#and there are zero signs of this happening
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Some asks I got for these in discord, reposting my answers here:
Pierce is on the spectrum, though she does a good job of masking most of the time (until you get her talking about her special interest which is stars and astrology (fun fact she can tell your star sign just by looking at you, very useful power)).
Frieda has BPD, and she handles it by not handling it (that is, she bottles up everything related to it, The Queen must not show weakness to subordinates). Her people don’t say her name and only refer to her as “the queen” out of respect, but a large part of her believes it’s because they disapprove of her (RSD will have you making logical leaps like that, it’s a bitch).
20. Frieda is often jealous of how tight knit her peoples’ bonds with each other are; as the queen she’s often excluded from that since everyone else puts her on a pedestal (as noted previously, they refer to her by title rather than name). More specifically she’s jealous of Hunter’s ongoing thing with Siren, as she’s been yearning for his attention for years and never received it (not in the way she wants, anyway). Again, she handles this by bottling it up, as the queen cannot be distracted by such trivial emotions. Good thing glass bottles are famously sturdy, this practice will surely continue to be a sound one.
If Maya is jealous of anything, it’s her peers’ ability to be content with tedium. With a perfect memory, she’s painfully aware of how much repetition the average day has, but her fellows don’t seem to notice, or if they do, don’t seem to care. Hell, some of them appear to find comfort in the routine, the normalcy. She attempts to shake this feeling off, but like everything else in her flawless recall, she can never entirely put it away.
25. My favorite aspects of both are going to be the angsty parts because apparently I’m a sadist.
For Frieda it’s the dehumanization. The Titans made her to be a living weapon. The gods branded her as an abomination for existing. And her own people turned her into a martyr, a Messiah figure that could prop up their fragile hopes. At no point does Frieda get to be Frieda; She’s Zero, or Priority Target One, or The Queen. Max will be the first person to treat her as human in a long time, and that’s going to be a profound moment for her that I really look forward to.
For Maya it’s going to be exploring all the detriments to a flawless memory and how the human psyche wasn’t meant to handle having that sort of ability. Imagine every mistake you’ve ever made, every abuse you’ve suffered, every pain you’ve felt, as crystal clear in your mind as the moment it happened. How do you heal? How do you move on? I do so love a good “your great power is really a curse” trope.
Frieda certainly wouldn’t think she could get away with it. Tenet Two of the demititans’ code is to do no willful harm against a fellow demititan, and to her mind she isn’t above the code. Her people on the other hand would feel differently. As I said above, they’ve turned her into their Messiah; all their hopes for survival rest in her. While it would be a deeply unsettling event for many, they’d find some way to justify it if only to keep her at the forefront, to keep her trying to save them.
4. Frieda’s innate instinct when scared is to freeze, followed by flee. Years of training have embedded a fight response in her, but part of her still feels the urge to run and hide when shit gets scary.
9. “Most gods throw dice, but Fate plays chess, and you don't find out til too late that he's been playing with two queens all along.” -Terry Pratchett
19. Rage makes Frieda’s calm and collected queenly mask fall away entirely. It’s the one emotion she’s never had much practice at containing, so when it comes out, it really comes out. Violence is basically a guarantee at that point.
Edgy/misc OC ask meme ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ
Send me a number and an OC, and I'll answer.
What memory would your OC rather just forget?
What's something about your OC that people wouldn't expect just from looking at them?
What is your OC's fatal flaw? Are they aware of this flaw?
When scared, does your OC fight, flee, freeze or fawn?
How far is your OC willing to go to get what they want?
How easily could your OC be convinced to do something that goes against their moral compass?
What's one way your OC has changed since you first came up with them?
Would your OC ostensibly be able to get away with murder?
Do you have a specific lyric or quote which you associate with your OC?
What's an AU that would be interesting to explore with your OC?
What is your OC's weapon of choice? Have they ever actually used it?
Is your OC self-destructive? In what ways?
If you met your OC, would the two of you get along?
How does your OC want to be seen by other characters?
Does your OC have a faceclaim? If so, who?
What is your OC's pain tolerance like?
What is the worst thing you have put your OC through story-wise?
Is your OC more cold and detached or up close and personal?
How does your OC behave when enraged?
Does your OC have a tendency to get jealous? If so, how does this manifest?
Does your OC have any illnesses or disorders? How do they handle it?
What character alignment would you consider your OC to be?
What emotion is the hardest for your OC to process? How about express?
What is an alternative life path your OC might have gone down? How different would their life be if they'd made those decisions?
What is your favorite thing about your OC?
#my ocs#percy jackson ocs#demititans#the tomb of time#my fic#oc ask game#Frieda Contritus#Pierce#Maya#Siren#Lots of love for Frieda with my discord friends <3#No love for Hunter lmao
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Oh my God, you mentioned wanting to write a thing about when Starrk finally let's his reiatsu out, and honestly, I've been thinking about that so much!!! Like here is Starrk, who has been keeping his reiatsu down to around average, who sleeps all the time, so doesn't stand out, who stands beside Ichigo, Ichigo who crazy stands out, also Starrk who joins the 4th, the 4th who everyone else considers to be weaklings!! You imagine the look on everyone's face the first time he let's lose!?! Maybe some bullying goes too far, and Starrk, who nobody thinks much of, just smacks them down hard!!! And everyone is like WTF lol 😆
sorry, I just love the idea of when people realize that Starrk is actually strong like Ichigo!! So 😁 funny!! Anyway, thanks for sharing your thoughts about this. I love reading them.
Lol yes it's one of those scenes that you see happen in so many different ways and all of them would be fun. I'm undecided on how I want to do it Officially so I'm putting it off (or maybe I'll just write several of them lmao).
I imagine it would have to be very serious bullying for Starrk to take that much action, cuz like he really isn't the sort to step in for every little thing. If it happens to someone he considers one of his, he might note it down and then quietly go and prevent it from happening again from behind the scenes, but in real time, he'd rather diffuse the situation or leave it to the "victim" to handle it and only step in if it looks like they really can't, and even stepping in would just be a sharp word or two to run the bully off. He's not a straightforward bleeding heart the way Ichigo is, cuz the hit-the-problem-so-it's-no-longer-a-problem method is def Ichigo's go-to strategy, he would absolutely smack the shit out of someone bullying Asuka or Rangiku in front of him and be done with it right then and there, prob flaring his reiatsu without even meaning to cuz his control's a lot better these days but it's also kind of 0 to 50, well-hidden or flashing neon sign, no in-between unless he really concentrates 😂 It's another reason Starrk would have little reason of his own to act, cuz like Ichigo would absolutely beat him to it.
For me, I could prob imagine him unleashing his reiatsu/revealing his strength if someone's about to die and the threat is big enough that he actually has to flex. He's just not someone who'd easily show what he can do, and hiding it from the likes of Aizen and the Quincy wouldn't even be his top reason. It's more like lingering PTSD--his strength doesn't bother him anymore now that he's had years of proven control under his belt, and he's even needed every last bit of his power over the past decade of war, but subconsciously, he's still not 100% comfortable with just letting anyone feel it, even tho he has enough control now that it wouldn't hurt them unless he wants it to because what if? So like, his first instinct will always be to keep it locked down, and for minor stuff (altho minor is relative for him I guess lolol), pulling out that much power is def a last resort.
Again, it contrasts what Ichigo would do. Ichigo's just used to overkill. Like even before he got his powers, he learned that an overwhelming show of strength would solve most of his gangster-related problems very easily, plus he lived in a household where Isshin only backed off from kicking him into a wall or something by kicking first or kicking back. And then after he got his powers, it's not even really his fault that he internalized a "might is right" kind of mindset /points at the entire fucking SS invasion arc and honestly every arc after that/. And also he spent his first years of Shinigami-ing running around with an unsealed Zanpakutou and zero reiatsu control, being in a constant state of Shikai is natural for him, and (moving into this AU's headcanon territory) it took him several months into the Quincy War before he finally learned to seal it away and actually have other ways of fighting that isn't just flinging Getsuga Tenshous around. He uses Bankai the way other people use hand-to-hand combat or Kidou spells, so even now, his first instinct is to just hit the problem hard enough so that it won't get back up to do more harm, and for him, that applies to everything from schoolyard bullying to fighting monster-gods. And on top of all that, his actions are largely driven by emotion. More than anything else, his first reflex is to protect, and that often leads to him throwing way more power at a threat than he actually needs to. He knows how to be more subtle these days, but it's not his preferred method and def not a reflex either the way it is with Starrk.
Of course, Starrk also understands "might is right" just by dint of being a Hollow, but he's basically spent a thousand years as someone too strong for anyone to fuck with just by existing, so he doesn't have the same kind of exposure to physical conflict that Ichigo grew up with that would make violence his first instinct.
Aanndd omg this ran away from me lmao sorry, you get a speedrun analysis on Starrk and Ichigo instead 😅
TLDR I'm still not sure of any exact scenarios that would force Starrk to show his hand, I don't want to wait until a Sternritter shows up or a final showdown vs. Aizen happens because that would take forever before we get there (I mean I could just jump right in there since this isn't a whole fic, but in-universe-timeline-wise, I'd prefer it happening earlier), but it's difficult for me to imagine that something in everyday life or even just a Hollow extermination mission would be enough to make him reveal even a bit of what he can really do.
Case in point, if you remember that mission in SP canon where Shunsui brings Ichigo and Rangiku along on a mission into the Rukongai to gain experience, and Ichigo sees a Hollow about to attack Shinji who hadn't spotted it yet, but he also didn't want to leave Rangiku unprotected, he went straight for unsealing his Zanpakutou and basically hand-delivering a shopping list of unusual or downright unique abilities to Aizen via Gin. In this AU, if Starrk goes along, he would never do such a thing, and in fact, he'd stop Ichigo and just fire a damn Byakurai or something across the clearing and kill it that way. Even if Ichigo doesn't have the finesse to pull off a low-numbered Kidou spell on the fly, he could've chosen a higher-numbered one and that would've still revealed far less to Aizen than unsealing his Zanpakutou would. But again, subtlety isn't his strong suit. He now at least has the presence of mind to think about the consequence of leaping into the fray without thought, it would leave Rangiku wide open, but his first instinct is still to use overwhelming strength to protect the people he cares about.
In contrast, Starrk may be a soft touch compared to basically every other Hollow and quite a few Shinigami, but he has the maturity and just the general personality to go for the strategic option. He has a far more tactical mind, implied even in canon to rival Shunsui in that department, so rushing in just isn't in his nature.
The only other way imo is if someone just... asks. Reikaku (reiatsu-sensing) is a thing Shinigami learn. In canon people can sense exactly who's coming just by their reiatsu (if they know them), not just if they're a Shinigami or a Hollow or even a Human, but it doesn't really expand on how. So I imagine you have to have a good feel for the person's reiatsu, it's the same as my age headcanon for reiatsu, not only can someone halfway decent at sensing reiatsu be able to get an idea of the other person's age, they would also be able to recognize and associate that reiatsu signature with that person since everybody's is different, but obviously they would have to be exposed to it a few times to learn it. Starrk's reiatsu is very unique so once or twice would be enough, and I can see a situation where the kids might ask to feel it for that reason, or a mission might require the team leader to ask, etc. etc. So yeah, that's all I got.
#man this got long i'm sorry#and vaguely off-topic???#bleach#coyote starrk#kurosaki ichigo#ichigo & starrk time travel verse
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ahhh so. warning. will be talking about arcane s2 spoilers below the cut. i have. so! many. thoughts.
i've seen a few takes that s2 felt very rushed to some people, and like. yeah? i can get that. but also. not really.
there was A Lot of ground to cover so it moved very quickly but the pacing actually made a lot of sense to me. i think that this show has never attempted to tell each characters story in the fullest. like, to me, that's what makes the world building so good. you are only witnessing part of the story. there is only so much of each character that we, the viewers are allowed to see.
yes there was a lot introduced in the final act, yes some of it made zero sense. but, to me at least, it makes it so much more realistic and immersive.
the final act is war time. shit happens fast. decisions are made and acted upon almost immediately. there isn't time to mourn and there isn't time to grieve. if you stop, you will die so you must keep marching forward.
we don't get to see what signed is up to, we don't get to understand the complexities between mel and her mother, we don't get time to break down how the arcane is changing we just have to know that something is happening and it will affect us so we must do something to react.
moving on, i really wanna talk about jayce and viktor first because. their final discussion, had me ill. i'm honestly really glad that they are never officially established in the show, because it makes their bond that much stronger to me.
the first season, we see how their studies connected them and propelled them forward. in jayces case, it pushes him into politics. in viktors, deeper into the arcane. they had to set everything else aside *cough cough their morals and personal relationships(sky & each other)* in order to achieve what they wanted to achieve.
in the second season, we see how that was their demise. for viktor, the creators did an amazing job showing us this with the scene between him and sky.
'i'll miss our talks'
'no you won't'
like holy shit? in those two lines, we see how viktor has fundamentally changed. his goals, his objectives, they got lost somewhere. in the first season, we do see how much viktor enjoys discussing his ideals and thoughts, its what drives him to go and find jayce in the first place.
and as for jayce, he's icarus. he flew too close to the sun and he, in a lot of ways, is the beginning of the end. while ekko and heimerdinger were building their way out of the alt time line, he was witnessing the destruction his invention brought about.
and don't even get me started on them calling each other their partner during their entire last talk. like wtf im ILL.
okay! onto jinx! (and isha and vi) i have. heard a lot of complaints about how one- her death was for shock value and two- that isha's death was glossed over and i whole-heartily disagree.
i think first off, jinx isn't dead. there a lot of people out there who can put the details together more precisely than i care to tbh, but my biggest reason is the airship we see at the end. these creators LOVE their foreshadowing and i mean LOVE (think viktor showing off the invention and shooting that gun to how that gun is later used). i think it's literally the first episode that powder says she wants to ride in one and ur telling me the last episode we get a shot of one flying away? yeah no. my girl is alive and breaking the cycle.
speaking of breaking the cycle, vi would never be able to move on with her life if jinx is still around. she would never be able to grow, to be willing to work on her relationship with cait, would never be able to escape the guilt, etc etc. that's like, a big point that i think a lot of people are missing.
for vi, jinx is everything. and she should be. she is the only family she has left. and had she not walked away from her, there is NO TELLING what would've happened to the two of them.
jinx's 'death' was for the both of them. they can move on now, they are free to allow the shit show that was their childhood be in the past. like hello?????? did y'all not listen to the conversation that she had with ekko in the alt time line? you need to let go of some things to be able to move onto the next and it sucks and it hurts and its shitty but the world will keep spinning.
and the only way that jinx was able to come to this conclusion is because she lost isha. had isha still been around, she would have had to stick around zaun and piltover. but also. i need y'all to realize that jinx is used to losing people, she is used to grief, it is a close friend to her.
and i think, thematically too, vi not moving to the other ledge is SO IMPORTANT. she CAN'T let vander go. that was her father, that man raised her, she couldn't let him go. are y'all connecting the dots? like! hello! do you see?
vi has never been one to let someone she loves go lightly. the entire first season she is grappling with this idea that her sister changed, that she moved on and allowed herself to let her past (kinda) go. it doesn't make sense to her. she allows caitlyn back so easily because it terrifies her to lose someone in her life.
that is who she is in her core.
and that is why jinx makes the decision for her. it's her way of saying, 'i see you, i understand you and i will make the hard call for you because i love you'
so yeah, like i said. a lot of thoughts. im so excited to see wtf is going on in noxus in the future show and am so intrigued by whatever the fuck is going on with mel.
also. maybe it's just me. but i love an open ending. i think being able to talk about the what if's and the maybe is so much fun. not everything has to be wrapped up with a bow on top. again, we, the viewers, only get a small insight into the world the characters live in. this show could go on for ages if we followed them all the way through their lives. this was never meant to be that type of show. go watch friends or smthn if you want a formulaic story that will clean every lose end up for you.
we follow these characters through a formative moment in their life, what happens next is up to them. (and psst. that's what fan fiction is for)
#arcane s2 spoilers#if you read all of this i applaud you it was so much more than i meant it to be but i just couldn't stop writing#i have so many more lil thoughts too like the focus on jinx's hands/nails#the all pink in the alt time line had me sick to my stomach#and the way they were bloody and torn up when she was in the cell#and also her final convo with silco#silco i love you i miss you#omg i didn't even touch on the fucking sex scene#or ekko damn#or the god damn dance between ekko and jinx#maybe ill make a pt 2 to this later when i had the emotional energy to rewatch it#i need to go hydrate now tho bc i cried so fucking much#like i had to pause it multiple times because i couldn't see past the fucking tears#god i love this show#arcane act 3#arcane#jinx#vi arcane#jinx arcane#jayvik#jayce talis#viktor arcane
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i'm not putting blame on chris lmao are you stupid? i'm not blaming him for the tsunami either but if eddie behaved like the diaz parents are behaving they wouldn't be building a pool to try and distract chris and keep him in texas because he would never have gone near the water again. eddie and chris should be working things out together but they're not because his parents care more about their second chance baby than what's best their son and grandson.
...are you really taking this fight to an entire different blog?
you're not actually basing this on anything that happened in the show. you hate the diaz parents and so are ascribing them all these nefarious intentions. there is zero evidence that they are trying to distract chris and keep him in texas.
and what i said still stands. the only "issue" chris has right now is a trust issue with dad, which is absolutely completely 100% earned. yeah, eddie is the main character of the two, he's whose head we're in during this story, but some of y'all need to actually put yourself in chris' shoes about this, because it's really not some simple thing to get over. thinking your dead parent has come back to life, only to find that no, that's not your mom, your mom is still dead, this is just a woman that looks absolutely identical to her, down to the hair and clothes! because chris never saw her as kim, only as the shannon!doppler. and your dad has been secretly seeing this woman who looks like your dead mother for weeks.
i don't think some of y'all grasp how fucked up that is. you're acting like eddie just kept a secret from chris or something. there is nothing chris needs to do, eddie is the only one who needs to work on his issues, and prove that to chris. can you honestly say eddie's done any of the work needed for chris to believe that? sitting and missing his son isn't going to heal him. shaving his mustache and dancing in his underwear isn't going to heal him. church might help in the healing but all that did was tell eddie he deserved to drink juice. therapy, talking about it, dealing with the repressed grief and anger about shannon and all that goes with their relationship, that is what eddie needs. and he has not done that.
a home pool and chess with grandpa isn't whats keeping him there. chris is still with the his grandparents and shows no signs of wanting to leave because he clearly doesn't have to worry about what he's walking into every time he opens the front door, unlike with eddie.
srsly, what would you have chris do? facetime eddie every night to listen to eddie apologize and promise it'll never happen again? tell me exactly what actions you think chris should be doing in this situation
#cleo gets mail#anonymous#911#eddie diaz#christopher diaz#i guess this is the we hate shitty parents fandom until your fave character is the shitty parent#and before ppl come at me because they can't understand something unless it's spelled out in 50 cent words#no i'm not saying eddie is a bad parent#i'm saying he did something that negatively affected his son in an extreme way#anyway i know this is a tv show and we're used to crazy things happening on tv#but i'm sorry that is an extremely fucked up thing for chris to witness and ppl want to brush over it so easily it's insane
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Why Farin Urlaub's support for Flake means so much to me
Had a short conversation with @marimayscarlett about that topic that made me realize something...so here you have a little personal post about my thoughts and feelings about that collab between Flake and Farin Urlaub (member of the german band Die Ärzte).
I loved die Ärzte from my childhood, my older brother introduced me to them. I started loving them and becoming an active fan around the age of...14 maybe (I'm now 36). Farin was always my favourite member. I was a die-hard fan for many, many years, went to several concerts, watched every bit of them on television, listened to their interviews, read everything I found about them. Especially about Farin. For me, he's one of the most intelligent people I "know". I love his views on things, value his opinions, admire his openess, his modesty, his creativity, his very balanced opinions. He reads and travels a lot, and it definitely shows. I would love to meet him and just listen to his storys. I really, really admire him as a person. He had a huge impact on my life as a teen, he also formed my inner moral compass. He's for example the reason why I never got into drinking alcohol (took a sip here and there, but gladly never started). My fan-fire for Die Ärzte has cooled down and made room for Rammstein, but I still am a huge fan of the man himself.
When that Row-Zero shit started last year, needless to say, I was devastated. My fan bubble was about to burst, I had a huuuuge moral conflict, as I'm sure most of us had. Was it still OK to like this band? To visit their concerts? To listen to their music? To write fanfiction about them? After many (!!!) conversations, read articles, listened podcasts and more conversations I decided that, YES, I can still enjoy this band without betraying myself and my moral compass. Till Lindemann doesn't equal Rammstein. The whole band surely has some sort of responsibility for what happened. But for me this was/is not a reason to turn my back on them. I heard (via youtube-videos from concerts) that Die Ärzte made some comments on that topic during their shows in 2023, they made some (bad) jokes about it. All in all, it was such a hard time with many hard discussions and difficult feelings.
I had to heal after this.
Now seeing Farin Urlaub, probably my most beloved celebrity, hero of my teenage-years and sculptor of my moral compass making a song and a video together with Flake, member of the ostracized band Rammstein....this really, really feels incredible. It's like an official OK, that my decision to stick with this band and to still love them is okay.
Seeing that Farin Urlaub obviously can differentiate between all the accusations, the accused persons, the band, the media...that he formed his own opinion and decided that it's okay to collab with him...this feels like healing to me. As I said, I have a very high opinion on Farin Urlaub. So seeing this sign from him makes me sooo incredibly happy and relieved. Obviously there's a shitstorm going on in the guestbook on Farin Urlaub's webpage - many people are disappointed by him.
I myself am very, very grateful and happy.
Danke Farin <3
Thank you so much if you really read that whole post :-* (screenshot by @mann-gegen-mann-in-real-life
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What I would give to get a lestappen padel date this weekend
#lestappen#this is super random#and there are zero signs of this happening#but imagine if they did!!#that would make up for almost everything
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Do you think that low birth-rates are a problem?
I think they're the opposite of a problem :)
#signs of women's freedom of choice#and it means women are more free to do what they want and they aren't being in life-threatening labour situations as much!#and less children are being born into this dystopian capitalistic climate crisis#less suffering is introduced to the world#capitalism gains less if there's less people to exploit#it's all win for me#lets get those low birth rates near zero#finally human life could become valuable#wars could stop#honestly all good things happen when women are able to choose their own lives#i love it#i saw a video today saying fast fashion is starting to crumble#feeling very optimistic :)))))))
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Having beaten the game again, I am further convinced that Joshua lived and Clive died.
#ooc ; out of character#[[ 'jill smiles when she looks out at sea she just see clive' ]]#[[ jill is smiling at the sunrise because it literally stopped happening during primogenesis and it's a sign the world has been saved ]]#[[ narratively it makes zero sense for clive to see the joshua flashbacks and then not give his life to resurrect him ]]#[[ it bookends clive's story perfectly ]]#[[ 'but books says clive will be a writer' if you talk to him he says the same thing about joshua ]]#[[ that joshua could rival moss ]]#[[ and i just also think it'd be really weird for clive to!!! take on joshua's name after his death ]]#[[ anyways that's it that my tedtalk ]]
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i realised why this is getting me so badly btw it's because. i made a post a while ago saying that last life was painful as fuck for me to think about but it was manageable because etho doesnt get too hard into the roleplay and just sort of chills and laughs and doesnt show much signs of distress when bdubs is very clearly manipulating and dragging him into this toxic ass relationship. okay well now imagine me making that post and ethoslab seeing that and going im gonna fucking kill this guy
#mine#like he ISNT but hes. UGH.#this is a billion times worse in every way. its okay though. im sane now.#if this had happened like six months ago i probably would have done something drastic.#once again i must tap the sign. Traffic is not just a Minecraft series it's real life and I was there#This post makes like zero sense sorry I'll probably delete it in a minute my head hurts
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Haven't really posted about this but long-time headcanon of mine that what happened to the Kurashikis for them to end up at the hospital was that Akane got sick but pushed through it still going to school and not telling anyone about it because she would see Aoi pushing himself during flu season to keep going to work and learned to do the same through observation, not wanting to bother him or anyone else with something so minor until one too many days without getting treated later she collapses at school and gives everyone a big scare that the teacher needs to send her to the hospital for and realistically in my mind at least there's no way Aoi would be able to get her in or out of there without someone flagging cps unless someone saw this kid come pick up his little sister at odd hours with a story that wasn't matching up and realized that's a prime target for unethical science shit
#this post brought to you by. am sick#I have actually posted about how from the few kids from the first nonary game that we know of they have something that made them vulnerable#as targets having disabilities/a single mother and there's no doubt in my mind these two were#targeted because they were suddenly in a position where it was obvious that they were on their own#and it just happened to be the worse possible people that spotted it before anyone else#of course that could just not be how the japanese health system works but at least in here a guardian needs to sign stuff for minors#I'd assume that's the same there but I am far too sick to think of how to look that specific thing up lol#also I'm fine just got back from the hospital I just have a headache because medicine expensive#also sun far too strong for winter#zero escape#999 spoilers#nine hours nine persons nine doors 🧭#akane kurashiki#aoi kurashiki#escape room convention but it's a time loop
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genuinely so angry about this. you gave us a red-maned man with a big ol nose in the botw tapestry only for it to just have been another little white boy? no ganon? no hero ganon? like i was really hoping he'd have been the chosen hero but demise's curse and all of his previous reincarnation history has doomed him into being seen as evil by the kingdom he saved, and his portrayal as a villain in TOTK would have been his rage after what the people he loved did to him. that would have made a very good story about fate and the harm hatred can do but no that isn't what we're getting. did i expect nintendo to go the classic "ganon is evil!" route? yes. am i happy that they did after 30+ years of "ganon is evil!" formula? no of fucking course. i want more insight on him as a person and his culture. i want more lore on how he feels as a gerudo male and how he feels being born into a curse or being born as someone history has always scorned. but we'll never get it and that kills me
#ganon rambles#rant#totk#totk spoilers#im soooooo upset#i just. i love ganon so much and every game he's watered down to big bad evil man just to focus on hylian culture#and hylia and whatnot#i wanted this game to get into GANON'S side of the story#but keep link as the main focus to give the game some sense of misunderstanding on the player's part#as the player slowly unlocks the truth throughout gameplay#but based on the leaks? that's not what's gonna happen#i was just hoping the reason ganon as a demon has become so powerful#is because his heart was broken by the kingdom#and thats why he's stronger than ever#the fate he's tied to took him over using his broken heart#and he couldnt fight it and he was sealed#he's in regular clothes and jewelry! there is zero sign in his corpse that he was ACTUALLY TRYING to cause harm#in the moment he died! he is dressed as though he was welcome into the castle#not dressed for battle#i really love ganon and i see him as human too not just a demon with no motive but destruction#and yes ofc i love him for that. id be a fake ganon fan if i didnt think it was hot that he loved killing and violence#but while id love to keep my twisted and insane OOT and TP and WW ganons...#a good ganon that the game tells us about that gives us a view at his life and culture#that wouldve been so good#cuz all we get about this man is that hyrule treats his people like ass and he uses that as an excuse to kill civilians#i wanted to see how the kingdom treated the infamous male gerudo as a hero. i want to know WHY the gerudo grew pointed ears.#i want to know everything about him and his people but we never will because he's just the villain#and the gerudo are just a racist in game fanservice#ganondorf#totk neg
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have you ever considered that vecna can, and probably will, target them both and the rest of the entire crew? why do you ship byler if you don't think there are signs mike is queer? if you hate mike so much you're so angry at people theorising about a compelling story that involves him, just say so
Nowhere did I suggest I hate Mike. I hate the way people have been characterizing him lately and basically give him the same story as Will. This is something that's been bothering me for months and I only said something because I thought I finally found someone who understood where I was coming from. It's so invalidating to Will's character and disingenuous to Mike's to make their stories basically exactly the same.
Saying Mike's aware of his sexuality, realized his feelings for Will between s3 and s4, struggles with wondering if Will will accept him is WILL'S STORY. And I'm getting so sick of seeing it every single time I browse my tl.
It feels like everyone's so caught up in Mike liking Will they lose sight of everything else about him. Mike's struggles are so different from Will's, and that's a good thing. I wouldn't want them to be the same. I want them to be queer in their own way and have their own thoughts/feeling about their sexuality. I don't want Mike's story to be Will's and I can't understand why everyone else seems like they do.
Mike went his whole life fully believing he was straight. And I don't see any solid evidence proving otherwise. Mike's struggle is coming to accept that he isn't who he thought he was. He's been avoiding and fighting his feelings for a long time now. His story is about how fighting who you are will only make you unhappy, and even though it's an incredibly scary thing to do, accepting your true feelings will ultimately make you happier.
Mike and Will's stories are different because they have different morals. While Mike's is more focused on self-acceptance after being in denial, Will's leans more toward self-love after being abused for his whole life. Will has to fight how much he's internalized everything people have said about him. Will has already had to face the people who hate him for who he is. Mike hasn't experienced homophobic bullying. He doesn't have nearly the same level of internalized homophobia as Will.
And that's what irks me the most is when people will try and say Mike's story revolves around internalized homophobia and that Vecna is going to target him despite the fact there's no clear foreshadowing and no apparent reason for Vecna to do so. I feel like I'm always just seeing the same stuff and no one is branching off to say "hey, maybe Mike won't be targeted and will instead have a more detailed and personal arc about him coming to accept himself and his feelings" instead of "Vecna's gonna torment him with Will" which is literally exactly what they've been foreshadowing will happen to Will.
Making their stories the same just makes it feel like there's a "certain way" to be queer when that's just not true. I want Mike's story to be very different from Will's. I want Mike and Will to have unique struggles. I want two different stories being told to represent how there is no one way to be queer.
Why is that so hard for people to understand?
#this theory in particular rubs me the wrong way#ive been ignoring it for ages now#i feel like it undermines the point of how every character has thier own struggles that makes them different#even robin and vickes stories are quite different#but every time people talk about s5 mike it always feels like theyre unintentionally making him be like will#it feels like people are losing sight of who mike is in favor of seeing the story they want to see#and im tired of everyone acting like mike definitely knows he gay when there is zero obvious signs of that#if the ga cant pick up on it it has an insanely low chance of happening#st is an extremely predictable show#ily st writers but its true#bi mike wheeler#gay mike wheeler#will byers#byler
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the last remaining threads of my sanity are slipping through my fingers rn 🚬 😑
#i'm out of cigarettes i'm incredibly ill and i'm reconsidering my relationship to a certain fandom.#look i'm NOT saying i'm gonna stop the divorce proceedings but uh. fuck. i may have been re reading some of my older works and unfinished#fics and i MAY. i repeat MAY. have some tiny shred of interest posting about st*r w*rs again#motherfucker i'm SO hesitant to speak that into existence and will be absolutley APOPLECTIC if it happens bc i don't fucking WANNA like sw!#i divorced it! i took the kids (my ocs) & filed a restraining order & crossed state lines & broke all contact and yet! and fucking yet!!!!#i find myself in tags i havent visited in over two years on the archive like some beaten dog slinking back home to a shitty master#i honestly hate like. fucking ALL of the shit i've written from then that i reread and some of it was so bad i couldnt even bring myself to#click on it after reading the summary. like. UGH! i have a half baked fic idea i wrote a little for and i think it's more compelling than#any of the literal dogshit i posted back then so i MIGHT work on polishing that up and posting something that isn't actual garbage by my#current standards. all of this is still up in the air tho bc i dont know if the hyperfixation or even the bare minimum lvl of interest has#returned or if it's just fever induced delirium. i've been having INCREDIBLY fucked up bad horrible awful vivid dreams as of late so fever#induced brain fuckery isn't out of the question. sigh. i'm so mad abt this#even if i do regain some interest in the fandom i don't think i'll have any interest in new source material after the mando s2 finale &#tbo.bf sucking ass & the obi show being mid & everything with the ST. i plan on watching ando.r but after that? zero interest in anything#new from sw. so. if anyone still reading this and is getting excited abt me POSSIBLY MAYBE being interested in sw just know i still hate it#a bit and feel like i'm being dragged kicking and screaming back into this mess unwillingly. or it's due to a fever. god i need a smoke#len speaks#that's literally the longest tag rant i've ever gone on. fuck that's a BAD sign
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Me: *still hasn't started my assignment that's due at noon tomorrow*
Spotify: hey did you know there's a concert being held nearby for an artist you like on your birthday next year :)
Me, doesn't even like celebrating my birthday but needs no prompting to be distracted: oh really? Well I need to know more right this second
#ace is a mess#Uni shenanigans#Biomed sciences#i was shopping cus im stressing about Christmas presents had finally decided to focus up and i get an email about a concert near me#like damn if that isnt a sign that im not meant to do this assignment#i dont go to concerts theyre not really my thing but its near its cheap and it happens to be my on my birthday which i also prefer to ignor#the signs are lining up esp as i didnt want to go home for my birthday and my bestie was tryna convince me to stay for it#i mean my mums always complaining about how im wasting my early twenties being boring so maybe i should#........i literally require zero convincing to not do something im not interested in even if the offered distraction isnt even that great#the assignment shouldnt be difficult i just have to start but i dont want to thats literally the hardest part is convincing myself to start
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I'd have to say one of the cutest, novel moments in a romance manga I read recently was when one of the characters noticed the other's behavior and thought it seemed like the other character had feelings for him, but then he told himself off for making assumptions about other people's feelings lol
#coyo speaks#it just felt like something you don't see very often#especially just like... where it's not a moment of him being all cool like I know you're in love with me yada yada#but that very grounded moment of like recognizing the signs but not wanting to make assumptions#I think the only thing I'd really criticize about that manga is that I don't think the sex scene was necessary#it's not that notable ig while reading it#but if you think about it for too long it happened way too early in their relationship#for context the one who caught feelings was a cat who ~wished to be human~#but like... he's been human for like a few months at MOST#He just has a lot less understanding and reference than your average virgin#and he wasn't the one who initiated and he seemed confused the whole time#idk I just feel like a character who has ZERO frame of reference for how relationships work should've properly taken things slower#although that's framed weird bc like I said it's not him that pushed things that fast#and I think it would be different if he was the one who initiated things where like maybe he doesn't really understand it#but he wants it whatever it is#I just really think he should've been setting the pace as the one with the least experience#as it stands I don't feel like he even knew enough to know what he wants#so for someone he has such strong feelings and trust in to be like 'I'm going to show you something good'#he's not very likely to contest that... if his partner says it's good and he can't really figure out his own feelings#then obviously it must be good regardless of how he feels#thinking that hard about random single volume BL manga is never going to turn up great results tho lol
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if they actually make a loz film and have link speak in it i'm literally not watching it. if a studio doesn't have the capacity to tell a story through the protagonist's actions and expressions as opposed to with words i don't see the point.
#with mario it was like. he barely speaks but it happens. it makes sense for him to be voiced (even if he spoke too much imo)#the only things link has spoken in has been spinoffs. all the cutscenes are fully voiced and he doesn't say a damned thing.#yeah there's dialogue coming from him but he makes zero noises while talking leading me to believe he uses sign language.#he is nonverbal and if he isn't portrayed as such if and when (considering the mario movie's success) the loz movie is created#that better be reflected on the big screen
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