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a-man-in-the-crowd · 2 days ago

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Pluto Is Trans (in my humble opinion)

okay so as far as i'm aware this is a pretty common hc in the fandom (i lurk in the tumblr side of the fandom mostly and i haven't taken the time to go through the pluto tag simply bc i wanted to make this post first), BUT i just wanted to add my two cents into it bc i love pluto and need a reason to yap about him

i'm mostly going to be focusing on him in the maze arc, simply because i think his character has remained pretty consistent since then, as well as his flashback. if i ever noticed anything else in later (or even future) chapters i might come back to this but for now i think i basically have everything i can think of down

of course most of this is still pretty much projecting ☠️ i'm pretty well aware pluto isn't like ACTUALLY trans. this is just a headcanon based on things we've seen of him, not like an actual theory or anything

1. His Appearance

so the first thing that really got me thinking about how he has major trans vibes is his design

comically oversized coat that covers up his actual figure, he's slouching (to hide his chest, mayhaps??), and his hair gives me major trans vibes for reasons i'm not sure how to explain but like let me try anyways

maybe i'm digging too deep into this, but his hair feels VERY different from the other male characters (montresor with gorgeous shoulder-length hair is an outlier and shall not be counted) and again i have no clue how to put words to this but it has the vibes of someone who's too nervous to cut it too short bc 'what if it looks bad' (re: what if i look like i'm trying too hard to look like a guy). but that might just be the projection talking.

oh yeah, he's also the shortest male character as far as i'm aware. basically every male character towers over him (so, so real, i fear) and even will is taller than him (though apparently will is 5'10??? idek anymore 😭). now, does being short make you afab? no, obviously not. but that + the fact he's wearing and oversized shirt gives me some major trans vibes

most of this stuff is incidental, but honestly that's definitely the most actually concrete thing i have to explain myself

fear not, though, i can and WILL read too deep into things and i will read things however i wish

2. His Agoraphobia

the only 'level' of the fear maze that he has a big reaction to is the agoraphobia level. why?

now, could this very reasonably because he's paranoid? yes. but you can be paranoid AND trans. in fact, i think the two frequently go hand-in-hand, especially in areas where being 'caught' as trans can be dangerous.

perhaps he's scared of being stared at because he fears they'll figure out he isn't 'really' a man. and what then, when they figure it out? what'll they do then?

i wouldn't be surprised if pluto had some sort of traumatic experience while being in a crowd alone. this doesn't necessarily have anything to do with my hc, but it very well could. we know he's very small and frail, it doesn't seem like he had many friends when he was alive, and the neighbourhood he lived in doesn't seem particularly safe. he has plenty reason to be terrified, even ignoring my silly lil hc, but i think this particular debilitating fear implies he has genuine experience with something bad happening in a crowd.

3. He's Physically Affectionate

something something you can be a cis guy and be physically affectionate something something this is just a thing to consider in relation to literally everything else i'm talking about something something

anyways

he's my emotional support animal actually ❤️

obviously we've seen other male characters be physically affectionate (like duke), but this is definitely a trait i'd ascribe the most to pluto. now, does this mean anything in isolation? of course not. he has trauma, he could've just been desperate for affection when he was alive and therefore in his afterlife he has this overwhelming need to aggressively hug his friends (which is a completely fair interpretation and i think most of the the things i talk about are a combination of trauma and being trans)

but like just let me say my piece. what if he's more physically affectionate because he was raised with, let's say 'feminine rules of socializing' — which is to say, hugging your friends is extremely normal and in fact encouraged.

this is one of those things where like if it weren't for everything else i wouldn't be saying anything, but BECAUSE of everything else i feel the need to scrutinize a bit more. i think it's definitely one of my weaker points but like. i don't care, ngl.

4. His Flashback

sooo funny story i can barely ever read this scene for multiple reasons (i feel so bad for pluto i want him to be crushed by the weight of all his friends' hugs and love he deserves it) but i will try my best to recall it and get like a semi-decent photo in for reference

i think this scene is kinda what confirms in my head that this shall remain a hc, because pluto's dad refers to him as a boy and by his name (which i will get don't worry i could never forget about how incredibly transgender it is to be named fucking PLUTO). but, consider: i am delusional and a professional bullshitter.

so here is my absolutely nonsensical take based on nothing but vibes and some unfortunate personal experiences 🎉

this is gonna be my biggest 'bear with me yet', but plzplzplz bear with me. obviously by no stretch of the imagination would pluto's bitchass dad be supportive of him being trans or whatever word they'd use to describe pluto when he was alive (i've seen people theorize around ww1? idk man i don't have the knowledge on time periods required to rlly theorize about that).

but, just because someone calls you the right name and pronouns and terms doesn't make them an ally. this specific line from pluto's dad absolutely REEKED of that weaponization of gender dysphoria that at the very least i have experienced. taking every opportunity to tear down your gender identity because you're not stereotypically [gender] enough. someone like pluto's dad definitely feels like someone who would, instead of trying to deny pluto's identity, use it against him to make him feel shitty.

after all, having a son has its merits. pluto can work with no problem whatsoever, and something tells me that pluto's dad is a raging misogynist anyways. but that doesn't make him care any more for his kid, just make him more useful. and in reality, pluto's dad probably thinks it all one huge joke.

but yk that's just me yapping

5. HIS NAME IS FUCKING PLUTO?

okay so judging by pluto's comment to eulalie about his name, i think it's pretty safe to assume that he was specifically named after the roman god. and from what we've seen of pluto's dad, there is NO WAY he was the one who named him. unless pluto's dad for whatever reason had an admiration for roman mythology of all things. maybe autism runs in the family who knows.

now, i don't want to discount the idea that maybe his mother was the one who named him, but like i'm not even sure what the hell happened to his mom. so like. idk.

the name pluto in general definitely gives off the vibes of 'i named myself at twelve' (/affectionate, if your name is pluto you are beautiful and loved). it's nerdy but also mildly edgy. not exactly a common name, either. and the fact he knows his greek mythology implies interest in this sort of thing.

now, could his interest in greek and roman mythology be because of his mother, who could have named him pluto? yes, of course. in fact, the idea of a woman who was presumably living in poverty naming her son after the roman god of riches makes me teary-eyed. but so does the idea of a little trans boy living a shitty life with his shitty dad (who probably drained most of their money on booze, let's be real) naming himself after the roman god of riches.

also, the way he responds to eulalie gives off the vibe of 'well, i literally named myself after the roman god pluto so'. but that could just be me.

and last, but certainly not least...

6. His Spectre

this one is the cherry on top for me personally

he wants to escape the binds of society? go beyond what humanity deems admissible? YK LIKE BECOMING A DIFFERENT GENDER???

i don't have anything much else to say about the fact he's a cryptid, but yk what i do have more to say on?

6.5 So, like, wtf does it mean to be a 'domesticated cryptid'? — A Theory

now i am fully operating under my trans pluto hc, but i think this idea might be able to make sense with the canon of him being probably cis.

ms poppet says that cryptids are people who wish to 'go beyond what society deems admissible' — hence, they're generally wild animals. perhaps the reason pluto is a housecat is because the 'inadmissible' thing he wanted to do was live his life as he is; a normal, regular, cisgender man — or just like in general a normal dude, something he couldn't do for not-necessarily-trans reasons (like, maybe, being able to escape life with his shitty father).

he's not a wild animal because he didn't want to live outside of society, he wanted to be fully integrated into it as a normal person but he thought this impossible because society has already deemed him other. he could never be more than the role he was assigned — not the same way he could were he a normal, cis guy.

—

so yeah that's the end of my little ramble, if you read all the way thank you very much for letting me yap bc honestly i think the more i wrote this post the more genuinely convinced i was that pluto's trans. like idc if canon 100% proves me wrong it's too late i will simply ignore it and invent my own canon.

#pluto nevermore #i wanted to talk about his behaviour in relation to his trauma #but like #this post is supposed to be about his trans coding #and i didn't wanna get carried away #headcanon #nevermore webtoon #nevermore webcomic

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charlesemersonwinchesteriii · 1 month ago

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What if Christos Lawton is the one responsible for putting I Say A Little Prayer For You on the official George Hodgson playlist. What then. On the one hand I would have to set myself on fire but on the other hand it would be FANTASTIC news for whoever authored my all time favorite post on the Cold Boys Kink Meme

#I just love the way it's worded. There's something so beautiful about it. Something freeing. Why shouldn't they indeed.#The odds of this are probably even worse than the standard ''1 out of however-many-songs-on-the-playlist chance'' for various reasons.#But I can't stop thinking about it.#Can't believe this prompt is unfilled btw. especially after witnessing the camp discord during the infamous Garrigan/Harris video call.#The RPF fandom very clearly yearns for. well. the RPF.#also yes that link does lead to the famous Epaulette Shimmying video. of course. god bless. my favorite video in the whole world <3 #Starky's Original Posts #ok last time I made a post and deliberately did the responsible thing #and kept my ship tag out of the first five tags so it wouldn't pollute the actual ship tag seen by everyone else #but then to my horror it showed up there anyways #hopefully that doesn't happen again smfh #hodgving #the terror #''so did you finally fuckin--'' NO I'm not allowed to look/listen til Tuesday at the earliest. OCD said so and also at this point I need it #to bait myself into getting through the day. there's too much to do and my will to do literally anything at all #is at just about the lowest it's ever been #I haven't eaten anything besides a few crackers and pretzels for three days.#good good. it isn't even hungry anymore. it doesn't even want to live.#BUT. I WANT GEORGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <3<3<3 SO WE PERSIST

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umbral-stigmata-unbound · 1 day ago

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He could certainly pay the fee, but he'd save that until the morning. "Don't worry your little head, I'll pay." he chuckled, table the others glass, and getting a bigger one and filling it with filtered water. He brought it back and took his seat once again, drinking a shots-worth of what he'd had before and setting aside his glass.

To the question, he seemed to consider answering, before finally shrugging. "I think my reaction during our private visit back at the Inn should've been answer enough." he stated, somewhat teasingly, wearing a crooked grin. He ran a hand through red strands that fell back into chaos even after his efforts.

"I'm usually only there for work. A couple of times for my own enjoyment, of course--I make sure I'm a fun, lovable patron of course. But no. I haven't seen any of your shows before. I've never been close enough to recognize you." he answered honestly. It had no baring on the situation or his work. He wondered what he would've did, had he noticed him, though...? Would he have reached out, or turned a blind eye? He couldn't be sure of Shivan's situation from the outside, anyways.

Just to be a shithead, of course, he quirked his head and grinned, raising a brow. "Should I pay to observe sometime soon, you think? You disappointed I haven't?"

Was he flirting? Lazily, sure. When he was around someone attractive, it was fairly automatic, no matter how serious or playful. Shivan had been pretty, even handsome when they ran around on the streets together, but now? Boy had he aged well.

However, Reno knew not to cross the many lines laid here.

Shivan raised an eyebrow- the threat was expected. If there was one Turk asking about something, more would follow. They worked together in a similar way to the honeybees- or at least, the whispers in the back said so. When a honeybee had a problem, other members of the inn would help snuff it out and band together. If the Turks had a source, then like the honeybee's they would come together on the source to get what they could out of it.

"If you can pay the fee, then I'll stay the night. Going back means I get stuck explaining why you brought me back early, and generally working either the doors, or the floor since I'm not scheduled for any on stage performances." Shivan hummed, giving a small smile, albeit a little strained. "I'm not a huge drinker, so water, if you don't mind? I do have one other question- not pertaining to our work itself. Have you ever seen one of my shows?"

For some reason, he couldn't imagine Reno being there. At the Honeybee? Of course. Sitting and watching Shivan on stage during one of the dances, when he was in the background? Possibly. But his own shows? He couldn't see Reno being one of the people in the crowd for some reason. Shivan didn't feel any shame in his skills as a pole dancer of course- it took a long time to learn how to dance on the poles, and even longer to build up the core muscles needed to do so. He'd been a bartender and greeter at the inn when he'd started learning it, and he was proud of where he'd managed to get. But Reno didn't seem like the type to enjoy that kind of performance to him.

#escortingsecrets #number one red bastard ~ Reno #V::BF #T::Here We Go Again; main

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sysig · 1 year ago

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New dream OCs drop (Patreon)

#Doodles #Dream Log #Original #Been a while! I always appreciate when my subconscious mind drops non-human humanoids on me lol #This case is was an older gay couple of like? they looked pretty normal generally but they had a specific feature lol #That when they blushed rather than their skin changing colour their fur would fluff out over their whole body haha #It was very fast! Kinda like Mystique's scale-fur? But only with blushing and then when they calmed down their fur would retract haha #One of the couple was way easier to fluster than the other tho haha so I really only saw it on him #I get the feeling it was also kind of GOmens inspired - specifically Aziraphale which is still so weird to me because I haven't seen??#Or read anything GOmens?? Why brain #Smol was picking on me the other day while we were making Picrews together that I was basically just making a Crowley as well like damn!#Brain why #Anyway lol #These two had that very settled-in married feel of lightly picking on each other out of love haha #The more chill of the two liked to fluster his husband and in return he would lightly poke at him for his old-fashion fashion haha #Which of course he offered as well! Also in play! It was cute #I think they both had blue fur and light skin hmm - you can see the little whispies on ascot lol that was the main different feature #They were chunky and defied gravity like that too! It's gotten fuzzy to recall now but I'm certain of that #How silly

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brainrotzora · 5 months ago

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these things are always happening to the ones i like :////////

anyways the lighting in this dungeon is so nice

didn't get any good pics bc i was too busy dungeoning but so pretty...best dungeon music so far goes to snowcloak though btw

#ffxivposting #i knew it was coming bc i tried to use the google search bar as a spellcheck for his name (LOL) like a DUMBASS because in the suggestions..#i was like no!! no!! but he's so funny!!!!!! and the second he showed up in game again i started taking screenshots of me n the bestieee #it wouldnt be accurate to say that i am Emotional about this but i am like aw man...but he was so funny...insert montage of All The Memorie #was crazy seeing her looking so distressed in a cutscene. girl me too! he was so funny </3 #the loud ass screenshot sound effects throughout the cutscene were funny though.this is who i am #altogether i have like 150+ screenshots of this game thus far.serious shit #IN OTHER NEWS:#- i cant stop laughing at finding out that a.lphinaud is in fact 16 years old. like i was guessing he was 17 or so but man it checks out #so hard. smart fella or not of course the sixteen year old boy naively founded a private army. it checks out so hard. hes cute :)#- since the tail end of arr patch quests ive been checking npc dialogue of relevant characters and thats a bit of a goldmine sometimes #- the first time aymeric(?) (not double checking via google ive learned my lesson) showed up i joked that he was going to be an akc type #and well no. he's really not. but i did cackle when it was revealed that he was a bastard child. clocked him on accident #- addicted to dalamud red dye. was funny when estinien started rocking his blood red armor like omg now we're Extra twinsies!#funny to me when they acknowledge the whole drg class stuff. like ah yes the Other azure drg. sorry estinien this feels like stolen valor #this is just what happens when u play f.fiv multiple times when u are r like 6. and also just think lances are sexy.#- can't wait to find out where tf the rest of the scions went. hi guys. you wont Believe what happened while you were AFK!#that's right! dragons! and then theyre like I Haven't Seen The Light Of The Sun For An Ambiguous Amount Of Time...cowabummer!#i keep joking abt needing to do a wellness check on urianger but honestly hes fine hes living it up in the sand. hes doing fine #- anyway can someone do a wellness check on ysayle(?).#- i've unlocked flight in a couple zones! thankkk god. some of these places are ROUGH to navigate without it sometimes.#- my keybinds are rough. also i have a gauge now. havent gotten to use it bc of level sync but anyway this feels like school #dont worry chat i only do duties with other real players when i Literally Have To Because They Make Me #- anyway. very ? about what theyre going to do with the rest of this story. intrigued. and quite sleepy i must say.

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thuganomxcs · 3 days ago

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━━ ❝ 𝐓𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐡𝐢𝐭 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐥𝐲. ❞ He said with a gin on his face after feeling those gentle lips of hers pecking his cheek. “It’s alright if you do wear heels..now. Ya had t’ know you weren’t gonna stay taller than me forever.” He said proudly as he set the table, everything organized and ready for them. “Oh that’s right, I gotta start the tea..or are you thinkin’ of coffee or yourself today?”

He then heard that he’d need clothes for three days. Oh that’s so easy. “That means I’d need One T-shirt t’ wear in the hotel, then a jacket, pants, and another shirt for our outing at dinner..a little somethin’ elegant and then just casual stuff for the cage match. Though..new boxers wouldn’t be bad..I mean I can still breathe but if we’re replacin’ everythin’ might as well go all the way.”

Then she spoke about MEASURING HIM. “Don’t know what the new penis size has gotta do with clothes but I mean if ya wanna measure it I’d say go for it.” He’d most likely love to come out and say he was teasing her, but this was simply one of those moments where his mind didn’t work as well as it should have. Though at the very least he wasn’t nervous about it any longer with her.

All in all the breakfast had been a successful one, they had their fill, Yusuke probably too much as he had stolen some of her portions with his chopsticks. Even goading her into kissing him if she’d wanted the food back. “H’alright time t’ see what I can find. I do know I have some stretchy stuff.” Said Yusuke returning into their room. Then came out all dressed.

A simple T-shirt and long pants. “These were always a little big for me..and now they’re just right. Who’d thought I’d have an entire closet t’ get rid of now..so many clothes tossed away...Oh wait, I can't leave yet..I haven't seen my boys and my girls." Of course referring towards both dogs, hens, rooster..and even that troublemaker Moka, so he left for the backdoor and was immediately greeted by the two larger dogs. Yusuke had changed in appearance..however, they KNOW HIM, the bond was far deeper than simple physical recognition and of course, Yusuke pets them in return. "There's my boys, See that Tai? Now I'm tall enough so people won't think I'm YOUR BITCH when I take you for walks. And no I didn't forget about you Shin. Did ya see the other troublemaker?"

AS SOON AS SHE OPENED THE DOOR, Botan could smell Yusuke cooking. It's something she's really come to like about living with Yusuke, the house always smells so nice, so warm and inviting, a reminder that when she comes home someone is waiting for her with a home cooked meal.

The table is set and ready when she comes in, having slipped her shoes off at the door. Botan walks toward Yusuke and startles a little upon first glance. Right... he's taller. "This is going to take some getting used to," she said, leaning up to kiss his cheek. "or I'm going to have to start wearing heels all the time."

Botan takes a seat at the table and once Yusuke is with her, she starts eating. "If we don't have time to pack after going shopping, we can come back after lunch. The stay is for two nights, so we don't have to come home right after the show ends. You'll need clothes for three days," she glances over to him, pursing her lips. "...Maybe we should measure you before we go." She's curious to know exactly how much bigger he's gotten.

When she finishes eating, Botan stands up and passed Yusuke on her way into the kitchen. "I'll clean up, go see if you can find something to wear and we'll go out," she instructs.

#❛ rp ━ all these bitches comin' but i'm stayin' at the ready.#❛ au ━━ heard you turned it up to 99 well bitch you gettin' betty'd.#❛ yutan ━━ now i tell a single truth there’s you in everything i do.#deathblossomed #he'll take that as a challenge #she fly there and he runs and make it into a race

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doberrrman · 5 months ago

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I have this feeling that I have unofficial beef with my neighbor...

#text #okay so if you wanna know:#this old lady above our apartment didn't like me even before I moved in #when she first met me we had some guys over who uninstalled and took away the old kitchen cause we were getting a new one #and she instantly tried to file some sort of complaint that it was apparently against the house rules to put spacious furniture into the #elevator without some sort of cover because the elevator could get scratches or something but get this #there was nothing in the house rules that said this. my dad even asked the ppl in charge of the house rules and they confirmed that #pretty weird isn't it? well haven't seen each other too often so I had the fortune of not having to put up with her... until 2 days ago #I just did my laundry and wanted to put it up on the communal drying rack in the basement #you also have to know that the neighbors to the right of us smoke weed. A LOT. I don't rly care you do you but they seem to smoke 24/7 #So much their entire apartment reeks of weed and they actually open their apartment door for like 1 hour in the evening to air #and of course our entire floor smells. so I get into the elevator and wanted to press the button for the basement floor but I notice it #suddenly goes up. and I'm just like okay fine.... until I run into the weird old lady and we stare at each other awkwardly #and I'm like “well... you need to go up or down...?” and she's like “I need to go down but I don't wanna get into the elevator with you..”#(get ready for what she says next) “... because your laundry smells” and you should have seen my confusion. I was so damn close to saying #“you think I put WEED into my laundry?? are you sure???” but I didn't say anything and just went well okay then not ig #So I go to the basement and put up my laundry a little bewildered but still mostly amused go back up and sleep over it #Well today I returned from college and went down to collect the laundry when I found a little piece of paper hung right next to it that said #“when you leave the washroom turn of the lights” but I swear to god I put out the light I'm 100% sure. And like she also knew I was down #there cause I was in the elevator and like why would someone put in all this effort to print out a piece of paper instead of just turning #the lights off themselves??? Idk maybe I rly did leave the lights on and this is a weird paranoia I'm having #but I can't shake of the feeling that it was her and she's trying to beef with me rly hard. idk old ppl are so weird man...

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woosh-floosh · 2 years ago

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I've been inching my way though the UK game show TASKMASTER and wondering how well a COMPLETELY live twitch show could work (excluding prerecorded tasks of course!).

Twitch streamers are already fiercely competitive, used to embarrassment, and have little human dignity left so I think they would be prime candidates to be subjected to tasks!! You could probably bring in youtubers and tiktokers in there too I guess

Think about it! A five night special event live on twitch! With a live audience and twitch audience participation! Sure it would probably be bad and clunky and realistically I'll probably despise some of the contestants but I think it could be fun!!

But would I rather see Jerma985 as the taskmaster or a contestant is the question....

#This is brought up about me thinking how an american taskmaster couldve been done better #I think most people agree that it was just poor casting and cutting the episode time that made the american version bad #if they fixed those two things it would probably work fine.#but thinking about where I get most of my comedy from and where I assume most of my peers get their comedy from...#its the internet. it's twitch and youtube and tiktok #there's still a stand up comedy circuit in the U.S. of course but I'm not paying attention to it and I want to see MY favorite funnymen #However... I'm on series 8 now and I recently went back and watched the potato hole task from series 2 #And I hadn't realized how tightly edited the show had become! Maybe a live version wouldn't work as well...#....though there is the 2016 live version I haven't seen #I do think Jerma would make a good taskmaster he already does the harsh abuse boss shtick on some of this event streams #and CRUCIALLY he is also a former (substitute) teacher #taskmaster

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great-master-airplane · 1 year ago

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I hate when I'm so tired, but I can't go to sleep until I figure out what random anime op has wriggled its way into my brain

#I'm just. it's 5am. I'm on week two of this stupid headache. i want sleep.#but figuring out what anime op this is? of course that's more important #i know i haven't seen the anime but i ~know~ the op #think it might be slightly older? late 2000s probably. that's the vibe. really catchy too #but i don't think it was a well-known anime? i think I'd be able to guess it if it was really popular #I'll pay you in fic if you can figure it out on your first try #... and also before i figure it out~#it sounds like this: [insert humming here]

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neuromantis · 1 year ago

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the tattoo artist said my collarbones are "incredible" and "aesthetic", thanks, i am dying for these.

#ed tw #one of our clients came in for the first time in a year and she went like ''i haven't seen you in a year and you've gotten so thin!''#like some random person remembered how i looked a year ago?#it's like that weird ed limbo #i want to be told i look good because that's what i am striving for #but mostly people tell me i look sick. and that is ALSO true of course #but i've always been concerningly thin for my height because of marfans - never in my life i have been ''average healthy weight''#it was just acceptable ''model'' type levels so no one gave a shit about my health #and now you do when i actually don't want you to?#i personally think i look good. and if that's killing me? well. like i wasn't dying before? at least my coffin wouldn't be hard to carry #if that's concerning to you too - i am eating. i am not planning to lose more and mantain just this #my GW was ridiculously low because i am number-obsessed #like many ana people #but i personally finally decided that perhaps it was TOO ridiculous #and since i like how i look now - i just have to keep this weight

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amplexadversary · 1 year ago

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Welp I have fallen for a plot twist because I'm used to no one in anime being willing to wear a fucking wig.

Not that I know voice actors in general well enough to have picked up who IBOs obligatory masked man was just by his voice after existing for two episodes.

Even though that blonde fucker was conspicuously absent.

#IBO spoilers #To be fair the only other time I've seen wigs in anime was when I watched Death Note and that was more than a decade ago #and of course Team Rocket but their disguises are paper thin by design AND their original voices very distinctive.#Haven't decided yet if IBO got better after the first 10 episodes or if I've just gotten used to of what to expect from it #What I am learning is that Gundam subs are very much a certain way and that the dubs often clarify things that are left implied #(like the subject of a sentence or a clause that gets left incomplete)#so I'm stuck trying to get the subtitles *of the dub* (annoying)#or just watching the dub but with the sub's subs (less work but also annoying)#because my autistic ass prefers details #also me calling whatshisface a blonde fucker makes me think of another notorious anime blonde who WOULD probably kill him on principle #now I've got to titter at the thought of Rein in a mobile suit. it's so out of genre.#edit: welp I've seen ep 43 now. McGillis's backstory is as fucked up as Rein's (well. Annerose's.).

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disgustedorite · 3 months ago

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I think I got someone at work fired and I've been having mixed feelings about it

#on one hand i believe she meant well and told the manager so #but on the other she was slowing down everyone else by criticizing how they stacked the boxes #and enforcing a strategy that was inefficient and time-consuming #and when i tried to use a faster and more efficient strategy while her back was turned i watched her literally knock over a built pallet #while chastising the guy who built it bc he didn't stack it to her unreasonable standards #yeah ig the pallets she built were prettier but the time wasted caused the lane to be the most backed up I've ever seen #and then when she complained on the app later she characterized me as a new hire who they'd just fired her out of nowhere for upsetting #ig because when i tried to defend myself and the others for not stacking to her standards i mentioned how we were told to do it in training?#which isnt the most efficient either but it's much faster than what she was making us do #side note getting vagued on the company app was certainly an experience #but like. i didn't complain to a manager bc i was upset #my hope was that she'd learn that her behavior was negatively affecting both her coworkers and the customers #latter due to the delay in sending packages to the distribution centers and bc many packages were getting crushed on the conveyor #bc it was so completely overloaded bc nobody could build a pallet without getting chastised #but. well she said she had been working there for 5 months #so maybe this was the last straw after many such incidents #especially since like. I've criticized stacking quality before too #but I haven't gotten in trouble #of course i didn't do anything like that #it's like. lay these flat if you can so they don't fall over + put bigger boxes in the corners so you can fit more on the next layer #but i don't tear down and redo a pallet unless it's gonna Literally Fall On Someone #idk i think a balance should be struck between speed and prettiness #it's tetris not a beauty contest #but i don't think she got that lesson she just thinks she got fired fir upsetting a 'new hire'#hence why i still feel really mixed about this

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your-internet-bf · 8 months ago

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It's been a while since you've seen a doctor, and you're nervous as you follow the nurse back to my office. What's there to be nervous about, this is just a little checkup, right? You notice the nurse's manicured burgundy nails as she knocks sharply on the door. She turns to you, smiling prettily, and says, "the doctor will see you now."

You push open the door and enter quite a large room. The nurse follows, closing the door behind you. In the center is the examination table, off to the right is a small crowd of young adults, appearing to be made up of men and women, and on the left is me, seated at my desk. "Welcome," I say, standing and extending one hand. My voice is deep, warm, and smooth, and you fumble for a moment, blushing a little, before you remember to shake my hand. Your hand is dwarfed in mine, my strong fingers encircling you, and a thought flashes unbidden through your mind - what would those fingers feel like inside you? - but, come on now, that's really not appropriate...

"I have a few students with me, as you can see. Is that alright?"

"Well, yes, of course!" Why shouldn't it be?

"Excellent. Now, I'm pioneering this new full-body examination method - it's really quite extraordinary, the maladies I can detect this way - but be warned, it is, shall we say, unorthodox. Is that alright?"

Just for a moment, you see something in my eyes, something behind the genial smile and gentle, reassuring tone. Just for a moment, you feel like some specimen, some piece of meat, pinned down under the lights with nowhere to go... but just for a moment. Surely, nothing bad can happen, and I'm a doctor, aren't I? You can trust me. So you swallow your fear, and you acquiesce.

"Excellent! Let's have a seat on the table, if you don't mind, and we'll make a start. Nurse V, if you would..."

As you sit on the table, the clinical, sterile seating a little cold against your skin, the pretty nurse steps behind the table, facing you, waiting for something. From your right, I approach, and you feel again just how much larger than you I am as my broad shoulders block out one of the ceiling lights. With all these people watching you, it takes all you have not to squeeze your legs together, just a little bit.

We begin with a quick examination of your face - "you have beautiful eyes, you know," I purr into one ear. I place one hand on the side of your neck and tilt your head; god, you've been reading too much, haven't you, the way you want these strong, expert fingers to close around your throat.

"Now, open your mouth for me, please." You oblige, and I cup your chin and slide my thumb into your mouth, pressing down on your tongue. Your eyebrows jump in surprise, and you look at me questioningly.

I smile again, still inside you. "Unorthodox, remember? Now, close your mouth and try to swallow." From behind, the nurse strokes your cheek with the back of one hand, and you feel a sudden ache between your legs. You close your lips around my thumb and swallow. It tastes... clean, mostly, as one might expect from a doctor, but you can taste the sweat underneath.

"Very good, one more time for me."

You swallow again, and you feel me slide my thumb over the surface of your tongue, pressing down, swirling in circles.

"And, one more time... yes, that's it, good job, very good job."

The praise for this degrading task is more than you can bear, and you squeeze your thighs together. Fuck, it's humiliating, everyone just saw you do that... All these eyes on you, the beautiful nurse behind you, this big, strong doctor with these big, strong hands and that big fucking bulge... but no, this is just a checkup, nothing is going to happen, right?

While you were thinking, I dried my hand off and had begun speaking.

"I'm - I'm sorry?"

"No worries. I was saying, can you remove your top, please? We need to examine your heart and your breathing."

You stare at me. "Remove my - "

"Yes, remove your top. The fewer barriers between me and you, the less interference with my examination." My face is quite serious, almost bored - this really must be routine. You look back at the nurse, and she smiles slightly and nods. So you undress, your nipples betraying you, standing at attention. You blush as the crowd of students looks at you intently. The nurse lays one warm hand on your shoulder, slender fingers gripping you reassuringly, and your eyes are drawn once more to those burgundy nails.

I step in close, and you feel my breath warm on your chest. "Now, observe the stiffness in the patient's nipples - this is to be expected, given the cool air, and it's certainly nothing to be ashamed of," I say, smiling. I press my stethoscope up over your heart, the metal cold on your skin, and your mind is betrayed by the pounding of your heart. My eyes flick up to meet yours, and I grin, predatorily, and once again you feel like a piece of meat beneath the lights.

I examine your breasts, starting with your left. Enclosed in my big, strong hands, I squeeze and push, prod and pull, ostensibly feeling for any abnormalities, but the way my fingers brush over your nipples, the intensity with which I sink them into your soft breasts, heaving now as your breath comes faster... My practiced tongue rasps over one nipple and a tiny moan escapes your lips as you try desperately to hide how much you're enjoying this; try desperately, and fail.

Abruptly, I pull back. "Excellent! All seems well here." I rest one hand on your other shoulder and turn to the students. "Note the pleasure response during this section of the examination, and I hope you were paying attention to the oral technique."

I turn back to you, my eyes dancing as they meet yours. "Fully undress, if you would. The inspection must continue."

Your hands tremble as you slide your clothes down off your waist, and the nurse aids you, her lovely hands stroking along your thighs and calves as she does.

"And spread for us, please."

Obediently, your thighs open, exposing your cunt, your needy, aching wetness, to all.

"Note the beauty of the patient's sex, here. The shape of the folds," I murmur, tracing one finger along your sensitive lips, "the balanced ratio of the clitoris to the vulva overall," sliding two fingers on either side of your clit, squeezing gently between them, "the appropriate pleasure response in - "

You lose what I say as I plunge two fingers inside you, powerful and dextrous, knuckles slipping past your tightness easily. It feels so fucking good to finally have something inside you, after all this aching and teasing, and god, so many people are watching, they're all watching your pussy spread and toyed with by this big, strong, handsome older man, and now the nurse's slender fingers are across your throat and her lips are on your forehead, and she tells you that you're doing so well for me, you've been so good...

My fingers press up inside you, finding your g spot, and with my thumb rubbing on your clit, I start melting you. Waves of pleasure course through your body, you gasp, moan, whimper, and with your eyes closed you can't tell whose lips are so soft on yours, but it feels so fucking good, and all those people are watching and it makes you want it more, your back arching, chest heaving, melting under the attention, and finally, mercifully, you cum, contracting around my fingers, squeezing your thighs together, trembling, shaking, gasping for air. You hear me say something, but you're so overwhelmed with pleasure that all you can make out from my speech is "very, very good".

The hand withdraws from your throat, and I gently, gently, extricate my fingers, and settle my hand atop one thigh, fingers slick with your desire.

The nurse whispers affirmation in your ear as I address the class. "Stimulation in this manner, of the two most sensitive sex stimuli, brings the most consistent and powerful orgasms to those possessing these organs." I stroke the inside of your thigh reassuringly, before turning to you.

"The final part of this examination is seeing how well you handle penetration. I'm going to need your unequivocal verbal consent before proceeding."

The nurse leans in and whispers into your ear, "might I suggest 'please, sir, will you fuck me?'" You'd blush harder if you could.

You swallow, nervously, and there's a twisting in your gut as you say it. "Please," you begin, voice cracking. "Please, sir, will you fuck me?"

"Yes, that is sufficient. I must say, though," I warn, unzipping my jeans, "that I am quite large." I slap my cock down on your tummy, and the sheer weight of it shocks you. You've seen size like this in porn, sure, but fuck, you've never touched something like this. When you tear your gaze away from my cock, I'm grinning down at you, predatory again. "You can back out at any time, you know." My voice is low, teasing, challenging. "Should we continue?"

You nod shakily, and spread your legs a little wider.

One hand on your raised knee, one hand guiding my cock, I push against you. For a moment you realize the exam had to be done in this order; if you weren't so fucking wet, there's no chance you'd be able to take me. But all thoughts are blasted out of your mind as I push harder and slide in.

It's so fucking thick that you can't help but groan. You've never felt so full, so strained inside, being pushed in every direction; you're not built for this, maybe there's just too much, your body is rejecting me - and then I push again, another few inches, and you slam your head back against the padded table, a long, drawn-out "fuuuuuck" wrenched from your lips. You feel my strong hands brace at your hips, and with a final thrust, slamming your cervix up into your guts, moving your entire body, the ridges of my cock sliding deeper and deeper, sliding painfully, pleasurably past your walls, I'm inside you.

The nurse rests her hands on you again, and purrs in your ear, "you're doing so well for him, I know it's hard, it's so hard, but you're doing such a good job, pretty girl..."

Glacially, I pull out, allowing you a moment to rest, before thrusting in again, hands still at your waist. You sob once, loudly, and then you sink into it as I pick up a rhythm, deep, deep strokes inside you. You hear me grunting, whispering something, and I grow more frantic, impaling you a little harder, and through the wall of pleasure you hear me rumble, "nurse V, begin the overstimulation procedure."

"Certainly, doctor." She leans over you, lips fiercely meeting yours, and one of those slender hands reaches down to abuse your clit. An image of those burgundy nails on your cunt flashes through your mind as I continue pounding you, forcing you to spread for me, adjust to me, even as the nurse plays your clit like an instrument, and fuck, she's a virtuoso.

You sing a song of moans and voiceless curses under our combined mastery, knowing your audience is entranced, filled with a blazing, lusty pride. The deep bass of my voice, resonant in your skull, is saying something, but you cannot hear me; you're moaning, groaning, pleading, "yes, yes, oh my god yes" over and over...

The song swells to a crescendo and with two sudden strikes, two powerful thrusts into you, it ends with a thick, hot, sticky white wave of my approval inside you. You feel it pulse deep, deep inside, filling you, load after load delivered straight past your bruised, abused cervix.

You come back to reality with my cum spilling from between your legs, trailing thickly down onto the exam table. I zip up my jeans while the nurse helps dry you off, from all the sweat and saliva. She dabs caringly at your mouth, and you notice that the cloth is dyed the same shade as her lipstick.

"Now," I address the class, "I hope you were paying attention." I rest one hand on your aching, trembling thigh. How many times did you cum with me inside you? How long were all these people watching you writhe beneath me, begging, losing yourself in the pleasure? You have no fucking clue. "This patient has bravely volunteered for each of you to examine her, here and now, while she's available to us."

Your jaw drops. When did you agree to that? You would never - but you were begging, "yes, yes, yes" earlier, weren't you, while I was talking. You agreed. Everyone heard you say it.

"One at a time, please. And," I say to you, grinning wolfishly, "don't worry. I'll be watching the entire time."

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chuluoyi · 1 year ago

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LOVER'S QUARREL

- fushiguro megumi x reader

“i can't do this anymore.” you and megumi are just too different; he's stoic, you're bubbly, he prefers solitude, you love being social. it starts with fights, words you don't mean, and ends with an event that would haunt him for a long time to come.

genre/warnings: angst, breaking up, post-breakup feelings, mentions and description of injury and blood, hurt/comfort, fluff in the end (you make up!)

note: dear god i’m finally getting this out of my drafts. loosely inspired by real life events i’ve seen around my friend’s relationship sooo it might hurt a bit 🤏🏻 but who can say no to angst to eventual fluff? tagging @lees-chaotic-brain and @kasumitenbaz (as per request in the ask!), you two are always here for my megumi works, thank you!! :3 and thank you for dropping by for the event!

a part of 1K MILESTONE EVENT

general masterlist

Everyone pointed it out as a joke, that you liked him way more than he did you.

And you used to never let it ruffle you. To you, Megumi’s sternness and silence meant that he was comfortable with you. You never wanted him to change his ways just because now you were seeing each other.

But when you thought it over now, as you stood before him with an aghast expression and knives stabbing your kind, soft heart, you couldn’t help but do a double-take.

You were the one who confessed first. Most of the time, you were the one who initiated dates. You always texted him first, asking about his day, and even when he brushed you off, you would keep being this ball of sunshine and wished him a good day.

You never realized it before… that through everything, it has always been you. Unfailingly.

So how dare he spout this now?

“I can't do this anymore.”

"You... can't?" you spat out, feeling the first tendrils of anger course through you. "What exactly it is that you can't do? What do you even mean?"

"Look," Megumi stared at you squarely, and you thought now, that it was the coldest of eyes, straight and true. "It's always been like this between us lately. It's only right that we end this."

This, he said. He didn't even want to define your relationship anymore.

You scoffed. "And why do you think we always end up this way? Have you ever considered, even once, that it's because you make no effort at all?"

"I'm trying," Megumi quickly replied, almost in a hiss, and you almost recoiled. "But I just see that we'll end up nowhere, that's why I'm bringing this up now."

Oh, that freaking hurts. You boyfriend had just told you that this relationship would go nowhere. Right in your face.

Your eyes stung with tears, yet you fought to hold them back, fixing your gaze on the lamp overhead and inhaling deeply.

"You're... selfish," you stated, filled with ire. "You're always walking around eggshells around me, never telling me what is it that you really want—"

Megumi's unclouded eyes fixed on your trembling form. "We just disagree on a lot of things. You know it and it bothers you. It bothers me too. Rather than forcing our relationship, I think it's better—"

"It's always me!" you yelled then, lips quivering and eyes watering, unable to hold your emotions back any longer. "All dates, lunches—everything!" you locked your eyes with him, in mocking disbelief. "How can you say you're trying when, in truth, I'm the one putting in so much for us?!"

In that very second, Megumi thought that he hated seeing you like this. You were supposed to be the cheerful one in this relationship, and when he agreed to go out with you, he made an unspoken commitment to himself that he would at least not make you miserable.

And yet...

"...I'm sorry."

Came his reply, and you were sure that this was it.

And to rub the salt in your wound, he added, "I can't lie to you and say I haven't thought this for a while too."

As tears welled within you, you wondered and questioned what you lacked that led to this. However, the overwhelming sense of betrayal consuming your thoughts ultimately prevailed over any other emotions.

Now he could've appeared before you as a stranger and you wouldn't bat an eye, as the cold steel in his tone said, "And if blaming me is what it takes to make you feel better, then so be it."

You couldn't pinpoint the source of your sudden boldness, but in the next hot minute, you marched past him, your shoulder harshly colliding with his in a deliberate, almost spiteful manner—which, indeed, was your intention—and then you ran.

Which led to the next scene: you found yourself bawling your eyes out in the girls' lavatory.

Yuji and Nobara saw everything unfolding right before their eyes. They hadn't meant to eavesdrop, but you and Megumi were literally breaking up right the middle of their shared classroom, and it was hard not to follow the discourse until the end.

"Are you okay?" Nobara had come to your side, ensuring privacy by locking the restroom door out of your consideration. You were a sobbing mess, attempting to wipe the overflowing tears away while letting out all your emotions.

"He's..." Your voice faltered amid sobs as you gazed at your steadfast friend, your throat clogging up. "He said... he's been wanting t-to... break up with m-me..."

"That's okay, that's okay..." Nobara brought you to her arms, patting your back in reassurance. "Fushiguro is insensitive like that... don't cry over him now. He's just a wimp, okay?"

"Why is it me?" you asked her, voice brittle, still shaking with tears. "I t-tried everything! Being the supportive girlfriend..."

"If he can't appreciate what you did, then the problem lies with him," your friend stated, traces of irritation brewing in her resolute gaze. And as she firmly grasped your wrist, her next words resonated. "Not you."

. . .

"Do you really have to break her heart like that?" Yuji fidgeted with his hoodie, staring at his best friend with a blend of confusion and sympathy.

Megumi sighed, finally ruffling his hair into a mess, as if expressing his own state of mind. “This is for the best.”

Yuji’s eyebrows visibly creased. “How is this ‘for the best’? She’s miserable, and you…” he assessed him, scanning him from head to toe, “it doesn’t seem you’re faring any better too.”

“The longer she is with me, the unhappier she will be.” Megumi glanced at the bathroom’s direction. “She can deserve better.”

He was always too quiet, too boring, not able to match your energy too. He couldn’t fault you for expecting more, whereas he was just not exactly built for your expectations.

Megumi really thought he wanted it to end. At one point, it even felt like a chore, but…

How strange. Why did it feel like something was clawing at his chest?

Time heals. Megumi knew that by theory, but he really did see it firsthand when he saw you all giggling and happy again three weeks after he initiated the breakup.

With Hakari.

“Yo, what are you glaring at?” Panda asked, but Megumi didn’t pay him any mind.

An upperclassman, Hakari Kinji, was naturally cool and talented. He was laid back, knew how to have fun—all in all, a total opposite of Fushiguro Megumi altogether.

Three weeks. It’s only been three weeks since then.

“Megumi?”

Wait… Aren’t three weeks too fast to get over your ex?

“Megumi!”

“Huh?” he turned to the sentient panda with a jerk. “Oh, what is it?”

He looked at him with a concerned gaze. "Why do you look so scary? It's almost as if you're about to punch someone..."

But who was he to argue? He had no right to be upset now.

"Is it Kinji?" Panda gasped, finally putting two and two together when he followed his line of sight. "Oh Megumi... but you—"

"Just shut up, please," he blurted then, a hint of annoyance in his tone. With that, Panda didn't pursue it further, leaving him with his thoughts.

From where he was at the field, he could clearly see your radiant smile for Hakari. It was clear that the two of you shared a degree of friendship, but Megumi never knew that you two were that close.

...huh?

Why did the sight irritate him so suddenly? Why did his chest twinge again?

What a fool. You're the one driving her away, you idiot.

Suddenly these memories popped up one by one—

Of you suddenly hugging him from behind in an attempt to surprise him.

How he pressed his lips on the crown of your head when you fall asleep on his shoulder.

How you would give him that dopey smile when he pulled you close.

But on harder days after missions gone wrong, he’d ignore you altogether— the slight disappointment in your smile then. How your expression fell when he told you to go. How you slumped and looked back in hopes of him changing his mind.

“Haaaah.” Megumi turned away, unwilling to keep watching you any longer. Why? Why hadn’t it occurred to him before now?

Why did he long for you now? Why not before, when you were still his?

They were right. It seems people tend to desire what isn't meant for them.

What could have been more painfully awkward than being sent into a mission with your ex-boyfriend?

You would kill Gojo for this. Or at least give him the lowest possible score in his teaching evaluation for the year. How could he? Your breakup was an infamous public spectacle, so this setup was undoubtedly intentional!

You were losing your head over this, and yet your ex-boyfriend...

"Keep your guard up," Megumi reminded curtly, in a warning tone. He looked as vigilant and straight as always, as if he wasn't even bothered.

You threw him a dirty look, offended. "You don't have to tell me twice."

This just cranked up the discomfort to an excruciating level. The mix of unresolved tension and memories—okay, you might be an emo, but how were you supposed to be cool with all of these hanging in the air?

Your site of exorcism was an abandoned warehouse, and the cursed spirit in question was supposed to be a grade 3. You two were grade 2 sorcerers now, so you were a perfect fit to exorcise it. But there was indeed this unease in the air that you couldn't put your finger to.

"Isn't it awfully too quiet?" you unwittingly muttered, staring at the darkness of the wall. You couldn't feel any cursed energy belonging to any possible malevolent entity, and that was what unsettled you the most.

Megumi frowned at your line of sight. "It is. Stay close."

You blinked at what he said, and before you knew it, the familiar scent of him being near to you made your entire body burst with this equally familiar warmth. When you looked up to him, seeing the solid sharpness in that dark eyes of his and his jaw set, dead butterflies in your chest rose back to life again, against your heartbreak and better judgement.

Stay close, he said... So he is worried...

And in an attempt to hide how flustered you were, you looked down.

You walked a few good steps, when suddenly he asked, "So, are you with Hakari-senpai now?"

"Huh?" You spun around, your expression a mix of surprise and confusion.

"You two seem close."

Seem close? Seem close... wait, so Megumi had noticed...?

Suddenly, you felt incited and it made you angry. "That's none of your business," your voice carried a sharp edge, hissing. And you knew you were being a bit mean by adding, "You broke up with me, so why do you even care?"

In that moment, Megumi could've sworn his chest throbbed. Your cutting tone pierced directly into his heart, lodging itself there.

You had all rights to be annoyed, and he knew that. Why did that question even slip out of him?

"Nah, nevermind," he mumbled in response, looking away.

Awkwardness lingered afterwards. You hated this, but no, you weren't above being petty. He had broken your heart and it still stung even now. If your intentionally biting words did to him even a fraction of what he made you feel, then you would find a small sense of satisfaction in it.

But you weren't able to ponder about your mess of feelings further when Megumi abruptly yanked your arm, his voice soaking with urgency, "It's here!"

Sure enough, the grotesque cursed spirit with the shape of a giant bee broke through the walls with a bang. The two of you immediately readied your fighting stance. Megumi was ready with his divine dogs, while you with your cursed weapon.

For a while, you engaged the cursed spirit with all you had. You were trying to focus on the enemy, but you couldn't help but notice the way Megumi always looked at you every few seconds, checking for any signs of injury or harm.

Frankly speaking, he trusted your strength and knew that you were a capable sorcerer. You had been paired in a mission before and he knew both your potential and shortcomings. It was just there was something about this place that had his senses on high alert.

And his fears were proven true when you yelped and were flung onto the grimy floor. "Y/N!"

"I'm fine!" you shouted in a rush, scrambling to your feet. However, as you spun towards him, your scream tore through the hall as you caught sight of the bee lurking behind him. "Megumi!"

He got distracted. The bee quickly latched onto him and almost stung him, until he wrestled it off and summoned Nue and exorcised it.

You went to his side that instant. "Are you okay?!"

"I am." But then he winced and almost fell on his knees if you didn't have a secure grip on him. He savored your touch and breathed a sigh of relief, thinking that now you two were safe.

"Megumi! Oh god!" Panic surged through you as you pulled him close. His side was bleeding, and you widened your eyes at the sight.

"I'm okay, I promise," he rasped, looking you in the eyes. "What abo—"

Then you saw it, the flicker from deep from that corner of platform, and suddenly, you grasped the source of the unease that had been lingering within you all this time. It wasn't the bee Megumi had just exorcised—

At that moment, there was no room for thought, one thing was certain: you didn't want him to get hurt more.

He didn't manage to finish his sentence when suddenly you pushed him away with so much force he never thought you had. Everything crashed so suddenly, he didn't have the time to brace himself or grab you with him, as another cursed bee appeared out of nowhere and—

Reality flashed before his eyes as he stared at you in sheer horror. At how the cursed spirit tore your body, sinking its hollow stinger in you.

You didn't really know what happened next. Everything was muffled—the frantic movements around you turned into a blur, along with Megumi's yells. Otherworldly pain coursed through your entire being and your ears rang, then everything in your line of sight became distorted and faded, along with your consciousness. Next and the last thing you knew was Megumi's battered face, a final imprint before you succumbed to the void.

Megumi had exorcised the remaining cursed spirit and staggered to his feet—falling a few times, but he made his way towards you through gritted teeth. You are hurt. He forced himself to get to you and pull you into his arms.

And suddenly, suddenly, nothing mattered anymore as overwhelming terror consumed him upon seeing you. Blood streamed from your abdomen so much that it made a continuous pool.

"You stupid—!" He choked out, voice hitching. You were no longer conscious and it devastated him even more. "Hey, hey? Wake up—hells—"

You, who did everything you could to save your relationship. You, who cried tears for him when he blatantly broke your heart. And you, who put himself first—and now facing the consequences.

It crashed upon him in that very second, the clarity. What was he thinking back then? He still loves you.

"If you die on me, I won't forgive you."

Megumi scooped you in his arms, pressing you close to his chest, the blood seeping from his wound be damned as he looked at your serene face. His heart shattered in the worst way possible and he almost wheezed at the sticky sensation of your blood—and how lifeless you felt in his grasp—but he willed it away.

"Don't," his broken rasp echoed the walls as he took each step to get both of you out of this hellhole. He winced and hissed at his own injury, chewing his lip in frustration, at how helpless he was.

"Don't leave me."

It was like a distant, hazy memory.

Was it a memory though? No. It seemed far too real for that.

The throbbing headache pounding through your skull and shivers that wracked your body pulled you back to reality. There was a heavy pressure on your abdomen and any movement sent sharp pain shooting through you.

You gradually opened your eyes, squinting against the brightness. You were in a hospital gown, an IV was injected on your arm, and the sterile scent made your stomach twist, as nausea creeping through your guts. Your vision was still blurry as you tried to look around to find someone who waited for you. As you slowly turned your head to the side, you saw him, sitting in the chair right next your bed.

Megumi was sleeping in such uncomfortable position, his head resting on the edge of your bed. He appeared peaceful, almost childlike, devoid of his usual stoic demeanor.

Your heartstrings were tugged at this rare sight. He also sustained injuries and yet... he was waiting for you to wake up, here.

Your chest swelled with warmth, which was quickly followed by a sting of heartbreak. Still, you two broke up...

You jolted, and the inadvertent movement sent a wave of pain that seemed to paralyze your nerves, causing you to whimper. The noise woke Megumi from his slumber, as he shot his eyes open in alarm, catching your hand in his.

"Hey... Are you okay?" Megumi worriedly looked down at you with a visible frown, and the grimace of pain on your face, accompanied by trembling lips, was enough of an answer. He hastily scrambled out in slight panic, "I'll get Ieiri-san."

When Shoko came and got you the painkillers, your pain receded somewhat. Through it all, Megumi stood there, casting concerned glances in your way.

"Bedrest for the week," Shoko stated firmly, assessing your wound with a no-nonsense expression. "Your injury isn't minor—it's serious enough that you're strongly advised against excessive movement."

You could only nod in response. Megumi bowed. "Thank you, Ieiri-san." Once the doctor departed, silence settled over the room once more.

“Why did you do that?” he quietly asked then, referring to what you did for him. And when you turned to him, you saw it clearly.

He looked pale, and there was this haunted look in his eyes. It broke your heart a little.

"You were hurt." Your voice came out dry, and you realized firsthand just how parched you were. Seeing Megumi looking down never quite sat right with you. He was meant to be an unwavering presence, someone strong enough to sway your convictions.

However, a pang struck when he countered with stern eyes, "You didn't have to do that."

...he was right. You didn't have to. What he didn't know was that you were still holding on these stupid feelings, which drove you to shield him. It made you ponder: if your roles were reversed, would he not step in to protect you at all?

"Why are you here?" You weren't sure if the bitterness in your tone was evident, but you continued anyway. "You don't have to be here either."

"Don't have to?" His gaze bore disbelief, as if not believing your words. "I'm—"

"If it's because I saved you, Megumi—"

“Do not even think, even for a moment, that I won’t be concerned over you.” His voice, deep and hoarse, struck you to the core, silencing your words. “Never. I always, always want you to be safe.”

Your mind became a blank slate. Suddenly, all that mattered was his voice.

"Don't you realize how terrifying it was? Seeing you like that?" Megumi spat, his green eyes shining with intensity, teeth gritted and fists clenched. "How could you even think that I wouldn't be here—" his breath hitched, and then his lips trembled slightly, "—for you?"

You blinked quickly, a feeling stirred within you—stemming from that cursed, fragile heart of yours to be exact, evident from the rapid thumping in your chest.

You dumbly uttered, "But we are—"

"Oh, Goddamnit." Megumi cursed, and honestly you were taken aback. It wasn't really in him to swear, so this really bugged him. He ran a hand through his hair in frustration, and despite the situation, your heart skipped a beat at the sight. Even a mess in a hospital gown, your ex-boyfriend was still undeniably attractive.

He stared at you squarely in the eye, unflinching, steadfast and true, the very image of Fushiguro Megumi you admired from afar and fell in love with in the first place half a year ago. "You don't have to... say anything, if you don't want to. Right now... just hear me out."

And the things he said next... all of them, you could say, caught you entirely off guard.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry for not trying hard enough, and—damn it, for making you sad. I never, ever wanted to see you that upset."

Megumi drew in a sharp breath, averting his gaze. "And for days, I've wondered if you and Hakari-senpai are now a thing... and you know what? I hate it so much. I know I have no grounds to feel this way, after what I did, but..."

And like a train wreck, his final words hit you hard. Tears welled up in your eyes in immediate response.

“I'm a loser, and a coward too, maybe,” he shrugged, a tinge of self-deprecation in his tone. “And I suck at telling people my feelings, but I love you. I still do.”

A sob slipped out of your throat and you hastily pulled the blanket over your face, much to his surprise. He thought he had worsened things, with the way you were turning away from him.

But then, from beneath the blanket, in a croaky voice, you proclaimed, "Fushiguro Megumi, you're a complete and utter idiot."

And Megumi didn't know that he had been holding back his breath as he chuckled heartily, relieved that you would still take his ass back after this prolonged mess. He knew he still had a lot to make up for and was determined to show it through his actions.

"Maybe I am, yeah."

"That's possibly the longest shit you have ever spouted in one breath."

"Yeah..."

But he got his chance back, and he knew that you would be alright. Both of you are.

On one sunny day...

"Hey, are you alone?"

Megumi glanced up from his phone, only to be met with a random girl standing in front of him, batting her eyelashes with an ambiguous intent. He blinked at her curiously.

"No. Can I help you?"

The girl twirled her hair suggestively. "Ah, you see... I see you all in your lonesome and I think you're quite cute—"

The hell? Megumi frowned, and he was really about to give this bimbo a piece of his mind when—

Oh, oh. Forget that. Megumi's attention snapped to you on the opposite side of the crossroad. All pretty and dolled up with that crop tee and miniskirt he once mentioned would look great on you by a slip of tongue—that accidental comment earned him your teasing quips for weeks already.

"Sorry, I'm here for my girlfriend. Bye."

Abruptly dismissing the girl, he didn't catch how comically offended she was for being turned down in a span of 20 seconds. He took big strides towards you, as you crossed the street, and you immediately beamed when you caught the sight of his face.

"Megumi!"

Ah, this is going to be a good day, he thought. As he gazed at your pretty face, and caught your hand in his, clasping it tightly, reveling in your scent and the warmth of your presence beside him—

He was content, and once again it dawned on him, that he likes you so, so damn much.

"Let's get started on our date, shall we?"

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