#and then stede and ed running an inn

[soupbitch-moneybitch]

anyway when's season 3?

[bizarrelittlemew]

calling it right now that season 3 starts like this

[fuckwhoeverpickedallthefunnyurls]

Any fanfictions out there where Ed and Stede DO actually open the inn but Izzy survived so he's just kind of their mascot

[mermaidlighthouse]

At the local market

Stede wanders over to the fishmonger: is there anything you have that I could use to make a simple dish? I’m not the bes..

Fishmonger: SIMPLE?!?!?!?!

Ed: Pop pop he didn’t mean it *starts pulling a confused Stede away*

Pop pop: YOU?!?!

Stede: 🤨 Pop…pop??????????

Ed: ☹️ shut up and run

[ohmyglobwhatthefrickamievendoing]

i feel like customer service is the worst job you could get into if your previous job requirements included maiming😭

[hootgrowlhootgrowl]

I want season 3 to be two separate plots, one is the crew having their action adventure, and the other is just stede and ed figuring out how to run the inn sitcom style (bc jenkins said they would be horrible at it). The plots are completely unrelated until the very end when the bad guy ends up staying at the inn and the crew tracks him down and they all work together to take out the bad guy

[alexpression]

Okay, but imagine...you're a weary traveler and you stumble upon this tiny inn on a remote island only to walk in and be happily greeted by the notorious pirate Blackbeard.

[jakes-bootyass]

Just my gotdang luck that I get completely, brain-rottingly, all-in obsessed with ofmd just in time for it to be canceled

[lesbiancocksucker]

wish these gays would actually talk to their boyfriends before doing something insane

[blackflcgs]

@ssbonnet

He wakes up because he can't breathe. For a terrifying moment Ed thinks he's choking, and he doesn't know where he is, but then the breath shudders out of him in a painful hiccup.

It's when he feels the tears on his face that it clicks he's been woken up by his own crying. Right. Their 'inn'. Edward's in bed. It's dark. He's sure the presence he can sense behind him is Stede. He doesn't remember ever laying down to sleep.

Izzy. The sobs come in earnest. Proper bone-deep sobbing that hurts his chest, makes his body shake. All he fucking wants to do is roll over. Just roll over. Cling to Stede and try not to drown in this, but it's too much, he doesn't have the energy to just fucking roll over. He can't move.

[lilopossum-9]

So on one level I agree they are going to be terrible and I can't wait to see it. But on another, I really think Stede was born to work in hospitality and interior design, and Ed has all the creativity and strategy to be an entrepreneur!

Though they will lack Izzy to ground them and keep them focused and actually get stuff done 😢

(Gif by @kiwistede 💜)

Obsessed that DJ is like "oh no yeah they're going to be so bad at their new job". Like I love these cringe fail 18th century small business owners.

[piratecaptainscaptainpirates]

Okay yes Ed and Stede are going to be objectively very terrible at running an inn. Just the worst anyone has ever been at it probably. But can you imagine what it would be like to stay at this place.

There's literally a grave right there in the front yard.

Ed and Stede both have a very intense "compliment my boyfriend or I'll blow this whole place up" energy. Ed glares at you until you compliment the interior decor. Stede makes very unsubtle hints for you to rave about how good Ed's cooking is.

Towel service is fucking immaculate. And Ed probably keeps rooms stocked with all the good soap.

You can't sleep because those two are going at it all night long. You probably assume they're having some weird orgy because they're really into cringefail roleplay sex and you hear several different names as they try to find a good plot. You hear a cat bell ringing but they definitely don't have a cat.

Ed offers to take you fishing with him but spends the entire morning waxing poetic about his boyfriend while you do all the actual fishing.

It takes half an hour to get to your room because they just keep doing bits and talking about all the knickknacks they've got.

They're just absolutely embarrassing. No customer service is being done because Ed is too busy sitting in Stede's lap.

Continental breakfast is like. Just a whole fish and marmalade set out on a table. You have to eat it anyway because Stede's face makes it very clear you're not leaving that inn until you do.

[soupbitch-moneybitch]

god i love how good a grasp djenkins and the writers and actors and everyone have on the characters. it would have been SO easy to make a stupid "blackbeard is jealous of the gentleman pirate's newfound fame" plotline, but they understand ed and his motivations perfectly. he is genuinely delighted at the little restaurant cafe thing when those people fawn over stede and don't even realize who he is. and for a while he's genuinely happy that stede is getting recognition. the only reason he starts to turn sour on it is when he begins to realize he and stede have conflicting views on staying in piracy; that stede is at the height of his fame and ed still wants retirement, and how is that supposed to work out? he's not jealous, he's scared, because he finally got stede back and they slept together and everything is roses, but there's this big, looming roadblock in their relationship that he can't see around, and that's why he panics and runs. he couldn't care less about his legacy, he just wants to be a "normal guy" and run an inn with his husband on some island away from all his trauma, and he can't do that if stede is the Infamous Gentleman Pirate. it all ties back to their beats from the very beginning

idk man, historical accuracy and like, physics might not be djenkins strong suit, but he more than makes up for it in character continuity. i am feasting and also sobbing

[blakbonnet]

while you're misusing bury your gays, Ed is getting woken up by Stede kissing him lovingly and looking into his eyes and telling him he's the most lovable person in the world on the planet in the entire universe, and Ed is making him blush first thing in the morning, and they're badly running an inn together and pda'ing all over the falling columns of their shaky shack, and overcharging customers for salmonella stricken fish, and they're deliriously happy, by the fucking way

[lilopossum-9]

YES THIS. They are so black and white - either all in and running off to China or never seeing each other again; either a 'man' (killer) or weak; Stede is either Ed's pet or his Captain; Ed is either a fisherman or a pirate. Where's the middle ground?!

we were moving so fast...

[edandstede]

rip to anyone thinking the show has nothing left to give like did you not listen to djenks when he said he has a 3 series arc in mind, did you not see ed gazing at stede during lucius and pete’s wedding because that man wants to put a ring on it so bad, were you not there when zheng very loudly said she wants to find ricky and kill him for what he did, do you think they can just slaughter a dozen british and escape by the skin of their teeth and that be the end of it? there is still a giant fucking looming threat to the pirates and it will absolutely extend to ed and stede’s ramshackle inn whether they think they’ve truly retired or not (not to mention the new conflicts they’ll face trying to get this new venture up and running, that will be a sitcom in of itself). anyway revenge is still on the water and i don’t just mean the ship and i cannot wait to see how it all goes down. praying we actually get to.