#and then in the mornings i just do water. yk... i only use the actual wash at night. but idkkkkk
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nomairuins · 16 days ago
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also im so sick of the acne like its so annoying and its such bullshit bc im not on t anymoreee i havent been for months so can we wrap it up I know my hormones r all over the place bc i was on and off t so willynilly for a while but now i have been off t for like. literally a year atp i think. so we should be settled and that means acne you may leave
#i didnt even have acne during my like. first puberty. granted i started t when i was 16 (january 28th 2021 if you were curiousssss.#it was such a niiiiiiice dayyyyy and i had on my favorite skirt and i was so happy abt starting t and then my granny suddenly died. which#obv sad but like tactically it was very helpful on her part bc now ill always remember the day i started t.#but ya. and then i was on and off it A TON mainly for like. insurance reasons and then like me being shitty at taking medication#consistently. iam happy with the changes but i also feel like i like. well yk i wanna go back on it eventually. but i have had some changes#my voice is def deeper than it would be i have my shitty tstache i think my face looks more masc Mostly bc everybody spontaneously started#telling me i look like my dad. and other changes but were in polite company. so im not going to talk about my penis. KJBFSIUBFEJB but ya.#but the fucking acne likee. i didnt have any during my first puberty aside from like. id occasionally get ONE smack dab between my eyebrows#or on the tip of my nose. very rarely id get both at the same time#but now my cheeks r like the fucking mountains. and i donot like ittt bc idk why. ik acne is genetic and theres nothing bad abt having acne#i jsut dont understand why i do and i am insecure abt it . i apologize .#idk. maybe my facewash is actually hurting bc recently my nose hass been feeling a bit dry after using it#i also dont shower enough. ik acne is genetic and not a cleanliness thing necessarily but i do need to shower more thats just a thing abt m#doing a silly little jig I struggle with hygiene bc im mentally ill. you know. basically IDKKK#i only wash my face once a day (on good days . when i do my morning and night routines)#and then in the mornings i just do water. yk... i only use the actual wash at night. but idkkkkk#+ i probably do have acne scars. i cant tell bc of The acne but i am The picker .. sigh . its ok. im working on achieving neutrality with#all of that so my tactic is to be like I will have acne scars bc i picked at my face. and i try not to attach anything else to that#statement i just try to be like well this because that. and im working on that for everything like. yk. I always get weird abt talking abt#it esp nowadays bc my brain gets mad at me for 'failing' it (tbc its a good thing i failed it) but yk. it helps with the that stuff ...
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lalalian · 2 months ago
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things you have to script if you're shifting to my aethergarde academy dr
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date: september 14, 2024
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aethergarde academy = my dragon rider academy dr
i may update this, if I do I'll let you know in this little boxed off section!
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things you should script
"I do not ever get motion sick, especially when I ride dragons."
I scripted this even though I can ride rollercoasters just fine, but yk dragons don't fly around like a plane, do they? I imagine that many dragons would absolutely mess you up when you fly with them for the first time just to fuck with you out of excitement.
"I never fall into the ocean. Nothing can drag me into the ocean, especially on dragonback."
definitely not for plot reasons................... just know you're supposed to travel around in secret. I hate the ocean honestly (let's ignore that I'm making a mermaid kingdom dr), but don't think that the only things that live in the ocean in this DR are little baby axolotls and rainbow fish.
"my bangs don't mess up my vision or bother me while fighting."
actually I did have a rule in aethergarde's handbook (not finished with it yet, sorry yall) that specifically says that you cannot have a haircut that messes with your fighting ability, but like... bangs are so cute...
"the appearance of monsters do not scare me."
uh so idk if you're a pussy, but I do know I am, so
"proper plumbing exists, drinking water is clean and sanitary; there are significant studies in childbirth, because of this, mothers typically do not die from childbirth and childbirth isn’t painful due to proper birthing practices and tonics that alleviate pain."
I watched house of dragons. No mom should ever be cut open without some sort of anesthesia to give birth to a baby.
"dragon riders get discounts, the higher the ranking, the better the discount."
bc yes.
“I can read cursive handwriting.”
You will have to constantly write in cursive too btw. Maybe I should do a handwriting claim post…
“my keystone never malfunctions."
Keystones are basically your school ID; you use it to get in and out of Aethergarde, get discounts outside of Aethergarde, check in and out of your dorm, check out books from Aethergarde's personal library, and honestly it's a status symbol. You absolutely do not want your keystone to malfunction!
“I never get sunburnt."
You can either script this or always carry a sun protectant charm! Poor Miaene, flying really does a number on your skin so do make sure (or just script it) your skin stays healthy.
"If I can't get into my leathers, I can fight well no matter what clothes I'm wearing."
Leathers = clothes you wear in any class that requires you to fight. I'll cover this topic in my post about protective wear!
"I never smell like horse shit or dragon shit."
Just in case, yk.
"my dragon practices proper bathroom practices, this includes shitting/pissing in the proper places and not on me or my stuff; my dragon never smells like shit; my dragon's asshole is never caked in shit."
speaking of which... how would a dragon clean their ass... I'm just going to assume they always shit cleanly like dogs. EW IMAGINE HOW BIG THEIR SHITS WOULD BE. Actually don't do that. I had to include 'my dragon doesn't poop/pee on my stuff or me' bc my dog... likes to do that. okay well he doesn't necessarily pee on my stuff, but he used to have this thing where he'd pee on things he was frustrated with, which ALWAYS entailed a gate. Since he's a big boy now, he doesn't do that anymore, but yall don't fucking coddle puppies 24/7 like I did... I literally had to wake up every morning or get up in the middle of the night to mop/clean up dog piss.
"I will pass my glyph classes."
I'm already melting at the thought of glyph class.
"my dragon or other dragons don't try to destroy the school."
Just in case yall. Just in case.
"I never get shat on."
Dragons aren't supposed to shit mid air unless they're over an ocean, but yk just in case. Yes there are strict laws against this practice, and if your dragon is found doing this, you will have to pay a hefty fine + your flying license will be restricted for a certain period of time.
"dragons generally don't smell like shit like horses do."
Sorry, there's a lot of stuff about poop. Poop is gross okay..
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wanna know more about my aethergarde academy dr? here's a masterlist with everything I've posted about it!
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applesontheground · 1 year ago
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could you write a nsfw piece with patrick bateman and a timid fem reader who’s started working at the office with him, which he doesn’t like because yk, misogyny. so, he invites her over and he’s degrading her and just being cruel under the guise of just hooking up but she surprisingly likes it. thank you!
i could absolutely do this, anon! (forgive me for the misogyny, though, lol!)
lion's den 💼
NSFW | Word Count: 1,931 | Patrick Bateman x Female Reader contains DUBCON/unwanted touching, very casual workplace misogyny/sexual harrassment, mentions of drug use, degradation 🎼: x
Even after tenure had weathered you well into your position in the workplace, there was still a subtle hostility every time you sat in the line of mostly single, mostly lawless men. It honestly fascinated you to see such clean-cut faces never progress past what you might have seen on a college campus, to do the things they did outside of work – but you kept that to yourself.
Like you didn’t do a line in those club bathrooms every so often.
Any threat posed by you wouldn’t be taken kindly to. It was as though an elephant had stampeded through the room as you sat yourself at the conference table, a small portfolio splayed in front of you. The presence was loud enough, the mere appearance that you were the only woman there, and that there was no need for a throat clear or even an adjustment in your chair that would break such fragile silence.
This only became worse when you were directed to lead the conference, your branch at Pierce and Pierce being the one under question, and so early in the morning on top of it. Just one good thing for you after another. Your voice began to take control. Rather, set on top of the surface of the room as all your male coworkers acted like it was holding any actual water. Everything was so fabricated you were close to tearing your own hair out should you be left alone.
“Any questions?” You asked towards the end of the display you had put on, oblivious to what was about to happen as you closed the portfolio. “[Y/N], I’m sure you get this question a lot,” You glanced up, interested at first until you heard a snicker from the other side of the conference table. You held your breath, gaze frozen to your coworker Turner as he went on, “But you know, you could leave us to do this sort of planning.”
Your throat tightened, a confused smile crawling over your expression as you lied, “I’m sorry, but I don’t-“
“Boys. He means us as in men, sweetheart.” The snickering voice finally broke into his abrasive tone, and the table couldn’t help but laugh along. You smirked, the fake chuckle in your mouth drier than you had meant it as you clasped your hands together, a quiet murmur above the voices, “Yes, I am aware. Not now, though, but maybe one day.”
“One of us could pick you off the vine,” Your teeth pressed together in their interlock, pressure building badly in your face as the smile became jagged. “Settle down, have some kids...”
“Turner, cut the shit. Not at the conference,” Another piped up, but he was leaning back in his chair; a posture he had worn the moment you had opened your mouth.
He watched this from afar, a few catches of the eye all he got from you as he took it in. Something was starting to cave underneath that smile, he figured, but the utter disdain he caught as you closed your mouth to run your tongue over your teeth. A sign of disgust, she’s hiding it well.
I wouldn’t tolerate blatant undermining from these men, he then concurred, more for a stroke at his own ego than any kudos to you. It was simply a power play, and he’d be lying to himself if he didn’t flat out admit it was delicious to watch. A dark tress of his own psyche asked the question, looking to the man who was leading the berating in harmless breaths. Why does Turner think that he has any sort of control over [Y/N]? Besides being a man, his performance at best runs alongside hers – let alone struggles to maintain even her average pace.
When he looked back over to you, pulling from the cyclone behind his glassy brown eyes, he then caught the stare that was quickly moving on, throwing itself to the window in a surprised flash of [y/e/c].
Was she staring at me? His mouth twitched from behind a curled hand, still doing his best to appear disinterested.
Why?
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Maybe you could understand why there was such heavy drug use outside these walls now. Standing in a secluded break area, away from the council of airheads and with your cup of coffee, you recalled you had a flask in your office. Would anyone notice the spiked coffee? You thought with a smirk, but then seeing a glance of yourself in the crystal clear pot you were setting back in its place on the maker, you stomped the moment’s happiness back down with a following thought.
They’d notice if it was you.
“Oh, Miss [L/N]? Are you busy?” You almost didn’t recognize the voice of Jean, one of the secretaries for the VPs. You didn’t know if she was Constance or Bateman’s girl, but she cleared that up rather quickly with an introduction, stepping into the room with a downturned smile that did nothing to hide the intimidation she was feeling. “Jean, Mr. Bateman’s secretary. Have we spoken before?” You outstretched your hand and replied quietly, “Don’t believe so. Knew you helped one of the Vices here, though.”
She nodded hurriedly and mentioned, “Mr. Bateman told me that you were great at the meeting today. He…” She faltered, and you turned away from the counter fully, mug in hand and eyebrows furrowing. It was something you once again saw coming from a mile away, but still left the poor secretary to spit it out. “He wanted me to find you so that he could ask if you’d stop in his office at around two today. Go over your plans for the upcoming…uh-“
“Transfer?” You finished for her and smiled along when she beamed and nodded to you, “Yes, that. The transfer.”
You nodded, only thinking for a moment before answering, “Tell him I’ll be there, but I have another quick meeting at four. It’s a tight fit but I’m sure he’ll understand.”
Seeing that smile on her face again as she nodded for the third time in five minutes, you then admitted to her, “I’ll be honest, it felt like he was the only one taking me serious during the stand-up this morning.” Jean hummed in agreement, and mentioned, “He takes the girls here very…coldly, I think. I-It’s better than being laughed at, I suppose.” She paused, and then pleaded, “Oh, don’t tell him I said that.”
You winked at her, “Of course not. It’s between us.”
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At two, you went down the hall with your portfolio (just as infamous as you were at this point). Jean gave you a meek smile to see you enter the small office that came before Bateman’s quarters, and before she had even got on the phone to tell him the door opened.
“[L/N],” He greeted, and you caught that he was overtly warm as he gestured inside. You wondered if this was going to be anything of substance, but still walked in with the same level of mock joy. “Bateman, glad to meet with you.”
The door closed behind you, and there was an almost serene silence as he walked over to his desk. A careful finger dragged on the page of his open planner, checking something while you merely stood there.
“You know, I think Turner had a point.” Your eyes grew cold, staring at him as he stood from his desk, eyes still on his planner as he closed it. He then stated in a plain voice, “You’re far too incompetent to be leading this transfer.” You scoffed and were about to mention something about tenure when he suddenly froze up and looked at you. It wasn’t a friendly workplace stare or the stifled contempt you had seen from coworkers before. It was irritating, downright callous as he seemed to already be looking past you. You couldn’t help but stand a little straighter as he then approached, still in a leisurely stroll.
He got uncomfortably close, and you almost pressed into his office door as he murmured, “I think that you take disrespect far too often to ever be taken seriously, [Y/N]. It’s embarrassing.”
For once, you received this sort of comment from a sharp voice that was a little more than a complicated strain of hot air. He meant that, something he wasn’t just regurgitating from his peers. It was honest, and it was making your face catch fire as you muttered, “I’ve earned my place here just as well as half the trust-fund children who bought their way here, Bateman.”
Part of you was downright terrified of losing your pristine mask, frowning as you gave his well-fit suit a glance up and down. He was doing the same, and the two of you met eyes at the same time. He then sighed, “Well, I don’t think it’s going to get you anywhere. Especially not here."
You dug your tongue into your cheek, and snapped back, “I don’t need to be anywhere else besides here.” A pause, and you quickly clarified, “In this office, doing these busywork transfers and inventory checks so you men can go on, do coke and fuck whoever you want in your free time.”
He took in a breath, facing you and not shy to start backing you into the door. It should’ve made you leave, but that same hollow reminder that HR wouldn’t do anything kept you glued to the door, trying to stand your ground even while downright petrified. You wondered if Jean had heard the door shift from your shoulders sliding up against it.
It shouldn’t have made you wet, either, but knowing he was speaking his mind – his cruel, lucid mind – was going straight to the part of you that desired that. You desired drugs, you desired distraction, but you desired something real more than any of it.
Suddenly, his hand slid up your thigh, and your mouth fell open to yelp but he silenced you with nearly boxing you against the door, feeling the heat kept between your legs even through the layers of fabric, the guise of professionalism. The shock melted into pleasure as he watched you crumble bit by bit, pressing harder against your sex just for good measure.
“Do you bring this on yourself because you like it?” He then asked, scrunching his nose, “That’s deplorable.”
“Please,” You huffed, “It's only because you've been the only man who means it.” His neck straightened, no longer ogling your body to see you smile at him in a wicked prick of the lips, “I hear it all the time from these goddamn parrots we work with. Turner heard it from Allen, Allen heard it from Constance…But that’s the first time a man has had the brain power to call me deplorable.”
His hand left your crotch, and he almost seemed taken back by the way you smiled. You then asked, “Are you telling human resources about this, or are you going to make a woman do it?”
He scoffed now, and reminded you, “They wouldn’t do anything.”
Grinning, you agreed, “I know.”
He was stunned again, watching you adjust your clothes from where he had haphazardly pushed them aside. “Let me know if you have any more concerns about the transfer, Mr. Bateman.” You plainly stated, turning the knob to his office door before excusing yourself.
You closed the door, and Jean and you both jumped when his fist pounded against the door. You stood with your back to the wood, and when you met the secretary's eyes, you merely smiled.
"That wasn't cold at all."
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leegemma · 11 months ago
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Hiii, I hope you're good :3
I had this idea today and I cannot think of a better person to write it than you
So
Are we all conscious Jeongin has said many times he doesn't like being tickled??? Yes
And ofc the members know it too
SO
I was thinking of a fic like Jeongin actually loves being tickled, but he can't just admit it and that's why he always says he hates it (cuz yk, that's way easier than admitting you like it)
SO ONE DAY
IdkhowI'msorry
The members discover Innie's little secret, and ofc they completely WRECK him
Also, can you use indications number 3, 7, 14 and 29????
I'm sorry if it's too much but I needed to request it
Thank youuuu, have a good day/night/orwhatever<3
Hi sweet anon! Thank you for your request, I'm always happy to write for my ultimate bias 😍🩷
Hope you like it!
Enjoy:)
3 - “aww, you’re blushing!”
7 - “say it!”
14 - “it’s too embarassing!”
29 - “someone told me your little secret…”
-------------------------------------------------------
It all started one morning with a very bored Hyunjin. The boys had 2 days off and they decided to all spend it together at the 3racha+ Hyunjin dorm.
They all slept there together the night before, each boy sharing their room with another from the opposite dorm: Lee know slept with Han in his room, Felix slept with changbin, Seungmin slept with Chan, and Jeongin slept with Hyunjin.
When Hyunjin woke up the following morning, he looked to his right to see the baby bread tiredly scrolling on his phone. Hyunjin smiled and cuddled into him. "Innie~~"
I.N groaned. "What, hyung?"
Hyunjin teasingly poked the younger's side. "What's with the attitude so early in the morning?!"
I.N jumped with a squeal. "Nohot that."
Hyunjin smirked, knowing exactly what was about to go down. "Not what?" He wiggled his fingers into I.N's neck sneakily.
"STAHAHAP!" I.N tried to push the older's hand away, bringing up his shoulder to protect his neck.
Hyunjin pinned the maknae's wrists using his one hand and immediately started scratching on his tummy. "No thanks."
After a few more seconds of loud laughter, hyunjin suddenly stopped. Letting innie's hands go and smiling at the younger in adoration, tilting his head when he noticed the confused look on the other's face. "What?"
I.N shook his head. "Nothing..."
"Tell me!" Hyunjin demanded with a laugh.
"No, it's just because... Well, like... you know? You usually just don't stop so quickly." I.N shrugged, looking somewhat... disappointed?
Hyunjin stared at the boy in shock. "You- you wanted me to keep going?"
"No!" I.N mumbled. "I- never mind. I hated every second of it."
Hyunjin tried his best not to jump on top of the younger and squish him to death. Instead, he just got out of the bed calmly and left the room. "I'm gonna get a glass of water, stay here."
Instead of getting a glass of water, hyunjin got the whole gang. Telling everyone what he's just discovered about their lovely youngest.
"That's so cute!" Felix cooed.
"I need to explore that" Seungmin said mischievously.
"I need to exploit that." Lee know threw in.
And so, the whole group walked back to Hyunjin's room, where the clueless Jeongin was still laying on the bed, going over what had happend over again in his head. When he saw the 7 heads popping in the room, he was only getting more confused. "Why are you all in here? Shouldn't we hang out in the living room instead?"
"We can... right after we finish here." Chan smirked.
"W-what do you mean?" Jeongin wasn't stupid, he understood what was happening. He just hoped he was only being paranoid.
“someone told me your little secret…” Seungmin sat on the bed and quickly spidered over I.N's arm. Causing the other to squeal and pull away.
"Hyung!" He called, his heart beating faster and faster.
Han jumped next to Seungmin on the bed and pulled Jeongin's leg, setting it in his lap jellyfishing his knee (you know what i mean 😔) "do you have something you want to tell us, innie?"
I.N shook his head desperately. "No, no I don't."
"Are you sure?~" Changbin climbed on the bed and pulled I.N arms over his head, sitting on his wrists.
"DOHOHONT!" I.N squirmed desperately.
"He's already laughing! We didn't even start!" Felix giggled.
And with that, each one of the boys sat next to a spot: Chan on the armpits, minho on the hips, changbin in charge of neck and ears, hyunjin and Han had the legs, felix with the feet and Seungmin at the tummy and ribs.
"Please don't!" I.N begged.
"All you have to do is admit you like getting tickled!" Hyunjin announced.
"*love" Lee know corrected him teasingly.
"N-no! That would be a lie!" I.N was starting to get exited, finally they're doing this. He thought.
"Uh huh." Han teased.
"well if he's not going to admit it we'll have to help him." Chan shrugged.
The other boys nodded along, all counting down together from five while their wiggling fingers got closer and closer to Jeongin's body.
Jeongin, who was freaking out at this point, scared for his faith, took one ast deep breath before arupting into laughter when the 70 fingers reached him. "I CANAN'T!!!!"
"You can do anything you set your mind to." Changbin playfully encouraged as he fluttered his fingers against the boy's neck.
"NOHOHOHOHO! PLEASEEEEE!" I.N tried to squirm away to no avail l.
The boys all stopped for a second when they saw their youngest getting tired, hyunjin spoke first: “say it!”
I.N whined. “it’s too embarassing!”
"So you admit that it's true? You like being tickled?" Han asked with a smile.
"*love" Lee know corrected once again.
I.N glared at Lee know for a second, then turned to look at the ceiling as he couldn't bear looking at the boys and wasn't physically able to look at the floor in his very complicated position. "But fine... I g-guess I admit it."
“aww, you’re blushing!” chan poked baby bread's cheek.
"Shut up..." I.N mumbled.
"You be careful with what you say." Felix warned with a well aimed poke to the youngest's lowest rib.
"HA!" I.N dramatically laughed and jumped away.
The boys all smiled and coo, deciding to let I.N go.
"We're glad you told us Innie." Hyunjin smiled as he stroked I.N's hair.
"Well you kind of forced me to. But... I'm also kinda glad I told you guys." Jenging admitted, cuddling close to Hyunjin and Han who were both at his sides.
"Don't worry, you'll get a lot more of this now that we know." Lee know smiled as he joined the cuddle puddle, tempting all the pther boys to join too. Leaving I.N surrounded with the overflowing love from his big brothers.
"We love you maknae!"
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lyrichi · 11 months ago
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I know that this account was suppose to turn into a shitpost headcannon account but y'all I fucking love chemistry so much I can't even
Like sometimes I wish that there were fics of MC in obey me verse just doing chemistry with Solomon
For one I'm down bad
And for 2 I LOVE CHEMISTRY 🥺
Like my fucking chem final is in a few hours and we get to make one paper of a cheet sheet
so I fucking crammed last night and did all of the imporntatnt chapter shit from my notes and the textbook
Back to om for a sec tho I'd totally write a fic abt MC just loving chem as much as I do but like idk the chem in devildom is dif for some reason so they have to relearn shit but also teach people human chem
Like bro I love chem sm 😭😭
I already have some ideas about what could be dif between the two realms;
The periodic table could be different because of exposure to different substances and elements, which in turn makes the organisation different
Like the transition metals are larger, the man-made elements don't exist, the F block is way smaller/larger because of the exposure to different substances,
Exposure to elements are higher - for example, exposure and access to elements like Argon and ones w higher atomic masses and such are easier to find and use in experiments
The safety protocols are WAY dif, like in chem classes they don't even have the fuckin lab safety thing doesn't exist (because they're fucking demons) so things are a lot more reckless
Labs tend to be -- bigger? Like more combustion and danger involved, rather than labs that'd be seen in high school chem classes (mixing Calcium Chloride and Magnesium Sulfate for example)
Yeah man idfk I just love chem
---
Ooh here are some little snippets 😍
Solomon and MC get paired together in a chem class with not very many instructions, only being told to make an explosion with the least amount of substances. So what do they do? Pour Lithium into water
At some point after MC decides to really live-in their room in the HoL (cause like really they're sleeping in the fucking hotel guest room) they receive some chemistry equipment from Solomon. One night they don't come down for dinner and one of the bros (you choose who) comes to see what's up and they just find MC hunched over their desk trying to organise substances without cross contaminating anything, which is very hard when most things come looking like cocaine
Alternatively, it's the middle of the day and they're doing some experiment involving having to force copper to oxidize, and somehow they make the air in their room extremely explosive (think that one scene in The Martian book) After realising this, they leave their room and sit outside their door while trying to air out their room. (Fan on high, windows open all the way, door open, etc) They get questioned, yadda yadda yadda, they get banned from doing experiments in the house
Fun one; they make elephant toothpaste for Luke after he asked about what they do
Super fun one; they pull a Nile Red and do some crazy shit like make paint thinner into soda and have one (or more) of the characters drink it and half way through them drinking it MC just goes "it's actually paint thinner"
MC correcting the shit out of a teacher in RAD and somehow ending up teaching the class. Then there's a video found online of MC teaching the class and they become the resident chemistry nerd and get paid to do other people's work (before Lucy shuts it down 🙄)
Yeah uh
I don't know man I wrote like half of this at like 7 in the morning before my chem final and my brain is still on chem
I'm on break now so I can do whatever I want now but yk
---
Oh yeah here are some clarification things for those who have no clue abt terminology 😭
Transition metals are the columns in the periodic table between column 2 and 13, it's the metals like silver, gold, copper, tungsten, etc
The F block is the elements shoved underneath the rest of the table that realistically start in column 2
More for curious people; mixing CaCl2 and MgS gives you a precipitate (solid) and liquid - more specifically MgCl2 and CaS (this is without balancing them)
Lithium explodes in water - don't listen to google when it says to wash it off your hands with water
Oxidizing copper will basically change its color and make it rust
You make elephant toothpaste by mixing dry yeast, warm water, dish soap, and 3% hydrogen peroxide
wooo ok
Yeah that's it idk I love chemistry it's so fun
<3333
aight
If anyone's interested in my chem cram sheet lmkkk <33333
drink your dihydrogen monoxide <3
Edit;
Here's my cram sheets for those who want it
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allaboutjeanboy · 3 days ago
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The Bullet
New Direction
chapter 2 🤞
BEEP
BEEP
BEEP
You jolted awake to the blaring sound of your alarm, groaning at the realization that you actually had to get up this early. After turning off the alarm, you rubbed your tired eyes and glanced at your phone. To your surprise, you saw you had been added to a group chat with the people you met last night, along with a few others who seemed like they might be Sasha's friends.
KUWTK😜
Twin🤞:
guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ik you guys already know but y/n's my childhood bestie and she's just moved here from Sina so i decided to add her
Connie :
she's awesome you guys need to meet her
Eren :
wtf are you guys doing texting this late
oh wait nvm
it's nice to meet you y/n
Twin🤞 :
she'll probably be sleeping she needs to get up early
yk she's a figure skater??? totally badass
Eren :
might see her at practice sometime tomorrow then
Historia :
Sasha did you tell her about this weekend?? i would love to put a face to her name
Connie :
ofc she's coming 🙄🙄
You scrolled through the messages for about a minute or so to see what they were saying. Mostly everyone was just introducing themselves so you decided to text them to then introduce yourself. If you were being honest, you were surprised they accepted you so quickly but then again they did mention that Sasha would mention you a lot with made your heart swell at how deeply Sasha cared for you.
KUWTK😜
y/n :
heyyy
it's nice meeting you guys as you know i'm y/n
sorry i reply earlier i was sleeping
You powered down your phone and set it aside so you could get ready for practice. It felt a bit silly, but you couldn't help feeling like a kid again, buzzing with excitement at the thought of heading to the ice rink. Even though you felt your nerves slowing creeping in, you chose to stay positive. After all, the only reason you were so drawn to Trost College was because of that very rink.
You reluctantly climbed out of your warm bed and headed to the blinds, only to be hit by a wave of cold air. It dawned on you that winter was creeping in, and you had completely forgotten about the dropping temperatures. As you pulled the blinds open, the bright sunlight flooded your room, causing you to blink as your eyes adjusted. After a moment, you made your way to the bathroom to do your morning skincare and brush your teeth.
Once you were finished in the bathroom, you quickly pulled your hair into a bun before deciding on your outfit for practice. You opted for your usual look: black leggings and a long-sleeve compression shirt. To keep warm on your walk to campus, you layered on a hoodie and a jacket, eager to explore more of the area. You grabbed your big duffel bag from the closet and started packing your essentials. Remembering the new skates Sasha had gifted you, you decided to toss them in as well. Sure, it might not be the best idea to break in new skates while meeting your coach, but you were too excited to care.
After about five more minutes, you were finally ready. You slung your duffel bag over your shoulder and headed out your bedroom and towards the door. Just as you reached it, you remembered you needed to fill up your water bottle before leaving. You quickly did that, grabbed your keys, and stepped out, locking the door behind you.
You stepped out of the elevator and made your way toward the main entrance. As you walked outside, a blast of icy air hit you, sending a shiver down your spine. Wincing at the sudden chill, you tried to push it aside and popped in your AirPods, hoping to distract yourself from the biting cold.
As you walked, a wave of excitement mixed with nervousness washed over you. With each step closer, everything felt more real, and that realization scared you. You weren't used to being in this unfamiliar place, and the thought of not knowing anyone made it even more daunting. But before your overthinking spiraled out of control, you took a deep breath, trying to swallow down the anxiousness building inside you. You reminded yourself that it was probably best to relax before meeting your new coach; after all, you wanted to make a great first impression.
Your steps slowed to a stop as you finally arrived at the ice rink, and you couldn't help but stare in awe at its beauty from the outside. You looked like a kid who had just been offered a mountain of sweets. Shaking off the moment of wonder, you quickly walked into the building and approached the front desk. To your right, a short man with black hair holding a clipboard seemed to notice you and made his way over. *Is this my new coach? damn he's small.* you thought to yourself.
He stood in front of you, extending his hand for a shake. "Hello, my name is Levi Ackerman, and I'll be your new coach." You shook his hand and replied politely, "I'm y/n, it's nice to meet you." He gestured for you to follow him, leading you toward the changing rooms. "Put your belongings in the changing room, then come to the side of the rink, and we'll get started," he said with a stern tone. He was a bit intimidating, so you quickly complied and stepped into the changing room.
Once inside, you set your bag down and peeled off your jacket and jumper. You unzipped your bag to reveal your brand-new skates, and you couldn't help but feel a twinge of guilt—especially since you had no idea how Sasha managed to afford them; they were ridiculously expensive. After lacing up your ice skates and putting on your guards, you walked out of the changing room and headed toward the side of the rink, ready to begin.
You were amazed just looking at how big the rink was, you knew it was big but it was even bigger in person. As you spotted Levi and started to walk towards him. He looks up and gives you a nod of approval. "Good, you're ready. I expect you to give it your all today. Remember, practice is where you build your skills, so don't hold back. Let's see what you've got." His tone is firm but there's a hint of encouragement in his voice. you complied since you wanted to get on his good side "Yes sir." With that you opened the side door to get onto the ice.
Once you step onto the ice, you take a deep breath, feeling the cool air rush past you. You glide forward, your skates slicing through the surface, and you focuses on her movements. At first, you practice some basic glides and turns to warm up, allowing herself to get comfortable. You needed to gain a bit more confidence before doing anything else, so you skated around the rink once then added more intricate footwork. You felt your nerves fade away quite quickly as you started moving around a bit more. Before long you started you add in spins to showcase more of your skills.
You kept an eye on Levi, looking for some feedback. As you finish your warm-up, Levi watches closely. After a few moments, he crosses his arms and nods slightly, then calls out, "Not bad. I can see you've put in some work. Your technique is solid, but there's room for improvement. Focus on your balance during those spins, and remember to keep your posture strong. Let's push you a bit harder today." His tone is both critical and encouraging, which made you more determined to impress him. "Yes sir."
With determination in your eyes, you glide to the center of the rink, feeling the adrenaline coursing through your veins. Quickly, you take a deep breath, your heart racing as you gather up speed. As you approach the jump, you focus on your technique, body poised and ready. You dig the edges of your skates into the ice, launching yourself into the air with a powerful push.
Your body rotates gracefully, spinning three times before you prepare to land. Time seems to slow as you complete the rotations. With precision, you spot your landing and extends your leg, landing smoothly on one skate, your arms raised in triumph as you balances perfectly. As you land the triple axel, Levi's expression shifts to one of serious approval. He nods firmly and says, "That was a strong attempt, y/n. Your technique was solid, and the landing was good. However, remember that consistency is key. We need to work on your confidence in the air and your control during the landing. Let's focus on refining those aspects in our next session." His tone is direct, but it felt nice for him to acknowledge your talent.
About three hours had flown by, and the clock now read 7 AM. Levi had reminded you that you needed to get off in about 30 minutes, so you were determined to make the most of the time left. Suddenly, you heard Levi call out, "Let's see your triple axel again! I want you to improve on it a little before you leave!" You nodded, feeling a surge of motivation as you picked up your pace on the ice. You circled the rink twice, gathering your focus, then took a deep breath.
With precision, you positioned your body, digging the tips of your skates into the ice. You pushed yourself upward, soaring into the air. For a brief moment, everything else faded away as you spun three times, feeling the exhilaration of the jump. As you prepared to land, you extended your legs, aiming for a smooth finish. The thrill of the moment filled you with a sense of accomplishment.
You suddenly heard a familiar voice call out, "Whoa, y/n! That was awesome!" Turning towards the sound, you spotted the entire hockey team standing nearby. Just my luck, you thought to yourself. Connie was the one shouting, which didn't surprise you, but then your gaze landed on Jean. You shot him a dirty look before gliding across the ice toward the door at the side of the rink. As you approached, a smile spread across your face. "Thanks, Con man," you said, feeling a mix of gratitude and annoyance.
As you stepped off the ice, Levi handed you your skating guards and introduced you to their coach. "Y/n, this is Erwin Smith, the boys' ice hockey coach." Erwin smiled warmly as you met his gaze, extending his hand for a shake. You quickly took his hand, introducing yourself while feeling a bit embarrassed under the scrutiny of everyone around you.
Erwin broke the silence with a genuine compliment, "Your skating skills are amazing; we haven't seen raw talent like that in a while." His impressed smile made your heart race. You could feel your cheeks warming as you replied, "Thank you, sir," grateful yet flustered by the attention and praise.
Connie came up to you and wrapped you in a tight hug, his hockey gear crunching around you. He then turned to the boys, throwing an arm around your shoulder. "Guys, this is y/n, Sasha's old friend—the one she added to the group chat." You smiled at everyone, catching Jean's sharp glare directed at you, but he stayed silent.
A boy with brown hair tied in a bun and piercing green eyes stepped forward, smiling as he introduced himself. "Hey, I'm Eren. It's good to meet you." He went on to introduce the others—Reiner, Bertolt, Porco, Colt, and Marco, who you had already met. You felt a mix of excitement and nervousness as you took in the friendly faces surrounding you, well expect Jean, he had a scowl on his face. What the hell was his problem? why was he so rude, you've not even done anything wrong.
Erwin then interrupted, "Sorry to cut in, but you boys better get on the ice and start practicing; we've got a game in a few weeks." As everyone began saying their goodbyes, Jean walked past but suddenly stopped in front of you, towering over you with an imposing presence. "Is that really how you skate? It looks more like you're trying to avoid falling than actually skating," he said with a stern tone. You scowled up at him, feeling anger surge through your veins. Who did he think he was to treat you like that? Instead of backing down, you decided to tease him, wanting to annoy him just as much as he annoyed you. "I know you're just jealous because you're insecure about your own abilities," you shot back playfully, looking up at him. You must have hit a nerve because the look he gave you was intense enough to turn anyone to stone. With a huff, Jean pushed past you, nudging your shoulder with his before striding away to join the others on the ice.
Levi then turned to you and sat you down to go over what you can improve on next time. After that you went back into the changing rooms and just sit down for a second, you were completely exhausted but if Levi gave you the chance, you'd probably still go back on the ice. Levi didn't actually seem all that bad, he's a good coach and he gives good advice.
Once you had recollected yourself, you opened your bag and checked your room to see you had a message from your sister, Sage. You had 3 siblings, 2 sisters and 1 brother. You've missed them a lot, especially your oldest sister, since she was the first to move out you've not really seen her as often. It can go months without seeing each other and it's drifted you a little but you both still try and contact each other whenever you get the chance to.
Your sister is your soul sister; being the second oldest, you've formed a deeper connection with her than with your other siblings. You just don't relate to your younger brother, Sebastian, or your sister, Charlotte, the way you do with Sage. When you're apart from her, it feels like a part of you is missing. Growing up, you two were practically inseparable—always attached at the hip. Sage is also best friends with Sasha, and the three of you used to hang out together all the time; you were never without Sage.
You smiled to yourself before opening her message.
Sage💞
Sage💞 :
Hey girl it's been a while don't u think???
we should go to the club together just us, what do you think?
y/n :
hey sis 🤞🤞🤞
i'd love to
Sage💞 :
alright i'll pick you up at 7 then
You felt a wave of happiness as you realized you were finally getting to spend time with your sister. One of the main reasons you were eager to go to Trost was because she had moved there to attend college for a few years before deciding to drop out and settle down with her boyfriend, well, fiancé. At just four years older than you, she seemed to have her life all figured out, and you couldn't help but feel a twinge of envy for her seemingly effortless life.
You placed your phone on the bench, eager to untie and remove your skates. Almost immediately, you regretted wearing new skates; your feet throbbed with discomfort, and you could already feel the beginnings of bruises forming. Well, the damage was done, and there was no point in dwelling on it now. Once you finally got your skates off, you decided to give your feet a much-needed five-minute break. You slipped on your hoodie and jacket, then put on your shoes, grateful for the relief as you settled in.
When you finally felt ready, you stepped out of the changing room and waved goodbye to Levi. He gave you a strange look, and you couldn't help but think it was because of the way you were walking—your sore feet definitely weren't making it easy to stride confidently.
You stepped outside into the chilly morning air and decided to treat yourself to a warm cup of hot chocolate since you always skipped breakfast. You figured you might as well grab some for Sasha and Mikasa too, even if Sasha was still snoozing away. The café was just a short walk away on campus, and since you had plenty of time to kill until 7, it seemed like the perfect plan.
You walk towards the café, feeling the brisk morning air wrap around you like a refreshing embrace. Each step crunches softly on the fallen leaves, and you can't help but smile at the peacefulness of the campus as it slowly stirs to life. The thought of a warm cup of hot chocolate fuels your anticipation, and with every stride, you feel a little lighter, almost eager to escape the chill and step into the inviting warmth that awaits you.
You stepped into the café, and the aroma enveloped you like a warm hug, making your mouth water with anticipation. The cozy little spot was delightfully small and surprisingly quiet, which worked in your favor—no long lines to contend with. As you approached the counter to place your order, a cheerful blonde girl greeted you with a bright smile. "Hello! What can I get for you?" she asked politely, and her kindness instantly made you smile back, even though you knew it was part of her job. "Three hot chocolates, please and thank you." She nodded and tapped the screen to enter your order. "That will be £4," she said, and you handed over the money, feeling a little rush of excitement as you waited for your drinks.
She glanced over at you before speaking, "What's your name, so I can give you the right cup?" You smiled and replied, "Y/N." Her face lit up as if she recognized you. "Oh my gosh! You're Y/N? I'm one of Sasha's good friends. My name's Historia, by the way." You couldn't help but smile back as you chatted with her while she prepared your drinks. She mentioned her girlfriend, Ymir, and reminded you about the gathering at her dorm—she must really want you to come. Once Historia finished making your drinks, she asked for your number to stay in touch. You didn't mind at all and gave it to her without hesitation. After that, you waved goodbye as you headed out, thinking she seemed really nice. Her girlfriend's one lucky girl!
Once you stepped back outside, you slipped your AirPods in, knowing that music always made the walk feel faster. With your favorite playlist playing, you started toward your dorm, the rhythm of the songs matching your pace and lifting your spirits.
As you walk back to your dorm room, the morning sun warms your face, and the air is crisp. In your hands, you cradle a steaming cup of hot chocolate, the rich aroma wrapping around you like a cozy blanket. Each sip feels like a reward for your hard work on the field, the sweetness melting away any lingering fatigue.
The campus is quiet, with only a few students milling about, but the peacefulness adds to the moment. You take in the vibrant fall colors of the trees lining the path, feeling grateful for the little things. With each step, you look forward to unwinding in the apartment, maybe a warm bath, all while savoring the warmth of your drink. The day ahead feels promising, and you can't help but smile as you approach your dorm, ready to embrace whatever comes next.
As you approach the dorm building, you step through the main entrance and are instantly enveloped by the warmth inside, soothing your tense muscles. You make your way to the elevator and press the button for the third floor. The doors close slowly, and you feel the gentle ascent, the elevator humming softly as it carries you upward before finally coming to a stop.
You stepped into the quiet hallway, making your way toward your dorm at the very end of the corridor. As you rummaged for your keys in your pocket, you finally unlocked the door. Mikasa looked up from her spot, her soft smile warming the room as you walked in. You set your things down and approached her. "Hey Mikasa, I brought hot chocolate for all of us on the way back," you said, placing the cups on the counter. "Thank you," She pulled you into a brief embrace, then picked up her cup and took a sip, a look of contentment crossing her face.
Before long, Sasha wandered into the kitchen, her eyes lighting up as she thanked you for the warm drink before nearly devouring it. You all settled in together, chatting for about ten minutes, when you suddenly remembered that Sage had invited you out. With a smile on your face, you said, "Oh yeah, my sister invited me out to a bar to catch up since we haven't seen each other in a while." Sasha turned her head toward you, her expression shifting as she began to share how much she missed Sage, and you couldn't help but laugh at her enthusiasm.
Sasha was close with all your siblings, but her bond with Sage was especially strong since the two of you were practically inseparable. After chatting with Mikasa and Sasha, you made your way to the bathroom, feeling an urgent need for a shower. You turned the water on, ensuring it was hot, grateful for the warmth after being out in the cold since 4 a.m.
You step into the bathroom and close the door behind you, the sound of the shower running filling the space. You adjust the water to your preferred temperature, letting the steam envelop you as you step under the cascade. The warm water washes away the chill from your skin, easing the tension in your muscles. You take a moment to enjoy the sensation, then reach for your favorite shampoo, lathering it into your hair before rinsing it out, then putting your conditioner in for about a minute before rinsing it off. Next, you grab the body wash, letting the fragrant suds cleanse away the day. After a few minutes of relaxation, you rinse off, feeling rejuvenated.
After stepping out of the shower, you grab a soft towel and wrap it around yourself, feeling the warmth still clinging to your skin. You move to the sink and start your skincare routine, applying a gentle cleanser followed by a hydrating toner, making sure to pat it into your skin. Next, you reach for your favorite moisturizer, smoothing it over your face and neck, enjoying the refreshing sensation. Once your skin feels nourished, you head to the vanity to apply body cream, focusing on areas that tend to dry out, leaving your skin feeling soft and supple. Finally, you grab your blow dryer and begin to dry your hair, carefully working through the strands until they're smooth and shiny, then you put your hair into roller to give a blowout effect.
You thought you should text your sister to ask what you were going to wear.
Sage💞
y/n :
hey what should I wear, just so i know xx
Sage💞 :
something fancyyyyy
i feel like dressing up tonight xx
y/n.:
sounds good
see you later xx
Feeling a bit bored, you decided to search for an outfit, knowing it could take a while to find the perfect look. You began rummaging through your closet and soon discovered a lovely long black skirt paired with a brown off-the-shoulder top. Instantly, you could envision how it would all come together. You grabbed a pair of brown heels and some gold jewelry to complete the ensemble. To your surprise, everything matched beautifully, turning out far better than you had anticipated given that it was a last-minute choice.
inspo:
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You settled into your vanity chair, the outfit neatly folded beside you. With plenty of time to spare, you decided to roll a joint, knowing it would help pass the time effortlessly. Let's be honest, it's the perfect way to unwind, especially since you were planning to take a nap before heading out. After being up since 4 a.m., you definitely needed it. You pulled everything you'd need out of your drawer and then settled down on your bed, ready to enjoy a little downtime.
After grinding the cannabis and creating a crutch with the filter tips, you began packing the rolling paper full of your cannabis. You filled it up, rolled it, and then used your tongue to seal it. After that, you twisted it and packed the open end. Now for the exciting part: you put it to your lips, lighted it, and watched for a while as you opened TikTok on your phone.
As 15 minutes passed, you started to feel the effects wash over you, a wave of relaxation that made your eyelids grow heavy. Eventually, the fatigue took over, and you drifted off into a light nap, surrendering to the moment.
The nap didn't last long before you were jolted awake by someone barging into your room. You blinked your sleepy eyes, struggling to adjust to the sudden intrusion. As you fully regained your senses, you realized it wasn't just one person—it was Sasha, Connie, and Jean. Mikasa must be off somewhere else since she wasn't with them. You groaned, annoyed at being disturbed, and shot them a scowl with your heavy-lidded red eyes. "What the hell are you guys doing?!" you snapped, irritation bubbling up. You hated being woken up by others. Sasha laughed and raised her hands in mock surrender, Connie following suit. Meanwhile, Jean just stood there, staring at you with an unreadable expression.
Sasha turned to you with a sarcastic glare, "Have you seriously been smoking with us?" You sat up in bed and nodded while stretching. Just then, Connie leaped onto your bed, followed by Sasha, who landed right on top of you. Annoyed, you smacked her hard on the backside. "Owww, what the hell was that for?" she exclaimed, rubbing her sore spot. You chuckled, "Because you woke me up AND jumped on top of me," crossing your arms in mock anger. Sasha and Connie burst into laughter, but Jean just stood there, which started to annoy you. You decided to call him out, "Are you just going to stand there all day, or are you going to actually sit on the bed with us, Jean?" He scoffed, shot you a look, and finally plopped down on the bed.
In order to roll his own joint, Connie leaned across the bed and grabbed all of your cannabis. "You're not even going to ask if you can have that?" you mockingly sneered at him. "You would have said yeah anyway," he remarked with a smile after looking up. You chose to keep quiet as you watched him roll for everyone after realising he was right.
You turned your attention to Sasha, "Sasha, take a look at my outfit and tell me what you think. I want another opinion." She turned around, her face lighting up into a smile as she nodded. "Looks gorgeous, babe, just like you." You beamed at her compliment, but then noticed Connie and Jean staring at you in shock. "What are you all staring at me for?" you asked, feeling confused. Jean finally broke the silence, glancing at you before speaking for both of them. "We didn't know you had a boyfriend." You tilted your head slightly, puzzled. "What are you talking about? I'm not getting a boyfriend anytime soon; I'm just meeting my sister."
Jean raised an eyebrow, clearly taken aback. "Oh, so you're saying you're not interested in anyone right now?" He crossed his arms and leaned back, as if trying to wrap his head around what you just revealed. "I thought you were done with dating for a while," he said, skepticism creeping into his voice. "Guess I totally misread the situation." Just then, Connie jumped in. "So what's your deal then? Are you focusing on yourself?" You paused for a moment, considering your response. The truth was, the only reason you had stepped back from dating was that every serious relationship ended with you getting cheated on. You figured honesty was the best policy; there was really no point in hiding the truth so you decided to tell them.
You shrugged your shoulders. "Well, in pretty much every relationship I've had, I ended up getting cheated on, so I've decided to take a break." Jean's expression softened just a bit, but his words still carried an edge. "Wow, I didn't realize it was that serious," he said, attempting to be sympathetic while rolling his eyes slightly. "Taking a break sounds smart, even if it does seem a bit dramatic. Just don't let it turn into a pity party, okay? You've got to get back out there eventually." You shot him a glare, rolling your eyes in response. "I can do what I want; it's my life and I also don't want your pity." He scoffed, which only made you roll your eyes even harder.
Sasha harshly slapped the back of Jean’s head for his snarky comments, causing you to giggle while he shot a glare your way. You didn't really care about his remarks; deep down, you knew he had a point. Maybe it was time to put yourself out there again.
"Can you two stop bickering for five minutes? Jesus Christ," Connie chimed in playfully. He had already rolled the joint and took a moment to light it, inhaling deeply three times before passing it to you. You took about five draws, savoring the moment, before passing it to Jean, then to Sasha, and around the circle until it was finally finished.
After your smoke break filled with bickering and laughter, you glanced at the clock and saw it was around 5:45 PM. Realizing it was time to get ready, you knew it would take you a while. Everyone else had already headed to the kitchen to whip up some food, and since you hadn't eaten yet today, you planned to sneak a bite of their meal before you left.
You sat down at your vanity as you carefully unroll your hair clips, allowing your hair to fall freely around your shoulders. As you reach for your makeup, you opt for a natural look, but with a twist—a smoky eye that adds depth to your gaze. With each brushstroke, you blend soft earth tones while deepening the outer corners, creating a sultry effect. The transformation feels empowering, and you can see the confident version of yourself emerging, or it could just be the fact you were still kind of stoned.
Once you finished your makeup, you glanced at your phone and saw it was already 6:30 PM. A rush of excitement surged through you as you quickly slipped into your outfit, adding the perfect touch with your jewelry and heels. With a deep breath, you opened your door, eager to see everyone's reactions to your look.
You sauntered down the hallway and into the kitchen, where Sasha spun around, her face lighting up with a huge smile. "Omg babe, you literally look gorgeous! Take me as your bride!" she exclaimed, making you laugh. Just then, you caught Jean glancing your way, his eyes roaming over you before he quickly looked away, realizing you'd seen him. You weren't about to let him off the hook, so you decided to poke a little fun. "Like what you see, Jeanie?" you teased, and he shot you a sharp glare. "Don't call me that," he replied with a stern tone, but you just smirked, knowing how much it annoyed him. That was exactly why you'd keep calling him that.
Connie suddenly appeared behind you, wrapping his arm around you with a warm smile. "You look amazing, y/n!" he said, making you turn around to grin at him. You planted a quick kiss on his cheek, replying, "Thanks, Connie baby." As you turned back to fully step into the kitchen, you couldn't resist taking a bite of Sasha's pizza, but she quickly slapped your hand away. "I've literally not eaten all day, please, Sasha," you pleaded, giving her your best puppy eyes. Your charm must've worked because she relented, offering you one more slice. You happily accepted it and devoured it in no time.
After about five minutes of chatting with everyone, also bickering with Jean, Sage texted you to say the taxi was outside, so you hurriedly grabbed your purse and said your goodbyes. As you walked toward the door, you felt a pair of eyes on you but chose to ignore it and kept moving. What you didn't realise was that it was actually Jean watching you as you left.
As you made your way down to the taxi, a wave of excitement washed over you, making your heart race. The thought of reuniting with your sister and the promise of a fun night ahead filled you with anticipation. You couldn't help but smile at the idea of all the laughter and memories waiting to unfold. It felt like this night was going to be something special, and you were ready to embrace every moment of it.
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causenessus · 3 months ago
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HI NESS!! its like 3 pm rn so good afternoon 😋 i hope you're having/had(? idk when ur school day ends so like..) a good school dayyayay :)) HOPEFULLY YOUVE BEEN DRINKING WATER and ofc eating enough + taking ur meds 🙂‍↕️
when u mentioned some npc named cream cheese i started laughing like an idiot omg 💔 like picture me sitting in the living room next to my roommate bc we're watching a tv show and then i look down at my phone and start giggling out of nowhere.. cream cheese sounded like a real opp 😕🙏 i was the same but with mariokart bc rose gold peach was always hitting me w red shells fr LIKE I CRIED OVER THAT A LOT ACTUALLY (i was 7). and omg mario party!! i still play that whenever i have game nights bc i was able to buy a nintendo switch HAHAHAH and dude just dance hyperfixation goes crazy bc i got insanely good at rasputin solely because i thought i looked cool (i did not.) 😞
ALSO THE VOLLEYBALL GIRLS BEING MEAN IS SO REAL OMG.. lots of the vb girls at my middle school didn't like me for no reason it was crazy actually and that was partially why i didnt start until now LMAO theyre scary af sometimes akwkwnssj
IM GOING BACK TO SCHOOL TOMORROW and me and my friends were trying to figure out where to meet and its now coming to me that i have nothing planned whatsoever 😋 LIKE I DIDNT EVEN PLAN WHEN TO WAKE UP AND I ONLY REALIZED NOW PLS so today i have to lock in and plan an outfit hairstyle and lunch for tomorrow morning and uhhhhhh i wanted to write and post an akaashi oneshot before i went back to school bc i would probably lose the time to write frequently so... how do u balance out your time omg (DONT ACTUALLY ANSWER THIS ITS OK ITS RHETORICAL IM JUST YAPPING)
also i had no idea but like theres a district rule here that phones CANNOT be used at all in the school day unless u were explicitly allowed to.. like ive been getting intro emails from my teachers and their talking about A CELL PHONE VAULT⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️ guys i just want my phone so that i can listen to music while i work on assignments please i swear im an ok kid 💔 i may just keep it in my backpack and always wear my hair down because im desperate.. i think i may have an aneurysm if i have to go the entirety of a day without music so desperate times call for desperate measures i suppose 😕
ANYWAY IM NOT GONNA REREAD THAT AND ATTEMPT TO CORRECT ANY ATROCIOUS LOOKING RUN ON SENTENCES SO I HOPE YOU CAN UNDERSTAND ME,, HOPEFULLY YOURE DOING WELL AND ARE HAVING A GOOD DAY!!
HELLO SAV!!! GOOD EVENING <3 (it's 10 pm rn oopsies) THANK U!! AND I HOPE YOU HAD A GOOD DAY <3 today was okay besides the embarrassment of hearing my own playlist being played in public...yk what i'm referring to..BUT also aa yes i will take my meds thank you for the reminder!! since 10 is when i'm supposed to take them 😭 i'll take them next time i get up!! bc i'm kind of comfy rn </3
PLEASE i never actually played mario kart </33 like then the switch came out and my friend had it and i played at her house but then she'd always get mad bc i'd beat her LMAO so i've actually never owned mario kart!! like i ended up get a hand me down switch from my sister's bf's sister who didn't want it anymore but it dies like within an hour of being used so i never play it </33 and DW i didn't look cool dancing to promiscuous even if i got 5 stars on it LMAOAO
but YES idk i think middle school volleyball is definitely the worst bc that's when the toxicity started for my friend in volleyball and i think it makes sense just because of what our minds are like at the state (trying to find ur place and form groups and everything yk </3 not to be a psych nerd or anything but ykwim </3)
AND AA BEST OF LUCK TOMORROW AT SCHOOL!! I'LL PROBABLY MESSAGE U AT MIDNIGHT TO WISH U LUCK AGAIN <3 I HOPE YOU GOT YOUR OUTFIT AND EVERYTHING PLANNED OUT!! i've also been just taking it day by day 😭 like my schedule depends on the day yk so like i've just been setting alarms the night before everytime my schedule changes (IDK HOW TO EXPLAIN IT BUT I GET U SAV I GET U) and aa!! i know your question was rhetorical but definitely don't stress about too much please <3 take your time and just do what you can manage!!
AND THAT'S CRAZY?? A PHONE VAULT??? MAN YOUR SCHOOL IS HARDCORE I'M SO SORRY 😭😭 i definitely just keep my hair down and use earbuds most of the time bc i CANNOT go without music and like it's fine!!! i have great grades tbh so no one has anything on me 😌 i remember one time i had this math final and we had to put our phones in like a shoe hanger everyday (idk what it's called) but thank goodness wireless headphones exist!! so like my phone would still be connected to my earbuds <3 and my teacher made me lift up a beanie i was wearing to cover my ears LMAO AND I HAD AN EARBUD IN BUT SHE DIDN'T SEE IT BC THEY'RE BLACK like i am not rich enough to afford airpods and i don't want them anyway 😭 they look uncomfortable and ugly and they draw so much attention bc they're bright!! offbrand earbuds all the way <3
YOU ARE BETTER THAN I AM FOR PROOFREADING YOUR MESSAGE 😭😭 I'M GOING TO SEND THIS AS IT IS AND I'M SORRY FOR ANY RUN ON SENTENCES!! I HOPE YOU HAD A LOVELY DAY SAV <33
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gabby-i-guess · 6 months ago
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ADHD PSA #3: Bath time 🛀
So I just moved into a new house, and for whatever reason, the gremlins living in my brain have decided that the new shower has ‼️BAD VIBES‼️ and therefore will only agree to let me have a shower when ABSOLUTELY NECESSARY. I've been trying to figure out ways to bribe them into liking the shower, so here are a few ways I've tried to make my shower ADHD accessible.
1) DIY waterproof phone holder
Yes I know I sound like an iPad kid, but if having an audiobook/music/YouTube video playing while I shower lets me shower, I'm ok with that.
All you do is take a sturdy ziplock bag, pop your phone and a large bull clip inside, and zip it up tight (give it a lil squeeze to make sure there are no gaps). Now you can clip the bag onto your shower caddy from the inside, or another ledge or something (get creative), and voila - your phone stays totally dry and you stay entertained. You can even somewhat use your phone through the plastic, so you can change songs etc. When you're done, unclip the unopened bag, take it to a dry place, and you can open it and take your phone out there.
Here's a photo for demo:
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2) Sort your shit out
Personally, I get super overwhelmed by all the steps in self-care tasks, including but not limited to showers. Routines like that involve like 10 steps that call on skills ADHDers really struggle with, like decisions, organisation, memory, executive functioning, and planning. So I've made things as simple as they can possibly be for me.
I have 4 little baskets in my cupboard for each of my regular routines:
morning (with makeup, sunscreen, moisturiser, and deoderant)
evening (with vitamin C serum, makeup wipes, pimple patches, and floss)
regular shower (with antibacterial soap, shampoo, conditioner, leave in conditioner, and a hair brush)
and ✨fancy shower✨ (with a razor, shaving cream, nice smelling soap, body moisturiser, curl cream, and a candle)
Now I can just yank out whatever basket I want and use whatever is in it on autopilot. Then, when I'm done, I can dump it all back into the basket and shove it all back into the cupboard. This method reduces how overwhelmed I get by so goddamn much that my fucking dentist commented on the noticeable improvement in my teeth, because I had actually consistently had the energy to floss. And when you're consistently flossing - well, it's only up from here baby 😎
3) DIY bath
The sensory experience of showering can be truly horrendous. And while I can't fix a lot of it, I can at least make it a little less... much. Yk?
So here's my solution:
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Yup.
I got myself a blow up pool.
For my shower.
I am officially the coolest person alive.
This baby was $10 at Kmart, and is 80cm wide and 18cm deep - basically, cross your legs and it will not quite cover your thighs. To provide a little more insulation and some padding, I also popped an old towel under the pool. It's really not much, but it means I can sit down in comfortably warm water and splish-splosh myself clean. As opposed to showering, which (especially in a large bathroom/shower like I have now) is alternately way too cold and way too hot, way too loud, way too (I literally don't know how else to say it) "fast", way too out of control (so much splashing and water going everywhere, UGH), and just kinda generally way too much.
A bonus perk: I can finally use some nice pink bubble bath bombs from last Christmas 🥰🥰
I really hope one of these tips helps one of you out there. Keeping yourself clean is one of those "basics" that neurotypical/mentally well people don't realise is actually really hard.
You are doing a truly awesome job, and I'm truly, truly proud of you. Sending you love and warm, clean, sudsy thoughts ❤️
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achilleslefttoe · 10 months ago
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The Gods.
hihihihihihi, so basically this is mostly for @star-realities but im making it public cause yes. hope this is helpful so basically, im writing a book series, and my big idea was to make design gods for the world inspired by me and the friends i created the world for. there've been multiple versions of this series but the very first was based on me and 3 of my friends. I found it fitting to make us the gods of the world because if it weren't for us, the book nor the world it takes place in would exist.
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so these are us, i made the photos on picrew (@/hunbloom). but anyways here's the actual lore. basically Achaii woke up one day bored as hell and said "damn, this thing we live in is bland as hell. imma spice it up" and grabbed their paintbrush and made the sky. Legends say they still paint the sky every night and morning.
Evanitis saw this and joined in making greenery. The two enjoyed their freedom and the other two watched. Zacharaea and Maion never really liked each other but they both loved Ace and Evan. Then Zach wanted to join in, so he and Evan made fire by accident. Zach, overwhelmed by pride cried, and Ace stepped in to make the oceans and rivers to store the tears of Zach and later on the others. The tear thing is important later. Mae blew the fire out to keep it from spreading, they all knew the power that their creations had.
After Mae had blown out the fire, the earth parted. Evan fixed it to be somewhat uniform afterward. (goodbye Pangea) They called their island Te Etearia Isle, later changed to The Ethereal Isles. Located off the southern coast of France.
After this, Evan created an herb he was fond of and decided to burn it, after he burnt it, he began creating whatever the fuck he wanted (yes, i'm implying he made weed)
One night the deities came together to create the first humans. They loved each other in VARIOUS different ways but it got lonely when it was just the 4 of them. Mae worked out the fine tuning of humans. Two arms, two legs, two lungs, a head, brain, and heart. Of course and so on. Each one of their first humans had their own special features but i haven't worked them all out yet.
Anyways, back to the tears thing. In my story, on their side (there's their realm and our side aka the boring non magic side) there are four bodies of water that are considered Tears of a God, which is written in Latin but I don't have a perfect translation for it yet. These bodies of water have special properties that vary depending on which god cried into them. They're all salt water cause yk, they're tears.
I have one for everyone but Evan, the only thing I know about his is that it's like The Yellow River in China, it's rough and prone to flooding for a very specific reason. But that reason is written in my history notebook that i left in my locker at school.
Ace's (well mine) is called Mourner's Peak, where there's multiple little ponds (or maybe geysers idk yet) each one evokes a different emotion. Mostly negative, but some positive.
Zach's is the original pond Ace had made for him to cry into when they made fire for the first time. That is the main portal, his tears make it possible to travel from each realm easily.
Mae's in a deep deep saltwater pond, under it is the cave where she locked away the other three gods. They're stuck under there for thousands of years.
also, the star over bethlehem where people say jesus was born is where the big fight between Mae and the others happened. The star was Ace fighting cause yk they're the deity of the cosmos and celestial magic. Also toying with the idea I wrote the bible as a joke and someone found it after we locked away and then continued it lmao.
anyways, that's it for now. if anyone has questions or wants me to go into more detail on anything, I will gladly do so. Also if you wanna hear more about my series in general, i will gladly ramble about it
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fiaampiree · 1 year ago
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SUMMER GLOW UP
—Welcome back ! Or welcome
Howdy my dear gems ! It’s me fiaanii and here I’m gonna break down the SECRET OF ULTIMATE GLOW UP !!
So… let’s go
We will divide this into 2 parts
PHYSICAL GLOW UP
MENTAL GLOWUP
Let’s first define what glowup actually means ¿!
Glow up :: a significant transformation, typically in physical appearance, that is perceived as an improvement. It's the process of turning yourself into a better version of yourself and becoming more confident, attractive, and successful.
And first we will start with PHYSICAL GLOW UP as I believe that if you feel good physically then it can make you feel good and beautiful mentally
Note : you’re beautiful the way you are this is just to enhance your beauty
physical glow up
Know your body & yourself ::
Knowing your face features and working on them accordingly can make a big change in your appearance! And it will enhance your own beauty—! And ISTG @dear peachie is a the best YouTube channel I can suggest you when it comes to know about yourself more ! Their channel can help you recognise your face shape your face type and also help you with finding your make up syle and over all appearance !
Clear skin ::
yup ! This is in the list as well like come on who doesn’t want a clear skin ¿ and I will tell you my own routine and also the tips
1. Get to know your skin type [ mine is dry skin ]
Well get your face wash and stuff according to your skin type and I’m telling you this because I myself choose the wrong face wash and I kinda regret it ! Coz it messed up my face and now I’m dealing with pimples
2. Now as you got to know your skin buy the product accordingly
Now have a routine I will tell you mine
First I was my face with a korean foam face wash but before washing my face I like to massage my face with coconut oil and gua sha then I use rose water as a toner and spray in on my face [ it helped me with pimples] also while washing my face I usually use cold water since my skin doesn’t like hot or warm water !
Then I use my moisturiser and I use baby cream as a moisturiser! Then I just use my sunscreen I use it from lakmé and yeah ! That’s it
Workout ::
Well workout as it has many benefits not only to be in shape I mean yeah it’s also a priority but also to feel good about your body and be more confident within yourself!
Vibe & aura ::
Create your own vibe and aura that you like ! Be yourself and don’t care what others think just don’t give a fuck be who you want ! Do what you want—! No one gets to tell you what to do ! Also YK creating a playlist to make you feel that way helps alot ! And I literally listen to the songs and playlist to have that kinda vibe which I want
HAIR ::
I use rice water for my hair ! It’s quite simple to use just soak rice in water the day before you have to wash your hair and then when you have to wash it ! Just rinse you hair with rice for like an hour then just wash it like you usually do ! I do it and it helped me alot !
Also for hair style I will recommend @dear peachie as they show you which hairstyle is best for your face shape as my face shape is diamond so I just go with Wonyoung’s hairstyle as they suit me the best and rosé’s hairstyle aswell
At night time ::
At night time I like to just wash my face without the face wash and then I like to moisturise it with the cream and yeah ! That’s it
Lips ::
Many ppl don’t mention the lip part but yeah ! I love to scrub my lips using my own DIY lip scrub coz I’m born at in a strict family and they won’t buy me a lip scrub so I decided to DIY it so… take sugar , honey and coconut oil mix them together and that’s it and then after I’m done I like to ise vasline for my lips !
Beauty hacks ::
Use coconut oil for long lashes or thick eye brow
Keep two spoons in fridge then take them in the morning and massage with them under your eyes for de-puffing your face
Do face yoga to get slimer and defined face
Mental glow up
Once you have a really good and powerful mindset no one can stop you from being your best self
Be your own therapist ::
Now take a diary rant on it , write your emotions, explain your day your problem and just imagine it as your best friend who won’t judge you and help you to feel better! When I tell you that paper had more patience than real people I’m telling you the fact ! Being your own therapist can help you be yourself better and just clear up your mind once you share everything with your diary
Explore ::
Go to new places and explore them try to socialise or go on date with yourself yk solo dates spend some time with yourself! Go to cafe or a restaurant and make bunch of friends but don’t get attached to anyone! DONOTTT ! Be bold and confident because you live once and you won’t get that moment in life again so just goo for it ! You don’t wanna be old and regret to not give a goo and enjoy instead you wanna remember those beautiful memories!
Don’t give a Fu.k ::
I Personally love this one ! Because it says your energy from being wasted and your mood probably too…!
All you gotta do is react less and ignore the things that you don’t like or the people you don’t like ! Simple
Eg - they make fun of you because you’re being you :: don’t give a f and enjoy what you’re doin’
You’re bestie showed you her/his real colours and turned out to be a nasty ugly creature [ and a plastic] don’t react it was probably a lesson for you , ignore her / him
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galezellybelly · 4 months ago
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doing this cos im bored!! (ik it's actually supposed to be an ask game but uh. i wanna do it) answers under cut!
no lol i hate their asses
my beautiful gorgeous goddess gf
yeah.
oh so incredibly insecure. and in the weirdest ways possible, too
takennnn
being so incredibly fr i'll prolly accidentally kill myself. not like tomorrow or anytime soon but i'll get older and be like "yeah no i can die now. imma go do xyz obviously dangerous thing hold my drink"
i had lemon water this morning (it counts okay)
i have in the past, yes. very badly
used to, but when i got braces it hurt to and after they got taken off the habit was mostly broken
i do martial arts so like. last week. i've never street fought anyone tho (lowkey wannna to see if i could take them tho. for funsies)
yeah my girlfriend (we're dating but i still have like. a huge crush on her)
i've stayed up 6 days straight, during a finals week (and came out with a 4.0 somehow) so yes
idk. probably but if i don't like someone i usually remove them from my psyche
no actually, not someone that's emotionally gone or anything. a lot of people i used to know kinda sucked. i miss my friends all the time, but i don't think that's what they mean
two mini aussies!
being so honest? tired and stressed because im so behind on a lot of work and starting to fear it wont get done in time. but its okay, the world will keep spinning even if i miss the deadline. the brain parasites have been NASTLY lately tho so im lowkey thinking everyone hates me. its like fine tho ik its not true
yeah.
i love spiders actually they're really cute imo. still freak out for a sec tho sometimes
no.
her bed :p
imma see if i can arrange to go to the fair with my friends!
i am NOT giving birth and i don't trust myself to raise a full ass organic kid. if i end up wanting kids i'll foster or adopt, though
only the standard ear piercings, though i wanna get more (SO many more)
idk prolly like. english im good at that stuff. math if i actually pay attention, but i hate it
nope they can suck my not-yet-existent dick
one of those ultraviolet monsters. or a code red mountain dew. anything that tastes like battery acid would do rn tbh
doubt it lol
nope
yeah bcuz i was crying and it made her cry lol
the fact that im answering a list of questions instead of getting off my ass and doing the work im so worried about
i've been told they do. working on believing it :3
ooooo i like a lot of them. anything bright and eyestrain-y
hell yeah i do 🙌
a version of my friend that wasn't actually them but like. in the dream they were. yk?
my girlfriend
not really. if it was a genuine mistake, yeah, but if it was just being shitty then hell no
forget, definitely. but i usually can forgive before i manage to forget
yeah, so far. although 2023 has some weird nostalgia to it that i don't feel anymore
13 lol
no??
this one specific brand of spicy noodles
not really for a reason, no. but i think everything that happens was supposed to, even if it doesn't necessarily affect the final outcome
painted my nails, for some reason
okay hear me out. if you are in an abusive relationship and cannot leave but find someone you love and they know you can't leave, i think it would be fine to date them. unless it's a situation like that, where you can't leave the relationship, than no.
i try not to be, although i suspect i too often speak before i think
in martial art, prolly like. idk a lot. like i said tho no street fights yet
i don't know. i don't think that how you feel about someone can be predetermined or "meant to be" everyone has differences and fights; it's up to you and your partner(s) to figure out how to deal with them.
i answered this one on an ask but i'll go with rain =]
when its good snow and not just dirty slush, yeah
i'd be happy just being in a relationship with my partner for the rest of my life without having to officially get married, but ig the tax benefits would be nice
yeahhhh lol
the people i love
not legally. the government doesn't have to know. but just in friend circles yeah, i might
not at all
(gonna remove the "opposite sex" part of these questions lol) i mean. my gf was my best friend before we were dating. she still is. but if another one of my friends told me that. uh. i would be flattered but IM MARRIED
yeah! a lot of them, actually. im very lucky
i mean the last person i talked to was one of my friends. uh.
probably also one of my friends, if you can call that a deep conversation
yes and no
yeah, in a minute. so many of them
it only goes till 60 cuz the original list skipped from 40 to 51 lol
this was not read thru and heavily unedited so uh. sorry
70 horrible questions ... Fuck it
01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents? 02: Who did you last say “I love you” to? 03: Do you regret anything? 04: Are you insecure? 05: What is your relationship status? 06: How do you want to die? 07: What did you last eat? 08: Played any sports? 09: Do you bite your nails? 10: When was your last physical fight? 11: Do you like someone? 12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours? 13: Do you hate anyone at the moment? 14: Do you miss someone? 15: Have any pets? 16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment? 17: Ever made out in the bathroom? 18: Are you scared of spiders? 19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? 20: Where was the last place you snogged someone? 21: What are your plans for this weekend? 22: Do you want to have kids? How many? 23: Do you have piercings? How many? 24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)? 25: Do you miss anyone from your past? 26: What are you craving right now? 27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? 28: Have you ever been cheated on? 29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry? 30: What’s irritating you right now? 31: Does somebody love you? 32: What is your favourite color? 33: Do you have trust issues? 34: Who/what was your last dream about? 35: Who was the last person you cried in front of? 36: Do you give out second chances too easily? 37: Is it easier to forgive or forget? 38: Is this year the best year of your life? 39: How old were you when you had your first kiss? 40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked? 51: Favourite food? 52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason? 53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night? 54: Is cheating ever okay? 55: Are you mean? 56: How many people have you fist fought? 57: Do you believe in true love? 58: Favourite weather? 59: Do you like the snow? 60: Do you wanna get married? 61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby? 62: What makes you happy? 63: Would you change your name? 64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed? 65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do? 66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around? 67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to? 68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with? 69: Do you believe in soulmates? 70: Is there anyone you would die for?
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bisluthq · 3 months ago
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I think he used to have a bad relationship with food and teetered into orthorexic stuff back during 1d tbh but who knows. He’s always been into woo woo shit but I think he had a shift to treating his wellness routine as training like an athlete in more recent years
I also think he used to have a worse relationship with a lot of stuff (food AND alcohol AND drugs), but he’s been working on a lot of that for the last like 5-6 years actually? I think he wasn’t as aware of what he “should be” eating in 1D days but used to feel bad about himself when he ate “bad” things lol if that makes sense? In 1D days I remember he went through a phase of like drinking bullet coffee so as not to eat anything else lol which… obviously isn’t a very great idea lol. He and Grimmy also went through a phase of like being obsessed with green tea lol idk. I think if I recall correctly he also didn’t like the 1D chef cooking for him because that was mostly more wholesome “home cooking” vibes and he was into the - as you say - woo woo stuff even then. So all of that sounds like it wasn’t that yk great. But these days I think he sticks to his pescatarianism and his juice cleanses and he does his nutrient IVs when he’s on tour and stuff and when he wants something he’s craving he does just go and eat that. He’s also said he doesn’t consume any caffeine or alcohol on tour (for the most part at least idk how religious he is about it because we did see him attend some parties like during LoT and the first tour but I do buy that those are very much exception days) but he doesn’t stick to that when he’s off tour (or intend to like it’s a tour only thing to make sure he’s feeling his best and his voice is good).
With alcohol as I say like he’s said he tries not to drink on tour (and also in general I don’t see him being a regular drinker idk) and in 1D days he was obviously as he’s said repeatedly very anxious about being caught doing something very naughty so I think tried to keep it to a minimum but we also did see him going big lol and he mentioned back then he really likes straight tequila (😳😳😳 bruh) so my guess would be he used to binge and then feel badly about it and like hate himself and tell himself never again and then go big again lmao. I do think he’s in a better place with it now though and drinks when he feels like it and doesn’t hate himself for having a big night out here and there but doesn’t really feel like doing that often lol because he’s focusing on all his 🧘‍♂️ crap.
and with drugs obviously he said he was SO anxious about being caught doing any during 1D days but obviously did experiment and then I’d guess felt really guilty every time so again I think just not super healthy as a vibe. These days I think he smokes weed now and then/eats edibles and well likely has tried like medicinal doses of shit like he’s probably gone on an Ayahausca journey or whatever.
he also meditates twice a day and does yoga and does his cold water swimming on top of gymming and he’s said a lot of that is for his mental health rather than for his looks so idk I think being so focused on that kinda makes the eating/drinking/substances a lot easier because if he knows he wants to go and do a polar plunge in the morning idk if he wants to go and do that hungover and I think he knows the polar plunge will make HIM feel better than a couple glasses of wine lol.
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lythea-creation · 5 months ago
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Changes - Nadeen x fem reader (Chapter 3)
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Chapter 1
Previous Chapter
warnings: grief, fighting, yk Hiba
word count: 920
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I was currently eating my breakfast, waiting for time to pass. It was a Sunday morning and Nadeen and I were going to hang out later again. Somehow it had turned into a routine. We were meeting up almost every day.
When I was finished eating I settled on the couch to continue reading my book. It had been one of mom's favorites and I had probably read it a dozen times since she passed.
Suddenly the book was snatched out of my hands, Hiba glaring at me as she was holding it above my head.
“Why are you always reading those?”, she questioned annoyed.
“What's your problem?”, I shot back.
“Well … they aren't yours. The book is from mom's collection. Stop going through her stuff”, Hiba complained.
“She isn't here anymore, Hiba”, I reminded both of us softly.
“Oh, you think I don't know that?”, she taunted me. “Which is exactly why I don't need you to push that reminder into my face all the time. Reading her books won't bring mom back.”
“I do feel closer to her though”, I confessed.
“How does that change anything?”, she yelled at me.
“Hiba ...”
She interrupted me: “No! You just don't get it!”
She stormed off, leaving me behind confused. What was up with her? She had even taken the book with her.
A frustrated sigh left my lips.
I missed my sister so much. The one who told me bedtime stories when I could not sleep. The one who suggested to start our own band. The one who never let me down.
We had been inseparable. Losing mom had been inevitable. She had just been too sick. We had expected it. But I had never considered losing Hiba, too.
The grief was too much. Like I was about to implode any second.
So I decided to go on a run.
I was not the fittest person, but the burning of my muscles and lungs were a welcome change for the emotional pain I could not get used to. Before I knew it my phone vibrated, signaling me that I had run 7k.
I came to a halt, bending forward as my abs were too tired to hold me upright. I was panting heavily, not even sure where I was. I had not paid attention to my surroundings at all.
And to top it all off I only had 15 minutes left before Nadeen was expecting me. So I searched for the way to her house and ran over there as well.
“Hey, what happened to you?”, Nadeen wondered.
After all I was completely out of breath, barely able to lift my head to look at her and I was still a bit late.
“I ran more than 10k”, I enlightened her panting.
“Why the hell would you do that?”, she exclaimed. “Well … come in first. I'll get you some water.”
“Thanks”, I uttered and followed her into the kitchen where I could not help but drop onto one of the chairs as soon as I could.
I hurried to gulp the water down, only realizing now how thirsty I had actually been.
“So why would you torture yourself like that?”, Nadeen inquired, her brows raised.
“I just needed to let it all out, ya know”, I stated.
“Hiba?”, she assumed.
“Mostly, yeah”, I confirmed.
Now she was the one sighing. “It really sucks that you can't even wind down at home”, she considered.
“But I'm not home right now, am I? Let's do something fun together”, I changed the topic.
“You could take a shower if you want and then we could watch a movie together”, she suggested. “Not that I'm saying you should shower, but I guess it would make sense.”
I pulled onto my sweaty shirt. “Yeah, you may be right about that. I don't have any clothes with me though. And I'm not sure if your clothes will fit me. I'm pretty tall after all”, I considered.
“Nah, I have some oversized clothes. Don't worry about that”, she assured me.
When all of that was settled, we sat down on her bed to watch one of her favorite movies.
Of course I did not tell her that horror movies were freaking me out. But I regretted that after about half an hour into it as it was surprisingly hard to suppress my startled reactions.
“Everything okay?”, she questioned with an amused grin when I grabbed onto her arm at one of the jump scenes.
“Uh-huh”, I muttered, my eyes pinned on the screen of her laptop.
I did not let her arm go again though, which she did not seem to mind.
“You could've just told me that you're scared of horror movies. We could have watched something else”, Nadeen pointed out when the movie was over.
“No, I wanted to see your favorite”, I remarked.
“That's cute”, she noted. “But the next pick is yours.”
I smiled up at her as I had ended up half-laying against her.
She reciprocated my smile and I found myself lost in her eyes. I did not even register that she was not looking away either.
Before I knew it, my lips were on hers. I had no idea how it had happened and who initiated it, but nothing had felt this right for years. So I was enjoying every moment of it.
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So what do you think about the story? I decided not to turn this one into a slowburn. Do you have any suggestions for future chapters?
Tag List: @sunwoniie
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bullshit-bulltrue · 1 year ago
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so i'm not asking for like a WHOLE blog post about ur school day on friday but PLEASE TELL ME EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED WITH BEN .
I HAVE NO LOVE LIFE AND I AM DEPENDING ON YOURS.
GOOD OR BAD, I NEED THE DEETAILS
"love life" babygirl no it's far from that 💀
but since i do like talking about him, here you go <3
☆ Hawk Talk 8/18/23 ☆ (partially)
soo um i think friday was the day i went to breakfast?? yeah
anddd i saw him but he didn't see me 👍
umm when did i see him again ..?
*thinky face*
oh duh
english
so we finished up testing !! or was that wednesday? um no i'm pretty sure it was Friday lol
so when we finished testing we did our Acheive3000
and that's an application we use for out lexile thingy btw
and we each got a sticker when we finished but i forgot to tell the teacher know i finished so i didn't get a sticker :'(
and then Garrett (Ben's short bestie) kept trying to put his sticker on Ben 💀
at one point he acted like he was gonn side hug him but ben knew that he just put a sticker on his back
and then he put the sticker on my chromebook and did two thumbs up and this cute lil facial expression and then he said "good job"
kinda like these:
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and then he kicked me 😭😭
it was to get my attention bc i was paying attention to the teacher and he wanted me to look over at Garrett (he had just got sent to the back table i believe and he looked like a kicked puppy 😭😭)
so we both started laughing so hard and i kicked him back bc yeah
and then we got into a footsie fight lmao
i didn't realize till today when i looked down at my legs when i was changing in the morning but this boy gave me a ton of bruises 😭😭
i have a really fucking high pain tolerance though so i'm bot surprised i didn't realize it
and same thing on my shoulder
on our way back from lunch (i'll talk abt that in a min) he was being a goof and when his water bottle was swaying he held it up to my shoulder and he mimicked the sound of it hitting me like that one gong instrument so from the time we enter the hallway, to going to my locker, u just hear him going "gong gong gong" lol. and then i looked at my shoulder bc it felt sore (still does) and i had this big ass bruise 💀 but at least the bruise is yellow
he's silly
so anyway
back to during lunch
i had lanie on my right side in the lunch room and there was plenty of space for Ben to sit on the right of her
but he squeezed in next to me instead, and then lanie gave me the 👀
anyway since he looked uncomfy and like he was about to fall off the bench bc his friend kept pushing him so me and lanie scooted over so he could sit properly lol
and then later on during PE, me and lanie got to talking
and that somewhat lead to boy talk with her, Olivia, and amelia
aaand
olivia and amelia think he's weird and i'm like so what 😃
at least he ain't a basic bitch
he has whimsy unlike you <3
nah i didn't actually say that
and they're cool chicks
but yk just annoys me the wrong way when people use weird as an insult
umm so since u only asked for the Boy Talk™️ , there it is <3
and now i'm gonna type up the hawk talk for today lol
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whinecrate · 2 years ago
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9.2.23 asked me out well not really but ye and i turned him down well not really but ye
11.2.23 changed my mind said yes
19.2.23 first date at bake shack he gets some lemony tart thing that he actually liked for once I think I got the Irish coffee cake or something like that and coffees he got me origami flowers n the scanning thingy for the Spotify playlist with the songs we played at pondi on the couch. Didn't so much ask him to be my boyfriend more just told him he's my boyfriend now. In my defence i did tell him earlier itself cuz the person I'm dating is too long to call him but waited till first date. Accidentally ended up being on sa's bday
5.5.23 first kiss spent the whole day almost out with him at krish went out early morning n just chilled for the first few hours and eventually went to the back n we were alone for so very long but it still took time straight up asked him if he was ever gonna kiss me n he wanted to then but still didn't and I was getting hungry n he had to go pack n give his luggage at the dorm but yeah a grand total of 7hrs with light rain to set the mood he just pulled me close him half sitting on the half wall n me between his legs with foreheads touching before a kiss but i get overwhelmed n just hug him rinse repeat multiple times till it finally happens. It's awkward n cute. We kiss twice n then have to leave on the way back i get a donut from cdef and get drenched in the rain
19.8.23 6mo anniversary didn't do anything but it was just a nice day went out n some time on the lawn just chilling
20.8.23 a decent amount of making out at student but still pretty pg cute kisses
27.8.23 proper make out on his lap facing him half in the rain with his hands up my shirt gripping me and pulling and pushing me closer occasionally grabbing my thighs hands roaming almost all over under my shirt just got caught up in the heat of the moment god that was hot I can't show my face at student for a while now and the timing the heavy rain and my in time i probably crossed it by a few min atleast
3.9.23 made out a fair bit at student and he gave me a hickey for the first time but he was worried about it showing so it was so smol like a tiny little puppy nibble
27.10.23-29.10.23 well..huh..that was a lot.. I got used to being topless around him pretty fast. Like there was still the slight hesitation taking my shirt off the fist time and the first time taking bra off yes lights off and still kinda shy but after that it was so easy. And he certainly got used to taking my bra off himself pretty easily. And God the hickeys was that too much? Ill be honest I loved how it looked tho. Limitations cuz can't be too visible especially with farewell coming up although even this is too much and isn't gonna go by then but god it was definitely nice. He did ask is it's too soon for all the way tho. And yeah idt I'd want this soon. It might still take some time. But this was definitely progress. And slow baby steps are better considering it's a first for everything for both of us. It definitely helped that the room was big and pretty and it was just right yk? The environment the mood everything. The whole trip its not like we could have done anything else other than the exam so it just gave us enough and more time together. Maybe that was a bit too rough tho cuz I did feel kinda sore down there later and slightly bruised ig and i could definitely feel his hip digging into me even later on.
17.11.23-19.11.23 ok so much for keeping it pg at sachs house I was sick the whole time but evidently it only made me hornier. Well one night atleast. I told him he's gonna get sick and he was like no it's fine and of course next day he was decently sick too. He was kinda clingy next day too but I was too sick to really be into it. He was so nice to me when I was sick tho. Getting me hot water multiple times and constantly checking if I need anything etc just sorta being there for me for the most part. But yeah kinda bruised again i should really learn my lesson. On the other hand i actually did get kinda wet? He's definitely not gonna let that go i should just have kept my mouth shut. Kidding.
22.3.24 slept on the single upper berth together cuddling but it just turns me on so much when he holds me like that and grips me tighter esp when it's rhythmic and he loves it when I moan softly and i was definitely doing plenty of that and lightly grinding on him and kissing his neck or lips when it gets good and now he thinks i have a thing for risky
23.3.24 wasn't too awkward surprisingly and i wasn't too shy once it got to a decent amount of making out i told him I'd be down for all the way which idt he expected me to say so yay points for that i even took off my shorts and panties without really thinking too much about it but I was way too tight and it just really hurt when he tried to finger me and we decided to let it be and God i felt so horrible about it and he kept asking me if I was fine and i kept deflecting till i eventually just hugged him and cried and he was so nice and trying to convince me that it's completely fine and i have no reason to feel bad about it and he's completely fine with it etc actually idek why i cried i just did and when I finally stopped he was just so nice to me and trying to make me feel better and offering to get me milkshake the next day etc that I just ended up crying over that and he just held me the whole time
24.3.24 and I was still so tight nothing was supposed to happen cuz he was drinking but it wasn't much and he was drunk but he was gonna leave me alone but yeah when he gets me for just this much time it's hard and it's not like i really opposed it either I was still too tight but it got better but it was still tight around a single finger we tried all the way thrice and the last time it actually did go it a bit but it hurts too much so I'm not sure if I am a virgin or not at this point cuz technically it wasn't proper sex but it was something although hmm ig handjobs are pretty decent it's not too bad at all and dicks are .. slightly bigger than I was expecting esp the girth and i love the way he reacts but i still couldn't make him finish (actually we might have done that yesterday itself cuz I do remember making out in the shower n then taking a quick shower both mornings) and God the shower today was something else he had me pinned against the wall with both my hands up and the other fingering me and he loved how much I arch my back and moan i actually do moan a fair bit evidently and at that point I was so wet you could hear it and he's never gonna let that go and I was still too tight but did loosen up a considerable amount and i still couldn't make him finish but he just did it himself while holding me and gripping me and i keep kissing his neck etc and ykw i do like it when he gets himself off evidently and then we showered together quickly but he hates the cold water and warned me against splashing it on him and said that he'd make me regret it and i didn't really know what I was expecting him to do but obv curiosity so I just splash it onto him and he just grabbed me and started fingering me again and the fucking audacity the balls the cockiness god that was hot and i do love that my legs get so weak and he has to hold me
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jalapenobee · 6 months ago
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do you make your bed?
i mean i straighten my blanket in the morning? but otherwise there's not much to "make"
favorite number?
27. it's satisfying...
job?
unemployed 😎 hoping to find one soon though (preferably in marine biology or music)
if you could go back to school, would you?
still in school but no. can't i just magically retain information (like sigma) and skip class?
can you parallel park?
can't drive for that matter
a job you had that would surprise people?
haven't had one yet TvT
do you think aliens are real?
okay. not a vehement believer in either side but if aliens are confirmed to be real then i don't wanna be that pretentious guy all "aLiEnS aReNt rEaL" so. i do think there is a chance we are looking for the wrong thing when we want to look for aliens? like they may not need oxygen, water, e.t.c. so...
can you drive a manual car?
like a regular car? no?
guilty pleasure?
hard copy manga. currently i have four books (two of bsd dead apple, one of given, and the sxf fanbook) but i wanna get more...
tattoos?
none. yet :)
favorite color?
two actually. sage green and whatever red you call it that i use for lineart (vaguely like period blood color but if i say that to people they look at me weird). also any light-grayish shade of purple
favorite type of music?
AHHHHH MUSIC QUESTION okay one thing abt me is that i love music. my one and true love and i listen to too many genres to keep track of. but...rock ballads maybe? those tend to be my favorites or really anything heartfelt or aggressive i'd vibe with
do you like puzzles?
LOVE puzzles
phobias?
nope :)
favorite childhood sport?
hmmm basketball i think. i used to play in the driveway in the summer but then yk it got hot and everything and i just got tired of it
do you talk to yourself?
only when i'm reciting something (paragraph, formula, e.t.c.)
what movie(s) do you adore?
my neighbor totoro...it's so close to my heart ahhh
coffee or tea?
ummm both. either drink i've made hot but cooled before i could drink it really pisses me off though (although less for tea)
first thing you wanted to be growing up?
I DON'T REMEMBER i think though, when i was like eight or nine i wanted to be a lawyer (don't anymore lmao)
wooo here we go @vee-is-a-clown @klance-daydreams @dapperenby13 @numerous-bees-in-a-skin-suit @rachi-roo @reikurusu @jumpscaregoose @circuslemon @autistic-ranpo @lesbiankordian and anyone else :D
Ask Meme
I was tagged by @rosencrantzsguildenstern for this ask meme, so why not!
Do you make your bed?
Uhhhh well. Sort of. I definitely make it any time I expect I'm going to have company, but on a weekday when I'm the only one in my dorm room? Nah. I didn't make it when I had a roommate either unless I thought she was going to have company (but she never warned me in advance for that so LMAO)
What's your favorite number?
I'm a lucky 7 kind of gal, but I also really jive with 36 and 81. My factors of 9 <3 <3 <3 If I have to pick one, it's always going to be 7 though
What is your job?
Right now, I work for the US Department of Agriculture! I've worked some other random jobs though, such as a waitress at a high-end retirement home and an assistant at a local hospital
If you could go back to school, would you?
Yes. Absolutely. I would reduce how many classes I take (because haha I am at 22 credit hours right now :')) but I love learning! I don't love all the pomp and circumstance of academia, but I've considered becoming a teacher several times as a career option and I actually have taught in a professional setting before. School's a love of mine that even all the stresses I've put myself through hasn't fully been killed
Can you parallel park?
Yep! My city almost never requires it because it's a newer one and street parking is only really used in our tiny downtown or in neighborhoods, but I can do it!
A job you had that would surprise people?
Uhhhh I think my current job is that, LOL! But even then, once I explain the details of my job, people seem to think it fits me pretty well :)
Do you think aliens are real?
I think that somewhere in space, there's something that could be considered life, but we can't agree if viruses are living, so I doubt that whatever could be "life" in another part of space would fit our current definitions! Evolution is already fucked enough as is, so accidentally going down any path that resembles what happened on Earth feels pretty unlikely to me
Can you drive a manual car?
Yes! I practiced with my grandpa's old car, though I also stalled a few times LOL so I'm not GOOD, but I can do it! With more practice I think I would be fine
What's your guilty pleasure?
I'm not really sure? I'm not really guilty about any of my pleasures because they're all pretty vanilla? In my household it's definitely mayo though. No one in my household likes mayo and I usually have to deal with Bullying of the highest degree if I want to use it when I'm eating with my sister and parents
Tattoos?
Nope! And I don't want to get them either. I have an irrational thing of permanently adding things to my body to the point where I had a surgery to remove a part of my flesh instead of having a tiny metal rod inserted in me. Tattoos are filed under the same "body modification" ick mentally
Favorite Color?
A soft lilac! I also really like the darker, desaturated greens, but purple is my eternal love
Favorite type of music?
Things that lean more into the rock side of things! I like harsher sounds, faster tempos, that sort of thing, but also my music taste is literally all over the place. It really really REALLY is a case-by-case basis but if I had to say anything, most Paramore songs are ones I love
Do you like puzzles?
It depends on the puzzle! I like logic and math puzzles, and mysteries are fun as well, but a jigsaw is something I'll only really do if I'm with friends or exceedingly bored
Any phobias?
Well, there's that body modification one I mentioned earlier! I also have an irrational fear of beetles and an even more irrational fear of specifically dropping a kitchen knife into my foot! Yowch!
Favorite childhood sport?
I didn't really play sports as a kid, but if I had to pick one, probably swimming? My current favorite sport is definitely dancing, though (folk and ballroom!)
Do you talk to yourself?
Yep! I use both the singular and plural first person pronouns "I" and "We" when I talk to myself. Generally, I use "I" when I'm more passively thinking, and "We" when I'm being metacognizant.
What movie(s) do you adore?
Back to the Future (1985) by Robert Zemekis my BELOVED!!!! I cannot recommend it enough, and I made a quote from it my senior quote in high school. I also really love The Sixth Sense (1999) and Tangled (2010)
Coffee or tea?
Tea, as I have yet to ever drink coffee! But when I drink my tea, I like it unsweetened and iced
First thing you wanted to be when growing up?
First thing I remember was, ironically, a teacher! Some things don't change <3
I'm gonna tag @riinsanity @0mega-x @koi0boi @always-a-joyful-note and @yukimomodivorce but anyone can join in!
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