krabatdog

[krabatdog]

westerosi gentle parenting

[krabatdog]

can’t wait to see these results :)))

[krabatdog]

sometimes I forget that robb is like five years old when theon is taken to winterfell. can you imagine baby robb not really understanding theon’s status as a hostage and just wanting to be his friend. robb following theon around the castle and chattering nonstop and trying to get him to play. but ten year old theon is obviously super traumatized and doesn’t really understand why this small child is following him everywhere. so eventually he just kind of gives in because robb keeps nagging and he’s the only one who’s taken any actual interest in him and also he’s five, so theon is automatically cool in his eyes.

and don’t even get me started on the theon and jon beef. because I know that baby jon was pissed about robb finding another best friend. like the childhood drama must have been crazy.

[krabatdog]

i always click the "track package" button as soon as i get the email. "oh boy i wonder where my package is!" warehouse.

[krabatdog]

The Kraken's Daughter AFFC

A Ghost in Winterfell ADWD

The horror of turning into your mother.

[krabatdog]

you’ve been a prisoner of war since you were ten years old but the prodigal son is finally returning and this time you have a battle plan. you’ve been to war. you’re the trueborn son of a lord and your only living sibling is your older sister (notably a woman), so there’s no threat to your succession. basically? you have this lord of the seven kingdoms shit in the bag. there’s a red comet in the sky and that comet is YOU, baby! got your nice doublet on and everything. everything’s coming up theon everything’s coming up greyjoy this time for me. Unfortunately your dad is immediately pissed at you he says theon you look gay as fuck. theon i bet that necklace wasn’t even looted. theon did NED STARK turn you GAY during your CAREFREE YEARS LIVING IT UP AS A CHILD PRISONER OF WAR. Like omg i JUST got here. and to make matters worse while you were away everybody became a feminist so you aren’t even heir to pyke anymore you’re just somebody’s flop gay son. you’re just somebody’s flop gay son on a rock in the ocean foreverrr

[krabatdog]

Even though I think it would be a missed opportunity, I’m actually okay with the idea of Stannis beheading Theon at the beginning of TWOW. I mean it’s what Theon explicitly prayed for - a sword, to die as Theon. Let that boy get what he wants for once in his life. 

But also I think it’s funny for the effect it would have on Stannis, once it comes out Bran and Rickon are still alive. Imo the idea of killing a man for the wrong crime would really get under Stannis’s skin. Pretty much everyone else in ASOIAF would be like, “he was still a turncloak, he still killed other people, who gaf?” The answer is Stannis. Stannis gaf. It would needle him. He’d grind his teeth over it. I mean more so than he already does. 

[krabatdog]

thinking about how varied and interesting and different each unique perspective of asoiaf is and then you get to a sansa or (later on) theon chapter and get to read like twenty pages of the main character suffering more than jesus for no reason. and not that i don’t think that can be interesting it’s just funny to me for some reason.

[krabatdog]

modern asoiaf jon snow and theon greyjoy simultaneously listening to girl, so confusing (jon listening on his black chunky noise cancelling bluetooth autism headphones in his room with the door locked and the curtains drawn, and theon down the hall in robb’s room listening to it on asha’s old ipod touch through a pair of robb’s old pink wired earphones from flying tiger in which only one speaker will play music and you have to press the earphones into the port constantly like a dead man’s switch for it to work), both thinking “this song is so me and theon / this song is so me and jon” and going to text eachother about it and then getting so repulsed by the idea of texting that to their opp they put their phones back down and are slightly more mean that usual to eachother when the all go down for dinner (ned’s cooking white people beef curry and it’s really bland but lowkey kind of good in a yum dot com sort of way)

[krabatdog]

re prev post....... I love love love the idea of Theon, Prophet of the Old Gods, for so many reasons. I think it works so well thematically, character development-wise, plot-wise. But certainly one of the reasons is the image of Stannis Baratheon being flanked by his two pet prophets: one an old woman who looks young, the other a young man who looks old; Mel having dedicated her life to serving R'hllor, being ironclad in her faith and her purpose, while Theon continues to insist "look, they're not even MY gods, I don't know why they're speaking to me, I don't know why any of this is happening."

[krabatdog]

[krabatdog]

[krabatdog]

Who that man

[krabatdog]

acne + scratch marks

[krabatdog]

prince of fools

[krabatdog]

the greyjoys aren’t even weird that’s just what having a lot of uncles does to you. they keep disappearing the loadbearing ones too like aeron’s hardly even a warm body at this point it’s just hp euroncraft and victarion the wise toting around various limbless anime girl fetish torsos summoning monsters from the fathoms below or whatever. asha was fine because she had rodrik the baller to queen out with but theon had to be his own uncle and we all saw how that worked out also urri croaked at the tender age of teenager so he never got to grow into his unclehood SAD! well there are other uncles. soooooooo many uncles. and they call them nuncles also so like that’s an entirely new layer to the complex uncle ecosystem they’re cultivating over there. taking out balon was like a trophic cascade it’s fucking battle royale

[krabatdog]