#and theon just

[dipperscavern]

@cdragons & i were having some thoughts about secondincommand!reader.. specifically how she’d react to robb breaking his oath with the freys. believe it or not, they’re in love with each other. i don’t make the rules (yes i do)

tags — (@ghostinvenus)

secondincommand!reader who is the glue that holds the war camp together & keeps it running smoothly

secondincommand!reader who isn’t the strongest person out there, but don’t let that fool you. you’re often seen dragging 6’0+, 200lb northmen by the ear — giving them a scolding that would make tywin lannister look like a kitten

most problems are laid at your feet, not that robb doesn’t do anything, but the chain of command makes them be brought to you first. you have a knack for fixing things, and sarcasm runs through your veins where blood should be. you has nothing, if not the audacity

tough as nails, and fears only the gods, all the northmen call you doe. they say you’re the long lost daughter of stannis baratheon, stubborn as a mule, you’ll break before you bend.

so one can imagine how happy you are when you find out the king in the north broke his oath and married a nurse.

you give robb the absolute cold shoulder when you hear the rumors are true. robb and talisa stroll through the camp on their horses, and when you see them, you just stand there. theon glances at your stiffness, before you turn around and just walk away.

ʚ‎‏ ͜ ̩͙ ︵ ̩͙ ୨ ♡ ୧ ̩͙ ‏︵ ̩͙ ͜ ɞ

robb thought he was going crazy.

you had always been said to hold the camp & northmen together, and now, with you not on his side — he’s finding out how true that really is.

you haven’t spoken to him since he left & returned with talisa, abandoning his oath with the freys. if he asked you a question during a meeting, you’d answer the lord closest to you, as if he had asked you that, instead of robb. you had even resorted to speaking to him through theon, who found it hilarious.

“C’mon, Doe- you have to speak to me sooner or later.”

he’s this close to begging at this point. you merely turn to theon.

“Theon, do you hear that? It sounds like.. it sounds like a fucking idiot.”

theon nods. “Been a lot of those lately. Think it’s seasonal.”

robb runs his hands down his face as they both walk out, and eventually he confides in talisa about it. after all, she is his wife. she approaches you after a meeting, while you’re gathering her things to leave.

“I’m sorry if you’re unhappy with me, I’m only trying to do my best.”

you don’t miss a beat. “You’ve only put all our lives in jeopardy and half-way ensured we lose the war. Why should I be unhappy with you?”

she’s surprised by your boldness. talisa swallows thickly. “Feel how you will about me, Robb is your king. You should speak with him soon.”

you turn around, looking at her, brows pinched in faux empathy.

“I’m sorry- I don’t speak with southerners. Gives me the chills.”

“I’ve been in the North for many moons.”

“How interesting.” you finish gathering your stuff, walking out of the tent with lord karstark trailing beside you. he leans over to rub your shoulders.

“I can feel ya’ shiverin, child.” you both laugh, walking on.

ʚ‎‏ ͜ ̩͙ ︵ ̩͙ ୨ ♡ ୧ ̩͙ ‏︵ ̩͙ ͜ ɞ

your silence was eventually replaced by nonsense, and robb considered letting the lannisters march in here and put him out of his misery.

you had taken to speaking the language of old valyria, for all robb could guess. and the men around him could be none the wiser, theon included.

“Karstark, you’ll lead the vanguard. And Doe, you’ll command the archers.”

“Mememememeh..” you said, rolling your eyes. theon nodded.

“Agreed.”

he thought someone would stop you eventually, but no, he failed to recognize these men adored you. their little doe, a spitfire who could demand their lives & they’d fall on their swords.

“Stew good, Doe?” he asked, walking by the campfire you sat at.

“Ehmemememeh..” you said, shaking your head. the men sat around you only nodded, murmurs of agreement to each other spilling from their lips.

and when you did start talking to robb again (in the common tongue), he almost wished for the silence to return. no he didn’t.

“Glad you’ve started speaking with me again.”

“Tell me, how much speaking will we be doing if Walder Frey decides to behead us?”

he opens his mouth to speak, but you raise a hand.

“If I die because His Grace, King Robb, saw a bit of arse & his cock forgot the oath he swore, I am going to kill you.”

he thought the northern lords were going to burst a blood vessel with how hard they tried to hold in their laughter. in the end, their efforts did not prevail.

[maculategiraffe]

man if I was a russian mob boss and my worthless layabout son killed baba yaga's dog I'd just fucking give him up. like immediately. like call john wick's secret basement landline and be like "iosef's at the club. all his goons and bodyguards have been instructed to stand down. there's a new puppy on your front porch. do you want an edible arrangement or anything"

[lmaowh-at]

Catelyn heard someone snigger behind her. She loves him, poor thing, she thought sadly. She'd play his squire just to touch him, and never care how great a fool they think her... (and some other things)

[angelwingtrap]

A bird of suspiciously human-like sentience and symbolic dreams have been trying to get Jon’s attention RELENTLESSLY for 5 books straight and he is utterly clueless.

Meanwhile Theon has one (1) divine experience and is like “ohh I see there’s some shit going on here…the gods have plans for me…the ravens and the trees speak…they know my name…wow there sure a lot of ravens in the heart tree today…I’ll take the cue from the tree and find strength in myself to become Theon again to fufill my purpose”

[naggascradle]

Covers for A Game of Thrones, I (Jon Snow) II (Daenerys Targaryen) III (Tyrion Lannister) IV (Catelyn Stark) V (Ned Stark) & A Clash of Kings, I (Arya Stark) II (Theon Greyjoy) III (Sansa Stark) IV (Davos Seaworth) V (Bran Stark), drawn by Ken Sugiwara for the Japanese paperback release of A Song of Ice and Fire.

[wulfhall]

the saddest yet funniest bit in asoiaf is easily when theon returns to the iron islands and spends about an hour dressing up in his nicest furs and silks and wools and jewellery and goes to see the father he hasn’t seen in a decade. and balon is immediately like what sort of metrosexual nonsense have you picked up on the mainland? oh you’re wearing a necklace you bought? paid for? didn’t steal it from the corpse of a man you killed? are you fucking gay or something and theons like

okay sorry :( anyway dad do you want to read this letter from robb stark?

[babylonfelldown]

I saw a tiktok about Jon and Theon and it made me remember how fuking insane their dynamic is

They're broken mirrors of each other: both of them just want the starks to see them as family, they want to feel wanted, they envy and hate each other.

Theon is a trueborn son of a great house, an heir even, but at the same time he's treated as a squire and a ward when convenient, (he helps Ned and Robb), he's also seen as a hostage and a threat, never quite trustworthy. He says repeatedly that he never felt wellcome by the Starks and that the only one to have any affection for him was Robb. Theon dreams to be wed to Sansa, not because he loves her, but because them he would be a son for Ned. He envies Jon because even being a bastard he's loved by Ned (ln a way neither Ned or his actual father loved him), his sibilings (all of them) love him, even if Lady Stark doesn't like him, he is family in Theon's eyes.

Jon is a bastard, he's a shame that must remain hidden, it doesn't matter how much Ned or his sibilings love him, he will never be a true Stark in the eyes of westerosi society. He is trusted but his loyality is always at question, Jon is a threat to Robb's claim in many peoples eyes, like he wants his brothers birthright, and the worst of it all is: he does. He desperately wants to be a trueborn son, but he loves Robb deeply, more than he could ever wish to be legitimate. He envies Theon because he is a trueborn son, he is an heir, he will get to have a wife and children of his own, legitimate children that won't be called names.

Truely insane dynamic of hatred and envy that culminates with both of them trying to one up each other on everything.

[owlsinathens]

Like twins

[soup-in-my-fly]

🧪⚡️HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!! May I TREAT you with a loosely frankenstein-inspired au? :3

[⚠️slight NSFW under the cut]

Theon and Ramsay both attend the university of Ingolstadt. Whereas Theon got accepted because of pure nepotism, Ramsay actually had to be SMART to study there. Typical Thramsay rivalry ensues, and Ramsay ends up deciding that Theon would make a PERFECT candidate for his crimes against nature.

[15-lizards]

ASOIAF modern AU class/wealth distinctions bc in the wise words of Mod Sam from the Inn at The Crossroads Discord: “i love modern aus where theyre like oh yeah the lannisters are filthy rich and here's the starks, piling into a minivan to go to public school. they would not fucking do that”

Lannisters: Private jets and COO/CEO/CFO positions at the family company and plain white tshirts that cost $5000. 1% of the 1%. They’re the Roys we already know this no need to elaborate.

Starks: they’re a rugged type of Minnesota/North Dakota/Wyoming wealth. Land rich. Own ranches and mining operations and oil drilling companies. Ppl think they’re normal bc they look like average farmers until they get a tour of their 300,000 acres and private mountain. Seem down to earth but grew up breeding ranch horses, don’t really understand what a car note is, and Nedcat paid for all the starklings college apartments. Also wear normal looking vests and ranching jeans and boots that cost absurd amounts

Tyrells: masters at the “quiet wealth” bullshit. Wayyyy older money compared to the Lannisters, and aren’t aggressive/scrappy like them bc of it. Literal aristocracy like lords or barons or some shit. Multiple residences, family tradition of politics, and loads of passive income. Maybe run a newspaper or two and own some global shipping companies bc of their merchant roots or whatever. Margaery was at one of those international debutante balls for the ubër-wealthy.

Tullys: Not as rich as the Tyrells or Lannisters but still nothing to scoff at. Not upper middle class but more like lower rungs of the upper class. Family tradition of sending all the kids to boarding school (that’s where Lysa got pregnant 🙂‍↕️) and they have some nice yachts and the like. Have one really nice permanent house on the river, a summer house upstate, and an apartment in the city. Normal enough to blend in with most people at their school. Also made their money thru shipping lanes.

Martells: Southern oil barons. Nymeria emigrated over and immediately discovered oil on her apparently shitty piece of land. Thousands of acres dedicated to drilling and cattle ranching. Awful for the environment but greenwash the fuck out of their business. Good at being a man of the ppl despite literally being in the one percent. Very publicly donate to progressive charities and causes to offset the backlash they get from pay the people who work for them slave wages. People stan them on Twitter because they’re hot and not like other billionaires.

Baratheons: slightly newer money but old enough to have no excuse to act the way they do. Loud annoying displays of wealth. Made their fortune mostly because they were good at being overly aggressive when it came to the stock market or sales or smthn idk what they do. Robert buys an egregious house in Florida where him and some other rich repulsive republicans do Labor Day weekend on their yachts with women they paid to be there. Absolutely terrible at saving their money (except Stannis and kinda Renly) and quite literally have to have their accounts frozen by their investment bankers. Actively going bankrupt.

Greyjoys: Not even rich anymore. Had a sizable shipping company at one point before they got poached bought out by the Lannisters. Also they engaged in too much tax fraud and embezzlement so now no one wants to touch them with a ten foot pole. Still live in their dilapidated cliffside house that’s literally ab to crumble into the sea. Theon got to live with the Starks bc once the Greyjoys got audited Ned felt bad.

Targaryens: REAL old money that stretches back like at least 500 years. Have had multiple income sources over the years and almost all of it is blood money of some kind and extracted through violence :) Giant ass portraits of their ancestors in their multiple residences, they all speak Valyrian at home, and they don’t even go to school it’s just private tutors. Obscene wealth that isn’t even fathomable to most people. Famously bred race horses and hunting dogs for a while until there was some familial infighting about ownership of the racetracks and stables and that collapsed. Got audited and investigated twenty years ago and Aerys just killed himself instead of going to jail.

[lycorim]

Iron Islands naming conventions are soooo funny because on one hand you have the most viking-ass names that ever did exist you've got Stygg you've got Gelmarr you've got Harl Jorl Qarl you've got Ragnor. A good number of them overlap with Freefolk names (idk what to do with that information either). But then a small handful would better fit in a Jane Austen novel with how fucking posh they sound in isolation. This is a post about Tristifer Botley.

[dipperscavern]

secondincommand!reader getting hurt shielding robb during battle.. rubbing my hands & feet together like a fly on the wall

word count: 1.4k.. how to say oopsie in 14 different languages

robb stark x f!secondincommand!reader

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜.・。.・゜✭・.

war was unpredictable. anything could happen, nothing was guaranteed — except one thing. war was bloody.

he hated every time you fought with him. robb knew why you did, of course. how can you command men you won’t even fight for? why should they listen to someone who’s afraid to get their hands dirty?

you weren’t budging on it. as queen in the north, you had to fight for the people who chose you to rule them, and for the lands they’d settle on/return to after the war. robb could barely focus when fighting, knowing you were out there, but he was king in the north. he had to stand strong & lead by example, so he did. & things went well enough.

until they didn’t.

robb always led the vanguard, constantly put wherever the fighting was thickest. you were usually commanding the archers, being better with a bow than you were with a sword. though skilled with both, you didn’t mind being with the archers, & theon sometimes joined you. robb felt a bit better having you away from where it was bloodiest, and you had to compromise somewhere.

the battle had gone as smoothly as battle could go so far, until you broke from the archers & took an arrow for robb.

luckily, the archer wasn’t a great shot, the arrow lodging in your upper thigh. but to robb, it didn’t matter where it settled — you were hurt.

the man who shot you was quickly cut down, & robb caught you from falling. his head swam, vision going fuzzy from the thought of you being hurt. he would’ve paused the whole goddamn war right then and there, if theon didnt wrap your arm around his shoulder and promise to get you to the medic tent.

he wanted to keep you with him, take you there himself, but theon argued-

“there’s still fighting to be done!”

& robb knew he was right. with a silent prayer to the old gods, he mounted once more, ignoring the pain in his chest as he drew his sword.

✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼

robb’s head was swimming, filled with thoughts of only you. as soon as the fighting was done, he set off to find you. nothing could stop him, & anyone who was in his way knew to get the fuck out of it. he spotted theon escorting you back to you & his shared tent, one of your arms slinked around his shoulders. you had a bandage wrapped around your upper thigh, spots of blood showing through the fabric as you hobbled as best you could.

he ran over, entering the tent just as theon was gently setting you down on one of the chairs inside.

“thanks, theon-“

“what in seven hells was that? hm?”

you & theon’s heads turned to look at him, both of you caught by surprise at his tone. you swallowed, looking at theon — a silent plea to leave before robb’s anger turned to him. he looked at you both, before turning & walking out.

“that was me-“

“almost getting killed?”

“protecting my king.”

robb just blinks, looking at you for a second. he can’t understand how you aren’t as utterly distraught as he felt in that moment, catching you in his arms as you fell.

“y’can’t just do that! just- take arrows whenever you feel like it!”

this is the first time robb has yelled at you. ever. you know he doesn’t mean it — or at least, that’s what you’re telling yourself, to keep the tears at bay.

“i would do it again.”

robb huffs out a laugh, turning around and looking at the floor, before looking at you once more.

“this is war, okay? i don’t have time to watch you while ‘m puttin’ a sword through a man’s belly!”

“then don’t?!”

“looks like i have to!” he says, motioning to the bandage on your thigh.

you sigh, “this is war, robb. people get hurt.”

he only shakes his head.

“gods- i shouldn’t have to watch over you like a child. y’should be better than that..” he says, turning & leaving you alone in the tent.

and for once, you’re glad robb leaves. the tears rolling down your cheeks wouldve embarrassed you if he saw.

✼　 ҉ 　✼　 ҉ 　✼

you weren’t mad at him. by rights, you should be, & if you were, you knew nobody would blame you — but you weren’t.

you had prided yourself on being the person to fix everything. you were always the solution, not the problem. you hated the shame you felt, and even though you’d take the arrow for robb a hundred times more, you hated when he was mad at you.

still, you knew robb would come to you when he was ready. he rarely let his emotions get the best of him, & you knew how much stress he was under. you sat at the table, maps & books spread out in front of you. you were upset, and burying yourself in your work was a reasonable solution.

you stayed up until the wee hours of the morning, back aching from your hunched over form. you sighed, finally deciding to turn into the bed that’s been calling your name.

wandering hands & soft calls of your name woke you up.

you opened your eyes, brain still clouded with the fog of sleep. you woke up quickly, seeing robb’s form above you.

“robb?”

“hey, pretty.”

your brows furrowed, cheeks heating at his comment. “thought you were mad at me..”

he shook his head, gaze softening. “came to say ‘m sorry. can i?”

you nodded, tongue darting out to wet your lips. he leaned down, pressing his lips to yours. his tongue swiped across your bottom lip, your own parting to give him access.

“‘m sorry.”

he mumbled against your lips, kissing you again. his lips trailing down your neck, mumbled apologies spilling from his lips between kisses.

your breathing gets heavier as he trails down, removing your nightgown & his own clothes.

“when i saw y’ take that arrow.. gods, doe..”

he’s gentle. he always is, but more so than ever before. he’s taking his time, full on cherishing you. it’s clear in the gentleness of his calloused, war stricken hands. the very same hands that had taken the lives of lannister soldiers earlier that day were now caressing you, softly roaming your body & sliding into the slick place between your thighs.

“wanted to stop the damn war right then, right there. hold you close, never let you go.”

he feels you clench on his fingers at his words. hot pleasure shoots up your spine, the throbbing pain in your thigh now reduced to a forgotten ache. he wants to do this for the rest of his life, he thinks. take off the crown, bed you all day long. give you so much pleasure you forget a time where anything ever went wrong, fill your brain with thoughts of only him, him, him. he makes a silent promise to do so, once you both return to winterfell. reward you for all the times you’ve saved his arse out here.

“y’couldve.. wouldn’t have- mm! complained..”

he chuckles at your words, tilting his head to the side.

“yeah? woulda liked that?” you nod. “yeah, i know.. i know it, pretty.”

it’s not long after, you’re gushing on his fingers. back arching as you coat your inner thighs & his hand with your arousal. robb presses kisses to your belly as you catch your breath, hands coming to intertwine with his curls as he trails up your torso. little-

“‘m sorry.” & “forgive me? please?”

‘s are muttered between kisses, and you don’t have the heart to tell him you forgave him hours ago — before he even came back. he aligns his cock with your entrance, slowly pushing in as he wraps his hand around yours.

“didn’t mean anythin’ i said. not a word. i was- seven hells… i was so afraid.”

you’re so full. tears brim your waterline at his words, his hands, his cock — just robb. he thrusts, in & out, movements making you shutter as you’re hyper aware of everything. every touch, every slow drag of his hips. goosebumps trail along your body as you bite back a shudder, feeling utterly oh so good.

you ask him to kiss you, & he’s compliant to your every need, pressing his lips to yours. he’d fulfill your every request, go to the ends of the earth if you asked him to. what teasing he may normally shower you with is out of the window now, savoring every moment he has with you, as if you could vanish at any given point in time. watching you take that arrow reminded him of that. that you could.

he hits the right spot, over and over again, making you see stars. it’s not long before your grip on his hand tightens, walls clamping down on his cock as you cum. he follows suit, cumming with a groan that reverberates deep in his chest.

he cleans you with a damp washcloth, making sure your stitches didn’t tear either. you’re both laying on your sides, you facing his chest as his hand traces up and down your spine. the silence is comfortable.

“you forgive me?”

“i forgave you hours ago.”

your laughter echoes into the night.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜.・。.・゜✭・.

@cdragons @ghostinvenus (just lmk anytime u wanna stop being tagged!)

guys i went a little ham w this but oh well. posting smut on tumblr is soooo scary okay bye

[jeyneofpoole]

a little brother may live to a hundred, but he will always be a little brother

[fleurdeliet]

Two weeks of Theon: day 7 - Drowning

Tumblr.... Open for better quality

[ilynpilled]

im sorry but this fandom is so funny when they conflate and try to incorrectly contrast “redemption arcs” in this story. first of all the primary focus of most of these other characters isnt even taking a deep and complicated look at redemption specifically as a figure both within the text and out of it, and second of all they are often kinda incomparable with what approach they take and what they are actually exploring when touching on the subject