighing him down, that might lift a bit of tension off of his shoulders…right?

He’s frozen in his spot again, and he actually blinks a few times at that—that’s probably the most reactive you’ve ever seen him with you; you aren’t sure what to make of it—but without another word, he returns his wallet to his back pocket. As he does, another customer strolls in and turns to the counter upon recognizing Geto.

You recognize this customer, too. He’s come here a handful of times, and has honestly spent more money here than any other customer that you have ever had drop by literally ever. You wonder if that guy is really made of money if he can just waste it all like that on something as trivial as sweets.

“Suguru,” the tall man with shock white hair greets him in a lazy drawl as he ambles over to him, wrapping a long arm around his shoulders. He cast a glance at you, his lips twitching into a small smirk. “Good morning, Princess.”

“Hi, Gojo, it’s been a while,” you reply, as your gaze flits from him to Geto, and back to him. “You two are friends?”

Gojo nods, as his sunglasses catch the ceiling lights, that unsettling and somehow misplaced smirk widening the longer he stares at you. “Yep. Something like that.”

“Go wait at a table or something, Satoru,” Geto commands smoothly as Gojo visibly deflates from the notion. If you don’t know any better, he might be thinking he’s missing out on something fun. Nothing’s fun about these jobs.

Satoru? …He’s that Satoru? It’s not like he introduced himself to me with his first name anyways…

Gojo doesn’t leave just yet, hanging around Geto for just a bit longer—just to observe what plays out, maybe?

“Sorry about him. He can be a bit…” Geto trails off, eyes rolling upward as if seeking the right word. “Overzealous.”

“No worries,” you respond as you type in the rest of his typical order for the twins. “I’ll get your order right away for you. Does your friend Gojo want to order something?”

“Satoru?” Geto addresses. Gojo drags out a sigh as he scans the menu above you.

“What’s the sweetest thing you got on the menu?” He lowers his sunglasses—why does he wear those inside? And are those Cartier?—revealing a pair of stunning sky blue eyes boring into yours. “Besides you, of course.”

Your cheeks heat up, caught off guard by the comment before you splutter from nervous laughter as Geto whacks his head.

“Ow! Hey!” Gojo shouts, rubbing the sore area while scowling. “What the hell, Suguru?”

“I told you to go wait at a table, you twit,” Geto chastises as a frown stresses his features. “I’ll deal with you later.”

Gojo makes a sound.

“Did you just call me a twit?” Gojo shoots back with a little pout of his glossed lips.

“Yes, because that’s what you are,” Geto jeers, not daring to look at his face because he knows he’ll cave in that very moment. “Now for goodness sake, Satoru. Do as I tell you.”

Gojo is still pouting as he makes a face at Geto.

“You’ve been fathering so hard that it’s spilling into this relationship,” Gojo quips before he twists around on his heel and saunters off. You’re stunned into silence at the exchange. So they are lovers or just close friends? That’s difficult to discern, and you don’t really care to dig much deeper in that moment. The dynamic is strange, but you have come to find that everything about Suguru Geto—you know his first name now, at least—is downright strange.

A tense silence hangs over the two of you. You fiddle with your frilly sage green apron as something coils in your stomach. An instincts urges you to flee for some reason, but you doubt you can get very far… and you don’t know what you’re fleeing from just yet but you have a fair idea.

After Gojo steps outside and settles at an outdoor table, Geto leans in with his own small smirk playing on his features. Your stomach tightens even further as your mouth presses into a thin line.

“Would you be interested in a little trick, little dove?” he inquires in a soft tone, catching you off-guard.

“Hm?” You cock your head. Is this one of those weird corny pickup lines and you just can’t understand it at all or something? And what the hell? ‘Little dove’? What are you, a pet?

Because that’s not endearing or sexy at all…

But maybe that’s not the goal for him.

“You come with us,” he goes on, “Or I kill everyone in this building.”

Your heart finally stops—a retort dying on your tongue…did you hear him correctly? Is he being for real? And does that mean Gojo is an accomplice of his, or something?

Your eyes flit to different corners of the building before landing back on Geto, whose eyes darken with malice.

“E-excuse me?” you cough, blinking rapidly as you’re taken aback.

“Oh, you silly, little dove,” he coos in a mocking way, that smirk still on his lips, showing bits of his teeth. “I forget how absurdly simple and stupid humans are.” He points somewhere behind you, to the kitchen, where three of the chefs are working diligently on the orders for this morning’s customers. You’re terrified to go along with this, but something inside of you is telling you not to challenge this man, not to enrage him.

“If you don’t believe me, then just observe,” he commands, as he continues pointing in that direction.

You swallow on a dry lump of nothing as you twist around to follow his finger. You don’t know what to expect.

“Which one first, would you say?” he asks, tone laden in something dark and sinister. You ignore the way your fingers twitch and how your knees already threaten to buckle. You cling onto the edge of the counter for dear life, as if that can save you now. “I don’t like how the chef in the middle gets too friendly with you between shifts, so we can start with him, hm?”

In the blink of an eye, you can’t rip your gaze away as the chef’s sleeve is caught on fire before the rest of his body is engulfed in flames. You’re quivering in your spot as the stench of charred flesh wafts through the air and your eyes meet the remains of his body, now completely burnt to ash. The other two chefs meet the same fate before they can scream or call for help.

Your hands fly over your mouth as you’re utterly helpless—you can’t save anyone here, either. Not when you’re face to face with a force you can’t even perceive or comprehend. Geto’s sickening cackle makes your blood burble beneath your skin, but you don’t know what you can do in a situation like this.

“Wh-why are you—?” You twist around to face him to meet him now with wild violet eyes and a smile that’s lusting for more action—whether shedding some blood or otherwise. You don’t know if he wants to spill your blood too.

And you don’t want to test the theory.

You still have half a mind to run, to make a break for it, just bolt out the entrance or somewhere in the back, but you’re no fool. You won’t get very far.

He now jabs his thumb to another direction. And you fear for the worst as you follow it to find the dismembered, mangled body of your classmate, his blood splattered all over the counter and tiled floor. The stench of decay and blood strengthens.

All the color from your skin fades. You gawk at him, fear evident in the way your eyes shimmer with tears. You don’t even hear the screams and shrieks because everyone has died at the snap of Geto’s fingers, practically.

What…what’s happening? Why is this happening? Why is he doing this? What have you done? Your head’s spinning from everything happening and you can’t even find a moment to truly grapple with it all.

“Now,” he continues in that same sharp, authoritative tone. “Come with us or every customer who waltzes inside dies on sight.”

Your lips quiver as you reluctantly nod. You don’t think to avert your gaze to know every other customer here, like that couple, are now dead by his hands.

“My little dove,” Geto purrs as you feel the presence of someone waltzing up from behind you. Someone is breathing down hard on the nape of your neck, and you’re caught—unable to flee, unable to do anything. You’re too weak to do anything, to try to do anything at all.

“Hey again, Princess,” Gojo drawls into your ear, his fingers lightly brushing down your arms until he grasps either of your wrists.

Before you know it, you lose consciousness from the sheer shock of it all.

 You hear faint voiced when you find yourself waking up.

“Damn, look at this thong! Who knew she was a little slut all along?” you recognize Gojo’s voice. “She’s not as innocent as she looks, eh? Bet she can’t go to bed without wringing a few orgasms out of herself with a toy or something. Princess must be lonely, hm?”

“You’re so crude, Satoru,” comes the exasperated response from Geto. The way they talk about you like you’re just some objectified toy… you’re pissed off about that, no doubt about it ,but can you really do anything in a situation like this? What even are they? How can they do the things they just did out there? All of the questions spiraling in your mind and yet you doubt they’ll give you any straight answers.

It's probably not even all that relevant anymore. You’re going to be flunking out of grad school due to absences and there’s going to be no way for you to redeem that.

Have they even thought about that? That you have a life you want? You have nothing outside of what you worked for, and now they’re just going to take all of that away just because they know they can get away with it?

“Fuuuuuck,” you hear a deep inhale from Gojo again. “She smells so good. Wonder if she uses those feminine washes. She smells so sweet. Like chocolate and strawberry.”

Geto bites back another groan.

“Satoru, shut up,” he chides, and you can practically feel Gojo clamping his mouth shut at his command like an obedient dog. “She’s waking up.”

Reluctantly, you do, your vision coming into full focus, and you’re met with the eager faces of the duo who brought you here…wherever here is. It’s a darker area, much akin to the dungeons you’d see in extravagant castles. It’s likely underground somewhere. It’s likely they’ve planned this for along time.

And it’s likely you’re going to die here…

“There she is! Hey, Princess,” Gojo grins as he twirls your lacy baby pink thong between his fingers.

He brings it to his nose again, inhaling your lingering scent sharply. “What do you use? You smell amazing. And look! There’s even a little wet spot just for me.”

He flicks his tongue against the stain and groans at your natural taste, making you gawk, appalled. What kind of freaks are these guys?

Do you really want to find out?

“Damn, Suguru,” he growls, kissing into the wet spot, making you wince from embarrassment. “You chose someone good.”

“Patience, Satoru,” he reprimands him as he rests a firm hand on his shoulder before staring down at you in your pitiful form, tutting a little.

“You must be so frightened. Don’t worry, little dove. We’ll get you comfortable soon enough. But first, we just need to…” Geto trails off as he and Gojo share a knowing glance. “…inspect a few things.”

You try to flinch away as his hand reaches out to you, but find you’re chained to the wall behind you. They rattle with each time you struggle. It’s only then you see your ankles are curled behind your head and secured with cuffs. There’s not much movement you can afford, even. You have to admit these guys really thought shit through.

What a humiliating position to find yourself in, indeed.

Geto crouches down and gets an eyeful of your cunt, already glistening with your slick. He whistles, impressed as two fingers pry your folds apart, making your sensitive skin hit the chilly air of wherever you are…it looks like a chamber…? Stone walls and underground…?

A dungeon, maybe, just like you said before. That’s the best way to put it, you figure. You’re their little damsel trapped in their dungeon.

“Please, it hurts!” you whimper, too scared to glance down to look.

“We haven’t even done anything yet, little dove,” Geto coos as his slender, bony middle finger makes soothing patterns over your clit. You bite back a hiss from the contact. “Besides, it’s not like we want to hurt you.”

“Quite the opposite,” Gojo coos as he grabs your chin and digs his fingers into your cheeks, forcing you to gaze up at him. He grazes his lips over yours. “We want to have a little fun. But let’s take care of a few things first, like Suguru said, okay? We want to know what we’re dealing with here, so answer us this: is this a virgin pussy here? We can make things work regardless, but it’s still important to us.”

Your eyes widen at the vulgarity of the question, but you haven’t a choice on the matter. You know how these things work; you’re no fool. You have to comply unless you want to be dealt a worse hand. You decide you’d rather take any humiliating thing they’d throw at you instead of something worse, like what they made you watch unfold back at the bakery… that’s another part of your life down the drain.

“Um…kind of yes, kind of no? I’m not sure what…um, counts. I never had anything…inside?” You feel the embarrassment seeping into your bones like acid. “Like, a real thing…like no dicks inside…just um…I use toys…on myself…”

God, the resounding embarrassment from admitting this to them is ridiculous.

You await judgment, mocking laughter...anything.

Instead, the two share another long glance as they process that information, before turning back to you.

“Fuck,” Gojo growls, his tongue poking out between his lips. “This is going to be fun.”

Gojo looms over you, hands trailing up your exposed stomach and stopping at your exposed breasts.

“Wow, look at those!" He’s singing you praises yet it’s in such a sickening, objectifying way…it’s so maddening. He squeezes both of your tits so hard they leave behind an impression. “Gosh, they feel like balloons!”

“Satoru,” Geto scolds, “Don’t be too rough on her so soon.”

Gojo bites back a groan, but heeds Geto’s warning regardless, opting to trail kisses up your sternum before stopping at the pulse point on your throat, where he suckles a bit on the skin. You can’t move, you can’t even fight back in a helpless position like this; all you can manage is a pathetic little whine leaving your lips in protest.

“Please, please don’t…” you beg through a broken sob.

“Don’t what, Princess? I’m not doing anything wrong,” he taunts as he latches his lips onto your neck, nipping a bit on the sensitive skin there and making you gasp.

Thankfully, this doesn't last for long.

“I’m afraid I have to run, Princess. Duty calls,” Gojo announces as he finishes peppering slobbery kisses all over your neck and collarbone. “I’ll be back for more, though. Don’t worry your pretty head.”

“Satoru,” Geto purrs, “Don’t have us wait long. And be careful out there.”

Gojo nods before he exits the dungeon, foot falls fading as he disappears up the flight of stairs in a far corner.

Geto hums as he spits into your pussy, making you thrash about in the chains. He tuts at that, eyes rolling upward to glare.

“None of that, little dove,” he growls as his lips hover over your soaking cunt. “Be still for me. It’ll make things easier if you don’t struggle.”

He licks a long line up your folds, groaning at your taste—as if he’s yearned for this longer than you’re even aware of yourself. A low whimper escapes your lips, and he drags out an irritated sigh. You already cause a minor annoyance, and he likely doesn’t want to hear any more protests out of you.

“Though it’s unnecessary,” he purrs as he balls up the thong Gojo returns to him before stuffing it into your mouth. “I just can’t help myself when you look so good like this.”

He closes his lips over your leaking, oversensitive pussy, his tongue rolling along your folds and twisting around your clit. You wish you can move, you wish you can scream, but they’re all muffled through the gag. You know better than to spit it out—it’s only going to anger him and the last thing you want is something worse than this. If this can even get any worse, which it certainly can.

His tongue rolls along your clit a few times, eliciting more reluctant moans out of you. You have wished it was a real tongue on your pussy instead of your clit sucker or something, but definitely not like this. You know they say be careful what you wish for, but when you wished for some action in your life, you absolutely did not mean in this form with two psychopaths absolutely obsessed with you.

Though, you have a feeling that Geto is the true mastermind behind all of this. It doesn’t even seem like Gojo is directly involving himself at all; he’s just going along with whatever Geto wants. Much like an obedient dog.

His mouth doesn’t leave your pussy and his violet gaze remains focused on yours. Geto’s more akin to a rabid animal than a person in this state, just feasting off of any scrapes he can and in this case those scrapes are your pussy. What a disgusting way to put it, but what other way can you? Nothing about this is arousing in the slightest!

His hands fly up to your breasts, his fingers and thumbs flicking and twisting the nubs of either one and you wail through the gag. He only chuckles in response, slipping one of your nipples into his mouth. He suckles hard, needily, his tongue twirling around the nub before biting down on it. He delivers the same treatment to the other nipple before repeating the process over and over. He leaves behind a number of hickeys and bruises, and this is far from over as he pulls back to observe his handiwork.

He even whips out his smart phone, snapping a few photos of you in such a humiliating, disheveled state, muttering something under his breath about showing them to Gojo later.

He slips it back into his pocket as he takes in another long eyeful of you, completely at his mercy. Your whole body shudders from his cold gaze. It’s only the beginning of such a humiliating way to go, but what else does he have in store for you?

“Since it looks like we have to ease you into this, to take us both,” Geto purrs as he lines his cock to your slick, gooey front entrance. All perfect for him to slide his entire length and girth easily, but he wants to be merciful to you—kind, even, and it makes bile threaten to spill out of your mouth at the mere prospect. “I won’t go further than the head for now.”

As he says so, the tip catches in your hole and a breathy gasp escapes your lips. Oh my god, does it sting, but he doesn’t care now, does he? He coos, inching the rest of the head inside and settling it in there, gasping as your spongy walls already try to clench around him.

“Oh, someone’s been dying for some action, hm? Don’t worry, little dove. I plan to give you everything and more. You’ll be wanting for nothing,” he vows as he shudders while bucking his hips once, testing your reactions.

It stings a little, but you have stuck dildos and vibrator wands up yourself. You just don’t expect his size, and you have a feeling Gojo isn’t much different in that aspect.

“Does it feel good to get some real cock in there for once?” he taunts in a low, mocking purr. “Especially, considering I’m quite large compared to most. That must thrill you, hm?”

You can’t believe he expects you to answer that. Your protests and whines are muffled through your panties.

Not from you, you think, sneering in your mind, but you don’t dare utter out loud.

You don’t give him the satisfaction of answering out loud, glowering at him as you grit your teeth. You’re at a loss of what more you can do. What else can you do?

He keeps a gentle rhythm, but doesn’t let you adjust. Not that you really need to, it’s just the tip, he swears, but just the head feels so fucking big.

He pulls out before he comes, so he’s at the least merciful.

“You feel perfect,” he groans ins reverent tone. “I can only expect this to feel just as good when I’m inside.”

His finger rims the ring of muscle just below.

“No…” you whimper more audibly through the gag before you can hold your tongue.

“No?” he coos through a disapproving scowl. “My little dove, you don’t have a choice. What we’ve done is only a taste of what we’re capable of doing if you disobey; do you really wish to find out how much damage we can create together?”

Your fearful eyes meet his—cold. Manic. Deranged.

“I can assure you, my love,” he drawls, thrusting the tip of himself once more. “It’s world shattering.”

You don’t dare challenge that statement; he’s not bluffing, and you know it. If he can do what he did at the bakery, what else can he do? And can he do that at a grander scale than what you already saw?

You fear the answer. You don’t entertain the thoughts further as Geto toys with you.

In what feels like hours, the humiliation stops.

After Geto has his way with you, he releases you from the chains and helps you to your feet. He brings his hands to cup your face, brushing his thumbs along your skin.

“While you are going to be arranged to remain with me, Satoru will be making plenty of visits,” he explains, pulling you into his chest in a protective hold as he guides you out of the underground dungeon. The stairs lead to his temple, apparently. He’s some fake priest or something. You figure he’s going to lead you to the restroom to help you wash up.

And you’re right. The first door you find leads to one and he ushers you inside, following after you and shutting the door behind him. You still are at a loss of how your life changed in a matter of seconds. You should not have taken your freedom for granted, and now you’re in the hands of this…whatever this man is.

Goosebumps rise on your skin as he approaches you from behind, rubbing your elbows in an attempt to soothe your overactive nerves. As if he wants to truly make you feel at home here, which somehow feels progressively more cruel…

“I’m very pleased to have you here,” he murmurs into your neck as he moves to start the shower, waiting for the water to preheat. “The girls will also be happy to know we secured you successfully.”

Secured? you think in disgust, glaring daggers at the audacity of this…this…fucker! This absolute piece of shit, dirtbag, scumbag! Who the hell does he think he is?! Doesn’t he mean kidnapped?

You don’t say a word as helps you into the shower, taking the time to clean off all of the dirt and grime while stealing a few kisses from you in the process. You don’t even think about protesting, not only knowing what he can do, but also not knowing the full extent of what he can do. Once he’s done, he allows you to perch onto the edge of the bathtub attached to the shower as he gathers a few items for you. He's trying to be hospitable, as if that’s going to fix the damage he’s done.

Un-fucking-believable. You don’t even know what you’re dealing with here, either, and he has yet to give you a real reason why you’re here.

“Now come,” Geto says as he helps you into a robe. “You have a new family waiting for you, my little dove. The girls are waiting to see you.”

“Do they know about this?” you mumble, halting in place. A part of you wants to believe those girls are innocent in all of this, but oh, how wrong you are going to be around it. “This side to you?”

He quirks an eyebrow at that. “I hide nothing from my girls. In fact, they’re the ones who insisted on you staying with us, you know. It’s them you should be thanking. They decided they want you, and that’s what I did.”

You feel your heart drop at that newfound information. What’s that people say these days? Don’t ever think you know a person’s heart. They’re always going to surprise you. Even with two girls as innocent and vulnerable as Nanako and Mimiko seem…apparently, they arrange this lifestyle for you.

“I see,” you mutter, but you don’t want to admit defeat just yet.

Geto tilts your head to meet his eyes, thumb brushing along your cheek. If you don’t know any better, you could dare call the look in his eyes something akin to affection. But you know you’re nothing more than a pet to him.

“Don’t fret, little dove. You’ll see that you belong with our little family in no time at all.”

[anti-katsuki-lounge]

Character Flaws vs Writing Flaws:

While catching up on some of the stuff people have commented/sent to me, I noticed someone mention how Katsuki being a bully is a flaw of his and that not every character needs to be a good person.

First of all, when did I ever say that a character has to be morally correct to be a good character? Some of my favorite characters are villains who’ve done worse things than Katsuki.

So what’s the difference between them and Katsuki?

Well, the villains have a reason for existing. Joker is meant to serve as a parallel to Batman, challenging his morals while also showing what an unhinged Batman could look like.

On a much lesser scale, despite his extremely limited screen time, Moonfish’s bloodlust, lack of sanity, and cannibalism serve two purposes in MHA: to showcase Fumikage’s power and to give the readers an example of what the heroes of this world have to deal with.

Katsuki’s flaws are meant to show the flaws of a world that values raw power over morals, but he fails at this. The reason why? His flaws are never allowed to be flaws.

Katsuki’s aggressive and hostile nature should have him struggling to make friends, yet he has the two pillars of 1-A, that being Ejiro and Denkias described by Hori, immediately befriend him with no issues. His inability to empathize with others should have people wanting to steer away from him, but his instead 1-A loves him, Eri loves him despite being the last person who would, and anyone who doesn’t love him is seen as being in the wrong.

Katsuki is meant to be a big fish in a little pond, someone whose ego isn’t challenged until a certain point, and the Battle Trials were meant to show this. While yes, Katsuki has a mini-breakdown over the fact that he’s no longer in a class of people with weaker quirks, he has no issue claiming a spot as a Top Dog and he still continues to demean the people around him.

Katsuki’s aggressiveness is meant to be both a flaw and an asset. His aggressive nature is what motivates him to defeat the villain, but it’s supposed to cause him to have a one track mind when it comes to hero work. Rescue, teamwork, all of that is ignored by him to fight the big bad. His ego caused everyone to have a tougher time during the USJ, but is that ever touched upon? Nope. It’s just ignored. When Katsuki saved Kyouka, there was no buildup to it. It just happens. We never see him struggle with teamwork because everyone else follows him like a lost puppy.

Meanwhile, Izuku is meant to be Katsuki’s parallel in this department. He’s meant to showcase why too much selflessness isn’t good while also showing that a hero is more than just their raw power. Problem is, Izuku gets completely shat on no matter what he does. He goes after a villain to protect U.A? Gets criticized. Does his best to work with Katsuki? Gets blamed despite it solely being an issue on Katsuki’s end. Does everything perfectly? Nope, still not enough. Compared to Izuku, who always seems to be in the wrong, Katsuki’s placed as this paragon of heroic virtues despite the fact both characters are supposed to be two halves of a whole. They’re supposed to learn from one another. Problem is, Katsuki’s flaws are always ignored while Izuku’s positive traits are demeaned.

Finally, Katsuki being a bully is supposed to serve as a starting point for his character. He’s meant to grow and develop as a human being. Again, he doesn’t, or at least he doesn’t do so in an organic way. He never suffers consequences for his behavior, he’s constantly propped up and coddled instead of criticized, and he’s given some heroic moments despite there being no buildup to them. In the span of a month he goes from nearly killing Izuku to risking his life for him. Where the hell did that come from? Honestly, I wouldn’t care if Katsuki being a bully is his sole purpose for existing, but he’s meant to be more than that. This is supposed to be a well developed and fully fleshed out character who grows from his selfishness and is meant to show that anyone can be a hero, no matter their starting point. But when the development is crap and he hardly changes outside of some OOC moments, then his flaws cease to be flaws that he’s meant to overcome. Instead MHA treats it as him being quirky and misunderstood.

In conclusion, you just can’t present something as a character flaw and expect it to serve as an excuse as to why a character exhibits said flaw. You have to think of the following: what purpose does this flaw serve? Is it meant to be used to teach a lesson? Does it set something in motion, whether it be the development of this character, another character, or does the flaw cause the character’s downfall? The only thing Katsuki’s flaws does right is that they set up Izuku’s story, which again would be fine if that’s Katsuki’s purpose, but it’s not. Him being a bully isn’t something that he overcomes in a natural way. His redemption story is the equivalent of filling things out of a checklist without being fleshed out. Every time he screws up, it’s never treated as a screw-up. Oh he failed the hero license exam? Well so did Shoto so he’s not unique there, and the proctors still suck his dick even while he’s “failing”. Him being the reason for 13’s injuries? Never brought up.

Katsuki’s flaws don’t piss me off because they are flaws, but because the writing of his character IS so deeply flawed despite being a centralized character in the story.

Oh, and as always, someone can dislike a character for whatever reason they might have. If people don’t like Katsuki because he’s a bully, then they have every right to. What I wrote is a response as to why I think Katsuki’s a shit character and how it’s not because of his flaws themselves, but how Hori goes about writing these flaws.

[briebysabs]

Lu Guang is a hypocrite and that’s okay (great even)

I must stand ten toes for this man because I’m noticing the slander that went on in September and I cannot allow it. I know I’m six months late but just bear with me. We are introduced to Lu Guang as a rational, stoic, sort of wise protagonist. The brains of the operation if you will (although Cheng is clever in his own right but that’s a whole other discussion). Qiao Ling and Captain Xiao describe him as more mature. Shiguang’s relationship is strong but it’s structured, especially for their work, to where Cheng has to depend on Lu Guang. Should only do as he says and not do anything impulsive.

And it gets to a point where Cheng doesn’t know what to do without him and when LG isn’t there he relies on his past words to guide him. The thing is, we’ve seen that CXS can come up with great plans and make good decisions without Lu Guang’s voice in his head. Like how he caught Min Liu or planning how save Lu Guang from Li Tianchen. But the story has built LG up so much to be a reliable character so it can’t be untrue. But then the s2 finale happens, Cheng gets shot and Lu Guang loses his mind.

And then the ending basically tells you that he’s been winging it and gambling this whole time. Experimenting with god knows how many timelines, simply using his knowledge from the previous one to see if he’ll get lucky this time. Lu Guang has been playing a crane game. So in a story that is all about mistakes, guilt and regrets. Of showing the imperfections of people. Of showing the struggles of moving forward, of being satisfied with the present. Of sacrificing your sanity, your voice, your desires, and happiness for the people you love. How is this bad writing?

Link click has been tricking the audience to believe Lu Guang is an infallible character.

But Link Click was never about perfect people.

What he’s trying to do is no different from Li Tianchen, one of our antagonists. And I love CXS to fucking pieces but this show raises the question of a life’s value. LG is trying to save Cheng and so refuses to change the past for anyone else. Bc it may alter things and doom CXS in the process and ruin all he’s worked towards. But then you ask yourself, is CXS’s life worth more than the twins' mother? Is it worth more than Chen’s mother? Is it worth more than Emma?

It doesn’t matter because it is to Lu Guang. It’s like the question if your sibling and a mailman are trapped in a burning building but you can only try to save one. Unless they’re the absolute scum of the earth, chances are and possibly even despite that, you’re going to pick your sibling. That don’t mean it’s objectively more valuable than the mailman or you didn’t have sympathy for that person, they have loved ones, hopes and joys too. “Lu Guang is a hypocrite, selfish, unreliable, and a liar” yes he is. Because there is something called ‘flawed characters’. It’s okay for your protagonist to not be the best person. It’s okay to write a protagonist whose trauma has defined some of their actions.

If you’ve been forced to have someone you love die in your arms over and over, why is it surprising that you would lie to them? How is it surprising that you’d try to keep secrets? That you’d set things up to be in a position to control the situation? That’ll force you to plan better so maybe, just maybe things will be different? You think Lu Guang lacks self awareness and doesn’t know what this makes him? Of all things you can call LG, he’s not delusional. He knows the weight of his actions.

Link Click has and always will be a story about people. Where our emotions and choices take us. Lu Guang isn’t a robot so why would he be an exception?

Plus everyone should’ve been knew Lu Guang was sus anyway. Idk how that’s mischaracterization, there’s proof of him lying and keeping secrets from CXS in s1. It doesn’t ruin anything it recontextualizes what we were shown back then.

[hellyeahscarleteen]

"When some people say someone was intimate, they’re talking about sex. Sex is one way to be intimate, but sex isn’t the only way to be intimate. No one thing, including sex, feels intimate for everyone. What is and isn’t intimate to people is personal and individual.

Some ways of being intimate and building intimacy are:

Sharing our feelings, including hard or uncomfortable feelings.

Sharing our thoughts, dreams, goals or ideas.

Sharing touch, or other ways of being physically close, sexual or not. Just letting someone into our physical space is an intimacy.

Showing someone a part of ourselves we do not feel proud of or think is awesome. This could be something like a body part or a tricky part of our life history.

Letting someone into something we consider a private or sacred experience. This could be something like a hike to our own secretly discovered place or meditating or praying together. It could also be doing things in front of someone else we usually only do alone, like going to the bathroom or dancing in our underpants.

Sharing meaningful or valuable things: like a song that makes us cry, a childhood toy, a journal or our lucky socks.

Delegating or sharing responsibility, like letting someone care for a beloved pet, or doing a joint project about something you really care about.

Showing someone our fumbles, faults or flaws.

Asking for intimacy.

Working on something broken in our relationship, or talking about our conflicts, fears or doubts.

Helping someone, allowing ourselves to be helped or asking for help.

Handle with care. Don’t forget: when we are being vulnerable together we need to treat each other with extra sensitivity, kindness and care. We’re all more fragile when we’re being intimate.

Intimacy should never be forced. That isn’t intimacy, that’s abuse. When people are intimate with each other in a healthy way, everyone respects any limits and boundaries. There still needs to be room and space to focus on everyone as individuals. Everyone also gets to choose not to be intimate in any way, at any time. Healthy intimacy is consensual. There’s only sharing if, when and how everyone wants to."

From Quickies: Intimacy

[zumicho]

blueprints — two : wallpaper

one three main masterlist

cw: argument, angst (lol), religious references, flawed characters

between you and him: normalcy is nonexistent. the arguments aren’t heated enough to call for making amends, yet there’s a suffocating presence of wrong. an unwelcome thickness in the air that swallows the very life of your relationship, stabbing daggers at what once was.

‘you say it’s complicated, to make amends — well is that the way, that we’re headed then?’

there’s a different hurt to a betrayal that you know is coming.

“beige or paper-white?” keiji’s voice jerks you into the present.

you don’t recall how you ended up here, at the local wallpaper shop, rummaging through the ‘neutrals’ section, with the last person you’d expect. there’s a cryptic message in his gaze that you fail to decipher. he's waiting for you to respond.

“blue.”

a pause, followed by a resigned sigh. “can you take me seriously?”

“I am serious, keiji. I like the blue.”

“the blue displayed in the children’s section?” his brows scrunch.

“when will you stop letting everyone else’s view dictate your perspective?” you snap. “why do you care so much what they think?”

“I’m starting to think this isn’t just about wallpaper.”

you’d never guess that someone who wants to build houses for a living was scared of creating a home.

“it isn’t.” you’re crying. “it’s about how you refuse to try.” the tears are pathetic. because they won’t change anything. nothing will change how he thinks. they’re pathetic because they’re wasted on a situation that will stay the same regardless of what you say or do. “It’s about how I don’t matter enough — for you to try at all.”

the call of your name cuts the flashback short.

he’s crossing the room. three strides, till your face is buried into his shoulder, staining the royal blue sweater you bought him on his birthday. your nails dig into his forearms — an overwhelming sense of if I let go I lose you. akaashi’s holding on just as tight.

“I’m not ready for a house, love.”

“don’t call me that.”

“I’m trying to make this easier. on the both of us.” only the falter in his tone allows you to notice the fatigue weighing down on his shoulders, evident in the dark circles under his eyes. you don’t pity him. you should, but the anger outweighs it.

“easier on the both of us, or on you?”

“would you believe me if I said you do matter? that I’m ready to try?”

you take his words and squeeze them into an IV bag, letting it flow through your bloodstream, letting them marinate and seep deep into your brain.

his patience was slipping. “I don’t know what you want me to say. you want me to understand you, but you refuse to step into my shoes. have you considered that I’m scared?” akaashi stumbles over the last word. “talking to you is walking on eggshells.”

‘it takes strength to forgive, but I don’t feel strong.’

you lost grip of yours. “don’t yell at me for walking on eggshells you placed in this relationship.” is this how Jesus felt? when he knew Judas would betray him, and loved him nevertheless?

akaashi read the question off your face.

do you want to end this?

to your relief, he shook his head.

“how do you break up with someone who has half your soul,

and all of you?”

© froyaoya all rights reserved.

a/n: ness if u see this u brought me back into my NIKI phase. lol this fic is just my new vent medium so I’m sorry if it’s incomprehensible, messy, all of the above. proofreading tmr

tags @causenessus @wyrcan @greninjafan5000 @aliensstolemyheart @nursedflowers @whosmiadotcom @cr4yolaas @jeoo-saw @httpsivy @cnnmairoll @yenonnoff @phoenix-eclipses @tobiosluvr @rory-cakes @frvppe @mollyrolls @miyamoratsumuu @hyenagoated @mitskicain

[ladyshinga]

One of the biggest reasons I loathe "AI" things like its "art" and chat bots and shit? Because humans don't understand computers and y'all start thinking they're all-knowing GODS who can DO NO WRONG

Imagine a law bot is fed lots of past cases in order to determine punishments for a prisoner. I know we're not there yet, just bear with me for an example.

Thing is, all the past human judges were RACIST, and their punishments were disproportionate - white prisoners get lighter sentences, everyone else (especially black people) get worse.

An AI isn't gonna have morals or ethics. ALL IT CAN DO... because again, it's a COMPUTER PROGRAM and not an ACTUAL Artificial Intelligence... is read back over all the example cases it's been given to come up with something similar. It sees a very "white" name? It'll give out those same judgements because that's what it's sampling from.

Humans are programming this shit, and HUMANS have biases. Computers aren't smarter than us, they aren't wiser than us, they will make some one's bias so much worse BECAUSE other humans shrug and go "well a computer said it so it must be true" - it becomes much harder to argue a point when you're arguing against an algorithm and not a person with discernment and a real thought process.

Consider the TERF woman-only app called "giggle" that determined who was "allowed" on the app based on a selfie and an AI that could "read" some one's bone structure and "tell" if they were biologically female. Guess what! All the history of "bone structure" arguments for biological sex, racist science! Amazingly, it's WHITE cis women who had the easiest time getting on this app because the AI is ONLY basing it off of a CERTAIN subset of white women to determine WHAT femininity IS. And that's the whole history of male vs female "science", it's HEAVILY filled with white-focused traits that ultimately end up punishing, say, black women whose facial traits might not look like what the AI thinks is "feminine"

Stop trusting computer programs that were made by flawed humans. Stop thinking we're in this amazing future where this is real actual AI and we can trust these programs to be logical and non-biased. It's a fantasy

[alshamswelnahr]

I’d love to share why Kimetsu no Yaiba is so dear to me but I could go on for ages so instead I'll briefly talk about what I love most about it

The Characters:

The characters are the real stars of this manga. They all have such unique, recognizable designs, and their introductions and story conclusions are really memorable. Each one is so different and interesting, both in their personalities and abilities. I love how the story really dives into their minds, flaws, and connections with others. Their story arcs perfectly tie into the bigger themes of the series. The focus on bonds, especially the emphasis on family—whether by birth or the ones we create—is particularly touching. And I love the way it shows the characters dealing with the same situations of loss and grief, highlighting their distinct qualities.

The Story’s Messages:

The story focuses on how love and the desire to support others are key to finding purpose and beauty in a cruel world. It shows the power of human will to fight against injustice and make a difference, no matter how difficult things get. The narrative also humanizes even those considered inhuman, allowing us to empathize with them, and understand the circumstances that might lead someone down a dark path. The story stresses that life’s cruelty isn’t an excuse for violence; instead, true strength comes from love, emotional openness, and connecting with others. It portrays death as both a painful loss and a continuation of existence through our impact on others. It’s all about justice and accountability without revenge, showing the effects of evil on everyone involved while still insisting on the beauty of life, even with all its challenges.

The Fights:

The fights in KnY aren’t just about physical combat—they’re deep and meaningful, involving emotional, ethical, and thematic battles. They’re set up between characters who share similar experiences, but how they handle things differently really highlights their personalities and contrasts.

The Heart/Emotions:

One of the main reasons I love this manga is the emotional depth. Whether it’s the backstories of demons and slayers, heartwarming reunions, or the gut-wrenching moments when characters give in to their worst instincts, the goodbye scenes or the emphasis on the love and bonds between characters, and what they’re willing to do for each other, it's all incredibly touching.

In Conclusion:

KnY is sincere, enjoyable, and easy to follow. It’s well-paced and knows exactly what it is without trying to be something else just for the sake of it. And of course, Ufotable’s adaptation takes all of this to the next level with their amazing production, flawless animation, and incredible music and voice acting.

[colduncrustable]

the martin antis working so hard to make waves is so funny. like, you are very much allowed to like/dislike any character you please! but making it your whole personality or acting like you’re cooler for it is a little bit silly. you are not morally or intellectually superior for hating on a fiction character.

not to mention all of the characters in tma are very nuanced and complicated, just like real people (!), and erasing all of that to serve a certain narrative is a complete disservice to the entire body of work. jon and martin’s relationship was never meant to be easy, they first and foremost worked closely together as boss/employee, and in a workplace that was actively putting them in dangerous and horrible situations. the whole point is that they’re both super fucked up but they have each other anyway. they both have flaws, they both have gone through a great deal both with and without each other, but they found love anyway. the idea that the dynamic change in s5 is due to martin just being this villain is so wild? like he’s not a doormat anymore but he also loves jon so fiercely and stands by him over and over again?

jon hated him, jon ignored him, was verbally horrible to him again and again, literally sent him on a dangerous investigation and said if anyone had to die might as well be him, jon accused him of murder, screamed at him, jon was on the run, jon died. martin was his number one defender through everything, even when honestly? he didn’t do a lot to prove he deserved it. but martin was strong in his loyalty and did his best to be a supporter anyway. he picked up extra work, he thought of him kindly when no one else did, he mourned him, and he put himself directly in the line of fire for jon. for everyone, yes, but especially for jon, he says that. because after everything, protecting jon is still his number one priority.

it’s so important to his character that he isn’t s1 martin anymore—that he learns to be a real person who has thoughts and feelings and a backbone. jon wanted that, and does it not say something that they don’t work out until martin learns to have a little bite? there’s a difference between being a real complicated traumatized human person, and just straight up being evil, or an asshole. jon had to learn how to be a lot of softer things but martin had to learn how to square his shoulders and stick out his chin. they had different arcs, and that doesn’t make either of them inherently evil or bad. it makes them real and not perfect and very multilayered, yeah.

martin didn’t handle every choice or action perfectly, he made a lot of mistakes, and he never claims to be the best person ever. but jon also fucked up, a lot. it isn’t a competition or a comparison, that’s really not how that works. but they work because of their flaws. that’s a big part of them fitting together. martin represented the humanity they were saving, with all his good and bad. jon was well beyond that, and while that doesn’t inherently compromise his character, it does mean he’s viewed in a much different light.

(meaning i think jon’s sins are seen very very different to martin’s.) (to be clear i think both deserve to be looked at critically, but hating either of them devoutly seems sort of silly.)

i’m not sure how you can listen to tma and all the ways it dissects and reflects on humanity and turn around and run blogs or make posts in the fandom about how you hate one of the main characters for being all of that.

jon never would’ve made it through without martin, even if martin wasn’t the key to everything, he was the reason to push through and not give up. martin is why jon didn’t go full monster mode, why he held onto who he was and his humanity, even with the whole ‘kill bill’ thing. martin gave him a reason to keep going, to try, to care so deeply. obviously there were other factors but jon says it himself, martin you are my reason.

if you can’t handle the fact that martin isn’t a grade a soft boy by the end of the show that’s a lot more about you than it is about him. he grew and maybe not always for the better but he could be a real person for jon instead of some kind of mirror or blank slate to be reflected on. i genuinely don’t understand how he can be misunderstood so deeply.

they’re both fucked up ! and if they are alive Somewhere Else you bet your ass they’re having long talks and going to therapy and fighting and making up and pacing the floors and figuring it all out together. it isn’t clean or easy or necessarily enjoyable all the time, but humanity isn’t either, love isn’t either. they went through unimaginable trauma, and expecting either of them to be holding it together any better than they already are is wild. context, it’s important. but let’s not turn multi-dimensional characters into flat one word answers.

it’s very human to like and dislike, love and hate based off of bias and experiences and perspective. but also opinion does not make fact. everything is relative, everything is subjective, everything everything everything. it’s an open discussion yada yada idk i’m just screaming into the wall about all the nonsense.

and beyond all of that, discourse is so useless. criticism and constructive conversations are really really important but discourse is pointless! oh you ship these people? well that inherently threatens my ship! oh you like this character that i hate? well that makes me feel invalid for hating them. like what you like, hate what you hate, have your feelings. but if you post shit on the internet you will get people who disagree, sorry, that’s how it is. partaking in little arguments over who is right or wrong when it doesn’t actually have to do with anything harmful or unhealthy makes no sense though. posting on the internet about all the hate you have in your heart when the world is already so full of it doesn’t actually do anything but add more bad to an already very large pile of bad.

things can be discussions not arguments sometimes, i promise. it’s not always tooth and nail, and let’s not forget, most of it is over things that never need to be fought over.